not a gamer * fem!driver
lando manages to convince her to start streaming on twitch with him, leading her to influence others to join her
pairings: max verstappen x fem!driver, lando norris x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver, logan sargeant x fem!driver
warnings: butt load of stupidity
notes: initially, i was gonna write a fic solely about max because he was talking about fornite the other day... but i thought how funny would it be if it were to be with some of the guys so here i am
(series masterlist) | (📂 the rookie season)
"hello, everyone," she smiles, reaching forward to adjust the camera as she squints her eyes. "is this a good angle? let me know if it's flattering, okay? i can't not look good on twitch."
lando has managed to convince her to join him for a stream on twitch, insisting that she should start an account as well. she initially refused, claiming that she's not that well-liked to start an account and have a loyal following. even adding on the fact that she's not even a good gamer to begin with.
but lando said that it doesn't matter, and proved her wrong by setting up a poll on his previous stream just to get her to make an account. which, the effort was very endearing.
"you always look good," she squints, turning away the right where her other monitor sits. she scrunches her nose and turns to the camera to stare into it. "logan, how did you even know i was streaming tonight?"
she rolls her eyes when his reply rolls in, claiming that he follows her twitter where she announced it. "it's time for you to go out and do something else besides stalking me, logan," she scoffs jokingly with the roll of her eyes.
"okay, so this is my first twitch stream!" she beams, sitting up straighter as she grabs her mouse. "i'm just waiting for lando to finish setting up, so i'm afraid you guys are stuck with me alone for a couple of minutes. let's get to know each other, i might be doing this pretty often this winter break just to have a bit of a hobby.
"i wanna know what you guys want to see from me."
a comment immediately rolls in.
user1: i wanna see you play fortnite with lando and max
she grins sheepishly, dropping her head. "guys, i'm not much of a gamer. never have been so this is actually my first time-ish touching games in a long while. my longest experience was playing roblox with my younger brother when we were younger."
user2: how about oscar or logan playing some games?
she presses her lips together, thinking of ways she could be able to convince her best friends to join her for some online games. when, neither of them has really dabbled much in the hobby. "i'm sure logan will be pretty keen to try, but i'm not so sure about oscar. i'll try to convince him, though he's back in australia for the majority of the break, unfortunately. the timezone difference is absolutely insane."
logansargeant: guys, ask her what her hobbies are
"logan, get off my chat!"
logansargeant: im gonna expose you on twitter for cyberbullying
logansargeant: #endcyberbullying2023
user3: #justice4logan
user4: #justice4logan
user5: u should talk about taylor swift
“oh, my god! i should!” she squeals. “we should host a listen party when she releases reputation! how good was the 1989 vault tracks?”
user6: omg ur so right
user7: iion slaps
user8: slut! is my favourite i think
“1989 had the best vault tracks,” she nods, lips pressed together. “my favourite is ‘now that we don’t talk’ because i like calling my mom.”
blythe.yln: where is lando!!!
“guys, i don’t know. he texted me 5 minutes ago saying he was setting up his pc,” she grins into the camera. “hopefully he’s here soon.”
dalton.yln: i miss oscar
oscahpastry: i miss u too
“you’ve got phones, yeah?” she grins, “use it instead of flooding my chat.”
user1: yeah guys, some of us are trying to get her attention
user9: u guys get that enough
user10: leave some for us pls
user11: yeah y so selfish
she scoffs. "right, guys? can you believe these people?"
the discord sound makes her jump, lando's voice filling up her headphones. "yo, i'm sorry! i was looking for my keyboard."
"where'd you find it, lando?"
"under the bed. apparently, that's where i kept it the last time i streamed," lando laughs. "okay, let's start off with a little horror game? it's called phasmophobia."
"a scary game?" she looks at the camera. "why would i willingly play that?"
"lando, i'm gonna kill you!" she screeches, eyes closing as the creepy sounds from the game boost in her headphones. she peeks through her eye, watching the two hands on her screen before the screen goes foggy.
lando's laughter replaces the eerie sounds of the game, making her roll her eyes. "i told you to hide and close the door!”
“i didn’t know where the stupid door even was!” she screams back, slamming the table. “lando, i don’t wanna play this game anymore!”
“but it’s so fun!”
“lando!”
logansargeant: that was funny
logansargeant: lemme join u some time
user11: omg
user11: half the grid’s gonna be on twitch?
“yeah, i’m so nice, right?” she jokes. “i’m letting them explore different career options. influencer era or something, i believe.”
oscahpastry: i only created an account to annoy her :/
seb.v5: same
user12: no shot thats actually sebastian vettel
maxverstappen1: so we are all just here waiting for an invite from these two???
logansargeant: theyre gatekeeping the stream from us :(
maxverstappen1: i wanna play fortnite
seb.v5: wait i know that game
maxverstappen1: let me join or i’ll report your account
“that’s not very nice, max,” she frowns. she looks away for a second. “lando, max says he’ll report my account if we don’t invite him to play fortnite.”
“oh, let him report you. just make another account, mate!” lando laughs. “ask him to join us phasmophobia! it’s so fun seeing you scream.”
she turns to the camera with a lopsided grin. “chat, tell lando you don’t wanna see me scream in phasmo anymore please. i’m sick of this game, i’ve got no idea what i’m doing, and i haven’t guessed the ghost correctly this entire time.”
logansargeant: keep playing phasmophobia u pussy
oscahpastry: yeah pussy
user5: its v entertaining icl
maxverstappen1: but phasmophobia costs money
“costs money?” she repeats, confusion on her face. “max? do you need financial aid?”
user10: isnt max a millionaire??????
user13: bro is complaining about a game that barely costs anything while getting paid millions a year 💀
oscahpastry: that’s wild ngl
maxverstappen1: wow i just got cyberbullied.
maxverstappen1: i’ll go get it now damn.
she sighs. “guess we’re continuing with this stupid game.”
“lando, where am i going?” max shouts, her character watching max’s go around in circles, flickering the flashlight on and off. “what am i even supposed to do?”
teaching one person how to play a complicated game like phasmophobia is easy. teaching two, however, is absolutely absurd. lando doesn’t know how much more of this he can take.
“lando, there’s something written in the book!” she cheers, crouching her character down. she leans into her monitor as she tries to make out what it says. “bitch, it says run!”
she quickly gets up and walks out. “don’t have to tell me twice.”
“run where?” max shouts, his character still running in circles. “(y/n), where are you? escort me out.”
“guys, just stay inside the house and help me out!” lando whines, his character flickering the flashlight at max’s. “turn around, max. i’m here with you.”
“i’m going to the van.”
“no, you’re not! come here and camp the ghost with us!”
“absolutely not! i’m so scared shitless!”
“we should’ve just played fortnite, you know.”
“guys, please! you just have to hold the equipment for me.”
“oh, my god! oh, my god! the front door is locked!” she screams. “the front door is locked!”
logansargeant: lol dsurv
oscahpastry: not so tough now (y/n)
user8: LMFAO THAT GHOST IS HUNTIN
user14: dude the chaos is insane
user15: i need her to stream everyday actually
user16: she’s gonna be an influencer i can feel it in my bones
user17: u guys should try valorant
oscahpastry: i’d join if they play valorant
user4: omg thats crazy
user18: i kinda want to see it
user19: max playing valorant? the rage that man would feel
“lando, i’m dead again!” she screeches, slamming her mouse down into her desk. “we should’ve just played fortnite.”
logansargeant: ur issues with the door are hilarious
user4: i’ll be thinking about your inability to hide in a room for days
oscahpastry: evidence that u wouldnt survive a horror movie at all
seb.v5: maybe you should stick to sitting there and looking pretty
user20: OMG SEB CALLED HER PRETTYYYYY
user21: are we all so shocked?
user22: yeah, he looks at that girl like she aligns the stars in the sky on a race weekend
user23: him during her podium celebration cured my depression (real)
logansargeant: girl why r u just stalking lando as a ghost
“lando,” she whispers. “i saw the ghost in the corner for the room.”
“what?” max asks, voice trembling slightly. “what corner?”
“that corner.”
“what corner?”
“there. i’m pointing at it.”
“i can’t see you, stupid. you’re dead.”
“then that’s too bad.”
“i figured what type of ghost it is!” lando cheers. “follow me, max. let’s get out of this stupid house and play your stupid fortnite or something.”
“oh, how lovely! i saw (y/n)’s chat… something about valorant,” max mutters, following lando through the dark house. “i’ve seen that on tiktok and it looks kinda- lando, why’d you close the door?”
“i told you i saw the ghost lurking more than usual,” she mutters.
“i don’t even know what that means!” max shouts.
“i didn’t close the door, mate!” lando laughs. “go and hide in a room, max!”
“where? i don’t know where to go!” max screams, frantically running around in hopes of finding solace somewhere.
her character follows behind the entity in the game, clearly running around to find max. “oh, she’s coming for you, max! she’s angry!”
“i don’t know where to go!” max screams, his character running by the entryway in confusion. “lando, where do i go?”
“max, she’s coming! go in the closet!”
“what closet? oh, okay! i see it!”
“close the door, max!”
“what door- oh! okay!”
“did he live?”
“i think so. the ghost is lurking outside max’s door,” she grins into the camera, watching the entity walk back and forth outside the room max is in.
“don’t come out yet.”
“not even a chance, mate.”
“okay, she’s gone,” she sighs. “i’m gonna log out and create an account on fortnite.”
“we’re not gonna play valorant?”
“okay, chat, we’re waiting for oscar to finish the tutorial,” she smiles. “we should be in our first game in a couple of minutes.”
user24: bro ur tutorial was horrendous
user25: i love watching people be bad at valorant
user26: shes so real for that though
user27: she’d play sage for sure
seb.v5: i can’t believe you got oscar to join you
user28: and logan 🤨
user17: outrageous that i’ve been begging the grid to join lando’s streams and here she comes casually getting them to play silly games
user3: real
user28: everyone say thank you (y/n)
blythe.yln: i can’t believe u didnt ask me to join u
blythe.yln: i’m the best at valorant
blythe.yln: i’m better than dalton
user29: YES BLYTHE SPEAK YOUR TRUTH
“so, what do i do again, dalton?” lando asks softly. “what’s the ‘e’ button do?”
“puts up a wall,” the younger kid says. “and then it heals you too, but damages other people. even your teammates.”
“who’s this eminem looking bro?” max asks, giggling slightly. “frank ocean, i saw on tiktok.”
user30: my roman empire is blythe being a pro valorant player but this is the first time her sister is trying the game
“well, i’m sorry for doing other things than playing valorant,” she jokes with a smile. “but, yes, guys! blythe plays valorant for a living which is exactly why we didn’t invite her to play.”
user31: blythe is a pro val player!!?!?!?
user31: since when??
blythe.yln: yeah guys follow my twitch, i’ll treat u better
“i’m going to ban you from my chat if you keep marketing, blythe,” she frowns, though a smile creeping up on her face. “where is dalton?”
blythe.yln: dalton is my valorant spawn… i taught him what he knows
user31: dalton to go pro in a couple years?
user32: omg that’s crazy
user1: the yln’s are gonna take over the valorant scene
user6: blythe getting a redbull gaming clutch would be to die for
“mate, dalton, what’s this girl in the yellow jacket do? she looks stylish,” oscar asks.
“she’s got a turret and grenades,” dalton answers simply.
“alright, how do i get her?”
“you gotta play the game.”
“oh, what? that’s so unfair.”
“yeah, i’m sure that sucks that you’ve got to play the game, oscar,” she says. “where is logan?”
“i’m sorry,” the sigh in logan’s sentence making her laugh. “i got stuck.”
“how?” oscar asks with a laugh. “they literally tell you what to do.”
“i couldn’t find the buttons they were asking me to press,” logan mumbles with a hint of disappointment.
“are you actually intellectually hindered, mate?” she cries with a laugh, covering her eyes. “do you not frequent a laptop?”
“not really, no.”
“it shows,” oscar adds on.
blythe.yln: he’s gonna be shit
user5: so real i can alr see it
user11: dude they’re gonna be screaming at each other soon
“let’s do a quick test game,” dalton mutters as logan’s in-game name pops up on the screen. “just a short game.”
“with real people?” lando asks in a small voice. “that can trash talk me?”
“just trash talk them back, mate,” max answers. “easy.”
“just find their ip address and hit them,” logan suggests. “that’s easier.”
“what?”
“don’t pretend like you wouldn’t do it too, (y/n)!” logan whines. “come on, let’s start!”
“how do i defuse the spike?” max screams, looking at the ground as he runs around. “where even is it?”
“your left,” dalton says. “keep walking.”
blythe is now sat next to her older sister, leg propped up in her seat as she watches the screen.
“okay, okay, go to the right and look right here,” blythe mutters, pointing at the screen. “and then aim right here,” she adjusts her sister’s mouse, “when you see somebody, shoot.”
“that’s not fair. (y/n)’s literally got a pro helping her with the game,��� oscar complains.
“you’re dead. literally doesn’t matter if someone’s helping you or not,” logan states. “we suck, man.”
“okay, i figured out how to defuse the bomb,” max says softly. “what now?”
“learn to play better,” blythe says loud enough for the microphone to pick up her voice. “i’ll teach you guys.”
“thank you for tuning into my stream,” she grins with a clap. “i appreciate all of the support and teaching me how to play the games. and roasting me.”
logansargeant: bro we suck
seb.v5: should stick to racing and leave gaming to blythe and dalton
“i read each and every comment you guys sent in the chat and they’re all very endearing. except yours, seb,” she stares into the camera with a stern expression, “yours were just outright unnecessary and kinda mean.”
oscahpastry: start a podcast next
maxverstappen1: i wanna be first guest
user16: please stream regularly!!
user10: make oscar play lethal company or i’ll cry
oscahpastry: stop giving her ideas
user21: when r u streaming again
“i will try to stream in a couple of days, after my shoots and marketing stuff with the team,” she grins. “thank you for watching me scream for 4 hours. catch you guys soon. stay kind and stay safe.”
user2: i’ll miss you 🫶🏼
taglist: @wcnorris @treehouse-mouse @laura-naruto-fan1998 @mindless-rock @inejismywife @vellicora @leilanixx @meadhgbcavanagh @2bormaybenot @ironmaiden1313 @angsthology @cherry-piee @christianpulisic10 @elliegrey2803 @cashtons-wife @love4lando @sadg3 @bborra @a10vely-yutazen @mellowarcadefun
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OK so like, there this challenge, it like the kid tells their mom to shut up, and see what the dad does
And I was wondering if you could do
Toji, Gojo, Geto, Choso, Sukuna, and Nanami
Hopefully it's a good idea thank you!
“MOM SHUT UP!”
— gojo, nanami, sukuna, and geto react to your kid telling you to shut up
a/n: oop, i didn’t notice the challenge part; also, I didn’t write one for toji or choso sorry 🥲
GOJO SATORU:
your 7 year old son —unfortunately or fortunately, you have yet to decide— has inherited a lot of his dad’s traits, including his unbelievably loud mouth that has no filter.
so today, the little fucker, who you’ve carried in your womb for 9 months and have to endure his antics now, told you to shut up when you told him to stop playing and go to sleep.
just as you were about to throw your slipper at his head, your husband takes a hold of your hand. he smiles, “let me take care of this.”
you reluctantly put down your weapon and watch your husband approach your son.
“hey champ,” satoru says and his son glares up at him. satoru’s smile tightens as he thinks of throwing his son out of the window right then and there.
is this how you feel dealing with both of them?
“I heard that you told your mom to shut up; is that true?” satoru asks and somehow his son is finally realizing what he did as his eyes are drowned in guilt.
satoru hears a ‘game over!’ come from his son’s pc and his son frowns, “dad! I lost because of you!”
“maybe if you were nice to your mom then I wouldn’t have to be here, would I?”
“also,” he says, leaning on the chair to see his son’s score, “it looks more like a skill issue on your part.”
the kid is offended as he fills his fist with cursed energy and satoru is just as ready to fight with his son.
soon, they each get a slipper thrown at their heads. satoru falls to the ground whining about how he was only trying to help, but your son looks at you, rubbing his head.
you don’t speak and merely look at him. he gets off his chair and walks to you.
“sorry, mom,” he whispers.
your son, further saddened by your lack of response, hugs you and apologizes again. you feel his tears stain your pants and you sigh as your fingers card through your son’s messy hair.
“just don’t do it again.”
he nods and a small smile takes over your face.
“I still think it’s a skill issue,” your husband says before being taken out by another slipper.
NANAMI KENTO:
“mom just shut up!” your 6 year old daughter says as she hears you ramble over the phone while she was drawing.
your eyes widen and you hang up on your friend before getting up to spank your audacious daughter, “oh I know you ain’t taking to me—“
your husband says your daughter’s name disapprovingly making you stop in your track and her to look up at him with surprise and sadness.
“that’s not something you say to your mother,” he starts off and shakes his head, his disappointment basically radiating at this point, “you have to be respectful to her and appreciate her.”
your daughter looks at the ground as tears swell up in her eyes.
kento continues, “and if you were bothered by the noise,” he places his hand on her head and his voice softens, “then you should’ve asked politely if your mom can talk in a lower voice or you could’ve moved rooms, right?”
she nods, trembling and crying silently.
she looks at you, before running to you and jumping into your arms and apologizing repeatedly for what she did and that she would be a good girl from now on.
you cradle her in your embrace and pat her back to calm her down.
your husband approaches you both and presses a kiss on your forehead and hers. kento whispers in your ear as he looks at his daughter, “she dodged a bullet, huh love?”
you roll your eyes and shove him lightly and he merely presses a kiss to your shoulder with a smile.
for some reason, your daughter places her hand on his face and gently pushes him away.
“mommy is mine,” she softly says and hopes her father is not bothered by her claim.
he merely furrows his eyebrows, “but she is my wife.”
his daughter smiles mischievously and shrugs and nanami realizes just how much a of a devil his sweet daughter can be.
RYOMEN SUKUNA:
being the son of ryomen sukuna, your son has been raised to be befitting of the title of a king and that includes his speech mannerism that he picked from his dad.
somehow, that further irritates you as your son says, “silence, mother!”
it reminds you of a certain king of curses who says, “silence, woman.”
however, the king of curses does not escape your wrath when he says those words and neither will your son.
“oho? is ‘silence’ something you say to your mother, s/n?” you inquire and your son narrows his eyes in an attempt to intimidate you, but it only causes your cursed energy to increase which makes the boy gulp slightly.
your husband enters the room and is confused by the display: your son looking at you scared and you looking close to smacking the hell out of the kid, “what’s the matter?”
you look at sukuna, “oh I don’t know; why don’t you tell him s/n?”
your son looks at you then at his dad. “…I told mother to be silent,” he says shamefully.
your husband barks out a laugh but is quickly punched in the stomach by you. he falls to the ground and glares at you, “why you!” he grumbles.
“sukuna-sama, is telling your mother to be silent a good thing?” you emphasize the honorific and your husband stands up and shakes his head.
“no,” he grumbles and you nod, looking at your son.
your son frowns and walks to you then bows slightly, “apologies mother, it’s my mistake.”
you sigh and gently flick his forehead, “I am your mother; don’t bow to me silly.”
your son looks up to you, surprised and smiles, nodding before hugging you.
meanwhile, sukuna is there, complaining about how you dared to punch the king of curses.
GETO SUGURU:
your 5 year old daughter had told you to shut up while she was watching her favorite show and you have started ignoring her ever since.
whenever she would try to talk to you, you would turn away from her and walk away. she didn’t know or rather realize what she did wrong so she went to her daddy to ask for help.
“daddy, I don’t know why mommy is ignoring me!” she tells him seriously and he looks at her nodding while munching on his cereal.
“did you do anything wrong that made mommy mad?” he asks and smiles at how she scratches her head as she thinks. after a while, she shakes her head clueless.
he hums before looking at her, “well, a little birdie told me that you told her to shut up; is that true?”
she tilts her head, “how did the birdie know?”
“I will tell you later, but what’s important now: is it a good thing to tell mommy to shut up?” he inquires, raising and eyebrow at his daughter who plays with the hem of her shirt as she mumbles a small ‘no…’
“there you go, now you know why mommy won’t talk to you,” he winks, “now go apologize; good people apologize when they do something wrong, right?”
she nods with a small smile and he ruffles her hair, “good girl.”
later on, after everything is resolved, she is nestled in your lap and suguru is beside you with his arm around you as she asks, “daddy, how did the little birdie know?”
he smiles and he doesn’t tell her that his cute wife, you, was huffing about how rude her daughter can be and how he had to hug her and pepper her with kisses to calm her down.
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do not copy or plagiarize or i will suplex you
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what if dogday got into baking? , maybe you could try writing about him learning to baking stuff?
✧. ┊𝑊ℎ𝑖𝑠𝑘𝑒𝑑 𝛢𝑤𝑎𝑦
A/N: This was such a cute ask! I hope you enjoy! This ones short but still sweet!^^
Making sure Dogday was out of the kitchen was your top priority during mealtimes.
You know he means well, but you didn't want to run the risk of him breaking more plates or setting anything on fire… again.
You sat outside on the grass, enjoying the fresh air and nice breeze on your skin.
Dogday decided to sleep in, Poppy and Kissy wandered around looking for flowers which meant you had some much needed alone time.
The sound of pots crashing made you jump to your feet. Quickly you rushed inside and called out for Dogday.
“I-In here.”
You rush to the kitchen, stopping at the doorway as you take in the mess.
“Angel, before you get mad-”
You couldn't help but laugh.
Dogday stares at you with a confused expression and tilts his head.
As much as you wanted to, you couldn't be mad when he's covered in flour and holding a tiny whisk in his giant hand.
“Anddd what have you been up to?”
You snort as you get closer and dust some flour off of his nose.
“Angel I'm sorry, I'll help you clean up…”
He sighs in defeat.
You noticed he was standing oddly and quickly tickled his sides, making him squirm in the process.
“Dogday what's this?”
You hold up the baking book you never remembered buying.
It was slightly sticky from the batter but the pages were still very noticeably new.
“it gets boring here… And wanted to learn something that might lessen some of your responsibilities…”
He looks like a puppy that's being reprimanded. You couldn't help but chuckle.
Adorable.
You thought to yourself.
“Dogday I'm not mad I'm happy you're trying something new! A $20 book on the other hand-”
“$20?!”
“Tell you what,”
You skim through the pages while he curiously hovers over you. You slam your finger down on the page that had the most delicious looking cake in the photo reference.
“Make this and if it tastes good then I'll let you off the hook!”
Your proposition seemed to have made him perk up.
He grabs onto his tail to avoid any more damage to the kitchen.
“Alright deal! Let me work my magic.”
He points the comically tiny whisk at you and you raise your hands in defeat.
“Alright alright, I'll be on standby.”
You joke as you leave him to his experiment.
Throughout his time in the kitchen, the sound of pots and spoons falling and the smell of something burning made you question if letting him bake would lead to a house fire.
“Sunshine, how's it go-”
You look around the kitchen, your mouth agape.
“You act like I don't clean up after myself.”
He shakes his head in disbelief with the little faith you had in him.
The kitchen was almost spotless, impressive was an understatement.
He motions towards the cake he had made and calls out to the others for a taste.
“Wow it smells great Dogday!”
Poppy exclaims as soon as she and Kissy walk in.
“It does smell pretty promising!”
You agree before taking a seat at the table.
Once everyone is served and seated, you begin to inspect the cake. It seemed well made and you were eager to taste it now.
“Alright on the count of 3!”
You say as you four hold a piece of cake near your mouths.
“3,2,1!”
“...”
“It's… good?”
Your words instantly shift his mood.
His tail begins to wag as he continues to eat his slice.
“Does this mean I can help out in the kitchen?!”
Dogday’s eyes light up. Seeing him heartbroken after such an accomplishment would crush you.
“Fine, if you can keep the mess to a minimum.”
“Deal!”
A/N: I got my PC back!! this is my first post using my pc and wow is it 10 times easier than on my phone. I've been a bit busy recently but keep sending in requests! I'm still working on a few projects and will post them hopefully soon! If you read this far dont forget to reblog and like <3
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