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the-cult-of-russo · 2 years ago

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Darkness Forever

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: cursing, angst, pain, dark shit, smut, idk lmao

A/N: So I can’t manage the next chapter of JBTF with how sick I am, but I wanted to at least try and give you guys something. This is a gift for @idaofinfinity . Thank you for cheering me on so much and always touching me with your amazingly kind words. I just wanted to show you how much I appreciate you being my biggest cheerleader since I came back.

As always, I love all of you guys and I appreciate all the well wishes you’ve sent me.

Side note; the Reader in this one is based off an OC I made for a different fandom and I’ve wanted to do this idea for a while.

Name of this one is from a song of the same name by Soccer Mommy.

Head in the oven

Didn't sound so crazy

My brain was burnin'

Hot to the touch

Lithium readings

Makin' me dizzy

They keep my feelings

Simmering low

Darkness forever

A cold sinking ocean

I wanna feel the

Warm of release

The devil is chasing

Hot on my tail and

Tryin' to struggle

Out of his leash

Words from an artist

Killed by their insides

She tried to set the

Evil on fire

It's warm in the kitchen

Like hot sticky summer

Demons are rising

Up with the smoke

---------

The club was loud but you ignored the noise, the constant buzzing in your ears as your eyes drifted around. You could see clearly even in the dimly lit space as you were trying to find your target for the night. No one had jumped out at you yet, no one really intriguing enough to capture your interest. But then you saw him. He was sitting off in a corner with some guys, the group being rowdy. He stuck out like a sore thumb with his face littered with scars like that but he was easily the most beautiful human you’d ever laid eyes on, and you’d seen a lot of them. The darkness that curled around him was like a siren calling out to you and it made a thrill trickle down your spine, a slow smirk curling your lips. You sat in your spot for a while, eyes never leaving him as he talked with the guys he was with. They were all trouble, you could feel it. This one though, he was something else. When he got up and walked over to the bar, you licked your lower lip before standing, sauntering over with no hesitation. You stood next to him at the bar and he turned his gaze to you briefly, checking out who was next to him. But as he was turning away again, dark eyes turned back to you, interest and curiosity burning in them and you could sense his desire as his eyes raked over your form.

“Hello there,” you smirked, eyes glittering mischievously that had his own lips quirking up a little. He seemed slightly surprised but you figured it was about his face. You’d seen some of the looks he was getting here, saw how the girls pulled their faces and barely shot him a glance after that. Honestly, you thought they were all fucking brain-dead.

“Hi,” he drawled, giving you another once over. The scars did little to detract from his handsome face and you didn’t think you’d ever seen eyes that dark before.

“So… I was getting kind of bored and then I saw you. You look like the kinda guy that could show me a good time,” you flashed him a sultry smile and he chuckled, the sound low and rich and filling you with need you hadn’t felt in a very long time.

“Is that right?” he asked smoothly, a smirk on his lips. Your eyes drifted over him in a way that made his eyes darken, as if he could sense your need for him without words.

“I’m Y/N,” you purred, reaching your hand over and settling it over his. The moment you made contact with him, you got what you needed. The flashes burst behind your eyes and in seconds you knew exactly who this man was, knew everything he’d ever done. Knowing just what the darkness was that surrounded him lured you in even more and you could feel how damp your panties were getting now you knew just what he was capable of.

“Billy,” he supplied, eyeing you like he wanted to devour you. You shot him a wolfish grin at the thought. You leaned closer to him, biting your lower lip and his eyes were drawn to the motion.

“Well, Billy… How about you take me back to your place?” you asked with a raised brow. He smirked once more, anticipation flashing behind his eyes that dragged over your body slowly like he could see what lay under your clothes.

“Sounds good to me,” he replied easily, slamming back the drink the bartender had settled in front of him during the exchange. He didn’t even say anything to the guys he’d been with as he stood, so tall he was looming over you. He shot you a devilish smile before he guided you out of the bar.

His place turned out to be a motel and it was a pretty seedy one at that. You hadn’t been surprised though, you’d already seen it when you came in contact with him. The second he had you inside of his room, you were pressed against the door as his mouth claimed yours desperately. He kissed like it would be his last kiss on earth, a real toe-curling kiss that his whole body seemed to move with as he pressed against you. You moaned, your hands fisted in the front of his black t-shirt as you kissed back fervently and arched against him. It drew a delicious moan out of him and you were almost purring. You pulled away, the pair of you panting and you were surprised to find your hands were shaking a little with how tightly wound with desire you were. You grabbed his hand, moving around him and leading him over to the beat-up sofa on one side of the room. He followed obediently and you pushed him to sit on it, causing him to chuckle darkly as he tilted his head watching you. You moved to straddle him and his hands grabbed your hips with no hesitation. One of your hands splayed on his chest, the other going to his short hair as you raked your nails over his scalp. His eyes fluttered shut for a moment, a soft moan leaving his lips as he leaned into your touch. He reminded you of a cat.

“If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?” you asked curiously. His eyes opened then, confused and mildly curious about your weird question in the middle of something like this. You felt his hands flex on your hips as he licked his lower lip, eyes dipping to your chest before back to your face as you blinked down at him patiently.

“You, naked and writhin’ under me,” he replied easily, an impish smile on his face. Your lips curled into a smile as you scraped your nails over his scalp once more and he hummed softly, once again leaning into it. He didn’t close his eyes this time and his obsidian gaze stayed locked on you.

“I mean it… if you could have one thing in the world, anything… what would it be?” you asked again, a little firmer this time. His eyes narrowed for only a moment and you started to think he wouldn't indulge your curiosity as he looked away briefly. A haunted look passed on his face and his fingers dug into your hips a little before he tugged his eyes back to your face.

“I’d… I’d go back… change some shit. Make better choices, pick the right people,” he answered honestly. How disappointing. You’d half expected him to ask for his looks back, knowing how much it bothered him. Or maybe he wanted to be able to get revenge on his former best friend that had done this to him. You hadn’t expected this with the darkness that blanketed him but you could feel it now. The guilt, the heartbreak, the self-loathing. And while he was purposely vague in his answer, he had no idea you already knew. You knew just what he was talking about. He wanted to go back and not betray Frank Castle, not lose the family that had taken him in. He wanted to live the life he should have had if he hadn’t given in to temptation. You deflated a little at his answer but it didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. You’d still get what you wanted in the end anyway.

“What if I told you I could give you that?” you asked carefully, your nails still scratching at his head. He gave you a look that was partly amused and partly annoyed as he rolled his eyes.

“Yeah… okay,” he snorted. You blinked and when your eyes opened again, they were no longer the color they were a moment ago. Instead, they were black as coal, no whites to be seen. You felt him tense under you, his eyes widening a little before he squinted at you.

“What the hell are you?” he asked roughly. He was looking at you like you were a threat but you weren’t offended. Instead, his words made a rueful smile curl your lips as you looked down at him.

“I’m the things nightmares are made of, Billy,” you smirked. His breathing hitched a little yet his hands didn’t leave your hips and he didn't attempt to move you away. There was some fear there but he also gazed at you curiously and surprisingly enough, you could still feel his straining erection under you.

“I was born of fire and pain, torture and suffering. I feel like that’s something you can relate to,” you added, your smirk softening to a smile. You felt him relax a little at that, his only answer being a small nod of his head.

You weren’t what was considered a normal demon. You were one of the originals, one of the oldest. There were books out there with your name on them, telling terrifying tales of the ‘Bringer of Chaos’ and the ‘Princess of Hell’. You’d been Lucifer's favorite once upon a time. He’d taken a special shine to you and he’d tortured you himself. That’s how demons were made. Their souls were corrupted, their humanity literally tortured out of them until they couldn't take it anymore. Only with you, you had something no other demon still had, something Lucifer had forced you to keep. A small fragment of your soul. It wasn't a gift because he liked you, no. It was the ultimate torture, something that would ensure you would be tortured for as long as you still existed. You couldn't ignore your brutal nature, couldn't escape it. But the tiny fragment of humanity left in you was enough to cause you to feel things no demon should be able to feel. You’d gotten used to it with how old you were, you’d learned to control it for the most part. But every so often you’d snap, having moments of near hysteria or insanity as the guilt consumed you whole, forcing you to see just how much blood stained your hands. It was a curse and you despised it and in the end, you despised your maker for forcing you to keep it.

“If you want to go back and live the life you should have had, I can do that for you. You’ll remember all of this but they won’t,” you murmured, your hand moving from his head and coming to rest on his chest with your other. He shifted under you and the movement jostled you, bringing you closer to him. He didn't seem to mind it though and his dark eyes were burning into you. You could see his intrigue, could see your offer was enticing him.

“What’s the price? There’s always a price, so what do you want in return?” he asked, no smirk in sight now as his eyes pinned you in place. You licked your lower lip, looking at him under your lashes as your hands smoothed up his chest.

“Your soul. But the way I see it, you already sold yours to Rawlins a while ago and now you're suffering. This way, you get what you want,” you shrugged and you could practically feel the hope radiating from him.

“My soul…? And what does that mean? What happens with it?” he asked curiously. You sighed a little, looking off for a moment as you tried to figure out how to word it. This was always the hardest part, the part where sometimes people tried to resist. His fingers tightened on your hips and forced your eyes back to him and he raised a brow at you. He was lucky you thought he was so handsome, anyone else giving you that sassy look would be up in flames in seconds.

“It would belong to me. When it's time to collect my debt, your soul would be mine.” you answered, purposely not telling just what that entailed because you knew he didn’t like to not have control, you knew he’d struggle with it.

“How long would I have?” he asked and you could tell by his voice he’d already made his mind up. It made you smile softly.

“Five years,” you supplied. He inhaled sharply, his Adam's apple bobbing as he looked away.

“That's it?” he asked, a despondent tone to his voice.

“You’re lucky you're getting that. I usually only offer two,” you replied with a shrug. You meant it too. You weren’t quite sure what it was about the man that had you being so lenient with him, had you giving him more time that you usually bothered to give. He exhaled a shaky breath, nodding to himself before he looked back at you, a determined look on his face.

“I’ll do it,” he said firmly and you grinned at his acquiescence. You leaned in and kissed him deeply, causing him to groan as his hands slid around to your back, holding you closer.

“How do we… uh…” he asked, sounding uncertain once you broke the kiss and you smirked darkly before moving off him.

“How do you think?” you asked wolfishly, holding a hand out to him. He looked at it for a moment before he took it and stood.

You kissed him and he kissed you back just as desperately. There was something lighter about him now, the prospect of getting a do-over setting a fire inside of him. Before long, you were both free from your clothes and you were straddling him on the bed. Part of you wanted to drag this out, to make your time with him last as long as possible, but this was a job and you didn’t want him to change his mind about this. Usually, the souls you took didn’t belong to you, they just got sent down to hell. But you’d make sure your contract with him made it clear he belonged to you, you wouldn't be sharing this one with anyone. Daddy dearest wouldn't be happy about it but he shouldn't have given you the authority to make such a move to begin with. You were once again struck by the sheer possessiveness you felt over this human. You’d never felt anything quite like it. Not wanting him to change his mind, you leaned down, capturing his lips in a sinful kiss as you sunk down onto his hard and wanting cock. The pair of you moaned and his hand wound into your hair as his kisses turned more ferocious. You broke the kiss, your hands on his chest for leverage as you started riding him at a punishing pace. His face contorted with pleasure and you committed it to memory, wanting the beautiful image to remain burned in your brain forever. He was the kind of beauty that would inspire works of art. You bounced on his cock, delighted moans leaving your lips as he filled you up in the best way. He let out a dirty groan when you raked your nails down his chest, drawing a little blood and he arched up at you roughly. He looked feral and you felt like your insides were on fire with the pull you were feeling towards him. This wasn’t exactly necessary to complete the contract, if it was you’d barely get any souls. You didn’t get people like Billy very often. One of your hands slid to his throat, tightening carefully and making him gasp in pleasure as his body writhed. He had no idea just what strength lay beneath your hands, how easy it would be to snap his neck with little effort. You felt your climax coming quickly and it caught you off guard, your moans getting louder and more frequent. Your hips were stuttering as your head became cloudy with desire and he used his grip on your hips to lift you and slam you back down onto his cock roughly. Your eyes snapped open, once again black but he showed no signs of fear this time as he rut up into you, his top lip curled like an animal. You smirked at him before he cried out in pain, his body tensing as words started to litter his body, bright as the flames that were putting them there. You moaned loudly as you came hard around him, seeing your contract over his skin claiming him as yours pushing you over the edge. And despite the pain he was in, he came with a loud roar, his mouth hanging open as his body shook. You were panting as you watched his eyes flutter shut, his head lolling to the side as he passed out under you. You leaned down, placing a soft kiss to his lips before climbing off him. The words that had been branded into his skin were invisible to the naked eye but you could feel them. You didn’t think you’d ever felt so accomplished for taking a soul before. You climbed off the bed and got dressed, giving him one last look before you walked to the door.

“I’ll see you soon, Billy,” you smirked darkly, slipping out the door feeling like you were dancing on air.

—-

Five years ticked by extremely slowly and you once again found yourself doing things for Billy you never did with any of the other humans you’d made a contract with. You’d observed him carefully, watched over him in the years that went by. He’d built Anvil from the ground up with no help from Rawlins and Frank had been his partner in all of it. He was living the life he’d wished to have and he was happy. Knowing that Billy turned down Rawlins' offer and that the man was planning on taking both Billy and Frank out for their part overseas, you'd dealt with Rawlins personally. You'd had a lot of fun with the man, making sure he regretted everything he ever put Billy through, even if he didn't remember most of it with the new timeline. You stood at the corner of the street, watching as Billy sat outside at a cafe with Frank and Curtis as they ate lunch. The three of them were chatting away and laughing and you felt a bitter pang of something rip right through you. Never once, even with your pesky fragment of soul, had you wished to be human again. Never had you felt so wretched to be a monster. Watching Billy like this, you just wanted to be a normal girl by his side. To just be Y/N again. You growled to yourself before you turned on your heel and started to walk away. It was time to collect but the excitement that had been fueling you on had simmered into something else you couldn't quite place and you didn’t like it. You made your way to Anvil, knowing he would be back soon from lunch. You drew some attention when you waltzed in and as you slipped through the doors to the back rooms, Billy’s PA looked up at you. Before she could open her mouth to say anything, you waved your hand and her eyes went vacant for a second. Once it cleared, she blinked slowly before shaking her head to herself, ignoring you completely as she went back to clicking away on the keyboard and you slipped into his office. You moved over to his desk, looking over at the pictures there of him with the Castles and feeling something gnawing at your chest. You felt his presence as soon as he entered the building and you turned around, leaning back on his desk as your eyes stayed glued to the door. When it opened, he stopped abruptly as he saw you.

“Y/N…” he murmured with a shaky voice, shutting the door slowly before he stood in front of it. He seemed surprised to see you somewhat but you knew deep down he wasn’t. Not completely. Your contract with him forged a bond and you knew he’d been waiting for this day. He’d been dreading it.

“Hello, Billy,” you smiled, tiling your head at him. He looked so different from when you’d met before. Now in his suit with his perfectly styled hair and scar-free face. You wouldn't say he was more beautiful now but he was definitely happier, it was radiating off him. And you were here to take all of that away from him. He didn’t say anything as he stared at you and you pushed off the desk, trying to ignore that itching in your chest as you looked at his slightly panicked face.

“It’s time,” you said firmly, squaring your shoulders to steel yourself. His mouth opened and closed for a second, his eyes drifting to the closed door.

“I… Can I… Can I at least say goodbye?” he asked and the sheer hopelessness of his voice felt like someone stabbed you through the chest. You clenched your jaw and blew out a breath. You should tell him no, that wasn't how things worked and this wasn't on his terms. You should make it perfectly clear that he belonged to you and he was lucky. He was lucky because usually you didn't come to collect yourself. Usually, your hellhound did that for you and death by being ripped to shreds by a hellhound was a very traumatic way to go and you’d saved him from that fate by coming here yourself. You couldn't bring yourself to say those things to him though as his dark and damp eyes bore into you, your usual confidence and authority that you wielded like the dangerous weapon it was seemed to be non-existent right now. You turned around, gritting your teeth as you grabbed a pen and scribbled your current address onto a post-it note. You tore it from the others harshly, hating whatever it was you were feeling. Hating that you felt anything at all. You turned back around to face him, walking over and handing him the post-it note.

“You’ve got until tonight. Come by my place when you’re done,” you muttered, your words harsh though. He nodded shakily, blinking at you.

“Thank you,” he breathed and you forced the growl that wanted to leave your lips down as you stormed past him and slammed the door. You shook your head at yourself as you swiftly left the building and made your way to your apartment. You couldn't make sense why you were breaking so many rules with him. He was just a human. You’d never felt anything for any of them that you made a contract with and it was making your head hurt.

When you got back to your place, you sat on the sofa in silence as you tried to understand just what was going on with you. You couldn't place anything you were feeling because you weren't used to feeling much. It couldn't be guilt, not when you’d already been so merciful with him. You’d been so excited for this, waited on bated breath for the day to come when you got to take him with you, to be the one to play with him until your heart's content. So why did you feel like this? At 11 pm, your door knocked and you stood up, feeling something suspiciously like nerves prickle at you. You sneered at yourself as you moved to the door and swung it open. Billy was there but the happiness you knew he’d had earlier was gone. He looked wrecked, his face damp from tears and looking so devastated your chest felt tight. You blinked slowly at him before you moved to let him in, shutting the door behind you as he stood there anxiously.

“What's gonna… what's gonna happen to me?” he asked shakily. You’d purposely avoided it before but it wasn't like he could back out now. The contract was done so you didn’t need to be afraid he'd change his mind. It was far too late for that.

“I’m gonna kill you… I’ll make it painless. Then you’ll be going to the fire and brimstone downstairs with me. You belong to me so I’ll be the one to torture you. Eventually you’ll have a choice to make… you can continue to suffer for the rest of eternity or… or you could give up your humanity and become like me,” you murmured. You could feel the fear radiate off him in waves but worse than that was the utter devastation over what he was leaving behind. He ran a hand through his disheveled hair, his breathing coming in sharp and fast as he nodded.

“Okay… okay… I’m ready,” he muttered, not sounding ready in the least. You stepped closer to him and he tensed, closing his eyes as his jaw clenched. You frowned to yourself, his sadness felt like it was smothering you, like it was choking you and you hated it. You moved to lay your hand over his chest, hating the tightness in your own as you looked at him. Tears rolled down his perfect cheeks, his eyes still closed as he awaited whatever hell you were about to bring him. Your own distress had the paintings on the wall vibrating and it was taking all of your willpower to stop the apartment building from falling down around you. He cried out in pain and your lower lip wobbled a little, your hand not leaving his chest as he yelled and almost fell over. His skin lit up like the first time, only this time, the words started to fade from his skin slowly. When you were done, he fell to his knees before blinking up at you confused, swaying where he knelt from the pain.

“You need to leave,” you insisted firmly, unable to look at him any longer. You felt like you were wound so tightly that you were about to snap.

“What?” he asked confused, his voice raspy and raw. You sniffled, wiping your face to find horribly enough, you were crying.

“Get out! The contract’s gone!” you yelled, making him look at you in shock. The walls started to tremble like a small earthquake was sweeping through the place and he grabbed the wall to help him stand on shaky legs, looking confused and lost. You knew he wanted to ask why, that the question was on the tip of his tongue, but as the walls shook harder and the lights started to flicker, he gave you one last look before he made a mad dash to leave the apartment like he thought you might change your mind. The second your door shut, you let out a rageful yell and the entire building groaned. You could hear car alarms going off in the street as you fell to your knees on the floor. You were going to get in so much trouble for this, you knew you were. You’d be dragged back down there to be on the receiving end of the torture for a while yet for some reason, it felt better than having Billy in your place. You whimpered as you felt it, the call from the big man downstairs as he summoned you. Years felt different down there, one year felt like a hundred. You wondered if he’d torture you so much that the remaining part of your soul would be gone but you knew he wouldn’t be merciful with you, not with what you’d done. You still weren't quite sure just why you’d done it. Unsure why you had allowed a simple human to affect you so deeply.

It was supposed to be simple. You offered them whatever they wanted and you got their soul in return. You’d forget about them soon after and it would be up to your hellhound to collect them and someone else downstairs to deal with them. Yet, from the moment you laid eyes on Billy, he’d been different. There had been a pull to him like no other, a pull that had you breaking all the rules just to make things easier for him. Why did you care enough to make things easier? Why did you care to give him more time than people usually got? Why did you care so much about how wounded he was to leave this life behind now he finally got his happy ever after? You were ruthless, brutal. Your name had been nightmare-inducing for centuries with the things you’d done. You’d killed people just for the fun of it, relished in taking away things people loved just to see them hurt. Fear, pain and suffering were your heroin, the things that gave you life. Selflessness wasn’t in your nature, even if you were attached to him for some reason. You’d owned his soul, it had been yours, in writing. Any attachment you felt for him should have only increased the possessiveness you’d felt towards him, making you want him down there with you even more no matter how he felt about it. Instead, you’d broken the contract, to let him live his life until it was his time to go and he’d be doing it all without you. Why the hell had you let him go?

—-

Two Years Later

You hurried down the street, glancing at your watch as you went knowing you’d be late. Your boss really wasn't known for having patience. You heard a car honk and you glanced over your shoulder briefly, drawn by the noise, but it caused you to collide with someone in the street. You squeaked, feeling the world tilt for a second before you were caught by strong hands that helped you stay upright.

“Shit, I’m sorry… Y/N?” the voice asked. You looked up at the man as he let you go, blinking up at him in confusion.

“I’m sorry, do I know you?” you asked slowly, your eyes trailing his face. He was stupidly handsome and wearing a suit that looked like it was made just for him. He had the darkest eyes you’d ever seen and he was breathtaking. You were pretty sure you’d remember a face like this. A deep frown creased his brows then as he tilted his head.

“Billy… Billy Russo?” he phrased it like a question but you shook your head, it still not ringing a bell.

“Nope, sorry,” you shrugged apologetically. You didn’t think his frown could get any deeper but you’d been wrong and he blinked rapidly, glancing around before his eyes settled back on you.

“I can’t tell if you’re fuckin’ with me or not. You don’t remember me? From two years ago? I sold my soul to you and then you let me go. I went back to your place a few days later to ask why you did it but you weren't there,” he muttered, sounding a little annoyed.

“You.. sold your soul to me?” you asked warily, taking a step backwards without thinking. Of course, the handsome one had to be a little crazy, you weren’t surprised. It didn’t negate the fact he had known your name though and it was mildly unsettling. He was giving you a weird look you couldn't quite place and you wrapped your arms around yourself feeling more than uncomfortable at the exchange.

“Look, Mr… I don’t know you and maybe you need to see a professional or something but I need to go. I’m late for work,” you insisted, giving him a wary look before you moved around him and started to walk hurriedly down the street. You found your eyes drifting over your shoulder, unable to help yourself like a magnet was drawing you. The man, Billy, was already looking at you, standing in the middle of the sidewalk as people walked around him. He looked a mix of confused and sad as he stared at you and something itched in the back of your brain that you couldn't place. You blinked quickly before turning back the right way, not wanting to bump into anyone else. You really needed to get your ass to work, the library books wouldn’t sort themselves.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

#billy russo imagine #billy russo fanfic #billy russo x reader #billy russo

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babytowntm · 2 years ago

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Time for an update !

Hey dear strangers I finally got another update to talk about. It has been done I am now a member of a drivers license course and I'll be having my first lesson this coming thursday at half past six until eight pm. I am very excidet!! The registration was very fast and easy and ithe people were very nice. They already gave me my login information for their app as well so I've been studying quite a bit ^^ I did a test recently and from 140 questions, I only got 6 wrong.

Aside from that I've been catching up on some uni work and I am almost finished with another course. So I'm doing great there as well!

On some other news though, work has been exhausting!! Between the end of march and easter coming around, I've been sick for two weeks and it really showed when I went back to work. Since my employer and I are the only people working, a lot of stuff has piled up that we both are struggling to keep up with. It's like christmas season all over again! Plus, a lot of companies have been calling us and wanting to know when their orders are gonna be ready (despite them only bringing in said order maybe three days prior).

It's been a bit lonely if I'm honest, considering we ALL work . We've really been drifting apart and I dont know why. I've tried so hard to connect and be there, always on time for discord calls, initiating contact with them but it all fails. They either say they do not have the time or just don't answer and don*t shop up to any calls. But it's been weird cause they also invite me to their birthdays? But then again they could be doing that out of pure boredom or just because they dont wanna make it awkward.

But then again I am no better. I basically blocked a good friend of mine because our views and morals don't align but I don't have the balls to say that to him. Maybe it is because I've lost respect for him or because he lives pretty far away and I only see him a few times a year. Idk.

My mind has been pretty jumbled lately when it comes to friendships in general. On one hand a friend of my boyfriend's basically told me deep secret about him and within the span of a month I've come to find him more annoying than ever. I don*t know why. I feel bad because I cannot actually pin point on why he annoys me. Maybe it is the fact that he carelessly tosses my time and efforts around like they do not mean anything to him, or the fact that he always has something to say and always an opinion to give on anything even when no one asked. But whatever it may be he has been getting on my nerves more and more.

#diary #diary entry #creative writing #author #journal #journaling #online diary

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a-republican-mind · 2 years ago

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I've been being accused of some things lately and would like to clear my name...

IDK what to do with myself here. I can’t really explain myself well after all of that scandal, and if I try to explain to someone here, they block me. I feel like it’s best to leave but at same time, to stay. Leave because all of what I build for five years, is destroyed, I’m hated, I’m sent anon hate. Stay because this is only place that I can talk to people, and I don’t have anyone to reach out. And look at me now, I’m more lonely than ever due to that mentally ill, man hating radfem Christian chick obsessed with me for some reason, I didn’t piss her off nor have I mocked her in any way before all of this. I don’t know what else she has posted about me and yes, I did contact the first person who knew about this via another account but at that time, I was scared the world was about to end and wasn’t really thinking but just to clear my name. And for those that say I baited my attempt to take my life, I had a knife with me until I cried to sleep. I know I fucked up big time.

But the other thing that I got blocked for sure was that “like” to that post, which again, I’ll say again, IT WASN’T FUCKING ME!!!!! Sure, likely story, dumbass. I am not creating this story, this legit happened. It wasn’t me but a friend of mine who (by stupidity of me not closing my laptop and leaving it on the settings page with the list of blocked people) was taking care of my stuff while I going to the restroom and decided it was good idea to run my blog. He has a tumblr: weepingcloddreamland, look him up and good luck trying to contact him as his last post was back in March of 2020. All of this happened on summer of 2018/2019, before the virus. I was out while he rebloged and give likes to those blogs I blocked for the right reasons. When I came back, he said, “Hey Michael, I spiced up your blog a bit” “Oh, really” *checked what he did* Shocked I said “Dude, WTF did you do, I blocked them for a reason!” his answer was... “I did a favor, you know women love that” After that, I decided to kick him his ass and cut ties, he left angry. Shortly thereafter, he created a blog to do what I did, blocked him back and said this.

As proof that I did talk to him, because no one believes me at this point. All of this happened before I had my porn addiction. My porn addiction started in 2020, and it went downhill from there. I know I have a problem. It will take a lot of time as I know that this isn’t solved overnight or in a week time. I deleted the blogs already (for those anons who keep on asking).

For those that blocked me for this, I just want to say sorry for all. I’m a horrible person who was caught in all of this. And is shameful of everything, I’m even disgusted at myself. All of this stuff that my addiction caught me in was fantasy and I’ve never once disrespected a woman in my life. I don’t support violence against women. Nor have I ever abused any woman in my life. You people act like if I actually did and I dare anyone to find anything in my record (nothing in there) I hope to regain your trust as I did when you first followed me, but I still highly doubt any of you want to hear from me again or forgive. But I am praying for all of your wellbeing every night before I go to bed. If you’re having personal problems, I’ll be praying for you. That’s how much I love you guys even if you hate me now. I hope that whatever hopes, dreams, goals, you (my former mutuals) have is completed or happens the way you want it. If you want to believe what I said, that’s up to you and I know that I’ll get even more hate and death threats may even lose more of you. But I want to tell the truth and my side of the story. I will change for the better, but I can’t do it alone. I still have those sick feeling of relapsing again but I’m holding tight not to.

Oh, and one final thing, please unfollow and block nette and her nasty man hating friends. I’ve heard many things from a couple of people about her that isn’t really good. One of her friends is racist, a couple of them are creeps (actual online stalkers) and saved pics of me when I posted them on my blog. Even one of them is proudly an ableist. And all for what? To save the day? To feel better with themselves? To get money out of me? Keep in mind that I’m dirt poor (have no money in the bank for months and struggle to get some money to buy at something worth five dollars at Wendy’s or Burger King for example), didn’t have a vacation since January of 2019, don’t have a central A/C system in my house and had a very hard life (economically speaking all the way since the beginning of 2016). Most of you consider yourself lucky that you can travel on a plane to Disneyland, Europe or whatever part of this fucking planet that I’ve never been on yet. Plus, after all of that, the bad luck still continued, I lost two cute cats, and my phone (which was going to be replaced anyways but I didn’t expect it so soon, it almost made my family go broke). This is all harassment and self-gratification just for a few likes. I have unblocked a couple of people that have blocked me in case you have the goodliness of your hearts to forgive me (still highly doubt it). But I won’t trust them again until otherwise. I’ll be removing anon tho. I don’t know what else what said about me other than the two posts about me, but I don’t think that stopped. Plus I believe in the “eye for an eye” punishment, so nette and co watch out and stop having those only idea of God. Get off the internet and read the bible. I just want this drama down and over with and to have my good friends back, but I still doubt they will want me back. For sure, some of them will see this tho. I’ve said enough.

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diabolikpersonals · 2 years ago

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Yuma with bad memory issues is so good (for us not for him), it gives us a lot of angst bit also a lot of comfort. For example:

Yuma starting to forget a shit ton of things and getting so frustrated about it that he starts crying and throwing things but then the rest of the Mukami's come there all really worried about him, but personally, I like to think this frustrates him even further not because of having to be vurnerable in front of them, but because he can't remember their names either. Now the Mukami's have a sad and a really frustrated Yuma to deal with but we all know hugs make everything better (right?) so Azusa just runs to him and hugs him:D After a few seconds the others join them and now it's a big comforting Mukami cuddle pile (Yay). And maybe after this they might get a lil bit more protective over Yuma than they were before, because if anyone want's to mess with their brother when he can barely remember his own name, they will have hell to pay>:(. Idk what is it about this but Yuma getting comforted by his brothers is just the best thing ever.

Also a scenario like this but with Shu would be really good because we would get angst with that aswell (maybe even a bit more?), since I think it would hurt Shu a lot more when Yuma forget's his name, to him it could start feeling like he's losing Yuma again. Which is sad but also gives us those nice moments of Shu really doing his best to make him feel better (of course he always tries his best when Yuma is involved but now he also strongly show's it) which would really make Yuma feel better and if the Mukami's were close by it could also show them that Shu actually isn't all lazy and he really does treat Yuma well (maybe this could even built up the trust between the Mukami's and Shu a bit?)

aghhh anon it's such a sweet spot for me!! I love this topic so much, everything in this ask is soooo <3

it's gotta be really stressful, yknow?? I imagine yuma being continuously asked "do you know who I am?" and he starts getting defensive, like he's being tested with every conversation he has, and if he answers incorrectly then the other person might be upset with him. I feel like he'd get sick and tired of it, and maybe even lash out and avoid people so he won't be in these situations anymore. but no regular contact with people he knows = he's more likely to forget them. a vicious cycle!! :'0 but imagining he and the mukamis working this out together is so wonderful to me. I never get tired of it. (I should publish some stuff about it sometime gsdhsfh)

I TOTALLY agree with what u said about shu doing his best to make him feel better!! this is a really complicated thing for shu. on one hand, he might think that yuma would be better off if he completely forgot about him (because he's shu, and he loves torturing himself like this lol). but this is something about shu that always touches my heart: no matter how much he tries to cut himself off from yuma, if he sees yuma suffering, he can't resist going back to help him. plus, yknow, I think shu tends to be overly-considerate of yuma—in canon this is something yuma doesnt like, but in this scenario it might work out. I'd love it if, while yuma is acting tough with everyone else, he felt like he could relax around shu a little more and accept his help. (is that wishful thinking? maybe, but I like it....!!)

#text #shuuma #(it's shuuma enough lol)

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kidkintsugi · 1 year ago

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Its getting bad again.

longer post because a lot happened.

If it wouldnt have been for my parents, I wouldve been homeless. The apartment I was supposed to move into with two of my friends couldnt be cleared as we were promised, which meant that we all had to find new apartments within the span of only 3 weeks. I was sick throughout all of summer because of the stress, i felt like shit. Still do. I have a new apartment now, but its so much more expensive than the old one. My parents are spending way too much money on me, downright making me uncomfortable. Im never gonna be able to repay this. its so frustrating but they dont listen to me when i tell them that i dont want more. im never gonna be able to repay this. i cant habe a side job it will kill me.

I come home daily with headaches. I wake up with headaches. my classmates are so annoying and loud and act like theyre the hottest shit when they cant even do the basics. instead of getting punished, the tutors stay lenient, instead punishing the ones that actually try by giving them more work. I feel overwhelmed. Im gonna be talking to a doctor next week, but theyre probably gonna tell me my headaches are due to stress. theyre probably right, but that also means im gonna have to live like this for the rest of my life. this will not get better i fear.

the friend i made i occasionally talk about is breaking my heart. hes been asking to use my washing machine, only that. i agreed, the night before he cancelled our meetup because he had agreed to meet with someone else way earlier, he just forgot. hes been letting me hang a lot ever since we met. he never lets anyone else down because of me, im always on the receiving end. its always me he leaves behind. hes been crushing on this other guy. it feels like hes ignoring me almost completely now, still only asking to use my washing machine. he wouldve come over this weekend to wash his clothes but i told him he couldnt come because my parents would come, but he could come around in the following week. He declined again: he needed clean clothes asap. this wasnt about getting to meet me, he just wanted to use me again. he was gonna clean his clothes, help himself by emptying my snack cabinet and leave without cleaning up after himself. I feel so used. my heart hurts. I always end up like this.

I miss my old friends. I love them. they never treated me like this. we helped eachother we trusted eachother. i am so angry. I miss them so much but i dont have the energy to stay in contact with them right now. everythings too much.

im in so much pain emotionally. my chest is tight all the time. i feel dizzy. i dont want to wake up anymore. its simply gotten too much, idk how much longer ill be on this earth.

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sameteeth · 3 years ago

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mm casual transphobia from people i want to befriend .. lovely

#every time i try to be normal it doesnt work #i hate it here <3 i just want to have a good time #when he asks ur pronouns but his friends make fun of trans ppl #i am feeling sick now and idk if i want to contact him ever again #i was getting weird vibes but i wasnt sure if that was the trauma or genuine bad vibes... i want to give him a second chance bc hes never #personally been transphobic or anything but also ? ive given plenty of ppl second chancrs and they waste em. idk im just pathetic and enjoy #cute boys giving me attention. hes probably just here to stare at my chest and have me listen to his stories. idk im cramping and upset :(#kinda want to text him and be like 'oh so ur friends w transphobes? u can ask my pronouns but if i had scruff and wore a binder u wouldnt #give me the time of day? ur one of those assholes? really?' but i dont want to be accusatory or anything #idk theres too many people who are surface progressive and clearly havent challenged their internal biases and it shows <3 #whug im too tired for a crisis like this. maybe ill just be an obnoxious tranny so his friend either complains or shuts tf up abt it #canis vents #t slur in tags #ask to tag #transphobia

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pizzapizzadickz · 2 years ago

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...

#diary #personal #i dont rly know how to trigger warn this or if it necessary so youve been warned.#its really hard sometimes when you really want to be friends with someone and they just dont with you.#like. my dreams just keep on reminding so i never really forget. and it sucks.#because. i really did to be close with him. desprately. and it sucks. bc. in the end its not like i was someone he cared about...#haaah. yknow. i want to just. impulsivly completely change my a social media of mine i used with friends n make it worrisome.#...maybe then i could talk to them again. haha. ha.#it was one community i rly didnt wanna let go of. tbh. i was in my own way trying my best.#even tho i was falling apart. even tho i still am really.#haah. even now i can tell i was never the priority. and honestly i dont think i ever am.#haha. i wanna go on a depressive spiral and self destruct.#im. really sick of this so fucking much. haaah. i still might change that one social of mine. im not good at controlling impulses #idk man. i was trying to sleep a bit more. but everything is out of wack now and i hate everything n wanna die.#suicidal ideation #honestly. he just keeps appearing in my dreams and it sucks bc im usually fine without it but sometimes im just so lonely.#sometimes i just think i want someone to fall down with me. to take them with me. idk. i really dont #im so tired. i was having a really good day yesterday and now im not and i feel like im falling apart.#im really not a good person. and i think maybe im just writting this all to show that.#idk if ill post this or delete it or what. im so so so tired. bc i keep thinking. but what if somehow he sees this and contacts me.#he wont. idk if he even cares. he blocked everyone afterall. at most im a memory he sometimes thinks of b4 dismissing.#im tired. really tired. haah. i wish my friendship would just sometimes go the way i want. im always left behind.#why do i care the most about people who hardly care about me. i wish i could read social cues more easily. i wish i hadnt done that.#sometimes i really wish i wasnt me. just anyone but. then i wouldnt be an asshole. then ppl will stay.#maybe then i could just understand everything better as to why. but i dont. so ppl just leave #and im left here wondering why. its really lonely sometimes. and its not like i hate my current friend or dont care or something #its just. its not the same. heck ive even missed my abusive/toxic relationships before. i just wish things could remain the same.#im sorry......#i think ill get up now. its 5:30 but idk if i can sleep. idk what to do really. im tired #and im trying not to fall into my self destructive tendencies. nonetheless it was a nice peaceful dream. just. i miss them all. i miss then

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cybersvoid · 3 years ago

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❥ Game Over

✏ Pairings: Shigaraki x Reader

♡ Summary: Just a normal day of you cock warming Shiggy while he games, turning into you riding him so he doesn’t punish you. idk man I just work here.

!!Warnings!!: [18+ NSFW] Spanking, Choking, Cursing, Cock Warming, Dubcon, Threats, etc.

“Stop squirming!” Shigaraki shouted, “if you make me lose this level I’m going to fuck you senseless so hold fucking still.”

It was easier said than done. You kept feeling his cock twitching inside of you as he played on his PC. Every now and again, when he was on a particularly stressful level, he would lean forward ever so slightly, hitting just a little deeper within you and catching you off guard.

You don’t know when this habit of his started, all you remember was that he wanted you to sit on his lap while he played. Your chest on his, as he faced the screen. But the feeling of your breasts pushed against him, and your pretty little cunt over his dick (clothed or not) always ended up turning him on. So you eventually just ended up on the floor getting fucked, his game long forgotten. Maybe trying to save a few steps is where the idea came from. Playing his game while inside of you helped with his horniness and his gaming addiction at the same time.

“Unless…” Shigaraki whispered, his hot breath fanning your ear causing goosebumps to coat your skin “You’re trying to get me to fuck you.”

You frantically shook your head. Shigaraki was rarely ever gentle when he fucked you. Treating you more like a toy rather than a human being. It was pain mixed with pleasure in a way you couldn’t describe. But no matter how rough he was, he always had a way of making you cum regardless.

“I’m a nice enough Master. Since you want my dick so bad… bounce,” Shigaraki commanded.

“W-wha-?” Shigaraki’s gloved hand came off the mouse and wrapped around your throat, slamming your back into his desk and causing his monitors to rattle. It wasn’t a lot of force, just enough to scare you, and goddamn did it work. Your eyes started watering as he tightened his grip on you, cutting off your oxygen before he began speaking again.

“I said fucking bounce. If you don’t make me cum by the time I finish this level, I’m going to fuck you until you can’t so much walk for a week. Understand?”

You frantically nodded your head as he released his grip on your neck. Panting slightly from the lack of air as well as fear clouding your brain. You straightened yourself out a bit, hands holding onto his shoulders as you found a way to steady yourself without blocking his view of the screen. You know if you got in the way while he played then he would punish you regardless, and you really didn’t want that.

“Hurry up!” Shigaraki huffed, annoyed at how long it was taking to steady yourself, he smacked your ass as a warning. Causing you to leap forward with a screech, your pussy gripping him at the surprise contact brought onto your skin.

“Ohh? Did you like that?” Shigaraki hummed, “Your such a slut, you’re really getting off on someone hitting you? What the fuck is wrong with you? And people think I’m sick.” You felt ashamed at his words. You really couldn’t help it though your body just reacted. You didn’t mean for it to happen, you were just surprised. “I’m not very patient, but I am incredible at this game, so I would hurry up if I were you.”

You quickly got to work grinding and bouncing on his dick as fast as your body would let you. Every now and again, Shigaraki would smack your ass, warning you of what’s to come if you don’t get him to finish in time. You were growing more desperate by the second. But at the same time, you couldn’t go any faster. The feeling of him entering you, again and again, was overwhelming.

His dick was so long, hitting a spot deep within you that your fingers could never even come close to reaching. Each time you made his dick slam into that spot, you felt your orgasm grow little by little, your walls becoming slicker and coating his dick in the process. Your legs were shaking, muscles barely even able to hold yourself upright at the feeling of your peak fast approaching. The sound of your moans, mixed with your cunt squelching, and your skin slapping together was so loud it muffled the noise of his game so you could only hear the dirty sounds coming from the two of you.

You felt the build-up. You were close. So close. Shigaraki’s hand slapping down on your ass sending you into a spiral as you came right on his dick. Pussy gripping around him so tight he clenched his jaw, groaning a bit as he let out a deep breath. You rested for a second, only a second as you tried to come down from your high before you started again. Knowing the feeling of him hitting that spot within you after you just came would be too much for you to handle. But he didn’t even give you that before he slammed himself into you.

You cried out as your body flew into the air. The only thing keeping you from losing your balance was Shigarakis body pressing you into the desk.

“Who the fuck do you think you are coming before me?” He scolded, handing coming down on your ass with even more force than before. “You’re a whore.” Smack! “A stupid whore!” Smack! “My dick feel that good?” Smack! “So good you just couldn’t wait before soaking me in your fucking cum?!” Smack!

You were wailing with each hit but he didn’t even care. Yelling at you to keep going before giving you one final hit. You couldn’t afford to waste another second, moving your hips and riding his dick no matter how overstimulating it was. God, he was big, making you whine every time you came down, your throbbing clit smacking against him.

“Mmm, faster.” He commanded, breathing becoming erratic, and you obeyed, eager to please him and get this over with. You bounced on his dick quicker and quicker, gripping onto his shoulders for support as your head flew back, moaning his name.

“Shigaraki, it’s too much.” You whined you “Please. Please just-”

“That’s right beg me for it. Beg me to cum inside your hole. Fill you up with every part of me. Beg!”

It was so humiliating, but you had no choice but to listen, knowing better than to disobey him when he’s all hot and bothered like this. “Please, Shigaraki. Please fill me up with your cum. I want it. I want it so bad.”

“Fuck!” He called out before gripping your hips and slamming you onto his dick, releasing his load deep inside you. Pump after pump, of hot cum pouring out of him and filling you up past your limit. It left you twitching as you relaxed into his body feeling completely exhausted.

His hand came up to your head, stroking you as he came down from his high. “You did well. Took my dick like a real champ.” He spoke, dick still twitching inside you.

Thank god it was over. Now you could jus-

“If only you were faster though.” He added, causing your eyes to widen as realization began sinking in. No, no, no. There was no way. Your head turned, facing the screen to see big bold letters reading ‘Game Over’.

How long? How long had it been like this?

“Buckle up,” He whispered, “We’re just getting started. Someone’s in for a long night.”

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because-of-a-friend · 3 years ago

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Enemies to Lovers!Jeonghan

MASTERLIST

One day I will come up with titles for my works lol.

Hi Hannah!!!! Thanks for requesting! I loved doing this one! I went ahead and went with Jeonghan cuz I feel like he fits this trope best! Sorry you had to wait so long, this particular fic got deleted like... three times so it was a struggle lol. I hope it’s what you were looking for!

I hope this is a good one, I’m realizing I get real insecure about my writing anytime I’m not doing a bulletpoint or reaction fic, so I don’t feel great about this time. Also I only started recently putting actual detail into my kiss scenes and idk how I’m doing with those???? Like do they seem ok??? Also I feel like I make it so obvious that I am such a sucker for SVT having cute nicknames for siblings, friends, partners, etc in fics lol. Anyways...

Also, I really said: Jeonghan... but in different types of lighting

Remember I don’t own the gif! Link to OP is right there if you want to go give the creator some love!!!

Word Count: 5.2k

Warnings: Mentions eating, reader is using female pronouns (I will keep things gn unless you request differently), I think that’s it, pls let me know if I missed any

You’re not sure exactly how it happened. It was probably just an instance of getting off on the wrong foot, that led to more awkward interactions, giving both of you the wrong impression of each other. You knew this, you could rationalize it all. You were well aware that all it would take was one “I think we might have the wrong idea of each other” conversation and it would all be over. You could easily fix it all, but…

But his stupid smug face. The sarcastic jokes. The never-ending pranks that were not as funny as he thought they were. His ridiculous arrogance. His overall unapologetic nature towards all of it.

You couldn’t help but hate Yoon Jeonghan.

*****

“I don’t know, Wonnie…” you say uneasily over the phone. In previous years, you’d go over to the dorm without hesitation. You loved spending time with your brother and many of the other boys. But ever since you had officially met and begun interacting with Jeonghan…

“C’mon, [Y/N]! I bought that new game you were talking about! We can play it together on my gaming system!” Wonwoo began to persuade. You knew you’d give in; you always did. Your brother was far too sweet a person and far too comforting a presence to reject. The question was how long did you want to argue with him about going to the dorm.

You sighed, accepting defeat early to save time, “I’ll head over there in a bit.”

Wonwoo gives a small cry of victory, “Ok, I’ll have Gyu make extra ramen.” Wonwoo abruptly hangs up the phone right after, leaving you in silence to groan in regret of your decision.

You immediately straighten yourself out, though, trying to put yourself in a mindset of determination. What were you thinking? Just because you and that asshole didn’t get along meant you couldn’t go see your own twin brother without feeling uncomfortable? Screw that! If he wanted to keep the peace then he was going to have to start watching where he stepped around you.

*****

You knocked loud and clear on the door of their dorm, knowing that with thirteen people living inside, it was usually too noisy for them to hear someone signal their arrival. To your relief, Seungcheol opened the door just moments after you knocked and greeted you with a warm smile followed by a hand sneaking into your hair to ruffle it, “Hey there, kiddo! How’s it hanging?”

“Just fine,” you tilt your head down slightly in his direction as you pass him to enter the dorm. “How are things here?” As soon as you ask, your ears are met with the noise of someone dropping something in the kitchen, followed by Seungkwan crying in alarm.

“Same as always, I supposed,” Seungcheol sighs, but his smile doesn’t fade. “I think Mingyu and Wonwoo are already in the computer room, if you want to go ahead and see them!”

“Ok, thanks Cheol!” you call as you both rush off in different directions, him towards the kitchen and you towards the small room that would provide you solace from the possibility of having to see Yoon Jeonghan.

You were determined not to let things go how they usually did: you with your mouth clamped shut as Jeonghan spoke whatever teasing words he had saved up for you, and the most you can do to fight back is by rolling your eyes and finding any way to get away from him.

This time, you would still avoid contact with him, but if it happened, you’d speak your mind and not care what he thought, since that’s how he treated you.

But there was no sign of him or anyone else as you walked to the computer room. You could hear Mingyu and Wonwoo yelling and cheering at the game long before you opened the door. It was pitch black inside, the piercing light of the screen making you squint your eyes.

The two men inside both turn immediately to check who offended their dark space with the soft, yellow light from the hallway.

“Oh [Y/N], you came!” Mingyu beams up at you. You nod, matching his bright expression.

“How’s the game?” you ask simply, looking up to your brother.

“We like it so far,” Wonwoo’s smile is wide, he always gets excited about new games, whether they’re good or not. He leans over to grab a can of some sort of energy drink before gulping it down. “We left some ramen for you over there on the table. Eat first, then I’ll let you have a turn.”

You roll your eyes, though Wonwoo was only mere minutes older than you, he found those moments to be enough leverage to order you around and act like you should be dependent on his care. There were times when he even referred to himself as “oppa” to you and insisted that you do the same.

Most of the time you let it slide, especially when you weren’t in the mood to argue. However, there were times when you’d pull out the “We’re the same age,” “Even if you’re older, I’m smarter,” or “Don’t boss me around when I’m more mature than you” cards at the drop of a hat.

“Can you at least turn on the LEDs while I eat?” you ask, tip-toeing in the darkness towards the table at the back end of the room. You hear a click before a soft blue glow fills the room, finally giving you a clear view of your path. You pull the bowl of ramen towards you as you sit and resist the urge to comment on how little they left you. The dorm was filled with food anyways, you could find more later if you got hungry again.

Wonwoo and Mingyu begin to eagerly tell you what they like about the game as you eat. You listen happily, feeling safe in the presence of your brother and friend.

Then of course…

“Hey you two, Cheol wanted me to remind you that we have to get up early tomorrow,” you can’t help the sour expression that comes over your face as Jeonghan enters the room to speak to Wonwoo and Mingyu. “Oh, hey there cutie, I didn’t know you were here!” His smirk makes you sick.

“Don’t call me that,” you say bitterly into the nearly empty bowl.

Wonwoo looks nervously between you and his bandmate, well aware of the dislike you have for him. He’s grateful that you’ve always kept it so civil, but still feels bothered by the unrest between you.

Jeonghan lets out a little giggle in response, and Wonwoo feels a tug in the pit of his stomach, he wishes Jeonghan wouldn’t be so hard on you sometimes. He knows his hyung doesn’t mean anything by it, but you…

You feel your heart sink as Jeonghan steps fully into the room, striding to sit across from you at the table. You can only stare in wonder at his audacity as he slides the bowl towards himself and finishes off the ramen in one bite.

“I was eating that,” you try to keep your tone measured, attempting to keep within the balance of standing up for yourself but not starting any drama that would affect the boys.

“Go make more if you’re hungry, then,” Jeonghan says casually, making your anger positively flare.

You don’t even give your brother the chance to mediate, jumping up from your place and leaving the room, wanting to be anywhere but around that prick.

*****

“You’re leaving already?” Mingyu pouts at you.

“Gyu, I’ve been here for hours,” you laugh, stretching out your fingers as they start to prick from pain of slamming into a keyboard for so long. You had returned to the computer room but only after Jeonghan left. Part of you had wished you had done more to confront him; another part was glad you didn’t start a fight and put Wonwoo in an awkward position. “Besides all of you, as well as me have to get up early tomorrow, it’s already late. I need to get back home.”

“You can stay here,” Wonwoo was quick to offer.

You shook your head at him, “Then I’ll just have to get up even earlier, I’ll go back to my place.” Wonwoo nods almost reluctantly, standing to walk you out.

All of you run into Joshua on your way to the front door, he turns out to be the only one smart enough to ask how you got there.

“Oh, I took the bus,” you say slowly, knowing this is about to cause issues.

“Well, the last one would have already stopped running by now,” Mingyu says looking at the time on his phone.

“I’ll give you a ride,” Josh offers immediately.

You bring your hands up to shake them back and forth, “No, no, I can find a way home, you all need to go to bed.”

“[Y/N],” Wonwoo speaks up immediately in that stern voice you hate but also can’t help but listen to, “let Josh take you home. It’s either that or you stay here, I won’t have you walking around alone at night.” Wonwoo waits a moment to gauge your expression. He finally nods affirmatively, before speaking directly to Joshua, “Take her home, please.”

Joshua nods before walking off to grab his keys. You and Wonwoo send Mingyu off to bed. Once you’re alone, your brother pulls you in for a tight hug. “Do you want me to say something to him?” he asks lowly.

You shake your head, “I don’t want to cause any problems with you guys.” You sit in silence for a moment. “Come and stay over with me sometime, I miss our sleepovers.”

Joshua comes back and Wonwoo pulls away, “Thanks, hyung. Please get her home safe.” For the second time that night, your hair gets ruffled before your brother disappears to go off to bed.

The ride home with Joshua is comfortable. He speaks kindly to you and makes you smile.

You begin to wonder how amongst all these angels, there exists a person like Yoon Jeonghan.

*****

Wonwoo used the new game as leverage to guilt you into coming over quite often in the following weeks. You hadn’t realized how much you had limited your time at the dorm until you started going consistently once more. It was nice being able to spend time with the boys again. You hated that Jeonghan had become such an unbearable presence that it affected your relationship with the rest of your friends.

But ever since you had started to stand your ground and talk back, he had finally begun to avoid you. You supposed it was only fun for him when you sat there and took it.

It didn’t stop the two of you from bickering when you saw each other, but now both of you preferred to avoid each other instead of Jeonghan seeking you out to tease you.

The following weeks of visiting were fairly comfortable. Whenever Jeonghan wasn’t around, you got to spend plenty of time with the other boys and your brother. Plus, the new video game was even better than expected.

Jeonghan’s presence slowly became uncomfortable in a different way.

Instead of being smug and overbearing, he became strangely quiet around you. His facial expressions became more serious as he sent genuine glares your way before letting out bitter remarks and going on his way.

It made you even angrier.

Who the hell was he to torture you all this time and then act like a kicked puppy when you finally fought back???

Your anger and his bitterness slowly escalated the tension between you two. Although they were happening less frequently, the arguments between you became more serious and almost hurtful.

Whatever, you told yourself, he could do as he pleased, you wouldn’t let it affect you anymore.

*****

You stared down at your phone screen. Why? Why did it have to be here, while you were at the dorm?

The call was only five minutes. They didn’t even do it in person. Of course, they had warned that because of hard times, there’d be lay-offs soon. But they couldn’t even do it in person? And all you got was a simple “Sorry, come collect your things on Monday”??? You were a hard worker, passionate about the job, more efficient than most of your coworkers and this is how they treated you???

A part of you could’ve guessed, many of the employees your age had gotten in because of nepotism. But you didn’t want to believe that they’d just brush off all your years of hard work just to avoid stepping on the toes of higher-ups who had relative connections hired at the company.

You squatted against the wall of the hallway, still too in shock to move.

So, you simply sat in silence, for what seemed like forever.

“You good?” you had never felt worse than the exact moment his voice reached your ears.

“Go away,” you said sternly, knowing you’d be crying soon.

“Geez, forgive me for asking,” Jeonghan responds before turning to walk away. He stops abruptly after you sniffle. “So, you’re not ok?”

“No offense, Jeonghan,” you say hating the way your voice is shaking, “but you are the last person I want to speak to right now.”

There’s a heavy silence for a long moment. You silently pray that he’ll just leave. “Do you want me to get your brother?” he asks lightly.

You shake your head, “No, I don’t want to ruin the mood. I’m going to go home, just tell him I had a stomach ache.” You push yourself up and begin to walk briskly towards the door.

To your surprise, Jeonghan reaches out to stop you. You stare at his hand wrapped around your arm and wonder if you’ve ever even allowed him to touch you before. “It’s already late, let me give you a ride.”

You pull his hand off of you, “No, thanks.” You grab your coat and start to dig around in your purse to make sure you have all of your belongings.

“[Y/N],” Jeonghan’s voice rings clear in your head despite your brain feeling fuzzy. You don’t want to look at him. Who is this person that’s showing concern and speaking kindly? You don’t like it. It feels fake. It feels like a predator playing with a wounded prey. You’re just waiting for him to laugh or make a remark or do anything to make you feel worse than you already do.

But Jeonghan simply grabs the keys laying on the front table, grabs your arm once more, and leads you out to the car.

*****

The ride is suffocatingly silent. You wished he’d at least turn on some music to cover up the sound of your crying, but you remained in the quiet. You rolled down your window and stuck your head out, letting the warm night air and sound of wind comfort you. Since you were turned away from him completely, you didn’t see Jeonghan glancing over at you throughout the drive.

You couldn’t have left that car faster when you finally pulled up to your apartment.

To your dismay, Jeonghan also gets out, apparently intent on walking you up.

“You don’t have to-” you start but abruptly stop when he gives you a look telling you an emotion you don’t quite understand.

Jeonghan finally speaks when you’re riding the elevator up to your floor, “I don’t really mean it, you know.”

“Mean what?” you say weakly, starting to feel the exhaustion from crying so much.

“When I talk to you like that… I mean when I’m… rude,” he trails off, running a hand through his hair. “Usually it’s just teasing, but obviously I went too far with you. And I didn’t realize it until you started showing how upsetting it was for you. I should’ve known before that, though.”

“You seemed ruder after I started talking back,” you say, confused.

“I was just being petty and defensive. I kept telling myself things like: It’s her fault, isn’t it? She should have made it more clear from the beginning that it was upsetting her. How was I supposed to know? But that was just me being immature, I should’ve just talked to you.”

“Is that an… apology, Yoon Jeonghan?” you ask, letting yourself be a little smug.

For the first time, you get a genuine smile out of him, “Maybe.”

There’s more silence for a second.

“It’s a two-way road, though,” you say finally.

“What do you mean?” he asks.

“I mean, I could have also come and talked to you instead of letting things escalate,” you say. “I played some part in all of this… unpleasantness. You can’t entirely blame yourself.”

Jeonghan smiles again, reaching out to ruffle your hair the way Seungcheol always did. Then he takes a dramatic deep breath and rolls his shoulders, “There! That feels better, doesn’t it? We can finally be friends!”

You roll your eyes in a playful manner, but you feel it too, a weight has been lifted.

*****

Wonwoo showed up at your door in the middle of the night that night. You took one look at his frantic face and groaned, “I told Jeonghan I would tell you myself.”

“You should have told me immediately!” your brother pouts as he passes you to walk into your apartment.

“I didn’t want to worry you so late, especially when all of you were having a good time. I was going to tell you tomorrow,” you close the door behind him. You watch as he turns on the TV and starts picking through your pantry. “Hmmm, yes it seems quite clear that you came here out of concern for me,” you can’t help but use a sarcastic tone.

Wonwoo sends a glare your way as he grabs snacks and settles on the couch. You sit next to him, grabbing your fair share of the food. You try to keep your attention on the show, but the feeling of Wonwoo staring straight at you is distracting.

“I’m fine, you don’t have to worry,” you sigh.

“Really? Because Jeonghan described you as an emotional wreck,” your brother scoffs.

“I was just shocked and upset. I’ll be ok. I have a good resume, I can find a new job,” you insist.

“I keep telling you, you don’t have to work-”

“I don’t care how much you make,” you interrupt. “I’m not going to depend on you. It’ll just make trouble for both of us.”

“Will you at least let me help out if there’s any problems before you find a new job?” Wonwoo kicks at your leg.

“Like I would even tell you if I was having trouble,” you return his kick.

“You just can’t help but be difficult,” your brother complains quietly.

You let the sound of the show take over the room for a few minutes. “I do have good news,” you finally speak up, wanting to give your brother some peace of mind about something. “Me and Jeonghan made up. We figured it out.”

Wonwoo bolts upright with a grin on his face, “Really??? It’s really all good now?”

“100%,” you say, unable to stop yourself from pinching your brother’s cheeks, finding his excited expression cute.

“Let’s celebrate soon then! We can have a big gaming party with all of the boys!” You agree to your brother’s proposal. You feel content in this moment, knowing you’ll wake up in the morning in an uncomfortable position, immediately kick at his legs and tell him to get his stinky feet away from you.

*****

Your time at the dorm increases with the weight of you and Jeonghan’s rivalry being gone. You’re enjoying getting to know him as a friend instead of constantly walking on eggshells around him. Going to visit the boys is once again a happy and comfortable experience.

You hadn’t realized how much Jeonghan had affected you until you two had worked things out. The world felt light again and you could breathe, no longer in constant worry of possibly ruining things between your brother and his bandmates.

You hoped things would remain without complications for a long time.

*****

“Seungkwan, you should come with us!” you begged. “The carnival only comes once a year; you can’t miss it!”

“But it’s so crowded and there are screaming kids everywhere,” Seungkwan complains.

“Oh, whatever,” Soonyoung interjects. “You love it every time we go.”

Seungkwan gives Soonyoung a look that has you laughing through your mouthful of ramen. “Oh, shoot,” you say feeling liquid start to dribble down your chin. “Can I get a napkin?”

“Here’s one,” you hear Jeonghan’s voice as he enters the room. You reach out to grab the napkin as Seungkwan and Soonyoung continue bickering. But instead of handing it to you, Jeonghan extends his hand not holding the napkin towards you. His fingers come to lightly touch your chin and turn you towards him. Jeonghan wipes your face with the napkin himself, taking the time to make sure it’s really all clean. “All better,” he smiles at you, running his thumb across your chin to check its cleanliness one last time.

As Jeonghan walks away, you turn to see if Seungkwan or Soonyoung saw what had happened. They were still arguing, though. The boys showing you physical touch or affection wasn’t really all that uncommon. But for some reason, the way Jeonghan had grabbed your chin just now… Why was your heart beating so hard?

*****

You couldn’t stop yourself from dragging Wonwoo all over the carnival. It was nice to get out in this environment, the lights, the laughter, the food, the games, the rides. You wanted to do everything, but not before you looked at all there was and took in the spectacle.

You could hear all the boys laughing excitedly behind you, you knew they’d want to try everything as well. You shook your head at Seungkwan’s bright expression, you couldn’t wait to play the ‘I told you so’ card later.

The night was a blur. All of you ran from games to rides to snacks and then all over again.

You couldn’t help but stop completely in your tracks as you passed a booth with a giant stuffie of your favorite animal as a prize. Your fascination with the plushie doesn’t go unnoticed.

“You want me to win it for you?” Jeonghan’s voice is suddenly speaking right into your ear. You jump after realizing he was right behind you. You grip your cotton candy a bit tighter and shyly nod. The way Jeonghan grins at you fills you with warmth.

You watch him walk over to the booth. His light hair and pink shirt were illuminated by the soft glow of the surrounding lights. Jeonghan takes his wallet out and hands some bills to the vendor. You step up closer to stand next to him as he plays the game. He laughs as he chats back and forth with the vendor. You watch in awe as Jeonghan clears the game, no problem.

“Anything from the top shelf!” the vendor exclaims happily.

“That one please,” Jeonghan points right at the stuffie you had been staring at.

“It’ll be a wonderful memory for your girlfriend,” the vendor smiles as he hands the prize directly to you.

“Oh, I’m-”

“Of course!” Jeonghan interrupts you almost instantly, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and starting to pull you away from the game. “We’ll cherish it for a long time! Thanks for the game!” The vendor waves kindly as you two walk away. After a moment, Jeonghan pulls his arm off of you, “Sorry, sometimes it’s just easier to agree than explain, you know?” You nod in agreement. “Wait a second,” he stops you by putting his hands on your shoulders and standing in front of you. Before you can ask what’s wrong, his hand comes up towards your face as it had earlier that day. He quickly swipes his thumb across your lips before pulling to back to show you remnants of your cotton candy. “Do you always eat this messily?” he grins and then, to your surprise, puts his thumb in his mouth to clean it off.

You stand there, frozen, unable to really comprehend what just happened as Jeonghan walks away towards the other boys.

“For the second time today?” Soonyoung is suddenly standing next to you.

“So you did see what happened earlier!” you exclaimed, hitting his arm lightly. “It was weird, right?!”

“Can’t tell yet,” Soonyoung replies cocking his head to the side and putting his hands in his pocket. “Sometimes Jeonghan is just sort of naturally flirtatious. But I’m not sure about you. I figured since you two didn’t get along at first, it’d take him awhile to warm up to you at that level. He seemed to get comfortable with you quite quickly.” Soonyoung turns and shrugs at you after his words.

“You’re no help at all,” you say emotionlessly. There’s a pause before both you and Soonyoung slowly look at each other and laugh at your quip.

You decide to brush off your new concerns about Jeonghan and enjoy this night with the boys. The vendor was right, it was a good memory, and you’re sure it’d last you for your whole lifetime.

*****

You hate yourself a bit for it, but you once again seem to be avoiding Jeonghan. He had made you so nervous that day, and the way your heart pounded… You didn’t want to get sucked into having a silly crush on him if he wasn’t actually trying to flirt with you.

No, from now on, interactions with Jeonghan would be friendly but short and appropriate.

You were stupid to think he wouldn’t notice.

It wasn’t long before there came a night when Jeonghan insisted that he be the one to give you a ride home. You couldn’t help the way your nerves spiked at his determination to be the one to take you. You knew he most likely wanted to talk to you about your sudden distance from him.

The ride itself was nice, Jeonghan rolled the windows down for you, remembering that you enjoyed the warm night air of summer. You talked comfortably with one another. Jeonghan was always able to make you smile so easily.

You couldn’t stop yourself from staring at him. He was just wearing a t-shirt and sweats but… His blonde hair being illuminated in the moonlight as he ran his hands through it and his bright smile as he laughed...

He really was beautiful.

Once again, Jeonghan came with you to walk you to your door. And once again, he finally spoke up in the elevator, “You’ve been avoiding me, sweetheart.” Your heart drops to your stomach at the nickname. “Is everything ok? Did I do something to make you mad again?”

You quickly shake your head and pull your hands up to shake them as well, “No! Not at all!”

“You sure?” he insists.

“Yoon Jeonghan, you really don’t think I’d tell you if you did?” you say.

He giggles, “Yeah, that’s true. You’d let me know the moment I messed up, wouldn’t you?” The elevator dings and opens up to your floor. You and Jeonghan step out together. “Is everything else ok, then? You don’t start avoiding people for no reason.”

You nod as casually as possible, “Everything is great.” Your tone isn’t convincing and Jeonghan nudges you. “I guess, I just got… nervous? I mean one moment we were like enemies and then the next we were suddenly really… close, and-”

“I made you uncomfortable?” Jeonghan’s voice is slightly panicked.

“No, you did nothing wrong! It’s all on me, I just got caught up in my emotions and-” you stop abruptly when you realize what you were about to do.

Jeonghan nods quietly as if to say he understands, but what it is he understands, you’re not sure. “Is it ok for us to remain close, or do you want me to back off?”

“I don’t want any more distance between us, but…” you trail off.

“But, what?” he prompts you again.

“I don’t want to get the wrong idea about anything…” you say, finally reaching your door.

Jeonghan watches as you slowly unlock your door and push it open, “You haven’t gotten the wrong idea about anything.” He avoids eye contact when you look up at him.

You’re shocked by his forwardness. But once he voices his thoughts out loud, you once again feel the feeling of a weight being lifted.

Jeonghan gestures for you to step inside, catching your arm once you fully pass him. He pulls you back to him, close enough for him to lean in and leave a quick kiss on your cheek, “Night, babe, I’ll see you later.”

You stand there, completely still, staring at your door that had shut closed in front of you. You can feel heat rise from the tip of your toes all the way up to your ears. You finally let yourself fall into a squatting position, covering your face with your hands, and letting out a squeal.

*****

Jeonghan invites you to meet up outside of the dorm. It’s a cute little coffee shop at a quiet part of the city. You’re already sitting when he walks in. Maybe one day, you won’t be completely caught off guard by his beauty… but today is not that day.

His whole person is bathed in the glow of the early morning light as he approaches you, the softest, most genuine smile gracing his face.

“No, don’t get up,” he says when you try to leave your chair, “I need to go off and order anyways.” Jeonghan leans down to kiss your forehead firmly. “I just wanted to come say hi first,” he whispers, holding your face close to his.

Your first date sets a wonderful precedent to the rest of your relationship. Jeonghan gets your heart racing with flirty comments and sweet touches. But he also makes you feel calm and content, easily keeping a smile on your face. You just feel… good throughout it all.

You insist on walking him back to the dorm, since they had schedules that day.

“So, we’ll be doing this again?” Jeonghan asks hopefully, as you reach the front door.

“Definitely,” you nod enthusiastically up at him, wondering how you had ever managed to despise the man that made you feel so whole and happy.

Jeonghan looks utterly happy and a tiny bit nervous as he stares down at you. His hand reaches up to brush back your hair before settling firmly against your face. Jeonghan looks at you so fondly as he leans in. His lips connect to yours… so softly… so sweetly. You can feel his nose nudge against your face to push it into a preferred position. He pulls back slightly after every little kiss to let out laughter so sweet, it sounds like it should be coming from the mouth of an angel. But he’s never far away for long, reconnecting to you quickly every time. You let him take the lead, allowing his lips to take care of yours, giving them the sweetest kind of attention. He pulls back for a moment longer to nuzzle his nose against yours, an action that has you gripping his shirt to keep him close. His hands keep themselves entertained by running across your face or through your hair.

He’s going back in to kiss you once again when he front door of the dorm opens, leaving you caught in the act. Wonwoo stares at you two for a long moment before making a single comment that causes you and Jeonghan to laugh.

“You know, when I said I wanted you two to have a better relationship, this isn’t exactly what I meant.”

520 notes · View notes

fruggo · 3 years ago

Note

Hello ! I saw the enemies fo lovers things and I wanna request if possible

“ rich coming from the guy who tried to kill me three days ago. “

With frank if you would and thank you

yessirrr i love frank sm it’s not ok. also umm i may have accidentally written friends to enemies to lovers or something idk. and though i wouldnt necessarily call you friends at the start, you werent really enemies yet???? idk🐸just ummm yeh i love frank

also help how do i not go overboard???? i feel like i made this way too long, please help and i am sorry

warnings: canon-typical violence, swearing, frank being a bastard but then you’re like awwww he’s a cute bastard aaaaw

Things were weird with Frank, and they always had been from the moment you stepped foot in the Entity’s realm. He always tunneled you relentlessly, and that made you think of him as a big asshole, but there were some strange details tacked onto the sentiment that greatly confused you, should you think about it for more than three seconds.

Sometimes, it seemed like he went easy on you in chases, like he put in no effort. He would chase you for a while, let you waste his time, and then leave without even getting a hit on you when he definitely had the ability to.

And you hated saying this, but when he handled you, it almost felt…gentle. Granted, he was a killer, and his job was to murder you, but your experiences with him did not quite line up with those of the other survivors.

They always described trials against Frank as “stepping on legos in the middle of the night” or something akin to that. You never felt like that, though—when he chased you, it felt fair. Almost as if he played nice with you. And more often than not, the killer would let you go when he caught you. The reason remained a mystery to you until quite a bit later.

This trial, Frank was in 100% bastard mode. You had begun to think of his trials as quite easy due to his seemingly calm nature around you, so you were rather caught off guard when he downed you in the first 30 seconds of the match and tossed you onto a hook, no gentleness whatsoever.

You wanted to yell at him and ask what the fuck was wrong with him until you realized this was his fucking job, and this is how he should have been treating you all along. Maybe you had just been imagining it all, but you could have sworn he used to leave you alone more than this. Something just felt different.

After you were unhooked, he went for you again. And again. And then you were dead, completely wiped out of the trial. Frank had demolished you with no remorse.

You knew it was silly to feel betrayed, but you really couldn’t help it. In such an insane and hellish place, anything that could be even remotely perceived as kindness seemed like so much more of a big deal than it truly was. So Frank’s supposed “gentleness” with you had felt somewhat like a friend doing you a selfless favor. Of course, it was not a selfless favor, and it was certainly nowhere near kindness, because he was still a killer chasing you with a knife, but your standards had really lowered in this place.

After that trial, you were back to hating Frank for tunneling and bullying you (like you probably should). You began to understand the survivors’ saying about the legos—and you hoped that Frank would step on some legos too, because he fucking sucked sometimes.

And for a while, that’s just how it was. You nearly forgot how he used to go easier on you, and how you used to do okay in his matches. Now every time you were pit against each other it just felt like you were being stuck with a bunch of pins; you never had any time to breathe or rest or do literally anything. He just went after you until you were gone, and there was next to nothing you could do about it.

Everything changed very suddenly during a trial at Ormond.

You were expecting the same old routine with this asshole—chase, blah blah blah, die. You hardly had energy to fight back anymore.

So when he arrived out of breath at the killer shack, somehow knowing you would be here, Frank was surprised to find you relaxing under the window with your arms loosely crossed, a disapproving scowl upon your countenance. It was enough to make him hesitate in his tracks.

You let out a deep breath, refusing to break eye contact with his mask; you kept up that menacing frown for as long as you could, trying to make him feel guilty (who knows if it was even possible for him to feel guilty? But it was worth a try).

“Just kill me,” you said, voice steady and seemingly unbothered. Underneath the surface, you were trembling, but you stood your ground. “That’s what you’re gonna do, isn’t it? You’re going to chase me until I’m miserable and kill me off as soon as you can?”

Frank went still, not even fidgeting with his knife like he usually did; he was intrigued by your sudden confidence.

You went on. “I’m really sick and tired of you, you know that? I’m sick of you and your bullshit. Why can’t you treat me like everybody else? At first, you went easy on me. Now you just torture me with your stupid mind games, and frankly, I’m sick of playing! I’m done with you—I don’t care anymore! Just kill me, and I’ll get out of your way, okay asshole? Mori me if you want. I don’t give a shit.”

You put your hands up exasperatedly, fully expecting him to take the offer and just send you back to the campfire right then and there. But the man sighed, pocketed his knife, and sat down right next to you as if this were a normal thing for him to do.

You scooted a few inches away out of instinct. Frank noticed, but he chose not to say a word about it.

It was a long time before he said anything, and when he finally did, you wanted to punch him so bad.

“It’s complicated,” he mumbled. And that was all.

Oh, yeah? It was complicated? You scoffed, hanging your head with a bitter smile. “Oh, okay. Sure.”

Silence again.

Awkward, suffocating silence.

And then Frank got up and left. You were unbothered for the remainder of the trial, not even a scratch or bruise on your body.

Sometimes you simply did things, and you didn’t know why. This thing that you just did was irrational, stupid, unplanned, unwise, and everything in-between, and you knew it was, but frequently you just had no impulse control. Perhaps it was the Entity’s influence, or maybe you had always been this way—you couldn’t really remember.

How did you get here again? Why were you laying on the ground? And why did your leg hurt so fucking much?

Oh, yes. Yes, yes, you remember now.

Funnily enough, it seems as though the Entity, along with certain killers, did not like it when survivors tried to enter their side of the forest! But you did it anyways, and it appeared that you had suffered the consequences. It’s not like you had put much thought into it; where was the point in that when nothing mattered anymore and you were stuck in an endless cycle of death?

You remembered entering the killer’s woods, looking around, and doing…something. What was that something? You couldn’t be sure, but then you remembered somebody coming up to you and probably definitely hurting you. Yep, your leg definitely was in a lot of pain. You couldn’t even look at it. Did you pass out for a while? Maybe. How long were you out for?

You lay still there for a while, thinking. Man, it really hurt, and boy, were you miserable. Maybe more miserable than you’d ever felt here. The Entity normally healed wounds immediately, but perhaps you had just angered it so much you deserved to suffer.

Oh, dear! You seemed to be passing out at this time. Yes, that was almost certainly what was happening. Black spots danced across your eyes as your body began to feel distant and numb, but you didn’t feel very worried about it. In fact, you felt like making jokes right now, but you had nobody to make jokes to and you probably couldn’t even speak.

Just as you began to accept it, there was a strange thumping sensation vibrating through the ground growing closer…and closer…

Footsteps! That’s good!

Oh. Not if it’s a killer. That’s not good, probably.

But you had no way of protesting when you felt yourself being picked up, because those black spots in your eyes were dancing a lot faster now, perhaps something akin to an Irish jig, and you also couldn’t feel your limbs.

Then you were fast asleep again, dreaming of Irish dancers who were actually big fluffy cloud people wearing leprechaun clothes. Nobody but you would ever know this, and it was going to stay that way.

On the bright side, it made it a lot easier for your rescuer to carry you to safety like this.

When you awoke once more, you were horrified to find yourself in the Ormond lodge of all places. You knew immediately what had happened and were determined to escape as soon as possible.

Your injured leg proved to be a huge problem, however, and you collapsed the second you attempted to find freedom. Trying again, you collapsed once more, and probably maimed yourself further in the process.

Hearing the commotion from the second floor, your least favorite member of The Legion descended down from the main stairs, refusing to look directly at you even as he scooped you up and plunked you (gently) back onto the couch, which was rather comfortable (not that you would ever tell him that).

So he was playing it cool, huh?

Okay. You could play it cool, too. You were cool. Smooth as butter.

No. You really couldn’t be cool in a situation like this, and plus, your mind was still a little woohoo since whatever accident had occurred. Suddenly you blurted out, “Frank, I hate your guts.”

And he had the audacity to laugh. He laughed at you! He did the man chuckle thing, as if what you were saying was funny. No! You were completely serious! You did hate his guts!

Perhaps your face showed how upset you were, because he started to apologize (still laughing).

“Maybe you should go back to sleep,” Frank said after calming down a bit.

No. You couldn’t go back to sleep. You did not want to experience dancing cloud people dressed as leprechauns ever again in your life, for the rest of eternity. Never again.

So you shook your head violently, refusing to give an explanation, which just provoked Frank to anger all of a sudden. If you went back to sleep, he could have some alone time while the rest of The Legion was gone. He kept pushing, and you kept resisting, and he pushed and you resisted, until finally he gave up and let you off with a warning. If you made him mad again, he was throwing you out in the snow.

Fine with me, you said. Okay, I’ll do it right now, he said. No balls, you said.

So then Frank casually went to scoop you up in his arms again, and you started to freak out and beat your hands against his chest until he put you back down. He was was awfully mindful of your hurt leg for someone who was about to throw you into the snow.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry—please don’t throw me out,” you fussed. You thought he wouldn’t actually do it. You didn’t know it, but you were right—he was just messing with you because it was funny seeing you scared.

After a bit more griping back and forth, Frank began to grow concerned about your leg. He didn’t know how to bring up the topic because things were so odd between the two of you; this was your first interaction since the brief encounter in the shack. But he swallowed his pride, because the wound seemed to be getting worse by the minute.

“Hey, do you want me to, uhh…get some supplies?” Frank asked awkwardly. When you didn’t understand, he continued, “Your leg? It looks like it hurts…I could fix it if you want.”

You barked out a laugh at his words, unbelieving of this shift in attitude. “Rich coming from the guy who tried to kill me three days ago,” you snickered, genuinely finding it amusing.

Frank took offense. He was trying to be nice for once, and you thought it was funny. And his situation really was complex, whether you chose to believe it or not. Maybe he should just tell you to get it off of his chest.

“Listen,” he said, voice laced with seriousness. “When I told you things were complicated, I meant it.”

Sensing the mood change from his tone and body language, you stopped smiling and decided to pay attention to him. Just this once. Never again. After this you could go back to hating him.

Frank continued. “The Entity was going to start…well, hurting me, if I didn’t start doing better in trials. I really didn’t want to sacrifice you, which is embarrassing to admit, but I’ll say it. And I don’t think it liked that.”

You were surprised. And also relieved that you had been right all along—he had been going easy on you at first.

“Why me, though?” you asked, confused. “Why wouldn’t you want to sacrifice me? What about the other survivors?”

If the slight tilt of his head at your question didn’t answer it for you, the way he started tapping his feet and cracking his knuckles so nervously did.

Boy, if looks could kill, you would have died instantly at the scowl Frank sent your way; you grinned pridefully at the realization that this man was down bad. You couldn’t see the expression behind his mask, though, which Frank was thankful for.

He hated every second of this, but you loved it. You reveled in his embarrassment.

Leaning forward on your hands, you begged, “Tell me more! I want to hear all about your feelings for me.”

“I could stab you right now, you know that?”

“But you won’t. You liiiiike me!”

“What are you, eight years old?”

“No, but I am severely injured and have lost a lot of blood so I am not necessarily in the right headspace at the moment.”

“You make a fair point.”

“So tell me! What’s your favorite thing about me?”

“Your ass.”

“No, really.”

“Okay, your ass and your hair.”

“You know what, Frank, I still hate your guts.”

“No, you don’t.”

You paused for a moment. It was probably the blood loss talking, you decided later, but you said, “No. Maybe I don’t.”

#:) i kinda rly like this ahaha it was fun #i hope it’s okay <3 #fruggo writes #requests #enemies to lovers prompt #frank morrison x reader #frank morrison #the legion x reader #the legion #dbd x reader #dbd oneshot #dbd writing #dead by daylight x reader #dead by daylight #dbd #dbd frank

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sajdd · 3 years ago

Text

i will never understand people who try to seperate c!tommy and c!dream as if their stories and character progression arent interwoven with each other

their dynamic is so interesting and tragic...

they used to genuinely be friends, brothers even. dream would antagonise tommy a lot, he would break his own rules and do things to get on tommy's nerves to play with him, but back then we all saw it as some light-hearted fun, its how tommy saw it too. he had fun in this little play-war they had going on

and then came wilbur. then came lmanberg. and suddenly he was spending more time around his actual brother. he was actually fighting against dream, it wasn't just play anymore. so then came the declaration of independence, and so came the declaration of war. the burned down house, the blown up land, the final control room, the duel, the trade.

but tommy didn't truly hate dream, not yet. but dream’s motives were so unclear, what was the truth? and what was a lie? switching sides so many times, trying to push away the blame from himself, wanting to support tommy in taking back l’manberg to helping wilbur blow up the whole place and teaming with schlatt. and so came the final battle of pogtopia and manberg, there were no winners that day but there was hope. they survived, and tommy would get his disks back from dream.

and then came exile. nothing would ever be the same for them. dream wanted tommy all to himself, and if that meant he had to cut off his contact with everyone else and quite literally beat it into his head that he is tommy's only friend? well.. some sacrifices have to be made. he'll come around eventually... and he did! but then dream pushed him too far and he ran away.

tommy was under technoblade's protection for a while, but dream couldnt afford to waste his favour on that. so he waited, and he planned. their alliance was short-lived anyway, as soon as tommy realised what he truly cared about it was over. naturally, he was going to side with the blood god himself. i mean, what better way to rub his victory into tommy’s face. his expression was priceless! this kid is just too much fun.

and he'll roam free for now, until their final battle. he'll get rid of that pest called tubbo and he can finally put tommy somewhere he cant escape from :) but then punz shows up and drags the rest of the server with him. betrayed. and tommy has the upper hand now- except. he has also secret card up his sleeve. the revive book. tommy wont get rid of him if he can potentially bring back his beloved brother.

and while dream is stuck rotting in prison, tommy starts healing. he gets better. but.. its so weird without dream. so why not visit him! to rub his victory in his face and show how much better everything is without him. how much better he's doing. he's here to rub it in his face and not because he still feels so lonely and dream is his friend and please god why wont someone love me- and the hotel is going great, he's inviting people and healing and noone comes except for the people trying to kill him but he's still friends with tubbo even if they're drifting apart and he has ranboo and why am i being replaced what did i do wrong and he goes to visit dream for the final time, its really time to put an end to this.

and then there's explosions. muffled through the obsidian walls surrounded in lava. the inescapable, unbreakable, impenetrable prison is being blown up. and dream is laughing. and dream is not surprised. and tommy is stuck with dream, because sam wont let him out its protocol and he’s stuck with dream and itll be just like exile tommy.

but he manages to survive, he cant breathe and the walls are closing in and he just wishes someone would come save him at least this one time but nobody comes. and dream is talking of partnership and running away together but there is no "us", tommy's going to get out of here and dream will die sad and alone and i bet the revive book isnt even real- and then he's screaming for help but it comes too late. he's being ripped apart and all he knows is pain and void and oh god its wilbur again. he exists in this darkness for 2 months before getting dragged back to life by the devil himself.

and there will be no more normal ever again. even the slightest pain reminds him of dying and limbo and wilbur and we can be immortal together tommy! and oh my god he has to kill dream no one should have that much power and wilbur cant come back-

and of course wilbur comes back. because he fucked up. tommy fucked up and now sam is angry, and tubbo and ranboo are angry and ghostbur is dead and wilbur is back and dream is alive rotting in that prison and why cant i just have peace for one moment what did i do to deserve this

and then his brother proclaims dream a hero. and why would he say that he knows what he did to me why would he say that

and so dream waits for wilbur to come. he knows he'll visit, he's indebted to him, he will be SO grateful for bringing him back. and if he can control wilbur then he can control tommy. and they can be friends again.

and maybe its time tommy accepted he cant run away from dream. for as long as he’s alive they are destined to be together. after all, he is tommy's friend. the one constant throughout this whole story. they have too much fun together. he was the one person who was there when no one else was. and no matter how much he hates it, somewhere deep down he still cares about dream and it makes him feel sick. but once tommy has love for you in his heart he can never really let go of it, no matter how much you might hate him or hurt him, he will still love you, remembering the good times, the fun times. and that's all dream wants doesn't he? he just wants to have fun.

(sorry this was so long idk what came over me also my thought process in the tags)

#lmao sorry this is so long and rambly #i started off wanting to explain smth but i basically ended up writing a fanfic #this is supposed to be messy btw #ITS MENTAL ILLNESS INNIT #their dynamic is just so interesting because of how it descended into this unhealthy obsession dream has with tommy and what he did to him #but he genuinely cares for him but in this.. sick and twisted way #and we know how tommy is with those he cares about. he never really stops caring #and he forgives #even if hes pissed off #its a tragic dynamic and its so interesting #it all falls apart so terribly #so dont seperate these two characters and stories because they are vital to each others development and story progression #just. so interesting #and horrifying #this was fun to write even if im shit at writing #long post #tommyinnit #dream smp #dreamwastaken #c!tommy #c!dream #c!dream critical #this isnt rlly critical but i dont want the apologists to come after me because i dont woobify dream lmao

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red-doll-face · 4 years ago

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Here is a request for slashers if they're open. My brain does a thing where I am affectionate w a person but if I get nudged away (even if it's just to readjust the position), it goes "oh no. They don't want u to touch them. Do not touch ever again or they will get mad at u. U disgust them." Even tho touch is my love language & it hurts, I just won't touch. If confronted, I will get confused & panicky cuz "u didn't want me to touch? Im respecting ur wishes? Did I miss something?" Its a mess.

Requests are indeed open, I’m sorry I take foreverrr to do these but i hope u enjoy! I don’t know what to call this tho. For simplicity’s sake I’m calling this nervous reader lmao, idk what else to call these.

Slashers x gn nervous Reader

Jason Voorhees:

Jason can very much relate to the feeling. When he first meets you, he’s sure that you’re frightened. He restrains from being too close to avoid coming off as overbearing, doesn't want to touch you because if you flinch he’ll be so hurt. He just assumes he disgusts you. Based on the reaction all of his other victims have when they see him, he’s sure you’ll probably be the same.

Once Jason is sure that you don't feel that way, he’s a cuddle monster. He wants to be close all of the time, holding hands, letting you sit in his lap, you name it. He’s so starved and quickly decides that touch is his love language too. He’s not even sure how he’s lived this long without it.

The only time I can see Jason maybe gently sort of setting you down elsewhere and walking off is when he senses strangers on the property of what once was Crystal Lake. He’s out the door before he can even see your hurt expression, Which is worse because this might lead you to jump to conclusions.

If you distance yourself from Jason, he immediately is thrown off. He can’t directly ask you if he’s done something wrong and when he tries to initiate affection with you and you don’t reciprocate whole heartedly, he’s at a loss.

He’ll get on one knee while you sulk on the couch and give you a silent plea to tell him what's wrong. You can panic and try and avoid it but he is certain there's something going on and he wants so badly to know what he’s done to put you off. You tell him and he immediately is shaking his head no, he could never be mad at you, never be disgusted with you. You’re the most breathtaking person he’s ever had the pleasure of holding, the first, most likely.

Jason nods because he understands how you feel. In the future, he’s persistent about how you feel when he untangles himself from you, making sure you’re ok.

Michael Myers:

In the later stages of your relationship, Michael is insatiable when it comes to being in contact with you. For a long time, towards the start of your relationship, he didn’t like it. It felt weird. All of the touch he's experienced prior was so clinical and sterile that he doesn’t quite know how good touch is supposed to feel. He’s so touch starved that he’s almost positive he doesn't even need it.

Slowly, he builds a tolerance for it, much like one does with alcohol, constantly checking his boundaries and letting him control the situation and he’s all for movie night, huddled up on the couch, or waking up with his head on your chest. His own personal pillow.

There are, however, moments when his need to make someone tremble with fear and then blodgeon them to death with a can opener from their own kitchen becomes too strong, so he tries to keep away from you. In the past, he might have used you to satisfy similar desires of a sexual nature and may have really hurt you but he knows that it’s not always enjoyable to you.

Then, you stop touching him. Much like Jason, he starts to think you’ve become sick of him. Sick of his coldness, his muteness, his withdrawn demeanor. Maybe you’ve moved on and he tries to tell himself he doesn’t care but he doesn't think he can see himself touching anyone but you now.

It gets to the point where he comes home one day and you look heavily troubled, expressions he’s seen on your face before, only in the event that something terrible has happened. You ask to speak to him and he obliges.

You explain that you don’t think this relationship is working, that you’re pretty sure he’s disgusted with you and how difficult this event is because you didn't even want to talk about it but it's been hurting you for too long.

His response is to stand up very slowly, pick you up and lay down with you over him, simply laying there. Hopefully, knowing you’re the one person he would ever allow to participate in this intimacy is enough to show you that you mean more than you think you do to him.

RZ Michael Myers:

This Michael is more perceptive to your touch than his counterpart, your touch sends little shivers down his spine and as soon as he gets pretty used to it, he’s eager for more. This also takes some time but significantly less. He’s enamored with the idea of returning to a somewhat normal life. Your affection grounds him in that fantasy as much as being a murderer might take him out of it.

As he establishes a relationship with you, he may even be the one to start touching you instead of the other way around. He’s read books and always wondered what it might feel like to have someone genuinely touch him without fear in their eyes. Without malice.

An unsuccessful ‘day at work’ might have Michael feeling a little het up though. He can be moody and more rageful. Neither you nor his hobbies can calm him. He seems colder than usual in these states and can come off as very standoffish.

So when you try and touch him and he shrugs your hand off his shoulder, he can’t or isn't in the state of mind to address your frown and worried look. Michael, instead stomps off somewhere to be alone for a while; maybe take his anger out on something else. Some unsuspecting soul or maybe even a poor animal in the wrong place at the wrong time.

After he’s calmed down some, he returns and almost forgot about that sad little gleam in your eye before he left. Michael remembers when he sees you blankly staring at the TV, pointedly avoiding his gaze even as you utter a weak welcome home. It’s not very welcoming. He sits stiffly beside you, watching you from the corner of his eye. You’re closed off from him and he doesn't like it at all.

Migrating towards you slowly, he eases you into a familiar hug, his big bear hugs that are a little tight but inviting all the same. His huge torso and long arms seem to swallow you in his warmth. You hardly reciprocate. You look a little surprised. Though he never addresses it verbally, (which is probably better for you) Michael offers a single glance that communicates everything he needs to say. Don't ever think that again.

Thomas B. Hewitt:

Thomas’ self esteem issues and self image are not good. He honestly doesn’t like to imagine what he looks like to other people unless it can be as a threatening man you don’t fuck with. Meeting you, he realizes that it’s good to protect his family but he’d rather you not see him as someone only capable of harm. Tries his best to get the point across that while Hoyt may be adamant that horrible things happen to you, he’s not going to let them.

Thomas has received affection but always a familial affection. A pat on the back from Monty, proud claps to his shoulders from uncle Charlie, and hugs and kisses from his dear Mother. Nothing so foreign as a strangers touch over his arm or a soft embrace.

Unfortunately, Thomas can get reactive when you attempt to touch him without his mask on. He’s absolutely settled on the false reality that you’ll see his face and immediately decide that you never want to touch him again. Interacting with you with his bare face? That's a no for Thomas.

He puts on his mask that covers the scarred skin over his face and you look dejected. He was preparing for you to pressure him but instead finds himself trying to find out why you won’t touch him now. It’s not his face, is it? You respond with your reasoning. Thomas is so confused. How could you think that you disgust him? That he doesn’t want you to touch him?

He’s quicker than the others and immediately sweeps you up into his arms and holds you as close as humanly possible. Feeling disgusting and like some sort of burden is a feeling he’s so familiar with and if he can take it away from you, he will.

Will aggressively initiate touch with you for the next week or so just to solidify the fact that he cares about you and won't reject you just as you didn’t reject him.

Bubba Sawyer:

Bubba is a great cuddle buddy and partner. Hugs are his favorite and he hugs his brother all the time, lifting both Nubbins and Chop Top into the air for some brotherly love. If you’re smaller than them he’s all about picking you up and perhaps a little rough housing with you. He’s careful though or at least there are attempts made to be careful

Bubba, though he could easily spend the whole day doing nothing and everything with you, has work. Chores, butchering. Cooking, and tending livestock. Plenty to do at the sawyer house and he does most of it. Suffice to say there are times when you want to lather attention all over him yet he has to go back to work.

So caught up in work that he doesn't get what's going on til way later, when you’ve had time to stew in your emotions, firmly telling yourself that Bubba is annoyed by you probably. He’s baffled and confused at your silence, your crossed arms. The little furrow in your brow. He can already tell there’s something upsetting you.

Honestly, Bubba is so affectionate I can’t see him being the kind of person even capable of alluding to the fact he might be disgusted by you. How, if all he wants to do is love you? You may bring it up as a joke that you thought he didn’t like you and he almost seems offended. Not like you?

Bubba can squash any feelings you may have about that and then some. He will not let you drown in insecurities, not on his watch. This man will do everything in his power to make you feel beautiful because you really are.

I’m sorry these are super long but thanks for requesting!

#slasher x reader #michael myers #michael myers x reader #halloween #rz halloween movie #rz michael myers #rz michael myers x reader #jason voorhees #jason voorhees x reader #friday the 13th #thomas brown hewitt x reader #thomas brown hewitt #thomas hewitt #bubba sawyer x reader #bubba sawyer #leatherface x reader #texas chainsaw massacre #slashers

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levworship · 4 years ago

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OKAY, I cant get this out of my head. It's usually tsukishima that always has the upper hand against yamaguchi right???? BUT, it comes to Yamas attention that tsukishima is a virgin and yamaguchi takes so much pity on poor tsuki that he offers to help him out. So yama came to you, his cute little girlfriend with this amazing opportunity to help out his best friend. And ofc you say yes..why would his cute little baby say no?

I love you, drink water and eat something you haven't already😤🥰‼️

finally writing again. shocker, i know. also thank you nonster ilysm <3

cw: dom!yams (kinda), mentions of yama x tsukki, reader is cute idk i like her, virgin!tsukki, tsukki being mean in his head, yamaguchi also just a tad bit mean, idk what else?, just a handjob (for now), prob errors

word count: 1054

summary: yamaguchi being the sweetheart he is and sharing his precious girlfriend with his best friend <3

the sight of the two of you always made tsukki feel sick to his stomach. watching his best friend be all lovey dovey with someone who’s so disgustingly sweet as well? it was no wonder he avoided you two at all costs.

he avoided making eye contact with you two even throughout high school. at games, in the hallways, during lunch. but he especially avoided it right now. he was afraid to peer up through the foggy lens of his glasses, because he knew the moment that he did-

he’d be forced to meet you guys’ gazes. those precious smiles still beaming down at him even with the undeniable hunger behind both of your eyes.

tsukishima scowled, turning his head as if he’d found something more interesting to stare at on the ground. when tadashi initially made the offer to him, he simply shrugged it off as bluff. especially since he figured there was no way you’d agree. but...

“come on, tsukki.” the blond flinched when your fingers just barely skimmed the skin of his arm almost as if you were afraid to break him. the harmless action still somehow managed to offend him. were you mocking him? did the two of you think you were better because you just so happened to have sex before he did? he could have sex if you wanted. he didn’t need your help. he didn’t need either of you.

yet, even as those thoughts echoed in his head, he simply couldn’t deny the fact that for whatever reasoning, he still showed up at your doorstep and faced you two with shuffling feet and fading pride.

he tsked once - twice- before he finally grew some balls and turned to look the two of you in the eye. and god did he regret it, because he was immediately greeted by the sight of the two of you pawing at him to rid him of his baggy clothes. the pairs of hands gripping and grabbing at each inch of visible skin had tsukishima’s face flushed an embarrassing shade of pink, adam’s apple bobbing in his throat until finally you two had stopped acting like fumbling teens and stripped him down to his boxers, erection pressing humiliatingly hard against the dampened fabric. it was amusing to him, how even as the two of you managed to lead him into the intimacy of your bedroom, he still held a higher sense of maturity and composure over you both.

at least, that’s how he viewed it in his mind. even a passing glance at him would reveal just how nervous he was. quite literally shaking where he lay.

“remember to be gentle, okay?” tsukishima scoffed at this. “relax tadashi. i am not going to hur-“ “i wasn’t talking about you.” yamaguchi cut him off with a piercing look that sent shivers throughout tsukki’s entire body like never before. since when did the freckled man have the ability to hinder him speechless so quickly? before he could even bother to crack out a weak comeback,

“oh shit—“ he hissed through his teeth when your small hand wrapped itself around his sensitive cock, successfully distracting him. his chest rose and fell heavily as his pretty eyelashes fluttered shut. “wow. you were right tadashi. i barely touched him and he’s already about to blow his load” you shook your head in genuine astonishment.

“has anyone else ever touched you here, tsukishima?”

even despite your sweet tone,, he wanted to bark at you. grab you by your hair and tug with all of his strength. shove you into the mattress and grunt in your ear that he wasn’t going to sit there and take shit from a slutty fucking brat like you. but how could he? how could he possibly let any words out before they melted away from him just as quickly as they’d formed in his mind? how could he think, when your thumb pressed itself against his tip, now red and swollen with reluctant want, and messily spread his precum across his cock. it was sloppy. it was dirty. your slender fingers tugged at his cock with a wet shlick that made his entire body tense with disgust and guilt from just how much he was enjoying your hand on him. he had to bite down on his lip to avoid making any noise. a weak attempt on his behalf to cling on to any pride he had left.

“-he’s long, too.”

the sound of your voice was enough to drag him out of his mind again. how long had you been talking? or were you too busy watching in shocked silence as he quits literally fell apart in your small grasp? were you and tadashi simply talking around him the entire time? he figured so, judging by the way both of you seemed to be almost observing his limp figure.

“mhm. but not as thick as me, is he baby?” tsukki’s stomach twisted when he watched the two of you engage in a sloppy kiss right in front of his eyes. he hated it, the not-so-PDA. or at least, he figured he did. but that wouldn’t explain why watching you two was already bringing him closer to his release than he’d like to admit.

yamaguchi seemed to read his mind somehow, humming when the two of you finally separated. a swift hand moved to grab your wrists. “‘gonna make him cum too soon, sweetheart. hurry up and get on top before he passes out” he chuckled before grabbing a handful of your ass, still clad in the pants you’d been wearing since tsukki showed up at your door.

fuck you. i don’t need you to get on top. you’ll regret talking about me like that when i have you and your fucking boyfriend bent over in front of me.

the violent words once again died in his throat before he had a chance to utter them. he watched you like a fucking horny mutt as you removed your clothes. his eyes remained glued onto your figure through his blurred vision (his glasses had been discarded a while ago), while yamaguchi’s eyes remained glued onto him. his expression was a mix of prideful and just a hint of possession if you stared for long enough. but it was hard to be selfish when you have your hot as fuck girlfriend and undeniably attractive best friend nearly blowing their lids trying to fuck each other.

who would wanna miss that sight?

i may do a part two where they actually screw if anyone is interested.

thirsts and requests for haikyuu and bnha are open.

#haikyuu smut #haikyu!! smut #tsukishima smut #yamaguchi smut #hq!! smut #tsukishima x reader x yamaguchi #tsukishima kei smut #yamaguchi tadashi smut #haikyuu dirty imagine #.chiyo’s works #.chiyo’s works hq

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leviiattacks · 4 years ago

Note

I loved Ceo Levi so can I request Ceo Levi comforting the reader because she’s in financial trouble? Idk the plot it’s up to you but that sort of idea. I hope it’s not too much of a bother!! Also happy birthday ❤️

author note :: very rushed and not that great at all but i hope it’s enjoyable anon !! also thank u for the birthday wish <333 if you’d like for me to idk expand on this request you can always request again my ask box is open !! <33333 word count :: 1.5k

levi’s worried about you

like super worried

ultra worried

mega, super, ultra worried?????

all the synonyms for large aren’t enough to explain how distracted he is whilst he stares at you from across the table.

the entire team meeting today you’ve sat down with a glazed expression, you’re clearly out of it and don’t want to be present

on a few occasions he notices you gnaw at your lips anxiously and your eyes shift everywhere showing you’re clearly uncomfortable

team meetings are normally two hours long on a monday to discuss production plans extensively but levi can’t even make it to the thirty minute mark before he’s dismissing everyone

“we’re ending early i don’t feel well.”

mr ackerman letting the team leave early again... it’s the second time he’s done it now but HEY, the employees have no complaints!!

levi knows something’s bothering you when you don’t move an inch from your seat

you probably haven’t even heard what he said about leaving because you’re so zoned out

now,,,,levi’s never really been big on physical contact and he’s not great at comforting or using words either but he still double checks the door is locked so he can speak to you privately

you start sobbing as soon as the sound of the door clicks

“y/n, what’s wrong?” he’s cautious in his approach but places a hand on top of yours gently to test the waters

but you only start crying even more ?!?,!,

which panics him because oh my god what did he do...???,?.

did he do something wrong???

you know what, he’s just going to copy what people do in the movies and hope it goes well

your sobs echo through the room and he thanks himself that the cement walls are definitely thick enough for you to not be heard by your colleagues

slowly but gradually you get a grip and it almost looks like you have to force yourself to a halt midway just to wipe the tears at your eyes

it’s at times like these that levi thanks you for having an expressive face because he would hate to not notice you felt this horrible

“i suggest you carry on if you haven’t got it all out yet. from personal experience it’s better when someone sits with you.”

levi’s warm words embrace you and you look at his arms then his heat pressed suit. he’s in a completely different world compared to you and a feeling of sickness soon overpowers the warm feeling in your chest

why are you sitting here and crying like a pathetic fool in front of your boss??

ok, maybe he’s a little more personal than a boss you aren’t sure what he really is but that doesn’t matter

“y/n, i have something to say.”

FUCK. this is it. you’ll be fired for being unprofessional and improper. this is IT. the end of your professional career.

you want to run out of this room at full speed and hurl yourself out of one of the windows never to be seen again...

but,, you won’t do that, that’s embarrassing

instead you steel yourself and look at him with as much courage as you can muster (which to be clear is not very much)

“if you ever need to take a day off for mental health reasons you’ve always been allowed to so please feel free to take the rest of the day off if you’d like.”

he’s... not firing you?

“but before that, would you like to let me know what’s happened? can i maybe help?”

you purse your lips feeling the premature humiliation

he can help, anyone with as much money as him can but you don’t want him to aid you. the guilt would eat you away

but you do want to confide in him and tell him what’s wrong

you want to tell someone about it at least

“i’ve been evicted from my apartment” your voice is barely above a whisper and levi just looks at you mouth agape

he pays you enough to live comfortably

how could you be getting evicted?

“i have to pay for my mother’s medical expenses so it’s stressful i send most of my earnings hom-”

levi shushes you with his input. “i’ll pay off the debt so you don’t be evicted and i’ll also give you a pay rise.”

at that you’re just pure shocked

is he even thinking right now???

because this isn’t the strong willed strategic business man you know

“no??? i can’t leech off of you??”

“you’re not leeching. i am investing in you.”

you’re a little lost now but choose to hear him out

“you work for me already and i greatly value your work. now you’re in a tough position. correct?”

you nod your head in response

“and for you to still work for me you’ll need a home. correct?”

again you nod

“so allow me to pay off the debts. it’s for both of our benefit.”

that however really isn’t levi’s reasoning at all. he couldn’t care less about that, he just doesn’t want to see you shoulder the pain and stress of it all alone

staring at him teary eyed you sniffle

“would you-” your voice cracks and you cough “really???”

you look so desperate and vulnerable and levi feels frustrated for not spotting the warning signs of your struggle any sooner

you had been coming to the office looking more restless, you had been drinking more coffee and despite the excessive caffeine consumption he still caught you dozing off at your desk at least four times

he places a hand on the centre of your back and pats you three times as if you’re members on the same ship

“yes i mean it, take it easy.”

his simple sentence is enough to cause all of your rational thinking to jump away and you drag him in by the neck into a tight hug

you’re ugly crying and you know you’ll look back on this in embarrassment but your mind works on impulse, you’re unable to stop it

usually levi doesn’t like anyone messing up his suits but he can make an exception for you. he’s sure your tears have left a moist patch but he’s not mad. hell, even if you get snot on his expensive dress shirt he’ll be okay with it

“is there any way i can pay you back mr ackerman?”

he winces at the formality of your tone

“call me levi.”

your brows raise at the request

“that’s what i want in return. for you to call me levi.”

????

that’s all???

“oh, well thank you levi. i’m grateful...”

his name rolls off your tongue awkwardly the first few times and even he regrets asking you to call him by his first name

but three days later you’re walking in breezily. a pen is tucked behind your ear and you’re double checking levi’s spending sheet with a calculator in your hands.

levi literally STOPS breathing because you look so refreshed today and the colour is back on your face. you look your best when you’re stress free.

and then you say it

“levi, do you think you could spend a bit less on tea bags because OH MY LORD???”

he notices there’s no longer an air of discomfort to his name and his chest swells happily

“y/n, give me ONE good reason to not spend my money that way??”

you notice how he easily he says your first name with an airy chuckle and you could almost... ALMOST... swear the two of you are flirting

to anyone observing with no sound he looks as nonchalant as normal but really the tone of his voice is implying the suggestive nature of conversation

“maybe you should spend your money on other things you like?” your suggestion is thrown back in your face when levi scoffs choking back a laugh

“i already am spending my money on other interests of mine.”

turning to face him and to hand him a file of paperwork you look him right in the eyes

“and what interests would those be?”

levi’s gaze meander down to your lips before shooting back up to your eyes and you swear you feel a tingle in the pit of your stomach

“i’ll let you figure that out on your own. you’re smart enough.”

you’re gaping at that reply because how are you meant to know???

but, the answer to your question is far more obvious than you think.

and it’s only after work whilst you’re eating dinner that you’re able to connect the dots

he was, talking about...you??

gasping you flush bright pink and bury your face into one of your sofa’s pillows

no way, there’s no way that happened

oh no, but there really is a way

and that way is levi ackerman ;-)

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