#i feel bad for not doing much with this acct but hopefully this motivates me to do more stuff here!

[swag-arrow]

RAFFLE TIME‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

So I was supposed to do a 50 Followers raffle eons ago but ahahaha.... Yeah... My bad.

Simply comment 🪵 to enter! :D

Raffle ends on May 6th! I'll put all entries into a randomizer and the top 3 will be chosen for prizes in order from 1st to 3rd!

Thank you 💚🪵 Stay barkin' swag bros

[ultrvmonogamy]

How are u? I miss u bestie

hey bestie. rn i'm feeling a bit deflated tbh. i'm sure i'll be fine soon enough, but wow it just seems like there's always something bad happening for me here like one of my blogs is disappearing or an acct is being termed or a former mutual is no longer following me or a current mutual is no longer interacting w me or i'm finding out ppl r talking abt me behind my back n spinning half truths into hideous vileness or i'm visiting a mutual's blog n am immediately nauseated seeing content reblogged from the most duplicitous blogger i know of n who's made claims abt me that r the actual polar opposite of the interactions that occurred while literally echoing words i've personally said here abt striving to be authentic n genuine or i'm seeing a former mutual's response to a question abt following ppl back that talks abt how they don't rly do it anymore bc everyone turned out to be terrible ppl n knowing that i'm probably one of the ppl they think that abt but for bullshit reasons or like i'm having warm n wholesome thoughts towards someone for a split second before remembering that oh yeah wait they think i'm evil now n r no longer one of my few real friends if they ever were or i'm being told to kill myself or i'm finding myself afraid to reply to a question by someone who's been canceled for alleged disgusting things but i don't know if any of that stuff was true bc i sure as hell now know firsthand that ppl r well-capable of attributing motives that do not exist n yet here i am now paralyzed n not responding bc i don't if my once thriving but now v precarious existence here would survive the association of even answering a totally benign question n so also thereby better understand other ppl's resistance to interacting w or implicitly endorsing my content simply for the just-in-case-ness of it all or like a sick, sick individual who last showed up in my world a few yrs ago attempting to catfish me by leveraging the death of someone i cared abt showed up again yesterday either again attempting to catfish me or sending some likely unsuspecting minion to do her bidding (unclear which) n like holy hell, u know? well the main reason i started this blog n started talking here was literally to vent n to be raw n authentic n just own all my weirdness n my conflict n my vulnerability n my perversion n my trauma n my hope n my fear n my stupidity n my experience n my insight n then when ppl completely unexpectedly to me began to follow n interact, my purpose for it expanded to connect w ppl on a real level w the parts of me that i'd let starve or had starved willfully whether out of ignorance or naivety or learned shame or simply fear of being know n to thereby find resonance n all the while to attempt for all that i'm worth to integrate it in a positive way n hopefully thereby facilitate others doing the same n maybe just maybe if i'm super extra lucky n the moths happen to flap their wings in just the right manners at the witching hour while the moon's in the right phase to be able to offer smth of worth to the world in a greater magnitude than i've been able to thus far n well i'm not going to stop trying to integrate n to connect n to be willing to stand up n own my shit until the day my heart stops beating n even w what is now at times such a stentorian din of noise that in moments i cannot even begin to tell what key it's all in or whether there's even a rhythm let alone where the downbeat went i am going to keep trying to improvise a harmony [some of which intrinsically necessitates my silence], it's still the place where i seem most to find meaningful resonance w others who r similarly motivated n similarly struggling but yeah it gets to be a little much sometimes..

but how're u bestie? n why do u miss me? do we not talk? did we ever? do i just suck so bad at replying that an anon seemed a better way to get a response?

in any case, i hope ur well, n i probably miss u too 🩵

p.s. sry i couldn't spare much punctuation what w inflation n the supply chaine n all the crimes against humanity etc.

[spookaorionart]

The thing I don't like. And I'd figured out a way to manage this for a while, but now I largely just don't use social media At All.

Is. That, in order to keep up with most of my friends, or acquaintances, or people i know, I need to be using 3 or 4 or more social media platforms regularly. And if I Don't do that, I'm left in the dark about everyone's lives.

But if I DO decide to use social medias, they eat my data, they eat my time, they eat my motivation, etc. There's not one out there right now I personally can use and come away with the same level of energy I had when I went in; I'm always drained or upset or angry. Which, I know is what the apps are generally designed for, I just can't deal with it. I (and most people I think!) have a lot of very upsetting stuff happening constantly in my daily life, and when my "catching up with friends/socializing" replacement time is only adding to that... it really deincentivises it for me.

So I can't bring myself to use much social media right now and it's interesting and upsetting just how much of my friends' lives I'm missing.

I'm also having Worse Health Issues Than Normal, so I'm unable to be as present as I'd like in general. I'm extraordinarily flaky. That is probably contributing to this feeling. But I also know that I was feeling a sense of... drifting? As soon as I stopped using social media (specifically x lmao). I still check in on Instagram sometimes, but it's overwhelming and puts a bad taste in my mouth. Here... I can't get the hang of it, lol. It's also overwhelming, and I don't understand it. Mastodon made me want to cry just trying to sign up, and any of the newer platforms... idk it's all messy and I'm tired.

Is this how you guys felt about MySpace? I was too young for that, I thought my cousin who made an acct before he was 14 was gonna go to jail.

Is this platform even for personal stuff/blogging? Everyone says you can't use it wrong but I'm pretty sure that you can lol; the number of long form sad boy posts like this I've written out and then deleted bc I'm pretty sure this place is just for memes and art and fandom, and also nobody should know your feelings on the internet, as a rule.

Though, this is all just Me Problems. If you read it... now you know I guess. I can't draw right now because I can't hold a pen/whatever else (I'm having nerve problems and problems controlling my body correctly? I think?) so I won't be posting any time soon. I can't hold a phone for very long because my hands don't work right now, and neither do my eyes, so I haven't looked at anyone's posts or anything. I'm sleeping a lot. Forget about using a computer lmao.

There wasn't really a point to this, other than... I miss people. I haven't been able to meaningfully leave the house regularly since I got sick in 2020. And now I can't find a way to interact online either. It's very lonely. Hopefully I will figure something out, but I do still love my friends, even though I am not showing it very well right now.

[everythingjonsa]

P1/6. I'm Jonsa fan and I root for them so badly but Jon was a jerk last ep, he dismissed every single thing she said, he clearly was trying to avoid her, he was quite irritated by her presence. He was angry bc he interpreted she undermined him but his reaction was out of proportion and completely ooc. I was surprised Sansa kept so calm and continued to talk to him, kindly. I gave so many "f*ck you Jon" in that scene, sorry, I was really angry. In S6 they also didn't agree on many things...

P2/6. (if not all of them) and they bickered too but despite everything they respected and treated each other fairly. He was trying to gain her trust, what happened with his speech “we need to trust each other we can’t FIGHT a war…”? Where all that despise came from? It doesn’t make sense! So I’m getting to my point… here is the thing, wth D&D chose such change of behaviour from Jon’s part? And why is Sansa taking this in such a mature way (she’s hurt but didn’t let that affect the way…

P3/6. she feels ab him)? I don’t think S6 Sansa would be that patient and wouldn’t act with such admiration for him. What is the purpose of all that? I see two possibilities: they are making this to lead to Starkbowl, which wouldn’t make any sense bc we’d have to see Sansa starts taking this in a bad way, which we didn’t, yet, or there is something more than the eyes see, and by that I mean, Jon is really starting to have forbidden feelings for her and is aware of it, that’s why can’t barely…

P4/6. look at her or being close to her. I want to believe it’s the latter bc the former is such a foolish motive for them to split, specially after the way S6 ended, despite their differences, they ended in a good terms, so to Jon suddenly act the way he’s acting just bc she didn’t agree with him in front of everybody, we’d have to see this developing to make it more plausible - it wouldn’t be for me anyway but I think it’d be more convincing. That being said, I hope D&D don’t screw up with…

P5/6. S/J’s caracter (specially hers bc she has so much to lose) in favor of a silly betrayal plot to kill her off. I want to believe they’re doing this for a major reason, whether there is a Jonsa plot hidden, I’m not sure yet, but I hope at least this leads her to defeat LF, her master, and to finally put her name in the players’ list w/o ppl (inside and ouside the show) questioning her actions. That’d be a much more compelling developing arc. I like your blog and the… 

 P6/6. discussions you have here. I’d like to hear your perspective on that. PS: Sorry it got too long, I’m not blog expert so I don’t know how to use Tumblr but I think I need to learn and set up an acct to interact to other Jonsa fans. I feel I’m alone on it bc I know no one in real life to talk ab my Jonsa crazyness. 

Hi Nonny, 

Sorry bout the late reply but I am travelling right now, and am accessing the tumblr app from my Phone. 

Okay, so where do I begin? I can understand your discontent with Jon’s behaviour. Many people are and I have written a post about how D&D probably want us to choose sides between Jon and Sansa in this post -  (X).

I am not going into too much into detail about Jon’s behaviour but i am going to suggest to you to go through these excellent posts by @kitten1618x in this post, by @jen-snow in this post and by @talltalia in this post. There are many more, these three sort of came to my head immediately. Anyway, what I am trying to say is that hopefully, there is a good reason (translating into not so brotherly feelings) for Jon’s rather standoffish behaviour towards Sansa and let’s hope that they sort their differences out. (Or kiss and make out, whatever suits)

I don’t think they have kept Sansa alive for so long just to kill her off in a rather silly plot of betrayal. I am saying this over and over again, BUT SANSA LOVES JON AND SHE IS NOT GOING TO BETRAY HIM. It’s something I’ve believed from season 6 onwards and Sansa’s gentle behaviour towards Jon just reinforces my opinion. I am 99% sure at this point that there is a Jonsa plot hidden in the narrative so I am inclined to say you are absolutely RIGHT!! We are all noticing how he’s turning away from her, not looking at her unless she does something or says something to get his attention. In contrast, he spent the entire of six unable to take his eyes off her. So my conclusion is…

Season 6: Jon notices Sansa, the woman she has become and is drawn to her without him realising it. 

Season 7: Jon’s not sure about Sansa though he does love her and will do anything to protect her, Jon’s not sure how he feels about Sansa, and he is beginning to become aware of it and it’s confusing him and disturbing him.

IT’s progress for JONSA imo. Sansa’s story is about the student surpassing the teacher/master be it Cersei, be it LF. 

Don’t worry about the length of the ask. I can read and discuss JONSA like forever. Thank you so much for your kind words about the blog and you can send me as many asks as you like whenever you feel like talking about anything. It will be great if you can join the JONSA fandom on tumblr though. This ship has so many wonderful people who make this ship lovable and fun!!

Thanks for the Ask!!