#hes the oldest young person ive ever met

[hold-me-like-a-tourniquet]

chat i fear im down bad

[togrowoldinv]

Cookie Monster

Natasha Romanoff x Female Reader

Morning snuggles with the family

Note: This is soft soft soft mama Nat. Like so soft it’s tooth rotting. Enjoy!

Natasha Romanoff Masterlist 1, Natasha Romanoff Masterlist 2, Main Masterlist

All of your life you have never considered yourself a morning person. You hated the idea of waking up and having to face the world in whatever capacity was necessary that day. It made you grumpy and you avoided it at all costs.

That changed when you met Natasha.

Nat is an early riser, always has been. You’re sure it’s from her being trained at such a young age to skip sleep and focus on her goals. But even when she got older and had her freedom, she still wanted to wake up and get her day started.

It started out simply with you wanting to make sure you got to snuggle with her before missions, but slowly and surely, soon enough you found yourself wanting to get up with her every day.

Nat indulges in snuggles and not actually getting out of bed early on the weekend. That is always your favorite time with her.

It’s no different even now as you have two little children who run into your room every morning.

You hear little feet now and brace yourselves for impact.

“Mama!” your oldest is not quiet as she runs into the room and jumps onto the bed.

“Hey baby,” Natasha greets her easily, slipping a hand over her shoulder to pull her in for a long hug. You place a hand over her back and kiss her forehead as she closes her eyes at feeling the warmth of Natasha. It’s not just you who feels instantly comforted in her embrace, and that makes your heart soar.

A few minutes later, your young son finally comes trudging through the door. But he doesn’t look as happy as his sibling. He’s more like you, not a morning person.

“Good morning, buddy. Come here,” you say when he reaches the bed with his arms out. You reach over Natasha and Ali to lift him up. Ali stirs back awake in Natasha’s arms. You kiss his head and he still doesn’t smile. He reminds you of so much of yourself.

“Hi Ivan,” Ali greets her little brother.

He buries his face in your neck and mumbles something that you don’t quite hear. But Natasha hears it.

“Your tummy hurts?” She clarifies with him. He nods against you.

“Oh, I’m sorry, sweetheart,” you hold him a little closer. He turns his head to look at Nat.

“You know, I bet it was all of those cookies you three ate last night,” Natasha says with a smirk.

Ali lifts her head up off of Nat and looks at you with wide eyes. Ivan perks up too. You and the kids had some cookies after dinner last night while Nat was out with Yelena. And you’ve been caught red handed.

“We don’t know of any cookie eating. That’s crazy dude,” you say, holding back a laugh.

“Hmm, sure you don’t,” Nat says. “But I think the Cookie Monster might be in Iv’s belly.”

Everyone starts giggling at her statement.

“We had cookies, Mama,” your ever so honest daughter admits.

Natasha smiles at her honesty. “Were they yummy?”

“Super duper,” Ivan actually answers. He’s feeling better.

“It was our best work,” you add and then ask her, “How did you know?”

“Mama knows everything,” she says.

You can’t help but smile at that. And the four of you enjoy a nice, warm snuggle pile before you start your day.

Mornings are now your favorite. All thanks to Natasha, your wonderful wife.

Tag List: @gracebutnotgraceful @i-wished-for-you-too @belovaskitkat @be-missed @likefirenrain @hehehehannahthings @mythosphere-x @readings-stuff @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @madamevirgo @milfloverslut @mrswidowjohansson @alotofpockets @ggrangerdanger @maia-lightwoood @xxromanoffxx @peanutbutterprincess @karmasgxrl @picnicmic @wandaslittlewhore @exhaustedfangirl @when-wolves-howl @natashalovers @sammi1642 @the-night-owl-blr @strangegardentaco @avatarsnips @romanoffswoman @natashasilverfox @imthenatynat @rach2602 @cordyandbilliehavemyheart @lovelyy-moonlight @huitzilinthebudgie3 @juicyy444 @youralphawolf72 @btay3115 @red1culous @lenam07 @randomwriter1021 @rightwereyouleftme @natismywife @dumb-fawkin-bitch @natashaswife4125 @karsonromanoff @bookfrog242 @theprinceofmarvel

[heecyon]

𝐂𝐔𝐏𝐈𝐃, 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐀 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄; 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆—chapter one

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄: soulmates au! greek gods au! demigods au! enemies to lovers au! fluff! angst!

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: son of hades!park jay x daughter of aphrodite!reader

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: explicit language, mentions of sexual harassment (no sexual abuse), nudity, y/n is a selfish brat, angst, mentions of food, and suggestive (no smut)

featuring. ive wonyoung, txt beomgyu, enhypen jake and enhypen sunghoon

mini series masterlist

chapter one — chapter two — finale

taglist: @sunshine-skz @sun6ooi @honeyevelvet @mei-vly @acciomylove @baekhyunstruly @papiibuprofen

People always tried to look for something more, except for Y/N’s pretty face.

Choi Y/N, daughter of Aphrodite. She obviously wasn’t the only child of the precious goddess, there was Wonyoung, Beomgyu, and Sunghoon. A very visual siblings group if you told me about it.

The young girl was now tapping her feet on the floor, nervousness taking over her body, her only way to relax was to let the wooden floor suffer for a little while. “You are gonna make a hole if you keep doing that.” Wonyoung said with a smirk on her lips.

“Sorry, just stressing.” the girl soon sat up straight, her feet slowing down their pace until they fully calmed down. She scratched her forehead when a sudden itch started to attack that place.

“I wonder who my soulmate is?”

“I wonder that as well.” Y/N responded.

“There you are, we’ve been looking for you guys.” A male voice became present near the girls, two males sat beside them. Sunghoon and Beomgyu, the other kids of Aphrodite, very famous around the school. “I’m really excited to know who your soulmates are.”

Y/N scoffed, a small smile on her lips. “Is that why you are here?”

Sunghoon looked at Beomgyu before letting out a snort.

“Isn’t that obvious?”

The oldest girl of the group soon realized that she had pending homework for tomorrow and Mrs. Kang wasn’t going to be happy if she didn’t turn it in. She was really lazy to do it after the ceremony, after all, she had other plans, her schedule would be really tight for a few hours.

She bit her lower lip just by the thought of it, she had a million men of her interest under her spell, just by using her beauty and charm she could get whatever she wanted, that was one of the many benefits of getting the powers of Aphrodite.

Y/N turned around to see Jake Shim, son of Demeter.

He was a really sweet guy, also in her class, he always sat in front of her, even though he was sweet and kind, he wouldn’t fall for her pleas that easily. So, as if she was snapping her fingers, she saw him straight in the eyes and got deep into his soul, letting her enchanting beauty manipulate his mind.

Jake’s eyes had a pink glow around his iris, meaning that her spell had worked perfectly. “Jakey, I want you to know that you are the most amazing person I’ve ever met and that it would be so sweet of you to make my greek mythology homework for tomorrow.” Shim had a smile creep from each corner of his lips, he couldn’t say no, everyone knew that after Choi’s enchantment, he wouldn’t be able to hold back.

“It would be an honor to do such an easy task, my dear.” Y/N just smiled, rolling her eyes as she went back to her original position, turning her back from the enchanted boy.

“You are wicked!” Wonyoung hit her older sister’s shoulder.

The chattering in the gym became nonexistent when the Principal, Mrs. Oh, finally stood up at the center of the court, she cleared her throat, the sound echoing through the wall because of the microphone in front of her.

“Good afternoon, students. It is good to have you back for another school year, as you know, it’s a very important tradition to let Eros tell us who our soulmate is, it may seem at first that you have very different concepts and personalities, but with time you will learn to be comfortable with each other.”

“Let the ceremony, start.” Those were her last words before Mr. Kim, walked in front of the room with well-decorated letters, each one of them decorated depending on the personality of the person’s soulmate.

“Jang Wonyoung.” The girl was the first one to be called, letting her feet guide her towards her teacher, she grabbed the letter and as she went back to her seat, she closed her eyes, shaking her head.

Y/N looked at her, her expression was far more than confused.

“Aren’t you gonna read it?” She asked.

“No. I’m way too nervous.”

A bunch of names escaped their teacher’s mouth, but the young Choi, couldn’t hear her name at all, she was still not called. That made her a little bit excited, for her, if she was one of the last ones that could mean that she would get the best soulmate ever.

“Choi Y/N.” The girl jumped on her feet, she accommodated her dark plaid skirt, walking down to her professor, coloured details forming on her cheeks out of excitement, she grabbed the letter, noticing that this one was plain black, lace decorating the corners of the paper.

She walked back to her place, curiosity taking over.

Y/N decided to open the piece of paper, she was determined to know who was her possible lover, her fingers trailed the black paper, gold cursive letters pasted in it.

Such a precious detail, she thought.

But what wasn’t precious was the actual name itself written on that paper.

“The hell?!” Most people in the gym heard her desperate and shocked shout.

It had to be a prank, she was convinced that it was a prank.

“What happened?” Beomgyu asked as he got close to her, but then snorted by seeing the name on his sister’s letter. “Your soulmate is that kid from the underworld?” He chuckled, giving a sign to his siblings for them to see what was causing such a scandal…

I can tell you that they all had the same reaction as Beomgyu, they all snorted.

Park Jongseong was more than furious, he was raging.

He thought he was an idiot by just thinking that his crush, Minki, would appear in his letter, but the boy was more than wrong.

Jay walked down the woods, the exact woods that were just behind the gigantic buildings that people called school. He wondered, what had he done to deserve such a person, he wasn’t an evil person, he was just following his father’s steps, just like the rest of his brothers. His father was never a villain, even though at first glance, people didn’t think that.

The boy kept walking through the deep of the forest, the sound of a body of water becoming closer. He was pretty sure that there was a river close by, as he saw that the path was becoming steep and full of white rocks just like chalk.

He followed the path of rocks, and it felt like he was running down a hill. Jay watched his steps closely, trying to be careful and beware of any dangers.

The view was more than gorgeous, pine trees surrounded the place, the water of the lake was more than crystalline, green grass sticking out of the pointy and chalky rocks. What a place to relax, he thought.

It had been hours since the ceremony had finished, and he thought that he was the only one not looking for his respective roommate, but he was wrong, there was a baby blue checkered backpack right close to the start of the lake, laying on the rocks.

He wasn’t alone at all…

What was more curious, was the pair of clothes neatly folded beside the backpack, including a pair of sneakers.

Shoot! I should turn around.

That’s what his mind was trying to scream at him.

Jay heard the sound of splashes close to him.

There was indeed someone skinny dipping at the lake, she was probably trying to follow her mother’s steps, just like Aphrodite, being born naked at coming to land from a body of water.

“Is it you, Sung-Ho?” The female asked.

“I know there’s someone there. You can come out now, I don’t bite.” Y/N giggled.

Jay felt like he was officially screwed, he couldn’t look at her like that.

But he still turned back around facing her, the lower part of her body submerged in the water, while her upper body was covered by her long dark hair, her back facing her.

“Sorry Choi, I was just walking around.” The boy said.

“Jay.” She whispered, now submerging almost all her body into the water, the parts of her clavicle to her head being the only thing visible.

“Were you waiting for someone? Sung-Ho?” Jay asked mischievously, it was his way of mocking her, he loved seeing her enraged, it gave him satisfaction. Just knowing that he was getting on her skin was really fun.

“It’s none of your business.” “That’s what you always say.”

This girl could feel the anger running down her veins, she hated Jay, she truly did and people always thought that their eternal rivalry was something really absurd, and maybe it was, but they didn’t know the deep of it.

“I can’t believe you are doing this!” Wonyoung saw how her sister slid a pastel pink letter inside one of the school’s lockers.

A year ago, sixteen, nearly seventeen-year-old Y/N, was trying to make her plan work.

She had never in her life experienced such a deep crush on someone, but Park Jongseong was the exception, not knowing exactly what she saw in him, but she wanted him to be hers, all for herself, although it sounded more than petty.

“Shush!” Y/N told her younger sister. She had poured her heart out on that letter, she truly did. Y/N expected to get a response soon, but it never came.

She played with the tips of her hair, curling it with her index finger, rounds, and rounds of curling. The girl felt pity for herself, how could someone as Jay, be her soulmate. He was a heartbreaker, she always believed that.

“You shouldn��t be caring about my personal life that much, you look like a creep when you do that!” Her legs commanded her to walk backwards, far away from the boy, where she felt more secure.

“I guess now I’m a creep.”

They both moved back to the building, looking for their respective rooms.

Jay was pretty much annoyed by her just walking close to him, what else could she do?

It was like Jay wanted her to disappear.

Sounds harsh, but right then that was very true.

Jay wished he was sucked by hell right there and then, when they both stopped in front of the same door.

[niightbiite]

Screenshotted post by @cuppimagines

So ive had that imagine [link 2 said post] sitting in my drafts as a idea to do for awhile now.... n ive done it!!!

And in the process came up with!!! Character Lore. Kinda. Still poking at it but its pretty fun i think!!! [Lore n bonus pics under the cut]

Me trying to figure out designs + dark wizard trans. Why does he have a tenta dick? A dark spell he did had the (accidental) side effect of giving him one (and also changing a good like 50% of his anatomy into something a little more monsterous but shhhhh we're not talking about that), but honestly he'd been wanting one Anyways, AND the spell went off correctly, so he 100% won that gamble.

(HI soooo this backstory thing ended up a LOT longer than i initally expected. Have fun reading lmao)

Sooo the relationship between these two is that theyre recently reconnected childhood penpals!!! They live on two different, yet similar worlds, and those worlds have some hidden connections! One day, a hot summer day, young lil baby Cafe (the person who is Not a wizard) found one of those connections, in the woods behind their family's home. Being a weird little child (as all children are), they decided to send a letter through it.

On the other side of that connection, a few days later, DW (Dark Wizard) found that letter (and the connection) in the woods surrounding his grandfather's home, and also being a weird little child, sent a letter back through. Thus! A wonderful summer friendship was struck up between the two, and lasted for years.

Unfortunately, somewhere around the middle of highschool, DW one day simply stopped responding. Cafe held out hope for months, but soon years had passed, and they simply had to move on. Life waited for no one, and they had college to get to.

The reason behind DW's sudden disappearance is the simply fact that his kindly grandfather, the one who he had been apprenticed to for the last 10+ years, and raised by even before that, was a dark magic user. And the particular kingdom they lived in hunted dark magic users. Also in his heyday, DW's grandfather was a real powerhouse, and caused Many issues (Likely also contributing to the banning of dark magic in that particular kingdom lmao).

So uh, yeah. DW had to go on the run.

Eventually he became a powerful enough tyrant/menancing cryptid mix that folks collectively decided to stop attempting to hunt him down (barring the occasional greedy/overly confident idiot), so DW came back to where his grandfather's house once stood, and settled down there. He never truly forgot about the connection, but it took a few months before he finally worked up the nerve to pen a letter to his oldest friend. Thankfully, DW happened to finally put his letter through just when Cafe happened to be visiting home for a break between semesters.

Even though they had long given up hope on ever hearing from DW again, Cafe still enjoyed hanging out in the woods to chill out, and checking the connection was practically a ritual at this point. Only this time, there was a letter in that script, one they never could have forgotten, even if they tried.

And basically after that its them catching up on each other's life in the past few years, and sending each other lil trinkets and pictures of themselves and whatnot. Then yearning. Lotsa yearning. DW and Cafe have lowkey had childhood crushes on one another all these years, but how the hell would you tell that to a someone you've never met in person, and cant actually ever meet in person??? Plus, Cafe has tried the dating scene, and never really found anyone that interests them (they are demisexual). DW has literally spent years on the run. So they (individually) just kinda. Stew in the Yearning-Pining soup.

Eventually magic fucky ducky shit happens and connections around the world turn into fully fledged, creature permissible portals. Its a lotta chaos, but thats not the point, cause now! Now they can finally fucking hug each other!!! And be incredibly gay horny young adults together.

I dont have anything vaugely thought about beyond that point, but just know they grow old and grey (...eventually. dark magic does some Weird Shit) together.

[ayo-cowbelly]

Anakin Everlasting

read on ao3 here

wowww look at me, posting writing two days in a row... here’s to being productive

again, blame discord. those amazing angst-lovers keep inspiring me to write and make everyone sad.

hope you enjoy!

p.s. pretty sure it's a thing that jedi live a lot longer than average people, usually over 100 years. so that's why that's in there.

***

Anakin wandered throughout the temple. Not the Coruscant one, as you might think- no, he was on Yavin IV now. Years ago, the Jedi had decided to expand and, seeing as there was an unused temple on a lush planet, a planet that was strong in the Force- it was perfect for a new branch of the Order.

He stared out at the greenery, so different from what he had been used to. Even though he came to this place almost 100 years ago, Anakin couldn't find himself getting fully adjusted to the new environment.

Anakin was now surrounded by greens, blues, and browns, so different from the golds and tans he was used to. Those colors represented everything he loved, everything he'd lost, and that which he could not bear to see taken from him. That was why, even if it was a bit uncomfortable, Anakin had moved to Yavin IV. He has lost so much- and Anakin had never been good with loss.

Yes, time heals all wounds, and of course he'd spent time meditating with Yoda, learning how to let go; Yoda was the only one who could even begin to understand Anakin's plight. Despite that, however, he still found his heart aching when he thought of his friends, his family, and how they had left him.

Padmé had been the first to go. She lived to be 97, and Anakin never stopped loving her. As she got older, Padmé had insisted on Anakin moving on, finding a younger person who could keep up with him, now that she was too frail to even leave the apartment most days. He knew she'd be gone soon, so he promised he'd try to find someone.

It was the only promise he'd ever broken.

"I don't want you to mourn the moment you spent with me for an eternity," She had told him.

Anakin, tears in his eyes, whispered back, "You are my eternity, Angel."

That, even 1000 years later, was still true. He loved her, as many others in the galaxy had loved someone; fiercely, eternally, even if she was dead. Anakin and Padmé had a love that would always be real, be true, as long as he kept her memory alive as he traveled across the stars.

Anakin cried for days when Ahsoka died.

His first and dearest Padawan lived to be 117, and she had been feisty until the very end (only Leia had been able to keep up with Ahsoka in that regard- oh, Force, Leia-)

When she left, laying in her bed with soft condolences and gentle teases and whispers of "Don't forget me, Skyguy," Anakin had thought that would break him, as he held her now-limp hand.

Obi-Wan was worse. Obi-Wan, the oldest family member he had left, had been gone for a long time. His brother had lived to be around 124 (or maybe not, Anakin seemed to be getting worse at keeping track of time the longer his life went on). Obi-Wan had lived a long life, a happy life; and when his time came, he learned enough of the Force that he could still visit Anakin, sometimes.

Every once and awhile, the two could talk (it used to be always, back when Obi lived- but Anakin would be the only one who would get an always). But it wasn't the same. Not even close.

He'd never admit it, but Anakin cried for over a week when Obi-Wan faded away. At that time, he was sure he would shatter; If Padmé hadn't broken him, if Ahsoka hadn't, surely his older brother would.

Obi's death had to be the worst, he was positive.

He was so, so wrong.

Nothing could compare to the pure heartbreak that came with the death of his children.

Luke, who was bright like sunshine and serene like water- and Leia, who was pure fire and somehow engulfed everyone she met. They were the brightest parts of Anakin's life, both in the Force and not. They were the best parts of him and Padmé, and he loved them so incredibly much. And, being twins, Luke and Leia spent almost every moment together since their birth. Throughout their lives, it was rare to see one without the other, for nobody was as closely intertwined as they; save for Anakin and Obi-Wan.

So, when Death came for his children, Anakin had to watch as they left together (there was no other way they could go). He'd had them for an amazing 156 years, years he would forever cherish.

Now he didn't have anyone. But somehow, he was still whole. He hadn't broken then, and he hadn't broken when his later Padawans had died (death was hard for Anakin to think about. Even though he somewhat feared it, he also wanted it, if it meant he could see his dearest ones again). But Anakin knew Death would never claim him, so he made the most out of his eternal life (but it was a half-life, for what is a life without love?)

He took other Padawans, trained other students and treated them as his own. Though he knew it was a bad idea, as nobody could stay forever, they became his family. Just as Ahsoka once had, when she'd stepped out of a shuttle on Christophsis.

Anakin also found he was good at storytelling. Every night, he made his way to the Crèche and regaled the younglings with his stories. The now-legends of a beautiful queen, a wise Jedi Master, a snarky Togruta (who had become a Master in her own right), an exasperated clone captain; and later the stories of a brave young man and his fiery twin sister, the smuggler she fell in love with, and how through it all were two droids who were the best of friends.

He told the next generations about their adventures, how they found joy while fighting a war, and he told them of how they had managed to discover and overthrow the Sith. He taught them how to find the Light, find love, even when hope seems lost.

The younglings loved the stories, ate them up until Anakin had no more, so he'd retell them again. He told them to the children, to the Padawans, to the Knights, and even the Masters (even if they were old, most had grown up hearing of Anakin's adventures). His only rule for those who heard the tales? Pass them on, so the memories stay alive.

He taught them a truth he had discovered: Nobody is ever really gone, as long as you keep on telling their stories.

Anakin forever would.

He made his way to a special room he had reserved for himself in the Temple, for as Grandmaster (now that Yoda was gone, Anakin had become the Grandmaster. Yoda's death, of all people... that had hit Anakin harder than he'd thought it would. When someone who seems to be forever dies, said death is shocking) he could do such things.

When he entered, he looked around the room. He surveyed the pictures and trinkets that lay there, waiting for him.

By Padmé's picture, there was the old Japor snippet necklace- along with a small flimsi paper flower he'd once made for her, onboard a Star Destroyer while thinking of how he missed her.

Beside Obi-Wan's, there was a lightsaber that hummed. It seemed to have a mind of its own now, and the buzzing got louder as Anakin approached- or rather, his own blade did. Just as their users were connected, these lightsabers were as well. There was also a small holo of Anakin and Obi-Wan on Cato Nemoidia, just after that "business" that Obi-Wan always said "didn't count". In the picture, Padawan Anakin is grinning widely, arm slung around a very disgruntled Obi-Wan's shoulders.

Next to Ahsoka's lay her two lightsabers and the golden headdress she'd worn since she was young. Anakin remembers how he'd gently lifted it off her head at the funeral, for if he couldn't keep his sister, his beloved Padawan, then he would keep this small part of her.

Alongside Luke and Leia's (their pictures were one and the same, since they almost never did something without the other) there were their own 'sabers and two drawings the twins made when they were toddlers. If Anakin remembered correctly (as time went on, he found it harder and harder to look at such things) the pictures depicted their family- which of course included Ahsoka, Obi-Wan, Rex, R2 and 3PO.

The two droids had been shut down long ago, finally going out of use just after Padmé's death.

The room housed other pictures, which showed the rest of Anakin's Padawans- including Ahsoka, there were six in total; But even though he kept all their lightsabers, he only had trinkets for two of them.

Uchani, who had been his second Padawan about 40 years after Ahsoka died, had been a quiet but strong Zeltron. She was a calm person, but there was spunk in her that rivaled Leia's. Uchani was amazing at calming Anakin down when he was angry, the gentle waves of her Force presence dousing out the embers in his. She had become his little sister as well.

Then there was Myn. A young Tholothian, Myn was brave and outspoken, and him and Anakin fit well together. He was the sixth student Anakin had taken, and though he loved all his students, Anakin remembered Myn vividly.

In all his eternal years, Anakin had not been prepared for seeing his Padawan die young. In battle, no less.

Myn was slain by a Darksider in the catacombs of Akiva. Anakin had been too late, moments too late; after cutting down the enemy, he watched as Myn's life dwindled.

Knowing Anakin well after ten years of training, Myn had wheezed, "Don't- Don't do anything- anything reckless, Master." 

Anakin refused to look at the wound on his apprentice's stomach. "Myn, we need to get you to a healer-" 

"Master- Anakin-" Myn coughed, and Anakin felt the tears in his eyes overflow and run down his face.

"No, please, not you too," Anakin said, but he already knew what the outcome would be.

"It'll be okay, Anakin," Myn murmered, and then he was gone, just like all the others.  

Anakin shook off the memory of his last Padawan, and he sat down in the middle of the room. Rex's helmet (Rex, who had lived to be 105 once the accelerated aging was healed, had never stopped standing up for what was right. When his body failed him, he switched to words, fighting until the end. Anakin missed his twin so much), which Anakin had kept in as good condition as possible, stared back at him as he told his family of his day.

When he finished, he felt a presence behind him, and wasn't surprised to see the faint blue glow of Obi-Wan's ghost.

"It sounds like you had a good day, Anakin."

"I did," He said back happily. "But it's not over yet. I'm about to go see the younglings- care to join me, Master?"

Obi-Wan smiled softly. "I'd be delighted, Padawan mine."

[side-shawty]

Ivy’s Daughter • Two

Title: Ivy’s Daughter • Two

Fandom: DC

Type: series

Prompt/Summary: Poison Ivy asks Batman to care for her daughter.

Pairing(s): (eventual) Damian Wayne x Reader (aged up), Batfamily x Reader

Requested? Yes

It took two weeks for J’onn to permanently stabilize Y/N’s mind and for Bruce to utilize everything Ivy gave him to create a compound that stabilized her growth. She would age slower than the average person but it was better than the accelerated growth rate she had to begin with.

He also tried to acquaint her as much as he could with society and its norms. His kids would take care of whatever he missed. Or at least he hoped so.

In this time you were staying in a room at the League HQ. The very first time you opened your eyes the first thing you were met with was a ceiling full of stars against the darkness of space.

Every inch of you was filled with shock and surprise but you stood quickly and almost knocked over the IV as it was ripped from your arm with the movement.

You called for your mother, and when no answer found your ears you began to panic. You attempted to open the doors, the first was a bathroom and the second one was certainly the exit because it had been sealed shut.

“Let me out!” You screamed and waited. No answer again.

You looked around the room for something that could help you get the door open but the room was bare save for your bed, a nightstand with a bamboo plant, and two plastic chairs against the wall under a window.

Your breathing was heavy and ragged as you dragged yourself to the said window and looked out of it. You were slowly floating through space and the Earth was shining back at you with it’s beautiful blue and green.

You were terrified but for some reason, the view made your breathing slow and you took deep breaths.

Panicking now would do nothing, you had to think of a plan. As you were racking your brain for ideas there was a soft hiss as the door slid open.

Your head quickly whipped around to eye the figures standing in the doorway. An uncowled Batman and Superman were both looking to you with sympathy clouding their eyes.

“Hello, Y/N,” Batman said, “My name is —“

“Bruce Wayne,” you cut him off, “My mother told me about you. She said I could trust you. Where is she?” You asked.

“In hiding,” Bruce said stepping closer with his hands raised in front of him. You didn’t of him as a threat but appreciated the gesture.

“Why?” You asked.

“In order to keep you safe, she had to do some things she’s not proud of. There are some bad people after her now, so she left you in my care,” Bruce told you, now only a few steps away. He put his hands at his side.

“No,” you said, “bring me back. I want to be with my mother.”

“I don’t know where she is,” He said.

The anger that flared in your eyes made Superman shift on his feet at his place in front of the closed door.

Before you got the chance to speak again Bruce continued, “I spoke to her before she left. She wanted me to tell you that she loves you very much but this is the only way to keep you safe.”

“Throwing me into outer space? I would have been better off at home, I can take care of myself,” you said, crossing your arms.

As if the universe had been personally involved in this conversation the station rocked and you lost your footing, Bruce caught you before you could hit the ground.

After releasing you, he looked to Superman and sighed, “Jason is here with Bizzaro. Make sure they don’t break anything else, please.”

Superman looked wary before nodding his head and exiting the room.

“Jason? As in your son—Red Hood?” You asked. Batman’s eyes went wide for a millisecond before he recovered.

“Yes. You’ll be meeting him when we go home.”

“And when will that be?”

“Tonight.”

———

You were given a pair of black jeans, boots, and a long-sleeved t-shirt to change into when Bruce told you it was time to go. It was the last thing you wanted, so you devised a plan, you would stay for a few days, maybe a week and then you’d slip away and find your mother. It wasn’t at all fool-proof but it was a start.

On the walk to the zeta tube, Bruce had told you that this was your home and you wouldn’t feel like a prisoner, but there were still rules.

When the flash of teleportation faded from your vision you were faced with the intricate, oddly welcoming Bat Cave. In your opinion it was stunning, but you didn’t get much time to fully explore it or take it in as Bruce led you towards computers and the people standing amongst them.

Three boys were standing with an older man and a young woman, once you and Bruce reached them you decided to let someone else speak first.

“Y/N these are my children,” Bruce began, “well some of them. Dick, Tim, Cassandra, and Damian. And this,” he gestured to the older man, “is Alfred. He’s one of the reasons things continue to run around here. You’ll meet the other later.” He told you smiling to himself at an inside joke.

“This is Y/N Isley. She’ll be staying with us.” Bruce said and you waited for more but it never came.

Dick was the first to move forward, “Nice to meet you Y/N,” he stared, holding out his hand. You shook it. “What Bruce failed to mention was that I am also the oldest and his favorite,” He said with a smile before his phone chimed. He removed it from his pocket to check.

“I am also late for a date, but welcome and I’ll see you around,” Dick told you with a wink before heading towards a staircase and disappearing.

“While he might be the oldest, I’m the brains of this operation,” Tim said before also shaking your hand.

“You’re still as delusional as ever Drake,” Damian said, and once you looked to him he was the only thing that holds your attention as the two of them began to bicker.

He looked like Bruce, but not really. His eyes were a different shade of blue, almost green…almost. As you continued to stare, Cassandra walked up to you.

“I’m Cass,” she said, her voice was soft and sweet as she bowed her head ever so slightly instead of shaking your hand.

“Hi,” you replied, realizing it was the first thing you had said since coming into the cave.

“Let’s get cookies,” she said to you and linked her arm with your own before bringing you up the same stairs Dick went up. Alfred followed closely behind and Bruce sought to stop his sons from arguing.

———

You liked Cass. She was a woman of few words but they got her point across every time. Afterward, she had given you a quick tour of the main living areas before she had to leave for patrol.

When she left you decided to wander a bit more on your own. The manor was even more extraordinary than you could have imagined. You found yourself gravitating towards the library.

While you were in your cryo-chamber your mother had taken to reading to you. She was never sure if you could hear or not but you remember. It was always peaceful when she read to you.

You felt a pang in your heart as you stepped inside and began running your hands along the spines of the books. You stopped on one with a green cover when the door to the library opened and closed.

Your eyes met Damian’s when you turned to him. His face was tight and uninviting as he watched you continue to read the spines.

After a few more moments he finally spoke.

“You don’t belong here,” he said, his voice was emotionless and uninviting. You sighed and finally turned to him, crossing your arms.

Damian was only a few feet from the door but was slowly inching closer to you.

“I don’t belong anywhere,” You said to him, and his features flickered briefly, he clearly wasn’t expecting that answer.

“So why not try to leave?” Damian asked, he finally stopped an arm's length away.

“I haven’t got anywhere to go. Not yet anyway,” You told him, tugging at a red curl and wrapping it around your finger.

“Well, your mother was a criminal with connections. So the faster you find one, the faster you leave.” He said, crossing his arms.

It was hard not to look at Damian’s arms in the fitted black t-shirt. He saw your gaze shift for a second and gave the faintest of smirks.

“This house is a fortress. I step a toe off the property and your father would drag me back,” You released your curl and turned back to the books on the shelf.

“Tt, if you were half the mastermind your mother was you could, and will, be out by morning,” He said before turning on his heel and leaving.

[simsroyallegacy]

Lunaria’s Royal Family: Four Years Later

It’s been four long years since the tragic passing of Crown Princess Calliana and there has been many changes in Lunaria’s Royal Family since then; let’s take a look at the family she left behind.

(Above: The last photo taken of King Vincent two months ago, leaving the residence of the head of the House of Lords.) 

His Majesty King Vincent has spent these past years attending to Royal business as usual with the exception of the last year and a half, where his health has been in the decline. The King is getting on in his years and he has been battling heart complications recently. His youngest son, the Duke of Andale, has been taking on several of his engagements in order to help him rest. 

Many are speculating on whether or not the King is going to be abdicating in favor of HRH Crown Prince Arden this year; if he does, the monarchy will be met with serious opposition from the people. Since the death of his wife Arden has taken a step back from his public life, attending only State events and leaving his philanthropic work on the back burner. Many Lunarians question his ability to rule, feeling as if he has little to no care for his country and its people anymore. HM has yet to make any statements regarding an abdication, but it’s safe to say that if the King goes, Lunaria will be left in a state of unrest.

(Above: Prince Nicky spotted heading to class with his roommate and best friend, Prince Gabriel.)

On a happier note, the children of the Crown Prince are more popular than ever!  The media has tried its best to keep up with the three children of Crown Prince Arden and they’ve all become Lunaria’s sweethearts! 

HRH Prince Nicholas, the oldest of the three, is currently attending the University of Britechester like his parents before him. He lives in a townhome on campus with his best friend HRH Prince Gabriel of Castille. He has decided to study law and is well on his way to graduating with honors.

In the meantime, the future King of Lunaria is working hard during his breaks from uni, taking over many of his father’s engagements for him. His most popular project to date is a scholarship program called Infinite Horizons. The program, which offers high achieving students from low-income families a tuition-free education at their university of choice, launched just over a year ago and has gained popularity with many students across the country.  It currently accepts only five students a year, but the Prince has recently been quoted to be determined to triple that number in the next year.

Aside from making high schooler’s dreams come true, Prince Nicky has also been making his girlfriend, Lady Anissa Crawford’s, dreams a reality as well. The two have been spotted on luxurious trips and dinners, and articles have photographed Anissa showing off expensive gifts from HRH (Jewelry, clothes, even a CAR!). Easy-A’s reputation hasn’t gotten any better since we had first seen the couple; several scandals have popped up in the past four years depicting Anissa with other, extremely wealthy, men. Much to our horror, Nicky’s  forgiven her and taken her back each time. Here’s hoping to HRH pulling his head out of the sand!

(Above: Prince Charles with Alivia Acharya, last week’s girlfriend-of-the-week and the daughter of the Ambassador to the country of Dhuri.)

Unlike his older brother, HRH Prince Charles just can’t seem to be tied down. Taking up the mantle of Lunaria’s Wildest Prince from his Uncle Rhys, Charles seems to be dating his way through all the girls in his social circle. Never spotted with the same heiress twice, it looks like we’ll have to watch out for the next Royal romance scandal with this teen!

Charles’ womanizing ways aside, the young Prince is set to finish his final year at Hartfordshire Academy with excellent grades. HRH has expressed an interest in studying physics at the Foxbury Institute, where his cousin Prince Matthew is currently attending. 

(Above: A photo taken of Princess Annaliese and the personal bodyguard that had been injured on the job with her just before they entered the car doomed to crash.)

Citizens have been excited to watch HRH Princess Annaliese wherever she goes since the camera-shy princess aged up! Annaliese, nicknamed Ana after her grandmother, is constantly surrounded by bodyguards when she is spotted in Windenburg. She attends St. Ives Prep, an all-girls high school near Whiteglenn Manor where the Crown Prince family stays.

Princess Ana is the spitting image of her mother, and is constantly approached by the press, despite her and her family asking for her privacy throughout her life. She has had several run ins with the media where things have ended badly, the most recent being six months ago where a paparazzo from a popular tabloid chased HRH’s car down and caused an accident. A member of her security team was severely injured in the crash, and the young princess has refused to be seen in public since.

Reports from insiders claim that Ana feels incredibly guilty about the injury of one of her protectors and is terrified of something like that happening again. We’re happy to report that the injured party is recovered and spending time with their family (they even plan on returning to their position as the princess’ personal security guard!). The paparazzo has also been imprisoned after causing a major traffic accident and endangering a member of the Lunarian Royal Family.

(Above: Crown Prince Arden, still wearing his wedding ring, spotted on his way to Windenburg Palace for his weekly meeting with the King.)

Lastly we will revisit the Crown Prince Arden and what he’s been up to since the murder of his wife. HRH has taken to attending only large State functions, seen in public only when absolutely necessary. The press have been banned from being anywhere near his official residences and their access to Windenburg Palace has been heavily restricted.

Notably missing whenever we do get to see the Crown Prince is his smile. He maintains a poker face at whatever event he attends and is seen grim faced even in his family portraits and photos (as seen in the most recent family photo released above). Our inside sources also claim that he has drifted from his children, spending less and less time with them over the years.

“The saddest thing is his relationship with little Ana,” an anonymous source quotes. “He can’t even look at her because of her resemblance to Calliana.”

It can also be noted that HRH was absent from Prince Nicky’s high school graduation three years ago and was out of the country during Prince Charles’ most recent birthday; only sending a monetary gift in the mail. Those poor kids! 

Thankfully Arden’s siblings, the Duke of Andale and the Queen of Windsor, have been taking time out of their very busy schedules to support their niece and nephews. Both were photographed giving congratulations to Nicky on his graduation and the Duke threw a spectacular party for Charles on his birthday at his home, Highland House. Arden’s three children have also gone to stay with their aunt’s family in Windsor for the past few summers and even spent Christmas there as well. We’re glad they can at least get some familial support still, though we would like to see the Crown Prince return to the doting father he used to be!

[felipeandletizia]

Felipe & Letizia’s decade: Trips Abroad

F&L Decade 61/?? 

King Felipe and Queen Letizia paid an Official Visit to Washington, DC and Florida, USA, between September 15 and 18, 2015. They were accompanied by the Minister of Foreign Affairs and Cooperation, José Manuel García-Margallo. During the visit, among other activities, they met with President Obama and his wife and They joined the 450th anniversary of Saint Augustine, the oldest American city of European origin.

On the 15th, Their Majesties the Kings began activities in Mount Vernon. Don Felipe and Doña Letizia visited the pantheon and the residence of President George Washington. The Kings made a wreath in the pantheon and had the opportunity to greet the volunteers, dressed in period costume, from the Louisiana Fixed Infantry Regiment.

Next, they headed to the Fred W. Smith National Library for the Study of George Washington. The Kings accessed the rooms that house George Washington's personal library, made up of 900 volumes, and viewed various manuscripts and outstanding books owned by the first American president, such as two old editions of "Don Quixote." Don Felipe and Doña Letizia presented, as a donation to this institution, a reproduction of the Credential Letters of the first Ambassador of the United States of America in Spain, addressed to Carlos IV and signed by George Washington.

Later, Don Felipe and Doña Letizia visited the White House, where they were received by the President of the United States of America, Barack Obama, and his wife, the First Lady, Michelle Obama.

His Majesty the King and President Obama held a meeting in the Oval Office of the White House. At their conclusion, they offered the media a few brief statements.

Meanwhile, Doña Letizia and Mrs. Obama met in the private residence and visited the garden-orchard of the White House, within the initiative of the First Lady "Let's move", which aims to promote good eating habits.

In the afternoon, the Kings attended the Congress of the United States of America to hold a meeting with the Senate Foreign Affairs Committee, in which they discussed various international policy issues. The day ended with a reception for a representation of the Spanish community in Washington, which was attended by nearly two hundred attendees.

On September 16, His Majesty the King held a working breakfast with American businessmen at the Residence of the Spanish Ambassador, organized by the ICEX-Invest in Spain and the Economic and Commercial Office of the Spanish Embassy in the United States, in collaboration with the US Chamber of Comerce, in which representatives of companies such as DuPont, Dow Chemicals, Costco, Lilly, Microsoft, HP, 3M, Honeywell, Marriott, UPS, IP were present Containers or General Motors.

Don Felipe pointed out that there is still a lot of potential to be discovered in the economic relations between both countries and that now is a good time to consider investing in Spain.

In parallel, Her Majesty the Queen visited the National Cancer Institute at the Clinical Hospital of the National Institutes of Health (NIH). After learning about the research laboratories of the pediatric cancer-fighting unit, Doña Letizia held a working meeting.

Later, at the Ronald Reagan Building and International Trade Center, the King attended the seminar "A transatlantic conversation", organized by the Wilson Center and the Royal Elcano Institute. In his speech, the King referred to the need to address global challenges, such as climate change, nuclear proliferation and global terrorism, through global solutions.

At noon, Don Felipe held a working lunch with scientists and experts participating in the seminar, and then met with a group of young Hispanic leaders in the United States.

In the evening, Their Majesties the Kings attended the presentation ceremony of the First Meeting of Spanish Scientists in the United States at Georgetown University. This initiative, promoted by the Prince of Asturias Chair of this academic institution, aims to forge and strengthen links between scientists, explore new opportunities for interdisciplinary collaboration, create a forum for discussion and reflection on the current state of scientific disciplines and their advances and build bridges that facilitate communication between the Spanish scientific community in the USA. and public and private organizations in both countries.

"The professionals of the Spanish Science are essential actors in this scientific and social gear, and protagonists of innovation and technical knowledge. You are social references for the vocation of our young people and true architects to build solid bridges between generations of scientists. You are example of talent and perseverance, shows the strengths of our educational system, ambassadors of our culture, as well as a very valuable connector between our internal scientific and technological capacities and the networks of knowledge and innovation on a global scale," Don Felipe told the scientists .

The day ended with a dinner offered in honor of Their Majesties the Kings by Georgetown University. In his toast, Don Felipe took stock of the enrichment that the relations between Spain and the United States have experienced in the twenty years that have passed since his graduation: "I am proud to see that Spanish companies invest more in the United States than American companies in Spain and they employ more than 80,000 Americans. It is also great to see Spain as the second preferred destination outside the continent for American students. We receive almost 25,000 each year. Let me also tell you that Spanish is the second most spoken language in the The United States, as well as the second language for international communication throughout the world. Finally, I must emphasize that our friendship as nations and peoples has grown strongly. Today, Spain and the United States are more united than ever, not only in the NATO, and facing new challenges together."

On the 17th, Their Majesties the Kings traveled to Florida. In the afternoon, in the Freedom Tower-headquarters of the main auditorium of Miami Dade College-, the president of Miami Dade College imposed the Presidential Medal of the academic center on Don Felipe.

Subsequently, His Majesty the King gave the inaugural conference for the 2015-2016 academic year, entitled "The Spanish of the United States", where in Spanish and English, Don Felipe valued the importance of this language as a "substantial part" of the present of the United States and "cardinal component" of its future, reason why it defended the existence of "a Spanish of the United States", with its own social and linguistic profile, in front of "the Hispanic you speak of other latitudes". He also stressed that "the Spanish of the USA cannot be understood as an autonomous variety, at the exclusive service of an interior community and isolated from other peoples with a common history, but as a manifestation of an international language enriched by endless modalities and accents from North and South America, the Caribbean and Africa, Europe and the Pacific. Homogeneity and, at the same time, the multiplicity of voices are the basis of the wealth of Spanish and its international projection " .

At the end of the conference, Their Majesties the Kings went to the Miami Dade College exhibition area. Don Felipe and Doña Letizia delivered a series of engravings on the life and work of Pedro Menéndez de Avilés - Asturian admiral who landed in 1565 on these coasts and named the place with the name of the patron saint of his native town (San Agustín) - , belonging to the Tegesta collection and made by the painter Amado González Hevia "Favila", and various books on the common history and relations between Spain and the United States.

A reception given by the president of Miami Dade College in honor of Their Majesties the Kings, ended the act.

The day concluded with the attendance at the presentation of the Spanish Film Festival "Recent Cinema from Spain", at the Olimpia Theater in Miami, where the film "Cándida" was shown. This festival, created in 2011 and promoted by the Audiovisual Producers Rights Management Entity (EGEDA), opens a new space for the promotion of Spanish cinema in the US, both among the general public and before the international audiovisual industry , with a genre-rich cinematography that easily connects with the American audience, especially the Latin one.

On the 18th, Don Felipe and Doña Letizia visited the city of San Agustín on the occasion of the 450th anniversary of its foundation. They began their tour of the Castillo de San Marcos, which continued through the Lightner Museum. The Kings signed there in the book of honor of San Agustín and delivered to the city a painting by Pedro Menéndez de Avilés made by the painter Amado González Hevia "Favila".

Then they went to the Government House. From the balcony, Don Felipe addressed a few words to the citizens gathered in the square, in which he referred to the deed of Pedro Menéndez de Avilés and joined the celebration of the 450th anniversary of the city. He also recalled the brotherhood of San Agustín with Avilés and the island of Menorca. "It is something that we can be proud of, both Spanish and American, united as we are by an inspiring past and a promising future as friends and allies," said the King.

Later, the Kings went to the Cathedral Basilica of San Agustín, where a short prayer of blessing and dedication of the bells of the Basilica to the Spanish Crown was held. After this visit, the mayor of San Agustín offered a lunch in honor of Their Majesties the Kings at Flagler College. In his speech, Don Felipe asked to take advantage of the 450th anniversary commemorations of the city of San Agustín "to shed light, more than on the characters and on the facts, on what they mean: the transmission of a culture that today permeates the entire American reality and that grows green day by day thanks to the more than fifty million Hispanics who today reside, work, integrate and commit to the future of the United States. "

In the afternoon, the King presented the Bernardo de Gálvez Prize to Ford's President and CEO, Mark Fields, at the Casa Mónica hotel. With this annual award, the Spain-United States Council Foundation intends to honor and publicize the work of those persons or institutions, of American nationality who, with their work, example or dedication, have promoted cooperation between Spain and the United States. Together, they have improved reciprocal knowledge and the respective images or have developed any initiative that has resulted in progress and increased relations between the two societies.

Don Felipe then met with the Governor of Florida, Rick Scott, to whom he presented, as a donation, the sculpture "The passage to a new world: the foundation of Saint Augustine by Pedro Menéndez de Avilés".

Subsequently, Their Majesties the Kings returned to Flagler College to attend the opening dinner of the XX Spain-United States Forum, organized by the Spain-United States Council Foundation and its United States counterpart, the United States – Spain Council. These meetings bring together their respective members each year and have the participation of leaders from the public and private sectors of both countries to address different issues of common interest. Among the topics addressed in its sessions, those related to business and financial promotion stand out, as well as analyzes of certain economic sectors (infrastructure, transport, technology, finance or energy, among others). Other issues are also debated such as the situation of triangulation relations between Spain, the United States and Latin America, the economic and cultural dimension of the Spanish language or the situation of the thriving Hispanic communities.

After this act, Their Majesties the Kings undertook their return to Spain.

[visionsofelizabeth]

✖ ▒ OH, WHAT A COINCIDENCE! i was just thinking of [ ELIZABETH OF YORK ]. most swear their resemblance to [ KEIRA KNIGHTLEY ] is unmistakable, but she has been around since the [ LATE MIDDLE AGES ]. it is rumoured that the [ CIS FEMALE ] was born in [ LONDON, UNITED KINGDOM ] in the year [ 1466 ], even though they don’t look a day over [ THIRTY ]. what a shame, though: they were once famed for being [ AMBITIOUS ] and [ STEADFAST ] ; yet now, they seem more and more [ STUBBORN ] and [ INTERFERING ]. but while [ ELIZABETH ] spends their days working as [ A POLITICAL AIDE ], they are already notorious around town for [ CRAFTING PRECISELY THE RIGHT WORDS AND FITTING THEM INTO SOMEONE ELSE’S MOUTH; METICULOUS & BEAUTIFUL PENMANSHIP; “ANCESTRAL” HALLS SHORTER-LIVED THAN YOU; THE CENTURIES’ OLD GLEAM OF A CROWN; A WAY TO WIN ON EITHER SIDE OF THE BATTLE ]. when you live forever, you might as well make the most of it. ( shannon. 20. bst/gmt+1. she/her. )

MUN STUFF:

hello hi there, friends! i’m shannon, i really hate ( most of ) philippa gregory, and this is the historical love of my life, elizabeth of york. i hope i make you all love her as much as i absolutely adore her. if you’re invested in the experience, i recommend listening to ‘the tower’ by ludovico einaudi while reading about her because it really helped me get my feelings about her down onto paper.

BASICS:

FULL NAME: her majesty queen elizabeth of england.

MONIKER / NICKNAME: lizzie; the white rose of york ( nicknames. )

TITLES: queen consort of england ( 1486-1503 ), princess ( 1466-1483 officially; regarded a princess by some after this date until her coronation as queen consort in 1486. )

GENDER && PRONOUNS: cis female && she/her.

DOB && AGE: eleventh of february, fourteen sixty-six ( age five hundred and fifty-four; immortally thirty. )

PLACE OF BIRTH: westminster palace, london, england.

ZODIAC SIGN: aquarius.

ETHNICITY: white.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: biromantic

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE:

FACE CLAIM: keira knightley.

HEIGHT: 5 ft 7 in (170cm)

PHYSICAL BUILD: slim, rectangular.

EYE COLOUR AND SHAPE: brown; deep-set.

HAIR COLOUR AND STYLE: brown; varies.

USUAL EXPRESSION: neutral.

ACCENT AND SPEECH STYLE: received pronunciation; measured speed.

DISTINGUISHING MARKS / CHARACTERISTICS: pierced ears & an outline of the rennes cathedral tattooed on her wrist that she got done ten years ago.

CLOTHING STYLE: varies heavily; in her job, she likes suits now.

JEWELLERY AND ACCESSORIES: she still wears her wedding ring from the 1480s, and possesses earrings in the likeness of the tudor rose, though she can so rarely wear the latter.

FAMILY:

FATHER: edward iv of england

MOTHER: elizabeth woodville

SIBLINGS, IF ANY: nine full, two half.

EXTENDED RELATIONS: cecily neville (grandmother) && richard iii of england (uncle.)

SIGNIFICANT OTHER(S): henry vii of england (husband, 1486—, legally ended upon her “death” in 1503). there has and will be no one else.

CHILDREN: seven or eight, including henry viii of england.

HOUSEHOLD PET(S): none; they die too soon. she used to keep greyhounds in her heyday.

FAVOURITES:

COLOUR: red && white; the colours of lancaster and york.

WEATHER: when it is overcast but comfortably so, and rain is on the horizon so the air is refreshing when it caresses your face. quintessentially english.

FOOD ITEM: the christmas roast. it reminds her of raucous and happy times with her family.

BEVERAGE: burgundian wine.

TIME OF DAY: just before dawn, when everything is peaceful & the world could just seem... perfectly endless, and yet, so small.

TELEVISION GENRE: drama. political & nordic noir. think borgen & the killing.

FAVOURITE ERA LIVED: 1486-1503; the years of her marriage.

PERSONALITY:

HOBBIES: gambling & music & reading & dancing & writing & watching theatre.

PET PEEVES: people who chew loudly. tardiness.

ALLERGIES: none known.

MBTI TYPE: estj-a.

ENNEAGRAM TYPE: type one, with a two wing: “the advocate.”

SLEEPING HABITS: restless. not as regular as they should be.

OLDEST BELONGING: her wedding ring from the 1480s.

HOME: chester square, belgravia.

DAUGHTER, SISTER, NIECE AND WIFE

No one else will ever be all four to kings ( Edward IV, Edward V, Richard III, Henry VII ) but that distinction — much like your life — is marred by instability, grief and strife. 

Your father became sick: whisperings of poison persist, and you must admit you are not sure of the truth. Your brother disappeared to the Tower: whisperings of murder exist, and you must admit you are not sure of the truth. But you are sure that your uncle met his end upon Bosworth field, and on the matter of your husband you are sure that you love him. 

At first you were not sure, at first it was not easy, but such is love.

Sweet Elizabeth, daughter of scandal: the fairest of her father’s children by his second marriage to Elizabeth Woodville. They call her ‘common,’ though she is beautiful; they are not audacious enough to call you half-common, because it is only descendancy from the God-chosen King that matters to them. 

There would be more daughters before Elizabeth Woodville gave unto her husband sons, and by then they are talking.

THINGS I PROBABLY DON’T NEED TO WRITE CREATIVELY BUT YOU DO NEED TO KNOW, A SAGA:

Elizabeth of York was the first-born daughter of Edward IV and his wife Elizabeth Woodville; she was widely believed to be the fairest of his children. She had two older half-siblings from her mother’s first marriage, and would have nine full-blooded siblings: Mary, Cecily, Edward (V), Margaret, Richard, Anne, George, Catherine, and Bridget. Bold denotes the two ‘Princes in the Tower’ and italics denotes siblings who died in infancy.

In childhood, she was betrothed to the future King Charles VIII of France, but the French failed to keep to their end of the agreement & it was called off. Previously, she had been betrothed to a noble’s son, but this too was repudiated after the father rebelled against Edward.

The former King Henry VI was briefly returned to the throne when Elizabeth was but four years old. Elizabeth, her siblings, and their pregnant mother lived under religious protection until Edward was restored in 1471.

In 1483, Edward IV died, and the unexpected nature of this death & the age of her brother — also named Edward — combined by the ambition for power held by her uncle the Lord Protector ( Richard, Duke of Gloucester ) threw the succession into doubt. Once again, they were forced into sancturary.

Ultimately, both Edward V and the younger Richard disappeared shortly after her uncle took the throne as Richard III, known as the Princes in the Tower, with much credence lent to the theory that they were murdered; the Titulus Regius, in declaring the late King’s controversial — as Elizabeth Woodville was a ‘common’ widower and the marriage secret — marriage invalid, bastardised their children and robbed Elizabeth of York and her siblings of status & rights to succession.

When whispers began of an effort against Richard for the throne, the strongest claim was undoubtedly Elizabeth of York’s own. But there had been no queen that ruled in her own right, and would not for some years, and so Elizabeth Woodville arranged for her to marry the Lancastrian claimant Henry Tudor, who traced his line through a legitimised bastard line. 

It was illegal for a Beaufort to take the throne, but it was agreed that they would support his efforts, perhaps due to Elizabeth’s vitriol toward Richard for the disappearance of her son. Henry vowed to marry Elizabeth in 1483.

Henry Tudor won the battle of Bosworth Field and was crowned Henry VII: he married Elizabeth in January 1486, their first child, Arthur, being born that autumn. 

The marriage initially was politics-born, but they came to love one another deeply, and there is no evidence of the king having kept a mistress. 

FROM DEATH TO “DEATH”

18 March, 1496

The eighteenth of March, fourteen ninety-six, is immortalised in your mind as the day that you died. You were thirty that day — giving birth to your fifth child, Mary — and you are thirty now, utterly untouched by the centuries. 

The death must have lasted mere moments; no one beyond your attentive husband noticed, and it was some time beyond then that the both of you began to believe it. 

It was the tallest of the tales your mother told you in her confinement at Bermondsey before her death four years ago. But when they told you she was dead ( perhaps of plague, demanding a rushed & private ceremony ) it would take a fool not to wonder whether the machinations of Elizabeth Woodville, the queen dowager, would continue from beyond the ‘grave.’

( The Reaper himself surely could not stop so ambitious a woman: and were it not for the king’s mother, perhaps you could have been more like her. You wonder whether you would want to be. )

Time passed, and yet none upon your face. Henry holds you close in anxious murmurings of what they will do to you if you are discovered; whisperings between kisses of witch-burnings. 

You know, though you wish that he was not, that he is right to be afraid.

4 April, 1502

For all the world and time, no worse news could be imagined; the existence of those without faith is one without pity or mercy & you have always tried to keep your love of God intact, but it is oh-so-difficult when the world itself is so malignant as to take your little prince away. 

Why is it, then, that you must live and yet bury your son? Why must his wife live on and yet he must die? You are not a spiteful woman. But even you, in this all-consuming grief, must be allowed your bitterness.

You remind your husband of the grace of God: it does not help you believe it. 

You remind your that you have a son and two daughters, and that Arthur is with God, and it does not help you believe it. 

You remind your husband that you are both young and have time enough yet.

It does not help you believe it.

As soon as you are gone from him, having remained strong for Henry’s sake alone, you buckle, and you wail, and you scream in defiance; it is hopeless, of course, for you to have insisted on sparing him your grief. When you need him, he will always come, until he can no longer.

10th February, 1503

Your newborn daughter Katherine stopped breathing, and something trapped the scream in your throat like a reassurance: some hand over your mouth whispering wait, until the baby girl wailed and began to move again. 

She is too young to have the burden of forever on those tiny shoulders, you think, but did any of you ever get a choice in whether or not you wanted to be Time’s Atlas? You say nothing of the occurrence to anyone bar your dearest beloved, who you trust with an implicitness thought impossible the day you married him. 

How could one of the white rose trust one of the red? 

Your blood still mars the bedsheets, too much of it, dark & damning; they thought the sanguine waterfall would never stem, skin growing paler and paler, until you were a paper ghost. Of course, you knew that you would not die. The doctors didn’t: they call you a miracle. The bells are rung for joy, but when they are gone, there is rue upon your husband’s face. Not long ago, they began to comment upon your unchanging visage, like an ever-fresh flower, and you both knew.

“It won’t be long before—” You press your finger gently to his lips, and he moves it away. “It’s time.”

“I know.”

11th February, 1503

The tower is just barely lit by the sun; you have been here many times before — a highlight of the fact the world still thinks the reality of childbirth, the suffering that comes with a miracle, to be a matter of shame — and he has always hated the separation from you, but this time, in the eyes of the nation ( he will deceive even his mother ) you will not leave it alive. 

Cast your gaze back over your shoulder, and ask the most natural question of the immortal race: how did you get here? 

To this liminal space, this balancing-act, between the past ( for this home of yours will be your past, your life with him will be your past, but your love for him will be your present, your tomorrow, and your always ) and forever? Can you process the endlessness of it — of forever — my love, where so many empires, overestimating their longevity, have failed; can you understand, darling, that you will watch the crumbling demise of so many more without him? 

( When you see his vision misted over with tears, is your husband still the most beautiful, lovable thing you have ever beheld? He is. He is, and no matter how the centuries pass — no matter how many kings, queens and vagabonds you lay eyes upon — he always will be; they will brand him a penny-pincher and a miser as loss haunts him, but you will remember him like this, in the most pain he has and will ever be in, but selfless anyway, because here’s the kicker they all forget: he loves you. )

“My Lizzie,” he murmurs to you, kisses the backs of your fingers, and it is a vow. Even in the depths of his pre-emptive sorrow, he looks up. His mother always says he was God-chosen to be king, but it has always been you who puts him on his knees. “Happy Birthday.”

You promise yourself then — ruminating on the fact you have never had an unhappier birthday than this — that you will never forget it.

LIFE AFTER “DEATH” ( POST-1503 )

As is hinted, Henry knew of Elizabeth’s immortality & assisted her in faking her “death.”

Elizabeth has had a long time to live. 

The sole large expense never recorded in the royal books by Henry was to send her away and give her a life of means: the most painful act her husband ever undertook, but which he did because he loved her so dearly. Henry never remarried: though he spoke of it ( had to, because his wife was ostensibly dead ) he staved it off with the instructions he gave to those searching for a second wife. 

Hint: they perfectly described Elizabeth.

For some time, the parted couple sent letters, before they deemed even that a risk to their wellbeing.

Elizabeth was once a pious woman. She is not, anymore: an eternity of time and of watching all die around her will rob any woman of her faith. She was renowned for gentleness and generosity, and that is not entirely lost upon her, but the same grief that forged the Winter King from Henry has touched her, too. 

She is more cynical, more bitter, but she is still trying. It was necessary for her to change: even at first, knowing she had forever to live, she had to force herself to accept the life Henry gave her & not bequeath her money to others who needed it more, as suddenly she needed it to maintain her own life throughout the centuries.

Throughout her life, though, this attitude has meant she has built up enough money to both give comfortably and be comfortable. For example, now, she is both heavily charitable but lives in Belgravia.

Many lives have passed: in just one, for example, she has been a teacher, just as she was to her son Henry. She has settled in this life on a political aide, so she can more obviously move the world. 

The years have made her more ambitious.

She just hopes she will find hope — and her husband, because she knows that if he were dead he would feel it in her heart — before she indelibly becomes the Winter Queen.

TRIVIA ( some things I love & a note on some I have elected to ignore )

Obligatory note that I would sell my soul for someone to play James McAvoy as Henry VII.

Among other things, the Queen from “Sing A Song Of Sixpence” is reportedly Elizabeth of York, and Henry is the King counting his money. 

However, Henry’s penny-pinching nature only blossomed after Elizabeth’s death ( or in this case ‘death’ ) and prior to that death he was very liberal in spending money upon his wife and family. 

Elizabeth may also have inspired the Queen of Hearts on modern-day playing cards.

She was particularly tall for Tudor women — perhaps inherited from her father — as most were much shorter than five-foot six or seven. 

History believes Elizabeth had little political influence, but that perhaps is not so true as they believe. 

It is true that Margaret Beaufort exercised a grand deal of influence and was loudly opinionated, but Elizabeth was able to influence matters through gentle whispers in her husband’s ear, and through love. She did not live for the applause: never had done. Elizabeth was known to be heavily charitable. So why would she make fanfare of her achievements in her husband’s court?

I know Henry VIII isn’t allowed, but Elizabeth would bitch slap him. She would. It has to be said.

[luvnetwork]

A  BRIEF  INTRODUCTION  INTO  THE  NAM  FAMILY.

father  jihoon  nam  &  mother  miyoung  nam.  fraternal  twins  echo  &  evae  nam  (seo  yeji  &  kim goeun),  identical  twins  miteum  &  mireu  nam  (woo  dohwan),  benjamin  “benji”  reid  (jordan  fisher),  december  “ember”  zhao  (zhu  zhengting),  &  phoenix  “nix”  nam  (choi  soobin)

with  inspiration  taken  from  the  umbrella  academy,  the  raven  cycle,  x-men,  my  hero  academia,  and  agents  of  shield.  

jihoon  nam  was  born  gifted.  he  was  smart,  yes,  but  was  talented  in  separate  means  as  well.  when  people  say  that  something  came  to  them  in  a  dream,  it’s  usually  metaphorical.  jihoon,  however,  could  quite  literally  pull  things  out  of  his  dreams.  if  he  was  lucid  enough,  he  could  form  anything  he  could  ever  imagine  and  wake  up  with  it  in  his  hands.  despite  his  attempts  of  keeping  his  gift  hidden,  his  twin  brother  ostracized  him,  wanting  nothing  to  do  with  him  and  his  ‘demonic’  powers.  as  an  adult,  he  took  over  his  father’s  technology  company,  reputation  increasing  because  of  his  imaginative  mind  and  of  course,  his  power.  

quickly,  he  realized  he  was  lonely.  in  his  dreams  he  had  already  met  a  beautiful  woman  his  age,  miyoung,  and  it  was  just  a  matter  of  grabbing  her  hand  and  pulling  her  into  his  world.  and  so  he  did.  the  two  of  them  were  happy,  king  and  queen  of  a  technological  empire.  

1988  |  their  first  child,  phoenix,  wasn’t  planned,  but  he  was  loved  for.  paranoid,  jihoon  didn’t  let  the  child  be  known  to  the  public,  deciding  instead  to  have  him  homeschooled.  nix  didn’t  take  to  this  well,  and  often  snuck  out  in  the  night  as  he  was  growing  up.  his  own  powers,  matching  jihoon’s,  manifested  when  he  was  six  years  old  and  had  brought  back  a  glow-in-the-dark  butterfly  from  a  particularly  vivid  dream.

1990  |  two  years  later,  miyoung  found  two  baby  girls  abandoned  at  the  front  desk  of  the  nam  industries  building.  she  and  jihoon  adopted  the  two  as  their  own,  naming  them  echo  and  evae.  both  of  them  also  developed  powers  at  a  young  age:  echo,  the  ability  to  see  three  seconds  into  the  future,  and  evae,  the  ability  to  run  at  superspeed  for  three  seconds.  echo  was  always  more  assertive  and  opinionated,  while  evae  was  closer  to  nix  in  personality  and  often  helped  him  sneak  out.

1998  |  jihoon’s  brother  gives  his  six  year  old  sons,  miteum  and  mireu,  up  to  him.  like  jihoon,  they  too  had  abilities  that  terrified  and  disgusted  him,  leading  him  to  want  nothing  to  do  with  his  children.  mireu  can  temporarily  brainwash  someone  when  they  answer  something  he  asks.  his  older  twin,  miteum,  can  copy  others’  abilities  upon  touching  them.  the  older  is  serious,  stoic,  and  introverted,  whereas  mireu  has  more  of  a  joke-y  and  extroverted  personality.

2004  |  eight  year  olds  benji  and  ember  meet  at  a  hospital.  they  are  quick  to  figure  out  that  they  have  been  eachothers  consciences  their  entire  lives.  literally,  they  had  been  communicating  with  eachother  forever,  but  had  no  idea  of  the  fact  until  their  parents  get  into  a  car  accident.  both  sets  of  parents  unfortunately  die,  but  as  if  jihoon  was  expecting  this  to  happen,  he  is  there  to  take  care  of  the  children.

obsessed  with  the  power  jihoon  has  under  him,  he’s  eager  to  train  his  five  children’s  skills,  working  hard  to  make  sure  they  can  take  on  anything  and  anyone  they  encounter.  nam  industries  provides  a  cover  for  the  family  as  they  do  this.  

it  starts  as  small  projects  at  first,  little  movements  to  take  down  corrupt  public  figures  and  whatnot,  but  it  escalates  before  jihoon  can  stop  it  from  doing  so.  miyoung  gets  caught  in  the  crossfires.  she  died  in  2007  in  what  the  public  called  a  freak  accident,  but  jihoon  knew  better.  the  kids  knew  better.  

jihoon  disappeared  off  of  the  face  of  the  earth  in  2008.  a  week  later,  on  phoenix’s  twentieth  birthday,  the  oldest  nam  child  didn't  wake  up.  he’s  alive,  breathing,  heart  pumping,  but  his  eyes  don’t  open.  all  of  jihoon’s  possessions  that  he  dreamed  up  stop  working  as  well.  the  other  children  are  quick  to  figure  out  what  this  means  —  phoenix  was  a  dream  thing  too.

he  stays  in  the  medical  bay  in  a  basement  level  of  the  nam  industries  building,  his  siblings  not  ready  to  accept  the  fact  that  their  family  was  falling  apart  right  in  front  of  their  eyes.  what  they  dubbed  as  their  ‘adventures’  that  they  trained  day  and  night  for  skid  to  a  halt.

they  move  on  with  their  lives,  distancing  themselves  from  eachother.  in  2015,  echo  takes  over  as  the  ceo  of  nam  industries  with  little  fanfare.  it’s  silent  knowledge  that  it  should  have  been  phoenix  in  that  chair  on  the  topmost  floor,  but  he  sleeps  at  the  lowest.  

on  the  twelfth  anniversary  of  jihoon’s  disappearance,  the  six  remaining  of  the  nam  family  pay  their  respects  to  the  three  they’ve  lost.  they  gather  at  midnight  in  echo’s  office,  bottles  of  expensive  wine  and  take  out  containers  passed  around  them.  in  the  past  ten  years,  no  one  dared  visiting  phoenix.  maybe  if  they  did,  they  wouldn’t  have  been  surprised  to  see  him  standing  in  the  doorway  of  the  office,  blood  trickling  down  his  arm  where  his  iv  was  just  minutes  ago.

in  the  silence,  they  take  in  what  this  all  means.  one,  phoenix  hasn’t  aged  a  day.  he  looks  like  the  same  twenty  year  old  he  was  when  he  slipped  in  to  the  coma,  and  by  the  way  eyes  wander  around  the  room  curiously,  his  mind  is  twenty  as  well.  two,  they  are  whole  again.

three,  jihoon  has  to  be  alive.

they  haven’t  gotten  used  to  phoenix’s  sudden  appearance,  and  they  don’t  suppose  they  ever  will.  he’s  the  same  yet  completely  different,  dynamics  completely  turned  on  their  heads.  their  team  is  somewhat  reestablished,  and  behind  the  front  of  nam  industries,  the  seven  of  them  employ  a  covert  operation.  assignments  from  external  forces  are  given  to  them,  and  they  complete  them  silently  without  question.  their  main  focus,  however,  is  trying  to  figure  out  where  the  hell  jihoon  nam  went,  why  he  is  back,  and  if  they  should  try  to  find  him  at  all.

[iamthelostsundrop]

A Thousand Years (Tomura Shigaraki X Reader)

A/N: Hey y’all! Wow, I didn’t expect the first story to do so well! I have another one for you. Grab your tissues because it...its kinda depressing. Hope you Ike it and that these altered song fics become more of a regular thing for me!

Warning: Mentions of attempted suicide. One mention of someone being beaten. Death. Shigaraki is also a little OOC in this but idc

Words: 2145

🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️🧬❤️

Time never really made sense to you. Things always either changed or stayed the same. People grow and people die. But not you. You’d been around for a long time. You learned pretty quickly that you had stopped aging when your body stopped maturing and changing, around the time you were 21. You tried to be normal, act like everyone else. You finished college and got a job like everyone else whose quirks weren’t suited to hero work. You and your high school lover got married. You and him had a few children together. It was a good life. Then when you paused and looked at your husband one day, he was old. He was slowing and you were still as agile and young as you were when you were 21, despite your age being in the 60’s now. You saw the love of your life slipping away. You held his hand when he died. You held your children’s hands as they died if you could.

Time passed and you did your best to stay in the background. Not to make connections. Your grandchildren’s grandchildren were graduating from college and you were the same. You started to notice trends in humanity; their violence, their greed and lust for power. You wanted nothing to do with it. Soon you escalated your avoidance into moving as far away from people as you possibly could. You saw it all over the next few hundred years. Life and death, birth and burial. People stopped visiting you. You witnessed the fall of society. Once great cities crumbled and turned to dust. And yet you could not die. You’d tried. Every conceivable way to end someone’s life, you tried it. You tried to end your isolation and seemingly endless life. But your attempts were in vain. Water in your lungs dried. Wounds that should have been fatal closed up and blood replenish itself. Poison tasted sweet and went down easily but never fulfilled its goal. You refused to eat or drink but your body would never waste away. Soon you gave up all hope of ever finding everlasting peace and seeing the afterlife.

Ten thousand years. You had been alive for ten thousand years. Humanity had moved on, after nearly destroying each other with their technology. It was as if time had rewound to the dark ages, with the relics of the past scattered like ruins all over. Humans returned to living in castles with kings and queens who possessed powerful quirks ruling the others. Animals had evolved back into creatures of prey and predators. Strange creatures only seen at the dawn of time and in children’s storybooks began appearing and populating the places man did not. But they let you be. All had been silent in your forest until one warm evening.

A sudden and unexpected knock shattered your serenity. You looked up from the table, almost not believing it. Then it happened again. Three knocks followed by a quiet voice, almost like a nervous whisper.

“Hello? Is anyone there?”

The legs of your chair scraped across the dirt floor and you walked over to the door, opening it a crack. There stood a tall man with hunched shoulders. His face was hidden by a hood so that all you could see the tangled mess of what appeared to either be white or very light blue hair.

“Is this the home of the witch of the woods?” his question caught you off guard. Witch? What was he talking about? You were no witch.

“I’ll ask you again. Are you the Witch who calls these woods your domain?”

“I am no witch,” You said, almost indignantly. “But yes I call this wood my home. Who are you?” Without warning the young man dropped to his knees. He lowered his hood and he looked up at you with startlingly red eyes.

“My name is Shigaraki. Tomura Shigaraki. I come here to humbly ask for shelter from you.” You let the door open fully to look at the man before you.

“I don’t understand. Why do you seek shelter from me?”

“Other men fear these woods and the wild creatures that are in it. I...” He hesitated before continuing. “I Need a place to keep out of their sight. Please M’lady.”

Time had always passed so slowly for you, but the past three weeks had been very different from what you were used to. Tomura was Quiet but extremely helpful around the house; gathering ingredients for dinner, cleaning and generally just being there. It had been so long since you had had anyone around it was almost comforting to have another person around again. One evening after he had set up a fire, you asked him to sit by you on the couch.

“Tell me the stories about me, Tomura.” you said looking at the young man curiously. It had been about five thousand years since you been around humans and you were curious what they had evolved or devolved into.

“All the stories are different. One tells of an old hag that kidnaps children. Another says you’re a catlike creature as old as the oldest trees in the forest. The most common one is that you are one of the old gods, living among us in secret until you decide to tell the other gods it is time for judgment and end humanity.” You couldn’t help but argh out loud at the last one.

“And what do you think now you have met me?”

He was silent for a few moments.

“I believe you are a very quiet, very sad, and very beautiful woman who has seen too many bad things happen and you simply got tired of seeing it. So, you moved out here to be alone with the hope that you would never have to see anyone you love get hurt again.” You were silent. He was right. Everything he had said was correct. You hadn’t noticed that he had moved closer to you.

 “Do you know what my quirk is?” The air was thick around the pair of you as you looked into his eyes. “Do you know why I isolate myself?” Before you could continue your words were cut off by his lips pressing to yours. You melted into him, eyes closed and your mind lost in the moment. For the first time in your life, time stood still. A gloved hand caressed your cheek, warm and comforting. You had been with another person before but this time was unlike an other before. Your bodies felt like they were made for the other, like two pieces of a puzzle that fit together perfectly. Pure bliss.From that point on, things were better. You hadn’t felt this kind of peace since your first lifetime. You watched him do work in the woods, you watched him hunt and start the fire in the evenings. Seasons passed and it was mid winter before you asked him something that had been on your mind for some time.

“Why do you wear gloves?” He was taken aback by the abruptness of the question and how out of the blue it was.

“My power is very destructive.” Humans hadn’t use the term quirk In thousands of years. “I don’t wish to lose control or absentmindedly hurt anything or anyone.” You furrowed your brows.

“Tomura, my love, you know of my past and of my power. Why do you stay silent about yours?” You could see him tense at the subject.

“I. I don’t want to discuss it.”

“Why not?”

“(Y/N), please. Drop the subject.” He turned and looked to you, eyes pleading. He didn’t want to have you look at him like everyone else did. You nodded, going into the kitchen to finish dinner. Tomura disappeared into the woods that evening and did not return that night.

He did not return for six days. Six days you waited on the porch with bated breath, jumping at every sound and sleeping on the couch by the fire. When he did return, you threw your arms around him in tears.

“I was so worried you’d been killed.” he held you close, letting your fear and worries wash away in his comforting warmth

.“It’s time to tell you everything.” he said with a shaky whisper. He sat you down on the couch before removing one of his gloves. He picked up an apple off the table and held it between his thumb and forefinger. As he spoke, he slowly added another finger holding the apple.

“My power is dangerous. Ive told you this before. I call it the power of decay.” When he said this, his fifth finger touched the apple and it withered into dust that settled on the table in a neat pile. 

“It manifested when I was about four. Other kids had exciting or helpful powers like flight or the ability to weird flames, mine turned things to dust. I was made to feel ashamed. Told that I would never do anything good in my life with a power like this. I tried to fit in, I wore the gloves because they were specially made to keep my power hidden and handled. Things were fine until I...” he hesitated and looked into your eyes. They gave him the courage to continue.

“The three days before I found your home in these woods, I lost control. A man accused me of touching his daughter and began to beat me in the square. No one would help despite my pleads of innocence and shouts for help. They watched this man beat me within an inch of my life before I grabbed his arm, without my glove. I didn’t mean to kill him I just wanted him to stop. I ran home, took a bag of provisions and went into the woods where I knew they wouldn’t follow me. I had heard the tales of you hiding in the woods and I knew one way or another you would help me.”

The silence that followed was heavy. The man you’d grown to love wouldn’t me your eyes. You took him by the hand that was gloved and gave it a squeeze.

“You have a brave soul and a heart like a lion, Tomura Shigaraki. And I love you. Nothing you can say or do will ever change that.”

And that was it. You had a love again. Someone to spend their life with. You were happy for many years. You were careful to not have children but that didn’t mean you weren’t intimate. Your favorite part of your evenings was when you were chest to chest with him, so close you couldn’t tell where one person ended and the other began. Years passed and then, like it always did, time began to show on your lover but not on you. Soon his handsome face became aged and withered, while yours stayed fresh and young. He became sick one winter and you knew your time was short. You kneeled beside him and smiled with tears in your eyes.

“Don’t be sad, my love.” he said, voice creaking like a tree about to fall. “You’ll fall in love again.” You shake your head, letting the tears spill finally.

“No, I don’t want you to leave me, Tomura.” Your hand gripped his tightly, afraid to let go. Your eyes met his and in an instant, you knew what you wanted. You knew what you needed to do. You slowly held both of his hands in front of you. Slowly but deliberately you slipped off his gloves. Seeing and understanding what you meant to do, Shigaraki tried to pull away.

“(Y/N). Love please don’t. You’ll die.” That’s when you smile.

“Then I'll be with you.” You both knew he was dying. You had lived for hundreds of thousands of years, and you couldn’t imagine a day where you didn’t have him. He stopped fighting and looked you in your (Y/E/C) eyes. As he took one of his last breaths. He held up his hand to you. 

“Daring, don’t be afraid.” You whispered, “I’ll see you soon my love.” And with those last words, you laced your fingers with his and closed your eyes.

Dying didn’t hurt like you thought it would. It was peaceful. Like falling asleep. A warmth enveloped your body as you turned to dust in his hands. A bright loving light overcame your senses and blinded you, but only for a second. When you opened your eyes again, you were in a warm field of wildflowers. The sun shone above you without a cloud in the sky. A hundred yards away was a large oak territory with a swing swaying in the spring breeze. A young man with white, or was it light blue hair stood waiting. Waiting for you with a smile on his face. You were finally home.

[ironcrwned-archive]

hi friends ! it’s me ur resident clown, bonnie, & i’m stoked to be in this rp with all of you ! i’m 20, located in the est, and i use she/her pronouns ! i’m currently procrastinating all my school work so ! there’s that. below the cut are my babies’ intros, so like this and i’ll hit u up for plotting ! i got out of hand and this is super long so if this is overwhelming, there’s a tl;dr at the bottom !

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 : 𝒙𝒂𝒗𝒊𝒆𝒓 𝒆𝒖𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒆 𝒇𝒊𝒕𝒛𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒃𝒆𝒓𝒕 –– THE ARTIST

alex fitzalan. twenty-three. cismale. he/him. one sib. ––– hey , there’s XAVIER FITZHERBERT from AURADON walking past the castle. they’re the OLDEST child of RAPUNZEL AND EUGENE ‘FLYNN’ FITZHERBERT , isn’t that cool ? talk says they can be pretty - NAIVE , but don’t let that worry you – they can be + BENEVOLENT too. say , don’t you think they remind you of DANCING WITH YOUR FRIENDS UNTIL YOU CAN’T BREATHE, WARM HUGS FROM THE PEOPLE THAT LOVE YOU, NOT WANTING TO GROW UP JUST YET & BOYISH SMILES, or is that just me ? 

𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒔 

the oldest child born to rapunzel & flynn, and it is obvious that he took after rapunzel with his temperament

a soft soul, his smiles always reach his eyes, dimples and cheekbones are his trademarks honestly

growing up, he was always outside, playing with his mother & father & sister ( though he is more of a momma’s boy tbh )

probably made ( and currently makes ) flower crowns for himself and friends

and his strong connection to rapunzel , it’s obvious young xavier got his artistic talent from her

he constantly has paint on his fingers and hands, a sketchbook in his bag with pastels and paints and oils from all over the place

most likely has drawn everyone he’s ever met in his sketchbook and then given it to them for their birthday and/or a holiday

his parents both loved him very very much growing up, and it’s obvious in how he acts. he never hesitated to come to them if there were problems or issues with anything in his life ( friends, relationships, schooling )

xavier is ~kind of~ a partier in the sense he is ALWAYS down to go out and have fun and dance with his friends , but he rarely ever gets out of control due to substances or anything

is currently having a Crisis about his sexuality because he’s really only ever been with females but now he’s just like ... seeing a cute guy and is like wait a min.. 

he hopes to become some type of royal painter or something one day because art is truly his passion 

𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 

okay so obviously, this boy is a big old softie 

he will ALWAYS drop everything he is doing to help someone out, it never matters with him

can be a little ( a lot ) on the awkward side & tries really really hard to not be but it really is just how he is and sometimes it’s endearing and sometimes it’s...like watching aladdin ( 2019 ) scene where aladdin meets jasmine the first time as prince ali .. it’s pretty bad

he is ESPECIALLY cringey when he is talking to someone attractive ( and they’re male/nb and he’s having a Crisis ) and they’re flirting with him...phew just kno that his ears ? are as red as merida’s hair

most likely will never know if someone’s taking advantage of him/using him

𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 

hi i just like making playlists for my characters so ppl know the Vibe™️

i. talk too much // coin – ii. supercut // lorde. – iii. boy’s dont cry // the cure. – iv. made of light // mikky ekko – v. chicago // sufjan stevens – vi. eyes shut // years & years

𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒑𝒍𝒐𝒕𝒔

u can check out his tag right here ! so if u see anything u fancy, just lmk !!

but also!! friends!! probably people that he grew up around a lot bc of who his parents were

mayb someone who is the opposite of him ( maybe a villain kid ) who he tries to like ... encourage idk , i just rly like unlikely friendships !

someone who watches out for him , esp because he’s always taking care of others and most likely forgets to take care of himself ( taken by: giselle desroches )

maybe some exes?? most likely females for rn bc he’s discovering his sexuality but these were probably like ... friendly break ups

literally anything i’m pretty easy going !

okay now onto my trash child

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 : 𝒄𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒓𝒂 𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆 𝒆𝒗𝒂𝒏𝒔 –– THE SPITFIRE

olivia holt. twenty-two. cisfemale. she/her. two sibs. ––– hey , there’s CASSANDRA ‘CASSIE’ EVANS from THE ISLE walking past the castle. they’re the YOUNGEST child of CLAYTON , isn’t that cool ? talk says they can be pretty - MANIPULATIVE , but don’t let that worry you – they can be + RESOURCEFUL too. say , don’t you think they remind you of HAIR TIED INTO PONYTAILS WITH RIBBONS, KNOWING YOU CAN DO NO WRONG IN YOUR FATHER’S EYES, AN ARROGANT SMILE AFTER YOU GOT YOUR WAY, & THE FEELING OF BARE FEET IN THE SAND , or is that just me ?  

𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒄𝒌 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒔 

the youngest child of clayton ( the bad guy from tarzan )

and when i tell you she is SPOILED omg

growing up she knew she was cute , mostly because clayton was SURE to tell her that and spoil his little girl ( xavier is a momma’s boy & cassie is for sure daddy’s little girl yikes )

so from a young age, she had a little mischievous side to her. 

it started with lil pranks on her siblings and then her dad and most of them weren’t harmful , just annoying but eventually as she went to school at the isle...she became a monster

she knew she had the innocent face so her friends ( !! wanted plot btw ) would pull pranks on other students and even some teachers

and whenever the other students would try to tell the teachers, cassie would put on a little smile and flip the narrative so she looked good and the other person didn’t. i literally can’t stand her

now in auradon, u know she’s gonna be making sh*t hit the fan whenever she gets the chance

big big disaster Bi that flirts with everyone with NO shame

𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 

so obviously cassie is somewhat of a lil monster ( not somewhat, she is a big one )

can be pretty darn manipulative depending on the situation and whether or not she will benefit from it or not

but ! she does have some redeeming qualities ! 

she is super resourceful meaning that her mind is super quick to find the easiest and most time efficient solution to a problem 

and she’s a pretty good smooth talker in bad situations, she’s known to get her friends out of a lot of sticky situations before

very very flirty okay but hates commitment lol

is pretty adventurous as well, loves the outdoors and hiking and swimming especially

 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 

i. dead weight // pvris. – ii. bad memory // k. flay. – iii. simmer // hayley williams – iv. west coast // lana del rey – v. teach me how to pray // spelles. – vi. don’t hurt yourself // beyonce. 

𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒑𝒍𝒐𝒕𝒔

u can look in her tag right here ! same thing with xavier , if u see something u wanna do just let me know !!

girl squad !!! probably from the isle too and probably f*cked sh*t up over there and now? they’ll most likely do the same thing over in auradon 

probably has lotsssss of exes because she tends to self-sabotage and leave before things get serious. we love some angst in this household 

people that genuinely dislike her lmao 

people she probably flirts with on the daily basis lol 

𝚝𝚕 ; 𝚍𝚛 ( seriously i need to chill )

ik this was A LOT so i’m just gonna summarize them below lol

xavier fitzherbert : son of rapunzel & flynn, art heaux, discovering his sexuality, a whole awkward mess but just wants to help people!

cassandra ‘cassie’ evans : youngest daughter of clayton from tarzan, a little spitfire that manipulates mostly everyone, disaster bi afraid of commitment, and causes too much trouble all the time 

[tvehyungs-gf]

BTS Reaction to their child telling them that they love them for the first time | HYUNGLINE

i think someone requested this a while ago but i just cant seem to find the asks nvm it was in my inbox im going to kms. link to request: here sjdhsdjssdasw im so soft for bts with a wife/husband and kids,,, also i know that ive been inactive for like weeks agAIN ;-;, i’m super sorry about that! | bts masterlist 

JIN:

The first time Jin heard his baby girl tell him that she loves him was when she 6 years old. Your poor baby had gotten a fever and had felt like she was on literally on fire. Her skin was hot and her cheeks were stained a cherry red color.

With a sigh, you sat down next to your worried husband. “I finally got her to fall asleep.” You told him as you leaned into his open arms. Jin smiled slightly. He felt grateful that you took over to put her to sleep tonight since Jin felt exhausted from a long day at work.

“I’m getting very worried. If she doesn’t get better soon, we definitely need to get her to the E.R.” Jin told you. You agreed with a slight nod.

“Mommy? Daddy?” Your little girl cried out as she walked into the living with her hand rubbing her eyes. The two of you sat up straight very quickly before rushing to the little one. “I can’t sleep.”

Jin frowned and placed a hand on her tiny shoulders. “Daddy will help you fall asleep, okay?” The little one nodded before Jin turned to you.

“You go relax, I got it this time babe.” You smiled gratefully as the two headed off to Y/D/N’s room.

As Y/D/N laid in bed, Jin laid down besides her with her head resting on his arm. “Daddy?”

“Hmm? Is something wrong love?”

Y/D/N shook her head. “No.. but daddy I want to tell you something.” Jin looked down at her confused. “I love you daddy, thank you for taking care of me.”

Jin smiled warmly. “Hey, it’s okay sweets. I’m your world wide handsome father, of course.” Y/D/N let out a small giggle before coughing. “And I love you too sweets. Mommy and daddy loves you so much.” Closing his eyes, the two fell into a very peaceful and much needed sleep.

SUGA:

The two of you had two kids, one being a 16 year old growing boy and one being a 3 year old baby girl. Your eldest was just like Yoongi, a boy who didn’t know how to show his feelings well but did it through actions. To put it in a more simple form, your son was basically a tsundere just like his father. He was very subtle when he shows that he cares and loves someone so it took you both by surprised when your son told you both that he loved you guys so openly.

It was on the night of his 16th birthday and the two of you decided to buy him a whole set of Attack on Titan seasons 1 and 2 DVDs along with the ongoing manga. Not only that, but you both took him out for dinner with his friends and family and ended it with smearing frosting on his face from the fruit cake you bought him.

Y/S/N was so overwhelmed with all the gifts and activities that took part on this day that by the time all of you guys got home, he cried. And that made you and Yoongi very worried.

“Honey, why are you crying? Is everything okay?” You asked him as he sat on the couch with his head in his hands. Yoongi sat on the other side of him as your little girl sat on the floor playing with her toys. “You know you can tell your father and I anything but if you’re not comfortable to tell us, we won’t push it on it on you to tell us.”

“N-no...” Y/S/N spoke out softly. He looked up at you both as his hands fell to his lap. “I-...” He took a deep breath. “I’m so happy. I don’t know how to say this but I’m just really grateful that I have the best parents in the world along with a cool baby sister.”

You looked at Yoongi with shock as your son continued. Yoongi smiled slightly before placing a hand on his shoulder. “I just love you guys so much. Thank you for everything.” You and Yoongi smiled and pulled him into a hug.

“We love you so much too.” Yoongi told him truthfully. Yoongi understood where your son was coming from. When Yoongi looked at his eyes, Yoongi would see himself through him, his own past self looking right back. But Yoongi was happy. His son was able to express himself far better than Yoongi ever could and he was proud of that. Yoongi thought that maybe, he did a good job at raising his son and that thought made his gummy smile show (gif).

J-HOPE:

It’s no surprise that your daughter is usually happy. From having a picturesque perfect family to amazing friends, she had it all. But the thing that she didn’t have was a loving boyfriend who knew how to treat her well. Of course, the reason being that they’re quite young. Only being 17, relationships are trial and error and it’s just an experience.

So when Y/D/N came home crying from a date she had supposedly went on with her boyfriend, Hoseok was mortified. He was confused, worried, and honestly a little bit scared. You were on a business trip so you weren’t able to help if it was for girl problems.

Quickly, Hoseok rushed to his crying daughters side and engulfed her into a hug. “Honey, is everything okay? What’s wrong?”

Y/D/N cried into his chest as her arms voluntarily wrapped themselves around her fathers body. “He- He broke up with me.”

Hobi frowned. “Oh darling...” In a slow pace, Hobi walked Y/D/N to the living room so they could sit down on the couch. “Boys are trash anyways and besides, you’re not old enough for a relationship love. I know how much you’re hurting right now and I understand exactly how you feel. You know,” He began with a smile on his face. “Your mother was the first person to break my heart.”

“Really?” Y/D/N looked up at him. 

He nodded, “Mhmm. And she’s going to be the last one at that. But the reason why she broke my heart the first time was because we just didn’t have the time.”

“Time?”

“Mmm.  We were young, just like you. And we were too busy focusing on our studies and getting ready for entrance exams that we just didn’t have time for a relationship. We were getting ready to be adults and to start our lives with a career. After we broke up, I eventually became apart of BTS and I met such amazing people.”

“My uncles...” She spoke with a soft smile. “They are amazing uncles.”

Hobi nodded. “Eventually, I met your mom again after a long time and we hit it off again. Look, honey, what I’m trying to say is that sometimes breaking up and being independent is a good thing. You should focus on yourself now, especially since you’re at the age where you should start focusing heavily on college and possible careers. Because once you have a start on your ultimate goals, then the one for you will eventually come into your life and make it an awesome journey for you.” Hobi slid his arm around your daughter’s shoulder, pulling her into a side hug.

Y/D/N sniffles had stopped and she was now understanding the reason why her boyfriend had decided to take a break. She felt a lot better now and that was all thanks to her dad. “Dad?”

“Yes, love?”

“I love you. Thank you for helping me understand.”

Hobi smiled warmly, “Of course. I’m your hope and you’re my hope. I’m always going to be there for you no matter what.” 

RM:

Namjoon was known world wide for his parenting. Of course, Namjoon himself is a smart intellectual and he knew things from right and wrong. He had his way of words, and the way he thinks is absolutely beautiful. So it’s not surprising if his kids turned out the same way as Namjoon.

His two kids are always at the top of class: they had amazing grades, and they were so down to earth that it’s almost ridiculous. They were sweet and they had such a good relationship with their parents. But as of late, Namjoon’s eldest was quieter than usual and that made Namjoon worried.

“Y/S/N, can I have a word with you?” Namjoon pulled the oldest aside as a small frown etched on his face. “Is everything okay?”

Y/S/N nodded, “Yeah.” He said quickly as he scratched the back of his head. “Why wouldn’t it be?” He laughed out a small laugh and that made Namjoon raise a brow up in concern.

“You know,” Namjoon started, his stern and parental tone coming out. “You can always tell your mother and I anything right? We’re always going to be here for you, no matter what.” Namjoon placed a hand on his son’s shoulder to assure him that he meant it. 

“Actually,” Y/S/N sighed. “I just... I feel like I could do better in school dad. I’m kind of stressed out with finals coming out and everything. And I feel like I’m not doing as well as you did in school. I feel like I’m disappointing you and mom.”

Namjoon frowned. “Y/S/ you have nothing to worry about and you are completely wrong. You have made mom and I so proud of you and we’re so happy that you’re doing great. Even if you didn’t do so well or as well as you hoped to, you’re still great in our eyes. And you are doing completely fine.” Namjoon pulled his son into a hug. “You’re doing so well Y/S/N, don’t let the pressure get to you, okay? If anything, you can always ask mom and I if you need help.”

Y/S/N sniffled into Namjoon’s shoulder. “Thank you dad. I love you.”

Namjoon smiled upon hearing those words. “I love you too, son.”

[blackgirlblues]

Being A Black Girl: And Chasing Your Dreams.. Yikes.

Hi, 

It’s me, your resident black girl back with some new shit to rant about. I’ve been posting a few screenshots of short poems and paragraphs I’ve been writing on my phone as a way to heal and get over Capricorn boy from my last post on here and I see you guys like and reblog. Thank you for showing love, although it makes me sad that so many of you seem to be going through the same range of emotions I am. I’m sorry. 

I know it’s a lonely place to be in. 

But, on the bright side, I’ve got a lot of new followers joining the diary/manual/rant page that is blackgirlology and it’s nice cause I think it’s becoming a little bit of a community. So, in a way, were never really going through any of these emotions alone. If you’ve found this page-you’re part of a community. Bask in it. 

Anyways, that aside, a lot has happened since I last spoke to you. I don’t know if any of you may remember, and for some new people this will be a surprise. But I’m actually a singer songwriter from Ireland. Moved to London a year and a half ago to pursue my music dream and that’s how I met Capricorn boy whos been the source of all my poems. 

Throughout this time in between, I’ve been trying to chase my dreams, and chase them relentlessly. and this summer i did just that, let me tell you, what im about to tell you guys, is to put it simply, wild. I’ll just cut to the chase. 

It all started in July. I’d been in London for quite a long time now, over a year and now have a manager who’s my best friend first and foremost. We’ll call her Maya. I met her in my first week of moving to London in the student halls I was staying at and we became best friends pretty quick. She studies music business, so it made sense and she just naturally ended up taking up the role as my music manager. Shes seen everything. The songs I wrote about Capricorn boy, the tears, everything. And she saw everything this summer. 

I saw an ad for a record label opportunity in London. It was advertised on my university facebook page; a new indie label, looking for demo submissions for a competition they were setting up to find their new signee. I sent a screenshot to Maya who agreed I should send my stuff in. I did, they liked it, I got a meeting, we were sent terms and conditions for the competition. We signed it, the rest was supposed to be history. 

Big yikes. 

There’s so many layers to this story that I will be shortening it, just because it can get very draining for me to talk about or even write about. I’ve healed from it i think, but I still want to put it here and write it about to finally close that chapter and be done with my feelings about what happened to me and my music. 

Basically, the whole competition, the record label, the dickhead CEO, it was all a scam. I had accidentally signed away the master rights to my new song to a record label started by a fake CEO who was committing fraud and known for tricking young artists into handing over their master rights so he could profit off of them, for power. 

It was a mess. Another contestant told me and Maya when we were outside of their office. Just minutes before we were under the impression that I was doing an interview for Billboard Magazine. Honestly, I never truly believed it. Shit was too good to be true. 

But she told us everything. How he was actually a run away from Spain, where he was caught and exposed for doing the exact same thing to artists there, how he didn’t have any money to fund the competition he had somehow roped all of us into, how he was illegally avoiding paying his team, how none of the creatives we had collaborated with for photoshoots etc were paid, how everything was a lie, how he didnt have any connections, and how he was trying to convince me specifically to sign a 360 deal with his label. 

Which, guys, I’m not stupid. After the first week of being with the label for the competition and letting my song live through their disastrous marketing campaign, Maya and I long decided that regardless of what they said, I would not under any circumstances be signing anything with any entity of their company. 

After being told the truth, I had to sit down. You see, when I came across this opportunity, I thought this was finally the life I’d been manifesting coming true. I had begun to grow in my spirituality and start journaling, writing down my manifestations, and getting to work with a record label who would later offer me a fair contract before I turn 20 was one of the manifestations I had written down every night before I went to bed. However, what I’d gotten was the exact opposite. 

I remember, me, Maya, and 2 of the girls from the competition all stood around in a circle outside of their new office that the CEO also hadnt paid for wondering what our next move would be with this new information. There was still 2 other contestants inside who had no idea what was really going on was an elaborate scam. One of them wanted to go in and expose them on the spot. I said no, we had to go in and pretend like everything was normal until we figured out what to do afterwards. 

So in I went, plastering the fakest smile on my face and pretended like I still thought I was about to be speaking with Billboard Magazine. Once I got out, I broke down in Maya’s arms. 

I went home to my flatmates, Ellie and Bea and cried for hours before I had to go work a 7 hour shift at a pizza place. 

I stayed in bed, and cried, and cried. and cried again. I didn’t get out of bed unless I needed too. The only people I talked too were my flatmates E and B and Maya. 

Everything was sorted out eventually, a lot more happened, but as I’ve been writing this article for you guys, I realised that all of that stuff is no longer relevant to my journey and isnt something I want to bring back into my energetic circle because I’ve made peace with the fact that a lot of people who betrayed me when I was at my lowest, peace with the fact that these contestants who wanted to “work together” to get out of this mess, actually wanted to save their own asses and leave me in the cold. 

But I still got out of it and I’m still here. 

I nearly got sued by a man with less than 20 pound to his company account online, but hey, I’m here.

I guess why I’m telling you guys this really short account of my summer is to both record it for myself but also to say its okay to flop, its okay to fail. I did both this summer. and thank god i did. it was the best thing that ever happened to me. 

following your dreams is scary, doing it as a black girl is terrifying because society has already kind of set you up to fail. there’s already misconceptions about what you do, who you are, where you come from and how good you’re going to be at what you do. its almost like we cant fail and we need to work 10 times harder to obtain half of what the average white person will get. and sometimes it can feel like we dont have any space to fail or make mistakes because of this but let me tell you thats not true. 

if anything, the universe will put you in places that will force you to grow through the mistakes you make. and thats exactly what happened to me this summer. 

i chased my dream so relentlessly i ended up in an environment i thought i manifested, i thought was good for me, only for the universe to show me that that specific environment i’d been wishing to be in is the furthest from what i need right now in my life. 

this so called failure showed me that not everybody who smiles can be trusted, and that people can be way more deceiving than i ever thought, especially when push comes to shove and they need to save themselves. you start to see the real them when it starts to get tense. the people who seem to be around you when you’re doing good will most likely dissapear when things start to go south, including some of your oldest friends. you will get radio silence on their end. be upset. cry. but after that be glad that this situation revealed their true colours. 

and then never put any more energy into them again. 

this failure showed me how fucking strong i am. how resilient and kind i am even in the face of disrespect and actual evil. it showed me how much i can care for someone who i believe is at a risk of losing it all, and showed me that this will not always be reciprocated. and for a while i thought that meant that i had to harden myself up and grow a shell. but i dont think so. i will not allow the things ive been through to make me into a hard person when i was born soft. i mean now, im a little rough around the edges, jagged enough to cut anyone who comes too close with some of that bad energy, but soft enough to hold myself tight and glue myself back together when i need to. soft enough to hold the people who held me this summer. soft enough to help people who i know deserve it. 

im a good person in a shitty world, i don’t need to match the world and become a shitty person to survive. 

after all of this happened, i stopped writing music. 

i haven’t written anything properly or produced anything in months and sometimes i get worried that ive completely lost my talent. but thats another thing that this failure taught me, i can never truly lose whats meant to be mine. i know that i was put on this earth to create change, to inspire, to be an activist and a voice for people who dont have one. i know i was put here to do it through a creative medium and right now i still think that is music. 

i think i just need to stop being so scared to start again, to learn my craft again.

i used to be so scared of failure but now i am so thankful for it and the lessons its taught me. i had so much hurt and pain and hatred in my heart for the universe for, in my head, doing this to me. but then i realised that the universe never does anything to you, it does it for you. all of this happened in my best interest and while i definitely didnt understand at the time, i get it now.

thank you universe for the worst summer of my life. 

and my black ass will be continuing to chase my dreams relentlessly, failing, tripping and falling on my ass until i get to the very top. 

besides, if everything had just gone right, that wouldnt have been very interesting, would it?

[clownbeep]

This is gonna be kinda brutal. But I want to put it into writing

Big vent/whats been going on

Hah... I guess this is like my life story or some shit...

Trigger warning ahead.. Depression and a bit of gore/suicide talk so if you are sensitive to that please, for your own sake and mental state you might not want to continue.

For those who dont want to hear a pretty dark vent, I understand.

And those who are just scrolling by feel free to scroll past. I just personally want to get this out.

If you have dealt with emotional neglect/abuse and need to know it isnt in your head this might be the post.

By writing this it feels like hopefully someone else will read this and realise certain things are NOT healthy.

If you are questioning if you are being emotionally neglected/abused (im speaking in a parental sense but even romantically or sexually) im not someone to give you answers, but the fact you are questioning it raises some red flags. In a healthy relationship you dont wonder those things.

Sorry for the long prelude but heres what I wanted to say

.

.

.

.

.

.

Ever since I was young, ive had bad ADHD, manic bipolar/depression, and sensory issues.

I was diagnosed around 13 I believe. My family (I didnt realise it then) always showed pity. Like I was some wild animal that couldnt be tamed and there was nothing they could do. Id do and say stupid attention seeking things just to try and get a shred of empathy.

My family didnt care.

When I was in the hospital for a suicide attempt regaurding pills and my liver had a chance of failing.. None of my family members cried over me. But a family friend. Someone not. Even. Related. Wept over me.

My family didnt care.

I cant say they never cared. They give me food water and luxuries like internet and a phone. For that I am grateful.

But in many other ways they have hurt me faar more than helped.

Once I got out of a short term stay in an inpatient mental facility I desperately needed contact with anyone who would care for me.

I have a younger sister, quite young probably around 7 at the time. She was a close friend of mine for that time. Id hang out with her so often to fill the gap in love it felt my family didnt give. One day I walked into the dining room and overheard my mother and father talking to my little sister. They told her to keep away because I wasnt "stable" because I was "dangerous" and could give her bad Ideas. And with one single action my only friend at the time and way to find happiness was taken away.

My family did not care.

When I stay in bed every day for months on end not knowing which day ill snap and end it all.... I get called lazy.

My family did not care

When I beg for medication to make me a functional human being they brush me off for years on end. Im losing my grip. I can barely remember things that have happened last week because I try so hard to forget everything its my automatic response to everything.

When I cant get to sleep because all of the memories come flooding back and im hit by wave after wave of horrific memories and the feeling if worthlessness... When I cant watch any videos or read posts about families because it brings on unwanted memories and emotions....

Is it me being dramatic then?

When you hear your family openly mocking and laughing about how stupid and dramatic and fake trans people are... How weird and unnatural and mentally insane these people are not knowing they are the very reason grsm and trans suicides are so high...

Am I a liar now? Am I insane?

When I tried to talk to them about my mental health issues. They took my only way of contact and made me feel like it was my own fault.

My family didnt care.

When I was nearly passed out shaking in a bathtub covered in wounds and blood all over... They showed pity, then lectured me for an hour for not telling them or for being impulsive and basically cleaned my wounds and sent me into my room.

My family didnt care.

Yes. I do agree, they cleaned my wounds, the physical side of showing care. However emotionally they were not there.

When my father drinks so heavilly every day he is home from work that he forgets half the things he tells you and can barely function.. They lecture my older sister for having a glass of wine (legal age)

They did not care.

My sister (23) tried for so many years to cling to what little attention she would get by getting good grades and going to college... She realised that it changed nothing about how my family felt toward her.... She snapped.

My family did not care.

She starves herself for a disease she does not have, she uses religion as an exuse to be one of the biggest christian extremists I personally know. Half the days she doesnt eat... Other days she burns book and gets rid of items for being demonic.

My lovely sister used to be kind and quite normal. However she couldnt find comfort in what little live her family gave. Starved for care she turned to religion to un unhealthy degree. Finding any way to keep her mind busy. Now I worry she will end up in the hospital for weighing so little.

My family did not care.

My oldest sister (27) Is married to a continuously cheating husband who she keeps letting back into her life. She was raised with a failing marrige and doesnt seem to see when she should call it quits.

Not to mention her husband has touched someone legally under the age of concent. Did she report him to the authorities? No.

All of these horrific things stemming from bad parenting. Unhealthy relationships and neglect.

Neglect emotionally can cause just as bad things as physical neglect. They are both horrifically dangerous in different ways.

These are the only big things I can remember... Basically age 15 and below are a complete blur to me and I cant remember much of it without thinking for a looong time. Even then I cant remember a lot of it... I feel like ive lost my whole damn childhood. And it hurts more than if they had just hit me or physically harmed me.

Im not underplaying physically harm. But in my personaly opinion I would rather my family have beaten me badly because at least then id have an easier way to prove to people how severe the abuse was. You can see bruises and confirm broken bones... But years of feeling completely useless and being shut off from most of the world other than the internet... It fucks you up in a way I dont think can be healed.

I dont know if I can ever love myself or... Remember things. Its terrifying to think Ill post this and a few weeks later probably not even rememner unless its brought up. Or meeting people and having conversations... And they are just... Gone.

Gone.

I suppose the biggest reason im writing this is well... In the future I dont want to forget in some ways.. I want like to be 100× as awesome knowing itll start as soon as im out of here..

If I dont have anything to compare it too then what is the point?

Ive layed out basically most of what I remember

A large amount of time I look around and nothing registers... Everything is familiar but I cant remember anything for a moment or two.. I feel like my memory is slipping so fast and im terrified.. I cant do anything to stop it and I cant make my mood be stable without the medication my family cant be bothered to get ...

I suppose this is a bit of a vent. I know its kind of everywhere and unorganized..

If im honest.. Tumblr is the only place where people have given me a home I wish I had..

I came out as trans here... Everyone was so damn supportive.. I didnt say anything but I cried hard and the kindness.. It was amazing.. It was such a jarring difference to how I feel when I say anything in real life.

Ive met friends here and ive had some much fun here. If youve stuck around this far thank you so much.. If you didnt I dont blame you.

I just wanted to share what has been flashing in my head these past few days.. It hurts a lot and ive even considered suicide recently..

Im trying hard. As hard as I can.. I have no escape though.

I cannot leave home. I cannot escape. Im not being dramatic.

I

CANT

LEAVE

And its terrifying because I know without medication or at least being somewhere AWAY from family.... I feel like im going to break soon.

I dont want to do anything stupid.. But some days I cant think straight and do things that harm myself and its not good. Its not okay. Im aware that I need help but I have no idea where to go/turn.. I have no ID or drivers liscence.. I have no transportation to and from a job to get money so I can leave... I live in the middle of nowhere.... I just..

I dont want to lose touch. I dont want to do anything bad.. I want to be functional.. I want to do more than eat and sleep my life away because I have nothing else to do..

Im so damn sick and tired of this all.. And at times I really do feel like there is only one way out.

Its always there and I just feel like one of these days im gonna be pushed over the edge and not be thinking clearly enough to stop it.

Im thinking semi clearly right now which is my im posting this.. Because im afraid and alone.

I have nowhere to go irl I have no friends Irl i just have tumblr and media and thats it. I dont expect anyone to be able to help I just wanted to write this so anyone knows what happens if I leave media..

If I tell my family my issues they will blow me off again for the 11th time or so (not exaggerated)

And if I do something to get sent to the hospital and get the help I need the cycle will continue with them being pissed and me getting sent home in a month or less anly for my family relationships to get worse..

Im spiraling fuether and further and I cant keep up the facade of being fine. I need help. And i have no way to get it. Ive just been suffering for years...

Sitting around and doing nothing but using your phone or drawing or whatever sound fun in theory... But if thats all youve been able to do for years with little to no real life social contact its gonna mess with your head... I dont want to be a shut in... I just

I dont know what to do.

Im sorry for rambling. I will most likely delete this later feeling embarrassed I posted this...

Im just tired..

[forallyourikemensengokuneeds]

tbh ive always been afraid of marriage (since i’m kinda young and my parents never had a good marriage and i was afraid of being like them) but hearing you speak about it so rawly? made me kind of look forward to perhaps being married. it sounds so silly but seriously hearing about you talk about it reminds me that not all marriages are bad. thank you for that. it’s been a while since i’ve thought positively about relationships like that.

Well I am seriously glad I can help that way. M and I have a pretty strong marriage in the normal sense. If you take into affect the harsh reality of military life which most people don’t understand period, we have an outstanding marriage.

I have been jealous of a machine before. I mean that was my competition for his attention, a submarine. I lived years of our marriage by myself often with two or more young children. I wouldn’t have traded a second of any of that. The last five years he was in though it was hard. He hated his job. He hated every part of everything really. It was rough and it took a toll on me and the kids.

Now he is happy and he has a job he likes so life is good on that front. The one thing that always gets me is people are like marriage is like this.... and the expect it to be just like that. It isn’t. My first marriage was horrible. He was an awful person period. He had a lot of problems. It was just not right for me or him.

M and I forged a way that made both of us happy. That is what marriage is. It is work, I won’t lie. It is sometimes 50/50 sometimes it is 5/95 it is work period. However the reward for that work is beyond wonderful. I have my best friend as the man I love and life is good.

My parents were the best of friends and well they had a good marriage. It was tough for them. My mother had hep b, cancer, and copd bedore it was called that. My father stood by her till the end and I mean that literally. He was on the other side of the hospital bed from me as she took her last breath. My oldest brother and his wife met when I was two. They have been married for 30 years last September. They are polar opposites but they forged their own way. I say this because where as I have had the best examples of a good marriage. M did not. His parents divorced when he was five. His father completely cut ties with him and his sister. His mother remarried to a serial cheater. He was brought up in a house where drinking and drugs was a normal thing. His grandparents were all divorced and hated each other. He had no basis of what marriage should be.

He is my rock. He doesn’t drink anymore except in social settings. The military kicked his drug habit long ago. He is a sarcastic asshole, smart ass, sometimes annoying(okay almost always) teasing, playful, honest man. He is all that and he is mine. By the way in no way am I perfect and he accepts that as well.

The best quote about marriage I ever heard was: marriage is simply finding the person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

That is marriage.