#i get embarrassed about my struggles with reading sometimes 👉👈

[hoppinkiss]

my book is holding my attention in a way I haven't felt in ages ;v; normally if i dont have an audiobook WITH the text my mind wanders and I get frustrated re-reading paragraphs and trying to maintain focus but today I just had background music and got annoyed that I needed to take a break. I followed the events of a battle with interest and without accidentally thinking about something else!! this is what I want!!

though I'm a little scared that maybe this is only possible bc I took my adhd meds today 😭 brain please let me read this book tomorrow too

[quinngefail]

Um. So

Wanted to do an inverse of that last drawing set, and the initial plan was for this one to also have an overall goofy tone. But I couldn't think of ways to spin humor into this one (save for the last image) given what I wanted to touch on, so...

I guess here's some divulgence of my post-bathroom-trap Lawrence characterization, but with a weird juxtaposition between Writing and Visuals because I still ended up using the Little Guy art style HRKGKG...

And same as Adam's post, if my writing is difficult to read, it's all in text form in the image descriptions! ^_^

I feel rather self-conscious about this one overall. But y’know, fuck it man. We're posting it regardless

More thoughts under the cut:

So basically... In my mind's eye, this is a man who has developed an extremely guilty conscious following the bathroom trap, and is now hyper aware of the consequences of his actions. He's been separated from his family, and is desperately determined not to fail anyone else; something that especially applies to Adam, and their relationship in general. And despite Adam having long forgiven him for what happened in the bathroom trap and making it very clear that 'I don't hate you, I could never hate you', Lawrence just cannot internalize this, and constantly has this 'it's the least I can do for you after everything I've done' sort of mentality towards far too many things in regards to Adam.

While also having serious bouts of that whole "You're just manipulating him so you can get your cheap validation and feel good about yourself-"

I'll elaborate more when I write my full thoughts out because there is SO MUCH MORE I could talk about but. FOR NOW THIS IS AN INTRODUCTION TO MY SICK AND TWISTED BRAINROT 🙌

Okay and like the overall tone on Adam's drawing set may have indeed been more goofy, but DON'T GET IT TWISTED that is not my perpetual approach to the way I think about + want to depict his struggles and all that. It was just certainly easier to throw comedy into his pieces lmao. And I've also got a whole lot more to elaborate on with him and his 20 million issues </3

And then lastly!! With the final image it's like I IMAGINE LAWRENCE DOESN'T GET AS CAUGHT UP IN BEING EMBARRASSED OVER BEING ROMANTICALLY CHEESY AND SHIT but y’know. Sometimes you're saying "what's cookin', good lookin'," to your boyfriend with no problem. But other times your brain crafts up "MI ADAM-ORE" and you just have to take a step back after actually going through with saying that one. And have your moment of regretting your every life choice. Y’know

Once they both realize + embrace how cringe + cheesy + corny they truly are. It'll be all over

That's all lol thank you for reading 👉👈

[din-miller]

Hey did you know the tbb can purr? It’s totally fact and not me wanting to read about it 👀. Anywho, please justice can I have some purring clones? 👉👈

Purring clones now live rent free in my head.

I’m struggling with a case of writers block so this is more in the style of my tbb thoughts. Hope it’s to your liking!

The Purring Hours

Pairing: could be read as romantic for any of the boys you fancy or could be read as gen. Up to you. gender neutral reader

Word count: 525

Warnings: Mention of the Kaminoans 🤢

A/N: I added Rex because he is the purring king ����

No one told you that clones could purr.

It starts with Crosshair of all people. A teasing scratch against his growing buzz cut has him leaning into your hand, chest rumbling with a soft purr. Then, once realisation set in, Crosshair is across the ship, avoiding your bewildered expression as his own takes on a warning scowl. You don’t mention it, don’t dare say anything but when Wrecker gives a hearty laugh you’re unable to fight back the small tilt of a smile.

Crosshair doesn’t speak to you for a whole week but you do catch him looking at your hands more than once. Again, you don’t dare say anything but the next time you see him needing comfort or a grounding presence, your fingers brush through his small curls without a pause.

It turns out that purring isn’t always a good thing. Sometimes it’s born of pain, of sadness. It’s Echo you learn this from as dull eyes watch an old holo of the 501st. A happier time when war wasn’t so unforgiving.

Echo doesn’t have hair and you're too afraid of causing discomfort because of his cybernetics, so you climb in behind him and tug the clone back until he’s settled against your chest. Eventually, after many stories of the 501st, his purrs become louder, happier. You fall asleep to them with Echo safe in your arms.

Wrecker breaks sound barriers with his purrs, seriously no joke, it’s loud. He never purrs in the Marauder; it’s too small of a space and it hurts Hunter sensitive hearing. On Pabu though, the house Shep set you up in, shook so much with each purr you had to reinforce the whole structure. Wrecker loved it.

Tech never purrs, or at least that’s what you thought before his chest raised and fell with steady vibrations against your palm. It’s a silent purr he admitted, embarrassment colouring his words. You find yourself hugging him more than any of his brothers. Cuddling against him during weekly Batch piles.

Omega’s purring is the softest and most frequent. In fact if one of her brothers don’t hear her purring in a span of three hours they’re checking in on her, making sure everything is okay. Her purring increases tenfold in those moments and it irritates Crosshair. But you know better when it comes to his complaining, because despite Hunter’s enchanted hearing it’s always Crosshair who notices first.

Hunter on the other hand never purrs. Some terrible excuse about him being the leader and he shouldn’t and blah blah it doesn’t matter. It’s a lie and it’s Echo who pushes Hunter to tell you the truth. He can’t purr. The Kaminoans weren’t sure how much the ability to purr would affect his heightened senses. Other clones treated him differently because of it. You wish you could go back in time and knock out the teeth of those assholes. You tell Hunter that you love him all the same.

And don’t get you started on Rex. The man’s a purring machine, twenty-four seven. You had asked if it was a first generation thing, Echo had laughed and said it’s just Rex and his mother-hen nature.

[ninepentz]

*CASE SOLVED*

Update at the bottom

Angus cloud passes away July 31st, 2023.

Unfortunately and unexpectedly, we have found out that this man was unresponsive at around 11:30 am today from a possible overdose. It was just a week after his father had also passed. There are reports that he had been struggling with mental health and suicidal thoughts recently.

I'm curious what happened and what astrological events could have triggered this, so let's take a look at his natal + day of chart. Hopefully it can give us some more insight into what exactly was going on with angus leading up to his death. I wasn't a huge fan or anything but for some reason this tragic event interested me and so here I am following my instincts. I didn't even know anything like this was going on with him so tbh I was shocked to hear about this.. enough about that though let's get into this reading.

First chart is Angus clouds and the chart below that is the day of death chart. For the 2nd photo, in the 'list of aspects section' we have todays transits this side👈 Angus natal this side👉.

We don't have a time of birth for Angus so we will ignore whatever is aspecting his MC, NN, Asc. This also makes this chart reading a little less specific since I have limited information. But we will do what we can.

Sun transit opposing Angus natal moon, uranus, neptune:

This tells me that he was feeling somewhat exposed, uncomfortable, reminded of something from his past with the sun opposing the moon. Every time I have a transit from sun-moon it is rough, I must say. It's like you feel embarrassed, ashamed, too visible.. it's as if someone tore down your home and all that was left is you standing their in what used to be your privacy/safe space. Your ego is somewhat hit with this sun transit and the moon is our deep inner, habitual self.

It could be also straight forward and be describing his relationship with his father (sun) and the memories that it's bringing up (moon), since his father passed.

His natal uranus is transiting into the 5th house, to me the 5th house represents our childhood, who we were as children, our inner child/creativity, what we do for fun and much more than that which you can look up in the link below.

But this could explain that angus fathers death really shocked him and came out of no where. This could explain that an unexpected shift of events caused him to go back to his past, childhood, the family and their pasts. At the time of his death he had been staying at his childhood home trying to recover from his dad's passing so, you can probably imagine all the memories that come with being back where you 1st started in your old neighborhood, your old bedroom, every item that was left over from your past. Such as, old toys, old personal items/notebooks/clothing/treasured things, his father's belongings and what he left behind in this world. You start to see the world very differently when someone you were really close too, who you have so many memories with, who you hugged, loved, and spoke to all of a sudden is just gone forever. Thankfully I don't know that feeling yet but just imagining it is brutal. So that's what I think the 5th house could be relating to in this situation. It was an event that causes him to think/face something unexpected from his past.

Sun opposite neptune, he was struggling bad with this transit to the point where he was unable to see things clearly. He may have been doing a lot of drugs to cope with this, addictions, confusion, lack of boundaries, blurred lines bubbling up. This transit in general would describe someone who's confused or unclear about their own identity. As if they don't fully understand who they are as a person or that they even exsist sometimes. They don't have a strong sense of self, just lost and kinda isolated. Maybe his dad was a strong figure in his life who provided him some kind of stability and was a grounding presence in his life.. so this situation made him feel as if he lost that. Also I think that this transit could describe someone being unaware of their ego self, so maybe angus was being a bit reckless and making bad decisions.. he wasn't in his right mind and if he was in a better space he wouldn't have wanted this outcome. It was as if his triggers were coming out and he couldn't control them, something triggered him to do drugs, something triggered him to regress back to an unhealthy version of himself.

I didn't find any information about his father's cause of death but will update when I do

Chiron transit square natal sun:

I think maybe he had been feeling like he wasn't doing enough to put himself our there and fulfill his potential. He was ambitious but for some reason something was getting in the way, making him feel weak, discouraged, sad.

Natal saturn transiting into the 8th house:

This tells me his process of death may have been slow and over time..he may have also became intoxicated to the point of paralysis in a way. It's like his body just stopped, he couldn't move his arms, legs, nothing, as if he was trapped in his own body. I'm curious what he overdosed on but we will have to wait until the autopsy results come back if they ever do.

Natal pluto transitting into the 3rd house:

This one is big on being known for a period of time when ones siblings could potentially pass away.

Everyone was saying how deeply he was impacted by his father's passing and their astrology is definitely showing that too.

Transit moon opposing Angus natal sun:

Like my other interpretation of sun opp moon above, this aspect will have the same meaning. I feel like he didn't want to be reminded of his past. Maybe he was feeling hostile with his other family members or it's possible that he had some kind of guilt of something to do with his family. I wonder if tensions were high around the home. I'm getting the sense that it was also something more than just his father's passing that was causing him pain.

So I went to his IG to find out a little more info about him bc honestly I know nothing. Well I found this video he posted on his page, in the link below and it's a song by someone speaking about the people they lost in their life and how they said and did things to them that made them feel selfish and regretful. If you listen to the song it'll explain it better but that was just the gist of it.

That's crazy to me.. he def felt that way about his own dad, it was posted the same day he made another IG post dedicated to him saying "miss u breh"

North node transit square natal moon:

You know what's interesting to me is the moon in astrology is deeper than just our emotions and comfort zone. It is our habits that we have learned from childhood, it's how we were raised, it shows who someone is at their core. Their habits, their manners, their reactions, the way they show up in the world and interact with others. Heavily moon dominant people will have very distinct personalities and it's a similar thing with venus too just in different ways

What I'm getting from this aspect is that angus probably felt a little alienated in a way, from what I know, seen and heard of about his character was that he always spoke his mind no matter how blunt it was. I remember a video going around of the time euphoria was really popular and I guess fans were going crazy about him and he just told them they shouldn't be so invested in celebrities and focus on their own life. I couldnt find the video, but it was something like that, and my 1st impression was that he was a little rude/judgy for that but nothing too crazy. I guess based on his personality maybe he felt too real for the world, like he didn't put on a front like everyone else does in his industry especially.

It would he easy to feel like an outsider around people like that. The moon is our roots and the opposite from that would be saturn which is who we are when we refine ourselves and become more responsible and mature. Maybe he felt that he was unrefined and not responsible, he just didn't have that same "home" training that it seemed like his peers had. He was different forsure, I was watching some interviews of his, like on the red carpet and the way he spoke to the people interviewing him was just wow, a very unfiltered person he was. I say all this just to emphasize the way that he felt so different from others, moon-NN would be that the moon person feels too raw for the world, too honest to be relatable to everyone else. To fit in you would have to stay on top of every trend and try to be someone others can familiarize themselves with, if you don't do that you are somewhat of an outcast. Maybe he felt this way, he was just too far gone to fix his reputation.

Another thing that happens at his age is we start to become more conscious and mentally developed..personally I know that after 25-26 I was realizing my place in the world, how my actions affected others. Bc before that age you are just a reckless/thoughtless/impulsive teen in a way with an under developed frontal lobe. Hope that makes sense. I can definitely see that reality hitting him.. especially when you are trying to succeed but it seems like no one relates to you and you're not as interesting as you may of once thought.

AS transit square natal sun:

Maybe he was unhappy with the impression people had of him, someone was saying that his character in euphoria is not far from who he actually is irl. So maybe he was feeling too exposed with the sun here and he was kind of a private person who didn't want people to know his personal things.

Neptune conjunct his natal jupiter:

I feel like he was definitely mixing different drugs up with this aspect. Neptune-jupiter aspects are messy, too much going on at once bc both of those planets are about expansion/versatility in different ways. Neptune would be drugs, addictions, confusion, jupiter would be magnifying all those qualities and causing someone to overdo those things. This is common aspect for infections too imo or even foreign substances in however that applies.

Above are the house transits at the time he was reported unresponsive, 11:30am.

Jupiter conjunct uranus in the 8th:

Whatever it was he was doing caused a shock to his system, like a foreign substance or maybe just an overload of it caused his body to do things that didn't make sense. I wish I knew what kind of drugs he was taking but at this time all I know is that he may have overdosed on prescription drugs.

**UPDATE CAUSE OF DEATH CONFIRMED**

09/21/23:

I was curious what could happen to our bodies if we take things like fentanyl and meth at the same time so here's an article I found if you're curious too. Apparently one of them is an upper (high energy drug) while the other is a downer (calming drug) and people often mix uppers with downers to achieve the perfect high. It can send the body mixed signals/confuse the brain, leading to overdose.

So most of this post was written before we had a confirmed cause of death, but as I'm reading it all, it's pretty accurate. Crazy, I had this post hidden bc I was unsure of my own interpretations, and I was feeling a bit unfocused. But thankfully now we have closure on this unfortunate situation.

For now this is what I have and as always, expect to see more updates on this post when I have more information so please check back for those. Thank you for reading if you've gotten this far 🙏

NOTE TO SELF: ADD FULL 'DAY OF' TRANSITS/HOUSES. Need to know what houses everything was in at the time of death to get a fuller picture.

RIP ANGUS CLOUD. You are now in a better place away from all your troubles. I hope you are happy to be free of that burden..

✨️Nine of Pentacles✨️

[lilyrealm]

not yours - tom/reader

👉👈 first time posting my writing on tumblr but i NEED to connect with the tom riddle community LOL... so yes. i have a sprawling self insert au in my head but lets not get into that. ive rewritten this drabble so it can be read as a nameless self insert

edit: girl no one told me i accidentally left my self inserts name *and* tomies name in the beginning of this i am SO so sorry to all.

warnings: dubious consent, smut, asphyxiation, impersonation, gender-neutral reader with pussy, dirty talk

summary: past r/s with tom in hogwarts. after graduating, you lose contact with him and find a new boyfriend. he's great, if a little gentle, but recently he's changed... and you find it intriguingly familiar.

You couldn't pinpoint exactly when your boyfriend changed.

Maybe it was when he started to bring you out on dates again. Or when he'd started giving you back massages. Merlin, he even started spicing up your sex life, which you thought he'd never dare to do. Of course, you weren't complaining. This was the most pampered you'd ever felt throughout your entire relationship.

Which was why something felt off about it. He was a sweet guy, but he'd never been this observant before. And something about it felt so familiar...

"Welcome home," he said, greeting you at the door. You shivered as he bent down to kiss you. His kissing had gotten more fervent and dominant as of late. Not that you didn't like it, but sometimes you had a fleeting thought that it hadn't always been like this. He'd been shyer before. Was he just more comfortable with you now?

He pulled you further into the room, distracting you from your thoughts.

"I missed you," he murmured, sitting you down on the sofa with him. His arms encircled you, trapping you in his embrace. You leaned into him, sighing. It had been a long day, and you'd missed him too. Closing your eyes, you tilted your head up to kiss his neck.

His free hand cupped your cheek, cradling you gently. Then, without you noticing, he'd whipped his wand out to Vanish your shirt.

"Hey!"

"Shh," he hushed against your lips, pulling you close. You felt his wand tracing your spine and you stiffened. While you were pressed against him, his other hand reached into your pants. You let out an embarrassed gasp, because you were—

"Already wet?" He dipped his fingers into you, and you let out a strangled sigh.

"So predictable," he chuckled darkly, so lowly you weren't sure you heard it right. "Are you always this much of a slut?"

You moved your hips against his fingers slowly. He'd started dirty talking a lot recently, too. You didn't say you liked it, but he could see the way you blushed and got wetter for him.

You felt rather than heard him Vanish his own pants, and then the sound of his hand rubbing his cock reached your ears.

"Please," you whispered, looking into his eyes. His eyes, dark and tinted with lust, reflected no light as he entered you slowly, one hand gripping your hip. You leaned your head back to let out a soft moan.

"Fuck, you look beautiful," he muttered. He increased the pace, thrusting in you harder. As your nerves coiled in anticipation, suddenly there was a force on your neck, holding it tightly in place. You struggled in vain to take in a breath, barely managing just a bit of oxygen in your lungs. You cast a desperate look around to see what was holding you.

His wand was pointed right at your throat, and as he turned his wrist turned ever so slightly, you felt your airflow get cut off.

You spluttered as he thrusted extra forcefully, and you almost saw stars. Your lungs begged for air, your hands scrabbled uselessly at his shirt. "St—"

The spell lifted suddenly, and he placed the wand aside, so calmly and deliberately you thought you'd imagined it—since when was he so composed during sex? Barely had you taken a breath when his hand was on your throat. Not as tight as magic, but somehow worse, because you could feel the force shifting with his movements. Every time he pushed into you, he pressed against your throat too. You reached up to grab at his hand, but he was stronger than you, and the heat coiling within you was taking up all your attention.

"Darling, you are a vision to behold." You barely registered the sentence, a lower timbre than normal. In front of you, his brown eyes seemed to flicker red for a moment. Just as you thought you might pass out, he loosened his grip. Oxygen flowed into your lungs, and you took in several deep breaths.

"Stop, I can't... I'm gonna..." you panted, your mind a mess as you struggled to take in air and deal with your approaching orgasm, about to reach your peak.

"Come for me," he commanded, capturing your lips in a kiss as he spilled his cum inside of you. You kissed back desperately, holding onto him as an anchor. He let you ride it out, his fingers rubbing circles into your back. It was a strangely kind gesture, after what he'd just did. Even more surprising was when he noticed the tears in your eyes. He brushed them away gently, and you couldn't help but stiffen at the touch. A less attentive man might not have noticed, but lately, your boyfriend could see right through you.

You breathed in slowly, trying to steady your trembling hands. He turned to cup your face, waiting for you to meet his gaze. You eventually did, and you wondered if he could see the fear in your eyes.

"Did you like it, baby?" he murmured, leaning in close, kissing your throat softly where he'd choked you. You swallowed nervously.

"Could you... warn me, next time?" you asked tentatively.

He held you close and didn't answer, a smile on his face.