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#hell yea mate
endenope · 5 months
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im having omegaverse ratiorine comic ideas but it went from epic gay filthy-hot sex to heartclenching heavy angst real quick and
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eggresin · 4 months
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draw Bard from Wandersong!! projecting my new interests on you
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I love them already
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devilfated · 1 year
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i'm not gonna lie i don't always find the way the cw writers pair people up to be authentic. especially for klaus. one look at someone and he's smitten because they're attractive? then begins the slow process of getting to know them and he finds some traits he thinks are worth sticking onto? i think it takes him much more to truly care and love for someone. i like the idea of klaus and camille, but i hated the execution through and through. i like the idea of klaus and caroline, but i think there's a lot of depth missing. i think klaus and caroline was probably the most accurate, what with klaus trying to appeal to her "darker" side and caroline being repelled by him. he's a bad person and he makes no pretense for anything otherwise. i just don't see a world where he's automatically gripped by someone.
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piers-official · 1 year
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Loot get! Fat Doobie
Achievement get! Stoned Age
I uhhh thank ya??
I don't know how ta tell ya this but I really don' like smokin' pot, as much as everyone thinks.
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cigaretteparfum · 1 year
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i seem to have fallen into some kind of a rabbit hole and losing me mind at a worrying pace. people call wearing henna a cultural appropriation? when at this point it's been spread to so many different countries, all with their different takes of its usage and meaning?? why and how??? because as far as am aware the indian and arab* sailors and traders back in the day were happy to share what they got on pretty much every port they found themselves in, including henna, because ... that's kinda the point. like, yeah, am sure there are groups to whom henna holds a significant cultural and/or religious meaning, or at the very least have specific patterns that are. and there's bound to be just as many groups to whom henna is just a decorative kinda thing, to be worn for festivities or for fun, for those afternoons you're kinda bored and got too much time on your hands.
at this point you can't even call wearing henna a form of CA just based off one or two regions due to their specific meanings alone; there's like, a whole continent and a half to consider, with even the latest import happening, like, during the single or at most double-digit century. that's fucking old. not as old as like, egypt or even india sure, but still old enough to have fully be ingrained in their own cultures.
*singling out indians and arabs bc they were the two actors most relevant to how my people got introduced to henna in the first place. idk about others, lol.
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zozo-01 · 2 years
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[blinks repeatedly] being a former stem kid in business is weird.
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rosiegames · 3 months
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apex after midnight is hell … actual hell…
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geee-three · 5 months
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STOP HATING ON GEN ALPHA FOR SIMPLY EXISTING!! FUCK!!! im not chronically online for saying im genshinpilled im chronically online for playing 28 hours of genshin!!! i'm not cringe for saying rizz i'm cringe because all fourteenyearolds are cringe!!! fucking hell man. yall are NOT yammed
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youronlydarlin · 8 months
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warning: Horny Simon ig, your kitty kat coded on this one, there's smut at the end btw
M' thinkin bout a Simon Riley who's darling has cat mannerisms.
Simon's always found it ironic how you claim to be a dog person. Even going as far as to owning one while literally being the physically embodiment of a cat.
He thinks it's cute though, how you just plop yourself on his lap like it's yours it is. Stroking his pretty baby's back, amused at your satisfied moans. Other things he's observed about you were probably your lack of energy on almost everything. You'd rather sleep the day away, your eyes, down turned n' half lidded even as you convince him that your not tired.
Your feisty too, you like to bite. Giving him the most nonchalant look on the planet as if you hadn't just bit his bicep for no apparent reason. All in all, he appreciates how chill you are with most things. Hell, he doesn't even know if you give a shit about anything that goes around you, as long as it doesn't disturb your peace.
Simon calls you his, pretty kitty. Bratty to everyone, but not as much with him. But he's gotta admit how hot it is seeing you pliant, n' submissive.
"T'aww... pretty kitty. Y' lost all your bite, n'd your bark.." he laughs at you cause he's a meanie like that. Big arms wrapped around your neck as he fucks you in a headlock, all cause you got the zoomies. By zoomies I mean you got incredibly horny, n decided to suck his dick while he was asleep. S' not your fault he was hard >:(
He'll switch positions eventually, flipping you on your back, n' he's bullying his massive cock in you not a moment later. Puts you in a mating press cause he likes how you claw at his back when he drills himself in so deep, that he sees the outline of it in your stomach. Your sharp nails drawing thin red lines on Simon's back, and it fucks him up, reduced to just babbling "yea–yes. Jus' like that kitty. Jus' like that......mark me up. Fffuck.."
a/n: I was in a somewhat lazy mood when I wrote this, so meh. N e ways, hope u enjoyed this darlings! Take care of yourself always!
Yours, truly,
–dolly
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faded-euphoria · 2 years
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I can't get this out of my mind so here you go
Telling COD men they have a slutty waist
Ghost, Price, Soap, Gaz, Alejandro, Graves, Konig
TW/CW: Written as Platonic but can be seen as romantic i guess? NSFW talk, sexual implications, wounds guns and bullets are mentioned
Ghost
"You have a slutty waist" Ghost paused what he was doing as soon as the words left your mouth,"What?" He looks over to you, his mask covering the frown on his face. "Your waist. Its slutty. Very grabbable.." A scoff leaves his lips as he turns back to what he was doing before electing to ignore you.
Price
"Captain with all due respect... you have a slutty waist" You were in the middle of a mission and he had gotten shot, having to strip down for you to take care of his wound. "Private with all due respect hurry up and keep it in your pants." Smirking you replied,"Could I keep it in yours?" ..."Bloody hell."
Soap
You walked in on him lifting weights one day, he was wearing a tanktop and sweats having just gotten done with a workout. "Damn McTavish, didn't know you had such a slutty waist." Shaking his head, he lifted his shirt up exposing his abs,"Mate what?" You walked up behind him, turning him to the mirror on the wall while placing your hands on his sides. "Slutty." You stared at him, eyes trained on his torso. "I- A'right get yer hand off me," He barked, turning his head away. (you made him blush)
Gaz
"Pssst, anyone ever tell you about your slutty waist?" He looked up at you from his spot on the couch, giving you a concerned and grossed look, "You didn't just say that." A smile formed on your lips as you nodded. He let out a sigh, disappointment evident, and turned back around to his book.
Alejandro
You had just gotten to Las Almas, and at your first look at Alejandro you scanned over his body, "oh.." a small breath left you, gaining the man's attention, "you alright, my friend?" his eyes scanning over your face, "Not to be rude or anything but uh... your waist is slutty." He raised one of his eyebrows, "Oh? Perhaps you'd like to see it bare later tonight then?"
Graves
He was wearing his blue collared shirt and jeans. You smiled, eyes raking over him, a small blush taking over your cheeks. "You okay, kid?" You nod, meeting his eyes, "Yea, you just..." He steps closer to you, "I just what?" You reached out slowly, your fingertips grazing his shirt before your hands press against his sides gently, "I like your... slutty little waist." A sigh leaves his lips, as he places his hands on your arms, "You would say that..."
Konig
He was just minding his business as usual, cleaning his gun, when you walked in. "Konig, can I tell you something?" He looked up at you and nodded, "Of course." "You have a slutty little waist." He was so glad he had his hood on, if you could see how red his face was he'd be done for. "Ach du lieber Gott...Schatz, you cannot say that..."
*Ach du lieber Gott...Schatz = Oh dear God... Darling
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maplesyrupsainz · 2 months
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙“parents” | CS55˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: carlos sainz x fem reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au, established relationship
warnings: lots of fluff & play fighting!!! lol not rly much plot tbh
summary: in which your boyfriend's best friend is like a son to you
a/n: i missed writing for my bby carlos🥺🥺🥺 jus a cute casual messy one i love writing fics like this!!
request!!!: could you write a smau where reader and carlos are in a long term relationship (since before he moved to McLaren) and lando is basically their son. just some cute moments between them
my masterlist
fc: various blonde girls from pinterest
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by lilymhe, carlossainz55, and others
yourusername i made them take me ⛳️
tagged: carlossainz55, landonorris
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user1 oh to be y/n y/l/n
user2 lando's hair lol
landonorris posting this pic of me why?
yourusername what's the issue??
landonorris you know what.
yourusername cheer up mate
landonorris next time i see u 🔪.
carlossainz55 no threats of violence, please
yourusername yea lando 😨
landonorris k.
user3 LOL they love each other really.....??
lilymhe bet you showed the boys up too 👀
yourusername oh you already know
lilymhe that's my girl
carmenmmundt the outfit!!
liked by yourusername
user4 the three coffees too. yncarloslando nation rise
landonorris posted a story
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liked by carlossainz55, oscarpiastri, and others
user5 hotttt
user6 carlando crumbs
user7 where's y/n 😊💖🎀✨
user8 CARLANDO❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥
user9 do u guys ever do anything else
carlossainz55 no delete this y/n will get mad
yourusername WHY THE HELL DIDNT YOU GUYS INVITE ME
landonorris oh my bad we thought you were busy today
yourusername u horrible liars.
messages ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by carmenmmundt, lilymhe, and others
lilymhe 😍😍😍 my girl
liked by yourusername
carmenmmundt twit twoooo
liked by yourusername
alexandrasaintmleux wow.
liked by yourusername
landonorris carlos is screaming crying rocking back & forth rn
yourusername boohoo
user10 SOO HOTTT
user11 omg the most gorgeous girl ever
carlossainz55 y/n baby please forgive me wow you are the most beautiful perfect amazing girl in the world
yourusername LOL
yourusername please relax 🥰
lilymhe
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lilymhe a lil week off ✨
tagged: yourusername, alex_albon
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yourusername YAYYYYY miss u already
lilymhe wish i could see u everyday
carlossainz55 back off
lilymhe relax much?
yourusername so protective!!!
user12 this is too cute
user13 yesss a y/n mention
user14 y/n nation rise
user15 aww all my favs omg
alex_albon im last? 🤨
yourusername sucks to suck!
alex_albon evil girl
lilymhe dont fight!! there's enough of me to go round 😊
user16 LOL they are all always fighting!!!
carlossainz55
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liked by yourusername, landonorris, and others
carlossainz55 six years 🌹
tagged: yourusername
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user17 6 years already omg i remember when they first got together!!
user18 same 😭 & everyone thought she was a gold digger?? LOL
user19 imagine hahahaha
user20 everyone's fav couple
landonorris mum & dad 🥹
carlossainz55 😂😂😂
yourusername aww!!! our son!!!!
user21 LOLLLL
user22 he's like us
user23 parents fr
lilymhe gorgeous angels!!
liked by carlossainz55, yourusername
charles_leclerc ❤️
liked by carlossainz55
carmenmmundt perfect couple <3
yourusername ilysm
yourmother congratulations guys, come visit soon ❤️
carlossainz55 of course!!! we miss you guys!
yourusername 🥹❤️
yourusername I LOVE YOU!!!! so so so so so so so so much
carlossainz55 i love you so much more my sweet girl
yourusername posted a story
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liked by carmenmmundt, carlossainz55, and others
user24 goals omg
user25 me when
user26 what a problem to have!!!
user27 i want what they have omg......
landonorris u guys are too in love
yourusername make it make sense, lando
alexandrasaintmleux oh you guys make me sick!
yourusername 😝
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by landonorris, taylornation, and others
user28 OMGGGGG this makes sm sense
user29 knew u guys would be swifties
user30 i bet carlos loved it
landonorris i wasnt invited?
yourusername be serious
yourusername carlos is laughing at you right now
landonorris okay. can you tell him i miss him please
yourusername 😂 you are obsessed
yourusername
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yourusername xoxo
tagged: carlossainz55
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user31 omggg bf carlos
user32 he's so bf
user33 the third pic 😭😭😭
user34 ME WHENNNNN
francisca.cgomes the jeans?? hello?!?!?! 😍
yourusername hahahah yes you can absolutely borrow them
francisca.cgomes oh ilysm
user35 her eras tour fit🥹💖
user36 carlos is so sexyyyy
liked by yourusername
user37 NOT Y/N LIKING THIS LOL
landonorris mum & dad! 😊
yourusername you don't always have to comment this you know
landonorris can i not be proud of my parents?
carlossainz55 aww! leave him alone y/n
yourusername 🤨
user38 omg lol.
user39 oh how i love u carlando
carlossainz55 posted a story
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, and others
user40 CARLANDO
user41 omg we won
user42 my favs fr
user43 y/n is deffo always third wheeling u two
yourusername cute
carlossainz55 is this you pretending not to have fomo?
yourusername …no
carlandofan
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carlandofan carlos and lando today after the grand prix in spain! :)
tagged: landonorris, carlossainz55
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user44 omg???
user45 in love much
user46 carlando forever 🧡❤️
user47 THIS IS SO CUTE
user48 now kiss
user49 marriage
yourusername HELLO??
carlandofan Y/N?????
user50 OMG what is she doing here
yourusername my husband & my son!!!
liked by carlossainz55, landonorris
carlandofan omg y/n ily 😭
user51 she's so real for this
THE END ❤️
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Alastor x Reader - A very long mating season (doctor's appointment gone wrong)
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Masterlist
Link to pt.2
WC: 9,698
Description:
Alastor’s been acting weird for a while now, and Angel Dust calls in a friend of his, you - the only doctor in the whole pride ring - to have you take a look at him. Despite Alastor’s insistence that it’s only a bad headache, you swear on your doctor’s oath that something more is going on… (fem reader)
Warnings:
SEX, NOT scientifically accurate, me NOT a doctor, reader and Alastor boing their groins a few times so yk do what you will with that info, rut, heat, sex, sex, sex, sex, sex, blood (not that much), porn with plot, not edited
“Say, what do ya think is goin’ on with Smiles these days?” Angel Dust reclines his elbows on Husk’s bar, sipping at his drink while waiting for Charlie’s response.
“Alastor? Oh no, do you think something’s wrong with him?”
Angel tries not to roll his eyes at the princess. The poor girl, going around managing hell with a heart of gold and… seemingly zero observation skills. “Yeah Alastor! He’s been acting all weird lately. Hidin’ away at his radio tower most of the day, in his room when he’s here, never comin’ down anymore to make breakfast, not responding to my pranks! Ugh, I’ve been bored as fuck here without his crazy reactions.” 
Husk chuckles at that, pausing his cleaning. “Are you sure you miss that last part? I remember a certain someone almost getting killed several times over a joke.” 
Angel groans at the smug grin of his companion. If the damned cat wasn’t so cute he definitely wouldn’t let him get away with all his complacent remarks. 
Nifty darts out from under the bar, joining in on their discussion. Nobody bats an eye, as they were all used to the little demonness’s mannerisms by now. “Ooooh is this about Alastor? I saw him walking around and pulling at his own head earlier. He looked like he was in pain!” She giggles impishly. “Wonder what that’s all about!”
Charlie looked close to tears in worry, and without Vaggie around to help, Angel sighs, awkwardly trying to solve the tension he brought up. “Hey don’t worry ‘bout it, if you’re all noticing and it’s not just me, I know a doctor we can call up.” 
“There are doctors in hell?”
Angel snorts. “Fuck, even the princess of hell herself doesn’t know it! Yea there are doctors, or at least there’s one doctor I know of for sure. I guess most of the caretakers on earth ended up in heaven.” He twiddles with the soft tufts of milky fur on his chest. “She used to patch me up after… ya know, my work with Val and all. Not sure if she’s got experience with patients like him, but I could call her up and give it a shot.” Charlie darts into a standing position, squeezing Angel in a tight hug. He pats her shoulder hesitantly, still not used to how loving the princess was. “Yes! That’s just it Angel.” Then her sparkly eyes widened even more, sparkling brightly at a vision only she could see. “Oh Angel! Helping a friend out of the kindness in your heart! You’re already getting so close to redemption, I can feel it!” She pulls away just as quickly as she leaned in, shooting two thumbs up in his direction. “I’m counting on you for this one!”
“Yea, yea.”
Angel fumbles with the smooth buttons on his phone screen, finding her number in recents - he’d just called her a few days ago when Val worked him for 2 days straight, filling his body with his sick drugs and leaving him untreated, lying cold on the studio floor. 
“Hey toots? Yea, this is Angel calling.” 
There’s unintelligible mumbling. 
“No, it’s not for me. It’s for a… friend.”
_____________________________________________________________
You’re in your office wiping down the scarce collection of medical equipment you’ve garnered in hell. Hell’s sky casts a pomegranate glow on your figure, inflecting off the pleats in your skirt and button-up shirt. You had forgone a traditional white coat, as there was no such clothing around here. 
When you first landed in hell, you quickly realized that the social hierarchy similarly mirrored that of earths. There were the wealthy and powerful sins, celebrities - flashy, big overlords - and finally, the common people, average sinners. 
In the beginning, your optimism led you to think you could maybe become someone important. Why not try? You had an eternity in hell after all. Yet it didn’t take you long to realize that you didn’t have what it takes to be known. You weren’t a serial killer or a twisted psychopath in life. You didn’t have it in you to climb the social ladder like a cold-hearted politician.
You were a good-natured doctor who saved lives, who thrived on knowing you were the reason your patients could live comfortably. Your only flaw? You could say that curiosity was what killed the cat, or in this case, deer. You giggled, playing with the little bush of a tail you had. It was what guided you to persist through the long years of medical school despite the imposing student debts, unsympathetic parents and all. It was also what drove you to murder. 
One, just one time.
You remember the day with crystal clarity. Your boyfriend, who had tied you up and bound you to his car, which he steered off the edge of a cliff. The hot slickness of crimson liquid coating his hairline where the windshield smashed him, the horrified pried open state of his jaw, his eyes wide and searching for nothing in particular as they stung with the salt of his blood. 
The fall had miraculously loosened your ropes enough for you to wiggle out of them, hauling your scraped wrists out of the scratchy material. He begged you to help. He, who had betrayed you and planned to smuggle you away from the life you built for yourself. There was still time to call the police. His heart was beating steady and strong. You thought his body would be of better use to your research than alive.
Someone who dedicated their whole soul to saving lives, ended up in hell for taking one.
But that cruelty was a one time occurrence, and you still opted to play the good doctor in hell. You snort at the irony as you wipe down the stethoscope in your hand, then promptly set it down on the counter as your phone interrupts your reminiscent thoughts with a sudden ring. 
“Hello?”
Ah, it was Angel, a regular patient. You were fond of the spider demon. He’s saying something about a friend needing help. “Of course, could you get your friend on the phone so that I can schedule an appointment?”
Nervous laughter rings on the other side of the conversation. “Uh, here’s the thing. He doesn’t know that I’m makin’ this appointment.” 
“Oh?” Now you’re surprised.
“Listen this is gonna be a lot to ask for, and I already ask for too much outta you-.”
“Angel, you could never ask too much from me.”
You hear a shaky sigh. Then a pause. “A-Alright then, would it be ok if ya come over to the hotel and check him out there? He’s in some weird sorta pain, but he’s not the type to tell us.”
“Sure, I don’t see why not. When should I come over?” “It’s not emergent, as this has been goin’ on for a while and he’s still up and movin.’ How ‘bout tomorrow mornin’ 8:00 am? It’s gettin’ late and I’ve seen him like once today. I’m thinkin’ we should have the best luck tryna catch him after breakfast, when Charlie has him do a few tasks around the hotel.”
“Sounds good to me. Could I get a patient name?”
“Yea, Alastor.”
“Alriiiight.” You stretch out the word as you quickly jot down his name and time of the appointment. “And demon type?”
Angel snorts as though it was a funny question. You smile from the contagious sound of his entertainment, despite having no idea what was so hilarious. “...Demon type?”
“Sorry toots, I wasn’t laughin’ at ya. He’s a deer.”
“Oooh, a deer demon? Like me…” You jot that down too. “Take care, Angel. Let me know if you want me to give that ugly moth a sedative overdose!” 
Angel laughs, and you end the call on a gleeful note despite knowing that neither of you could really do anything to the overlords. Or… perhaps you could, perhaps they were made of the same perishable flesh as any other, perhaps you were letting their status outshine their mortality. Though that’s a thought for another time.
You perch yourself on top of your working chair, clicking through your VoxTek computer to file the appointment in your weekly schedule. 
Alastor. The syllables taste rich and familiar on your tongue. You swear that you’ve heard it somewhere before.
_____________________________________________________________
Alastor as in the radio demon Alastor? 
It took you a second to recognize him, as you’ve only seen him a handful of times, but once you do, you’re suddenly not so confident about today’s appointment. 
It takes everything in your power to sculpt your expression into a neutral one. You scan your eyes over your surroundings. Darkened green walls encapsulated a small bar that looked reminiscent of a casino slot machine. Angel Dust, your spider friend, and a sour-faced gray cat demon sat chatting at the bar, nervously glancing between one another and the tall man in red. Then there was the princess of hell, Charlie, and a white haired vertically challenged woman crowding the deer demon, waving their hands exaggeratedly as though they were trying to prove a point to him. 
Their heads swing in almost unison at your arrival, and you instantly realize that they must’ve been distracting him from your arrival. Right. He didn’t even know you were coming. You swallow your nerves and make your way to the bar, skin sizzling with the phantom touch of his crimson eyes on your figure. His twisted sharp grin blurred through your peripheral vision as you focused on maintaining eye contact. 
“Hey, I’m a doctor, and I’m here to-.”
“Eek! You’re here!” Before you could even offer your hand for a shake, Charlie all but sprints at you, interrupting you with a tight hug. You blink away the strands of her hair that caught in your eyes from the swirl of the motion. 
“Hello, Princess Charlie.” You wave politely. This was your first time meeting any sort of royalty in hell, although she wasn’t nearly as intimidating as the strawberry-haired demon situated behind her.
“I’m so so excited to have you here and oh! Are you by chance interested in joining our hotel? My hope is for sinners to be redeemed-.”
“Charlie.” The short white-haired girl lays her hand on Charlie’s arm. “Let’s not forget what she’s here to do, babe.” She must be her girlfriend.
White-hair shortie directs her attention to you. “Vaggie, nice to meet you.” She keeps her introduction short and sweet, gently pushing at Charlie once again, reminding her to inform you of the situation.
“Right, right. So, you’re here, the best and only doctor in the entire pride ring to help our friend who’s been struggling a bit.” You keep a cordial smile plastered on your cheeks as she talks. In the back of the room, you see Angel now working at distracting Alastor from leaving. Impatience begins to tug at your heartstrings, pleading the princess to keep it short. You didn’t want to fail so soon.  “...And we’re just really worried! He’s been having pains apparently, in his head. Headaches.”
You turn to look at said demon, who was still sitting atop the same bar stool, perched so stiffly that you could feel the secondhand pain of his muscles that must be aching. There’s a slight swishing of his tail, and he clutches what appeared to be his radio stick tightly with one clawed hand. Was he nervous? Your eyes sweep over the sweat beading under swept bangs, and the clenching of his teeth. Ah. It must be his “condition.” 
“Alright, Princess. I can tell you all really care for your friend. Just leave the rest to me.” You squeeze her shoulder warmly, guessing that she must be fond of physical affection. She grins delightedly at you.
“Great! This is so so so good. Thank the devil! I’ll leave you to that then! Best of luck! Not that you’ll need it or anything.” You keep waving at the princess until she disappears beyond the door, watching as she spun around several times to match your waves. 
You were equal parts burning with the need to get things started, and dreadful of approaching the menacing demon, who had resigned his attempts of fleeing. You walk carefully, tiptoeing as though you were advancing toward a frightened animal. Angel Dust - and the grumpy cat - look at one another, and finally dash away, after making what you assumed to be some sort of excuse to Alastor. 
He doesn’t look at you at all, instead choosing to stare straight ahead with that abnormally wide strained smile of his - if not for the slight twitching of his ears, you would think he’s not even aware of your presence. 
You clear your throat nervously, flexing your forearm to prevent it from trembling before holding it out for a handshake. If the rumors were correct, and you had no doubt they were, you certainly didn’t want to lose the radio demon’s respect; especially not in the first meeting. 
“Hello, you’re Alastor, the radio demon aren’t you? I-It’s nice to finally meet you!” Well, you were never that good at first impressions anyway.
For a moment you think you hear him sigh, a static-filled gravely sound. Nearly imperceptible. Then he’s turning to you, reluctantly reaching his hand to yours at a snail-like pace. You try not to feel too rejected. Or feel too mocked by the seemingly ever-present grin on his face, and the clear scrutiny in his eyes. 
“Likewise, my dear. It’s always a pleasant surprise to meet another deer demon in hell, given their supposed rarity. ”
You had an impression this was far from pleasant for him. Maybe he doesn’t want competition? You snort, brushing that thought away. As though a low-level sinner like you could be a threat. “Ah, right.” You playfully flick the fur of an ear, trying to lower the tension. His darkened eyes follow the motion of your hand. “I barely remember that I am a deer demon sometimes! Everything is the same as when I was human, except for the addition of some ears and a tail.”
His grin turns sharper, with the cutting flavor of something uncomfortable. “I assure you dear, you are very much not human. I can tell.” 
“...Right.” You close your eyes briefly, willing yourself into a more business mindset so as to ignore how awkward the whole situation felt. “So, could I get a description of your symptoms? I know Charlie told me, but I want to hear it straight from the source.”
You smile encouragingly at him, as you often did with difficult patients while alive. And you had a feeling Alastor was every bit of that - a difficult patient.
He straightens up, losing the slight hint of ease he’d started to gain. “Well, it is like I said. I seem to be experiencing pains in my… head.” He winces a little - likely due to said head pains, you note.
“And how long have you been experiencing these pains?” You lean against the edge of the stool next to him, not quite sitting on it but not standing either. 
Your ears twitch at the subtle creak in his stool. He’s shifting around again. “...Around three months.”
Your eyes widen, pushing yourself off the stool. “Three months! Why didn’t you say anything…?” You quickly shut yourself up before you could cross any boundaries, silently scolding yourself for the overt reaction.
“The pain wasn’t that bad.”
He’s lying. You narrow your eyes to warn him, you can tell.
He tries again. “...I assumed the pain would go away on its own.” 
“And not get worse?” 
He gives an affirmative nod. You ask him several questions after that, trying to get a quick history of his health complications during his time in hell. With each question he answers, you find yourself only getting farther from any sort of possible conclusion. 
As soon as you started working as a solo doctor in hell, you learned really quickly that demons rarely suffered from the same ailments as people did above on earth, and if they did their symptoms were different. Your mind rushes through illnesses other demons had visited you for - a snake demon who couldn’t get his skin to shed properly, a cyclops demon who grew an extra eye that blocked the vision of her original eye, a volcanic demon whose lava had leaked to his internal organs and started burning him from the inside…
What about deer demons? Little was known about them, to the point where you were even unsure of your own biology.
You bring a finger to your lips, chewing on your nail while thinking of your next steps. The curiosity within you begged to think of a conclusion, or even just a premise. Nothing. You finally pull your finger away from your lips, remembering where you are. Right. There’s no need to overthink things. You haven’t even done a physical examination yet. Speaking of which…
You gesture for him to stand up, regretting the motion immediately as his gaze turns displeased; likely at your attempt to order him. “Alastor, would you lead the way to a more private space?” His ears straightened, and he looked at you defensively. Why did your words never come out right? You blush and wave your hands back and forth in denial. “N-no, not - I meant for your physical examination.” 
Thankfully, he ignores your blunder. Nothing about his steady grin and lidded scarlet eyes revealed what he thought. “Right this way then.” 
You timidly follow after him.
Have you gotten so rusty during your time in hell that you couldn’t even talk to a patient without turning into a blubbering mess? You’ve only been here for a decade… or two… three decades. In that time, you’ve met with all sorts of patients, from lowly sinners to more powerful overlords. He’s tall, you observe. Very tall - almost 7 feet? Over? It shouldn’t intimidate you, he was far from the tallest demon you’ve encountered. 
But they didn’t tower over you. They didn’t have his same opposing presence, which unfairly dominated the entire room with its sheer power, and they certainly didn’t have… they didn’t have his… 
…scent.
Your knees go soft at the same moment he comes to a sudden halt, causing you to bump your body into his. Your forehead bumps into the hard bone of his scapula, startled hands reaching out to steady yourself by gripping onto his suit. He twists his head acutely to look at you, and you flinch, preparing yourself for his notorious anger, but you are only met with discomfort in his eyes. You hurriedly distance yourself from the demon. 
His jaw clenches and unclenches, and he’s looking at you as though he’s holding back from killing you right then and there. A strange, almost pleasant shiver runs through your body. You blink. What a strange response to potential danger.
Before you had time to apologize - for what, you don’t know you just feel like you’ve wronged him somehow - he masks his irritation with the same cheeriness in his smile. “And we’re here! Will my bedroom be a good enough space for your physical examination, dear?”
You swallow back the ever-growing weird feeling inside you. “Yeah, of course.” 
He hums an old-fashioned tune as he walks into his room, sharp clacks of his shoes dulling down on the red carpet that covered his bedroom floor. Your curious eyes catch two red armchairs, several deer skulls hanging ominously on the walls, a large maroon bed that was so neatly made it looked to be a mere display, and the soft glow of a swamp surrounded by forest trees in the distance. 
You unpack the equipment you carried with you - stethoscope, thermometer, gloves, examination light, cotton balls. You left your less earthly conventional items back in your office, as you had absolutely no idea whether they would be of use. Each new patient meant you had to study and adapt to their unique anatomical features and curses, on top of your prior anatomical knowledge. 
Alastor stays silent the entire time you rummage through your materials, except for the occasional thump of his tail on the bed sheets and the consistent hum of jazz and radio static, which was periodically interrupted by sharp pops. You smile internally at the flattening of his ears; he must be really annoyed by that hyperactive tail of his huh? Personally, you were quite fond of your own. But you could see why a man like Alastor would be bothered by this. 
You pull on your gloves, starting to settle into a comfortable pace. All is going well, you reassure yourself. All except for the weird musky smell from him that kept tugging unexpectedly at your insides. Better not breathe all that in. He could be contagious.
You pull out a thermometer. “Alright, I’m going to take your temperature ok…?"
He simply nods. So quiet today, especially for a man who never seemed to shut up on his infamous radio broadcast. 
Just when you think he couldn’t get any rigid, you see him stop dead at your hand cupping his chin. “Open your mouth for me…” His claws tear into the bed sheets beneath, and you pat his shoulder, trying to get him to relax. His tail furiously thumps against the sheets. Oh. He doesn’t want you to touch him. 
You remove your hand from his chin and manage to take his temperature, dipping the oral thermometer beneath his tongue. You could practically feel the heat emanating off his skin onto your hand. It would be surprising if he didn’t have a fever. “Since demons all have varying levels of body heat, I can only measure fevers by comparing them to your baseline temperature. I’d say you definitely have one based on your appearance alone…” You pull out your notepad. “...But I still need to record the results for future reference.” 
You might as well be talking to yourself. You didn’t mind it though, given that you were trying to ignore his overbearing presence. “Now, I’m going to examine your eyes and ears.” You take out your light and gently gesture for him to look upward. At least he was complying now. Eyes seem normal, just as evil and red as a demon’s eyes should be. You move to his ears, which you didn’t even dare to touch based on the sudden cautioning glare he was shooting at you. 
“Don’t worry, I won’t touch anything.” You smile non threateningly before shining the light at his ears, humming as you peeped inside. They quiver, the fur slightly brushing against the head of your examination light. 
“Hmm, nothing there either…” You rummage through your bag, pulling out your stethoscope. He narrows his already lidded eyes in distaste. “I’m going to have to make some contact with it… but I’ll be fast I promise. Just tell me if you want me to pull away.”
He grits his smiling teeth, finally speaking up for the first time during the whole appointment. “You will not be coming near me with that… thing.” You’re taken aback as he suddenly stands up, brushing off his coat. A single droplet of sweat runs down his clenched jawline. “I did not require such a ridiculous examination in the first place.” He’s trying desperately to keep up his usual buoyant facade. But his frustration, at something, kept breaking through the surface. “I’ll be perfectly swell in due time! Tell the princess that these pains are nothing and it will resolve itself.” 
You panic, reaching out to grasp at his lapels before you could even think about it. You’ve never had a patient leave untreated. “Wait! Alastor, I can’t just let you go like that. As a doctor, at least let me try to help!” The second you make contact with him, you watch in horror as his face twists into something truly terrifying. Crack! There’s a breaking sound, then his form twists, joints lengthening asymmetrically with frightening speed until he dwarfed you by at least an additional 3 feet. He leans down to stare you in the eye. You’re unable to look away from the morbidly glitching radio dials. “You can’t help me. Nothing you do will ever be of use to my situation. It would help me more, in fact, if you left this very instant.”
…What did he say? 
Nothing you do will ever be of use to my situation.
Nothing you do will ever be good enough.
Just like they told you when you started medical school all those decades ago. 
You don’t even notice that you’re crying until you’ve been standing there wordless for so long that his demonic form has slowly, inch by inch shrunken to his original self. You don’t even notice that your vision is blurry. All you felt was defeat. Humiliation, rather. Who were you to think that you could help an overlord in any way? You weren’t even qualified to be a doctor down here in hell. No one is. You just thought you’d try. That’s all.
The ball at the pit of your throat tightens until you can barely breathe from concentrating on stopping the traitorous tears salting your cheeks. Distantly, through the muffled ringing in your ears and erratic static engulfing the room, you hear a low exhale. 
Could you get any more pathetic? You hold your breath when you feel a single clawed finger wiping at the stabbing fluids running down your face, each one hot and heavy with shame. You blink to clear your teary vision, and you see him looking down on you with an unreadable expression.
Apologetic? No, why would a man like him say sorry? Besides, he had nothing to be sorry for. He was correct in his reaction, you really couldn’t do anything to help. You just had to go and cry about it afterwards. Fuck. You sniffle pathetically, 
He speaks softly, the dense static lessening in volume. “There’s no need to shed tears over something that is not your fault.”
It doesn’t help. You didn’t cry often, but once the tears started it was difficult to stop. He lets his hand drop to his side and moves back to his previous position on the edge of his bed. 
“This isn’t something you can help me with, my dear. It’s an unpleasant condition I’ve had to suffer every year since I landed in hell, and nothing but waiting it out would help. This year just happens to be… more difficult than the others.” 
“Y-You’ve… had to go through this every year?” You picture the pain he must go through, and the empathy within you instantly felt for his hardships. What type of horrible things did he do on earth to deserve this? You snort with your trembling voice at your ridiculous question. You’re in hell, dumbass. What do you think?
“Every year.”
“Well, m-maybe I can help and we just don’t know it yet. Let me try, at least?” Hope dares to grace your mind, and the tears, although still running down your face, slow to a trickle.
He hesitates. He’s going to say no, isn’t he? That’s alright, you’ll do everything in your power to research deer demon biology on your own time. “You may try.” 
You blink in surprise, and your lips slowly twitch upward into a forming smile, despite the liquid sorrow still lining your eyes. In contrast to his uneasy expression, his tail thumps lightly at your grin. You find it… cute how closely the movements of his tail matched his feelings.
You pull out your stethoscope once again, attaching the tips of the headset to your ears. You glance at him for permission one more time, and he tilts his head with a disconcertingly wide grin as though to feign nonchalance. His flattened ears and tight fists however, told another story. Nonetheless, he compliantly unbuttons the top of his shirt and looks to the side, lying on his back. You smile apologetically and gently press the stethoscope to the skin of his chest.
Heartbeat… was sound. Slightly quick, likely due to current discomfort. You move the stethoscope around his chest, and you hear what sounded suspiciously like a breathy gasp. Focusing on your work, you dismiss it as a background noise. Lungs seem normal. 
Your own heartbeat is starting to quicken, for a reason other than the sniffles that had dulled to an occasional disturbance during your examination. His scent. Your eyes nearly tear up again from the effort not to breathe him in from your proximity. You feel the gummy walls lining your mouth salivate, the sticky fluid pooling in the crevices of your teeth. Was this possibly a symptom? Perhaps he was contagious after all, and the illness was an airborne one. You think back to a time when you had to treat a cloud-like demon who was overly condensed with liquids; and the very next day, you found that you’ve contracted a similar ailment yourself, your entire face bloated with an excess of fluid.
Perhaps that was Alastor’s case as well?
You should’ve brought a face mask. You move the stethoscope lower to his abdomen. Digestive track… you press the diaphragm tighter against his lower abs to get a better read. 
This time, the low noise that escaped his throat was almost impossible to miss. The strange feeling inside you squirms at the sound, but you clear your head of any dirty images, knowing that the radio demon was famed for not being interested in anything of that matter. Right. He’s most likely just in pain. Stay professional. You shift the stethoscope around, searching for a sound. Don’t make this moment any longer than it already is, you pray to no entity in particular.   
You move further down, still not hearing a sound from his digestive tract. Was that the issue here? He’s been having a rough time because there’s issues with his digestion? Well, that would certainly explain his reluctance to admit his illness. 
You’re so focused on listening that you don’t notice the gasps through gritted teeth rising in volume, relentless shifting of the demon beneath you, or the way your head, leaning ever so close to his skin in an unconscious effort to move closer to the stethoscope, was fastly approaching a forbidden area. Not even the heated gentle graze of suit fabric brushing against your chin interrupted your concentration. Neither did a strangled static-filled noise piercing the air. 
It was only when you felt the sudden assault of rough cloth, covering something pulsing warm and hard, colliding into your cheek did you finally blink in surprise, dropping the bottom half of your stethoscope in your haste. 
You stand up in a flurry, fluttering your lashes in disbelief as Alastor, the infamous feared radio demon overlord you only just met today, laid on his bed beneath you bucking his hips shallowly into the air where your face was a moment prior. His teeth are clenched so hard crimson black liquid drizzles over his gums and soaks the lapels of his suit. His eyes twitch along with his flattened ears, flickering and crazed, while his claws have shredded what was left of his bed sheets at this point.
“A-Alastor…?” 
His voice turns into something inhuman, growls layered with the eerie buzz of static. Before you could fully process the situation, he encircles a hand around your wrist, gripping you with bruising force to land on top of him. His arms encircle you, sinking his claws into your hips. Fuck, that hurt. But… you let yourself breath in his scent at last, having let your guard down with the suddenness of his movement. The effect was immediate. It felt as though you’ve given yourself a tranquilizer, with the way your muscles seemed to suddenly fail you and you melt submissively like butter into his hold. 
He tosses you onto all fours, and your elbows knock into one another as you strain to hold yourself upright. The dizzying, all-consuming fog of heat building within you and permeating each of your senses with its presence was all too foreign for you. Your mind scrambles, losing all progress of diagnostic thoughts. You wanted to pull away, to get him to calm down so you… could… talk…
That was the last of your conscious thoughts as you feel yourself slip into some sort of hypnotic bliss. He pulls your skirt to the side swiftly, pressing his hips to yours, the movement coarse and sloppy. The noise he lets out at the contact is depraved. 
“Darling… I’m just going to stay here for a bit… ngh - just for a bit.”
For a moment, he simply stays still, staticky gasps breathing hot on the back of your ears. He played with your tail, which was shaking back and forth with a mind of its own. You arch your back needily, pressing into him and prompting him to growl and finally hump into your heat. 
Was he saying something? You couldn’t tell with the way your brain had gone soft. An internal, animalistic voice told you to not think. Just part your legs and let the buck behind you have his way, it says. You whimper, the soft sounds slightly muffled by Alastor’s pillow - his pillow, which smells deeply, intoxicatingly, irrevocably like him. You’ve only met him today, but he was safe. The voice tells you that he’s yours, he’s going to protect you, he’s going to mate you.
He snarls into your ear at your needy whimpers, roughly jerking his hips into yours repeatedly. You whine, feeling the heat inside your abdomen crescendo into a sudden pain. You need him. You need more of him.
“A..Al…astor…hah… p-lease I need mo-re…” Your words fall apart with each thrust of his clothed cock over your soaked pussy, eyes starting to water with the frustration of not having his cock fill your aching hole.
In your heat-ridden mind, there was nothing you could think of but the insatiable need to be fucked dumb until you were filled by something. You cried in disappointment at not knowing what to ask. You try, you really do, but you can’t remember what the two of you were doing before this for the life of you. You gather enough strength in your ragdoll limbs to twist your neck at him, hand clumsily reaching for his pants. 
Then he stops.
He fucking stops.
Like a spell being broken, Alastor’s movements stutter to a halt the second your finger touches his zipper. He tears himself away from you, breaths shaky as he steps backward. It takes your dumbed-down consciousness a few moments to register what was happening. Your eyelids, which have begun to stick together from the adhesive of your dried tears, pry open ungracefully.
No. No, no, no, no, no! The fire in your abdomen twisted and turned, threatening to consume you whole with its intensity. He can’t leave now. No! You whine in protest, but he’s avoiding all eye contact with you. The bare skin on your hips were damp, and you realize it must be from the sweat you now see dripping off his skin in torrents. His mouth is twisted irregularly wide, even for him, as though he were pouring his all into maintaining his composure.
“My dear, I’m afraid I lost control of myself there. I do apologize, but right now you need to leave.”
You whimper, still stupidly reaching for him. Why would you leave? He’s right there. You need him, and you can smell, with a frightening accuracy you’ve never previously noticed in yourself, the desperation rolling off him. You climb toward him needily, pawing for his well-endowed girth, still twitching and hard under the offensive cloth, begging to be freed. 
“LEAVE.”
He didn’t take so kindly to your advances this time. With a single blink of an eye, you were torn away from your potential release and thrusted into the hallway, where you landed on your bottom, legs folded under one another and ears pressed against your head, staring at Alastor’s shut door with dazed eyes and unfulfilled burning in your womb.
Shit. As your mind clears and you tune into your surroundings - the red, flickering lights of the hallway and coarse texture of the rug beneath you - you think of the diagnosis that’s been right under your nose (literally) this whole time. You’ve dealt with animal patients before.
Yearly pains, usually lasting several months. Signs of fever. Changing behavior. Your heated reaction to his condition, the supposed contagiousness of it all. You’ve been blind as a deer in headlights. 
Alastor was in a rut.
_____________________________________________________________
Alastor thought that he'd gotten used to his ruts. That he would be able to handle his issues himself for the rest of eternity. 
It’s been nearly a century since he’s landed in hell, nearly a century since the torture began.
The first time the feeling hit him, it had been a complete shock. The feeling was foreign and intrusive; and while he had gotten used to his new height, physical animal features and sudden craving for cannibalism rather quickly, this cursed feeling was an entirely different field of issues altogether. 
He’s never been interested in sexual intercourse with another. Of course he knew what desire meant, but his own sense of desire had been so low throughout his life he barely needed to even touch himself. The small, infrequent bouts of want he experienced as a human was nothing like the searing hot whip of desperation that would haunt him in hell. He found it amusing, in an unpleasant sickening way; the way he thought himself to be entirely fearless, unaffected by what usually frightened others, yet the higher ups still ended up finding the one thing that bothered him and used it to punish his dead soul. 
He maintains the same grin and duties he had to attend to normally, albeit with a stiffer posture and less patient remarks. He didn’t touch himself. He had found out the hard way, during his first year, that touching himself would only increase the desire to an unbearable point and draw out the rut that much longer.
So he’d suffer through day by day, ignoring the itching in his antlers and the yearning confined in his slacks. 
Unfortunately, he’s come to the realization that each year without a mate, the duration of his rut would last longer than the previous. This year had been the longest yet, and given how fast time seemed to pass when he was not in a rut, it felt as though barely any weeks had passed since his last rut. If he were being honest, perhaps five months would be a better guess than three. Still, he followed the same rule he always did: do not give into the urges by having another, or make it worse by touching himself. It was his way of maintaining some semblance of control down in the depths of hell, where he found himself chained to not only a master but these unfavorable urges of his.
Though it was easier said than done. Many times he’s found himself unable to keep his composure, excusing himself from breakfast with the others, locking himself in his radio tower for days working on scripts, killing any scum who walked his way, doing anything to distract himself from the treacherous burning in his crotch. Anything to stop the inevitable bucking of his hips into nothing as his lower half takes on a mind of its own, wretchedly trying to catch a surface, any surface, to grind on.
Just when he finally got himself under enough control to sit at the bar for a drink, his hotel friends join him. Usually this was not a disturbance, yet the way they all seemed interested only in talking to him did strike his suspicion. People never initiated conversations with him, unless it was to foolishly challenge him to a fight. Not even his supposed friends, who had grown cordial enough with him over time but still maintained a comfortable distance.
Yet here they were, taking turns talking to him as though they’ve been doing the same congenial routine since he got here. Suspicious indeed!
He smelled her before he saw her. A sweet, tantalizing scent which wriggled into his throat and squeezed, causing him to stiffen his muscles and lid his eyes. She’s a doe. He realizes this all too late as he finds her standing in the doorway, bathing in the mouth-watering scent. The sudden flash of pain in his pupils alerts his companions, but not before they too, notice the girl.
He wanted to leave then, and really he could do so if he wished. Vaggie and Angel Dust couldn’t defeat him, and Husk was under his control anyway. But the traitorous need to get more of that delectable scent wafting off her body in waves was too strong for him to ignore. He’d only stay a few minutes more, he promises himself that. 
A few minutes turn into 10, and suddenly he’s all alone with her. 
A doctor. How ironic! She claims to hold the cure to his miseries, all the while not knowing that she had become part of the cause. Her presence was nearly unbearable to him who’d been in a rut for so long without a mate, and Alastor had to physically force himself to sit still by digging a claw into the meat of his thigh. She doesn’t notice his dilemma, nor does she notice the subtle crossing of his legs to hide the bulge of his painfully erect member, that had started leaking profusely into his slacks.
He plays the part of a gentleman the best he could, warning her with his eyes to maintain her distance. The poor girl was nervous and self-conscious, he could feel that. Normally he’d never care, but the damned hormones that influenced his thinking during his rut told him to soothe her, to assure her that everything would be ok, as tears quiver down her face. It was disgusting, the feeling of wanting to protect another. Disgusting, but also oh so right.
He held back when she accidentally touched him in the hallway. He held back, when she leaned in uncomfortably close, checking his temperature. He held back when she turned around, revealing her twitching tail and skirt that would be so easy for him to tear away and have his way with her. 
Yet he knew the unavoidable situation that would occur as soon as she had him lay down on his back, stethoscope in hand. He couldn’t help it. Each touch of her cool, gloved fingers pressing against his too-heated skin felt like the bitter promise of heaven for a soul deep in the trenches of hell. 
When her face is that close to the throbbing, aching part of his lower half, there was nothing he could do as a sharp sting of pleasure shot through his brain. He bucks his hips upward, body spasming and entirely fatigued from the many decades of having denied himself his biology. 
Why was he doing this again? At this point, who was he fighting against? Was he proving a point to the higher ups, letting them witness his impressive self control? Or was he torturing himself, making himself a fool by adding to the pain they already gave him? 
In the midst of his dilemma, he hadn’t noticed the way he grabbed her body and threw her onto the bed, nearly humping his hips into hers. He had been pent up for so long that he couldn’t even feel the pleasure initially, because his body was so used to him denying it. But when she turns her head to him, reaching out to touch him, looking at him with hazy, needy eyes…
Yes, that snaps him out of his thoughts. He must be out of his mind. After surviving a whole century of this torture, now he was letting go of himself all because he was put in front of another deer demon? 
He forgoes being courteous and removes her from his room as fast as he could, not giving the animal part of his brain a single second to change its mind. 
As soon as she was out, and he made sure his door was locked, he let out a pained growl, nearly crawling away from the door. His antlers lengthened, form twisted, the more animalistic part of him cries out in anger. Anger at himself, for throwing out his only chance at relief. His cock feels nearly numb with pain, growing in need from the narrow encounter a few moments prior. Resigning to his fate, he shakily unbuckles his pants, refusing to rip them off like he truly wanted to, for the sake of the little dignity left inside him. Rationally, he knew he was about to make things worse, but his instincts fed lies to him, telling him that this would make it all better.
Before he could even begin touching his leaking cock, he heard her. More specifically, he could hear her broken whimpers through the wooden material of his door, echoing needily through his head. Her scent had grown even stronger if possible. It was mind-numbingly sweet, despite the intensity being anything but so. He must’ve sent her into a heat, he realizes. 
This was going to… complicate things. Although Alastor could take care of himself, and was prepared to do so for the rest of his time in hell, he couldn’t let her - his doe - suffer from something he caused. Especially not with his current state of mind, where every molecule of his being told him to protect her. His mate. 
Then he hears the unmistakable slick sound of small fingers thrusting into something wet, and his ears stand pin straight as they turn to the door. 
He decides that the devil has tested him enough.
_____________________________________________________________
You’re leaning on the shut door of Alastor’s bedroom, sweat pooling in the thin threads of your clothing. Through the door, your head was clear enough to think; but that didn’t stop the incessant heat pooling between your thighs, attempting to suction all your attention toward one thing and one thing only.
Was this the type of pain Alastor has been in this whole time? You whimper, rubbing yourself depravedly against the rough carpet beneath you. 
There was nowhere to go. You were in no state to ask Charlie and the others for a room of your own, and you wouldn’t be able to tear yourself away from the scent of him if you tried. You mewl as you ground yourself in just the right spot - but the usual satisfaction didn’t come. Frustrated, you try grinding yourself harder into the carpet, ears alert for any noises you might catch from beyond his door. You hear the unzipping of his pants, and you cry, feeling almost betrayed at the sound of him. Shakily, you tuck your fingers beneath your skirt and plunge your fingers into your entrance, letting your fingers fill the gushing cavity.
You moan at the glimmer of relief, then immediately sigh in frustration as your fingers did absolutely nothing to quell the ache. 
The door rips open. 
“Alastor?” You blink wearily up at the disheveled demon, all seven feet of him glaring down at you. It doesn’t even register you to feel embarrassed at this point, with your hand still stuffed under your skirt in an obvious act of self-pleasuring. 
In a blink, the ground beneath you disappeared. Black smoke claws at your lungs and you squeal, finding yourself reappearing into existence on a plush crimson mattress. He materializes in front of you, breathing inconsistent and ragged, the radio static heavy in his voice. 
“Darling…” He encircles your wet thighs with his damp gloves, leaning over your so closely you could feel his sweat drip onto you. He leans his forehead on yours, the flush on both your faces matching in color. “I need-.”
You pull him down by his hair before he could speak, tiring of the whole waiting game. You didn’t want to hear a whole speech, all you wanted was to have him rail you so deeply into the bed you’d forget who was who. His lips crash onto yours, and you kiss him furiously, the heated passion arising from natural biological need stronger than anything you’ve ever felt with a human man.
He groans into your mouth, spreading your legs with his knees, and slots his cock desperately into your soaked pussy. This time, you don’t give him enough time to pull away before you hurriedly work at the zipper. The moment your hands wrap around his member, hotter than the rest of him even, he lets out the most depraved noise you’ve ever heard another make. To think that you would’ve heard such a thing from the radio demon seemed nearly incomprehensible just a few hours ago. 
He takes control again then, flipping you haphazardly into the four-legged position you had assumed earlier. There was no need to prepare anything - the both of you were leaking so much that you were sure he could slip in without any pain, despite his impressive size - but still he hesitates, pausing with his tip at your entrance. It twitches against your slick.
He must be thinking again, you realize. Thinking dangerous thoughts, that would take away your relief. You weren’t going to let him stop this time, especially knowing now how badly he needed it.
“Alastor if you don’t put it in right now-.” 
He growls, each rivet of the sound layered with radio static. Without another word, he thrusts his whole length in. Or at least you thought it was the whole thing. But when he doesn’t move, and you peek curiously at the junction between you two, you realize with fascinated horror that he was only halfway in. 
You keep your neck in that twisted position, wanting to watch his face while he waits for your walls to loosen enough to take the rest of him. Instead of looking away, like he’d done so while trying to hide his condition, he stares straight into your eyes with his piercing blackened gaze. Between his dark eyes, the slightly lowered grin, lengthened antlers and bloody drool slipping down his chin, he almost felt more animal than person. Especially given the complete silence, aside from his staticky heavy panting. Like he was incapable of speaking at the moment.
The enchanting stare-off between the two of you was interrupted by a sudden sharp thrust from him, causing your head to tilt back as you ground out another whimper. There’s a loud smack as his balls hit the base of your pussy. Something wet drips on your bare shoulder blades, where his claws had torn off the top of your shirt. It’s from his mouth, you realize. His hot breath condenses on the back of your neck, and without warning, you feel the entire top row of his teeth sinking into your skin followed closely by a guttural moan. You half scream, half moan at that, and you feel the lips on your neck curl into a grin.
He starts moving his hips; back and forth, back and forth. Little white specks dot your vision, which was blackened as your eyelids reflexively shut from the overwhelming pleasure. Your brain shuts off, the only things you could feel being the throbbing yet fulfilling sensation of his teeth digging into your neck, the warm rivulets of your own blood running down your sides, his claws shredding into your hips, and of course the maddening gratification of his cock repeatedly drilling into your hole.
This heat thing- no, he was turning you into a hedonist. You feel his teeth momentarily pull out of your skin to lick at the blood trickling from your wound, your heartbeat helping gush the red fluid out in erratic waves. There’s a gulp; he’s swallowing, drinking the blood out of your body as he never stops thrusting. 
He pulls his teeth out and suddenly flips you around, cock still thrusted deep into your womb. You get a good look of his face, his eyes half-lidded, pupils an endless reddish black void, smile dripping with a mix of his natural darkened bloody spit and the fresh, vibrant red of your blood. He leans in, pressing the salty iron on his lips to yours. You, in all your heat-dazed mind and curiosity, let him thrust his tongue into the cavern of your mouth, invading your tastebuds with something musky and bitter, mixed well with  a pulsing sweet irony taste. 
You’re tasting him on your tongue. Him and you, together. You must really be fucked dumb because that’s the thought that brings you over the edge, body stilling as a cry rips from your throat, choking on the blood that had started to clot in your throat. Your walls spasm wildly around his length, causing him to thrust faster.
He fucks into your limp body on the bed, a look of deep concentration on his face as he works to overcome a century of not having orgasmed. He cums without any warning, face frozen into the same smile he always wore. He doesn’t want you to see him come undone. 
Your breaths begin to steady as he clings onto your hips, spurting endless amounts of sperm into your body. It never seemed to end. Each time you thought he was done, his hips would convulse and you’d feel another bout of liquid fill your womb. You reach a shaky hand to pet the bulge that filled your lower abdomen, your innards being stretched uncomfortably full from the girth of his knot and endless cum. He glances at you then, almost sheepishly. Almost apologetically, like he’s doing something wrong. You caress his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.
You speak up. “That was… not what I expected when I arranged this appointment.” 
He stares at you in what looks like amusement.
It’s only now, in the aftermath of your session, that you notice how much of your blood was coating your skin, forming a thin, sticky layer. Yet he showed no signs of stopping, the same deranged grin gracing his face as the one that was there when you first started speaking. 
“I apologize dear, but it seems that we are far from done.”
He digs his teeth into your abdomen now, savoring the taste of iron on his tongue. You hiss in pain, twisting your body on the sheets as though to avoid his assault. But he maintains a firm grip on your sides, and you give in, letting the pleasure of being under his control overtake the pain. He sinks his teeth deeper, and there’s a weird tingling sensation where he bites. You wiggle a bit, realizing that the tingle was coming from the strange sensation of his teeth hitting muscle. 
“N-not done…?” Your own heat felt like it was fading, returning you to your normal state of mind.
“I’m not sure how long this will last, given the amount of time I’ve been putting off the whole ordeal.” He pulls your thighs around him and situates you in his lap. You blush, feeling shy all of a sudden at his unexpected display of affection. “Once it deflates enough to pull you off…” He nibbles at your earlobe, threatening to bite into the soft flesh. “We’ll be here for quite a while darling.”
You hum contemplatively, resting your head on his sweating chest. A long time… you weren’t looking forward to explaining all the missed appointments to your patients.
And you certainly weren’t looking forward to facing Charlie and the others. 
_____________________________________________________________
Two weeks later, Alastor finally let you leave his room for the first time. 
You limp to the door, wondering how you were going to explain the fact that you spent two weeks straight fucking the cum out of your supposed patient. Well, he was still a patient. And you had treated him. Just with a more hands-on method than you originally thought. 
You had cleaned up to the best of your ability in Alastor’s bathroom, where he took you one last time over the sink. Luckily, your shirt covered any wounds he left on your upper body. Unfortunately, given how short your skirt was, there was no way you could hide the deep bite marks from your thighs to your ankles. 
“So… you found out that his ‘illness’ was contagious because you contracted it, then locked yourself in his room essentially to quarantine from the rest of us?” Angel asks speculatively. It was clear he doubted the words coming from your mouth.
“That’s the most kind, pure-hearted thing I’ve ever seen a sinner do!” Charlie on the other hand, instantly bought into your lie. She holds your hands excitedly, a million thoughts racing through her head at what she could do with this information.
“Then what about those marks on your legs? Looks like you got mauled by an animal.” Husk is quick to point out the evidence, but you laugh, covering it up with another excuse you thought up.
“Oh that’s from when I went exploring alone in the swamp. Alastor didn’t tell me there were dangerous animals in there. Now I’ve learned my lesson!”
“Riiiight then why didn’t either of ya respond when we came checkin’ up on you all those times? We were worried, ya know?”
Alastor enters the bar, a grin brightly plastered on his face and clothing as polished as ever. “We were busy!” 
He’s already decided that you wouldn’t be leaving his side after you saw him in such a vulnerable state. That, and the strange alteration the rut left on his hormones has led him to form an… unexpected connection to you. After a few back and forths, you excuse yourself, standing up from the bar stool and heading back upstairs with the excuse of forgetting something in Alastor’s room.
On the way up, you feel the burning of several suspicious stares, as well as a strangely possessive and loving one. Your phone dings.
It’s a message. From Angel.
Just admit ya’ll fucked up there
.
.
.
A/N:  I’m not a big fan of writing “he growled” buuuuut my other options according to Google are “he snarled, barked, yapped, bayed(?)” and I wasn’t about to fucking write about how he bayed at the sight of your pussy. Maybe I should’ve just gone all in on making him a little bitch and only wrote “he whimpered pathetically” but alas the fic is over
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messylustt · 1 year
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Jzhxjsh if can I make another request, I REALLY LOVE TOOOO MUCH YOUR WRITING AND i need jealous like i need oxygen
“ if i didn’t know any better, i’d say you were jealous ” & “ you look really pretty right now ”
only free to me — leon kennedy. ughhhh i need jealous hobie too like bdjskjdks
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hobie’s gaze was locked onto the spider variant talking to you. you and hobie were seated, your gaze looking up at the arrival of someone hobie now easily can say he dislikes. hobie found himself slowly reaching out for you, his leg bent up on the long bench. and by subtly tugging at your suit you were forced to slide towards him, his legs now open around you.
his gaze never shifted from the spider variant who was earning a few too many smiles from you. and it almost felt like a relief when the spider finally got called away. you wave him off, before shifting your gaze to hobie, your smile having fallen. “what was that?”
“what was what?” hobie “innocently” asks, his fingers still not having let up their grip on your suit. you look down at his connected hand. “that.”
he looks down too, a small lazy smile edging his lips, as he rubs the material by your hip between his fingertips. “you look really pretty right now…you know that?”
you give hobie a look. you were used to this. this flirting and smirking attitude. “ha ha.” you mockingly say, turning away to continue eating.
“you think i’m joking?” he raises his brows as you glance at him again. his leg around you seems to be more prominent the closer he shifts towards you.
“you’re always joking.” you remark. hobie shakes his head “don’t believe in comedy.”
“oh, that’s right.” you chuckle, unconvinced, looking back to your food. before you can place a forkful in your mouth, hobie redirects it to his as he leans close by you. you smack his hand away, but it’s too late, your foods gone.
“really? i was looking forward to that.” you mutter, frowning. hobie makes a point to eat it slowly, savouring the taste with small sounds, resulting in you elbowing his stomach.
he slightly doubles over, laughing. and just as you go to scold him, the spider variant from before taps your shoulder. “hey, sorry i didn’t get to ask before — mission report run. but uh, are you free tonight?”
you pause, eyes slightly widening. “oh, uh…yea—“
“nah.” hobie instantly cuts in, looping his arm around your shoulder so that you press more into him. “she’s busy, sorry mate.”
you shift your gaze to hobie eyes narrowing sharply in question. “aren’t you?” he asks you raising his brows pointedly.
“no, I’m sorry, I don’t know what he’s talking about — ” you begin to say to the spider variant but hobie swiftly placed his hand over your mouth, your back now having shifted to his front, his stance now straddling the bench.
“she doesn’t wanna admit it, poor thing, but she’s sick. she’s a lil embarrassed.” hobie states, looking to the spider who is eyeing the interaction with a mixture of a nod and a confused expression. you slightly struggle against his grip, but hobie just rests his chin on your shoulder, you now practically flush against him.
“I’ve told her there’s nothin’ to be embarrassed about, but ya know. she likes to keep up appearances.”
“maybe another time…then.” the spider variant suggests.
“hm.” hobie just hums, silently saying ‘no’ in his head, while he fake smiles at the poor spider until he leaves.
that’s when hobie finally let’s up his grip on your mouth, as you spin to face him. “what the hell was that?”
hobie shrugs. “no, no don’t just shrug at me.” you say pointedly. “you’ve done this before. the last time that guy asked me out. I was not sick then, and i’m not sick now.” you pause, eyes narrowing. “if i didn’t know any better, i’d say you were jealous.”
hobie scoffs. “jealous?”
“then explain that.” you gesture in general to the interaction before.
“he’s a dick.” hobie says. “no he’s not.” you answer easily. “he may be thick headed sometimes, but everyone here knows how nice he is. so, come on, what’s your next excuse.”
hobie’s eyes narrow as you cross your arms. you raise your brows waiting. “if you aren’t gonna say anything, then imma go apologise to him and explain that i’m free — ”
this time hobie cuts you off by tugging you closer and grabbing your chin, his lips smashing against yours. you gasp into his mouth, as you’re tipped back, your back forcing to arch as he holds you against him. his seating position made it easier to control the movements.
your seating position made it hard. hobie used that to his advantage as his hands found your waist, his lips wrapping around your lower and sucking. he then begins to slightly shake his head his lips brushing yours. “but you aren’t free…ya wouldnt wanna lie now would ya?”
you’re shocked, and all that comes out of your mouth is “but i don’t have plans tonight.”
hobie chuckles, licking at your lower lip slowly as he makes sure you stay close. “i don’t mean ‘schedule’ wise, love…” his mouth opens against your own, panting breathes mixing. “i mean you aren’t free to anyone but me…”
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© messylustt.tumblr please don’t steal, copy or translate my work onto other platforms.
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qhoaaaa · 1 month
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SO *claps hands* MILO GREER HUH 💛
I feel like if Erik ever does a flashback of Milo/Sweetheart becoming mates
I just
KENDOWHWOEDN
Think that Milo would be so fucking nervous
"Yeah, I just....see you... as my mate... yeap! And I know we've talked about this before and I just... wanted to say that... uhm... no, wanted to ask if... you'd wanna be my... mate?"
(Insert more lovey dovey shit he is yapping abt how amazing Sweetheart is and has been to him and how they have affected his life)
100% Asher would be more awkward but Milo's nerves are fucking SHOT because he's like holy shiiiiiitt I'm gonna fuckign do this aren't I yes I am
Trying to see if Milo would ask/say it in his apartment or the place where they hunted the Shade down together
Bc he's sentimental
Fucker (I love him)
"My ma is gonna be so fuckin happy"
He's crying your honor
Love a man whose in touch with his emotions
When Sweetheart says yes he's like,
"No shit... WAIT what did you say... yea, that's what I thought... (he's like how the fuck did i get to this point)... w-well what do I do now? I DONT KNOW IVE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE"
Ahem (NSFW 18+ AFTER CUT)
Tagging! @annahxredaxted @moronkyne
He mounts them.
This is shameless smut you've been warned. 😈
They fuck first in the woods (if he asked in the woods) , then later at his apartment bc we all know these two can't keep their hands off each other...
Hands gripping their hips, it just comes natural to him, especially after they said yes to being his mate.
Let's out the most feral and gutteral moan when he presses inside them
And erm,,, 🥺
Bites.
Tons of biting, claims he wants to have his scent all over them and loves to see his teeth prints on their sweet neck and shoulders
If Sweetheart is on their belly, he bites at their nape, as if trying to keep them still (RHSIDBDJEJE PLEASE PELASEE EPWLSLSLEELEJR)
"My mate... my fucking mate! Mmhh, gonna... gonna fuck you nice and deep... just how my mate likes it..."
He legit won't stop touching them, his hands sliding over their sides, nails lightly pressing into them, he presses his cheek to their neck to smell them, to smell their pleasure, to hear their gasps and moans: he's worshipping them
Milo kinda likes to manhandle them, so there's times where he grips their hips up off the bed/surface and it makes them shiver, he flips them over onto their back to touch their chest and belly, and scoots closer between their legs to fuck them senseless
He does that thing where he moves Sweetheart's legs straight up and holds them and fucks between their thighs before slipping into their hole, he also spanks their thighs while he fucks them a bit
Kinda like honeymoon sex except they're not married, they're mates
And the whole time, he's just rambling on thanking them for being in his life, for being his mate, and being super cute and sappy while he's about to cum inside them
HE LAUGHS DURING SEX, BE STILL MY HEART
They fell asleep with his cock still inside them and in the morning when they're both up, Milo gently fucks into them again, holding them tight to his chest and he has the honor to see them cum on him AND to cum in them again
If they're feeling it, Sweetheart asks Milo for the good old 69 and Milo's like....
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"I fucking love youuu"
Milo's on the bottom (they actually push him on the bed and are like "you better fucking stay down and let me please you" and hes like "ooh... hell yeah Sweetheart" (heart eyess)) , Sweetheart is on top and they're fucking deep throating his cock so well he tells them to go slower or else he'll cum too quickly and they're like, ok and?? , he just laughs and then they just plant themselves on his face
Then Milo's got his hands wrapped around their thighs and is NOT letting them go, occasionally he'll have his hand caress up their spine to see them squirm and he'll wrap his hand in their hair, pulling back gently, to see them arch
Even like this he can't resist to spank and grab at their ass, especially if they're fucking SITTING ON HIM (insert that one meme of Doja Cat about big noses)
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When they finally cum, Milo kinda shakes his face against them to get every last drop, his tongue swirling everywhere. This man needs their cum.
And Sweetheart makes him cum when they take his cock as far as it'll go and stay there until that cock is done pumping in their mouth.
They are both cum slutsI MEAN WHATAATTEEJEJDIEJOJ
I'm done yapping goodnight
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ianales · 1 year
Text
High Infidelity (Lo’ak x Omatikaya! Reader)
a/n: my first time writing so im sorry if this is kinda shitty.
after 5 years with the Metkayina clan the sullys finally returned to the forest bringing along tsireya and ao’nung. Reader reunites with lo’ak her promised mate, to find out he already has one.
Warnings: angst, cheater?Lo’ak (sorry yall)
disclaimer: past lo’ak is 19, (cheater! lo’ak is 23)
part 1 ——— part 2 (tbc)
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The horns were blaring indicating that there were someone coming, people rushed to the landing area to see who is was.
“TORUK MACTO AND HIS FAMILY HAS RETURNED” someone yelled. That caught my attention immediately, it’s been five years since the sullys brought the love of my life away, it's been hell but i managed.
According to your friends and family, you two were a match made in heaven, initially it was an arranged marriage, the plan was to fake it for one year. However slowly it turned real, it was the best thing that happened in my life.
When the sullys announced that they were leaving, i was devastated, i spent the last days with lo'ak, i couldn't leave his side.
"i'll come back for you, i promise, me and you against the world yea?" his hazel eyes staring deep into mine never failed to make me feel safe. "me and you against the world." i smiled.
I rushed to the landing zone, abandoning the necklace i was making, it felt like my legs were flying off, when i finally arrived i pushed my way to the front of the crowd, my heart fluttered at the sight of him, "LO'AK! i yelled on the top of my lungs, it only took him one second to look over her, i was as happy as i could get, however his expression wasn't mirrored, but replaced with a expression i can't read.
It was until then i saw someone behind him, a girl, my expression faltered, it's okay maybe she's his friend. my eyes flickered down to her arms, wrapped around his waist, she had beautiful curls, light blue skin, her eyes were these captivating baby blues, she was beautiful.
"(name)!!!" my eyes left lo'ak's and connected with Tuk's. she jumped off of Neytiri's ikran and rushed over to me, i immediately took her in my arms and gave her a big hug, "i missed you Tuk!" closing my eyes, "me too! lo'ak look it's (name)!".
"yeah i know i saw..". i was too focused on hugging Tuk to realize that he was already right in front of me, god he was so different, much more taller, muscular, he smelled different, his braids were longer, filled with new beads but he was still lo'ak, my lo'ak.
i stared into his eyes, my smile appeared again, i was just so happy to see him, i leaned forward and hugged him, my arms wrapped around his neck, he returned the favour and wrapped his around my waist. after a while i let go, staring into his eyes, i leaned in for a kiss but he dodged it, leaning his face to the right allowing my lips to land on his cheek.
i frowned, and let go of him, "whats wrong?" my eyes flickering to the girl i assumed to be his friend, "who's she?", she noticed my attention was on her, she was walking over here, why was she walking over here?, "hi! my name is tsireya! you must be one of lo'ak's friends, he talked a lot about his friends back home, i just can't wait to meet them!". "im sorry? what? friends??" i chuckled, "no, no, no im lo'ak's m-", "best friend! she's my best friend" he dryly chuckled cutting me off. "(name)! tsireya is my uhh my uh..", "lo'ak? are you okay?" tsireya questioned.
"(name) tsireya is my mate.." he finally said. i didn't know how react, i was frozen, tears filled my eyes, the surrounding omatikayans’ chatting with jake and neytiri looking around shocked, there were quiet gasps and murmurs all around. "lo'ak why are they reacting like this?...". Tsireya questioned uncomfortably. before lo'ak had the chance to come up with another lie, i gathered upp all my feelings, and couraged up to say,
"because he is, was my mate”
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heartfullofleeches · 1 year
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JEALOUS FUCKGIRL YAN.. yknow if ya don't mind. Coughcoughilovegirlswhoaremean
She's impossible to read.
One minute she's all over you, next she's disappearing off into the crowd. You can always pick her out sooner than later, watching you like a hawk cozied up with someone side night cared to remember by morning. You've told yourself time and again this is just how she is with everyone. Sometimes the flirty, extroverted type just don't get they can't be that way with everyone before someone catches feelings, but it's that same attention that makes you feel like there's so much more going on between you. Maybe you're just overthinking it. As her closest resemblance to a friend, you know better than anyone she'd be a tough partner to have..
Friends...
"hey..."
Yea, that's what you are.
"Hey!"
Over the music and chattering crowd, it's understandable to mistake the voice as directed at someone else. It's when you look at the glossy eyes of your slightly inebriated floor mate that you realize they were talking to you. Taking your gaze, they crack a toothy smile as they move closer so you're able to hear over the music - eyes watching their every step.
"What's going on with you and Dylan? Saw you two walk in and hanging around town before. She's never been so public with one of her partners."
The punch at the bottom of your cup tastes more bitter than you remembered as you sip from it. "It's nothing like that. Had a rough week so she offered to take me somewhere tonight. We're just friends."
The stranger frowns, but their pity never reaches their eyes. "Shame. Seems like she lucked out this time cause you're kinda cute. What's your name?"
"It's-
"None of your damn business."
The scent of department store cologne and tobacco assaults your senses as her hands fall at your waist. You can feel the weight of her glare over your shoulder as the stranger sheepishly backs away from promity to you and her line of sight. Gripping your waist, she pulls you to her chest - shooting an arm around your neck to keep you pinned in place as she swallows her visible anger with whatever's left in your cup.
"Baby.." She draws with that honeyedly sweet tone only she could channel, resting her head against your cheek with a sigh as she holds you close. "I leave you alone for a second and you run off with a stranger. Never pegged you as the type to break a poor girl's heart, but here we are."
The stranger looks between the two of you as her breath fans your ear through her laughter, confusion and a hint of disappointment clear on their face. "Sorry, Dyl.. Not trying to steal your date or nothing. They said you guys were just friends..."
"We are!" You argue, unsure of your own defense as her lips meet the skin of your neck. "we..are.."
Moving to your collar, her teeth close as her arms tight around you - biting down with no real force behind it, but enough to leave a sting. "All I know is if you're not out of my fucking sight in the next ten seconds we're gonna have a big problem on our hands and depending on how settling it goes there might be a few teeth on the floor."
The stranger opens their mouth-
"10...."
Turning tail as she opens hers. Watching as they flee, you finally wriggle out of Dylan's arms enough to shove her away. "What the hell was that, Dylan."
She shrugs, having the nerve to look upset as you raise your voice. "What? They were getting in your space so I helped you out. You're welcome by the way."
"They were just talking to me- Why bring me to a public place and go talk to somebody else if you didn't want me mingling with others. Why do you always insist we're just friends to people then turn around and act like my girlfriend when people trying to get to know me. Do you want me to end up miserable and alone?"
Something snaps in Dylan's eyes at your accusations. Grabbing a fistful of your shirt she yanks you back towards her - ramming her lips and tongue against your sealed mouth as she clutches your jaw, applying pressure to pry you open for her. The taste of liquor and the tobacco you smelt on her prior spills onto your tongue; the jewelry of her inner piercing clashing against your teeth as she robs you of breath and grasp on whatever grounding your relationship had before this. Her hand dips into your back pocket as her husky eyes into yours - voice dropping to a whisper so the watching crowd hasn't a clue what she says. All that matters is that you do and understand your place.
"What we are doesn't matter right now. Only thing that does is that you are mine. Don't let anyone put any silly ideas in that pretty head that make you think that you're not. Do I make myself clear?"
You swallow the air you had been holding.
"Do. I. make myself clear."
"..yea."
"Good." Her face relaxes into the smile you've grown accustom to as she pats your cheek. "Good. Say I'd hate to have to remind you, but I've been told I'm a bad liar."
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