#i get the anger i really do
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Hey, please be normal towards Critical Role in re: WotC
They are in a contract with DnD Beyond and there is absolutely NO benefit to you going off to clown in the livestream chat about how they’re ‘letting the community down’ by not commenting on the OGL fiasco.
the streams are pre-recorded, not live
they are under CONTRACT with DDB
breaking contract, including clauses not to speak out against the company, is not a slap on the wrist
It is not merely a loss of money
It could mean a lawsuit
The crew’s stance is already clear because Matt has been liking tweets speaking out against the new OGL
They will speak about it when they are able, probably after consulting with lawyers or their legal team.
It’s understandable that you want them to speak out against this. But give them time. The entire thing is still going off of LEAKS for fuck’s sake.
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truth serum / system reveal au where shen qingqiu gets hit with an uncloaking spell that reveals the system in the reflection of his eyes every time it pops up.
during one of his missions, in the treasure hoard of some dragon-like creature, he finds a golden, oval shaped hand mirror, its gaudy style more victorian based than anything (airplane you hack!), that doesn't seem to do anything when he looks into it. but when he does, it reveals the system's screen in his eyes.
he doesn't notice this, of course, because he can't see it, and the system, surprisingly, stays quiet.
the peak lords think he's cursed.
maybe mu qingfang is the first to notice, during the mandatory post mission check-up, when shen qingqiu is scrolling through his most recently accumulated points and mu qingfang can see the strange vividly-blue lines reflected in his pupils. it's gone when shen qingqiu blinks, like it was nothing but a trick of the light.
it comes out when yue qingyuan is visiting and, just as he's done laying out the plans for a new mission, shen qingqiu's eyes glaze over and a bright blue box takes over the whole of his iris. shen qingqiu goes quiet; the thing in his eyes moves, shifts, pulses for a second, like static worms crawling all over his pupils. then he blinks, and it's gone, and shen qingqiu accepts the mission that yue qingyuan was almost sure he would decline.
maybe there is an intervention, when the peak lords corner shen qingqiu at qian cao peak and try to figure out what's wrong, subjecting him to all kinds of treatments and curse-finding spells that turn up empty, they can't find anything.
of course, the silencing threat is still very much up and running. at first shen qingqiu was kind of confused by the whole ordeal, but when the peak lords start describing a "strange blue box", he realizes, with sickening suddenty, that they're describing the system. and he can't say anything.
this only makes everything worse, because their fellow peak lord now keeps evading every question and acts like he doesn't understand. liu qingge points right at his face and asks, "that blue box, what is it?" and shen qingqiu laughs nervously and starts talking about how bright the weather is and surely it's the sky and nothing to worry about!
even worse, during the intervention the system thought it was a good idea to start talking to him, so now even the peak lords who hadn't seen it and who might have been persuaded by light tricks and reflections, get a first row view that no, that definitely isn't a trick of the light.
they try to do the whole thing of "are you in danger, blink twice" but shen qingqiu can't even do that because it's still a direct admittance!
maybe eventually he starts saying vague confirmations that don't actually confirm anything, like "this master hears what you're saying", or maybe he goes with a classic "this master can neither confirm nor deny that." but the system starts warning him for that too and eventually he stops saying anything, which worries the others more.
luckily mu qingfang catches on that every time they ask a direct question about the box or shen qingqiu says anything vaguely confirming, it appears. it doesn't appear when they ask about curses or demons, so it must not see that as a threat.
for a little extra angst: maybe the peak lords keep pressuring him for answers, and at some point shen qingqiu gets fed up and snaps out something like, "why don't you understand that i'm not allowed to answer that!" the system counts this as a direct admittance, threatening it's existence. so it punishes. shen qingqiu has a qi deviation so bad it lasts two weeks and takes two people every day to cleanse his meridians. the system doesn't appear in that time. it doesn't appear for a long while after that, either. the peak lords stop asking, mainly because shen qingqiu will instantly leave the room if they do. they don't stop searching for a cure, though.
shang qinghua returns from a business trip and catches on the second someone mentions a blue box and forced silencing.
#i like the idea of sqq sort of disassociating every time he talks with the system#like his eyes go unfocused and he goes quiet and doesnt seem to hear what others are saying#and the others always thought that was odd but hey. whatever. until some strange *thing* started showing up#i do also like the idea of the system slowly allowing sqq more liberties#bc its decided it likes this storyline#liu qingge comes to cleanse sqqs meridians and gets red with anger when the system pops up in sqqs eyes#but then sqq reaches out to him and says ''no. it... likes you.''#the system doesnt (cant) really like anyone. but its gifting him friendship points when liu qingge visits him and that's positive?#liu qingge doesnt see it as positive and gets even more mad because what do you MEAN this monster enitity ''likes him''????#liu qingge is going to kill it the first chance he has!!#yue qingyuan talks about a mission looking for volunteers and you can *see* his face fall when the blue box appears#''it wants you to go. doesn't it?'' ''this shidi would like to join this mission.'' ''i understand.''#sometimes the blue box appears and sqq looks *stricken*. like he just saw something really awful#but he just cant talk about it#svsss#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain#shen qingqiu#yue qingyuan#mu qingfang#system svsss#svsss au#reveal au
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Scary Sunset.
I'm concepting things way outta order in this story, but I'm sure you can piece things together. Context is for a storybeat where, after defeating and capturing Adagio (thus having all three sirens in her possession), Sunset enacts her revenge plot to release the sirens on Canterlot as Thea discovers she's been manipulated. In a confrontation, the two scuffle and fight over the siren orbs while Sunset struggles with her conflicting wants and emotions.
#mlp#sunset shimmer#twilight sparkle#twiset#the orbs are the glass balls sunset carries on her back btw its in her cast line up art#deep down sunset hates thea. she was named “twilight” by celestia. the time of day succeeding sunset. she was always her replacement#but at this point in the story sunset's also fallen for thea. so it's also a conflict of wills in sunset. love or hatred.#hence the “don't make me do this” language. she's rationalizing her hatred and violence as thea forcing her hand and getting in her way#when in reality she doesn't need to do any of this. it's her last stand and outburst to cling to a life of revenge that she's grown too#fond of. because she knows thea has the power to change that and disrupt her identity as a pathetic victim who fell from glory#and that's scary. thea's a very scary thing to sunset because suddenly sunset wants something and to be someone new.#she suddenly wants to change. to be better for someone else. and she never thought or believed that could be an option for her#anyways toxic yuri yayyy#my art#the grand galloping 20s#character design#i hope i got across the pained conflicted emotions in sunset's face tho i belabored over them these past 3 days#i hope a look of anger and dissonance and guilt and “oh god i don't really wanna hurt you please just obey me” while trying to intimidate#is readable. if so it's all in the eyebrows babey
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Jason's been pestering Danny about why he looks like a borderline walking corpse for ages and Danny has decided to put his lying skills to the test. (he has none)
rambling below cut
I've been playing w the idea that the more Danny transforms, the more his ghost form gets "lively" while his human form gets weaker and more sickly. He knows that if he keeps transforming like this then, one day, he's not going to have a livable body to go back to, but he really doesn't want to think about all that. He's more interested in the weird "totally dead but not dead" Wayne son who may or may not have a thing for his sister.
everytime i do one these im like "this time I'll keep it simple so I don't have to suffer through colouring bc I have zero foresight—it'll be greyscale at most" and then all of the sudden its 4am and i'm trying to finish a stupid comic but i decided to add "some" colour to spice it up and hide my shitty ink job and then SOME COLOUR ALWAYS BECOMES FULL COLOUR WHY CAN I NOT ESCAPE THIS STUPID CYCLE!!
(did this all stem from me not being able to decide between a super pale character design and one w a vibrant tan bc I love white hair + tan but I also love extremely pale albino so I forced myself to find a way to make both work? never! that's absurd!)
#digital art#artists on tumblr#fanart#illustration#comic#danny phantom fanart#danny fenton#danny phantom#dc x dp#dc x dp crossover#dc x dp fanart#if u couldn't tell from the rambles#i ended up colouring this comic bc of the stupid transition at the beginning#the things i do for a silly transition#they bring me joy#and oh so much frustration#as a multishipper i find it really hard to put ships in aus like this#im still debating whether imma have anger management in this or not#cause im down for the chaos they would bring as both platonic and romantic#also Danny is sus of Jason bc he thinks hes trying to get w Jazz#Jasons sus of the Fentons Jazz is so nice its suspicious and Danny just radiates uncanny valley#my art#my comic
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apocalypse doodlings aka We Couldve Had Grey Hair Erik And Charles Is There Too I Guess
#mcu#xmen#xmen movies#xmen apocalypse#erik lehnsherr#magneto#charles xavier#professor x#cherik#not really but sssshh theyre in the same post#snap sketches#anyway Be Surprised If You Will i just intended to do practice drawings of charles tonight#charles doodle is a vague redraw of the first charles doodle i made so thats fun i GUESS#its been a hot minute and james' face still eludes me but we're getting somewhere Probably. i hope.#but then i remembered micheal said originally they were going to make erik's hair go white in apocalypse and i crumbled#and i was JUST gonna leave it at the first erik drawing but then i was like 'can i draw him chilling for once' so. pseudo screencap redraw#it was so funny drawing the first two back-to-back on the same canvas cause i had Charming Charles in one folder#and i open the second one and its. Rage. Anger. and then to round it off He Got Better :) vjealkeajvLK#sorry i made the charles drawing look like a dating sim screenshot i was gonna leave the bg blank but i got mad at it being blank#so i cobbled that together. i cobble a dating sim appropriate bg together vjelkjea#its so funny a lot of times ill be like 'i wont draw a bg' and then ill make a quick one anyway i cant resist i apologize#ok im so sleepy so goodnight team my head hurt
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My biggest fear when I was younger was forgiving those who have wronged me, because it meant I moved on.
#there was a longer version of this convo but i shortened it down <3#anyways- here's a brief concept I though of#it's a conversation between Ford's younger Uni self and Ford's older self (<- A DISASTER WAITING TO HAPPEN)#how kind do you think the twins would be to their younger selves#we've seen them meet one another's younger counterparts- how do you think they would be with themselves?#the duality of someone who's had the time to work it out and learn to forgive VS. someone whose wound is still so raw and fresh#they can't help but keep poking at it until it gets infected#and the irrationality of holding onto your anger and keep feeding it even though it's doing nothing but hurt you#doesn't necessarily mean you have to forgive- but in the context of the twins- it really isn't doing any good#the fear of letting go meaning that you lost- and the other won#the pointlessness of it all- O! is it not poetic?#anywho <3#my art#gravity falls#grunkle ford#gravity falls ford#ford pines#stanford pines#this is literally done so lazy but i had to get the idea out of my head
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one of the things about being an educator is that you hear what parents want their kids to be able to do a lot. they want their kid to be an astronaut or a ballerina or a politician. they want them to get off that damn phone. be better about socializing. stop spending so much time indoors. learn to control their own temper. to just "fucking listen", which means to be obedient.
one of the things i learned in my pedagogy classes is that it's almost always easier to roleplay how you want someone to act. it's almost always easier to explain why a rule exists, rather than simply setting the rule and demanding adherence.
i want my kids to be kind. i want them to ask me what book they should read next, and i want to read that book with them so we can discuss it. i want my kid to be able to tell me hey that hurt my feelings without worrying i'll punish them. i want my kid to be proud of small things and come running up to me to tell me about them. i want them to say "nah, i get why this rule exists, but i get to hate it" and know that i don't need them to be grateful-for-the-roof-overhead while washing the dishes. i want them to teach me things. i want them to say - this isn't safe. i'm calling my mom and getting out of this. i want them to hear me apologize when i do fuck up; and i want them to want to come home.
the other day a parent was telling me she didn't understand why her kid "just got so angry." this woman had flown off the handle at me.
my dad - traditional catholic that he is - resents my sentiment of "gentle parenting". he says they'll grow up spoiled, horrible, pretentious. granola, he spits.
i am going to be kind to them. i am going to set the example, i think. and whatever they choose become in the meantime - i'm going to love them for it.
#writeblr#i was doing a lot with high school students. over and over again#other teachers kept asking me what i was doing differently - why the kids listened to me. i am not particularly foreboding#and i have a pretty firm personal policy of never reacting in anger#godhelpme.#i was always kind of taken aback#because in general the kids were pretty easy. i explained i needed to keep everything “PG-13” because this was my workplace#and it was kind of their workplace#too. besides#i love swearing#and since i couldn't swear#neither could they - so if they were going to say “fuck” or become violent#they needed to choose a really specific time#because we only get “the one”.. sure enough - nobody wanted to waste the one very specific “fuck” utterance. kids listened.#i think just because - that rule makes sense. the kids understand that i don't want to be unfair to them#that censorship is stupid#but that i'm under these rules too so like let's ride it out together#also i look young and tbh between me and u nobody wants to make the nice english teacher cry#the way these kids defended me to their friends was really genuinely so heartwarming bc the Grouchy Frat Boy#would be like MISS RAQUEL DOESN'T DESERVE THAT KIND OF AN ATTITUDE BRO DON'T TALK BACK TO HER
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The experience of being singled out by a teacher as unexceptional since day one. Trying something new and getting endlessly questioned about the why, the how. For months, going to class and giving up on doing well because it's not like this teacher ever cared about you anyway. Being berated in front of your whole class for your slipping grades and not knowing what to do about it.
And then the flip. In the middle of the year apparently something you did was impressive. Your teacher is friendly with you in a way they never were, and your sudden success was all a part of their plan, their method. "This is what I was trying to tell you, and you finally got it!".
You convince yourself of that too, grudgingly. It all worked out. That teacher really did know best after all. All that stuff at the beginning of the year, all that stuff for the two years before that, that was fine. It was all part of the plan. The humiliation and the stress and the nights spent wondering "What am I not getting about this?", were all necessary.
It's time for teacher evaluations. All fives.
#fantasy high#fhjy#gorgug thistlespring#as a black person gorgug's arc really gets me on a personal level#just the “yeah i guess that teacher was weird and harsh with me specifically but it must have just been something i was doing wrong"#and then you find out later that it's something wrong with them and their worldview#and all you're left with is betrayal and anger and wasted time#“i *knew* he was a bad teacher!” but you convinced yourself otherwise just so you could make it through the year
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Persephone's Binding Part 2
Hardcover/Anger Management ship Sacrificial Bride au
AO3 Prompt Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
(Things get a bit angsty here for a bit, but don't worry, it gets back to some of the cracky-goodness!)
After allowing himself to relax for a bit and actually letting his muscles loosen for once, Jason rose from the bath and rinsed himself off under a piping hot and strong shower. He finished the rinse off with a flash of cold water to focus back up and made his way to the vanity where there was basic hotel amenities. He attempted to style his hair and after at least drying it, pulled on the fluffiest robe he has felt since he first moved into the manor all those years ago.
Fuck. The family. The Outlaws...
Jason put his face in both his hands and took a deep breath, then allowed his shoulders to slump as he dragged his hands from his face to his sides. He marched in a lazy manor over to the end of the large bed where he flopped face down. Surprisingly, it wasn't as fluffy as he was expecting and he silently thanked whatever force there was that he wouldn't have to resort to sleeping on the floor or a chair for the familiarity. Though, he turned his head to face the windows, that little reading nook looks like I could easily fall asleep there.
No, stop it. Do I remember the Dimensional Code for home?
Jason contemplated. On one hand, it could be useful, on the other, they could have an entirely different category system here. He spent the next however long trying to remember the dimensional code for his Earth and tracing the swirls of purples and greens out the large windows. A knock startled him.
"Jason? Are you decent?" He stood quickly and pulled the robe tighter together, not quite ready to show his autopsy scars to his soul-owner? A literal goddess? He wasn't quite sure what she was yet.
"Uh, yes, come in, I'm covered." He tried to stand casually next to the bed when he had just been sitting, his hands now in his pockets.
"Hi, so one of my aides figured one thing out about the ritual that is somewhat concerning and also something I probably also should have brought up. Mind if we sit at the window?" She strode in and settled herself with a pillow against the window and waited for him to do the same. Once he was settled, she hesitated for a moment before sighing and looking out the window to the haunting site outside.
"The Infinite Realms has another name, one coined from my Earth." She licked her lips before she spoke again. "It's also known as the Ghost Zone. As the dimension between dimensions, it is also where beings known as ghosts, the Restless Dead, Neverborn, Gods, and all sorts of other beings that thrive off a substance known as ectoplasm reside. As such, I am current Queen Regent of Ghosts." She let him think for a moment before turning to him. "That means I can tell when someone is death-touched." Jason froze. "I didn't mention it before because I know it's super personal, but then my aide figured out that the ritual only worked because of the fact you are and especially since you had spent time here-" She cut herself off as his eyes just bugged out larger with every word that spilled from her lips. "Sorry, I just, I'm death-touched too. I haven't died yet, but I have been around death magic, or radiation, or whatever it is, since before conception. I don't know exactly what you went through, but I know it was deeply traumatic. I can have my healers take a look at your soul and see if it's alright because it kinda radiates a bit how traumatic it was." She bit her lip with one hand raised near her chin.
Jason closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and clenching his jaw tight and blowing the air harshly out his nose. He fell back against the window, allowing his head to knock against the glass. It was warm, as though the sunlight was gently shining upon it. "Yeah." He croaked. "Yeah, I died." He said softer. "I was dead for roughly six months." He dipped his head forward to block his face with his bangs. "Crawled outta my own grave." He laughed bitterly. "Spent a while wandering, a while more in a coma." He swallowed tickly. "Got picked up by my dad's vindictive ex and trained for a while to be an assassin." He looked up at her, making eye contact. "She dunked me in this pit of magic shit, we call it a Lazarus pit in my dimension. It cures those near death and kills the healthy. Fixed me up the rest of the way, or at least the scars and issues I had pre-death. I got to keep these." He allowed the top of the robe to fall away, showing the tops of the large y-shaped scar that ran the length of his torso. She gasped, both hands coming to cover her mouth, tears began to form in her eyes. She reached out as if to touch them and stopped herself, her face turning determined.
"I, Jazmine Nightingale, High Queen Regent of the Infinite Realms, the Mediator, the Caretaker, and all those other titles." She waved her wrist. "Declare that I will help you however you deem necessary. Whether that be helping your soul, returning you to your dimension, breaking this binding, or whatever. You are currently bound to you, and as such that makes you my responsibilities." She paused in her speech for a moment, thinking. "I mean, you're already technically one of my subjects because I think you qualify as one of the Restless Dead, but we'll figure out your classification when we take you to a healer. For now, it has been a long day. I will have one of my aides come to get your measurements for some clothes, I'm sure we have some around here somewhere that should fit you at least for dinner. The aides can get any style you like and it can be made quickly by the seamstresses we have on staff." At his hesitation she added with a smile, "They work in supernatural means, they will not overwork themselves by making an entire wardrobe in a few hours."
She patted the cushion in front of her and stood. "I will meet you at dinner, it's not formal at all, don't worry about dressing fancy, I'm just still in this getup from 'official queen stuff'" she said with air quotes looking tired. "I'll see you in a bit Jason!"
"Yes, um, your majesty." He stood to bow, the robe making it a bit difficult."
"Just Jazz please, for the love of the Ancients." She said with a pained look on her face.
"Right, sorry," he stammered, straightening, "See you later, Jazz." She smiled softly before leaving him to himself. He smacked his hand to his face groaning at himself before flopping face-first into the bed again. "She's the ruler of the dead and she's so determined and nice, what the actual hell? She's so earnest, it's so cute!" he sat up leaning his elbow on his knee. "Okay, operation Romance Plot is go. She isn't put off by the fact you died, this is good, I can work with this. Okay, so castle, let's go with that aesthetic. I'm thinking let's go with a poet shirt and some black slacks for dinner tonight." He claps his hands in front of him, decision made.
As if summoned by his words, there was another knock at the door. A man with bright sky blue skin and a deep plum butler's uniform opened the door, a measuring tape casually thrown over his shoulders.
"Yes, hello good sir. What aesthetic are we thinking for this evening?" he said in a posh accent.
Jason clasped his hands together. "What should I call you? Would you possibly have a poet's shirt and a pair of black formal slacks for this evening?"
"You may call me Jeeves. Yes that Jeeves. I am the personification of the trope of the helpful butler, and as such my power set includes anything and everything that could help me complete the duties of head butler of the High Family's home. We absolutely do have that attire on hand, it would be but a moment for someone to fetch it for us. Now did you have any ideas about future attire?" Jeeves snapped his fingers and a skeleton manifested in a swirl of dust to obey his silent command to gather the requested clothing.
Jason paused for a moment, considering. "How does the Queen usually dress casually around the castle? I know she said she was from an Earth. I don't know where in the timeline her Earth is from and she mentioned that what she was wearing earlier was mostly for special occasions, so I don't want to look like an idiot." He explained.
"Very good sir, she typically dresses in either a less formal toga if she's to be seen anywhere near the public areas of the castle, her armor whilst sparring with her knights, the High Princes and Princess, and if she is only going between her room and study then her far less formal Earth clothing which is a long sleeved blouse and lightwash jeans, typical of the late 1990's and early 2000's."
Jason thought for a moment. He didn't know how long he would be stuck here, but decided that clothes enough to last a fortnight should work. For all he knew, time flowed differently between here and his home dimension. Decision made, he told the butler what he wanted. Measurements were taken, the skeleton arrived with the requested clothes and Jason was left to change into his clothes for the evening. He still is wearing his combat boots because he forgot to ask for a pair of shoes.
Once changed, he realized that he still probably had a bit before dinner and he walked over to one of the bookshelves browsing the titles. There were several classics that he recognized, his favorite, Pride and Prejudice, was there. There were a few as well with Jane Austen's name, but not titles he recognized. He decided to come back to those later and pulled what looked like a collection of fairy tales from the shelf then settled himself lounging in the window nook to read for the next few hours.
#dpxdc#fanfic#dp x dc#dcxdp#dc x dp#anger management ship#hardcover ship#jazz x jason#sacrificial bride au#get it jason#live out your romance novel dreams#I really want to do more#but it's almost midnight here#and I have work in the am
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I genuinely don't think Curly would be as caring for Jimmy as some people depict him in aus where Jimmy gets stuck and burned rather than Curly.
I feel like the realization would truly hit in that moment of what Jimmy did and how bad it was as Curly desperately tries to get him out of the cockpit. He's trying to break in to save Jimmy, but is he? All the thoughts in his head; Jimmy's trying to kill them all, Jimmy's trapped in the cockpit, Jimmy raped Anya, Jimmy's going to die trapped in the cockpit, Jimmy trying to kill them all because of what he did to Anya, and sort of a final Jimmy did this. Is he trying to save him or trying to figure out why? Trying to finally make him take accountability? You can't hold trial for a dead man. Does he want Jimmy to die? Not really, but it'd be easier than figuring out where they go after this. After they drag him out and get his set up in medical and Jimmy refuses to look at anyone but him.
He's the only one who is truly willing to care for Jimmy. I don't think he's keeping him alive for the same reasons, just he can't bring himself to put him down. He wants answers, he wants to be mad. This is the first time he can talk to Jimmy and not have anything spun back at him but he can't get a response. He's never really been able to but for the first time Jimmy actually has to listen and he'll never know if he's actually listening to him this time. It reminds him too much of not understanding Anya. Anya has to care for him and he doesn't want her too, she shouldn't have to but they can't just let him die, can they? Should they? It's easier than hearing him in pain but that's a reminder he did this... even if Curly allowed it to happen.
No one seems to have thoughts on it but him and Anya. They know the reason he crashed the ship but they don't get the logic. Anya does actually, but Curly has to admit he does to. Has to admit he's always known Jimmy's logic behind things, things that need to be "fixed" but he's always taken responsibility and fixed it himself. The first time he really let Jimmy take responsibility and he couldn't, he can't fix anything and Curly know he can't either. He looks at Jimmy and sees every mistake but now he's wondering how many of Jimmy's he's been tacking on to his own. How different are they?
What should he had done to stop it? Maybe this should've happened to him...
Curly doesn't like those thoughts and how they only come when he's stuck with Jimmy, like he's always done to himself. He's way too gentle when he gives Jimmy his pills, too mindful of teeth that always gave him hollow smiles. A tongue that always told half truths, while he held his own. He holds his jaw too kindly and thinks about all the times he's clenched his and smiled for his friends sake. For Jimmy's sake. Jimmy still swallows the pills and struggles, whines like it's not his fault.
He hoped it hurt.
And he's a little scared that he's a little too okay thinking that.
#just i dont think hed sit and that med bay and remines hes staring Jimmy down with anger for the first time in their friendship#whatever tatters of it are left hes letting himself be angry at Jimmy and he cant even give a consequence he doesn't even know how aware or#lucid or able Jimmy is to really grasp all this the sentimental part of him hopes not at all but the part of him thats taken his crap for#all these years that let him get away with so much to him and sadly to others? He wants him awake and aware for every moment like I feel#like hed get close to hitting Jimmy like this and stop himself as he realizes he needs to talk to someone cause he has very no healthy#feelings about himself and Jimmy and the situation and the whole scenerio is defined by him being scared to do the same things that Jimmy#does and just trying to accept that Jimmy was never there for him and he was there for him too much and trying really hard to do right by#everyone else but espcially Anya who'd he have more guilt about than Jimmy obvi but how much of it is him taking responsibility for Jimmy v#the already extreme guilt of not knowing if his crew will get out alive is debatable like he'd want to kill himself but not think he's#deserving and its just him being like okay guys captain curly's got this and then crying while he locks himself in the cockpit#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#captain curly#curly mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#nurse anya#jimmy mouthwashing
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fingon, who was left behind and abandonend by just about anyone in his family at some point, who died alone because maedhros did not return to him in time either. how many times can you be second choice no matter how little it is about you and not have that fester into bitter, bitter anger. how much worse does it get, at some point, that it isn't even about you but you simply matter less than whatever else was more important just then. how long can you cling to the rationale before you always see everyone with one foot already out of the door. how long can you keep loving and loving and loving despite,until there is nothing left to give. and then keep giving anyway because, after all, you know what it's like to be abandonend
#*mine#mona rambles#tolkien#silm#fingon#anyway i'm fine why do you ask#like. important to me that this is not a judgment of the reasons why people left him/didn't return/etc#in most cases it really wasn't anyone's want or even decision#and obviously there were times where fingolfin crossed the ice for him! turgon opened gondolin!! and yet.#and YET. how many times until it starts scraping you raw regardless you know#i just think fingon. the complexities. the nuance. the anger and the abandonment issues and the pretending and!!!!#do you get it. shaking you. god. goddddddddd. my GUY#great wednesday night to have yet another breakdown over him end the day how you started it i guess
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Details in Stan's letter that still haunt me
(how long will I continue thinking about a two page letter that's technically not even that long because Stan's handwriting is fricking large? .....you don't need to worry about that.)
The bro code only shows up in the Lost Journal pages, and to me Stan's message feels like it purposely echoes Ford's "miss you" in the college photo (and for some reason the message doesn't appear in the website version of the photo?) ....or alternatively Stan simply noticed how distressed Ford was about this entire thing and wanted to support him in a way so he can be sappy but without the kids knowing, or both!
Stan's claim about the Oregon lottery contradicts what the Lost Legends website said about Tate McGucket's ability to predict the winning numbers!! ...but also breaking into the Lottery HQ is definitely a very Stan thing to do and it's not the first time small gags have been retconned
Despite spending most of his letter nonchalantly destroying him, the taunt about ripping a dollar bill in half is the only part where Stan is directly responding to Bill. Maybe it's the two of them having similar ways of thinking but it's rather specific considering Bill taunts the reader about it...
And after Bill spends an entire book calling Ford Sixer despite normally using a pretty wide range of nicknames for him, Stan then spends his letter mainly referring to Ford as Sixer, even though post-Weirdmageddon he tends to use a mix of nicknames. And it's not like he'd gotten to see Bill himself for long, let alone see him steal that childhood nickname (that is only used twice in the actual show btw!). Did Ford tell him what happened or...?
With all this and the website's "still on your mind" message, what I'm getting at is my tinfoil hat theory of Stan somehow seeing some of the pages the irl readers saw, even when it should be personalised to the specific reader, and he's been lying about it for some reason. Considering that the book flat out doesn't make an attempt at convincing Soos, I find it a stretch that whatever Bill was telling Stan via the book was an attempt to convince him either.
Wouldn't be the first time Stan's skimmed through a book and lied about what it meant to him.
(...Now I kinda wanna see a story about the family reading their versions of the book and making fun of it while Stan is improvising every single one of his pages and blatantly ignoring Bill's attempts to mock and taunt him)
But also I'm fascinated by the letters that only showed up on the website (aka the Soos+Wendy+McGucket+Pacifica ones). I'm assuming that Mabel had stuck them on after Stan's letter... but they were basically eaten by the book itself because seeing Stan's letter kick-started Bill's breakdown which takes up the rest of the book
#im wearing this tinfoil hat with pride i know something is up!!!!#like three things in one letter??? ...i mean the handwriting is another thing but for another reason that i already mentioned elsewhere#(of course i also love the idea of same coin theory being flat out the reason why stan's perceiving the book differently)#gf meta#stanley pines#stan pines#ford pines#book of bill#bill cipher#also i'm still kinda annoyed that pacifica got a letter over candy and grenda cos like.... she didn't really do anything in w3 lmao#meanwhile grenda literally ripped bill's eye out and the girls were the main ones holding him off!!! give them respect hirsch!!!!#they helped with the unicorn spell!!!! they're an extended part of the group!!!! they saved stan before!! give my girls respect!!!!!!#also some folks are assuming that the 'miss you' message was directed at mcgucket but if it was for him#i feel like it'd be scribbled on the page itself and not be part of college ford notes in the bg (and ford would use a different cipher)#mind you the photo itself is a day after he met mcgucket so there's no reason why ford would direct it at him#they literally just became besties!!!#and this is a ford recently estranged from his brother and is still trying to convince himself he only feels anger towards him#(i saw some saying that ford shared the bro code with mcgucket too and im ??? theres an entire page about him hiding his childhood stuff#i get there's the 'oh disney!!!' easter egg now but ford at that time was pretty touchy about anything regarding stan#(alex saying that if mcgucket had found his stan o war photo ford wouldve lied and#brushed it off as an inspiration to his career in science instead admitting that he's holding onto it cos he misses his twin)#plus he'd show another recent code that wasn't made by literally kids if he really wanted to share one imo#but also j3 is him using them to hide info from mcgucket!!!)#two sides of the same dollar bill#thisisnotawebsitedotcom
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Loz fandom stop being angsty and give the daydreaming kids on big fun adventures with a cool glowing sword some actual whimsy and joy challenge
#It's like the happy media equals angsty fandom and vice versa but like. Video game series about the dreams and adventures of childhood with#A fandom full of angst and abandonment and depression and smut#It's why I don't really stay in the loz fandom long each time I circle back around#There's so much potential for good things and comfort and snuggly warmth and lightheartedness.#Like yeah messed up things happen in front of and to link but kids are resilient beasts and most importantly they fix it#He's literally wearing the Peter pan hat to invoke that sort of eternal wonder that's the DESIGN of the hat that's why it's so identifiable#Fanart captures it a lot. The gorgeous landscapes and quiet moments and dappled sunlight#But fics???? Oh lu fics are just full of miscommunication and resentment and sour interactions and pain and simmering anger#I prefer to read trusted authors because it's so wearing but the problem is you have to go out and find them lol#It's a very controversial belief of mine that every link enjoyed their adventure even if it was scary or sad and would not be averse to#Another. Oh the circumstances they might hate. But link has never been one to refuse the call#That's the POINT they stepped up when the adults couldn't it's their COURAGE that they'd be fastest to volunteer.#Unrelated but post game botk is adhd central you can do literally whatever you want and whatever pace and you just drift around getting#Distracted and teleporting all over and setting challenges and poking around every nook and cranny#Like botw I had over 300 koroks and 98% map completion. I maxed out hero's path twice over. Totk I've just been wandering around#Speed farming lynels like 17 different goals drifting from one to the other as I wish. Still missing the last 2 sage orbs NO idea where#There's like a million hinoxs now tf#loz#legend of zelda#lu#linked universe#ao3
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i actually am a defender of georgie and melanie and basira being mean or rude to jon bc that man really needed to be put in his place sometimes. like i understand that they were also wrong sometimes— basira is hypocritical and the other two could be nastier than necessary, but i literally cannot blame them at all. jon was so out of line sometimes
#WAYY more thoughts in the tags ->#its like people forgive jon for how needlessly dickish he was in s1#and tim gets forgiven for his outbursts in s3 because he was going through a lot#despite the situation being relatively low stakes#but the girls get villainized to hell and back for honestly some very reasonable points of anger#georgie shut down jon coming back to her apartment to talk to Melanie because as far as shes aware#melanie mutilated herself to get away from the institute and jon was attempting to drag her back#mind you jon didnt give her a reason to believe he was doing otherwise#basira was a hypocrite but thats genuinely not the worst thing someone can be#and its part of what makes her character so fascinating to me#yes shes a hypocrite. yes she still gets shit done#and melanies anger is very akin to tims yet she seems to receive the brunt of the hate for it#and while i do think sometimes they were unreasonable with jon#jon was also unreasonable with them at times too#its a two way street and it really bothers me to see people act like these girls are the worst characters because they dared to be mean#pmpkn tma liveblog#the magnus archives#tma#sorry i yap a lot
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hey as someone who struggles with lashing out at people when I'm upset, I'd like to remind everyone that saying that it's out of character for someone to lash out/get really upset/struggle with anger sometimes when the rest of the time they're a super kind and thoughtful person is just as bad as only remembering that one specific characteristic about them and completely forgetting that they're super kind and thoughtful person!
#it actually hurts my feelings sometimes#as someone who strives to be nice to everyone but when things don't work out I get really strong anger flashes#even if I handle some things super well! there's a lot of things I DON'T handle well#fandom used to make me worry that that was all people would remember me by because it was all they acknowledged about Fitz#and NOW this fandom makes me worry that people just don't think both things can coexist#being nice and sometimes lashing out that is#kotlc#fitz vacker#sometimes I feel like I'm indirectly being told that occasionally struggling with anger undermines being kind and thoughtful#or that someone who is really nice would never do that#and guess how that makes ME feel#I'm sure I'm not the only one either
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"Mission clear."
+ bonus
#kamen rider geats#kamen rider buffa#ace ukiyo#ukiyo ace#michinaga azuma#azuma michinaga#kamen rider#userdramas#umbrella.gifs#tokuedit#please do not repost#umbrella.edits#umbrella.posts#just a simple scene that i think helps set up their dynamic well#geats being a step ahead and buffa being frustrated and harboring anger that simmers through his mannerisms before he#eventually explodes bc he doesn't really want to face his feelings and lets them get the better of him rather than talk about it or work#through his grief and anger in a productive way#i'm not far in but i have thoughts
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