#i am having the same problem with her writing i had with melinda's writing: she's absolutely not cold

[secretsofthemourning]

Spy X Family Theories and Predictions

Excessively Extra Over-Indulgent Long Post Warning: I absolutely refuse to call any of this a head cannon, but this is my personal analysis of some situations so far in Spy X Family and my prediction for the future of the story. I’ve watched all the anime and I am currently on volume 1 of the manga, but up to volume 9 has been released. I am aware of most of the characters and spoilers up to this point, so spoilers really don’t keep my from being invested in the manga or show. If any of my theory has already been mentioned, I would love to know, I would give me much personal satisfaction. Also, if any fan fiction writers want to tackle this one, go ahead, but as a fic writer myself, I may also write this one some day, so I’ll use my post as reference to prove I can up with it first. 

1) Yor isn’t just confused and clueless because she’s had a lack of social experience throughout her lifetime. She does lack a lot of social experience and context due to having to take care of Yuri as most of her upbringing being focused on learning how to be an assassin and a mother figure to her younger brother, but Yor is legitimately neurodivergent. I think this is great and I also think it shouldn’t have to be stated outright that Yor is possibly autistic and not as skilled at masking as most other neurodivergent women would be. There also needs to be more representation of neurodivergent characters like Yor in normal situations (or not so normal in reference to her Thorn Princess persona) because she is a very engaging and beloved character. 

2) Ostania and Westalis are definitely European countries in the 1960-1970s based on Cold War Europe and East and West Germany, this has been long established, but much of what you read in newspapers and textbooks, and in the background is in English. This is an alternate reality/history, so it can also be assumed that since ethnicities are never discussed, Westalian and Ostanian might only be nationalities. Principle are meant to stand out so of course their designs are more unique and pronounced than background characters, but Yor is the only one who bows and also bows used a manor to thank people for their hospitality, kindness, or taking good care of to his “co-workers.” Yor and Yuri are also the only characters with their same color schemes to include eye color (just as Anya is the only character of her variety to have her color scheme and her telepathic powers.) I believe that it is suppose to be hinted that Yor and Yuri are of Asian-European heritage, which is probably uncommon, but not entirely unusual in Ostania, so where as Yuri is treated more personably because he is man, Yor’s co-workers, Camilla, Sharon, and Millie, are such bitches to her not just because Yor is socially awkward, “former sex worker,” who is an “unmarried” woman at 27, but because and there is also underlying current of prejudice due to Yor’s heritage that no one wants to address as another reason for bullying. No matter how “progressive” Ostania may want to be seen as socially. (Also Yor’s beautiful and thicc and Camilla wishes she could, but that’s for a different post.)

3) Yuri “Sis Con” Briar has stated that he wants to protect his country, but will do anything to protect his sister. Anything. All the while hunting wanting to hunt down Twilight and W.I.S.E. because they are the State Security Service and Ostania’s true enemy. When Twilight is disguised as Foreign Minister Brantz and Yuri shows up as his escort, this is Twilight’s first encounter with Yuri while Twilight is in disguise. As Yor has now made friends with Melinda Desmond, Twilight is going to find himself more and more embroiled in Ostanian politics as he goes further and further into Operation Strix. Twilight will continue to find himself in situation in which he comes closer and closer to Yuri while in and out of disguise and he will eventually find himself in a situation where he can either kill Yuri and end any problems he might have to being exposed as Twilight, or he can allow reveal himself to Yuri and use his relationship with Yor to his advantage. Twilight, realizing that if he kills Yuri he could lose a valuable source of inside information, choses to exploit his circumstances and reveal his identity to Twilight to Yuri, threatening to kill Yuri if he doesn’t comply and convincing Yuri that Yor is safer with him as her husband than as a regular Ostanian citizen. Yuri, realizing that Yor being married to Twilight means she would be sparred of any turmoil or exploitation in a war, agrees to keep Loid’s true identity a secret in exchange for Yor’s protection and Secret Police intel. (Twilight would never admit his non-existent feelings for Yor stopped him from killing her brother, because it would damage any potential future between him and Yor, no never.)

4) A few years pass, and the Forgers are successfully beginning to infiltrate the Desmond’s inner circle. Slowly Twilight notices that Yor is spending more time with Melinda Desmond, which he encouraged at first (for the mission!), then he begins to notice a larger distance growing between him and his fake relationship. This does not sit well with him. Twilight begins to take matters into his own hands by doing recon only to eventually discover Thorn Princess. Twilight decides Yor’s identity must remain known only to him, so he can use it as a trump card (for the mission!) if he ever needs something to blackmail her with. Better yet, an assassin is an important asset to have on your side. Twilight has to secure Thorn Princess as an undisputed ally. Loid is going to have to seduce Yor and begin a long overdue sexual relationship with his wife. (For the mission? Yes, for the mission!)

5) Several more years pass as Yuri continues to rank up within the SSS, but he can only fly under the radar of Secret Police for so long before he hears rumors that he is going to be brought in under suspicion of being a traitor. Yuri abandons everything and Twilight takes him to a safehouse. Yuri defects to Westalis and is taken in by W.I.S.E. as an informant after excruciating and strenuous mental and physical testing, evaluation, and psychological examination. Twilight vouches for him, Handler is pissed, Yuri gets placed under Nightfall for training. Nightfall is livid, but agrees. A now 12 year old Anya experiences all of this going on in the background as Twilight is thinking through his plans and solutions. Anya tells Twilight he can’t play off Yuri’s desertion from Ostania as a disappearance and hide it from Yor. That he needs to tell Yor the truth. For the first time, the Forger family has to reveal their true selves to each other and Twilight and Yor have to come to terms with the fact that Anya has known everything all along. 

6) As Operation Strix closes in Donovan Desmond is put under public scrutiny and suspicion. Could the head of the National Unity Party be responsible for the engineered murders of other Ostanian political leaders? Leaked documents about political assassinations. Leaked documents about conferences with intentions to begin a war with the Westalis? Damian Desmond, now in his early teens, is going to have to come to terms with who is parents really are and if their actions are forgivable. 

7) After Operation Strix ceases, “Loid Forger” “abandons” his second wife and teenage daughter. Twilight guarantees his age forces his retirement from undercover fieldwork in a few years time. Anya graduates from Eden, turns 18, and is recruited by Garden to be trained and work alongside Yor as an assassin. Anya struggles with her relationship with Damian that has slowly grown less antagonistic over the years, but still has guilt over being responsible for the capture and political trial of his parents. Yor tells her that it is for the greater good and only Anya can make her own decisions about what to do. Can she live forever without being able to tell him, but still be in a relationship with him. Bond, growing old, but still very much lively has a brief flash of Becky being recruited into Garden as well, leaving it up to Anya to figure out what this means for her future and her friendship with her bestie who she never imaged in this sort of lifestyle. 

8) Twilight returns to his wife and daughter now working as an informant for wise, based out of Ostania. The Forgers finally get the happy ending they deserve. 

9) The story goes on with Anya, Becky, and Damian’s complicated ass lives. (I’m not saying I ship them, but why do I have this odd feeling that we’re going to get a Yuri/Nightfall romance sometime by the end of Spy X Family. I feel like they would just be thrown together no context, and not in story that I am envisioning in my theories.)

[onaperduamedee]

#relatable

[peterspaperplane]

//Renmeraki

I think I have told you how terrible my 2021 was. But maybe, maybe, I haven’t told you this one: it began on August.

I remember: farewells. Too many farewells. It’s always goodbyes that makes things harder, isn’t it? End of college means that people would eventually leave the city for their family, prolonged hometown, dreams, work. Meanwhile, I did not. It was my whimsical choice to stay. As I’m thinking of it now, what I wanted was not actually staying in the city; what I wanted was to succumb in the memories I had made in all over its body.

I did internships and took part-time jobs in places, so that I could manipulate my head into thinking that I was alive and useful—and to my parents: that I still had reasons not to come home (I could tell you how many times Mum begged me to and how many times I regret that I was not acting like a good kid and obey her instantly, but I am not writing that pathetic essay).

So, I am rewriting it here. I did internships and took part-time jobs in places, so that I could manipulate my head into thinking that I was alive and useful. But there was one particular time when I came to realize that I was not manipulating my head into thinking that I was alive—'cause I was alive. It was when Renmeraki Architect decided to let me in.

***

Don’t Wake Me Up When September Ends

I am still wondering whether or not being an architect was in my card since the beginning. All I can remember is that I aspire to be a wordsmith. I even did my final project in architecture with poems and silly doodles. It was a museum, that is one thing. But, combining it with fairytales? That is another thing. This might not be the most authentic idea, but pretty sure this was definitely the most un-architectural project ever.

Therefore, in my admission letter to Renmeraki, I also wrote ‘writer’ in the job proposal table and sent my sort-of-writing-portfolio next to the design one. There is still a part of me desiring it to come true, to be a writer.

But in Renmeraki, I saw people seemed to live for the sake of architecture.

Constantly, I witnessed Mas Ren—who always comes out with the most unimaginable things—tailoring his designs very precisely as though it was a fragile creature—while, time to time, ensuring that we had the most comfortable place to work in. I saw Teh Amel taking care of interior details as well as teaching me how to render from scratch; knee-deep in notes as well as keeping the conversations going on with clients (no matter how boring it was).

I saw Mas Indro repeatedly distressed and yet still enjoyed doing his daily structural works (please note that by structural, I mean that exact post and beam) while throwing jokes to the table—what a pure soul. I saw Tante Rani (a.k.a Roni) glittered in smiles when we visited her beautifully designed interior for an apartment in the city, only fifty meters from our hive. I saw Ayeng, heartfully assisting the same façade project again and again (Ayeng if u read this, u know what I’m talking HAHA); providing endless energy while helping everybody with anything: free Indomaret jastip (with Ajeng) and laughter. Most importantly, she always responds to my jokes, no matter how cringe it was (I know that this is un-architectural but I want to put it here anyway).

I saw Ajeng trying to catch up with this new world she stepped in as a student (she graduated now, anyway. CONGRATS, GVRL!) as well as the somehow-funny-confusion she regularly showed. Rei Hana Kireina, Teh Amel’s little sister (along with Ajeng, Ayeng, Roni) who always knew how to answer interior-y problems, who has the most infectious laughter on Earth. I saw Rudi, my batchmate, always ever so passionate talking about the future of architecture. And lastly, Melinda Potter (A Gryffindorian), who came daily to the office from the other side of the world, with whom I shared my first project with.

I paused. I came to think that maybe it is not that bad to be an architect. Instead, it is tempting in its way.

***

Too Many Places, Too Little Time

The sense of separating from the people whom I shared at least my two years with was horrible. It’s like you are suddenly not allowed to come to your favorite bakery before school ‘cause the cakes are too sugary and your Mum is worried from watching some random YouTube videos. It’s like losing reasons to walk to school—‘cause, what school would be without too-sugary-cakes for brunch? It was the time when I considered that maybe loneliness can be the worst feeling.

As much as I said I am an introvert, living with huge troops for several years had changed me. It was torturing to stay all day in my place. Indeed, I was somehow fear of missing out.

Then suddenly, I had busy days during this internship. Mas Rendy always told us to experience all the possible works our office is having at the moment; site visitation, architecture observations, measurement (!!!), client-meetings, project control. But the busy-ness sometimes including: casual lunch/dinner, café-hopping, beach. Suddenly, I had something worth waiting for the weekends. Always.

***

Early (Grey) Year

In the end of 2021, I gotta come back for a moment ‘cause Mum suddenly decided to die.

Mas Ren allowed me to take day-off until Mum’s 40 harian, but I refused to take. It was partially ‘cause it seemed like all of a sudden everyone had made plans for my life—that I should come back to take care of Dad (which now I regret. Why on earth would I take this stupid path), and the rest half was ‘cause I could not stand any longer in the house where I used to share my life with Mum.

Early January 2022 I came back to the city to wave my goodbye. There were new folks in the office—some were old friends from college (Cece As Ida, Ria Racing) and some are new acquaintance (Kharisma, Izzati, Sabrina). I actually met Kharisma and Izza in the end of 2021, though.

It somehow made me sad knowing that this is what’s going to happen: our lovely office would grow up, new people would always come in: interns, clients. It made me sad knowing that I ran out of time. I was offered to stay a bit longer—little did everyone knew how bad I wanted to do so, had the situation been different.

But I was also happy knowing that I took a tiny-tiny part here.

***

Train Rides, It’s Always The Train Rides

In one of our last site visitations, Mas Ren took me and Izza to Tulungagung. We took a morning train—beautiful timing. Though the sun came out in the morning, the rest of the day was gloomy—it was either raining or cloudy.

We came back at night—beautiful timing. I don’t recall who started first, or maybe it was merely because it was ‘night’: we had a talk. The serious one. That kind of talk you wouldn’t have in a normal day in office.

It always stoned me seeing people around me sharing their stories. Though it might only be small things for them, it means the whole world for me. I always believe that only people who trust you that share their vulnerability.

It’s always the train rides, indeed. It was that exact train ride that made me feel accepted in this place.

***

Hindia and the Hidden Farewells

Dad came to Malang in early February. It meant I only had less than 10 days in the city.

Within the same week of my father’s arrival, I officially resigned as an intern from Renmeraki Architect. But guess what, it was apparently also a goodbye for Kharisma and The Amel. So we had our usual ritual: presentations. Mas Ren Invited us to a coffeeshop nearby Taman Kunang-Kunang. The dress-code: blue denim and white.

I wonder, what is the color of confusion?

I was confused ‘cause I felt relieved that I was not alone taking such a weird path. However, I also took it in a very sentimental way, ‘cause it somehow was happening: people are leaving. Departures, separation—the strangest thing mundane human ever experience.

Why can’t we just live forever and never get separated?

I wonder, what is the color of goodbyes?

***

To sum up this long crap: if there’s something that I’m grateful for happening in 2021, it is that I found a home named Renmeraki—and hence including: the moments, the people (oh, and the plants. and the chairs. and the curtain. and the---). 

Ad astra per aspera, Renmeraki!

[aiorevelations]

Our First AIO Fanfiction

We recently started writing our first Adventures in Odyssey fanfiction. We hope you enjoy and feel free to share your thoughts and reactions with us, we’d love to hear them!! ❤️

A Number, Not a Name

“A couple of months after Jason joins the NSA he is finally assigned his first field mission. Eager to prove himself not only to Donovan, but also to his new partner Tasha Forbes, Jason throws himself completely into the case. However, he soon finds himself caught in a complex web of treachery, deceit, and betrayal which will force him to answer a difficult question - who can he trust?”

Chapter 1: When Duty Calls

Jason sat at his desk quickly typing up an intelligence report which was soon due to be reviewed by the agency’s leading executives. The typical office sounds of phones ringing, clattering keyboards, and co-workers chatting in their small cubicles echoing in the background. This had been his daily routine for the last couple of months ever since he had joined the agency: writing documents of the intelligence gathered on the various groups and people the agency was actively monitoring.  He was almost finished with the nearly 200-page government document when he heard a familiar voice call out his name from behind him, “Agent Whittaker.”

Jason immediately spun his chair around and his eyes came to rest on Deputy Director Donovan’s secretary, Ms. Connors. She continued, her voice in a formal tone “Director Donovan would like to see you now in his office.” 

“Oh, of course.” 

He stood up from his chair and followed Ms. Connors down a winding aisle lined with rows of cubicles on both sides, through a doorway which led into a corner office, and past Ms. Connors desk until they finally arrived at the door which led into Donovan’s private office. Ms. Connors then knocked. 

“Come in” came an older man’s voice with a Scottish accent from the other side of the large oak door. Ms. Connors opened the door and entered the room.

 “Director Donovan, Agent Whittaker is here sir.” 

“Good, send him in.” 

She then exited the room and motioned for Jason to enter. “Director Donovan will see you now.” 

“Thank you.” Jason entered the room and Ms. Connors closed the door behind him leaving the two men alone to talk.

“You wanted to see me, sir,” Jason said somewhat nervously, his eyes fixed on the rather intimidating man sitting behind the desk in front of him. 

“Ah, yes Jason. You have been working here for a couple of months now and I feel that you are ready to undertake your first field mission.” 

“Really sir?” Jason responded with a slight grin on his face, unable to completely hide his excitement. 

“Through your work here you have shown me that you possess all the attributes and qualities which I look for in a potential field agent. You’re hard-working, determined, and intelligent. Something which makes me believe that you will be able to successfully complete this mission” Donovan replied.

 “Thank you so much sir,” Jason said, truly humbled and honored by Donovan’s words.

 At that moment a knock sounded at the door. “Yes,” Donovan called out. The door then opened and Ms. Connors once again entered the room. 

“Excuse me Director Donovan, but Agent Forbes has just arrived.”

 “Perfect, just in time...send her in.” 

“Of course sir.” Ms. Connors then exited the office. 

A few seconds later a tall and very attractive woman walked through the door. She was wearing a black pencil skirt, white poplin shirt, black stilettos, and a pair of silver stud earrings. Her auburn hair, which beautifully complemented her deep green eyes, was pulled back into a sleek high ponytail. From the moment he saw her Jason sensed an air of mystery surrounding this woman and was instantly intrigued and even somewhat captivated by her. Donovan stood up from his chair and motioned with his hand towards her. 

“Jason Whittaker may I introduce Agent Tasha Forbes. She will be your partner on this assignment.” 

Tasha extended her hand to Jason “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Agent Whittaker.” 

Jason took her hand in his. “It’s a pleasure to meet you as well, but please call me Jason,” he said as he released her hand. 

“Only if you call me Tasha.” 

“I think I can manage that,” Jason said with a hint of a smile on his face. 

“Please, have a seat,” Donovan said, gesturing to the two chairs in front of his desk as he sat back down. 

“Thank you, sir,” Jason said. 

“Thank you Donovan” Tasha replied as the two of them also sat down. 

Donovan then opened the top drawer of his desk and pulled out two yellow folders. He handed the folders to Jason and Tasha who quickly opened them. 

“For quite some time now we have been monitoring events in Krudia as the country has been racked by economic turmoil and civil unrest. The perfect opportunity for an extremist political sect to overthrow the government and seize power. Recently several of our operatives have uncovered a new political group called the Krudia Liberation Front or KLF. We believe them to be a fanatical and dangerous faction as there have been reports of them buying massive stocks of weapons and recruiting numerous followers. Your mission is to gather intelligence about the KLF, particularly its leader Dalmar, their main objective, and where their weapons are stored. You two will travel to Krudia where you will be posing as Melinda Tylerson and Edward Delucas - the leaders of an illegal arms operation based in South Africa who are interested in securing a deal to supply armaments to the KLF. You both will be leaving at seven o’clock, Wednesday morning, on Air U.S.A flight AU1498 from Washington to Bulin, the capital of Krudia. Once you arrive there you will make contact with a man named Tarek Matthins, Dalmar’s right-hand man. He has been informed by one of our undercover agents of your impending arrival as well as the armaments and weapons agreement you are supposedly prepared to offer. His code sign will be Zeta Delta Gamma 7104. Do either of you have any questions?” Donovan looked towards each of them for their reply. 

“No sir, no questions'' Jason replied. 

“Same here Donovan” Tasha answered. 

“Well, then you two are dismissed. Make sure you get some rest. You’ll need it.” 

“Of course Donovan” Tasha replied. 

“We will sir” Jason responded as he and Tasha rose from their chairs. 

They began walking towards the door when Donovan quickly spoke up again while making his way to the front of his desk. “Ah, Tasha...can you stay back for a moment?” 

“Of course Donovan” Tasha replied before walking back towards Donovan’s desk. Jason then exited the room and closed the door leaving Tasha and Donovan by themselves in the office. 

“Tasha...I just wanted to ask you if you’re sure you can handle this assignment?” Donovan asked with a concerned look on his face. 

“Why sure Donovan. I’ve handled far more serious threats than this before. You can trust me.” 

Donovan looked down for a moment, sighed, and then spoke. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, Tasha, believe me, I am well aware of just how capable you are.” 

“Well then forgive me for saying this but what is the problem?... Why are you so worried about me being assigned to this case?” Tasha asked with a confused expression on her face. 

“It’s not the assignment per se but rather your new partner...Jason.” 

“Jason...what about him. You told me he has all the makings of a great agent, one of the best event analysts you’ve ever had in fact” Tasha said, still confused by Donovan’s apprehension. 

Donovan nodded softly “Aye, Aye. that I did. It’s just that in my experience I have found that oftentimes new agents are so anxious to prove their skills as analysts that they recklessly take action without thinking. And I...I worry that the same thing will happen with Jason. Something which could have dangerous consequences not only for him but for you as well” Donovan paused and then continued. “Since you’ve only been partnered with experienced agents in the past I thought I’d let you know the risks of partnering with a new agent. In case you felt like you couldn't handle it and wanted to be reassigned.” 

“I appreciate your concern Donovan but I can handle him. I haven’t spent this much time in the agency without learning a few things” Tasha replied as she attempted to reassure him. 

“And that is what makes you one of my very best agents,” Donovan said with a look of sincerity and pride in his eyes. 

“Thanks, Donovan. Hearing you say that means a lot to me...Well, I best get going. See you when I get back” Tasha said with a smile as she backed away from the desk, turned around, walked to the office door, and placed her hand on the doorknob. 

She had just opened the door and was about to exit the room when Donovan called out to her “Tasha.” 

She turned her head back in his direction, her hand still resting on the knob, and replied “Yes, Donovan.” 

“Please...Be careful.” 

“I will Donovan” she answered reassuringly before walking out of Donovan’s office, softly closing the door behind her. Donovan quietly sighed, walked around to the back of his desk, and sat once again in his office chair. 

“I just hope I’m doing the right thing,” he said to himself in a low worried tone of voice before resuming his work. 

[jolgan]

Something Wicked Comes to Stay

Intro/Summary

Prologue

Rating: T

Warnings: teenagers making out, demons, knives, identity crises (plural), existentialism, strong language at times, violence (teenagers attacking each other in a controlled environment, mentions of gang violence, oh yeah, demons), Teen Angst and other dumb teenage bs

Word Count: 1551

Chapter: 2/?

Chapter 1

The integration of Magic School was met with varying degrees of concern and outrage from students and their families. But, even so, the decision was already made, and demons were admitted. Even with extra safety precautions put in place by the Elders, many families pulled their children from the school. Instead, they chose to educate them themselves or to send them to public school. The Halliwell family wanted to do the same, but the oldest students refused. CeCe was the most adamant. She argued that because she attended Magic School for her entire education she would not fit in at a public school. She had never been in a classroom with non-magical students and she was uncomfortable with the idea. Besides, all her friends were at Magic School. Chloe and Adam Halliwell agreed with their cousin and stood with her. Their parents did eventually yield, but the agreement was conditional. The three oldest cousins would be allowed to continue at Magic School, but they had to demonstrate they could use “the power of three.” This was a ridiculous stipulation. It was impossible. They were not the Charmed Ones. They weren’t even siblings. The only hope they had was that each possessed one of Melinda Warren’s powers.

 Specific powers alone were not enough, the cousins soon found out. Over the summer they went through brutal training. They had to learn to fight together, what each of their strengths and weaknesses were and how their powers worked together. They did have a close relationship from being so close in age and growing up together, which helped, but it was still bitter work. Their parents conjured “replica” demons for them to fight. The difficulty of each battle increased. The pressure came to a head when one training exercise ended badly. While fighting a replica brute demon, Chloe was seriously injured. The trauma of seeing his cousin in that state awakened Adam’s healing abilities. He was able to save her without intervention, but that was the final straw for Wyatt, who believed they were pushing their children too hard to achieve something that was impossible. P.J. also had growing concerns with the intensity of the training they were forcing their teenage children through. “My daughter almost died tonight because of your “training” exercises. Your son is probably traumatized from seeing her like that,” She argued to Chris. “My child is my problem. Besides, it would have happened eventually. It’s probably better that it happened now than later,” Chris reasoned. “If this is too much for them, then so is going to a school with evil students,” he finished. Overhearing this exchange, CeCe and Chloe came up with a plan. They were going to prove to their parents that they could manage demons and use their own brand of “the power of three,” they just had to get Adam on board. The girls went up to CeCe’s room to find Adam lying on her bed, his arm over his eyes. “You okay?” Chloe asked him, as she and CeCe sat on the edge of the bed. Adam groaned and his arm slid back to his side. He looked at Chloe. “Are you okay?” he asked seriously. She nodded. “Of course I am. You healed me,” she assured him with a smile. The three teens sat in silence for a few moments before CeCe broke it. “We came up with a plan,” she said, waggling her eyebrows. Adam tensed for a moment and sighed. He never was a fan of their schemes. “What kind of plan?” he asked her reluctantly. “I’m glad you asked,” she giggled, almost evilly. The girls explained their idea to their wide-eyed younger cousin. He stared at them in disbelief. “Wait a minute, let me get this straight,” Adam said. “An hour ago, you almost died fighting a fake brute demon,” he said as he looked at Chloe. “And now, you freaks want to summon a real one to try and vanquish it. Do you have a death wish? Do you need to talk to someone?” he questioned. “Come on, Adam, you can heal now!” Chloe said proudly. “I can’t heal you if I’m dead! I can’t heal you if you’re dead!” he all but screamed. “Okay, okay. Keep it down. We don’t want the parents to hear,” CeCe shushed. “Listen, I am not going to public school next year. I am going back to Magic School even if it means I’m going alone. You don’t have to get involved if you don’t want to. I’ll just do it myself,” she said as she started to get up. Adam caught her wrist. “Wait,” he gave in. “You don’t have to manipulate me. I don’t want to go to a human school either. I’m in.” CeCe’s face brightened. “Yes! You are the best cousin ever!” she exclaimed as she and Chloe both attacked him with a hug. “Yeah, yeah. Get off me. You two owe me for this,” Adam said pointedly. “I’ll give you my notes from Wiccan History and write all your spells for you this year,” CeCe offered. “I’ll help you with potions and tell you if any of your crushes like you back,” Chloe promised. “Deal,” Adam grinned. “Okay, great. Call for the book.” CeCe told him. “What? What if your mom is using it and it just orbs out by itself?” he asked. CeCe rolled her eyes. “She’s out of town, the only other people here are our parents and they are currently arguing downstairs. Get the book,” she pressed. Adam sighed and held out his hands. “Book of Shadows,” he called. The book appeared in his hands with a swirl of white light. “Let’s get to work,” Chloe cheered. With that, their preparations began. They studied the Book of Shadows and found every scrap of information that was available on brute demons. Unfortunately, not much was available that they didn’t already know. They had to write both a summoning and a vanquishing spell, which was more difficult than they thought, especially since they couldn’t really practice them. They could only make sure that they were as specific and accurate as possible, and pray that they worked. The cousins were very thorough. They went over every detail and every possible thing that could go wrong and made back up plans to cover that. If the vanquishing spell didn’t work, they hoped that CeCe’s combustion power would be enough, but during their potions lesson with Grams the next day, they brewed a potion that replicated it just in case. “Hey, Grams?” Adam asked, flipping to the right page in the book. “Would it be possible if we could make this one today?” “Why?” Grams eyed him suspiciously. “I’ve always been jealous of you and CeCe. I want to know what it’s like to blow something up! Besides, you wrote the recipe for it right?” His words were dripping with feigned innocence and flattery. A slow smile spread across Grams’ face. “Yeah, okay,” she agreed, but the suspicion never left her eyes. She wasn’t born yesterday. Adam sent a covert wink to the girls when Grams was distracted. After they brewed and played with the potion, Chloe made sure to stash a few vials in CeCe’s desk drawer. The next part of the plan was to perfect using the crystal cage. This was purely to be sure that they could get the job done before they got attacked and things started going wrong. It would be humiliating if they needed their parents to bail them out. Adam and CeCe both orbed to the attic late at night so he could practice sliding the last crystal perfectly in place. When they felt confident enough, they put their plan into motion. One evening after training, they set up the crystal cage in the conservatory. Chloe called their parents into the room and joined Adam and CeCe, potions already in hand. When their parents arrived the three of them began summoning the brute. When he appeared, Adam slid the last crystal in place using his power. The brute began to fight to escape from his prison. The cousins joined hands and recited the spell they wrote together to vanquish him. The demon burst into flames signifying that their spell had worked. The cousins reacted excitedly, thrilled that they were successful. When they were done celebrating, they looked over to their parents, who were wearing varying expressions of shock and amazement. “Did our fifteen-year-old kids just…” P.J. stammered. “Mine is fourteen,” Chris stated. “Was that a brute?” “I didn’t think there were spells to summon or vanquish brutes,” Wyatt pondered out loud. The older Halliwells were impressed with their children’s performance, but that didn’t save the teens from a lecture about how recklessly they behaved. By the end, they admitted that the cousins had proved themselves and they would be allowed to stay enrolled in Magic School. CeCe, Chloe, and Adam were thrilled. Of the nine magical Halliwell children, three remained at the school and the younger six were pulled out and sent to public school. The oldest three cousins were excited to see what it would be like to go to school with demons. Excited, but also terrified. It was a thrilling mix of emotion. They couldn’t wait for school to be back in session.

**A/N** I wanted this to just be a nice little recap and then to get right into the story, but they had other ideas. I am but a vessel, so who am I to argue? The boys are coming next chapter I promise!

[dc41896]

Mission Complete

Pairing: Steve RogersxBlack Reader

⚠️: Mentions of death, slight angst, fluff

“Who knew such power could come from that small human?!,” Thor excitedly announced as you all walked in the Stark compound. “Wait you are only human right?”

“I mean that I know of. Still don’t know a lot about my dad since I never met him.”

Noticing your distressed mood once you entered, everybody silently concluded amongst themselves that you weren’t in the mood to talk. Everyone besides Thor that is.

Not that he was purposely trying to continuously bring it up, you knew he was just excited about your new amazing feat he, and pretty much everyone else on the team, had yet to see.

“I’m calling it now, you’re part alien to do something like that. And I say that in the best way,” he nervously laughs hoping he didn’t offend. “What if you’re a queen or something of your alien home?!”

“Ok, Thor I think Y/N’s heard enough about potentially being part alien,” Natasha responds hoping he would take the hint to leave the topic alone.

“Why am I the only one amazed by what just happened?”

“You mean how I just basically crushed a man to death by using a level of power I’m not supposed to?!,” you frustratedly retort, tears pooling in your eyes. “Trust me, I’m sure everyone else is amazed too.”

Rushing upstairs to your room before any tears could be seen escaping your eyes, all that can be heard by your teammates is the slamming of your door before silence overtakes the area.

“Dude you really gotta learn to read the room,” Rhodey says, shaking his head as he walks towards the lab to discuss new improvements with Tony.

———

Now in an old, oversized Duke sweatshirt and cotton shorts, you lie on your bed bundled under the grey comforter only able to think about the events prior. How you were left face to face with Luften after he managed to evade the others.

How his body instantly discolored and morphed into what looked like a sheet of paper smoothed out after being balled up repeatedly after your hit.

You would try to close your eyes and go to sleep but that would only make it worse and the images stay longer. Tears falling from your eyes onto the grey sheet beneath you, you hear two sets of footsteps approaching your door.

“Steve you’ve talked to plenty of people before, yet now you’re nervous about talking to Y/N? You’re gonna be fine, just use your Cap-ness, it works all the time,” Natasha explained.

“My what? And I’m not nervous I just don’t want to say the wrong thing is all. Plus she may not want to talk to me which is why I wanted you to come with me.”

“I’m sure she just wants someone to comfort her and listen to-,”

“You know, for a soldier and a spy you guys suck at whispering in front of doors,” you interrupt as you widely open your door, surprising them from being caught.

“Sorry Y/N,” Steve nervously scratches the back of his neck as he enters your room.

“Also sorry about Thor, sometimes he can’t catch a hint,” Natasha asks joining Steve to sit at the foot of your bed with you in between both of them.

“It’s ok, I know he didn’t mean anything by going on..and on.”

“Speaking of, do you want to talk about what happened?,” Steve asks, forearms resting on his knees as he turns to meet your tear stained cheek. “It’s ok if you don’t though, take all the time you need.”

With a sigh, you bring your knees to your chest resting your chin on them as you wrap your arms around your legs. “It’s just...when I went full force I know I was helping the team but at the same time I broke a promise I made a long time ago.”

Feeling fresh tears make their way to the surface you quickly duck your head down to hide your face. While these were your teammates whom you had grown to love, you’d be darned to let any of them see you cry. Or anyone for that matter.

“You promised to not use your powers fully?,” Nat asked with a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“That’s part of it, but I promised never to kill. One day when I was small, I was playing outside in the grass while my mom was inside doing something at the table. She heard me scream and came running outside to find me crying pointing down towards literal pieces of a snake. With my scream at that time I mutilated it and scared both of us. She knew if I could do that kind of damage at that age when I got older it’d only be stronger, so one day she sat me down and asked me to promise her I wouldn’t fully use my gift and I wouldn’t kill,” you explain wiping your face with the sleeve of your hoodie.

“I know it sounds stupid and she was just trying to look after kid me so I shouldn’t even care about that promise now, but still it’s just there making me feel guilty.”

Opening his mouth to speak, a dull buzz diverts his and your attention towards Nat as she looks down at her phone.

“I’m sorry it’s Clint, I gotta help him out with something. I promise to come back and check on you though ok?,” she apologetically smiles before exiting the room.

“Y/N there’s nothing strange about feeling guilty when breaking a promise. I would say most people do if there’s an ounce of good in them.”

“Yea but crying about it doesn’t make for a good hero does it?,” you counter, arms crossed in front of you as you look down at your feet now touching the floor.

“I wouldn’t say that. It shows how big of a heart you have and that you care about causing more good than harm,” he explains. “All great qualities for someone who’s trying to save the world.”

“Thanks,” you softly smile finally looking up to meet his eyes.

“From someone who’s experienced something similar, I can tell you those dilemmas won’t get easier to deal with when they come up, but trust yourself that you know what’s best. Even take tonight for example, you knew your promise, but also knew you had to do what you had to. I’m sure she would understand that.”

You knew he had a knack for taking charge and rallying everyone together before missions, but for whatever reason seeing this side of him was a little surprising. Not that you couldn’t tell he was compassionate, but you guessed you only looked at him as your leader in a way; the one in charge of giving you your orders.

Hearing his words just now made you feel as if he was a close friend, and had been for years.

“Yea you’re right, I’m sure she would. Especially with that coming with what I do now,” you softly laugh to yourself. “Thanks again Cap, and sorry about all the emotions and dramatics.”

“No don’t apologize. You might have powers, but you’re still a human with working emotions even if Thor is questioning it,” he lightly chuckles making you laugh. “And it’s okay to call me Steve.”

“Okay, Steve,” you smile. A comfortable silence falling over you, you both realize you might be gazing at each other for longer than usual before nervously looking down at your hands.

“I uh, guess I better get back downstairs. Who knows what Tony has going in the lab,” he responds after nervously clearing his throat. “Come get me if you need anything though okay?”

“Thanks will do,” you reply, watching as he walks towards the door with hands in his pockets. “Actually, um Steve?”

“Yea?”

“I was wondering if...-you know what? Never mind it’s nothing.”

“No I doubt it’s nothing, tell me.”

“Well I was wondering if you could just sit and talk with me for a while? You know to get everything off my mind for a bit, but if you have something you need to do then it’s okay-,”

“I can stay as long as you need me to, it’s no problem,” he smiles walking back to join you. “So Duke huh?”

“Yea it was my dad’s. He gave it to my mom on a date since she was cold and years later I found and kept it.”

“That’s similar to what happened on my first date, but I’m sure it didn’t go nearly as well as your parents’.”

“What happened?”

“Well let’s just say her needing my coat wasn’t because of the cold, but because me and the Tilt-a-Whirl didn’t mix,” he laughs as you giggle with a hand over your mouth imagining the sight.

———

Being startled by knocking on your door, you open your eyes to discover the comforter pulled over you and a note on the bedside table beside you.

Y/N, hope you woke up feeling better about yesterday. Sorry I couldn’t stay, I had to go on a quick mission with Banner and Thor, but I’ll see you when we get back to tell you what happened. P.S, Thor says he’s sorry about calling you an alien and promises he meant it in a good way ~Steve

You must’ve been more tired than you thought from not at all remembering going to sleep. The last image you could recall was both you and Steve sitting with your backs against the headboard as he told you more about his childhood and life in the army. Hearing another knock, you put away your letter before shouting “come in” to whoever was on the other side.

“Hey, how you feeling?,” Natasha asks closing the door behind her as she walks closer to you.

“Better, thanks,” you softly smile. “Steve really helped last night with everything he said.”

“Yep that’s Rogers for you, he’s always gonna be there to help however he can. And speaking of, he also wanted me to report back how you were doing and if you were coming to train. He understands if you’re not up for it though.”

You didn’t want it to happen, but hearing that he was wondering about you, on top of the letter, made your face slightly heat up as your heart swelled in your chest.

“Yea I’ll come down, just let me get dressed first. Plus I feel like messing with Thor’s head a bit from all the alien talk yesterday,” you reply as you walk to the bathroom making Nat laugh.

Taglist: @crushed-pink-petals @fumbling-fanfics @honeychicana @lady-olive-oil @melinda-january @themyscxiras @lovelymari4 @fullofmelaninsarcasmandepression @nunubug99 @felicity-x0 @ellixthea @jnk-812 @jojolu @brwn-sgr @captainsamwlsn @itshinothey @wildfirecracker @nina-sj @iammyownlover @chaneajoyyy

If anybody wants to be tagged, has asked to be tagged but don’t see your name, only wants to be tagged for certain people I write for, or no longer wish to be tagged just let me know🤓!

[yetanotherramblingfangirl]

hackle

I feel so foolish, I never noticed / You'd act so nervous / Could you be falling for me? / It took a rumor to make me wonder / Now I'm convinced I'm going under / Thinking 'bout you every day / Dreaming 'bout you every night / Hoping that you feel the same way - “Something To Talk About” by Bonnie Raitt

Karaoke was not and never would be Hecate's first choice for a night out.  Increasingly inebriated people attempting to sing pop songs they could barely muddle through when stone-cold sober?  This was not her idea of entertainment.  But it was Ada's birthday and if this is what she wanted to do, Hecate would tag along.

The usual suspects were already there when she arrived at the pub.  Algernon and Gwen were scouring the catalog for a suitable duet, Dimity was chatting up a curly-haired blonde at the bar, and Ada was chatting with her college friends who'd driven down especially for this party.  Hecate couldn't help but smile when she saw Ada laugh at something her friend Mona was saying.  Ada was beautiful when she laughed.

If she was willing to be honest with herself she would admit that Ada was always beautiful.  But that was a thought carefully boxed up and stowed away for contemplation later.

“Over here, Hecate!” Ada called when she noticed Hecate carefully making her way through the crowd.  She stood and made a quick waving motion.

Hecate smiled reflexively at the gesture and did her best to speed her approach.

“Happy birthday, Ada,” she said when she arrived at the table and took the empty seat next to Dimity’s coat.

“Thank you,” Ada said, smiling brightly.  “And thank you for coming.  I know this isn’t exactly your favorite activity.”

“It’s your birthday.  Of course I came.”

“But still-”

“What part of ‘it’s your birthday’ do I need to clarify?” She raised an eyebrow and smirked, hoping that everyone would understand that she was teasing.

Ada laughed before introducing her college friends.  “Hecate, you remember Mona and Barbara from my Christmas party, right?”

Hecate nodded politely to each of the other women.  “Of course.  Lovely to see you both again.  How was the trip?”

The next few minutes were occupied with small talk and refreshment of drinks.  Hecate did her best to ignore the drone of flubbed rock songs, focusing instead on the argument about the superiority of Mark Williams’s portrayal of Father Brown that Barbara had launched herself into.  She may not have been familiar with the show, not generally being much of a television watcher, but Barbara’s vehemence in the face of Mona’s counter-argument in favor of Kenneth Moore was certainly entertaining.

She was shaken out of this happy reverie when Dimity flopped down into the seat next to her.  “I think you’re almost up, Ada.”

“Oh.  Well then let me get one last drink before my name is called.  A bit of Dutch courage might not hurt.”  Ada pushed her chair in carefully before heading over to the bar.

“I’ll come with you,” Mona said, rising from her seat and following after Ada.  “I need a break from the ‘virtues of Mark Williams’.”

“Oh, come off it.  You just know I’m right!” Barbara called after the pair.  “I am right, by the way.  8 seasons bear that out.”

Hecate snorted in amusement before lapsing into only slightly uncomfortable silence.  She listened instead to Barbara quiz Dimity about the woman she’d been chatting with at the bar.  Her thoughts drifted aimlessly, focused only on making it through the evening without embarrassing herself by staring or saying the wrong thing in front of Ada’s friends.

Ada silently placed a glass of red wine in front of her, drawing a pleased smile from Hecate.  “I thought you might like something to drink,” she said softly before retaking her own seat.

“Thank you,” Hecate said, raising the glass and taking a sip.

If she thought Ada was looking at her a bit intently, she filed that thought away quickly and instead refocused on Dimity’s humorous retelling of her various flirtations.  Several more karaoke singers butchered their way through the oeuvre of Britney Spears and Kylie Minogue while Hecate sipped her wine and followed the gentle rise and fall of the conversation around her.  

Algernon and Gwen had rejoined the table and were offering commentary about the intonation and pitch problems.  She supposed it was an occupational hazard for Gwen.  Fifty years and counting as a music teacher was bound to leave one with opinions.

“Thank you, Melinda, for that rousing rendition of ‘Can’t Get You Out of My Head’!  Next up, we have Ada C.!” the man running the karaoke called into the microphone.

“Oh!  That’s me!” Ada said, standing quickly and making her way to the karaoke platform.

Hecate and the others cheered for her, whooping and chanting “Ada! Ada! Ada!” as she climbed up the three short steps to take the microphone from the barman.  Hecate offered a warm smile and an awkward thumbs up when she saw Ada glance her way.  She looked nervous yet determined.  Hecate couldn’t help but admire her for it.

She couldn’t claim to recognize the song, but she could recognize that Ada sounded much more confident than she looked.  Her voice was clear and she was delivering it.  Hecate couldn’t look away.  She was forced out of her observation by a pointed elbow in the side.

“Excuse me,” she hissed at Dimity, rubbing at the painful spot.  “What was that for?”

“I think she’s singing to you,” Dimity said.

“Don’t be ridiculous.  This is karaoke.”

Dimity rolled her eyes and looked pointedly at Hecate.  “I may be many things, some of which may occasionally flirt with ridiculousness, but I’m not blind or deaf.  She’s staring right at you when she sings.  Are you even listening to the words?”

“What?”

“Please tell me you heard the beginning of the second verse.  You were listening, right?”

“Explain.”

“You have to be kidding me.  ‘Thinking 'bout you every day...Dreaming 'bout you every night...

Hoping that you feel the same way’?  While staring directly at you?  I think Ada might be trying to tell you something.” Dimity crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back in her chair.

Hecate’s widened eyes focused on Ada who was in fact staring in her direction.  “Oh.”

Maybe karaoke wasn’t as bad as she remembered after all.

send me a ship/character and i’ll put my music on shuffle, pick a line, and write you 100+ words based on that.

[mech-bull]

The End (or Beginning?) of an Era (Farewell, AOS; Hello, Fanon)!

This season (the last few seasons, actually), I have been in odd living and work situations that have prevented me from watching the show live. This means I have needed to wait until episodes were available on streaming platforms - no judgment against anyone who obtains their entertainment in other ways, but I am paranoid about those things and so prefer to use “official” sources. ANYWAY, because of that time delay and my desire to remain as spoiler-free as possible, I have felt sadly removed from the fandom. It didn’t help that I have lost a bit of mojo for writing FS fic and have been distracted by shiny new things (not to mention real life) as well. Do not take this to mean that I love this show and characters and the friends I have made in this fandom any less. It and you have been incredibly important to me for years. I am very sad that it is over, very glad that it ended on such a creative high point, and very thrilled to see what the fandom will do now that the sandbox is all ours to play in. Get to it, guys. I might even someday finish the several WIPs collecting dust on my computer. 

For one last time...my random thoughts about the latest episode(s):

- Did I miss something? Why did Deke have to stay behind to press a button? None of the other people in that timeline had that level of scientific expertise?? And we didn’t even get a real goodbye between him and Nana&Bobo. The “who cares about Deke” jokes also stopped being funny around that part, thanks. 

- Speaking of Deke, his impression of Fitz had me ROLLING. I was WHEEZING at the hands on his hips, in particular. 

- The group therapy scene (which is what I’m calling it, OK) went on a little too long for my taste. i am glad they did a little “where are they now” thing but it just felt too stiff and fan service-y after a while. It also didn’t seem in character, even accounting for the amount of time and natural distance that had developed since they parted. (For example, Jemma calling May Melinda??)

- Again, did I miss something or did they save the day by giving the robots feelings? Weak. WEAK. I also stopped trying to make sense of the timeline/plan during the exposition flashbacks. These writers really need to learn how to tell a story, not just drag things out, stuff a whole bunch of vaguely plausible BS into one episode and MacGyver a solution.

- Super glad they brought Piper and Davis back. Even gladder they did NOT bring Ward back. Kind of upset they just offed Garrett like that, actually (seems to go against the whole “can choose to be a better person” mantra they tried to pull. On the other hand, I am sad we didn’t get to see him be a bigger villain instead of the YAWN-INDUCING Nathaniel). But I loved that it was Hand that got him right between the eyes. 

- Were Gamble (? I think that was the name) or the old guy at the bar supposed to be comics characters or previously mentioned/seen?

- Nice callback with the car. They took one of the cheesiest, cartooniest parts of the first season (and there were MANY) and turned it into a nice little touch. 

- It was a little saccharine and melodramatic, but how great was it that the power of FitzSimmons’ love and marital commitment saved the world? I knew they wouldn’t be able to do a lot with Iain, but I think they did the best they could. Also SCOTTAGE!!

And because I can’t NOT complain about this show:

- I am not surprised that Daisy’s happy ending involved a random family member and a forced, chemistry-deficient love interest, but I am resigned to it. Whatever. 

- I straight up REJECT the name Alya for the FS daughter. I HATE IT. For multiple reasons:

1. It is such a fanficcy thing to do to give a child a name that is cutesy and quirky and uncommon. Like the child is far too unique and important to have a “boring” name. 

2. It is DOUBLY a fanficcy thing to do to give a child a name that has some sort of ~special meaning to the parents that was literally almost entirely introduced in the same episode. (Side note: Don’t think I didn’t notice that the start of the story, i.e. Jemma’s scoliosis, was something that connected her to Will, not Fitz. I kind of loved and hated that at the same time.)

[Side note: I clearly have no problem with fanfic or fanficcy tropes/practices. I just prefer that shows leave that to the fanfic writers. We do it better.]

3. If you are the type of person to care about the meaning of names, per Wikipedia, Alya comes from the Arabic for “fat tail of a sheep.” So... (There are other meanings online, though. Still.)

4. Why turn excellent foreshadowing into a pointless red herring?? The name was RIGHT THERE. RIGHT THERE. Oh, hey, by the way, Diana is goddess of the moon, so there’s your something magnificent in space. In various versions again per Wikipedia, she also is goddess/protector of the hunt (trying to find friends, beat the Chronicoms), the countryside (Scottage), crossroads (moving on from SHIELD), childbirth (!), the underworld (how many times have people come back from the dead on this show??), a triple goddess (three become one). The Greek version Artemis is also more connected with a twin brother (a little tongue-in-cheek nod to all the “FitzSimmons are like brother and sister” statements) and was believed to both bring and heal disease (Jemma’s medical role, anyone?) Add onto that Deke’s reaction to the name, which still suggests to me that it was his mother’s name and therefore makes me concerned that he WON’T be born in their new timeline unless there’s a second child. Finally, are you going to tell me that Fitz DIDN’T give a biotech invention some punny name??

So, yes. I refuse. It’s just bad writing. Their child’s name is Diana.  

[seniorsweeney-blog]

Starting Out: First days are universally the hardest days...

Day 1: August 13, 2019

I arrived in Uganda around 2:30 PM. It was a long journey (12 hours from New York to Dubai and then another 6 hours from Dubai to Entebbe), but we made it safely. Along the way, I watched movies, journaled, and began to read Melinda Gate’s book, The Moment of Lift.

I was greeted at the airport by Ruth, my host, and her cousin George, who I met on my last trip. After about 20 hours of traveling, I felt extremely comforted by a familiar face. We hopped in the car and made our way back to Kampala.

When we made it to Ruth’s house, it felt entirely different than last time. Everything might have looked the same or similar to what it was a year ago. However, during my last trip, I always had Ysabel, a fellow student, by my side experiencing everything. We had been chosen to work the internship together, live together, and be support sources for each other.

This time, I am on own, and being back in Ruth’s house without Ysabel made me confront that reality. Not only am I on my own, but I am also doing a completely independent project. There is no office space for me to go, no strict 9-5 schedule, and no manager assigning my tasks. I am in charge of finding a space to work, creating structure for myself, and finding people to interview.

I tried to fall asleep around 8:00 PM, but I could not help but feel a little overwhelmed by this reality. “What was I doing here?”, I thought. Doubts, worries, and stressors circled my mind and kept me up. This is often what happens to me when I have to deal with uncertainty. My mind thinks of all the things that could go wrong rather than the plan to make it go right. However, I decided to shut that shit down and play a guided meditation for sleep. Sometimes, when confronted with anxiety, this is the best way for me to get through it. The guided meditation urges you to “give your thoughts permission to leave you to take their own journeys for a while and join you again in the morning”. While this seems like the obvious thing to do after a long journey with limited sleep, sometimes it is helpful to have a reminder to tackle your problems when you are well rested.

I woke up again around 1:00 AM and luckily Maddy, a good friend, was around to call and chat. She heard me out, made me feel comforted, and reminded me that I am up for task.  Feeling more secure, I fell back asleep and let my mind and body prepare for the next day ahead.

Day 2: August 15th, 2019

Given my anxieties the night before, I really hit the ground running on my second day. I got up and called a friend around 8:00 AM, I ate a breakfast consisting of mango, pineapple, and a fried egg, and then I took a boda to Acacia Mall to get started.

I first tackled the problem of getting an office space. I visited a local coworking space called Tribe Kampala, where many researchers and internationals come to enjoy fast internet and a productive environment. I opened a membership, set up my WiFi, and sat down to work.

Next, I started to make a real tangible action plan. For my senior thesis, I am investigating the roles and experiences of teachers, administrators, policy makers, and nonprofits in integrating the refugee population into the national education through the Education Response Plan (ERP). I intend to start with the schools because they are hardest to reach from abroad and Ruth, my host mom, offered to drive me to these schools because she does not have much going on during the weeks.

While I had prepared a list of schools that I was interested in visiting before coming, I realized that I had to narrow down my target sample to schools that serve refugees. I had read in numerous reports that mentioned 23 schools with the highest refugee populations, but I was having trouble tracking their names.

I first attempted to narrow the sample down by identifying the subdistricts in Kampala with the highest refugee populations and creating a list of schools within those areas. Then, after four hours of work, by the grace of God, I found a list of schools in Kampala and their refugee count in their student population deep in the bottom of a UNHCR update from 2016. While collecting accurate information of the refugee status of students can be difficult because many children choose not to disclose this information, this was a start. With this list, I began mapping out the schools, tracking down their phone numbers, and creating a plan to visit them starting next week.

After working for quite some time, I headed over to Acacia Mall to buy a phone plan. Unfortunately, I forgot that I needed my passport to register so I had to put this task off for the next day. Instead of doing that task, I went to a café, had a passion juice, and practiced on my mental math to prepare for some case interviews that are looming in the fall.

Around dinner time, I met up with Ryan, a recent Princeton graduate currently doing a Princeton in Africa Fellowship which sets you up to work for NGO or Social Enterprise in Africa for a Year. He is working for Rockies, an organization that scouts a talent from across rural Uganda, recruits them for a performance troop, and pays for their training and schooling. He just moved here in the beginning of August and is already being thrown into work from grant writing to logistics.

We went to Meza, my favorite shawarma place in the world, and chatted about our experiences, our transition, and our lives. Then, we went to Wine Garage, a nearby lowkey wine bar, for their happy hour to celebrate meeting each other and my first full day in Kampala.

I ended the day feeling more confident and positive then before. I realized I wasn’t alone and that I had many contacts and many people I could reach out to. I also realized that I can make a plan and execute on it- it’s as simple as just doing it. I had plan to contact schools the next day and reach out more people.

This time when I got home, I worked a bit more, excitedly showed Ruth the schools, and called my parents and friends to tell them the updates. Things were looking up!

Day 3: August 15th, 2019

Today, was a longer day. I woke up a bit later around 9 AM because I was up until late working on logistics for when I get back to school and start working with the Glee Club. I quickly showered, ate breakfast, and ran out the door.

I made it to Acacia Mall around 10 AM and went to the MTN Mobile Provider Office to set up my local number (finally!) Pro Tip: Always do it at the airport- it might be more expensive, but it’s easier. It took about an hour to get all set up and squared away with a phone number, but I practiced on my mental math app in the meantime. While I wanted to have been watching Stranger Things, the last thing I need right now is more mysteriousness to creep into my subconsciousness.  So, instead of watching those pre-downloaded Netflix episodes, mental math it was.

After, I finished setting up my phone. I went to Tribe Kampala and began to make phone calls. The first 10 schools I called either did not pick up or were invalid numbers. Finally, 11 calls later, an administrator told me that I must go through the Kampala Capital City Authority (KCCA) to interview students (yay bureaucracy!!).

With this new development, I called the KCCA to figure out the process to get their approval and introduction to schools. I found out I needed to provide a letter of introduction from my University providing the details of my work. So, for the next hour, I printed and assembled a packet to bring to the KCCA. I then took a safe boda to the KCCA, walked into their massive complex, and was directed to the department of education for approval. I handed her the packet, explained my time crunch (only 3.5 weeks), and she told me that I can expect to hear back from tomorrow with her feedback (Please say a prayer for this to work out). Despite this bureaucratic bump in the road, I am positive that it will all work out and that I am taking the steps in the right direction.

After this, I had a call with an associate at a consulting firm to learn about her experience and gather her advice. I also read a chapter in my Casebook and practiced more mental math (shout out to my sister if she’s reading this).

For dinner, I met up with Rosette, a former coworker of mine from the Bayimba Cultural Foundation, where I worked last summer. She has since left the organization and is on her way to the next thing in life. Here is a bit about her life because I think she is a power house and we all can learn from the way she walks purposefully through life and always demonstrates her value:

           She is the daughter of a diplomat, who recently passed away, and majored in tourism in her undergraduate education. She had always been interested in theater and drama starting with her work at her local parish where she led the Christmas Cantatas and taught Sunday School through drama. While working at Sunday School, a leader in the church took notice and offered her a job as her project manager. She worked there for a while, but after being dissatisfied with inconsistent pay, she looked to move on. 

It was around then when she made a close connection with the woman who would always write the Christmas Cantatas. She impressed the woman by tidying up her place and offered Rosette an administrator job. While she was happy at this job, she both lived and worked with this woman which made for difficult boundaries. It was around that time when she started going to the Bayimba Festival and connecting with their founder, Faisal. She became their part-time workshop coordinator as she continued working for the other woman often working early mornings, late nights, and traveling on the weekends for the Bayimba events across the country. After doing this for a period of a year, she realized that she had to get out and move on her own. Around that time, she met three international women hoping to rent out their place while they would be away. Despite not having the money at the time, she demonstrated her interested and moved forward with the opportunity. 

After working hard at Bayimba, the team there began to take notice and offered her a full-time position when the funding came in. She then was able to move out of the old job and house and start this new career with Bayimba. For the past 9 years, that had been her life. She worked as the coordinator for the Bayimba Academy- organizing workshops, inviting guest artists from around the world, and helping develop the young talent here in Uganda. 

Just this May, she resigned from Bayimba and began to take the steps towards her next phase in life. She is hoping to improve her education and eventually work to improve the channels for cultural exchange across the world and open people’s minds up to the broad arts landscape that is out there. She is brilliant, strategic, and has had so much faith and courage over her life. I am excited for her next adventure.

           Rosette and I talked for hours and she connected me with some music educators that serve refugee populations across Uganda who I will try to interview. She is one of those amazing individuals that leave you speechless at times.

           Now, I am in my room in bed at Ruth’s house next to the Oryx Petrol Station on Bukoto-Kisassi Road. I am exhausted, but so excited and ready for what will come tomorrow.  

[okimargarvez]

SHE IS PERFECT FOR HIM

Original title: Lei è perfetta per lui.

Prompt: Spencer and Lila are getting married; handbook for shippers.

Warning: mention of various kind of TV-series.

Genre: comedy, humor, romantic, friendship.

Characters: Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez, O.C.

Pairing: Garvez.

Note: oneshot 33 in Garvez collection.

Legend: 💏😘🎈.

Song mentioned: L’amore e basta, Tiziano Ferro.

GARVEZ STORIES

I mentioned many of my ships from various series: jelinda (Jim Clancy and Melinda Gordon, Ghost whisperer) ; Elliot and JD (Scrubs) ; Ted Mosby and Robin Scherbatsky (How I met your mother); Tate (Caitlin Todd and Anthony Dinozzo, NCIS) ; Jack and Amanda (Diagnosis Murderer) ; Danny Messer and Lindsay Monroe (CSI New York) ; Semir Gerkhan and Andrea Gerkhan (Alarm für Cobra 11 – Die Autobahnpolizei).

This story is dedicated to @thinitta cause it's just one way to say something I think I don't say to her yet: I love you, we are like a sisters even if we live so far... And I love our crazy conversations XD

SHE IS PERFECT FOR HIM

Luke Alvez didn’t know he was so sentimental before he saw Penelope, sitting in the church next to him, crying during a colleague's wedding. Yet, a song doesn’t stop turning in the head, even after, during the reception, especially when, with great joy, he ends up again next to the blonde IT, sitting right in front of him.

I change, perhaps, always nice, no, nice for me, that I see you always nice that I feel like dying. Even if you close the doors in front of me, sometimes, even if I’m alone and far away, sometimes, and when I am in the hotel, I’m less mine and more of the fate, and write it in a terrible letter, but if you carry a cross, don’t keep it in silence in the soul, love, shout it out loud!

He has eyes just for her, the whole table realizes it. He already feels lucky like that, a whole day without unsub to chase, so long time to admire her. But she, as always, ignores him, talks to JJ about the marriage of the latter and a missed one, hers. And while he feels jealousy rise, towards a stranger who has had the ardor of asking Penelope's hand, something falls on his shoulder. He raises his head and understands instantly.

-Well, they say: wet bride is a lucky bride!- someone exclaims, while some women scream, complaining about the hairstyle cost hours and money. Luke has always loved the rain and today his level of worship goes up considerably. The hotel where the reception is held obviously had foreseen this eventuality, in fact the tables are ready inside, in a decidedly less suggestive, but dry environment. Even these with the seats assigned and not exchangeable. He and Penelope, jubilation, end up with a group of strangers, or rather unknown. The bride's friends and bridesmaids.

-Excuse me.- Penelope draws the attention of a waiter. -There must be a mistake. We... I should be with the groom's friends.- the young man looks displeased.

-I'm desolate, miss, but these are the procedures. Take this opportunity to make new friends.- and he goes away. He never thought that Garcia had these problems, indeed, the opposite, but today she seems so lost in her thoughts. In the end she surrenders, sits down next to him and sighs.

-Well, it seems that fate wants to keep us close.- Luke says, not very loud, pouring himself a drink. Then he asks her if she wants the same, and she shrugs, holding out her glass. Their fingers touch each other.

-Yeah, Newbie, I bet you did it raining, on purpose.- he chuckles, glad that she wants to play in this way. It is definitely a beautiful day.

-Yes, uh, it happens that I have a friend in the meteorological institute...- it's not even a complete lie. He approaches slightly, winking at her and the blonde can’t help but smile, shaking her head.

-Hey, it looks like you've impressed someone.- she whispers softly, causing shivers down his back with her hot breath. They look at each other, he with a confused expression. -Do you see that beautiful brunette, on the other side of the table? Since we've arrived, she's just staring you.- Luke raises his head to check and she stops him. -Stupid, she could see you!- their mouths are only a few centimeters apart and for a moment he loses control. Then Penelope lets him go and returns to a normal position.

-Too bad that I prefer blondes.- he comments shamelessly flirtatious.

-Ha ha, very funny. Instead you look exactly the kind of man who likes brunette, Latin, slender, tiny, in short...- she gets stuck, because she ended up on rough terrain. He laughs openly.

-Brunette, Latin...? That is a feminine version of me. So boring.- the waiters pass to collect the dishes with the leftovers of the appetizer. It will be a long day. -No, I repeat, I’m attracted more to blondes. Light hair, fair skin...- he passes the tongue on the lips. -Better yet, if she wears glasses.- he dared too much and in response receives a weak fist on the arm.

-The more time passes and the more you become stupid, Alvez.- but at the same time Penelope keeps an eye on the brunette who keeps looking at them.

-It's the effect you're doing to me.- she seems to be back in time and there's Morgan beside her, not Luke. She misses to flirting with a man, but she doesn’t flirt with him, never, it's too... dangerous. She looks up at the sky. Without stopping to stare her, the man tries to grab the glass, but he clashes right with... that brunette. Penelope doubts that she took the opportunity to find an excuse to start talking. -Oh, sorry .- Luke is forced to turn around.

-Don’t worry, it was my fault, I'm so clumsy...- yes, she's definitely right, the woman did it on purpose. Penelope finds herself annoyed, but believes it is due to her feminine pride. She would never falling in down to impress a man. Luke smiles politely at the chick. -You're a federal, are not you? I think I saw you on TV.- he nods, shrugging his shoulders modestly.

-I could say the same thing. I'm Luke, nice to meet you. And she is Penelope, the best computer technician in the world.- uh, definitely exaggerated. The blonde is stunned by this presentation, especially because the last time he had said to her a compliment like that, it was a mockery. She merely smiles and shakes her hand.

-But sure, you both work for the unit of behavioral analysis with Spencer!- apparently they are more famous than they thought. -And... if I can ask, sorry but I work for a tabloid newspaper... professional deformation... how long have you been together, you two? There would be perfect to write an article on the changes in recent years within the federal regulation against fraternization at work.- Penelope, who was drinking, almost chokes, while a smile on the face of Luke is painted. However, she talks first.

-No, we're not engaged, we're just colleagues. Just colleagues.- any psychologist could tell him that repetition is certainly a sign of nervousness, present when trying to tell a lie. And Garcia has never been good at lying, as far as he knows. In addition, she seems decidedly blushing.

-Ah, weird. I could have sworn that...- even the brunette who, according to Penelope was interested in him, remains confused. Before she can restrain him, Luke decides to say his own.

-Well, it's actually she who thinks so, but I'm not satisfied to be just his "colleague".- he says the last word in a strange way. -And I don’t give up. She's about to go down, I feel it.- the blonde's protest is slowed by the arrival of the first plate. Spencer have been very attentive and warned all staff that she was a vegetarian. What she doesn’t understand is why the waiter served the same dish also to Alvez. He understands where her gaze fell. -I didn’t want you to feel alone...- he whispers softly, and the tone seems very serious. Penelope swallows and chooses to ignore it.

-Wow, guys, you'd be perfect for a TV series. There is so much feeling between you two. One shot and we would already have a million shippers, I'm sure.- the IT decides to change the subject.

-Do you know who is the best ship ever? Melinda and Jim. Ghost whisperer. Fabulous. They have shown that there is no need for the typical tension of the "before they get together" phase to drive fans all over the world crazy. When he dies, he refuses to leave her and enters that body and forgets her, but he is still pushed towards her... and then when he finally remembers... I have consumed a box of tissues, and if I accidentally turn on the TV and there is that scene, it's the same thing, always.- Penelope talks in one of her passionate monologues. He loves to listen to her, because every time he discovers something new that concerns her. In this case, the thought of her that looks at such shows and is moved doesn’t surprise him. He had imagined it exactly like that.

-You are right, it's one of the best ships that exist. Then Jennifer Love Hewitt is a great actress, very beautiful, without falling into the vulgar, intense... however, I'm so stupid, I realized I hadn’t introduce myself yet. I'm Clara, one of the bride's bridesmaids.- Penelope has definitely changed her mind about the brunette and now they're both immersed in sharing ships, one of the quickest methods in the current millennium to make friends instantly. If you share my ship, then I could even fall in love with you.

-And in your opinion? What is the couple that made you suffer more and that was successful?- Luke has been transformed from an object of desire to an uncomfortable third wheel, and is not sure that it displeases him.

-Elliot and JD, definitely.- seeing the confused expression of Penelope, she opens her mouth. -Don’t tell me you never watching Scrubs!- the other hurries to deny. -Oh, you scared me. It was a continuous back and forth, but even when they were separated... it was as if they were together anyway. And in the end, they got married. Better than that, it could not have ended.- both women utter dreamy sighs. -Now it's your turn.- of them three, Luke is the only one who is eating.

-Ok, I'm a bit ashamed, but... Ted and Robin.- no need to specify which series it is, he even understood it. -I think that producers and screenwriters have found a good idea, that of a father who tells his children how he met their mother and ends up putting in everything about the period of his youth... I do it for anything, talk nonsense, I mean, as at this moment.- they laugh in an accomplice way. -But in the meantime they needed something to move it all, and although the ship between Lily and Marshall is great...- spoiler alarm. -...it is still the canonical ship and it needed a more... messed up. But they have definitely exaggerated, creating the story of Ted and Robin. The French horn was the pinnacle, but there is so much to tell you...- Clara nods, but doesn’t seem entirely agree.

-I have a confession to make, that I fear will break your heart.- even if she is a journalist, it could very well be an actress like Lila. She takes Penelope's hand in hers. -I went on the dark side...- the blonde opens her eyes and nods her head. -Yes, I'm sorry... but I prefer Robin and Barney.- it can be true friendship only if you are able to overcome the diversity of opinions on one of your favorite couples. Penelope nods, not letting go.

-Yes, well, I find them nice too. It is difficult to choose, I think the producers have just done a bullshit, with this double possibility. But after all, their goal is only to have ratings, that people look at it so as to continue to obtain financing.- the sad reality behind every alleged work of art. Sad and resigned sighs.

-But let's move on to really important things. Do you love more the couples who are already canon, engaged, married, like Jim and Melinda, or those of which we see the slow development?- oh yes, it is these, the fundamental things of life. But he is curious to discover Penelope's answer.

The woman seems to think about it. -It's a difficult question, I love both possibilities. Perhaps, but... more the second. I believe that, even in real life, the phase in which everything is in the balance, in short, it is clear that two people are going in one direction but there is still uncertainty, every moment is full of possibilities... is the best. Like the moments before the first kiss...- Luke manages to attract his attention brushing her arm. -What's there?- for a thousandth of a second they look into each other's eyes and only they exist, as pure spirit.

-Nothing, I wanted to know if the ladies liked to drink.- he also winks at Clara, who is quick to hand over her glass. Penelope nods her head. But is it just a casual gesture, or should he read more behind it?

-Anyway I agree, those are among the best moments, even if I always find myself shouting at the television as it is possible that someone is so naive as to not understand when the person he is in love with, feels the same.- the blonde doesn’t notices it, but Clara launches a decidedly explicit look at Luke, and certainly not to flirting with him. The man tightens his lips and raises his eyebrows, as if to say that he no longer knows what to do. -And how kind of dynamic? Friends or enemies? Or, let's not forget, there is also the "first in bed and then exchange of names" version. Usually these are the couples that last longer.- she laughs, while Penelope blushes.

-Uh, I'm a bit bad, but I love when the man is clearly the more taken and she, although not fully aware of it, for some reason decides to keep him at a distance and treat him a bit bad... I don’t know, I think it is guilt of my feminism.- Luke chokes with a mouthful and is forced to drink again. He swaps another look with Clara.

-Give me an example.. it is now clear that the journalist has decided to give him a hand, even if she doesn’t know why. Perhaps she got slightly carried way by this story of the ship.

-Well, Kate and Tony. Although there the situation was fairly balanced, but between the two, in the end, he was the more taken. When Kate died, I stopped looking at NCSI.- a thoughtful pause. -Jack and Amanda. Diagnosis Murder. It's an old series, but, hell, I rewatched an episode by mistake last week and... I realized I was shipping them even more than in the past. Unfortunately, between them there was been only a kiss...- Penelope hasn’t quite understood that she is ending in a trap. As the protagonist of any self-respecting fanfiction, she is naive and unaware.

-Yes, I remember, when Jack saves her life, one of many times.- the blonde nods with emphasis. -But don’t you think that their relational dynamics could be described as that between brother and sister? I don’t know about you, but I grew up with two older brothers and they treated me that way, but they weren’t in love with me, I assure you.- Clara has launched the supreme challenge. She has to demonstrate that her ship contains the motivations to become canon.

And the IT certainly doesn’t hold back. She positions herself better on the chair, waits for the waiters to pass with the second plate, and starts to talking, as a lawyer who exposes his plea in court. -I have three brothers, no, it's not their case. These are imperceptible things, because after all it is not a comedy, but an old-fashioned crime, so relationships develop in the margins, as a boundary and are often used to create hilarious situations. But if we go to see the nuances well, Jack is clearly jealous of Amanda, like in that episode with the doctor who finally flirt with her friend in front of her and it turns out that he was also the killer...- Clara nods, looks a second to Luke, almost winks and then returns to focus on Penelope.

-Yes, that Jack is interested in Amanda is also clear to me. But to be together, they must both be involved. And you say that from the way she behaves with him, that is, because she treats him badly, it's clear that Amanda also feels something for him. I say wrong?- well, Phil will not be offended to share the rule of his best man with Clara. If this is successful, it is the least he can do to thank her.

Luke turns directly to look at her, but Penelope doesn’t notice, so taken by the defense of her ship. -No, that's right. Because... after all, to treat badly, to keep at a distance, they are all defense techniques. The same thing happens between Danny and Linsday. At the beginning they can’t stand each other, they have to argue on any occasion, they prick each other and then... they even end up having two children. I think it's the crime couple with the most consistent dynamic, as Andrea and Semir of Cobra 11 Special Team for the action series.- Clara nods, then, after a few seconds, she stands up.

-Sorry, I... I'm going to the toilet for a moment.- she winks at Luke, who returns her.

Penelope turns to him. -Well, I was right. It seems that something is being born on this table. You'll have to thank your meteorologist friend...- the man smiles, but then realizes that she has clearly misunderstood.

-What are you saying?- meanwhile the time continues to flow, inexorable.

-You and Clara! Hey, I saw that you looked at each other all the time. When she comes back, I'll go to the bathroom, so that you can...- he silences her with three moves at the same time. Leaning forward, bring his face close to that of the woman; he puts a finger on her lips; with his other hand he grabs her arm.

-But what…? No, Garcia, you didn’t understand anything. I don’t care Clara, I told you, she's not my type. You see too many TV series and you can’t help shipping, even in the real world.- it sounds a bit too much as a reproach. She looks at the amber fingers around her arm. -Really, don’t you get it, Penelope? Even Clara noticed it, that’s the reason why we looked at each other while you are talking about couples and relationship dynamics and those things. Why can’t you apply the same parameters to yourself?- he lets her go and she starts breathing again. She can’t think, is confused.

-To myself?- she asks, with a little voice as a child.

-Yes, to yourself. Why the way Amanda treats Jack should be symptomatic of her interest, and the same behavior, yours with me, is not it?- again, she's out of breath, swallows, turns her head. Her body implements every possible defense to prevent that thought from making its way into her mind. -Why did you keep me at a distance before you even met me? And you call me Newbie?- too many questions, she feels like she's being accused, on the stand.

-I... you know. I told you, you took Morgan place, who was my best friend. I promised myself that I would hate anyone who replaced Derek, so it has nothing to do with you. You're not special.- she at least manages to convince herself.

-No, it's not just this. You were jealous of Roxy, when you thought she was my girlfriend. And you can’t hate people, Penelope.- damned all the profilers of the universe. -Do you say that you really don’t feel anything for me? That you don’t even like me a little?- he looks straight into her eyes, as he asks her, he doesn’t even know with what courage. Despair, of course. Clara will be take time on purpose to give them time to conclude.

-Uh, Luke...- signs of surrender: she has used his name; dilated pupils. -No, you're not my type. Surely many women think differently, that you're an attractive man, and there's nothing strange, because it's true.- she got messed up by herself. This time nobody will come to the rescue. -I mean, it's an objective fact, like... like... something that I can’t remember of right now.- she blushes to the tips of the ears and he swears that she's also sweating. -But the physical aspect is not enough, you know?- why she persists to treat him as if he were a superficial playboy?

-I know.- he blames the blow well, after all. -I told you, in fact, that as well as blonde, with clear skin, glasses, the girl I like also has a huge heart, is sweet, playful, and an absolute genius?- maybe white wine that Luke is sipping it was been altered by some substance or he doesn’t hold alcohol at all. It is the only explanation.

-Listen, Luke, I also love flirting and play this game, but sometimes less is more.- she makes clear, while in the distance sees Clara come.

-But it was never a game for me.- he tries to take her hand and sees her wavering.

-No?- before he can answer, the brunette sits, apologizing with her eyes.

-I couldn’t really miss the dessert.-

And... and I’m the only one who knows every answer, and I will not change with the passing time, and while I lose myself thinking about just love... and you remember that this is what I’m, and I challenge life always with my head down, because I care about just love... and I’m the only one who knows every memory, and for me you're not the first thing to come along, because for me you're just love... and I’m the only one who know my mistakes, even if there is still a trace left, in front of everyone for you I’m just your love...

 The wedding is over, the couple have flown off for their honeymoon and everyone is slowly moving towards their respective destinations. Penelope doesn’t understand why Luke is still following her. -Hey, Newbie, the party is over, you can stop playing the part of the seducer, now.- if he was another type of man, would take her by the wrist and making her a turn that would catapult her in his arms. But, unfortunately, he is part of those who struggle to expose themselves with gestures of that kind, the opposite of macho.

-Play the part? Do you seriously think that I am like that? No, but you would like it. It would make things easier. But no. I'm the opposite of a seducer, and I'm not ashamed to tell you. I always thought it was better to be alone, don’t bind me, especially while I was at war. I'm not good with women, I don’t go to a romantic date since high school. I'm a complete landslide.- his words had the strength to stop her and force her to turn around. Luke performs in a sad smile.

-Why are you telling me all these things, Luke? Do you want to pity me? Do you need someone to vent your masculine instincts?- damn it, this woman would put a strain on anyone. -Because, I'm sorry, it's a tempting offer, I don’t deny, but...- he reaches her, shaking his head and sighing.

-Fuck, Garcia, do you think I just want to fuck with someone? Getting that would definitely be easier than a hug from you. We've known each other for two years, and the only kind words you've addressed to me have actually been directed to my dog. You don’t want to give me even a miserable chance.- she has never seen him so much altered, not with her, over all. Penelope trembles, but the fear of getting hurt is stronger than everything else.

-Chance for what, make me believe you're crazy in love with me and then make fun of me? You're not the only one who's been dry for quite a while. I'm better alone.- finally the truth. -It's just because I treated you badly, if you're so attached to me, don’t you realize? If only I...- Luke shakes his head and slowly lays his hands on her shoulders, then down the arms.

-No, it's not just for the chase, it's that I'm fine when I'm with you. I can’t hold back the smiles. And I feel like one of the protagonists of your TV series. And if you want to know, we already have a fan club. And a ship name.- Penelope opens her eyes and mouth. -All the team, but not only.- he answers to her mute questions. -People from O'Keef, Phil, even your Morgan. And Clara.- she doesn’t reply anything. -Garvez, the name is Garvez. Garcia and Alvez. It's not bad, what do you think? It’s by JJ.- of whom others, she had been the founding partner of the ship.

To get out of the quagmire, Penelope finds herself saying the first bullshit that goes through her head. -Lila is perfect for Spencer, because she will never ask him to stop loving Maeve.- Luke is so surprised to let her go. The mouth bent in his typical crooked grimace.

-You are right, she is perfect for him because she can understand and make him happy, even if they are completely different or maybe because of this. But what does it really mean what you said? That your first love is dead, or that you will never look at me in the way you look at Morgan?- the woman understands that he has no intention of surrendering. She sighs, bites her lips and returns to look at him.

-Of course, I'll never look at you as Morgan, you're not him. You're another person.- a calm, resigned tone. In the air around them it is possible to see the formation of the written canon in the sky, in cloud’s shape.

-And this is good or bad, for you?- it can’t just be a fixation, it can’t be just for the thrill of hunting, it can’t be just to take her to bed, it can’t be a sophisticated revenge. Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

-I don't know.- she shrugs and he takes her face in his hands. -I can’t risk, do you understand? Because it was so damn taken for granted that I would have a crush on the new one, everyone was expecting it and I hate the obvious things, I hate them to death...- maybe when the man's soft lips press on hers, she changes her mind. A delicate kiss, trembling, at the same time intense. And in those few minutes a real process takes place in Penelope's mind. The defense attorney is herself, the only one to say no, she's not feeling anything because Luke is indifferent to her. Luke is the lawyer, that is the banality. The witnesses at the stand are all their friends and even some strangers. The jury is the heart of Penelope and the judge, who issues the sentence, the one who has the last word... is her head.

The blonde suddenly pulls off and looks at him. Luke thinks he messed things up, but it would still be worth it. Both the mind and the heart are repeating the same thing: you are perfect for him and he is perfect for you. Nothing else matters.

The bang of the gavel. The verdict is: guilty.

TAGS: @theshamelessmanatee  @arses21434 @kathy5654 @martinab26 @reidskitty13 @jenf42 @gracieeelizabeth27 @silviajajaja @smalliemichelle99 @charchampagne14 @thinitta   @myhollyhanna23 @garvezz @mercedes-maldonado  @shyladystudentfan @cosmicmelaninflower

[suallenparker]

Philinda Fanfic: In Control, Chapter 14

RATING: Explicit as in lots of detailed sexual practices between two consenting adults.

SPOILER: ALL the backstory we saw on the show up until Melinda met Andrew. - Because this is set before she met him. ;)

SUMMARY: After Melinda expresses an interest into the BDSM scene, Phil offers to scratch that itch for her. So they meet at a hotel to explore her fantasies …

NOTES: See Chapter 1. Thank you to everybody who kicked my ass to write! You’re all awesome! I hope you enjoy this. :) You can also read this  on AO3

PREVIOUS | NEXT

o0o

Chapter 14: In which they discuss roleplay

She bought yet another dress. This one was a black wrap dress. The v-neck made her boobs look amazing, even without a bra and the flowy skirt allowed for easy movement.

And it cost about 200 bucks.

It was fine.

She took off her coat when she stepped out of the elevator and walked towards her destination.

She had the money and what if she spend it just to look good for a man? It was fine.

And she just wanted to look good to turn him on so they could have hot sex. It was very selfish, really.

They hadn't seen each other for two weeks. At all. Not even at work.

And she missed him. - Well, the sex. The magic dick. She had missed that.

So was it a bit ridiculous to try and look as good as possible?

No!

It was not.

It was fine.

Besides since she had skipped underwear for tonight, she had saved on money there. Or something.

Whatever!

She opened the door to yet another hotel room to find Coulson sitting on yet another leather chair in the corner of the room. Somehow all hotel rooms looked the same. - Well, not completely alike, but very similar. So far they all had a big bed in the middle of the room, two chairs and a table in a corner, sometimes a desk. This one had a desk.

Coulson's eyes lit up and he almost jumped out of the chair as soon as he saw her.

This was definitely worth 200 bucks.

Her heart skipped a beat.

He looked at her like she was a princess.

But he didn't look so bad either. The dark blue suit was tailored nicely and the grey tie made her want to grab it and pull him in for a kiss.

Smiling, she dropped the go bag and her coat on the floor next to the door and walked up to him.

She really wanted to kiss him right now.

He hid his hands behind his back as he walked towards her and smiled too. “Hi,” he said. Such a dork.

“Hi.”

“Drink?”

She noticed the opened bottle of red wine and two glasses on the table. “Please.”

Without touching each other, they sat across from each other. He poured her a glass of wine and she could just see on his face that the next time he'd open his mouth, he'd say something stupid, like comment on the weather. He was a good guy, but he tended to ramble when he was nervous. And the dress definitely made him nervous.

A very good investment.

But better, she'd save them from whatever dorky thing he'd say.

“Could we try roleplay?” she asked.

He sat the bottle down a little harder than necessary, cleared his throat and handed her the glass. “Sure, what kind?”

Yes, better.  Flustering him was always fun. This would be fun! She sipped on the wine. “You're the pro,” she said and grinned. “How about some options?”

He took a breath and sat down. “There's maid and hotel guest,” he said, counting on his fingers, “or teacher and student or doctor and patient or boss and subordinate. The last one wouldn't really be roleplay since I am your I'm your boss.”

She snorted.

“I am a level higher than you!”

She gave him a pitiful look.

He lifted his chin. “So anything strike your fancy?”

“What did you mean by teacher and student? Do you want me in a school uniform?”

“I thought more about a cooking lesson. If you want to wear a uniform for that, I won't stop you.”

“Ha. Ha.”

“You should really learn how to cook, May.”

Yeah, no, thanks. That wasn't what she had in mind. She tilted her head and nibbled on her lower lip. “Isn't there a scenario where I'm -”

“Yes?”

“Like …” She licked her lip. She could say it. If he didn't like it, they'd do something else. No big deal.  “… a sex slave?”

He just stared at her.

“Is it too much?” Yeah, it was too much. Definitely too much. Flustering him was fun, this wasn't. This was him being shocked and she felt herself blush.

He still just stared, so she had to look away.

Then he swallowed hard. “No, it's just …” He took a breath. “We could definitely do that.”

She looked up again. “Are you sure?”

He took a long sip from his wine. “This is only or fifth session and I really don't want to push you too hard.”

“So far it's usually me pushing you to try new things.”

He pulled up his shoulders. “I just want this to good for you.”

“We've got the lists, we've got the safe word and you always made it good for me so far.”

He grinned. “Cause I'm the best sex you've ever had.”

She rolled her eyes, but had to smile too. “But I also don't want to push you into something -”

“You're not.” His voice was so soft. “Just tell me what you had in mind.”

She took a deep breath. “I really like it when you take control over me and when I'm not completely sure what you're gonna do. Like, when you're in charge and I just have to obey.”

There. Lots of words from her.

And again, he stared.

“Is that bad?”

“God, I hope not, because I really enjoy those things too.” He smiled. “And thank you.”

“For what?”

“For trusting me like that. I really appreciate that.”

Sweet. He was just so damn sweet!

“Now what would you like to do tonight?”

“Whatever you want.” She shrugged. “That's the point. Whatever you want to do, I'll do.”

He put down the glass of wine. “You're sure?”

“Yes.”

“And you remember the safe word.”

Of course. She nodded.

“Ok then.” He took a deep breath and sat up straight. “I think from now on you should address me as sir, just so you remember I'm in charge.”

She grinned and put down her glass too. “Yes, sir.”

“But just when we're in here. Not at work.”

At work? “Wasn't tempted to do that, sir.”

“Good, because at work you're usually mad at me when you do.”

True. She raised a brow. “And it shall stay reserved for such situations, sir.”

“The whole slave play features punishments, too. I think we should put that bit on the backburner -”

“You should spank me.”

He blinked, but recovered quickly, “Since you forgot to address me as sir, I have to teach you some manners.”

The dress was perfect for this. He could pull her over his lap and lift that flowy skirt right over her ass and … “If I behave now, will you play with me after?” she asked.

“Well, since you're my slave …” He licked his lips and grabbed his knees with both hands. “I think I should just play with you whenever I want.”

His pants were already tented. This would be so good. She spread her legs a little.

“Are you wearing panties tonight?” he asked.

“No, sir.”

His eyes went wide. “No?”

She grinned.

“Lift your skirt.”

She obeyed, spreading her legs even further. His eyes were glued to the place between her legs.

“I want to spread you out and lick you until you come,” he growled.

She shivered. God, that would be perfect! “Yes, sir.” Whatever he wanted.

“Get up, take off the rest of your clothes and hurry.”

Again, she obeyed. The dress made it so easy! She just had to pull at the bow on her waist and she could simply let it glide off her, before she kicked off the red high heels she had paired with it.

So much for her fantasy of being spanked wearing it, but this was good, too. It was great!

His eyes wandered over her body. “Now I want you in an open stance with your arms behind your back.”

She got into position and he got off the chair. One small step and he stood right in front of her.

“See?” he asked, admiration in his voice. “Like this I can reach everywhere I want.”He dragged a finger between her tits, over her sternum and stomach, down to the few curls of hair above her blank pussy, before he cupped her in his palm.  “God, you're already wet.” He pressed his lips against her shoulder and rubbed his palm against her. His other hand grabbed her ass and squeezed, making her gasp.

“I love how excitable you are,” he mumbled and kissed her throat. “I could fuck you right now, no problem.”

“Whatever you wish, sir.”

“Still think I should call all the shots or do you want to renegotiate?”

“I made great decisions the first time.”

“Well, then.” Finally, he kissed her. Long and sweet and tender, making her crave more.

He stepped back. “Stay,” he said sternly. She wanted to argue, but he started to undress, so she just enjoyed the show.

First his jacket went on the floor, his shirt followed soon after. Next were his shoes and socks. Then his pants. And then, finally, the dark blue boxer briefs dropped to the floor as well, leaving him gloriously naked, his erection standing up. He took his cock into his right hand and stroked it, once, twice. “Do you like what you see?”

“Yes, sir.” Very much. She wanted to touch him. She wanted to taste him.

He came close again and kissed her quickly. “Good.” Another short kiss. “Now get your hands on my cock and get me off.”

o0o

NOTES: And that’s another chapter down. They’re getting bolder and bolder! I hope you still enjoy! As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts!

PREVIOUS | NEXT

[jonathantaylorthomas]

Taylor Swift's New Album 'Reputation': Everything We Know, Everything We Want

The Old Taylor can’t come to the phone? Long live the New Taylor. Reputation is one of this fall’s most tightly guarded secrets; Taylor Swift’s sixth album is her first in three years, her longest vacation ever. So far, each Swift LP has been a major musical departure. But this time, she isn’t letting any secrets slip, declining interviews and, somehow, avoiding paparazzi detection wherever she may be. All we have to go on is a quote from a source close to the project who tells Rolling Stone, “Reputation is lyrically sharper and more emotionally complex than 1989. This music has and will continue to speak for itself.”

So what do we know about Reputation? We know it has 15 songs; “…Ready For It?” will be the first track and “Look What You Made Me Do” will be the sixth. We know it drops on November 10th, which happens to be Richard Burton’s birthday. (What if that makes Reputation the Burton to Taylor’s Taylor? What if she is about to marry herself and embrace her muse as her soulmate?) It’s one day before the nine-year anniversary of Fearless, which came out in 2008 on November 11th, whereas she usually prefers to pounce in late October, as she did with Speak Now, Red and 1989. So here’s a rundown of all the clues to the burning mysteries around Reputation – what we know for sure, what we wonder, what we want, what we hope.

The sound. The first two singles are moody electro-pop: the Hot Topic quasi-goth blare of “Look What You Made Me Do” (produced by Jack Antonoff) and the hip-hop island breeze of “…Ready for It?” (produced by Max Martin, Shellback and Ali Payami). “Look What You Made Me Do” is Sal-Tay in supervillain mode; “…Ready for It?” is sultrier and far superior. Neither sounds like any of her previous work. But drastic swerves are what Swift does. All five of her previous LPs have developed a sound she could have milked for years – but she’s never made the same record twice, even when that’s what everybody wanted, from her record company to her fans.

Last time the world was hoping for Red II: Fifty Shades Redder, Red III: Revenge of the Scarf or Red IV: Maple Latte Massacre, but instead she made 1989, an album as far from Red as Speak Now was from Fearless. Nobody sane would have advised her, “You know what you should do next? Make an album that sounds nothing like Red, but exactly like Erasure or the Pet Shop Boys.” Yet Swift followed her own muse and turned out to be right – when it comes to high-risk moves that pay off, she’s gone five for five. So whatever she tries on Reputation, it won’t be what she did last time.

The romance. The line that jumps out from “…Ready For It?” is “He could be my jailer / Burton to this Taylor.” Not her usual kind of love story. Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor got married and divorced twice, which by 1970s standards made them the ultimate glamour couple – even Sonny and Cher only got to break up once. Their boozy jet-set affair lasted a total of (hmmm) 13 years, despite the fact that they basically loathed each other. Burton was fond of referring to Liz as “MGM’s Little Miss Mammary,” while she called him “the Frank Sinatra of Shakespeare.” By the time Liz was Swift’s age, she was on Husband Four; Burton was Five (and Six). So Liz and Dick weren’t exactly Romeo and Juliet – their Shakespearean duet was a 1967 film adaptation of The Taming of the Shrew. Fans have speculated the song is her ode to her beau of the past year, British actor Joe Alwyn – currently filming Mary Queen of Scots, where he plays the lover of Queen Elizabeth. Burton once got an Oscar nomination playing her father, King Henry VIII.

The playlist. Her Spotify playlist “Songs Taylor Loves” is loaded with sad weepy ballads – the side of her music missing from the two new singles. It’s also full of younger artists – from pals like Selena Gomez and Ed Sheeran to country upstarts like Maren Morris and Brett Young to indie brooders like the National and Bon Iver. But none of the legendary names Swift usually loves to invoke – the girl named after James Taylor isn’t bumping “Fire and Rain” these days. Is the playlist representative of her new music? Or is she digging these tearful ballads because she’s no longer writing them?

The cover. She’s wearing black lipstick, clearly a sign that Old Taylor is dead, given her affection for the red-lip classic thing. She gazes blearily through newspaper headlines spelling her name – math experts have counted her name on the cover 899 times. The cover’s weirdest detail: the Richard Hell-like torn sweatshirt, stitched up to create five triangular peaks, one for each previous album.

The magazines. The exclusive Target edition comes with two different 72-page magazines full of Swift’s poetry, watercolor paintings, handwritten lyrics and fashion photography. (Oh, pop stars – always secretly fantasizing about being editors of print magazines.) Judging from the cover of Reputation magazine, the typographical sensibility evokes the famously experimental (and often illegible) 1990s music mag Ray Gun.

The snakes. She’s teased the album with serpentine imagery – want to buy a $60 Gold Snake Ring? Either she’s a budding herpetologist or she’s reviving her Kimye feud. You remember – from last summer, before Kanye’s 5150 or his rock-bottom moment ass-kissing the new President. But it’s safe to surmise the feud factor will be the least intriguing aspect of Reputation, since her celebrity conflicts have been fruitless musically for all the artists involved. “Look What You Made Me Do” is much stronger than Katy Perry’s “Swish Swish” or Kanye’s “Famous,” but that’s hardly an achievement given how those remarkably wretched gaffes sandbagged the albums they were intended to launch. All evidence indicates that we’re in a post-beef era where nobody cares about pop-star feuds, since we’ve got more pressing problems. Swift sending Cardi B flowers to congratulate her on “Bodak Yellow” hitting Number One – even though it replaced “Look What You Made Me Do” – is much more in step with the 2017 zeitgeist than snake emojis, which are so last year. And you have to love how Cardi B made sure to document the flowers on Instagram, to thwart any would-be Cardor truthers.

The Drake factor. Be on guard for Drizzy content. Last year, while the rumor mill was full of reports of them hanging out and possibly working together, the two did linked Apple Music ads, one with Taylor lip-synching the Drake/Future collabo “Jumpman” and the other with Drake doing “Bad Blood.” Since Aubrey Graham is the only pop star on earth who can approach Tay’s feelings-per-minute ratio, the mind reels at how they might sound together – let’s just say they could go from zero to 100 real quick.

The shirt. The “Look What You Made Me Do” video ends with an attention-grabbing shot of Swift in a “Junior Jewels” t-shirt decorated with her friends’ names. Squadologists plotzed at the roll call, from Patrick Stewart (he’s on it twice? Make it so!) to Abigail (the “Fifteen” bestie whose wedding had Swift as a bridesmaid last month). Who’s lurking on the back of the shirt? And who’s a blank space? The most high-profile absence was Karlie Kloss, currently seen in a new Cole Haan ad campaign with well-that-escalated-quickly pal Christy Turlington. (In Elle a few weeks ago, K.K. gushed, “I am surrounded by extraordinary women – from my mom and sisters to role models like Christy Turlington, Melinda Gates, and Sheryl Sandberg, and many more.”) Will Reputation offer a state-of-the-squad update?

The exes. Just because Swift seems to be in a functional relationship, is that any reason she should keep a dignified silence about her Long List of Ex-Lovers? Dignified silence is not this lady’s style. Between Tom Hiddleston and Calvin Harris, she has some real content opportunities. In the new video, Zombie Tay digs a grave marked “Nils Sjoberg,” her ghostwriting pen name; there’s also an empty engagement-ring box. Perhaps she’s mocking Harris for both his career and love life, given that Nils Sjoberg is an anagram for “Jobless Ring”? Or maybe she’s accusing him of swiping her work, since it’s also an anagram for “Robs Jingles”? Or maybe – just maybe – anagrams are meaningless and dumb coincidences?

The tour. One thing Swift has made clear over the years – she’s not into looking back. In the spirit of Madonna or Bowie, when she tours, she focuses on the new songs, not the hits of yesteryear. It was a shocker when she left “All Too Well” off most stops of the 1989 tour, just as she left “Enchanted” and “Long Live” off the Red tour. But given the choice between reprising the oldies or showing off her new songs, she’ll go new every time. And that goes for her albums as well – she’s never been an artist who repeats herself. Don’t expect her to start now. “Honey, I rise up from the dead, I do it all the time”? Bring on the New Tay-stament.

[ts1989fanatic]

Taylor Swift's New Album 'Reputation': Everything We Know, Everything We Want

Predictions, wishful thinking based off electropop lead singles, possible hints about feuds, ex-boyfriends, squad members, where Cardi B, Drake fit in

The Old Taylor can't come to the phone? Long live the New Taylor. Reputation is one of this fall's most tightly guarded secrets; Taylor Swift's sixth album is her first in three years, her longest vacation ever. So far, each Swift LP has been a major musical departure. But this time, she isn't letting any secrets slip, declining interviews and, somehow, avoiding paparazzi detection wherever she may be. All we have to go on is a quote from a source close to the project who tells Rolling Stone, "Reputation is lyrically sharper and more emotionally complex than 1989. This music has and will continue to speak for itself."

From teenage country tracks to synth-pop anthems and little-known covers, a comprehensive assessment and celebration of Swift's one-of-a-kind songbook

So what do we know about Reputation? We know it has 15 songs; "…Ready For It?" will be the first track and "Look What You Made Me Do" will be the sixth. We know it drops on November 10th, which happens to be Richard Burton's birthday. (What if that makes Reputation the Burton to Taylor's Taylor? What if she is about to marry herself and embrace her muse as her soulmate?) It's one day before the nine-year anniversary of Fearless, which came out in 2008 on November 11th, whereas she usually prefers to pounce in late October, as she did with Speak Now, Red and 1989. So here's a rundown of all the clues to the burning mysteries around Reputation – what we know for sure, what we wonder, what we want, what we hope.

The sound. The first two singles are moody electro-pop: the Hot Topic quasi-goth blare of "Look What You Made Me Do" (produced by Jack Antonoff) and the hip-hop island breeze of "…Ready for It?" (produced by Max Martin, Shellback and Ali Payami). "Look What You Made Me Do" is Sal-Tay in supervillain mode; "…Ready for It?" is sultrier and far superior. Neither sounds like any of her previous work. But drastic swerves are what Swift does. All five of her previous LPs have developed a sound she could have milked for years – but she's never made the same record twice, even when that's what everybody wanted, from her record company to her fans.

Last time the world was hoping for Red II: Fifty Shades Redder, Red III: Revenge of the Scarf or Red IV: Maple Latte Massacre, but instead she made 1989, an album as far from Red as Speak Now was from Fearless. Nobody sane would have advised her, "You know what you should do next? Make an album that sounds nothing like Red, but exactly like Erasure or the Pet Shop Boys." Yet Swift followed her own muse and turned out to be right – when it comes to high-risk moves that pay off, she's gone five for five. So whatever she tries on Reputation, it won't be what she did last time.

The romance. The line that jumps out from "…Ready For It?" is "He could be my jailer / Burton to this Taylor." Not her usual kind of love story. Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor got married and divorced twice, which by 1970s standards made them the ultimate glamour couple – even Sonny and Cher only got to break up once. Their boozy jet-set affair lasted a total of (hmmm) 13 years, despite the fact that they basically loathed each other. Burton was fond of referring to Liz as "MGM's Little Miss Mammary," while she called him "the Frank Sinatra of Shakespeare." By the time Liz was Swift's age, she was on Husband Four; Burton was Five (and Six). So Liz and Dick weren't exactly Romeo and Juliet – their Shakespearean duet was a 1967 film adaptation of The Taming of the Shrew. Fans have speculated the song is her ode to her beau of the past year, British actor Joe Alwyn – currently filming Mary Queen of Scots, where he plays the lover of Queen Elizabeth. Burton once got an Oscar nomination playing her father, King Henry VIII.

The playlist. Her Spotify playlist "Songs Taylor Loves" is loaded with sad weepy ballads – the side of her music missing from the two new singles. It's also full of younger artists – from pals like Selena Gomez and Ed Sheeran to country upstarts like Maren Morris and Brett Young to indie brooders like the National and Bon Iver. But none of the legendary names Swift usually loves to invoke – the girl named after James Taylor isn't bumping "Fire and Rain" these days. Is the playlist representative of her new music? Or is she digging these tearful ballads because she's no longer writing them?

The cover. She's wearing black lipstick, clearly a sign that Old Taylor is dead, given her affection for the red-lip classic thing. She gazes blearily through newspaper headlines spelling her name – math experts have counted her name on the cover 899 times. The cover's weirdest detail: the Richard Hell-like torn sweatshirt, stitched up to create five triangular peaks, one for each previous album

The magazines. The exclusive Target edition comes with two different 72-page magazines full of Swift's poetry, watercolor paintings, handwritten lyrics and fashion photography. (Oh, pop stars – always secretly fantasizing about being editors of print magazines.) Judging from the cover of Reputation magazine, the typographical sensibility evokes the famously experimental (and often illegible) 1990s music mag Ray Gun.

The snakes. She's teased the album with serpentine imagery – want to buy a $60 Gold Snake Ring? Either she's a budding herpetologist or she's reviving her Kimye feud. You remember – from last summer, before Kanye's 5150 or his rock-bottom moment ass-kissing the new President. But it's safe to surmise the feud factor will be the least intriguing aspect of Reputation, since her celebrity conflicts have been fruitless musically for all the artists involved. "Look What You Made Me Do" is much stronger than Katy Perry's "Swish Swish" or Kanye's "Famous," but that's hardly an achievement given how those remarkably wretched gaffes sandbagged the albums they were intended to launch. All evidence indicates that we're in a post-beef era where nobody cares about pop-star feuds, since we've got more pressing problems. Swift sending Cardi B flowers to congratulate her on "Bodak Yellow" hitting Number One – even though it replaced "Look What You Made Me Do" – is much more in step with the 2017 zeitgeist than snake emojis, which are so last year. And you have to love how Cardi B made sure to document the flowers on Instagram, to thwart any would-be Cardor truthers.

The Drake factor. Be on guard for Drizzy content. Last year, while the rumor mill was full of reports of them hanging out and possibly working together, the two did linked Apple Music ads, one with Taylor lip-synching the Drake/Future collabo "Jumpman" and the other with Drake doing "Bad Blood." Since Aubrey Graham is the only pop star on earth who can approach Tay's feelings-per-minute ratio, the mind reels at how they might sound together – let's just say they could go from zero to 100 real quick.

The shirt. The "Look What You Made Me Do" video ends with an attention-grabbing shot of Swift in a "Junior Jewels" t-shirt decorated with her friends' names. Squadologists plotzed at the roll call, from Patrick Stewart (he's on it twice? Make it so!) to Abigail (the "Fifteen" bestie whose wedding had Swift as a bridesmaid last month). Who's lurking on the back of the shirt? And who's a blank space? The most high-profile absence was Karlie Kloss, currently seen in a new Cole Haan ad campaign with well-that-escalated-quickly pal Christy Turlington. (In Elle a few weeks ago, K.K. gushed, "I am surrounded by extraordinary women – from my mom and sisters to role models like Christy Turlington, Melinda Gates, and Sheryl Sandberg, and many more.") Will Reputation offer a state-of-the-squad update?

The exes. Just because Swift seems to be in a functional relationship, is that any reason she should keep a dignified silence about her Long List of Ex-Lovers? Dignified silence is not this lady's style. Between Tom Hiddleston and Calvin Harris, she has some real content opportunities. In the new video, Zombie Tay digs a grave marked "Nils Sjoberg," her ghostwriting pen name; there's also an empty engagement-ring box. Perhaps she's mocking Harris for both his career and love life, given that Nils Sjoberg is an anagram for "Jobless Ring"? Or maybe she's accusing him of swiping her work, since it's also an anagram for "Robs Jingles"? Or maybe – just maybe – anagrams are meaningless and dumb coincidences?

The tour. One thing Swift has made clear over the years – she's not into looking back. In the spirit of Madonna or Bowie, when she tours, she focuses on the new songs, not the hits of yesteryear. It was a shocker when she left "All Too Well" off most stops of the 1989 tour, just as she left "Enchanted" and "Long Live" off the Red tour. But given the choice between reprising the oldies or showing off her new songs, she'll go new every time. And that goes for her albums as well – she's never been an artist who repeats herself. Don't expect her to start now. "Honey, I rise up from the dead, I do it all the time"? Bring on the New Tay-stament.

[my-name-is-kat-nis-blog]

Audition Monologue Choices for Silent Sky

Teach Me How to Cry By Patrictia Joudry MELINDA It’s cloudy. It’s going to rain. Do you like rain? I love it. I love it better than anything in the world. I like to be out in it. When it rains in the night, I get up and sit looking at it, and want to go out in the rain. (pause) Will you be going away? You will, won’t you? (No answer. She goes front and looks down) The cliff is steep. I look up at it sometimes when I’m walking home from school. If a person fell down that cliff, they’d be killed. Or if they were pushed. Stop talking to me. You talk and talk and I don’t understand. Go on then! As far away as you want! I don’t know why we came to this terrible place. I hate it here. There aren’t any flowers-nothing. There used to be music here. It was springtime, like now, only people used to come here. They were in love, and they listened to the music. A band played. They were sad. I seem to know it. I seem to hear the music. It makes me want to cry. No, I never cry. I’m cold-it’s getting cold. It’s like crying. Like the sky crying. What? My mother isn’t insane. That’s-a-terrible-thing to say. There isn’t anything the matter with her! She’s-she acts perfectly fine. She’s just young. (pleading) There’s nothing wrong with being young! My mother isn’t old! My mother is never tired! My mother looks after me. She’s always there-for me to go home to-and we talk. I can tell her about things-I can ask her things too! Anything! Anything at al! She helps me to understand. She knows about me- (slight pause) When you want to know something, you ask your mother. When you’re lonely, you go to your mother and she explains things and you’re not lonely anymore. When you don’t understand-when you’re frightened in the nightwhen you’re hurt-your mother makes things better. She puts her arms around you, and you can lean on her. You can lean on her. (she is looking front) No, I’m not crying. It’s the rain. They dry by themselves.

DIARY OF ANNE FRANK ANNE Look, Peter, the sky. (she looks up through the skylight) What a lovely, lovely day! Aren't the clouds beautiful? You know what I do when it seems as if I couldn't stand being cooped up for one more minute? I think myself out. I think myself on a walk in the park where I used to go with Pim. Where the jonquils and the crocus and the violets grow down the slopes. You know the most wonderful part about thinking yourself out? You can have it any way you like. You can have roses and violets and chrysanthemums all blooming at the same time? It's funny. I used to take it all for granted. And now I've gone crazy about everything to do with nature. Haven't you? (softly) I wish you had a religion, Peter. Oh, I don't mean you have to be Orthodox, or believe in heaven and hell and purgatory and things. I just mean some religion. It doesn't matter what. Just to believe in something! When I think of all that's out there. The trees. And flowers. And seagulls. When I think of the dearness of you, Peter. And the goodness of people we know. Mr. Kraler, Miep, Dirk, the vegetable man, all risking their lives for us everyday. When I think of these good things, I'm not afraid any more. I find myself, and God, and I... We're not the only people that've had to suffer. There've always been people that've had to. Sometimes one race, sometimes another, and yet...I know it's terrible, trying to have any faith when people are doing such horrible things, but you know what I sometimes think? I think the world may be going through a phase, the way I was with Mother. It'll pass, maybe not for hundreds of years, but some day I still believe, in spite of everything, that people are really good at heart. Peter, if you'd only look at it as part of a great pattern? That we're just a little minute in the life? (she breaks off) Listen to us, going at each other like a couple of stupid grownups! Look at the sky now. Isn't it lovely?

From Transit of Venus by Maureen Hunter Canada Playwrights Express CELESTE No. I don‟t do it, you see. I don‟t do any of it. I don‟t baste, I don‟t sew, I don‟t knit, I don‟t mend, I don‟t darn, I don‟t tat, I don‟t embroider and I do not do petti-point! I do, however, read. And because I can read, I can learn. Oh, I can‟t actually travel – you have the advantage of me there - but I can read about travel, I can dream about it, I can imagine what it‟s like. I‟ve been everywhere with you. You don‟t know it, but I have. I know every inch of sea you‟ve sailed, every island you‟ve set foot on. I know how the rains come sweeping across the mountains of Ile de France, and how the island itself lies curled in the sea like an oyster. I know about the doldrums and trade winds and tides. Tides! Tides are so mysterious. We‟ve known about them since the days of Alexander, yet there‟s so much we don‟t know. Why, for instance are there two high tides and two low tides every day in some places, and only one in others? Why the tides of Saint Malo rise almost ten meters and only a fraction of that on the islands you visited? They do; did you know that? I want to know why. I want to know everything there is to know before I die. This was your gift to me, you see? You pointed me at the sky and said, look! And when I looked, what did I see? Mirrors! Mirrors reflecting mirrors reflecting mirrors, on and on to infinity. So much to know, so much to learn, so much to wonder about. Once you begin to wonder, it‟s impossible, isn‟t it – inconceivable! – to abandon that sense of wonder for anything as straight-forward and mundane as a needle and a piece of thread.

A Talk In The Park CONFUSIONS By Alan Ayckbourn BERYL Thanks. Sorry, only the man over there won’t stop talking. I wanted to read this in peace. I couldn’t concentrate. He just kept going on and on about his collections or something. I normally don’t mind too much, only if you get a letter like this, you need all your concentration. You can’t have people talking in your ear – especially when you’re trying to decipher writing like this. He must have been stoned out of his mind when he wrote it. It wouldn’t be unusual. Look at it. He wants me to come back. Some hopes. To him. He’s sorry, he didn’t mean to do what he did, he won’t do it again I promise, etc., etc. I seem to have heard that before. It’s not the first time, I can tell you. And there’s no excuse for it, is there? Violence. I mean, what am I supposed to do? Keep going back to that? Every time he loses his temper he … I mean, there’s no excuse. A fracture, you know. It was nearly a compound fracture. That’s what they told me. (indicating her head) Right here. You can practically see it to this day. Two X-rays. I said to him when I got home, I said, “You bastard, you know what you did to my head?” He just stands there. The way he does. “Sorry,” he says, “I’m ever so sorry.” I told him, I said, “You’re a bastard, that’s what you are. A right, uncontrolled, violent, bad-tempered bastard.” You know what he said? He says, “You call me a bastard again and I’ll smash your stupid face in”

A RAISIN IN THE SUN, by Lorraine Hansberry This play focuses on the Youngers, an African-American family living on the South Side of Chicago in the 1950s. When the play begins, the family is about to receive an insurance check for $10,000 from their deceased father’s life insurance policy. Each member of the family has an idea as to what this money should be used for. Beneatha tries to convince her brother and mother to use the money for her medical school tuition. BENEATHA: When I was small… we used to take our sleds out in the wintertime and the only hills we had were the ice-covered stone steps of some houses down the street. And we used to fill them in with snow and make them smooth and slide down them all day… and it was very dangerous, you know… far too steep… and sure enough one day a kid named Rufus came down too fast and hit the sidewalk and we saw his face just split open right there in front of us… And I remember standing there looking at his bloody open face thinking that was the end of Rufus. But the ambulance came and they took him to the hospital and they fixed the broken bones and sewed it all up… and the next time I saw Rufus he just had a little line down the middle of his face…. I never got over that… What one person could do for another, fix him up – sew up the problem, make him all right again. That was the most marvelous thing in the world... I wanted to do that. I always thought it was the one concrete thing in the world a human being could do. Fix up the sick, you know – and make them whole again. This was truly being God… It used to be so important to me. It used to matter. I used to care. Yes – I think [I stopped]. Because it doesn’t seem deep enough, close enough to what ails mankind! It was a child’s way of seeing things – or an idealist’s. You are still where I left off. You with all of your talk and dreams about Africa! You still think you can patch up the world. Cure the Great Sore of Colonialism – (loftily, mocking it) with the Penicillin of Independence - ! Independence and then what? What about the crooks and thieves and just plain idiots who will come into power and steal and plunder the same as before – only now they will be black and do it in the name of the new independence – WHAT ABOUT THEM?

[dc41896]

Valentine’s Special

Pairing: Lewis Tan x Black Reader

Warning(s): None💕

A/N: So this was supposed to come out on Valentine’s Day, but things got a little hectic so I couldn’t finish it when I wanted. However although it’s a little late, I hope you guys like it!! 😊

“I wanna be, where the people are. I wanna see, wanna see em dancing!”

“Not today you don’t girl trust me,” you speak to yourself, taking a bite of your Hershey’s bar.

Being with Lewis, you know there would be times that he’d be away filming. And while you were understanding how that was part of the job, that didn’t take away the pain of being away from him. Especially on days like today.

Although it was adorable seeing everyone with their Valentine’s Day cards and gifts, it did put you more in your feelings since you were alone. He messaged you earlier in the morning saying how much he missed and loved you, and had a beautiful bouquet of various flowers sent to the apartment, which made you smile, but it wasn’t the same as having him physically there.

So here you were, sitting on the couch watching Disney movies and eating chocolate to try to brighten your mood.

“Alright bish grab ya stuff and let’s go!!,” your best friend, Hailey, shouts coming through your front door.

“Remind me to take back my key,” you respond sitting up.

“1. Rude 2. You’re not having a pity party because you’re alone today are you?”

“No. I can’t just watch Disney movies in peace?”

“You can, but I know you and when you watch the princess movies, that means you’re in your feelings,” she answers with a smug smile as if to say “tell me I’m wrong I dare you.”

“Ok I may be a little in my feelings because Lewis isn’t here.”

“Mhmm I know.” Sitting beside you on the couch, she lightly rubs your back as she embraces you in a hug.

“It’s gonna be ok. Mr. Long, Tan, and Handsome will be back before you know it.”

“I can’t stand you,” you laugh smacking her arm as you both pulled away. Ever since they first met, they were always going back and forth with each other. It was as if they were long lost siblings with how much teasing they did.

“Alright now go and get dressed so we can go out! I’m not letting you stay in this apartment all day.”

“Fine, I’ll go,” you dramatically sigh, standing up to do as you were told.

“Ohh and do a full beat too! You might be in your feelings, but as your bestie I’m also not letting you out looking any less than the queen you are.”

“Aww thanks LeLe!”

“You’re welcome! Now hurry up because I’m starting to get hungry.”

“And you call me the rude one,” you laugh walking to your room to get ready.

———

“Y/N!!! You look so pretty in that!!!,” Hailey gushes like a proud mom sending her daughter off to prom.

Wearing a dark blue slightly asymmetrical mini skirt with a grey long sleeve top, you give a small twirl while batting your lashes.

“Yasss look at how bomb my best friend looks y’all!!,” she says while holding her phone and circling around you.

“Shh there are other people in this store!,” you whisper, laughing as you try to block the camera.

“They’ll be alright. Ohh you know what would look super cute with that?! These boots!”

Black, suede, and fitted like sock, the block heeled booties were gorgeous and would definitely go well with the outfit. That is until you saw the price.

“Um did you see the price though? These boots are $80! Put that together with this outfit I’m looking at $150.”

“Don’t worry about it, I got it taken care of.”

“Hailey if you’re thinking about stealing so help me-,”

“No! What kind of person do you think I am?,” she gasps, feigning as if she’s been offended. “My friend works here and owes me a few favors so I got all this at a good price.”

“Wait, you mean you already paid for this?!”

“And the shoes,” Hailey adds, showing off the boot as if she was on the Price is Right.

“I know you’re gonna try to say no, but I’m your friend and want to treat you to something nice, also don’t worry about my hookup she won’t get in trouble I promise.”

You still wanted to protest and tell the employee to redo everything, but then again everything was already done so there was nothing you could really do.

“Thank you Hailey, you really didn’t have to do this. I promise to pay you back,” you smile hugging her.

“I know I didn’t have to, I wanted to though! And if you try to give me money I’ll smack it out of your hand and stuff it back in your purse!,” she laughs.

“So rude and violent. Alright let me change and we can go eat, I know you’re starving.”

“Orrr...you can just wear that out the store!”

“Is that allowed?”

“Yea! Right Kasey?,” she asks turning towards the brunette behind the counter, who nods with a smile before walking over to the two of you to help take off the tags.

———

Singing to the top of your lungs as you drove through town listening to the radio, you were happy to finally have your mind off of feeling alone. And yea you still missed Lewis, but having your friend keep you company definitely took some of those sad feelings away. You still tried to check here and there to see if he updated his stories, but Hailey always managed to take your phone just as you opened the app.

“The point of today is to get you OUT of your feelings not back into it,” she’d always say before cutting your screen off and handing it back to you.

After some time, you finally arrived to your destination making you instantly turn to look at Hailey in disbelief.

“I thought the point was for me to not be in my feelings?,” you ask, arms crossed in front of you. “This is where Lewis and I went on our first date.”

“Ok first of all, we’ve known about this place way before you and fist of fury started dating so this is equally our spot as much as it is yalls. Second, I’m sorry that they have bomb milkshakes which I’m in the mood for and know you’re always down for, so let’s go.”

Sliding out of the car, you both enter the unusually empty diner. Hailey literally bouncing as she entered the booth with her menu in hand, and you missing Lewis more than ever as you reminisce on your first date and the other good times you’ve had.

“Here let me take your picture. Not only do you look super cute, but you can send it to your man to show where you went today.”

“Nooo just let me order my food please,” you groan like a toddler begging to play longer.

“Me taking your picture is not gonna affect you ordering,” she replies with a laugh. “Now c’mon smile.”

With your chin propped on your hand, you smile before taking a couple more pictures making silly faces.

“Ok so far this one is my favorite and I think you’ll love it too.”

Turning the phone towards you, you immediately feel tears threaten to fall and surely mess up your makeup. While you were smiling, over your shoulder was Lewis sitting in the booth behind you, with a finger over his lips as he winked while holding a small black box.

“Happy Valentine’s Day love!,” he smiled as you turned around to face the love of your life.

“Are you serious right now?!,” you ask, watching as he gets down on one knee.

“Yes I am, and I hope you feel the same when I ask you Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N if you don’t mind spending the rest of your life with me and be my wife?”

“Yes, of course I’ll be your wife!,” you smile as he slides the circular diamond ring on your finger before kissing you.

“Aww I’m gonna be a maid of honor!,” Hailey claps making both you and Lewis laugh.

“Wait aren’t you supposed to be filming in Canada?”

“I am, but we got a break for a couple of days so I planned this whole thing out with the help of jabber jaws over here,” he replies tilting his head towards Hailey.

“Listen you just got engaged and I’m trying to be nice jolly green giant,” she retorts making him roll his eyes.

“You were the one that bought the outfit too weren’t you? And that explains why someone said I should do a full beat.”

“Yea I gave Hailey my card info and told her to treat you to anything you wanted. Whatever store you were in, I called to make sure there were no problems with her trying to use it. Also might I add you look gorgeous as always.”

Leaning in, Lewis kisses you again pulling you closer towards him as Hailey jokingly gags, making him flick her off before pulling away.

“Well it looks like my job here is done, so I’m gonna leave you love birds to it.”

“What about your milkshake?”

“Oh I’m still gonna get it. I know you guys probably want some alone time though so I’ll see you later,” she waves as she stands up beside the booth. “Also if my future niece/nephew happens to be conceived tonight, I will gladly accept them being named after me.”

“Bye Hailey,” you and Lewis reply at the same time with a laugh.

“And thanks for helping Hailey, this couldn’t have happened without you,” he adds with a smile.

“No problem, yall are my family you know I’d do anything for you guys.” Blowing you both kisses, she grabs her Oreo milkshake before walking out the glass doors to get in her car.

“So you like your surprise?”

“I love it, which reminds me,” you start before smacking him in the arm. “How could you play with my emotions like that?!”

“Ow! I didn’t do it to be mean, it was for your surprise. I sowwy!,” pouting his lips, he gently joins his forehead with yours before continuously pecking your lips until you giggled.

“Alright in this case you’re forgiven. But try not to make a habit out of it, I don’t know if my heart can take it.”

“Anything you say Mrs. Tan,” he smiles chuckling as he places an arm around your shoulders and kisses your forehead.

Taglist: @crushed-pink-petals @fumbling-fanfics @honeychicana @lady-olive-oil @themyscxiras @melinda-january @lovelymari4 @beautym3 @nunubug99 @felicity-x0 @ellixthea @jojolu @jnk-812 @brwn-sgr @captainsamwlsn @itshinothey @wildfirecracker @nina-sj

If anybody wants to be tagged, has asked to be tagged but don’t see your name, or only wants to be tagged for certain people I write for just let me know🤓!

[perrytheplaidypus]

She is perfect (and that’s enough)

What if Phil and Melinda were married during The Avengers and May was pregnant?

He knew he should probably listen closely to what Stark and Banner were discussing on catching Loki, but with every minute that went passing by his mind wandered further away to his with miles away carrying their child. It was the first one for both Phil and Melinda, so his nervousness was growing every second he got no report on her status. He checked his phone twice every minute, even though he had sound just for Melinda calling or writing him. In the corner of his vision he saw Nat leaving with Dr. Banner, probably to show him his lab. His heart was racing, he could punch himself for loosing his cool of all in front off Captain America, his childhood hero, one of the last thing he remembered of his father. Normally he wouldn't be on the edge so extraordinary and that story that he nearly went unconscious whilst discovering him in the ice, he let that one slip because he got a text that moment that the baby could be on it's way – which was a false alarm, but still, it bended Phils nerves so much. One day, Phil knew, he would regret talking to the Cap just in that moment, but he couldn't help it, he had no idea when he would get a second chance on this. They got the location of Loki in Stuttgart when his phone made that sound – the Game of Thrones title music – which she cursed him for, but it had the right amount of alert in it and he loved it. “Excuse me, please” he said, while looking directly on his phone, not hearing the answer either the Agent, Cap or Fury would have given him, and walked straight to the next corridor before answering his phone. “Is everything okay!?” In hindsight, he should not sound panicked when talking to a pregnant Melinda May. “Hey. Nice to hear your voice.” She sounded sarcastic which was a good sign. But on the other hand, she could give birth to their child right now and would probably still be calm as hell. He let out a deep breath, forcing himself to calm down, just for his wife. “I'm sorry, I'm nervous and I hate myself for not being there with you-” “Which I still hate you for” “You don't hate me.” “Yes, I do.” “Remember, you said that once”, he smiled for real for the first time since he left her, “that's why we are in our current situation.” Phil could practically here her grinning, the pregnancy made her smile more often than ever before and he loved her like that. “Look, we discussed this, Fury would have both our asses kicked for hiding our marriage and that's nothing I want to deal with in the moment. So when he says I have to be on this assignment I would have no plausible excuse for denying that. And it concerns Stark, and he is, according to Fury, my damn responsibility and my problem.” “I know. It's just... It's only one week left until I'm due, but you know I sleep better with you beside me and it is your child, so he could've been there last week just to annoy me.” “Hey! Not fair. He or she is also your child, which is definitely true, because that kid makes me so tense I fear I'll get a heart attack at any given moment.” They couldn't help but laugh, they felt ridiculous considering becoming parents in their forties and being trained Agents and still become so anxious about something they made themselves. Phil would probably never believe that they indeed managed to make it this far, despite all their horrors in the past. “Everything will be good” he assured her. “We will have a child together Mel, we will see it growing, walking, talking and laughing and everything will turn out right, because this one little thing I strongly believe we earned. And I love you so much and that will never change.” Phil could here her crying silently, which was not what he intended. “Please stop, you know how emotional I am these days” she let out a small laugh and he couldn't stop smiling, he must look like an idiot to everyone seeing him from afar. But he didn't care, he was so happy, nothing could change that. “I love you too. You mean everything to me. Please, just come home safe, Phil.” “You know me. I will be careful, for you, and the little one.” Before he could say bye, Melinda urged him to wait a moment, and then, there it was, a small noise from his moving child. It wasn't the same, but he whispered trough the phone to his kid, letting it hear his voice again. Then he heard the engines turn down a bit, which meant they arrived at their destination, and he could here Melinda was on the speaker again. “I have to go, I love you.” “I love you too, bye.” “Bye.”

Three hours later they got Thor's half-brother and the god of thunder himself on the ship, who greeted Phil, to the surprise of many, with a big smile and a bear hug. Looking back at his life, he would never have thought to get this much affection from someone who is basically a god from another world who he spoken to one time. He seemed to have impressed that man. But it did nothing but putting another level to his tension, with him becoming a father and Nat interrogating this crazy god in their basement. And then everything went down...

First, he got a message from May. Phil assumed she was just bored and wanted to write him some stuff, but when it said that the contractions were coming early and that she already was in the hospital, he nearly lost it completely. A second later, there was a convulsion and one of the circulator turbines went off. They stood under attack. Barton, under the control of Loki, was invading the helicarrier. Over radio Fury told him to get that shiny new weapon they had built and then secure the detention cell. He barely got the time to write Melinda that he loves her, before the next turbine went down. Phil ran down the stairs to the excluded part of the armoury before facing Loki. He knew he had no chance, but as long as it gave the team time, it was enough. It had to be. It would be his last act in this, his last role. In his mind, he joked, now they had something to avenge. He would actually chuckle if his lung wouldn't fill itself slowly with blood and his heart torn apart. Then his phone made a sound. He used his last strength and looked at it, finding a small video file of his newborn sleeping daughter and he smiled. He smiled while the tears were streaming down his face in a rush and he typed with bloodied fingers. She is perfect. What name? A second later, he got an answer. Daisy. Daisy Coulson. His smile went wider, the tears still coming. Their precious little flower. You two mean everything to me. It was the last thing he wrote, Phil never saw her answer when Fury came rushing in, trying to keep him awake, but there was nothing to be done for him. His girls were save and his and Melinda´s daughter the most beautiful thing in this world. She is perfect. It's enough.