#i don't know how to explain this in a way that makes sense but like
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dollsltt · 3 days ago
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MAMA, A BIRD BEHIND YOU.
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⠀⠀ ᡣ𐭩 ⠀ ⠀⠀angel!reader x dean winchester
sum. just angel!reader having a staring problem, and perturbing dean’s sleep with it.
includes. fluff, pet names (duck, duckling, sweetheart), it’s my first drabble have mercy, english is not my first language.
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Dean jolted awake, his heart felt like it wanted to jump out of his chest. He wasn't sure what had disturbed him so much —a nightmare, maybe, or that weird squeaking sound the bunker floor made from time to time— but something felt... off. He blinked a few times, trying to get rid of the drowsiness and blurriness in his eyes. Then he saw you.
You. Fuckin' duck. He thought.
You were standing perfectly still in the corner of the room, your hands clasped together in front of you, staring deeply at Dean.
"What the fuck-" Dean wanted to yell at you, but he'd be lying if he said he wasn't used to it. It was maybe the fifth time this week you'd taken it upon yourself to wake him or Sam with your eerie, silent presence. "Duckling, what are you doing here?" he asked as he sat up in bed.
You stared at him for another few seconds, blinking slowly. "You were asleep."
"Yes, I know. It's what people do at night." He rubbed his face, trying to make sense of the situation, and maybe trying to talk some sense into you. "Why are you always just... standing there? Watching me like a damn freak?"
You tilted your head slightly, as though considering your words. "You looked peaceful."
Dean froze, caught between a sense of confusion and sheer disbelief. "You woke me up because I looked peaceful?"
"No," you corrected, your voice as calm as ever. "You woke up on your own. I was merely observing."
"Observing what, exactly?"
For brief moments, you hesitated. Your expression was hard to read, since you just kept staring at him, but that question seemed to have made you think.
"Humans are... fragile. They take on too much. They carry the weight of their sins even unconsciously. I was ensuring that you remained unharmed."
Dean stayed just like you for a few seconds; still and staring, blinking slowly as if the gears in his brain were being dusted off. He opened and closed his mouth like a fish, trying to find the words.
"So you were angelically babysitting me?" he said, confused. How was he supposed to take that? Sure, it was... Cute, in a way. His chest tightened fondly at the thought of how much you cared for him, even if you showed it in such a weird way.
But still, it was fucking terrifying to be jumpscared by two shiny eyes staring at his soul in the middle of the night.
"Yes." you said, matter-of-factly, a tiny smile gracing your face, which only made Dean feel his chest tighten even more.
"Listen, sweetheart– I don't mind you watching me sleep, okay? Even if you look like a freak, I don't mind, but you should try to kick that habit. It's not very... uh, how do I say it? Human." Dean tried to explain it as simply as possible, but it was hard when you were looking at him with those big eyes, all wide and paying as much attention as if he were an exotic animal. "You scared five lifetimes out of me standing in that corner like an extra in horror movie. I'm just saying, others might react worse than me."
You blinked and looked down at your hands. "I didn't intend to frighten you. I'm simply drawn to your existence." You said softly. "If you would rather, I may go."
Dean shouldn't feel bad, but he did. It was like scolding a puppy for chewing on a shoe. He knew you were getting used to the Earth and how humans coexisted with each other, it wasn't entirely your fault you were a social misfit.
"Stay if you want," Dean flopped back onto his pillow with a groan, covering his face with his upper arm. "But I'd recommend you try doing other things while Sam and I asleep, believe me, anything is better than watching two idiots snore." He yawned.
Dean peeked out from behind his arm to watch you move toward the door, though you threw one last glance over your shoulder.
You hesitate, moving your lips as if you want to say something else. Finally, you nod. "Very well. Sleep well, Dean." Your gaze lingered for a moment, soft and curious, before vanishing down the hallway.
As soon as you left, Dean exhaled noisily. "Angels," he muttered, covering his head with the blanket. "Fucking weirdos."
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a/n: hii hiii hello this is my first drabble, hope y’all like it :) i’m doing sam’s version soon cuz my boy deserves to be disturbed by the angel too
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certifiedsexed · 2 days ago
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Hello!
Can you explain what aromantic means?
I know asexuality is not being sexually attracted to other people, and that explanation is easy for me to like, comprehend, I guess? I know what sexual attraction is and what it feels like, so it's easy for me to understand.
So being aromantic would mean not being romantically attracted to other people, then? I think? But I'm not sure what exactly that means.
Whenever I think of "romantic" things I think about going on dates, holding hands, flirting, etc. and I guess I'm just not understanding how not being into those things is a sexuality?
Like, not wanting to go on a date or hold hands just sounds like a normal dislike or preference, the same way someone might not not want to watch horror movies or go skydiving.
Or am I totally misunderstanding what the "romantic" in aromantic means?
Hello!
Sure! Aromantic means someone who experiences low/varied romantic attraction to other people. It's not a "sexuality" in the same sense as homosexuality for example, but it's definitely a variation on romantic attraction, which is linked to general sexuality.
Romantic attraction is about being attracted to someone(s) in a romantic way [e.g. wanting to be in a romantic relationship with them, wanting to do things with them with a romantic intent, etc], not just about doing things people consider "romantic".
I think it can be harder to understand romantic attraction because romance doesn't have an obvious physical component or even an obvious social definition. Which makes it harder to explain what a lack of romantic attraction is.
But those things are regular preferences, you're right! But all sexualities are about normal dislikes and/or preferences. A girl dislikes dating boys, prefers dating other girls-that's a lesbian!
Someone isn't attracted to others sexually-that's an asexual! Someone is attracted to all genders, that's a bisexual! Someone isn't into people romantically-That's an aromantic.
I don't think you've exactly misunderstood. I think there's more to it than you've understood but I think you're on the right track, Anon.
I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions. <3
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genshingorlsrevengeance · 15 hours ago
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I need any girls of you choice with a reader who doesn't understand what the word fetish means and thinks it's another word for hobby or activity. Thus reader well say stuff like "Hey you wanna try out this new fetish with me."
(H:SR/GoV: NIKKE/Genshin Impact) Their S/O not knowing what "fetish" means
Honkai Star Rail: Bronya, Seele, Serval Goddess of Victory NIKKE: Anis Genshin Impact: Ayaka, Lisa, Eula, Xianyun
Quoth the Bae, of Hololive English Promise:
"What is a fetish? If you really think about it , the negative connotation of fetish just doesn't make logical sense don't you agree? I just think if you have your preferences you can have your own preferences and that's completely fine but like asking for someone's fetish just seems like you're prying into something but it shouldn't really feel that way? Also eyes and thighs"
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Bronya was in the middle of drinking tea and filling paperwork before hearing the question that made her heart stop for a few seconds.
(S/O) "Bronya, would you care to try this fetish of mine?"
(Bronya) "HRK?!-"
Her hands fumble with the cup, causing some of it to spill over in the ground as she violently rocks in her seat, coughing as her eyes widened.
S/O quickly rushed over to her, one hand on her back and shoving some important documents aside as Bronya attempted to stabilize herself.
(S/O) "Bronya, what's wrong?!"
Bronya's face quickly scrunches up with embarrassment, quickly turning red as her voice cracked.
(Bronya) "What kind of question is that S/O? How can you discuss that so openly?!"
(S/O) "I-Is it that weird to paint out in public?"
...What?
(Bronya) "Paint?-...S/O, when you say fetish, what do you?-"
(S/O) "As in hobby? I overheard some of the people from Wildfire say it before."
Bronya blinks a few times before sighing, both her hands slowly dragging down her face before shaking her head.
(Bronya) "Dear...that's...not what that word means..."
(S/O) "What does it mean then?"
Bronya inhaled, trying her best to keep her composure that was snapped in half like a twig before her eyes shifted to the floor, fingers twiddling.
(Bronya) "I-It means..." ahem "...A certain activity or object you like when you are...intimate..."
(S/O) "Inti-?"
In an instant, S/O understood before their face looked similar to Bronya, the couple standing still completely red.
(S/O) "Oh..."
She thanked the Gods above that there were no guards currently in her room right now, lest they get the very wrong idea.
...Not that she was opposed to trying some things out, but this was her main office! Hardly the time and place!
(Bronya) "...Pray tell, who exactly gave you the definition of this word?"
(S/O) "W-Well, it was-"
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Seele regrets saying the word fetish off handedly around S/O.
Forgetting that they came from the prim and proper SIlvermane Guard, they didn't know the meaning of such a vulgar word.
Or more accurately, they were a bunch of softies who couldn't bear to hear something so normal in the Underworld.
Regardless, S/O thought it meant something entirely different because Seele was not ready for the question:
(S/O) "Wanna join me in a fetish I've been wanting to try, Seele?"
(Seele) "Hm? Sure-...WHAT?"
Seele immediately spun around, heart racing as she eyed S/O up and down.
They were in the middle of the streets right now! She sincerely prayed that they weren't about to-
Was that a notebook and pencil they were holding?
(S/O) "Seele? Is something the matter?"
(Seele) "Yeah, somethings the matter! Just what the hell do you think that word means?!"
(S/O) "W-Well, I thought it meant activity, or-"
Well, S/O technically wasn't wrong.
(Seele) "Ugh, l-listen! Just...don't go saying that around in public! And just use the word 'hobby' like a normal person!"
(S/O) "So, what does it mean then?"
(Seele) "I'm NOT explaining that in public just...just wait till we get home, alright?!"
She spun around, mostly to make sure S/O didn't see her blushing.
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Serval was in the middle of strumming her guitar idly, trying to make sure that it was tuned correctly when S/O came through the door.
(Serval) "S/O! What's up?"
S/O smiled at Serval, closing the workshop door behind her and taking a seat beside the rockstar.
(S/O) "Hey! I hope you don't mind me asking a favor."
Serval tittered, waving a hand nonchalantly in response before going back to adjusting the tuning again.
(Serval) "Not at all. What can I help with?"
(S/O) "A new fetish I want to try-"
A comically loud and out of tune note echoed throughout the shop as Serval's finger stopped flicking mid-motion, her eyes almost bulging out her skull.
The noise startled S/O, but not nearly as much as they had startled her.
(Serval) "Run that by me again, S/O?"
(S/O) "Y-Y'know. A, um...fetish. I want to try this particular song with you-"
(Serval) "Okay, okay! Hold up a second!"
Putting down her guitar and brushing the bangs that had fallen onto her face, she grabbed both their shoulders while she felt her face heat up.
(Serval) "S/O, are you and I thinking of the same word right now?"
(S/O) "I'm just talking about wanting to try an instrument out?"
(Serval) "And...there's no innuendo here, right?"
(S/O) "Does...fetish not think what I think it means?"
Serval gave an exacerbated sigh, though she couldn't help the smile that was forming as well.
(Serval) "Hah, not in the slightest."
S/O was such an idiot.
And by god, Serval was glad S/O was her idiot.
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Anis spits out the soda she was drinking, not bothering to clean up as she spun around to S/O.
(Anis) "WOAH! W-When did you get so bold?!"
S/O was stunned by Anis's reaction, but she wasn't able to scan in any increase in heartrate.
Did they just get augmented to become extremely brave, or?-
(S/O) "I didn't think you'd get so worked up over model building, Anis."
...Okay, no they were just stupid.
Anis slumped back down on the couch, facepalming before cleaning up the soda that was covering the table.
(Anis) "S/O, fetish isn't some ol-timey word for hobby!...Well, for decent folk, anyway."
(S/O) "So what's it-"
(Anis) "Agh! L-Look, don't ask me!"
Her core quickly heating up, her fingers fidgeted as she did her best to look everywhere except at S/O.
(Anis) "Go ask Rapi or Ne-N-NO! DON'T ASK NEON! JUST...Just ask the Commander, or something!"
(S/O) "O-Okay? I didn't offend you or something, did I?"
(Anis) sigh "No, but...look it's something you don't ask in the middle of the lobby, okay? It means something pretty...dirty!"
(S/O) "Since when did you care about that kind of thing?"
(Anis) "WHEN MY BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND IS ASKING ME TO TRY A FETISH ON THEM, OKAY?!"
(Neon) "WOAH! You're doing what?!"
(Commander) "...Is this a bad time to come in?"
(Rapi) "Perhaps we should take a break and leave the outpost for a while, sir-"
(Anis) "N-NO! YOU'RE GETTING THE WRONG IDEA!"
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Ayaka gasped at S/O's question, a hand going over her chest before stammering out a response.
(Ayaka) "Huh?! S-S/O! W-We can't discuss something so...degenerate out in the open!"
(S/O) "W-Wine tasting?"
Now Ayaka let out a small squeak. She knows she's heard something to do with wine tasting in the bedroom.
(Ayaka) "S/O, please!"
(S/O) "Hang on a second, Ayaka! I don't think you're understanding what I mean!"
For once, Ayaka thinks she knows something that S/O didn't outside of her duties.
That being the true meaning of a word that she found much too dirty to use.
(Ayaka) "S/O, do you know what that word is?"
(S/O) "Hobbies, right?"
(Ayaka) "I'm...afraid not, love."
Looking around to make sure no one was around, she leaned over to S/O's ear before whispering the meaning.
Which doing so caused her to become just as red as S/O.
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Lisa honestly doesn't know if she's disappointed or amused by the fact S/O asked her to try a fetish without knowing what it really means.
Maybe a little bit of both, but it didn't fail to get her to laugh anyway, Lisa covering her mouth by balling up a gloved hand.
And their confusion, accompanied by that cute tilt of their head and slight pout, got her to laugh even more.
(Lisa) "Sorry, sorry! Not laughing at you, cutie."
(S/O) "So, what are you laughing about then?"
(Lisa) "Well...that particular choice of phrasing, really. You do know what that word means, right?"
(S/O) "What, fetish?"
(Lisa) "Mhm."
S/O crossed their arms before sighing.
(S/O) "I saw it in a book, though the sentence it was used in was pretty vague. I know it means something to do with an activity, from context clues anyway."
(Lisa) "That book must have been very flowery in its language if you could only pick that up from the context."
Before making a mental note to check out the book S/O was reading, Lisa puts one hand under her chin as her elbow rests on the table.
(Lisa) "Allow me to tell you the definition proper, S/O...Rather, I'll show you it."
Later that evening, S/O did know what the word meant, one sore body later.
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Eula goes bright red at the question, immediately raising an eyebrow at S/O.
(Eula) "Is this some kind of joke, S/O?!"
Seeing S/O only laugh in reaction confirmed her suspicions. They were teasing her!
(Eula) "Hmph! Trying to get a rise out of an elegant woman such as I will only earn you my vengeance, S/O!"
(S/O) "My apologies, miss Eula! I did not know that a mere painting could get you so flustered!"
So, it was that kind of painting? Eula had no idea S/O was so...perverted!
(Eula) "Any right person would be, if asked! If you desire a nude model, then-"
Immediately, she noticed how red they got.
(S/O) "W-Woah! Hang on, I meant a regular painting! Like of a smile, or something like that!"
Eula paused for a moment, then furrowing her brows again.
(Eula) "Did you not just ask me to try a fetish with you?"
(S/O) "As in, hobby? Isn't that just a fancy word for it?"
...Oh.
(Eula) "N-Not in any circle I know."
Well, Eula certainly didn't want to be the one to explain it.
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Xianyun is relatively unaffected by S/O's question as she adjusts her glasses.
She's rather thankful of S/O being so straightforward about the request, less trying to decipher or beat around the bush for her.
(Xianyun) "One is not opposed, S/O. What fetish would you like to attempt?"
(S/O) "Great! See, I really want to try swimming as fast as I can versus one of your inventions!"
(Xianyun) "...A competition against One's contraptions is enough to stimulate you?"
(S/O) "I imagine it would! If it's made by you, then it's going to give me a challenge!"
Xianyun is honestly touched, that something made by her would get S/O that excited.
Who is she to deny her lover such a request?"
(Xianyun) "One will oblige! Let us head towards the beaches and find a worthy space to try it out."
...
Later as she watched her contraption race against S/O to a nearby rock, gliding against the waters, she heard footsteps behind her.
(Lumine) "Cloud Retainer?"
(Xianyun) "Ah, you return! One is pleased to see you doing well. Though you come at a rather...intimate moment, I believe."
Paimon blinked into existence next to her companion, waving hello excitedly.
(Paimon) "Hiya!...What's S/O doing?"
(Xianyun) "They are indulging themselves in a fetish of theirs."
(Lumine) "HUH?"
(Paimon) "W-WOAH! Did Paimon hear that right?!"
(Xianyun) "One is certainly not to judge. In fact, One can appreciate their openness about the subject matter."
Lumine and Paimon did a double take at what S/O was doing, then back to Xianyun.
...Either she didn't know what it meant, or-
S/O returned to shore a moment later, still clothed in a wetsuit that Xianyun had created and waved hello to the Traveler and Paimon.
(S/O) "Oh, hey you two!"
(Paimon) "Uh...hi?"
(Lumine) "S/O, Xianyun just told us you were...involved in a fetish?"
(S/O) "Yeah! I wanted to see if she could make a machine that was faster than me at swimming!"
(Xianyun) "Are mortals not accustomed to speaking so openly about it to their lovers?"
(Paimon) "P-Paimon guesses? But...do you know what it means?"
(Xianyun) "Naturally. A sexual desire of the partner-"
(S/O) "WHAT?!"
(Xianyun) "...Oh. Well, that certainly explains why you were so calm about it-"
(Lumine) "...I should go-"
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narcjsistx · 3 days ago
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𝐔𝐍𝐄𝐗𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃 | kaiser x reader
— part six
plot: kaiser comforted you after a bad and slow breakup, but what will happen now considering what you two shared? is everything still unexpected or is there something you both simply have yet to realize?. fluff shit 'cause yeah!!
words: 2.8k (2821)
extra: it will probably become a multi part story, tell me if you're interested in a part seven!. really a little suggestive at the end but it's literally nothing, but I thought it was right to say it
𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ; take a look, trust me!. you can find the other parts of the story by searching in the section dedicated to bllk
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The bags fall to the floor almost immediately, dropped from your hands that can no longer hold them. Michael's eyes are fixed on you, and you struggle, even for a few seconds, to hold his gaze. You reflect in his cerulean eyes a subspecies of betrayal, or even hatred; in all the years that you have known him, he has never looked at you like this, and it scares you. You shake more than you should, you even feel difficulty breathing. If hell wants to take you, it's succeeding. You immediately regret even opening that drawer
The letter, clean and tidy, shines on the table: the white, shiny paper, now seems to have your finger prints on it, prints that should only have been Kaiser's when he wrote it. The air is heavy, and heavy is your sense of oppression now
"Micheal I can-" you say almost in a whisper, but you remain silent when you see him take the letter in his hand "Sit down" he says while his eyes now scan the writings he himself has written. You swallow nervously, and quickly do as he says, sitting parallel to him, in the chair in front of his
You watch him as he rereads the letter once, twice, five, ten times, always taking the same amount of time. He never dares to look up at you, not even when he takes a break between readings. After minutes that seem endless, the only sound that escapes his lips is a heavy sigh, perhaps held in for a long time; one hand places the letter back on the table, the other reaches the bridge of his nose, which he massages with his fingers. He's visibly shaken, and you don't blame him, you're still shaking after all these minutes too
"So..." he says after a moment, taking his time to perhaps choose the right words "You read everything" he says looking up a little
You feel the skin on your body almost not sticking to your bones anymore, a sensation that you haven't felt even in one of your worst arguments with Gabriel. Probably if it had happened to you some time ago you wouldn't have understood the reason for this feeling, but now after all you know how to explain it: you love Michael, you're worried that he doesn't want to see you anymore after this. You care about him, about his opinion, about everything he does, unlike Gabriel
If until now, or at least until a few months ago, Gabriel was the person you worried about most in the world, now that role is played by another person. And this person is Micheal Kaiser
You want to talk, make up an excuse, but you know it wouldn't make sense; right now everything is too obvious, there are no openings to escape to and honestly you don't even want to lie to Micheal. The words die in your mouth, making you stay silent and without a truth to say. You stay silent because you don't know how to explain everything, and Micheal seems to notice your difficulty, because it seems more attentive
"I really don't know what to say to you either, Y/n. I wouldn't have even in the worst case scenario imagined something like this" he says with a calmness that hides so much anger, which you can see in the way he holds back some words "I just wonder why you would want to read something like this, especially considering it was hidden. Haven't you asked yourself why it was hidden?" he asks, but it's a question you know you can't answer because he's right "I'm just wondering... what the fuck is wrong with you? I really need to know, because now you know everything about me, that I've loved you for too long, that I dreamed that you were my wife, but what do I know about you?" he asks smiling almost hysterically, probably because of anxiety
The weight of the situation seems to crush you as if you were a simple feather: it kills you, it leaves you suffering and with each passing second it seems to strangle you more and more. Kaiser looks at you, waiting for answers that you have but that you don't really know how to explain to him. You can't explain to him how much you, only after years of him being in love with you, understood that you loved him too. You can't explain to him how hard it is for you to see the hatred he feels for you now, which he absolutely has the right to feel, but which still hurts
You can't explain to him how much you now just want to tell him that you would like to resolve the situation by kissing him and starting over something that probably just needs communication between the two of you
"You had the courage to read all that but not answer me?" he asks, raising an eyebrow, and you look down, keeping your hands in fists in your lap "You think you can solve everything with your silence? No, fuck, you can't, because this is literally a violation of my privacy. Do you realize how much I feel like shit right now knowing that you know things that I've kept from you for years just so our relationship wouldn't go to hell?" he says, and his tone of voice rises a little "Do you really have the courage to say nothing after finding out I love you?" he says, but the last sentence sounds more like a whisper desperate than an exclamation of complete meaning
"Micheal, please" you say with a shaky voice, trying to get a little bit of his pity, but you hear him laughing in an almost amused way "Please? You beg me? And what am I supposed to do, beg you to forget everything I've written over the years on those pieces of paper? Are you seriously asking me to give you a break when you literally did everything yourself, sticking your nose into things that didn't concern you?" he says, but at the last sentence you feel something inside you stir "They didn't concern me? Are you kidding?" you ask looking up, and you notice surprise in his eyes when he sees you answer him "That's not what matters, you literally discovered things that you shouldn't have known even when you were dead" he says, and for the umpteenth time it seems unfair to you "You should have told me" you say with a sudden conviction, but one that you don't really feel. You're just trying to find a way to calm him down, but with strange methods
In your eyes, Micheal seems to be on the verge of breaking. Everything he has kept inside for years is threatening to come out and he himself is realizing it. Everything he kept in his Pandora's box is now coming out like a menacing monster
"What was I supposed to tell you? That every night since you've been with that man, I hoped he'd die so I could finally tell you the truth? That I wanted to see you smile so badly that I gave 101% in matchs knowing you were watching me? That I dreamed for years of the feeling of being able to call you my girlfriend without being afraid? That I spent days locked in the house when you said you were leaving for Italy and leaving me alone? That everything I did was to make you happy and make you see that it wasn't just normal affection?
That I kissed other girls hoping it was your lips and not theirs? That I dreamed a million times of a future where you were my wife? That I always had a bottle of your perfume that I carried with me when I was out of town? That there's a picture of you and me as teenagers in my wallet?
That I lost weight when I found out Gabriel was taking you away from me? That Ness himself always thought me that you didn't feel the same way about me? That every time I saw you walk by I dreamed of you running to hug me?
That I dreamed of another universe where I could really be happy with you, where we were together, we could kiss and hug each other, we were husband and wife, we even had children, where everything was really perfect at least in my eyes?
That you were the only one I cried for? That you are the only person who knew what I went through with that asshole of a father of mine? That the feeling of even hearing your name made me happy? That seeing you after months of separation was like a liberation? That loving you for me was the only great joy my life has given me? That for me you are always be everything?
That ever since I found out that you and Gabriel fought often I was happy? That every time you told me about your arguments I hoped you would break up? That I hoped that the last fight was really the last? That running to you in Italy after your breakup was the moment I looked forward to more than when I have to score a goal? That feeling your arms around my neck while you hugged me after so long made me feel alive? That the sensation of finally having your lips on mine was like entering heaven? That letting you love me that night was like I had never really experienced anything, because there was no comparison in having sex with you?
How could I tell you all this, Y/n, knowing that it wasn't reciprocated? That by doing so I would be pushing away the only person whose thoughts about me I truly care about?"
The tremor you were feeling until now seems to disappear, replaced now by a feeling of liberation that perhaps Kaiser is feeling now too. The weight that was crushing you to death lifts as all his thoughts come to the surface, thoughts so intimate that not even letters could have
Kaiser has unconsciously risen from his chair, his arms stretched out against the table. He is breathing heavily, and it seems only now that he realizes what he has actually said, that the monster he kept in his Pandora's box has come out and destroyed the entire village. It seems as if what he has wanted to say for years has come out now, but he had not kept in mind the consequences of his words. For the first time, he seems like the least alien stranger you've ever met: you didn't know his feelings, but now his words have weight of no small importance
The real Micheal Kaiser, after years, is finally before your eyes, alive as only a human can be, dressed with a level of intimacy that probably few people can reach. Micheal Kaiser has finally shown who he is to the person he has always loved with an almost impossible level
"Micheal, I-!" you say, getting up from your chair too, but something inside you seems to block you from moving. It's time, now or never. You don't even know for sure if he still feels everything he just said, if he really is still in love with you that much, but now it's your turn to lay yourself bare. You love him, you know you do it for years, you know that everything you had with Gabriel was just something you were looking for from Micheal
"Micheal, listen to me, I-" you say trying to find the words, but everything inside you dies the moment he lowers his gaze "Forget everything"
And suddenly, all the weight that was gone comes back stronger than before, not even giving you time to realize. The belief you had until a few seconds ago suddenly seems to be a nonsense that you were about to reveal. Michael breathes loudly, with a calmness that doesn't belong to the situation. You watch him as he stands up straight, no longer with his arms stretched out against the table. It seems as if he has just realized the consequences of his words and that everything he said came out only because it had to come out, not because it had to reach your heart; freeing oneself, not acting for something. And it's exactly that "Forget everything" that comes out of his lips that makes you the angry one in this situation this time. It annoys you that now he is you, the person who would like to escape, that just at the moment when you were about to be the one naked in front of his eyes, he decided to close them
A last sigh escapes his lips before he silently makes his way out of the room, towards the door behind you. He is running away, running away from something that this time he has caused: there is a strange connection in your own situation, as if you were both two identical, yet different, sides of the same coin. In a lightning-fast move you place yourself between him and the door, your arms open and resting against the adjacent walls. Your heart is beating too fast, you don't even know what you're really doing, but it seems right in a corner of your soul. Kaiser looks up, staring at you with a hint of annoyance that actually covers something else
In a few days you went from best friends, to lovers unaware of each other, to strangers, to rival for annoyance and now? What are you two now?
Neither of you dares to utter a word, but your eyes seem to communicate with a language that your minds struggle to understand. It is something fine, that can easily break, but that is saying everything that you have hidden from yourself for years. It's a language that only two people who have done everything to hide their feelings so as not to hurt each other can understand with inhuman ease
“Say it” you say confidently, knowing that what you think is finally coming “Say it, because I know you think it. And I think it, too, Michael.”
You would have, or rather, you should have been honest with each other so many years ago. His tense nerves finally seem to melt away when he hears your words, now light as a feather
"I love you" he says, in a way that seems to carry with it many sleepless nights, lost because of thoughts. Finally, both you and him, have taken off the last crumb of weight that you were carrying; you smile almost unconsciously, bringing your hands between his jaw and his cheeks "I love you too, Michael"
It is in that moment that the knot you were holding tight in your stomach goes away, it is in the same moment that everything seems to take on a new shade. It is in that precise moment, where Kaiser throws himself violently on your lips, that shivers of love run through your whole body
The sensation he longed for is finally here, as he kisses you with an almost aggressive tenderness. You kiss each other back, feeling for the first time the real butterflies everyone talks about. It's a needy kiss, that perhaps he waited too long and that is taking everything now; but it's beautiful, loved, and you wonder how you and him could have waited so long if you knew the outcome was something like this, so exciting and inexplicable
His hands move to your hips, squeezing them lightly with a firm grip, as if he wants to make sure you're there. The kiss doesn't seem to end, as you hold each other, your body smeared against his and vice versa. There's something that maybe you're both still holding back but that's slowly coming out of you. Everything becomes more needy, just like that night in the hotel: the kiss becomes more aggressive, his hands tighter, your hands sweatier as you slide them along his neck, tracing the outline of his tattoo. You feel him tremble, as he moves his lips to your neck, letting soft sighs escape your lips, while suddenly everything seems to take a turn that you've both already experienced a few weeks ago
You don't know how, a few minutes later, you found yourself in his room, lying on his mattress with him on top of you, still aggressive on your neck. But you liked him so much that your legs were shaking for the emotion
You loved Michael Kaiser. Michael Kaiser loved you. You loved each other, and it took you years to realize what you could have experienced already at 19 years old. But now, at this moment, in his room, you loved each other
And that's what mattered to you
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tag(s): @rroxii ; @kittenish0 (if you want to be tagged tell me!)
READ IS IMPORTANT!!: the story seems finished but NO, let's say we are only halfway through what I have in mind. thank you so much for all the support I'm receiving, I think I don't deserve it actually 🥹 love y'all 💗🌷
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sillylotrpolls · 24 hours ago
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About Reblog Graphs
Have you ever clicked on the "reblog graph" button of a post? I think they're one of the... well, maybe not greatest features on tumblr ever (polls are probably better), but they're still pretty darn neat.
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I want to show some cool patterns I noticed on some recent posts of mine, but first I'll explain how reblog graphs work so you can more easily follow along.
This is pretty long with a bunch of pictures, so click the cut to read more.
How reblog graphs work
If you've never done so before, I invite you to click the notes button on this or any other post and then the icon with four circles. You will then see a bunch of dots connected by lines.
For example, if you click the graph for the "blorbo in Elvish" post, you get something like this:
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Now, let's zoom in a bit. You can do this by using the mouse wheel and clicking and dragging around the graph until it's showing what you want. (I don't know how it works on mobile, but presumably it's similar to using Google maps?)
This next screenshot is the bit in the lower right of the graph shown above. However, the graph may not always display in the same way because reblog graphs are re-generated each time you click the "reblog graph" button.
Here you can see that I'm viewing the root post, which is the original post made by me. It's indicated by a circle with a dot inside. You can also see that six people reblogged that post. Each reblog shows as a dot with a line connecting it to the post it was reblogged from.
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Now here's a cool thing about reblog graphs: they're interactive! You can click on any dot and see the post it represents and the reblog chain that led to it.
For example, clicking this dot that has several lines emanating out from it shows that it is "2 reblogs deep" and was posted by @cycas.
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Got it? Close enough? Cool, now let me show you some neat things I noticed. :D
The Swedish Chef poll and very popular bloggers
My polls tend to average between 500 and 2000 votes, depending on subject matter. The Swedish Chef poll, however, took off and eventually garnered over 22,000 votes. How did that happen? A very popular blog reblogged it about five days in.
Initially, the graph looked like this. (This is the first 200 reblogs.) There's nothing unusual here. You can see that the root post had several reblogs, and that there's another cluster developing around a post by @zagreus. There are also several reblog chains where just one person reblogs someone else's reblog. Some of these chains peter out, while others find their way onto the dash of more popular bloggers, creating clusters.
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A quick note about "popularity"
Yes, yes, it's all about "popular." However, it's not just about having a bunch of followers. What's more important is that the "popular" person reblogging your post has followers who are specifically interested in your post.
For instance, if I, @sillylotrpolls, make a poll about LazyTown, it's probably not going to get very many reblogs because my followers aren't here for that. However, if @silly-lazytown-polls reblogs the poll, that reblog might then get quite a lot of reblogs itself. It's not that silly-lazytown-polls has more followers than sillylotrpolls, it's that it has more followers specifically interested in LazyTown content. Make sense?
Back to the Swedish Chef poll
The poll eventually got over 5,000 reblogs. Since you can only add 200 reblogs to the graph at a time, you can roughly see how a post spread over time.
With 600 reblogs loaded, a new cluster bursts onto the scene. This is @bunjywunjy, who reblogged the post from @beecreeper who reblogged it from @soggypotatoes who reblogged the original.
Bunjywunjy didn't add any tags or comments, so I didn't even notice at first because it didn't show in my activity feed. However, I did notice a sudden uptick in notes on the post, which caused me to investigate. It had been five days since I posted the poll, and usually polls that are going to take off do so sooner than that.
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By continuing to click the "load more reblogs" button I can see how the post further spread, especially from bunjywunjy's post.
When the post reached @beggars-opera (whose icon I am somewhat proud to announce I identified on sight), they added a screenshot of @stylishanachronism 's tags which said:
# all of these are incorrect it's the 'meat's back on the menu boys!' scene
This would become the dominant version of the post as it further spread. Interestingly, this was the only reblog of stylishanachronism's reblog. Literally thousands of people loved their tags and agreed with them, but they quite plausibly never saw it unless they specifically went looking.
By 3,200 reblogs, you can see even bigger clusters developing. @thebibliosphere shows up 10 reblogs deep, and leads to yet another cluster via @teaboot (12 reblogs deep).
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Eventually, with all 5,371 reblogs loaded, the reblog graph looks like this:
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Like I said: neat. :D
Cool, but if you've seen one, you've seen them all - right?
So what prompted this (extremely long) post was actually the reblog graph for my poll on inspirational LotR quotes.
Here's the reblog graph with 200 reblogs loaded:
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And here's the graph with all 1,890 reblogs loaded:
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It's just one big cluster around the root post. I've never seen that before!! Almost everyone reblogging this post saw it either because they follow this blog, saw it in the #lotr tags, or because their non-influencer friend reblogged it. (Or maybe it was in some kind of algorithm/the explore feed, but I have nearly zero experience with those.)
And this wasn't just a small post. This poll got over 15,000 votes and more than 4,000 notes. That puts it in the top 10 polls for this blog.
What does it mean? I have no idea. I would really like to know! But really, I got nothing. If you have a theory for why this particular poll should result in a reblog graph like this, I would very much like to hear it.
Orphan clusters
To round things off, I'd like to show another interesting facet of reblog graphs: orphan clusters.
This blog's current undisputed poll champion is the fmk wheel poll. That's not really a surprise, as it combined sex with a fun game where you just had to tell everyone what you got, which meant either a reply or a reblog. So it spread pretty far.
However, if you look at the graph, there's something odd going on.
This is with just 200 reblogs loaded:
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Notice how some of the dots don't connect to the root post? That's because somewhere along the chain, a reblog was deleted.
This cluster in the bottom left got pretty big! This screenshot is at 800 reblogs loaded. The missing link is from a blog called @gendertaliban that doesn't exist anymore, as near as I can tell. That makes it impossible to trace the full path of any of these reblogs.
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In conclusion
This concludes today's deep dive into a tumblr feature you probably never paid any attention to. Admittedly, there's not a huge use for it outside of determining which of your mutuals is an "influencer," and they get quite difficult to navigate after loading about 1000 reblogs, but I hope you enjoyed staring at dots and lines with me. :)
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taniahylian · 19 hours ago
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Sonetto was reversed by the storm
Okay, I know it sounds crazy like most of my theories tbh, but hear me out, cuz there's a lot of evidence for this one. And I do mean A LOT, especially since they changed the dialogue of the Prologue to be better translated, although I suspected it even before I checked out the new version.
So, first of all, let's talk teleport floppy discs.
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The new dialogue emphasizes that the one Regulus steals was the last one Sonetto and her team had with them. You could deduce it before, with the old dialogue, but it wasn't as obvious as this. One of the investigators even tells Sonetto that they'll have to go back on foot, after Regulus steals it.
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Now, this particular piece of dialogue is weird because we all know that being caught up in the Storm actually means you get reversed, but I assume the female investigator here meant that, if someone catches the Storm Syndrome, they're descualified as an investigator, which makes sense, since we also know the symptoms get stronger and stronger the closer we're to the actual Storm.
Still, the point is that it's urgent that they go back, and Sonetto even agrees, sending her team back to headquarters at this point. However, she stays to search for Regulus.
But, after Regulus escapes a second time (thanks to Vertin in this case), Sonetto still insists that she'll go find her, at which point Vertin actually seems quite worried about her.
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She also emphasizes that if Sonetto doesn't go back now, it'll be too late. Still, Sonetto recklessly continues searching, and by the time she finally accepts that she has to go back to headquarters and abandon the mission, only ten minutes are left... although in-game it actually seems more like 10 seconds. But, even if it actually was ten minutes, that hardly seems enough time to get out of London and to wherever the Foundation is, especially considering that all employees returning from the Storm have to wait in line to get in, and many don't make it.
It's at this point that Sonetto runs off and we don't see her again until we summon her at the spinning wheel (and I'll get to that in a moment), but I'd like to point out to a scene in a trailer that was never released in their official global channel. We see the storm of 1966, which we can recognize for the cartoon patterns everywhere, as well as the café Regulus was hiding at, and caught in this storm we see... Sonetto, getting reversed.
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But I hear you, Sonetto can't be reversed, right? She's still here, in the suitcase! Yes, but... How exactly did she get into the suitcase?That's right; through the spinning wheel, which has... some interesting connections to the storm.
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So, the "lake" is actually made of rainwater from the storm, not normal water. Not only that, but now we know that it has that weird hallucinogenic fog that makes people fall asleep (except Vertin) and grants immunity to the Storm, just like the Aperion cave. And that's not even the only evidence here.
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When you summon someone, you can see as the drops of water begin to rise from the lake, just like when the Storm happens. My theory here is that the spinning wheel isnt't able to summon anyone, but only people who were reversed by the Storm and that Vertin knew personally. Why do I say that? Because when she summons Sonetto, the game describes it as the line "forming a path on her mind", and I bet at that point in time Vertin was actually worrying about wether Sonetto had made it to safety or not, which is why she was the one summoned.
Also, let's remember that, although the wheel is part of the gatcha mechanic, Sonetto is, canonically, the only character we know for certain that has been obtained by this method. In most other cases, the game actually goes out of its way to explain how they joined Vertin and/or the Foundation (the exception being those we don't know about yet).
Also, if this is indeed the case; if the spinning wheel actually brought Sonetto back from being reversed... it did much more than that. It rewrote history so that Sonetto was never reversed. Why do I say that? Because Sonetto already had the mission capsule with her, which she had supposedly obtained in the Chicago office, and had also spoken to Madam Z and the commitee and been informed of her new post as the Timekeeper's assistant... all of this in less than half an hour? And right after the Storm too?
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Doesn't seem possible, does it? Especially since the headquarters, where Sonetto was headed before the Storm, are in Europe, while the Chicago office is, well, in Chicago. To me, it's a lot more plausible that the wheel rewrote history so that, in Sonetto's memory at least, all of this happened in the past 24 hours instead of the mission to register Regulus in. Although she still remembered Regulus because it's implied that Sonetto and her team had been following her for a while.
Anyways, what do you think? Too crazy? XD
Someday I'll write my theories from the inside of the Laplace Rehabilitaion Center, I swear lol.
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coquexari · 2 days ago
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Is it alright if you talk/ramble about your god designs?? :3 I’d love to learn about your thought process about them!!! :D
HI, YES, WILL DO :D!!! Okay, so, fun little thing, athena wont be here because I WILL be redesigning her, but not too much, just to basically match with Zeus a little more [favorite child moment.] For the most part, I basically try to put the branches that stem from the concepts of what they're a god of, like god of thunder and god of the seas, with both Zeus and Poseidon having elements of their environment. With Zeus' cloud hair and fluff, and his thunder like marbling on his skin, and Poseidon's water arms and fish features [the fins and black scales] Zeus' design wasnt as simple to think about as I thought, for the most part I kind of just dont put that much thought into it and think about it AS I go, I try to implement the leaves in other ways like his horns, and the MAIN thought in designing zeus is how much of a drama queen that he was that he'd want to make himself look more different than everyone else, my thoughts are pretty scrambled because i don't exactly know how to explain my thoughts in a linear pattern so im sorry if it cant be understood, basically just had idea after idea WHILE i was making him, his hair basically turns into his tail in the same design that Hermes has, just fluffier, AND his chest is charred/marbled with lightning coming from the center because power is where his heart lies. I wanted him to EMBODY, cockiness, king of gods energy, while also thinking it'd be funny that other than aphrodite he's the one with the most skin shown..just because. Poseidon's design was in similar existence with Zeus, but where Zeus was as big and puffy as his clouds, I wanted poseidon to be as sleek as water, his hair had to be waves that melded into the seas whenever he was in his element, and when he wasnt, his hair would flow to the floor giving the look you usually see in water breathing from demon slayer [image below] His hair flows in the same sense, while keeping its form for the most part.
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Hermes! well, he kinda just came to me while I was doodling him, ngl I had to pull out google to figure out what hermes looked like the first time to get more than one idea, and decided that it'd be fun to make him more of a mysterious trickster of a mailman that is alot more threatening than he's let on, giving him a more 'biblically accurate angel' look with all the eyes came from the idea of him being a messenger and being able to go anywhere as quickly as he does, you'd never really know when he was or wasn't watching. I thought I'd just implement that more into his design, ALSO incorporate some spirity ghostly things mostly on his cape, just to make his role of guiding souls a bit more shown :3 APHRODITEEE Was simple, but a really fun thought, as the goddess of beauty and allat I wanted her to basically be as customizable as possible, marbling vitiligo with white hair, a canvas capable of change. She's able to mold herself as whoever you want her to be, and whoever she wants herself to be, but her main look is a dull pink with marbling vitiligo and hair so white you'd get blinded looking at her, I also added a bit to the dove look with her hair, making it look and flow like feathers whenever she moves.
Basically, again, all of my ideas usually stem from the concepts and branches of their titles, and my want to just make them all silly and pretty, i havent designed others yet but I hope this answers it! :D!
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yellowhollyhock · 3 days ago
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you know the hardest thing about 07 fanfic is getting around the gaping plot hole of 'your training ended a year ago and Master Splinter says you've stopped writing'
Like? What am I supposed to believe here? That Leo's gone for an extra year (twice as long as he's supposed to be gone), nobody goes looking for him, he stops writing, and nobody's reaction is 'Leo is either in serious danger or dead?' Everybody assumes he just decided not to come home?? And they're right???? Like we don't see much of Leo's personality but from what we do see, a year is a long time to just not write and not let anyone know he was gonna be late
That just doesn't. Make any sense.
So here's me trying to make sense of it
When Leo first left, Raph became the Nightwatcher (as per prequel comics). Mikey starts his Cowabunga Carl thing, with Donnie's help, and enjoys it a lot for a while. It's the only time he's getting out after all. Other than training, which is not going well without Leo. Donnie's not a very firm leader, barely wants to be doing it himself. Raph is checked out and short-fused. Master Splinter tries to intervene but that largely looks like scolding and isn't much help at all.
Mikey knows Raph is the Nightwatcher. In the beginning Donnie thought he must not be, because of an instance here or there where he was too harsh, too reckless, couldn't be their brother, he would never do that. Mikey responded by pointing out the good things and arguing over the debatable things and reminding Donnie of the trouble Raph can get himself into when he's fixed on a goal or acts from a place of anger. Donnie sees the schedules continue to line up and has to concede, but that leads to the question: what is Raph so angry about? And while they haven't come up with an answer, privately Donnie assumes it's at him (for not being the kind of leader Leo was).
Four months after Leo leaves, they're still training every morning and going out occasionally. Six months in, they still train most days. Master Splinter has asked them not to go out together because of how they treat each other during training. Mikey likes his job less and also clings to it more as it becomes the only way he's ever getting out. By the time Leo should be home in a month, while each of them still practice, training together is rare.
That's when they get a letter from Leo that he might be late, and isn't sure how late.
So he's a week late. Donnie is researching every boat and airplane that left from Japan (last known general location) trying to guess what's likely to have caused the delay and extrapolate where Leo might currently be.
Two weeks late. Mikey is planning such a big homecoming party that increases in intensity with every night Leo's not there. It might be tonight, we have to be ready. He's not taking gigs and Donnie's getting stressed about money.
Raph is being the Nightwatcher and only sees his brothers for a brief time in the evenings--and lately those evening have been all about Leo. He's watching them both worry themselves sick. He'd actually allowed himself to be excited for Leo to come home, imagined they could have a good time together if he had a chance to pull him aside and talk to him about the thing he hasn't talked to anyone about: Merryweather's death. It's his big brother he wants to tell and he can't explain the Nightwatcher to his family until he's had that conversation with Leo. They fought about it before Leo left and he needs him to understand.
But now he's getting angry. Where is he? Donnie expresses concern that Something Happened; Master Splinter insists they must stay calm and not give up hope.
Three weeks late. Donnie is now insisting Mikey get focused back on work. At this point Donnie is still being Mikey's driver, in the headset and on standby every time Mikey goes out. Mikey wants him to back off (I can do this myself) so that at least someone will be home to greet Leo since Mikey might not be (your fault for making me go to work). Donnie is really hurt by the implied 'don't need you anymore' and feels guilty (which somebody really should) that Mikey's the breadwinner for the whole family. Even more guilty now that he thinks his help was more for his pride than because Mikey ever needed him.
Then a letter from Leo. Sorry for not contacting you sooner, I'm safe and well, hope I didn't worry you. I'll be at least another month. Much shorter than his letters used to be; they're more worried than ever. And this time the return address is way off course from what they thought was his path home. What's going on?
Mikey wants to write to him. Everyone else points out they don't know where to send the letters. Donnie is back to obsessing over maps, train schedules, weather patterns, anything that might hint at an explanation. Between their jobs and worrying about Leo, Raph doesn't understand how either of his brothers can still stand upright.
He becomes more aggressive out in the streets. He's worried and confused and pretty steamed at Leo for giving them nothing to go by. And even more angry at who or what could have hurt him badly enough that he doesn't want to tell his family what's going on. He's quicker to hit and more hasty to decide who the bad guy is.
Donnie and Mikey see the change. Donnie starts openly criticizing the Nightwatcher every chance he gets (trying to get Raph to fess up or better yet stay home or at the very least see that he's going too far sometimes and needs to take a break). Mikey responds by doubling down on his defense and praise for the Nightwatcher (also wants Raph to confess and knows he won't when Don's talking like that, wildly hoping to be invited along, wanting to keep Raph safe but also eager himself to have a space to let out his own building anger).
And what's Mikey angry at? The fact that Master Splinter hasn't done anything. He's satisfied with Leo's explanation. Doesn't seem concerned, like Raph and Donnie are, that something went wrong. Master Splinter replies that the Ninja Tribunal is wise and at times unpredictable. They may have thought it right to extend Leonardo's training. Donnie points out that the return address for Leo's recent letters are not in Japan; did the Tribunal travel with him? Master Splinter doesn't have an answer and still insists on remaining calm and hopeful.
Now it's been two months, one week past the second time Leo was supposed to be home. Mikey plans a party again, this time with much less support from his frazzled, sleep-deprived brothers who are trying not to get their hopes up. Raph tries to keep Mikey from getting his hopes up either. That doesn't go over well.
After three months, they get another letter, another apology with no explanation, this time saying he has no idea when he'll come home, but don't worry, he's coming.
Raph has been seeing night after night what the world can be like. He's convinced something unspeakable happened or will happen to Leo, but he can't tell anyone that. He wants to go after him, but how is he supposed to find him? The best he can do for Leo is the same he did for Merryweather: be the hero they can't be anymore. Make people who are careless with others' lives Pay. And somehow he has to keep it from his family that he thinks Leo's gone gone, or might be soon; they couldn't take it. They don't know the world like he does. He can protect them from this, for a while.
Donnie thinks Leo must need help, and that's driving him crazy because he doesn't know how to reach him. But he's going to find a way. He starts planning and saving up for parts to build his mutant finding matrix thingy. After their argument he doesn't want to ask for Mikey's help paying, and it wouldn't be right since he's been really trying to let him be more independent. He finds a job. Mikey seems bothered, they talk and work out a better working relationship that allows Mikey more independence and pays each of them separately (Mikey of course making more because he's doing more). Now with the call line job supplementing that he's able to ease the burden on Mikey and April of providing for the family (he knows Casey's been worried about the kind of work April's been taking) and he can buy the parts he needs to find Leo, go after him and bring him home. He's going to fix this for everybody.
Six months after the first time Leo was supposed to come home, Mikey finally gives up hope. He's been secretly sending letters to different places he thinks Leo might be. He stops. He's hidden nightmares about what could happen to Leo for months. He stops asking for Raph or Donnie to go skateboarding with him, stops insisting on family nights every Saturday. He gets closer to Splinter, who he's seen a change in and knows, in spite of continued insistence to stay calm and not give up hope, Master Splinter gave up a while ago. Donnie says he's just getting old (he's been very worried about his health and is becoming more micromanager about it every day), but Mikey knows it's more than that. He sees the depression Splinter is hiding. Splinter doesn't notice the same in him.
Around that time, they finally get one more letter. Leo says that he's not going to be in a place where he can get paper or postage, so they also won't be hearing from him. He doesn't say anything about coming home.
Raph had thought Leo was dead; the letter makes him furious (he's been mourning in secret for nothing? Is Leo even in trouble or just decided not to come back?). Donnie is thrilled by it; not being able to send a letter actually might help him narrow down where Leo is, and they have a more recent return address now. He's about ready to pack up and go get him, something he assumes Raph will be on board with.
Well, Raph can't leave, and he can't tell his family why (they know why). He and Donnie have a screaming match. Raph wants to know how this return address is any different from the letters before, and why they didn't go then. Donnie brings up Raph not seeing Leo off at the airport when he first left. Raph asks if Donnie's even been training. Mikey suspects it got physical, but if it did they both hide the bruises well and they're not saying a thing.
Raph starts going straight to his room when he gets back in the early morning, and staying in his room until he can hear that the rest of them have gone to bed. Once in a while he'll come out to argue if he overhears something that sets him off.
Mikey would go with Donnie to get Leo, but Donnie says Raph's right, he'll have moved on by the time they get there, it's the same as every other return address. He just needs more time to figure out where Leo actually is.
Mikey is starting to think they've run out of time, but just like Raph, he doesn't want to say that.
Batnapping happens like eight months in. Master Splinter is deeply bothered by it, gets stricter, asks his sons not to go out until Leo gets home. Raph has to get sneakier. Mikey had to negotiate to keep his job (Donnie helps). At this point Donnie is the only one who almost never leaves the sewers; April tries to get him to her place as often as possible, usually finding that asking for help is most effective.
And that's how they all live for fourish months before Leo finally (unexpectedly) returns.
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darlingshane · 2 days ago
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new chapter
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Joe Teague x F!Reader
Summary: On his wedding night, before he gets to spend some time alone with you, Joe listens to the conversation you're having with your daughter as you tuck her in. The little girl has some interesting questions regarding him and his new role in her life that you're happy to answer to put her at ease.
CW: +18, explicit, smut, oral sex (f. recieving), p in v sex, fluff, wedding night, pregnancy, dancing, established relationship, mention of past abuse, mention of divorce, set in the late 40s.
Word Count: 2,3k
— Links: AO3 // Joe Masterlist
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Joe takes one final look around the first floor to make sure all doors and windows are locked before heading upstairs. The kitchen is a cluttered mess of dirty dishes piling in the sink from the casual reception you hosted right at the brand-new house. Dishes can wait till tomorrow. It's been a big day worthy of celebration and while it's sad to see it come to an end, he can't wait to see what this new chapter in his life with you brings him.
He's excited to see what the future holds, what these walls would tell ten or twenty years from now. This is where he's putting his roots, and he's betting everything on it that there won't be no bail this time. You are it for him. There's no doubt in his heart.
Though it’s neither his nor your first marriage, it feels just like it. The experience is completely different, given that both of you come with your own baggage; and kids in your case from your first marriage. You chose to have a simple ceremony at the courthouse, followed by a small reception at the house, and it couldn't have gone better. He can't get over how beautiful everything was. He knew you were special from the moment he met you, but the sense of pride and love he's felt today comes second to none. Not only did you look stunning in the custom dress you made yourself, but the way you've handled every little detail is something to admire.
He still has part of his uniform on when he steps into the hallway of the second floor to see you tuck Grace, your six-year-old, into bed. He leans on the door frame, listening to your voices through the cracked door.
“Mama, you look like a princess today,” she says as you pull the sheet over her body, folding it carefully at the hem as the little girl gets comfortable on her pillow. Just like Joe, you're still wearing your wedding dress with no shoes on.
“Thanks, baby. Did you have fun today?”
“Yeah, I wish you’d marry every day.”
“Every day? That’d be a lot of work with that many husbands.” She breaks into laughter along with you. “What was your favorite part?”
“The cake.”
“It was a great cake.” You agree, pushing a strand of hair off her face.
“Will you make me a dress like yours for my wedding day?”
“Sure, but first I need to know who you're marrying.”
“Hm, I don't know yet.” The little girl shrugs, holding a stuffed teddy bear in her embrace. “Someone like Joe, I guess.”
“Yeah? You like Joe?”
“He's pretty funny.”
“Pretty funny looking, I'd say.” Joe watches you glance over your shoulder, smiling at him.
“Is he my dad now? Should I call him daddy?”
“Only if you want to.” You sweetly caress her face. “Do you want Joe to be your daddy?”
She nods. “What if he doesn't want to? Is he going to be mean to us like my other daddy was?”
It breaks your heart hearing her express it like that at such a short age. As much as you tried to protect her, she was still aware of how awful her father was to you both. You thought she had forgotten about him after he died a few years ago, cause she was still a toddler. It was hard to explain to her that he didn't come back from war, but somehow your little girl understood that your lives turned for the better the moment he was gone. And surprisingly, she’s never mentioned him until now.
“Baby, I promise you, Joe is a good man. He’d never hurt us like that. We wouldn’t be here otherwise. You might see us sometimes argue, but I give you my word that no matter what, Joe loves us more than your daddy ever did. He’s going to take care of us, and we’re going to take care of him, okay? We’re family now. It doesn’t matter if you call him daddy or not, he’s gonna love you the same.”
Grace hugs her teddy bear tight as you watch her pondering for a moment in silence.
“Do you wanna ask him or do you want me to do it?”
“You do it.” She sticks out her finger and boops your nose.
“Alright, I'll do it.” You turn your head again to nod at Joe, beckoning him to come closer.
He steps into the room and bends down by the bed, propping a knee on the floor and holding his forearm on your lap.
“Hey, Gracie Jo.”
“Hi,” she says shyly, even though she's usually pretty chatty around him. But this is a big ask, you're aware, and a big step for all of you. “Mommy wants to ask you something.”
“Oh?” he gazes at you with a smile on his face, very aware of what you’re going to ask. It’s something you’ve talked about before, but you didn’t want to force Grace into accepting Joe as her father before she was ready.
“Gracie and I were wondering if you’d like to be her daddy.”
He fondly looks at you and then turns to her to assure her there's nothing he'd love more.
“It'd be an honor to be your dad, sweetheart,” he promises, placing a kiss on her forehead.
It melts your heart to see them both beaming in delight. You have no doubts that Joe would be up for the task to fill that role in her life better than anyone. You and Grace would've been fine with or without him in your life, but you're glad you got the opportunity to meet him and fall in love with him like this.
You curl up with Grace until she falls asleep and then retire to your new room.
You've got the house for a week now, but with all the arrangements for the wedding and the hassle of moving, you haven't had a minute to stop to look at it as your new home until now. There's still work to do, but you're proud of what you've accomplished to make it feel safe and comfortable for your daughter. That's all you needed. You're exhausted, but it was all worth it at the end. Hopefully, you'll be able to slow down in the next few days while everything settles.
When you step out of Grace’s room, you leave the door slightly ajar. Next to it, by the staircase there's your workspace, and a bathroom on the other side. There’s an empty bedroom in front of hers that would soon be filled with baby furniture for the little guy growing in your belly. You haven't told Grace yet, she would have babbled to everyone at the party that she was having a baby brother or sister, which is something she's been asking for years. In a couple of days, you and Joe will tell her and you know already she'll be over the moon.
At the end of the hallway is yours and Joe's bedroom. There's only a light coming from a night lamp when you go inside. There's music playing on the radio while he waits for you, sitting on the chair by the window. He still looks as handsome as this morning, when you first saw him fully dressed in his uniform. Now, his shirt is half unbuttoned, his pants are creased, and the shoes are off.
“Thought you’d be in bed by now, Mr. Teague,” you say as he stands up to meet you in the middle.
“I was waiting for you, Mrs. Teague.” He picks up your hand and brings it up to his lips to print a kiss on your knuckles. “I didn’t get a chance to dance with my bride today, I was hoping we could do it now. Would you like that, sweetheart?”
“I’d love that.” Your lips form a smile as he spins you around in the middle of the room before securing an arm around your waist.
You place your palms on his chest, smoothing the fabric of his shirt across the breadth of his chest, locking eyes with him for a moment before pillowing your head on his shoulder.
Closely tucked in his embrace, you both start moving your feet to the slow cadence of the song playing on the radio.
“I’m sorry we didn’t get to dance today. I wanted to do something small, I didn’t think that you’d—” you say softly before he cuts you off.
“Sweetheart, don’t apologize. It was perfect. I wanted something small, too. I told you I didn’t care for fanfare. I like it like this, just you and me.”
You lift your head to look at him. “You’re the sweetest man I’ve ever met. How did I get so lucky?”
“All it took was a robber. I’d like to thank him personally for bringing us together,” he quips.
That’s exactly how you met. The tailoring shop you work at got robbed about a year ago, and Joe was the lead detective on the case. It was a terrifying experience, but it gave you Joe, so you have to look at it as a blessing. After a couple of follow-up interviews, he started showing up casually around the neighborhood to check in the place here and there until the robber was caught red-handed again, trying to rob a jewelry shop a couple of blocks away. By that time, Joe didn’t have any more excuses to show up, so he started bringing some of his personal pieces of clothing to fix. First a jacket, then a couple of shirts, a pair of pants… Until one day he built up the courage to ask you out for a coffee. Before you realized it, you were falling madly in love with him. It was never in your cards to marry again, but Joe was the odds that changed your luck. He wasn’t only great to you as a boyfriend, but the way he treated your daughter played a major factor on that decision.
“How are you feeling, sweetheart? Is our little buddy behaving today?” He glances down at your still seemingly inconspicuous four-month bump hidden under the loose fitting of your dress.
“Hm, he’s been an angel. I haven’t been sick all day. Just a little tired.”
“Yeah? You’re ready to go to bed?”
“No. Not yet. When the song ends.”
You lock your arms tight around his neck as he lets his forehead touch yours before letting his lips crash with yours in a firm kiss that almost makes your legs crumble down to the floor. His arms anchor you in place as the sweet undoing of his kiss sends you somewhere closer to heaven.
As the melody fades, your bodies come alive against the other. The magnetic pull of your unwavering love guides your lips to fuse together in a hot frenzy of desire. It hurts so good, you can't help but moan in his mouth. When you grow breathless, you pull back and turn around so he can unzip your dress. You quickly shed every piece of clothing and undergarment to consummate your marriage for the first time as husband and wife. It helps that you've had sex many times before, otherwise you'd be ridden with anxiety. But everything has always been so easy with Joe, and this night is no different. He makes you feel desired in ways you've never experienced before. He evokes something so powerful inside, you can't speak coherently without tripping over your words. So you suffocate him with kisses and hold him for as long as you can.
As your lungs lose the ability to breathe properly, he places you down on the mattress. Your body buzzes with anticipation when he kneels at the foot of the bed. He climbs his way between your legs that he spreads open as far as they can stretch. He kisses the inside of your thigh from you knew up to your groin, making your skin rise into pimples all over. His lips make an urgent stop at your center to bury his tongue between your folds. The eagerness to taste you causes your legs to shake like an earthquake. His tongue collects the essence of your arousal as if he was a starving man. Your core wounds up in an impossible knot made of fire that is almost unbearable to contain. You have to cover your mouth to muffle the sinful sounds that come out of your lips.
“Joe, honey,” you pant, extending your hand to grip at his hair so he would climb on top of you. “I want you inside me.”
Following your request, he slithers up your body, nestling between your legs, letting you feel his hardness against your sex. He deliciously rubs himself on your folds before guiding his cock between your soaked lips.
One of his hands holds your jaw, while his forehead leans against yours. His hips slowly push inside you, capturing the warmness of your walls that contract gently around him every time your hips slant against his moves.
“God, I love you so much, sweetheart,” his voice comes out ragged as he ups the pace of his thrusting.
“Not as much as I love you.” You use your hands to press harder on his ass, so you can feel every inch of him filling you up to the hilt.
Joe presses his mouth open against yours, seizing your breath as he takes you to the final line where your orgasm comes crashing against his own. They merge together for a second, surrounding both of you in a cloud of elation that rushes through the tangled mess of your bodies like thunder. Your legs tremble as the flutter of your opening squeezes every drop out of his seed.
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— Credits: beautiful divider by @cafekitsune
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cripplecharacters · 2 days ago
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Hello. I am writing about a main character who has Down syndrome (12 years old). How does a child like her would react to mother death and moving to an old house? I want to be respectful while writing her.
Hi asker,
So there are a couple different things to think about.
For one, death of a loved one is hard for everyone, and the death of a parent is very difficult for pretty much all children. Change is hard, and this is a very permanent change that can be very traumatic because a person a kid expects to be with for way more time is now gone. The closer the child was to her mother, the harder this is going to be for her.
On change being hard, ID can make it harder for her to adapt to change. "Harder" does not mean "impossible." "Harder" means maybe they have to make a plan to help her transition to her new living space, maybe it needs to be explained to her more often, things like that. Maybe she needs support from lots of visuals, maybe she's asking questions a lot of the time, maybe she has trouble with doing things because of the stress. And this is from just the change of moving – all of this will likely be compounded with the stress of not having her mother. For this, people can try to help her by trying to provide as much of a sense of normalcy and trying to make sure she can have some sort of... it doesn't have to be a routine per se, just trying to make sure that some things don't change.
Abstract concepts are sometimes hard for kids, although less so by age 12 than for younger children. Abstract concepts can also be more difficult for people with intellectual disability (as is likely the case for your character with Down Syndrome). So, how is the death explained to her?
Best practice to explain death to children, including and especially kids with I/DD, is to use concrete and simple language. Euphemisms don't help much, especially for children, because euphemisms have context behind them that a child doesn't have. Euphemisms can also be misunderstood and unclear.
So, if she actually understands what's going on because people are explaining things to her in a way she can understand, ultimately this is going to be much better for her than if she doesn't understand that her mother isn't coming back because people keep being vague and saying things like "she's in a better place" and she keeps hoping to join her mom in this "better" place. Or it might take some time for her to understand the situation, and she might experience delayed grief.
Who is she moving with? Who is going to take care of her — she's a kid, she can't do it all by herself. Does she know them already? Is she just meeting them? If she's never met them before, this will probably be even more stressful to her — basically every single thing in her life is changing. That's huge. That's stressful and can be hard for her to understand why everything is different.
Overall, at the end of the day she's just a person, a child specifically, being put in an incredibly difficult situation. She has emotions like anyone else — there is a misconception that people with Down Syndrome are always happy, and that's just not true. They have
She's in a situation where adults with zero disabilities would probably have a super rough time as well. Add on to that being a kid, and add on to that being intellectually disabled, and it's probably going to be a really stressful situation. So, think about how your character reacts when she's stressed out, and factor in her disability.
Here's some links to grief and I/DD and grief and children. I have read through them, though not all of them at length. They do have information that you can use, whether on how she'd react or how others around her could react, but either way use your own judgement.
Helping People With Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities Process Grief by the Boggs Center on Developmental Disabilities (PDF file)
Responding to Grief Reactions of People with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities by the Boggs Center on Developmental Disabilities (PDF File)
Bereavement In The Lives Of People With Intellectual Disabilities by the University of Hertfordshire's website on Intellectual Disability and Health
Managing Grief Better: People with Intellectual Disabilities by the University of Hertfordshire's website on Intellectual Disability and Health
Helping People With Intellectual Disabilities Cope With Loss by the Vanderbilt Kennedy Center (PDF File)
Hope this helps,
mod sparrow
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cakepoppresent · 2 days ago
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Don't Let Me Slap You
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Would Gideon actually beat the shit outta Malcolm if Veronica asked? No, but he would scare Malcolm a little cuz he would think it's funny
Transcript under the cut~
Veronica: Let me know. Should I beat your ass now or later?
Malcolm: What the hell did I do?
Veronica: Oh! So I should slap some sense into that thick skull of yours too?
Malcolm: I didn’t DO anything!
Veronica: Malcolm.
Veronica: Just think critically for 5 minutes. Do you think ignoring her messages and calls is any better?
Malcolm: I didn’t do anything. She shouldn’t be interested in looking for Andre. It's stupid and it's only going to get her hurt
Veronica: It’s like you want me to slap you in front of all these people
Malcolm: She’s the one that walked out on me.
Malcolm: I thought you’d be on my side.
Veronica: Lets use our thinking caps right now. You know you’re both very important to me yes?
Malcolm: Yes...
Veronica: So why did you think I’d side with you when your acting like an manipulative asshole. Is that how I raised you?
Malcolm: I’m...not being manipulative!!
Veronica: Refusing to talk to her? Ignoring her calls? Benji limits his contact with her so he won’t make YOU angry. All because she’s doing something you don’t want. Explain how that’s not manipulative.
Malcolm: *standing in slience foolishly*
Veronica: Well?? I’m waiting. Am I wrong?
Malcolm: *Refuses to answer*
Veronica: Yeah. That’s what I thought.
Malcolm: Why is no one on my side in this ?! Why am I in the wrong! Is it wrong to want to protect my peace?!
Veronica: Your way of protecting your peace means punishing Luna for wanting to do something you don’t like! That's unacceptable and I need you to cut that shit out TODAY and have an actual conversation with Luna OR ELSE I’ll get Gideon to beat the shit out of you
Malcolm: God! This isn’t FAIR. Its like no one is thinking about me or my feelings!
Veronica: Luna has ALWAYS put you first and you KNOW that.
Veronica: Let me ask you. That business man she’s been dating has she introduced him to you at all?
Malcolm:...She’s still seeing that scay ass dude?
Veronica: She’s been seeing that man for a YEAR and you know why she hasn’t introduced you? Do you wanna know?
Malcolm:....
Veronica: Because she KNOWS you don’t like him and doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable. Your feelings ALWAYS come first and it's pissing me off that the one time she wants to do something you’re punishing her for it.
Veronica: I’m giving you until the end of the fucking week to reach out to Luna and apologize for your shitty actions or I swear to God I’ll get Gidon to beat the fucking shit out of you. Do you understand?
Malcolm: FINE! Fuck whatever.
Veronica: Yeah thats what I fucking thought. Don’t make Luna cry and actually TALK to her
Malcolm: Wait...Shut up do you hear that?
Veronica: I beg your pardon? Are you insane?
Loser #1: Did you see that stuff about Luna online?
Loser #2: Be specific there is a bunch of shit being said about her
Loser #1: They’re saying that the dude she's been seen with is her “sponsor”. I guess since shes pimping herself out to the highest bidder
Loser #2: Hahaha shes “High Class” she won’t look at a poor man like you
Loser #1: Maybe if I take out a loan she would roll in the sack with me. It's clear she's in need of funds her family is in shambles!
Malcolm: I dare you to say that shit again. I fucking dare you
Loser #1: What the fuck is your problem
Malcolm: Say that shit again!
Loser #1: You’re mad about what I said about that whore of an actress? Who cares!
Malcolm: Bet.
Malcolm: If I fucking see or hear you on this campus again ima put your bitch ass 6 feet under do you understand?
Loser #1: What the fuck dude. Get the guck off me!
Malcolm: Do. You. Understand?
Loser #1: Yes! Jesus Christ you bastard get off me!
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kiwakiol · 3 days ago
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Part 2
Okay this idea is not letting me alone so I will add some more ideas I had. It's again way to late (2am). This Is more of a telling the a story. (Also free to use this for inspo if someone wants to turn this in a fanfic) 
Disclaimer : I'm Dislexic
Part 1
Hugh wakes up in Wades one room apartment in Logan's body, I would say about 1-2 months after the D&W movie. The fist thing he noticed is that every seems slightly different and he is hit with Logan's enhanced sense. Like everything is more vibrant he hears a lot of small things and not to forget the smells, I imagine that Wades apartment dose have a lot of strong smells that are not necessarily bad but just extrem. So Hugh needs to adjust to that fist and and than realize he is not in his home but a room that looked a lot like the Filme set from the Deadpool movies. 
When he makes his way out of the room he is in another room that he finds oddly familiar he is hit with a extem sweet smell that he follows. Wade is in the kitchen making some breakfast unaware that his Logen was replaced with the Australian actor Hugh Jackman. Hugh on the other hand is more the confused why (what he assumed is Ryan in his Deadpool make up) was standing in front of him.  They were finish with film a long time ago? He is beyond confused. Wade finally noticed that  Hugh has entered kitchen and greets him with something like "Morning Honeybadger. How did my favorite miserable X-Men sleep?" What confuses Hugh even more.
"Why are was the film set? And why are you in full make up Ryan?" Hugh question the man I from of him who just stared at him with unbelieving eyes. "Are you messaging with me, Wolvie? I mean I appreciate that you try to fit my vibe but the 4 wall braking is my thing. I'm am impressed that you remember that I told you they I'm played by Ryan Reynolds, if I had a star sticker I would give it to you for good effort."
Hugh still not understanding what was happening just look at Wade, silence field the room. "Is this suppose to be at Prank Ryan ? You know I love you and all but that a bit much. Built up the complete fire set and all. You know I'm currently working on a completely different movie..."  Hugh stop himself trying to figure out the face of the man that looked at him realizing it was full of shock 
Wade started to feel like this wasn't a joke and the man in front of him was genuinely confused. "Wait do you actually think I'm Ryan Reynolds? "
"Yeah of course, wo else would you be, you know I appreciate your little joke but this is a lit far what is even supposed to be the pranked? " said Hugh still looking at Wade who was starting to loose even more of his already lost mind. -Okay everything is cool- he thought to himself. He knew Logen wasn't one to make this kind of jokes, this jokes where his thing. Which meant that this was probably not his Logen, if he was even Logen, considering he called him Ryan this only could mean one thing "Wail your Hugh Jackman?!"
To how they could swap bodys maybe something paradox related I read a few fanfic where he came back to mess with Logan and Wade, or something went wronywit the timeline and now they have to figure out how to fix it. Maybe they try to contact the TVA or the X-Men to help.
Some prompt like idea:
- Wade desperately trying to explain Hugh that he is actually Wade. 
- Hugh being way to overwhelmd by all the new things he can hear/ smell
- Wade asking Hugh all kind of things about our world.
- Logens realization that his complete life is nothing more then a movie to entertain people in or world
- Ryan has to get used to Logen not being as calm and silly as Hugh.
- Logen seeing videos of Hugh and is surprised how joyful he is
- Logan bring pissed and confused why his claws don't come out and of no healing factor means he has to figure out how to be more careful in general.
- Ryan and Logan at Disneyland
- Ryan realizing that the multiverse exists and is not only a movie.
- Hugh experiences the horrors of 3 adamantium claws popping from his knuckles 
- Hugh being worried about Wade being hurt because he is not use to people just healing 
I will do a part 3 if I get any more ideas, no promises though. This entire idea just came from me daydreaming to music because I can't sleep.
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hexname · 17 hours ago
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Foreshadowing on point
(spoilers: S2)
as a tarot reader, I would like to explain how in these cards, there was everything about Viktor's future. I rewatched some scenes from S1 and, indeed, found some signs that could indicate what would happen in S2, so let me tell you about this one!
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It's important to point out these scenes are just a second apart. While Sevika is reading Tarot (or gambling with Tarot cards?), they still show Viktor's future, quite well actually
Death
An obvious assumption would be that Death card simply means dying, and yes, in this case, it was literal, since Viktor indeed died.
BUT, Death also symbolises an ending and a new beginning, which is, you guessed it, Viktor's Glorious Evolution that he talks about so dearly. He saw it as the end of people's suffering, and beginning of a new, better world.
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The card and the atmosphere also remind me of Viktor's "higher form" as I would say, since I really don't know how to call it. But, yeah, like a soul that parted ways with a body (which makes sense, considering Viktor here is a soul and can take bodies of his followers).
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The magician
The magician is someone who has stuff under their control, and Viktor has... well, whole timeline under his control, multiple timelines, even. At least he thought so. But the fact still remains: he used magic to control own body, modify it, and modify the bodies of others. He used magic as his tool, just as magician would.
Not to mention, that being on the card looks like Viktor himself, even has a third arm.
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At first, I thought that the symbol on the tarot card could have been some kind of a rune, but it's not, as far as I know from my research. Still, that white circle looks similar to one Viktor has behind his head.
In any case, I think it's save to say that this foreshadowing was great.
Now, about the initials at the bottom left corner
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I honestly, see M, V and J here, but I don't have a proper argument nor any theory that would make sense, except that these might be initials, as I said (Mel, Viktor, Jayce, perhaps). But again, I'm not sure what they could mean. Perhaps it's just a coincidence and I am looking way too into it because I love the complicated triangle between those three...
But yeah, that's all. I just wanted to share what I have noticed, and what I think I could have explained well. Do share your thoughts about it, though!
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tododeku-or-bust · 20 hours ago
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If it's ok I have some thoughts about that post about whiteness you just reblogged. Parts of it are good but I do feel it's too usamerican centric. Not in a "hur dur us europeans are better and racism isn't real here" way but because the explanation they partly give for white supremecy is a lack of identity/culture and as someone who grew up in a european country that has a strong sense of identity it doesn't explain the rampant white supremecy issues we also have here. I think it's a big blind spot and that its a dangerous fallacy. I'd love to hear your thoughts
I mean, yes and no. The loss of culture bit as an excuse is definitely American, though I assumed the post was primarily talking to white Americans. Because there was a trade off when they all came to colonize here. It's a lot easier to convince poor white migrants that "hey at least you're white" when you tell them to give up everything about themselves to make sure they don't bond with the local oppressed people of color and revolt. So that did happen, on purpose.
The thing about whiteness being an identity of power to band behind is pretty universal, though. It's why when you put a bunch of Europeans from different nations together, they'll squabble like a mf. The Brits and French thinking they're better than Irish and Italians, who think they're better than the Polish and Greeks, and whatever combo.
But the MOMENT you put someone that visibly isn't them (i.e. not white) in the room, that bond of whiteness clicks. That hierarchy snaps into place, that "I might not be as white as you, but I'm CERTAINLY not them". It's how you end up with people who are afraid of dying in Ukraine under Russia's thumb somehow having time to still hate Black migrants and aid workers. Everyone might not know who they are, but they sure know who they aren't. And that's part of the allure and power of whiteness, and thus white supremacy.
But that's me. There are people who could probably explain it better.
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fyeahnix · 2 days ago
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Hiiiiii I love your blog and your writing so much.
I know you have a hc that Sevika is bilingual, can you elaborate on that? Who taught her Spanish? Did she grow up speaking it? Does she do that thing where she forgets the English word for something and has to make up something to describe it? Does she say things in Spanish when people ask her to tell them something knowing they don’t speak Spanish so she can go “what, I told you already?”
Also I would die if she referred to me as “mi mujer” 😭😭😭
Thank you, have a great day!
Hello, anon! Thank you for the kind words 😄
So, yeah I think I mentioned this in a random throwaway Sevika headcanon post and haven't ever elaborated on this. But yes...
One of my headcanons for Sevika is that she is trilingual, and that stems from her family. First and foremost, I don't play League and I don't know shit about League lore outside of the bits of research I did to write for some Sevika stuff. I do see that League lore is incredibly detailed and expansive (which is fascinating to me) but there's still a lot that hasn't been explained from what I can tell? It looks like there are multiple languages that exist in Runeterra, which makes sense considering how many sentient races and ethnic groups there are. So let's talk about that for a second so you can understand my thought process on this. Walk with me here.
First off, this is, of course, a fantasy universe so the concept of languages and the countries they come from don't exist in that universe in the same way they do here. For example, there is no country called Spain, and therefore, there is no language called Spanish. So how does that work in my head? Easy. Use an existing language as a proxy for a fantasy one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I mean...are the characters speaking English in Arcane? Clearly no, because Germanic languages and the countries they derive from don't exist. They're speaking whatever local language exists in that universe. I figured why not add some other IRL languages for flavor? So with that being said, this is where we get to another headcanon.
If we're going by ethnic background, I like to imagine Sevika as Afro-Latino from her father's side and South Asian through her mother. Why? Her VA, Amirah Vann, is Afro-Latina (African American father and Puerto Rican mother) and speaks fluent Spanish. Sevika's name appears to be Indian in origin and I mean...like look at her lol. She is clearly meant to be, in our world, South Asian, most likely Indian. I obviously do not know what region of Runeterra this ethnic background would translate to. Maybe Shurima???
Given that background (and the bit of trivia about her VA), that's how I came up with her being trilingual. Learned all three languages growing up in the home. "Spanish" from her father, and a third language I haven't decided yet (Hindi? Urdu? Sanskrit? Punjabi? Don't know yet, need to research) from her mother.
Why? Well...why not lol. Truthfully, I thought it'd be interesting to make up some additional reasons why she's so fit to be Silco's right hand. Piltover and Zaun are port cities, and being port cities, you're going to come across a lot of people from a lot of different cultures who speak a lot of different languages. Basically the idea here is that Silco chose her as his second because of a variety of factors:
Multilingual, helps with gaining trust and securing deals
Trusted patron at The Last Drop
Same end goal of liberating Zaun
Loyalty
Can hold her own if shit goes south
Intimidating (she's fucking huge and can beat your ass)
Good at reading people
Surprisingly good at negotiation when she does bother speaking
And now that we know that Sevika herself was the one handling the majority of the deals (she said so herself in Season 2), I like this headcanon even more lmfao. Like here's an excerpt from an unreleased piece of writing I did that mentioned it:
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The downside here ofc is that I, personally, only speak one language lol. I took Japanese in high school for 4 years and can't remember much except how to read hiragana and katakana (should have studied more!). I am absolutely going to have a lot of blindspots when it comes to things that only bilingual folks or folks who speak more than one language experience, and that is something that would be worth doing a bit more research on. Quirks like the ones you mentioned are things I forget that people experience 😅
That is a bit long so sorry for that, but I hope this answers your questions well.
Keep in mind: these are just headcanons. That's it. This is for fun. If you think something different, then do you!
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@ash-fall7 @the-anonmaton @peanutbutterprincess @thesevi0lentdelights @kylorey25
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happyfoolz · 3 days ago
Text
unexpected. — #3. tiny server
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a/n: i read that in korea you pay your check at the counter and tipping is not common, so that's what i went with btw!
warnings: sexual jokes (kinda), mentions (and a picture) of food, yn is still going through it
wc: 1.9k + sns
<- chapter two | masterlist | chapter four ->
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You still can't believe it. 
What have you ever done to deserve this?
The image of Soobin leaving with that short-haired girl, with the most adorable smile plastered on his face and his ears slightly tinted red, still plagues your mind like a curse you can't escape from.
You should've known! The second Kai called and told you he was sick and wouldn't be able to make it to the restaurant tonight, you should've taken that as a clear sign from the universe that things were bound to blow up in your face. Why else would your sunshine friend be taken away from you on such a big night?
The worst part is how much effort you put into looking cute. Did you seriously put on the cutest dress you own just to watch as the love of your life slipped between your fingers? Did you really spend almost an hour on your hair and makeup just to be humiliated?
"Earth to Y/N!" Taehyun snaps his fingers in front of you as you stare into the void. "Look, I know things didn't work out the way you thought they would, but you seriously need to snap out of it."
"You wouldn't be saying that if you witnessed the love of your life leaving with the most gorgeous girl you've ever seen," you respond dramatically.
You can't even blame Soobin. Hell, even you would like to get her number and leave this place with her. The girl's stunning.
He stares blankly at you for a few seconds, his eyes not blinking at all, not knowing how to even react to that. After a moment of silence, he finally lets out the deepest of sighs.
"Okay," he grabs one of your hands gently, placing it between both of his, "look at me."
"What?" 
"You don't even know the guy. He's not the love of your life just because he's tall and handsome or whatever." He sounds like he's talking to a child, very patiently explaining something that seems obvious to everyone else but the kid — in this case, you.
"No, you don't get it!" You insist, pouting. "We had a connection!"
"Noona, I love you, you know I do, but you can't assume you're gonna end up with someone just because you dreamed about it once or twice," he sounds almost motherly. It would be funny, if you weren't the one being lectured now. "I dreamed I was dating Sabrina Carpenter the other night. Do you think it was because we're soulmates and we're bound to be together, or because you made me watch every single music video she has ever released in one sitting?" He raises an eyebrow at you. "We eat here every week, so you see him regularly, and obviously he's a good-looking dude, so it makes sense that you'd see him in your dreams. But do you even know anything about this man besides his name?"
You furrow your eyebrows, jutting out your lower lip even more. You know he's right, but you're too stubborn to admit it because you hate it.
Looking around, you can see the guy who hosted the quiz session eating something while two girls in medieval-looking dresses chat him up, a table of five people talking way too loudly, and a few couples at other tables, but most people have already left now that the "big event" is over.
And honestly, what a boring event it was. You didn't know what the hell anyone was talking about, everyone was too loud and overly excited for reasons you couldn't understand, Soobin was constantly in a hurry, and… well, here you are now while he's probably kissing his girl. 
And his girl is not you. 
"Yeah, whatever," you reluctantly give in, folding your arms.
"Good evening," a polite voice chips in, and Taehyun immediately lets go of your hand and leans back on his chair. "I'm Beomgyu! My colleague had to leave a little earlier due to a personal emergency, so I'll be your server for the rest of the night."
You look up at him, trying not to show that your life is currently in shambles.
It's the other waiter, the shortest one among the boys. His eyes are bigger, his brown hair is slightly longer and lighter than Soobin's, his shoulders are not as broad, you can't see any dimples on his cheeks, and his…
"Can I get you anything? Maybe some dessert?" He goes on, unknowingly snapping you out of your sad, pathetic daze.
"Actually, can we get some fries, please? To go, if that's alright," Taehyun answers. "I think we're ready to leave now, but our friend will start World War III if we don't bring her fries."
Beomgyu chuckles politely. "Of course! Anything else?"
"I'd like a shot of vodka," you say, staring into nothing once more, "or ten."
"Oh. Uh, well, the ba–" 
Taehyun clears his throat, interrupting the server.
"She'll have a can of Sprite, please. And a straw."
"But Tyun!" You whine, pouting once again.
"But Y/N!" Your friend mocks you. "You're driving tonight and I'm not about to die in a car crash because of you," he says, more seriously now. "Besides, you don't even like vodka."
"Ugh, fine. A Sprite for me while we wait for those fries, then, please…" You attempt to smile politely at the waiter.
He bites his lips and nods, writes down your order, and then smiles back at you.
"Alright, ma'am, I'll get that right away for you."
"Oh, please don't call me ma'am, it's been enough of a humiliating night for me."
"Um, sorry… Miss?"
You nod at him slowly. "Thank you."
Taehyun also smiles at the boy, but as soon as he's out of earshot, your friend goes back to telling you off.
"Jesus Christ, Y/N," he hisses, "vodka? Really?"
"This is the worst night of my life," you whine. "I deserve some alcohol."
"I can think of at least ten nights that were worse for you than this one," he argues — and, once again, he's right. "You'll survive."
"God, just let me be dramatic for once! Look at me!" Your hands gesture to your own body. "I got all dolled up! And for what?"
"Exactly! You look good as fuck! You shouldn't be suffering right now because of some random dude."
You grunt and support your chin on your palms, your elbows resting on the table. "I hate this."
Yet another sigh escapes from him, but he finally changes his tone back to a more understanding and loving one. "Alright, listen. Do you wanna cancel the sleepover with Chaewon?"
You stare up at him, speechless for a few seconds.
"No! Why would I–"
"Excuse me, sorry," Beomgyu's soft voice interrupts you, placing the can on the table. "Here's your Sprite, and here's your straw. Would you like a glass and some ice?"
"Oh, um– that's okay, I'll just use the straw. We'll probably be leaving before I finish this anyway."
"Alright! Your fries will be here in just a few minutes."
"Thank you, Beomgyu." You offer him another smile, and wait until he's far away before you continue your bickering with your best friend: "Why would I cancel the fucking sleepover? Do you want me to die?"
"Well, I don't know! Like you said, you got all dolled up. We could take you to a party where you can find a random hot stranger to hook up with or something," he states, while opening the can of soda for you. "I'm sure Chae wouldn't be against it, and this way your outfit wouldn't go to waste."
"I don't want a random hot stranger! I just want–“
"Hey, shush," he cuts you off, and it looks like he's about to laugh. "Unless you want all of his coworkers to know you want his dick."
You immediately slap the back of his head. How dare he say that? He winces, but ends up laughing while rubbing the spot you just hit.
"I don't want his dick, I want his heart," you speak almost in a whisper.
"Tomayto-tomahto." Taehyun shrugs and drinks a sip of your soda before giving it to you. 
"Shut up," you mutter, finally grabbing the Sprite. "I fucking hate you."
"I'm sure you do." He hands you the straw, and the smug smile on his face makes you roll your eyes before you take it.
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"Hello again!" Beomgyu comes over one last time, just a few minutes after bringing your soda. "Here are your fries." He places a paper bag on the table. "Can I help you with anything else?"
"Oh, it's okay, we'll get going now," you tell him. "Thank you again."
"Alright, you guys have a good night, then!"
"You too." You smile politely at the boy.
After he leaves, you grab your stuff, get up, and follow your friend to the counter. You're about to grab your wallet when Taehyun gestures for you not to. Before you know it, he's already exchanging pleasantries with the cashier and swiping his card, although you agreed to pay for his stuff tonight. It's fine, though. You can always get him some snacks another time to make up for it.
After he's done paying, you text Chaewon to let her know you'll pick her up soon. She asks if you bought the fries she requested, and when you say yes, she just tells you to "hurry up then". 
However, before you reach the door, the server who replaced Soobin intercepts your path.
"Oh, hey, um–" He offers you another paper bag. "Here."
You knit your eyebrows in confusion and exchange a quick look with Taehyun before looking at the boy in front of you again, totally lost.
"Um," you lift the bag you're carrying, "you already g–"
"Oh! No, no. This is for you," he interrupts you to clarify what's happening. "Brownie bites, you know, from the dessert menu. On the house, I mean. Sorry, I don't mean to be disrespectful or anything, it's just that you kinda look like you could use a little pick-me-up."
It takes you a beat to get it, but when you do, a smile creeps on your lips.
"Oh." You don't know why he's acting so sweet — do you really look that miserable? —, but the gesture brings you warmth after the bucket of ice-cold water Choi Soobin dumped on your head earlier. So, of course, you accept the little treat. You deserve it, don't you? "That's… very kind of you, actually. Thank you so much." Your voice sounds much sweeter now. "Have a great night, Beomgyu."
He nods, a timid smile appearing on his face. "You too."
As soon as you're out the door, Taehyun puts his hands in his pockets and laughs quietly.
"What is it now?" You bump your shoulder against his. "If you're laughing at how miserable I am right now I'll kill you, I swear."
"It's not that," he says. "But this is kinda funny."
"What's funny? There's not a single thing that happened tonight that was funny," you counter.
He shakes his head.
"Let's buy some ice cream on the way, I'm kinda craving it."
You sigh, but give up easily. "Yeah, okay." He's avoiding your question, but you're not gonna force him to answer it. "But I'm paying."
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<- chapter two | masterlist | chapter four ->
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