#i hold hands with my boyfriend a lot but also. my best friends. friends. aquaintances if theyre willing

[pansyfemme]

oh also . holding ur hand if u want. alternatively, giving u this beautiful ice cube 🧊 (in case u don't want to hold hands) (that's all i got tho if u don't like the ice cube im out of ideas sowwy) k thx byeeeeeeeee (for realsies this time) (probably)

woag,,, big fan of the cube for sure

[natromanxoff]

I wasn’t sure about posting this at first but as it is already shared publicly and I have come across with it on Pinterest, I decided that it would be okay. So here is a story of a fan about Jim Hutton:

“ON 23rd of March, there was a Queen Tribute band concert in Goresbridge and my boyfriend told me that Jim would come as well. He admitted that he had arranged with Stephen for Jim to come along. The concert was in the pub called The Spirit Store. What a great name for spiritual meeting, I thought. When I entered, Jim sat at the table with Stephen, Jascqueline, her sister Valeria and other family friends. There was nowhere to sit, so we just stood by the table for a while. When I looked at Jim, he appeared somewhat fragile and tiny, like a man who could easily be overlooked. He didn´t look anything like those photos portraying him in the books.

After a while, there was a free seat by the table and everyone, including Jim, moved in order for us to sit down. It was just one place and my friend Mike wanted to take it. He got up fast but they all stopped him. Jim measured Mike up and down and told him, "Perhaps you should let the lady sit here, you cavalier!" Embarassed, Mike got up from his chair and offered it to me. I got the honorable place alongside Jim. Being a woman sometimes has its advantages! Jim welcomed me with heartfelt "Hi". At first I was nervous, but after a while I felt relaxed and enjoyed Jim's company. I was aware of his behavior, gestures, laughter, and tried to absorb his energy all at once. It was easy to talk to him about anything and everything.

I wanted to know the man Freddie loved so much, so I guess I started giving him many questions.

"Jim, are you still in touch with Phoebe?" Jim looked at me closely and began to talk to me with interest. "I haven´t really been talking to him for a long time. I know he had a hotel in Dubai, then he sold it, and he's in Prague now. He also bought something overthere and I think he's going to settle down there." When I heard about Prague, I jumped up excitedly and told him that I was from there. He smiled a little, though the coincidence like this didn´t overwhelm him as much as me.

He relished glass of Budwaiser and smoked Ultra light Silk Cuts. He offered me one and lit it up for me like a real gentleman. It seemed he wanted to continue talking. We both made fun of the ultralight effect of his cigarettes, which would probably piss off every orthodox smoker, Freddie for sure! He then demonstrated jokingly, how to properly smoke them. He inhaled all the smoke by sucking in his cheeks and widening his eyes, as if he should soon burst like an inflated toad. None of us resisted and we both burst into a mad laughter. I told him about my visit to Munich and meeting Barbara. He smiled and listened, then he rolled his eyes up to heaven and stated that she is one hell of a crazy woman. I totally agreed, and added, that also alcoholic one. It was surreal to talk about mutual aquaintances together, people we both knew. I also mentioned my visit to New York club and I could see how he returns nostalgically into his memories. Then I also tried to make him remember my friend Allison, who told me about him in the first place.

"About nine years ago she visited you in London". He couldn´t remember and admitted, that since then a lot of people have passed through his life and many of them he never saw again.

I continued. "She showed me several of your photos and in one of them you were holding Freddie's portrait that you bought at the auction". Suddenly he jumped up and said he knew whom I mean.

I showed him my miniature box containing a stone and talked about it with almost patriotic pride. "It's a stone from Logan Mews that I had to dig out from under the threshold of his house, because there was nothing else to take." Jim laughed out loud, this time without any hindrance and doubt that I was totally crazy. I also laughed because I knew I sound like nuts. He remarked with smile from ear to ear that I was pretty crazy. "Yeah, I'm crazy, and I'm proud to be. Who isn´t...and by the way.....why not?" I smiled at what I just said, because that´s what Freddie would say, to defend himself. Jim then talked about the medallion that Freddie had given him for his birthday. He said, there were three miniature pictures inside. "The first is that of Miko ", he said gently, looking up at me to make sure I knew who he was talking about. "In the other one is Freddie" ... he continued with kind of fervor and love. Something deep inside me shivered. "In the third one," ... he didn´t answer yet, when I jumped into his monologue ...."Tiffany," I blurted out.

"My mom's photo," he finished his sentence. (and I prayed he didn´t register my answer).

It was nice to hear him remembering like that. He opened up in front of me the way I never dreamt of. I think it was nice for him to share these beautiful moments and to talk about things that meant so much to him. "This rock is my good luck charm. I have been listening to Queen since I´m twelve and I also work in the Fan Club's office. We celebrate his anniversary every year. When I went here, I was kidding with my friends that I might meet Jim Hutton in Ireland... and here you are, sitting right next to me. That´s my dream come true", I said all emotional.

"How do you know Stephen?", he inquired after while.

"I go out with Vinnie and they are good friends" He eyed my boyfriend and indicated that he knew who he was.

"I was annoying the two of them and was constantly asking them to bring you", I smiled.

"Oh, Jacqueline wanted me to come, alright" Jim smiled at the thought. Then he talked about the music talent competition, in which they were selecting the best imitators of Queen.

"What music are you actually listening to?" I wondered.

"I have no favorite, I'm listening to almost everything. Even a radio".

"And do you still have Zig and Zag?"

He only sighed and said in a sad voice that they had both died since then.

"And do you have any other cats?"

"Yeah, I have seven others now," Jim smiled. This number didn´t surprise me. The old habits are hard to kill.

"Do you still keep up the gardening, Jim?"

"Constantly," he said with a loving smile and amusedly showed me his hands dirty from the clay and covered in sores. For God's sake, he must have been gardening a few minutes before going to a concert!, I thought to myself. A complete garden maniac.....

We were joking on the account of the band that was supposed to start playing long time ago, but somehow did not. He told me it would be nice to get drunk, so we didn´t know how terrible they were. That really made me crack up. He could be so funny.

He joked and emphasized to everyone around the table, that instead of a concert he could have been at home watching his favorite movie. In the same breath, he admitted that he was curious about their performance and that he hadn´t been out in ages.

He leaned over to me and confessed, that now he lived a life completely cut off from the rest of the world.

"We are basically the same, I am basically like him. Now I just enjoy loneliness and privacy. I don´t go out anywhere except my garden". I immediately knew whom he was referring to in his speech.

I said that I had discovered his house in Palatine and apologized when I saw his slightly concerned look. I said I was just little curious.

He then recalled a few of his encounters with the fans. One day there was an unknown car with a couple of strangers that arrived to his house. They came all way from Vienna and they found him by questioning people in a town! Not a hard thing to trace him, he said, as every cab driver in the area knows him pretty well. One local newspaper even published a photo of his house, and although they gave a wrong address, a lot of people had found him.

That made me laugh, because I knew what it means to be a devoted fan.

"On the other hand, it's nice to know that someone is constantly looking after you and giving you the feeling that all this is still alive," I added with a smile.

"Jim, do you still have your Volvo?"

"You mean the one that Freddie gave me?.....No, I don´t have it few years now, I´ve swapped it for a new one," he smiled.

He was all too gallant all the time, always lighting my cigarette.

He also wondered how long I would stay in Ireland, so I said that only another half a year.

"And you wanna come back here?" He asked suddenly.

"Oh, I'd love to. I'm trying to find a job either in Carlow or Kilkenny," I said enthusiastically.

Then I fell silent, looked at him and assured him "Definitely."

Each time he looked up into my eyes, I saw an incredibly nice person in front of me. Something in his silent expression suggested that he had suffered great deal of pain in life, but that he was now completely reconciled with his fate. Still, in his eyes shone a spark of unrelenting humor. In his company I forgot all about the world. I was happy to be able to make such an affluent and warm contact with him. The longer we knew each other, the closer we were.

When he wanted to go to the toilet, Stephen told him that the men's toilets were behind the bar and the ladies in front of the bar. It sounded like he wasn´t quite sure which one would Jim prefer.

But Jim didn´t care much and set off to the men's. I admit it made me laugh a little.

Then we continued our dialogue. I mentioned that I read both his and Phoebe's book, but that I couldn´t find his book anywhere in the stores. He confirmed that it´s out of print at the minute.

When I told him that I had stolen his book at the local library, he laughed and said that I should have asked him and he would have given me a copy, but he only had Italian version.

Finally, the band started to play. Everyone in the pub stood up and whole lot of us - as we were tucked in at the back, climbed onto the window ledges. I stood next to Jim, who remained seated.

He looked a little bit run over. I knew he was surrounded by the loneliness and I watched him with sadness. I lacked much power or words to comfort him. It was only after some wonderful songs that we both joined and got up. He could not remain sad in such a loving and friendly company for ever.

When he noticed the enormous, life-vibrant energy that only Queen music could produce in conjunction with a crowd of people singing, I think he forgot his personal pain. I could see pride in his face. He stood up and watched the band. Then he addressed me and made me come up onto the ledge above him to see better. I would not listen to anybody else, but from him it didn´t sound like an order. He wanted me to get the most out of it and it pleased me. Then we sat back and drank. Jim seemed to be getting cheerful and livelier. The more he drank, the more cheerful he was. The guys ordered him Red Bull with vodka. When I asked him if it was vodka, he claimed it was white lemonade! He put a warm glass of "vodka" on my hand, so I almost jumped out of my skin, which he thought was terribly funny.

Whatever he did, he looked at me as though I was the only person who knew what was behind his looks. His faces and funny grimaces reminded me of Freddie. He had a lot of subconsciously inherited poses and gestures from him. Even in his laughter I could detect an influence of Freddie's strong personality. He simply marked all people around him. It was not the same contagious and stormy laugh, but there was a spark of resemblance.

His niece Jacqueline, Valerie and Stephen, danced all the time on the ledge and Jim was pulling them and wrapping himself in between their legs, hugging them, clinging to them, and messing around like a little boy. It was a wonderful sight, as he was so happy and childish.

After some time, Jim lost himself in a crowd of concert goers, so I went to look for him. Without his company it felt such a sad place. It was as if he had fallen through the ground, which made me very nervous. Finally, I found him by the entrance table, where he was joking away with one old blonde, not too different from frivolous Barbara Valentin. I asked him for a photo together. At first he looked impenetrable but as soon as I threw a sad eye and smirked, he brightened up and agreed as if saying "You know you can, anything for you, darling"

His niece Valerie took our picture. He then whispered to me that he hopes I´ll send him some pictures later.

After that he announced that we are going back inside to listen to the band.

I saw them from close-up and I must say that it was much better to just hear them. They looked rather too comic with all their wigs. It was something that would make Freddie laugh too.

I told Jim that they don´t look very natural,which he agreed with, but he said he couldn´t complain about their music. He was totally right, because musically they weren´t bad and the singer had a very authentic voice.

Inside, everybody was dancing and Jim joined in and circled around them like a rogalo.

The whole pub vibrated with intense and loving energy. There was no one who would be bored. Jim then threw himself in the arms of his two nieces, who gently caressed him in his hair and embraced him. He let them take care of him, now vulnerable like a little lost child all of a sudden.

There was something deeply touching about it. He had closed his eyes and sadly lowered his head, as if his tears flowed deep inside, in his invisible world. I realized at this stage, how much he really loved Freddie. I was looking at him and I had a desire to caress him and comfort him but instead, I had to stand aside.

"You can have everything and yet feel alone", Freddie once said. But I was glad Jim had his family and friends around him, who cared and protected him. Jim was going through sorrow and joy,both at the same time, it seemed.

During one of his many shananigans, I caught him messing around with his niece's boyfriend.

He sat him on his knees and imitated sexual intercourse. It would seem offensive and utterly crazy to someone who didn´t know him. But we all did. Jim was laughing like crazy and when he finally looked at me, he seemed a little embarrassed by his behavior and gave me a look that said"I hope you won´t tell on me to Freddie"...but it was hard to take him seriously.

We both smiled conspiratorially at each other. In that sense, our relationship no matter how short-lived, was special. We understood one another in thoughts. He winked at me a couple of times, tapping my beer like an old buddy.

In one moment in particular, Jim leaned over me and whispered: "You as a fan have right to be crazy, but them" ... pointing at our dancing group of friends ... " they are fucked up", he said with smile and he began to knock his finger against his forehead. An international gesture that doesn´t need an interpreter!

Jim then went to the toilets for a while, and I, like a stray sheep, followed him through crowds of oblivious dancers. He was somewhat drunk at that time and barely retained a balance. He staggered a little like a broken tree. No surprise after god knows how many Red bulls and vodkas! I was bit afraid for him, so I supported him inconspicuously by both shoulders from behind. He went to the toilet and cared too little to even close the door behind him. If anyone was looking, he would see Jim Hutton pissing in a toilet bowl in his bright canary shirt.

At that moment they played the most touching song of all, These are the Days of our lives .... I stood by the door and listened, watching the band and waited for Jim. I don´t know why, perhaps because of the fate that brought me here, I suddenly felt terrible sorrow. I was sorry for Freddie and Jim. Tears poured into my eyes. I didn´t cry, but was very close to it. Jim suddenly appeared next to me and noticed my face. "What about those tears? I hope you don´t cry", but at this stage I was lost for words. His concern made me sad even more. Something inside me forced me to caress him. I hugged him gently around his neck and put my head on his shoulder for a moment. I wanted to let him know that I am very sorry about what happened to Freddie. He did not resist. He knew he wasn´t the only one in the world who was missing him. I looked into his eyes, and I told him a sentence that I didn´t know why I said, but I strongly felt it..."Jim, he's here, he IS here." His expression was rather confused at first. "Do you believe me?" ... I said this with a seriousness and a certain degree of self-assurance that he froze for a while. He looked thoughtful. He knew what I was talking about.

I seemed to only confirm his inner conviction. He didn´t say a word. He wiped my tear away with the edge of his hand and without warning, took me firmly by the hand and led me through crowds back to our friends. There was a lot of care and love in his touch. The music was just playing and Freddie just sang "I still love you" and I knew he did.

I didn´t want to leave, but I knew I said everything I needed to. I could not leave without saying goodbye. It would be a sin after all this to just disappear into eternity. I interrupted him from the conversation with someone else, leaned over the table and said, "Jim, I'm leaving now, so I want to say goodbye, it was great pleasure meeting you." I smiled as much as my heart allowed me to and shook his hand. He stared up and thought for a moment, and then, without any hesitance said, "We do not see each other for the last time." I didn´t know at this time how true his words were.

I thought I did not understand well, so I asked again, "sorry?" and he repeated patiently and more resolutely, "I shall surely see you again," while taking my hand into his hands and kissing it gently.

He left me in amazement. I stumbled out from there perplexed but still I could hear him talking about me to someone there. He probably said he hadn´t seen a bigger nutcase in a long time, assuming from his cute teddybear smile. Gosh I loved him so much!

The next day I learned from my friends that Jim was looking next morning for his jacket that he had forgotten in his car. Few days later, I've sent him the promised photographs. Jacquie confirmed that he called in to say he had received them allright.”

2001

“...And then I returned back to Ireland in 2004.

I had the opportunity to welcome Jim to my own home in Carlow sometime in 2006. He was Stephen´s surprise. When the door opened up, I didn´t see him at first.

Then his head popped out from the side of the door and with a laugh he emerged a bit later. He hugged me like we hadn´t seen each other for million years. What I felt at that moment was indescripable. My dear Jim back in my life and in my own house!

We all sat in the living room, Jim settled down on the sofa, I was sitting on the ground and absorbed the precious moments because I knew time spent with him was only borrowed time. Then we watched Queen videos and talked about Freddie as if he were in the next room. It was so surreal. Me and Jim agreed that our favorite video was Scandal, and he just added that Freddie didn´t like it very much because he couldn´t make any creative input in it, although he loved the song.

Then we talked about his illness, about him taking up to 40 pills a day to sustain his health and he also explained the difference between AIDS and HIV, as many people still didn´t know. We have talked so much and - above all - we laughed all night, almost at everything. It was so easy to succumb to his funny personality once again and to his heartfelt laughter. He made jokes about fancying my ex-boyfriend, whom he lied on top of on the sofa. Long time ago, I´ve sent him a letter explaining to him how Freddie has impacted my life. But I've forgotten I´ve ever written it and now I was faced with the horror that I actually have sent it. I hoped he has forgotten about it, but when Jim and I met in the corridor of our house, I couldn´t but apologize to him for that letter, and for being so daring. To my surprise, he looked at me softly with his tired eyes and assured me that my letter was absolutely fascinating. Then we were interrupted by Stephen, who was just leaving a toilet and the conversation was cut short at that point. Unfortunatelly I would never have the chance to find out what was the next thing he was about to say, because I noticed he wanted to continue, if he weren´t interrupted.

When we were saying goodbye at the door, he treated me as an old friend. He simply kissed me on the lips, which utterly shocked me and made me laugh at the same time.

He invited us back to his house to have a little party, but my ex-boyfriend was not in the perfect mood and so we politely declined, which I will forever regret!

About a year after that I bumped into Jim several times in the city where we both lived, or we exchanged text messages whenever I needed to advise what room flowers would be best for our new house. Sometimes I learnt about how he´s doing through my ex-boyfriend, who used to hang out with him and drink few pints in a night bar. Once my ex confessed how Jim told him that I was a great person and he should be happy to have me. They must have been talking about me!!!!

Then I met Jim one night in the nightclub, where he was with his friends. He spent most of his time sitting in the lounge smoking a cigarette, having fun with younger girls. Wherever he was, you heard his laughter. That night my ex-boyfriend arranged for Jim and me to have a dance together.

Jim was just dancing on the dancefloor with some older woman. I remember he had his jumper tied around his waist. I just got onto the dancefloor, he looked at me all serious and pulled me close to him. It was some tediously slow song that I can´t even remember, I just know that we were staggering from side to side like two handiccaped penguins and that made me laugh hysterically.

He was such a clown! Now, however, I consider this moment as one of the most precious memories of him. It was my night.

Back in 2009, I have learned that Jim was diagnosed with cancer. My ex-boyfriend told me how concerned Jim was when informing him. He said, he wept. At that time I didn´t know how serious the situation was and I hoped Jim will get better in no time. I believed the doctors would somehow help him out of it. I saw him a little later at work when he came to our restaurant for breakfast.

I almost served him as another customer, but when I realized it was him, I pulled myself back into the kitchen and let the other girls serve him. He never noticed. I was in such state of shock. I didn´t know what to do, how to act and what to say. He was so thin, just skin and bone. His face was sinking, his eyes full of pain, a small tube leading from his nose to the oxygen device he carried in his backpack and a small canvas hat on his head. I couldn´t believe this was Jim, whom I have remembered being so full of life and joy only half a year ago. I wanted to cry like never before. I also felt embarassed by my own cowardly reaction. I wished more than anything in my life to hug him and say I loved him. I wanted to wish him a happy Christmas. But I was scared of my own tears, which would not help him in his situation.

I wrote him a message on the phone, but he didn´t respond. And then I got the terrible news. Jim died and somehow I also missed his funeral. I took a first taxi and went at least to his months Mass and visited his grave, bringing him daffodils and little white lantern with candle. It was so hard for me. His relatives stood above his grave. I said my prayers in a minute of silence. The air didn´t move and the moon was full in the night sky. It was dark and cold all around but I didn´t care.

I wanted to see him laugh and mess around like he used to. It was as if another star had disappeared and fell to the earth. If only life could last forever.”

2006-2010

Credits to Seraphiel’s blog. Please don’t repost without credits.

[firefiyfunhouse]

folie a deux; roderick strong

My first request! For the lovely @ueomega​! So so sorry it took so long but I really hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think <3

Warnings: language and soft roddy strong, not that soft roddy strong is bad at all but you’ve gotta love it

Word count: 2000+

I was used to the buzz at this point. I was used to the constant bright lights and travelling and staying in hotels instead of the comfort of my own bed. None of that changed when, six months ago, I started dating NXT’s North American Champion Roderick Strong. It had all started when he replied to one of my Instagram stories complimenting my appearance; we had followed each other for a long time. Ever since, we’ve been inseparable. We were what you would consider perfect, but there was only one downside to it.

We were a complete secret.

He had told none of his friends about our relationship. I thought it rather worried him that they wouldn’t trust that he had a girlfriend. I never told my friends either. It worried me that they might look at me differently for dating someone who worked for WWE. 

Roderick was heading out with some guys from work this evening, like usual I was staying over at his. He finished buttoning up his burgundy button-up shirt and turned to face me, a grin plastered across his rugged face. I couldn’t help but let out a blush ridden giggle. Slowly, I pulled myself to my feet and bounced up to him, unbuttoning the top button, and planted a soft kiss against his lips. “You’re so handsome.”

“Thanks baby girl.” He beamed in return. He shuffled his feet and looked down, sighing to himself. I gently lifted his chin with my index finger and looked up to him.

“Is everything okay?” I asked softly. He nodded his head quickly and gently took my hand in his, rubbing his thumb against my knuckles.

“Everything is fine!” he reassured me. Something seemed amiss with him. He was quieter than he usually was. Something was making him nervous. Suddenly his phone sent out a loud text tone, he glanced at it and quickly kissed me on the lips. “The guys are outside, I love you so much!”

“I love you too! Enjoy yourself,“ Without another word he headed out to the taxi. I peeped discretely out of the window as he joined his Undisputed Era buddies Adam Cole, Kyle O’Reilly and Bobby Fish in the back seats. I heard them all shouting happily from the upper floor of the house but something was bothering you. 

I spent the rest of the night watching TV, a few different things on our shared Netflix account. I also took a lot of time to think to myself. Why did it matter what everyone in my life thought about us? I was happy with him. Was he as happy as I am? Before I could overthink anything else my phone rang out. Glancing at the name that popped up, my face beamed when I saw it was my boyfriend. I immediately answered, holding it against my face. “Hey baby is everything o-”

I cut myself off. All I heard was the guys all chatting and the faint sound of music over the top of them. It was an accident, I couldn’t help but giggle to myself. That was until I heard a brash voice over the rest.

“Why are you acting all secretive?” Kyle spoke up. The other voice I noticed was Roderick stuttering over the top of him, trying to get his word in. “You didn’t tell us you had a girlfriend man, we want to know who she is!”

I froze on the other end. It was a huge step for him to mention it to his friends. It wasn’t anything I had expected to hear. I shuffled into my seat taking a moment to listen in a little further.

“I’m dating Kaia-” He slurred drunkly.

“No you aren’t!” Adam laughed over the top of him.

“I am!” Roderick argued back.

“Dude, come on. If you don’t actually have a girlfriend, you can just tell us. There’s no need to spread lies.”

“But I am dating her! I am!”

“Then prove it.” Bobby spoke up as well. I made out the sounds Roderick running his hands over his jeans, looking for his phone. Before I hung up I heard, “Bring her to the show on Wednesday! We want to see this!”

I hung up before Roderick had to chance to catch me out. I couldn’t believe what I had just listened to. Not that he wasn’t worried they wouldn’t believe he was in a relationship, it was that they wouldn’t believe he was in a relationship with me? It was getting later, but I stayed up a little longer just to see if I could catch Roderick when he came home. Eventually my tiredness got the better of me and I couldn’t help but fall asleep on the sofa. 

.・゜゜・

The next morning I woke up in bed. I looked around the room in a complete daze until I saw my boyfriend snoring loudly at my side. His arm was firmly around my body. I beamed at the sight of him, gently kissing his shoulder as I sat myself upwards. I could hear him stir, mumbling under his breath as his eyes slowly open to catch me in his line of sight,

“Morning Roddy.” I blushed, his hand met his head pretty quickly as he smiled painfully back to me.He grunted as he reached for his water on the side table. I giggled gently and ruffled his locks against my fingers. “Someone seemed to have partied way too hard.”

His chuckle sounded rough as he forced the full glass down his throat. 

“Do you want any breakfast?” I asked as I pulled myself to my feet. Out of the corner of my eye I could see him focusing on his phone. Shit. 

“Nah babe.” he replied. I sighed reluctantly to myself until he piped up again.

“Did I call you last night? Shit, I can’t remember.”

“Oh, yeah. It was just a butt dial.” I laughed. His smile vanished as he looked at me with a face of genuine concern. I could tell what he was questioning in his mind. What had she heard? I swallowed and returned myself behind him. Considering how close we both are I felt it was only fair to tell him. “I heard what the guys said about us.”

“You d-did?” he stammered. He slumped his face, a mix of worry and the hangover creeping further in. “I’m sorry Kaia I just-”

Without letting another word escape his mouth I swiftly pressed my finger against his lips. He looked to me with a raised eyebrow, expecting what I had to contribute.

“I’ll happily come to your show with you on Wednesday babe. I don’t want anyone to doubt you or us. Okay?” I said, moving my finger away. He nodded his head quickly and lowered my wrist.

“Are you sure you’re ready? This is such a huge jump for us.”

“Just make sure I have a good view of you in the ring.”

.・゜゜・

Wednesday rolled around, we headed towards the venue together. Full Sail Live was lit up brightly as the car park was swarming with staff, security and other NXT superstars. My fingers laced between Roderick’s, I kept my look casual with one of his Undisputed Era tees and a pair of sweatpants to go along with it. I tied my hair up in a ponytail, a smile painted on my face. Knots ran rampant in my stomach. A mix of a certain excitement brewed together with the fact that I was unbelievably nervous. Roderick, however, seemed more comfortable than ever at Full Sail. 

His hand stayed against the small of my back as he guided me through to the backstage area, we headed through a few hallways and both headed into the locker room. I recognised a few faces instantly. Adam Cole, Kyle O’Reilly and Bobby Fish were all sitting talking around a table at the far side of the room. As soon as we entered the room their heads snapped towards us. 

“Holy shit...” Kyle exclaimed to his peers. Adam’s jaw dropped while Bobby’s face was covered with a blank expression. Roderick went back to how I had noticed he was behaving over the past few times, shy and quiet. 

“H-hey guys...” he mumbled as he dropped his bags off to the side. 

“Hey Roddy...” Kyle replied. All three of them continued to stare at me in complete disbelief. Adam glanced to Roderick, raising his eyebrow.

“Well are you going to introduce us?”

“You guys know Kaia.” Roderick returned to my side, snaking his arm around my waist. I shot him a reassuring smile and traced my fingers across his muscular arm. “Kaia. This is Adam Cole, Kyle O’Reilly and Bobby Fish. My best friends and fellow Undisputed Era members.”

“It’s crazy not seeing you guys through a screen.” I chuckled. “I’m a fan.”

I pressed a kiss against Roderick’s cheek, resting a reassuring hand against his shoulder. Adam slammed his empty water bottle down on the table. I immediately turned my head to the loud sound. “Do you want me to go refill that? I could do with having a look around.”

“Yeah. That’d be great if you don’t mind.” He bluntly replied, his eyes stuck on Roderick. Questioning nothing I collected his bottle along with Kyle and Bobby’s once I had offered. I planted a quick kiss on Roderick’s cheek as I bounced out the room, the door closing behind me.

I headed along to the water fountain. The production staff rushed around by my sides while the other NXT Superstars seemed relaxed as ever. I hummed to myself, filling up the three bottles before I heard a harsh cough behind me. I assumed they directed it at someone else to start until they repeated it. My head snapped around, I was taken aback by who stood behind me. Dressed in all black ring gear, a smile crept across his mouth. “Well well, if it isn’t Kaia. What are you doing at Full Sail?”

“I could say the same to you Balor.” I smirked, my hands sitting against my hips. He then greeted me with a warm hug, giggling to himself.

“Long time no see!” It was true. I hadn’t seen Finn in a long time. We used to be quite well aquainted, so it was refreshing seeing a familiar face. I hugged him back with a smile before he piped up again. “No, seriously. Why are you here?”

“I’m just here with my boyfriend.” I replied, which lead to him pulling away. 

“Shit!” he exclaimed before cracking a dry joke. “It’s not someone who can kick my ass is it? Who is he?”

“God, you ask so many questions.” I laughed with a roll of my eyes. “I’ve been dating Roderick Strong for the past six months.”

“...Are you still telling jokes?” he questioned.

“What do you mean? Of course, I’m not?”

“Kaia. Let’s be serious here. You could do so much better than Roderick Strong. He’s such a push over and don’t get me started on the fact that he’s the North American Champion. When I came back to NXT, I thought they were giving it to him out of sympathy or something...”

I couldn’t process what I was hearing. I took a step back and let out a harsh breath. I could feel myself getting a little angrier. “Finn he worked fucking hard for that opportunity. What’s gotten into you? You’re never this disrespectful to other wrestlers!”

“I just don’t think highly of him at all. He’s where he is because of who he’s teaming with. Even you could see that. I thought you would’ve been dating better than Adam Cole’s lackey.”

“I’m sorry Finn, I am.” I started off. I could feel the rage build inside me a little. I started picking up the bottles as I let the rest of what I had to say out. “He’s done more for me than anyone will understand. I’ve never felt love like this before and God am I so happy and honoured to be his girlfriend. If you, or anyone else has a problem with that then please piss off and leave me alone.”

Finn scrunched his nose. A sign that he was put in his place. He glanced behind me before putting his hands up in surrender. “Fine, I just wanted you to know your worth...”

“Kaia?” A voice said behind me, a voice I could recognise. Soon a set of strong arms wrapped around my waist. I watched as Finn backed away, making his way back down the hall. I turned my head, thrilled to see the head of my boyfriend resting against me. “Are you all right? I could hear you yelling from the locker room.”

“I’m all right babe.” I sighed to myself, looking down to my feet. He twirled me around to face him, smiling at me with reassurance.

“I want to tell you something. If it wasn’t for you I don’t know if I’d continue having the confidence to keep coming here, to keep entertaining that crowd, to keep performing in that ring. I heard what you said to Finn, I get spoken about lile that quite a lot like that by some guys in here and it’s Adam or Kyle putting them in their place. To know you love me like that-“ he cut himself off with his smile. He couldn’t stop. I beamed, gazing at him as it overwhelmed me. My emotions were running high. I lifted his chin with my index finger as he gathered his words once more. “-it just means so much. I’m so lucky to have you. I just want to love you forever. You and me taking the world by storm.”

He leaned in gently, pressing his lips against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I kissed him back. My chest ached a little, something felt complete. I could feel tears trickle down my warm cheeks. He was the one who pulled away, instantly wiping my eyes with his t-shirt.

“I love you.” I whispered.

“I love you too.” He beamed, sitting his hand against my hip. “Now how does ringside seats sound?”

[steebrogurz]

Save Me (Part 4)

Summary: Bucky comes to your rescue during a fight with your boyfriend.

warnings: none

word count: 2294

a/n: thank you so much for reading my fics!! it means a lot to me and i hope you keep enjoying my fics. please reblog and tell me what you think

Bucky leaves me standing in the hall and I groan in frustration and shame then walked through the door locking it behind me. It’s a small bare room but the bed looks soft and that was all I need at the moment. 

I unzip Bucky’s jacket and I’m about to take it off when a knock sounds that the door startling me. “Who- who is it?” I ask while I know that Alex can’t hurt me while I’m here my heart still beats a little faster.

“It’s Steve.” there’s a pause. “I have a few things for you.” 

My curiosity outweighs my fear at the sound of his voice so I zip up the jacket again and unlock the door. Steve stands on the other side of the door holding my purse in one hand and a bundle of clothes in the other. 

“Your phone’s been ringing for the last hour and Bucky wanted me to give you these.” He holds both of them out to me with a warm smile and I thank him before closing the door again. 

I dump the clothes on the bed and dig into my purse for my phone to see that my sister had called me three times and texted at least 7 times. I don’t bother reading her texts right now instead I put my phone down on the bed and and inspect the pile of clothes Steve dropped off, a pair of black sweatpants and a grey t-shirt. Both are clearly made for men and I scoff at the image of Bucky going through his own clothes to find something to give to me.

I take off Bucky’s jacket and hang it on the back of a chair that sits in the corner of the room. The ripped remains of my own t shirt come off next and is thrown into the opposite corner of the room, but before I can put on the other shirt my phone begins to buzz. It's my sister again and of course she wants to FaceTime. 

I stare at the screen for a second trying to decide if I should just decline it and call her back. But she'll find out about everything eventually and we've always told each other everything, so I smile as best I can and answer the phone.

"Hi- oh my God!" I can see that she's already lying in bed but when she sees my face she bolts upright. "What happened?!"

I heave a shuddering breath, "Um, Alex happened. We had a fight this morning and then he attacked me earlier tonight." 

She turns and shakes her girlfriend awake talking about how she's going to come and stay with me. 

"No, Sarah. Sarah! I'm ok, I promise I'm safe." 

She stops and looks back at me with the most serious look on her face I've ever seen. "Did you kill him? Because you can't go to jail if it was self-defense. I know I live an hour away but I can come and help you hide the body, we'll be your alibi if we need to be."

Gratitude spreads through my chest and I smile at her. Leave to my dear sister to offer to help hide a body, that's always been our sibling relationship. We stuck together through everything and always had each other's backs. "No I didn't kill him, but thanks for offering to help get rid of him. And I'm actually not at home right now anyway." I turn myself around showing her the bare room.

"Oh. Ok well where are you then? Are you at a motel or something?" She squints and brings her phone closer to her face so that all I can see are her eyes and forehead, as if that would help her figure out where I am.

"I'm at the Avengers compound." A note of disbelief colours my tone. Saying it out loud to Sarah made it more real, and it was finally sinking in that I'll be sleeping in a building full of super heroes. 

"You're where?! You're with the Avengers? How did you manage that?" Sarah laughs and I start telling her about everything that happened today, starting with the pregnancy and ending with me yelling at Bucky. 

When I'm done talking both Sarah and her girlfriend, Rose, are staring at me through the phone with stunned expressions. And Rose is the one to break the silence. 

"I'm really sorry you went through that today. Alex is an asshole, and we're both happy that Bucky was there to help you." I nod thinking about everything he's done for me. 

"Speaking of Bucky," Sarah speaks up turning the phone towards her. "It sounds like he's got a crush on you." Rose nods in agreement and I gape at her words. 

"What?! No, he's just being nice and helping me. He's an Avenger! That's what he does." I protest, but my heart starts beating faster at the thought. Could he have a crush on me? I feel like I'm back in high school asking my friends if my crush like liked me and I roll my eyes at her. "Even if he did, I'm probably not going to want to date for a while after what happened today." They both nod in understanding. 

"By the way, what did you want to talk to be about? Steve said you've been calling my phone for the last hour." A blush creeps up my face when I use Steve Rogers's name so casually as if we'd been friends for years. Both Sarah and Rose grin into the phone and Sarah raises her left hand to show me a sparkling diamond ring on her ring finger. I gasp and all thoughts of earlier are chased away from my mind with excitement. "Oh my God! Rose it's beautiful! Congratulations I'm so happy for you!" My excitement wanes slightly when I think about needing a date for the wedding. 

“I know that look, Y/N. The wedding won’t be until next year so you’ll have plenty of time to find a date… or not. There’s no pressure for you to bring anyone at all.” Sarah shrugs and I shake my head at her. My very intuitive sister always knew what I was thinking, it got annoying sometimes.

“Yeah, tell that to mom,” I scoff. "Now that you're getting married I really need to step up my dating game if I'm ever gonna get her off my back."

“Well,” she says suggestively, drawing out the word. “You could always bring Bucky, I bet she’d love that.” She winks at me and Rose nudges her in the ribs. 

I bark and unamused laugh. “Alright, I’m gonna go but thanks for the suggestion that will definitely not be taken. Give Katie a kiss for me and congrats again. I love you.”

“Ok honey, we love you and we’re so glad that you’re safe. If you ever need to talk or need a place to stay I’m always here for you.” Sarah blows me a kiss and I wave at them both before hanging up. Talking with Sarah always made me feel better and the happiness of their engagement helped to keep my fear and anxiety at bay.

I toss my phone back onto the bed and put on the t-shirt and sweatpants. Both are at least three times too big and I have to roll the cuffs up multiple times to keep from tripping on them. I tie the hem of the shirt so that I don’t look like a child wearing her dad’s t-shirt careful not to make it too tight and I glance over at the jacket hanging on the chair. 

I could just give it back to him in the morning, that would be the appropriate, normal thing to do...but I should also apologize to him for yelling at him earlier. 

That’s what I tell myself to justify standing outside his door and knocking. This has nothing to do with the fact that I feel cold without him beside me, or that I strangely miss the way his gaze seems to pierce right into my soul. 

I wait for a couple minutes outside his door with no answer so assuming he’s either asleep and just doesn’t want to talk to me I turn back to my door, but just as I reach my room again his door opens. I look down at his jacket and step forward, thrusting it into his hands.

“I wanted to give this back to you. There might be some blood on it...sorry.” Bucky looks at the jacket and back up at me, I can see the smile in his eyes but not on his face. 

“Thanks, good night Y/N.” He goes to close his door again and I jump forward with my hand out to stop him.

“Wait!” When he pauses and turns his icy blue gaze on me again and my heart rate picks up. “I, um, also wanted to apologize for earlier. That wasn’t fair to you and I’m sorry. I just- there was a lot going on in my head and with everyone asking if I'm okay...I just didn’t know how to handle it-”

“I get it,” he cuts me off still watching me with those icy blue eyes. “You just went through something really scary, the last thing you need is someone telling you how to feel. I'm sorry too, I should've known better.” 

I nod and shudder at the thought of how he’s able to know how someone is feeling and what they need after a traumatic event. I take a deep breath trying to work up the courage to ask my next question.

“Can I- can I stay with you?” I ask, hoping he won't just close the door on me. He looks into my eyes and I silently plead with him, begging him to say yes, I don’t know if I’d be able to sleep otherwise, and I breathe a sigh of relief when he silently nods holding the door open for me to walk through. “Thank you.”

His room is almost exactly like the one I was set up in. The walls are bare, and a chair sits in the corner. The only difference is that the bed is bigger than mine but looks just as soft. What strikes me is the complete lack of personal items in the room and I turn to face Bucky. “Do you live here?”

He shakes his head. “No I have my own place, I just figured you’d be more comfortable here than at a stranger’s house.” He closes the door but stays where he is watching as I gingerly sit on the bed feeling the soft blanket beneath me. 

"Well I don't know if I'd call you a stranger anymore," I said looking up at him. He had his arms crossed over his chest. "I mean, you saved my life twice today. That bumps you up to at least aquaintance status." That smile I saw in his eyes earlier returns and spreads to the rest of his face as he chuckles and comes to sit on the bed beside me while still keeping a respectable distance.

"You're funny," he muses. "I like that." 

It sounds like he's got a crush on you. Sarah's words repeat in my head and I smile to myself. "I guess that's my coping mechanism." I must be feeling bold right now because the next thing out of my mouth surprises us both. "I talked to my sister about what happened today, and she seems to think that you 'have a crush on me'." I raised hands in air quotes to show they were her words and not mine. "Is that- I mean I told her that you were just helping me, 'cause, well, you're an Avenger, it's what you do. Right?" I take a deep breath to steady myself and calm my mind that's now panicking. 

Bucky just stares at me, which isn't helping, and opens his mouth as if to say something as he processes my rambling. Finally he sighs and smiles. "So first of all: I'm not an Avenger. I'm just a cybernetically enhanced guy trying his best to live a normal life. And second of all," he pauses and chews the inside of his lip leaving me to wait in agony for his next point. "Second of all: she's not wrong." 

Those three words hit me like a freight train and knocks the wind out of me. I wasn't expecting an answer like that, I was prepared for him to shake his head, tell me anything but that. Now I'm at a loss for words so we sit there staring at each other again waiting for the other to make the first move.

I briefly glance down at his lips, they look so soft and inviting and my mind goes blank except for one thought: Fuck he’s hot. I look back up to his eyes and my brain restarts, I blink a few times and turn away so I can think clearly. “I should- uh, I should go to sleep.” I crawl further onto the bed and slip under the covers facing away from him, and after a few seconds I feel the bed dip as Bucky gets in behind me. The bed is big enough to allow us to have our own space without the chance of wither of us accidentally touching the other, and I lie there with my eyes closed willing myself to sleep but the reality of Bucky lying there so close yet so far away keeps gnawing at the back of my mind and I wonder if I’ll actually be able to sleep.

tags: @oliviawestbay @doralupin01 @whatsupbucky

[jayankles]

Countdown

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 4277

Warnings: Implied smut, drinking, angst, fluff, character death

A/N - This is my entry for @therealdeanwinchester13 writing box challenge - I received the prompt: Write a story that involves a countdown. Start the story at 10 and end the story at 1

A/N 2 - Also shoutout to one of my best friend’s, Ty, who I don’t know the username of, but I know he’s stalking me and waiting for this. My dude, here you go.

Feedback is always welcome and appreciated :)

Ten years. Some would say that ten years was a long time, but not for a nineteen year old especially when you had your whole life ahead of you. You were stupid and naive. You knew that but you would sell your soul again in a heartbeat,especially when it was to save your family. They had all died, leaving you behind, survivors guilt you would have called it and it was, that was how you felt. You felt guilty for not dying, that you were the only one left. The stories you heard about making deals with crossroad demons had to be a myth but it was worth a shot. You had to try and save your family because in all honesty you couldn’t live alone.

You kissed the demon to seal the deal and it was done, your life would be over in ten years but you didn’t care, your family would learn to live without you. I know hypocritical, right?

The years rolled by and you felt even more guilt with each passing day, soon you would be leaving your family but what really got you was how close you all were after the accident had happened.

Your family had become solid unit, they became more greatful for what they have already rather than focusing on what they didn’t. They said their grace at the table, thankful for living another day, thanking God that they hadn’t died the day of the car crash. You nearly balled listening to them, you could barely keep it together, nearly blurting out that you only had half a decade until your death had come to pass.

With six years of your death sentence gone, you wasted no more of your life, if you had four more years left you were going to live your life to the fullest. Although you never finished school, you wanted to enjoy your life before you died. You went to a convention and met your favourite celebrity, oh yeah that would be what you take to the grave. You went skinny dipping, saw the northern lights, swam with dolphins, hugged a few seals, managed to learn enough Spanish to go to Barcelona and went to Disneyland in Florida. To others it may not seem much but it was everything on your bucket list completed.

What you didn’t anticipate was to fall in love with someone; that wasn’t supposed to happened, especially when you only had two years left.

You had come back from Florida and landed back in your hometown, you had three years left but had already got so much done. With your suitcases in tow, you made your way to the nearest bar, not bothering to go home just yet. Ordering a drink, you tucked your bags under the counter of the bar.

Nodding your thanks to the bartender, you sipped at the liquor, not wanting to down the whole thing. A tall, beautiful, green eyed man took a seat next to you. You were a goner as soon as you locked eyes and he gave you a boyish grin.

‘Boyfriend kick you out?’ He innocently inquired, glancing at your bags.

You laughed at him, throwing your head back, ‘that’s a great first sentence. You use that pick up line a lot?’

Green Eyes pouted before apologising, ‘I just assumed. Pretty girl like you, suitcases, and you’re alone drinking whiskey.’

‘I thought that was your way of asking me if I wanted to get outta here and forget out him, who you thought he was.’

He turned his body to face you, he leaned in, his breath hot on your neck, ‘we can if you want to.’

‘There’s one thing I wanna know though, before we do get outta here.’

‘Shoot, Princess.’

You pulled back, whispering in his own ear, ‘who’s name I’ll be screaming again and again.’ Biting his ear, you leant back in your seat, watching as his expression turn from shock to lust in a matter of seconds.

‘Dean, and you might be?’

You thought it over; would you give him a fake name and leave him in the morning where he couldn’t find you, or just give him your real name and add this night to your achieved goals that you didn’t know you wanted until now? ‘(Y/N), my name is (Y/N).’ You gave him a sweet smile and ducked your head.

Dean gripped your chin and tilted your head up, planting a quick kiss on your lips, not giving you enough time to respond as he just as quickly pulled away.

Once you downed your drink in one go, he grabbed your suitcases and lead you out to his car; a beautiful in its own right at that.

The black, retro, muscle car stood out against all the new, more modern, models of cars, yet they couldn’t compare to the prize that sat in front of you. ‘Wowza.’

‘Yeah, I know right.’

‘She’s freaking gorgeous!’ You exclaimed excitedly, sliding a hand over the hood of the chevy as Dean packed your suitcases in the trunk of his car.

‘How’d you know my Baby was a she?’

Shrugging, you answered, ‘eh, lucky guess. It definitely wasn’t the goo goo eyes you were making at her when we walked over here. Looks like I have a little competition, huh?’

‘Well Baby can keep me warm at night but I can’t snuggle with her in a bed now, can I?’

‘Wouldn’t have taken you for a snuggler, Dean.’ You had trouble keeping the smirk off your face.

Dean slammed the trunk shut and made his way over where you were still standing, wrapping his arms around your waist. ‘There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me, (Y/N).’

‘Uh huh, that would be because we just met, you dork.’

‘Guess we should get aquainted then get to know each other real good.’

With your arms around Dean’s neck, you pulled him closer, closing the distance between you, kissing his lips. ‘Let’s go then.’

It wasn’t a surprise that when you woke up Dean wasn’t there, his clothes weren’t where he had thrown them across the room. The sheets were cold but you didn’t expect any less, the only good thing about it was that the pillow still smelt like him; leather and – was that, gun powder?

Whatever it was, he smelt good.

You ripped the sheets from your body, not caring that you were naked; you were taking a shower. Surprisingly, the motel’s water pressure was heavenly, the strength of the water pelted again your skin, rinsing off the suds that clung to your body.

Half way through washing when a pair of arms wrapped around your torso, you squealed and turned in their arms, your arm swung up ready to throw a punch before you realised who it was and relaxed.

‘Dean. Don’t do that!’ You shouted, hitting his chest. ‘I thought you were gone.’

‘Couldn’t stay away from you, pretty girl.’

‘Such a sweet talker.’

‘Only for you.’ He grinned.

You nodded, ‘uh huh, how many women you said that to?’

Dean tipped his head forward, leaning his on your own, ‘women? Just you. Girls that didn’t stand a chance? none. But if it’s any consellation, this is the longest I’ve ever stay and to be honest I don’t wanna leave.’

He kissed the tip of your nose, his lips moving down your jaw, suckling at your neck. ‘I have a feeling that there is a but at the end of that sentence.’

‘I have to leave soon.’

‘And there it is.’

Dean shut off the water, carrying you back out into the bedroom.

He shrugged on his brown faded leather jacket, his mouth never left yours, his tongue licking over the roof of your mouth, swirling with yours.

Dean left not long after, no promises of seeing each other but left behind the best night of your life.

A couple months had passed and you were still adding things to your bucket list, ticking them off a lot more slower as you went. You still lived with your parents and siblings, wanting to spend as much time with them as humanly possible, they thought it was because of the car accident; they were both wrong and right. Close to midnight, it was time for bed the endogenous pacemakers inside you telling your body to shutdown and go to sleep. Getting changed into your pyjamas, you made your way to the bathroom and quickly brushed your teeth. Once spat out and rinsed, you buried yourself under the fluffy, warm quilt, sighing in contentment before closing your eyes.  Just as you were about to go into the depths of your dreams, your phone flashed alerting you of an incoming text message.  *Go to the window* 'What the hell?' You whispered, mostly to yourself. It was an unknown number. Groaning and whining, you tossed off the sheets with a small flick of your wrist.  You were shocked to say the least, you didn't expect the person on the other side of your window to be the guy you had been constantly on your mind, but there he was. 'Dean?' His brown hair was spiked, his green eyes still prominent in low lighting, the leather jacket he wore all those nights ago clung to his back, thrown over a grey tee and a green flannel shirt. He was still the same man from all those months ago, yet he looked like he had aged a few years. His shoulders were hunched like the whole world rested on his shoulders and maybe it did, it could have been a whole different world to yours but his body language said it all; he looked as if he was about to explode.  'Hey,' he whispered, barely able to hold eye contact.  'Hi.' You usher him in silently, sure not to make a lot of sound, hoping that no one in the house has heard a thing. Grabbing his hand, you lead him to your bed, sitting cross legged on top of it, waiting for him to talk.  Coughing to clear his throat, he talks 'I'm sorry.' He blurted out in a hushed tone.  'Why?' You laugh.  'I don't know. I text you in the middle of the night, and know where you live, I thought you'd think I was a stalker...or something.' You smirk at his uneasiness, 'nah, I think it's sweet. You went through all that trouble just for me.' Nonchalantly, you shrug like it's not a big deal, internally, you were freaking out. You had wanted to see him again but thought that it was just another one night stand for him, another notch under his belt. One and done. Love 'em and leave 'em. You get the gist. But why was he here now? 'Before I left, I - um - I got your phone number, I was hoping to see you again sooner but something happened. I ended up in the hospital and my dad died saving my life.' His voice broke at the last sentence, trying and failing to keep it together.  His head topped forward, trying to conceal the tears that were falling from his eyes. 'I didn't know where else to go.'  Wrapping your arms around his shoulders, you let him bury his head in the crook of your neck as you ran your fingers through his short locks. 'Shh, Dean. I'm here, okay, I'm right here. I'll stand by you.' With the awkward position you were in, you kept fidgeting, trying to get into a comfortable position, but to no avail. Dean noticed your constant movement and removed himself from your body. 'I'm sorry,' he sniffled, 'I'll go.' 'No, stay.' Shifting back on the bed, you got yourself under the covers and opened it up, waiting for Dean to slide in next to you.  Lying on your back, Dean rests his head upon your chest. 'Thank you' You kiss his forehead and snuggle into the mattress beneath you, and Dean on top of you, his full body weight a comfort to your chest, him curled into your smaller frame. Quiet muttering fell from his lips, inaudible ones at that, so you carded your fingers through his hair, humming a random, soothing tube that came straight to mind. 

Your parents had come to check on you in the morning, seeing what was taking so long, you were usually up before them. A hot cup of coffee in hand, while you read the newspaper and wrote in your journal. 

When you didn't show after two hours, they glanced at each other and shrugged, having their silent conversation. Maybe you were just having an off day, and did your usual but instead in your bedroom. They were stunned when you were wrapped around a man of your age. Dean's arm was around your back and his hand resting on your shoulder, pulling you down to him. Even in his sleep, he couldn't help but cling to you. Your father was going to lose it, he didn't want anyone near his baby girl, even if you were in your twenties. Your mother saw his rugged expression, and put a hand to his chest, effectively pushing him out the door and shutting it behind her.  Your father gave your mother a confused look but she only smiled, glancing back at the closed door. 'She loves him.' She simply said.  He replied through gritted teeth, 'how do you know?' 'I just do.' Your mother smiled, an grabbed your father's hand, pulling him back down the stairs to leave you be. She had never seen you cling onto someone in your sleep, you barely even did that when you were young. Sure you would snuggle against them every now and then but never clinging to them like they were your life line like now.  She couldn't have been more right. Even in the short amount of time you had known the broken man, you did love him and you couldn't help it. Even if you wouldn't admit it to yourself yet. 

Waking up, you found yourself in a tangle of limbs, your eyes fluttered open and were met with the most majestic yet sleepy green eyes. 

'Hey,' you whispered, your breath softly hitting his face. You smiled against his lips as he pressed them to yours sweetly.  'Hi,' he said back. 'You sleep okay?' Dean's smile softened, you could tell that you might have hit a nerve, maybe he thought you were treating him like a caged animal, one that didn't need to be talked down at. But then he surprised you. 'Yeah, it was nice, you know? Just to let something go. But I still feel guilty, that's not going away any time soon.' With the both of you on your sides, you had no where else to look but at each other. A crease was forming in his brow as you admired his godlike beauty, the crease in which you reached up and stroked your thumb over to get rid of. 'It's okay, you don't have to talk, thank you for sharing even that much. You barely even know me and I get the whole bottling shit up until you explode.' You mumbled a trust me under your breath before you asked Dean if he wanted some breakfast. He muttered a yeah, please into the pillowcase he buried his head into but you caught his muffled response. When you got downstairs, you noticed that your parents were acting strangely, a little stranger than usual. They were whispering to each other in hushed tones, looking and pointing at you. You continued to cook your breakfast a little more than usual due to Dean eating as well but you didn't want them to question it. That was a path you didn't want to go down, especially with your parents. You had finally had it when the whispered became a little louder and you heard an ask her from your father. 'What?! Just spit it out already!' Your parents were taken aback, you rarely ever lost your temper so they must have realised that they had pissed you off to a certain degree. You saw the not so subtle nudge your mother gave to your father. 'Who's the guy?' You blinked at his bluntness, but appreciated that he didn't beat around the bush. You quickly came up with something that wasn't completely a lie, but wasn't the entire truth either.  'He's a friend who needed someone to be there for him. Someone he loved died, then he got drunk and called me so I went to go meet him. He was too intoxicated and we were close so I brought him here. Is that all?'  When they nodded that they were done, you turned back to your scrambled eggs and waffles that nearly burned because you weren't paying attention. You quickly dished up two plates and put them in a tray, a coffee for each of you, syrup and whipped cream on the side.  Opening your bedroom door, you entered with a tray full, 'not to be alarmed or anything but my parents know your here-' Dean shot up at the mention of your parents, he was beginning to panic a little. 'How?' He interjected quickly. You sighed and told Dean to take the tray from you so you could sit cross legged in front of him the food in between the two of you as you bag an to eat. 'Not sure about that part but I just told them that you were a friend who got drunk and called me for assistance. Sorry.' He cupped your cheek and tilted your head to look at him. 'Hey, there's no need to apologise,' he leaned forward a piece of his waffle still in him mouth, still so fresh that you could taste it as he captured your lips with his; your lips curled against his own plump ones. 'So what's gonna happen now? Do you have to go back?' You asked as your eyes hovered looking over at his own, trying to get a read on what your future with him held.  That spell was broken as he closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against yours. 'I will do, my brother, he still needs me.' You could feel the tears gathering in your eyes, you didn't want to feel this way but Dean had a pull on you that no other man has had within the time space you had known him. 'I get it. I wish you could stay here but family is important, I know that.' But I'm selfish. 'And I want you to go to your brother. He needs you and you need him.' But I need you too. 'When do you have to leave?' 'Maybe tomorrow. I wanna spend time with you before I go.' 'Can you promise me something?' Dean doesn't do promises but he wants to hear what you have to say.  'What is it?' 'That you'll stick with your brother no matter what,' you sniffled. 'And that if you ever get the time you'll come visit me, even if it's just for a little while?' You know you were asking for way too much, that he shouldn't be promising to see you again when you've only spent two days in his company; not even that.  'I can promise to try. I'll try and come back to you, whenever I can and as for my little brother, I'll always be there for him. I'll do that. For you. For him. For me.' 'What do you wanna do today then?' You asked, trying to change the subject to a more positive note. He shrugged, 'it's up to you, s'your neighbourhood.' 'Well it depends, do you want adventure or relaxation?' You cocked your head to the side as you thought about what there was to do here.  'All about the relaxing now.' 'Okay, um, there's an arcade about three or four miles from here, then we could go out to a diner or have a picnic, if you want. Just a suggestion.' You rambled, scratching at your skin; a nervous habit.  Dean's hand covered yours and stopped you from tearing the skin on you hand apart, he smiled softly, easing your nerves.  'How 'bout we do all a those. Picnic first for lunch then go to the arcade, then to the diner for dinner. Maybe we can do something else too.' Without thinking to much into it, you automatically said, 'what would we do?' And then it clicked as he gave you a cheeky smirk, 'oh, ohh!' You giggled, 'yeah we should definitely do that.' He must have been satisfied with that as he his smirk turned into a grin, making his teeth more prominent, portraying his excitement for the day ahead. You continued to eat your breakfast in a comfortable silence, smiling at each other every now and then, looking forward to spending the day together in each other's company. When you were finished you got dressed casually; a tank top, knee length shorts, pair of sneakers, thankful for the warm weather, you completed the look with a blue plaid shirt.

Dean luckily bought an over night bag with some extra clothes that he changed into. He helped you pick out the food and drink to take with you - mostly consisting of junk food and beer - but you could live with it, especially when you only had a few years left. You eanted to enjoy life with him as much as you could.

Dean spent as much time as he could with you, he took care of his brother; so far he kept his promise and for that you were thankful.

It wasn’t until he had to leave for another unknown reason. You didn’t see him for another nine months, you were running out of time. It was dangerous to love Dean the way you did; it was selfish. If you became attached, you would only be hurting yourself in the end. You couldn’t help yourself. Every time you would give yourself a pep talk into pushing him away, he would flash you a smile, kiss you and make all reasonable thoughts drown in your mind. He left you breathless and wanting more, something that he never denied you.

He showed up bloody and bruised, you never knew what he did, but you never pried. It worried you to no end but still you tried your hardest to patch him up and stop the bleeding, doing as he instructed.

Another year passed, Dean came and went, his visits staggered but he was still trying. A few days until end of your ten year death sentence was nye. You thought you were going crazy, you heard scratching at the door and growling. When you looked through the peep hole, you didn’t see anything so shrugged it off and walked away.

This time, you called Dean to see if he was free to spend the next couple of days together, if you were to be happy, it was to be with him. That was your final wish that you quitely spoke to whoever was listening. Someone must have been gracious enough to grant you that as Dean accepted your invitation to spend a week together, just the two of you. You didn’t need a week though.

The growling and scratching became louder. When you asked Dean about it he said he hadn’t heard anything but as he was denying you accusations of the noises, they sounded again. They were more persistent this time, they scratched the bottom of the door off.

‘Oh no,’ your heart dropped, you finally realised what this meant, your time was over.

‘What?’ Dean asked from his position on the couch seeing that you had cowered into the corner, rocking back and forth clutching at your ears, attempting to block out the sound.

‘I’m sorry.’ You cried.

Dean was helpless as he saw the door swing open due to an invisible force. He couldn’t hear, nor see the monster that was after you, but when his senses caught up with him, he was too late. Marks  from the hell hound began to to drag down your torso, you fell on the floor, the hell hound ripping your skin to shreds. It was like the air was leaving your body but when Dean tried to help ypu and haul the invisible hound from your body, you were already spewing up blood, coughing on the fresh liquid, spurting over his face as his hands covered your wounds – the ones he could put a hold on anyway.

‘What did you do?’ His eyes searched your eyes, begging you to tell him what was going on but he didn’t know what to do, how to help you. It was beginning to be the end. He was scrutinising you, he knew that these would be your last moments together.

‘Accident...Ten...Demon deal...sorry...love you...’

Dean closed his eyes as he took in your disspersed words and pieced them together; you had sold your soul to save those that were in the accident. You had told him that you loved him. He did all he could think of to do, he pressed him lips to yours one last time The hell hound had torn your skin for the final time, your flesh torn apart, the light from your eyes was slowly dissipating until you took your last breath and the hell hound had left you to meet in hell.

10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1

120 years later…

‘Dean?’

Part 2? Let me know what you thought

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