#i am gonna govern my wretched little space protectorate....it is dead serious to me.....

[s1ithers]

rt posting // finished ch3. love the torture elves, hysterical 10/10. obsessed with how the game pits altruism against your responsibility to your people against the culture around your character. do something good & compassionate by player standards/treasonous in-universe, get absolutely kicked in the teeth for it, and have your companions call you to account afterwards... exactly what i want from an rpg, thank you

like i'm sure it has another way to get you through the plot if you don't agree to help Y, but i was thinking while doing it, hm. this is an action i am taking with videogame protagonist-like disregard for consequences bc i personally want to, despite how hard it would be for my char to justify, even if /she/ personally wants to! & then to just eat shit for the rest of the chapter. v satisfying. love a game that doesn't let you tramp all over its internal consistency to be a hero. love a world that pushes back <3

almost wonder if i got some sort of bug with the romance being weirdly (not) integrated? with H going from v sweet to Mad as Hell. (and like thank god they voiced that bit in case the text didn't fully convey how blisteringly he despises you for this lmao x_x christ alive. the VAs are gr8). but honestly only needed like one or two lines of transition bc it's a great conflict. what if your existence was only excused by your purpose & your purpose was fighting one enemy but the one person who treats you as more than that keeps falling for that enemy's lures. what a knife in the heart. bc the dismissal of your function is a dismissal of YOU but at the same time....you've already bitten the hook of that same mercy, haven't u :3

honestly would've liked a chance to say sorry i got us all trapped in the torment nexus. bc it's ultimately my responsibility right, yrliet doesn't command this vessel. i'm gleaning that admitting that to the group might be a somewhat uh avant-garde leadership style for these ppl but twould be nice to say it to ur lover what with the torture n all

reconciliation scene could be so good bc like what if we were two people with something tender & fragile growing between us. but also a traitor to humanity & an agent of the inquisition. but also a psyker who laid powers on the absolute ruler of the sector etc etc

and perhaps some dialogue option wherein you ask /why?/ and i could say it was out of friendship with a xenos. absolute super mega heresy. handing you the weapon to destroy me to prove my sincerity but like. like. the power play of knowing you won't use it.

could be sexy.

(but then ofc power play is the only language we speak, so maybe what i really want is to trust you. it's about the plausible deniability it's about the misdirection)

anyway. forcing me into a public judgment of my other not-lover in a way that also functions as a proxy trial for my own failings in That Whole Situation, both undermining my authority & creating the chance to shore it back up IF i give the rest of the crew their pound of flesh (realigning the emperor's chosen with the path of righteousness & oh so conveniently, with him over her), an hour after we /finally/ tore each other's clothes off is sooo. fun n flirty. peak shit. because as we know! the most important element of a healthy ship is trust :)