#i don't have sky sports so i can't watch the game

[fanfiction-collection]

AGGIEEEE!!

[astonmartinii]

mamma mia | formula one social media au

drivers: sebastian vettel, jenson button and fernando alonso

what the hell is in the water in greece? why are pregnancy tests so expensive and why does seb name his vehicles like that?

fernandoalo_oficial

liked by maxverstappen1, aussiegrit and 803,450 others

location: greece

fernandoalo_oficial: had a great break in greece recharging the old batteries 🔋

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user1: old man who is this woman?

landonorris: who taught you to soft launch grandpa?

fernandoalo_oficial: hey! respect your elders

landonorris: you just called yourself old? and WHO IS THIS?

fernandoalo_oficial: none of your damn business kid

user2: why is he particularly dilfy lately?

user3: he's approaching silver fox territory i fear

jensonbutton: i see that greece was a popular spot for wold champions this break?

fernandoalo_oficial: i also saw, sad not to bump into you old friend :(

maxverstappen1: where was my invite ???

jensonbutton: cool world champions only

lewishamilton: excuse me?

fernandoalo_oficial: idk what to tell you it wasn't planned, me, jenson and sebastian just have good taste

sebastianvettel: i see mary goodnight was appreciated

fernandoalo_oficial: yes thank you for lending me your boat, huge hit with the ladies

sebastianvettel: very happy with my choice to get it deep cleaned before i got there

fernandoalo_oficial: first of all, i'm not dirty. second of all, thanks for the faith in my game big man

user4: i am so confused by this comment section I DID NOT WANT TO KNOW ALONSO FUCKED ON SEB'S BOAT ???

yourusername

liked by yourbff, oliviarodrigo and 1,340.987 others

tagged: yourbff

yourusername: (sober) brunch with a side of light baby daddy investigation

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user7: only y/n would end up in a mamma mia situation, stay strong

yourusername: omg i didn't even realise, but donna was always a bad bitch, so i will just be the same

user8: i can't believe i am watching a girl investigate her own baby daddies on the internet (i love this place)

yourbff: if we can't find the lucky men, at least they'll have a cool ass aunt

yourusername: all fun and games until you have to change a nappy

user9: i'm enjoying this saga, BUT, why can't we just wait and do a paternity test

yourusernmae: i still need to know them to do that... and being nosey is far more fun

user10: all i'm thinking is this girl has to have GAME for three dilfs in the span of like three days... RESPECT 🫡

user11: i am so invested in this... please be interesting people 🤞

jensonbutton

liked by sebastianvettel, fernandoalo_oficial and 401,330 others

jensonbutton: back on sky duty and bumped into a couple of familiar faces

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user12: who let these old men talk about their sex lives on a live broadcast?

user13: i am entertained tbf

user14: obsessed with both needing to reinforce the fact that they pulled in greece

user15: i need seb to jump in on this conversation ASAP

fernandoalo_oficial: not happy with you pinning all of my success on seb's boat mate

jensonbutton: was it all your charming personality?

fernandoalo_oficial: obviously

sebastianvettel: i can confirm that it's always all the boat

jensonbutton: is that a confession?

sebastianvettel: gentleman don't kiss and tell x

charles_leclerc: jesus christ and we're the generation ruining the sport?

jensonbutton: f1 has always been slutty, you guys are letting us down

maxverstappen1: clearly you guys are still active enough to keep up the reputation yourselves

sebastianvettel

liked by charles_leclerc, jensonbutton and 902,180 others

sebastianvettel: retirement is looking fun, glad to take mary goodnight out for her first spin

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user21: did he just say mary goodnight? SEB WHAT?

user22: omfg he is potential baby daddy two??

charles_leclerc: so seb got a bit too lucky in greece?

user23: CHARLES?

user24: i am losing my mind they were right, they are the baby daddies

user25: i knew as soon as she said a nando with a samurai tattoo

user26: @yourusername he's number two !!!!!

user27: @yourusername we found him, boat and all

landonorris: YOU'RE POTENTIAL BABY DADDY TWO SEB WHAT THE FUCK

sebastianvettel: i don't understand lando

landonorris: check your texts

user28: don't forget the others lando

landonorris: @fernandoalo_oficial check your texts (and forward it to jenson i don't have his number)

fernandoalo_oficial: okay?

yourusername: WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

user29: i think someone needs to check on her

yourusername

liked by sebastianvettel, fernandoalo_oficial and 1,509,600 others

yourusername: i hot girl summer-ed a bit too close to the sun, what do you mean the three dilfs were f1 world champions?

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sebastianvettel followed yourusername

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jensonbutton followed yourusername

note: AHHHHHH? idk if i love it or hate it? do i know who i plan on being the dad? no. but do i plan on expanding on this? yes. mamma mia chaos will return.

[koolades-world]

Can you do some crack headcanons for Obey Me where some accident causes MC to temporary get wings that are not only huge af but also let them fly super fast? Like a singular flap could cause MC to almost bump into the ceiling at Diavolo's castle alone. They can also zoom through the air at high speeds and you can just hear the "ZYOOOOOM"

One thing I can imagine is Lucifer teaching MC how to fly and immediately regretting it cuz he's the only one who can get even remotely close to them when they're flying and MC finds it funny to fly away from him(it's also out of fear of what will happen once he gets them)

hi! haha yeah of course! this is too funny can kinda imagine mc going splat like a in a cartoon LOL

let's set the scene: solomon fed you something weird that he cooked up in a cauldron after promising you something you want, and this makes you grow these super large, super strong wings. he swears they'll go away eventually, but it's up to you if you believe that or not. how does your man react?

Mc with temporary wings

Lucifer

kinda like a disapproving dad for accepting yet another strange potion from solomon

despite this, he takes you under his wing (haha get it?) and teaches you how to control them

once you get comfortable, you invite him to play games that he pretends he doesn't have time for but always joins in on. he secretly really enjoys having someone to

gosh,,, sky tag 🥺 the silly potential is endless since in the sky, there are no expectation for either of you

Mammon

probably also would have taken that offer from solomon

as another wing haver, he can help you out a little

the first time he tried to give you lessons, you accidentally smacked him in the face and sent him into the wall behind you

after that, he’s much more careful, and once you get the hang of it, he's teaching you his crafty ways

Levi

manages to reference at least three different animes he's seen around the situation

he thinks your wings are so cool but won't admit it

at one point, he takes you diving at Siren Beach for fun since you would be able to move through the water quickly with the large wings. lotan joins and you end up finding lots of cool stuff!

afterwards, he helps you dry off your wings since that wasn't exactly something you thought about before you got in the water

Satan

he's quick to ask solomon about how he made the potion out of curiosity

also asks if he can study your wings and watches you as you learn to fly

kinda goes science mode on you

since he knows how tiring carrying around that new weight must be, so he gives you lots of tasty food to replenish your energy, and offers you massages! (he learnt from simeon, the best)

Asmo

over the moon! he thinks they're so beautiful and almost wants to ask solomon to give him a pair too

he will accessorize you even if you run away, so expect lots of him hustling after you with all his ribbons and bows in hand

"Mc, sweetie, you're gonna look so cute!" is holding the ugliest old lady esque bows ever

teaches you all his favorite arial tricks even though both of you realize early on that you don't have the agility required with how large your wings are

Beel

can't comprehend how fast you are with those things

even though he also has wings, you fly circles around him with yours (if you even have the control for that)

quickly introduced you to aerial sports and the two of you find games to play together, even though it's kinda hard considering how different your wings and skillsets are

since they're only temporary, he wants you to make the most of them, and takes you sight seeing!

Belphie

you're literally just a pillow as far as he's concerned now

they're perfect for wrapping himself in and if you wanted, you could hide the two of you in them

when you're practicing flying, he yells out all sorts of useless "useful" tips, such as not to run into something you've already hit

he just sits on the sidelines, wrapped in a blanket, watching lazily amused

[forfucksakesniall]

Heyy girll i really love your work so much and idk if u take requests but if u do can u do a lewis one where him and his wife have a daughter,(12,13yo) and lewis gets interviewed by his daughter in sky sports channel And she keep asking him funny questions etc.(like that vid when he got interviewed by a little boy)

Hello miss ma'am! Thank you so much for the support. I love this idea so much. I hope you like this.

The Interview

Lewis and his daughter come into the studio, hand in hand, and everybody looks at them in awe. It is obvious that his daughter is a daddy's girl, with the way he dresses her and styles her hair. She has her own personal stylist, and she also likes it when you do it, her mommy, but she says it's different when her daddy does it.

As they reach the chairs and the cameras start rolling, she looks around and back at her dad, seeking a sign if she should start.

“Hello Darling,” Lewis says while smiling at her.

“No, daddy! Call me by name...” she tells him.

Lewis does his old man laugh and restarts the interview.

”Sorry, sorry, umm... Hello, Eleanor.”

“Hi, Sir Lewis Hamilton.”

“Oh no! That's weird, darling. Can't you just call me daddy?”

“It's an interview…”

“Alright, Alright...”

Cut to the interview.

"If you had to eat one super weird meal before every game, what would it be?” she asks.

“Well, I’ve tried some weird food around the world, a lot of foreign foods.”

“How about a sandwich filled with marshmallows, pickles, and chocolate sauce?” she suggests.

“Your mom sure enjoyed that one just because her craving is crazy, and I wouldn’t want to try that..”

“Yeah, me either. It's icky…” she adds.

They both laugh at your weird food cravings lately because of your pregnancy. But now it's news to everyone since Lewis has always been a private person, and getting this interview was even more rare.

"What's your go-to victory dance when you score or win a race? Can you show us a quick move?”

“I usually don't show it on camera, but you could say I've got some moves, right?”

She looks directly at the camera with a side-eye without needing to say anything more.

“What? Are you saying I don’t?” Lewis asks.

”Mommy said not to call you out when you're lying.”

Lewis bursts out laughing.

“I have a question for you now,” Lewis says.

“How come you cheer on Mick when you watch the races?”

She blushes cutely.

“I don’t know… He looks like Ken... from Barbie.”

“Looks like I’ll be having a little talk with Mick then,” he teases.

“Daddy no! You always embarrass me when he is around…” she says back.

The interview went on with their father-daughter antics, and after a few hours, they finally finished, and it was time to head back home.

“You did great today, darling.”

“I know, Daddy.”

He smiles at his daughter's remark and kisses her on the head.

“Let's get back to your mommy and little baby, yea?”

She nods and takes his hand, heading to the car.

[hadesoftheladies]

men are so annoying my god. they have some of the dumbest takes on women's sports its obvious how disingenuous they are. "wnba players are jealous of caitlyn clark" and all most of them were saying was that caitlyn has a lot to learn playing professional basketball because it's a genuinely tough game and they hope she succeeds. men just keep belittling how skilled a lot of wnba players are and have been until caitlyn clark. they make fun of the wnba without watching it and then act like they know everything and declare caitlyn the sole saviour of the wnba like we haven't had legends like Elena Delle Donne or A'ja Wilson dominating the game. EMBARASSING!

ALSO they are RIGHT to complain about the racism since most brand deals and sponsorships for wnba players are white women. im happy that female athletes are winning and getting money, but it's telling when 70% of the basketball league are black women and most of the sponsorships are held by white women.

the way these goons take out the nuance and the humanity when discussing women's sports and reduce it to infantile squabbles of jealousy just shows how underdeveloped their brains are. like i know you men like inventing drama out of nowhere, but can you just stick to discussing stats? you're so cringe fr.

anyways!

I can't wait to see Stewie for New York Liberty on the court! Las Vegas Aces, Chicago Sky, Indiana Fever and the Washington Mystics are about to give us one hell of a season coming this May 14th. I'M SO HYPED!

Here are the women to watch out for (IMO because I'm biased and not in order of skill)

#1. Breanna Stewart (Stewie) (New York Liberty)

I pledge allegiance. Sincerely. She's so fun on court and weaves between players like that scene in Korra when she had to learn air-bending by evading spinning doors. I can't wait to see her play! (Next to her wife I'm her no# 1 fan don't joke around with me). Check some of her playing out here.

Also, here's a video of her eating spicy wings and barely surviving (while telling her story):

#2. Angel Reese (Chicago Sky)

After an amazing career in college basketball, Reese finally got drafted to the Chicago Sky WNBA team early this year. She's gotten a lot of hate for being justifiably boastful about her skills but she's remained a strong leader for her teammates and had a positive impact on girls and women everywhere. This is her first season in the WNBA and you can expect a show from her! Check some of her highlights here!

Here's a video explaining why she's so freaking iconic:

#3. Aaliyah Edwards (Washington Mystics)

One of the top picks of this year's WNBA draft, Aaliyah has been a star player for UCONN for years. She is one of the highest rated draft picks of the season! This will be her first season on the WNBA playing for the Washington Mystics. Her rebounds and offences are amazing to witness. Watch her highlights here.

#4. A'ja Wilson (Las Vegas Aces)

One of WNBA's modern GOAT'S. A'ja IS INSANE. She intimidates everyone on court and then the court itself. I literally saw the basketball hoop shaking when she looked at it during one of her games! I swear. It peed itself. Her wingspan and strength make her so formidable like y'all just have to watch herrrr!! Oh yeah, and she won the championship and several MVP titles. Check her out here!

#5. Caitlyn Clark (Indiana Fever)

Does she really need an introduction? Her career in college basketball has been spectacular and special for women's sports everywhere! She was breaking records in HIGH SCHOOL! This is going to be her first season in the WNBA and more eyes than ever will be on the game because of her! Check some of her highlights playing for Iowa here.

#6. Rickea Jackson (Los Angeles Sparks)

While playing small-forward on her college team, Rickea made a name for herself as one of the most aggressive offensive players in women's college basketball today! She's strong and fast and alert and is genuine fun to watch. You won't want to miss out on her debut into the WNBA for the LA Sparks! Watch her game highlights here.

#7. Kelsey Plum (Las Vegas Aces)

Kesley Plum is just one of my favorite athletes of all time! She's so dedicated to her team and the people in her life and it shows. Her joy is so infectious! She is also an incredibly, impressively strong and SKILLED athlete! And she was a big reason why LVA won the season last year. (And hallelujah she's divorcing her dumbass husband rn! hopefully the dead weight makes her an even stronger player!). Watch some of her highlights here.

AND CHECK OUT THIS VIRAL VIDEO OF HER THROWING A T-SHIRT TO HER FATHER WHO IS FAR UP IN THE BLEACHERS!

#8. Sabrina Ionescu

Sabrina and Stewie are an unstoppable duo! Watching them play is electric for me! WHEW! Sabrina has made WNBA history with idek how many records! She is the top in the league in assists, triple-doubles, and steals. SHE'S INSANE!!! SHE'S FUCKING RABID!!!! See for yourself here!

Watch her break the all-time three point record like it's nothing here:

#9. Cameron Brink

Cameron Brink debuts in this season of the WNBA for the Sparks! Cameron has had an amazing college career, but is especially known for her strong defence (and being the god-sister of Stephen Curry). She's bound to have a promising season. Watch some of her highlights here.

The strongest teams (IMO) seem to the Aces, the Mystics, the Sparks and New York Liberty. But there are also strong players in teams like Indiana Fever, Dallas Wings and Minnesota Lynx.

If you don't know which team to support, you could just pick your favourite athlete and choose their team. Some people like underdog teams and some people like top dog teams. Based on last season, I'd consider Indiana Fever an underdog team and Las Vegas Aces the top dog team (they won last season). In terms of best teams? LVA players are SEAMLESS. They move like water and it's magical to watch. But so are the Liberties and the Mystics! I genuinely don't know who to pick between those three.

If any of you gyns watch WNBA, please tell me who you're supporting this season and why!

Anybody who wants to start the season with me in May 14th, comment or reblog and maybe we can organize a discord for it! I'd love to watch this with you guys! And I'm all up for team rivalries.

[deprivedofbraincellsandsleep]

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊GET TO KNOW ME⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊

FREE PALESTINE‼️🇵🇸🇵🇸

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-> general knowledge: penname is zia, she/her, ISTP-T, ambivert??, cancer (dont believe in zodiac signs tho), love cats, i cant shut up: lazy as hell, have the 24/7 urge to yeet myself off my balcony

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊FANDOMS⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊

-> books: all for the game, the raven cycle, pjo, folk of the air, a good girls guide to murder, the inheritance games, keeper of the lost cities, six of crows, the naturals, diary of a wimpy kid, harry potter/marauders era (I forgot everything else I've read+I don't join the fandom of every book/series I read sooo yeah)

-> movies/TV shows: brooklyn nine-nine, flipped, the umbrella academy, OBX, young sheldon, peaky blinders (still watching), shadow and bone, gilmore girls, jurassic franchise/camp cretaceous, carmen sandiego (theres more but I can't remember)

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊MISCELLANEOUS⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊

-> I hate sports, very much prefer to stay inside

-> I read too much fanfiction, scroll too much on tumblr and pinterest

-> team jameson but I love Grayson, he is my pookie

-> I hate phone girl/lyra kane (sorry pooks)

-> I'm the biggest procrastinator in history and I have a very short attention span and reading is my coping mechanism and my comfort thing

-> I also know how to crochet but I barely do it

-> I rarely have motivation to do anything

-> I love taking sky pics

-> I LOVE stars

-> I wanna learn how to skateboard, oil paint, learn many languages

PERSONAL TAGS: #this is why I'm deprived of braincells and sleep #what is she yapping about #ask #anon (currently in the process of tagging my old posts)

(dividers by @saradika-graphics)

[comically-callous]

Muggleborn reader taking Reggie to a sport game

I'm alive.

Regulus Black x reader

A/n TYSM FOR 100 FOLLOWERS HOLY SHIT???? This is the most American baseball game you could possibly think of despite the fact that this supposedly takes place in Britain. Sorry if anything's super inaccurate I'm not a sports person 😕 Anyways requests are open.

"I can't believe I'm actually doing this." Regulus said as you dragged him along behind you.

A cool summer breeze drifted through the air as you and your best friend walked toward the line for the ticket booth.

"I can't either. I thought you'd chicken out on me last minute." You teased and he rolled his eyes.

You'd somehow managed to convince your best friend, Regulus, to accompany you to a baseball game over the summer break. And it really did take some major convincing. His parents were quite adamant about his total lack of engagement with anything even slightly related to muggles. That's why they didn't know about you, and that's why they didn't know Regulus had snuck out to spend time with you.

Once the two of you found a spot in line, you turned to Regulus and smiled. "But, seriously. I'm glad you could make it." You said sweetly.

Regulus' eyes darted down to where your hands were still interlinked.

"Oh," You let go of his hand and nervously looked away. "Sorry."

"No, it's okay." His cheeks turned slightly pink as he put his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

After standing in the line for about 10 minutes, the two of you finally got your tickets and walked into the stadium.

Regulus' eyes seemed to be constantly moving, looking at all of the things he'd probably never seen before.

"Do you wanna get food right now or should we wait?" You asked.

Regulus looked back to you. "They serve food here?"

"I don't have muggle money." Regulus stated.

"You can't go to a muggle sports event without them serving food." You chuckled as you led him to one of the concession stands.

"Who said I was making you pay?" You pulled out your wallet and handed him $20

Regulus blinked, suprised. "You don't have to pay for me, Y/n." He tried to hand the money back.

"No!" You made him close his hand around the money and pushed it back to him. "This is your first time going to a baseball game! You can't go to a baseball game without getting concessions."

Regulus, once again, blushed when you touched his hand. "... Fine."

The two of you were finally in your seats with all of your concessions. You had to explain how the game worked to Regulus and he seemed to understand after a while.

Once the game started Regulus glanced over to you. "So... What team are we supposed to be cheering for?" He asked.

"The guys wearing red." You answered.

"And that's because?"

"Because they're superior."

"What if I don't agree?" He challenged.

"Then I'll leave you at this stadium in the cold and dark to fend for yourself." You replied sarcastically.

He gasped. "You wouldn't!" He chuckled. "You love me too much."

You let a smile play on your lips. "Yeah. You're right."

Regulus felt his cheeks grow hot and he quickly looked away, turning his attention back to the game.

By the time the game was over, the sun was down. Regulus has spent most of the game feeling a bit flustered, blushing everytime your hands brushed against one another, his glances lingering a second too long.

"So, time to go now?"

"Nope." You shook your head. "We've gotta stay for the fireworks."

"The fireworks?"

"Yeah. They shoot off fireworks after the games every weekend." You said. "I wanna watch them, if that's okay with you."

"Yeah... Yeah, it sounds nice."

A few minutes passed before the first firework shot into the sky, painting the night sky with a stunning blue color.

You gasped and excitedly shook Regulus' arm a bit. "They're starting!"

Regulus looked over to you. Your eyes were wide and seemed to sparkle as they looked up at the firework display.

You were so beautiful.

"Y/n..." His voice was soft. Like he was whispering something only your ears would ever get to hear.

"Yeah?" You turned your attention to him.

"I uh..." He felt his heart beat fast. "Can I tell you something?"

You silently nodded and he continued. "I should've told you this way sooner, and I totally get it if you're weirded out by this or whatever... I... Like you. I like you a lot. And I have for a while now."

You sat there, stunned for a moment. His heart beat faster in anticipation for your response.

You finally spoke. "Seriously?"

"Seriously." He nodded. "Is... That okay?"

You paused for a split second. "More than okay." You leaned toward him and softly kissed his lips.

Fireworks went off as he kissed you and he knew this would be the best summer of his life.

[keruimi]

The Person behind My Passion

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x Reader

Warning: Angst and Comfort

Note: I wrote this while I was watching an amv about him. Titled: [AMV] Tsukishima Kei - Pride. It inspired me to write this for a better imagination. I suggest you watch it. My first Haikyuu oneshot so enjoy!!!

_____________________________

"I'm quitting"

Those were the words I let out in front of the volleyball team in my second year of high school.

For the reason...

Of not being happy at this place anymore.

"Tsukki! Are you crazy?!" I heard Yamaguchi the moment I stepped out of the gymnasium with my belongings as I didn't bother looking back anymore.

"Tsukki!" I kept hearing him calling for my name until I felt my ears block any sounds from my surroundings.

Until I finally felt the strange throb in my chest.

Right...

I don't love volleyball. Because it's one of the reasons for my  trust issues. The reason why someone lied to me.

But right now... I'm asking why I gave it another chance.

A second chance to dedicate myself to it again.

Volleyball was my hobby before, until it became my passion the moment I proved myself worthy to be a player in the court.

All of it started, because of one lady that caught my interest.

"I want to see you in court. In the volleyball court"

That was her first request from me. The request that made her close to me.

The sport that helped me build my relationship with her.

The game that made me see the happiest moment of her life. The plays that made her my proudest fan.

I felt a tear slide from my cheek.

The game that made her love me deeper, but was never enough to make her stay at all.

Fuck...

I feel like I'm losing myself

~•°•~

"I don't believe that Tsukki would quit like that so easily!" I shouted in frustration towards my fellow members as I held back my tears.

I will make sure he stays.

After all, I believe he started to love volleyball again.

"Yamaguchi"

"Tsukki" I felt myself start as I properly stood up. "He's the type of person to love something the moment he starts to be happy with it"

"I don't dare believe he would leave wholeheartedly"

"Why are you leaving?! I thought you began to love it again?" I managed to catch up to him when he halted from his steps.

I grabbed his uniform and made him turn to look at me but I stopped when I saw how he gazed at me.

It feels so foreign to me.

"What's wrong Tsukki"

"Please tell me"

Silence settled around us as I fisted my hands when those seconds turned minutes.

"Tsukki!"

"I have no reason to stay"

"Because she was the reason I played"

"I will make sure to bring him back"

~•°•~

Why did we end up in this way?

A man who once stood beside her, can just silently linger his gaze on her.

I look away with that thought as I put my headphones on my ears to block the voices of the people around me.

I hate how my heart can't stop aching.

Where did it go wrong?

Where did I go wrong?

I hate when I feel like I am the one who lost everything.

When she was the first one to love me.

"How was it?" She asked me as I lent her my jacket before we started walking back home.

"It was fine" I told her as I heard her hum happily that moved my heart a little.

"I am so happy you got accepted. Rest assured, you would always see me in your games" she declared wholeheartedly as I nod, going along with her words.

Silence surrounds both of us when she notices I kept my mouth shut.

I just stopped walking when I didn't hear her next footsteps. I looked back and saw how she stayed still in her place while looking at the sky above us.

"I love you because you play volleyball..." She whispered before she lowered her head for our eyes to meet each other.

"But I didn't know seeing you play again would be one of the memories I choose to cherish." She chuckled before she went closer until she stopped in front of me.

"You really made me happier, Kei"

The woman who made my heart skip a bit, would be the same person to break me into pieces.

She started everything...

But she was also the same woman who left me with nothing...

I felt someone stood beside me that made me glance at them and saw her.

I didn't bother talking as I stood up to leave.

"I heard you quit"

Those were her first words that made me scoff.

"That's right" I told her as I fix my things as the class reaches its end.

"Why" I didn't fail to notice how her voice turned to whispers that made me scoff.

It is not obvious?

"Why did you leave?"

That I only played volleyball for her.

"Because I chose to"

"Kei" she called out when I answered her as I zipped my bag close.

"You made me hate it" I honestly admit to her as I saw how her eyes widened a little.

"I never wanted to play that sport again until you came into my life. A woman who reminded me how I loved volleyball back then" I looked back at her.

"I hate myself for giving it another chance" I continued as I properly faced her.

"Just because of one woman"

She stayed still facing me as I saw her contemplate whether to say the words she was thinking or stay silent.

"Tell me what you wanted to tell me" I sighed as I let my hands fall to the side.

"Does Kei hate me?"

I looked down on her who chose to not look at me as I felt my chest tightening.

"I hate you so badly"

Because I started to love you truly.

"You love volleyball" I started before I gazed on the window behind her to see how the sun started to set.

"But it was just a club for me" I muttered. "I have no reason to keep going for it"

"I'm sorry"

I heard her but I was so numb that her apology felt so empty.

It felt nothing...

I felt myself leave the room as I let my feet and took me to where it decided to guide me.

And I saw myself staring at the open gym doors of the volleyball court.

Great...

I felt myself getting suffocated when all of the feelings I felt in this gymnasium went back to me.

When can I have peace of mind?

Why is everything blurry in my mind?

These are the times I need to keep my cool.

But I felt my cold barrier broke when Nishinoya was the one who stood in front of me.

He silently stared at me before he sat on the bench near the gymnasium while I stayed still in my spot because I got caught.

I wonder what his next words will be...

"Right now, I'm going to blame your impulsive thoughts when you decide to quit the team" he stated with his arms crossed while I saw him look ahead the moment I turned to face him.

"You get the recognition you wanted. A great player you wanted to be. Why did you quit?" He looked up to me and I felt how serious he is on this entire ordeal I started.

"I can't play like how I used to be" I admitted as I leaned on the wall near me.

"I feel like I can't keep my focus back on the game"

That was the truth. Because volleyball reminded me of her.

Now we broke up, it feels like I will lose my entire focus. Since I dedicated the game to her.

"It will be too much for me"

I don't want to drag the whole team because of my heartbreak.

He kept silent that made me close my eyes to cherish the small sounds of balls hitting the floor and the squeaking of the player's shoes.

The sounds that I got accustomed to.

"Do you love volleyball?"

"I don't know" I answered without a second thought. "But.."

"I did love the moment that everyone cheered for me. It was those moments I thought I would never experience"

"Volleyball..."

Was everything for me, like she was to me.

"I love volleyball because I am good at it. And I found the friends I needed" I heard him that made me open my eyes to gaze at his back.

"If that one reason left, find another reason to stay" he stood up from his seat before looking back at me with a smile.

"After all... You began to love volleyball too"

I let him walk past me as the blank color of my mind finally started to fill with thoughts.

His words made me realize. I found the things I love because of volleyball.

I look at my hands that I used to receive the spike of players.

I somehow need to learn how to play with a heavy heart.

It's been three weeks since I finally decided to approach Takeda-sensei to give back the form he returned to me the moment I declared on leaving.

That moment, it felt like everything went back to their own places.

I was glad that the team welcomed me back without side remarks. The things I would usually do if someone is in my shoes.

But that time, I learned to put my happiness in volleyball.

I went back to my usual routine after getting the hang of the break up.

Everything is going as it should be, until I saw her in the library.

She was laying her head in a table as her close eyes captured my attention.

Somewhere deep within me, I wish everything would go back to the way it was before.

Everything...including our relationship.

I remove my eyes from her as I decide to walk to another aisle until I hear her tiredly call for my name that made me halt from my steps.

I looked back and thought she was just sleep talking but I changed my mind when I saw her sit properly while rubbing her eyes.

"You're finally here"

Her words made my mind blank as I looked at her with no emotions.

Do we still need to talk?

"Can we please talk?"

I felt my heart start to feel heavy again as I frown in annoyance because of these feelings.

I still can't get over her.

"Let me get this straight. I don't want you calling for me anymore. You and I are nothing but strangers"

"I'm sorry" she cut me off that made me prevent myself from frowning harder.

"I know. You already told me that"

"Fear took over me" she muttered as she slowly blinked her tears away. "Because you became someone so great, I feel like I'm not deserving of you"

"I felt like you would get tired of me. I thought I could get used to your dismissive character. But it scared me" she didn't give me a chance to cut her off so I finally chose to stay silent.

"I thought I could careless what you think of me, but I didn't know I cared about your words so deeply" she wiped her tears before looking back at me.

"I was afraid I will become no one the moment you reach something bigger. Our future turned blurry the moment your status to the public changes."

"You change to someone better while I am still the same" she sobbed out.

"Until it felt like I don't belong in your world anymore"

~•°•~

"I hate this"

I suddenly started as I heard Yamaguchi let out a small sigh in confusion as I scoffed.

My mind was jumbled again. Just because I met her.

The world keeps testing my patience.

"She apologized to me. She told me the reasons I decided to not seek anymore" I told him as I decided to be the one to stop walking so I can talk to him properly.

"Right now, is it acceptable to just leave or give another chance that will surely break me"

I saw him lift a small smile to me before shaking his head.

"Y/n..." He called out for his name before sitting down on the sidewalk that was in front of me.

"She was the type of person to be happy at small things. But small things can also hurt her easily"

He looked up to me with a small smile.

"Everyone is deserving of a second chance, Tsukki. It was a chance where you could correct all the wrong things." He stated as he sigh before looking at the moon above us.

"Don't deprive her of it. Since you also didn't give her the assurance she needed." He stated truthfully before standing up to face me.

"You should see the slight changes. Especially when you love a woman whose love language is words of affirmation" he chuckled before patting my shoulder.

"Another chance for both of you"

"For a peaceful life"

Those were the times I was thankful that I have Yamaguchi in my life.

Now, the woman who once broke me, was the one who I also decided to embrace.

The moment feels so right.

That I decided to just forget our past and focus on the new relationship we both have.

The person who proves to me that second chance is not always bad.

Sometimes, it is also given to us to correct the mistakes we both had.

Because of her...

Second chances feel so right...

[esmedelacroix]

10 days til' Christmas

figureskater!reader and hockeyplayer!gojo satoru's complicated relationship ⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅̩̩͙‧͙ ‧͙̩̩͙❆ ͙͛ ˚₊⋆

cw: miscommunication trope(Im sorry i know its annoying but like just read)

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Blue robin eggs, the sky, ice, oceans, jeans, pools, Uranus, smithsonite, opal, moonstones, and waterfalls. A list of all the things that are blue that could never do me any harm. But his eyes, they captivate they attract then they destroy and demolish.

On multiple occasions, I have been called the best figure skater of my time. I have broken records in multiple countries for the most turns, the first triple axel landed, first this and that. It felt good. Hell, it felt great.

But the truth is, I am a nervous wreck. Spinning is my specialty I do it so well and no one knows how. They say it seems like I never get dizzy.

But there is one thing I need that is always there to help me do what I do. Any dancer knows that the key to a good round of spins is a spot. Something you can focus on and keep looking at repeatedly so that you don't get dizzy.

When I spin I look for blue. Calming and beautiful but harsh and unpredictable. I look for him. Those eyes scream at me for attention. I turn so well because when I look away, my body forces me to look right back. But I could never tell him that. He hates me.

. . .

I'm the best hockey player because I practice more than the average player. I am the best because I worked too hard not to be. It is not an opinion it is fact. Most coaches will tell you that teamwork is key and I agree 100%. But, they lie when they say one singular person can't beat a full team of players because I can. That's—how good I am.

I stopped playing hockey because I loved it, years ago. I probably fell out of love with the sport when I was like 13. Now I play hockey because I love someone.

She's always there. Before I hit the ice she's out there destroying it while looking the most beautiful. We hockey players always complain about the figure skaters ruining our ice before we practice but truthfully I don't mind that she's the one ruining it. I wouldn't even mind if she ruined me.

She's already done a lot of damage to me, why not just finish me off and kill all my hopes of ever being in love again. I don't have to be in the rink two hours before practice and go over 'game strategies' when I'm really watching her skate. But I do it anyway because she has a way of pulling me in and then pushing me out. I love it.

I love her. I love seeing her. I love every second I'm in the same rink as her. I love how my mind plays games with me and tricks me into thinking that when she spins she looking straight into my eyes. Because I would rather think that than think about how much she hates me.

. . .

"Darling, you won't know if you don't try," your mom urged.

You let out a long sigh and just got into the car. Your mom was a figure skater on her way to stardom before she tore her ACL and could never compete again.

Anyone who didn't know you and your mom's relationship would assume she was trying to live vicariously through you. Truthfully she was against you doing figure skating, after you decided you wanted to follow in her footsteps and figure skate as well.

You had watched a recording of her last competition. She did pair skating and she was in a last-leg competition to compete for Team USA in the Olympics. When she did her throw triple axel it looked beautiful in the air and the landing was swift. But she started making pained faces and soon enough she fell and couldn’t move her leg.

She had attempted to skate through an injury to her ACL and in the 30 seconds she skated after tearing it, she did irreversible damage to her leg. She was used to performing through pain but she said she had never felt such pain in her whole life. That's what made you want to start skating. The fact that your mother was so devoted to her sport that she could skate through one of the most painful injuries. That sparked your interest, you believed skating could make you strong. And it did but it also made you love.

You were hesitant to go to the figure skating lessons that you begged your parents to take you to because you were nervous. You loved to skate but you couldn't shake the feeling of prying eyes on you when you spun.

Since you were six years old you would go to the rink an hour earlier and practice until you got it right. The hockey boys usually had their practices after yours. So they waited to practice while watching you skate.

You had private lessons ever since you started making a multitude of qualifiers when you were in middle school. So, some of the hockey boys would be going over their game plans while you skated alone and some would just watch.

They didn't like you. Or one of them especially didn't like you. Gojo Satoru. Only the hottest guy in junior year. You had made enemies with him when the two of you were a lot younger. It didn't help that your parents were the best of friends and thought the two of you were close.

Every day you prayed the incident was just a dream and you were going to wake up and go to practice and maybe bump into Gojo and meet him again for the first time under better circumstances.

. . .

You were extremely late for your lessons. You had gone from your middle school promotional courses to tutoring then straight to the rink, no rest. You were running on three hours of sleep as a 13-year-old. As you sprinted down the halls nothing was on your mind but how you were about to apologize to your trainers. The boy's hockey team had a game on the main rink so you had to go to a side rink.

Without looking where you were going immediately slide out to ice. You were deaf and blind to the screaming boys and crowd and the lights shone in your eyes as a member of the opposing team was skating at you with the puck in his possession at full speed.

Wrong rink, wrong time, wrong position. You begged the ice to swallow you and consume you. Your legs were stone and your mind was cluttered. All you could hear was Gojo pleading for you to move out of the way so you wouldn't get hurt while racing towards you.

. . .

The drive to the rink was silent as you let thoughts of how you would possibly make it through practice today run wild. He would be there watching you with those eyes of his.

He had been away for a week at a tournament and you weren't taking it very well. His absence was kryptonite to your performance.

When the blades of your shoes hit the frigid ice you felt his eyes on you. In that moment your body burned like a furnace. No matter how cold his eyes were they had a way of setting you on fire.

The smell of dirty hockey equipment invaded your nose then all your senses. You took position and as your music started you allowed it to carry you across the ice. Once it was time for you to turn you hit every. Single. One. Your spot was blue. Your spot was him. It was good he was back.

Once your piece ended you received some applause from your coaches and some of the hockey boys. All the praise was worth nothing because you could have sworn he was watching you. So when you looked at him to see his arms crossed and gaze directed somewhere else, your heart sunk a little. He was completely unbothered by you, and you hated it.

. . .

I was afraid that if I looked at her after her beautiful performance I might’ve cried. She made her new choreography look unreal. I hadn't seen her in what felt like a lifetime. I missed our little glances that I would always hallucinate were longing, knowing glances.

I missed the 40 seconds in passing that we would talk to each other as I got on the ice and she left the ice. I missed the dinners that our parents would force us to have together. Where we would have a civil conversation 'for our parents' sakes'(I truthfully looked forward to those dinners).

I looked forward to the hug I would give her. My arms wrapped around her cold body. My hands would graze her smaller cold ones. She would be fresh out of the shower after an evening session, and her hair would smell like her fruity shampoo and her sweet honey-scented conditioner. When she walked by me quick enough, the smells would waft and invade my nose and numb my senses.

Even when I looked away from her trying not to look in her direction, my mind wouldn't shut up about her.

. . .

I hated how his lack of attention towards me bothered me so much. I hated how no matter how hard I tried, I could never hate him as much as he probably hated me. Today would be different. You wouldn't bother him today. As you skated off the ice you ignored him and skated right off. It took everything in you not to look back at him.

. . .

You stood unable to move as if your skates were frozen into the ice. Then everything went completely dark and all you could hear was the screams of your parents. You felt someone pushing you to the ground then everything went black.

. . .

next part → 8 days til' christmas

----------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist:

@aripet22

[casiia]

sports i think the sully's (+) would play!

supa dupa unedited!

jake sully: definitely a football man, he forces the entire family to watch the super bowl with him and screams SO loud when his team loses. i can imagine he wanted a son so they could play together, do the cliche 'teaching my son how to throw a football' thing. jake also host family football in his backyard when his friend's come over, he has tonowari as the other team captain and forces the kids to play, making them line up so the dads can make their team.

"lo'ak- no! you have to play"

neytiri: i don't know why but she definitely plays tennis, like in my head it just makes sense. y'know when in tennis matches all you can hear are the competitors grunting while they hit the ball super hard, that's her. neytiri is basically serena williams. she has a custom made racket and her outfits change for every game she plays, her visor is blue most of the time because tuk insist the sun will reflect off the color and she will be able to see the entire time (she heard the sky is blue because it reflects off of the ocean and she just ran with it).

"tuk, you're right! the blue kept the sun out of my eyes"

neteyam: jake most definitely tried to convince neteyam to play football, "it's fun i promise" "follow in my footsteps" let's just say the countless hours of them throwing a football outside bored neteyam to death. so instead, i feel like he would play hockey. it's kinda the same concept...right? like they are both very big contact sports, ramming each other into the walls of the skating rink to get to the puck, tripping your opponents with a hockey stick making them fall into the hard ice. i assume neteyam would use it as an out to release pent up anger and aggression he holds as the oldest son, it's definitely not healthy, but it's better than nothing AND he's good at what he does so it's a win win situation.

"what, in the penalty box again? i didn't push him, i tripped. not my fault he fell so hard."

lo'ak: LO'AK! i already know he plays basketball, he wears the nike techs and everything. very big lakers fan, like i want to say his whole room is a bright purple and yellow and every night before he goes to bed he blows a kiss to kobe. he's obnoxious and knows he's better than most people, so he'll just take the ball every chance he gets and shoots. it's always great but if he does it in a close game and he misses, he will prob be benched for the rest of the quarter. he begs neytiri and jake to get neon bright basketball shoes that are super expensive because 'the brigther the shoe the better the athlete' and after years of begging, he finally gets the bright orange (ugly) shoes he's been wanting. if he sees tsireya in the crowd he points at her and says "this one's for you", completely airballs and gets yelled at by his coach..

"i'm not cocky, i just know i'm good"

kiri: uhm. kiri doesn't play a sport, she's very much the musician of the family. but if i really had to chose i think she would be good at,, ice skating?! or dance in general, again i have no idea. but let's say ice skating, she carpools with neteyam because they go to the same ice rink and the entire time it's just gossip. she's very stubborn and has to perfect the trick she does before moving onto the next one. i'm guessing that she experiences a big mental block, like she can't do spins or jumps anymore because she's afraid to fall on the ice and hurt herself; that's why she quit. she does miss the beauty of the sport but finds herself in tune with music.

"you know what elsa said, the cold never bothered me anyway"

tuk: SHE IS A GYMNAST! she's one of those annoying little girls who do cartwheels everywhere to show off. her leotards are all glittery and multicolored, she has to look her best for the judges. neytiri and jake absolutely eat it up, they make the entire family watch her beam routine once she successfully does it without falling off. when jake takes her to skyzone to practice her flips, he ends up getting stuck in the foam pit and has to have workers help pull him out. then he lost tuk. but aside from that, tuk is very hardworking and committed, she wants to be an olympian and if she's good at 8, imagine how good she will be when she's older. neytiri loves the time that they spend picking her outfits out or when she has to squeeze her little girl's hair into a bun. the memories they make in those 5 minutes keep tuk motivated, she no longer cries when she falls, she laughs that she did and gets up to do it again.

"MOM! TOO TIGHT MY HAIR IS GONNA RIP OUT MY HEAD!"

tonowari: hmm. i think waterpolo! saying this because he's metkayina but also one beefy man. he moves well in the water and is the fastest on his team, sososo very humble though. if someone scratches him or pulls him under water, he will try to drown the guy. ( sorry it's this short i know nothing about waterpolo)

"i didn't even do that, pshh you can't see anything it was underwater"

ronal: swimming?? i think maybe swim team or synchronized swimming. yes yes synchro swimming! she likes dancing of course but dancing underwater it just so much more peaceful to her. she is super close to her team and gets to pick out the music for each choreograph much to everyone's dismay.

"this is not old people music! it's good for the soul"

ao'nung: baseball player. 2 million percent a baseball player. he's a pitcher and always teases the person batting before throwing a curveball. if he gets caught he gets scolded but never benches because he's too good and they need him (gag). very very cocky boy, will never admit he's done something wrong and that causes the whole team to run. i can also see him annoyingly eating sunflower seeds and spitting the shell out between every word, no manners smh.

"huh- pft- no- pft- i- pft- didn't- pft- say- pft-" "AO'NUNG!"

tsireya: sweet baby is a cheerleader. she's a flyer and puts her entire trust in her spotters, they will never ever drop her. she loves to do very bold cheer makeup and color coordinates her outfits, her smile soso big as she waves to the bleachers with a pompom in hand. there are mean cheerleaders and she's always one of the girls to scold them "we are a team, weather you like it or not." she's at the top of the pyramid in everyone's hearts.

"yes i can do makeup on you tuk, is it scary being thrown? of course not, they will always catch me"

[steffani-milligan]

Sorry guys. I don't have any ideas for posts, so here's what I have at the moment "T-T

Name: Bobby Bearhug

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Pansexual

Pronouns: She/Her

~Dop Info~

♥️- A kind and caring soul showing compassion for everyone and for everything

♥️- She loves hugging and giving love to her friends

♥️- Sometimes she is nalve, because she can take care of someone who, deep down, does not have the best intentions

♥️- She loves honey, cooking, flowers and drawing hearts

♥️- Loves Valentine's Day

♥️- Autophobia

♥️- She keeps her own personal diary and sometimes writes fan fiction

♥️- Pink and red are her favorite colors

Name: DogDay

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Pansexual & Omnisexual

Pronouns: He/Him

~Dop Info~

☀️- A cheerful, strong and determined leader of our critters

☀️- He always looks on the bright side of things and encourages others in difficult times

☀️- He doesn't like it when his friends are sad, and especially when they cry, so he tries his best to comfort and calm them down

☀️- He likes jokes and laughs even if he didn't understand them

☀️- Ancraophobia

☀️- Very tickling

☀️- He likes to draw and play with the ball and his friends

Name: KickinChicken

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Pansexual & Bisexual

Pronouns: He/Him

~Dop Info~

⭐ - He likes to wear cool sunglasses even at night if he wants to, and if anyone asks him why he does it, he will say that: "I look even cooler in my cool sunglasses"

⭐- He likes surfing because he thinks it's cool. he also loves dancing and sports

⭐ - Tendencies to fear

⭐ - He knows how to skateboard and knows a little karate

⭐ - He loves to do some extreme things, jokes, pranks and so on

⭐ - Loves sports

⭐ - He can't fly, but he can swim

⭐- He has a strong sense of determination, as he will calmly come out of any tense situation that will bring him to his knees

⭐- He likes to present himself as a "cool kid" in front of others. he highly appreciates this idea of himself, so he maintains his image in everything he does

Name: Hoppy Hopscotch

Gender: Demi-girl

Sexuality: Pansexual

Pronouns: She/Her

~Dop Info~

⚡- Supports energy and enthusiasm

⚡- It happens that she can be very hyperactive, which is why she can accidentally break something or harm herself

⚡- Sometimes she is loud and impatient

⚡- ADHD

⚡- She loves sports and vegetables very much

⚡- She is not afraid to take risks and always strives for her goal

⚡- Her favorite game is volleyball and football

⚡- She can jump rope

Name: CraftyCorn

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Omnisexual

Pronouns: She/Her

~Dop Info~

🌈- A conscious observer of both color and creativity in the world

🌈- She can see beauty in everything that is imagined and shaped

🌈- She loves to draw and create

🌈- She likes rainbows, flowers and bright colors

🌈- Sky blue is her favorite color

🌈- Likes to make himself different hairstyles

🌈- She makes not only a good artist, but also a hairdresser

🌈- Too shy, but a little sensitive and touchy. Also a very hardworking and creative person

Name: Bubba Bubbaphant

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Asexual & Bisexual

Pronouns: He/Him

~Dop Info~

💡- He supports his friends and always encourages them to make smart choices

💡- Very smart in a gang with a high IQ

💡- He likes to read, learn and learn something new and mathematics

💡- Not ticklish

💡- Inquisitive and attentive. He always knows when someone is lying

💡- Sometimes he may forget to rest or sleep when he gets carried away in reading

💡- He often visits the library

Name: CatNap

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Demisexual & Bisexual

Pronouns: He/Him

~Dop Info~

🌙- Ensures that he and his friends can always get enough sleep to start the morning game

🌙- He is silent most of the day and does not like to talk too much

🌙- He likes to look at his sleeping friends. It makes him happy and relaxed

🌙- Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS)

🌙- Frequent insomnia

🌙- Loves the night and watching the stars

🌙- A little introverted

🌙- He is a gentle and affectionate cat, but sometimes quite cunning

🌙- He always chases a laser pointer because of his feline instincts, even though it annoys him

Name: Picky Piggy

Gender: Demi-girl

Sexuality: Asexual & Bisexual

Pronouns: She/Her

~Dop Info~

🍎- She knows how to cook and loves to eat delicious food

🍎- She likes to work on the farm and grow vegetables and fruits

🍎- Gets dirty a lot

🍎- Likes to help and doesn't like too much attention

🍎- A little introverted

🍎- Pretty strong and hardworking

[astonmartinii]

signed up for life | lewis hamilton social media au

pairing: lewis hamilton x signlanguageinterpretator!reader

f1 finally introduces a sign language interpretor to their media team

yourusername

liked by lewishamilton, danielricciardo and 110,951 others

yourusername: ahhhh such a dream come true, my first f1 weekend was an absolute dream and to be able to represent the deaf community on such a big platform was such a pleasure - here's to many more and to normalising sign language on major sports broadcasts !!

view all comments

user1: f1 may be going backwards in terms of fia tomfoolery but i'm super happy to see some good progress

user2: why isn't sign language compulsory in schools? seeing y/n has defo inspired me to start learning

lewishamilton: you're such an inspiration and a great addition to the paddock

yourusername: thank you lewis and thank you for the warm welcome <3

user3: f1 finally stepping up the representation game

user4: i was living for the sass in her signing i can't wait to watch her sign the inevitable domestic between toto and christian

charles_leclerc: welcome to the paddock y/n!

yourusername: thank you charles :)

user5: i ship it already

user6: take a day off already lord she's been there one weekend and you're already minimising her to a driver she could date

f1

liked by lewishamilton, yourusername and 1,204,871 others

tagged: yourusername

f1: how did you guys enjoy y/n y/ln's sky sports debut this weekend? y/n will be on the broadcast team this season as their sign language interpreter!

view all comments

user10: she killed it i love her already

user11: the signing was a slay but can we also talk about how she's slaying the fashion game?

user12: finally lewis has some good competition

lewishamilton liked this comment

alexalbon: welcome y/n !! thank you for the extra help with the hard of hearing fans on friday

user13: huh?

user14: oh a girl on twitter has a thread about this, she's hard of hearing and y/n stopped and acted as translator for her with all of the drivers going into the paddock

user15: omg i love her even more

lewishamilton: can't wait to start my signing lessons

yourusername: you're lucky you've got the best teacher around

user16: uh HELLO?

yourusername

liked by lewishamilton, lilymunhe and 149,086 others

yourusername: taking advantage of the mini break

view all comments

user17: who told her she could serve this hard?

lilymunhe: gosh i have a crush on you

alexalbon: do i mean nothing to you?

lilymunhe: not compared to her

yourusername: well i am flattered but unfortunately not up for grabs :(

user18: she's not up for grabs ??? we already lost her ???

user19: it's only been like five races who ever it is wasn't messing around

user20: not to be one of those crazy wag conspiracy theorists but the guy in the last slide is defo lewis

lewishamilton: pastries on a boat?

yourusername: idk the guy i was with thought it was a great idea

user21: chatting like it wasn't him they're so shameless

lewishamilton

liked by yourusername, georgerussell63 and 1,023,677 others

lewishamilton: perks to living in monaco

view all comments

user22: oh to be rich...

yourusername: hmmm a baguette on a boat

lewishamilton: idk the girl i was with thought it was a great idea

user23: please stop playing with us

georgerussell63: i see my invite was lost in the post yet again

lewishamilton: i wasn't prepared to hear you complain about thirdwheeling the whole time

georgerussell63: clear solution here... invite carmen and it's a double date?

user24: so they're just gonna be like this and just never confirm whether they're together or not?

charles_leclerc: so this is what my boat was used for ?

lewishamilton: i think i'll keep everything that happened on that boat to myself

charles_leclerc: based on that i don't think i want to know

user25: poor guy, getting fucked by ferrari and lewis fucked y/n on his boat

pierregasly: most action he's seen in a while

user26: charles is just catching so many strays 😭

f1wagupdates

liked by user38, user29 and 2,340 others

tagged: yourusername, lewishamilton

f1wagupdates: y/n y/ln and lewis hamilton have all but confirmed their relationship after they spent the entire summer break together and arrived to the first race back at spa together. lewis even showed how much time they've been spending together by signing during a tiktok filmed for mercedes' account. what do you think of the couple?

view all comments

user39: they're so so cute that's my PADDOCK POWER COUPLE

user40: they are too sexy it should be illegal for them to be so sexy

user41: can't wait for some bitter old men to say that she can't be on the broadcast team cause of "bias"

user42: i need them to stand on me

user43: i think they might actually be the best f1 couple ever soz

yourusername

liked by alexalbon, lewishamilton and 309,778 others

tagged: lewishamilton

yourusername: yeah i guess he won yet another race but we all know his biggest win is off the track

view all comments

user44: mama knows her worth i love her

lewishamilton: never doubt that you're my biggest prize

yourusername: i love youuuuuuuuuu

lewishamilton: leave your meeting and come home please

user45: move over roscoe i'm their dog now anything to be with them

roscoelovescoco: ????

lilymunhe: give me a chance i swear

alexalbon: i regret ever introducing you two

yourusername: oh please albono you love any excuse to hang out with us

lewishamilton: yea i don't hear you complaining on our double dates

user46: lily, y/n, lewis and alex all double date ???? kill me.

lewishamilton

liked by georgerussell63, yourusername and 1,340,887 others

tagged: yourusername

lewishamilton: getting to the end of the season and the hard work is paying off. we keep pushing until the end but always remember to take time to be with the ones you love

view all comments

user47: only this man could make a race win post so sappy

yourusername: proud of you baby

lewishamilton: i love you

user48: the fact that lewis is so good at signing now he could do most of his post race interview in bsl (though he still needs y/n there for reassurance)

user49: i was there and interlagos had a mainstage activity of y/n teaching basic sign language I LOVED IT

mercedesamgf1: let's go lewis 💪

roscoelovescoco: lets goooooooo dads

user50: guys i worked out that sign we always see lewis and y/n do to each other that's not on any of dictionaries i've looked at - it's their sign names and saying they love each other

user51: they're so fucking cheesy but i love them

mercedesamgf1

liked by yourusername, f1 and 1,679,045 others

tagged: lewishamilton

mercedesamgf1: LEWIS HAMILTON IS FINALLY AN EIGHT TIME CHAMPION OF THE WORLD 🏆

view all comments

user52: OMFG IT FINALLY HAPPENED I NEEDED THIS SO MCUH

yourusername: speechless honestly

lewishamilton: really? cause all i heard was screaming on the broadcast

yourusername: FALSE I WAS PROFESSIONAL

user53: the way i knew he would win but i don't know what to do with myself now it has happened?

roscoelovescoco: congrats dad !!!!

georgerussell63: mega season from lewis 🏆 we go again next season 💪

lewishamilton: thank you george, your time will come

user54: the kiss... parents for real

yourusername

liked by georgerussell63, lewishamilton and 901,347 others

tagged: lewishamilton

yourusername: this season has been a rollercoaster but two things have stood out to me. 1. i met the love of my life and the man i will be with for the rest of my life and was able to watch the man i love make history and i couldn't be prouder. 2. i got to represent my community on one of the biggest platforms ever and inspire people to pick up the beautiful language of sign language which is the most rewarding part of my job!! thank you so much for this opportunity, the love and for taking the journey into sign language, we welcome you xx

view all comments

user53: no i love you so much and your addition to f1 is invaluable

user54: you guys are so cute and so inspiring, really god's favourites

lewishamilton: i love you so much, thank you for your love and support and for introducing me to this beautiful language

yourusername: you're such an inspiration to me baby, you're a record holder and the holder of my heart

landonorris: lord i might throw up

yourusernme: if you're not here to congratulate STFU

landonorris: my bad, congrats (you guys are so grossly in love)

user55: they're so parents it's now illegal for them to divorce

f1: thank you for educating us, we'll see you next season !

note: hope y'all enjoy, i'm partially deaf in both ears and am currently learning BSL to feel closer to my community and had this idea. i wish this was an actual position in f1 but hopefully in the future xx

[baronessvonglitter]

Questions tag game!

merci beaucoup to @strang3lov3 for the tag!

Do you make your bed? Yes. Not always right after I get up, but definitely before I start whatever's on the agenda for the day.

Favorite number? I don't have one. I prefer letters over numbers.

What's your job? Classified. But the most time I ever spent at a job was at a library for almost 12 years.

If you could go back to school, would you? I waffle about it. But honestly I loved college and I'd definitely go back to further my education.

Can you parallel park? I have only achieved it once, during my driving test, and even then, the state trooper said, "Eh, good enough" So, essentially... no.

Do you think aliens are real? I've seen a couple of UFOs.. I saw a strange set of lights in the sky - four red lights perfectly parallel to one another, and then they vanished. Another time before that, I was watching the sky and saw a slow-moving dot of light. I figured it was a plane until it seemed to jump into hyperspace and zoomed upward, out of sight.

Can you drive a manual car? Listen, I like relaxing while I'm driving. If I have to worry about shifting gears and other nonsense, I'm not doing it. Automatic all the way, baby, zooming down the freeway at a whopping 50 miles per hour while blasting Duran Duran.

What's your guilty pleasure? I don't feel guilty about the things that bring me pleasure. But there are pleasures that I don't talk about often, and my main one is when fights break out between major league baseball teams. It just does something for me.

Tattoos? None (yet). I have a fear of needles. Also, I can't commit to the same nail polish within a day, so I don't want to put something on my body that would be there forever. Although I think it'd be hilarious to get the "Hiya Buddy" hot dog post-it from The Office tattooed on my hip or lower back.

Favorite color? Sunset colors: peach, lavender, magenta, violet. Also dark green, dark red, dark blue.

Do you like puzzles? Jigsaw yes, Sudoku no. Ooh I love crossword puzzles!

Any phobias? A lot. Needles, insects, the dark, probably too many to count. I can proudly flex, however, that I have zero fear of public speaking.

Favorite childhood sport? I was not an athletic child, but I did play tennis in high school and I really loved it. Still play from time to time.

Do you talk to yourself? I'm sure I do, but not often. I usually have TV or music on as background noise.

NPT: @604to647 @ashleyfilm @greenwitchfromthewoods @coolranchdavidian @untamedheart81 @shessweetsour

[dimplesandfierceeyes]

Get to Know Me Tag Game

Guess who's finally round to the games they were tagged in last month... Thank you @dribs_and_drabbles @airenyah @telomeke for tagging me, sorry it's taken me so long...

do you make your bed? 

Yes usually with a gap at the top for my cat who likes to snuggle between the duvet and the pillow 

what's your favourite number?

Hmm 56. It's just got a lot going on.

what is your job?

Teacher… sort of. It's complicated 😂

if you could go back to school, would you?

School as in high school? Probably not. School as in education in general? Probably! I enjoy learning, but it would have to depend on whether it was funded or not 

can you parallel park?

Yes but it's a painful process

a job you had that would surprise people?

My jobs have been pretty standard. The only one that used to get comment was when I worked for a guy who made pub quizzes haha

do you think aliens are real?

I think it's possible that life exists on other planets, yes

can you drive a manual car?

Yes, that's all I've ever driven

what's your guilty pleasure?

If by guilty pleasure, we mean a pleasure most people IRL don't know about then it would be all the BL and GL shows I watch haha. 

tattoos?

Love them on others but never felt the urge for myself

favourite colour?

Depends on my mood

do you like puzzles?

Jigsaw puzzles? Not past the first ten minutes 😂 other types of puzzles? Yes, but I'm not always good at them

any phobias?

Claustrophobia, though it's not a particularly bad case. I just hate feeling trapped.

favourite childhood sport?

I hated sport as a child haha

do you talk to yourself?

Incessantly. Even in public 😂

what movies do you adore?

It's been a while since I was in a film watching mood so this one's tricky for me to answer as I forget anything not immediate in my brain. However, the Peter Jackson director's cut Lord of The Rings movies have a very special place in my heart, even if I can't watch them anymore because I watched them to death as a teenager. 

The Mummy, I still have a soft spot for too and there's a few studio ghibli: Princess Mononoke, Castle in the Sky and Whisper of the Heart come to mind. 

coffee or tea?

Tea though I'll drink coffee too on occasion

first thing you wanted to be growing up?

According to my mother, an accountant…

It's been ages since this one has been around so I'm not sure who's done it or not anymore. Sorry if I tag you when you've already had a go!

@an-asuryampasya @hyeoni-comb @partialtotheperiwinkleblue @dancing-out-in-space @jessiethepotato @pokomumee

[melishade]

Damn it. Number 1?

This ask game

Autobot Anthology. Autobots make an ice skating rink for the winter.

Halloween Movies

Emblem

Lobbing

"Primus, I hate the winter," Arcee groaned, feeling her body jolt in a shiver from the chill of the snowy winds. The Survey Corps and the Autobots were currently residing at the neutral ship. They were trying to conserve energon for the larger ship, but that meant the inside of the ship had to be cold.

"We all do! It sucks!" Sasha yelled as Connie threw some snow in her face.

"We just need to get some extra stuff and we can go back to the walls," Hanji insisted.

"I call riding with Optimus!" Jean raised his hand.

"Bullshit!" Connie and Eren yelled at him.

"What?! He has a heating system! I don't want to get sick!" Jean retorted.

"We have a rotating system!" Eren reminded.

"Well, we need to make sure Optimus is feeling well rested before we return to the walls," Hanji reminded, "If he gets sick, we can't treat him, and we don't want him pushing himself!"

Hanji hollered that last part down the hall, and Optimus finally revealed himself to the others holding an empty energon cube.

"I will properly refuel." The Prime sounded a little annoyed.

"Thank you!" Hanji called out in a faux innocent manner.

Wheeljack exited the deck of the ship, holding some wires in his servos. "Isn't wintertime super popular on Earth?"

"Freezing your ass off is popular thing on Earth?" Levi deadpanned.

"Well no," Arcee explained, "Earth has this famous end of the year celebration called Christmas. Very festive. After that, there's a bunch of other winter sports. Skating was fun. We turned the base into an ice-skating rink."

"Well, that sounds more like a luxury," Mikasa declared, "We just want to survive the winter. The closest thing to fun is just playing in the snow. But nothing festive."

"Huh, maybe that's why you hate winter so much," Wheeljack proclaimed, "You guys aren't making it fun."

"Let's just go back to the Walls," Armin sighed.

"I can take some of you guys back. I have a heating system too," Wheeljack informed.

"Yes!" Connie screamed.

"Please do!" Sasha begged.

Arcee grabbed Wheeljack's arm before the Wrecker left to put the wires in the Jackhammer.

"What's up?" Wheeljack asked her.

"Do you know how to make an ice-skating rink?" Arcee asked.

"No," Wheeljack answered.

"Want to make one?" Arcee asked.

"A little bit nice for you," Wheeljack remarked.

"Honestly, they really need a break," Arcee confessed.

"Fair enough," Wheeljack shrugged, "When do you want to get started?"

==

A few days later

The Survey Corps were stunned at what they were looking at. Optimus had approached them all, proclaiming that Arcee and Wheeljack had requested their presence. When Hanji pressed the Prime on the matter, he looked rather perplexed. He had no clue what Arcee and Wheeljack had planned. They had followed the Prime through the snow, thankfully, no storm was to be had. The sky was as clear as day. When they arrived at the location, they were stunned to see a large elliptical platform of ice surrounded by a wooden railing. The ice was so smooth that they could see their reflection in it.

"Whoa!" the 104th exclaimed in excitement.

"You made it," Arcee spoke up as she walked onto the rink. The Survey Corps watched as she slid towards them with grace before slowly to a stop, almost getting some ice residue on them.

"What is all this?!" Hanji asked with giddy.

"Ice skating rink," Arcee answered, "Humans on Earth use it for fun, and the humans we knew turned the base into a rink one time. I...thought you guys could use the fun, so..."

The two-wheeler gestured to the rink before her. "Surprise."

"That is quite considerate of you," Optimus praised.

"Yep," Arcee replied curtly.

"Is it...safe?" Levi couldn't help but ask as he tapped his foot on the edge of the ice.

"Oh, Wheeljack's been testing it for the past hour," Arcee answered with a shrug.

"YEAH!" Wheeljack screamed as he slid across the ice right behind Arcee. The Survey Corps were surprised to see him, but the two-wheeler didn't bat an optic.

"Should be fine," Arcee finished, "Ice skates are over there."

Arcee pointed to a row of shoes with blades attached to the bottom of them.

"And this is going to be your first time, so the railing will be super important," Arcee proclaimed as she skated backwards to provide more space, "Ready to try it?"

"Yep!" Hanji raced towards the skates and took of their shoes as quickly as possible.

"C'mon!" Armin beckoned Mikasa and Eren to follow him, and the two obliged.

"Let's have a race!" Sasha told the others as she ran to the skates.

"I'll kick your ass!" Jean swore as he and Connie followed.

As the rest of the Survey Corps went to put on the skates, Optimus noticed that Levi was remaining put in his spot.

"Do you not wish to join them?" Optimus asked him.

"Someone needs to make sure to get them to a hospital if they get hurt," Levi answered, the Prime could tell that Levi looked a little tense.

As they finished putting on the skates, the humans stared at the ice rink with apprehension. However, it was Armin who managed to muster up the courage to be on the ice. When Armin stepped on the ice, he yelped as he slipped forward and landed on his butt.

"Ow!" Armin yelled.

"Armin, are you okay?!" Eren called out as he tried to help him up, but he ended up slipping forward and hitting the ice face first.

"HAH!" Jean cackled.

"That's what the railings are for," Arcee spoke as she kneeled down and helped both teens to their feet, "The key to this is balance, similar to the 3D gear. Balance on your heels. Back straight."

Arcee helped the two of them straighten their backs before letting them go. Armin and Eren were relieved to be standing, but...

"How do we move?" Armin asked.

"Keep your balance, and one foot in front of the other," Arcee instructed, "Small steps first. Treat it like you're walking."

Both teens followed Arcee's instructions, taking slow wobbly steps forward. Mikasa was afraid both were going to fall again and rushed onto the ice, but the Ackerman suddenly found herself gliding past the both of them and across the ice.

"How do I stop?!" Mikasa called out with worry.

"Twist your feet to the side! Opposite of the direction you're going!" Arcee called out.

Mikasa did as she was told, turning her feet perpendicular to the direction she was heading, but she still ended up losing her balance and falling onto her side.

"Mikasa!" Eren called out while Sasha was laughing.

"Okay." Hanji placed a hand under their chin before stepping onto the ice, "Balance!" Hanji yelped as they waved their arms around before holding them out to keep their balance. They then started taking small steps while keeping their arms out.

"I'm doing it!" Hanji squealed as they were slowly gliding across the ice.

"I'm just gonna stick to the railing," Connie proclaimed as he grabbed onto the wood before getting on the ice. Connie yelled as his feet kicked erratically before he was able to find his balance. He took small steps, using the railing as a way to get around the rink.

"You mastered the 3D gear. You can do this," Jean psyched himself up before stepping onto the ice. Jean let out of yell as he struggled to find his balance. He ended up bending his knees together and holding his hands out before sliding along the ice, "This is fine."

Sasha scoffed. "Amateurs." The huntress cracked her neck before getting into a sprinting position. She then started running across the ice like it was nothing before skidding to a stop next to Mikasa.

"Hi!" she greeted to the Ackerman still on the floor.

"HOW?!" Eren yelled.

"I lived next to a river I had to walk across when it was frozen to get some game when food was in short supply!" Sasha answered.

"I mean...she's technically doing it right," Arcee admitted, but was still baffled.

"There's no way," Jean deadpanned.

"She's doing it like a hockey player," Arcee explained.

"What the hell is hockey?!" Connie called out.

"Human sport!" Wheeljack called out as he slid across the ice once more.

"Where is he coming from?" Armin asked in confusion.

"I'm more than willing to provide help," Arcee offered.

"Yes, please!" Jean pleaded.

As time passed, Mikasa managed to quickly pick up on skating, gliding across the ice with practical ease. Sasha still took to running across the ice, racing Jean who was just barely managing to glide. Eren and Armin held onto each other for support, refusing to let each other go. Hanji was laughing with delight before they fell once more. Even so they struggled to get back up on their feet to try again. Connie had finally gotten off of the railing and was now getting help from Arcee on how to properly balance himself.

"See, you're getting the hang of it," Arcee complimented Connie as she let go of him and allowed him to balance on his own.

Hanji yelled as they slammed into the wooden railing, but they didn't let the pain bother them as they found themselves face to face with Levi and Optimus. "Levi, come join us on the ice!"

"No thanks." Levi turned it down.

"C'mon! It's fun!" Hanji pleaded.

"Majority of you are falling on your asses," Levi retorted, "I'm surprised no one broke anything yet."

"Does bruising count?" Hanji asked him.

"I'm not doing it," Levi declared, earning a raspberry from Hanji before they pushed themselves backwards on the ice.

"Do you really wish to miss out on this experience?" Optimus asked him.

"I don't see you on the ice," Levi shot back.

"I suppose you are right," Optimus didn't deny that. He still managed to catch glimpses of Wheeljack gliding across the ice in bursts, "Wheeljack."

The Wrecker stopped when he heard the Prime call for him.

"How much weight is the ice able to sustain?" Optimus asked him.

"Enough," Wheeljack answered, "I was able to put the Jackhammer on this thing."

"Very well." Wheeljack was surprised when Optimus stepped over the railing, being mindful of the humans, before standing on the ice.

"YAY!" Hanji cheered as they glided over to Optimus and hugged his pede.

Levi sighed in frustration. "Fuck you, Prime."

"One leg!" Wheeljack shouted as he balanced on one leg across the ice, but he ended up tripping and falling over the edge of the rink and into the snow. Optimus glided over to Wheeljack to assist the Wrecker out of the snow as Levi walked over to the last pair of skates. He forced the pair on before walking over to the ice. He stopped right along the edge and stared at his reflection before stepping onto the surface. Levi kept his hands in his pockets, but he refused to take another step and skate.

"Not even five minutes on the ice, and Mikasa's already mastered it," Jean spoke, both annoyed and amazed at the sight of Mikasa and Sasha racing one another. While Mikasa skated with grace, Sasha skated with more aggression.

"There are a few tricks I could teach you," Arcee offered.

"Like what?" Armin asked.

Arcee didn't reply and merely started to skate around the rink. Arcee started to crisscross her legs as she extended her arms out, skating backwards in a circle. In the next moment, she kicked her legs upward and tucked her arms into her chest, twirling in the air three times before landing on one pede, extending the other one out.

"Okay, we can't do that!" Jean exclaimed as everyone else was clapping at the display.

"I want to do that!" Sasha raised her hand eagerly.

"We'll do the legs first. That's the easier one," Arcee decided.

Levi watched as Arcee was beginning to teach the Survey Corps are few tricks, the humans quickly falling down trying to learn it as a result. Levi grunted when Hanji hugged him from behind before taking his hands and pulling him along the ice. Hanji noticed just how tense the Captain looked, holding onto Hanji as tight as he could.

"You're okay, Captain," Hanji reassured, "I got you."

"...yeah," Levi muttered quietly as he followed Hanji on the ice. Little by little, he let Hanji's hands go before being able to skate on his own. He almost fell a few times, but quickly caught himself before he continued skating. He noticed the way that everyone was having fun and couldn't help but feel...wonder. For the first time trying something like this, it was actually kind of nice.

(Okay. I have to work on #3. Someone asked for #49. Everything else is free game.)

[darthpastry]

Incorrect Quotes of the Kingdom Pt. 3 (ft. FNaF SB)

Vanny: I invited you into the woods because I crave the most dangerous game.

Link and Gregory: *nodding* Knife monopoly.

Vanny: .... I was actually going to hunt you for sport but now I'm interested in whatever knife monopoly is.

--------------------------------------------

Tulin: *Sneaks into house at 2am.*

Teba: *Turns in swivel chair.* "Care to tell me where you were?"

Tulin: I was... uh... with Link!

Link: *Also turns in swivel chair.* "Care to- *Keeps spinning* Teba- I can't stop the chair-

--------------------------------------------

Cassie: When I die I want Gregory to lower me into my grave so he can let me down one last time.

--------------------------------------------

*in an escape room*

Purah: The clock is ticking! We don't have time for this asinine tomfoolery!

Gregory: This unmitigated poppycock?

Link: Extravagant hogwash!

Glamrock Freddy: Okay, stop.

--------------------------------------------

Link:  I'm a firm believer in "if you're going to fail, you might as well fail spectacularly."

--------------------------------------------

Zelda: *Struggling in their one-inch heels* Yeah, I don't think heels are for me.

Link: *Pointing and wearing six-inch heels* WEAK!

--------------------------------------------

Sidon: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?

Link: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies.

Gregory: Forks are Stabbie Grabbies.

Tulin: Socks are Feetie Heaties.

Link: Nightmares are Dreamie Screamies.

Cassie: Stamps are Lickie Stickes.

Riju: You are disappointments.

--------------------------------------------

Purah: *sets down card* Ace of Spades.

Link: *sets down Uno card* +4

Tulin: *sets down Pokémon card* Jolteon, I choose you.

Zelda: *trembling* What are we playing?

--------------------------------------------

TotK NPC 1: Link... how do I begin to describe Link?

Totk NPC 2: Link is flawless.

TotK NPC 3: I hear their hair's insured for 10,000 rupees.

TotK NPC 4: I hear they do car commercials... in Japan.

TotK: NPC 5: One time they punched me in the face... it was awesome.

Link: *eating a kebab and wearing the Cece hat* "Interesting."

--------------------------------------------

Glamrock Freddy: Can I be frank with you guys?

Link: Sure, but I don't see how changing your name is going to help you.

Gregory: Can I still be Gregory?

Link: Shh.... let Frank speak.

--------------------------------------------

Gregory: My old arch enemy.

Roxanne: I thought I was still your arch enemy?

Gregory: I have a life, you know.

--------------------------------------------

Zelda: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you've lost throughout your life.

Roxanne: Self-esteem, I haven't seen you in years!

Vanessa: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Paya: I knew I lost that potential somewhere.

Link: My moral code, is that you?

Zelda: ....

Zelda: I was just going to show you this cool trunk my mom left me but do you guys need a hug?

--------------------------------------------

Glamrock Freddy: What does... 'take out' mean?

Glamrock Chica: Food.

Glamrock Bonnie: Dating.

Roxanne: Murder.

Link: *driving by in a go-kart with Tulin and Gregory, all three wearing 8-bit sunglasses* IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A COWARD.

--------------------------------------------

Zelda: I love murder mysteries!

Link: *trying to impress them* I've been a suspect in at least four murder cases.

--------------------------------------------

Vanessa: *about to leave the house* Don't spend all day watching YouTube, okay?

Gregory: I FORGE MY OWN PATH!!

--------------------------------------------

Link: *to all the champions* You might not know this, but I am a flawed person.

Revali: I do know that.

--------------------------------------------

*right after Link wakes up on the Great Sky Island*

Rauru: Is there something you would like to say, Link?

Link: Oh, there are SEVERAL things I would like to say!

--------------------------------------------

Link: I have a plan.

Rauru: Good! As long as we aren't breaking the law I would love to hear it.

Link: ....

Link: I no longer have a plan.

--------------------------------------------

Ganondorf: Just took a personality test and got an A+

Yunobo: I got an F...

Link: I got 'confused screaming'

Rauru: ... I got INFJ.

--------------------------------------------

Sidon: I'm not so sure you're stakeout material.

Link: I'm a chronic insomniac. I was born for this.

--------------------------------------------

*in another timeline...*

Zelda: You were stabbed. Do you remember anything?

Sonia: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.

Zelda: That wasn't an ambulance. I drove you.

Sonia: But I heard a siren.

Zelda: That was King Rauru.

Rauru: Sorry, I was nervous.

--------------------------------------------

Link: We can't lose because we have this. *Points to chest*

Tulin: We have heart?

Link: What? Heart? No. We have me. I'm going to win this for us.

--------------------------------------------

Link: What type of dog is this?

Rauru: That's a tortoise.

--------------------------------------------

Gregory: How stupid do you think I am?!

Roxanne: You really want an honest answer to that?

--------------------------------------------

Ganondorf: Do you even know what an amulet is?

Link: Of course I do! I eat amulets sometimes. I like ones with cheese and onions!

Zelda: Link, those are omlettes.

Link: Oh. Then I got nothing.

--------------------------------------------

Rauru: Did you just refer to a knife as a... people-opener?

Link: Mayhaps...

Link: Should I not have?

--------------------------------------------

Cassie: *reading a letter*

Gregory: Well, what does it say?

Cassie: It's a confession letter. It turns out Mimic killed my pet rock.

--------------------------------------------

Gregory: The results are in. I'm afraid you have updog.

Riju: What's updog?

Gregory: Tulin, Link, get in here! I told you I could do it!

--------------------------------------------

Gregory: Never gonna make you cry!

Tulin: Never gonna say goodbye!

Link: Never gonna tell a lie-

Roxanne: I will hurt you.

--------------------------------------------

Link: My pockets jingle with stolen buttons from Hot Topic. I literally cannot stop stealing those buttons. I don't feel like paying three dollars for a piece of tin with pusheen on it, but I do feel like a heist.

Ganondorf: This feels like the kind of thing you overhear when the person next to you on the bus is having a very heated phone call.

--------------------------------------------

Tulin: A spoon is just a small bowl on a stick that you use to eat from a larger bowl.

Riju: Why do you say these things?

--------------------------------------------

Sonia: Does anyone have any sunscreen?

Link: No, I don't like the way it tastes.

Rauru: Wait, you eat sunscreen?

Link: No, why would I eat it if I don't like the way it tastes?

--------------------------------------------

Link: I'm bored.

Gregory: Wanna start chaos for no reason?

Link: I thought you'd never ask.