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naminethewriter · 11 months ago

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Not So Jolly Christmas

It is once again time for the @sanderssidesgiftxchange! This year I wrote for @authorgirl0131 who wanted a story about Janus and Remus' first Christmas with the Lights Sides as well as some Hurt/Comfort. I hope you enjoy 💛

Read here on Ao3

Summary: Janus and Remus spend their first Christmas with the Light Sides. One in particular isn't amused.

Content Warnings: Christmas, Virgil is pretty mean to Janus, Janus is caught in a self-hate spiral near the end, Cursing, Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending

~~*~~

“J-ANUS!” Remus yelled as he crashed into the door to Janus’ room and before Janus could open his eyes, the other was on top of him.

“It’s Christmas! You need to get up! I wanna annoy my brother!”

Janus groaned and slowly opened his eyes, flinching at the brightness of his room. Remus’ sharp grin was only inches from his face and Janus pushed him away with all six of his arms.

“Yes, yes, I know,” he yawned, slowly sitting up. Remus bounced of the bed, and he didn’t stop bouncing as he circled around the room, not standing still for even a second. Janus couldn’t blame him; this would be the first time in forever that he spends the holiday with his brother.

Patton had invited Janus to join them on Christmas day at the beginning of the month. When he had just raised his eyebrows at the suggestion, Patton had quickly tagged on that Remus would be welcome as well, under a few stipulations. Janus’ brow had wandered higher.

“Yes, a wonderful idea of you to invite us behind the others back, that won’t cause any problems at all!” he had scoffed.

“Wha—? No! No, I asked the others. Logan said he didn’t mind, just that I should tell him early on if you agree to come so he has time to organize the presents. Roman and Verge weren’t… thrilled by the idea but they agreed that we should try to get along, for Thomas’ sake. Roman insisted though that Remus had to follow some rules if he wants to come.”

Janus knew Patton wasn’t lying but he could hardly believe it was the truth. Virgil said okay to him and Remus coming? Ever since he left, things had been… more than a little strained. Sure, they hadn’t had the best relationship even before then, but now Virgil met them with animosity whenever he saw them.

Still, he couldn’t turn down the offer if it meant that Remus could finally spend more time with his brother.

“Alright,” he said slowly. “What are these rules then?”

“It’s just about the gifts!” Patton reassured. “Roman said that Remus can’t get us anything that is alive, rotting, sharp, or deadly. Or any combination of those.”

“That’s… fair enough, I suppose. I’ll ask him and get back to you.”

“Please do!” Patton had beamed as if he had already said yes.

Of course, Remus had agreed enthusiastically, which led them to Christmas morning.

“Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” Remus whined as Janus swung his feet off the bed and into his slippers.

“I do need to get dressed first, Remus,” he reminded.

“Oh, pft, no you don’t! We could both just go in our birthday suits!” He shimmied his shoulders and Janus rolled his eyes fondly. Despite his words, Remus had come to his room fully dressed.

“You said you would behave, Remus. And Patton said that they usually wear their Christmas sweaters, and that we didn’t have to but I like mine, so I’ll go put that on.”

“Ugh, fine! You’re no fun anymore.” Remus threw himself on the bed dramatically as he pouted. Janus didn’t pay him any more attention and disappeared into the bathroom.

He walked to the sink and splashed some water into his face before taking a deep breath. He couldn’t share Remus’ excitement, on the contrary, he was dreading the day more than he looked forward to it. Yes, Patton would do his best to make them comfortable and Logan would be polite as usual, but the other two? Well, Roman would probably be preoccupied by dealing with Remus but that would also mean that Virgil’s focus would be mainly on him.

And that was not an inviting concept.

But he had agreed, so now he had to get through it. If only for Remus’ sake. He again splashed his face with water and got moving to get ready.

When he came back out of the bathroom a few minutes later, fully dressed and a bit more confident to face the day, Remus was crawling along his ceiling on all fours. At least this time he wasn’t secreting slime.

He let himself drop and crashed into the floor when he saw Janus, practically vibrating with excitement again.

“Can we go now?!”

“Almost,” Janus chuckled. Remus’ face fell but Janus knew that he could improve his mood with just a few words. “I have an early present for you.” Immediately, Remus started actually vibrating on the spot, looking at Janus with big eyes.

“What is it? What is it?”

Summoning the box into his hand behind his back, Janus revealed it to his best friend with a flourish. Remus grabbed it greedily, tearing in the wrapping paper and pulling off the lid as soon as he could. Inside laid a thin, green collar with a metal box that kept the ends together.

“Uhh, pretty!” Remus laughed, pulling the collar out of the box with much more care.

“It’s a shock collar,” Janus explained and immediately Remus’ eyes snapped to his.

“For real?” he asked, overjoyed.

“Yes, but—” He grabbed a hold of Remus’ arm before he could put it on and try it out. “For now I have disabled the highest settings. I’m giving this to now because I want you to try and use it to stop yourself from going on your lovely rants the other love so much.” His tone was sarcastic, but his eyes were serious and Remus nodded.

“I get it. Fun impulse control so I don’t fuck it up for us in the first five minutes.”

“Remus—”

“I know, I know. We’re starting small or whatever. I’ll have my fun with this, thanks Banana Bitch!”

Janus sighed but dropped the topic. “You’re welcome. I’ll let you have the full range of options tomorrow, I promise. Now, let’s head to the others before you explode on me.”

Remus whooped, grabbed Janus’ arm and dragged him out of the door.

Janus let him.

This was going to be a long day.

~~*~~

As they arrived downstairs, Janus took a moment to survey the scene before announcing their presence.

(Not that Remus would hold back for his sake, which meant he had until Remus found something to throw himself at. Literally.)

He spotted Virgil and Roman in the living room together, their backs towards him. They were leaning on each other and probably looked at something on a phone together. Patton meanwhile was in the kitchen, humming jovially to the Christmas music playing at a comfortable volume. Logan he couldn’t see, though he presumed he’s helping Patton.

“RO-BRO!” Remus yelled, storming towards the couch and throwing himself into Roman and Virgil’s laps. They both started cursing and shoving at him immediately. Janus decided he wasn’t going to deal with them on his own, so he headed for the kitchen instead.

“Janus!” Patton greeted happily as he saw him enter. “I’m so glad you made it! Remus joined the others in the living room I assume?”

“Yes, he did. Merry Christmas, Patton.” Janus let his eyes wander around the kitchen as he spoke, spotting Logan at the kitchen table, absorbed into a crossword. “And merry Christmas Logan.”

“Merry Christmas to you too, Janus!” Patton laughed while Logan just mumbled, “To you as well,” without looking up from the paper in front of him.

“Don’t mind him, he does one of those every morning and he won’t let the holidays stop him,” Patton smiled, and Janus simply nodded. “Would you mind helping me set the table for breakfast? We’ll do presents first, of course, Roman was already cranky that we had to wait on you to start.”

“Sssure.” The involuntary hiss made Janus flinch slightly – he might be more stressed by the unfamiliar situation than he realized himself – but Patton either didn’t notice or knew not to comment on it as he waved him over to load plates into his hand that he was supposed to place on the living room table.

After only a minute or two they had everything settled and Patton laid a hand on his shoulder.

“Thank you very much for the help, Jan! I really appreciate it.”

“I expect your firstborn in exchange,” he replied dryly and the other laughed.

“But you’re all my kiddos and I don’t actually know which one of you is the oldest!”

“Right.” Janus knew he was being short, but his eyes had wandered over to Roman, Virgil and Remus. Remus seemed to be rambling about something and the other two looked like they would rather be anywhere else. He wondered why they hadn’t tried to stop him.

“Are you nervous?” Patton asked. He was suddenly a lot closer, whispering close to his ear and Janus flinched for the second time that morning.

“No, not at all. Why would I ever be nervous?” Patton didn’t immediately answer but Janus could see in his eyes that he didn’t believe him.

“I understand. But I’ll do my best to make it comfortable for you two, too.”

Janus wanted to bite back, make a witty comment and shrug off the unpleasantness in his stomach but his tongue went dry, and he couldn’t get a word out. So he settled for nodding instead. Patton nodded back and grabbed a plate of cookies off the table.

“Alright, everyone is here so let’s start the day, shall we?” he called, bright and cheery. Janus almost got whiplash from how quickly he had changed his tone.

“Ugh! Finally!” Roman groaned. He grabbed Virgil’s arm and pulled him away from Remus to sit on the other end of the couch. Remus stayed on the floor, a manic grin on his face and Janus could see the movement of his hand in his pocket as he pressed the shock collar remote. The twitch that followed the voltage was almost imperceptible. He remained silent.

“Yes, I have finished my crossword and am ready to give you my undivided attention,” Logan said as he entered from the kitchen. He walked towards the couch with certain steps and took a seat. “Good morning, Remus and merry Christmas.”

“Merry Shitmas, dork!”

Patton laughed uncomfortably at Remus’ returned greeting but didn’t comment on it. He moved towards the Christmas tree that Janus had heard had been created and decorated by Roman. Underneath it sat multiple sets of presents, ten of which Janus had placed there himself during the night, both his and Remus’.

Janus swallowed before moving around the couch to take his own seat. He could tell the moment Virgil noticed him because his gaze felt like a blade trying to dig into him. He gave him only a short glance but that was enough to see the deep distrust in his eyes.

He ended up sitting next to Logan and doing his best to not look over towards Virgil.

The gift giving went mostly smoothly. Patton called a name and that person picked one present of their pile to open. He started with Roman – probably because the prince would have thrown a fit otherwise – and continued with Remus, then Logan, Janus, Virgil and lastly himself. A few presents in, Patton got too distracted by his excitement over what he received that he forgot to call names and Roman just got up, grabbed the rest of his pile and asked who else wanted theirs, too.

The roomed dissolved into loud chatter and yells of excitement. Janus quietly unpacked his gifts – a self-knitted scarf from Patton that had a few holes here and there, a nice bottle of wine from Logan (which he was stopped from opening immediately), a pair of socks from Roman and a blanket from Remus of which he could adjust both temperature and weight. Virgil hadn’t given him nor Remus a present. Janus wasn’t surprised.

His given gifts were received well, too. Patton loved the scrapbook materials and Logan closely studied the motive of the 1500 pieces jigsaw-puzzle. Roman begrudgingly admitted that the fountain pen he had given him was tasteful. He was sure the golden accents and his engraved name helped. Remus cackled manically as he unwrapped his whetstone. His weapons would be even more deadly know, he promised.

At the end only one gift remained wrapped, which Patton pointed out, looking at Virgil quizzically.

“Why’d you leave that one, ki— Virgil?”

“I’m not opening it.”

“But why—?”

“Leave him be,” Janus spoke up, having recognized the wrapping. Virgil stared at him as he said it, his jaw clenched, non-verbally challenging him to agree with Patton and force him to open it.

“But it’s rude towards who gave it to him—"

“He doesn’t have to open it if he doesn’t want to, I don’t mind.”

He’d imagine Virgil wouldn’t have opened Remus’ gift either if Remus hadn’t threatened him to do so with his morningstar. Now Mr. Fuzzy sat with Virgil’s other presents, probably to be thrown into the trash the minute Virgil could get away with it.

(Janus did his best not to think about how much work Remus put into making him.)

Patton looked between the two of them, most likely torn between not wanting to start a fight and reprimand Virgil for being so confrontational.

He settled on, “If you say so,” and called them to the breakfast table.

The tension quickly left the room as they gathered around the table. Roman started bragging about how he gave the best gifts this year which Virgil immediately teased him for, and Remus argued that his had been better. Patton and Logan chimed in occasionally, but Janus kept quiet for them most part. He didn’t want to draw attention to himself again.

The rest of the day passed similarly. They moved from activity to activity (boardgames, movies, etc.) and Janus let the others talk. When he did contribute however, Virgil more often than not shot back with some passive aggressive statements, no matter what the topic had been. Patton tried to get him to stop but Janus waved it off, pretending it didn’t bother him.

Those times Patton didn’t catch him lying.

~~*~~

Then it was time for the last activity of the day. Apparently, it was tradition for the Light Sides to go out to a snowy landscape Roman created to enjoy the chill, drink something warm and light a few sparklers. Janus wasn’t enthused about the idea on grounds that he was cold-blooded and going out into the snow would surely lead to him loosing his precious body heat but he participated nonetheless.

Especially since it gave him an excuse to stay farther away from Virgil.

He took the longest to get ready, as he needed to wear more layers than anyone else. He was in the process of pulling on a second jacket, standing close to the door that would lead him outside to the cold where the others were already waiting.

Well, almost all of them.

Virgil passed him, lightly knocking into him. It didn’t hurt but it certainly got his attention.

“I don’t know what you’re trying to pull here,” Virgil hissed. He stood in the doorway, blocking Janus’ view of the others.

Isolating him.

“If you think you can fool me by playing the good guy, then you’re wrong. I know you. I know your tricks and your lies. And you always lie. You’ve got some kind of agender, you always do. But newsflash, your stupid plans never really seem to work out, now do they? The wedding fiasco for example. You should leave before you ruin this too.”

Virgil didn’t wait for his response. He turned back and headed outside. He was greeted by Logan who pushed a steaming mug into his hands with a smile. Past them, Janus could hear and just make out the twins having a snowball fight that Patton seemed to be refereeing.

They seemed to be having a pretty good time.

Without him.

Janus left.

Before he could really think about it, he was back in his room, shrugging off the jackets, then the snow pants and more layers until he was left with a long-sleeved shirt and leggings. In a daze, he crawled into bed, under his many, many blankets.

Virgil was right. He didn’t belong there. He had been awful to Roman during the wedding affair. To Logan, too, if he was honest. Patton may have found common ground with him but maybe that was build up on false pretenses. He didn’t really know him after all.

Would Remus even be his friend if they hadn’t been stuck with each other for all those years?

Maybe he would leave him too now.

He wouldn’t begrudge him for it.

Remus deserved so much more than him.

He was just a manipulator.

A liar.

A snake.

Unlovable.

Unlov—

“Janny!”

The blankets are pulled away from him and Janus gasped, wide eyes finding Remus, who stood above him with a worried expression.

“Hey there, snakey. Those didn’t sound like nice thoughts to have.”

“Remus?” Janus’ voice was weak and he only now noticed he was crying.

“Yeah, it’s me. You didn’t come outside, so I got worried. C’mon, sit up.” Gently, Remus pulled Janus up so he could sit leaned against him. Then he pulled a blanket around his shoulders. And not just any blanket but the one that Remus gifted him this morning. The weight settled nicely around him and Janus sighed, relieved.

“Here,” Remus pushed the controls for the blanket into his hand. “Put in what you need.”

“It’s already good, thank you.”

“You wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.”

“Okay. Just let me ask one question.”

“Alright.”

“Was it Virgin?”

Janus couldn’t help the flinch. Remus growled lowly but didn’t move.

“He couldn’t leave you alone for just one day, could he.”

“Please Remus, I don’t wanna think about it more now.” Janus knew if he started now, it would be opening a can of worms and as much as Remus would enjoy that if he meant it literally, he didn’t and didn’t have enough energy to do so metaphorically.

“Fine. Cuddles for my snake now, a mace to the face for the emo tomorrow.”

Janus didn’t argue in the moment but they both knew that he wouldn’t let him get that far in the morning. For now, they just sat in silence, Remus holding him in a loose grip. After the tears stopped, he made him drink some water and afterwards offered to put on a movie, but Janus just wanted to sleep.

Remus helped him settle down, sitting next to him and quietly complained about his brother to provide background noise so Janus didn’t get lost in his thoughts again.

Then there was a knock on the door.

Janus really didn’t like how much he flinched today.

“I’ll get it,” Remus mumbled and got up. Janus felt like a coward but didn’t move. He couldn’t deal with any of the others right now.

“Oh, Remus. I didn’t know you were here.”

That was Patton. Why was he here?

“Yeah, well, Janny’s my friend. What’s your excuse?”

“I noticed Janus never joined us outside, so I wanted to check on him. I know him being cold-blooded made the weather less than ideal for him, but I thought he’d come out at least for a little while. And after Virgil said all those things… Well, I got a bit worried.”

Oh, wow.

Patton actually cared.

Janus knew that, of course, but he hadn’t realized to what extent.

Remus glanced over to him; thankfully he was hidden from Patton’s view.

He didn’t want to be seen like this by anyone but Remus.

“Yeah, that was a shitshow. But that’s a discussion for another day, Janny’s asleep and I don’t wanna wake him.”

“Oh! Sorry to have bothered then, I’ll come by tomorrow. And I’ll have a talk with Virgil, promise. I can’t force him to get along with you, but he shouldn’t have said all of those things.”

“Sure. Bye now, daddy.” Remus closed the door in Patton’s face before he could respond and returned to the bed. “You heard all that? He’s gonna be back tomorrow.”

“Yesss. Thank you, Remus.”

“No problem. I’ll let you sleep now.”

Janus didn’t register himself moving until he was already holding onto Remus’ sleeve tightly.

“Don’t go. Please.”

He hated how small his voice was but the idea of having to be alone was even worse.

Remus blinked a few times, surprised, but then he grinned and quickly climbed onto the bed next to Janus.

“Fuck yeah, sleepover!” With a giggle and wiggle he pressed himself tightly against Janus’ back and hugged him. “Gonna cuddle you so hard we’ll melt together over night!”

Janus made a face.

“I’ll make you bathe at least every other day.”

The hold loosened a bit.

“Fine. No melting.”

“Thank you.”

“Sure thing! Melting or not, I’ll always be here for you, Janny.”

Janus couldn’t help the smile that stole itself onto his face.

“Same here, dukey.”

Remus giggled at the nickname but didn’t say more. Quickly after Janus could tell he had fallen asleep as his breathing evened out.

He yawned, getting sleepy himself.

Maybe one day the two of them will find their place along the others, to help Thomas be whatever he wanted to be. But for now they had each other and nobody could take that away from them.

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dumbfandomdoodles · 4 years ago

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So I think cosplay is awesome, and while I’m not super comfy-cosy with putting actual pictures of myself up online, I do draw and this is supposedly a fanart/fanfic blog.

So.

I found some stuff in my cupboard. (fem!)Remus from Sanders Sides, everyone!

(I have two black skirts but I chose the one that is far too short, figured that was on point for him)

I also have a few other Sanders Side cosplays but I didn’t have time to draw them up today and Remus’ was my favourite so I started with this one. Patton and Janus are up next whenever I get around to it!

#fanart #remus sanders #cosplay #ootd technically #i ended up wearing the patton dress all day but still #i actually really like my art style at the moment if i could just get hands right #i shaded stuff and everything!#be proud of me #sanders sides #sanders sides fanart #sanders sides cosplay #remus sanders fanart #fem!remus sanders

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creativia10 · 2 years ago

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Punk with Lavender

Summary: Roman is ready to spend Halloween with his usual group of friends. He finds himself more surprised by their costumes than he expected to be.

Relationships: romantic Prinxiety, platonic brotherly Creativitwins, background romantic Dukeceit, romantic Logicality

Wordcount: 1010

Warnings: some mockery (but it's light-hearted teasing among friends)

Notes: Tuliptober Prompt 30-Oneshots

Part of one-shots. Will have more than one.

Set for Halloween

@transexualfoxprince

Based on @tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors Pastel/Punk verse

Roman smoothed out his costume and looked himself over in the mirror. He smiled. He thought he cleaned up rather well and made for a great dark prince if he did say so himself. The style looked like that of a typical fairytale prince costume. Except the color scheme was black and red. It fit him better anyways.

There was a knock on his door.

“Is his highness ready to come out yet?”

Roman snickered at Virgil’s unintentional irony.

“It’s funny you say that.”

Roman opened his apartment door only for his jaw to drop when he saw Virgil.

Virgil smirked. Virgil made fists and posed.

“Oo, look at me. I’m punk Roman. Totally a tough guy.”

Virgil was dressed like a punk. He was all in black. Roman didn’t think he’d ever seen Virgil lacking so much color. And he was wearing Roman’s jacket, a clothing item Roman let him borrow more on purpose now. He wore a mini skirt over fishnet stockings unlike Roman’s usual leather pants though. Still with boots though, just a bit more angular. The only thing that matched Virgil’s usual aesthetic, was his lavender-colored hair.

Virgil was still preening at Roman’s reaction. Roman blinked a few times.

“You don’t look completely like me,” Roman said. Virgil rolled his eyes and gestured with his head. They started walking out.

“Yeah, I thought it would be more fun this way.”

He shyly looked up at Roman.

“And uh, you look good too. Even if you couldn’t get a good roast in from your costume.”

Roman let out a little huff and put his arm around Virgil.

“I was perfectly fine with just looking good. Especially for you,” Roman said with a wink. Virgil shook his head.

“Idiot. You don’t have to do it for me.”

Virgil grumbled but leaned into Roman anyways. Roman hmmed.

The poetry café has been their group’s meeting spot anyways. The cafe didn’t officially have a Halloween event going on. But, it had become an unofficial tradition to dress up and hang out there around the spooky day anyways.

Apparently this year, Roman was not in on a group coordination effort though.

Remus was also dressed like a punk, but with neon green to replace Roman’s typical reds. He too smirked at Roman.

“Hey Ro, do I rock leather better than you? I bet I look so tough. Oo all this black totally means I’m extra and special.”

Roman rolled his eyes. “I think your neon exterior ruins your point.”

Janus hmmed. His style was closer to Virgil’s current one. Janus wore a dark purple but with a leather skirt, and spiked heels.

“It is fun to see who could be intimidated by this though,” Janus added. Remus cackled and nodded in his agreement.

“Why did you all find it necessary to mock my style tonight?” Roman asked.

“Not everyone,” Logan said.

Roman looked over. Patton giggled. He was wearing a pastel blue sundress, the only one in pastel this time for some reason, which was an odd sight. He also had on blue converse. Patton’s hair was still dyed turquoise though, and his piercings were still in. Patton grabbed the ends of his skirt and spun around with a giggle.

“Oh, I love dressing so differently today! I feel like I look so cute! No wonder you all love to dress like this.”

“I wouldn’t exactly say cute is the correct descriptor for them usually,” Logan said. Indeed, the usual pastel wearers, Janus, Remus, and Virgil seemed offended.

“But uh,” Logan coughed, “You certainly do.”

Roman cooed at them with a smirk, getting a glare from Logan at his efforts. Remus mimed barfing in the background. Logan was the only other one who didn’t seem to be a part of this style-swapping scheme though. He was dressed as…a teacher maybe? Logan dressed like a professional, including a tie.

Janus gestured to the style swappers. “First it was just Virgil who wanted to, he thought roasting his new boyfriend was a good time. Something I can appreciate. Then Remus wanted to join as well. I thought the style sounded fun so I joined of my own volition. Patton didn’t seem to realize the intention was mockery and just wanted to have fun.”

Patton gaped at them.

“Of course, I’m not making fun of you! If anything, I’m honoring your look.”

Logan adjusted his glasses. “Yes, I did not understand it myself. But, it is apparently in good fun.”

“Speaking of, why did you choose to dress in that?” Remus asked. Logan huffed.

“It is different than my usual getup.”

“Yeah, but why a teacher?”

“It was different enough. I didn’t want to put too much effort into this when it is merely for going to our usual venue. I’m not exactly the costume type. Be grateful I dressed up for Halloween at all.”

Patton cooed at him and linked arms.

“Well, I think it still looks good honey. I can see you being smart enough to be a teacher.”

Logan blushed a bit, “Thank you, dear.”

Janus and Remus made disgusted faces again.

Roman looked back to Virgil. “You’re the only one who went far enough as to change your physical appearance for this though, I noticed.”

“Ah, yeah.” Virgil brushed some of his now lavender hair back behind an ear and looked away.

“I thought it worked with yall’s typical punk aesthetic. Plus, I had kind of been considering getting it colored like this anyways. What do you think?”

Roman smiled at Virgil. He gently tangled some of his fingers into the lavender hair as he brushed it out of Virgil’s eyes.

“I think it really suits you.”

Virgil smiled and shyly looked up at him again.

“Yeah?”

Roman nodded, “Of course.”

Roman leaned in for a kiss.

“Alright lovebirds, let’s get going before yall start falling into tunnel vision again.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, but the two of them turned to join the rest of the group to head to their favorite venue. It should be a good Halloween.

#Tuliptober2022 #ts roman #ts virgil #prinxiety #sanders sides #ts remus #ts janus #ts patton #ts logan

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agerestorybits · 2 years ago

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It’s taking forever

Human AU

Agere Roman

CG She/Her mtf Patton. (This is related to the story.)

Roman loved to get swept up in a project. The pure rush of being solely focused on a creative idea and bringing it to life one tiny piece at a time. Slowly seeing his vision come true through bit by bit of work.

However, It had been four days already of him working on this suprise dress for Patton and it still wasn't done! He shot a glare at his broken sewing machine for making this take so long. He would have had this dress done in a day and ready to surprise his best friend with.

Patton tried to go dress shopping the other day only to find all the dresses were either too small or just a glorified bright bag, no shape or style. When they had asked a store worker if there were any dresses that would look nice AND be larger enough, the clerk was nice but explained that they would have better luck trying to shop online. Patton was dishearten and just ended up getting some soft blue flower hair clips and they went home.

Roman had the idea that if they couldn't find the dress, he would make the dress for his friend. Sneaking measurements off of some of Patton's favorite clothing items and then finding comfortable materials that he knew she would love wearing.

Maybe he did go over board with large hidden pockets, (Dresses NEED pockets, How else would his Nonny carry around his little items and him if she had to use her hands for his stuff?) And soft lace not the itchy kind.

It was four shades of light blue all mixed together to give off a fairy theme. Soft, and light, and cute. It was amazing! His masterpiece.

Yet it was still taking so long! Patton would be home any minute and he still had lace to put on.

And without his sewing machine working, he was stuck sewing it by hand which took so long. He had been working on it for the last five hours!!!

He was almost done but he wanted to be done! He kept looking up at the clock and seeing that Patton could walk in at any moment and he was trying to sew up the last stretch of lace, but he was tired and sore from being hunched over the dress and he wanted something to eat.

He poked his finger and teared before crying. He pushed the dress away and sobbed into his hands. Why couldn't he just make something for his friend and not be so slow?

He didn't hear Patton walk in but he did notice when She put a hand on his shoulder and he turned so he could cry into her chest. Patton gently hugged him, sway a little bit. "It's ok baby. You're ok. Nonny's here." She coo'd gently getting him to stand and follow her to the bed so they could both sit down. Roman in her lap sobbing out all the frustration and tiredness.

"Let it out. It's ok. You're safe to cry." Patton said softly, grabbing tissues from her pocket to dab at her little one's face. Masking her concern at how dark the circles under his eyes were. Roman had been working on something for the last week. He often kept what he was working on a secret till it was done just so he would have to admit when he messed up and didn't end up with what he wanted.

But he never ended up in tears looking like he hadn't slept before. "What's happened that's got you all worked up kiddo?"

"I tried! I promise! I did! But I'm too slow." Roman sobbed before hiding his face in her chest. "I wanted it be a surprise."

Patton looked over at the pile of blue fabric on Roman's desk. "We're you making me something?" Patton asked softly, hugging Roman a bit tighter as he curled up and nodded.

"Made you a dress. Cuz couldn't find one." He said making Patton look over at her favorite color of blue on the desk and teared up a bit herself.

"You are so sweet and thoughtful. My little one. I Love it already." She promised. Roman sniffed and pulled back a bit to look in her eyes.

"You haven't even seen it yet." He protested before climbing off the bed so he could go grab the dress and hold it up so Patton could see it. The bottom of it brushed the floor as Roman was a bit shorter than Patton and he had made the dress to be fairly long.

"It's perfect." Patton said, heart aching a bit by just how cared for she felt and the love she had for her friend.

"It's not finished. Lace." Roman said glaring at the tiny stretch that wasn't sewn up yet. Patton gently took the dress.

"Well, maybe I can do this tiny bit and then you can help me try it on?" Patton said, she didn't sew as much as Roman did, but he had taught her enough to do this. Roman smiled and tugged her over to the desk so they could finish it.

---

Patton was holding a sleeping Roman, He was laying on top of her as they laid on the couch watching t.v. His pacifier in his mouth as he caught up on the sleep he was missing. The dress fit perfectly and made Patton feel comfortable in a way that no other clothing ever had.

The pockets were already filled with things that her baby thought she should carry, he was extra proud of himself as she walked around in the first dress that fit her.

Patton held Roman as he slept, starting to doze off herself, as she thought about just how lucky she was to have such an amazing friend.

#Agere roman #Cg Patton #MTF Patton

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reverse-moon · 3 years ago

Note

Sending you one as well :D!

Start writing a story using the prompt: "Why did you say yes?" with any character you'd like and the tag 3 people who you want to continue it. You can give them their own prompts to include :D!

(if you don't like the prompt I can always send another :D!)

*screeches into the void* I know I tagged you in a post but still-

"Why did you say yes?"... Got this in the ball bag- Ack- My Remus slipped- (I STARTED THIS THE DAY BEFORE APRIL FIRST SO NO TRICKS)

The Question on my Mind (Part 1) by Artist-Hope (Intruality[Remus × Patton])

@boopypastaissalty, @warnadudenexttime and uh- @thecrowslullaby (didn't see that coming, didja?)(none of you have to do this but hey-)

Ao3 Link Here!!

Word count for part: 895 words

Remus was very confused as to why Patton had set up an impromptu date in the Imagination. He was even more confused as to why Patton had dressed up the way he was.

Patton, bless his darling heart, was in a rather short powder blue skirt (even for Remus standards), with a cute sky blue crop top that was longer than most and some black thigh high socks with a cat motif on the top part. Around his neck was the collar Remus made him - a black and highlighter green one with a lock that was a shade of blue that complemented the green. For shoes, he was wearing more feminine styled high tops. On his head was a flower crown, blue flowers and green intermixed. His normal Warby Parker's were replaced with round frames that were a matching Caribbean blue. Overall, adorable. But it was so far away from Patton's normal style and the area they were in was clearly preplanned, so Roman had to have been involved in some way, that it really was just more confusing than much else.

The area was a clearing near Roman's entrance to the Imagination that he often ended up taking Patton to. According to Roman, the other Light Sides often came to the clearing as well, for different reasons. But more often than not, it seemed to be Remus taking Patton here. Normally just a nice, calm clearing, it was now covered in fairy lights and other soft illuminations. There was a blanket in one area of the clearing, ready and set for a picnic. And normally, where there was just a bench was now a fairly large gazebo. It was almost large enough to hold a small orchestra. The rest of the grassy ground was normal, though it looked almost like it could change on a whim. Patton must have come up with the idea, while Roman put the things into action here. All this to say, it was really romantic.

Or at least that's what it was supposed to be.

And in the beginning, it really was just romantic- but over the course of the date, it just reminded Remus that he wasn't good at creating sappy or romantic stuff. He was really good at doing the gross and creepy stuff. Things that Patton didn't really like. And that, in turn, caused Remus to worry about the relationship. Patton was practically the opposite of Remus in every way. Personality, style, likes, dislikes- you name it. They were just... So different. How they had even managed to make it three months was beyond Remus. Later on in the night, Remus and Patton were taking a break from dancing to the lingering music that Roman must have set up hidden in a tree or something. Remus had been doing his best to focus on the conversation they were having, just laying and staring up at the stars but he couldn't keep his attention on the words the moral side said. His attention was lost on wondering if he should change his ways, or if-

"Remus?" The sudden hand on his cheek, mixed with the worry in Patton's voice snapped him to reality. "Are you okay?"

"Pat?" He tried to stay calm, tried to keep the panic and fear from his voice. He must not have done a good job, because when he looked at Morality, he felt worse.

"Yes, dear? What's going through your mind?" Patton moved closer, hands taking Remus'.

"Why did you say yes...?" Remus wasn't too sure that this question would make much sense and when he saw the confused look on the other side's face, he cleared his throat and clarified. "Yes to dating me, I mean... I'm totally not your type. Even if you're into bad boys..." He let out a weak laugh. "I mean, the way I introduced myself to Thomas was almost killing Roman." He looked away from Patton, losing his smile. "I just don't see how you, an amazing, 'pure', kind, generous, beautiful person could like a... A trash goblin... Like me." Remus looked between three sets of stars for about a minute, before closing his eyes. He started to count the minutes passing before Patton replied (it ended up being close to 5 minutes).

"You still don't know?" Remus opened his eyes and looked at the blue side, eyebrows furrowed. What did that mean? "Remus, I'm dating you because I love you. Because despite you being... Less than what the ideal would be normally accepted as, you're passionate about your ideas. Heck, lately you've been helping Roman with really good and cool ideas! And, sure, maybe it's weird for someone like me to like someone who supposedly doesn't have a filter in the slightest, but I really find it nice that you're trying to 'behave' around me because you know it might upset me." Patton had put air quotes around behave. "Remus, I love you for you. Not for anything else."

Remus couldn't stop staring. Patton liked how he was... With no change?? Intrusive Thoughts almost teared up at the words.

"That's why I said yes. Because I'd be lying to myself if I said no," Patton finished, planting a kiss on Remus' lips. He strangely didn't taste like any of the food they had that night, Patton's lips tasted more like honey. And Remus loved it.

#thecrowslullaby writing prompts #sanders sides #patton sanders #remus sanders #remus sanders × patton sanders #intruality #sanders sides writing

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 4 years ago

Text

Realignment

Prompt: I love when Remus is a lot smarter than he lets on, so I’d love a prompt where Logan is overworking himself and not taking care of himself and one tic of the clock away from either passing out or having a full on mental breakdown (not the type you can recover from in a day). Remus notices the little signs Logan shows, and hears the intrusive thoughts Logan has. Remus really becomes concerned when Logan’s intrusive thoughts start to involve taking breaks, going to eat properly rather than inhaling granola bars, and even sleeping. Remus storms in and is like “Logan tf????” Then gets hella soft once he realizes the state Logan is in

Thank you for the prompts, babe! I liked this one the best so I picked it.

GUYS PLEASE VIEW THIS AS A C H E C K P O I N T if you've been scrolling for a while (and you probably have) pause here! drink water! get food! walk around the room for a little bit! stretch! do something please! you are very important to me and I care about you very deeply!

Read on Ao3

Warnings: discussions of self-harm, nothing explicit, some self-destructive tendencies and behaviors.

Pairings: focus on intrulogical, background LAMP, DLAMP, DLAMPR, can be platonic or romantic i don’t care

Word Count: 2410

Realignment: to align again.

Realignment: to reorganize or make new groupings of.

* * *

Remus hears a lot of weird shit.

The problem arises when the shit he starts to hear isn't weird at all.

Remus hears a lot of weird shit.

The more appropriate definition would be ‘fucked up like you wouldn’t fucking believe,’ but one of us has a problem with particularly strong language and shit doesn’t have to be censored in a lot of media anymore. Which is so convenient! For some of us!

It’s fucking great.

Anyway. Point being. Fucked up shit.

Intrusive thoughts literally fall under his purview. It’s the fun stuff! The stuff you don’t wanna think about that makes your skin crawl and your eyes pop open at the witching hour and stay awake until the sun rises. That’s Remus’s job.

And it’s like the whole Mindscape is whack-a-mole that he gets to play with! Buttons here and there, squeeze this part and watch the eyes bug out of this part, bap this one on the head, see which one pokes up next. Who’s gonna have nightmares tonight? Who is having a nightmare tonight?

It’s fun.

Point. Right. Right.

It’s normally pretty easy to tell whose intrusive thoughts are whose. They taste different. Patton’s taste like sugar so sweet it’ll fill your mouth with cavities. Virgil’s taste like spiders, crawling around his mouth. Janus’s taste like salt. So much fucking salt. Dry as hell.

Roman’s taste like blood. Problem is, Remus’s mouth normally tastes like blood, so…

Yeah, they gotta work that out.

Logan’s taste like ink. Which is why it took him so long to figure out that Logan was having them. Not just because the nerdy wolverine was so convinced he couldn’t have them—rationalizing them as philosophy principles, come on—but because Remus isn’t exactly an expert on pens. Writing like normal people. Ugh.

Normal people.

What a lie, Janny probably gets a big kick out of those.

No one is normal and normal is boring.

Logan. Right.

Okay, so here’s the thing.

Logan’s thoughts aren’t really…standard? They are to some extent, you don’t really get a whole lot of variety from him—even when Remus has been so helpful in making his room safe for him to be in during bad days, there’s such a lack of imagination there that he wasn’t sure exactly how to feel—but it’s the recent ones that’ve been getting…weird.

Remus chews thoughtfully on the kraken tentacle. He swings up to the chandelier and hangs by his ankles, letting the blood run to his head. Makes it easier to think sometimes.

It hasn’t been very long since they found out…well, since they found out.

Remus frowns. Why is he censoring himself? It’s not like he can’t fucking say self-harm, it’s not like he can’t describe what it was, it’s not like he can’t close his eyes and see it happening again.

Then his mind jumps helpfully to the shocked, panicked look on Logan’s face and the soft, furious resignation on Roman’s, and his jaw snaps shut.

Oh.

Right.

He cares. So he has to be gentle with them.

He growls, swinging himself up to perch on the chandelier proper. He turns the kraken tentacle over and chews on the rubbery side.

The others are delicate. Not that they’re more breakable than any other metaphysical humanoid, but their minds are fragile when it comes to Remus’s side of things. Could they handle the full spectrum of his side of thoughts and shit? Probably, they’re stronger than they give themselves credit for. Should they have to? Hell to the fuck no. But it means that Remus can’t just throw them in the deep end and see if the kraken spits them out whole or in chunks. Could they survive? Absolutely. Would they still be…them? Doubtful.

Remus lets one of his legs go, hanging by one knee as he tips over.

Plus they’re always a little more fragile when it comes to these thoughts anyway. Poking and prodding too much would hurt. Like, the bad kind of hurt.

They’re not supposed to get hurt. Not like that.

So. Gentle it is then.

Right. The others. He has a point, he’s just gotta get there.

Roman…fuck he’s missed his brother. They got—they got so much shit to still work out but they’re gonna do it together and fuck he loves his brother so goddamn much. Roman knows that, he knows that, and he’s always there to pull Remus out of his head when he needs it, hit him with a pillow, or tackle him onto something and hold him tight. He’s—his thoughts taste like blood and Remus hasn’t bitten anything since so that he’ll never miss it again.

But with Logan...

Logan is…odd. It hasn’t been long since they first found out—or rather, they confronted him about it, and Remus hasn’t tasted ink without it disappearing very quickly or knocking on someone’s door to please go get your fucking nerd, please. But the ink has only written the usual suspects, whispering the theorems in dark corners, muttering about the incompleteness of a set, the need for Logic, not Logan, and how to jump through the little loophole again.

It’s not exactly hard for the others to tell.

Lolo hasn’t been looking great. Sure, he’s all pressed and dressed, glasses perfectly in place, tie done up just so, walking around like everything’s just totally and completely fine, but it’s in his face. Object impermanence aside, normally when Remus bugs him, he reacts in some way.

Sass is an emotional response and you won’t convince him otherwise.

Whether it be a wry comment, effortlessly fixing whatever Remus has done to him this time, or even just a look, Lolo does something.

Not anymore.

Now he’ll just kind of…sigh and move on? He’ll fix whatever it is only if it’s directly interfering with what he’s trying to do, or when Patton or Virgil come round the corner and freak the fuck out because you’re bleeding! Then he’ll fix it.

Remus wouldn’t say he’s bored, but he’s worried.

Mainly because the intrusive thoughts…aren’t what he’d consider intrusive anymore.

Take a shower.

Eat something that isn’t just a granola bar.

Go to sleep.

Ask someone for help.

See?

If those are Lolo’s intrusive thoughts, then what the fuck is normally going on in his head?

Remus waits. Waits. Keeps waiting.

The instant his mouth tastes like ink again, with a question of whether or not Logan should take a break, he sinks straight into his shower. He washes his hair thoroughly, gets every single bit of grime off him he can, and puts on the softest pajamas he has—thank you, Roman—and drops himself outside of Logan’s door.

He strains, mouth still full of ink, to hear anything other than the soft click, click, click of Logan’s keyboard.

He can’t.

Fuck.

He knocks.

“One moment, please.”

Indeed, a few seconds later, the door opens to reveal Logan, looking as annoyingly pristine as he always does, surprised to see him.

“Remus? Did you need something? Why…” he trails off as he takes in what Remus is wearing. “What’s wrong?”

“Can I come in?”

“Of—of course,” Logan stammers, moving aside to let him in, “are you alright?”

“Should be asking you that, Lolo.”

“Remus, you’ve just knocked, first of all, on my door and asked to come inside.” Logan adjusts his glasses as he sits at his desk. “This is extremely out of character for you.”

“Uh-huh.” Remus flops onto the bed. “You know what else is out of character?”

“Not wearing your costume?”

“Not hearing intrusive thoughts.”

Logan’s eyes widen. “Has—is there something wrong? Are you not hearing any? Do I need to get Roman?”

Remus frowns. “Why’s it so easy for you to do that?”

“Do what?”

“Care. Try and take care of me.”

Logan blinks. “Because you deserve to be taken care of, Remus. Your needs are important.”

Remus idly toys with a loose thread on one sleeve. “Why?”

“Why? Why are you important?” Remus nods. “Because you’re—you’re an important part of Thomas, you’re important to us, and we care about you.”

“So it’s easy for you to care for me because…you do?”

“As simple as that sounds,” Logan says with all the softness that should be directed at himself, “yes.”

Remus nods. “I’m not having problems with hearing intrusive thoughts.”

“You’re—you’re not?” Logan sighs, relaxing a little back into his chair. “Then why did you say you were?”

“Because the thoughts that I am hearing aren’t really what I’d consider intrusive.”

Logan frowns. “Like what?”

Glad you fucking asked.

“‘Take a shower,’” Remus says, his eyes fixed firmly on Logan’s face, “'eat something,’ ‘take a break,’ ‘go to sleep.’”

He watches Logan’s face tense.

“Sound familiar, Lolo?”

“You—I—my apologies,” Logan manages after a moment, adjusting his tie, “I did not mean to be an inconvenience. You are correct, those are not intrusive thoughts, I’m not sure why you’re hearing them.”

He turns to his desk and begins to fish around for a notebook.

“That is quite intriguing, I wonder what the possibilities for hearing other types of thoughts are, considering—“

“Lolo.”

Logan pauses, turning back. “Yes?”

Remus fixes him with a look, getting up and walking toward him. “They are intrusive thoughts, Logan. The issue is that your intrusive thoughts are about you taking care of yourself.”

Logan freezes.

“W-well, I’m sure that it’s nothing to be concerned about.”

“So either you can admit that was a lie or Janny’s about to get summoned.”

“Remus,” Logan sighs, “it’s fine. As you said, these aren’t what are traditionally considered intrusive thoughts, it’s nothing to be concerned about.”

“No, Lolo, it is,” Remus argues, “because it means that the thought of you taking care of yourself is so foreign, so fucking out of the ordinary that not only does it happen to cross your mind—“ he takes Logan’s chair and spins it around— “but you try to force it out.”

Gotcha.

Logan looks anywhere other than Remus’s face and tries to stand. Only to wobble and crash back down.

“Easy,” Remus says quietly, resting a hand on his shoulder, “you haven’t eaten in a while.”

“But I have work.”

“But you need food.”

“Remus—“

“Logan.”

At Logan’s honest-to-fuck pout, he sighs, dragging the poor nerd up and out the chair and sitting him on the bed.

“Why do you think you don’t deserve to be taken care of?”

“I didn’t say that—hey!” Logan blinks up at him, scandalized and covering his stomach. “Why did you poke me?”

“’S what I do when Janny won’t tell me the truth.”

“I wasn’t—okay, okay!” Logan covers his stomach protectively as Remus readies another poke. “I just…I’ve already asked for help for this before. I shouldn’t have to again.”

Remus sighs and lightly flicks the side of his head.

“Hey!”

“Virgil tries that too.” He stares hard at Logan. “Come on, Lolo, you can do better.”

“It’s not your jobs to take care of me.”

For fuck’s sake…

Remus reaches out and tugs gently on Logan’s tie.

“Remus, what—“

“You taking more books outta Patton’s library now?” Remus tilts his head. “You don’t have to beat around the bush, Lolo, just be honest.”

“I am being honest!”

“You’re not lying, but you’re not being honest.” At the poor nerd’s confusion, he sighs and fixes his glasses on that cute nose. “Just talk to me, Lolo.”

“I—“ Logan sighs and oh fuck why does he look so tired?

Well, because he hasn’t been sleeping.

Or eating.

Or taking care of himself.

Unbidden, part of his conversation with Roman flashes into his head.

“Self-harm can be self-denial too.”

“Lolo?”

“It’s bad enough that I’ve made you all worry about me,” Logan says finally, “I would hate to be a burden.”

Oh, Lolo. “You and Roman, huh?”

Logan looks up warily. “What do you do with Roman?”

“You know what I do.”

Logan sighs. “May at least take my glasses off first?”

“You might wanna change too, I’m not letting you up for a while.”

Logan stretches to place his glasses on the nightstand and poofs himself into a t-shirt and boxers. He sighs and opens his arms.

Remus takes two running steps and tackles the poor nerd onto his bed.

“Ah!”

“Am I hurting you?”

“No, no, just—just a little startled.”

“Mm.” Remus snuggles closer into Logan, his arms wrapped tightly around him. “So. Wanna try one more time?”

Logan sighs, deflating them both to the bed. His head lolls to his left, eyes on his open computer screen. Remus follows it, barely suppressing a growl as he stretches his arm out to save whatever’s on screen and shut it.

“I know what I’m supposed to be doing,” Logan whispers, “I understand the process, I am aware that healing is not a linear concept, I know it’s going to take time, I—I understand.”

Remus looks down, giving him an encouraging squeeze. “But?”

“It’s hard,” comes the soft confession.

Oh, Lolo.

“I know,” he murmurs, leaning down to hug him properly, “I know, Lolo, I know it’s hard. But you can’t try and do it all yourself, you’ve gotta remember that we’re here for you, we care about you.”

“But why?”

Remus smiles and cuddles him tighter. “You said it yourself, Lolo. We care because we do.”

“O-oh.” He feels Logan’s throat work as he swallows. “Thank you, Remus.”

“Of course, Lolo. I’m guessing that sinking us to the living room so everyone else can spoil you is a bad idea, right?”

“Yes.” Finally, finally, he feels Logan shyly tighten his grip on him. “Can we just…stay like this?”

“Do I have your permission to hold you hostage until you fall asleep?”

“Yes.”

“Then go to sleep, Lolo,” Remus murmurs, “I’m not going anywhere.”

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#dragonbabbles #fic #sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #janus sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #roman sanders #logan angst #virgil sanders #patton sanders #self harm #tw self harm #tw: self harm

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goodieghostyarchive · 3 years ago

Text

I am completely redoing the band au, both because I got some new ideas a n d the art is old. Fair warning that this au does get heavy. So yeah, warning for: drugs, alcohol, transphobia, rape, abuse-none of these will be heavily depicted, just mentioned and talked about, and it's better to be safe than sorry

So I'm just gonna jot the ideas down here so I don't forget.

Roman, Patton, and Logan are all in the same band. Remus was originally in the band as well, but left to make his own. He and Roman and their artistic differences and all, as well as Remus feeling as though he was the "back up twin living in Roman's shadow" while growing up lead to the split.

Patton and Roman are childhood friends, Patton joined the second Roman mentioned it. He's always supportive-because he didn't get any support at home, rip. His family did not support him coming out and misgender him even now. Because they're trash.

Logan is that gifted child whose parents pressure into maintaining perfect grades and appearance-and he did so. Until the second the last lecture for the day was over. Man pulled one hell of a Clark Kent and no one realized that the quiet, reserved scholar was also that "flirty goth guy with the resting bitch face". Until Roman found out. And now he's in the band. And now he's finding out that his parents don't actually? Mind how he dresses or acts? So his "act of rebellion" is leaving him with an identity crisis and he doesn't know what to do

Roman-golden child could do no wrong. Social butterfly. All he wants to do is make music with his friends. So busy trying to make people happy that he doesn't realize he'd become a doormat. Very popular around town. Needs to learn to take time for himself, he doesn't have to be everyone's "hero"

Virgil is an enigma. He moved into town to stay with his older brother Remy-after his horrible ex boyfriend outed him as trans to his parents when he broke up with him for stealing his songs-and for manipulating and gaslighting him. Virgil no longer feels comfortable showing his face in public for fear of his ex showing up out of the blue, and so wears a face mask and keeps his hair in his eyes. Main character lookin ass. He loves music. But everything with his ex has left a bitter taste in his mouth.

Remy, Virgil's older brother and fellow "black sheep" of the family. He owns the local music shop and lives in an apartment right above it. He is narcoleptic and has a service dog named Java. Keeps an electric drumset in the backroom just for Virgil to jam out on

Janus and Virgil were friends, until Virgil moved to be with Drake-Drake being the now ex, and had been isolating Virgil completely-when Virgil moved back he didn't find out until he went to buy new guitar strings and saw him at Remy's shop. Janus has always had a crush on Virgil, by the way. They picked their friendship back up from where they left it and things were going great-until Janus went to a party out of town and suddenly Remy is forbidding Virgil from talking to him again. Virgil eventually gets Remy to show him why. There are pictures of Janus and Drake being v e r y close being posted online.

The next time Janus tried to talk to Virgil, he blew up at him. Virgil had confided in him about everything Drake had done and he felt betrayed. What he didn’t know-because Janus couldn't get a word in-was that Janus had been drugged and can't even remember that party. So, yeah. Janus hasn't had his best friend to talk to about something traumatic that happened to him. Fun. He does go to therapy-but it still hurts that Virgil wouldn't hear him out

Remus has tried to join and start so many bands, but they've all been dead ends. Until he met Janus. Now, they're more of a duo but aw well. Who caaares. They mesh well and have been making quite the name for themselves at underground events. Remus still misses his brother-but he's not going back to being in his shadow when he's got his own gig now. Virgil did play with them for a few shows until the fallout with Janus-still keeping his face covered, of course.

Drake is a manipulative, gaslighting, narcissistic asshole. No redemption arc. He has no sob story. He's an asshole just to b e an asshole. He gets a kick out of making people suffer in all kinds of ways. He does not want to change. He's a foul being and if he were real I would throw his ass in a pit and fill it with broken glass and lemon juice

Roman, Logan, and Patton all share the same apartment. Logan's family is uh, very well off and insisted that they pay for the apartment. They gave him an allowance that he never used out of spite and stuck in a savings account while he earned his own money and finishes up college

Roman volunteers everywhere he can in town, while still working part time at a bookstore.

Patton is saving up for top surgery and works all sorts of odd jobs. Mainly dogsitting. He loves animals.

Virgil has online courses and has slowly started to post song covers while never revealing his face.

Now! Onto the Dr.lamp lol

This is going to be a harem. Virgil in some way or form accidentally manages to make all of them fall for him. And he's completely clueless. Because of course he is

Janus already has a crush on him, Virgil finally hearing him out about what happened and apologizing for his behavior towards him helps them bond

Virgil and Patton bond over shitty parents and Virgil helps him to realize some things that really weighed Patton down. Afterwards, Patton is incredibly happy to express himself

Roman spreads himself too thin one day and Virgil takes care of him-even though he didn’t have to. He could have just dropped him off at the apartment but no, Patton and Logan were both out so Virgil chose to stay and look after him. Roman hadn't had anyone go out of their way for him before and the crush started there

Logan, drunkenly, laments about not knowing who he is anymore. And Virgil helps him figure it out, albeit in a smartass way. "Well that's easy, you're Logan." "Yes-but who is Logan?" "Whoever you want him to be."

Virgil convinces Remus to have a talk with Roman. Helping him with his family stuff and helping him realize that he isn't anyone's "back up" really seals the deal.

Virgil will one day admit that he hasn't actually seen his face in a mirror since he started testosterone-a year or so after he started wearing the mask-and doesn't even know what he looks like anymore because it's been so long. Like, four years, maybe. No one pressures him into taking it off, by now they all know the reason why.

But he feels safe around them, so he does. And it's a nice moment. Very sweet

#drugs #alcohol #transphobia #rape #abuse #goodie talks #urnthebanders au #sanders sides

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im-an-anxious-wreck · 3 years ago

Text

A Very Pretty Big Hat, Make All The Other Sides Go "Waa"

Five Times A Side Asked Janus For Attention, And One Time Janus Asked Them

AO3 link

Warnings/tags: anxiety and a bit of loneliness, cursing, a suggestive line from Remus, happy ending

Universe: canon

Perspective/main character: Janus

Side/secondary characters: Remus, Logan, Patton, Virgil, Roman

Platonic relationships: Janus & everyone mostly

Word Count: 4,369

Link to my collection of TSS fanworks

Written for @glass-undrawing from the April Reverse Mini Bang Challenge. Find the art that this is based off of here!

~1: Roman~

Janus was rather rudely awoken by loud —but not urgent, more like excited— knocking on his door.

Janus resisted the urge to groan when he saw that his clock said that it wasn't even quite seven yet, but instead got up and answered the door, rubbing the sleep out of his human eye.

"Roman? What are you doing here, and this early at that?"

"You're going to have a spa day with me!" Roman announced.

Janus raised an eyebrow. "I am?"

"Uhh… fudge, forgot to ask. I mean, do you want to have a spa day with me?"

"What?"

"Ah, sorry, did I wake you?"

"...No."

"Mm, thought so. Anyway, I was going to do some self-care pampering today, but then I thought that you might want to join me!"

"What, was everyone else busy?" Janus couldn't help but snap. No one but Remus ever chose to spend their time with Janus, so what did Roman actually want?

"No, I just…" Roman deflated considerably. "Listen, I know that there… hasn't exactly been a lot of kindness on either side here and I just wanted to… to help heal that, I guess."

Some of the tension loosened in Janus' body and he quirked the side of his mouth up almost amusedly. "You guess?"

Roman huffed. "You know what I mean."

"Yes, I suppose I do. Well… a spa day doesn't sound… terrible, so if you're willing to try, then so am I."

Roman grinned. "Great! Follow me!"

Janus blinked at Roman's sudden change in expression, still not feeling completely awake yet. "Roman, I'm still in my pyjamas."

Roman just rolled his eyes happily. "And if you notice, so am I!"

"...Those are pyjamas?"

"Yes, Pyjamed Python. I mean, sure, they're a bit extravagant, but they're very comfortable! Besides, I got these very nice robes for us to wear, so there's really no point in getting dressed for the day anyway."

"Well, then, by all means, lead the way."

…

Janus knew that Roman couldn't help but be a little bit —or a lot bit— extra, but everything so far had been down-right impressive.

The robe that Roman had created for Janus' was the softest thing he'd ever touched, and was very stylish as it was coincidentally Janus' favourite shade of yellow.

Roman had completely transformed his room into a very posh spa, and they had a mud bath, a swim in a decadent pool, and had just put on face masks while they enjoyed a foot soak of peppermint, comfrey, and lavender.

The thing that surprised Janus the most though was how thoughtful everything was. There had even been a separate, special facemask for his scales. This hadn't been some whim of Roman's, he'd actually put a lot of time and thought into everything. Even the mud had been perfect and quite soothing to the easily irradiated skin around Janus' scales.

Janus looked over at Roman and considered him momentarily. "Roman?"

"Yes?"

"How'd you know that I was going to say yes?"

"Say yes?" Roman asked, an eyebrow quirked in confusion.

"How'd you know I was going to say yes to having a spa day with you today?"

Roman puffed up his chest in preparation to say something, no doubt boastful, but seemed to think better of it, and instead just deflated a bit and said, "Oh, well… I didn't. I really had no idea what you'd say to my invitation. I kept going back and forth on it, but could never think of a conclusive answer, so I decided to just ask you and find out for sure. I just hoped that you'd want to and…" Roman sighed. "And yeah."

Janus just hummed thoughtfully, looking back forward again.

There was a small lull in the conversation before Roman said, "Hey… thanks by the way."

Janus looked over at Roman in surprise. "What ever for? You're the one treating me to a spa day."

Roman smiled a little. "True, but I— okay, sure, I wanted you to have a nice time today… but I kinda also…" Roman sighed. "I also kinda needed some attention and sure, I could've asked someone else, but I am always bothering them and I— I wanted to make things right with you."

Janus hummed. "I see. Well, I'm glad you did offer the branch of peace, and perhaps we could do this again. I could make something to eat and we could put on a movie or something."

"Really?" Roman asked in surprise.

"Of course, my treat. You did provide quite a fun and relaxing day for me today, so it only follows that'd I'd do the same for you."

"I— wow, thanks! Oh, wait, I hope you don't think that I only did this so you'd give me something ba—"

"No, not at all, Roman," Janus said, the pure sincerity in his own voice surprising him a bit. "I'm only offering because I want to, not because I feel obligated in any way."

"Oh, well, good." Roman paused for a moment. "…Wanna paint each other's toenails after this?"

"Depends… do you have yellow and black?"

"Yes I do, Honeybee!"

~2: Logan~

"Greetings, Janus."

Janus looked up from his book, mildly interested as to why Logan was interrupting him, usually Logan didn't talk to people while they were reading unless it was important.

"Is there something I can help you with?" Janus asked.

"Perhaps, um… oh! Apologies for interrupting your reading, but…"

Logan glanced to the stairs, which wasn't at all subtle as they were directly behind him. Janus followed his gaze to see Patton near the top of the stairs smiling at Logan encouragingly and gesturing for him to go on.

Janus looked at Logan just as he turned back and said, "Er, what I was trying to say was… would you want to play chess with me sometime? I understand that you're busy right now, and of course, you absolutely don't need to say yes, but I… thought it might be stimulating for our minds and a way to perhaps, if you'd like, begin forming a friendship?"

"Yes, that sounds pleasant to me. I'd also like to say that—" Janus' eyes flickered to where Patton was still 'hiding' and watching their conversation with interest. Well, he could tell Logan later. "That, if you're not busy, we can play several rounds of chess now. I'm almost done with this chapter and then we can…" Janus hesitated.

Did he really want to invite Logan to Janus' room? Well, he supposed that he could show a bit of vulnerability, especially after Logan had first by asking to spend time with Janus.

"We can set up a chessboard in my room if that's alright with you?"

Logan's eyes lit up with joy. "Yes, that works for me. I'll let you finish your chapter now, and you can summon me when you're ready."

"Very well. See you in a few minutes then."

…

Janus surveyed everything he'd gotten set up. Chessboard, comfy armchairs, everything needed for tea, some pretzels… ah, a fireplace. That's what was missing.

Janus focused on a section of the wall and formed it into a fireplace, fire already crackling merrily on the hearth.

Shifting and summoning things was harder for Janus as he wasn't a creativity, but, and especially in his own room, he still could, it just took more energy.

Janus glanced around one last time. Now everything was ready. Janus nodded once and summoned Logan, who popped up almost immediately.

"Greetings, I take it that you're ready for me now?"

"Quite right. Please, sit."

Logan sat in the armchair to the left and Janus took the right one, snapping his fingers to make the water in the kettle on the side table almost boiling.

"What kind of tea do you want?" Janus asked.

"Ah, I can take care of it." A strainer with loose leaf tea appeared in Logan's mug with a quiet 'poof'.

The smell of peppermint instantly hit Janus' nose. "Mm, I can smell the peppermint. I also see some rose petals and… hmm, may I ask what the brown bits are?"

"Certainly, it's a blend of peppermint and rose as you spotted, and the 'brown bits' are rooibos."

"Oh, excellent choice." Janus poured the hot water over the strainers in both of their mugs, having already summoned his own.

"And may I ask what's in yours?"

"Ginger lime."

"Hmm, I can imagine how that might be interesting, although I've never had it myself."

"It's rather good." Janus surveyed the chessboard. "Oh, is white alright?"

"Certainly, I don't have a preference either way."

"Good, in that case, it's your move."

Logan moved a pawn two spaces and Janus did the same to block Logan's pawn.

"Checkmate," Janus managed to say seriously and despite a smile wanting to crack through, he didn't let it.

Logan looked at the board and then up at Janus in bewilderment. "What? What do you mean checkmate? That's… that's not— what?" Logan ran a hand through his hair absentmindedly, looking absolutely baffled. "We've barely— there's no way that— you can't do that!"

Janus felt his facade break a bit as he accidentally made a small amused sound. "I can't do what?"

"You can't say checkmate when we've only each moved one pawn! There's— I'm not in checkmate! You can't— I— I'm not even in check! Wh— I don't…"

Janus laughed. "Alright, alright. Sorry. I was joking, Logan. I'm aware that's not how it works. I was teasing."

Logan's shoulders sagged as he returned the hand from his hair to his lap. "Oh, thank Crofter's. I— I wasn't sure how you thought— I know Remus makes up a lot of rules when he plays board games but— anyway, I'm glad you didn't— I mean that would…"

Janus laughed again. "That's true, it's important not to get one's game rules from Remus, but fortunately, I know better."

"I—" Logan gave out a small startled laugh. "I suppose that was rather funny. I must've been quite a sight trying to figure out what in Crofter's name you were talking about."

Janus snorted. "Yes, it was funny."

Logan shook his head, still looking amused, and stepped a different pawn out. "I'm glad that you actually know how to play as it could've been quite an ordeal trying to explain that that's not how chess works."

"...Yes, knowing how to play… how chess works… yeah. That's… that's stuff I know."

"...Janus."

"Yes, Logan?"

"You… did you accept my invitation to play chess, knowing that you don't know how to play it, and decided not to or accidentally let it slip by without telling me that you don't know how to play chess?"

"...Well, I think our tea is ready, I'll take the strainers out and put some honey in now."

"Janus."

…Let's just say that Janus learned a lot about chess that day.

~3: Remus~

Janus had been having a pleasant, quiet day when it was violently interrupted by Remus bursting into Janus' room and belly-flopped onto the bed.

"Janny! I'm bored, cuddle me," Remus whined, turning his head to the side to look at Janus.

Janus put his bookmark in his book and looked at Remus, an eyebrow raised. "You're bored?"

"Yes! There's absolutely nothing to do!"

"Well, if you're that bored, why don't you do the dishes?" Janus teased.

Remus groaned. "No, I don't wanna clean! I wanna cuddle!"

"Ohh, cuddle, I thought you said you wanted to clean up a puddle!"

Remus giggled. "Noo! Cuddle!"

"Well, I suppose we could do that instead. Dishes can always be done later."

"Yeah, exactly!"

Janus put his book on his nightstand and held his arms out. "Well, come here then."

Remus threw himself onto Janus and wrapped his arms around Janus like a clingy octopus, resting his face on Janus' shoulder, and sighing contently.

"You comfortable?" Janus asked once Remus finally got himself settled.

"Yeah! All comfy now, Jan-knee-surgery!"

Janus chuckled. "Well, that's certainly a new one."

"Thank you! I just thought of it."

Janus ran his fingers through Remus' curls, scritching gently at his scalp, making Remus' eyes droop as he began to purr happily.

A sudden gush of love for his best friend swooped through Janus' heart. "I… I really care about you, Remus."

Remus smiled, eyes quite definitely closed now. "I love you too, Janny The Manny." He yawned widely before smacking his lips far louder than necessary. "Mm, 'night, Janny."

Janus huffed in amusement. "Happy nappy, Remus." Janus smiled softly down at his friend and closed his eyes.

A nap sounded pretty damn good right now.

~4: Virgil~

Janus walked into the living room and almost considered turning right around when he saw Virgil on one section of the c-shaped couch. Virgil was still a bit prickly around him, but that didn't give Janus an excuse to be rude, so he decided to sit down anyway. After all, he couldn't have any hopes of fixing their relationship if he kept avoiding Virgil.

"...Hello, Virgil," Janus greeted as he sat down.

Virgil's eyes darted up from his phone, barely even looking at Janus. His shoulders were tense, and he appeared to be doom-scrolling as he was flicking his thumb quickly and his eyes were wide but seemed to not be taking in much.

Oh, Virgil was anxious.

"Hey, Jan," Virgil mumbled.

"...Do you want to talk about it?"

Virgil shook his head. " 'S just kinda random."

"Mm, that happens sometimes. Would you like a distraction instead?"

Virgil clicked off his phone and began wiggling his toes in his socks nervously. "Yes, please."

"Alright, do you want to watch a movie together then? You know, for old times sake. I know that watching something with someone used to help you a lot."

"Well…" Virgil glanced at Janus. "How 'bout for new times sake?"

"I— yes, I'd… I'd like that."

" 'Kay, let's… let's do that then."

"Do you still like The Incredibles?"

Virgil huffed, despite his pale face and anxious demeanour. "Of course I do."

"Good." Janus snapped and the TV flicked on to The Incredibles' main menu, the theme quickly bringing back memories of other days —and nights— just like this.

Virgil curled inward even more but looked at the TV screen with interest.

Janus usually prided himself on being observant, but he felt quite ridiculous at that moment, only now realising why something especially felt off… Virgil wasn't wearing his hoodie jacket.

"Where's your hoodie?"

Virgil furrowed his brow, and Janus would consider him to be pouting if he didn't still look so very anxious. "It's in the wash right now."

"...Random, was it?"

"Listen—"

"No, sorry, that sounded much more accusatory than I meant it to be. I wasn't trying to say that you were lying. I meant that I understood a bit better where at least some of your anxiety was coming from."

"Oh, yeah. Okay then."

Janus pressed play on the remote and soon the nostalgic THX sound echoed throughout the room.

"...Would you prefer to wear my yellow hoodie?" Janus asked.

"Really? Is… is that okay? I wasn't sure if that— if I'd still be allowed to."

"Yes, you are." Janus snapped the hoodie into his hands and handed it to Virgil, who quickly put it on. Janus continued, "I— I know we… had our big fight, and that we're still healing from the aftermath, but I'm— I'd like to try and fix things, or maybe start anew. Whichever you'd prefer."

"Maybe we could like, do a mix of both?"

"Yes, I'd like that." Janus smiled a small, private smile at Virgil making himself cozy in Janus' big hoodie, Virgil's eyes transfixed on the television screen.

It wasn't perfect, but it was a start, and Janus was more than grateful for it.

~5: Patton~

Janus went into the kitchen/dining area with his Roman glamour on but paused when he saw Patton sitting at the table, hunkered over a cup of quite definitely not steaming tea.

Patton looked up from where he'd been staring at his tea. "Hey, Janus."

Janus pursed his lips before letting the illusion slip away and drop from himself. "Wh—"

"I could tell it was you," Patton said tiredly. "Don't wanna make that mistake again."

"Oh, right… well, I really shouldn't have been impersonating Roman anyway."

"No, you really shouldn't've."

Janus paused momentarily before saying, "I wasn't going t—"

"Okay."

"...Okay." Janus paused momentarily. "Maybe I should just go—"

"No wait," Patton exclaimed, eyes almost pleading. "You— you don't have to go… please stay. I— I didn't mean t— I mean, I was— I'm sorry."

Janus blinked in surprise. "Hey, it's alright. You have nothing to apologise for." Janus sat in the seat next to Patton. "What's wrong?"

"I—" Patton hunched over and gazed blankenly at his mug again. "Nothing's wrong."

"Hmm, I see. Well, nothing has to be wrong, per se, for you to feel unwell or like something's off."

"...Yeah, I suppose."

"So, what's off?"

"Well… I hope it doesn't sound like complaining, and please tell me if it does, but it's just that… everyone's so busy today, and I know I sound like a selfish child, but I wanted them to hang out with me today. Even… even just one person."

"Well, I don't think you sound like a selfish child."

"What… then what do I sound like?"

"Hmm, I think you sound…" Janus gave a thoughtful pause. Patton sounded lonely. "Like someone who just wanted some company today, but had the misfortune of all your friends— your fam-ILY being busy."

"Oh."

"By the way, you weren't complaining."

"I wasn't?"

"No. Complaining is repetitive to an annoyance and thrust onto another person. What you did might could be considered a little vent, but I'd say you were just answering a question. I genuinely asked what was off, and you answered. It doesn't have to be deeper than that unless you want it to be." Janus leaned back in his chair a bit. "As for wanting even just one person's company, I know you are morally opposed to… well, my entire existence, but—"

"What? That's not true! I just don't like lying, especially to our friends. That's all."

"...I'm Deceit. I am literally created from lies."

"Well… yeah, but it's not like that's all you are. We're all more than just our function, and besides, I've… I've perhaps judged you a bit harshly in the past. I've seen how sweet you can be with Remus." Patton pushed his mug back a little. "Anyway, another thing is that you haven't even lied or tried to trick me today… well, other than pretending to be Roman."

"I wasn't trying to—"

"Yeah, you said… wait, why were you pretending to be Roman?"

Fuck, surely Janus wasn't about to— "It's like cosplay." Damn, he really had to say it in the stupidest way possible. Well, okay then.

"What?"

"I… I know it doesn't really make sense. I don't really get it either, but I suppose I could say that I… don't recognize myself sometimes and… almost forget who I am, ah, that's not— not like actually forget but…"

"Like you're just there and your sense of self is hazy?"

"Yes, exactly that. And, um… I know I probably shouldn't wear others' faces, but it's… it's easier to just be someone else sometimes."

"...Hm, I— I agree that you shouldn't just wear our faces… it's kinda uncomfortable for us, well, mostly when you completely pretend to be them and we don't know."

"Yes, I— I can imagine. I won't do that anymore though."

"Good… well, if you make sure that people know it's you… then I wouldn't mind if you looked like me sometimes." Patton chuckled a bit. "I mean, we do have the same face and all."

"Are you sure? You really don't have to. I know I'm being rather ridiculous."

"I'm sure, and you're not being ridiculous at all! Mental stuff is hard."

"Hah, that it is."

Patton took a sip of his tea but wrinkled his nose.

Janus gently laughed. "A bit cold, is it?"

"Yeah, it definitely is."

"Maybe we should make some more, and perhaps take some of the premade pastry dough and bake it, what do you think? If you don't mind my company too much."

"I don't mind your company at all! I…I actually really appreciate you being here right now. Oh, and tea with pastries that we don't have to make from scratch sounds wonderful! Especially because I don't know if I'd really feel up for full-on baking right now… but you knew that already, didn't you?"

"I… might have deducted that you might not have the mental energy for all that."

"Oh, well, thanks." Patton gave Janus a small smile. "...Have you ever seen Good Omens?"

"Yes, I love that show."

"Wanna watch it together?"

"Sure! Why don't you get the show up and I'll start the pastries and tea, and if you want to come help me you can."

"Yeah, that sounds really wonderful. Thank you, Janus."

Janus smiled before standing up and taking Patton's old mug of tea. "You're quite welcome, Patton."

~Plus 1: Janus~

Janus had never been one to make a big fuss, but he was getting fed up.

Well, perhaps that wasn't completely true, he could still be quite persistent and dramatic when it suited him.

But no matter, he didn't often demand attention, so when he needed it, he really needed it.

He hadn't asked for attention for quite some time now and it was getting to him. He could tell that he'd waited just a bit too long, but no matter, he knew that his fellow sides wouldn't mind. They were quite kind and considerate like that.

Although, perhaps they cared a bit too much for their own good —especially in Patton's case—, but no matter, Janus quite appreciated how close he'd gotten with his fellow sides.

He was as close as ever with Remus, of course, had rekindled his friendship with Virgil, and was even forming new ones with Logan, Roman, and Patton.

Janus was quite surprised at how large his support system had grown over only a few weeks, it'd be amazing to even have two people to have friendly interactions with, let alone five!

Janus took a deep breath and adjusted his dress.

Time to get the socialisation that he needed.

Janus turned the doorknob and slammed the door open, quickly startling everyone. Despite everyone already looking at Janus, he decided to let out an, albeit quiet, scream, "Aaaaah!"

"AAAAH!" Remus happily screamed back from where he was standing on the coffee table morningstar raised above himself, his volume at least three times as loud as Janus'. "Why are we yelling?"

"Just… well, it couldn't be that I wanted to show off my dress and outfit."

"Oh!" Patton exclaimed from where he was on the couch next to Logan. "Very nice!"

Logan adjusted his glasses. "Yes, it suits you."

"Heh, you look like a widow," Virgil remarked teasingly as he sat up and leaned back against the couch. "Uh, but in a good way!"

Remus dropped his morningstar onto the coffee table with a loud 'CRACK', and snorted at Virgil, but still genuinely said, "Yeah, Janny really dresses up nice!"

Roman sheathed his sword and clapped. "Quite right, you look so gorgeous! Ooh, do a spin!"

Janus rolled his eyes in foux-annoyance and obliged Roman, twirling around to let the bottom of his dress fan out.

"Amazing! We need to take some pictures immediately!"

"Ah, excellent idea," Logan said as he stood up and summoned a camera. "Would that be alright with you, Janus?"

"Certainly, where do you want me?"

"Hmm, perhaps over by the window. I think the lighting should be good there."

Janus posed for several pictures and was almost a bit surprised at how well Logan directed each pose. Janus couldn't help but feel a bit giddy every time Logan showed him the pictures from each pose. Damn, he looked good.

"What should I try next?" Janus asked Logan.

"Now flip the camera off!" Remus called from the couch before Logan could reply.

Janus pursed his lips and briefly flipped Remus off instead.

Remus whooped loudly. "Atta boy!"

"Hmm, I think this is my favourite," Logan commented as he adjusted his glasses.

Virgil looked over Logan's shoulder and snorted. "Oh, definitely." He laughed. "I want that one framed."

"Really?" Janus asked. "Let me see."

In the picture Janus' hat had flopped down to cover half of his face, the visible side of his face glaring grumpily at and flipping off an off-screen Remus.

Janus laughed. "Yes, I quite agree, definitely the best one."

"Let me see!" Patton exclaimed before gasping as Logan turned the camera screen towards him. "Janus!"

"Hey, Remus started it."

"Yeah! Give me my damn credit," Remus joked.

"Roman!" Virgil happily called. "I need a big poster."

"...Of Janus flipping Remus off?"

"Well, of course! What else would I want, Ranch Man? One of the Easter Bunny?"

"Well, I was just checking. How big do you want it?"

"How big can you make it?"

"Oh, honey, you underestimate me!"

Logan shook his head and said to Janus, "Are we really not going to talk about how Virgil just called Roman 'Ranch Man'?"

Janus looked at Logan and shrugged. "Apparently not."

"Hm… you should consider asking Thomas to get a dress like that and have a photoshoot in it. It's quite becoming."

"Oh, maybe I will. I— thank you."

Logan smiled at Janus. "Of course. Although things are getting rather intense. Maybe we should step out of the 'danger' zo—" A morningstar flew past Logan's head and Logan's eyes turned murderous as his smile grew tight and overly polite. "Excuse me one moment, please. I have to go defenestrate Remus."

"Good luck!" Janus called.

"REMUS!"

"It was an accident! Sorry, Daddy, I've been naughty!"

"I'm gonna run you through with my sword!" Roman exclaimed.

"Sure!"

"Kiddos no! Virgil, stop egging them on! And where'd you get that battleaxe, Logan?!"

Janus just stepped a little ways back and laughed.

Loneliness, insecurity, and anxiety had absolutely nothing on chaos among friends, and Janus liked it that way.

~The End~

No reposting, likes are nice, and reblogs are very much appreciated! | Taglist (ask to be added or removed): @someoneiwasnt

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5-falsehoods-phonated · 3 years ago

Text

You Don’t Own Me (You Don’t Even Know Me)

Chapter 3

Summary: As the son of a Baron, Roman Sanders always knew that when he married, it would be due to a political arrangement rather than true love. Still, when he is sent away to marry an older, more powerful Earl, he is determined to make the best of his situation. Despite the Earl’s indifference towards him, Roman forges ahead and prepares to become the best husband he can possibly be, making new friends along the way. But when his fiancé’s demeanor turns from cold to cruel, Roman must shift all of his focus to survival, and find a way out of his marriage before it’s too late.

Ships: Logince (Logan x Roman) Moxiety (Virgil x Patton)

Content Warnings: arranged marriage, abuse, attempted sexual assault, murder, poisoning, character death, hurt/comfort, angst

Chapter Warnings: none

Word Count: 2689

Read on AO3: here!

Cowritten with @ironwoman359 masterlist

False masterlist

A sharp knock pulled Roman from a fitful sleep, and he groaned, cracking open one eyelid.

“Who is it?” He called blearily.

“Patton, sir!”

“Come in, then,” Roman said around a yawn, and Patton entered the room.

“Good morning Lord- Roman!” He said, quickly correcting himself. “I trust you had a good night’s sleep?”

“I've certainly had worse,” Roman admitted, stretching. “Do you need something?”

Patton nodded, clasping his hands behind his back.

“His lordship requests that you meet him at the stables this morning for a ride around the grounds. New riding clothes and boots should be in your wardrobe.”

Roman raised an eyebrow. Three days of near pretending he didn’t exist, and now Lord Howard wanted to take a romantic ride around the grounds together?

“Very well, I will be ready shortly,” Roman said, then he frowned as Patton turned to leave. “Patton, wait…”

Patton paused, looking back at him. Roman hesitated for a moment, but the housekeeper had said anything he needed...

“Could I...that is, do you know what happened to my clothes? The ones I brought with me, I mean?”

Patton’s face twisted in sympathy.

“Oh, um...well, I...” he looked away, and guilt flickered through his eyes. “Mrs. Wakefield, she...she told me to burn them.” Roman’s eyes widened, but Patton quickly continued, “I didn’t, though! I snuck them into the laundry when she wasn’t looking...I was planning on taking them down to a charity shop in town when I could get an afternoon free. It...it didn’t feel right, to have perfectly good clothes like that thrown out when someone could still use them.”

Roman sucked in a breath. “There’s one thing,” he said quietly, leaning closer. “A cloak, torn at the hem, is it...do you think I could get it back?”

Patton glanced behind him, as if Mrs. Wakefield herself might suddenly materialize in the room.

“I...if Lord Howard sees you wearing it, I-“

“I won’t wear it,” Roman promised. “And the rest of the clothes, you can go ahead and give away. I don’t want any trouble, I just...I don’t want to lose it for good.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Patton said, and Roman smiled.

“Thank you, Patton, I’m truly grateful. Now...I must admit, I don’t quite know my way around the estate yet. Would you be able to show me to the stables?”

Patton perked up at that, his face splitting into a wide grin.

“I’d be absolutely delighted to!”

Patton stepped out for a moment to let Roman get dressed, and then he led him through the halls of the manor. Roman did his best to memorize the layout as they went; the estate technically was his home now, and he wanted to know it like the back of his hand. Patton led him outside through a set of double doors set with frosted glass and onto a meticulously kept gravel path. As they walked, they passed by an immaculate flower garden and what looked like the entrance to a hedge maze before reaching what Roman assumed were the stables.

Lord Howard was already there waiting for them, dressed in smart white riding pants and a tailored vest. Two men stood beside him, each holding the reins of a horse.

“Ah, good morning Lord Sanders,” the Earl called, and Roman bowed his head in greeting. “Come, let me introduce you to my stablemaster.”

The shorter of the two men beside him bowed.

“Joseph Acton,” he said. “I am at your service, my lord. And this is Angel, and her handler, Virgil.” He gestured at the taller man, who held the reins of a snow-white mare.

Roman nodded to both stable hands, then reached out to pat Angel’s nose.

“She’s lovely,” he said, smiling at Virgil.

“She’s yours,” said Lord Howard, and Roman’s eyes widened.

“I- really?”

“Indeed,“ said the Earl. “I trust you can ride?”

“Yes, I can,” Roman said. “I- you are too generous my lord, thank you.”

Lord Howard gave him a short bow, clearly preening at the expression of gratitude, and Roman smiled to himself as he took Angel’s reins. This may not be quite the marriage of equals he had always hoped for, but it didn’t mean he was unprepared for his situation.

A man like Garret Howard had wealth and power to spare, and everything he did would be in service of either acquiring more or showing off what he had. If Roman wanted to improve his standing with him, he first had to stroke the man’s ego. So as they rode through the grounds, he oo’d and ah’d at the impressive landscaping and architecture, when asked how he was finding his stay at the estate so far he gushed about the size of his rooms and the quality of service from the staff, and at every opportunity, he brought the conversation back to Lord Howard, allowing the Earl to not-so-subtly boast about the size of his estate and investments.

When they circled back around to the stables, Lord Howard swiftly dismounted his horse, and gave Roman a nod.

“Thank you for your time this morning, Lord Sanders. You of course have free reign of the estate. I have much business to attend to today and cannot be disturbed, but I do hope you will join me for dinner this evening?”

“Of course, my lord,” Roman said with a smile. “It would be my pleasure.”

Lord Howard snapped his fingers and Acton hurried forward to take his horse’s reins.

“Until this evening, then,” said the Earl, and then he turned and left without another word.

Acton gave Roman a quick bow before leading Howard’s horse away, and Roman glanced around. He didn’t see the other stableboy anywhere nearby, so he steered Angel towards the stables himself. As he drew nearer, he finally spotted the tall, dark haired boy who had first handed him Angel’s reins leaning against a fence post and talking to Patton, of all people.

“Virgil! Get to work!” snapped Acton, and Patton jumped, guilt flashing across his features. The stablehand, Virgil, rolled his eyes, but stepped forward towards Roman, ducking his head and holding out his hands for the reins.

“Apologies, my lord,” he said lowly, and Roman flashed him a reassuring smile.

“It’s quite alright, sir,” he said as he dismounted. He glanced up to make sure Acton wasn’t listening, then added quietly, “and you may just call me Roman, if you wish.”

Virgil’s eyebrows quirked up in surprise, and he glanced over at Patton, who smiled and nodded at him.

“Alright then, Roman,” Virgil said. “How was Angel for you?”

“Oh, she was excellent. Weren’t you, girl?” Roman asked, patting Angel on the neck. “You deserve a whole barrel of apples for doing such a good job!”

“I do have some sugar cubes saved back at the stable, if you’d like to give her some,” Virgil said slowly, almost warily.

“I’d love to,” Roman said honestly, and Patton’s face lit up.

Virgil nodded to himself, as if coming to a decision, then he turned around, tugging gently on Angel’s reins.

“Come on then, her stall is this way.”

Roman and Patton followed Virgil into the stables, which housed around a half-dozen horses. Virgil led them through to Angel’s stall, then gave them all sugar cubes and baby carrots that they took turns feeding to the mare while he removed her bridle and brushed her down.

Roman held out another handful of treats to Angel and glanced at Patton. Patton was stroking Angel’s nose, but the soft smile on his face was clearly directed more at her handler rather than the horse itself.

“So...you two know each other well?” Roman asked. Virgil looked hesitant, but Patton nodded, a sheepish smile on his face.

“When I started working here, I didn’t know anybody...and, um. I’m sure you’ve noticed that the senior staff can be...”

“Assholes?” Virgil grumbled, and Patton laughed nervously.

“That’s, um, a strong word for it.”

“Not necessarily inaccurate though,” Roman said, and Virgil blinked, clearly surprised.

‘Well, suffice it to say, I had a little trouble fitting in at first!” Patton interjected. “But Virgil was actually nice to me, helped me find my feet, and we’ve been friends ever since!”

Roman raised an eyebrow; based on the way that they looked at each other, he’d have guessed they were more than just friends...still, he wasn’t about to pry.

“Pat, it was great to see you, but I don’t want you to get in trouble,” Virgil said. “You should get back, before Wakefield gets wind of where you’ve been.”

“He should be fine, as long as he’s with me, right?” Roman asked quickly. “Since he’s my attendant, if I ask him to accompany me somewhere, that would supersede any other duties he has.”

“I mean, yeah, probably,” Virgil said. “Still, you don’t know how Wakefield can be...I don’t wanna risk you getting in trouble.”

“And I don’t want to risk either of you getting in trouble, so we’ll make sure we keep our visits on the short side,” Roman said.

“Our...visits?” Patton asked, tilting his head to the side.

“Well, as my attendant, it’s essentially your job now to accompany me around the estate, right?” Roman asked. “It just so happens that I love horses, and taking walks around the grounds, so Mrs. Wakefield can hardly blame you if you end up spending more time than you used to outside the mansion.”

“Oh!” Patton said, his eyes widening. “Oh, Roman, you don’t have to do that if you don’t want to…”

“I do, though,” Roman said honestly. “It’s no trouble. And Angel is a sweet girl who deserves all the extra sugarcubes in the world, aren’t you?” he added, patting the horse on her neck.

“Alright, if you’re sure,” Virgil said. “But you two should still probably get inside now, I don’t need Acton on my case again.”

“Okay,” Patton said, quickly pulling Virgil into a hug. “I’ll see you later!”

Virgil looked embarrassed, but he hugged Patton back and waved to him and Roman as they exited the stables.

“What else would you like to do today?” Patton asked Roman as they headed back inside. “Lord Howard takes dinner at seven thirty, so you have quite a bit of free time until then.”

“Hmm...well perhaps you could give me a tour of the mansion?” Roman asked. “I believe there are several wings I haven’t even seen yet.”

“Absolutely!” Patton said. “Follow me!”

Roman was happy to do just that, and the two of them spent nearly an hour wandering through the house, Patton pointing out various features as they went. Roman’s head spun at the sheer size of the place; it was nearly unbelievable that just one man could own so much. At midday, Patton left him to arrange for lunch, and Roman found himself wandering the corridors alone. He decided to try and find the library again and turned around, only to collide headfirst with someone hurrying down the hall.

“Oh goodness, I’m so sorry!” he exclaimed as the person went sprawling, papers flying everywhere. “Here, let me help.”

Roman got to his knees to help gather the papers up, pausing when he saw just who he’d bumped into.

“Oh...it’s Logan, right? Again, I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention at all to where I was going!”

“It’s quite alright,” Logan said, getting to his feet and pushing his glasses up on his nose. “For once, I was not heading anywhere in a particular hurry, I merely intended to take my lunch in the library.”

“Oh, I was heading that way too!” Roman said. “Or at least, I was trying to find it. Is it alright if I walk with you?”

Logan shrugged.

“You may do what you wish, Lord Sanders.”

He resumed his walk down the corridor, and after a moment, Roman followed, glancing around to ensure none of the other servants were nearby before he leaned over and spoke quietly.

“Roman.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“You may just call me Roman, as long as we aren’t around somebody who might get upset with you for it.”

“Is there a particular reason you prefer not to be called by your proper title?” Logan asked as they reached the library, and Roman shrugged.

“Formality has its time and place,” he said.

He paused and opened the library door, gesturing for Logan to enter. After a moment, Logan did so, heading towards a small table beneath a window, and Roman followed.

“However,” he continued, “I’ve found it more beneficial in the past to be on more personal terms with members of my staff. Everyone is free to be at their best when they aren’t spending half their energy worrying about decorum.”

“Members of your staff?” Logan repeated as he sat down, and Roman nodded.

“So unless you have your own objections, I really don’t mind if you call me Roman,”

Logan regarded him for a moment, then tilted his head forward slightly.

“Very well then, Roman.”

Roman grinned, and sat down opposite Logan.

“So, tell me about what you do! Lord Howard called you his business secretary, what duties does that entail?”

“You...want to hear about my work?” Logan asked, sounding puzzled.

“Of course!” Roman said. “Lord Howard has been...busy, lately, and I haven’t had much time to learn about everything that goes on here at the estate yet. I was hoping you would be able to fill me in, if that’s alright of course?”

“I...suppose there is no harm in that,” Logan said slowly. “Though I’m afraid you won’t find what I have to say very interesting. My job mostly entails keeping track of paperwork, creating and distributing documents, managing the taxes paid to the estate as well as balancing the earl’s personal finances-”

“All that, and he calls you a secretary?” Roman interrupted. “That’s the work of a manager, if not a full business partner!”

“Yes, well” Logan cleared his throat, and shuffled some of his papers around. “Lord Howard would likely benefit from having a manager or business partner...however, he prefers to handle all matters that fall under his responsibility personally.”

“Or have you handle them,” Roman finished, and Logan gave him a wry smile.

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“Or have me handle them,” he agreed.

“So Lord Howard trusts you, then?”

“I would not use the word trust, ” Logan mused. “Rather, he knows I am capable of my job, and expects me to perform it to his satisfaction. Much of the day to day of running the estate falls to me, leaving him free to speak directly with other nobles and officials. I give him a report at the end of each week, and we discuss what expectations are for the next week.”

“Would I be able to get a copy of those reports?” Roman asked.

Logan raised an eyebrow.

“Technically those documents are for the Earl’s eyes only. What would you even do with a copy?”

“All my life, I’ve been preparing to run an estate,” Roman said. “And now I’m getting married in six months, but I’m not sure the Earl even realizes I exist half the time. I don’t want to just sit around and twiddle my thumbs and not even know what’s going on under my own roof. I want to actually do something.”

Logan watched him for a long stretch of time, and Roman wondered if he’d made a mistake, confiding in the man. Would he refuse Roman’s request? Would he tell Lord Howard what Roman had asked for? What would the Earl do if he found out Roman had requested confidential reports without his permission?

“In all honesty, the Earl pays very little attention to what I do,” Logan said, pulling Roman from his spiraling thoughts. “As long as the numbers match up to what he expects. I should have no problem creating a second copy of my weekly reports, if you truly wish to see them.”

Roman grinned.

He had a feeling he and Logan were going to get along just fine.

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#sanders sides #sanders sides fic #roman sanders #logan sanders #pattton sanders #virgil sanders #sanders sides au #you dont own me #ydom

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beauty-and-passion · 4 years ago

Note

Hey! How are you? Just came across your blog recently, and I gotta say I absolutely love your theories!! I’m still catching up, but they’re so well thought out and deeply analyzed. It’s an absolute joy to read through, so thank you for all your interesting ideas!

I love theorizing myself too, and I’ve been wondering a bit about what the upcoming season finale of Sanders Sides will look like. Do you have any thoughts/theories on that?

I believe Joan mentioned we will have another 1/2 Asides before the finale of the current 2nd season. After FWSA (which apparently is playing an important part in the overall storyline according to the team), I feel like we might get an intense 2-vs-2 situation that could revolve around Thomas and Nico. Virgil and Roman on one side arguing Thomas is ready to start a relationship with Nico, and Patton and Janus on the other side arguing against it. Don’t know whether Nico would make a return so soon though, as it also feels Roman’s arc might become a vocal point in upcoming episodes (then again, the two could intertwine).

Anyway, do you have any ideas on how the finale would play out? Could we potentially get some Orange hints? (I am freaking out about him lately so would LOVE some more hints in next episodes lol.) Sorry if this is too long for an Ask Me Anything, still figuring out how to Tumblr. Would love to hear your thoughts!

First of all: thank you, I’m glad you like my theories! And I hope you will keep hanging around, because more will come in the future ;)

Second: don’t worry, this wasn’t a long ask :) it was nice to read your thoughts on the matter, because that’s not an easy one!

Third: o-oooh, what a question! I really love it! But I will also need some time to properly answer it, so I apologize in advance for my late reply.

Before starting, a premise. As you said, there will be two Asides, then a two-parts episode that will end season two. During every two-parts episode we visited the room of a new Core Side and considering we’re into Roman’s arc now, it’s pretty clear Roman’s room will be the next one. That also means this two-parts episode will be focused on Roman.

But Roman’s plot isn’t the only one we have now. There’s also:

The whole “Dark Sides relationship” (yes, I’m talking about you, Virgil and Janus)

Remus (his relationship with Roman, his functions, his future role in the creative process)

Logan and his issues

Considering that those are pretty big themes, I would develop them all in season three and just give some hints for now. There will be time to properly address them all later.

The only other plot I would keep is the one about Nico. During the first livesteam after FWSA, Thomas said he wanted to show how character!Thomas deals with a relationship. So yes, Nico IS a big deal, he will come back and the next big theme will probably be about him.

Having said that, here we are:

My Theories On The Next Two Asides And The Possible Ending Of Season Two.

_______________________________________

THE ASIDES

So we have three Asides and six Sides. Two of them were in the first Aside, so I would take them out for the other two.

We have now four Sides to see. Leaving one or two behind would have no sense, so I think we should see them all, two at a time.

Second Aside: Remus and Logan

Why the next Aside should be about them? Because we need to start talking about the creative process and how it isn’t just a purely “Roman” process, but something that requires Remus’ constant stream of ideas on one side and Logan’s realistic approach on the other.

However, it’s still a bit too early to talk about that: Thomas needs to grow, Roman needs to grow. For now, I would start by showing little by little how Remus’ suggestions can potentially be useful, if properly developed and tamed.

And we can do it thanks to Nico.

Some time passes between the first and the second Aside. Thomas and Nico starts to date, everything is good.

But Thomas is still insecure, because of what Virgil said to him in FWSA: “Will deceit continue to be the answer to all of your problems? Is that fair to (Nico)?”. So he tries to be as much honest as possible with Nico, to the point of ending up being brutally honest sometimes. Nico would be a bit weirded out by this behaviour, but accept it with a shrug.

So, since things are going so well, Thomas wants to make it official. To finally be boyfriends and not just two-people-who-see-each-other-and-kinda-like-each-other.

And that’s where Logan and Remus would come into play. Thomas’ thoughts about Nico would get Remus’ attention and the sudden brainstorming session would get Logan’s. The first would poke Thomas for his less chaste thoughts, all while suggesting weird, inappropriate ways Thomas can ask Nico to be boyfriends. The second wouldn’t tear down Remus’ suggestions, but work around them, show their flaws and how they cannot work.

This back and forth will lead to Thomas realizing what he can do and how. And this solution wil be the good one: Thomas would ask Nico to be boyfriends and Nico would accept.

Third Aside: Janus and Patton

Until now, we saw two kind of cooperations: Roman and Virgil’s is based on feelings and “pushing” each other through their emotions. Logan and Remus’ is a cooperation “in power”: they work well together and we just got a glimpse of how fruitful this cooperation will be in the future.

In this Aside we will see a third kind of cooperation: the most stable and balanced one. We would see how well Janus and Patton would steer Thomas together, how they’re able to talk and compromise, how they’re gradually smoothing their most extreme points of view for Thomas’ sake. And we would see them getting along well, despite their differences.

But why showing it now? Because this would be the perfect moment in time to show it. Because now Thomas is in an official relationship: things are getting real and there are A LOT of decisions that should be taken every day. Janus and Patton’s guidance would shine and prove how a cooperation between Sides isn’t just possible, but it leads to big, better results.

And it would also prove that Roman and Virgil’s fear in FWSA (that Thomas was using deceit to solve all his problems) was without merit. Janus’ power isn’t as uncontrollable as they thought. On the contrary, with Patton’s morals balancing it and when properly used, lying help Thomas achieve more. His relationship with Nico grows stronger.

Things are going well.

_______________________________________

SANDERS SIDES - ENDING OF SEASON 2 PART 1

I’ve got an idea in the back of my mind for a while about how things can get worse and it’s something like this:

As we saw in the Asides, Thomas and Nico’s relationship is going well. Things moved very fast, yes, but they really like each other, so it’s okay.

One day, Nico says he wants to introduce Thomas to his family. Despite an initial peak in anxiety (a subtle way to show us that Virgil has problems with change in general), Thomas accepts to meet them.

Thomas is getting ready with Roman and Virgil. Virgil is - guess what - anxious about this meeting, but he’s also all butterflies in the stomach. Roman is absolutely delighted and keeps circling around Thomas, suggesting him what to wear, what to say, how to move: in other words, the whole “Himbo hopelessly in love” starter pack.

For a while, the meeting is going smoothly. Then Roman and Virgil notice how, once in a while, Thomas drops a lie. Something like “The food is delicious” when it’s not or “what a beautiful dress” even if it’s hideous. And the two Sides get worried. Once again, they try to force Thomas to stop lying, because Lying Is Always Bad and there can’t be true love with lies.

Still insecure and pushed by them, Thomas stops lying. He inevitably ends up saying something offensive/extremely mean and/or he ends up acting so badly the meeting has to end. Nico finds an excuse to justify Thomas’ behaviour with his parents (something on the line of “Thomas is very tired”) and Thomas is forced to leave.

When he comes back home, the discussion is inevitable. Roman and Virgil straight up blame Thomas for lying in the first place, because he wouldn’t have messed up so much, if he was honest from start.

But when Janus appears to defend Thomas and tells them lying IS useful in some circumstances, the situation escalates quickly. The two Sides attack Janus, blaming him for everything and making heavy statements on how deeply he corrupted Thomas/Patton or something similar. On the other hand, Janus attacks them back. They throw words at each other, things are starting to get pretty serious...

And just when the situation reaches its climax, Patton appears. He takes Janus’ side, he explains why lying is useful - especially during formal circumstances like meeting your boyfriend’s family because you want to be accepted, not to be seen as a complete jerk - and he bluntly tells Morality is HIS job, not Virgil’s nor Roman’s.

In this standstill, Thomas’ phone rings. It’s Nico. He wants to talk with Thomas about the evening. Janus suggests a simple lie (I was tired/long day at work), but Nico tells Thomas this isn’t the first time something similar happened - thus reminding us about all of Thomas’ “bursts of honesty” we saw in the second Aside. Honesty that wasn’t seen as such by Nico, but as weird, mean behaviours from the guy he likes.

So when Thomas tries to justify himself with some lie, Nico stops him. He tells Thomas he thought about a lot of stuff, after the meeting ended. He thought about their relationship. He thought about Thomas’ behaviour. Maybe they should’ve dated more, before becoming boyfriends. Maybe they moved too fast. Maybe introducing Thomas to his parents was the wrong choice. Maybe they should think a bit more. And maybe they should take some time for themselves to think about what they want to do, before going further with this relationship.

Nico hangs up. Janus is speechless. Thomas is on the verge of crying. Patton is heartbroken. Virgil is shocked.

And Roman is absolutely devastated. The love he wanted so badly, this happiness he desperately needed, is now in danger. Instead of strengthening the relationship, everything he did only managed to worsen it.

Roman sinks down and locks himself in his room.

_______________________________________

SANDERS SIDES - ENDING OF SEASON 2 PART 2

We already had a Side ducking out and a Side welcoming the others in his room so, for this third time, we should try something different. And what’s better than Thomas & his Sides trying to break into Roman’s room?

Remus might appear for a while, just to help them get inside and leave. There are already a lot of issues Roman has to face now: his relationship with Remus can wait season 3.

So we have Thomas, Virgil, Patton and Janus all in Roman’s room. And the confrontation can finally take place.

Roman will talk about his issues, his low self-esteem and how he feels constrained by Patton’s morals. He will finally admit how he desperately wanted to go to the callback and how confused he was by morals, when he first sided with Janus, only to be blamed for not siding with him in the following episode. He would start seeing the problem with his black/white mentality and we would have a nice, mature moment with Patton apologizing for giving Roman this mentality - while promising he will grow to be a better Morality. We would also have Roman and Janus properly apologize to each other for everything they said and finally work things out.

And we can end it like this. It could be a nice ending, with some conflicts solved, others still to solve and a lot of hope for the future. Patton would feel even more motivated to keep up with his growth, because he’s not doing it just for himself but for Roman too. Roman would feel better, because now he knows no one will blame or mock him for his insecurities - on the contrary, they would still be by his side no matter what. Janus would learn that cooperation is necessary and that he should keep doing it, because this is the right choice.

And Virgil... well, Virgil would drop hints everywhere about his upcoming “second arc”.

In the first livestream after FWSA, Thomas hinted at a possible “second arc” for Virgil. So, since we have a whole season to fill, I would move Virgil’s arc, his confrontation with Janus and all the dark sides’ dynamics into the beginning of the third season. For now, Virgil may hint at a future confrontation with Janus that should happen in the first episode of season 3.

And what about Thomas?

Thomas would accept Nico’s decision and write him that he will take this time to become a better man. We may even close the episode with Nico smiling for this message, proving that he’s not mad at Thomas, he still loves him and that their relationship isn’t ended at all.

Then, we would have the end card.

And the end card would feature the Side I purposely took away from the whole season two finale. Logan.

After starring in the second Aside, Logan should completely disappear for the following two episodes and for the finale. No one should mention him or even think about him. He wouldn’t appear at all. Until now.

We would see him in a room, looking at the last episode of season 2 on Youtube. His face would be completely expressionless and he wouldn’t say a word, because the only voices would be the ones coming from the pc. The camera would slightly move to show a figure behind him. A small refocus of the camera on a little orange accent on this figure’s clothes.

And bam, the end. No explanations, no voices, nothing else. Just this. Because this would drive the fandom insane. Did Logan know Orange was behind him? Were they watching the episode together? Was Orange trying to kill him or what? What would happen? All questions that would accompany us while waiting for season three.

_______________________________________

And this is how I think the next Asides and the ending of season two will play out. Of course this is pure speculation and the next Aside might be about something completely new that makes my whole plot useless - but hey, that would mean a whole new theory to elaborate :D

In the meantime, I hope you enjoyed my thoughts! And for all the readers, well, feel free to add your own thoughts here about how the events will play out! Maybe one of us will get them right, who knows?

#sanders sides #ask #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #orange side #thank you SO MUCH for this ask #I had a lot of fun writing this down #I've had some ideas for a while #and now I got the chance to babble about them :P #can't wait to read about your ideas #It'll be fun #sanders sides theory

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cesabutterflywrites · 3 years ago

Text

The Duke of the Bay: Part 8

[Spotify Playlist] [Youtube Playlist]

First Part, Ao3 Link, Next Part (Coming Soon)

Story Warnings: Guns, threats, alcohol, violence homosexual slang used pejoratively and positively, internalized homophobia, ask me to add any if need be

Chapter Warnings: This is a heavy chapter. Violence is only implied, but the implications have a heavy impact. Read with caution.

Chapter Word Count: 3839

Summary: Patton O’Hearty was a great detective. Most people didn’t take him for one at first glance, especially when he dressed casual. He was abnormally chipper; he thought everything was the cat’s pajamas. He had a smile for everyone he met. He was always tipping his hat at the dames and gents when he walked the streets of the Bay Area.

The only person he could never catch was the leader of the planted mob in Emeryville, nicknamed The Duke. The Duke was good at hiding his dealings and joints well, and he rarely had a snitch in his ranks. The few who tried, well, somehow they disappeared before they could give the police any substantial information. He was well hidden, but popular among the residents of the town. People talked boldly of his rambunctious parties, never revealing the locations though. He was hard to catch, to say the least.

So what happens, when instead, the detective is the one that’s caught?

The dawn came as it always did- a soft gray and orange haze streaking in with the marine layer over the water of the San Francisco Bay. Roman de Rossi had a lovely view of it from his family mansion on San Pablo Avenue. A mansion that felt too big lately, with too high of a price to keep.

Roman rolled over to get out of bed when he bumped into something hard and stiff. His heart skipped a beat when he heard his wife cry out.

“Jeeze, Ro, trying to be the first at the breakfast table again?” Rosalie’s voice was gruff. She rubbed the spot on her back where Roman had bumped. “I already got one slugger goin’ for my kidneys.”

Roman rolled his eyes, though he was relieved he hadn’t hurt Rosalie. “Rose, why aren’t you in your bed?”

“Because I needed the warmth and comfort of my husband.” she mumbled sarcastically into her pillow, already on her way back to sleep.

All exhausted bitterness left him at the sound of her snores. At the beginning of their marriage it had been incredibly overbearing for him-to the point they shared separate beds- but with the rising threat of the gangs, he never knew when he’d see the last of his wife. After yesterday, there wasn’t even a certainty that he’d make it to see the birth of his twins.

Carefully, with a hesitation that seemed to become all-too-familiar, he rested his hand on Rosalie’s belly that was under his blanket. Rosalie hummed in response, but kept her eyes closed still. Roman tried to feel for any movement from the twins, but they didn’t. He tried to think that it was because they were also sleeping. It had nothing to do with the fact that every time he tried to feel for their movement he would get nothing. He ignored the tightness in his throat, he disregarded the burning tears, and prayed to God silently that he would make it through this trying time long enough to at least hold his children once.

The thought was an unwelcome intrusion since that fateful telegram from the Duke’s right hand man two months before. Shoving the bitter memory of that message aside, he got himself ready in the dark with a swiftness, already wanting the day to be done. He couldn’t tell whether his need to stay home was due to his anxieties of being a father, his weariness of having more caseloads of rising crime, or his paranoia about criminal eyes spying on him. He watched his large wife turn about in her sleep as he dressed; she was unable to find a comfortable position. He couldn't blame her. Something he wished he’d have considered before the pregnancy was getting a large family bed so they could share it. Even if she snored like a boozed up bear.

A lock of her thick black hair fell out of it’s wrap and was caught in the light from the hallway behind him. Her lips were pushed out in a half pout, half pucker. The gown she was wearing was a large blue cotton dress with flowing sleeves. Her eyes were closed, not restful, but crinkled under her worried brows. Her face had gotten wider in her pregnancy. Her cheeks were flushed with red with elevated temperature from the warm room. She moved her hand to hold under her head as she laid on her side, facing Roman and the door.

She was beautiful, and Roman took this moment to appreciate her beauty, for he didn't know if this was the last time he would see her. He’d never know from now on.

"I can feel ya starin', darling husband," her teasing tone was muffled by the pillow and her sleepiness. "Get to work so I can sleep."

He quietly leaned over her, just as he always did, and kissed her.

He’d never know that his tired wife had noticed the despair in the extra moments their lips were met.

“Send for someone right away if anything happens, alright dear?” he asked while brushing a stray curl aside.

“Sure thing honey…”

His walk to work was dim in the early morning as the fog was thick as wool. The only light guiding his way was a soft orange desperately clinging to the lampposts. The fog was dense with the promise of the coming autumn season for next month. It wasn’t smart of him to have left so early. There was no one on the street. No vagrants, no Jezebels, and no wayward orphans. Just him, the mist, and the sound of his shoes on moist stones. Still, just because he couldn't see anyone, it didn't mean that he didn't feel like he was being watched with eyes capable of seeing through all sorts of darkness.

It was soon enough in his hurry that he made it to the precinct. He ran his hand through his somewhat damp hair as he took his hat off at the entrance. He was early, earlier than normal, and the shift-changing deputies milling about by the entrance desk stood up straighter when they saw him.

“Hey, Cap’n. How’s the missus? Ready to burst just yet?” the old man at the desk asked. His name was Reggie, and if you called him a secretary you’d get a busted lip. He was the nicest-and oldest- member of the force.

“Oh, she’s fine. Doc says it’s gonna be any day now ‘til they’re here. I think she’s more excited than I am for it to be over. She’s been complaining about her feet being so swollen she can barely stand,” Roman laughed. The use of the word ‘complain’ was only polite. Rosalie’s ‘complaints’ about her pregnancy would make sailors blush.

Reggie guffawed. “Yeah, I remember when Ethel had her first. She was cursing so bad near the end you’d think she was a drunken sailor in a brig!”

“Women have a way with words, don’t they Reg?” Roman commented as he made his way around the desk. He wasn’t really waiting for an answer as he kept walking away.

Reggie must have been in a nice mood, since he didn’t point out the Captain’s distracted behavior as he walked off. Roman appreciated that. He was already in deep enough trouble with his reputation as a younger force captain.

Roman was grateful that he was going to be able to take some leave soon. He didn’t like being away from his pregnant wife all day. Especially now, with everything so changed. He sat down in his rolling chair with the force of a thousand anvils. He opened the folder on his desk, knowing there’d be no change in it since the last time he filled it a month ago with the ‘tip’ Logan and Patton got.

Case Number: 103625 - Open - “The Duke”

He sighed to himself as a heavy headache formed behind his eyes. It was a new day, which meant new trouble, which meant he seriously needed some coffee. He reached for his announcer when-

“Captain, there’s a visitor here for ya.” A fresh faced rookie announced while walking into the office. His voice was a bit too anxious-to-please for the captain’s liking in the morning .

Roman’s voice imitated distant thunder - a warning, a looming threat - “Haven’t you heard of knocking, boy?”

The young man was smart enough to appear embarrassed. “I apologize, sir.” He stood at attention as he had been trained to do. His badge gleamed in the light of the office as his chest puffed out.

Roman felt guilty for snapping at him. He didn’t want to be an angry, bitter leader, like his predecessor. Or like his father had been. Those old men were so hardened by stress that they felt no regard for those beneath them. He refused to be that way, no matter what. So he forced his body to relax as he imagined the darkness in his heart being swept under the new rug of his office.

“I understand. I was a rookie like you once upon a time. What seems to be the trouble?” Roman forced a smile on his face, as though it was drying cement to keep in place.

“You’ve got a guy saying he’s here for a meeting, a...Mr. Doris? Fella has a scar right here on his face." The officer took his finger and motioned on his face as an indicator of his description. Obviously the young man’s mind was wandering to stories about the nastiest criminals known to man.

Roman nodded, cleared his throat, then told him, "Bring him in."

The young officer disappeared, and in one breath the enemy had walked through the office door as if he owned the place. Roman sighed in defeat. It wasn’t ‘as if’ he owned the place, it was that he practically did. Especially now that the detectives weren’t ever going to ‘catch’ the bad guys like they should have ages ago.

“What brings you in so early, Mr. Doris?” Roman asked. He stood up, smoothed down his tie, and held his hand out to shake his visitor’s gloved hand.

The visitor smirked. “I like the new you, Roman. Straight to the punch without any frivolous small talk. Such a change from the last time we had spoken.”

The memory sat between them. A smoked out room, sweaty foreheads, two guns between two young men, a kiss- a stalemate.

Roman gulped down the anxious sensation and forced himself to speak. “Well, I haven’t had any coffee yet, so I’m not feeling patient enough for chit chat.”

Mr. Doris’ laughter sent chills down Roman’s spine. His voice was dry and raspy, like a lizard. “I see. Well, the good news is that your two lead detectives are good at their jobs.” He slammed his fist down onto the desk as his eyes peered into Roman’s. “The bad news is, they’re so good at their job, even you don’t control them anymore.”

“That’s not true!” Roman exploded. The force of his anger pushed him out of his seat so he was practically nose to nose with his guest. “I just suspended Logan Smith for admitting he’s working with one of your men! Detective O’Hearty is too personable to be focused on investigating your precious boss! Hell, he’s probably going to be too busy sidetracked into chasing wild geese from that stunt Logan pulled. And another thing-”

“That’s enough, Roman.” Mr. Doris covered Roman’s mouth with one of his gloved hands. “You’ve told me all I needed to know.”

It’s too easy to play you, dear Roman, Doris thought to himself. I knew something was up with Virgil Vitale. He couldn’t keep the grin off of his face at the thought of finally teaching the little punk a lesson.

Roman shook the hand off of his mouth. His breath was shaky. “What do you mean?”

“Oh, I won’t tell you, dear,” Mr. Doris hummed. He walked to the doorway without any explanation. It was time to take business into his own hands after all. No more time to waste. “I’ve gotta run. Say hi to the missus for me.” He looked over his shoulder to make sure the unspoken threat hit its target.

Roman was left standing in that position. His hands wouldn’t stop shaking. His hair laid out of control around his face, his heart pounding, and the sense of impending doom- as if he just sentenced an innocent man to death.

----------

Alice woke up to the sound of the radio downstairs playing some German concerto. It was a slow morning for once. She hummed to herself, pleased that she was able to wake up slowly to beautiful music as opposed to the sound of harsh knocking at her door. Yet as she turned over in bed her peace was interrupted by the brightness of the sun shining through the window. She groaned at the disruption to her dreamy haze.

Alice hefted herself out of the large bed and made herself to the large vanity-much nicer than the one at her apartment- and started working on her hair. Once she was done making sure she looked presentable she made her way down the grand staircase to meet Logan wherever he was at. Which, knowing how large the house was, meant that it could be a proper while before she would find him.

The smell of sizzled meat wafted through the large hallways. Instead of looking for Logan, she decided to make her way towards the dining room from the night before. It’s rude to check in and hover over a cook’s shoulder, she reckoned. No matter how curious it was to her that Logan didn’t have any help at all.

The moment she sat down she heard the door from the kitchen open. Logan was pushing a dining cart forward on his own. He had a white rag placed over his shoulder and a stained white apron tied around his waist. He was whistling an unfamiliar tune to himself as he set out the platters in front of Alice. She couldn’t help but laugh. She was enjoying this bright version of the detective.

“What’s the occasion, detective?” Alice asked once he sat down with her.

Logan struggled to hide a sheepish grin, “It’s just been a long while since I’ve had any sort of company over. I don’t get to go out much with my line of work.”

“Aw, didn’t wanna bring any wayward souls home for Christmas?” she teased.

Logan rolled his eyes at her. It was good that he was loosening up around her humor. Alice wondered if she could get away with cursing around him yet, but decided not to push her luck, given that they had a long day ahead of them.

“It’s gotta be more than me, come on.” Alice waggled her eyebrows at him. “What’s with the shift in the wind?”

Logan ignored her prompts. Instead, he lowered his head. Alice rushed to set her fork down so she could follow suit.

“Father God, I ask that you bless this food and those who consume it. We thank you for providing for us. We ask for you to sustain our spirits as well as our bodies. I ask that you help us in all of our endeavors today, and I thank you for bringing me someone to share this meal with. Thank you for providing me such youthful company. Amen.”

“Amen.” Alice echoed. She tried to keep her questions to herself. Logan’s prayer wasn’t one she had ever heard before.

Alice lifted the cover to reveal her breakfast. There was sausage, eggs, and toast with powdered sugar. It smelled amazing.

“Thank you, Logan, this looks delicious.” She immediately went for the eggs. It had been so long since she’d had eggs for breakfast. Not since she left her farm home nearly two years ago.

They sat at the table with only the sounds of the radio in the living room occasionally drifting in through the doors. Alice was enjoying her meal so much, she jumped when she heard the fancy telephone in the hallway ringing.

“Excuse me, Alice.” Logan muttered. He wiped his hands on his apron and swiftly walked on his long legs to the hallway.

It was irritating, being called in the morning. Especially when his meal was being interrupted. He lifted the earpiece off of the ringing box and greeted the operator quickly. Who would be calling him now that he’s suspended?

“Logan? Is this Logan Smith?” a partially familiar feminine voice asked over the receiver.

“Yes. Who is this?”

Her words were spoken in rushes with pauses sounding like heavy breathing. “It’s Rosalie...Rosalie de Rossi.-” she took in a deep breath ”-I’m your captain’s wife!” After that she let out a bone-chilling moan.

The captain’s wife? He had only met her once at the Independence Day party at the Captain’s new mansion. Why was she calling someone like him?

The woman on the line hissed. “God fucking dammit! It hurts!”

“What hurts? What’s wrong? Where are you?” Logan threw his questions at her quickly as he reached for his notepad.

“My my,” a slick, whiskey smooth, masculine voice answered. He tutted. “Not very clever, Detective Smith.”

“Where is Mrs. de Rossi?” Logan asked. He felt as if the air around him was heavier. There was a weight settling into his chest. He ignored the familiar sensations and made a note that someone else had taken the line.

“She’s still alive. And she will stay that way, if you do everything I ask.” The man’s words were drawn out. Almost as if he were bored, or stalling.

“What do you want?” Logan hissed. The million questions he had were shoved aside when the man answered.

“I want your lover, Detective. Bring that filthy, grimy, Italian punk to the fisherman’s market in San Francisco after dark. Or I’ll just have to do something to your boss’ beautiful broodmare.” The voice chuckled at his sick comment.

This man was evil. The most evil he'd ever come across. Logan felt like he was going to topple over. “What makes you think I’ll come alone? That I won’t go straight to the captain?”

Laughter as dark as water at midnight bled through the receiver. “Oh Mr. Smith, that’s what I want. Give me a reason to pluck those sweet babies out of his missus.”

Logan heard a scream in the background. A string of curse words that he didn’t doubt were justified.

“Please don’t hurt her. Be reasonable. Why did you call me? I’m on suspension, I don’t have access to the resources-”

“Because your lover's family declared war, my boy!” the man roared. Logan identified his accent-Irish, or Scottish perhaps. “I’m going to get what I need outta him. So lock your brunette bitch away, grab your buddy and your faggot, and get your ass to my docks when the sun sets. Or-” another blood curdling scream from the woman in the background “-the captain’s dear wife and her babies drown.”

Just like that, the phone call ended. Logan didn’t have time to stand in the shock. Instinctive training responses immediately took over his body. He didn’t go back to the dining room and instead ran to get himself dressed. No other thoughts intruded. His head was empty of everything other than the fact that he needed backup.

He needed Patton. He needed to gather his resources. It was still nine in the morning. He had maybe eight hours before it was sunset, then two hours to cross the bay into San Francisco to the fisherman’s market. His mind was fixated on trying to create the quickest itinerary possible and how to notify the captain without the mysterious caller knowing. He seemed to know much more than Logan was comfortable with.

Logan was tying his shoes as he thought. He hadn’t told anyone about the night with Virgil. No one knew. He figured Alice may have suspected, but she hadn’t been able to talk to anyone. Not that she would. She was just a kid. She was just caught up in all of this business out of desperation and survival. Alice was just a pawn in a twisted game. She wasn’t a main player.

Patton was too wrapped up in his obsession with the Duke to even notice. Still, he was very angry towards Logan now that he knew Virgil was involved. Who knows what the captain and Patton talked about after Logan was dismissed. He remembered the knowing look at the Lion’s Den last month. His partner said then that he accepted everybody. Could he have been saying that to blend in?

Then there was the fact that this was the captain’s wife. Why kidnap her to get to Logan? He didn’t know the woman at all, only that the captain loved her very much. She was pregnant when they had met, and from the sound of the call she still was.

“Logan, where are you going?” Alice asked from the doorway of his bedroom.

“There’s an emergency. I need to go.” He pushed himself past her and rushed down the staircase. “Please stay here. Don’t leave.”

“Will Virgil be back to nanny me again?” she asked indignantly.

The question struck him through the heart. He couldn’t leave her unattended. She was defenseless here. The Duke's men could come looking for her. No doubt one of them was behind this in the first place as a way to distract them.

“No. No, I-” he turned to her. “There’s trouble. I need to move you somewhere safer. You can’t be alone.”

Alice’s face seemed to grow ten years older. “I understand. Let’s go.”

They both grabbed their hats from the hook and walked out the door. Logan made his way to his car without another word. Alice felt in her gut that they were running into something more dangerous than she had ever known.

“Where are we going?” Alice asked after climbing into the carriage seat. Logan saw that she had withdrawn into herself. The silly child that he was starting to get introduced to had left her body.

“To Patton’s. I don’t think he’ll have left yet. We need his help.” Logan pulled out onto the street. “I’ll tell you on the way.”

Before the pair had shown up to Patton’s house, he had just drank his coffee. He didn’t need to go into the station today. All of his caseloads were closed except for one. Today was a day of regrouping and hitting the pavement. It was time for some good old fashioned talking to people again. The best way to find someone was to ask their friends or neighbors politely. Give them a smile and such.

He took his time getting ready. Trying to find the man that he used to be before this craziness started. The man who was able to walk down the street with faith in his heart. The detective who could solve everything with the right words someone needed to hear. That man was nowhere to be found as he pulled clothes from his closet.

It was a new day. He knew he would make progress today. No one was going to get the drop on him again.

When he sat down in his armchair his eye was caught on something on the end table. A piece of paper that didn’t seem to be from any of his notepads. It wasn’t there when he had gone to bed the night before.

A familiar delicious thrill rushed through his body. Part of him thought to call on the locksmith soon, though it might not do much good. Carefully, as if the note were an explosive and not a simple message, he lifted the paper.

It was no simple message.

You’re in danger, dear detective. There are worse evils than I. Don’t do what your colleague asks. Come to me at the Lion’s Den instead. -The Duke

Before he had time to react, there was rapid knocking at his door.

A/N:

Hello there! It's been nearly a year. There's a reason for that.

I work very, very hard when it comes to my stories. This one has a very important place in my heart. I had to take a break from it because the last thing I wanted to do was make rush decisions or half-ass everything.

In doing so, it meant that I had to wait until I had the time to give it the attention it deserves. I recently had a lot of my life change this past year, mostly losing loved ones. So this fic didn't get much of it's deserved time at once.

That being said, I swear this has a direction. While a lot of it is up to interpretation, this has a very direct sequence of events. That's why it's important for me to be able to pay extra attention.

That being said, I'm making a new normal. This fic goal is to be updated every 3 months, maybe less. My practice is to edit 3 times at least before I post.

Let me know what you thought of this chapter. Tell me your theories about what will happen next! I love talking about this story with anyone who will listen.

taglist: @deceits-left-glove

let me know if you want to be on the taglist for this or any other ship/story

check my pinned tumblr post for more of my work

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iclaimedtobethebetterbard · 4 years ago

Text

stars in the sk(eyes)

Fandom: Sanders Sides Characters: Logan, Virgil, Roman, Remus, Janus, Patton Rating: Teen & up Relationships: Analogical, background Intrualiceit Warnings: Language, food, like 1 line that’s maybe suggestive but also said half-jokingly Word count: 5592

Read on AO3!

My writing masterpost

Starlight Universe masterpost

analogical week 2021 start - previous - here - next - masterpost

Summary: Logan has always loved stars. Virgil has always loved music. Maybe they can put those together with a little help from some friends.

Notes: Day 2 of Analogical Week 2021! @analogicalweek Takes place in my Starlight Universe, does not need context to read. Patton, Janus, and Remus are all nonbinary folks who use he/they pronouns and masculine terms in this universe (but in the flashback scene, Janus is only using they/them); Roman, Logan, and Virgil are all men who use he/him. (I know absolutely nothing about music or concerts or anything, so please don't roast me too hard for any inaccuracies, lol.)

They were only opening the concert; the real attraction was a band from out of town with a midsize following, making a stop on their tour. Not that Virgil was complaining to have landed this gig. It would be the biggest performance his band—the band he, Janus, and the twins had formed a few years ago—had given, by a lot. And that was exciting. Sure, Virgil had absolutely spent hours stressing over how big it was, but he knew how to manage his anxiety, especially when it came to performances, and the anxiety didn’t stop the excitement.

“You’re going to do wonderfully,” Logan had told him earlier that day as he’d been getting dressed, passing his fingerless leather gloves and then holding his jacket for him to slide into. He’d spoken it with a simple, unassuming confidence, as if it were a given fact. It had been more comforting than Virgil thought Logan knew.

With the memory of his husband’s words carefully nestled against his heart, and the jacket Logan had helped him paint rainbow stripes on sitting on his shoulders, Virgil found it easier to let go of the anxiety. Some lingering tension remained as he paced backstage, running through lyrics in his head and triple checking that everyone knew the schedule, but it wasn’t as bad as usual. Most of it, if he was being honest with himself, wasn’t even about the performance—it was about the surprise the band had put together, the surprise Virgil had had to bite his tongue a couple of times to keep himself from thoughtlessly mentioning it to Logan, even though the surprise had been almost entirely his own idea and the others were just helping. But he’d successfully kept the secret, and now Logan was out in the audience, and Virgil was backstage, and there would be no more chances to spoil it.

But Logan was out in the audience, and Virgil was backstage, and the final round of jitters was setting in. And when Logan wasn’t there, Virgil’s jitters took the form of pestering the hell out of everyone in the room, to make sure everything was perfect.

He checked all the instruments, giving Janus’s keyboard a once-over without touching because he knew better by this point. Remus’s drumset was already on the stage—he was drumming with his fingers on the end of the fallout table in the corner—so there was nothing to do about that. Roman was actively tuning his guitar, so Virgil left that alone too and instead checked his bass, just in case it had gotten out of tune in the last thirty seconds.

All of the instruments were fine, great, even, and Remus and Roman were undeniably being productive; Janus, who’d been on their phone in the corner, had stepped out for just a moment, probably to get a drink of water or something.

Things were in order. Which was good. Great, even. But it gave Virgil nothing to do with his restless energy.

“Are we ready?” he asked, jiggling his leg and tracing the pattern of his fishnet tights through one of the large rips in his jeans.

Roman looked up. “Yes,” he said shortly. Roman’s nerves tended to take the form of a very short temper, which didn’t mix well with Virgil’s perfectionism.

“Yeah,” Remus agreed, running a hand through his dark green curls and straightening his denim jacket.

“We all know the order things go in?” Virgil followed up after a minute of tense silence.

“Mmhm,” Remus said easily. Remus, and Remus alone, somehow always managed to remain at ease and unbothered no matter what. Virgil didn’t know how they did it.

Virgil took stock of everyone’s outfits. He himself was wearing fishnet leggings that went all the way up past his waist. Over them he had ripped black skinny jean, and a black crop top splattered with white paint. On top of that, he wore his black denim jacket, which matched the ones the other three were wearing. Virgil’s had the rainbow pride flag painted on the front, all down the lapel area; the rest of the jacket was covered in patches. He checked his makeup, examining the black eyeshadow and lipstick in his phone’s camera; it looked fine. Perfect, even.

Roman was the neatest of the group, made to stand out as the lead singer. He wore the same high-heeled doc martens as the other three, but in white where theirs were all black. He had a tight white longsleeve shirt made of a shimmery material and a matching pair of white pants, and the black jacket contrasting nicely against it all. Roman’s jacket had the aromantic pride flag where Virgil had the rainbow, and the rest of his jacket was painted with red roses all at the ends of long, intricate, thorny stems. His eyeliner was sharp enough to cut, and his curly hair was piled up atop a black headband wrapped around his forehead like a crown.

Janus still wasn’t back, but he’d been on the neater end too, to counter Virgil and especially Remus’s scruffiness. Their outfit was sleek and all black save for a thin white belt around their waist. A black hat with a broad round brim framed their face like a dark halo. His jacket had nonbinary and pan stripes on the front, and thin white squiggly lines running up and down like warped pinstripes everywhere else. (Virgil knew where on the jacket one line ended in a tiny snake head, and where one trailed off into a tail, but you wouldn’t notice unless you knew to look.) They were wearing black lipstick to match Virgil, and winged eyeliner to match Roman, and contour that emphasized the sharpness of his cheekbones; definitely the heaviest makeup of the group.

Remus, sitting in the corner and making noises to themself, was a sharp contrast to his boyfriend Janus’s sleek elegance. His black jeans, splattered with white paint to match Virgil’s crop top, were ripped almost to shreds, open nearly entirely from mid-thigh down to his ankles, with only a few clinging strands of fabric keeping them anywhere in the realm of being pants. The tee they wore—black again, with his own name painted on it in large white letters—was also ripped full of holes, these ones much more deliberate; he’d slashed it carefully with an exacto knife, kneeling on the ground and focusing with their tongue stuck out slightly, until it was exactly how he wanted it and you could catch glimpses of their top surgery scars when they moved. His makeup consisted of dramatic green and black eyeshadow, and his jacket had the trans and polyamorous flags on it—he and Janus, who had nearly identical collections of pride flags between them, had split two and two which color schemes they wanted to use. The rest of Remus’s jacket consisted of a few jagged holes and some incredibly detailed paintings of green tentacles.

The instruments were fine. The costumes were fine. The makeup was fine. What else did that leave for Virgil to fret over as the final minutes ticked away?

“How about the blocking?” Virgil said. “We can go over it again if anyone—”

“I promise we know, Virge,” Roman snapped.

“Come on, kiddo, you know he’s just trying to help!” piped up Patton, Janus and Remus’s other boyfriend, who was suddenly somehow present and sitting in Janus’s lap, his pastel outfit completely out of place amidst the varying edgy styles everyone else in the room was sporting.

“How did you get back here?” Roman and Virgil demanded in unison. Virgil hadn’t even noticed Janus was back, let alone that he’d brought Patton, who was supposed to be in the audience with Logan until the performance was over.

“Oops,” Janus said, not sounding even a tiny bit remorseful as they played with Patton’s dark curls.

“Did you leave Logan alone?” Virgil demanded of Patton, hands on his hips.

“Only for a minute! He’s getting snacks, anyway,” Patton said, wrapping his arms around Janus’s neck. “We both know where our seats are, he’ll be fine.”

“You already have a partner backstage, stop being greedy,” Roman scolded Janus. “Patton, you know we need to focus right now, can you please not distract my horny bandmates until after the show?”

“You sound like Virgil, with all that worrywarting,” Remus commented, snickering.

“Take that back this instant!” Roman demanded as Virgil gave Remus double birds.

Remus only guffawed, looking incredibly amused.

“Seriously, though, uh, Patton, with all the love in my heart: get out,” Virgil said.

Patton wrinkled his nose, but pressed a warm smack of a kiss to Janus’s cheek and hopped to his feet.

“Do I get a kiss?” Remus asked, reaching his arms out hopefully.

“Makeup—” Roman began warningly.

“I haven’t got any on my mouth!” Remus said triumphantly. “Suck it, Jan.”

Janus smiled wryly, fingers rising to but not quite touching their black lipstick that Patton had avoided so carefully. “The prices I pay for beauty.”

Patton giggled, crossing to Remus, clasping both his hands, and leaning down to kiss him sweetly.

“Great, you’re very very cute together but now is not the time, Patton get out and stop distracting your boyfriends,” Roman said, shooing Patton towards the door.

Remus raised an eyebrow. “High strung much?”

“Not all of us possess your—your stupid coolheadedness powers, Remus!” Roman snapped.

Patton paused in the doorway and pointed at Roman, getting out his dad voice. “Hey. Be nice.” The finger moved to Virgil. “Be nice.” His eyes flicked to Remus, then Janus, and his voice shifted to a different tone, half flirty and half joking. “You two be good boys.”

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god, I said to stop being horny!” Roman shrieked, chasing a giggling Patton out of the room and down the hall. He returned moments later, Patton-less and fixing at his hair to make sure it wasn’t too messy. “We had better not have any more alloromantic bullshit from any of you until after the show is over!” he announced. “Okay?” He didn’t sound quite as annoyed as before.

“Homophobia,” Remus accused teasingly.

But instead of snapping back, Roman giggled. “Oh, shut up.”

The twins began joking back and forth, Janus making the occasional amused interjection. Evidently Patton’s intrusion into the room, although technically unhelpful, had done wonders to break the tension, and Virgil reminded himself to thank Patton later.

Virgil’s phone buzzed with a text from Logan.

Logan: Patton found me, don’t worry. Logan: How are you doing?

Virgil: hahahahahaaaa i don’t wanna think abt it

Logan began typing, then the little bubble went away; a second later, the phone began to ring, Logan’s caller ID plain to see.

“Hi, babe,” Virgil greeted.

“Hello, dear. Would you like to walk me through your plan for the performance, to reassure yourself?”

Virgil let out a small sigh of relief. “Yes, please.”

“I am listening,” Logan assured him.

Virgil took a deep breath and launched into a detailed itinerary, knowing that Logan didn’t mind if he got a little too technical in his terminology because Logan was listening for Virgil’s sake.

“And then that’s about it,” Virgil wound down, carefully leaving off the final item from his explanation. It wouldn’t do to spoil the surprise now. “Oh, looks like we’re getting ready now, gotta go.”

“I love you,” Logan said quickly. “You’re going to do a wonderful job.”

Virgil let out a short laugh. “Thanks, L. Love you too.” He hung up, set his phone down on the table, and picked up his bass.

“You ready?” Roman asked, nudging Virgil with his elbow, as the group finally headed towards the stage.

Virgil sucked in a long breath. “Yeah. I think so. Are you?”

“Oh, you know it!” Roman grinned, a spring in his step. He paused after a second and glanced back to Virgil. “Sorry for being so wound up earlier.”

“It happens.” Virgil shrugged. “Right back at you.”

Roman nodded and put a hand on Virgil’s shoulder. “Hey. He’s going to love it. Just wait and see.”

Virgil looked away, half smiling. “I sure hope so.”

“He will, I know it!” Roman insisted as they climbed the steps onto the stage and emerged into what could practically have been the eye of a hurricane, for all the noise and light that surrounded the stage.

The sky above was fully dark; bright lights everywhere in the area contrasted against it. There was a decent crowd. The venue seemed almost full, as a matter of fact. The observation added a thrill of adrenaline to compliment the goosebumps from the chilly breeze across Virgil’s bare midriff.

Roman stepped forward and spread his arms wide right as the spotlights came up. “Hey, folks, thank you for being with us here tonight!” he said, his smile gleaming in the bright lights and his voice booming in the speakers. “We have some great hits lined up for you tonight! Let’s get it started, huh?”

Virgil waited a few seconds for the cheer of the crowd to peak. Janus began the melody on the keyboard; Virgil came in with his bass at exactly the same second Roman began to sing, and Remus picked up the beat on the drums on cue.

Virgil was quickly able to get lost in the music, all his focus on playing and providing backup vocals, leaving him with no more brain space for his anxiety. This was his favorite thing about music: its ability to keep him in the moment.

They played three songs. Two covers that always went over really well, and one song that the twins had written together about family that always left Roman just a little teary. Normally that would be their closing song.

But tonight was a little bit different.

Roman took a step back, nodding at Virgil; the pair of them traded places onstage, putting Virgil front and center.

“So,” Virgil said, the mic on his cheek picking up his words, “we were thinking we’d let you all be the first to hear our new song. Uh, I wrote this one. And normally Roman does our singing, because—well, you’ve heard his voice. But this song is kind of special. I wrote it for my husband. So. We thought I’d perform it tonight.”

As Janus began playing the melody, Virgil searched the front row of the crowd, squinting against the lights, until he found Logan, sitting next to Patton and gazing up at Virgil with shining eyes. “Lo, I love you so much, babe. More than every star you’ve ever shown me.” He took a deep breath and began to sing.

***

10 years earlier

Unknown Number: Hello. This is Janus. Logan’s roommate

Virgil: how’d u get this number?

Janus: I broke into Logan’s phone after you started dating and saved you to my contacts just in case

[read 3:43pm}

[3:46pm]

Virgil: i Virgil: wtf dude

Janus: Your boyfriend has been moping in his room all day, can you please come fix it? Janus: Roman is starting to mope too for no good reason, but he’s doing it in the living room and at this point it is starting to affect my quality of life

Virgil: yk i literally could not care less abt that part u asshole <3 Virgil: i’ll be over in 15 Virgil: is he ok?

Janus: He won’t talk to me, I don’t know what happened

Virgil: i’ll be over in 10

It was normally a 12-minute walk from the dorm Virgil was an RA in to Logan’s apartment just off campus, but Virgil could walk fast when he was anxious or alone, and in this case he was both. Even taking the time to grab a jacket, he still made it to the building in nine minutes flat.

Janus let Virgil into the apartment almost the second he knocked, relief plain to see on their face.

“You see?” Janus said over their shoulder in a scolding tone. “I had to resort to outside measures to deal with your bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit,” Roman whined from where he was slumped on the couch, scrolling aimlessly through Netflix on the TV.

“Oh? And what’s this?” Janus demanded, hands on their hips. They dramatically pushed the button to open the microwave door, revealing a limp burrito wrapped in a damp paper towel.

“Lunch,” Roman mumbled defensively.

“You hate microwave food, and it’s four in the afternoon!” Janus snapped.

“I am in a creative slump, Jan! Have some sympathy!”

“No! Get your whiny ass off the couch and stop ruining my afternoon!”

Virgil took a deep breath and pointedly walked in between the pair of them down the hall towards Logan’s room. Roman and Janus’s still-bickering voices faded into the background.

“Hey.” Virgil knocked on the door, which had a piece of printer paper taped to it with Logan’s name written on it in blue sharpie and a couple of stars, both scribbles and stickers, scattered around it. He waited, and when there was no reply, he added, “Are you okay, Lo?”

“I’m fine,” Logan said, in a voice that had obviously been crying.

“Can I come in?” Virgil asked.

“Okay.”

Virgil pushed open the door and stepped into the dim room, closing it behind him. The blinds were closed, and Logan was curled up under a mound of blankets.

“Hey, baby,” Virgil murmured, kicking off his shoes and climbing to sit on the bed beside Logan and stroke his hair. “What’s wrong?”

Logan made a muffled noise of misery into the mattress.

“What?” Virgil said after a moment.

Logan rolled over. “Teacher didn’t like my essay.”

Virgil chewed on the inside of his lip for a moment. “Okay, I promise I’m not making fun of you, but you do know that that is possibly the most stereotypically you thing you have ever said to me, right?”

Logan let out a little huff that was not quite a laugh. “I guess.” He was silent for a moment as Virgil continued to stroke his hair. “And I know it’s stupid. I still got a B+ and my overall grade in the class is fine and I know I’m a good writer and everything. But it sucks. I was really proud of it.”

“I’m sorry about that,” Virgil said, choosing to ignore the squirm in his gut that always happened when grades came up. It was so easy to compare or to worry about others comparing and then to worry about others getting upset over comparisons and—he dragged himself back to the present, forcibly setting the issue aside. “You’re allowed to feel upset,” he told Logan. “About anything that upsets you. Even if you wouldn’t choose it.”

Logan didn’t respond, but after a minute his hand snaked out from under the covers and grasped Virgil’s.

“Do you want to go for a walk?” Virgil asked, struck with the idea.

“Huh?”

“A walk. Get out of your head for a little bit and hang out. We can talk if you want, or just be together.”

Roman’s voice grew particularly loud outside, and Virgil picked out a teary, petulant, “I hate you!”

“Plus it’ll get you away from that energy,” he added wryly.

Logan drew in a breath and sat up. “Alright. Let’s do it.” He pulled out a denim jacket while Virgil put his shoes back on and retied the laces. They made their way out of the apartment, hand in hand.

Roman was on his feet now, releasing an angry tirade at Janus, hands clenched into fists and sounding on the verge of crying, the TV remote cast on the floor beside him. Janus was sitting on the kitchen counter with arms crossed and an intimidating glare on their face.

“Hey!” Virgil snapped, and Roman cut off abruptly. “Eat some food,” Virgil told him on a hunch. Sure, Roman could be a little immature at times, but this was on a whole different level, and a lack of food seemed like the simplest culprit.

Virgil looked over at Janus, to make it clear that they weren’t off the hook either. “We’re going out. You two better make up before we get back. Clear?”

“You can’t tell us what to do—” Roman began stubbornly.

“Janus literally called me in to fix all your problems, so yeah. I can. Also open your windows, it’s gloomy as fuck in here.” Virgil opened the door and held it for Logan, tossing one last glare over his shoulder at Roman, who looked dumbstruck, and Janus, who avoided eye contact.

Logan was quiet as the two of them walked down the stairs and exited the apartment building, hands in his pockets (one still clasping Virgil’s) and eyes on the toes of his slip-on shoes.

“Wanna talk?” Virgil asked.

Logan tilted his head to the side for a moment, his thinking face slipping over his features, and then shook his head.

Virgil nodded. “Okay.” He fished in his pocket for his earbuds and plugged them in. “Let me know if that changes, okay?” He received a small nod and turned on his go-to playlist—a 12-and-a-half-hour-long composition of all his favorite emo songs that he could loop without having to put any thought in.

The two of them wandered through the streets, hand in hand, music blaring in Virgil’s ears and Logan’s fingers soft and warm against his. They made their way towards downtown; their university was in a small city, and it was pretty walkable.

As they walked, weaving around and across different blocks, occasionally stopping to peek into particularly interesting shop windows, the tension in Logan’s shoulders slowly began to relax and his gaze migrated from the toes of his shoes upwards to take in the surrounding scenery. Virgil felt himself relaxing in turn. The subdued, almost sullen look on Logan’s face was beginning to shift back to his typical bright-eyed curiosity, which meant that while maybe not all was right with the world, a whole lot was right with the world.

As the sky began to darken, Logan’s pace quickened with sudden purpose—but he didn’t lead Virgil in the direction of the apartment. Instead, he headed in almost the exact opposite direction. Virgil was lost for a moment as to where they were going, until the park in the center of downtown came into view. Ah. That explained it. He was kind of glad; he didn’t feel ready for the quiet time they were spending together to be over.

A scent caught his attention as they entered the park, and he tugged gently at Logan’s arm, nodding towards the mediterranean food truck. A small smile answered him, and a nod, and the pair of them made their way over. They both ordered gyros—Virgil chicken, and Logan, who was trying out vegetarian food, falafel.

Fifteen minutes later, seated side by side on a park bench and finishing the last of their sandwiches, Logan cleared his throat. “Thank you.”

Virgil bumped his shoulder against his boyfriend’s. “Of course, babe.”

“I am feeling… better,” Logan said cautiously, as if he were testing out the words in his mouth to see if they felt true.

Virgil nodded. “Better is good.”

Logan nodded, eyes moving to the sky, which was now almost fully dark except for a streak of orange sunset leftover on the horizon. The stars were out, at least the brightest ones that could be seen even past the floodlights placed every so often across the park.

“You like space, and shit, right?” Virgil said, scooting closer to Logan and dragging his arm to wrap around Virgil as he rested his head on Logan’s shoulder. It was a bit of a rhetorical question, since he knew Logan had an astronomy minor and was the vice president of the astronomy club and had gone on no less than three eager rambles about space in the last month alone, but one could always do with a conversation opener.

Logan blinked and looked down at him. “I do.” You know this, his tone said, a little puzzled at the question.

“What star is that?” Virgil pointed at a particularly bright one, although he wasn’t paying nearly as much attention to the star as he was to Logan’s face.

Sure enough, Logan brightened, his eyes more interesting than any star. “Oh! That’s not a star at all—it’s actually Mercury!”

“Really?” Virgil asked, grinning and scooting closer.

Logan wrapped his arm a little more tightly around Virgil’s shoulders with an answering smile. “Yes, and it’s actually very fascinating…” And just like that, he was off, words spilling out of his mouth at a breakneck pace, gesturing eagerly with his free hand to emphasize his points.

Virgil listened, doing his best to follow along and asking a few questions whenever Logan started to wind down, but mostly just happy to watch his boyfriend’s lips as he excitedly infodumped, and his eyes, too, alight with delight, the frustration of the disappointing grade all but forgotten as he held Virgil and told him stories about the night sky.

It was nearly ten at night by the time they made their way back to Logan’s apartment, chatting back and forth in quiet voices and giggling. Logan broke off as he opened the door and got a look inside; he glanced over his shoulder at Virgil and put a finger to his lips.

Virgil hushed and followed him in, then saw what the need for quiet was: Janus and Roman were asleep on the sofa, Roman sprawled on his stomach on top of Janus with his limbs everywhere and his face buried in Janus’s chest, Janus with their arms wrapped around him and a throw pillow propping their head up and a worn copy of Crime and Punishment flopped over from where it had clearly been propped up on Roman’s back.

“Precious,” Virgil commented softly as Logan picked up the book, tucked a bookmark off the coffee table into it, and set it down with the tender care he seemed to reserve exclusively for books and Virgil.

Logan smiled. “They are, rather.” He looked down at his roommates. “Sometimes I wonder why I picked the two most dramatic people I know to live with.”

“Sometimes like this afternoon?” Virgil said with a chuckle.

Logan snorted. “Maybe. But then they do things like this, and I remember why I like them.”

Virgil noticed something on the tiny kitchen table. “Or this?” He pointed.

Logan came over to examine what Virgil had found. “Oh,” he breathed, a smile spreading across his face.

A plate of cookies sat on the table, together with a hastily handmade card.

“Sorry :( ❤️” it read in large, expressive cursive, and beneath it in smaller, neater handwriting, “I actually didn’t do anything wrong, but these are for you and I did the dishes, also you’re welcome for the date night.”

Logan laughed quietly, taking a cookie and offering the plate to Virgil, who accepted one cookie—they looked to be snickerdoodles. “Yes. Things exactly like this,” he said. He took a bite of the cookie and raised his eyebrows. “Not bad.”

Virgil grinned and leaned over to kiss him. “Not bad at all,” he agreed, pulling away.

“I literally gave you your own cookie,” Logan whispered, clearly trying not to laugh.

“Yeah, but it tastes better this way.” Virgil winked, mainly for Logan’s reaction—he pressed a hand to his mouth, stifling an amused smile that was still visible in his eyes. “I should go,” Virgil added, glancing at the time. It was Sunday tomorrow, so he didn’t need to worry about how late he was up, but he disliked walking home at night.

Logan nodded, taking another cookie and pressing it into his hand. “Text me when you get home?”

“I always do,” Virgil said, accepting the cookie and a goodnight kiss that still tasted just faintly of cinnamon and sugar.

And he did just that; he always felt a little awkward simply texting “I made it home,” or the like, so he usually tried to come up with interesting questions to send to Logan instead. Tonight, it was:

Virgil: hey Virgil: if u could pick one Thing u always wanted to do Virgil: and get a guarantee that u’d get a chance to do that thing no matter what Virgil: what would u pick?

Logan: Fascinating question! I would like the opportunity to name a star. Logan: I don’t imagine it will ever happen in real life, but I’ve always thought it would be… cool, for lack of a better word.

Virgil: ghfdkjghksdhj i will never be over ur love for space Virgil: u have a Brand and u stick to it

Logan: Well, a brand is important in life. :-) Logan: What about you? What would you pick?

Virgil: i think it’d be neat to be in a band Virgil: idk Virgil: like i don’t wanna be super famous or anything but like Virgil: being in a band would be neat Virgil: yk?

***

Ten years later, Virgil sang the last lines of his song looking right at his husband. “And I don’t even need to look to the skies/Because all of the stars are in your eyes.”

The noise around him didn’t fade away like in the movies; to the contrary, the cheering was so loud it was almost hard to focus. But Logan’s face was absolutely alight—Virgil couldn’t be sure at this distance, but he thought Logan might even be tearing up—and he was looking at Virgil like he was his whole world. Even with the bright lights and overwhelming sounds all around, it was easy to focus on Logan in the midst of it all, Logan pressing a hand to his mouth but smiling too wide for anything to hide it, Logan leaning into the side-hug that Patton—oh, and there was Patton, right beside him—was offering, but never taking his eyes off Virgil. Logan looked so happy, even though Virgil knew concerts weren’t really his favorite type of event, and Virgil was hit right in the chest with a renewed realization that Logan was Virgil’s whole world and damn, Virgil wanted to make sure everyone knew it.

But their time onstage was up, and the next few minutes were a bustle of packing equipment away and cleaning up the space they’d been allotted backstage, and it all went by in a bit of a blur, helped along by the remnants of Virgil’s performance mindset and slight overstimulation—though that was getting better now that he was offstage.

Virgil took a quick break, when the bulk of the urgent work was done, to just stand in the empty restroom and breathe for a moment, the noise of the other band who were now onstage thudding in the background so quietly he could hardly hear it. When he’d fully composed himself, feeling much calmer, he took a deep breath and headed back out.

On his way out, he ran into Roman, pushing a dolly with a box on it. “Oh, good, there you are,” he greeted Virgil. “Can you—oh, for crying out loud,” he broke off, looking ahead.

Following his gaze, Virgil snickered as he saw Remus, leaning against the wall with their hands clasped behind his head, grinning down at Patton, who was leaned forward, bracketing Remus with his arms, looking up at him and speaking, although Virgil couldn’t hear him from here.

“We still have work to do,” Roman said under his breath, but the exasperated gaze he leveled at the pair was altogether far too fond to have much real bite.

Virgil’s mind was on other matters; if Patton was here, that meant—

“Lolo!” Patton’s voice called brightly; he’d seen Roman and Virgil and stepped back from Remus, waving happily at the pair of them. “Virgil’s here!”

At the sound of Patton’s voice, Janus emerged from the room, a little further down the hall, that had served as the headquarters for the band. He bent to give the tiny man a kiss, then turned to Remus for another kiss.

Logan popped his head out just a moment behind Janus. “Virgil?” He brightened when he saw Virgil’s face, and stepped fully out into the hall. He hadn’t changed from his work outfit, still wearing a button down with the sleeves rolled up, a tie, and a pair of jeans, and a smile that he looked like he couldn’t wipe off his face.

He was still the handsomest man Virgil had ever seen.

Virgil looked to Roman. “Permission to get back on my alloromantic bullshit, captain?” he asked teasingly.

Roman rolled his eyes and swatted Virgil’s shoulder. “Go be cute,” he said benignly.

Virgil took off down the hallway to Logan, not quite running; Logan took a few steps to meet him, and Virgil caught him in a hug so eager he actually lifted the taller man off his feet for just a second.

Logan, half-laughing with surprise, grasped Virgil’s shoulders for balance as he regained his feet. “You wrote me a song?”

“Did you like it?” Virgil asked, holding him tightly.

“Virgil, I—” Logan seized Virgil’s face in his hands and kissed him.

Virgil wrapped his arms more firmly around his husband, kissing him back exuberantly and swaying slightly back and forth.

“It’s perfect,” Logan told him, breaking away only just far enough to speak. “You’re perfect.”

Virgil grinned, reaching up to run his fingers through Logan’s neat hair. “Careful, you’ll spoil me.”

“I don’t think I could ever do that,” Logan told him seriously. “It’s not spoiling if you deserve it.”

And really, what was Virgil supposed to do about that except kiss his husband again?

56 notes · View notes

marsupials-of-mars · 4 years ago

Photo

Janus shedding hcs! my favorite thing is giving Janus more snakey features, (largely because of my obsession with Snake Discovery on youtube…)

-Janus in blue! “In blue” means a snake is just about to shed, named after the milky blue color that their eyes turn. They’re also blind during that time which ties into the blind Janus hc that went around.

-Janus sheds ALL his skin, not just the snake half, however only that eye goes blind and really turns blue. this is based off the fact that scaleless snakes exist! look them up! They still shed their skin but the shed is thinner and kinda looks like when you let school glue dry on yourself and peel it off

-Another prior hc i love playing with is that Janus’s shed is like a period. He gets irritable and snappy and really uncomfy, so the others have to be really nice and they kinda do his bidding cause he’s scary when he’s pissed. also just cause they feel bad for him…

-Janus wears clothing what isn’t restrictive and has less contact with his skin. this is another reason he tends to hide away before he sheds: he doesn’t like dressing unprofessionally in front of the others.

-Janus rubs on things to help him shed. it does help that he has hands unlike a real snake so it’s a little easier but that also just creates a new problem, that being he is not tube shaped so getting a clean easy shed is super tough and takes a long time.

-Fresh shed Janus is also very uncomfy! His new skin is very sensitive so nobody gets to touch him, he has to ointment it up like a full body sunburn and usually ends up with a tub of ice cream sitting in the middle of his room floor trying to reduce contact with any surface. That lasts about a day.

-Remus steals the shed skin. Janus doesn’t want it so it doesn’t bother him, however he does wonder what he does with it. Does he wear it? Eat it? Just kinda hoard it to have around and admire? Only Remus knows. It’s stolen and never seen again.

-Janus has a post-shed meal. He doesn’t eat while he prepares to shed and shedding takes a lot of energy out of him, so he needs to refuel. I hc that Janus has a split lower jaw and a wide throat so he only eats occasionally (once or twice weekly a meal about the width of his waist) like a snake. This is why when Patton makes him come have family dinner with the others he just ends up sitting there awkwardly. I have a fanfic about Remus being oddly into how Janus eats and he often provides meals so he can watch, usually by slaughtering something. tbh, Remus “Monsterfucker” Sanders is really into most of Janus’s snakey features.

(bonus old Janus shed drawing under the cut! I drew him shedding more like a lizard back then)

#janus sanders #sanders sides #thomas sanders #remus sanders

751 notes · View notes

delimeful · 5 years ago

Text

not always what they seem

finished g/t space au commission for @legendsgates ! it was super fun to work on, i hope everyone enjoys!

warnings: dehumanization, treating people like animals, abduction, miscommunication, remus being remus, deceit, misguided but good intentioned light sides

“Hey, kid, wake up.”

Virgil groaned, shifting to his side. It was still dark, why was someone bothering him?

“There you go. It’s a great day outside, open your eyes already.”

Wait. He lived alone. Who was talking to him?

Visions of chatty burglars or insane door to door salesmen breaking and entering flashed before his eyes, and he jerked upright with a gasp, eyes flying open.

Darkness. He couldn’t see a thing. “What?”

Virgil nearly poked himself in the eye in his haste to check his face for a blindfold. He should be able to see plenty; there was an annoying streetlamp just under his apartment window. Had he spontaneously gone blind? Had he been kidnapped? Was he in a trunk, slowly suffocating to death?

“Hey, calm down. Everything’s going to be fine, don’t pass out on us now.”

A burst of unhinged, echoing laughter nearly cut off the end of the sentence, and chills ran down Virgil’s spine. “Oh god. Look, I take terrible care of my body, you don’t want my organs, I promise.”

There was an aggrieved sigh nearby. Virgil hesitantly reached his hands out to feel the space around him. It didn’t feel like a car trunk. He was sitting up just fine.

“I don’t think we’re being trafficked, but if we were, you’d be pleading your case to the wrong guy. I’m in the same situation as you.” A dull knocking accompanied the words. “Unfortunately.”

Virgil carefully turned his body to face the direction of the voice, squinting in case he could make out any sign of an attack. “...Right, sure. Care to fill me in on what-- what exactly that situation is?”

The stranger only seemed sardonically amused at the bite in his voice. “We’re trapped in a room. There’s glass walls dividing the room into sections. There’s a little bit of light coming in through the roof, your eyes will adjust soon. That’s all I’ve got. Remember anything from before you woke up?”

Virgil shoved down the rising panic, rising to a tentative crouch with his arms outstretched for balance. He’d been… What had he been doing? “I… I don’t know.”

Another sigh. “Yes, I assumed so.” The outline of a silhouette seemed to be coming into focus. Unless Virgil was just imagining things. “Thank you so much for being helpful.”

He bristled at the tone, but before he could respond, another giggling laugh reverberated around them.

“Don’t fret so much, figments,” a new, somewhat nasally voice said cheerily. “I’m sure your terrible and inevitably gory deaths will only hurt for as long as the dream lasts.”

Virgil took a long, shaky inhale. “What the fuck.”

“‘The fuck’ is Remus, the third occupant in our room. As far as I can tell, he believes this is all a hallucination brought on by sleep paralysis. Best to just ignore him,” the first stranger advised dryly.

“I’m still ignoring you back,” ‘Remus’ returned in a singsong. Virgil almost couldn’t blame him. He’d really rather wake up and realize this was all a dream, too.

He wasn’t going to bet on it, though. He stumbled forwards, feeling the walls for a door, a switch, anything.

“Do you think I’m an idiot?” the unnamed stranger scorned. “I’ve already checked everything that could be checked. Nothing’s going to happen--”

His voice was cut off by three quick, consecutive beeps from somewhere above their heads. Virgil turned his head this way and that, searching for an intercom or mechanical device nearby. “What’s that?”

Neither stranger answered, and Virgil realized that this was something new just as one side of the room began to slide upwards like a garage door. He raised a hand as bright light poured into the room, backing up as far as he could. In the corner of his vision, another person was doing much the same.

Something large moved outside the room, its shadow falling on them and making it a little less difficult to see.

Unfortunately, what he was seeing was impossibly horrifying enough to be real.

A huge figure, like a giant from a children’s fairytale, was visible from the torso up. It was wearing something close to a full body hazmat suit, its inhuman face visible behind a pane of red-tinted glass. Piercing red eyes were placed just slightly too far apart, and a shiny black shell covered the bottom of its face like a curved medical mask.

It leaned closer, and Virgil recoiled harshly enough to slam his back into the corner of the room. The eyes settled on him for a moment, before flicking over to the other occupants. Adrenaline surged through him, but there was nowhere to channel it. He couldn’t flee, and there was no way he could fight. He was helpless.

In the section next to Virgil, a short man dressed in formal wear stood carefully still. He was meeting eyes with the monster, his expression neutral and still. Where Virgil had felt like a deer in the headlights, this man acted more like a snake assessing prey. The only sign that he was unsettled was the white knuckled fists at his sides.

The monster made an unsettling sound, like a hum interspersed with clicks, and then turned its attention to the only human still laying on the ground, presumably Remus. A few rigid plates along its forehead twitched downward, and it chittered at Remus.

Virgil caught what looked like mandibles protruding from under its face plate, and felt lightheaded.

“Remus, I suggest you look alive,” the snakelike man muttered, attention still locked on the huge creature. Remus didn’t respond, though whether it was because of the monster or because he was still ignoring them was anyone’s guess.

A moment later, the monster reached up with a limb, the suit glove doing nothing to conceal the creature’s spindly, clawed fingers, arranged like an osprey’s talons. It tapped the glass between them, and Virgil was abruptly reminded of a child at an aquarium. The ‘room’ they were captive in was a mere box to this being. An enclosure.

Remus finally sat up, stretching lanky arms as though it was a normal morning. He cocked his head at the monster, squinting. “What are you looking at, you big bitch?”

Virgil inhaled sharply through his teeth, but the monster didn’t react beyond its forehead plates shifting back up, and before long, it was looking down at a strange grey cube, flicking talons along its surface like it was a touchscreen.

In his section, Remus had unfolded to his ridiculous full height, and was ambling up to the wall separating them. He smiled, something about it vaguely unhinged. “Hmm, hallucinations aren’t supposed to be this expansive! It’s almost like we’re actually here, captured by giant monsters that are probably going to stick us in a blender for a morning smoothie!”

The snakelike man rubbed his temples, still holding onto his composure. He didn’t dignify the gory statement with a response, but Virgil was more than happy to.

“Hey, it was Remus, right?” Virgil asked, and he saw the man nodding enthusiastically in the corner of his vision. “Please shut the hell up.”

“Never been very good at that!”

—-

Roman glanced up from the data sheet, watching as the new specimens wandered about and made little noises at each other. He couldn’t help but hum a bit at the sight; the little animals were so charming.

“Roman!” a familiar voice trilled, and he turned to the lab’s entrance, clicking in greeting at the sight of his partners. Though he’d been uncertain about working with beings from other quadrants at first, they’d managed to overcome most of their original hurdles and now worked smoothly together. There was nobody he’d rather have as his research team, even with the disapproving twitch in Logan’s ears.

“Dear friends,” he returned, gesturing widely and making all the specimens freeze up again. “I swear I haven’t opened a single sect, only gazed upon our newest finds. You’re going to love them Patton, they have the strangest little noises.”

The Nilh wasted no time in scampering forwards, just barely prevented from bumping the enclosure by Logan’s tail tugging him back slightly. “Oh, they’ve already started communicating with each other? What about body language, did you have the vidfeed on?”

“Yes, and of course,” Roman gestured with a pointed flourish, “I have also followed procedures and had the cam on since I entered the lab, treasured nerds.”

Logan’s hand flicked in an exasperated gesture, but his ears were no longer angled down, so Roman counted it as a win. Patton tugged the Glanrim closer by the tail, using his multitude of hands to push him into his spot. “Look, Lo! I think this one is threat displaying at me! They’re all acting so differently, it’s going to be so exciting to figure out what sort of sounds they use!”

Despite his professional demeanor, Logan’s eyes all widened with excitement as he bent slightly to inspect their samples. “There’s quite a variety in patterns and sizes as well,” he observed, voice low and resonant. The little creatures all seemed to stiffen at it. “I would almost believe them different species entirely if not for the similar body structure.”

“They’ve even got little primitive outfits, see?” Roman pointed towards the calm one in the middle, eyeing the seams. “There must be a bonding purpose for it, like how some mammalian animals will use pigment-dyes for enhancing appearance to attract mates. The real question is, how did they all end up looking so different? Which one is closest to the traits that make one desirable?”

“I don’t see any reason we can’t find out!” Patton responded brightly. “We’ve got three samples, one for each of us, so what say we each get started on recording all the information we can!”

“We only have three specimens, so it’s important that we don’t push too far with any of them. This is only preliminary work,” Logan cautioned. “That said, I agree. The sooner we begin, the better.”

“I’ll take the yellow one!” Roman immediately chimed in, his wings vibrating slightly inside his suit.

—

“There’s three of us, and three of them, so of course they’re going to eat us.” Remus remained blithely oblivious to Virgil’s glower. “It’s lucky there’s not one more, otherwise we’d have to rock-paper-scissors on who gets torn in half.”

Of course, this was the moment that the monsters stopped their odd, chitter-click-buzz noises to turn back to the container, and the first monster, the red one, began to fiddle with the side of the glass. Virgil started to breathe heavily as there was mechanical clicking around them, and then the ground under their feet shifted slightly.

Without another second of suspense, Red reached under the box and slid the middle section out like a book from a shelf. The man in formalwear went with it, stumbling slightly and pressing against the glass for balance.

“Oh hey, you got the freaky insect one,” Remus said, waving cheerily. “Hope your death is really cool and gory! Try not to make it cooler or gorier than mine though!”

“Very helpful,” the man hissed through gritted teeth, his eyes slightly panicked. Virgil stumbled forwards to the front of his section as though he could reach the other human through the glass, terror chilling him. It was a pointless gesture, but as he was carried out of sight, the man offered him a nod anyways.

Remus seemed to be unfortunately correct about them being split up, since next the one with the six arms and rocky skin pried the tall man’s section out and left with it as well. That left Virgil with the last one, a monster whose face was covered in neat fur and long whiskers. It looked at him with way too many eerie slitted pupils, and Virgil couldn’t help but compare it to a predatory big cat. Maybe several predatory big cats.

Its gaze was nothing compared to its size, of course, and Virgil couldn’t help but drop to a crouch, curling in on himself as gloved hands curled around the glass box he was stuck in and lifted it with ease.

The floor of the box was transparent, and he stared at the dizzying drop to the floor the whole transferring process. When there was finally solid ground beneath him again, he looked up and found that his box had been placed on a sterile, shining counter.

Before he could get much of a read on his surroundings, a shadow darkened the floor around him, and he barely got to flinch before cool fingers were descending on him, lifting him from the box.

The hold was firm and clinical; his arms pinned to his sides, and a finger under his chin to prevent biting. The pressure on his throat was just slightly too much, and Virgil let out a choked cough, struggling to breathe through his panic.

Thankfully, it only lasted for a moment. In the next, he was released, and his hands and knees met a solid surface. He scrambled to his feet, glancing around.

The bad news was that he was out of the relative safety of the glass box. The worse news was that he appeared to be in a warped version of a hedge maze, walls and corners twisting around him. The worst news was that the monster was still present, and now it was manipulating some kind of square device.

A heartbeat later, the walls around him started to buzz ominously, making the hair on the back of his neck rise up as he pictured every Saw movie he’d ever seen.

“Fuuuuck this,” he muttered, shifting to his feet and starting down the nearest path. He alternated between making sure he didn’t get too close to the walls and making sure the monster hadn’t moved or otherwise acted suspiciously. The creature was watching him unerringly every time he looked up, and having all those eyes on him didn’t help his increasing unease at all.

As he turned a corner, he was faced with something new, and automatically ducked away in case it was going to start shooting at him. The small orb continued to sit in the middle of the path innocently, at just the right height to take out someone’s achilles heel.

Virgil shuddered and turned around, backtracking to the last fork in the path. He wasn’t messing with monster traps, no fucking way.

Above him, the monster seemed to sigh slightly.

—-

“... just too timid,” Logan was saying when Patton re-entered the main area of the lab. “The specimen didn’t engage in a single puzzle during our session, not even one.”

“What a puzzling situation!” Patton chimed in, carefully slotting his own specimen unit back into the container. Inside, the little creature continued to make a bizarre assortment of calls, not even in Patton’s direction.

Logan exhaled shortly. “Am I to assume that your insistence on wordplay means that you had greater successes than us?”

“Well, you could go with that, but you know what they say about assuming!” he replied, tucking a pair of arms behind his back as he wandered over to the others. “The little guy seemed pretty aggressive, so I tried to see if there were any specific threat calls I could make out, but… it almost never repeated. Either they have very complex body language that I’m missing or my little friend is a few sticks short of a tree!”

The other two looked disheartened, and the linguist glanced over at Roman. “You two didn’t have any luck, either?”

“No. My specimen barely participated in the trials I set up, and so I haven’t discerned what level of intelligence we are working with yet,” Logan gritted out, ears flat.

Patton tilted his head slightly. “Not even the treat ball? Most sentient life forms have no trouble with that one.”

“No, no interaction at all. It may be worth looking for more compelling bait…”

Roman cut in, antennae flicking in displeasure. “Anyways, mine was uncooperative too! I was trying to get a few samples of their outer shells to see what the fabric is constructed of, but it was so resistant after just one layer that I started getting worried that maybe removing any more would actually harm it.”

“Good. Better not to risk damaging them.” Logan turned to the units, nose twitching as he thought. “There are other non-invasive tests we can try, but results might shift if we try different samples for different tests.”

Roman click-buzzed in complaint. “That could take forever, though! We’re supposed to be coming up with significant research, not trading specimens around!”

“Maybe, instead, we could observe all of them at the same time,” Patton suggested, getting both of his teammates’ attention. “After all, isn’t controlled engagement with multiple specimens one of the tests?”

Roman and Logan exchanged a look, before the latter inclined his chin, slowly. “It’s worth an attempt, at least. Just watch carefully for any signs of aggression. They can’t harm us, but they could certainly harm each other.”

---

By the time the monsters finally decided to put them all in a penned-in space with each other, Virgil was almost too exhausted to be worried. Almost.

He shuffled away from where the three bizarre creatures were looming over them, but carefully remained out of grabbing distance from the other two humans. He wasn’t stupid; he barely knew these people.

“Aliens,” Remus greeted them, holding his hands up in an exaggerated pose. “I’ve totally cracked it.”

“You’ve totally cracked,” Virgil shot back, but most of his attention was on the well-dressed man. Or, formerly well-dressed, since now he appeared to have had all top layers except his undershirt removed. “Hey, what happened?”

“Oh, is it not obvious?” the man hissed, arms crossed tightly. “I’ve been robbed. Clearly, this must all have been an elaborate mugging for my blazer and button up.”

Remus cackled. “Yeah right! That suit is cheap as hell!”

The man rolled his eyes, and Virgil couldn’t help but notice the way he was shaking. It didn’t seem like a fear shake, not with this man’s demeanor. “Okay, but are you okay? You seem, uh, cold.”

“Of course I’m not cold. Why ever would a half-dressed, anemic man in a glass box be cold?” the man snapped. One of the aliens moved slightly, and their gazes all flickered up for a moment.

Once it became clear no grabbing was happening, Virgil sighed lowly, pulling at his zipper and shifting the sleeves of his hoodie off. “You’re kind of a bitch, huh?”

The man snapped his head around, opening his mouth to deliver a scathing retort, but Virgil interrupted him by tossing the hoodie at his face. “Excuse m-- oof!”

“Don’t spill anything on it,” Virgil muttered, ignoring the man’s perplexed stare. “You can pay me back with your name.”

“... It’s Dee.”

---

“Did you see that?” Patton bounced on his toes, tugging at Roman’s talons. “It gave away it’s covering!”

“Astonishing,” Roman replied, not tearing his eyes away. “Is it a social hierarchy thing? Did you see any familiar dominance displays?”

“I… didn’t, actually,” Patton replied, face scrunching in perplexion. “Maybe this one is less attached?”

“No.” They both turned to Logan, whose eyes had gone wide. “It was an act of assistance. The yellow specimen was shaking, likely from temperature exposure due to losing some of it’s covering. It was… kindness.”

“Woah, what?” Roman clicked, antennae perking up. “But that would mean--”

“Look!”

At Patton’s cry, they all watched as the other specimen seemed to attack, almost jumping forwards to intervene. At the last moment, Patton’s arms pulled them back. “No, wait!”

Though the small, gangly creature had flopped onto the shorter one, the action seemed to elicit no pained cry or battle screech, only mild grumbles as the two readjusted in their impromptu pile. The one that had given away its covering made a face before carefully folding into a sitting position as well, a seat that kept it between the aliens and the other specimens.

“These specimens were all pulled from different locations,” Logan half-stated, half-asked. Roman nodded, eyes wide. “They can’t be nestmates. What in the galaxy is this?”

“They’re sapient,” Patton blurted, a hand pressed to his mouth. “The sounds, they’re too complex because they’re not calls, they’re words. Language.”

“Language? But, the planet was said to only contain primitive lifeforms!” Roman protested, wings flaring up in agitation. “You’re telling me… Oh man.”

“The heat sharing, the communication, even the extreme caution shown in unfamiliar circumstances,” Logan spoke slowly, as though warming up to the idea. “It… does seem to be a potential explanation.”

They all looked back to the tiny bipeds, now seeing their every action in a new light.

“Well, there’s only one way to be sure,” Patton said, lifting up a hand and waving it slowly in a generic friendly gesture. “We’ll just have to figure it out for ourselves, using our own judgement.”

After a long moment, one of the specimens-- no, aliens-- waved back.

#sanders sides #g/t #space au #giant/tiny #ts virgil #ts patton #ts roman #ts logan #ts deceit #ts remus #writing #my writing #commissioned works #aliens #this is not part of wibar! diff universe entirely :P #ask to tag #not always what they seem #nawts

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iceshard1011 · 3 years ago

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Sanders Sides (Web Series) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders Characters: Deceit | Janus Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Additional Tags: pre janus' photoshoot, he had no right looking that gorgeous okay, yeah literally got inspired by the fact that janus and roman wore the same lipstick, could be romantic or platonic, Insecurity, Self Confidence Issues, Deceit | Janus Sanders Angst, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is a Sweetheart, who is only mentioned once, Making Up, (kind of), Hopeful Ending, Guilt, Makeover, In which i call myself a multishipper and then continuously go nuts over roceit, Ro goes from confused himbo to romance expert way too fast, and that's bias for you, Listen just because janus is self preservation doesn't mean he's got good self esteem, Janus ‘self care’ sanders: what is makeup, Fluff and Angst, Pre-Relationship Summary:

Janus needs to get ready for his turn for that stupid photoshoot idea Thomas offered him. He’s not exactly looking for help, but he gets it anyway.

And… maybe something more.

2k word fic under the cut :)

The mindscape hadn’t seen much of it’s self-proclaimed prince lately. It was painfully noticeable, given the halls weren’t being deafened by singing, and no one was as challengeable or as willing to bicker as much anymore. Patton’s smile was just this side of strained at breakfast. Logan would look up, eyes sparkling and eyebrow half-raised, the beginnings of something on his tongue before he would remember there was no one to say it to. Virgil kept sneaking sideways glances towards the staircase, as if no one could see him.

Not that Janus was bothered, of course. He had always preferred peace and quiet over chaos. He had just… become slightly acclimated to it during his years with Remus.

Except… it did make things exceptionally difficult when Janus needed something.

Even more so when he didn’t know exactly what it was he wanted.

Janus tried not to curl his lip too much as he stared at his reflection. Stupid sides and stupid Thomas and his followers and his own stupid thoughts. This looked wrong and felt wrong and Janus was a few seconds away from burning this damn —

An opening door. It creaked slightly, not enough that it was Virgil’s, but certainly not Logan’s. It was opened hesitantly, not something that Patton would have much reason for. Perfect.

Janus stuck to the shadows as he slunk down the hallway. It was unnecessary, as had been prefaced many times by the others — even Virgil had caught him at one point, in the middle of slithering silently into the kitchen for something to drink.

“You don’t have to do that,” Virgil had said. “You’re allowed to get something to eat.” (Janus had not pointed out that his throat had been parched and itching for water from a dying scream after flashing images had raped his sleeping mind.) “Plus, you look ridiculous skulking behind furniture like that, anyway.” Janus had flicked his tongue at him and left to get his water.

Roman hesitated at the top of the stairs before slowly making his way down. Janus didn’t know what he was looking for, but it didn’t seem to deter him. Once he was out of sight, Janus shot into his room, the door still creaking open.

What did he need? What was he going to need to put on? What were the requirements of this stupid activity?

He didn’t even know what he wanted. What would help? What would cover up enough that he fit the unspoken, stupid critera for these damn photos? What did foundation do? Would it dry his skin out? He was not in the mood to deal with brittle scales.

Lipstick. Roman had used lipstick in his photoshoot.

Janus shot forward and grabbed the first one of the display rack.

“Stealing now, are you?”

Janus whirled around, thankfully crushing the rather embarrassing squeak before it could escape.

“Oh, absolutely,” he purred, but the not-lie was immediately evident the moment Roman’s angry eyes trailed down to the lipstick clenched in his fist.

“You sly little —” The prince marched forward, face twisted dangerously, and despite himself, Janus found himself stepping backwards.

Roman wasn’t violent. He was brash, and impulsive, and when he pulled his sword on whatever startled him, but he had never, not once, used physical aggression to prove a point.

Janus found it hard to believe he would start now, but… Roman had never been driven to such a point before now.

And Janus was the reason.

It was when he had stalked close enough that their height differences were clear enough that under normal circumstances, Janus would be rather annoyed (now, however, he was only focusing on keeping his breath calm and his gaze level), that Roman seemed to notice the way Janus was dressed.

“What are you wearing?” he uttered, suddenly sounding far more confused than mad.

“Something that was certainly all my idea,” Janus hissed, waiting for the disbelieving eyebrow raise, for the look that said You? Really? Waiting, as tense as he had ever been, for more laughing.

Roman did nothing except manage to look even more lost. “Oh.”

Janus wasn’t sure if he felt irritated or guilty at the prince’s crestfallen look.

Irritated, apparently, as his thoughts began to hiss.

Oh, terribly sorry that I’ve been accepted like the rest of you. My apologies that I aim to help Thomas just like everyone else in this damn place. I am so sorry that for whatever godforsaken reason they asked me to put on these ridiculous —

“Well, hurry up and finish the look,” Roman said, as if resigning himself to a fate that no one asked him to.

Janus blinked at him.

Roman summoned a hand-held mirror and held it out towards him.

Janus didn’t quite say ‘what the hell’ — but it was close.

Roman seemed smart enough to read the baffled look on his face. “You can apply it here so I can be assured you will hand it back when you are done. I can’t trust someone like you to return it otherwise.”

“I’m sure you can replace a single stick,” Janus said, just slightly scathingly.

Roman didn’t seem discouraged. He expectantly held the mirror out further.

Janus’ stomach was writhing uncomfortably. He kept his face carefully blank, loath to betray how distasteful he found this, and glared at the mirror. He ignored the bemused look Roman gave him when he struggled with uncapping the lid, and fought against the slight tremors in his hand.

He didn’t get very far before Roman, looking absolutely scandalized, reared back like a startled horse. Janus paused when his mirror was yanked away and glared up at the prince.

“I would appreciate a limited amount of interruptions,” he began but Roman had already dumped the mirror and darted forward to snatch the lipstick from his hand. “Hey!”

“Why did you try applying it like that?” he cried. Janus shuffled, bewildered.

“I know exactly what you’re —”

“No, no,” Roman interrupted, waving his hands. “No. Stop. Come here.”

Janus bared his teeth. “Why?”

“You look like you’ve never applied makeup a day in your life,” Roman said, and suddenly Janus didn’t have any quips to reply with. Roman squinted. “You’ve never used makeup?”

“Because I have always had a reason to,” Janus snapped. Roman raised his hands, which surprised him.

“Right.” The prince beckoned again, but Janus remained rooted. What on earth was the moron trying to achieve?

Roman seemed to pick up on his hesitance, and leaned forward, quietly scrutinizing. Janus bit back on a snarl.

“When’s the shoot?” Roman asked.

“What?” Janus said, slightly more harsh than he intended.

“The photoshoot,” Roman clarified.

“Whenever I want,” Janus snapped.

Roman, rather than retorting, or recoiling, lit up. “Perfect!”

Janus slunk backwards. “What are you playing at, White Knight?”

A flash of confusion danced in Roman’s eyes for a split second before he lost himself in his excitement once more.

“Your makeup, Phantom of the Opera!” he shrilled, bouncing over to his vanity and pulling out the chair. “I’ll do it for the photoshoot! Come, sit, sit!” Janus narrowed his eyes. He didn’t move. Roman faltered. “Or… or not. I don’t —”

“Why?” Janus interjected.

“You can’t get dressed up without a little makeup,” Roman said with a smile.

“The others did,” Janus pointed out, but Roman waved him off.

“It’s imperative to feel good when you should be looking good!” He began to dig around in his draws, pulling out a variety of brushes and different coloured palettes. Janus didn’t know what any of them were for.

“What are you implying?” he asked slowly.

Roman paused long enough to level him with a skeptical look. “You, who came in here for makeup and got caught red handed… are trying to ask what I am getting at?”

Janus glared at him.

Roman gestured to the chair once more. “Sit.”

Sulking, Janus sat.

Roman studied him carefully for a moment before beginning to sort through his ridiculously large assortments of strange… makeup… things.

The prince started slowly, using an odd, coloured sponge, but Janus still flinched when the first cold sensation started to plaster his face.

Roman pulled back as well. “Sorry. Here, this is primer. It’s kind of like moisturiser.”

Janus’s tongue flicked in and out for a moment in consideration. Coming to a decision, he forced himself to sit still and allow Roman to start again. He must have realised Janus was still not entirely comfortable with this setting, so he began to offer what each tool was and what it did as he applied it to Janus’ face.

Primer, foundation, ‘concealer,’ whatever the hell that was…

It was quiet for a few minutes while Janus let Roman work before he finally had to speak.

“You’re… not doing my other side.”

Roman didn’t pause, moving to pick a different brush and palette. “Your scales?” he asked, focusing on where he was working. Janus found the lack of eye contact oddly comforting.

“Why aren’t you covering them up?” Janus asked.

Roman did halt, then, and lowered the brush. He frowned slightly. “Why would I want to?”

The earnest in his voice made Janus falter. The prince’s genuine confusion made his chest feel impossibly wide and too warm. Roman had already resumed his work, completely clueless to what he’d done.

You fucking himbo, Janus thought.

“Close your eyes for me,” Roman instructed. Janus frowned at him. Roman didn’t seem to understand that kind of action required an amount of trust that Janus certainly did not have for him yet. He elaborated with a beseeching, “Please?”

Janus’ eyes closed.

He could tell Roman was pleased when he got back to work. “Keep your eyes relaxed, but don’t open them, unless you want a bunch of brush bristles where they should not be.”

“Pleasant,” Janus remarked.

“Very,” Roman agreed sagely. Janus bit down the smirk.

It was quiet again, apart from Roman beginning to hum the beginnings of a song. Janus didn’t recognise it, and he wasn’t even sure Roman knew he was doing it. But it wasn’t unpleasant, so Janus let it be. The lack of silence was comforting against any awkwardness that could have remained.

Eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara.

Eventually, Roman leaned back, and beamed. “There.” He held up another — how many did he have? — handheld mirror. “Look!”

Janus looked.

Roman’s smile softened as he glanced between Janus’ face and his reflection. “You like it.” It wasn’t a question.

“How do you know?” Janus asked.

“I didn’t push any blush on your cheeks.”

Janus didn’t point out that Roman had moved his hand to Janus’ knee and it was burning through the skirt, but sure. Janus could agree that he didn’t hate the look Roman had given him.

Roman’s eyes scanned over Janus’ face once more, and this time Janus matched his gaze unwaveringly. A smile twitched at Roman’s lips, and the prince jumped.

“Oh! Almost forgot the whole reason this happened!” He twisted around and turned back, jabbing the lipstick at Janus’ face. It was jolting, and Janus jerked backwards against his own will. “Sorry, sorry.” Roman held a hand. “Come here, come back. I’ll be gentle, promise.”

Janus remained still as Roman lined his lips with the paint. The fingers pressed to the edge of his jawline rendered him rather useless against his instincts, anyway.

Roman’s eyebrows twitched downward for a second. He must have made a mistake, because he moved to carefully swipe a finger at the edge of Janus’ lips.

Goddamn it, this was such a mistake.

Janus swallowed.

Finally, after way too long how slow do you apply lipstick, Roman pulled back, seeming satisfied.

“Now you're ready for a photoshoot,” he decided.

Janus glanced back to his reflection. He still had some of his own details to add, but… yes. Janus could almost agree.

Roman went back to sorting through his various makeup supplies. Janus felt a little transfixed with the deft movements of the prince, how certain he moved, how he knew where everything needed to be. A confidence Janus had failed to see in… a very, very long time.

A sharp laugh, vicious and hurtful, the lie doing nothing to soften the blow —

Janus stood abruptly, the chair wobbling against the carpet. Roman glanced up. He seemed to remember where they had been before Janus’ makeover, and for a moment his eyes darkened. Janus braced himself for another argument.

Then Roman’s shoulders relaxed and he tilted his head. “Have fun,” he said. Then, after a moment, added, “You’ll kill it.”

Janus halted at the doorway before he could flee, taken off guard. He glanced down at the prince, who gifted him a small smile.

Janus didn’t smile back. He turned to study the doorway framework. “It would certainly be rather… dismal if you came down for dinner at some point tonight. Presumably, at the same time as everyone else.”

Roman raised an eyebrow, amused. “Oh, truly?” he said. His voice was warm.

Janus sighed theatrically. “Oh, I don’t know. I couldn't argue if you were to try to prove me wrong.”

Roman tossed his head. “Watch it, Noodles. You don’t want to defy a knight.”

“Perhaps not,” Janus mused, regarding a chip in the doorway’s wood. “But a hero never backs down from a challenge.”

He didn’t wait to see Roman’s expression. He wisped away down the hallway without looking back, without seeing what he could have just done.

Like a coward.

He may have just made things worse. He could have reversed everything that odd makeup session had built. He was well aware of the fact that if that was the case he should have kept his mouth shut.

But oddly, Roman’s silence hadn’t seemed heavy. He hadn’t tensed. He hadn’t shouted, or scowled, or slammed the door in Janus’ face.

Granted, Janus hadn’t given him a chance to, but…

As he slid into his room and quietly closed the door behind him, he didn’t feel horrible. And maybe that wasn’t a bad thing.

Now. He set his gaze on his closet, still open and waiting. Where was his hat?

#sanders sides #roceit #janus sanders #roman sanders #long post #cross posted on ao3 #inspired by twitter #sanders sides fic #angst #janus is a sad boy #fluff #hopeful ending #literally someone has probably already done this #so. those skirt pics huh.#janus is unfairly pretty

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