#i didnt for years but i was also extremely depressed so

[ganondoodle]

so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-

but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again

(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)

i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)

weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward

but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.

right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)

[genekies]

screaming in the club

time for another vent in tags

[lycanthian]

explosion.gif

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

[the-amber-droid-dreams]

[ID: A priest in a confession booth looking shocked]

[littletrumpetcat]

learning some unfortunate realities tonight

[yongseungkim]

.

[swampdrive]

Went to lunch w/ my coworkers on Friday and good god did it reinforce that i need to go to therapy again soon dhdbdjdn

[scarlettfevor]

I've passed the 80th episode and I was wondering why the series was going by so quick because I remember this part of the plot dragging a bit, and then I realized it was because I watched mcd when it was first coming out so I had to actually wait for each episode. Ah, nostalgia

How it feels to watch minecraft diaries as a 21 year old woman

[doe-core]

INFODUMPING ABOUT JOHN DOE<3

Regular guys are fully grown and were never children

His species is a regular guy (hair ball)

He likes burgers

He doesn’t like sweet things, but would eat anything you made him

He prefers bitter stuff

His favorite snack is teeth

His likes include you, teeth, eyes, baby rats, television, and static

His dislikes are under stimulation, being alone, “That Guy”, You ignoring him, and baths

He is afraid of water (reason being that regular guys have to swim through large bodies of water in order to escape the motherball which causes a fear of water in a lot of regular guys)

Doe nearly drowned in the river when escaping the motherball, which is why he’s afraid of water

Regular guys don’t need to take baths. If their fake body needs to be cleaned, they will simply eat it and reform it again!!

His fake body will melt if it touches water, but his actual body (hair ball) won’t die, it will just be very painful and traumatic

He feels through his hair which means that he doesn’t like combing his hair, tieing it up, and cutting his hair is the equivalent to cutting off limb

He has many teeth

He has the power to manipulate reality and get “You” to say and do anything he wants, as shown in ending 4 “Yes”

He is gender-fluid, bisexual and goes by any pronouns. “His gender is just as mysterious as he is!!”

He has no organs or bones, but he can create them if you wish!

He eats materials to make up his fake body. Harder materials lead to a harder form, as softer materials make his body softer. His form also can freeze in extreme cold and melt in extreme heat

He is around 20-40 years old (Regular guys are already grown when made)

Regular guys produce asexually

They are classified as pests due to how fast they spread

Doe’s IQ is slightly higher than the average in uncanny valley, but slightly lower in the human realm

Doe’s scars are not due to him being “sad”, they are a kink/reminder

The reason he can feel is because strands of hair are spread throughout his body

His hairball form is 2 ft tall

Cartoon physics apply to him and he is described to move like a claymation figure

His voice claim is Weird Al and Fox (the creator) stated that “his voice sounds like when someone is talking to you in a dream and you forget how it sounded”

He states that creating 2 eyes is difficult and it can cause him to have blurred vision, but “he will do it if you think it will make him perfect”

Even though he is a sexually active adult, that is not his main goal. He strives for genuine connections and affection

His shirt changes based on how he’s feeling and it can say words or have pictures!

He doesn’t have pain receptors, so he didnt know that stabbing you in ending 2 would hurt you

He slightly pefers taller and bigger partners because it makes him feel protected, but he will love you no matter what!! He will love you no matter what body type you are!!

He leaves you a gift no matter the ending (ex. even when doe loses interest in ending 3, he still leaves you a parting gift)

He is a sadistic masochist

His interest increases when you choose to not take a shower (he prefers your natural scent)

He also likes to scare you because “you’re cute when you’re scared” :3

If you were to kiss him, he would be very happy and his reality will reflect that!!

Everything about you is appealing to him. EVERYTHING. When he is in love, it is HARD to make him fall out of love, but if you are firm enough with him, he will eventually take the hint.

Doe is a hoarder and is hinted to be very messy. If you had baked him something, (ex. cake, cookies, etc.) he would ether eat it, or keep it in his endless pile of shit <3

Speaking of which, he will most likely lose you in his house :p

He’s not rlly good with comforting people with depression, but he will try his best!! He will give you all the reassurance you need by giving you “gifts”,(i use that word very lightly) affection, and watching tv with you!!

He repeats words to emphasize how he’s feeling!! (ex. “I just love love love you!!”)

He loves the feeling of static from when you lick vintage television (whatever the fuck that means 😭)

Though, he doesn’t need to blink and only blinks when he wants to, when he does blink, it sounds like something else. (ex. car crash, glass breaking, screaming, metal clanking together, etc.)

His birthday is November 35th!! (people celebrate it on the 5th of december!)

He behaves like he’s in a cartoon and can be a little slow… (in a loveable way ofc)

He’s allergic to pollen and certain types of flowers </3

He’s also more prone to abdominal pain and nausea;(

Even though he is odd, he is NOT the creepiest creature in the valley

If doe were an animal, he would be a Bullet Dog or a Bark Cat <3

If you were to die, he wouldn’t notice it right away *_*

Doe likes the classic series!!

If you try to comb his hair, his hair WILL absorb it

He watches you sleep :3

He has no ears ^.^

He can drink anything as thick or thicker than oil or blood!

His favorite colors are bright red and burnt orange

He LOVES insects!!

He has no blood and he is naturally hard as clay

Speaking of clay, he doesn’t smell bad or good, he smells like clay or wet rain.

He feeds birds when he’s lonely in the valley 🥲💕

He can’t cry, but he can melt and whine as if he were crying

He is a demonic entity (good luck, buddy!)

Because regular guys reproduce asexually, he can create a mini doe!!

He has no friends or family (besides you ofc <3)

He’s goth but he doesn’t know it >_<

He is 5’8 :3

He weighs 50 kilograms!! (110lbs)

His skin is uncomfortably warm to the touch

If you ever tried to stab him, the knife would get sucked into him and would reappear in his hand.

He does not taste good! His fake body has no nutritional value and in fact REMOVES nutrition from yours!!

It’s hard for him to close his mouth lol

You meet him in House Hunted 2, then see him in HH 1, then finally in the John Doe game!

Idk if I said this, but his nails are naturally black and his teeth are naturally yellow <3

He doesn’t know how to wear his jacket properly

Idk if this is true, but his scars may represent how many times he’s tried to get with you-

If he got piercings, they would melt into his body within 20 minutes 😭

He can express sadness, but not in the way others can

His voice would probably be really deep in the middle of the game

When it’s his birthday, streamers and balloons randomly appear in his house and he celebrates it with his meat effigy of You!

Although he’s not the most dangerous thing in uncanny valley, he’s very hard to kill.

Things he finds cute: Everything “You” does, when “You” is scared, baby rats before they grow hair, heartbeats, and eye contact <3

His favorite candy would be hard candy (or glass 😭)

His hair is slick and uncomfortably warm

Saying “I love you” is his way of flirting

He’s not mentally ill, it’s just the way he acts

He will talk to you about his favorite shows

If he gets to eat you, he sees it as a bonus <3

If you were upset, he would stare at you, call you cute, and wrap his hair around you

He would never hurt you out of strong negative emotions 🥩🖤

He has many rows of teeth that are just collected teeth to try to mimic a human smile

He would never hurt an animal, but they’re scared of him :(

He pefers eating things raw <3

His tongue looks like a lil heart in his mouth, but it’s very long

Whenever he uses human like materials for his body, he looks a lot older and crusty, so he consumes things like metal to create a cleaner body

He stops smiling when someone makes him mad or upset

He has many outfits, but his main outfit is his favorite

He’s a stalker, but not an insane stalker

He weights about 2.5 pounds in his hairball form

He doesn’t have a belly button

He hates Maison Talo because he gets too close to the MC

regular guys are actually pretty clean and they don’t need to bathe! if his human body does get too dirty, he will eat it and craft it over again, but if his hairball body gets dirty, he can take a dust bath! regular guys usually tend to each others hygienic needs too!

The creator stated that they see doe as "trans in representation," but they want their fanbase to have fun and make him whatever they want him to be!

If doe were on a boat, would he get sea sick? The answer is no, but he would be extremely terrified.

He has no preference for the gender of his partner, so he could be considered Pan or canonically, Bisexual.

John doe can drive! Here’s his license:

[mentallhealthmatters]

wait what did shubble do that was ableist?? this is a gen question i did not know she was ableist

She said depression is feeling "a little sad and lazy" and believes in "narc abuse" aka the idea people who are narcacists are inheritly abusers by default because they have NPD, its like having DID or OCD, it doesn't make you a weird or horrible person by default. Lots of people with NPD are actually really good people. But she doesnt believe that.

She also said wilbur was "shopping arpund for therapist" and wasnt in consistent therapy as proof he wasnt trying to get better. But then turned around admitting tk have done similar, bit worded it differently so it didnt sound the same, like she wasnt doing the exact same thing she accused him off.

On top of that, this "claim" of hers shows she does NOT understand how therapy works behinds the scenes for the therapists, and how there are unfortunately shitty therapists who may try and force their religion on you as "soluation" to your issues and shame you when you dont join tbem, but a lot of therapists a surpising ablest, racist, misandrist and generally victim blaming assholes.

Also, additonally sometimes its out of your control and your therapists drops you a client because they dont want you work with YOUyou for whatever reason, or the agency or whatever company theyre with fired or moved them to a different department. Sometimes people have no other choice but to "shop arpund" or be in inconsistent therpay.

Also sometimes when switching therapists, youll be put on a waiting list which can be a month long thing sometimes more than one or a few months, sometimes years and waiting can be worse if you trying to get on certain medicines, or diagnosises.

Like, she really exposed herself pretty badly in my opinion by trying to claim wolbur bite her enough to bleed/leave marks, showing she had no knowledge on physical health and injuries, and by yapping about mental health, ...she also showed herself to be extremely ablest, to point i doubt her claims she was ever genuinely depressed.

She literally sounds like someones ablest mother's, nagging about wilburs messy room, trying to play victim somehow, yet downplaying his mental health and watering down terms or refusing to accept mental health can be more influential on ones behavoir than youd expect.

And im surpised more people arent talking about this outside of wss circles because so many people in the fandom report havinf depression or mental health issues that they struggle with, but wilbur or so and so CC helped them and was their mental anchor during their worst momments and saved their life.

It sucks to see so many of these people miss the obvious red flags in shubbles words because they didnt look past the initial issue.

[icharchivist]

Also, tmi, super serious and all but like

I know i act super cheerful online and everything so it may not be super noticeable but im hella depressed. Like. Extremely depressed. Followed professionally over it and all and already got concerns from doctor asking i wanted to be hospitalized bc my thoughts are extremely worrisome. It gets worse in worse every passing days despite the medication and it's just....

Anyway the only reason i didnt so anything Regrettable:tm: those past few months have literally been "i need to at least reach the end of the year to see the next da come". And boy was it hard to hold on to that. Tho on the funny side it means DA is written in 3 different psych files so that's fun.

So I'll be quite honest as long as I'm happy with the game im not going to nippick it to death. If being happy about it gives me a bit of fuel to keep on living for the next few months hopefully to get my shit together and all, I'm going to ride that high as much as i can.

But yeah. Yeah. Lol.

[crayonverse]

details bout michael n eins dynamic. 2 me (cw physical/emotional abuse, cannibalism, suicide/suicidal idealizations, ableism, self-harm)

michael only refers to himself as eins father when he wants ein to do something, any other time hes just michael .

lets ein not refer to him as sir to make him feel more "special" .

after eins mom broke up w zack she sorta got a bit. out of it. she started neglecting ein and she became depressed. The First Step in ein distrusting others bc his mother stopped paying attention 2 him. michael used a small amount of his magic to control her and make her drown herself in the kitchen sink and then kidnapped ein, making it look like she had killed herself and ein had ran away. .

just as a small thing of me hcing ein as a transguy, michael named him ein bc the meaning of "ian" (which is what his name is just spelled weird) is "God is Gracious" as a constant reminder that michael "saved" ein. .

ein wasnt tested on w forever potions (in the early stages w the other kids) because michael absolutely could not let Zack know he had his other stupid kid. when ein found out about the testing he was extremely upset bc he wasnt "special enough" for it. picture ein 6 years old begging for medical malpractice to be used on him .

he was tested later but as a teen when michael got out, since he didnt have access to the other children. although he wasn't able to use the full potions since he didnt have access to emeralds at the moment, so he used diluted versions of the potions that weren't as powerful via syringes. ein gets a fear needles from it .

when michael n the other two idiots were locked in the pocket dimension ein went through a brief depressive period bc the One Guy he (thought) cared about him disappeared. when michael did get out he didnt tell ein immediately bc he . doesnt like ein but when he found out ein got arrested he told ein that he should stay in jail for a few months to "learn his lesson" .

slightly unrelated but when michael wanted him out of jail he also wanted ein to disappear off the radar so he faked eins death in jail. originally he wanted ein to die in like a riot but ein, sensing an opportunity, asked for it to say he killed himself instead. the opportunity being aphmau half way into her uni course looking up her old high school bullies to see what theyre up to and just finding out ein is Fucking Dead .

the potions michael uses on ein are mainly magic power related (like eins Green Laser) because he likes manipulating ein into doing things rather than using his magic because its "more fun" .

michael subconsciously views ein as his actual son (mcd travis) bc he feels like "this one is a better son" or whatever .

not a specific thing but mother knows best reprise from tangled is a Viewpoint on their dynamic 2 me .

ein is internally scared of michael but he never verbally says that and if anyone asks him if he is he denies it immediately bc he doesnt want pity. you can see it in his eyes though. elizabeth is really the only other person who mentions it but she mostly uses it to make fun of ein because she "doesnt think its that bad" (<- she is unaware) .

bc of michael ein absolutely hates unwarranted physical touch. he reacts violently if anyone grasps his shoulder from behind or touches his upper arms. the only touch he usually allows is people lightly touching his hair/head bc he still registers it as headpats (grabbing his hair usually results in him biting) .

michael usually physically threatens or abuses ein to reprimand him but sometimes he throws ein into the Metaphorical Torture Box for entertainment .

basically most of the things michael does to ein is for his own amusement .

he also heavily dehumanizes ein to convince him to do evil acts, rationalizing it to him as "you arent a person so is it really that bad??" ein does not view himself as an actual person at this point more so as a nameless soldier, a weapon, etc .

i used this for an old fic n stuff too but also michael makes ein commit cannibalism to forcibly dehumanize him more. he wants to make ein feel entirely disconnected from humanity (like michael feels for himself) so ein will basically be a "mini michael" .

ein also consciously copies michaels mannerisms/speech. only really elizabeth n zack notice it however and it just fucking freaks zack the hell out (elizabeth is also freaked out by it but mostly ignores it) .

theres just a general theme of a loss of control for ein in general. he gets a small allowance from michael and hes not allowed out overnight, all his communication is usually internally with the researchers or guardian forces. most of the time ein self isolates from them, viewing them as beneath him and michael. when they try to talk to him its a 50/50 whether he'll tell them to fuck off or he'll hiss at them .

another specific detail is pre s4 ein fucked up a potion and instead of his usual reprimand, michael used pliers to defang ein. in his head its the one thing ein can't rationalize about michaels actions (the one "seed of doubt" he has). he usually makes excuses for michael's actions towards him but being defanged is the only one he struggles with since he knows that michael knows how important his wolf side is to him .

pre s5 and just like at the end of s5 (when ein was seen on the bridge) he was going through another depressive episode bc he missed his ears and tail. he was mainly just going through the motions of his daily life but he was barely holding on. michael repeatedly discouraged ein from committing because the plan would be messed up because of it (michael said that directly to him) and he would imply that ein would be a traitor if he went through with it. .

michael actually flipped between discouraging and encouraging ein to commit to see what he would do. .

he's caught ein self-harming before, w ein attempting to either drown or smother himself. michael doesnt like doing this regularly but most of the time he lets ein hug him so he feels "comforted". other times michael just scolds him and tells him to not do it again. .

i also hc ein as a low empathy autistic (bc # me) and he used to stim very openly and loudly but michael disliked that part of him so he "trained" ein to not stim in public which just results in him being constantly overstimulated, a contributor to Ein being fucking mad all the time. hes like a hair trigger away from a meltdown at all times .

the only method of stimming ein can usually get away w is when he scratches his arms/scabs. unfortunately he doesn't trim his claws and it usually results in ein making himself bleed or reopening scars. michael has attempted to get him to stop doing this but its pretty much a compulsion for ein at this point.

[marshbarks]

the many. many faces in which stan marsh has taken within my personal writing. the many ways in which he permeates my mind and i find him within my characters near constantly, whether he wants to be there or not.

i find that, often, if i create a character meant to represent him or contain some of my emotions around/regarding him, then they are extremely close knit with a character who is supposed to fill some sort of role as 'me'. he is often in a hard-to-define relationship with the 'me' character, or in some cases, a found-family brother. it is difficult to pin down. but if there's a me, there will be a stan, and vice versa.

i guess the first category is "that's just stan", which admittedly, doesn't make for much of an original character, but i've got so many headcanons and such personal attachment through myself that... he might as well be. i think i'll only be sharing these obvious stand ins, for the time being. i got nervous writing out this post and need to hold SOME of my stanleys out of reach atm.

baker (art: me) | rayne (art: adrian+me) | gensi (art: me)

to start here is my classic "stan needs a fursona." sort of. the first one here is Baker, who IS just 'what if stan had a fursona'. the second is rayne who is a big dumb doggy who took all his best friends and left an ugly town he didnt wanna live in anymore, and is trying. SO hard to live somewhere else. however, he's also like. stan's fursona. the third is gensi, who is also currently sort of a blank character that i looked at and said "yeah, another blue/black dog in my possession, thats stanley alright"

then there's the people, who range from 'thats stan', to 'what the fuck'

stan (art: me), marshwalker (art: adrian+me), raven (art: quailxcrossing)

this first one IS just stanley. i don't really try and act like he's an oc, because he isn't. this is the culmination of my 18 years living with a deep attachment to stan. i love him so much the second is marshwalker, though he's taken on moonwander in original writing, because it is cute and honestly fits his werewolf theming better. this is obviously a tsot inspired version of him, but he spans a lot further than that. he works his way into personal projects i've been cooking for about a year now, and slotted himself so perfectly into the story that it's almost wild to think i've only had him for two weeks. he's more of an oc both with the changes made to tsot for our au, AND because he IS stan's oc. like. marshwalker is stan playing a character, moonwander is... an evolution of that same character. the third one is raven. which i just... didn't have the energy to name much of anything else. he is a companion to one of my primary sona characters, and he's a sort of sign of snapshot of my stan, from about 5 years ago. while stan has changed a lot, raven remains the same. he's one i'd call more original now, because of the fact that none of the story he has rings true with..... anything in south park. he's just my little guy who is a dog and drinks too much sometimes.

zherr (art: me) | marsh (art: me) | alucard (art: adrian)

zherr lou is the first one here, and he's inspired by a song i heavily associate with stan. he's...... he's fucking depressed, we'll put it like that. he's going through the worst of it all the time in his mind, and what does he have to show for the struggle? nothing. he's trying, so, so fucking hard to get better. it isn't working out. he's a loser. marsh is the second! creative name, isn't it? he was actually one of my very first "oh that's stan" OCs, obtained alongside another character who fell into a role of representing me pretty well. he's sort of just an emo boy with a serious. SERIOUS of case of bad luck. but emotionally he fills the niche of a stan. alucard is third! he's a bit of a funny story- because he sort of... is also inspired by sebastian of stardew valley? adrian and i were playing, and constructing SUCH a weird narrative, and stan wanted to play too! so. he got to make himself a guy to fit in that role. he's really cool, he's a demon and he only HAS one eye and he cares so much. SO much. he's loves his spouses.

lowell (art: adrian) | logan (art: adrian) | alluin (art: me)

now THESE guys. the first one here is lowell!! he's been my reaction to going absolutely fucking feral over post covid. he's a hellhound who had a bad life and was down on his luck and stumbled drunk into a cafe bc he got cut off at the bar, and saw the prettiest fucking man in his life and has been doing everything to get that man to love him (spoiler: they are husbands eventually) second is logan, based on a mix of the "opposite personality" universe from spookyfish, as well as... as soul evans of soul eater. adrian and i will just make characters that are Anything, okay. it's kinda fucking awesome. he's bitchy and ready to attack people. he's a guard dog for his best friend. he's red. i love him. what more is there to say really. and alluin is the third... ohh, alluin.. in a really big over simplification of the idea. alluin exists to fuel a "what if i lost him" view. the effort i'd go to get him back. the things i would be willing to change to be what was needed to house him. he is so SO deeply personal and important and i cant even get INTO it. he's everything.

hickory (art: me) | abica (art: adrian) | camp (art: adrian)

these three are fun! they feel more like explorations of an extreme, honestly? hickory is a board gamer. a little diy craft kit collector. he's a fuckin DORK and i LOVE HIM. abica is femininity! she represents a happy, healthy idea of it. the ideal version of stan- if he was feminine. she's also super cool and part of an awesome polycule and has so many partners and i think shes the sickest bitch in the world camp is sport! i mean. he's like literally a doggy based on gatorade. he's a jocky sportboy and he's sorta stupid in most other aspects and i think he's so funnnnnnn... guy who is eye candy to people who like 'em buff. he knows it, too.

---

and i have more! i have a lot more. however, um. my vulnerability meter ran out and i got scared so here's these!!!!

[stitchwraith-stingers]

Saw you're family tree post and i love how fleshed how they are! Though i saw you say that that Angela had her own godparent, could you perhaps elaborate on that?

HIIII IM SO GLAD U ASKED... this is one of my fave hcs and im happy i could talk abt it

when she was younger, angela was not in a good headspace mentally, she was extremely depressed to put it lightly, she was also really anxious and when she was 10 she recieved cirrus swiftsky as a godparent, the best i could describe him was like a grandfather to her and looked sort-of fancy, he had a mustache and everything, this wasnt his first rodeo with a kid, hes been doing this for a good few fairy years

angela, altough she used escapism often by reading kids books, she wasnt very "imaginitive" as she describes herself, so her wishes werent anything extreme, and if anything just mostly talked to cirrus about things that were bothering to her, and he wasnt expecting to become a defacto therapist to this kid, he gave her life advice he vaugely remembered while studying to be a godparent (they take mandatory childrens psychology lessons) and gestured her over to try journaling for her thoughts

he often disguised himself as a orange butterfly when outdoors with her (to school, to the park etc), and at home would usually be their pet ferret, who was called tom by her parents

they lasted longer then the usual godparent-godkid duo, 2 years infact, however she was expected to leave him when she was 14 as she was still concidered not yet fully happy, she had accidently blurted it out when her brother walked in on her and she panicked, thus wiping their memories

godparents, if taken away before their kid has been properly reverted to being happy, arent allowed to visit them again, and godkids wont be given another one unless they are in desperate need of them, like if something else drastic happened, even if they are still miserable, this is a big countroversy in the godparenting industry (which i could go on about tbh)

angela, who used cirrus as an anchor, was EXTREMELY distraught, and if anything made her feel worse by the fact she couldnt remember why (codependancy problems, where have i heard that before!) and after afew weeks of refusing to leave her room she decided to go to the library as a way to slowly start getting back to it and she had picked up a psychology book, and thats where she started her psychology interest, along with vaugely remembering her doing jounraling, so she continued and it spiraled into how she is today

though she had picked up psychology books for older people, so she convinced herself she was more "mature" for her age, and even today she hasnt gotten the hang of how 10 year olds should actually work ("lets leave her untill shes ready to come to us" go talk to ur daughter?)

her parents - heather and felix campbell - werent horrible at all, just in the dark about what her kid was doing since she didnt like to share anything she liked with them at all, if anything they were slightly more "loose" if that makes sense, but because she was just anxious she worried that theyd get mad which they often didnt, if that makes sense

she never really had any friends in her life, as she decided she'd focus on that after shes done with her studies, she wasnt really a social outcast, if anything a little socially awkward, shes only had 1 friend during high school and her social life kicked off more in collage, everyone had respected her but she was more of a "i wont talk unless you talk" type of deal, on top of her grades because it gave her something to do in her free time (and she just enjoyed writing essays in general), and she had gotten much much better where she was now! only problem was that she was still anxious about presenting projects

when she was with postpartum depression after hazel was born she couldnt help but feel like she was missing a puzzle piece, yknow how it feels when you know youve forgotten something, but you dont know what? thats how she felt, thankfully she had gotten treatment quickly

hazel does get her more anxious side from her, angela is a good parent and has taught her children to communicate with eachother unlike how she did with hiding it, though she (unknowingly) struggles with properly understanding her 10 year old and being so focused on her work she cant sit down and 'think outside the box' as shes said