#i don't know how to feel about the fact my last GG drawing was a millia one

[codexbrainhasbrokenfreee]

unfinished GG sketches dump

i've made peace with the fact i'll never finish them

[bonny-kookoo]

I APPLAUD YOU BONNY.

Hey bonny. First off darling..your works are BEAuTIFUL. I especially loved Gg (no surprise there), Rabbit Boy and the Catch it! series.

I just completed reading the catch it series (it's been less than 20 min since I read the last chapter) and I'm so in love with the concept!! It gives just the right amount of butterflies. It also subtly addresses the fact that humans in fact are really as foolish with their ego (like you portrayed regarding earth being close to destroyed).And it also breaks the stereotype of mothers being closer to their children more than father's and I need to thank you for that. Because society usually tends to think of a father's care as lesser important than a mother's and that makes the child feel neglected by their father most of the time. I don't know if it was intentional or not, and it doesn't matter really because I absolutely LOVED it!!

Now, moving on the next part of what I think is amazing. Your takes on themes such as ddlg and bdsm.

It's been close to a year since I've been reading your fics and I'm immensely impressed and mesmerized by the way you describe the importance of consent and care during 'scenes'. To a very large extent, you were able to portray that experiencing sub-space, dom-space and little-space make the person vulnerable, (and almost dangerous in a way).

Most writers on Tumblr and other platforms portray bdsm and ddlg as themes which are purely physical. They never choose to write about how mentally involving it is too. And in their fics, it feels almost as if the reader is obliged to feel comfortable with these themes. But you dear, have made it such an intimate thing. To show that one will try their best not to slip into their spaces unless they COMPLETELY trust the other person. It reveals that these fantasies are possible (in real life too) only and only if there is a feeling of safety and trust in the relationship.

I feel like you draw the line between real life and fiction. And this line is drawn very tenderly. Bringing us back to reality in a very gentle way. You take us with you on a journey once we start reading, and by the end of it, you slowly, but surely drop us off into reality. Very artistically. You have enormous skill and talent.

You're one of my biggest inspirations in terms of writing. Not saying this just for the sake of it. You really are!! Thankyou for the fruitful hard work you put into these works.

(I think I'd squeal if i actually meet you in real life tbh 😂🤷. I'm a huge fan.)

Righttt. I think imma head out now. Adios 😜😍

First of all thank you so much for all that.. I'm glad you feel that way towards my writing ^^ I'm personally someone who like to see things as "I'd like to see someone write about this/that.. so I'm gonna write it!" haha. So I guess thats the main reason why I started writing in the first place?

I'm glad I can make someone's day with my writing. Makes me forget that my socks are still wet and someone stole my bodywash lmao.

[theji]

Song of the Moment: 匿名的宝贝 Anonymous Darling

Today's song recommendation isn't directly related to Yizhan but rather, a BJYX fan fiction [As You Wish]. The original Chinese version is considered a classic within the fandom and there's even a book version of it now. I first read the fic about 3 months ago after seeing it in @rainbowsky's recommendations list. It's a long read, more than 90K words but I finished it in one sitting. That's how invested I was in the storyline.

(Side note: thank you Rainbowsky for the list. Your recommendations are excellent and most of them are right up my alley. If anyone's keen, here's the list. Check it out!)

I re-read it again last night and it just hit me even deeper the second time around. First time was really just to get the plot moving along but on my second read, you get to see more of the nuances, pick up clues that you missed previously. Generally just got more deeply into the main characters' headspace.

What I like about it is its simplicity and realistic portrayal of life and love - two people who understood the realities of life's circumstances and chose to put themselves first, and that any relationships take effort and courage to work. There's no fancy or dramatic plotlines, no major conflicts or antagonists or whatever, but it just draws you in.

Two ex-lovers, meeting again, walking on eggshells, awkward conversations, testing boundaries, wanting but held back by fear and uncertainties. Of personal growth and maturity. Of love lost and not found, but rather, rebuilt. It's not a fairy tale - there's light angst, some tension, sweet moments, awkwardness, etc but a worthwhile read, I assure you. I'm even planning to read the fic in Chinese next to experience it as the author intended.

Anyway, back to the song. Anonymous Darling is a 2004 song released by Singaporean singer-songwriter/rocker Huang Yida. I had known of this song back then when I was a teen cos my sis was a fan of him. We even went to his autograph session 😅. In the fic, the song is quite a central part of the plot, like a theme song of sorts, and the lyrics were used to portray some of the characters' innermost thoughts. After re-reading the fic, I put the song on replay. All the feels...hence the inspiration for this post.

Anonymous Darling is a love song, but a bittersweet one. It's about someone who once had a great love but then lost it. Instead of pining over it or being resentful or nonchalant, they chose to keep it hidden deep within their own heart, to safeguard it. The love and yearning is still there, it's still beautiful, it's precious. Even if it doesn't come to fruition, it won't ever be forgotten.

我思念在你眼中那一片海水 How I miss the view of the sea (tears?) in your eyes

有一种让我心痛的美 It's devastatingly beautiful

于是我选择自已孤单的睡 That's why I chose to sleep alone (to leave)

下半辈子让我不相信的理由 我想是你对不对 I guess you're the reason why I stopped believing for the rest of my life

妳是个匿名的宝贝 藏在我心里的眼泪 You're an anonymous darling, hidden in the tears within my heart

不管妳带走了什么 我都因为爱过妳觉得美 No matter what you take away, I'll always find it (the relationship) beautiful because I once loved you

永远不忘记妳的我 像一个孤魂和野鬼 I will never forget you, just like a lonely soul and wild ghost

在这个世界上受苦 风吹雨打 我都无所谓 Even if I have to suffer hardships or endure the wind and rain, it doesn't matter at all.

妳是个匿名的宝贝 常在我心里飞呀飞 You're an anonymous darling, fluttering around in my heart

如果还能有那一天 请妳 回头看我一眼醒了没 If that day ever comes, please turn back to look at me and see if I've woken up

不必安慰我 妳知道我不累 oh 爱妳怎么会累 Don't need to comfort me, you know I'm not tired. How can loving you be tiring

再一次站在雨中看着天黑 Standing once again in the rain looking up at the dark sky

我觉得我在人海里潜水 It feels like I'm diving in a sea of people

带妳的名字飞往东南西北 Carrying your name with me to North, South, East, West

我要让这个地球上除了我 再也没有人能知道 妳是谁 妳又是我的谁 Except me, I don't want anyone else in this world to know who you are, and who you are to me.

I hope you'll enjoy today's song recommendation. It really brought back memories of my teenage days. Haha..and also enhanced my appreciation of the fic. Sorry, this post was not meant to be a fic recommendation but I'd be happy to discuss the story separately with anyone who's keen.

Since I'm on it, might as well recommend a few other Huang Yida songs that I liked back then. I think he's now focusing more on song writing and has penned songs for several hit drama series in China. He's on Spotify too.

(Ok I realised I like a lot of them so I'll just list some. I love soft rock, which he does very well.)

That Girl Said To Me

Blue Sky

That Girl

Every Day and Every Night

Only Understand When You Love

Love Under the Microscope

Go Away

Like You (Like Me)

A Second of Comfort

Equilateral Triangle

A Song to Myself

Heart Disk

Simple (fun fact: GG's idol Stefanie Sun penned the melody to this. In fact, Yida was dubbed 'the male version of Stef Sun' when he debuted.)