#i didn't go to school for human sexuality but i am down to learn

[astr0-physcs]

(working on fics, school is a a bitch rn)

i wanted to say smth about all the recent drama involving several mcyts. i am absolutely irrelevant but i am exhausted of seeing each one of the creators that got me thru covid go down the drain.

wilbur is an abuser. a creepy one too.

george sexually assaulted an 18 year old girl while intoxicated, and i don't think he's streamed his response yet.

dream is a whole bunch of bad things, most prominently a pedophile

but watching as relevant creators spiral and do terrible things is just exhausting. like how hard is it to be a decent human? to not bite your gf??? or get minors drunk??? like what the fuck??? i think about this every single day.

i do not wilbur to become so terribly cancelled that Lovejoy breaks up. i would be very distraught and upset. you don't have to support anyone you don't want to, but i care too deeply about the other members of that band and their music to stop supporting them. i truly believe that wilbur george and dream deserve the chance to understand why what they did was wrong. NOT forgiveness. do not forgive, do not forget. take accountability and learn from your mistakes.

punz is a different case. i didn't follow him in the height of his career so i had no idea who Andi was. or is for that matter. I saw her comments on Tumblr, and punz's response. i think that the fact that punz spewed PARAGRAPHS of evidence and accountability is damning george ever single second. i don't think punz abused or assaulted anyone, but he definitely made mistakes that again, shouldn't be forgiven or forgotten. i hope he, along with the rest of them, learn not only how to take accountability for their actions, but also understand WHY those things are wrong. Punz did explain why he knew they were wrong, but just a fact, not an excuse. i really hope others can follow in his footsteps. or better yet, be a decent human being.

i'm tired. i'm sick of all my previously favorite creators being accused of one thing after another and it all being true. it's exhausting and i haven't downloaded twitter for a reason 💀 i wish the absolute best for the victims and am with them in every step of the way. Please support victims and be proud of them coming and sharing their stories. 💕

anyways yea fart doodie

[eighthdoctor]

Hmmm two semi-related questions that have been rattling around in my brain for awhile:

1) Do you think there is much of a BDSM/kink culture on Azeroth?

and

2) Many a joke and comment have been made about Jaina and her Many Suppressed Kinks, but why *is* she so repressed?

WHAT A DELIGHTFULLY MEATY ASK THANK U.

cut for holy shit yeah we gonna talk sex (also I keep talking super strongly about things but this is all personal opinion--founded in canon but nevertheless, if you want to write Jaina otherwise be my guest)

1-Is there a kink culture on Azeroth? Glad you phrased it like this, because I don't think there's anything so organized.

Kink, sure. We're all primates (.........or something) and humanoids come preinstalled with a Thing about power and hierarchy, and some of us are going to turn that sexual. Every society on Azeroth has some form of kink, both in the sense of bondage/discipline, dominance/submission, sadism/masochism stuff, and in the sense that there's things that are taboo and edgy and so therefore super hot to some subset of individuals.

Kink culture? Terminology and munches and people passing down advice about how to slap so you don't hurt someone? Less so.

Definitely there are cultures where BDSM (especially the D/s and S/M sides) is more socially acceptable than among Azeroth humans, I am looking specifically at orcs, you cannot tell me that a culture with honor duels is not also into consensually beating the shit out of each other during sex. There are peoples who are much more into polyamory and swinging, and who are super into high protocol D/s stuff (hello collective quel'dorei fanon to justify Jaina/Sylvanas/Dark Rangers but also I don't care it's great).

But see previous ask about monsterfucking, it's all so racialized that unless you are that race it's not talked about, and if you are, it's not super deviant because what, an orc likes CBT? Not a surprise. The problem here is how much does the 'deviance' aspect matter in kink? Western civ is so sex-negative that we've stigmatized basically everything that isn't cishet PIV missionary style, so how much of what we consider kink wouldn't be erotic if it was normalized? Idk this isn't my field but it is relevant here.

At any rate: I'm not because I'm happily married but I could reach out to a kink subculture and find a compatible partner who lives in my area on like...several different platforms. And one way or another I could have done this 60 years ago too (possibly more! I just know through the 60s). This bit I don't think exists on Azeroth, I don't think there's that level of organization and communication.

Which leads nicely to:

2-Why is Jaina so repressed?

Not a simple answer, even a joking one, just a bunch of interlocked issues.

First: Kul Tiran is based off Britain, and it's specifically based off a sort of temporally variable Britain from approximately 1485-1850 so like, I am free to pick the most deranged bits of British social norms and waltz off. Jaina, due to school, probably didn't get a sex talk from her parents but rather from someone in Dalaran (awk) or more likely, the library. She's not from a sex positive culture. She's not even from a sex neutral culture. She's from a country where "lie back and think of England Kul Tiras" is complete sex advice, and then she went off to school.

Second: Not that school isn't a GREAT area to learn about sex but we have no evidence that Jaina was a social butterfly and a lot of evidence that she wasn't, and then she goes directly from Dalaran into war.

And then she's Lady of Theramore and then she's on the Council of Six and then there's whatever the fuck she's doing during Legion, and while there are periods in here where her life sucks LESS and it is completely VIABLE for her to do some sexual exploration but it's also like. These aren't periods where she's going to be going "ah yes I want to interrogate the bit where my deepest desire is for Thrall to rail me hard, pinning my hands to a wall, not letting me go even if I ask", among other reasons because she's not around anyone who is both definitely sex positive AND a social equal who she's interested in learning from.

Related, three: Boy does she need therapy.

Kink means vulnerability, and Jaina's a switch but she's more of a sub, and being a sub means a lot of vulnerability, and letting yourself be vulnerable. I cannot think of something Jaina is less likely to want, especially after Theramore.

In order for Jaina to explore her kinks, she needs to acknowledge that she has them and--ideally--stop shaming herself for having them, which means making peace with the bit where she really, really wants someone to call her names and make her crawl and slap her around. Which is a lot for anyone to process, really, never mind how much Jaina specifically is an advocate for equality and compassion. And she wants to be hurt in bed?

(Which, to be clear, 2 things: One, because I think introspection is necessary for Jaina to realize her kinks does not mean it's a requirement for others, just that Jaina overthinks everything so she'll overthink this too. Two, I obviously don't see a contradiction between wanting equality in 'real life' and roleplay in the bedroom. I think those go together fine and I am fervently committed to "Jaina is a kinky bastard" headcanon. Jaina has a problem with it.)

So to the extent that she acknowledges at all that she's into Some Shit, she views it as a problem, a flaw to be expunged. Proper, good ladies don't want to be held down and teased until they're crying and begging for something more and then left like that--

Four: With who.

Jaina's canonical relationships (and the only two I'm letting her have in TPtMB (except possibly one night stands?) because I'm evil) are Arthas and Kalec.

If you expect me to think that Kalec does anything but missionary in bed with the lights off, you're wrong.

Furthermore Kalec is not the sort of person to encourage Jaina to explore that inner darkness. He's going to make sure she's enjoying herself! He's not shorting her in bed. He's just not after anything else, he doesn't think she should be after anything else, he genuinely doesn't think she is after anything else, in short: It's vanilla sex only here and no discussion of any alternatives ever comes up.

From Arthas: She's late teens and blonde haired, blue eyed, curves everywhere, a princess in everything but title, there is absolutely no way Arthas does a single thing she doesn't want. None. There is zero way that Arthas Menethil, paladin, who, yes, is going to turn into something else, expose the ugly parts until there's nothing left but who isn't there yet, who's the golden prince, who's joining Kul Tiras to Lordaeron and it's a love match but it's political--

They also do missionary in bed but the lights are on this time.

In sum:

Repressed cultural background where you Do Not Talk About Sex

Went to school as the world's biggest nerd, then it's been nearly nonstop crises for 25 years

Thinks that self-reflection is a spell, has never stopped to wonder if maybe the fantasies are ethically neutral

Dated only men who were boring in bed.

[mandiweirdmore]

So... Yeah I am part of the 80% of intellectually disabled women.

This is my story and why I believe children should have proper sex education in school and have a discussion with their parents. I Beg of you to know the signs especially if you are Autistic or a parent of an Autistic child. We are at such a higher risk than others and not having the knowledge of what sex even is makes it inevitable.

How can one speak up for themselves if they do not have the words to describe what happened to them?

WARNING- This discusses sexual assault, rape, and statistics of it happening to Autistic women. Please be aware of your triggers viewer's discretion is advised.

This is really hard to write about let alone speak about. I can count the number of people I have told about the incident on one hand. I suppose I shouldn't call it an "incident". Incident applies it only happened once... that is not the case. You may be wondering why I would post about it on the internet if I'd rather push the memory to the darkest place of my mind and never think about it again. I don't have much luck pushing the memories away they resurface every once in a while. I don't think I am the only woman who feels this way, so I want to share my story. I want you to know you're not alone and I want parents to know how to protect their children plus know the signs.

SIGNS TO LOOK FOR

Refusing to bathe

Bathing to much

Frequent UTIs

Isolation

Wetting the bed

Scared to be touch

Becoming a germaphobe out of nowhere

Nightmares

Refusing to change

Refusing to wear the clothes they once loved

Refusing to sleep

Becoming mute

Seeming on edge or jumpy

I feel sick typing the story let alone saying it but a therapist said writing the trauma down is a part of the moving-on process. I don't even have to show it to anyone might even just delete this. Then maybe I can work up to saying it out loud one day.

I was seven and I was a victim of child-on-child sexual abuse known as COSCA. It was my babysitter's son he was four years older than me and I had failure to thrive so I was always much smaller and weaker compared to everyone around me. I still believed myself much stronger than the doctors and my parents deemed me. I would wrestle anyone I was the definition of a tomboy girl who grew up on a farm. My father told me not to wrestle with the neighbor boys. To this day I wonder if he knew the boy had other intentions. It started with teasing and pushing me around. I was unaware of what friendship looked like I was young and undiagnosed autistic so I thought it was normal. I went there every day after school my mom worked insane hours and so did my dad. This was the time of the recession and my medical bills were insane because I saw a gastro specialist that we could not afford. My neighbors babysat me for free and knew of my family's situation that was used against me. The boy would make me go to his room he told me if I told anyone what he did to me he would tell his mom to stop babysitting me then my parents wouldn't be able to work. I knew we would lose the house or I wouldn't be able to go to the doctor and I couldn't let that happen. I didn't understand what he did to me or why he wanted to I just know I felt dirty and disgusting. I never wanted to be touched again everything was disgusting. Human bodies were disgusting and I did not understand them. It went on for months and only stopped because we did indeed lose the house and had to move. This fact made it all worse that I had been forced to do these things for nothing. I did not grasp what happened to me until I was seventeen because no one had taught me what sex was I learned from books all on my own. School taught abstinence and I never had a discussion with my parents about it.

I find myself frequently thinking of him. Does he remember what he did to me? Did he do it to others? I wish I had spoken up if not to help myself but for others. But truly how can one speak up when one does not have the words to explain what happened to them.

I want you all to know you are loved you are not alone. I felt utterly alone as a child because I didn't understand what happened to me so I hope my story can help you not have that feeling. COSCA is still sexual assault you are valid. You are not what happened to you. You are so much more.

[thelokeancouncil]

Spellbound Serendipity

Incubus! Trafalgar Law x Witch! OC

Fandom: One Piece

Pairing: Trafalgar Law x Monkey D. Melodia (My OC)

AU: Magic school, Magic world

Rating: M (For some sexual content further down the line, cussing, and mentions of violence)

Summary: Monkey D. Melodia was so excited to finally have her familiar and be initiated into upperclassmen status. That was until a supposed prank went horribly wrong and caused her to be bonded to an Incubus!

Now the witch and Incubus duo must learn how to navigate daily life with this new entanglement.

Master Jinbei may have some insight into Law's past and what sets him apart from others Incubus.

Will the bond between witch and Incubus grow stronger or will these two souls locked together be forced to suffer under mistrust and pain?

Chapter 2: A routine and a secret

"Just so we're clear, I am not sleeping on the floor," Law grumbled, giving a disapproving look at the Full sized bed in the room. 

"I'm not sleeping on the floor either," Mel said, sitting on the edge of the bed and looking down at the floor. She hadn't really thought about what would be affected by the now bond she shared with the grumpy Incubus until they had gotten back to her dorm room. "Come to think of it… if you aren't able to go too far from me then how are we gonna take showers?" Mel asked as a blush began to rise on her cheeks. She definitely didn't think about that part until now. 

"Looks like you're gonna have to trust me," Law replied, a sly looking grin slowly forming on his lips. He then plopped down next to her on the edge of the bed and looked at her. He reached out with a clawed finger and lifted a piece of hair away from her face. 

Melodia shivered a little at the action, she didn't dare spare a glance at him in fear that he was going to hypnotize her or something. She sighed to herself as she knew that at the moment there was no other way around their predicament. "Fine… I guess I can trust you for now, but you do anything perverted then I will spray you with Holy Water," Melodia retorted, her blush getting a bit darker. 

"See, that wasn't so hard was it?" Law replied mocking her from earlier and then he let out a soft laugh at her threat. "You do know that Holy Water doesn't work on all demons right? It's fine I wouldn't dream of being perverted with stupid witch like you," He added after a moment earning a glare from the girl beside him. 

Melodia rolled her eyes "That's fine, I'll eventually figure out something you're weak to or afraid of, but for now I want to take a shower and get ready for bed. I have another day of classes in the morning," Melodia said and then took a deep breath.

"Would it help if I turn away while you undress?" Law asked with a small groan of disappointment. 

"Please…" Melodia answered quietly and then waited for the Incubus to turn his back to her. 

"Speaking of trust, how do I know you aren't gonna do something to hurt me when I turn my back to you?" Law asked after a moment of just listening to the sound of Melodia's robes rustling. He squeezed his eyes shut a little tighter as if it would prevent the thoughts he began to form in his mind. 

She had a beautiful face, with soft looking chubby cheeks. From the glances he had taken of her rare curves he'd seen under her loose robes, he was already guessing that her body must also be just as beautiful. He then began to wonder what her skin must feel like, was it soft and warm like most humans? What would it look like for her hair to be splayed out under her while she laid flat on the bed at his mercy and… 

"Hey emo boy are the lights on upstairs?" Mel's voice broke him out of his thoughts. He clenched his fist, perfect timing too because he knew that if he let his thoughts go another step further then he'd be having to awkwardly explain why his dick was hard. 

He took a deep breath and rolled his eyes at the new nickname that she'd thrown at him. "Yeah, yeah I'm fine… let's get this over with already because my body is exhausted," He answered flatly and then he snapped his fingers. 

As he snapped his fingers his normal clothes disappeared leaving him in only a towel wrapped around his waist. Melodia blinked for a moment as she was now able to view a gorgeously toned chest littered with tattoos. He even had a perfectly groomed treasure trail! 

"Now look who's being perverted," Law teased seeing the mesmerized look on her face. He knew that look. He'd fucked enough ladies and gents to know that it was most definitely attraction. 

Melodia blinked and quickly turned away from him, her face flushing a dark shade of pink again. "Shut up emo boy and c'mon" She shot back at him and then she led them to the bathroom. 

Taking a shower was definitely an experience. Melodia refused to stand naked in front of Law primarily because of him being an Incubus. The other reason was because she had never been naked in front of a man before. She was still a virgin unlike her older brother Ace and had no idea what to do when it came to sex. 

Witch and Incubus took turns in the stand up shower with one of their hands sticking out of the cracked open door. They were in this predicament because an invisible chain was revealed on both their wrists once water touched it. "I really hope we don't have to do this for the rest of eternity," Law mused while he took his unchained arm to scrub his hair. 

"I hope not either, but if we do then we'll just have to adjust to the circumstances. Animals adapt to their circumstances to survive," Melodia replied leaning against the outside of the shower door to give him as much movement as possible. 

Law poked his head out of the shower door, his shaggy black bangs hanging in his eyes. "That's not all animals do to survive ya know," He whispered in her ear. He then teased her by darting his tongue out to lick her earlobe before he quickly stuck his head back into the shower. 

"PERV!" Melodia shrieked, her cheeks now burning because the delicate lick he left to her earlobe gave her a weird tingling sensation. She then yanked on the chain and caused Law to smack into the shower door with a resounding thud. 

"OW! Geez I'm sorry," He groaned and glared at the door to the shower. After a moment he felt the chain go a little slack again so he went back to finishing with his shower. 

Once they were both finished, Law mumbled something under his breath. A minute later a weird noise rang out along with a weird blue looking light. He then came out of the shower dressed in a pair of yellow and black sleep pants, a heart that matched one on his arm along the leg. 

Melodia looked confused and in awe as she continued to stand there wrapped in her towel. "How in hell did you do that?" Melodia asked, earning a chuckle from Law. 

"What? You mean to tell me that you're a witch and you don't know how to perform a spell for clothes? Pathetic" Law teased glancing up and down at her towel clad body. 

Melodia realized he was checking her out and clenched the towel closer to her body. "I'm still a beginner at magic so no I haven't learned that kind of spell yet. Quit that!" She snaps glaring at him. 

"Yeah, yeah, lemme help you with that then" Law answered barking out a laugh and then he took a deep breath. "Room!" He said aloud and suddenly Melodia was surrounded in the blue light she had seen come from the shower. "Shambles" He then said after a long minute of leaving Melodia in anticipation. As the second word left his lips, she looked down to see she was in one of her favorite nightgowns.

Once the blue light was gone she slowly looked up at him. "Uh… thank you…" She mumbled and then she went over to the sink to brush her teeth. 

The rest of the night went fairly uneventful bar the small argument the two had about what position would be best for them to sleep in. In the end they found a way to sleep facing away from each other, their wrists attached together laying on top of them. That was how they fell asleep, but definitely wasn't how they woke up. 

The next morning… 

The sound of the obnoxious and loud Navi alarm clock woke him first, much to the Incubus' dismay. He looked over with tired eyes to see that it was only 6:00 am.

He realized that sometime in the night, Melodia had rolled over and was now laying with her head on his shoulder. The Incubus part of him wanted to take advantage of this situation, but something was stopping him. He glanced down at her sleeping form, she looked so peaceful and it was actually adorable.

His mind then began to wander about what it might be like to wake up like this next to her every morning. He imagined it would be warm and fuzzy like the feeling he had in his stomach at the moment. No! He was an Incubus. He sold his soul years ago, he wasn't allowed to have this peace because he gave it away. 

He didn't really regret the reason for why he made the deal, he just regretted making the deal at all. He wished he would have thought more rationally and listened to Cora. Now he was stuck in the tortuous hell that was knowing he didn't deserve to have anything normal or good in his life. Incubi don't have families. 

Suddenly he felt her begin to stir awake. He realized his arm was still around her and panicked trying to roll away. This ended with him toppling off the bed and onto the floor.

"W-Whoa! Hey!" Melodia cried hoarsely as she toppled over and landed on top of him on the floor. "What was that for? Have you ever heard of an alarm clock before?" Mel questioned as she groggily tried to get to her bearings. 

She blinked a few times as she realized what position they had landed in. Realizing how dirty this seemed, she quickly jumped off of him and clutched her chest. 

Law blushed a little as well, but turned his face away so that she couldn't see it. "U-Uh yeah… I haven't," He lied because he was not about to risk her finding out the real reason why he freaked out. "Why does it have to be so damn loud and obnoxious?" He growled pretending to glare up at the clock on her bedside table. 

"Because I'm a heavy sleeper and if I don't have it like that then I won't wake up on time," Melodia answered plainly and then she stretched and let out a yawn. She then stood up and dragged the grumpy Incubus into the bathroom to start her morning routine. 

Lunch Period 

"Alright class, remember to practice your luminous spell as we will be using it for the moon water collection field trip next Friday," Master Jinbei announced as the bell sounded for the lunch period to begin. 

He then watched as the students began to file out of his classroom, each one saying their pleasantries. "Oh… Miss Monkey can I see you for just a second" He spoke up as Melodia was getting ready to leave with Law floating over her. 

Melodia paused for a moment as she finished packing up her knapsack. "Yes Master, am I in trouble?" She asked nervously. Law also felt a chill of unease run through him for some reason and it caused him to bare his fangs. 

Jinbei chuckled softly seeing the Incubus' reaction and waved them both off. "No, no, of course not child. I had heard about what happened yesterday and I wanted to just talk to you for a moment to see how you were," Jinbei reassured her and then he invited her over to his desk so that they could both sit down. 

Melodia instantly calmed down and followed her teacher in sitting down by his desk. "Um yes sir, I'm surviving I suppose…I still don't know what really happened. I didn't mean for this to happen though," Melodia said, yanking a little on the invisible chain. 

"Hmm I see, well from what I've observed so far about your permanent guest is that he doesn't seem to be like other Incubus. He's a lot tamer than others I've seen," Jinbei replied, looking over Law for a moment. It was like the Fishman was looking for something on Law, what it was, Law didn't know. 

"Geez thanks for talking about me like I'm not right here or anything," Law quipped sarcastically and crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Hush emo boy," Mel hissed up at him before turning to look back at her teacher. "What do you mean Sir? I thought Incubus were all the same,"

"Not quite. Incubus and Succubus are actually much more complex demonic creatures than the human community gives them credit for," Jinbei explained and then he opened his desk drawer and pulled out a book of demons and demonic entities. 

The Fishman then trifled through the pages until he came across the page on Incubi. "See here, there are four main types of Cubi demons. The first are those who are born with the blood of a Cubi in their veins, a lot of times they are hybrid species. The second are humans who made a deal with a chief Cubi out of either stupidity or desperation and was turned into a Cubi-" 

"I WASN'T STUPID OR DESPERATE, SHE WAS DYING!" Law snapped angrily, his wings flared up, eyes turned red, and his muscles tensed. His breathing became ragged and he shut his eyes. 

Melodia shot a look up at Law and grew concerned. Jinbei must have hit a nerve with him by accident. "Hey…" She said quietly and then she cautiously put her hand on his knee. "Easy now Law… look at me," She spoke calmly, her voice like a balm to his ears. 

His body shook a little, but his red eyes finally mustered up the courage to look at her. His breathing was still heavy, his jaw was also clenched. She didn't try to run away though. Her hand felt gentle against his leg, not burning hot like some humans who tried to touch him when his thoughts spiraled.

"I'm sorry, but the curse has progressed too far in your daughter's body. There isn't anything else we can do, but let her be comfortable and content," 

"No! Please Doctor, there has to be something we can do! There must be some spell you haven't tried!"

"There is nothing that we can do that won't cross dark and unholy territory Ms. Trafalgar… I'm sorry" 

"Law, take a deep breath for me, can you do that?" Melodia instructed calmly and then she carefully reached out to take his hand in her own. She carefully pulled him downwards so that his face was level with her own. She then took a deep inhale and slowly exhaled. Melodia repeated this process a few times hoping that he would see and follow her lead. 

Inhale… 1 2 3… Exhale… 1 2 3… 

A few minutes of this and the memories that were circling his brain like vultures began to go away. It almost shocked him when he found himself growing calm again. What the hell? No one had ever been able to do that before, he usually just let the memories torture him into a dreamless sleep. 

"That's it, easy does it… are you ok?" Mel asked softly, her eyes filled with concern and kindness. Law nodded slowly as he didn't trust his words at the moment. The kindness in Melodia's eyes scared him a little because he had almost forgotten what it looked like. The last person who he saw that kindness in was his old master Corazon. 

Melodia then turned to look back at master Jinbei again with an apologetic look. "I'm sorry sir…" She said bowing in respect and mercy. 

Jinbei looked at Law quizzically for a moment and then turned back to look at Melodia. "No need for an apology child, he just confirmed to me that he isn't like many Cubi. I'm going to write down some notes from my book here that might become useful for you and give them to you later so as to not stir up another PTSD attack. You two best be going to lunch period anyways before your twin brother starts looking for you," Jinbei replied calmly. 

"Thank you so much Sir, it means a lot that you're giving me so much help with this," Melodia said and then she took a hold of her knapsack. She then grabbed Law's hand to lead him out of the classroom. 

"It's no trouble at all, it isn't everyday that this kind of thing happens. You're also one of my best students Melodia and I want to help you through this. We will find out who caused this on you," Jinbei promised and then he went back to his book. 

"C'mon emo boy, let's get going to lunch," Melodia said absently earning an eye roll from Law. He pulled his hand from her grasp and began hovering beside her. 

"Mention that to no one." Law grunted as they made their way towards the dining hall. 

[rebelcourtesan]

My Recommendation for 'Serious' Anime

Below is a list of anime I love as they aren't just simple 'kids in school' or 'friendship will beat all odds' tropes. The characters are serious and tackle serious problems and themes.

TRIGGER WARNING: All of these anime have blood, violence, and death in them. Some even have sexual assault and torture. I'll mark the ones that do.

Gotta start with this gem. Humanity lives within walls, protected from Titans, giants with a hunger for human flesh. Eren's life is shattered when the walls is broken by the Colossal Titan and his village is overrun by Titans, eating his mother and ruining his childhood. He joins the cadets to learn how to take on these monstrosities to save humanity and uncover startling revelations within and outside of the walls.

I don't want to get into spoiler territory, but things aren't what they seem with the characters. They do come across as tropes with Eren being the hot headed protagonist, Armin the quiet brains, and Mikasa the cool beauty, but they each come into their own person through character development and events that mark their traumas and their response to it.

I do not understand why this anime isn't talked about more. It's an old anime from 1999, but it's themes still hold true today.

Shu is a carefree boy who meets a strange silent girl, Lala-Ru. While befriending her, they are captured by solders from another world and enlisted in their brutal army to fight a pointless war under the leadership of a deranged dictator who wants to use Lala-Ru special power over water for his own ends.

I'm going to go ahead and tell you this anime is brutal. Bad things happen to good people while villains who did atrocious things regret their actions. While I recommend this anime, it is a hard watch for anyone as there as children are forced to becoming soldiers, girls being raped by soldiers to be used as breeders, and torture.

I am more than happy to announce this gem has been rereleased on Netflix in its entirety of 70+ episodes. While this is an investment of time, (being frank here, far shorter than some more popular anime), this anime should be at the top of anyone's psychological thriller list.

Fed up with corrupt hospital politics of favoring celebrity or wealthy patients in emergency situations, Dr. Kenzo Tenma goes against the hospital director's orders and performs emergency brain surgery on a young boy shot in the head. He saves the lad's life, but 10 years later, realizes he made a terrible mistake as the boy has grown up to become a serial killer. On the run for a murder he didn't commit, Dr. Tenma travels across Europe looking for the monster whose life he should never have saved.

This anime mostly takes place in Germany after the fall of the Berlin Wall so there are a lot of political situations in this, but most of all it is a fugitive story of Tenma trying to hunt down a killer who is already a step ahead of him and deep conspiracy of his origins. Tough topics are corruption, addiction, and racism is a big thing in this show.

Seriously, one of the best ever written villains, Johann, is so terrifying, I still feel a shudder every time he comes on screen.

Hear me out. While is is technically a 'kids in school' anime, there are scarier things afoot than someone's crush rejecting them.

Koichi has transferred to a new school to class 3-3 and the students receive him with cold and suspicious looks. Also, there's a mysterious girl in his class everyone seems not to see or notice . . .

I can't give away too much without spoiling the plot which has a lot of twists and turns. This is one of my favorite horror anime with a mystery that kept me on the edge of my seat. I seriously wish I could hit my head and forget this anime so I can watch it for the first time again.

Think of someone created an anime version of Salem's Lot and you would get Shiki.

In the peaceful village of Sotoba, an mysterious illness afflicts the citizens. People suffering from a strange form of anemia puzzles the town's doctor. Also, a strange family moves into the village in the dead of night and local girl Megumi disappears only to be found in the woods cold and suffering from blood loss . . .

Another excellent horror anime which doesn't pull it's punches. It sports a large cast of characters from the town doctor, the priest of a village's temple, and the school kids who try to save the town, everyone doesn't come out of this with clean hands. The anime styles of the characters are a little funky and remind me of 60's anime, but in a good way.

Don't let the title card fool you.

Madoka and her best friend Sayaka discover a cat like creature named Kyubey who offers to transform them into Magical Girls to combat Witches who prey on innocent people's emotions. Yet, she's warned by a strange dark hair Magical Girl, Homura, not to accept Kyubey's offer.

This anime completely takes the Magical Girl tropes and flips it on its ear. Definitely worth a watch, if only to experience the shocking revelations this anime presents.

Anime Vikings . . .what more should I say? Currently on Netflix with the second season airing each week.

As a young boy, Thorfinn admired his father, village leader Thors and stowed away on his boat when goes away to war. Alas, his fantasy of adventuring with his father is shattered when Thors is killed in a raid and Thorfinn is taken in by the same Vikings who killed his father. He is taught how to fight and survive in battle, grows up desiring a peaceful land where he doesn't have to fight, Vinland.

It's Vikings, so expect a lot of raiding and violence. Not to mention slavery.

This is a gem that came out of nowhere! I had first thought this was a cash grab from the franchise, but damn, if they didn't give this anime their best.

Set in Night City of Cyberpunk, street kid David tries to stand on his own while appeasing his hard working mother, until a tragedy leaves him on his own with a military grade implant he has installed into his body which gives him faster reflexes in combat. He gets taken in by a group of Edgerunners, mercenaries who take any job for money and falls in love with the cool and aloof Lucy.

This anime hits hard by making you care for characters who die violent deaths, not to mention the devastation of the mental illness Cyperpyschosis. In Night City, it's not how you live that makes you a legend, it's how you die.

I'm talking about the 1997 anime series and the movie trilogy. The animation for the 2016 series isn't that great with terrible animation. So I recommend just the 1997.

Set in a low fantasy medieval world, mercenary Guts joins the Band of the Hawk, a mercenary group of young warriors under the command of the beautiful Griffith whose ambition will lead to the group's downfall.

This is another anime with characters you will fall in love with the loyal Guts, determine Casca, and charismatic Griffith. There is multiple attempts of sexual assault on Casca, so be warned before watching.

Years ago, a group of men killed Angelo's family in cold blood. Seeking revenge, Angelo infiltrates the Vanetti Family and befriends the don's son Nero, one of the men responsible for his family's murder.

This is one of the few anime I will only watch dubbed. While I have nothing against the Japanese VAs, the atmosphere and story is so 1920's Prohibitions, hearing the characters speak Japanese breaks the immersion for me. The English cast does a great job with the Brooklyn accents.

This is a story about revenge and how far someone will go for it. Angelo is cold and determine to take down the killers, including Nero, who is a poor friendly soul who is guilt stricken over his actions that day. Not knowing Angelo's true identity, he takes him under his wing and forms a friendship based on lies and subterfuge. Being a mafia story, there will be blood and crime aplenty so be warn if are easily triggered by violence.

[purefandomonium]

Oh boy, this has just triggered my rant mode. This is gonna be long, so I'll put it under a read more. Just know that I really love this show, I hate the way it was treated, and I've been rewatching it lately so everything is pretty fresh in my mind. This also goes way in depth on the show and there are gonna be spoilers. You've been warned.

That was some of the best character growth I've seen, and THE best in the whole show (in my opinion). Newton and Kimmy's relationship is pretty fleshed out, and special props for the writers not going the robot-becomes-human-because-it-can-love route. Newton, aka Octus, is still very much an alien robot. But he's also not just a machine. He has emotions and other human traits--concern, empathy, curiosity, humor, a sense of justice, a love for popsicles... The list goes on.

It was never really mentioned in the show, so this is purely speculation, but it seems like he was designed by the king to be Lance's and Ilana's guardian and nothing more. He was a way to form Titan and something that could process danger better than the two of them. I don't think anyone planned on him going through such a fundamental shift. Look at how matter-of-fact he is in the first couple of episodes, and then compare that to later episodes like Ballad of Scary Mary, I Am Octus, and, of course, Lessons in Love. Heck, by Elephant Logic he's starting to go into a quasi dad mode because Lance and Ilana are bickering like children and he feels the need to be a better "parent." There's a whole ton of other episodes highlighting Newton's change into something more, but that's too much to get into. When he starts gaining human traits and branching out from the robot trope, it seems to take everyone by surprise, even himself.

My point is: by the episode in question, Newton is coming to terms with newfound feelings that he can't name, that baffle him because he shouldn't even be capable of doing this. He's supposed to be Lance and Ilana's guide, their protector, and a fundamental part of Titan. So why is he trying to help the popular girl with her geometry homework and insisting to Lance and Ilana that he absolutely, totally, does not under any circumstances, have a crush on Kimmy? Why did he even let her come over instead of just putting his foot down and snapping at her, similar to what he did with Meat when the school was under attack? It leaves him utterly baffled why he's trying so hard to actually help her--both with the homework but also with her self-esteem. If what he insisted to the others was really true, he could've just done it for her like she wanted and sent her on her way. But he didn't do that. He chose not to.

It's clear that Newton has some kind of soft spot for Kimmy. He genuinely tries to help her and gets almost comically irritated at her stubborn refusal to try. He ignores her whining, begging, and "convincing." He does what any good friend would do and encourages her, builds her up, and gives her a confidence in herself she never expected to have. If it were any other student, he'd likely have made up some excuse as to why he couldn't help unless it directly impacted the trio's secrecy. (Imagine if Baby Face pulled this stunt. Now that could've been a great episode.) He's earnest in his words and seems genuinely proud when she finally gets it and hugs him. And then he gets absolutely flustered when she wants to kiss him. The literal sparks that fly when she does land a kiss just cements the fact that, against all odds, he's somehow developed some kind of strong emotion towards her.

Again, I like how the writers don't automatically rope it into heavy romance because the "robot learned to love and now it's human." Aside from hand-holding, a few kisses, and likely dates, their relationship seems to function on a bond built off trust and enjoyment of each other's company. There's no distinct "love" to it and at no point does Newton ever view Kimmy in a sexual manner. (Heck, I don't even think she views him that way either!) When Lance and Ilana question him on it--and again, this is just my perception of the scene, YMMV--they seemed more concerned about the ramifications of the relationship in regards to Newton not being, well, able in certain ways, we'll say. It didn't read like it was only concern for the potential to jeopardize their mission. They just... don't want anyone getting hurt and at least partially doubt his ability to feel this way in the first place.

Newton responding with the statement that he can't say he loves Kimmy is especially good. It shows that he's definitely caught some kinda feelings but is also able to remain logical despite them. He doesn't know if he's just happy, in love, or some other emotion. All he knows is that he likes being around her and doesn't hate the feeling he gets. He's able to see both sides of the coin: the human side, and the robot side. This doesn't really have anything to do with my rant, I just think it's neat.

As for Kimmy, as soon as Newton makes it clear he doesn't see Kimmy as useless, a ditz, a sex toy, or some combination of the three, she starts appreciating him. I can't really decide if she already had a bit of a liking to him or if it was the fact he was so honest and kind, but she ends up liking him for who he is. She feels happy--seemingly for the first time--that someone recognizes her as an individual and that she can be more than just the hot cheerleader trope. And that alone helps her break free from the mold and be herself. No one ever told her she didn't have to stay the air-headed mean girl. To have someone respect her as a person, and want her to be herself... It must've been like a whole new world for her.

Seeing the two of them evolve in this manner--Newton more than Kimmy but that's to be expected, being a more important character and all--was a really interesting arc. Especially for a show that didn't last long enough to bring out the real big stuff. I always like it when shows highlight more than just the main characters. And Lance and Ilana are the main focus of the show. Let's be real here. If it was made by anyone else, then Octus' writing would have suffered big time. Despite being one of the core trio, he probably would've remained the Robot Companion™️ at best, or been turned into a villain at worst. The fact that the series occasionally brought Octus/Newton to the forefront and let Lance and Ilana take the backseat at times was a breath of fresh air. To me it made the show much more enjoyable and made his character really stand out. You know, so it could gut punch you in the feels with maximum force when he temporarily died.

Whenever people talk about Sym-bionic Titan (rip you deserved so much better) someone inevitably brings up that scene where Kimmy is dancing on the table and shaking her ass at Newton and shit and I get it, I really do, that scene is WILD.

But it always ENDS there. No one ever talks about what happens after that.

Kimmy opens up and tells Newton that it's all just an act she puts on. She explains that, due to the fact that she's pretty, she feels like there's this ROLE she has to fill.

Pretty girls are supposed to be ditzy, they're supposed to be selfish, they're supposed to be mean and manipulative and full of themselves.

But in reality she's a very intelligent, very sweet, and very nervous kid that just wants to fit in somewhere.

[whysojiminimnida]

I might have misunderstood and in that case I’m sorry but..how does jm or jk liking feminine stuff regarding their appearance or interests or else have anything to do with gender? I guess it’s probably me watching all those debates (I’ve seen this discussed on twitter multiples times) from a non-westerner and old-school lesbian perspective if I may say but this western genderqueer thing doesn’t make very much sense to me. You can be a guy and like so-called feminine stuff, or like to play with both masculinity and femininity. It doesn’t you any less of a guy, doesn’t make you a woman or an in-between, it just makes you an androgynous guy or a fem guy and there’s nothing wrong with that. Same goes the other way around. I’m quite masculine in my appearance, also always like more "guy stuff", it doesn’t make me any less of a women. I’m sorry I just don’t get this bigender label. Watching this from afar it seems like what it mean or look like to be a man or woman is becoming very restricted again and you have to fit this and this criteria or else you re queer something ( I know this is also very much debated in the lgbt community nowadays but I just hate that word, it was used as an insult and I personally don’t want to associate myself with it). Now I do think jm and jk gender nonconformity is an indication of them possibly being gay/pi (there’s a link between gender non-conformity and homosexuality/bisexuality) but that tattoo was probably more used an an indication of bisexuality in my humble opinion(I have a bi friend who actually have that sign tattooed, some ppl use it for bisexuality indeed). Sorry if I was a rude or anything (English not being my first language also) but I just see all those new labels in the western lgbt world and it just confuses the hell of me cause it seems sometimes pretty regressive, I just wanted to share my perspective.

Hi anon, Thank you for sharing your perspective with us. As a cis bi/pan woman of a certain age, I feel what you're saying - pretty keenly, actually. Because sometimes I just sit here like "I DO NOT GET WHAT THESE KIDS ARE TALKING ABOUT".

THIS IS GONNA GET LONG AND NOT HAVE PICTURES KIDS SO CLICK IF YOU WANNA.

Still here? Cool. It's not that we didn't HAVE a whole ass Kinsey scale but it only goes 1-6. Straight. Heteroflexible or Will Experiment At Parties. Bi. Homoflexible or Gay For Play. Gay. Supergay. That's ... what we had, in the day. I'm actually a 2.5 probably. And for years we did, we used numbers if we were smart enough to read the whole damn thing. And gender identity was like, you're cis or you're trans. That was it. And yes. "Queer" was a pejorative. A slur. A word we saw spray-painted on underpasses and sometimes school lockers. "Gay" implied pederasty, practically, but "queer" would get your ass beat in public and not an adult would stop it. And with the advent of the HIV Plague, to which I lost every damn one of the drag queens who raised me, we got even more hate. Girls less than guys, I think, but the history is not a pretty one. You know this. We of Gen X and older are all too aware. For those who have seen "Paris Is Burning" that was kinda my life for awhile, add intensive ballet. And most of those people are dead. What we have now, in the West particularly, is a smorgasbord of options. Literally if we can dream it up someone else already has and there's probably a flag. Like, it makes me feel old and out of touch. I don't even know how to call myself half the time. Am I bi? Pan? Sapiosexual? Demisexual because I don't put out on the first date? There are TOO MANY OPTIONS FOR MY SMALL ASS. I NEED A BETTER ASS TO HANDLE MY DECISIONS. And I see why too many options and too many classifications might almost feel regressive. Like, cis men are not always traditionally masculine beefy guys who like auto racing and American football. Many cis men like pretty things too. Most drag queens are cis men, actually. But femme guys are often seen, now, as other-gendered and not just other-oriented, because that's AN OPTION NOW. And the opposite is true. My cis lesbian BFF looks and acts like a guy. I have had people tell me she seems trans to them. SHE ISN'T. G-Money loves being a woman. She also loves auto racing and weightlifting and American football and her mohawk, let her live, right? Even I really waited for her to come out as trans or at least NB and IT AIN'T HAPPENED YET. She's 47.

I understand the issue of people feeling triggered by the Q word. I do. I get it. And I respect your choice not to use it or have it used at you - if I knew your user name I'd make a note :) And I get how just seeing it feels weird and wrong. I'm getting more used to it, it doesn't bother me as much as it did a few years ago. We used to call it genderfuck and honestly that makes as much sense. Now, to the guys (we're gonna go ahead and call them guys): my reasoning for thinking Jimin might be bigender is because he has all but told us that gender is a fluid construct for him. Yes, he identifies publicly as male, but even in interviews has openly said he feels more comfortable with the feminine parts of his personality in the last few years. That doesn't mean he isn't a man. And he may well be coding bisexuality - the issue there is that he so rarely has even appeared to show any interest in women, and he has openly coded for both sexes as gender (Illecebra and Arcanus). As to Jungkook, I think he's a gay cis male who also likes to feel pretty sometimes. Hell, he and Jimin both could easily fit that descriptor. And that's basically what they've said in public if you leave Filter out of it. But to be fair, these are men who have yet to come out. We forget that sometimes. THEY HAVE NOT COME OUT. Either of them. As far as we can prove they are cis straight men who like to sleep together and stay up all night and go on dates and give each other hickeys and kiss each other and hold hands and have inside jokes about "you are me I am you" and "we don't know what we do but we do stuff" and and and. I mean okay, we're not blind and my Korean source is telling me they are pretty damn open, just nobody talks about it, in Korea. But we have to remember that until they SAY something we can't PROVE anything. I mean until the sex tape leaks. ANYWAY I have blabbered on long enough, but thank you for your words and the transparency you had to share them with me.

[eolewyn1010]

We hear from Mina! Mina, my beloved! They're on the train to Exeter and Jonathan takes a nap while Mina reflects on all the stuff that has been going down. She tells us of yet another burial, Mr. Hawkins' in this case, how cheerful. After that, the two of them went on a walk. For reasons I can't quite grasp, Mina thinks it improper that Jonathan is holding her arm on a walk? Uhm, why? Isn't that a pretty common behavior among married couples even for the time or am I thinking of the wrong thing? "the way he used to in old days before I went to school" concerns me more; sure hope she means as a teacher, not as a pupil... The queer dreams stumble in belatedly when Mina takes the opportunity to eye a beautiful girl for a while - but the universe begrudges her the little joy because Jonathan near about gets a heart attack on the spot. Jealous? Nah. Only Mina shares her taste in women with Dracula, as we already tragically know. And as Dracula is staring at the same girl Mina is admiring, Jonathan has recognized his torturer despite the rejuvenation cure and has an understandable PTSD lapse. Stoker won't take my sympathy, so he has to cram some weird racist phrenology bs down my throat. Mina informs us that "his face was not a good face; it was hard, and cruel, and sensual"... sensual is a bad thing now? Right, sexual predator Eastern European foreigner. Onward.

Our panicking Victorian himbo tells Mina that this is Dracula, but the latter goes off to have a sip of the aforementioned pretty girl and Mina takes Jonathan the other way so he can calm down, take a nap, and regain his good mood as he simply forgets about the encounter. Human memory is a strange thing when it meets with trauma. Mina worries about him and, on the train, contemplates opening Jonathan's diary that she has sworn her heart and marriage on to never open. That can't be good for the sacred vows. But Mina is, for now, busy with grief anyway as she finally learns upon reaching her destination that Lucy and Mrs. Westenra have died. She learns it via a wire by van Helsing, whom she doesn't even know. Man, this is a horrible way to hear your best friend died while you were abroad.

Jack is depressive, too; funerals are done (and if I didn't misunderstand van Helsing's weird phrasing too much, the clergymen couldn't keep their eyes off of Lucy during the ceremony). Arthur has left, together with Quincey Morris (whom Stoker uses as an example on what fine men America breeds - I'll abstain from a comment), leaving our poor Doc behind to uphold this corner of the polycule all by himself. Van Helsing is gonna return to Amsterdam for yet more preparations; we all know how smoothly things go in his absence. At least he had a good laugh after the funeral. Arthur said in his lament that he felt Very Married In The Eyes Of God to Lucy after all because he gave her his blood. Van Helsing finds this hilarious because it would mean that he, Quincey, and Jack were also married to Lucy. And that's just ridiculous. I'll keep calling them the polycule though; it is a strange approach of Stoker to call this notion out as idiocy in-universe when he has done his very best to drive home the point of "vampiric blood sucking = sexually predatory behavior". So, is van Helsing just plain wrong about this, or is Stoker trying to clean up the poly and queer tones so his protagonists stay respectable?

Also, this bit: "[van Helsing] laughed and cried together, just as a woman does. I tried to be stern with him, as one is to a woman under the circumstances; but it had no effect. Men and women are so different in manifestations of nervous strength or weakness!"? Now of all times, Jack the uber emo gets sexist about men showing strong emotions? Onward again!

A convoluted metaphor is delivered by van Helsing and- he's married?? To a woman whose "wits are all gone"?? He had a son who died who would be about Arthur's age now?? I just. Whut. No wonder he was so eager to hang onto the polycule, oh my God. He's lost his whole family! I can't get over that, even while van Helsing himself makes fun of the idea of polygamy. Personally, I think Lucy would have liked that notion a lot; she certainly would have made a corner of her heart and home free to include him alongside her other three men. Jack is not too thrilled with van Helsing's humor, but is sufficiently appeased by his explanation that he just has to take the chance to laugh when he won't get much reason to for a long time. Farewell is said, ways are separated, and Jack remains alone and dreary. He closes out on the note that he's done with romance for his life, and will not continue this particular diary as it was about Lucy. Also, because his coping mechanism is being a workaholic. Good luck with that, my dude!

[diedbutterflies69]

Cars- Bang Chan imagine

Contains: explicit sexual contact, chan as hot rich hotel owner, car sex, slight degradation, blowjob, fingering, etc

Minors don't interct.

Working in one of the most expensive hotels in the country was something you never expected. You were just a normal student who was struggling to meet deadlines and pay for tuitions and so doing many part time jobs. A law student washing dishes in random restaurant and drooling over food, observing the way those chefs used to work with wok , deep fried food, the process fascinated you so much. Even though you were familiar with cooking since a young age it was rather more like responsibility, a chore. And that's how you learned cooking by slowly observing the chefs and utube videos, as changing the entire career dreams at the last year was little too wild and impossible. But struggles eventually leads to happiness, the owner of one of the restaurant you used to work at got surprisingly close with you ,her name lucy a single divorced hot milf she thaught you many skills and tricks with cooking. Your last straw before quitting the law school was getting failed . And just like that a blessing in disguise. She noticed how dishearted you were and then decided to give you the greatest opportunity in your life.

Working in God's menu was every chef's dream, and Lucy made your dream come true. The owner and main chef of God's menu Bang Chan was close with Lucy and just by that using some connections you got yourself inside that paradise, but Chan was a total boomer with you, he didn't wanted to give you job at the first place as you lacked experience and knowledge but he valued friendships way too much to deny Lucy.

Chan was always hard on you, constantly making you work with him, teaching the mystery behind flavours, making you memorize foreign cuisine recipes, you sweared you didn't even struggled that much in law school as there was no one lecture you and expect from you. He acted all tough just to make you perfect and eventually became close, you fell in the pit of one sided love the moment Chan agreed to hire you. What you adored most about Chan was how he always made sure to not make you panic while being near fire, never told you to hurry while cutting vegetables. His this small gestures meant so much too you. And in span of 7 months that baby was finally your boyfriend. Chan was someone who followed his heart and just like that, he confessed in the most cheesiest way possible. And here you are today a great chef with lot of knowledge and a handsome, caring and loving boyfriend. 3 years of loving relationship.

"baby~~ " you said while hugging your boyfriend from the back who was too invested in making a 4 tower cake for his best friend's wedding even though he wasn't much experienced with baking whatever he tried doing was no less than perfection.

"yes, baby? Need anything?", Chan asked you. Even though you have been listening to his sweet honey voice since years it never failed to make your heart flutter.

"stop working now, it's 2:30 am let's go home now", you whined slightly tipping on toes and kissing Chan's neck. Getting a small hum from your boyfriend.

"just few more minutes babe", Chan said turning back and softly giving pecking your forehead . You huffed in response being too tired of your boyfriend's night owl tendencies, you went back to the table and singing a good night in most extra way possible. Chan just smiled at his girlfriend, he too wanted to go home and just cuddle with you but work was trash .

Finally looking at clock it was 3 :15 something, his work finally done. After cleaning up every thing,washing the dishes and shoving the massive cake into refrigerator carefully, Chan happily made his way to you. He too saying baby~ in most extra way possible, he was an true night owl no matter how much he worked at nights without you being by his side he wasn't able to fall asleep. A habit he picked up 3 years ago.

"get up, it's 5 am", Chan whispered into your ear while aggressively moving you to make you leave your dreamland.

"aggh, good morning the love of my life", you said slowly leaving your subconscious world. Even in slight unconscious mind you were flirty and cheesy.

"good morning, it's 5 A.M ", Chan again told you a wrong time just messing up with you.

"what the fuck", you yelled being angry on your boyfriend's crazy work habits , you were glaring at him till he bought his his wrist infront of your face . His watch reading 3 : 08 , being confused and worried for your wrong vision you looked at the wall clock that to read 3:07 am.finally realising you have been scammed.

" you fucking lier", you yelled at Chan for pranking you, but you were glad that he finished the work soon.

"heheh", Chan laughed, he was too cute for you.

"let's just go home", you said trying to keep a poker face, packing your stuff then gripping Chan's hand and walking out of the space.

Going down through the elevator, Chan unleashing his 50 shades enthusiast.

"What is it about elevators?" Saying this and immediately pulling you into a deep kiss, he tasted like chocolate probably from the previous cake flavours, his tongue feeling so good while exploring your mouth, one hand at the back of your neck and the other interlocked with yours. His lips always felt like heaven.

He broke the kiss as the door opened, he adjusted your hair and outfit and locking his eyes with you giving you a warm smile, fully a contradiction to his previous action. This man's duality always suprised you.

"let's go baby~", Chan said getting out of elevator with you, hands interlocked moving back and forth, if someone saw you both they would probably think that you both are possessed, smiling and jumping like kids finally reached the car.

"let me open the door for you", Chan said with a smirk while opening the car door for you , there was not a single human present in the parking lot, creepy vibes but perfect for your both future activities. Chan entered the car and stared at you in the most innocent way possible.

"what?", You asked him giving him the same innocent eyes.

"babe, the kiss made me hard", Chan admitted almost shamelessly his eyes pointing at his pants , and yes it was a great hot site too notice.

"will you melt, till we reach home?", You asked Chan looking into his eyes hands slowly creeping to his thighs dangerously close to the not so safe zone.

"I would rather burst here than melt till we reach home", Chan said holding your hand bringing it straight over his memeber, you blushed deeply at his actions.

"Come on babe, we had done Car sex multiple times", Chan said making you blush and wet down there even more. You got a little too needy as the memories of Chan fucking you ruthlessly on the back site of the car came to your mind. Your hand still palming his cock through pants.

"hop on the backseat", you said almost breathlessly, Chan smirking at your needy , horny State. You both went on the backseat to make a great mess over there .

"aaah" , you moaned loudly as Chan slapped your left boob while sucking your neck. His teeth never failed at marking you all over, his touch was heaven especially whenever he squeezed the back of your neck or roughly groped those boobs. Detaching himself from your neck he gripped your neck in an erotically painful way and forcing you on your knees.

"Suck, use that mouth atleast one time for a good cause", Chan said , his degrading voice mixed with heavy lust. Nodding at his words , without wasting any time you bought your hands to undid his belt and zipper . Palming him through his boxers and finally releasing it from all restraints, you slowly put hs cock inside your mouth, he was really really hard. A fucking long and thick cock he had, you not being able to take him even half way as the position was slightly painful but nevertheless you started bopping your head up and down and palming the remaining with your hands. His loud groans and moans indicated that he was satisfied enough, you increased your speed, occassionally hollowing your cheeks to take him deeper every time. He gripped your head as he was close , he started to move your mouth as he pleased making you gag non stop, it hurted but you liked it so much. " You feel so fucking good, all mine", Chan said breathlessly after a final thrust and empting himself inside your mouth, his cum feeling your mouth in escasty. You sucked off every single drop not wasting anything.

Chan lifted you up from the car floor and made you sit on his lap. You looking fully fucked out, with clothes misplaced and mouth dripping with saliva and his liquid , black mascara tears running down.

"My precious slut", Chan said while making his way to your panties, your jeans were already removed a long ago.

"you want my fingers? Hmm?" Chan said as his fingers were slowly entering your pussy , his cold hands making you shiver .

"yes please sir" , you begged voice laced up with pure desperation and needily grinding on his fingers and thighs. Chan smirked again at you.

"what you want more, my fingers or my cock?" Chan made gave you 2 choices both of them heaven.

"your cock, sir please" You begged again. He finally smiles at you pure ill intention smile.

"Since you are too good girl, I should give you whatever you want", Chan said and finally bought his cock towards your tight leaking cunt slowly entering himself inside you.

"ride", Chan said and you felt like being on cloud nine. Slowly moving your hips up and down in decent speed . His cock fitted so well inside of you, it was pure bliss for you.

But without a warning Chan bought his hands towards your clit and pinching it making your whole body jolt in overstimulation.

" babe,you are too good, so deserve my fingers too", Chan said with a sadistic smile.

It's gonna be a long morning.

[vroooom2]

My French relatives refused to believe me. It's too much for their narrow minds and their dysfunctional relationship system that sent me to hell. You can't imagine the flow of my tears: it washed away all justification, and muted me forever to talk to them about my true origin: a controversial biological father and his mistress.

But YOU, thank you. My body remembers, and my nightmares as well. That's the reason why I decided to reach out to the right people with the help of precious French & Cambodian men: the Canadian & American hacking elite to uncover the truth. Forever grateful 🥲 We learn together, to make a safer, better, joyful world for the next generations, and all the persons we love and who truly love us for who we are.

Fuck the others, we don't need them. We can't lower our standards to fit their ignorant stupidity or unresolved psychological / interpersonal problems. We know the power of resilience, they don't.

We can't teach people with a fixed mindset to grow up better versions of their small tiny egotistic self, they're just incapable, their psychological safety relies on wrong beliefs. They're not strong enough to bear the necessary transitory pain that comes with the deconstruction of beliefs. The sensation is just like a spot on the face you're getting rid of in front of the mirror. It doesn't last and it can be very painful. But it's a primordial step to experience true liberation, and to be at peace with who you are and the others.

You my BFFs know what is my remedy: to take a step back and imagine the reality as a big comedy. Can't remember who taught me that when I was a protected and rescued toddler who witnessed the worst in humanity. Who was later a young woman, recognized as victim of male sexual violence by the French justice 7 years after being raped by a guy I didn't know in the street, who was arrested by a competent police team. It would have been easy to become a fascist racist hysterical feminist, because the rapist who was sent to jail is African, and the people who killed my biological parents are Russian and American, but I know to make the difference between virtuous and vicious people.

That's why cybersecurity is so dear to me. I won't be held down. I don't care what people think of me, I know my worth and my strength. I know where I come from and what I overcame to see the bad and good in humans, and the value of being true to myself and loyal to those who have respected me, my privacy, and helped me to become who I am.

All what I ask to those who prejudge or judge me is as simple as that:

Because IAM

Go Fuck Yourself you ignorant dumb asses: Medusa and Reid Fleming you just mediocre frustrated jealous piece of shit who definitely know nothing. You're emotionally unsafe persons who hide behind online crass personas, and who used what I built for your own selfish egotistic limelight. I don't need public apologies, you don't deserve to use my name a second time. You're the parasite and virus, I am not.

If you need proofs, just ask Xavier Niel to look in Free servers to find all the emails and legal files. He's a billionaire, and he supports my project, because he's a better hacker than you two degenerated poor Americans with hundreds of stupid gross cheap sheeps followers who stink.

As you're not interested in anything outside your intellectually limited borders and you obviously can't fluently read nor speak a second language, Xavier worked for the French CIA and a French President. He knows the true value of education, he finances a tuition free programming school to hack you all.

[calciumcryptid]

I Have Elected to Ignore Midnight's Death

Polarmare's First Day

It was the first year Kenta would be teaching at U.A. A longtime friend of hers requested to take up the open teaching position, and who was Polarmare going to deny a change of scenery?

Besides, her sister lived in Japan and was elated to know that the Fuyuhito sisters were getting back together so that was the housing situation solved in under five minutes.

U.A. paid good as well which was good for a single mother like Kenta. She adored Seko with all her heart from the first time they met in Japan two years ago when she saved him from prison. Sure the paperwork was a bitch, but Seko loved the opportunity to meet so many different heroes.

So they packed their bags, and headed off to Japan where she was reunited with her sister.

The day after they arrived she made sure her paperwork was sorted by the Hero Safety Commission, then made sure to pick up Seko for her tour at UA.

There she met Nezu, who seemed just as crazy has he had been over the phone and her fellow coworkers.

She took an instant liking to Powerloader and Snipe as they bonded over creating weapons. Vlad King and Ectoplasm seemed chill too, and it was nice to see other dedicated teachers.

Midnight was cheering about another woman on the staff, though seemed to deflate when Kenta snipped her sexual flirting at the bud.

Present Mic was loud, but reminded Kenta of a friend in America so the familiarity was nice.

It was interesting meeting All Might after seeing his last stand on the news, but Kenta hoped they would be able to get along even if he seemed like a bumbling mess half of the time.

Recovery Girl was alright, a bit jaded but it was hard to find a hero so old who wasn't.

Aizawa seemed like someone she needed to keep her eye on, his knee jerk reaction upon learning she was an international hero was hostility while he worked under the impression she was a spotlight hero.

With a swing of her axe, and a clarification of the fact she was a Neighborhood Hero who worked mostly under Rescue and Underground terms, he simmered down real quick.

The General Ed teachers seemed chill, and Kenta hoped she would be able to grab some drinks with them after a long day of work.

Seko loved every one of the them, and was excited by the prospect of their quirks though Kenta made sure to cover his eyes and ears whenever Midnight was in the room.

After final arrangements with Nezu, she was given the dates of the entrance exams. The Fuyuhito family left in good spirits.

The day of the Management Entrance Exam came around, and Kenta came in her formal hero uniform. She took a seat beside Snipe and Powerloader, and was introduced as Polarmare.

Polarmare watched as potential students came in to present one by one, and she made notes. At the end of the day after helping the potential support students present Polarmare was happy with her picks.

It wasn't over though as she spent a while in her new office she looked at each students history, made a few calls, and at the end picked out a good sixty for the first years.

Sixty may seem extreme, but there were many parts of management and business so they wouldn't all be in one class.

She went home to tend to her son, and went to see the sights with her family.

The day of the hero entrance exams arrived, and Polarmare took a seat in the viewing room. She studied the motions of the potential students, their interactions, and was pleasantly surprised to see Nezu took her suggestion of making Rescue Points public and hiding a new type of points known as Cooperation Points.

The big scale robot had been toned down a bit, and at the end Polarmare had a few qualms but didn't have any outward complaints.

Eventually, the first day of the school year came around and Polarmare did her introductory presentation. She explained each branch of management and business, the schedules, and sent them on a tour with Snipe of the business building.

While that occured, she had a meeting with the votes on representatives and outlined what she expected of each of them. She was pleasantly surprised to find them ready to meet the challenge, and was off once again.

She let the students spend the first week exploring the changes she made, and getting used the renovated building. She didn't see the need to challenge them too much considering they were in a new environment.

At the end of the day, Polarmare made her way to the Conference Room and took her place. The first thing she noticed was a lack of Gen Ed teachers present, which concerned her.

Snipe and Powerloader seemed surprised to see her there, and it was Snipe who leaned over.

"The Management teacher usually doesn't come to these meetings as they center primarily around the hero course."

Polarmare took in the words before responding, "Business and Management is a huge part of heroics so I believe I should be present for any meetings regarding the Hero Course."

Snipe nodded, and straightened back up.

After a couple more looks, the rest of the teachers settled down to prepare the meeting.

Nezu got up on his little podium, and smiled. "Welcome to the first hero course meeting of the year. Since we have a new teacher with us this year, I would love to hear her thoughts on how she plans on interacting with the hero course."

"First, may I record the meeting?" Polarmare asked. "I work better if I have audio to listen to afterwards."

A few of the teachers gave each other looks, but Nezu nodded.

Polarmare tapped her recorder before she stood up. "I plan on calling the second year students to the business building to discuss their media presence. With permission from you and their gaurdians, I want to make sure they have profiles set up on Hero Watch. It would be good for them to interact with other heroes, and it will open internship and work study opportunities for them."

Nezu hummed, "Permission granted, you may start as soon as you can."

"Once I get their gaurdains approval," Polarmare resaid with a firm stare. "I shall send out the email tonight, and set up conferences if needed."

Polarmare noticed some of the teachers looking at her in confusion, but she made her notes.

The rest of the teachers went around, and Polarmare made her notes. Admittedly more on their body language then what they have to say.

The last person to talk was Aizawa. He stood up and gathered a couple of papers.

"All of the expulsion forms have been filled out." Aizawa passed them around towards Nezu.

Polarmare slammed down her hand before they could be passed the final length. She turned them over to look through them.

"Polarmare, may I ask what you are doing?" Aizawa asked through gritted teeth.

"You know Eraserhead, this seems quite light for expulsion papers. I see a distinct lack of reference to any evidence or record of you meeting with the student to discuss the expulsion."

"What are you talking about?" Aizawa asked.

"According to the Student Rights, the student should be made aware of their expulsion with any evidence before they are expelled." Polarmare looked over to Aizawa, "I assume this is the first time Nezu has seen these, so I also assume he has been expelling students based on your word without a meeting or evidence."

Aizawa stared Polarmare down, "U.A. does not work on the regular rules schools are legally allowed to abide by."

Polarmare shifted the papers in her hand, "Actually, Student Rights apply to all schools. If this is the case, and you have been expelling like this, it is a miracle you haven't been sued."

"Nezu handles the lawsuits," Snipe said.

"Ah, that explains that. Let me clarify, it is a miracle that someone who outranks you hasn't caught on and sued you." Polarmare adjusted her posture, "Now what is your reasoning?"

"The students show a lack of potential," Aizawa stated matter of factly.

Polarmare raised an eyebrow, and waved her hand. "And?"

"What more is there to say?"

Polarmare sighed deeply. "Tell me Eraserhead, how do you measure a concept as abstract as 'Potential'."

"A series of trials," Aizawa stated.

"Yeah, I saw those trials being performed. I noticed that they are all physical. Are you saying you are measuring potential on how physically experienced your students are?"

Midnight giggled.

Polarmare shot a glare before turning back to Aizawa, "I am going to look through these students and read out loud their quirks."

"This is uneccesary-"

"Marinette, this quirk allows the user to control those with human intelligence or faux human intelligence like robots as though they are simply puppets. Hmm, I don't see how this could apply to something like a grip test or ball throw. Though this could be a way to give heroes confidence or maybe even to control villains. This student sounds like a great Underground or Neighborhood Hero if they so desired.

"That is only-"

"Oh! Gnaw. This one is interesting. This quirk gives the user sharp appendages as long as they are made out of keratin on some level. Can't think of how this would help a sit-up, but imagine there was a super strong net that could be useful. This student sounds like an amazing Rescue Hero if they so desired."

"Two-"

"Slowdown, a quirk that allows the user to slow down anything that is moving. That is amazing on its own, and if they know how to dismantle robots in the time allowed they have to be some sort of mechanical genius! They could go down any hero path they wanted and he so successful. A shame I can't think of how this would help on any trials unless they were sabotaging others. Were they sabotaging others?"

"No," Aizawa said.

"This is a bad trend Eraserhead," Polarmare warned. "Of course if you insist on wanting to expell them, then why don't you allow me work out some private study transfers. I know what, like five? Ten? Twenty? Probably like something hundred pros who are on the waiting list that would love to work with some of these quirks."

Aizawa glared at her.

"Then again why is there such a focus on their quirks? Oh! I know, it is because you don't care how they act if Mineta and Bakugou is anything to go by." Polarmare said. "Don't think I've noticed the large amount of tapes and complaints filled out regarding them."

Polarmare looked up at Aizawa, "I'm just saying there is some good evidence here to create a good quirk discrimination and abuse of power case. Unfortunately for you, I happen to be friends with a lot of lawyers and reporters who don't exactly love UA and would love to get their hands on this information."

"Nezu!" Aizawa shouted.

Nezu who was blankly smiling throughout the whole exchange looked at Aizawa. "What? She has a point, and we can not take another hit like this to our reputation. Polarmare you have permission to disband the expulsions."

"Thank you."

"Oh shit," Present Mic muttered but it was audible due to the complete silence of the room."

"With that, I believe this meeting shall be adjourned. I employ you all to spend some times to reevaluate your students."

Polarmare collected her notes, and looked over the expulsion sheets. She wasn't lying before, she was sure she could find some good mentors for these students depending on what they want to do. She'll have to add those meetings to her calendar. Maybe Seko had some ideas, and her sister would probably snatch up one of th-

Something ling and grey wrapped around her mid section, and she didn't have to turn around to know who it was.

"Eraserhead, what do I owe the pleasure?" She turned her head to see his eyes aflame with red.

"I have been managing my class like this for years, and I do not appreciate you coming in here and dictating what I can and can not do."

"I do not dictate it, the law does." Polarmare sighed as she looked at his eyes. "Cancelling my quirk is useless considering it isn't and offensive quirk," She pointed out.

Aizawa let his capture scarf wrap back around his neck as he blinked. He stared at her with narrowed eyes.

"Bakugou is a perfectly fine student, and I do not see why you brought him up-"

"The boy has a record of telling people to die, I don't care if it is his thing it fucks with your head. Not to mention the physical assault and berating he does, because unlike you I read the complaints."

"The complaints are useless, I judge my students without any prior knowledge."

Polarmare raised an eyebrow, "Does that include background checks because I thought UA prided themselves on those."

Aizawa gritted his teeth.

"If that is all, I need to get home to my family."

[runningdownthatroad]

I just have to get this off my chest after seeing some very disturbing posts about 9/11 floating around on my dash as well as some truly crude commentary. A lot probably won't agree with my sentiments but I feel like this needs to be said.

I've seen a lot of things on Tumblr in the past that maybe I consider to be in poor taste or don't agree with but I usually just scroll past, sometimes block for curating sake, but today is the first time I truly was shell-shocked. To see the memes and blasé jokes people are making about this day are just absolutely horrific and appalling.

I get that a lot of people on this site now may not remember what happened that day and only learned second hand through school or media or other people telling them. I get that a lot occurred after this that wasn't right which we definitely should be learning from. I also get that there is a lot of anti-American and anti-white sentiments going around currently, especially on this site.

But here's the thing:

Not only Americans died that day. Not only white people died that day. That's the thing about terrorists and what these hijackers did: they don't care about your skin color, your culture, your religious preference, your sexual orientation, your gender orientation, your age, your economic status, your personality, whether you support them or not, your political persuasion, your job, or any of it. Everyone is fair game to them. For crying out loud, look at what the Afghani people are currently going through and how the Taliban are treating their own country's people, women especially. If you think this is bad (which it truly is), have you seen how things went under their rule before 9/11 even happened? Do you know their terrifyingly violent and brutal history? Women had acid thrown in their faces if they didn't wear a full hijab. People were mutilated or executed if they didn't fall in line with the law of the Taliban. And this doesn't even begin to go into Al-Qaeda or Isis. But I'm not here to talk about that or delve into that topic too much.

My point in mentioning all of this is that white Americans weren't the only ones that were killed that day. People of all faiths, of all colors, of different countries, died that day, too. And the unity that is consistently discussed every 9/11 anniversary is in regards to us being aware of that fact, us mourning all of their losses together, and the collective desire to come together and help once the planes hit and after the towers collapsed.

So when people say "why am I supposed to cry over white Americans getting killed that day" think about that. Not only white Americans died that day. And regardless of their color, their nationality, their culture, their religion, etc. anyone dying is always sad. Whether it be a jetliner being used as a weapon that crashed into their floor or someone dying of cancer or someone being killed in a mudslide or someone dying in a car accident -- it is always sad. And empathy should always be shown in response, even if it doesn't impact you personally. Let's not forget these people have loved ones that got left behind, that are still here.

So when people say "if something knocks into a cow and knocks it over, I'm not expected to care, but if something knocks into a building and knocks it over, suddenly I'm supposed to care?" think about that. People aren't grieving two large pieces of steel architecture. People aren't saying "always remember those two towers". The WTC Towers were a symbol (yes, for American wealth, I get it) but became so much more of a multi-faceted powerful symbol after 9/11. The towers represent a way of life before 9/11 happened, but more importantly they represent the people lost that day, who were in the towers when they collapsed. For all of the first responders who were stuck on those floors still trying to help evacuate people to safety when the buildings finally gave. The two footprints and two blue lights aren't a symbol of American wealth or a naivete and simpler way of life pre-9/11 - they are a symbol of memorialization for that day. The Freedom Tower was erected to show that despite the loss of that day, we stood united (even if there seems to be more and more division these days). It's a message to the world that yes, destruction and death happened that day in NYC, but so did rebuilding and life carrying on. It's a symbol of strength, resilience, and unity - something that was everywhere you looked days after this event occurred. The two towers (aka NYC) may have gotten knocked down but the city got back up. They weren't kept down - that's the point of the Freedom Tower.

When people say "I don't understand, what is it that I shouldn't be forgetting since I can't remember it anyway" here is what we all should be remembering despite our age or our connection (or lack thereof) with this event:

2,997 innocent civilians died that day. Among them were 343 firefighters, 37 police officers, 23 Port Authority police officers, 8 EMS workers, and 4 other first responders. Also among them were 246 people on the four planes that crashed.

The passengers of United Flight 93 made a choice to fight back against the hijackers and saved lives that day by sacrificing their own.

Many children lost parents. Many parents lost children. Many brothers lost sisters, and many sisters lost brothers. Many spouses lost their significant others. Many lost friends, family, and loved ones.

For those who want a better connection to this day who didn't experience it and/or don't remember it, and for those others who are seriously lacking in empathy: yes, it was a highly publicized event due to the hundreds of cameras (including media outlets) watching that day, but if the horrific images aren't enough to garner some of your empathy, then there are plenty of other resources at your disposal. Documentaries like 9/11 by James Hanlon and the Naudet brothers, 102 Minutes That Changed America (which shows you not only all of the first-hand eyewitness accounts that day but also lets you hear 911 calls, radio transmissions between firefighters, and people's reactions to the event and each other who were there), 9/11 Firefighters (on Discovery Plus) and even more recently, 9/11: The Turning Point (on Netflix) which provides a 360 degree view of the events that led up to 9/11, 9/11 itself, and what came after, displaying all different viewpoints. You can read the 9/11 Commission Report or there are several books and memoirs out there like Wake-Up Call by Kristen Breitweiser, or even historical accounts in books, newspaper articles, and online. But most importantly, listen to people's stories. The ones who were there, the ones who saw it happen, the ones who ran in to help, the ones who lost loved ones. That is the most important part and the most powerful. On Hulu, ABC News ran segments of 9/11 Twenty Years Later, "Women Of Resilience" being especially powerful. It's hard not to feel a human connection to these stories or any kind of empathy.

For those who are making these jokes and memes, if you like shows like 9-1-1 and Chicago Fire, etc, imagine those first responder characters rushing into those buildings to save lives and losing theirs in the process. If you don't remember 9/11 or feel any connection or empathy, imagine hundreds of Bucks or Eddies or Bobbys or Hens or Chimneys dying that day as they worked to save so many. Sorry to be so blunt because I love those characters too, but do you get a little bit of the connection now? Do you feel any empathy? I'm not trying to equate real life heroes and sheroes with fictional characters of course, but if it helps you to understand a little better in some way, well...I'm throwing it out there.

I myself lived in the Tri-State area at the time of the attacks. I remember seeing the second plane seconds before it crashed into the second building. I remember the devastation I felt watching the first tower collapse knowing that a loved one was most likely inside and how hard I cried thinking he was dead. (thankfully, he had been late to work that day and he got out of the area before the towers came down) I remember the relief and gratefulness we all felt hearing from him to assure us that he was alive when he finally was able to get to a phone, stating he was covered in dust and ash from the buildings. I remember the panic and fear we all felt, thinking the world was ending and we were all going to die, that this was it, this was World War III, after it was confirmed that the Pentagon had also been hit and there was also a downed plane in Pennsylvania. I remember the grief another loved one suffered because she lost her entire floor (she had been out sick that day) and every single one of her co-workers. I remember the race to pick up children from school and get them home as soon as possible. I remember the rage that coursed through us seeing the footage of some people in certain countries celebrating the attacks in the streets, enjoying the deaths of so many Americans, a couple of these countries who lost citizens themselves in these attacks. I remember the camping out in front of the televisions night after night for a week straight afterwards, watching the news 24/7, worrying that there might be more attacks. I remember the feeling of sheer terror anytime a plane was heard overhead or seen appearing low enough in the sky that you could practically make out which airline it was for months afterwards. I remember seeing the lights the first time they were lit from our home. I remember feeling pure fear not only for what happened that day but also what came afterwards (not yet understanding that these weren't practitioners of Islam that did this but radical extremists who had literally hijacked the religion). I remember seeing the devastation at Ground Zero through a tear in the fabric over a fence as we walked through the city months afterwards. I remember not wanting to fly for years. I remember the anger I felt that our government had failed us due to political bs between agencies and countless others (which we found out especially when the 9/11 Commission Report came out) and that because of this horrific and absurd failure, thousands of innocent people had died. I remember seeing the crushed ladder truck, and the toy of the little girl who was on one of the planes at the 9/11 Memorial Museum and all of the pictures in that room that just floored me. (I also remember being pissed off that many were treating it as a selfie op where they were allowed to take pictures, completely missing the point of the museum's existence) But most of all, I remember feeling that life would never be the same for any of us ever again, and that the feeling of safety we had naively enjoyed on September 10, 2001 would never return.

But I also remember the compassion and unity we saw rising in the country after those attacks. I remember the gratitude for all of our first responders, those we lost that day and those who were still with us, actively working to recover those lost and to clear Ground Zero. I remember the feeling of collectiveness, that we all shared grief and showed support to one another in those days afterwards. I remember the fallen heroes and sheroes who ran into those buildings, who were off duty but raced from wherever they were that day to come and help. I remember The Man In the Red Bandana aka Welles Crowther (and many like him who worked to save others) who has become another important symbol of that day. I remember hearing all of the stories of people helping one another before and after the towers collapsed. I remember the good that this day represents. That while we may have seen some of the worst of humanity that day in the form of violence, death, weaponized airplanes, and devastation, we also saw the very best of humanity in the form of our first responders and people helping one another.

Look, did Islamophobia happen? Yes. Was it right? No, absolutely not. As I stated above, I myself feared the idea of the religion until I was educated by a friend of mine about the difference between the religion and extremism. This form of hijacking ideology can be seen in examples like the Westboro Baptist Church or even Hitler. Terrorists do not represent the true spirit of Islam no matter what the former tries to force people to believe. Just as the WBC is not the true spirit of Christianity, and so on and so forth. But even during the time I had feared the religion before gaining understanding and clarity, I never confronted or mistreated any practicing Muslim or Arab-American. Ever. I never posted hate or spewed vitriol against them. Just like with the current pandemic, I still cannot believe there are people out there attack Asian-Americans as if this whole thing is their fault. That's still mind boggling to me and it is absolutely 100% WRONG. It should not be happening. Same with Islamophobia. And it breaks my heart to read that many Arab-Americans and practicing Muslims still worry when this anniversary comes around that they may be attacked. It might not mean much, but I just want to say I am truly sorry for that and you have my full support. Always.

Did we go to war and was it just? Yes we did go to war. Was it just? Afghanistan? I need more information in order to have a fully-formed opinion but there are plenty who say yes and plenty who say no. Plenty who say we made things better over there (before we exited and the Taliban advanced) and plenty who say we didn't and only made it worse. I truly cannot say which assertion is correct and I think it would be narrow-minded and completely moronic (and possibly arrogant and presumptuous?) of me to speak on a subject I know so little about, one way or the other. Iraq? No, I don't think it was just and I honestly wish we could go back and do things differently.

But coming back to 9/11 and what this day means for so many, the people who died, the people who rushed headfirst into danger, the people who lost their loved ones. We saw incredible bravery, selflessness, and compassion for your fellow human that day despite what happened. We saw the strength within ourselves despite the fear and anger. We saw resilience. That is what the anniversary is meant to be a reminder of. The sacrifices, the loss, the courage, and the strength. Black, White, Gay, Straight, Christian, Muslim, Man, Woman, Young, Old -- it didn't matter. We all came together.

So regardless of whether it's the cool thing to do right now on this site (or elsewhere) to hate on America or 9/11 or white Americans or the anniversary itself on the very anniversary of these attacks, I ask that you please consider when posting these hurtful (and frankly harmful) words of hatred and vitriol such as referenced above that there are people out there who lost their loved ones on 9/11, that yes some of them may be on this very site and going through the 9/11 tag, and that some of them may have even lost a loved one in either war and are again on this site reading your words. Regardless of what you think or feel, please consider them and tag appropriately if you're going to post. Please consider that some of these people are currently losing their loved ones due to 9/11-related illnesses because of the cleanup at Ground Zero. Please consider that there are children who lost a parent or loved one, or who were orphaned that day (yes, they exist, we had some in our school district) who are also on this site reading your words. Basically, please just consider and be considerate. Please stop spreading hatred on a day that happened due to hatred; please stop perpetuating that cycle.

Like Martin Luther King Jr. said, "Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that."

TLDR: Love and light, my friends. Love and light. ✌️❤️

[and-justice-for-zoisite]

I've just been thinking

TRIGGER WARNING: Brief mention of guilt tripping into s*xual interactions.

As a continuation of my post I made about my last break up, which can be found here for context, I wanted to share my experiences with depression and the issues associated with it all.

I've learned a few very valuable things with my journey through romance, and how to identify a few red flags within some relationships.

To be completely fair, my ex boyfriend has Asperger's, but that doesn't entirely excuse some of the things he put me from. As a disclaimer, I am not speaking negatively of being neurodivergent at all - i love everyone for their different and unique characteristics, both physically and mentally - but this man belittled me for things out of my control.

I've noticed a large difference between my last and current relationship. I'll speak about my last relationship first.

I wasn't allowed to talk about or do any natural bodily functions - most notably, my period which is a very significant factor in majority of women's lives. He made me feel like I was gross for menstruating, and like as a woman it was my responsibility to conceal anything like my period, being unwell and so on from the whole world including him, even though we were on intimate terms and this would obviously effect him too. He made me feel like it was something I should be ashamed of.

Another hurtful thing was that he would guilt trip me into shaving my body hair. He would refuse to have any sexual interactions with me if I didn't shave my body hair, and would then guilt trip me into giving him a bl*w j*b instead. I'm not sure about other women, but my skin is very sensitive down there and I'm not comfortable with shaving it. And as for my leg hair, I don't always have time to shave it as I'm a high school student that's going to graduate in a year and I'm very focused on law. And I just personally don't like shaving my legs, I don't feel comfortable with myself presenting entirely feminine and this helps with a sort of body dysmorphia.

And finally, whenever I wanted to talk about what was bothering me, he would always find some way to make his situation sound worse. He would invalidate my feelings by saying that his mental health was 'worse' - and even if it was or was not, that obviously didn't make me feel better. If anything it made me feel worse. I'm more than happy to support someone I'm in a relationship with - It's literally one of the bare minimum things required - but I should not have to tolerate my feelings being invalidated.

In other words, he didn't allow me to be human. But I was so blinded by the physical affection he gave me which I craved to see what was so horribly wrong with this relationship.

But my new boyfriend made me see exactly what I deserved.

When I met him, he was nothing but sweet to me. He was patient, understanding, and upfront with me. And he was the exact same when we began dating. He opened up to me about mental issues he has upfront that I will not disclose and I did the same. We both reassured each other that these things were okay, and that we would handle them and take care of each other in the process.

I could actually be human around this man. I didn't feel the need to hide anything from him - my period, my scars, my stretchmarks. Nothing. He loved and accepted me for everything I was and am, flaws and all. He gets upset whenever I defended my ex's actions, because there isn't any excuse for the way he treated me. He made me see that I wasn't the villain when my ex made me out to be. He showed me that it was okay to feel the way I did, to just exist however I wanted and do whatever I want with my body. He doesn't make me shave my body hair or guilt trip me for having it. He treats me like a princess, how a partner oughta be.

I have an odd sort of way I identify, best described as perhaps a demigirl. Those surrounding me I prefer for them to call me Leo and refer to me with they/them pronouns, but for my current boyfriend I want him to refer to me with my birthname and she/her pronouns. This is because he knows me and my body intimately and he makes me feel comfortable in my own skin. But I just don't know how I feel about the surrounding people. My ex boyfriend would've never done that for me, in fact he talked very negatively of people who identified as anything other than their biological sex.

But yeah, that's about it. I just wanted to share that.

Thank you everyone :)

[khaleesiofalicante]

Hey! I hope you're doing great Dani.

I talked to you about a month or two ago, about how I was about to take the university entrance exam, how I was not ready for it, that my parents wanted me to become a doctor but never knew what I was going through. That I was confused and I didn't know what I wanted to do, cause I thought I wouldn't enjoy medicine even if I get in. I literally didn't know what I wanted to do with my life.

You were kind enough to answer me patiently, and for that I'm really thankful to you. I came here to say, your words, helped me to get through a tough time.

I told you I didn't know what I wanted to do. And because I didn't have a purpose, I could put all of my efforts into studying. I was always a good student, but recently, it was like I had lost myself through the road.

I thought about your words, and recently came to conclusion that you were right. This is me. This is my life. And this is all I have right now. I was so stressed, because I didn't know what I wanted, but I know now, and it means even if I can't do as well as I should at the entrance exam, I can always find other ways, or try again and understood that I love law. And being a lawyer. When I was 4 years younger, I told this to my parents, but they simply said it was because of the books I read and not because it was what I really wanted. Cause obviously, being a doctor should be what I wanted. And I believed them.

It may seem stupid, or may not, but books always helped me. And reading your IWFY fic, it was like my love for law and being a lawyer came back to me. I thought you should know how great your writing is. I understood what Magnus wanted to do was what I always wanted to do at heart. And yeah, maybe it IS a fantasy, and I can't be as good as him or have an Alec with me who helps me through everything, but I guess I'm willing to try. Cause I want to fight for women rights, help the innocent win what is their rights. I want to make a change. It's ideologist, I know, but I guess I would regret it if I don't follow my dreams today.

I kinda found out about all of a little late, you know? If I had found out about what I truly wanted sooner, I could find my purpose sooner and focus on my studying better. But I'm not upset. I'm still just 18 and have a lot of time. And it's always better to face the reality, however late, than to live a lie.

So regardless of the result of my entrance exam for medicine schools, I WILL follow studying law, it what I want. I know it now. But at the same time, I've always wanted my parents proud, I told you about it before. You told me I don't owe anyone, not even them. But I guess I can't change everything that I've been taught from the beginning in a short time, so, maybe one day, I get there.

For now, their opinion still matters, so I'm gonna do all I have for the exam- which is next week btw- and if I got accepted, I will be studying both of them. I asked around and they told me it's possible so I'm not gonna sit down and let it go! I will study both of them till the day I decide which is more important to me, but I guess they won't come for a long time.

Finding out my interest in law, was like finding out a missing puzzle. I've always been told I was never hardworking enough for achieving my dreams. That everything I got was because I was lucky enough to have a smart brain. But now I understood I was never hardworking enough, because they were not MY dreams. They were other's dreams for me. And I get it, doctors mostly have a good life, and that's what my parents want for me. But I know what I need to be happy, and that's a purpose. And now I found it, and it was an amazing feeling. To think that, yes, this is it. I have found what I've always wanted to do with my life.

So, sorry again for my LONG rant, but I thought you deserve to know how much of a help you have been to someone you don't even know. And it shows how much amazing your words are. You're so kind, please never change!

And please, thanks @magnus-the-maqnificent in my behalf, she offered to speak to after my last comment, she said she was in the same situation, but I was so lost that I didn't really have the heart to do it. And now I'm kind of busy because of the next week exam, but I want her to know I really appreciate her kindness, thank you all.

PS. When I become a lawyer one day, I'm gonna print your IWFY book, and keep it in my office. Cause it means a lot to me. Thank you again! Have a great day!!!

I am so so so proud of you. I literally don't have the words to tell you how proud of you I am.

You are in the right path, my love. You have got your shit under control. And that is fucking amazing. So proud!

I get that there are many hurdles to cross. But you know who you are, even if others don't and other's might not understand. But you know it. I feel like that solves half the problems. The clarity helps. It helps so much. I am so glad you have it now.

It is NOT late for you. I work as an gender and sexuality advocate now. But I had no fucking clue that's what I wanted to do until I was 19 years old. But I figured it out and then followed that dream.

Every day I learn a little more about myself and the dreams I have keep changing. It's a not bad thing. It's a part of being human. Wanting better things and wanting to change is what we do as human beings.

It's never late to pursue the things that make you happy. Remember that. Always.

I know you want to make your make your parents proud. I do so too. Sometimes I feel like it's a biological need that we have. The need for their validation? The need to make them proud?

But remember that pride is a feeling. You can give them that feeling in more than one way. If you want to make them proud, make them proud. That's a good thing. But just remember that being a doctor is not the only way to do that. What they want is success and there is more than one way to be successful.

If this is your destiny, I wish you all the best with it. Gender law/discrimiantion law/women's law is one of the best fields out there. If you need help with this (since I work in a similar background) you know where to find me.

I know you are a good student and you will do amazingly. But take it easy. You don't have to decide now. You don't have to figure out which path you want to follow right away. I think it's very sensible of you to test both and make your decision later. Just don't push yourself too hard. Always go easy on yourself, cause no one else will make it a priority.

Finally.

Oh, my love. My heart is so full that IWFY Magnus helped you so much. He is such a beautiful man - just like Magnus in any universe. He has inspired me so many times. I've always been inspired by his kindness, his need to do better and be better.

He doesn't settle. Not for Alec. Not for anyone. Magnus knows his worth.

That's what I want for myself. To know my worth.

And that's what I want for you too.

I don't what you are going to decide or what you are going to do. But I know one thing.

You might not know whether you want to be a lawyer or a doctor.

But it is so clear to me that you want to use your knowledge, your strength and your skills to help those around you.

You want to be useful. You want to make the world a little better. Just like Magnus does. Just like I do.

Here is the thing - there is no right way to do that. You do what you can and hope it makes the world a little better.

There is a different between what you are and who you are.

What you are - whether a doctor or a lawyer - can change with time.

But who are you doesn't change.

And who you are is a good fucking person.

Good luck with your exams.

Sending you all my love,

Dani x.

[criminalminds4days]

Family Matters | Chapter 3: Trivia

Hello People!

I hope you have had an amazing week and are going to have an ever better weekend. I am so done with this week. It was really crappy and I just can't wait for the beginning of next, hoping it will be better. The only positive side is that I was able to get over my writer's block and have finished about 3 new chapters.

Anyway, enjoy this chapter of Family Matters and let me know what you think!

Warnings: Swearing, sexual references, violence and murder references, public embarrassment, and very bad jokes!

Word Count: 3.6k

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Tag list: @mcntsee @lets-be-gay-for-the-angel @evelyncade @haylaansmi @paulaern @myfandomlife-blog

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(This gif is not mine)

Chapter 3: Trivia

She closed the blinds and made sure for the fifth time the door was locked. Her breath caught in her throat and the fear and adrenaline that had rushed through her body made even Spencer Reid nervous.

"What's going on?"

"This is bad, I didn't realize the consequences of this until it was too late. I am so sorry I got you all tangled up in this mess."

"What are you talking about? What happened?"

"I-" She turned and took a peek through the blinds, ensuring there was no one around. "I did not think things through. I think it's best if you go home, that way you might be spared."

"You are seriously starting to make me nervous, please tell me what's going on, how can I help?"

"There is nothing you can do; I am basically a dead woman."

"Why? Who's after you?"

"Anna Hemingway."

"Your cousin is after you? Did she threaten you or something?"

"No, she didn't have to." She walked towards the bed and sat on the edge, still glancing every now and then, making sure the coast was clear.

After her and Spencer's victory, they had both decided to go to bed, and while the rest of her family insisted on having another dinner dedicated to the couple, they had both decided best to eat and head back to their cabin. He had finished first and decided to head back, and as soon as he was gone, the memory hit her making her mistake obvious. And the main reason she had resorted to a passive competition with the world's worst cousin was clear once again. In a hurry she had returned to their cabin, ensuring she was not being followed, and locked the door, startling the doctor.

"The last time I beat Anna at something was when I twelve. We were both auditioning for the same role in our school musical. They gave me the part." He smiled, truly excited for her accomplishment, as well as happy to learn this new fact about her. "Don't get too peppy. On opening night, at Grandma's celebration for the play, I fell down the stairs."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"Because, Dr. Spencer Reid, as hard as it is to believe, me falling down the stairs was not due to my immense clumsiness."

"Wait, your cousin pushed you down the stairs?!" He exclaimed, truly horrified. How are children so cute and so evil at the same time?

"More like, she set her foot for me to trip on, but you get the idea." She glanced back at the door and then at the man in front of her. "I was lucky, I didn't break anything, but I have a feeling that might not be the case the next time. I also would prefer not to drown or anything like that."

"But we're federal agents, doing something to you or me would be unwise."

"You're speaking of the girl that tripped me down the stairs and thought that stealing my boyfriend and marrying him was wise."

"I'm gonna double-check the door is locked."

After hours of attempting to stay vigilant, her body had given in and she had fallen asleep. Although Spencer knew the danger, to him it was as simple as closing his eyes. She knew they were trained to deal with a lot of sick people, but he didn't understand the limits his cousin would go to destroy those who she felt wronged by. Although her main target had always been her, she once had basically ended a girl's life by getting her banned from pretty much any respectable college or job position because this one had made fun of her prom dress. Anna Hemingway was one to be cautious with, and they had both just embarrassed her in front of the people whose attention she had snatched years ago. It was worse than she realized.

"Spencer, Spencer." She spoke as she slightly moved him. He growled and moved away from her, attempting to continue his slumber. "Spencer."

"No, let me sleep." He complained.

"Spence, get up, please." After minutes of silence, she devised a new plan. "Spencer!" she screamed, making him jump, falling off the bed and landing between the edge of this first one and the door of the closet. "Oh good, you're awake."

He didn't say a word, for what seemed like centuries, and she wondered if screaming him awake was not the best decision, especially as her next request would not be something he would be inclined to.

"Sorry for that, I just needed you to wake up."

"Is there a fire I don't know about?"

"No, I just thought we could go for a run." There it was, the look Spencer had only given the unsubs he despised the most. She had earned it, but that didn't mean she liked it. "Sorry, I just, Nicole had to leave, and since I have a target on my back and there's safety in numbers... I also didn't want to leave you here alone, and vulnerable. I just felt like, despite your muscles, I am concerned you haven't yet mastered the use of your body."

"I will have you know that by all accounts I definitely know how to use my body. Quite effectively if I do say so myself, and others."

After his words, her mind went to a thought she never imagined having. She wondered if he meant it that way or she was just losing it. "Good, then you can come with me." That sentence following her thoughts was probably not ideal.

"No thank you, you can do it by yourself." She needed to change the direction her thoughts were going; they were definitely not helpful.

"Spencer, please. I am honestly a little terrified, and you should be too."

"Well, I'm not. She isn't worse than any unidentified subject we've dealt with before."

"Oh but she is. She's the worst type of unsub you could think of, but ten times worse."

"What's the worse she could do?"

"Let's not find out."

After whining from him and pleads by her, they both made their way out of the cabin. The shorts he had avoided yesterday were now covering almost nothing as they jogged. This was not a good reminder of their earlier conversation, so she simply focused on something easier: her cousin's imminent revenge. She thought it would come in the form of her accidentally pushing her into the lake, or a repeat of her falling down the stairs. She was even worried this time Spencer would be the victim since he had been the one to embarrass her. Her thoughts were interrupted by deep breaths and a yelp.

"Are you okay?"

"We've been running for hours, how dare you ask me such a question?"

She looked at her watch, "We've been running for exactly three and a half minutes. Actually, we haven't been running, more like jogging."

"How long do you usually do this for?"

"Depends on the day, but from thirty minutes to two hours."

"You need help."

"It won't be as bad, come on."

"You can go on, I am just gonna sit here and have a heart attack real quick."

"How on earth did you pass your physical?"

"I got it waved."

"Cheater."

"If it isn't it the 'it' couple of the weekend!" Suddenly the one having a heart attack was not Spencer, but her. "I didn't know you guys ran together, that's so cute!"

"Yeah, truly the reason I love her," Spencer said, a pinch of sarcasm in his voice.

"How adorable." It's coming, she could feel it. "Anyway, I was thinking, since love seems to be in the air this weekend, why don't we celebrate it by wrapping up the family retreat with a trivia night!"

"What does trivia have to do with love?" She regretted the words as soon as they came out, as Anna looked at her like she might as well be six feet under.

"Silly, the trivia would be about your significant other, of course!"

"Well, that's just-"

"Wonderful, I know!" The blonde smiled, delighted by her idea. "The family has already been briefed and they are all on board, I have started taking in questions and designed the cards, so we'll all meet around the campfire for dinner, and then we'll have trivia night!" She smiled brightly and began to leave, stopping by to appreciate Spencer's figure and palming his behind as she left.

"Did she just-?"

"Yes, yes she did."

"I need a shower."

After both had showered and changed they made their way to grandmas house, alert as to anyone following them. Most of her family had moved on from spying on them, but she knew Anna and Uncle Ernie were not that normal.

"So, what did your grandma do?"

"No one really knows, I mean it had to be good to make her so rich, but by the time my uncle Ernie was born, the eldest, she was already rich enough to sell whatever business she had and become a full-time parent."

"What about your grandpa?"

"He died before I was born."

"Oh."

They sat at the same table he had been at the day before; the chessboard was still in place. She began messing with the pieces, creating the game that always made her win, courtesy of her grandma.

"I didn't know you played."

"I too began at a very young age. I haven't really played since grandma died; she was my game partner. The only one that treated me like I was a human being." She sat down, remembering the hours she spent here when Nicole wasn't around, and everyone pretty much ignored her. "She was the only one that ever consoled me for losing my dad. Losing her was just one more box to check."

"I am sorry for your loss." He placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently, hoping to convey his sympathy.

"Yeah well, by how calm Anna looks right now I guess it won't be long before I join her, so we don't have to worry about that anymore."

He rolled his eyes, a smile tugging at his lips. "So, what should we expect during this trivia night?"

"To lose, that's our safest bet."

"I don't really do losing."

"And all I do is lose, so I will be your guide this time."

The family had made their way inside, their excitement overflowing the room. She couldn't help but wish she could simply run for the hills. She knew the chances of them winning were null, because a) she needed to lose and b) Spencer and her hadn't known each other, really known each other long enough to be able to answer these questions. She wondered if that was the plan all along, that Anna somehow had found out about their lie and was using this as a means to expose it.

"Okay everybody, let's get started." Said, uncle Ernie. He wore the same clothes as their first day here. "Let us start with the competition. Since we have the newlyweds as well as the new couple in the family, I think they should make the honors."

She looked at Spencer and he smiled at her, she leaned closed and whispered. "Remember, to ease the monster, we need to lose, which shouldn't be hard, we're not even a real couple, there is no way we know enough about each other, right?"

He nodded and they both moved to the sofa that was designated as their spot, her uncle who now apparently served as the show host, handed Spencer and Tyler a buzzer, explaining whichever sounded first would get to answer the question. She mentally prepared herself, hoping she could answer enough questions to not raise suspicion but not enough to win the game, what a grand world that would be.

"Ready everybody?" everyone cheered in approval and she prepared herself. "This round is for the guys, once we finish you will pass the buzzer to your partner and at the end, we will have one round where either of you can answer. Now, the first question, what is your partner's Starbucks order?"

Spencer's buzzer went off as Tyler attempted to recall the memory. "It depends on the season. During winter and for as long as she can get it, it will be a Grande Peppermint Hot Chocolate, during the summer it will be no-coffee Double chocolate chip cookie crumble Grande Frappuccino with extra whipped cream, and no straw." She looked at him completely taken aback by his answer, how specific it was, and the fact that he knew she was a seasonal drinks person.

"Yeah, that's it." She spoke.

"Point for team FBI!" Her uncle cheered. "Next question, what is your partner's favorite color?"

His buzzer went off and the doctor spoke again, "Blue."

Ten questions later the scoreboard was 8-2, Spencer's lead, and the two questions he hadn't answered were because he decided that would be enough to lose. She didn't understand how he knew these things, or the fact that she knew what her answer for him would be, but what she did know, was that she had to be really bad in order to allow Anna to take the lead back, what she wasn't sure about anymore, was whether she wanted to let her cousin win.

"Ladies, you're up." Spencer handed her the buzzer and she smiled at him. "First question, how does your partner drink his coffee."

"That's easy. He doesn't drink coffee." She said soon after her buzzer went off. "He drinks sugar with a side of coffee, no creamer. Eighty percent sugar, twenty percent coffee."

"That is so mean to say! But it's true." Spencer agreed.

"How are you a doctor and drink so much sugar?"

"Not that kind of doctor." He clarified to the man.

"I have no idea what that means! Next question, what is the thing your partner is most proud of?"

"His job. Spencer loves helping people and using his knowledge to reunite families, he's the bravest guy I know." She smiled at him and he returned the gesture.

It was no surprise Anna was not content with the results, as the end was a 23-4 in favor of Spencer and her. As soon as the game was finished she knew that she had basically carved her own grave.

"That is not fair, they are not even really dating!" Her cousin screamed, "it's all a lie!"

"What?"

"Yeah, I know your little secret, I overheard you and Nicole talking about how Spencer was not really your boyfriend and how he didn't actually have dyslexia!"

"I-" She didn't know what to say, how had she not seen her? How could she let this happen?

"First of all, I think it is very inconsiderate of you to suggest that my dyslexia is not real. I have fought so hard for such a long time to ensure my condition didn't prevent me from succeeding, going as far as getting a Ph.D. in mathematics, for someone to simply come and question my hard work." Spencer said, seemingly very upset. "Second of all, this woman right here is the best thing that ever happened to me, and I will not sit here and tolerate you calling her a liar. We are in love with each other, and you as her cousin should be happy about it. Yet you seem so upset about her finding someone, it seems to me you're jealous, but what do I know, it's not like I can understand human behavior or anything. Oh, wait." He said, he took her hand and pulled her as close to him as she could. "Just leave my girlfriend alone, you took her sloppy second and married him, so what more can you want from her?"

The room fell silent, everyone eyed Spencer and Anna, trying to grasp what had just happened. "You and I both know you're lying, you two are not a real couple, you are just trying to ruin this weekend for me."

"Really, not a real couple? Then how did we end up destroying you at trivia? You made the questions Anna, I had no idea what was on them, you did. And I am not the one wearing a wedding ring. So my question is, how do you marry someone without knowing their proudest moment, or their Starbucks order?"

"Well, how come no one has ever seen you two kiss? You can learn facts about each other but that doesn't really make you a couple."

"You want to see a kiss? Fine." She turned and pulled Spencer's lips to hers. She let herself enjoy the moment, really enjoy Spencer's kissing skills, not because she wanted to or anything, but rather because that is how she should kiss him, there was no way anyone would have any doubt about them if the kiss looked authentic. Which it did, it also might have felt a little more authentic than it should but now was no the time to dwell on that.

Spencer kissed her back, creating an atmosphere in which her cousin's word didn't matter any longer, in which the humiliation her family had put her through was nothing worth thinking of, and the fact that both of them had such deep knowledge about each other only fueled it, melting her a little in her spot, she felt his teeth on her lower lip applying slight pressure and she couldn't help but wish they were by themselves right then and there.

"We get it! You guys want to take your clothes off, now please stop." Tyler's voice echoed, and the two doctors left each other's lips reluctantly, looking at him. "Now, can we please move on?"

"No! Not until they admit they are not really dating, and all this was a plot to humiliate me!" Anna screamed.

"You know what? I am not going to stand here and tolerate this behavior any longer. Bitchy Anna, you can whine all you want, but that will not change that I am with a man I love, and that loves me. I have let this family make me feel like less for long enough and I am done doing so. You can all go fuck yourselves because I am done with each and every single one of you. You allowed this crazy brat to humiliate me and treat me like I was less for long enough. Let's go home, Spencer." She grabbed him by the hand and exited the house, giving her family the middle finger before she banged the door. She walked to their cabin and gathered her stuff, him following suit. As soon as they were in the car and far enough away, she pulled over and sighed, coming down from her adrenaline rush.

"In the wise words of Penelope Garcia, that was hot," Spencer said.

"What was?"

"Everything." They laughed for a couple of minutes, the scene she had just created replaying in her mind. "I am so proud of you."

"Why? Because I gave my uncle Ernie the middle finger?"

"Because you stood up for yourself."

"Yeah, well even if she was right, I tend to get a little too angry when people call me a liar or get in my way."

"Yeah, I know." He chuckled, "How did it go, oh yes, 'Nu-uh bruh, I know you didn't just interrupt me mid-sentence.' And then you commented how a man who wore sweaters in the middle of July was not going to cut you off."

"I am so sorry about that; I was just so used to being cut off I didn't want it to be a thing at work."

"It's okay, I understand. I began cutting people off because that's what most people did to me when I spoke."

"Well, that's dumb. I love hearing your facts, you have all this knowledge, and you chose to share it, people should be grateful for it."

"Thank you, I appreciate that." He smiled, "Speaking of facts, our chances of getting murdered will increase by the minute if we continue to sit on the side of the road."

"Right, forgot about that!" She turned the car back on. "Let's go home, Spencer." As his apartment complex became clear, she slowed down, making a stop right in front of it. "Thank you for coming with me this weekend, I really appreciate it."

"No problem, that's what friends are for." Before he moved to get out of the car, she planted a quick kiss on his cheek. "What was that for?"

"For being the best fake boyfriend and real friend a girl could ask for." She smiled at him, so grateful for his existence. "I will see you tomorrow morning at 5:45 am sharp. Goodnight Spencer."

"Goodnight. See you tomorrow." He opened the door and walked out, waving to her before he entered his building. She sat there for a couple of minutes, taking in the past weekend. She knew her mother wouldn't let her get away with her actions, but right now that didn't matter, Spencer Reid had told her he was proud of her, he had even used the term hot which in itself was hot because she never even imagined he used that type of vocabulary.

Regardless, she stood up for herself, she let Anna have it, and Spencer was proud of her. It seemed like a win-win. She drove home, a smile on her face.

[bloodyspade0000]

30-day knb challenge: Day 1- Favorite Male character

↳ Haizaki Shougo

I am not justifying Haizaki's behaviour. I think he needs a tall glass of respect woman juice and therapy. This is just meant to explain why he is my favourite character and help you better understand him as a character. Do not send hate or take my words out of context. You will be reported, deleted and cancelled. Thank you and enjoy. :)

My favourite character is Haizaki Shougo *dodges tomatoes* a lot of people in the fandom hate this guy for many reasons. It's kind of funny how many people hate him and the amount of hate he gets just for existing. Like bruh; he's sixteen, leave him alone. 😂

His whole existence is just sad. He was literally created to be hated.

Like straight up, Tadatoshi Fujimaki even admitted that he hated Haizaki. Haizaki's sole purpose of existing is to make the Generation of Miracles look better even though they’re just as problematic as he. No one is fucking perfect and is about time people woke the fuck up and realized it. Your faves are problematic move the fuck on.

Yes, the Miracles are redeemable but so is Haizaki. Yet, unlike the Miracles, he does not get redeemable. No, he disappears and is never seen again. Like bitch, what the fuck!? if you’re gonna introduce a character to only have them disappear for a long time and either have them show up again or just never mention them again. Wasting the potential they had to be a very good character or not having them redeem themselves while the other characters who were just as fucking problematic get a fucking redemption arc because they’re fucking main characters!? What’s the point of that character even existing in the first place? What kind of bullshit is that? Just to have them exist to make the main characters look good? How the fuck does that make sense? Like where is my Haizaki redemption arc? Do I have to write it on my own? I will write it. I am writing one.

Haizaki is the only character I could relate to. Being second best, struggling to find somewhere to fit in and overshadowed and replaced by someone everyone thinks is better than you. It's fucking depressing, okay? You spend your whole life thinking you’re not good enough, and it hurts. I don't feel like going too deep into it because I don't owe you a detailed explanation of my trauma, okay?. So I'll save that for my fics where I self-project half of it onto Haizaki. It’s a coping mechanism, okay? Therapy is fucking expensive.

The anime ruined his whole character, got rid of his whole arc and shorted it down, and made him worse than he really is.

A post explaining how the anime did him dirty and goes more in-depth about his character

I am not trying to justify his actions, i.e. him manhandling Alex and beating Himura up. He does terrible shit. We all do lousy shit sometimes, but that doesn't make us bad people. Making mistakes is a part of being human, and we're supposed to hold people accountable for their actions and help them realize what they’re doing is wrong, allowing them to grow and change. Not condemn them and ostracize them, which leads to isolation and a lot of psychological trauma and self-hatred, and as someone who has dealt with—is still dealing with all three. It is not fun. It makes living painful. Highly unrecommended.

Haizaki does not have a positive role model in his life nor anybody he can turn to, everyone has already given up on him. Even Nijimura and Kuroko didn’t even try to help him, being more focused on the Miracles. (Yes, I know kuroko tried to stop him from throwing his basketball shoes away, but that doesn’t fucking count because after that Kuroko just gave up on Haiazki too). Haizaki has probably grown grew up knowing only violence and not a single ounce of kindness, turning him into the bitter and angry little boy he is.

Haizaki had so much potential. But instead of making him a great villain that potential was WASTED on fucking Kise.

Also, the Kaijo vs Seirin match in the winter cup was completely useless because Kise already got redeemed and he literally got no character development from it.

And Seirin was gonna fucking win anyways because duh thier the main characters. 🙄

Now some headcanons I think about a lot:

1. He gets abused. Some psychological behavioural consequences of child abuse are unhealthy sexual practices and juvenile delinquency, and Haizaki exhibits all three which are some external behaviours of most (NOT ALL) male abuse victims. Haizaki's a womanizer, aggressive, hostile and violent. Yet, he backs down when someone stronger than him comes around and puts him in his place i.e. Aomine and Nijimura.

a factsheet explaining the long term consequences of child abuse and neglect

How to help a friend dealing with family abuse or neglect

How to Handle Abuse

2. He's a victim. And when you're a victim, you either become angry and cynical with everything and everyone around you, swearing never to be a victim again and struggle with gaining back control of your life. Not wanting anyone to see you being vulnerable because being vulnerable makes you weak. Being weak makes you shatter. You always shatter like glass, cutting yourself every time you pick up broken pieces, watching as blood trickles through your fingers.

Your body is constantly on high alert. The default is flight or fight—survival to the fittest.

Or you bite your lip and keep your head down, bottling everything inside and looking for escapes or seeking validation. You want to be wanted and loved because you struggle with loving and accepting yourself. There's always a voice in the back of your head telling you, you're not good enough or that it's your fault. That everything is your fault. Self-hatred and self-doubt are your tormentors.

Or it's a combination between both—a constant struggle.

And I believe Haizaki portrays both from the way he acts and presents himself. Especially since his motto is literally "Survival of the fittest,” and he had once told Kuroko, " there are bad guys and then the really scary people," or something along those lines, which I believe he is talking from experience. You learn from your experiences. They either make you or break you.

3. He's touch-starved.

What Does It Mean to Be Touch Starved?

4. He's bisexual and has a lot of internalized homophobia. I can just feel his internalized homophobia rolling off of him. Bruh, I just know cuz I am bisexual, and I have struggled with internalized homophobia and still sadly struggle with it cuz I grew up surrounded by homophobic people.

I still live with them. 😭

Also, we live in a society that thinks straight is the default.

What internalized homophobia is.

5. His sexual awakening was probably Aomine or Kise. Could be both 😂?

6. He cries himself to sleep every night.

7. He's observant and a great judge of character. It's a fact. This guy literally predicted the downfall of the Miracles. Straight up warned Kuroko too. Too bad Kuroko didn't listen to him.

8. He's hilarious. When he first appeared in the manga, he literally called Himura a loser, lol. XD

9. He's a closeted softie and a total tsundere.

10. doesn't know how to react to kindness and will think you're threatening him or will feel really awkward and uncomfortable but will cover it up with his scowl, or he'll have a breakdown.

11. needs a lot of reassurance and head pats

12. swears a lot. Has no filter.

13. His bother is in the yakuza or some high position of power, and he feels inferior to him. It also explains why Haizaki gets away with things because he would have been kicked out of school if his bother wasn't either-or. I'm talking about his bother being in the yakuza, lol. XD

14. He and Momoi dated for a while but broke up on a mutual understanding that thier relationship just didn't work out. They're best friends and hang out sometimes.

15. Haizaki's good with kids and just genuinely likes them. He would be a great father and try his best to raise his kids right.

16. He gets sick really easily

17. He's clingy

18. He has no friends, mainly because he doesn't want people to get close to him because he's afraid of getting hurt again. Also, everyone in knb hates him.

19. He watches cartoons cuz he was never allowed to watch them when he was a kid. His childhood is trash, okay?

20. He hides in the closet because that's where he feels safe the most—rhetorically and literally.

21. Sleep-deprived and only runs on caffeine and spite.

List of fics that portray Haizaki better than the anime:

Heavy is the head by extrastellar

Idle Hands by DarkWoods

Another Chance by regretting my username_ (777imou_offline367)

What Matters is that We're Together by StrawFairy

06:00:00 of Haizaki Shougo (4) by ReiClien

This Is Happening by SharkGirl

What is Love by voices_in_my_head

A completely uncalled catharsis by oddball

One-shots

intertwined, under a spell by kornevable

ԼƠƔƐ & ӇΛƬƐ by Arthuria_PenDragon

delirium by extrastellar

me with you by doublejoint

Turn My Camera On by wordsliketeeth

At Summer's End by doublejoint

Taste by Hibari1_san

I Can't Get Enough of You by HisDarkSecret

I don't care if it hurts by llowsywriter

Ashes by doublejoint

broken things by lowsywriter

Series:

Finally found each other by suzakukills

This Is Happening Universe by SharkGirl

DNA by flowerway

My WIPS:

Isn’t it lovely?

Broken Crown

Love me, Love me, Love me

Grey skies

Rabbit hole

A playlist of songs that I believe fit Haizaki

Kuroko’s basketball’s manga

In conclusion, You can hate Haizaki as much as you want. But just keep it to yourself. Haizaki is my baby and I will protect him with my life.