#i got shit to say in private
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
finished arcane. no spoilers. something really lgbt happens
#even i was like#well that was pretty lgbt#maybe this really was our league of legends#come talk to me when y'all are done#i got shit to say in private#no wait im going to ao3 hold my fucking ginger ale i'm cooking dinner lads
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
Faggotry won again
#josh listens to#malevolent#jarthur#private eyes#malevolent spoilers#arthur lester#john doe#malevolent podcast#i HATE this (no i dont)#'i choose you' what the hell are we in grays anatomy or in a horror podcast?!?!?! JESUS CHRIST OKAY#two people repeatedly sacrificing themselves for the other and saying the gayest shit ever: we're friends :)#anywwy gotta still process all of this#glad weve got a john ep#and now they need to throw a human reveal party 😔🙏🏻#john is neither good or bad neither human or god hes himself and thats very nbcoded for him slay baby slay
63 notes
·
View notes
Text
imagine if westley rlly betrayed wander n sylvia n stayed in the hater empire jk jk unless
#hmmm how do i make him suffer more#hed live such a miserable life#idk i just like that “character gets all they wanted n then realizes it doesnt fulfill them” thing sm#imagine how getting special treatment n then being instantly demoted back to just private again after wander n sylvia escape would feel#im saying like cartoonishly instantly back#its like everyone forgot abt his stupid medal of evil n stuff its just all back to status quo except westley being less enthusiastic n#more n more hyperaware of all the brainwashing#which is actually funny asf cuz peepers n haters brainwasing n propaganda is so bad it only works on westley n maybe like 3 more watchdogs💀#if the watchdogs still have a home planet i like to think they have the craziest propaganda going on down there actually to the point#enrolling in the hater empire is a lot of watchpuppies' dream#its like our thing w every kid wanting to be an astronaut except its every watchpuppy wanting to serve the hater empire#which was def westley at some point#except bro somehow kept that enthusiasm going for 3 years of witnessing hater fuck up n peepers violate workers rights all day every day#wait nvm the propaganda might actually work rlly well considering the eye on the skullship n andys whole thing abt being absolutely#engrossed w haters whatabouts n shit despite never seeing him up close before#damnn imagine that#imagine their war machine evil empire being actually bad n not just silly cartoon aliens (its still just silly cartoon aliens)#this got long asf idk i just lkke#i wanted to say “i just like propaganda” idk how to phrase it right n not sound fucked up in the head#its all propaganda pro propaganda i have a feeling im not alone 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥#pbj
20 notes
·
View notes
Note
Oooh, definitely glee for the fandom asks! <3
Always with the hornets' nests with these ones, I see! Though i don't think there's a fandom out there that isn't in some way a hornets' nest once it gets large enough... hm. Alright. I'm just gonna be as honest as i can be about this, and tag accordingly.
Glee:
my favourite female character: augh. argh. ouph. so difficult. so hard. Since I'm working off of half-remembered show and half recently-rewatched show... its a tossup. Mercedes, Santana, Quinn. Probably Mercedes. She did nothing wrong ever in her entire life <3 well okay maybe except that one time she smashed kurt's car windows (but it was a banger song, though). Can't say Santana because of the Biphobia TM and other things like excessive use of bigotry-based insults, and Quinn. Oh god girl. Cheating is not cool! Funnily enough! So I find them really interesting but 'favourite' is hard to say. Mercedes. Mercedes for sure <3
my favourite male character: Blaine sam blaine sam blaine sam yes. I am imitating ripping petals off of flowers and coming to a conclusion based on which is the last name i said. So I guess that means Sam! But really this is a tie.
my favourite book/season/etc: Mannnnn idk. I don't like shows for seasons as-a-whole. Also i could not tell you what happened in any given season if you held a gun to my head. I'm not good at that. The only shows i know 'seasons' of are Buffy and Teen Wolf because i've watched them like 100000000000 times (exaggeration) for various reasons (mostly fanfiction research).
my favourite episode (if its a tv show): I can tell you my LEAST favourite episode (blame it on the alcohol, thank you Kurt king of biphobia! this is a persona foible it's not the worst episode in the show. by far. by far. it's kind of an average one. I'm just angry at it.) BUT er. Favourite? Idk. Genuinely some of the earlier Kurt-centric stuff was really well done (his convo with Burt... <3) and the Quinn giving birth accompanied by bohemian rhapsody was obviously iconic, but if I'll be honest I couldn't name any episodes of this show (other than That One previously stated, anyway). And yeah most of the time they were named after song titles and No i don't remember those song titles either. I'm just so bad at this. My memory is that of a goldfish's being haphazardly bounced around on a sieve.
my favourite cast member: it would be really funny if I said Demi Lovato [she counts!] but the truth is N/A: i don't know these people !!! They are strangers!! (i don't. follow celebrities. at all. I couldn't even name most of them. They're just people doing a job and their lives are irrelevant to me beyond their ability to perform that job well. I do not need to know where they live and what coffee they drink. Stalker shit tbh. I'm kind of a very private person myself, so rpf-adjacent stuff just... creeps me out. I've never watched a single cast interview in my lifetime and I'm not about to start!)
my favourite ship: Difficult to say! Grave and obvious lie. Blam. It's blam. Quintana is a close runner up though Santana really needs to stop dating people who cheat on the regular (I'll accept Quinn has grown enough not to do this by the time a Quintana coupling would be viable - and satisfying in terms of character arcs - narratively speaking).
a character I’d die defending: Blaine Anderson did something wrong for sure but like Kurt did it first so shrugs. Cancels out. Bad for each other! Case closed!
a character I just can’t sympathize with: genuinely don't remember if I had one of those the first time around because I was like 10 and just didn't pay attention if I didn't care, but Terri and her racist self take that 'prize' this time, alongside the obvious predator in the room [original choir teacher. Sandy? I forget his name immediately after hearing it. He doesn't deserve to be remembered]. Also JBI is just.... a yikes character all around. I mean, he's a blatant stereotype for one, in a the people who wrote this person don't like jews kind of way. Unfortunately common stereotype too, for the era, so not only is he that, he's also lazy. Just a one-note pervert who's the butt of various antisemitic 'jokes' you've heard from era-peer shows a million times over, tired and awful and a sour reminder of bigotry that continues to this day. Really regrettable character who's lack of redeeming qualities was probably purposeful. (I know Rachel and tina are also jewish, but this comes up very rarely and mostly only when santana needs to say something kind of fucked up, as is her modus operandi, for 'comic relief'. Tina's jewish-ness wasn't even canon for several seasons, because she didn't have a surname or a family or anything resembling complex character depth for several seasons. The one time I really remember Rachel's religion being important was when she was pressuring Kurt into believing in some kind of god, which??? don't do that. Bad example. Trying to guilt trip a friend into faith sucks. I take back what i said earlier Mercedes did that too. Boo. Girls try again that was a bad showing all around. Though i have no idea why Kurt went the acupuncture route as his 'secular' option but i think that has to do a lot with the writers doing literally no research ever once in their lives (you can tell they don't by the way they write the football segments of the show, which make no sense according to football fans who watch Glee, of which there are numerous because real life isn't like fiction where you can only like music or sports. Most of the kids in my school year were doing the most of everything ever if they were the 'popular' ones - we do that differently; popularity isn't really based on who know know; for some bizzare reason literally everyone knew who I was? Even people I'd never spoken to?? - but more about like... how much you can do, I guess. Overachievers, but I'm not saying that negatively; these people were generally - generally - very nice, and surprisingly chill for people who had no spare time whatsoever. I'm not entirely sure when they slept; A* across the board, at least one sport, at least one instrument, several extracurriculars, parties every weekend, dozens of friends and an s.o. . Eh? Way too much going on. Scary lifestyle! Impressive burnout rate, probably. Er. Tangent! Back to the scheduled programming).) There's uhhhh there's a lot of bad characters on the show, but i'd say Sandy and Terri and her equally but more loudly racist sister are truly completely irredeemable ones. Like they're not interesting or anything, they're just there to be narrative annoyances (which, in the case of Sandy specifically, is insane. Arrest that man!!! He has actively sexually assaulted minors!!!).
a character I grew to love: difficult to say because I tend to just make an opinion and stick to it. Also i don't remember who i liked at first and who i didn't, this show came out when i was eight. I didn't watch it until I was a little older than that, of course, but I frankly have spotty memory until my late teens, so! I'm not sure!! Quinn, probably. Pink-hair-era Quinn helped me understand her more, and seeing the moments of kindness hidden behind practical cruelty, when you understand her family and situation, makes things make a lot more sense. It takes a lot to get me to sympathise with a cheater, but I can see where Quinn was getting all turned around in her head about life because of her upbringing and socialisation, not to mention the profoundly negative impact cheerios had on her mentally and that the school's culture in general was not exactly a breeding ground for empathy and optimism.
my anti otp: can you tell (klaine). I don't dislike Kurt!!! Please let him have a fun chillaxed boyfriend in new york with his vogue friends. But also please stop attempting to control other people's diets thank you!! Thank you!! I'm of mixed feelings. Blaine and Kurt both did at least one bad, relationship-ending thing, and proved over and over again that they just weren't on the same wavelength in regards to life goals and ways of living it. They can't even share the same living space, which is kind of required for a functional marriage. I don't know, it just seems like they settled for their first proper, serious boyfriend even if that's not really the best match, and I... wish they'd just got to see more of life first, you know? They got married at like 20! Or something! I'm 23, I cannot imagine getting married at 20. That's a baby. Let them live first!
(same for Santana and Brittney, imo. I also don't really like them together because Santana and Brittney have very different ideas regarding monogamy, which is just never going to go down well in the long run. If your girl cheats on you like twenty times and tells you to your face its not cheating in her view of things, but you think it is, break up with her because you'll just make each other miserable. Brittney sort of seems incapable of feeling guilt but if she were, this kind of moral pressure would be Not Good, and obviously Santana isn't comfortable with the idea and doesn't have to be!! Just move on!!! Find other people!!!! Don't marry your first girlfriend if you've broken up like ten times this is simple!!!! Please!!!! But Klaine wins out over Brittana because - in my opinion, glee fandom please do not persecute me, I am known for this specific thing - I see... interactions that verge on abusive between Klaine that I don't see in Brittana. So. Oof? Ex; use of public perception to disguise attack; deliberately hurting Blaine in a stage-combat fencing match (you are not meant to make actual contact in these) and thus using Blaine's own dislike of making his difficulties common knowledge against him in order to 'punish' him. This is no good! Don't do this!!.[Also just to err vaguepost about a comment.... that is. not. what i would call passive aggressive. Physically attacking someone with a sword - no matter the type of sword, fencing foils hurt just as much, they're just not stab-you sharp... er, these days - is just straight-up aggressive.]).
Note that negative things stick in the mind better than positive ones; on a rewatch I may well alter my opinion!
But also I'm really, really stubborn. So it's not likely. Klaine.
#how the fuck do i tag this#glee#glee shite#ask game#anti-klaine#anti-brittana#anti-kurt#though it isn't because i do like him genuinely one of the better characters. he just... doesn't treat blaine great because they're#fundamentally incompatible romantically. and that's fine! but taking this out on each other isn't.#augh. i hate talking about controversial shit a;lksfja;slkf i used to get So Scared of anon hate mobs you have no idea#if i thought something could get that i simply would never ever not one even dare to think it. let alone say it online in a private forum#(dms with my friends) or god forbid a public post#so. this is growth!#you could say i just got a really weird form of catholic guilt about dissenting from public opinion when i was like 14. you'd also probably#be correct! As I was catholic. And all. Not very devout mind you (did not. go to church.) but still#anyways.#... there's so much i could say about brittany as a character but i'd have to rewatch to make sure i was being accurate about her.#so much that isn't exactly glowing commendation. to be clear.#augh. this show gives me so many very very mean thoughts about it. because it does things so very meanly most of the time#it handles beaste well. Coach Beaste is great. 11/10 character#but so much other stuff it gets just so wrong. just so wrong#(also i never finished the show. actually like genuinely i just missed a whole portion of it. so if they fuck up Beaste at some point I hav#not seen I'll be really really mad.)#(I found out about some of the later events-second hand. i don't 100% know how the brittana marriage goes down but i just... don't like it#as a concept. like at all. they're too young and too unstable for that shit.)#(basically; towards the end i was still watching the show on tv. so i missed whole swathes of episodes thanks to how tv works. do not miss#that headache!)#augh. i should shut up now and go to bed. midnight.)#<3 thanks for the ask! Hope i didn't say anything you disagree with too strongly...
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
instagram is such a loserish website. i post my photos for my friends to see and their feeds are so filled with sponsored reels and suggested posts that they probably don't want to see if they feel like i do about my sponsored reels and suggested posts. and then none of us see each other's posts, which we signed up to see and followed each other to share with each other. stupid stupid stupid.
#rubia speaks#no one has seen my last two posts now there. i am pioneering being a 0 note wonder across platforms#even half a year ago i'd get 7-10 likes on my stuff (and i'm a private account on main)#i don't believe people are seeing my posts suddenly and going 'actually. well. who give a shit' when they hadn't before#i really don't think they're getting shown to anyone because a photoset from a private account once in a while isn't#clickshit enough to keep people lingering on the site/app for an ungodly amount of time#following means nothing on instagram anymore#i'd like to say i'm above feeling annoyed that my pictures of a major craft project got no likes but i'm not#but i'm not mad at my friends. they've been supportive on the other platforms i have also posted the photos on#i just think the website has outlived its usefulness and posting there if you're not a content churner is pointless#i'll keep the account to keep up w the stories of a few friends but otherwise fuck's sake
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
I know I'm the freak that uses mobile for everything but it rly annoys me when people act uppity about how kids these days don't use desktop bc to be honest computer classes in school suck pretty bad and not everyone was allowed to have their own personal computer they could use at home lol
#i only figured out folders and stuff because specific classes i took in high school#i only got my first laptop when i was like 16 and it ran like shit#i had a family computer but my older brother basically only used it and i had limited access#ofc I'm gonna use the tiny computer that I can use privately whenever I want#im not saying computers are bad obviously but man not every kid got to do all that stuff
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
No bc how do u simultaneously ship chaipunk and chaiflower but then turn around and have an issue with punkflower bc of ages YOU MADE UP like
#no bc the whole age discourse is so stupid#like i got called a proshipper for liking punkflower when first of all I read comics#and second hobie literally has no age#like 3 different niggas from the movie said 3 different things#and me personally idc which interpretation u follow if ur a movie only#like for example I don’t like hobie getting sexualized bc I see him as 16 bc I read comics and he’s a teen there#but if u see him as 19 bc u saw the movie#I’ll privately think ur weird and all but I’m not gonna hold it against u bc u ONLY saw the movie#that’s ur frame of reference#and the three niggas diff opinions#were 16 19 or up to interpretation#which is why it gets me so pressed when niggas are like X director said 19#like yeah but Y director said 16 and Z director said u decide so what now#like i LOVE that ppl are ready to call out shit like that yknow#i just think this circumstance ain’t it bc it is literally based on u and how you’ve interacted with the media#everyone keeps comparing it to genshins traveler but even then everyone has the exact same information to go off of#thats not to be said in this case bc if I start talking about shit from the comics a movie only is gonna look at me crazy#and i don’t say movie only derogatorily btw it’s just a fact#no that pissed me off#AND WHEN I SAID I WASNT PROSHIP THEY SAID MY DEFENSIVENESS MADE IT TRUE LIKE BESOFR#anyways the weirdest part to me was that the movie DID imply something between gwen and hobie#like whether it was happening or not there was very much a basis for miles’ jealousy being set up#and if u rlly think hobie is that much older it’s weird to me idk#and i feel like a lot of y’all aren’t being honest and just wanna sexualize him#despite the whole pub things the common consensus is 19 which is like minimum to not make u look creepy#and if someone tried to ship hobie with an adult yall would KNOW it’s weird despite being in ur late 20s and making i wanna rude edits#and again that’s just private thoughts based on my interpretation which I know isn’t factual bc the creators literally can’t make up their#-minds#and PSA Im perfectly fine with being wrong if hobie is solidly confirmed to be an adult in the movie I just think there’s nothing solidly#for or against it as of now so fighting forreal over it is stupid. can’t wait till y’all ignore him again 😭
57 notes
·
View notes
Text
wwell…………………….finished it
#i knew what was coming……..I mean with niko…………….but it still hurts#not even like a death death it’s more like a Loss. like she should be there at the end with the rest of them but she’s Not#but whatever they’re setting up there????? ohhhhhhh it’s gonna be good#love that they kept her with the sprites honestly i like having their bitchy asses around#and the addition of jenny and the night nurse (charlie if charles gets his way) to the returning cast/to the agency is soooooo good#both of them are such a good example of the Forced Family trope. ie: well! looks like you’re family now whether you like it or not!#the night nurse. a powerful transdimensional being. as a begrudging aunt figure. GOOD shit#she’s gonna be soooooo exhausted by the teen romance drama going on at all times there’s so much potential there#imagine. charles and edwin having a Moment alone in the office. talking quietly and tenderly. and as they do they keep leaning in#a little closer… a little closer… 'I think… I might be able to say it now… edwin I–'#and there she is. standing in the doorway. 'for christ's sake– cant you kids do this somewhere private? some of us need to WORK here'#jenny's got similar potential on that front except shes less lecturey and more just. groans and walks away.#gahhhhhhhh i have so many thoughts theres so much potential graahhHHHHHH#kibumblabs#dead boy detectives#liveblogging
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
they should make a life where you don't have appointments, work, school and scheduled events every single day for months on end
#i just wanna spend like 2 full days rotting in bed is that too much to ask#december i'm going on a vacation with family + gf and we're trying to schedule a lunch/dinner so that we can go over the itinerery#and other stuff like my gf is diabetic so she's going to tell everyone the procedures in case of an emergency etc#and the soonest i'm available for that is oct 20th like bruh#every week day i've got classes 7:30-11:50 work 13:00-17:00 and then gym therapy or futsal practice at night#oh and sometimes the professor that i'm the student assistant (? monitor in pt) for wants me to go to her night classes#and then on weekends i've got futsal practice sat morning usually a match either saturday or sunday legal advice clinic 4x a semester#and then birthdays friend group meetups (with ppl i haven't properly seen in a WHILE so i don't wanna bail) family stuff or gf's family stu#oh and i take care of the finances of our futsal team so there's that as well#and then when i'm free i spend my time with my love (who i mostly see on either day of the weekend and sometimes for dinner on weekdays)#those are my favorite “appointments” i love spending time with her so much but even though we have quite a few staying in dates we also#pretty frequently go out to cafes restaurants parks meet up with mutual friends etc#so like... no bed rotting ever adfdsal#honestly i am not THAT busy compared to some ppl that i know#like i work from home most days of the week commute only 20 min to college am not a part of any study group etc etc#but man... that vyvense sure is working cause i do not think i would be able to do what i do now when my adhd was unmedicated#also i'm thinking of maybe getting a new internship next year cause even though i love my current one it's in public law which atm#is the field i'm thinking of getting into after school but getting into private law in brazil with only public law uni experience is#incredibly difficult. so i wanna be 100% sure i actually want public law. which means experiencing private law.#which means a private law internship#so i'm wondering how the fuck imma be able to pull that off next year#at least it pays much more than my current one! like probably double!#but honestly even with all the shit that i do and wishing i had more time for myself i've actually been so happy lately#i'm learning more at uni than i used to be able to i do pretty well at my internship i've got wonderful friends both old and new#my family is well and we get along like always i switched positions in futsal and am doing suprisingly good as a goalkeeper#and i'm in my first ever relationship. it's been almost 8 months till we made it official and it blows me away how good it's been#like we haven't faught once. disagreed on a couple things sure. but not a single fight and tbh even disagreements are very rare#idk we communicate and give each other grace and i just feel so loved. she knows me so well. i love her so so so so much.#like man just this saturday we were having an early dinner at a bakery. she stopped what she was saying and just stared at me smiling#and like i couldn't hold eye contact. cause she's so so fucking beautiful and she was looking at me with so much love and i had to look awa
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Maybe I'm getting a little tired at the joking homophobia that's rampant online
#even when it comes from gay people even when i know its a joke#channelcast made some art with the mesmerizer miku and teto just. holding hands. thats it.#and i saw like three variations of 'i have a slur to say' 'i know what you are'#like??? i think we got too comfortable making those jokes publicly and not amongst our private friend groups#*i* know we're joking. but what if it risks normalising it?#its all fun and games until an actual homophobe feels safe enough to say shit because everyone else can say it why cant they#its how we get people calling others fruity or the skittle squad. maybe it was funny at first but i know what some people really want to say#maybe im just grumpy because its possible i may have a sinus infection#maybe im just mad that my mucus is now deeply unpleasant to look at
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
It’s always crazy to see black celebs spew this same rhetoric because it’s such a privileged take… like, they’ve been famous for so long and have gotten their money up, moved out of the projects or whatever tf, that they’ve forgotten what it’s like to be genuinely feel. It’s impossible for them to connect anymore. As far as the qrt, oh wow ☠️.
#it’s always the same shit with these negros bro#like even recently with lil Wayne and all of these idiots crying about the Super Bowl and how he didn’t get chosen to perform#and you got idiots like Nicki and others going on about ‘taking opportunities away from a young black man-‘ (the nigga is in his 40’s bro)#despite Kendrick being younger…. and as a black person why not just be happy for another instead of trying to use race and guilt trip peopl#into caring about you over another black person when it’s convenient for you#because i remember when this dude used to say that he doesn’t care about blm or politics and he’s getting money#and that it doesn’t affect him so why should he care? now you’re crying about opportunities being taken away from you as a black man#I’m getting off topic but it’s the same sentiments similar to what Pharrell’s coon ass is saying#he’s always been one actually#rambling#whenever someone goes on about being apolitical they’re already not worth listening to#especially since politics shapes our entire lives like do you not care about what will happen to you#and what’s happening to people across the seas and in other countries like what is the real reason why sm ppl chose to play apolitical#I don’t want anyone around me if I can’t talk about politics with them or know where they stand as far as politics go#at the end of the day who cares about what a celeb has to say on politics since#I always go back to that one section in Dave Chappell standup (I know this was before he became what he is today… he was so normal back#then holy shit🗿) where he was taking about how ppl are super private about their politics and also#him going on about how ‘who tf cares about what ja rule thinks’#😭…. that’s literally it!!!#but to an extent it’s relalr dangerous to see ppl with such gigantic platforms and notoriety spew shit like this as if it’s normal#it only helps tp further push anti intellectualism and so on#like how are you an adult and you don’t care about politics#that’s embarrassing
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
i got an ask from a rayman fan and that made me really think about coming back to the community which i wont because i was absolutely fucking traumatized by all of you assholes and none of you respect me for being fictionkin and you all fucking harassed me and left me and forgot about me like i was nothing and also i think you all are vaguely selfship with me and that makes me want to fucking drive a knife through my skull
#thoughts#sorry this post is Abrasive and directed and sorry i still give a fuck about it#im still mad im still hurt and the most i got was some shit apology and then a twitter post saying Woopsie doo lol#and i think that got deleted#fuck grooming victims i guess#fuck me i guess because i did some things people dont likey on my private account#my private account#and then you showed that art to everyone and people i didnt know and you blew it up so sorry you got scared by my feelings#SORRY I SCARED YOU SORRY I LET YOU INTO MY PRIVATE ACCOUNT AND YOU SAW SOMETHING THAT WAS TWED AND CENSORED AND IT MADE YOU GO OHHH NO#SO YOU WANTED TKGO SHOW IT TO EVERYONE ELSE TO BOTHER THEM TOO#BREAK MY FUCKING BOUNDAIRES THATS OK#I WONT REMEMBER
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
sorry if ive made this exact post before i love metablogging when i have nothing else to say. funny that i gave myself permission to talk and express myself on my main account yet i continue to basically only talk in my personal blog rambling hole, i think i realized a while back that mostly its just my friends that care about my posts/interact with me so posting where theyre concentrated is i guess more efficient and less embarrassing
#getting over my attention seeking complexes?!?#well redirecting them in a way that makes more sense and causes me less stress ig#i wanted to revive this blog since i missed having a 'public face' but it turns out i dont have shit to say#i rarely draw and i dont often have lore im willing to publically share#i dont have any 'takes' that people other than me have said better#uhhh#media blogging has always been appealing to me but i dont think i like doing it either#again feeling like i dont have anything unique to say + my attachments to stuff are always really stupid and personal#i guess i just dont really feel like i need to have those expressed/validated online i got my own little world already#and im also not going to whine about my stupid life and daily routine here since#idk how to separate what people find illuminating/interesting vs whats just kind of whiny and doesnt even communicate much#again not worth it when i feel like im pretty satisfief with expressing/dealing with those things more privately#rambling... well enjoy
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have an intimate truth to share: I think Sunday would be a very cute name for a shoni baby who lives on a farm with her two moms. Sunday Shalifoe??? They could call her Sunny!! C’mon it writes itself!! And if she looked just like Shelby?? The material is there!! 😭😭😭
#also I think the idea of the B-side of the wilds (s3-4) taking place in the future and flashing back to the bunker and post-bunker times#would’ve been very interesting if like shoni are together living on a farm with their little baby having this happy private life only to be#dragged back into drama with the rest of the girls who maybe they haven’t seen or spoken to in sometime all because of Gretchen finally#being caught and them having to go to court and we learn through the flashbacks that shoni lost touch but reconnected some time after being#for real rescued and and flashbacks that go a little further back reveal that maybe Shelby kept quiet about something or helped Gretchen ge#away or simply as a reward for not saying something to the fbi back when they were rescued Gretchen gives Shelby Toni’s information which i#the whole catalyst and reason they were able to reconnect and it puts a big strain on their current relationship when it’s revealed cuz#Toni thot their reunion was one of genuine chance like the universe randomly bringing them back together but turns out that’s not true bc#Shelby clearly sought her out and then ofc through flashbacks that go all the way back to bunker times it’s revealed Shelby was working as#confederate which is just another thing she lied to Toni and the others about and right when you really think shits going sideways and thei#marriage is going to implode from all this there’s ANOTHER dramatic reveal which is like the real reasons behind Shelby agreeing to be a#confederate which probably have something to do with Martha and the court case or Toni’s mom or something in the vein and Toni realizes tha#Shelby did it for her/to protect her and then shoni is back on baybeee cuz that’s her baby mama frfr!!!!!#the wilds#long winded and full of holes but that’s all I got#toni shalifoe#goodfoe#shelby x toni#shoni#shelby goodkind#Toni x Shelby#shoni baby
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Now that I'm trying to turn my brain off from all of today's insanity to sleep I'm back on my usual mental schedule and oh my god. I Gotta write another alan/alice/barry fic I truly won't be at peace until I do it
#when I say they're always on my mind I mean it 😤#anyway I have One (1) post canon idea that's kinda old now but it's still. It's still good#tomorrow I've got class (private teacher + google meet) but maybe later... ? 👀👀#tani's personal shit#Nighttt
5 notes
·
View notes