#i got all my replies done!!! all of them are currently in the queue i'm so pleased

[floralifetime]

Toruk Makto's Sister

Warning: Very bad writing, some grammatical error (English is not my first language, so please be kind), mentions of racism, mentions of death, mentions of abandonment.

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⚠️⚠️Phrase and image are not mine, all credits to the owners.⚠️⚠️

Orange means Na'vi language.

Chapter n.6 The Tsahik

A king bows only to his queen.

Another Na'vi, decidedly more adult and important than those who had surrounded my brother, was the owner of the voice. She looked annoyed, her tail wagged quickly as she walked, I don't know if she was mad at us or the others given the reaction they had towards Jakey and mine. I lost myself in watching her for a couple of minutes, just as she made her way towards my brother and me. As that woman joined us, I lost myself in observing her around me too, more carefully than I ever did before. Neytiri didn't look concerned, like what seemed to be usual about her. However I noticed in them a hint of…Pain, perhaps? Is that what keeps them from getting the best idea of our race? What have we done?

“And who is this supposed to be?” my brother asks, whispering while I sigh again and look at him with a look that couldn't be more tired than his big mouth. “You told me to be still, not quiet!” he tries to be ironic and I can't help but agree with him. “Yeah, then please don't say anything stupid, okay? For the rest, stay still, is that clear?” I hiss at him, even though I've just realized that I've dug my own grave anyway having given him permission to speak anyway. “That is my mother, the one who interprets Eywa's will.” Neytiri introduces her, always with her composure but also with a hint of curiosity, I don't understand towards what or who. I nod and, clearly, my brother immediately had to make me regret my kind concession. “Who is Eywa?” he whispers, because he somehow understood that he will get less “punishments” if he only talks to me. I sigh heavily and look at him sideways, slowly turning my head towards him, still holding a calm and deep breath, otherwise I would have gotten angry with him again and I didn't have much strength to do it, I also lacked the desire, I wanted to keep my rage to “protect” both in case the Na'vi decide to attack. “Ok, I got it. Shut up, Jakey.” I hissed and he immediately understood that it was better not to mess with me.

Meanwhile the lady had joined us, she went around my brother, examining the tail, the queue, and the body in general. She seemed very rude towards him and I wondered if she would use the same bullying with me once she was done with Jakey. I can bear it, I've been through worse, but I wonder if little ones can do it and what he will think of me, an Avatar who carries little ones of clear Na'vi origin on her shoulders. What if she doesn't believe my story? They don't trust us, we must have done something really bad to get that much suspicion from them, so even my brother's word might not help our situation much…The only one who could calm things down in such circumstances would be Neytiri who didn't show the slightest sign of disturbance when I mentioned the children earlier, perhaps she had already seen me taking care of them then, or she had imagined that I would not hurt them. I don't know, but guessing is currently useless, I just have to take what comes and react accordingly, hoping that my words and my story are convincing enough for her. I also hope she doesn't ask me to deprive myself of the little ones, I already love them, I don't want to be separated from them, at least it's not the best thing for them but I know that I will suffer a lot in case.

“What's your names?” she asked suspiciously. “I'm Jake Sully.” my brother replied as he looked at her with a look too arrogant for my liking, a nudge from me got him to fix this, but it was disrespectful that he didn't bow his head when the Tsahik presented herself in front of him, which I had done. The woman nodded, she didn't seem to be offended or want to make a tragedy of the fact that Jakey didn't properly show the respect an important figure like hers deserves, I sighed relieved because we are in enough trouble even without her joining us too. The woman's cautious and suspicious eyes moved to me, she hadn't examined me yet, but I think she won't be long in doing so. “And what about you?” she asked me, with a slightly softer voice than the one used for my brother and a more good-natured look than the previous one. Perhaps she appreciates my showing respect in a way that she deems appropriate for her culture. Here we are in their home, showing respect and behaving as their culture wants is the minimum. I raised my arm slowly, bringing two fingers to my forehead and bending down, greeting the Tsahik as any other Na'vi would, no difference in manner or fluidity of movement. Sometimes I amaze myself how natural it is for me to behave like them. “Oel ngati kameie, Tsahik. My name is Y/N Sully. May I ask what your name is?” Tsahik smiled briefly, I don't know if she has ever smiled at a Dreamwalker, but from the astonished and incredulous reactions of the other Clan members, I can surmise that it never happened. “Mo'at, child. My name is Mo'at. Oel ngati kameie.” I bowed my head again. “That's a wonderful name, Tsahik. Your daughter has a beautiful name too.” I didn't fail to notice the smile briefly appearing on both of their faces, even though Neytiri isn't very close, I can still see her quite clearly. Mo'at pricked my brother with a sharp bone, then ran a finger over the wound and brought it to her lips. It's their way, they taste some of your blood so they can get a deeper opinion about you and whether they should trust you or not. From what I know it is something that only the Tsahik has the power to do, but I would not exclude that this method can also be taught to those who follow the training to become such, perhaps the best.

After checking my brother carefully, Mo'at approached me. She walked around me, carefully examining my hair, my tail, the queue at the end of my braid but she was much more delicate with me than my brother, probably in homage to the respect I showed her, also because she would have had no other reason to be so kind. “Can I see your wrist, kind and respectful girl?” she asked in a soft tone, more conciliatory and warm than the cold and slightly nervous one used towards my brother. The difference in treatment between my brother and me cannot be more accentuated than this. I just nod as I offer her my wrist, the wounded one. She doesn't sting me, she loosens the leaf slightly, takes a drop of blood with her finger and brings it to her lips. Not even a second later she opens her eyes wide in an expression mixed between admiration and amazement, quite the opposite as I look at her confused and worried, not so much for her opinion as for her health. “Are you okay, Tsahik?” I ask alarmed, the last thing I want is to cause suffering to any of them, despite being a member of the army, hurting is not something that drives me crazy, quite the contrary. Mo'at took a deep breath and then turned to her daughter. “Neytiri!” Her name was called with such urgency that I became more concerned for Tsahik's health. Her daughter was beside us in a hurry, looking at her mother knowingly, as if she expected to be called for the reason she thought, meanwhile I'm not understanding much. “Proceed too.” her mother invited her, Neytiri did the same thing Mo'at had done before her, her look when she tasted my blood showed more awareness than amazement.

“What do you feel?” her mother asked her, in a tone I couldn't describe and a look I couldn't decipher. “Brave heart, noble spirit, kind soul.” she make a list and I couldn't help but look down with a purple hue spreading across my cheeks, even reaching down to my ears and the base of my neck given how embarrassed I was. I don't know how long I remained in that position, but at a certain point I felt an elbow hit that forced me to raise my eyes, meeting the much more benevolent gaze of both Na'vi women. “She must be special…” Mo'at murmured. “I knew she would be up to it.” began, still calmly, Neytiri. “How did you know? You spoke of signals from the Great Mother, tell me one.” replies her mother, I don't dare interrupt and, thanks to the Great Mother, not even Jakey dares to say anything. “Utral Tirea interacted with her, the Atokirinas seemed attracted to this particular girl. Now do you all understand why I couldn't kill her and had to bring her here?” It seemed that every single Na'vi of the Clan had released as much air as their lungs could hold in a single instant. I looked around to check on the other Clan members, see if I could figure out what was going on. Disbelief was the feeling that was the most popular, but a touch of distrust and denial continued to be in the depths of their looks. Jakey always says that I'm good at reading other people's emotions, but I don't think it's true, even if I admit that I'm someone who observes a lot, there's no doubt about it. “Utral Tirea, that's not possible.” I turned to where the voice was coming from and noticed that it was Tsu'tey who had spoken, Neytiri stared at him as if she had interpreted his denial as a challenge. “And yet it happened. I saw it with my own eyes, even the Atokirinas are a sign of the Great Mother, clearer than these could not happen.” Neytiri replied firmly. “Atokirina? Utral Tirea react like this with a demon? One of those who have caused us so much suffering?! It is not possible! They are too pure for this scum!” Tsu'tey replied more and more furious, with the corner of my eye I noticed that my brother was quivering with anger towards this Na'vi, for the words he had addressed to me. “Why are you sacred and pure? But do me the favor! If you were, you wouldn't have talked to Y/N like that without even know her!” my brother retorted aloud, anticipating whatever Neytiri might want to say. Tsu'tey turned to him and hissed at him showing his fangs, Jakey reciprocated but, before the irreparable could happen, a voice was heard screaming. “SILENCE!”

It was Eytukan's voice, he had slipped between my brother and Tsu'tey, although it was clear that he didn't want to be in that place. “Your Tsahik hasn't finished examining the female demon yet! And if my daughter is telling the truth, the signs have been clear! Let your Tsahik finish the job she is doing and only then will we take a decision!” Mo'at wore a disappointed look as she stared at the man who, earlier, had led some kind of cavalry against me, Jakey, and the little ones. After a brief moment of silence where tension you could cut with a knife, what I had been waiting for happened. Both children, evidently exhausted by the amount of tension and psychological distress I was dealing with, burst into desperate tears. Hearing their cries all the Na'vi were alarmed, Mo'at moved my hair and immediately noticed the little ones crying. “I knew it would happen sooner or later. They have been too good at remaining silent and still until now.” I spoke through clenched teeth, turning to my brother who was already staring at me for directions, ears pulled back to try and escape the confusion caused by the children. “Come and give me a hand.” I wanted to smile but I was exhausted and couldn't. My brother approached me cautiously, while Mo'at and Neytiri watched him suspiciously, I don't know what they think he might do, but he would never harm children that small. “Check them and then pass them both to me, okay?” My brother nods and, after I hiss at him twice at his lack of delicacy, he carefully pulls out both male and female, and he passes them to me.

“Shhh…I know my loves, screams are bad.” I whispered while I cradled them both in my arms, the two little ones looked around frightened, they seemed to be looking for someone, they stopped looking around only when they saw me, guided by the purr I made to reassure them. "It's all right my little ones, you're safe." I said softly as I gently pressed them to me. The little girl, while she was looking at me, snuggled against my chest clutching my shirt and, listening to my purrs and feeling me kissing her forehead, she soon calmed down by herself, coming to emit only a few sporadic sounds, much calmer. Luckily for me the little girl seems to have a basic quiet disposition, so calming her crying doesn't seem to be difficult, which cannot be said of the little boy, who kept crying. I wanted to join in the cry too since the little one had wrapped her little tail around my injured wrist and held it tight. Having calmed the girl, I diverted my attention to the boy. “Awww, what about you baby? Why are you crying, are you scared?” A few strands of my hair fell forward and, swinging, enchanted the little one. “Do you like my hair, my little one?” The baby moved his little hands and arms, grabbing my locks and starting to play with it, my laughter helped calm the little one who also ran his little hands over my nose. “Everything is fine, my little ones. I'm here with you, it's all right.” I reassured them both, because even if I'm looking at the boy, I have to make the girl feel my attention too. The little one gave me a toothless, rubbery smile, laughing as I kissed his nose and wrapped his little tail around my wrist, squeezing it like he was worth his life. The girl draws my attention complaining about her, so I slowly turned towards her, also because the boy didn't want to leave my locks. “It's all right my baby.” I whispered to her tenderly. “Do you want a kiss too?” I asked her about her as I heard her moan, I smiled and lifted her slightly towards me, then kissed her face a couple of times, making her smile and giggle again.

Finally having calmed both babies I was able to lift my head to meet suspicious gaze but with a hint of tenderness of Mo'at, I looked at Neytiri and saw her staring at me with a much more tender and convinced look of my good intentions than the mother's . “I didn't kidnap them, if that's what you think.” I anticipated as I cuddled both babies. “Then where did you get them?” she asked me, looking at the little ones, probably she was trying to find any possible wounds or marks. “I found them in the forest, their crying led me to them. As you can see they are all painted.” I started by showing the boy who didn't moan if I moved him slightly for Tsahik to see, as opposed to the girl who moaned and cried if I tried to pull her slightly away from my chest. Mo'at looked at him carefully and her golden eyes widened at the sight of the paint that still smudges him, I hadn't had time to wash them and I didn't even think about it to be honest. “Even the girl has the same colors and shapes painted on her.” I explained as Mo'at moved closer to the baby to better observe him. “Can I hold him?” My eyes widened, I never expected her to ask permission, I thought she just took it. “Sure, here.” I smiled and handed her the little one who didn't seem very happy with the change, he moved confusedly and looked around disoriented, whimpering. Contrary to what I expected Mo'at smiled and waved me over. I did it and as soon as the little one saw me he smiled and calmed down and stretched out his little hand to touch me, I smiled, I stretched out my free hand and let him take my fingers, I sighed moved by his toothless smile.

While the little one was distracted by my fingers and playing with it, Mo'at examined him carefully for a couple of minutes. “Can you confirm that the marks on the boy are the same as those on the girl?” she asked me. “Sure, they're the same, I have a feeling they don't mean anything right, it's that true?” Mo'at looked at me for a couple of seconds, then exchanged glances with her daughter and spoke again. “Do you care and take care of two children who are not even of your species?” I looked at her strange. “Of course I do, why shouldn't I?” I asked her without quite understanding what she was getting at, I don't know if she's being serious or if she's bluffing to test my intentions but I don't really want to think about it. “What should I have done, in your opinion? Leave them both where I found them and walk away ignoring that they needed someone to take care of them?” I insist. “We both know that if I had turned my back on them they would never have survived, both from predators and from the temperature of the forest at night. They are too young to stand a whole night in the forest.” Tsahik moved her ear slightly, letting me know that she was listening to me much more attentively than I expected. “Why should these innocent children die, who have done nothing wrong? It doesn't matter what species they are or I am, anyone would have done it in my shoes, even you. And you know very well that it is.” I conclude, I don't reveal what I really feel, that is slightly offended that Mo'at even thought about the possibility of abandonment, I would never do it. Despite this, I can't help wondering the reason behind this insinuation of hers. “And if I told you that these children have a family here and that it is better that they grow up with them, what would you tell me?” I swallow hard, trying everything not to cry. The eventuality I feared had presented itself, the little ones have another family and I would have to give them back, I don't want to do it but the doubt eats me up. Would I really be able to raise them? What's best for them? Is what's best for them the same as what's best for me? If they really have family, why didn't I see anyone when I found them?

I feel a hand on my shoulder that makes me turn, making me see my brother who smiles at me. “If they really had a family they would have already recognized and claimed them, don't you think? I think she's lying to test you.” my brother whispers. I look at the little girl who is still curled up against my chest and I can't think of giving up on her, I look at the little boy who is still playing with my fingers and I can't think of giving up on him either, but what would be the right thing for them to do? “If their family is willing to take good care of them I can consider leaving the babies to them, but what about their lack of attention in the forest? If they were a family worthy of the name, they would have rescued the little ones.” I start. “They may not have heard them.” she replies. “Don't lie to me, we both know how loud babies are capable of crying, at least if they were here I don't see why they shouldn't have heard them.” I answer back. “If it was really the best for them, I might as well do it. But I have to be sure, aware that they will take care of the little ones in the best way. Let me express my doubts given how they behaved and how they left them in the forest.” I don't leave her time to speak. “Because there's no way I'm leaving the little ones in the hands of whoever left them there, since we both know that the little ones didn't come alone in the middle of the forest. Someone brought them there, and who could it be but a family member? They are so small, there are still purple parts near their fingers.” I say, pointing to the purple halos present near the little one's fingers. “That said, I have no intention of leaving them in danger. They drew an archery target on their chests, I don't think it's a mistake, it was done on purpose.” I sighed. “I'll keep them with me, at least I won't abandon them in the forest. Please let me take care of them, I love them already.” I conclude. Mo'at smiled and allowed me to pick up the boy again. Having done this, she moved away from me slightly and began to speak in a serious and peremptory tone, addressing the entire Clan, while Neytiri approached me, I don't know why.

“These children were abandoned by their parents, they would have died of cold and hunger if it hadn't been for the kindness and courage of this Dreamwalker! Observe and learn because here among us there is someone who dared to commit the worst sin against their children, of the gifts that the Great Mother has entrusted to these two parents. Learn from her, who didn't leave them in the forest to die of starvation, despite the fact that they are children that don't belong to her and are of totally different species from hers, for her this difference doesn't matter because she loves these children as if they belonged to her! She proved herself better than theirs parents and better than us who didn't realize the tragedy that was about to unfold under our noses!” she turned to me, who was kissing the boy's cheeks, holding the girl close to me, and beckoned me to approach her. Unsure, I looked around as Neytiri waved me over to her mother. Still uncertain, I approached Mo'at, not knowing what she had in mind and what to do. “Children deserve to grow up with those who love them and it is clear that you love them, the little ones will stay with you!” I smiled moved. “Irayo, I don't know what else to say except…Irayo.” I hugged the little ones to me, happy that they would remain under my care. “Don't thank me, I didn't do anything relevant. You did everything, you and the love you feel for your little ones.” I bowed my head respectfully and walked back to my brother who was smiling contentedly, I noticed Neytiri was smiling too. “Jakey, did you see? They will stay with me!” I cheer happily as he widens his smile further and kisses my forehead. “Yes, these little guys are lucky, nobody loves them more than you.” I nod and look around, noticing Neytiri staring at me as if she wants to get closer but she can't, I don't know why she hesitated so much, I don't understand why she's undecided, she has shown that she isn't afraid to say or do what comes to her mind.

“Neytiri!” I called her and her ears moved, she heard me and she was listening. “Come here, come and see them.” I invited her, she looked around for a second and then approached me cautiously, as if she didn't want to scare the children. I took a couple of steps towards her, so we met halfway. I moved my arm slightly where I was holding the boy, he moved his ears constantly to listen to all the noises around us, while the female didn't seem at all interested in anything that surrounded us, it seemed as if it was enough for her to be safe among the my arms, as if she wanted nothing else. “This here is the boy.” I said to her as I saw her bend down a bit to have a better look at him. The little one, for his part, smiled and cooed happily. “He's already a talkative one.” I smiled as Neytiri stroked his face, letting him grab her finger. “And also very strong. He could make an excellent warrior or an extraordinary hunter.” she said looking at me. “You have nothing against it?” she asked me. “No, he can become whatever he wants, I'm sure Eywa will have chosen the most suitable path for him.” I smiled kissing the baby's forehead. “I trust her.” I say and see her smile, she seems to be happy with what I said. “And this is the girl.” I told her, showing her the little girl who had moved her ear slightly, showing that she had heard us. “She seems to be more calm and reserved than her little brother.” I smiled as Neytiri gently ran a finger over the little girl's black tufts, they both smiled as the little girl turned her little head to look for me. “She look for her mom, the one who gives her unconditional love.” Neytiri smiled while I couldn't hold back a happy, relieved smile.

“Fixed this problem, tell us why you came here.” Mo'at's voice interrupts mine and my brother's celebreations and the happy moment shared with her daughter. We turn around and Jakey seems to have forgotten the warning I gave him earlier. “Oh, we are here to learn.” my brother replies. “We already tried to teach some human beings, it didn't go well. It's hard to fill a cup that's already full.” she affirmed with a hint of disappointment and resignation in her tone and look. “Trust me, my cup is totally empty.” my brother jokes and I just can't help but giggle. “It's true, yours is filled only with air.” I smiled as he looked at me in mock offense. “Why are you looking at me so badly, it's true!” I say laughing. “In addition to being full of air, it is also hard!” I finish as Jakey tugs at my hair, giggling too. “Lucky for us yours isn't like that!” he says. “You're joking I hope! If my cup was like yours, we'd all be dead by now!” we both laughed and not even Mo'at or Neytiri could keep from smiling or snorting lightly. “Maybe her cup isn't quite empty.” smiled my brother pointing to me. I looked at him as if he was crazy. “What? It is not true!” I immediately denied, I'm far from having the “cup full” as they say. “But yes, it's you who can speak their language, you proved it. It is you who know how to behave towards their most important figures, you have proved it. In any case, you know how to deal with them, their traditions, their rites, you know these things.” he began to say. “It's not true and anyway, even if it was, I'm far from knowing everything as she means and as you think.” I explain. “It wouldn't hurt to learn a little more and enrich my mind. Fill my cup further.” I conclude, looking at him with what should be a raised eyebrow, in the human body it would be. “Would you be willing?” Tsahik's voice interrupted both of us. “What?" I asked her, confused, not so much about what she said as about what she meant. “He is right.” she begins, pointing to my brother who was looking at me triumphantly, he loves to be right. “You have shown that you know much more than he does. Would you be willing to increase your knowledge? If any of us taught you, would you be willing to learn?” she asks me. “Sure, I would really like to be honest.” I smile as Mo'at nodded and turned to my brother.

“What are you?” she asked looking at Jakey. “We are all warriors, of Clan Jarhead.” I turned to him, obviously he had to say his nonsense, otherwise he's not happy. I was afraid this statement from him might cause him trouble, so I approached him. "Warrior? Ah! I can kill him easily!” Indeed, exactly the result I expected. I recognized the voice, it was Tsu'tey's, who hadn't spoken yet since Neytiri described what had prompted her to bring Jakey and me here. I took self-defense courses, both at due to the will of of my older brother and because I felt safer knowing some tricks to defend myself in unpleasant situations, which I happened to find myself in several times. I quickly place myself between Tsu'tey and my brother, knocking the Na'vi warrior to the ground by sweeping both of his legs off. I was quick enough to surprise him, as he fell on his back like a sack of potatoes, yellow eyes wide and an incredulous expression on his face, I had to use all my strength not to laugh, embarrassing him more. “I rarely pull such drastic maneuvers, so I don't think you'll see any more for a while, but I can't let you threaten Jakey. Have I been clear?” I spoke using a firm but at the same time sweet tone, like that of a mother who scolds her son for a not too serious problem. He remained silent, while I leaned towards the little girl to kiss her cheek, hearing her giggle. Everyone around me seemed to move in slow motion, with bated breath, I don't know who he is, if he had led the warriors when I arrived he must have some importance within the Clan, however I don't care. As with Eytukan, if you don't deserve my respect you won't get it. I'm kind not stupid.

“If you stay silence we don't get along my friend.” I smiled as he scrambled to his feet, not expecting to be knocked down by a Dreamwalker, that's for sure. “I'm not your friend!” he yelled in my face. “Hey, take it easy! You are nobody to threaten Jakey, I don't care who you are! Respect and you will have respect back!” Before Tsu'tey could answer, another voice caught our attention. “Stop!” it was Eytukan, and I haven't heard him speak for quite a while. “They are the first Dreamwalkers of their…Kind, that we know, we need more information.” I smiled and walked towards my brother who smiled. “Maybe I should have warned you before she did it, but there's no point in provoking her.” Tsu'tey answered him by hissing at him. “Fine, the decision is made.” this is the voice of Mo'at, taking a step towards her daughter. “My daughter, you will teach the boy. You will teach him how to walk and talk like us.” Neytiri was not happy with this part of the decision. “But why me? It's not right!” she moaned. “You brought them here, you will help educate them.” her mother replied, firm. “I would have preferred to take care of the girl.” she continued to moan. “Tsu'tey will take care of her.” her mother froze her, and Tsu'tey and I also froze in place. “Me?! And why should I teach something that can't be learned to someone who can't learn!?” he protested vehemently. “I said the decision is made!” Mo'at raised her voice slightly as I rocked the children so they wouldn't get scared. “You, my daughter, will teach Jakesully, while you, my brother, will teach Y/Nsully. Neytiri you will also teach to walk and talk like us, Tsu'tey, you can do without teaching our language, she seems to already be able to speak it. Learns well, Jakesully and maybe your insanity can be cured.” her eyes sought mine. “I can already tell that you will do well, Y/N.” she smiles kindly. “Thank you very much, Tsahik.” I nod. “As for you, Tsu'tey.” her gaze returns to the warrior, and she approaches and whispers something to him that I can not hear.

After helping me put the babies back in their carriers, Neytiri and Tsu'tey accompanied us and guided us to a healing tent. “Well, who comes in to help her? You or me?” she asks once we reach the tent entrance. “It's up to you, I can't bear to start being with her so soon.” spits Tsu'tey, with much poison ill-concealed in his words, a snake is less poisonous than him. “Okay, but you're not doing well.” Neytiri retorts, Tsu'tey rolls his eyes as Neytiri escorts me inside the tent. “Behave yourself, Jakey!” I tell him as I enter. Once inside, she and I remained alone in comfortable silence while she treated my wounds, at least comfortable silence until I asked her questions about the herbs she used and the method of use, already showing my boundless curiosity and desire to learn. I wonder why Mo'at assigned me to Tsu'tey and not Neytiri who seems more enthusiastic about me than my brother.

Once out we went back to Jakey and Tsu'tey, the former was happy to see us the second not much, on the contrary, he probably would have preferred to see only Neytiri. To be honest I'm sorry he feel that way about us but I can't tolerate my brother being so openly threatened I couldn't do anything for Tommy, for Jakey I must be able to do something or else what kind of sister am I? I hope that the conception of me will improve over time, after all I'm not here to be despised, but to learn a culture that I think is fascinating and capable of teaching a lot to those who are willing and courageous to question themselves and learn it. “Now we take you to another tent where you can change into more suitable clothes.” Neytiri communicated as Jakey placed the last kiss on my head. "Alright. Irayo.” I smiled, I noticed a strange look in Tsu'tey, as if he was about to make fun of me but was interrupted right on the best by something done too correctly to be resumed.

The walk was very silent on my part at least, not so much on Jakey's part since I had to call him constantly, he stopped often and willingly, or embarrassed both me and himself, I would have preferred to know him in silence. “Here we are, decide who enters first. If you need a hand with the little ones, I can come in with you.” once again it is Neytiri who gives us a minimum of indications. “Doesn't it bother you to help me?” I ask, she shrugs. “No, it must be complicated with two such young children.” I nod. “Yes, I would like.” I smile even if I hear Tsu'tey snort. “What is it Tsu'tey? Do you want to keep the little ones?” he widened his eyes and looked at the smiley faces on my shoulders, you could tell he didn't know where to start. “Obviously.” I conclude as both me and Neytiri, who was smiling, enter the tent. I took off the carrier and set it down on the floor, kneeling in front of my babies, smiling and playing with both of them as Neytiri gathered a couple of dresses to give me. “Here, these are for you.” she said handing me some simple but very nice clothes, with some light decorations superbly drawn on the fabric of both the thong and the top. “They don't belong to anyone?” I asked, just to be completely sure I wasn't stealing anything. “No.” she just answered. “The decors are very nice, I didn't think there would be.” I think out loud and her eyes widen. “Do you already know that the most decorated clothes are worn by the most important members?” she asks me, amazed. “Yes, I thought being an apprentice would not give me access to the beautiful clothes you wear.” I nod as I take the clothes from her hands and look at them more closely. “You are a peculiar apprentice, the Great Mother seems to have taken a liking to you, so I thought you might wear a couple of decorations.” she explains while I nod and look at them without quite understanding how to wear them. “Uhm…Would you give me a hand?” I ask her embarrassed, she smiles and approaches. She helps me take off my human clothes and put on the typical Na'vi clothes. “Irayo, I didn't think I could hope for such kindness.” I smile as I let the children look at their mother's new clothes. “Huh? Neytiri did a great job, what do you think?” I asked as I lifted them one by one, making them both laugh. “Come on, Tsu'tey and your brother are waiting for us. And Tsu'tey doesn't have much patience.” she smiles, I put the carrier on my shoulders and we go out. Again Jakey fills me with affection and compliments when he sees me with the new clothes, then it's his turn and his loincloth has no decoration like mine, Tsu'tey must have respected the custom to the letter, in fact he glared at Neytiri when he noticed that my clothes were decorated, albeit slightly. “Everyone must be having dinner by now, let's go.” Tsu'tey cuts short, and we set off.

Once we arrived we realized that Tsu'tey was right and everyone was eating in more or less large groups, all seated in a circular manner. Tsu'tey starts off without saying anything while Neytiri motions us to follow her and sit down with them. Jakey, as we walk, has to apologize several times because he steps on almost every tail he comes across. Finally we can sit down and thank goodness I am provided with two baby bottles made of leaves to be able to feed the little ones so I can sit quietly and feed them while my brother tries to talk to Neytiri without her being very happy with the interaction.

“Excuse me?” I hear myself called and I turn towards the direction from which the little voice is coming, finding myself in front of a little girl but still bigger than my two little ones. I smile at her softly “Hi baby, can I help you?” I ask inviting her to sit next to me. The girl accepts and sits down. “Yes, well…I wanted to know…” she looks doubtful and embarrassed, I smile at her hoping to encourage her. “Don't be afraid, honey.” I encourage her. “Here, I wanted to know if you and him.” points to my brother. “Are mates. And if they are your children.” My eyes widen, the children evidently not being allowed to attend the huge assembly that was called upon our arrival, and Jakey turns around with a shocked face. “Um…No, darling, we're not mates.” I smile and reach out to stroke her cheek, the little one leans into my touch. “He and I are brother and sister. He is a year older than me, while the little ones here I found alone in the forest and I took them with me because I couldn't leave them there.” she nods in concentration and my brother has to say something of his. “I love her, but not like this.” I snort smiling and my expression makes the little girl laugh. “Irayo!” she says out of nowhere and I look at her confused. “Why irayo, honey?” she looks at me with a toothy smile. “Because everyone say Dreamwalkers aren't nice, but you are!” she nods convinced and I smile at her innocence. “Sure honey, but I'll tell you a secret. There are Dreamwalkers who are kind and good. We are not all the same.” I say tenderly tapping a finger on her nose, she giggles cheerfully covering it. “Are you rare?” she asked me in the tone of someone who has discovered a beautiful treasure. I reflect, I don't know what to answer. If I told her a lie, I could expose her to dangers, if I told her the truth…Well, I don't want to disturb her innocence as a child, all little ones need to believe in the magic and goodness of the world, it's reassuring. It is for this reason that explaining evil and its existence to them is not easy at all. I'm in the military, safety first. “Yes, little one. Unfortunately we are quite rare.” I nod. “But you know what? This makes you even luckier, because you know not just one good Dreamwalker, but two! Me and my brother.” the little girl smiles and, before she can say anything else, she is called back by a little boy, I think he is her older brother. “Thank you for answering me. Have a nice dinner and have a good rest!” I greet her in their own way and she happily reciprocates and then runs to join her older brother. I smile gently as I watch her walk away, she's a lovely little girl.

“You were kind.” I hear someone talking next to me, I turn to notice that Tsu'tey was looking at me with a twinkle in his eyes that I can't decipher, as I kiss the forehead of the little boy in my arms. “It's not my habit to be aggressive.” I nod as he looks at me with a gleam of amusement behind that hard, angry gaze. “Except when you knocked me down.” he reminds me and I can't help but giggle. “Well, you threatened my brother.” I say like it's the most obvious thing in the world, and to me it is. He nods and the conversation ends there for him, I don't want to push him, he's already talked to me for a long time, before returning his attention to my little ones, I look at him briefly and he seems immersed in distant thoughts, in distant memories.

After dinner Neytiri and Tsu'tey took us to the area where we would sleep, the same one where they all sleep. After that brief interaction during dinner Tsu'tey stopped speaking and returned to being aggressive as he had done before. “Should we climb up there?” asks my scandalized brother. “Sure, and we should wake up early. Na'vi's life generally begins early, and more so if the Na'vi in question are warriors or hunters." my brother looks at me shocked. “Need a hand with the kids?” Neytiri asks me, I look briefly at Tsu'tey and see that he doesn't roll his eyes or sigh heavily. “Is everything all right, Tsu'tey?” I ask him worried. “No, I'm fine.” cut him short. “I don't believe you, but I don't insist.” I smile and then turn my gaze towards Neytiri who was waiting for her answer. “Sorry, no irayo. I can do it." I smile at her, she nods but, just to be safe, she waits for me to settle down. After I've taken the babies out of the carrier and tied it to the end of the bed, I lay down on my side, holding both little one close to me. “Good night brother.” I greet him as I hear him settling into his bed, not far from mine. "Good night little sister.” he reciprocates and I kiss the babies foreheads, humming a lullaby to them, before drifting off into dreamland, ready to return to my actual body.

Well, this is the end of the sixth chapter✨…I know, it's as long as few, but I couldn't narrow it down more than that if I wanted to insert all my ideas into it, sorry😅. In any case, thanks for reading in case you did and, if you want, we'll see you in the next chapter, number 7👋.

©️Floralifetime May 10-2023, please do not republish, repost, steal, modify, translate or claim my work as your own. All rights reserved.

Taglist: @avatarbyamara, @sweetirilly, @0eye0, @elegantkidfansoul.

[luckyemo]

ATTENTION TO PEOPLE WHO PRE-ORDERED THE CHIHIRO FUJISAKI FIGURE FROM CRUNCHYROLL AND ARE STILL WAITING FOR THE ORDER TO SHIP

CRUNCHYROLL WILL NOT BE FULFILLING EXISTING PRE-ORDERS

I’m not sure how many people are affected by this, if it’s only people who ordered in a specific time frame, or people who pre-ordered and bought other items in the same order, or people from Canada, or another specific thing to my case, but if you or someone you know has been waiting for the Chihiro figure (or another pre-order figure/order made around Nov 2022-Jan 2023) from crunchyroll, do not wait for it to be sent out and instead send them an inquiry about it HERE (Select E-Commerce, Crunchyroll Store, then Where Is my item).

First I sent them an email asking for an update as they still hadn’t shipped my figure, the Chihiro figure wasn’t listed on their currently delayed list, the figure is currently listed as being in stock and ready to buy, and with no update from them I was starting to feel like I got scammed.

Here is their first reply (I sent my initial inquiry August 13, so 10 business days to reply):

Troy (Crunchyroll) Aug 25, 2023, 12:12 PM PDT Hi [name], I appreciate your patience and I do apologize for the long wait. We are currently experiencing a larger amount of requests than usual. Unfortunately, the recent store update created a few discrepancies that we're currently addressing, and your order could not be shipped. I would like to suggest that we cancel the unshipped order and issue a refund this way you may repurchase it. In the meantime please accept the following $10.00 coupon code due to this inconvenience: CX-NWVVH5ZVG429 Again, we apologize for the inconvenience. If there's anything else I can help with, please feel free to let me know! Troy Customer Service Team Crunchyroll

They are claiming that their warehouse move and store update has caused them to lose orders (I'm a computer scientist here to tell you this is something that couldn't happen accidentally, and at this point I could still view the order completed page from an incognito window with all the order info so it clearly was not lost), and instead of reaching out to people who pre-ordered they are waiting for people to cancel and re-order. They also do not include any specific numbers for the proposed refund, and as this order was split with one small item already sent to me I had no idea how they would handle the refund.

I sent them an email back explaining how ridiculous of a process that is, as well as when I ordered the figure I used a coupon that no longer exists, so they were suggesting I spend more money (and this is including using their $10 off coupon) to get something I pre-ordered even later. I explained that I want them to just send me the figure I already paid and waited for, but if that can’t be done I would only be comfortable in cancelling and re-ordering if I am properly refunded and can purchase the figure at the original price I paid for, stating the exact price points.

Their next reply:

Troy (Crunchyroll) Aug 29, 2023, 10:52 AM PDT Dear [name],  When we offered to reorder the item, we intended to honor the old price that you have paid initially for the item/order.  Please note that you won't be pushed back in the order queue, furthermore, you should be put higher in the queue since the order will be registered in the new system that we are currently operating with.  We do apologize for the inconvenience, but after our system migration, some old orders were affected and delayed. That is why we are offering different solutions/workarounds to make the fulfillment process faster for our customers.  Please let me know if you would like to proceed. In case you agree, we will gladly issue a full refund, and after you replace it we will honor the old price in case there will be a difference.  Looking forward to your reply!  Troy Customer Service Team Crunchyroll

Strange how things suddenly went from “could not be shipped” to just “delayed” and only now they are mentioning honouring the original sold price. Also strange how they are still not using any numbers, arguably the most important piece of information when discussing refunds. And I have no clue where the “that’s why we are offering different solutions/workarounds” is coming from because they weren't offering solutions, they waited until I reached out and was content with leaving me in the dark indefinitely while they took more orders for the figure they claim can’t be shipped out.

I expressed as much in my reply and restated how the refund should go down with exact numbers. I also stated that I still feel as if I’m being scammed and that if they can not guarantee a proper refund and a fair re-order price that I would rather seek a refund through my credit card company.

Their final reply gave a surprising good end:

Troy (Crunchyroll) Aug 30, 2023, 9:18 AM PDT Thank you for the update!  I've just refunded the charge for the order, however, I did not cancel it. It can take 1-2 business days for PayPal or 3-5 business days for your credit card to process the refund. If you used the payment method Sezzle, refunds can take up to 5-10 business days to appear on your statement. In the meantime, I have asked the warehouse to send a replacement package. Please note that we usually do not provide such service, it was done as a one-time courtesy.  n case you do not receive a tracking number in the next 7 days, please get back to me so I can further assist you. Thank you for your patience. Looking forward to your reply!  Troy Customer Service Team Crunchyroll

I have been refunded the full amount (including the $7 of the small thing they already sent). I’m raising an eyebrow at the order being refunded but not cancelled and the replacement package they are sending, but I’m hoping it’s just the figure so I can have my girl and move on from this (but also like…………. They’re just going to send it for free after all this? doubt.jpeg, but also wtf else could it be). Either way I got my money back and the figure is available at other stores now so I can walk away happy.

If you need to reach out to Crunchyroll and need help wording any emails, send me an ask/dm and I’ll help you. I have every email I sent saved, except the initial inquiry sent through their form, but I remember what I said more or less, and don’t mind sharing them for others to use the wording (I didn’t include them here in this post bc they have a few typos and this post is long enough already lol)

[more-than-a-princess]

I'm back home from Dragon Con! Very exhausted but happy. I'm looking forward to not having to wear heels, a wig cap, and wig tape/glue for a little while.

That said, I'm still on hiatus until Saturday, September 9. I have a few replies that I received right before I left for con and during con, so I will need this week to reply and queue them all. If you're currently working on replies to me, I'd love it if you could hold them until the weekend when I'll have some more time to reply and plot if needed with you. What I've currently got on my to-write list will likely be all I can handle this week between post-con exhaustion and a busy week at work.

And a small munday thing...

If you're a fan of anything besides anime/manga/video games (though they do have a presence there, but much smaller than an anime convention) and like conventions, elaborate cosplay, parties, and a fandom almost all of its own, I can't recommend visiting Dragon Con enough. There is so much to see and do, and there's really no other convention experience like it (and if you feel very old attending anime cons, attend Dragon Con and feel young again! 30-somethings are about the median age).

Case in point: there's a big following around ribbon trading/sharing (you put them on your con badge) and swag and seek (people bring various small, free gifts and hide them throughout the hotels for others to find!). This was my first year with ribbons, and some of what I collected throughout the weekend. I had to add some to the sides of my badge because it was getting so long!

Admittedly, many of them came from the group photoshoots I went to. But here's a photo:

All in all, definitely coming back next year. Now I get around two months until my next anime convention. I'm not doing too many new outfits this time around, but I'm finally getting a professional photoshoot of one of my Sonia costumes done, so she needs to be fixed up a bit.

[winterbranded]

[ ✮ ] 

[byuncock]

Do you still love me? // Baekhyun

pairing: baekhyun x oc/reader

genre: angst, slight fluff?

word count: 1.6k

a/n: unedited! inspo came from a oneshot that is no longer available to read.

The cafe was filled with such a happy atmosphere. You were feeling everything, but.

You looked over to your boyfriend as his attention was solely on the one person sitting across from him. Which so happens to be his ex.

The both of you were out for your anniversary celebration, but it seems like you were the only one excited noting the outfits as you looked down at yours then looking over to Baekhyun's laidback hoodie and sweats. Good thing anything he wears makes him look stylish.

For some reason his ex keeps glaring at you from time to time. You havent even talked to her beside a simple introduction of hello's and my name is.

Your mood for the day has been ruined and dampened even more at the fact that he was paying attention to his ex more than you. You heave out a sigh while staring ahead just wanting them to finish talking so the both of you could just end the day even though it's only the after noon.

Hearing the sigh Baekhyun turns towards you while his friend is still talking. He stares a bit feeling bad that you had to deal with this on a special day.

He turns to her, "Well, it was nice seeing you again. If you don't mind leaving us since we are celebrating our anniversary after all" Baekhyun shoos her politely.

She let's out a flabbergasted "Oh!" and nods at the both of you then leaving. Baekhyun turns his head towards yours and gives a peck at your temple.

Feeling annoyed you stood up to leave not before telling him, "Let's go home, Baekhyun"

You were washing the dishes. Deep in thought about when things went wrong with your relationship with baekhyun.

He's been distant since around a month ago you ponder. Then the affection started decreasing weekly along with dates and communication you investigate.

As you were deep in thought Baekhyun was standing at the entrance of the kitchen the whole time with his arms crossed while staring at you. Also, deep in thought of what words to start off.

"Hey, we need to talk" he starts off as he uncrosses his arms and walks closer to you leaving a good distance.

Coming back to reality you looked over to him then down at the sink since you were still washing the dishes, "What did you wanna talk about?" letting out nonchalantly.

He opens his mouth, but the words are stuck. He closes and swallows, trying again, "I don't think I want to continue this relationship anymore" he lets out softly. As if he was hesitant even saying it, scared even.

You knew this was coming. Were you surprised? No. Just disappointed. You ceased washing the plates and turn to look fully at him, "Why?" genuinely curious even though you were breaking inside.

He stayed silent while looking around. Trying to find the words you assumed. "Do you still love me anymore?" you questioned in a whisper.

He stares at you straight in the eye, "I don't think I love you anymore" he finally lets out. Breaking you completely.

It was suddenly getting harder to breathe. You feel the tears creeping up. But you swallowed a large lump and nodded. Going back to finish washing the dishes, "Alright then, I guess this is it?" you questioned.

Not letting him say anything else when you added, "I'll pack my stuff when I'm done with this" you turn your head at him with a forced small smile.

Then he left.

-

It's been about a few weeks. Or a month. You don't really know since you lost count of the days. Not having the energy to even care about anything else besides your broken heart.

You were staying at your friend's place, who is kind enough to let you move in, but because of reasons you didn't want to do that to her. Letting her know you'll only be staying there for a short time until you find your own place.

The sun has set and the moon is shining brightly. Though the weather has been nice lately your mood hasn't got any better. So you try to cheer yourself up by having walks daily either in the morning or night.

This time around you were feeling extra sad and heartbroken which led to all memories with Baekhyun and self doubt. Must be your incoming monthly cycle.

You were walking out at night aimlessly. Which should be dangerous, but you didnt care at the moment. Not until someone grabbed your shoulders from behind and turned you around, startling you.

You were so shock you didn't really get to process who the person was before they pulled you into their embrace. The scent giving it away.

The tears you've been trying to keep at bay for the past week had finally been let go.

Baekhyun hears you sobbing and hugs you tighter while whispering apologies and I love yous in your ear.

You were so upset and hurt that he broke it off just like that. All the anger and sadness coming out through your sobs and actions. You pushed him away while looking at him.

"W- What ar-are you doin- doing?" you asked while hiccuping. Now that you were finally able to take a look at him you cried even harder.

He was flabbergasted, didn't know what to do, but pull you in his embrace once again while apologizing, "I.... I'm sorry my love.... I'm so sorry"

He tightened his hug while whispering apologies and sweet nothings.

While you just stood there. Limp. Bawling your eyes out at the same man who broke your heart.

So many thoughts were bombarding your already tired head. Why is he here? Why is he hugging me? How did he recognize me? What the fuck?

Baekhyun let you cry in his arms while he soothes your back. Waiting for you to calm down before he speaks again. When you do he lets out softly, "I would like to speak with you. If that's okay?" pulling away at arms length so he can look at you. Trying to decipher the emotion on your face other than sadness.

You were so confused, "What do you even want to talk about?" giving a deep frown as you try to back away from him and have a decent amount of space in between.

Baekhyun didn't like that. Even though you created distance he still managed to graze his hands down to yours to intertwine them.

"I wanted to apologize" he started quickly. "I know I broke your heart and told you I no longer loved you, but baby was I so damn wrong," he tightened his hold on you.

Millions of emotions ran through you. Still confused obviously. But now. Upset. How can he just do that? One second decides he no longer loves you and breaks it off then come back because he was wrong. Who does that?

He was eagerly waiting for any type of reply, but all he received was a troubled look and thoughts running through your head.

"These past weeks we've been apart felt like hell. I realized I made a mistake shortly after I broke it off with you, but I didn't want to get back to you so soon because I wanted to be sure that I still love you. Which I do, which is why I was trying to plan something until I ran into you" he pauses. Letting you soak in what he said before continuing.

He saw your eyes move from the ground up to his eyes. He took that as a queue to talk again and hopefully convince you how sincere he is.

"Something in my gut told me to do it now or else I wouldn't have got a chance later. So I took it." he pauses again and slowly gravitate you towards him into an embrace so the both of you could look directly at each other.

"Now I am hoping you can forgive me and give me another chance because I love you so damn much. I'm a fucking moron to ever thought I didn't love you anymore. Please, baby. Give me another chance and let me be with you again." he softly lets out with his lips just a centimeter away from yours.

His eyes occasionally drift between your eyes and your lips. Somehow his arms were wrapped around you.

You were still soaking it in. Everything was too much at the moment and in the state you were currently in didn't help.

The whole time he talked you didn't even reply back with anything besides all the emotional looks he caught.

You were deep in thought. So deep in thought you forgot what was happening until you feel his arms tighten around you.

You can tell the situation was making him anxious and your lack of response made it 10x worse.

"I don't" you croaked. Clearing your throat you tried again " I don't know" you finally let out.

He ended up placing his forehead against yours and stared deeply into your eyes. "Please" he begged with a crack in his voice. He closed his eyes and his expression seemed like he was holding back his tears.

You didn't feel bad.

You pulled away from him. Making sure you were six feet apart and he stood there with his eyes closed. You can see a tear run down his pretty features.

"My number's still the same" you whispered. You stood there for another few seconds then turn to leave.

If he wanted you back then he better work his ass off.

You were not going to experience that heart break again. You wanted to be sure that he means it so if the both of you do get back together there wouldn't be doubts. There wouldn't be second thoughts of what if Baekhyun falls out of love with you again. Because you have no idea if you can handle that the second time.

-

As you are walking back to your friend's place. Your phone vibrates.

~

a/n: lmk your thoughts!

[fonteyn]

an update on where i’ve been

under the cut  is a long rant on which i’m getting some things off my chest.

I'm not sure if anyone is wondering, not sure if anyone even noticed, honestly, but I haven't posted or pretty much interacted here on Tumblr for at least a month now, my queue was running for a little bit but I got tired of filling it and eventually stopped posting at all. I've received a couple of messages and replies to the last chapter I posted on my Caspian fic asking about when I would update and I first of all feel I need to apologize for the long wait. The truth I found myself fighting with for the last couple of months is that actually....I'm not okay. 

I've been holding on for most of the pandemic, keeping myself busy, taking ballet classes and all, but then university came back and keeping up with the full schedule of classes, assignments and my internship (which demands about 30 hours every week) became very difficult and unfortunately sent me into a downwards spiral. 

One thing that has been constantly on my mind is that I have to get a new internship soon as my contract ends in March and I need the money from it to keep paying my bills and medication. In the last two months, I was rejected by every single one of the places I applied to (some of you might have seen other posts I made about this). 

I currently live with my parents, my brother and my boyfriend. My parents and sibling have created a war zone between them. They fight ALL THE TIME which is upsetting for too many reasons to number. I feel embarrassed that my s/o is subjected to watching this, he could live somewhere else but i think something tells him that if he did, I'd unravel too. 

Also, my dad, a lifelong alcoholic, has gone back to more hardcore drinking habits. He spent 2018 sober, but fell off the wagon in January 2019. He has done this many times before, drinking a little bit here and there, hiding from me and my mom, and becoming bolder as time goes on, which is how he is right now. Getting piss drunk every single day. This is not only saddening but also disruptive to me as he gets very touchy and mad about anything you tell him when he's intoxicated. He happens to be the kind of person who knows exactly what to say when he wants to hurt you. We argue. I scream. He says things to me that make me cry like a little girl. I feel powerless. I thought we were past this. Once I had a job and my own money, he seemed to respect me more, but when he's drunk he's right back to his old asshole self.

And then... well...the elephant in the room is coronavirus. I was feeling okay, not super paranoid for a long while but something clicked on me ever since my ballet teacher tested positive back in mid-October. Me and my partner also found out that some people whom we trusted were not being as safe as they had us believe, and now I don't want to go out EVER. I put so much alcohol on my hands every day that my skin is peeling. I clean everything, my shoes, the groceries, the car. I take a full body shower anytime I get home from a forced outing. I always wear a mask. My boyfriend also takes all the precautions. But as I said, I live with three more people, who don't have the same thoughts. Despite agreeing with the seriousness of the situation when I talk to them, they have varying degrees of protection. Yes, they wear masks. But my parents don't clean the groceries with alcohol. They don't take off their shoes when they get home. My mom cleans houses for work and doesn't wear a mask when she's at her employers as her shifts are long, and she usually ends up eating lunch there. Anyway, these are just a few quips. All of it makes me insanely anxious, so much so that I even though about moving out. But I don't have the financial stability necessary to do that as I won't have a job in three months (and this is not something I can negotiate bc there's a law in my country that you can't intern in the same place for over 2 yrs) and I need to pay my own bills (including my meds) and frequent blood tests cause - uuuuh - have i mentioned that I've been on an accutane course for six months?

It's all just been adding up. There are more weird petty things too, i guess.

I'm going into my last year of university and have no idea what to do next, I'm pretty sure I won't hold onto any college friends as even the fucking quarantine made them forget all about me (they hit me up only when they need material for a certain class we're taking). I feel alone and isolated, which i understand is something a lot of us are dealing with. I feel selfish knowing that I haven't had any major losses, and yet I feel so fucking sad all the time. The moment I realized I was definitely not okay was when I was crying as I wrote my tax law assignment. I haven't been better ever since.

If you are still reading after this nonsensical rant on which i exposed my private family life to strangers on the internet, i thank you for hearing me out.

If you're a reader of my fics, I'm sorry for not updating enter a king and a queen. I'm working on chapters, they will most likely be very long, probably longer than the previous ones. I will be taking my time, and hopefully I can get something out by mid January.

Uhh, I don't know how to finish this so....i guess...I'll see you when I see you.

Happy holidays, everyone. I wish health to you and all your loved ones 💕

[toodi-imagines]

2D going with his S/O to their families pool house for vacation? I'm leaving tomorrow and my aunt and uncle have a pool and I can't stop thinking how it'd be if 2D went to that kind of place lmao

I’m sorry this is so late ;_; bls forgive me

You and 2D had been anticipating your trip to meet your extended family for nearly a month now. Some of your family had a decent amount of money, and they had invited you to stay with them at their pool house for a week during the summer, encouraging you to bring along your boyfriend of nearly a year for them to meet. You packed excitedly, going over the list of supplies for the third time, assuring that you had everything. “You ready, D?” you asked with a grin. He gave you an unconvincing smile. “Something wrong?” you quizzed. “I’m not good at family events…I’m not exactly a saint…Not so popular wiff the grandmums, yew know?” he explained nervously. “D, they’re gonna love you. And if they don’t, who cares?” you replied with ease. He gave you a nod and silently continued his packing. It wasn’t usual for him to be so self-conscious. Seeing him sans his routine cocky attitude was almost comical. You pondered the possible root of his current anxiety, deciding that it was a question for another day. You placed the last item in your suitcase and tugged the zipper shut. “I’m taking my stuff out to the car, everything else is ready to go, come out when you’re done,” you directed, heading out the door. You lugged your suitcase out to the car and hoisted it into the backseat. You climbed in the driver’s seat–seeing as 2D’s driving was far from enjoyable–and waited. He emerged moments later, wheeling his suitcase pensively. He hopped in the seat next to you, and you tossed him your phone to queue music while you backed out of the driveway. He opened your phone and pulled up a Spotify playlist the two of you shared, playing a depressing song first. “D, don’t you think you’re being a little dramatic?” you asked, mildly irritated at his theatrics. This was typical of 2D–every emotion he felt was worn directly on his sleeve, and he was known for being melodramatic about the most minor situations. At times, this was endearing. It was comforting to know he was so open with his emotions, but at other times his tendency to exaggerate was bothersome. He remained slumped over and refused to answer. “We’re literally going to a pool house, you should be at least a little enthused,” you said nudging him. He brightened his expression a little, the optimist side of him weighing the possibilities. You picked up your phone and skipped the song, which was followed by an upbeat, jam song. 2D grinned and replied, “Yeah I guess you’re right, I can’t be all that bad.” You still had no clue what prior experience had caused this sort of trepidation in him about family events, but again decided you’d rather not ask. With 2D’s mood improved, the two of you jammed and cruised the entire drive. You pulled into the dimly lit driveway of your family’s pool house just as dusk set in. Having had a long drive, both of you exulted at the opportunity to stretch your limbs. Both of you climbed out of the vehicle and groaned as you unfolded your extremities. You yawned and headed towards the door, noticing a few steps in that 2D had stalled behind you. You turned back and reached out, taking his hand in yours. Wide-eyed and visibly nervous, he accepted, and you started towards the door once more. After a ring of the doorbell, your uncle’s smiling face appeared in front of you. “Hey, Y/N! Good to see ya!” he said pulling you into an embrace. “And you must be Stuart,” he continued giving a nod towards 2D and extending his arm for a handshake. “Ehrm, yeah, yew can call me 2D, fough,” he replied uncomfortably, awkwardly shaking your uncle’s hand. “Well…2D…” your uncle paused, fully taking in 2D’s cartoonish appearance. “The call me that ‘cos I sort of got hit in the face wiff a car by a drunken bastard twice, and now I loo’ like I got two dents in my face, yew see,” 2D sardonically explained unnecessarily. “Well…you make yourself at home…” your uncle responded, unsure of himself. 2D was just as bad at this as he had made it sound. The two you stepped in, and you were greeted by a few of your relatives standing around. “Everyone’s out back by the pool, and there’s some barbecue still on the grill for you two if you want to head out,” your aunt offered ushering you towards the patio door. “Sounds good!” you chimed back, leading 2D out with you. You stepped out into the warm, muggy air and greeted your relatives sitting in the deck chairs. They all looked elated to see the two of you and directed you towards the food. You accepted their offer and quickly introduced 2D before ditching him to fill a plate. From the grill, you could overhear them quizzing the poor boy. “So, young man, Y/N tells us you’re in a band?” “Yeah I’m lead singer of Gorillaz.” He had said it so many times, it almost sounded mechanical and standoffish. “You make good money doin’ that?” one of your relatives interrogated. Before they had a chance to chastise 2D any further or 2D had a chance to say something dimwitted, you returned with two plates. “D, would you mind getting the drinks?” you urged, hoping you could distract your relatives in the meantime. He escaped, and you struck up conversation with your family. You continued chatting as 2D reappeared, drinks in hand. After a while, 2D joined the conversation, which was going smoothly. Later on in the evening, as everyone started to relax, a few people decided it was a good night for a late swim. Excitedly, you agreed and dragged 2D out to the car to collect your suitcases and unpack your swimsuits. You hauled them in and your uncle directed you towards the room you’d be staying in for the week. Once you were in the privacy of your room, you quickly dug out your swimsuit and began changing. “See, D, I told you it wasn’t gonna be so bad meeting my family,” you said as you changed. “Maybe not,” he agreed with lingering doubt. “You’re gonna be just fine,” you said giving him a peck on the cheek as the two of you finished changing and happily joined your family in the pool. 

[whifferdills]

Twelve is Wrecked™ physically and mentally on an adventure and when asked/interrogated afterwards by nardole he decides to go down the 'I'm fine' route. This insistence continues even as he reluctantly allows the help/cuddles/stitching up.

Twelvedole, gen, ~550 words, h/c cuddlecore

It was a mistake and a shitshow and an absolute crescendo of bad decisions and it’s over, now. The TARDIS grumbling as she lands home, her doors opening reluctantly for them. Stumbling over the threshold, back into everyday life. Jobs, responsibilities, a set schedule. Tea time, laundry day, lectures at 2 PM, a Netflix queue.

The sun is shining, for once: it’s a beautiful clear summer day that greets them. The Doctor’s arm over Nardole’s shoulder, the Doctor only kind of sorta supporting their own weight. Mostly just flopping around uselessly, and they’re heavier than they look. Nardole readjusts them, clenches his jaw, and soldiers on.

The TARDIS whines, and quiets, doors closing. He pours the Doctor onto the sofa, and stretches, flexing out the muscle kinks and ground gears. “You alright?” he asks.

“Yeah,” the Doctor says. They have a glazed, dazed look in their eyes, and they’re bruised, bleeding.

“You need fixing,” Nardole replies. Full mother-hen mode.

“I’m okay.”

“You’ve got - ” Nardole swipes some of the blood off of the Doctor’s forehead, briefly revealing a gash before the blood wells back up. “I’m getting the first-aid kit. Don’t die before I get back, okay?”

Tape and gauze and antiseptic and a shock-blanket and individually-wrapped paracetamol. Nardole rips open the antiseptic wipette packet and carefully cleans the Doctor’s face off. The smell of alcohol and blood; he bravely does not pass out.

“It’s fine. It’ll heal itself. Stop fussing.” The Doctor, swaying woozily.

“I’m not driving you to hospital to get stitches, this is my minimum level of fuss. So shush.” He peels a sticky-strip-thing off its paper, pinches the cut on the Doctor’s forehead together and then tapes over it. Gauze pad over that, more tape. He resists the impulse to kiss it all better.

“There you go. Job done. You can leave, now.”

“What you saw, what you went through -”

“Don’t want to talk about it. But I’m fine. You can go.”

“Can do, yeah,” Nardole says. “Won’t, though.” He sits next to the Doctor, careful to not jostle anything injured, which is currently most of them.

“Seriously. I don’t need coddling, this is pointless, I don’t want - ” They break off, eyes bright and wet, red-rimmed.

“Shut up. And even if you are fine, which you aren’t, fuck off; even if you are perfectly lovely and happy and great I am not, okay? I’m not fine. So.” Nardole leans gently against the Doctor’s side, finds their hand, holds it carefully.

“We’re alright now,” the Doctor says quietly. “Hey? It worked out. Nothing to worry about.” To themself as much as to Nardole.

Nardole gently, delicately maneuvers the two of them around, trying to find somewhere where no one is in any more pain than they have to be. He winds up with the Doctor on his lap, cradled in his arms, head resting against his chest. Still bleeding, but hey, that’s what dry cleaning is for.

“This is stupid. Waste of time,” the Doctor mumbles, muffled, mouth against Nardole’s jumper.

“If saying that helps, then fine. But I’m not leaving you alone. And you’re gonna like it. Right?”

“Right,” the Doctor says. They squirm closer, then relax, eyes closing.

Nardole brushes their hair back, shifts to find a comfortable spot under all their pointy elbows, then settles into the groove of the sofa, closing his eyes too.