#i dont know how to tag my own writing erm

[graysonsrambles]

4 Micro-Fiction Stories

a bunch of 2 sentence stories for creative writing class. not particularly proud of any of them, just posting to post

Drama

Maxwell Rosenthal died in surgery three years ago. So why the hell was his name illuminated on my phone with the option “answer call” beneath it?

Romance

Ten hours ago I considered Lyle to be my worst enemy. However, I don’t think worst enemies loudly moan each others names at three in the morning.

Horror

“Father, forgive me for I have sinned,” I said. Though I don’t think he could hear me on account of the golden crucifix sticking out of his bleeding temple.

Sci-Fi

I always planned on killing myself. It’s become apparent my clone had the same plan as he aims the pistol straight at my head.

[autistic-katara]

ok i might get blocked by a couple ppl for saying this but the Jackson’s Diary fandom is seriously making me wanna become a proshipper out of spite (read the post before blocking me or whatever please)

like idk if u guys have checked the fandom tag on ao3 recently but theres been a bit of drama surrounding the fact that someone posted a smut-fic of Exer (an 18yo) and David (an almost 18yo, who was aged up A FEW MONTHS for the fic) and they were harassed into taking it down and making a fucking apology post ON AO3, THE PROBLEMATIC FANWORKS WEBSITE.

and this fic was tagged 100% correctly like it was very explicitly tagged as smut n stuff yet there were still a bunch of comments being like “uhm what did i just read 🤨” and when i made a comment defending the authors right to yk, not be harassed for making not even rlly problematic content someone who clearly would suffer withdrawal symptoms if they turned twitter off for too long started arguing with me abt how “erm ackhtually we should be allowed to comment harassment under ppls harmless and explicitly tagged fics cause theres no smut in this fandom and it shocked us” and u could just rlly tell they felt they were more righteous than God in their opinions and yeah so cut to tonight when i’m scrolling through the tag and i see a post titled “i’m so sorry” in which the author made a post basically being like “i’m so sorry for posting that ik it was disgusting it has been permanently deleted” which in the comments a few ppl were telling them that what happened sucked n stuff (myself included // judging by their reply they only did this to stop the harassment which yk, completely fair) and i went back to scrolling since i wanted an actual fic not fandom drama but like 2 posts down there was another post titled “please stop” or smthn like that where someone else made a post basically being like “guyssss can we please not write smut of these characters this fandom is so wholesome i dont wanna ruin it 🥺 anyways sorry this isnt a fic this just needed to be said lol” and like dude, my guy, WHAT THE FUCK?!

this is AO3, this is a fanwork archive that as far as i know was created (at least partially) due to the fact that ppl kept getting their “problematic” works taken down from other sites and the creators wanted to yk archive all fanworks. this is NOT a social media site where u can make callout posts abt how what someone else posted disturbed ur pure wholesome chaste scrolling by daring to uploaded something with *gasp* consensual sex between 2 consenting adults?! (or canonically 1 consenting adult and 1 consenting gonna-be-an-adult-in-a-few-months-but-isnt-much-younger-than-the-first-guy but u get the idea)

like guys, ao3 is not twitter. it is not tiktok, it is not tumblr, its not youtube, its not even wattpad. it is not a social media platform, it is a fanwork archive, specifically one that lets u post whatever kinda content u want (yes, even smthn depicting 2 consenting adult/almost adult participates that are in no way related having sex, ik its crazy what they allow online these days).

and look honestly the callout post wouldn’tve annoyed me this much if it was posted on yk an actual social media. like if it was posted on twitter or tiktok or on youtube as a video essay or even on here, like sure if i saw it id be annoyed that this fandom cant handle the tiniest bit of non-puritanicalism and fuck, maybe if it was on here id even drag myself into a pointless days-long argument that causes me suicidal levels of stress but on archive of our fucking own itself?! for the millionth time, IT IS NOT A SOCIAL MEDIA! u dont make posts like that that u want the rest of the fandom to read or whatever on there because its not that kinda website!

anyways yeah i hope i explained the situation ok, u might be able to check it out urself if u feel like it and yeah idk this whole thing just kinda felt like a wake-up call for me like yes i find incest and pedophilia disgusting OBVIOUSLY and i dont like ppl romanticising it in fiction but idk i’ve seen ppl talk abt toxic antis before and show screenshots of conversations where theyve acted super shitty but idk seeing this all unfold in person and having to argue with these hardcore antis just- i dont wanna be associated with these ppl, if these are what alotta antis r like i dont want anyone to assume i agree with them like at all, whether its other antis, proshippers, or ppl like me who have a super complicated opinion on it. like they harassed a person into taking down their smut and made call-out posts on ARCHIVE OF OUR OWN abt how they dont want their wholesome pure fandom corrupted by gross dirty irredeemable sex. and just yeah hope no mutuals i seriously care abt unmoot or even block me over this since ik a few of u r antis but yeah srry for this i just kinda seriously hate this fandom right now :)

also incase anyone is typing out a “kill yourself pedo” reply/rb rn; i turn 15 on Friday, i am 2+ years younger than ur innocent bb minor boy David and his definitely not already a legal adult boyfriend Exer so yk

[sanrikis]

BAD IDEA RIGHT ? — NINETEEN; forgiving

written portion; wc 319

jungwon was very conflicted.

on one hand, one of his best friends had lied to him for months and was going behind his back and bullying one of his new close friends. his other friends had known about it and didn’t tell him. he was hurt. he felt betrayed. by everybody.

even you. because you forgave him so easily. and got back together with him. the notes riki had given you dug deep, and he could tell they did.

but, you forgave him. you were way too nice for your own good.

and on the other hand, his close friend had forgiven someone who had treated her so horribly. so quickly. so easily. they say love makes you crazy, but really?

was he wrong to still be upset about it? but, was he wrong to say he missed his best friend?

if y/n could forgive him, then shouldn’t he be able to? yes, he was still pretty hurt by what riki had done, but he was still his best friend. being away from riki had hurt more than the betrayal (that’s what he told himself atleast).

and y/n was happy. happier than she had been in a while.

jungwon had knew y/n before her breakup with riki, but they had never gotten to know each other until y/n joined the student council, after the breakup. while he knew they had a somewhat messy breakup, jungwon couldn’t help but become friends with y/n.

as they got closer she learned more about her breakup with riki, and how it was affecting her. while he didn’t know everything, he saw just how sad she was over it. if riki could take away that sadness, then jungwon wouldn’t stand in the way.

he wanted what was best for both of his friends. he wanted them both to be happy.

if that meant trying to forgive riki, then he was going to do it.

—NINETEEN; forgiving

ೀ mia’s notes – erm my god.... hello guys.... i took a much longer break than i anticipated :o!!! i missed everyone sm and i hope i can get back into writing and posting regularly!!!!! tysm everyone for the support and love i have gotten on this blog!!!! I'm sorry this is such a short chapter but I really just wanted to hurry and post

| taglist(open); @thesunoosshining @cherinne @j-wyoung @kqzuhaa @chaeugwi @ningizm @w0nslvr @lazysmushi @mrchweeee @sakuxxi @stilesks @haechansbbg @lilriswife4life @ghostfacd @lovrqis @hiefisch @soobs-things @kgneptun @chanhee-hee @hyuzaa @hoooniversee @coolwitu @star-yawnznn @kangseulgithegreat @lcv3lies @miy-svz (not everyone was able to be tagged and ik people have new blogs so if u want me to update it just ask:) ik a lot of ppl probably lost interest in this story so i dont want to retag just incase T-T)

© sanrikis 2024 do not repost, translate, or plagiarize

[trapped-twins]

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓

hey guys! my names adam faulkner - which you might know me from my friend's band's blog @wr4th-of-the-gods.. lark taught me how to make one of these so i thought i'd whip one up for me and my brother david just for fun

before anyone asks;

yes, we are jigsaw survivors

yes, we are twins

no, we did not enjoy the traps

yes, we do work for jigsaw (unwillingly but yk)

no, we do not like scott

just thought id get that out of the way. christ what else?

i use he/him i guess - i think thats important. davids turn

Yo! I'm David, Adam's brother. Honestly, I don't know how to work this too well but we're gonna try. As Adam said we thought it would be fun. At some point we might drag our other brother on here but not yet. (we found him. thank you tucker) Adam kinda summed up everything so I don't have too much to say, but I hope we have fun and no creepy people get into our dms

hi guys...im back... most of my info is in the band blog but ill sum it up here hi! im annon! this is my second rp blog so i may be a little sucky still the boys are both color coded (if its not obvious), adam being purple and david being green both boys are apprentices - i might write out stuff about that..lmk if thats something yall will want

i see alot of stuff about specs being their triplet and thats still happenin! i have in fact watched his movies- i just dont play specs..a good friend of mine does! (their blog is in the tags, go follow them!) i own four other blogs - the band rp blog; @wr4th-of-the-gods zep hindle rp blog; @zippyzep jigsaws disciples rp blog; @jigsaws-disciples scott tibbs' mom rp blog; @coolest-mom-with-the-coolest-son and my main blog; @one-annon no major boundaries, interact how you want! I do prefer asks are from people 15 and up, just a personal preference. i am open for dm rps or plot rps! anything works, like i said i dont mind. PLEASE be respectful though. as david said, dont be creepy

TAGS adam ; #you dont really know why but you wanna justify ripping someones head off! ➸ ADAM ↪break stuff - limp bizkit david ; #i play russian roulette every day- a mans sport- with a bullet called life! ➸ DAVID ↪sugar - system of a down ooc ; #MANN GEGEN MANN! ➸ OOC/ANNON ↪mann gegen mann - rammstein blog ; #trapped twins blog roleplays; #watch out for that piranha! ➸ roleplays ↪rock lobster - the b-52s tag games; #i cant take what youre putting me through! ➸ tag games ↪you make me feel so dead - pitbull daycare headcanons; #i wrote you and told you you were the biggest fish out here! ➸ headcanons ↪lost in hollywood - system of a down ask games ; #my face is long forgotten my face is not my own ➸ ask games ↪ am i evil? - diamond head duos ; #they'll never be able to separate jekyll from hyde! ➸ david and adam ↪confrontation - anthony warlow from jekyll and hyde the gothic musical thriller w/ @a-muscle-the-size-of-your-fist ; #im gonna give you my love - wanna whole lotta love? ➸ david and logan ↪whole lotta love - led zeppelin w/ @wrathofthegodsfrontman ; #to make things right you need someone to hold you tight ➸ scott and adam ↪tainted love - soft cell (cover by marylin manson) #team rocket is blasting off again! ➸ david adam specs ↪erm..team rocket? from pokemon? #she knows that im a man! she knows that im a moron! ➸ david and specs ↪go man go - alice cooper #and can you hear the sounds of hysteria? ➸ adam and specs ↪american idiot - greenday

[youngster-monster]

i wish i could show you the erm the Category dedicated to my uh. 22 discord wips. but unfortunately i cant send images thru anon and also then you get to see what each individual channel is named and a. none of the titles make sense and b. the titles of some of them make them sound WAY WEIRDER than they actually are because no one save for me and one other person were ever supposed to see the working titles and i dont have any ideas on how to change them so ALAS

im like a zoo animal you get to read off all my facts and i get to stare straight into your soul while not a single thought passes through my brain. i need the world to know about my bad discord wip organization

writing is actually about the full year spent turning into a pile of dust,

all worldbuilding!!!! my oc who started as a kleptomaniac prettyboy is now a god with layers upon layers of lore and i dont know what i did but now hes really way worse than he started and i take great pleasure in describing his antics to friends who werent around to see it happen in actual rp. i shudder to think what would happen if i turned that world into a ttrpg he'd be a freak (TEMPTING THOUGH)

there are and i cannot stress this enough TWENTY-TWO INDIVIDUAL CHANNELS and one of them is the OLD snippets channel - yes, i have two, no i cant explain myself - and everytime i think about sifting through it for writing ideas in moments of desperation i feel as though it will grow hands with which to strangle me with and so i dont touch them. they will rot but its better them than me

i may have to pick up those niche ships again because i imagine it feels VERY rewarding and also then you and the other three (3) people who like that ship can sing kumbayah in a circle or whatever

glad the beastly noises comment was a hit! now if youll excuse me i need to sit down at my computer and listen to monkey noises 10 hours while doing bad animal impressions and brainstorming a wip i wont ever complete ,

Weird titles are one of the joys of writing. I wish I could be one of these writers that give wacky names to their wips but unfortunately in this I am terminally boring lmao if it's not descriptive I am Never finding it again

Grabbing you like Steve Irwin showing off a baby alligator to zoo goers. And here is where the Bad Organization Practice goes :) isn't it neat 😌

Give in to the siren's call of ttrpg-ization.....

With rarepairs you either create bonds of steel with the two other miserable fuckers writing with you or a rivalry that gets imprinted into your bloodline. "He would Not fucking say that" but it's the only interpretation you get that isn't your (obviously more correct) own

(statistically I am this for at least one other kaellidan fan. Probably more. I often joke that whoever dislikes my writing is gonna be really mad about how much of me there is in that tag lmao)

[livums]

One Song for Every OC Pairing

Heyo! I was tagged in the One Song for Every OC game by @sarahlizziewrites (find her post here!).

Originally, I did the post for my OCs from The Marking Blood (find that post here!), but I've had sooo many songs for romantic pairings burning a hole in my head, so I thought I'd do that instead!

Please enjoy!

🌙🩸The Marking Blood🩸🌙

Sonea / Maja

If I'm out of line / Just show me the door / I promise you I / Won't come here no more / If you just tell me / What you think about me / I can collect all my things from the floor

More under the cut!

Sylah / Nieve

It's a secret I keep tucked inside my chest / With this heart of mine that's guilty, not remorseful / There is love that doesn't have a place to rest / But it would have buried you if it had settled on your shoulders

Zova / Cas

Strange is the call of this strange man / I wanna fly down and feed at his hand / I want a nice, soft place to land / I wanna lie down forever

And the choice is yours if you're willing to choose / Seeing as you've got nothing to lose / And I could use a canary

Suddenly, nothing is as it was / Where are you now, Orpheus? / Wasn't it gonna be the two of us? / Weren't we birds of a feather?

Sonea / Nic / Cas

If you weren't mine, I'd be jealous of your love

���🐝Sister Hollow / The Rival🐝🔪

Trinket / Seybryn

All of this is getting just a little too real / And I don't wanna fuck around / I don't wanna, I don't wanna / Punish me to yet another ordeal

I don't wanna talk about the way I feel / Right now I feel like I could never fuck with you again / But it's okay, you'll probably just forget

Trinket / Aviyah

But I didn't die a lover of sky / And now I know why / And it had nothing to do with that fuckin' guy

After one too many facts / I heard, "Who has made you cry like that?" / There stood Aphrodite, where I wept in the grass / With one glimpse, I was seduced / Her immortal face set my limbs loose / Two minds became one / She was second to none / Call me "nothing new" because she was the sun

🧚‍♀️🌟The Romance of the Demigods🌟🧚‍♀️

Kesh / Eve

I stole your fate / And now you're forced to love a man you hate / I know you don't feel the same / But I burn for you

You burn for me?

I burn.

and another one for them because i'm obsessed rn sorry

"What makes you pull the rose, the rose? / What makes you break the tree? / What makes you come to Carterhaugh / Without the leave of me?"

"But Carterhaugh is not your own / Roses there are many / I'll come and go all as I please / And not ask leave of any."

Anyone who feels like it please feel free to do it and say i tagged you lol. anyways i did this instead of writing . oops. also me dropping this without explaining who half these people are...... erm..... forgive me 🙏🏼

[realperson-300]

hi akmm my nakmem is slime fro. Nm the gruond1!! I livr in las nevabdads!!!! Evenjk thoubh my nmae is slime im actualy person!!!!!!human!!!! I have 300 bones,. Quacjity frkm las nvadas told me t o meet humand by oing on the internet snf he showd me this website so peolpe can ask me things an i say thinges !!!! And. I learn abot person!1 not hat i am not human!! A m very much a human!!!!!!!!! Im a uman! Dont worry., this keyboradn thng is harf o use. Ta;ok to e so i can be peros n!!!!!!!!!!! Ook the voce in my had wants to make write thng so im gonna tuype wgat it te,ls me to

The voice sayr this is a ask bkog for see slime sicke l, i dunno hat what mean s but its ok!!!! Iet says tgat his is mostly in karactter!!! So i think ok!!!!! Yeah rthts me!!! Karactrr is pelled ith a c uhhhhhhhhh hjkbjguyioyuiytfurd5f6tg78u9i0ihygutfcty woag i didjt kno i coud do thatbuhuhgyufityoupihugyufiyoupjlhjkghjyfutyioupijlhukgyjfuioupio;ilhukghjyfuityo8up9ihlukgyjftuyihojkbvgfutytyiohjkgtuytiuohgjuyy8ioghjvgyuuiohjkyi7puioyufjgtuit78oyuiyh fumn !!!!! Anfways im make wtiee things!!!!! Now for yoj!!!!!!

——————————————————————————————————

Blog info under cut ↓↓↓

Okay so what you just saw right there was me typing in character. This is a c!slimecicle rp blog! Uhhh slime’s typing is VERY hard to read so on every post theres gonna be the LEGIBLE version under a cut, so erm :b

This is VERY CLEARLY an au based on my own hcs for slime and q, so just keep that in mind! Slime is canonically using a computer to use tumblr here, so it won’t be formatted very fancily. Lemme explain some stuff about how this will work.

I don’t know much about much of the dsmp lore, so you guys are free to mention things outside of slime’s lore, but I’ll have to search around the internet for info on whatever it is. - He mentioned a voice in his head, that’s me. I’ll pop in from time to time to help him answer asks, so if he ever mentions a voice, that’s me! - This is very early into Slime’s lore, so he won’t know anything about anything after… lets say the slimecicle video titled “slimecicle goops up the dream smp” (go watch it if you don’t know when that is!) - All tags will be in character unless specified otherwise! - named anons can send in an ask including where they want to be referred to as being from, I’ll write it down and delete the ask! So now Slime will call you “____ anon from ____” - if you try hard enough, you can feed slime as much misinformation as you want >:] He’ll believe it! - Rp is sadly discouraged due to the formatting of the blog being an actual blog run by him. - If you wanna send in asks as other smp members, go ahead! There’s also nothing stopping you from being someone pretending to be other members. Slime won’t be able to tell you’re lying about your identity, just do it in anon! He will look at the urls of blogs if asks are sent without anon on. - Slime likes talking about how many bones he has. - slime has 300 bones - slime likes gambling - i like gambling - i like talking about how many bones i have - i have 206 bones - :D - sorry got a little silly there guh - im out of stuff to write about. Never started any rp blog like this so im hoping im doing this right :D

[mushroomsandteeth]

Favorite Fanwork Day!!!

Too many to pick just one so lets GO!

I'm starting with people who have made fanart and side stories for my fan fiction because I literally think about them everyday and I'm so grateful.

Again, @rainydogco made my baby beautiful, I love it. He looks so handsome like, I think Butch would give you a kiss if he was real.

@felinalain made a side piece to my enormous fan fic that literally stars an in universe cat named Satan. Its adorable and I love it. I'm grateful everyday that such a minor character got attention.

Now onto ACTUAL Venom content

@deluxetrashqueen made this beautiful, almost-too-smart-for-me fic that combines Venom with the Thing novella. It is brilliant and you should be reading it

@dyradoodles said "fuck you Cates I'm making my own canon! With black jack! And a OT3 between Eddie, Flash and Symby!". Seriously though its a good read and a great dive into the mind of Eddie Brock. (Also check out their art, they good)

Eiichi made this AU that is probably one of my favorite Venom AUs. Its 9 parts and my favorite is probably the camping trip. I haven't been able to read the latest parts of it because I'm a baby bitch who can't handle angst, so, if you like angst there is that.

Nitrobot made this big beautiful piece and if you love Black Cat and minor Spider-man villians you should read it. I freaking love this thing. Also rare OT3 of Felicia/Eddie/Symby but it feels so earned.

old_blue made this and it is like Twin Peaks met Venom and had a baby. I kept trying to guess where it would go. This is like my jam and I love it.

Correction, THIS is my jam. Zuzeca mixed Lovecraft with Venom and even though Venom is my primary special interest Lovecraftian lore is my second. So this is just a sandwhiche of two of my favorite things.

LunaLeaf (Nixye) made this based off of the fic @schadenfiend was writing called "The Hand that Feeds". And I recommend both things cus the fic is great if unfinished and this pie recipe is amazing I have made it three times now.

I have more but I'm gonna cut it off here. Go check out @princess-of-peachtrees fics they are all great and too many for me to pick just one. @owlapinart , @d-erm @mentalrhapsody do great art that blows my freaking mind every time they post.

And if I didn't list you its because I spent over 60 minutes on this one post but I swear if you have a fic I most likely have read it and you know I'm always combing the tags for art. I love the fandom here and all our creators you guys rock.

@symbruary

[miraclealignersv]

Eating for three (Joe Toye x reader)

ask: could you do a Joe Toye x reader in which the reader tries to tell him that shes pregnant but hes like super clueless and busy and doesnt catch on to the clues. Thank you Alex!

A/n: I hope you enjoy! This was so cute to write I love it. (Also I’ve never been pregnant before so I have no idea if this is accurate) anyway, enjoy you guys!

Tag list: @gottapenny @curraheev @wexhappyxfew @bandofmarvels

If there was something y/n hated, it was keeping secrets. Especially from Joe Toye. She didnt even realize it herself at first, not until she started to notice suttle changes. She was tired all the time, would sleep in late and would often take naps throughout the day. Adding on the dizzy spells she at first through she was sick. But all of that followed by the headaches and the cherry on top: Nausea.

She knew something was wrong, at first she didn’t catch onto the symtopms. Not until one night, after dinner one evening. Both Joe and her sat in the living room, he was reading through the mail while y/n watched a sitcom. Until the symptoms were brought up, and the main character of the show was pregnant. The noise that left her mouth after the realization caused Joe to look up from the electricity bill and over to her with a raised eyebrow. y/n smiling nervously and swallowing hard and playing it off as if she was shocked about the sitcom, and not the fact that she connected the dots.

The following day, she waited until Joe had gone to work to make a doctors appointment. Learning that same day that she was indeed with child. After being married with Joe for the past five years, she couldnt imagine anything better than having a baby. Especially having Joe Toye's baby.

That same day, she tried to figure out a way to tell Joe. However she did not know how. Maybe cooking a nice pork roast, with the recepie given to her by Joe's mom. And for dessert Joe's favorite: chocolate silk pie. Humming to herself she set the pork roast into the oven and stood back. only to hear the door of their home open, in came her tired husband after a hard day of work.

''hey honey'' she smiled as she walked towards the entrace of their home. He set down his jacket on the chair in the living room and gave her a tired smile.

"theres my girl'' he smiled as she walked towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck. He reached down and placed a kiss on her cheek before embracing her. "whats in your oven?'' he asked, her eyes widening she choked on air and coughed loudly earning a concerned look from joe. He grabbed a hold of her waist and tried to help her from choking.

“My oven?” She asked, her voice a bit uneasy after the coughing fit. Joe slowly nodded and pointed to the kitchen.

“Yeah...dinner” he tried to clarify it a bit more, y/n understood what he was saying and nodded.

“O- oh dinner! Yeah just your ma’s pork roast.” She brushed it off as she pointed towards the kitchen with her thumb. Joe smiled and placed a kiss on her temple before passing by her and towards their living room.

*

It got harder after that, she didn’t tell him about the baby growing inside of her just yet. She let a week could go by, Joe didn’t seem to notice. Although he was becoming suspicious of the fact that she would wake up every morning at 6 am and run to the bathroom to throw up. Her excuse: food poisoning.

One night as they were getting ready for bed he noticed a big difference. She walked out of their bathroom as he tried to fix his watch. Glancing up he noticed she was wearing her nightgown, however there was a big difference.

“Wait when did that happen?” He asked setting the watch on his lap, y/n froze at the end of the bed and raised her eyebrow in question.

“When did what happen?” She asked, joe pointed to her chest and smirked. Y/n tried to play dumb, but she wanted him to notice. That way she would easily find a way to let him know she was carrying his child.

“That” he chuckled making y/n laugh nervously. She glanced down at her chest and back at joe who had a smirk on his face. “I like it” he shrugged making her roll her eyes at the comment. And again, she didn’t tell him.

*

Two days after that, at breakfast she served her self a mountain of scrambled eggs and hash browns. Joe watched closely as she set the plate down and started digging in. His eyes glued to her while he held his coffee mug in his hand. Y/n could feel his gaze on her, he was shocked more than anything.

“What?” She asked, as she slowly chewed and reached for her own coffee mug. Joe chuckled and shook his head before setting his own mug down.

“Nothing, it’s just like when people say ‘you’re eating for two—“ before he could finish y/n choked on a piece of potato and had yet again another coughing fit. Joe immediately patted her back as she reached for her coffee and took a drink to help. “Whoa, hey babe are you okay?” He asked, y/n only closed her eyes and swallowed hard. This was it, this was the moment she had been waiting for.

“Yeah...” she started and watched as he glanced down at his watch, his eye widening at the time.

“Crap I gotta get to work” he rushed as he grabbed a piece of toast, placing a kiss onto her forehead grabbed they rest of his stuff and started to head out to the door of their home “love you babe” he called out earning a small bye from her.

*

She had a second appointment that same day, just to check if she was doing alright. Going in for blood upon other tests she was finally taken into another room for an ultrasound. To the doctors surprise, there wasn’t a baby.

There were two of them.

The second the doctor told y/n that she was expecting twins, y/n felt a sudden rush with her. She was frozen in place not knowing how to react. Twins. Her and Joe were having twins.

That same night she waited for joe to come home, dinner was ready. The table was set and she changed into something more comfortable. Y/n held the small ultrasound picture in her fingertips and glanced down to see the two little beans. She placed the picture in the pocket of her apron the second she heard the door open. In came her tired husband, a smile on his face the second he saw his girl waiting for him.

“Hey baby” he smiled as she made his way towards her, pulling her close and pecking her lips. He noticed something was eating at her, just by the way she looked up at him. “Somethings wrong. What’s wrong?” He asked, panic taking over. Y/n bit her lip and tried to find the right words, the right thing to say. She couldn’t just blurt it out, she could but... she wouldn’t.

“Joe.. honey—“ she started but stopped herself, Joe taking a step back. His eyes roamed her face and watched as she bit the inside of her cheek. “Erm... remember this morning? You said something about that one saying?” She asked, joe raised an eyebrow in question and slowly nodded.

“The eating for two thing?” He asked his head cocking to the side as she gave him a small smile.

“Yeah! That” she pointed making Joe only more confused at why she was bringing it up. She hoped that maybe he would catch onto it, she loved the man to death but damn he was slow.

“What about it?” He asked looking away and back at her again, y/n groaned a bit and sighed before thinking of a way to explain.

“I’m not eating for two” she clarified, joe slowly nodded a chuckle escaping his lips.

“Right...” he trailed off and watched as y/n brought her hand up to the side of her face.

“I’m eating for three” she winced and closed her eyes before covering them with her hand. Joe only stood there with his eyebrows furrowed, his eyes glued onto his loving wife. He was confused, didn’t understand what she was saying. That and maybe thinking what his reaction should be. Was this a joke? Should he laugh to make her feel better?

“I dont get it...” he slowly spoke, y/n opened her eyes and glanced up at him. Walking closer he placed her hands on his shoulders and stared into his eyes. “Baby..?” He asked, slightly concerned as to why his wife was acting like this.

“Okay, look what I’m trying to say, my sweet, loving, slow, amazing husband.” Joe watched her as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m pregnant” she announced, Joe’s eyes widened at the words that had left her mouth. He chuckled, a wide grin spread onto his lips.

“You’re serious? There’s a little Toye in there?” He asked as he placed his hand onto her abdomen. Y/n smiled at him and shook her head, immediately Joe’s smile to fall “wha- what?” He asked

“There’s two little Toyes in there” she chuckled, joes mouth opened to speak. But there were no words that came out. Only a chuckle before placing both his hands onto her lower abdomen. Y/n sighed in relief the second he pulled her into a tight embrace.

[pestopascal]

fic titles meme

tagged by @xivuuarath​ 💖 and im assuming this is. titled fics. so im gonna have to dig i dont name a lot of fics lol i just slap those bad boys on tumblr and call it a day

i know its supposed to be 20 but i dont wanna talk about the ones i did before this so its 10 lol

the finite (swtor)

unspoken question (swtor)

H.F.S. (mass effect)

between (mass effect)

overflow (mass effect)

mind (mass effect)

tomorrow (mass effect)

lemon over ice (narcos)

for when do men weep (got)

castle of gold (got)

1. How many are you happy with?

probably the got ones actually :) i was just pulling words that stuck out for the mass effect ones idc about those titles so much but the got ones i think are a lot stronger

2. How many are…not great?

wym title wise? idk i could change h.f.s. but i dont think i can say ‘holy fucking shit’ in the title outright so lol it stays

3. How many did you scramble for at the last minute?

i....... scramble???.... idk man i just pull up words and be like oh thats funky! lets do it

4. How many did you know before you started writing/creating, or near the beginning?

none kshekjshfkjh very rarely do i have a title in mind before writing ANYTHING

5. How many are quotes from songs or poems?

the narcos one LOL

6. How many are other quotes?

they are quoted in fic i think the mass effect ones. i know “tomorrow” is a word actually referenced in the fic but i dont remember my own writing

7. Which best reflects the plot of the story/content of the fanwork?

ok i had to go back and at least read my summaries um “tomorrow” is about focusing on the next day ig idk i said its vaguely post thessia but like. its not tomorrow its today its poetic yeah!

8. Which best reflects the theme of the story?

“h.f.s” will when i actually like write it LOL but idk maybeeeee “for when do men weep” like au where oberyn actually does get his revenge but we ALL know revenge is not cathartic !!!!!!! like thats very literal but i like the story read my work. erm otherwise idk the other mass effect ones like “overflow” post horizon and post first trip on thessia iirc kind of thing where it gets to be too much and shepard gets high to deal with it skdjfhskjf

9. Which best reflects the character voice of the story/pov of the fanwork?

"the finite” is honestly one of my faves ive written in a long time!!!!! i had a lot of fun writing my jk and also like esp since i was playing the game while doing it i wrote a lot of it PRE oh shit ur a sith now so it was oddly prophetic in a way and like finite/extent like in terms of the dialogue with her talking about wanting to be a good jedi not a great sith just like what is the extent of that pats myself on the back I ENJOYED IT

10. Which is your favourite title?

“castle of gold” bc i love the imagery of dorne that we never quite get (i ignore the show entirely) and also just like. rly shoved that whole concept of gold and what it means for myrcella in there.

[bakedpieceofchicken]

5am long personal vent

dont interact with this

note: this post mentions endeavor a lot.

context (very important!): I pretty much binge-read an entire tumblr user’s meta posts and I found them interesting and very informative. 

I also read through their salt tag and now I’m compelled to gather my thoughts together considering the literal title I’ve held for months now is “Hawks is a lov member already”. I’m extremely socially awkward, even on this online platform, so I’m not going to mention the aforementioned tumblr user’s name because I’m too anxiety-ridden to try to contact them. This is in no way shape or form an attack on the person’s opinions nor their character. It’s me... rambling about my thoughts about their opinions at 4 am. 

Is it defending myself? Well, not really, because I don’t feel personally attacked. Just because we have a difference of opinion doesn’t mean we have to resort to attacking each other. I found their opinions thought-provoking and wanted to pick my own brain... I picked this time purposely so nobody would see this post :eyes: so like uhm yeah

note 2: “you” refers to unnamed tumblr user. sorry about weird point of view...

anyways let’s get into the meat 

villain hawks

yay or... nay...?

Well, in fanon it would be such a fun idea to play around with. Personally I think there’s potential for League of Villain interactions with Hawks. I would LOVE to see Hawks interacting with the other pro heroes, but the only pro-to-pro interaction we get with Hawks is between Hawks and Endeavor. Because the atmosphere between the pro-heroes feels... disconnected.

Now, hear me out.

Let’s contrast it with the idealized version of hero society provided in future fics. Or hell, comparing the top ten pro heroes to Class 1-A itself. We want to think all the heroes are friendly with each other and have some sort of camaraderie with each other

But Horikoshi doesn’t present it like that. 

The closest thing to that we get is Endeavor and Hawks. Other than that, the atmosphere between hawks and the other heroes seem more strained or tense (the whole miruko hawks thing is fanon). And even then, it’s... well... Endeavor and Hawks don’t truly know each other. Hawks only knows the public perception and image of Endeavor, which is the only thing he’s been given while Endeavor doesn’t truly knows Hawks either. I’m not saying the interactions are fake, but... would Hawks be acting the way he was if he knew about Endeavor’s past?

No. I don’t have any predictor to how differently Hawks would act, but I definitely sense there’d be a lot of disappointment and loss of respect for the man he was rooting for. To what extent? Would Hawks just be in complete disbelief? Or would he react with immediate anger? There are parallels to Hawks and Todoroki Rei--both were picked from the crowd and had their lives controlled because of their “value” determined by Endeavor/The Hero Commission respectively.

But honestly from an objective standpoint, I have nothing to go off of other than the fact that Hawks deeply respects and idolizes Endeavor the most out of anyone in the manga we’ve seen and the fallout of that would be of an equally shattering magnitude...

Ahh i went off on a tangent. the point is... do we really know Hawks? Does Hawks ever get a chance to just.. be himself? Maybe we see a bit of that shine when he’s alone with Endeavor, but as we saw clearly in chapter 186 he puts on a care-free facade for his fans. But in reality... he’s always working because he’s one of the hero commission’s greatest assets. 

and... here’s where our opinions clash. I truly, in the depths of my heart, believe that Hawks is building a reality where heroes have more free time comes from a more selfish desire for himself. Don’t get me wrong--I don’t want to disservice what Hawks has done for society. But also it feels like he’s the type who overworks himself because he feels moral obligation to society when... technically he doesn’t owe anything to society. 

Yes, in superhero shows and whatnot, it’s usually a positive trait that “hey this person’s been born with an amazing power and they’ve chosen to use it for the greater good! Look what they’re sacrificing!!!” But let’s say theoretically that person decides “hey i don’t want to be a hero i just want to be a writer!” Are they morally wrong for deciding not to be a hero even though they would theoretically be good at it? Even though it’s not something they want for themselves?

Because I don’t think Hawks wants to be a hero. But he also doesn’t want people to die. He’s tied himself with these moral obligations to the point where he can’t leave now because he feels it would be selfish of him to. And that is speculation, but Horikoshi isn’t exactly spelling it out for us! So, that’s how I interpret Hawks’ character. Yes, he is a true hero in that he wants to save as many people as he can, even at the cost of his pride his dignity his fucking freedom...

but also, he never wished for that. he never asked to be one who has to deal with all of this. But now that he is, what choice does he have? 

So, yes, we agree on that. But I also feel that his personal desire plays as big of a part. Because we, as humans, naturally want things for ourselves. Our personal desire for ourselves shouldn’t be downplayed at all! That’s why I believe his inner thoughts are worded “more free time” rather than “make society more safe”. Because he has his priorities! He wants the best of both worlds-- it’s a form of negotiation. He can still play the hero and less lives would be taken but he can also having some breathing room for himself like he’s always wanted.

To free himself just a little bit from the stressful life of being a hero. 

There is nothing wrong with being motivated by personal desires. Hawks is one of the most grounded heroes we’ve seen--I think he’s cynical enough that he’s self aware of this selfish desire for a freer life. And it’s selfish to him only because he knows that it would never happen without the expense of a few lives-- lives that he knew he would never forgive himself for letting slip.

I think it’s a toxic mindset.

Because as heroic as placing others above yourself... that attitude is completely unhealthy and I don’t think it should be celebrated. What I want to see from Hawks’ natural progression as a character is recognizing that it’s okay to prioritize yourself. Hell, Midoriya learned this during the summer training arc and failed to retain that lesson during the Overhaul arc! THESE HEROES DON’T TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES!!! (ok i get midoriya’s trying). 

And if it’s selfish to desire more free time for yourself off from work, is it really that wrong of someone to do so? To want more control over your life? To want to do things you want to do rather than what others want you to do?

What does this have to do with villain Hawks? Well, I think a large desire for villain hawks is because it shows the departure of that mindset! Hawks doesn’t need to be confined to his hero persona anymore, he can finally do things he wants to do and be the free bird he’s always wanted to be.

But him becoming a complete villain is... far-fetched. This myself I recognize. I’ve only written villain!hawks once and that was because he snapped after the hero commission executed shigaraki and dabi as a show of power rather than going through the effort of trying to re-integrate the men back into hero society. I don’t want to go too deep because this isn’t the point I’m trying to make, but Hawks realizes how power-obsessed society is to the point where he doubts the legitimacy of the hero commission itself and what they do for society and its people.

But, again, that’s not going to ever happen in canon so I won’t bring it up another time. The point I was trying to make is yeah, you’re right that Hawks would never become a villain. He wouldn’t become a murderer- if he does, he definitely needs more incentive than what we can go off from canon.

And ohhh boy here we go, reaching the erm elephant in the room.

(These are the points made in the salt tag btw)

Is Villain!Hawks just an excuse to write hotwings? And what is the plausibility of Hawks turning to villainy? Would Endeavor being exposed as a child abuser be the trigger if Hawks were to turn villain at some point in the story?

Eh...

I don’t know if I even want to go into the whole “this is just an excuse to make hawks and dabi evil boyfriends” because I’ve never used villain!hawks as justification for that personally. And I’m actually not as attached to hotwings as I am to something like shigahawks... I don’t have any points to counteract this other than my desire to see Hawks interact with the entire league. Because it would be fun to see him interact in an environment he’s not wholly familiar with. With Endeavor or the other heroes or even the hero commission, he has some semblance of control or understanding so he thinks/acts like he knows what’s going on. 

Meanwhile, the League is a huge mess and they don’t have their shit together and wouldn’t it be funny to see Hawks as a part of their crew suffering with them!!! Well, that’s bias. My bias. For fanon. And for the jokes. So sad :(

So... I don’t just want to see more Dabi and Hawks interaction. I want to see more Hawks and League interaction. or just more hawks and anyone interactions overall. maybe thats all i crave

Actually going through the points one by one, let’s talk plausibility.

I already talked about villain!hawks being a... departure from Hawks’ faults in his own character. But it is pretty extreme, I’ll admit. If Hawks were ever to join the League of Villains, he’d probably never use killing as first resort. As we’ve seen in chapter 220, it’s not like the League targets only heroes... but i get the salt tag was made like 5 months ago so it’s not like new information hasn’t been released at the time of posting.

Reminds me of domestichobgoblins’ shigadabihawks fic where shigaraki even acknowledges “Whatever bullshit you’ve been telling Dabi, you aren’t a killer either, are you? So what, exactly, am I supposed to do with you?” And you know? The both are you are right. Hawks isn’t a killer and he wouldn’t become a killer willingly... unless he was pushed by some other greater force but I’m not here to address any of that. He could still provide support to the league in other ways, arguably, or just joining the league could be some kind of message to the heroes or supporters of hero society.

You are right to a degree. Hawks’ sole motivator to become a villain wouldn’t be because “OH ENDEAVOR IS AN ABUSER GUESS I GOTTA TURN EVIL NOW”.

Okay pushing past that, so why would Hawks be motivated to become a villain? In canon? I’ve already warped a lot of this post with my own fanon but I’m trying to keep within the realm of canon for this point specifically since you could take a second to push Hawks over the edge in fanon and be done with it. But why would Horikoshi specificially do it?

The fact is hero society sucks. A lot. And I think Hawks recognizes that fact being the most “grounded” and cynical of the bunch. His views and visions of hero society aren’t warped by fantasies and such (which is probably why he doesn’t like All Might...) so he understands what’s happening around him. He understands the mechanisms of hero society and how “valuable” quirks are viewed as in their capitalist society.

But also, he doesn’t  have that much of an option other than trying to lessen the burden placed upon him. Because he’s a single man, and even with his influence, he can’t change society. He’s powerless to do so, even considering who he is. He’s seen as a role model to those in society, but it’s because of his ranking that ironically fuels why people even look up to him: denouncing that would be kind of silly considering it’s the reason why people would listen in the first place.

And this is the point where I say... Shigaraki had a point. Hero society is flawed. It shouldn’t be so reliant on one person to carry it all.

But also hero society itself is bullshit. The ranking system? Horrible. The fact that the hero commission views them as tools for their own disposal? Horrible. The mere fact they basically bribe Hawks into becoming a hero? Like? “Hey kid you’re the best at being a hero so that���s what you should do. we’re only going to give you financial support if you become a hero so you might as well” like what is Hawks supposed to do in that sort of situation? Of course he’s going to succumb to the pressure.

I don’t believe in this whole “sacrifice for the greater good” bullshit. If Hawks wants to be a hero, that’s a whole another story, but if Hawks doesn’t, then he shouldn’t have been forced into that role. It’s about agency--it’s about letting him decide for himself if it’s what he wants to do. And it’s... a gray area for morality. “It’d be selfish for him to let people die!” Who is in the right to say whether or not he should use his “powers” for others’ sake? Me? You? The Hero commission?

So if Horikoshi goes down the path of “hey hero society is extremely bad and needs to change” and Hawks recognizes the League as a proponent for that change, then with a lot of development, it’s plausible in the future. I understand that Hawks, as of what we currently see, is too upheld by his own morals to ever even think about crossing that line, but people change. Hell, you recognized how the High End arc changed Endeavor and made miles of metas about it.

So, is it really far-fetched to say villain!Hawks is just a dream?

Maybe I’m a fool or an optimist, but I’d love to see Horikoshi take that path. Not because I’m horny for evil boyfriends, but it’d be a nice change of pace and we’d get to see a complete contrast of Hawks’ experiences. And it wouldn’t be easy-it’d had to be done right. Just like Endeavor’s redemption arc--if Horikoshi is still planning it. (Let’s be honest: High End Arc was not a formal redemption. I think it was Horikoshi letting the readers know “there might be something worth saving in Endeavor!” but i digress because i don’t care enough about endeavor (his character and redemption has 0 appeal to me and thats FINE. YOU DO YOU AND I DO ME, I only talk about him when it’s essential to talk about the influence he has on characters I DO care about).

As to why people like to characterize the moment Hawks decides to quit being a villain being attributed to Hawks learning Endeavor is an abuser...

The fallout, as mentioned earlier, could vary. A lot. Hawks really looked up to Endeavor when he was young. Again, shattering to find out something so nasty about the one you idolized.

To know that the one Hawks looked up used his wife just like how the hero commission used Hawks. Like an object or tool at their disposal. 

Would he be vengeful or spiteful towards Endeavor personally? To others, probably yes. To me? I’m kind of in the “eh” skeptical ballpark so I guess we somewhat agree on that. To me, Endeavor being exposed as an abuser would  crush that small slither of childish hope that hero society represents something bigger than themselves. Did Hawks ever get to have the childhood Deku had where he was still cheering on the heroes from behind the screen, or did it get crushed just as quickly when he realized how hero society truly works?

Because hero society isn’t bigger than themselves. It shouldn’t be idolized so heavily as it is presented in BNHA.

At least, not in its current state. And people who don’t fit in that group or agree with its ideals suffer the consequences. Like Shigaraki. Like Twice and Spinner. Like Gentle.

These are all villains that are products of society that promised to stamp out villains. And when Hawks realizes that it’s just a never ending cycle where the people left in between the cracks are the ones who perpetuate the system itself...

Like you said, Hawks sees the bigger picture. And his goal is to lessen the burden of the workload for heroes. There will never be a shortage of everyday criminals using their quirks for petty crimes but what about the bigger picture organizations? How are they going to be stopped? What about examining the root core of the problem and going from there? No more short-term solutions to problems... What can Hawks, mighty number two hero, do even at the expense of himself? Hmm... 

I don’t know, just some food for thought. Something I’ve seen done for villain!hawks is the hero commission throwing Hawks under the bus for some reason and Hawks either a) joins the league to gleam more information but finds himself willing to stay or b) has nowhere else to go and it’s more of a push for Hawks to orbit towards the League.

I am really thankful for your thoughts! Even though we don’t agree on things, I think discussion is still possible (whenever my anxiety stops bashing me in the head) and I’m always willing to accept I may be wrong about something. At this point in time (3/27/2019), we have less than 10 chapters released that centers around Hawks, but he’s certainly intrigued a lot of people considering he’s already #4 in popularity from so little chapters released! I think he and his introduction to BNHA represent the more cynical side of hero society that we haven’t been able to properly see from Deku’s perspective!

And I’m interested in what direction Horikoshi is going to take Hawks’ character in! The one thing I’m truly against is Hawks staying the “good little hero” in the end--whether he dies, becomes a villain, or hell even just stops being a hero is good enough for me. Free the bird or kill him off is what I’d want to see. That’d be enough of a character arc for me. Characters change, and it’d be silly to expect Hawks to stay the same especially since he has a lot of baggage on his shoulders and his current situation as a double agent for the League is precarious--despite him stating that he was willing to sacrifice his own reputation for the good of everyone, there’s no guarantee that he wouldn’t feel at least some degree of hurt over losing the respect of everyone and his colleagues. 

My thoughts are pretty clunky but maybe someone was able to gleam something from my stupid 5 am vent...

I love Dabihawks, even though I’m not as invested in it as say Shigahawks or ShigaDabiHawks (which I’m sure you’d definitely have objections to considering your other salt posts... but not something I want to address here), and I still think DabiHawks is a great ship more so because of the dynamic than the aesthetic. But hey, you ship what you ship, you are allowed to express your disdain for the ship--I’ve certainly expressed my own disdain for the your ship in the past--and your salt posts which probably took like 10 minutes to type out provoked me to type out my own thoughts which took like 2 hours to fully process. Like I said earlier: you do you, I do me.

And again-- I’m not trying to “defend” here nor am I trying to “attack”. I just had things I wanted to say and I hope I DON’T have the attitude of someone looking down on you, because I think you have very valid opinions and thoughts and sometimes discourse can just be healthy discussions about how we interpret different characters. We are literally squeezing everything we can out of one character we love and there’s enough room for different interpretations of the same character ^^ If anything, I actually look up to you, which is why I’m too much of a coward to send this to you because oh my god i am so embarrassed about a lot of the shit that comes out of my mouth and i constantly worry about if im saying wrong things even though im open to people telling me why  im wrong about said things. 

tdlr; villains hawks very good. has nothing to do with dabihawks. villain hawks very good on its own. I agree with tumblr user on a lot of things, yet we see differently on other things. The world keeps spinning--I think it’s more interesting to address differences in opinions rather than ignore them. 

(the person this post was meant for will probably never see this unless i send it to them to whcih im like oh my god what if they roast me to hell and back despite me claiming yes i amn ot trying to destroy them or their reputation i just want to talk about this because i had fun trying to think about why i love villain hawks so much aaaaa maybe i am just a delusional fangirl but im also a delusional fangirl who wrote multiple paragraphs about this so... /shrug)

end. again please dont interact. if you want to talk to me about it, inbox/dm me but i dont want this post to get notes. thank you. hides what have I done... 

this has been sorta meta but not really just chicken fucking around at 6 am and good night. maybe sometime in the next... month... ill have the courage to send this to the tumblr user. maybe when i have confidence... or maybe when i make mel look this over. that was a joke- she couldnt even finish my other meta piece which was shorter than this. :)

[sukisdeliveryservice]

helloo! how was your day milady? its always a pleasure reading your replies too! <333 and i hope you'll enjoy your hiatus :))

also idk i just find parrots rly pretty, and the way the supposedly repeat stuff you say is rly endearing too djhdjfhfb in all honesty, im pretty new to the whole baking thing, but i love making cookies :D they always smell so lovely djfjdjdj i'd love to explore and make more stuff!

you do digital drawing? :o id love to see something! only if you're comfortable sharing though ofc <3

mmm i haven't watched alot of tv shows really tbh. my favourite and the only one im invested in atm is friends, ive watched alittle of modern family and how i met your mother, but that's pretty much it ig jdndjdj

as for movies, i love the greatest showman! it hits a bit too close to home but i always love the goosebumps i get whenever i watch it :) next would be thor ragnorok, which ive mentioned before djjdjs but its just really funny and love it sm, and it was loki's turning point so bonus marks. black widow is also a new favourite <333 though i felt terrible when they were being tortured as kids, but it really showed a new perspective on natasha and her past. i also really like the notebook! everything was so sweet it rly nearly brought me to tears jsbdjdjjsh and finally the shawshank redemption! it was something i didn't rly think i would like, but i was really pleasantly surprised lmao. everything was pretty depressing but it also kinda blew my mind away :D

for songs, my no.1 song rn is nct dream's irreplaceable, idk why exactly but i love that song. i also have a thing for songs that are similar genres to baekhyun's un village, nct jaehyun's try again and jungkook's still with you, so those are three more though im not really sure if they're really the same genre anyways and its been almost a year now and i still cant get over how nct 127's boom makes me feel 💕

hmm for fics, i dont really remember everything i read, but i absolutely loved your ceo cheol fic 🥺 it was so cute and the way reader and cheol work perfectly together T-T most of the time fics like these consist of cold bosses who only show a little warmth to the reader, but cheol was so sweet throughout everything it just made everything so much more adorable and endearing. i really really loved it :'D <333

what are your top 5 of these? and also for the next question, have you ever

been to a concert?

sneaked out from your house?

gone through a one direction and/or bts phase?

had a crush?

had a pet?

performed in front of a crowd?

read a book/fic that you love so much you still think of it occasionally? (yes im asking for recs)

- 💎 anon who loves you lots!! <333

milady?? heh you sound like chat noir from miraculous ladybug (my guilty non guilty pleasure show) i was thinking carefully about these answers thats why it took so long!! i'm going to go to bed after this is posted hehe this is gonna be a long reply so take all the time you need to answer pfft- my day has been lovely thanks to this ask by the way!!

yeah i'd love to show you something!! there were a couple burried in my rambling tags but when we're allowed to turn off anon i'd love to show you!! do you have discord btw?? it might be easier to talk on there afterwards!!

ooh how i met your mother is probably my favourite sitcom!! maybe that and b99. its pretty long and the ending was erm...not good imo but i still think the long length was worth finishing!!

the movies you picked are lovely anon!! i am also a fan of the greatest showman since i am also a big fan of musicals!! it was pretty fast paced but overall the grandeur and visuals of it stunned me and the sountrack is amazing!! i haven't watched black widow but hopefully soon!! and i dont usually watch a lot of western films but i really want to check out the notebook as well!!

ahh your music taste is also exquisite!! so im guessing you're more into like soft pop/rnb kinds of songs!! i definitely listen to baekhyun's music before sleeping since his vocals really suit soothing songs. i really need to check out more of nct's music - hello future was really good!!

OMG ANON YOU READ MY CHEOL FIC??? i was so unsure about that one but it makes my heart squeeze that you read all of it and liked it :'D

okie so my top 5 (no particular order) i'm probably forgetting a few

tv shows - 1. HUGE atla fan!! i even liked legend of korra even though some poeple didn't 2. how i met your mother 3. horimiya 4. extraordinary you 5. yona of the dawn

movies - 1. your name 2. big hero 6 3. tangled 4. weathering with you 5. from up on poppy hill - literally any ghibli i've watched

books (sorry lots of these are manga) - 1. fruits basket 2. haikyuu!! 3. SNOW WHITE WITH THE RED HAIR (IT'S MY FAVOURITE EVERYTHING) 4. to all the boys i've loved before (it's very different from the movies) 5. i don't mean to bring up percy jackson since it's been years but those books are still everything to me

songs - 1. eight (iu, suga) 2. all my love (svt) 3. kidult (svt) 4. dandelions (ruth b) 5. somehow (day6)

thank you for asking anon! i loved listing these out! next to the never have i ever!!

been to a concert? NEVER!! waiting for svt to come to canada, they didn't list canada for ode to you :(((

sneaked out from your house? NEVER i've sneaked people into my house...

gone through a one direction and/or bts phase? I HAVE! bts but it was only for like a month before i fell in love with 13 men...

had a crush? soobin duh i'm beginning to realize now that maybe i've been more in love with the idea of love instead of harbouring genuine feelings // NEVER!!

had a pet? I HAVE!! multiple fishes...rip

performed in front of a crowd? I HAVE!! i've played the drums during school concerts and during a competition a few years back!!

read a book/fic that you love so much you still think of it occasionally?

for this last one i'm going to tie it in into my top 5 fics of all time!! (with mini reviews!!) i should make a masterlist of my recs honestly - when i compile all of my favourites i think that's when i've be brave enough to tag the writers fjdshfdkj

out of touch, out of time by @/by-moonflower // i read this months ago and my heart literally still sinks whenever it even crosses my mind. i don't think i've ever been so emotionally impacted by a fic before and this is my go to rec for anyone who wants to FEEL something. i don't wanna go in depth as to spoil it, so i'll just leave it at that for now.

outlasting the universe by @/by-moonflower // you know what i'm just gonna link their entire masterlist because all of their works (even the short drabbles) are just literary masterpieces. the way they write makes you feel so alive?? and everything just speaks for itself and is so authentic. they make you feel like you're wandering amidst a ghibli film, periof. authentic is the best word i can use to describe their work and this fic is just the definition of beautiful.

bluff and nonsense by @/thepixelelf // THIS FIC. it's my go to rec overall. it was so memorable had such good flow and just genuinely so genuine?? i have no other words to describe it, it's just so ,,, lovely. the plot takes you on a journey and it's woven together so seamlessly.

in a span of three months by @/viastro // i won't be surpprised if you've read this one already because this author is a true staple in the carat writing community and honestly all of their works are simple timeless. this one really hit the mark for the me the most though and i finished it all in one sitting.

wish by @chocosvt // goodness i'm a fan of hoshi fics aren't i? this one was also really memorable for me and i have read it several times!! friends to lovers but they really made the trope their own and added lots of twists and tadbits that gave it so much charm!! i would also rec this as a starter fic for svt :))

phew thank you for reading all of that anon, i really appreicate you taking the time to write such love responses and questions. now i'd like to know your answers for the same questions ,,, have you ever:

been to a concert?

sneaked out from your house?

gone through a one direction and/or bts phase?

had a crush?

had a pet?

performed in front of a crowd?

read a book/fic that you love so much you still think of it occasionally?

to add on:

been to a place/been in a particular mood after a specific event that you wanted to stay in forever?

written a piece of work that sparked energy within your fingertips!!

met a person/have someone in your life who you now just treasure so deeply?

this is getting super long we need to reveal our identities soon fkdsfkjlds

[cowplant-pizza]

rules: 1. pick one of your OC’s. 2. fill in the questions/statements as if you were your OCs. 3. tag at least four people to do this meme!

questions under the cut:

1.)  what’s your name? lola mihn

2.)  do you know why you were named that? i think my mums first cat was called lola

3.) single or taken? taken

4.)  any powers or abilities? nope apart from my amazing dancing skillz

5.) i’m gonna stop you there. stop being a mary sue. erm

6.) ok, on to the next. what’s your eye color? dark brown

7.) right and how about your hair color? black as my soul

8.) tell me about your family members. i’m a single child and my parents live in Korea 

9.) they sound great. what about pets? 4 cats!

10. that’s cool, i guess. now tell me something you don’t like. dogs, i’m allergic 

11.) do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do? i like to write, dance and sing

12.) have you ever hurt anyone before? i hope not

13.) how about killed someone. ...no?

14.) what kind of animal are you? tree frog

15.) any bad habits? i used to smoke but i quit

16.) do you look up to anyone? nah. i like to make something out of myself without moulding myself after someone else

17.) gay straight or what? bi

18.) do you go to school? nope

19.) ever wanna settle down? get married and have kids. yeah with luke hopefully!

20.) do you have fanboys/fan girls? yeah, i run my own social media account that’s pretty popular. a lot of people fan over our cats more than me tho

21.) what are you most afraid of? heights

22.) what do you usually wear? black clothes, sort of punky? i hate to think of myself as hipster but i guess thats what some people would describe me as

23.) what’s a food that tempts you? p a n c a k e s

24.) am i annoying you? cause it’s not over. eh, nah i dont mind

25.well, its not over! ok

26.what class are you (low class, middle class, high class)? i guess middle class?

27.how many friends do you have? a few

28. what are your thoughts on pie? yummy

29.favorite drink? soda

30. what’s your favorite place? the city

31.are you interested in anyone? yeah, my boyfriend?

32.that was a stupid question. … mmm...

33. would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean? lake!

34.what’s your type? someone funny

35.any fetishes? foot fetish

36. seme or uke? what

37.camping or indoors? indoors

I’m tagging; @toxicsimlish, @randomcoffeesimmer, @crabb-sims, @cat-bleps, @bambi-sims, @a-kind-red 

[kiminicricket]

Get to know me #tag

Thanks @whereillbetheothersideofeternity​ for the tag :) 

Rules: tag ten followers you want to get know better.

Name: Kimberly

Gender: Female

Star Sign: Virgo

Height: 5′6″

Age: 26

Sexuality: strait with a spoonful of curiosity<- you know thats actually pretty accurate for me too

House: erm.. i dont know? Grifleclaw?

What image do you have as your wallpaper?: Cough Reylo throne room fight scene AKA the scene that caused me to die forever

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?: not really? I never really liked guys outside my immediate age bracket.. is that weird? 

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? Hopefully graduated and writing or editing

If you could be anywhere else right now, where?: ugh, I can’t choose.. maybe prythian? get me an illyrian mate ;) 

What was your coolest Halloween costume?: Halloween was not a big thing growing up in Australia. added to that my parents thought it the work of the devil... but I once did Cinderella for book week, does that count?

What’s your favorite 90s show?: Sailor Moon :P oh, or the saddle club, loved the ponies!

Last kiss?: my kitty? I kiss his sweet head all the time

Have you ever been stood up?: not that I can recall

Have you ever been to Las Vegas?: No, but looks fun!

Favorite pair of shoes: well see I have a favourite pair a: the pair that I literally wear everywhere with everything, a pair of plain black ballet flats, and favourite pair b: the prettiest pair of shoes that I own that I will never wear again because they were THAT painful but that I cannot bring myself to throw away because... PRETTY

Favorite fruit: Mango

Favorite book: HOW CAN I CHOOOOOOSE?!?!?! I can’t. Nope. Sorry. Next

Stupidest thing you’ve ever done: HA well one time my friends and I were flying to Melbourne and they trusted me to read the gate number.. anyhoos it was getting close to the time of the flight when I realised that I had read the SEAT ROW number as the GATE number and we were at the wrong end of the airport. we sprinted across the airport and only just made our flight and since then they don’t trust me to read stuff... 

All-time favorite TV shows: uhm... shadowhunters, the good place, brooklyn 99, One Tree Hill, Chuck, Once Upon A Time.. dear Lord I watch too much TV

The last movie you saw at the theatre: Black Panther.. And it was AMAZING

This is completely optional, but if you want to play along i tag: (if you’ve already done this before I’m sorry! Tag me in the post!)

@urbisie @elide-lochan-salvaterre @jklaren @tntwme @a-chocolatestar

[inkstainedfanfics]

A Lost Memory

Summary: Newt deals with a loss he believes he can never recover from with firewhiskey.

Request: "I would like angst and angst and tear my heart apart and smash it into the gutters. Regrets and tears and mistakes were made "I never want to see you again" HURT ME"

Word Count: 3,407

Pairing: Newt x Reader

Requested by @red-roses-and-stories (I hope this broke your heart enough) but also tagging @caseoffics @dont-give-a-bother @myrtus-amongst-the-stars @ly--canthrope @benniesgalaxy @thosefantasticbeast2

You run your hand down Newt’s bicep, popping up onto your toes to rest your chin on his shoulder and peer over him to the papers in front of him. “Whatcha doing, babe?”

“Studying the reactive tendencies of various…” he trails off, brow furrowing as the liquid in front of him turns a deep violet shade. “Well, that hardly seems right.”

You giggle and fall back to give him space. “Be careful you don’t let Pickett fall in.”

Newt scarcely appears to process your words, giving you a distracted “hmm” in response.

You roll your eyes and slide under his arm as he scribbles something onto a note. Extending your arm, you let Pickett hop onto your hand. He squeaks away as you draw him to your side.

“Come on, Pickett, we’ll go make supper so someone here doesn’t let us all starve.”

Newt’s eyes crinkle with his smile as he glances up at you. “And who did you say exaggerates the most this morning?”

You stick your tongue out. “I still think you do it more often.”

Newt watches you whisper to Pickett as you walk out, and before he returns to his work, he checks the drawer to make sure the box is still there.

Thunder rumbles, a heavy roll that rattles the rack of vials on the table.

Newt slams a tall bottle against the wooden counter in response.

He runs a hand through his hair, staring at the tiny glass on the table. The world’s wobbly in front of him, everything a smidge unsettled. He runs a hand over his face. The room reeks of alcohol, rotting food, and burning paper, but he barely registers the stench anymore. It’s as much on him as it is on the walls. You would never stand for this.

The thought bites. A pain he can’t control crawls up his throat and forms a thick knot he can’t swallow, choking him.

He chases it back down with a shot of firewhiskey.

Rain pounds into the dirt just outside the tiny shack, an effect of a storm that has been ravaging the case for weeks now. Newt hardly even notices the quaking building or the spilled ingredients for his elixirs. He can barely tell the difference between the ground shaking and his own shaking.

Another boom of thunder has a stack of books toppling into Newt’s lap.

“Newt, darling, have you seen my book? I could have sworn I left it on top of the dresser.” You stand in a ray of sunlight, squinting at Newt.

Newt glances up from the manuscript in front of him. “Sorry, love. I haven’t seen it.” He chuckles at your answering pout.

“Where in the world did it get to?” You mutter to yourself.

Newt chuckles once more and returns to his writing. The book needs little more to be considered complete, and he’s anxious to finish it. He spends nearly all his free time writing or working with a new creature. You mutter something else to yourself, gathering his attention again.

Newt’s heart swells with love. You’ve been so patient, so understanding of him and his job. You’d taken up the chores he misses with no complaint, been more than happy to cater to his creatures if he was occupied with another. The tip of the quill drifts to his mouth as he gets lost in his thoughts. He really couldn’t ask for anyone better, anyone more beautiful or with a better sense of humor than you, anyone that understands him more than he thinks even he understands himself sometimes.

Despite the urgency of the manuscript in front of him, Newt allows himself a peek at your confused expression as you lift a pillow. His heart stumbles at the sight as you bite your lip and place your hands on your hips, peering around the room. Bloody beautiful.

His hand instinctively drifts to his pocket, fingers grazing over the box in it.

Soon.

Newt grins and puts his quill back to paper. Very soon.

Newt lifts the bottle, examining the amber liquid in the dim light of the one lightbulb swinging above him. The others have shattered, consequences of violent reactions from two ingredients.

He hears the footsteps even over the growling thunder.

Tina flinches when she steps in as the shack’s stench strikes her.

Newt doesn’t bother to look at her.

“Newt, it’s supper time.” She says between coughs, trying to shout over the howling wind.

“Is it already so late?”

Tina brushes rain from her face, taking a breath as her perfumed wrist nears her nose. “Already?” Tina says it in a voice that indicates that she knows Newt’s aware of what time it is.

Newt clenches his jaw. Of course he knows what time it is. He always knows now. Always knows how long it has been since he found out. Who else is going to keep him on time now?

You stand in the doorway of the shack, hands on your hips and storm brewing in your eyes.

Newt gulps.

“Newton Artemis Fido Scamander.” It’s the first time you’ve used his full name.

Newt pinches the bridge of his nose, ducking his head. “Something wrong, love?”

“Is something wrong? Are you serious?”

“Erm, yes?”

A wrong answer, evidently. You huff, stomping into the room and glaring at the vial in his hand. “Do you even realize what time it is?”

Newt hazards a guess. “Just before noon?”

“It is nine thirty at night, Newt. Nine thirty. Do you know who was supposed to come over at eight tonight?”

Realization dawns on Newt just before you answer your own question.

“Your publisher. Do you know who I had to spend the last hour and a half talking with and assuring over and over that you would be here soon?”

“My publisher?”

“Good, you’re catching on.”

“I’m sorry, love.” His heart sinks. You hate being a hostess and hate lying, both of which he’d caused you to do just now. Newt sets his notes down; the breakthrough on a cure for obliviate seems far less newsworthy now.

“Sorry isn’t enough. You need to pay attention to the time.” Your anger is quickly fading at Newt’s solemn gaze, though. “What would you do if I weren’t here for you?”

A small smile twitches at the corner of his mouth. “Turn into dust and float away, if you’re to be believed.”

“Yes, well, I should be believed. I’m pretty smart.”

“You’re absolutely brilliant.”

You feel heat creeping into your cheeks. “You’d better remember that.”

“Who could forget when they win the lottery, my love?”

Newt just shrugs, hands trembling around the shot glass now. “It’s easy to lose track of time down here.”

“Newt, don’t lie to me.”

He glances at her, the shadow of a smile on his lips. “What purpose would that serve?”

“You need to eat.”

“I do.”

A plate of eggs and rotting bacon Tina brought down three days ago sits on the ground, tossed carelessly aside. Tina and Newt both look at it for a moment.

She sighs. “You’re going to die down here.”

He thins his lips. “I’ll be fine, thank you.”

“Newt—“

“Tina.” He interrupts, hands fully shaking now.

She ignores the interruption. “You need to take care of yourself. Do you really think she—“

“You have no right.” The words are quiet, a threat in themselves.

Tina persists. “You can’t let this happen. You’re better than this.”

The words are close, so close to what he used to hear and the memories are rushing back now, a catastrophic avalanche of thoughts he can’t stop, can’t end. Newt’s hands tighten around the glass and bottle he’s holding as he tries to block out the tidal wave of memories flooding him.

Tina’s footsteps pound against the floor, and she slams open the door, half falling into the room. “Newt!”

He shoves the box behind his back, snapping the top shut. “Everything all right?”

“She’s gone.” Tina’s face is red and she’s panting, not a line of amusement or composure in her face.

Newt feels his entire world stop on a dime. “Gone where?”

“Ambushed. Come on, we have to go.” Tina grabs his arm, pulling him half to his feet before apparating away with a pop. Newt’s grip loosens as he feels himself get sucked into that tube.

The ring box clatters to the ground and pops open, a small gold band rolls out and spins, spins, spins, finally falling after a minute. A heavy silence fills the room.

Tina takes a step forward, crunching broken glass underfoot. “Newt, are you all right?”

Newt clenches his jaw, heart pounding. All he can see is you, that day, with that blank stare and the cut and your words. Oh Merlin, your words.

The alcohol makes it all the more easy to fall into the sight, to smell the rancid odor of too much spilled blood and hear the way you spoke to him.

The shot glass strains in his hand, and Tina’s calls to him fade away into a distant noise.

Sweat drips from the tip of Newt’s nose and lands on his top lip, but he doesn’t brush it away as he ducks behind a shelf in the grocery store, dodging another curse.

Ambushed by fanatics. He curses Tina under his breath as he throws another spell over the boxes. She should have been paying more attention, focusing more. You could be in trouble because of her, could be dying. He stops breathing as the image hits him. You, lying motionless, not breathing, not smiling, not speaking. Just dead.

Newt shakes the thoughts from his head. You’re strong, a witch that knows how to fight. You have to be holding your own. You can’t be… He forces himself to take another breath and peer around the shelf. What matters now is finding you and getting you out of here, free from danger. Newt dives out from his hiding spot, running down the aisles, scanning them for you. Spells crack behind, breaking against cans of beans. His boots squeak against the tiled floor as he turns, rushing down another aisle.

He’s being reckless, and he knows it. Tina shouts at him as he dodges curse after curse, leaving the casters behind for the other MACUSA officers to deal with.

A spell splits open the skin on his cheek, but he just keeps sprinting down the aisles, searching for you. The smell of burnt flesh makes him gag, but he doesn’t slow down.

Newt pauses in the last aisle, legs nearly giving out in relief. Maybe you escaped, maybe you made it out. He gasps in two breaths and moves again.

He pushes a door open to a freezer room and you’re there on the ground, unmoving, a man next to you with a wand pressed against your temple.

Newt shouts his curse, a wave of rage surging through him at the sight. He sends the man reeling back, head cracking against the concrete wall. The stranger doesn’t move.

Not that Newt cares as he sprints to your side, dropping into a puddle of blood, a scream bubbling out of his mouth as his fingers press against your neck, searching desperately for a pulse, a breath, anything to prove that you’re still alive.

He sobs in relief when he finds one, a strong but rushed beat. You’re alive.

Newt kneels next to you, wand hovering over every small cut on your body. There aren’t many, thank Merlin. His hands shake and he can barely breathe when he finds a gash in your side, the one the blood covering the floor must have come from.

Newt’s pale face is the first thing Tina notices as she bursts into the room. Her own shriek echoes through the room at the sight of you unmoving on the ground, but Newt shakes his head, words trembling.

“She’s all right, just unconscious.”

She falls onto her knees next to you, “Not dead?”

Newt’s entire body shudders as he takes your hand in his. “No.”

“Oh, thank heavens.” Tina shakes her head. “I don’t know what happened. We were attacked out of nowhere, and one of them grabbed her. I couldn’t get her free, couldn’t get a clear shot on him.”

Newt thins his lips but nods. “This wasn’t your fault, Tina.”

She visibly relaxes at his sentence, letting out a breath. “The others. I have to check on the others.”

She stands, one final anxious glance at you, but leaves the room.

You stir minutes later, squeezing your eyes shut tight before finally blinking them open and gazing up at Newt.

Newt’s grip on your hand tightens as you prop yourself on one elbow. “You’re okay, love. It’s okay.”

“Where am I?”

Newt smiles a little at your confused expression. “The grocers. There was an attack, but they’re all gone now. You’re safe.”

You run a hand over your face. “What… how… what happened?”

Newt shudders in relief as he tugs you tight against him and explains. “Quite the eventful day, hmm?” The joke is weak, a fragile attempt from a fragile person. He takes a deep breath and reminds himself: you’re still here. Thank god.

You lean away from him. “Can I go?”

Newt nods. “We can go home.”

“We?”

He smiles weakly. “You plan on leaving me here?”

Your face screws up in confusion. “I’m sorry…”

Newt’s aware of Tina re-entering the room but he doesn’t turn around. “Home. The case, remember? You’re always nagging me to clean it up.”

You shake your head slowly.

Newt’s breaths quicken. “With the creatures. Frank and Clyde and Marietta. You know what I’m talking about. Even Pickett’s there right now.”

“Pickett. Who’s Pickett?”

The ground drops out from under him as he realizes the spell that must’ve been cast. The only memory spell he knows can do such extensive damage to a person, but no. He smiles gently at you, there’s no way your entire memory was wiped of him. Something, somewhere, there must be a memory remaining, a lingering bit of him that Obliviate couldn’t touch.

“The bowtruckle. A little pest sometimes, though I hear he’s more helpful in the kitchen than I.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know you. Thank you for saving my life, but I don’t… I just want to go back to my hotel room and sleep.”

Newt stops breathing. “Sorry, love, what?”

You slide away, flinching at the feel of the slick floor beneath you. “I have to go.”

Newt’s hand reaches for you and wraps gently around your wrist. “Love, where are you going?”

Your eyes flicker to Tina behind him, a mixture of fear and pleas.

Tina steps forward, resting a hand on Newt’s shoulder, her own heart breaking as she recognizes the look in your eyes too. “Newt, I don’t think she recognizes you.”

Newt desperately tries to hold his world together. “No, no that’s not possible. That isn’t-that can’t be true. We – we love each other.”

You slide further away, wrist slipping from his grasp.

Newt shakes, breaths trembling. “Love, come on. You can’t have forgotten me, can you?”

Tina gestures at you with her chin. “Get her to St. Mungo’s. See if they can recover anything.” Her voice softens as two women Newt didn’t notice before step to your side. “Newt, I’m so sorry.”

He sits there in the puddle of blood, unable to stare at anything but your gaze, a mixture of panic, fear, and utter bewilderment at his reaction. At this violent reaction you believe to be coming from a stranger.

“Maybe they know how to cure obliviate’s effects there. They’re good with maladies. I know that Queenie had to send a friend there once…” The words fade into nothing for Newt, just a background noise he can’t bring himself to care about.

Newt wonders if he’ll be sick right there as his stomach churns and a loud ringing deafens him to Tina’s words. He watches you back away from him, grabbing the arms of one of the women and clinging to her.

He’s supposed to protect you, supposed to keep you safe.

He failed, and now he’s paying the price.

You disappear with a pop, eyes wide and body shaking like Newt’s, but not a shred of recognition in your eyes.

Newt becomes aware of the glass bottle in his hand again. An urge to throw it, send it crashing and cracking open against the ground grips him. Break it. Destroy it like you destroyed him.

Newt sets the bottle down carefully, jaw clenched tight.

He won’t break it, not when he needs to start rebuilding himself.

He tunes back in to Tina’s lecture. “—two months. I know it’s hard, but you need to take care of yourself before you research anything.”

“Tina, take this and go.” He crumples a sheet of paper in his hand, shoving it at her. The world spins.

She coughs at the burning smell of firewhiskey on his breath. “What’s this?”

He slumps in his chair. “Her new address.”

Tina stares at him, lips parted in surprise. Her voice is soft again, as though she’s speaking to a child. “Newt, I’m not saying you should give up. Just give it some time. Maybe you’ll find something; a potion or a new spell.”

He shakes his head. “Stop it.”

“She isn’t gone.”

He doesn’t understand why she’s so adamant, so demanding of him to have hope until he drags his gaze up to meet hers and finds his misery reflected in her eyes. A lesser amount, sure, but the skin around them is red and puffy, a telltale sign of her own tears. He wonders for a moment if she’s right. Should he hope? Should he contact you and try it all again?

But no, that’s all bullshit. A tide of anger rises in Newt. What does she have to be angry about? Who is she to make demands of him, to instill him with a hope that is a complete lie? You’re gone. You’re bloody gone and there’s nothing either him nor Tina can do to bring you back to the person you were.

His fingers itch to grab the bottle and smash it against the table to quell the agonizing pain the hope always carries with it.

Tina’s breath catches at the unequaled grief in Newt’s bloodshot eyes. The black bags hanging under them and the stark contrast of his paled skin only emphasizes the gravity of his expression.

Tina’s voice leaps into a higher pitch. “She can’t be…” she clears her throat, next sentence more aggressive and assured. “She isn’t gone.

Newt’s voice is as flat as he can keep it as he suppresses the anger at her; it’s filled with numb pleasure he can only find in bottles of firewhiskey now. “She doesn’t recognize me, let alone remember a single thing I’ve ever said to her.” His voice breaks. “She’s gone, Tina. You need to accept that.”

“I can’t. I won’t.”

Newt shuts his eyes, picturing your face as he grabs the bottle again. “Fine. But don’t bring this up to me. She’s none of your business.” He can almost see the jab hanging in the air, and the slicing agony of Tina’s demands is fresh in his mind, so he takes it. “Not when you’re the reason she’s gone.”

Tina turns to stone at the comment. She takes three deep breaths, teeth grinding together, before smashing the ball of paper in her hands. “Fine, Newt. If you want to live in some fairytale land where she just stops existing because she doesn’t love you anymore, go ahead, but I’m sure as hell going to find her again and become her friend because we can still do that.”

“Just remember when you’re with her that you’re the reason you have to redo everything.”

Tina shrieks in frustration and storms out into the rain.

Newt sighs through his nose, a long breath that eases some of the tension in his shoulders but fails to remove the weight still tugging down his chest.

One more night.

One final night of mourning you. Newt will start rebuilding in the morning.

Thunder rumbles a final time, a long roar that sounds something close to your laugh as it rises and falls and rises again.

Newt squeezes his eyes shut and when he opens them again, Tina’s gone, you’re gone, and he’s all alone.

[phantom-jade]

Alphabet tag game! I have been tagged by @neonacidtrip not done one in a while if any so here it is.

Rules: answer the questions below and tag people who you want to know.

A- Age: 24

B- Birthplace: England

C- current time: 09:48am

D- Drink you last had: Cherries and berries squash (because I struggle to drink plain water due to its taste)

E- Easiest person to talk to: Probably mu childhood friend and my friend who lives in the same town as me currently.

F- favorite song:  erm this changes so frequently and am in a in-between phase on music so not listen to much music at the moment.  but the last song i was obsessed with was this one, Not the original but the google translate version. I relate to it so much more.  

G- grossest memory:  seeing my friend hand covered in her own poo and a lot of the bathroom when she was trying to clean the loo but failing. (flat mate at uni good friend but often had to teach how to clean something like the loo)

H- hogwarts house: Ravenclaw through and through 

I- In love: do fictional characters count? changes but currently a certain blue king from K

J- jealous of people: can be but more frequently of animals -their lives are simpler. 

K- killed someone: nope, I like games but often die if that counts???

L- love at first sight or should I walk by a few times: I’m miss oblivious so walk by many many times.

M- middle name: Emma

N- number of siblings: two older sisters. 

O- one wish: probably to but more trust in god

P- person you last called: my friend who lives in the same town ( dragging her over to watch k with me )

Q- question you are always asked: ????just normal questions like what is your job etc.... there is no regular question ( I need to socialize more)

R- reason to smile: when I feel like it , just because I don’t smile doesn’t mean I’m not happy, I just express myself a little differently. 

S- song I last sung: humming Magika my Kalafina. If you count word then  Tsumetai Heya, Hitori by Komatsu Mikako.

T- time I woke up: 9am because I have no job currently and dont want to sleep the days away so have alarm set.

U- underwear colour - purple

V- vacation destination- dream or what normally happens? dream- japan as i like the culture but I normally just go to other European countries near by. Been to Amsterdam a few times as I have family there.

W- Worst habit: picking scabs until they leave scars particularly ones on my face and arms. 

X- Xrays I have had : dental, and also hand and a foot. broke my big toe falling over a hurdle, but managed to not brake my finger in a door but it was sprained thankfully I regained writing abilities to write in time for my finals at uni (hurt it a week before my 1st exam that year)

Y - your favourite food: errrr errr dont really have one I like all sort so a buffet or maybe bento type box?

Z- Zodiac sign : caner (snipity snip snip snip and moves sideways like a crab)

Excuse any spelling/grammar mistakes I often make them due to dyslexia 

Was fun and thanks for the tag

I tag: (completely optional you don’t have to do it)

@allthingsawkwardaboutme

@barakery

@wmctalon

@that-delphin

Hope you enjoy for day!