#hi my dads a serial killer-

[the-inner-musings-of-a-worm]

hear me out another kevin day SNL skit: he’s pretending to be wymack picking out the lineup for the foxes and there’s a row of players that want to be on the team. most of the players are normal, they have impressive stats, but some are just batshit crazy. kevin only accepts the crazy ones

player 1: hi, i was captain of my exy team for 2 years and we won our state tournament

kevin as wymack: sorry, i don’t think you have the passion

player 2: i’ve lived in a dumpster for the past 3 years and i only know about exy because of romance novels

kevin: welcome to the team!

player 3: i’ve been playing exy since i was 1 years old-

kevin: boring, next

player 4: setting fires makes me feel warm inside

kevin: good thing carolina’s warm too. congrats you’re a fox

basically making fun of wymacks insane selection process

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

demanding a series in the same vein (heh, vein) as Dexter/Hannibal wherein a prolific serial killer plays cat & mouse with the police--except the serial killer in question is a preteen schoolgirl. this would make for compelling television due to the fact that middle school frequently causes girls to become deranged, and more media should reflect this

[skyblueartt]

Waiter! Waiter! More “strained, layered, and complex fictional father and son relationships” please!

[winepresswrath]

seeing nicki get dragged through the mud on account of fandom drama that isn't even about him honestly feels right. very armand core.

[nixie-deangel]

If you’re still taking the emojis! 💔💐🍼

I absolutely am! And will be taking them all weekend!

💔 icemav break up / icedad

Tom can't help but stare at where Bradley had finally passed out, after spending most of the evening crying out his hurt and frustration at his mom and Mav. Bringing his hand up, he rubs at his jaw and just watches his kid a moment more before he pushes up, moving to close the door partly and turning on his heel to shuffle quietly down the hall to the kitchen. Grabbing the cordless, he drops down onto a seat at the small breakfast table and stares at it. He knows he needs to call the others, Sarah and Slider at the very least to let them know what's happening. That of everyone, they deserve to know that he's broken up with Mav, that Bradley will be living with him for the rest of his senior year. That they need to know what Carole said, what she, and Mav, tried to do to Bradley.

💐 serial killer Jake - hangster

"So, you ever gonna let me help you out, honey?" Jake asks as he pulls out his wallet and a few hundreds to stuff into Bradley's personal tip jar. Bradley snorts, sending a pointed look to the money Jake just dropped. "Aren't you already doing that, sweetheart?" Opening his mouth, Jake narrows his eyes as his lips twist into a pout because technically Bradley is right. Even if it's not nearly enough of what Jake wants to be able to do for Bradley. To be able to give to him.

🍼 non navy bradley/fighter pilot jake as parents - hangster

"What are you saying?" "That I wouldn't mind if we had a second or even third kid," Bradley repeats, sending Jake a half amused look before he goes back to cutting the potatoes to add to the pot roast he's about to put in the oven. "I know you've always wanted a big family, Jake, " he continues. "And I've mentioned once or twice how lonely growing up an only child could be and I don't want that for Emmy. I-I want her to grow up with siblings and with family and to know without a doubt she's surrounded by love." He pauses to send Jake another grin, "'sides, I wouldn't mind having a little Seresin to call ours." "Bradshaw," Jake croaks out, eyes well with tears as he stares at his partner, his husband in all but title. "It'd be Bradshaw. Janie's got the Seresin name covered. We've got the Bradshaw one."

Make Nixie Write This Weekend!

[dayurno]

omg reverse riko au is making me feel so ill..... please let us know if you have any more thoughts abt riko kayleigh and kevin legend.....

I DO my idea is that its around the same age kevin and riko met in canon so tetsuji kicks the bucket when riko is 7/8 and riko is (very forcibly) removed from the nest and sidelined to kayleigh as a new moriyama asset from the main branch takes over the nest. riko struggles a lot with the change because he is very young and very scared and he’s used to horrible things at tetsuji’s hand, which means that he doesn’t trust kayleigh and finds kevin entirely too weird. it’s honestly really cute because i think at this point obviously 7 year old kevin wants to befriend him but riko is such an anxious ball of anger that most of their interactions are like

baby riko: what do you WANT from me. go AWAY!!!! NOW

baby kevin: (heavy irish accent) nothing i think. do you want a bite of my sandwich?

anyway i think riko and kayleigh do get along but he never really considers her his mother or even godmother, for a long time he thinks of her as his Benefactor until the child therapy starts hitting and she becomes Aunt Kayleigh and then after a few more years he can be loosely convinced to refer to her as auntie once or twice a year. his second son syndrome never really leaves him; in the upcoming years riko struggles with the idea that he’s anything But an add-on to the days and still overworks himself to death trying to be acknowledged by kengo, but it’s leaps better just from being outside the nest and having people to look out for him

riko and kevin have some rough patches, especially during riko’s first years with the days. because kevin is an easy target and riko is afraid of kayleigh he ends up letting a lot of that anger out on kevin, though obviously at this point they are children and riko’s anger manifests in some mild bullying and name calling. i think kevin doesn’t even understand it most of the time 😭 riko has been around grown ups his entire life so his adult level insults make no sense to kevin’s seven year old mind. nevertheless after kayleigh tells him to stop picking on kevin riko does respect it (first out of fear, then later because they actually get along) and they go on to become brothers with only a slight tendency towards antagonism. riko’s jealousy of kevin is still a big part of their relationship and i think even more so when college applications roll around, and he’s even more worried when wymack comes into the picture, but it never culminates into anything as horrible as hand breaking because riko has an actual outlet and a support system :) it’s mostly a yelling match that eventually turns to getting scolded by kayleigh for acting like barbarians

[mcalhenwrites]

Irving and Albie :D

[just-spacetrash]

😵

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

Me, aged 5. Spoken to my extremely Catholic grandmother, matriarch of the family, who had crosses and pictures of saints hanging in every room of the house: [little, uncannily-enunciated voice] “Grandma, when your church gets destroyed in Armageddon, you can come to our kingdom hall!”

[zerothisnero]

Funny evil reptile and butler post idk I'm going to throw myself at a wall

[talentforlying]

standing before you today to say that the jld writers' choice to assign constantine the house of mystery, aka the one that belonged to cain, was a WILD move and SHOCKINGLY emblematic of a lot of who he is as an archetype, particularly in relation to his family: as betrayer son and brother, defiler of his father's house, favorer of bloodless sacrifice yet steeped in the opposite, the first killer (or so he believes), cardinal sins of pride and envy, murderer of those he claims to love, liar to the face of god. cursed forever to walk alone, city-coded, shielded from vengeance but unable to shield those around him, slaking the earth in blood where he only ever wanted to sow, an eternity of regret is not enough to repair the damage he has done.

[spring-lxcked]

I mentioned in a joke post generally believing that Spring Bonnie's programming is inactive post-springlock incident, so of course that means an entire headcanon post.

Spring Bonnie was not an intelligent animatronic. He was only ever created to speak pre-recorded lines and sing and dance on-stage, alongside being worn. (Of course, there was an earlier prototype, pre-springlock suits, but he's not a part of this specific headcanon). However, William committed atrocities both while wearing and while nearby the suit, many of which involved intentionally harvesting remnant. Between unintentional exposure to remnant and pure, unbridled agony, Spring Bonnie does become, to some degree, sentient. In springlock mode, he is entirely unable to do anything, his programming overridden. Outside of that, he is initially not dangerous. The springlock incident had nothing to do with Spring Bonnie himself. It was purely William's own mistakes. In the years trapped in the backroom, the suit rots and Bonnie loses all power. Still, part of William's disorientation comes from the remains of that remnant and agony. What had made Spring Bonnie sentient is still present, still angry, and that anger intermixes with William's own. Theoretically, if you could repair the suit enough and power it, Spring Bonnie would come back on. In reality, though, this alone couldn't stop William and, if anything, would only make Springtrap more erratic and unpredictable. On a similar note, I recognize that fanon often suggests that Spring Bonnie's programming is what causes Springtrap to follow audio lures. While I actually like this theory, this is not the case for my Springtrap. Rage (both from William and the agony) + the disorientation of 30 years trapped in darkness, fading in and out of reality, makes him prone to following nearly anything he hears. And let's be honest, hearing the sound of his previously usual targets is distracting to say the least. While he gradually becomes less and less disoriented with time, he's never fully immune from a desperate need to kill.

[merriblu]

I really love watching those old 1940 Disney films. They are just so god awful that it circles-round to being an absolute delight to hate. 1940s Swiss Family Robinson was our poison for this evening. An absolute treasure of a movie. “The audacity” and “fucking MEN” were the main reactions.

1.5/10 would see again with alcohol.

[kindheartedgummybears]

Was listening to talking in your sleep and knew I had to draw...

Her😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰🥰

It's nothing but a rough stretch and I didn't put too much thought into the coloring but I'm in love😍🥰

[nixie-deangel]

@weepinggoateesoul who asked for the following:

🍼 non navy bradley/fighter pilot jake as parents - hangster

“You sure you wanna do that?” Jake asks, again, but he needs to be sure. Needs to know this is what Bradley wants and not what he thinks Jake wants. The man just barely turns to grin at him before going back to folding Emmy’s never ending supply of clothes as he answers, “I’m sure. June is sure. Emmy is all of three years old, but if she really understood what it meant, I’m confident that she would also be sure about us moving to San Diego to be closer to you when you’re in Lemoore.”

🍷 Jake's family causes the hangster break up

Bradley waits till Nat runs interference with Javy before he attempts to approach Jake. “Hey, hey,” he calls awkwardly before clearing his throat. “Bradshaw,” Jake calls, cold and even as he turns attention back to the dart board.  “I, I wanted to apologize,” he says quietly as takes half a step closer. “About what I said about you leading people to their deaths.” He pauses and takes a breath and pushes on. “I didn’t mean it. Was just being an asshole. I know when things are truly on the line, you’ll do right by your team.”

💐 serial killer Jake - hangster

Bradley dreads making the call to the collector, once again saying he’d be a few days late on his payment but he knows he needs to. That he has too. Lifting his hands up, he rubs at his shoulders as he stares down, gaze hard, at his prepaid.

🥰 Kinktober - Virgin Bradley

“Honey,” Jake calls quietly as he reaches his hand out, gently grasping Bradley’s chin to make him look at him as he continues on, “We ain’t gotta do a thing you don’t wanna, darlin’,” he promises. “You wanna cuddle all night, fine be me. Want me to take you out like the lady you are and sweep you off your feet, then that’s what we’ll do. I’ll prove how much I want you. More than just sex, honey. I don’t mind pumpin’ the breaks till you’re comfortable.”

Make Nixie Write!

[theprofessionalpromptmaker]

“I hugged my dad for the first time in my life and I just overheard him asking his roommate if I’ve been doing anything suspicious. Apparently he thinks I’m plotting his murder now. Good. I like keeping him on his toes.”