#hehehehe i enjoyed designing them!!!!

[otaku553]

Friendly fire art fight attack on @fluffyartbl0g with Lilith and Cyril :)))))

[luck-of-the-drawings]

REFLEX IN THE SKY, WARNS YOU YOURE GONNA DIE, STORM COMING, YOU BETTER HIDE. FROM THE ATOMIC TIDE

(messin around with (ONLY) pens and colored pencils, error correction done with paper n glue)

[kimikitti]

Design round ups for the week!

Obi is getting a revamped magical girl phantom fusion form with Riddle's Phantom. I decided it needed to be more Obi so I mixed in more elements of a jester into the design. And of course the guy gets a big hammer to smash things with. I bet he says stuff like "It's time for you to lose your head!" and then bashes you with the hammer. (I likely wont make any finished pieces with the phantom fusion designs it's mainly for fun and for lore)

Obi can fuse with the phantoms depending on their relationships with him. Each one gives certain added abilities. However, these forms are unstable. The longer Obi maintains these fusions the greater risk he is at losing himself in them. (Imagine he's fighting an overblot and his face starts to melt) The phantoms all have different relationships with Obi and have differing perspectives on it.

OOf, I want to draw Obi fighting malleus so bad, switching between fusions to the point where he loses track of them. And starts mutating. (the body horror! the angst!!)

Next up is my very traumatized son Tenjin. He's getting a less goofy hairstyle now. And I'm thinking of making him more of a short king. He's still built like a brick shithouse that can fuck you up. But he might not be as tall as you would expect. (Nothing is set in stone yet, but I do enjoy characters who take up the room without needing to be physically the biggest)

In the interest of keeping my ideas in a place I'm gonna monologue some of Tenjin's lore here.

Early childhood: Tenjin grew up with a parent who was definitely not equipped to take care of a child. Due to his parent's narcissistic tendencies, Tenjin was often neglected and put down. His involvement in gangs led him to find a dangerous but sought after sense of community and safety.

He holds himself in very low esteem and has internalized very rigid power dynamics. Tenjin believes that there are only two kinds of people in the world: those who were meant to lead and those who are meant to follow. He believes himself to be a follower, the muscle for most people.

Tenjin initially did not want to go to NRC. But when his acceptance was discovered by his parent, they flipped out. Tenjin and his parent had a big fight that resulted in his facial scar. (I'm not going to go into too much detail on what went down here) After being practically kicked out and with nowhere else to go, Tenjin begrudgingly goes to NRC.

(hehehehe.... can you imagine how bad this is going to get before it gets better? Let me tell you, its only down hill from here for a bit.)

[lightlycareless]

Hiii 🤍

So I got this idea from one of your one-shots, the one where naoya and y/n are doing it in a mission😭

So they are secretly dating in that right ? And I thought about them in highschool AU secretly dating too🤭 And you know her siblings and friends finding out eventually, like I really wanna see naoya and y/n sneaking outttt and those stuff yk, kinda like a forbidden romance 😭

Have a good day 🤍🤍🤍 byeee!

Hellooooooooooo anon hehehe

Thank you for liking that dirty piece of mine 😏 super indulgent, of course. Glad to have it out of my system. (Edit: it said sister, wtf lol)

So anything highschool au related is like my weakness, specially if I get to write things like secretly dating aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Anyways this is a two part story!!! heheheh Didn't mean to, but after that ending, I just had to. :) I hope you enjoy it!!

warnings: none. au. highschool. Naoya is like maybe super ooc, but he adores you so. 💖 it's only expected. FLUFFFFFFF.

Happy reading!!!

Secretly dating Naoya during high school is naturally filled with clandestine meet ups here and there, made possible by you asking for permission to go the “restroom” in the middle of class, only to head up straight to the designated place of reunion: right around the corner of a distant hallway and beneath the stairs, pulled into a tight embrace as soon as you cross his sight, and subsequentially letting you know how much he missed you and how dreadful it was to be away from you for even one second!

“I missed you too!” you would exclaim, wrapping your arms around his neck and attempting to pull him down for a kiss—you always hated how he forced you to stand on your tip toes, all for his seeming enjoyment. “Lean down a bit, I can't kiss you like this!”

But Naoya would only chuckle, letting you struggle a bit more until he finally obliged, taking your lips into another quick kiss before freeing you once again, to meet up later, that is.

“See you for lunch, princess.”

“… Only if you promise to not be mean…”

Naoya laughs.

Even if the two were meant to keep this a secret from the outside world, that didn't stop you from indulging in the things you always wanted to do with him, such as packing an extra box of lunch for him, obviously handmade by you, meeting up at the rooftop of whatever building was empty to have it together, and if he felt in the mood for such, feed him as well.

“Wait, before we eat, close your eyes.”

You’re no longer taken aback by requests of this nature, if anything, it excited you, so you quickly obeyed soon after. Naoya would then take hold of your hands, gently placing a box on them before asking you to open your eyes—a gasp ensued at the sight of your gift.

“No way! These are—how did you even get them?! I thought they were sold out!”

These were none other than the special edition tiramisu mochi your favorite store made just a few weeks ago. The desire to go and get a few was there, but your responsibilities at school were far more demanding, and so, you’d come to dejectedly accept the reality that you might never have them, not even a taste…

Luckily, Naoya's adoration for you (and determination to make you happy) was far bigger than anything else, literally, and with the possibilities he had… all that he needed to do was make a few phone calls and he’d soon have the happiest girlfriend in the world.

“Nothing's sold out for me” Naoya sappily admits, but to you, who was completely enamored by him at this point, was only the sweetest response yet.

“Oh, Naoya, thank you so much!!” You cry, taking him into a hug and attacking him with kisses all over his face. His cheeks become a flustering mess, and yet, does nothing to remove you. “I can't wait to try them!”

“Just be sure to eat first, though. I don't want you getting all full with mochi and then complaining you’re hungry…” he teases with a smirk.

You pout. “It was just one time!” that you wanted to recall. “But alright…”

Naoya kisses your cheek.

“Don't be upset, princess. If you want more, I'll get you more”

As long as you give him more of those sweet kisses, or more like tiramisu kisses, as they’d become known later on.

These were nothing more than just a few examples of the things you liked to do with Naoya. However, not everything would be completely enjoyable, and just as expected of life, the two were bound to eventually do things neither liked in its entirety—nothing too extreme, just… tedious by itself. Like studying.

Even then, however, Naoya always did his best to help you. Since he was the best student out of the two, he could easily provide you with the help you needed to improve your notes—if not the motivation to do so.

It was silly to think how Naoya at one point once hated doing this with you, or more like was oblivious to your actual intents when asking him for help. Back when the two were just barely staring to know each other, you'd come to him with the pretense of needing guidance with one of the many subjects you were struggling with.

And Naoya, was blunt and blind as he was with these social matters, would only limit himself to answer the follow:

“Why are you asking me? Isn’t your sister bright or something?”

It took a great deal for his friend Ranta to not slap the stubbornness out of him, instead, he managed to explain what you were truly attempting to do with these approaches. You can rest assured knowing Naoya felt like an absolute idiot after discovering this. Thankfully, now that he knows what you mean, he doesn’t let any opportunity pass. In fact, he even offers himself up for the job—even when you profusely refused.

“I don't want to study anymore…!!” You'd dramatically cry, resting your head onto your arms and down on the desk; simply continuing to whine. “I hate this!”

“Come on, princess; just a bit more and you’re done.” Naoya attempts to comfort, removing one of your hair strands covering your face. He enjoyed this silly side of you, thought it unbearably adorable… but he preferred you to be happy. By far.

“No. I don't want to; I don't care if I fail, I'm not doing this anymore! And nothing will convince me otherwise!”

“Are you sure?” He smirks, placing his arm around your waist and leaning closer to you.

“Yes!” You try your best to remain unaffected, even if deep within, you were desperately longing to bask in his touch.

“Not even a kiss?”

“Nope! Not even that!” You refuted his suggestions. “Don’t try to convince me otherwise, it won’t work!”

Well, you’d have to do better than that if you wished to stop Naoya.

“Oh, really? Not even…” Naoya then reaches for his bag to swiftly take out a small Gengar plushie. Coincidentally, the same one you saw at the mall a few days ago: the newest one Pokémon Center had released, and naturally, you’ve been dying to get. “…For this?”

You press you lips together, trying your best to control your impulses and freak out about the gift—but there’s one thing you always forget about Naoya: is that you can’t ignore his enchantments, and soon, you attempt to seize the plushie from his hands, only to once again, fail to acknowledge his impressive speed, a snarky smile on his lips as he imposes distance between the two.

“Nuh, uh, princess. You have to keep studying if you want this.”

“Just—give it to me!” you gasp, trying to reach for his arm once again, but he just keeps straying further and further away from you. In fact, he actually stands up to make it even harder for you!

But that doesn’t stop you, no, not at all, for you respond with the same energy, quick to stand up as well and throw yourself towards him in one last attempt to seize the plushie and claim what is rightfully yours!

If you hadn’t accidentally tripped over, that is, by innocently getting your feet stuck with the legs of a nearby chair and tripping onto Naoya, who instinctively grabs you and begins to worry about your wellbeing, Gengar effectively out of your mind.

Just like you—however, it was more by the fact you were embarrassed to have done such a thing, feeling nothing but stupid by allowing yourself to fall victim to such silly games, as seen in the redness of your face.

“Stop it!” you breathe, trying to free yourself from his arms, hide from his sight. But he holds you in place, fearing you were hurt. “Let me go!”

“Are you ok? Are you hurt?”

“I’m—I’m fine, just—just let me go!” you whine, and it’s a good thing that Naoya knows you so well to the point of understanding you don’t really mean to get away from him, but rather, hide your shame—which he hopes to ease by finally giving you the plushie of your desire.

“Don’t be upset, Y/N. It was just an accident.” He murmurs, kissing the top of your head, you pout.

“This was so humiliating…” you lament. “I feel like a child! Oh, I’m so undeserving of this…”

“Hmmm, if it’s worth anything, today wasn’t that bad. In fact, remember that one time when you ate chocolate ice cream and—"

“Naoya!” you gasp, he laughs.

“Alright, alright!” He cups your face, pressing your cheeks together and making you pout. “I’m just joking; trying to make you feel better, you know?”

“Doesn’t seem like it…” you frown.

“I adore all of you. Even the embarrassing parts.” Naoya leans closer to your face, rubbing his nose against yours. Your heart swoons. “So don’t torture yourself about it.”

“…I adore you too.” You confess, eager to already tell him you loved him, but only when the time was right. When he felt ready.

“Let’s take a break and get something to eat, yeah?”

 “How about ramen? I bought some packets that are supposed to be super good the other day at the market. We can just get some hot water from the cafeteria and done!”

“You know how I feel about that type of food. I’d rather take you out to an actual restaurant.” He raises an eyebrow.

“I would like to but… we need to plan these things with time so we won’t be seen” you dolefully remind him, he sighs.

“Well, nothing beats a date at school.” Naoya then jests, you chuckle.

He then cups your face once again, leaning down to kiss you tenderly.

Saying it’s a nuisance falls short to how you actually felt about this whole ordeal. About having to walk around eggshells just to go out on dates, but until both were ready to let the world known of your relationship, (or prepare for the dramatic response you know your family and friends will have to it) this will have to do.

Unless you two were to lower your guards and let someone else win you to it, hinted by the sound of a shutter coming from the door, followed by a bright flash that made you and Naoya freeze instantly, eyes wide as both slowly turned over to the entrance, loathing all of the implications this moment provided, completely petrified when realizing it was much, much worse than anything you imagined.

For standing by the door frame, stood the culprits behind it all, the last people you wanted to know of your relationship with Naoya: Gojo and Geto—the latter holding the newest bane of your existence, and the former with his mouth agape, eventually letting out a loud shriek that snapped the two out of trance.

“Wait, Satoru, Suguru—It’s not—It’s not what you think!!” You scrambled to control the situation, to no avail, for it was exactly what they thought!

The same information that had them running into the hallways and heading to God knows where, certainly not to keep this secret hidden from the world.

It was only a matter of time before the whole school knew, especially if there was a photo involved! And after that happens, you and Naoya would be forced to give out explanations to everyone that dared ask. If fate found it to be merciful on you, then the only problems you'll have will come through your friends.

If not… then it’d also be a matter of dealing with his and your family as well.

The mere thought of it sends shivers through your spine—mind scurrying to envision all kinds of scenarios possible.

“Do you think they’ll—they’ll take me out from school?” you fretted. Naoya swallows, unsure.

Guess both will have to wait and see what the future has unwittingly prepared for the two—until then, you’d prepare the speech you’ll inevitably give your parents and his in hope of defending your relationship.

…

Or at least, the possibility of remaining in contact with Naoya, if settling for the worst.

I realized that I wrote Naoya doing 1000 things for Y/N. But in my defense, Naoya is the type to give you good things and you're the type to give him good times? If that makes sense. I mean, he has a lot of money, and you're actually allowed to live a normal human life so, complementing each other!!! hahaha

Anyways, what a shocker. Who would've guessed that high school bullies Gojo and Geto were to find out you were dating Naoya first? UGH HAHHAAHHA It was only a matter of time tbh. Though I do fear for their life 💀💀💀💀💀💀

Well, since I love this concept so much be sure that I will write more about it. Or just about HS in general, agjkhasjkgas I love it 😭

Thank you so much for sending in this ask!! Can't wait to write the second part, the.... revelation and everything that will ensue. I wonder if they'll make it out of this alive? Who knows!! hehe.

Take care and hope to see you soon!!!

[beardedjoel]

closer | part twenty one

joel x f!reader. non-apocalypse au.

series masterlist | main masterlist | ao3

chapter summary: it's joel's birthday, and you've got one thing on your mind when you pay him a surprise visit, the first time you've seen each other in weeks. 10.6 k words. chapter warnings: 18+ MDNI, age difference (joel is 42 and reader is 25), soft!dom joel, grinding, unprotected piv, rough sex, dirty talk, praise kink, overstimulation / multiple orgasms, posessive! joel, tinitest of spit kinks (blink and you'll miss it) a/n: thanks for the patience amazing readers, this one feels like it took me ages to get posted, but i'm feeling good about how it turned out! i hope it lives up to what y'all were hoping for joel and reader! heheheh

Birthdays have never been Joel’s favorite, and the older he got, the less he looked forward to waking up another year older. He supposes that most people feel that way as they age, anyways, and tries not to pay it much mind. He wakes up that Friday, his birthday, wishing it was just any other day. But knowing Tommy, he’ll have something up his sleeve for today, and he groans internally and externally as he sits up and climbs out of bed. If this is what being forty three feels like - back aching, stiff knees, living without the girl he loves due to his own colossal stubbornness - he doesn’t want any part of it.

Grumbling to himself as he gets ready, taking a quick shower and running his hands through his wet hair to try and have some semblance of a good appearance, Joel vows to just try to just get through the day. He doesn’t fail to notice the way he’s checked his phone several times while he was getting ready, knowing the reason why is wishful hoping that you’ll text him. The only reason he could find to care about his birthday is if it was you recognizing it, he thinks with a growing twinge of sadness in his chest. Messaging you first seems like too much, like he’s asking for you to wish him a happy birthday, and the thought makes Joel instantly cringe, the long standing pit in his stomach falling deeper.

He’d just try to make it through the day, that was all, that was his motto right now. He found himself saying that more days than not recently, though. How many more days until he just couldn’t make it through the day, until this little motto lost all its meaning?

He sighs, deep in thought as he pulls up to work for the day, expecting the worst. If there’s even one party decoration in sight, Joel swears he just might wring Tommy’s neck. His day goes uneventfully for the most part, much to his surprise. While Tommy chose to spare him on the decorations, he did bring a chocolate sheet cake to their job site for everyone to enjoy, and Joel’s thankful it doesn’t have too much frill to it. Tommy just had to have them write on it, making sure to put his age and everything out there for the world to see - Happy 43rd Birthday Joel! He swears the numbers are bigger than anything else on the cake, and he can picture Tommy requesting that exact thing at whatever bakery counter he’d ordered this from. 

Regardless of his sour mood, the cake tastes so good that Joel finds himself having a second slice, and he claps Tommy on the shoulder, thanking him for going through the trouble at the end of their workday. 

“No problem, brother. Know I love ya. You ready to head out to Murray’s?” Tommy asks, and Joel gives him a curt nod. 

Tommy had agreed to drive Joel to the bar after dropping the cake and Joel’s truck off - that way he could drink as much as he wanted and Tommy had convinced one of their site managers, Don, into being a designated driver for the night to take Joel home afterwards. Don had grumbled on, saying why couldn’t Tommy do it but he knew Tommy Miller was a drinker, and wouldn’t want to miss out on celebrating his brothers’ birthday in the only way he knew how - getting belligerently wasted.

Typically, Joel may have indulged just as much as Tommy on a night like this, especially with how much he was additionally hating his birthday this year compared to other years. If you’d told Joel this time last year he’d end up sitting with a broken, hurting heart on his next birthday, he probably would have scoffed at the idea. Joel just simply wasn’t feeling up for having more than a few beers tonight, ready to call it an early night and forget this day ever happened. 

He was already sick of watching the door religiously, a man with one prayer uttered over and over in his head for you to walk through it any minute, glowing and radiant as always, here to cure everything that ailed him right now. As far-fetched as he knew the idea was, it ate away at the back of his mind throughout the entire few hours he spent there while he tried to not be completely horrible company to be around. At least everyone else seemed to be having a good time for his birthday, he thought with a scornful chuckle to himself, shaking his head a little bit.

When he finally convinces Don to take him home, Joel feels relief as his house comes into view. He wants to just change out of his clothes, put on some TV, and binge eat cake until he falls the fuck asleep in front of the screen and can move on from his birthday. Don seems to sense Joel’s increasingly self deprecating mood, and gives him an encouraging squeeze on the shoulder, wishing him another happy birthday and telling him to get some rest.

Joel is focused now, so close to the safe, warm, comfort of his home and his little plan for the rest of his night that he fails to notice you sitting in the shadows on his porch until your voice squeaks out and nearly has him jumping out of his skin.

“Hey stranger… Happy birthday,” you say, and Joel hears your voice, so sweet and quiet, but can barely register it. You look like you’ve walked straight out a dream of his, even in the dark he can see your pretty eyes framed by your delicate eyelashes fluttering as you blink nervously, the way your dress is hugging in all the right places before it falls just around your knees. He feels like his breath is torn right out of his lungs, and he’s frozen right there, keys halfway in the lock, just looking at you. Your name slips quietly out of his lips as a question, almost unintentionally, and you straighten a little more in your seat at hearing it.

“Wh-what’re you doin’ here?” Joel asks, finally finding his voice.

“Waiting for you,” you say candidly, and Joel just blinks for a moment, looking at you.

“Hope it wasn’t long… I was at the bar.”

“I uh, I know,” you tell him, and Joel’s brow crinkles a little in confusion. “Tommy told me. Actually, he invited me…” Joel interrupts with an irritated scoff at Tommy, muttering “asshole” under his breath to his non-present brother.

“I’m sorry I didn’t go,” you say, giving him a small, lopsided smile. “I didn’t want to interrupt your nice evening with… well, me.”

Joel’s mind is spinning now, taking all of this information in. He’s still reeling from just seeing you after so long, looking just as perfect as always, and now he’s expected to have a conversation with you when he can barely think straight.

When he doesn’t respond for a few moments, shifting in place, you glance to the other wicker chair next to you and motion to it. “Want to sit with me?” you ask, giving him a hopeful smile, your eyes shining and slightly wet. Were you close to crying? Joel felt a pull in his chest at the sight of you like this.

“‘Course, sorry,” Joel replies, shaking his head a little bit to bring himself back. “Jus’ a little surprised to see ya.”

“Sorry, if it’s not a good time, I can go,” you say quickly, sitting impossibly close to the edge of the chair, ready to leave at a moment’s notice if necessary. 

“No, no s’alright. Stay, sit back,” Joel says, waving you off and finally taking a seat next to you. You end up scooting back, getting a little more comfortable as you lean back in the chair and look over at Joel, a mixture of expectation and anxiousness written on your face.

“So… it’s your birthday,” you say with a teasing glint in your eyes, and Joel gives you a playful glare.

“Would seem that way, wouldn’t it,” Joel replies with an amused huff.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come to Murray’s,” you apologize again, “I didn’t want to make it a weird thing, since we haven’t… y’know, seen each other in a while.”

“Oh…” Joel says, musing for a moment. “Yeah, makes sense. But you’re here, now.” Joel feels a smile pull at his lips as he dares to look a little closer at you, seeing the familiar features of yours that he loves so much up closer. It’s been far too long since he got to gaze at you like this, he thinks to himself.

“I am,” you say, returning his smile. “Had to wish you a happy birthday.”

“Could’ve jus’ called,” Joel teases, despite feeling beyond elated that you’d showed up on his porch tonight. “Glad you didn’t, but just hope you didn't go through too much trouble.”

“If I had just called…” you say, dragging your words out, “How could I give you this?” You nudge a box on the little table in between the two chairs you’re sitting on towards him, and it’s the first time Joel even noticed it between it being dark outside and his transfixion on your face. He smiles tentatively as he gathers the box into his hands, pulling it onto his lap and inspecting it. A bright, confetti pattern adorns the wrapping paper with a shining red bow on top. It’s neat, tidy, perfect - exactly the kind of wrapping job he’d expect from you with so much thoughtfulness put into it.

“This is… real nice,” Joel stutters out. “Thank you…”

“Don’t thank me yet, you haven’t even opened it,” you say with a chuckle. You seem nervous - Joel clocks your hands moving around anxiously in your lap, a telltale sign that you’re thinking too much. 

“Either way, even if it’s total crap in here, it looks great,” Joel says with a light laugh, one you return, and he can see your tension easing. Joel lets his fingers tuck under the flaps of the paper as he tears it open, revealing a small, wooden box. He lets his hand run along the outside, a quizzical look on his face as he inspects it.

“Open it already, you’re killing me,” you blurt out playfully, your hand going to your mouth to absentmindedly chew on a nail.

“Alright, alright, hold your horses,” Joel says, his eyes brightening with delight at the situation. He’s still not entirely sure any of this is real, but he savors the moment for another second before opening the wooden box perched on his lap.

Inside is an intricate, gorgeous set of hand tools for woodworking, neatly arranged in the box, all with their own little placeholders. Joel gapes at it, not even realizing how many times his mouth opens and closes, trying to find the words to say. He can make out enough detail on everything in the dim porch light, but he’d bet these will be even more beautiful once he can get a good look at them.

“Don’t even know what to say, darlin’... this is…” Joel trails off, picking up one of the tools and inspecting it. “This is too much.”

“No, it’s not, Joel,” you defend immediately, stiffening in the chair. You’re absolutely ready to go to war with whatever Joel’s thoughts are telling him right now.

“Y-you shouldn’t have done all of this. Don’t deserve a gift like this from you.” He shakes his head slowly, still keeping his eyes on the box in his lap, not wanting to look at you and show all the vulnerability in his eyes. 

“That’s just not true Joel, I wanted to buy this for you, show you how much you still mean to me. Close the box and look at the lid again.” Joel gives you a weary look in response but does as you ask, inspecting the lid closer, and that’s when he spots it.

“See? It has your initials, right there,” you say, reaching over to point it out to him, your hand brushing dangerously close to his, and Joel feels his heart skip slightly in his chest at the proximity.

“I see that…” Joel sighs out, finally meeting your gaze. “This is perfect, sweetheart. Thank you,” he says solemnly, and while you don’t misunderstand Joel’s reaction, you feel a twinge of sadness that he’s having a hard time accepting this gift.

“I just noticed you didn’t have a ton of tools yet when you showed me your woodworking table, and I saw all those little wooden carvings you were doing - animals and stuff, so I thought maybe you’d need this,” you explain anxiously, giving Joel a half smile.

“Yeah, y’are right about that, didn’t have everything I needed yet. Been havin’ a hard time… with the small stuff…” Joel’s voice is coming out quieter than he wants, but he’s overcome with emotion right now. He swipes his hand over his eyes, trying to get his bearings, but you keep a steady gaze on him, observing his passing emotions. Joel feels your hand on his suddenly, fingers soft and delicate as you reach over from your chair to touch him.

“I want you to have this,” you say, and Joel looks up to see your lips curved up softly, eyes gentle and looking like they’re staring right into his very soul. Your fingers wrap around his hand, still closed around the box on his lap, and the warmth from your hand alone is taking him to another place, having wished and pined for your touch for so long now.

“Alright, I believe ya, then. Thank you again, it’s really… somethin’,” Joel says, a little bit of confidence growing in his voice again, and it lifts a small weight off of your chest to hear it.

“You’re welcome, Joel,” you say, giving his fingers a squeeze before starting to pull your hand back towards yourself. Joel’s hand catches it before it even leaves the vicinity of his chair, and holds on again, gripping tightly around your fingers. 

You two sit for what feels like an eternity, just his hand holding yours, both of your eyes full of questioning, possibility, and something… more.

“I have something else… for your birthday,” you manage to say just above a whisper, your voice low and saccharine as you shift forward in your seat, sliding to the edge and standing up. You still haven’t let go of Joel’s hand, using it to guide yourself the few steps over to his seat. You fluidly guide your legs on either side of his hips and slide onto him, settling yourself to straddle his lap. Where your hands join, you guide it to settle on your hip, and Joel follows suit with the other hand, gently touching you as if he’s afraid of breaking you.

Honestly, he was. He was so afraid of that possibility that he stiffened under your weight, panic rising up in his chest. He couldn’t deserve this, he couldn’t be allowed this happiness again.

You read his tensing body immediately, and snake a hand up to ghost along his cheek, brushing gently with the back of your hand. Joel lets out a sigh at the softness of your touch, the repressed longing built up in every cell of his body finding some escape in this one little puff of air exiting his lungs. His eyes flutter closed as you do it again, flipping your hand this time to rake the pads of your fingers down his cheek and through his beard.

“I-” Joel starts, a rasp to the little noise that breaks your heart. When you look into his eyes, you find nothing there but desolation in his warm brown, and you shake your head slightly.

“Shh,” you say soothingly, leaning forward slightly, “I know. I know.” Your head goes into the crook of his neck, your hot breath alone sending a shiver down his spine before you multiply it with a brush of your lips against his warm skin. Fluttering kisses along his neck, taking your time with each one, feeling and hearing Joel sigh deeply each time your lips touch him. When you reach his ear, taking the lobe into your mouth and giving it a gentle suck, Joel seems to melt a little before coming to his senses enough to speak up.

“You shouldn’t be… don’t deserve…” Joel murmurs. You pull back slightly, nuzzling your nose against the side of his cheek, taking the other side of his face into your palm, pressing yourself as close as you can. He catches the scent of your shampoo as your hair falls forward over the back of your head, right into his face. A scent he’d started to forget, nearly panicking the day he’d realized it was happening. A scent that he could have spent a lifetime searching for in drug and beauty store aisles, knowing it could never compare to this moment right here, when it was combined with you. Joel breathes in shakily, his erratic inhales and exhales showing just how close he is to breaking down. 

“I want you, more than just this. I want you, Joel,” you say, your confession laid bare. Joel’s heart thuds so loud he’s worried you can hear it clear as day as you two sit in a tense silence. You hold yourself against him with baited breath, now just left to wait for his response.

“You mean…” Joel starts, afraid to dare the question to leave his tongue for fear of your answer. 

You nod into him. “Yes,” you breathe. “Can we… try again? I’m ready, if you want it still.” You keep your voice low, vibrating right against his ear, and Joel lets another shudder wrack his body. He feels impossibly taut, like his muscles could snap at any moment, like he could fully break. But when he hears your words, he feels an instant release, the breaking of a thread that had been pulling, pulling, pulling, these last few months, slowly choking the life out of him. It was gone now. His chest nearly ached with the sudden lightness, and he fought the urge to clutch at it, not wanting to let go of where he held your hips even for a second.

“If I want it? If I want it…?” Joel echoes in disbelief. His arms slide around to your back, folding you deeper into his embrace and he chokes back a sob. “All I’ve ever wanted… right here,” he says, tugging you even closer, impossibly close, so that you’re nearly melding together into the same person. 

“Joel…” you manage to say, choked up with your own tears now. You could never express just how right everything feels at this moment, being back in Joel’s arms, being so sure of it when you’d been riddled with every worry and anxiety about this exact moment for weeks. You knew that you’d made the right decision, there wasn’t a doubt in your mind.

“I got you, I got you, sweetheart,” Joel says, his hand now gripping the back of your head as you hang your head onto his shoulder, burying into his neck and taking in his scent with a shaky breath, quickly blinking away your tears.

You push back against his hand, bringing yourself to eye level with him and peering into his eyes for what feels like the first time all over again. The emotion swirling there is nearly unreadable - a mixture of joy, care, wonder, and lust, and it’s all being directed at you, nearly taking your breath away. Before you can think, your lips crash into his, hard at first but turning delicate quickly, wanting to really feel this moment and the weight it has for you. Joel returns your passionate, slow kisses, his tongue begging entry into your mouth nearly immediately, and you let him, your tongues dancing together in the most beautiful way as you savor each other. 

Your hips move with a mind of their own, slowly pushing forward onto Joel and back again, starting a steady grind on his lap. Joel groans so loudly you nearly jump, and you find a small moan escaping your lips when you continue going back in for more, more, more from him. 

“Fuck,” he murmurs quietly into your mouth as you brush over the now obvious hard bulge in his jeans with your warm heat. You intensify the way you’re kissing him now, wrapping your fingers tightly around the back of his neck and hooking them deeply into the dark curls lying there, tugging enough to elicit another little noise from Joel, more desperate this time. 

He uses the opportunity to pull back slightly, his heavy breathing mingling with your own.

“Are you su-“ Joel starts, but you cut him off, not even wanting him to finish the question for the fact that he’d be harboring any thoughts that you have doubts about this. 

“I’m sure,” you say with conviction, locking your eyes on his again. His eyes seem to harden with determination then, nearly going a shade darker in the dim lighting of the porch. Joel lips find yours again and he devours you, practically stealing your breath with the ferocity of it. His hands slide to your ass, gripping it tightly and bunching the thin fabric of your dress in his hands before he pushes on you, forcing you forward to grind on him again. You let out a little whimper at his forcefulness, having missed the way his hands so perfectly guide you and show you exactly what you need. How he knows exactly what you need every time may always remain a mystery to you, but you’re not one to question perfection.

You continue your steady movements on top of him, letting Joel push you forward each time, his jeans beginning to rub a perfect rhythm on your aching pussy. It’s nearly too much already, too much Joel after being away from this bliss for too long, and you break off your kiss just to bury your head in his shoulder, mewling quietly next to his ear as you quicken your pace on his lap.

“Yeah, that’s right, baby, fuck…” Joel breathes out, already completely undone by the way you two are moving together as he starts grinding his hips back into you. “So fuckin’ perfect.”

You can feel your heart beating out of your chest, nervous for some reason as you decide you want more, to move things along with him. You think you’ll combust soon if you two keep up only making out like a couple of teenagers. While it feels amazing to be reunited, you feel the need to show Joel just how serious you are about what you’ve told him. 

Your hand shakes a little as you reach between the two of you to grab at Joel’s belt, swiftly undoing it amid many approving sounds from Joel as his lips attach themselves to your neck, kissing along the length of it and up to your face, covering as many spots as he possibly can with an undying eagerness to taste you on his lips.

Joel lets out a hiss when your hand reaches inside of his jeans, your fingers brushing along the soft fabric of his briefs, tracing the hard length of him inside.

“Is this okay?” you quietly rasp, and Joel’s approval stretches from his little smile to his eyes as he nods.

“Gonna make me crazy already, baby, the way you’re touchin’ me,” he says as you continue your movement along his shaft and wrap your hand tighter for a quick moment before sliding your hand inside of his briefs. The warmth of his skin blazes onto your hand as he throbs beneath you with your light strokes. Joel hums pleasantly, his eyes glazing over with need when you dare to peek into them. His head nearly lolls back onto the chair with a little groan when your finger swipes the head of his cock, feeling the wetness of his precum before you swirl it around the tip of his cock with your thumb.

Your entire body feels on fire, warm from the inside out as your core twists deep inside with need, the desire to feel him inside of you reaching a dangerous territory of necessity for you.

“Joel…” you coo as your cunt aches so sweetly for him, more than ready for him to completely own it again. You wrap a hand around his cock, fingers feeling so small around his girth that it makes your mouth water with anticipation for what’s to come.

“I know, baby,” Joel responds as you pull his cock out of his jeans, freeing the length of him and you gasp a little at the remembrance of the full size of him, already finding yourself picturing it being thrusted deep inside of you. Joel smirks at the starry-eyed look on your face as you take him in again and places his hands on your thighs, sliding your dress up higher.

“Missed my big fuckin’ cock, didn’t you?” Joel asks, so cocky and sure of himself that it sends another wave of desire straight to your clit and you can only find yourself nodding. “‘Course you did,” Joel adds on when he sees your speechless, practically drooling response to his question. Joel’s hand has been steadily moving your dress higher until his hands slide right to your ass, playing with the fabric of your panties, tracing his fingers along the lace.

Your hips lurch forward with anticipation, and you bring your lips down to Joel’s again, kissing him with pent up passion as one of his hands comes forward to cup your cunt, finding it desperately soaked for him, and he tuts into the kiss as if he can’t believe what he’s feeling. You push into his hand, your clit eager for any kind of movement on it, and Joel obliges, letting you grind onto his palm through your underwear for a few moments

“Need to see this pretty little thing,” Joel murmurs breathlessly, and you nod feverishly in agreement.

“Just fuckin’ rip them off, Joel,” you tell him, your lips barely leaving his to utter the words, and Joel growls deep in his throat at your eagerness, his fingers wrapping around the side of your panties to tear at them. You hear the splitting of seams as the fabric comes apart with a swift tug from Joel. It makes you feel impossibly feral that his strong hands made such quick work of the fabric that you can't help the moan that escapes you as you feel your panties fall away, completely ruined as Joel pulls them out from between you and tosses them to the ground, his lips never coming apart from yours. 

You lift your hips up, giving Joel the opportunity to slide his cock between your legs, and you moan immediately at the way he feels against your slick folds. He grabs the base of his cock with one hand, and your ass with the other, guiding himself to rub back and forth against you until you’re breathing so erratically that you have to stop kissing Joel for fear you won’t be able to catch your breath. He increases the pace, and every time his plump head presses and brushes against your clit you feel the build up tighten in your core even more until you’re ready to burst, the tension reaching a high as you nearly choke on your words. 

“I’m gonna… Joel… fuck, I’m oh -“

Your hips roll and spasm down onto his cock, and he keeps up the pace, brushing his head quickly over your pulsing clit in rapid motions as you ride out your orgasm. Your head buries into his chest, covering up your moans of his name as you yell it out into his shirt with a hand clutching tightly to the fabric. 

“Good, so good, baby, yeah, just ride it out f’me,” Joel praises, stroking the back of your head, “Come all over this cock, f-fuck…”

You whimper and slump into him a little to catch your breath and come down, but the feeling of his soaked cock still pressing against your folds sets you off all over again, and you need more. 

“Inside me… Joel… fuck….”

“C-can’t wait much longer either,” he says, uncharacteristically shaken, and he vibrates slightly with the effort of holding back, but you roll your hips onto his cock as he slides up your seam again, and then surprises you by pushing himself in, the head of his cock bursting into your entrance. You gasp at the intrusion initially, but sigh with relief at the feeling of him slowly, deliciously filling you up inch by inch, stretching you practically beyond your means until you’re completely full of him. You can’t help the warm feeling that spreads through you that this is what you were meant for, exactly where you’re supposed to be.

“Fuck,” Joel grits out, completely sheathed inside of you, feeling you squeeze him as you shift your hips to adjust to the fullness. “Just want to feel you for a second,” he says. “Missed this so much.”

Joel’s hands go back to gripping your hips tightly, not allowing any movement as he just feels you around his length, but you squirm in his grasp, making his cock push against your walls. You let out a whimpering sound at the feeling, and Joel bites the inside of his lip, barely able to contain himself between the small movements and sounds you’re making as you squirm and leak all over his cock, your arousal dripping down onto his jeans. You grip his shoulders for some leverage to begin moving as much as you can, and one of Joel’s hands frees your hip up to come grab your chin, pulling it tightly between his fingers as he forces you to look at him.

“Please…” you beg quietly, the throbbing, aching mess between your legs taking over any and all thoughts you have.

“You lookin’ for me to make you fuckin’ scream right here on this porch, are ya? Can’t wait until we’re inside?”

You shake your head with panting breaths from the exertion of trying to break out of Joel’s grasp to bounce your hips and feel him moving inside of you.

“Good,” Joel says, a devious smirk on his face, “‘Cause I can’t either.” With his words he pushes his hips up into you, affording him that tiny bit of extra space inside of you and you groan before he pulls his hips back, lifting yours at the same time before repeating the motion, slamming back into you hard and deep.

You cry out loudly, feeling him push against every part inside of you imaginable - have you always felt him this much, or is it just because you’d been deprived from the pure pleasure of Joel that it feels like so much more now? 

You start returning his movements with equal vigor, your bodies ferociously coming together as the chair creaks underneath your bodies with the harsh movement.

“Gonna break this damn chair if we keep it up,” Joel says with a chuckle, lightening his movements only slightly. 

“So what?” you manage to reply through stunted breaths as you slam yourself down onto Joel over and over. 

“Need to fuck you properly anyways, darlin’, c’mere.” Joel’s hands cup underneath your thighs, urging you up off his lap as you help him lift you, wrapping your arms around his neck. You bury your face there, not wanting even a moment to go to waste as your lips find his neck again and suck hard. Joel yelps quietly as he moves you to the banister of his porch, perching you on the edge of it, and you grip even more tightly onto his back, feeling your balance completely off on the thin slab of wood underneath your ass. 

“This is what you call proper?” You laugh, and Joel looks at you with a smirk before diving back in to kiss you, slowly grinding his hips into you now with nearly infuriating movements. You moan at the feel of every inch of him dragging out of you before pushing back in. You clench around him as your body shakes in his grip, unable to control the whimpering that escapes your lips. 

“Y’seem to be enjoying it,” Joel retorts, and you’re too lost in the feeling of his cock to even conjure up a snarky response. “You want it faster though, don’t ya? I know how my angel likes to take my cock,” Joel rasps eagerly, and you groan as you nod your head, begging for more of him. 

When he starts thrusting into you faster and harder, the banister rocks under the weight of it, but you can’t find it in you to care. Even if it all came crashing down and you two fell to the ground with it, you doubt either of you’d stop fucking the other with the way you’re both desperately panting now as Joel’s hips snap into yours repeatedly. 

Your legs slide higher up Joel’s back, your ankles hooking together around him, trusting his arms completely to hold you up from falling off the porch railing. When your hips angle enough for Joel to get deeper, you moan as he presses against the spongy part inside of you that makes you absolutely crazy for him, and he smirks as he sees your eyes flutter with each new brush against the spot. You whine out his name, and Joel tucks in closer and kisses you in response. 

“That good, baby?” he whispers gently, a stark contrast to the way he’s absolutely ravaging your body right now for anyone walking by to see. You’re grateful it’s late enough that it’s unlikely, but even then, you can't be bothered by the thought with the way Joel feels inside of you right now. 

“So good,” you whimper in response, barely able to form words as your core ignites again, twisting in anticipation of another high. “You feel perfect.”

“That’s cause this pussy was made to take me, made to take this cock, baby, fuck…” Joel says, grunting as he thrusts into you. “Can feel you baby, you’re so close, give me another one, sweet girl,” Joel murmurs, pressing as flush to you as he can get. The sudden change gives some stimulation on your clit from the soft, dark curls above his cock, and combined with another brush against your g-spot, you’re losing a grip on reality so quickly you almost can’t keep up. 

“Joel… Joel… harder,” you cry out, desperate for your climax to burst out of you, to claw its way out from the tingling pit now formed right where Joel’s cock is pressing deep inside of you. He obeys, thrusting into at an alarming rate, your legs helping his speed as you press them into him with every inward thrust, matching his rhythm. 

You moan out long and low, the pleasure too much to take as the pressure builds to a point you nearly can’t take it anymore before you’re finally pushed over the edge by Joel biting into your neck. You hadn’t even noticed his head move down to do it, so lost in your own ecstasy, but the sensation of the pain with pleasure is enough to send you careening straight into your orgasm, practically screaming and sobbing with the intensity of it. Your slickness pours out onto Joel’s cock and he grunts and mumbles into your neck at the feeling before you feel the familiar sensation of you squirting, knowing the mess you’re making right now must be catastrophic between that and how hard you’d came. 

Joel seems intent on adding onto it, at the tail end of your climax as your cunt squeezes his cock, he releases with a long, loud grunt, cursing under his breath as he fucks into your cunt a few more times and spills himself into you. Ropes of his cum coat your walls, the warmth filling you nearly sending you over the edge another time in the midst of your oversensitivity. You feel tears rolling down your cheeks from the comedown of such an intense moment with him, feeling so fulfilled and grateful to be his. 

Joel sits for a long moment, his cock buried deep inside of you still, holding everything in that’s threatening to leak out around him. He pulls back from your shoulder and sees the few stray tears and smiles gently before kissing your cheeks, lapping them up in the process. When he does pull out, it’s then that you notice just how much of a depraved, wet, mess you two had made together. Joel can see and feel the mess between your legs and he tuts, half-impressed and half-teasing before helping you off the banister and onto your shaky legs. 

“Fuckin’ messy girl for me, ain’t ya?“ Joel cocks an eyebrow at you. 

You find yourself shying under his gaze, something that hasn’t happened for a long while now, and it feels refreshing in a way, almost like you two really are starting new. Joel wraps his arms around you after tucking himself back in, smoothing your dress down your backside for you. 

“S’okay, just how I like you, my messy little thing,” he coos, pinching your cheek quickly, and you giggle, pressing yourself into his chest, just letting him hold you.

“You comin’ inside?” he asks, and you can hear the hesitation in his voice, like he truly believes you may not want to spend any more time with him, that you’ll regret what you two did any second. 

“Thought you’d never ask,” you tease him, hoping to lighten his seemingly aching heart a bit and Joel smiles brightly in response. 

“Good, ‘cause I’m nowhere near done with you yet,” he replies, meeting your lips for a long, deep kiss. Unbelievably, you feel a swirl of desire crop up in your belly at the sensation, his perfectly plump lips giving in to yours so delicately but so deeply, and you let out a little moan. Joel pulls away, chuckling. “Sounds like neither are you,” he adds on, looking at you expectantly.

“C’mon, let’s go cowboy,” you say, grabbing his hand to walk to the door together.

“Cowboy, huh? That’s new,” Joel comments with a questioning brow.

“Trying something out,” you tell him with a shrug, grinning, and Joel laughs as he unlocks his front door and leads you inside. The second the door shuts behind you, you find Joel on top of you again, his tall frame crowding over you and his hands on your hips, quickly roaming over your back, ass, shoulders, anywhere he can touch as he takes you in, holding you close to him. His head dips down to breathe in your scent again, getting completely lost in it. You shudder under the feeling of his breath near your ear, hot and needy right on the sensitive skin there.

“Sorry, sweetheart, jus’ can’t help myself right now. Fuckin’ missed bein’ able to hold you like this, touch you anytime I want,” Joel confesses, still not letting up the way his hands are moving, landing on your ass to knead the plush globes there.

“Missed it too,” you breathe out, not minding one bit the things he’s apologizing for, finding your body melting into his again.

“How many times you think I can make you come before I’m ready for ya again?” Joel asks next to your ear, one of his hands gliding to the front of your body and slipping under your dress, immediately going right between your legs. You’re still soaked, remnants of your time outside all over you, your pussy feeling fucked out but still managing to respond to his touch. He slides a finger onto your inner thigh, where his cum has been steadily starting to drip down, gathering it onto his fingers and dragging it upwards towards your cunt. He swipes it through your seam, gathering some of your own slickness and then stuffing all of it back inside of your ravaged hole, pushing his fingers as far as they’ll go. 

“Fuck…” you whimper, arching your back. Joel’s frame pushes against you until your back is pressed into the door behind you, completely boxing you in with his body. His fingers start to work circles on your clit while the other hand comes up to palm your breast gently, rubbing it through the fabric.

“So fuckin’ pretty…” Joel murmurs, sliding a strap of your dress down your shoulder, hoping to reveal more of your skin to him. He seems to change his mind halfway through, pulling both of his hands off of you to grip at the bottom of your dress and pull upwards, lifting it off of you, leaving you standing naked before him. You tremble slightly at the feeling of being so exposed with him again, and the air conditioning of his house sending cool air dancing over your now goosebumped skin. 

Joel takes you in, his eyes roaming over your body, temptation screaming in his blown out pupils. You writhe under his gaze slightly, desperate for him to return to touching you again, but he continues to take several long moments of looking at you before gently brushing a finger up your arm. You shiver more violently now, and Joel’s hand grazes inwards, finally landing at your nipple, pinching the taut bud and pulling hard on it. You cry out, back arching against the door as your knees begin to shake a little.

“God, baby, said you were pretty, but this is fuckin’ beautiful. Fuckin’ divine, lookin’ at you like this,” Joel says, shaking his head, entranced by watching his fingers pinch and roll your hard nipples.

“Joel… please,” you whine out, your thighs clamping together desperately, feeling wetness and heat pooling between your legs again.

“Tell me, sweetheart, what d’ya need…?”

“Touch my clit, Joel.”

“All you had to do was use your words.” He grins, obliging you by resuming the circles on your clit, more languidly this time as he keeps his other hand playing mercilessly with your pink buds. It’s no surprise when the familiar swelling of pleasure rapidly builds deep inside of you at Joel’s touch, your breathing labored as you shut your eyes and lean your head back on the door, moaning quietly.

“Eyes on me, baby, need ya to look at me when you come,” Joel says, voice soft and sweet, with his sudden grip on your chin to tilt your head back down anything but. His fingers grab tightly, greedily, at your delicate chin, holding your head in place as your eyes threaten to roll back at the way his fingers are working between your legs, tight, perfect circles being rubbed on your clit. 

“Fuck, Joel, I-I’m coming,” you cry out, followed by several loud, staccato moans that drag out into long whimpers as you buck down onto his hand, body shaking and impossibly taut as you come. Stars invade your vision before it goes fully white, pleasure rocking what feels like every cell in your body. All you’re aware of for those few blissful moments are the way Joel’s fingers move, riding you through the climax, and how his name spills off your lips over and over, begging him for something you’re not even sure of yourself. 

Throughout all of it, you try to keep your eyes locked on Joel’s, but can’t help it when your eyes squeeze shut in the high. When you finally peek them open, Joel looks at you with a satisfied sigh, his tight hold on your chin turning into a softer, gentler stroking leading up to your cheek. He brushes the hair away on your forehead that’s now stuck there with the small sheen of sweat you’d worked up and tucks it behind you ear, his lips turning up into a small smile. 

He kisses you, his lips barely fluttering against yours in a soft meeting of your lips, one that isn’t meant to lead anywhere further. Just soft, loving presses over and over to your lips, and you’re finally coming out of your fucked our haze to be able to return them properly. 

“Lemme take you to bed, hm?” Joel says, pressing his forehead to yours. You nod tiredly, the pleasurable post-orgasm haze taking over your brain.

“Only if you carry me.”

Joel crouches to press his hands underneath your ass, urging you up by the thighs, so you grip his shoulders and let him lift you, wrapping your legs around his thick middle and supporting yourself around his neck. Joel can hardly think straight, with the whole of your bare skin pressed against him, clinging on tightly like he’s the only thing that matters in the entire world right now. He can feel the heat of you through his clothing, wishing with a fuzzy head that there wasn’t anything between the two of you, that he could envelop you in his own heat, that they could mingle endlessly together. He could hardly wait to get you in his bedroom and make that exact desire of his come true. 

When Joel sets you on the edge of his bed, he stands in front of you, unbuttoning his shirt slowly and intently, watching you to see your eyes lighting up as he works at the buttons. You stand up and grasp his hands gently, moving them to the side to take over, unbuttoning his shirt and kissing each new bit of skin that’s revealed on his chest. Joel finally shrugs the plaid shirt off and onto the floor, and you get to work on his jeans, pulling his belt off and through all of the loops in a slow, dragging movement. Joel chuckles a heady laugh at the way you’re so perfectly teasing him right now before you unzip his jeans and pull everything down, leaving him standing just as naked as you are.

“C-can I jus’ hold you like this?” Joel asks tentatively, despite his cock being at full attention once again from the way you’d undressed him. You can’t help but smile when Joel shows this more shy side of himself and you give him a nod, pulling away to crawl onto the bed and lay down. Neither of you have turned on any lights in the room, instead letting the moonlight spill in through the front window and illuminate enough that it casts a low, shimmering light through the room.

Joel slides in right next to you, wrapping his toned arms around you immediately, pulling you flush with his body and you wrap one leg over top of him, one hand placed flat on his chest, rubbing along the dusting of salt and pepper hair there. You both sigh contentedly at the feel of the other’s skin, so warm and soothing after spending all that time apart. The silence is comfortable, despite the both of you knowing there are mountains of things to discuss between the two of you.

Joel clears his throat, a hand rubbing up and down your forearm that rests along his torso. “Not one to ruin a perfect moment like this, but I gotta ask…” he starts, swallowing nervously. “Why’d you decide to come tonight? What… changed your mind?”

You blink a few times, biting the inside of your lip, trying to compile everything you’d been thinking recently for Joel.

“I just… did. I saw you realize that you’d made a mistake, and how much it hurt both of us. I was scared to trust you again, but you never left my side once you realized what you wanted. I’ve never stopped… wanting it, Joel. Wanting you.”

“I never did neither, darlin’. Swear it,” Joel says quietly, nuzzling his mouth onto the top of your head, breathing you in. “Thought I was savin’ you from me. Thought I couldn’t be worth it.”

“You’ve always been worth it, Joel. All the shit that happened, worrying about my parents, people judging us, job offers, any of it. I just want to be happy with you, I promise.”

“I see that now, honey, how fuckin’ selfish I actually was. ‘M so sorry,” he replies, a slight crack to his voice as he keeps it quiet.

“I know you are, you’ve shown me and said it so many times now. Thank you for not giving up,” you tell him sincerely, rubbing absentminded circles on his chest.

Joel huffs, shaking your head on his shoulder a bit. “Should be thankin’ you for that, darlin’, not the other way around. Y’should’ve given up on an old man like me.”

“Never, Joel,” you say. “Even if you are an old man.”

“Hey, now,” Joel scolds you lightly. “Only okay when I say it.”

You both break into a quick laughter, and you shift and tilt your head up, offering your lips to his, and he takes it, leaning his head slightly to meet your lips with his for a chaste kiss.

“Fine. You’re so youthful, don’t even look a day over twenty five, I swear,” you say, a smirk tugging at your lips.

“Okay, now you’re jus’ bein’ mean,” Joel says with a frown.

“Thirty?”

“Mmm, better.” Joel chuckles, and you pull yourself tighter to him, your warm heat nearing dangerously close to his cock. Your hand traces down his chest, fingers gently grazing the base of his length now. 

“Missed this so much. Missed you,” you say quietly, wrapping your fingers around his shaft, feeling him stiffen, his cock hardening from semi-soft to throbbing in just a few moments of you toying with it.

“Y’have no idea…” Joel replies breathlessly, his hips jutting up into your hand slightly as it roams over his length. 

“Wanna just feel you… please…” you whimper, feeling precum already gathering at his tip, swiping it onto your finger and into your mouth, sucking the slightly salty, tangy fluid completely clean before putting your hand back to his cock.

Joel groans out at the entire interaction, his eyes blazing with heat. “God, sweetheart, want to fuckin’ wreck your little pussy, but…” He winces in embarrassment. “My fuckin’ back… from what we did outside. Went a little too hard.” You try to stifle your smile, having just argued over him being an old man, but you reign it in. 

“That’s okay, baby. I can ride you just as hard,” you say with quirked eyebrows. Joel chuckles but splays his palms in the air quickly, as if to say be my guest.

You shift your weight, straddling Joel and placing your already dripping pussy above his cock, notching him at your entrance. You lean down to kiss him and with the same motion, you press your hips down, letting his cock slide inside effortlessly. You’ve been perpetually wet just being in his presence, and from the way you’ve been warmed up over and over tonight, he’s completely sheathed in you before you even know it. 

You groan at the fullness from this angle, and Joel does the same, his eyes fluttering slightly as he shifts underneath you. He winces slightly from his back hurting but relaxes his tensing body as you start to bounce your hips gently, testing the waters. Joel smiles up at you, his features melting into pleasure as you basically start jerking him off with your cunt, letting him lay back and enjoy the sensations.

Shit, you think suddenly. You should tell Joel about Dylan. You don’t know why it crosses your mind right in this perfect moment, when you’re both so incandescently happy to just be together, but the sudden guilt hits you right in the gut. You know you aren’t in the wrong, but you want to be honest with Joel, not have anything between the two of you if you’re going to start over like this.

You slow your movement, pressing your lips together, and Joel looks at you quizzically, noticing the change in your expression.

“This might be the dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever done to say this right now, but I have to tell you something,” you blurt out, and Joel’s eyebrows draw together, his eyes slightly widening in concern.

He rubs your lower back, sensing your hesitation. “Go ahead, sweetheart,” he says softly.

“When… we…w-weren’t talking, I slept with someone. It was just once, it was not even… it wasn’t anything, but I did do it. When I was drunk. And it wasn’t even any g -” you ramble breathlessly, still moving yourself up and down on Joel’s cock. He tightly grasps your hips, pulling you down, hips flush with his, stopping your movements.

“Woah, woah, relax, relax, baby. Okay, it’s okay,” he says.

“It is?” you ask, wide eyed.

“Don’t exactly love it, y’know how I feel about you bein’ mine and only mine, but I can’t say I blame ya. Left you high and dry out there.”

“Right…” you say quietly, still incredulous that Joel isn’t completely freaking out right now from this news.

“Gonna fuckin’ kill whoever it is, but ‘sides that,” Joel chuckles genially, “Don’t feel bad, baby. Jus’ makes me wanna fuck you even fuckin’ harder, make you forget that even happened.” He lets a small growl slip from deep in his throat, clutching onto the plush skin of your hips and ass, his long fingers spreading along both areas and kneading.

You start to grind your hips a little again, lifting slightly up and back down, beginning a steady rhythm on him.

“Oh really? Think you could?” you ask low and teasingly. “Honestly, it wasn’t any good, if that helps.”

“No? Not any good, huh?” Joel grunts a little as he lifts his hips up into you, unable to help himself despite his back aching and screaming at him.

You shake your head, pursing your lips as you continue your slow pace on top of him. “Mm-mm. Didn’t even get me off…” You run a hand down Joel’s chest slowly. “Shame, really, that no other man could ever live up to you.”

“Fuck…” Joel curses under his breath. “Gonna give a man an ego, sayin’ things like that.” Joel pauses, just enjoying the way you’re gyrating on his cock for a few moments. His eyes snap open again and he looks at you with a furrowed brow. “Didn’t get you off at all?”

You shake your head slowly and deliberately as you ride him. 

“Fuck, need to do good to you tonight, then, baby,” he says, his voice slightly strained from the emotions he’s feeling. It’s a mixture of desperation, sadness, and fucking anger at what happened. How anyone could get a chance to be with you, to taste and fuck that sweet pussy of yours and not even give you what you deserved, it made Joel feel the feral side of him clawing it’s way out. His hand reaches up, cupping the side of your face before sliding around to the back of your head and pushing your head down so that it’s close to his mouth, forehead practically resting on his shoulder. He holds your hair tightly in his grip, letting his lips brush against the skin of your ear. 

“Whatever you need to do to me, I’m yours… I want you to fuckin’ come so hard you never come back down, that you can’t never think of another man again ‘sides me. Want your fuckin’ knees shakin’, cunt drippin’, fuckin’ soaked f’me, squeezin my cock so hard, so full you can’t even breathe…” Joel mutters out, sending your entire body shivering and convulsing with the combination of his words and the vibration of his deep rasp right next to your ear. 

You spasm your hips down onto him, pussy clenching at his words and feeling his cock throbbing and pulsing inside of you. “F-fuck…” you whimper, nearly reaching your high from his words alone. You pull your head back slightly with Joel’s permission, his tight grasp on your hair lightening up, and smirk down at him. 

“Y’sure you can do that, old man? With your bad back and everything?” Your lips press together so tightly to repress your laughter that you feel like you’re going to pop. You begin to ride him faster as you speak, feeling all of you bouncing, your tits dancing appealingly right in his face. Joel lifts his head, takes one into his mouth and sucks harder than he ever has, and you gasp loudly, unable to pull away. He lets it go with a small pop and looks up at you, darkness flashing in his eyes. 

“Gonna fuckin’ wish you never said that,” Joel states before he sits up, groaning quickly with the effort and then deciding its well worth it, grasps your back and flips you around, slamming you down into the bed with him. His entire weight is on you, straddling you, the movement from flipping pushing his cock so deep that you squeal out in both pain and pleasure. He ruts into you hard now, lifting both of your legs to his shoulders, putting you in a tight, cramped position where they’re trapped between your body and his now. 

All you can feel is Joel, Joel, Joel - his cock pressing against your spongy part inside again, his sweat intermingling with yours, his ragged breaths as he pounds into you with no mercy. You cry out, tears stinging your eyes from how fucking deep he is, you think he’s hitting your cervix at this point and it’s a sensation you haven’t experienced before, but it’s tearing you up from the inside out how good it feels. You can’t do anything but whimper as Joel asserts himself over you, trying to make the words he whispered in your ear become a reality. 

He leans even closer, the angle completely devastating you as a few tears slip free from where they’ve been brimming in your eyes. “Tell me how good I am to you, hm? Wanna hear you praise this fuckin’ cock,” Joel says, his voice so smooth and controlled for how hard he’s ravaging your body right now.

“So good, Joel, fuck… your c-cock… you’re so good to me.”

“Again,” he commands, turning his head to bite down onto one of your legs that are framing near his face. You whimper loudly, barely able to even think of the words to say, let alone speak them.

“N-never want another c-cock. Can only take y-yours, so good to me, so f-fuckin’ big and full, Joel.” Your face scrunches up slightly, a few more tears rolling down your cheeks as Joel snaps his hips into your over and over, your insides coiling with heat and everything good when he hits the perfect spots inside of you.

“That’s right,” he groans desperately, clearly as affected by your praise as you are his. Nearly effortlessly for his back hurting him, he pulls out of your cunt, leaving it squeezing at nothing. He quickly looks down at your fluttering, fucked out cunt and spits quickly in-between your legs before he turns your body belly down on the bed, your legs shaking as you bring them down and nearly melt into the mattress. You’re shaking, your knees and thighs completely quaking just as Joel had wanted, and you’re thankful for the break. Joel’s hands grasp either of your ass and lift it slightly off the bed, angling himself behind you and slamming right back into your cunt. You nearly scream, the stretch of him all over again nearly too much with how heightened everything feels. 

“‘M I still so good for you, baby?” he asks. You can only nod, and breathe out a quiet, raspy “yes”, your face turned off the mattress to try to look back at him.

“Ready to come, angel? I can feel you, so fuckin’ tight, practically beggin’ for it, ain’t ya?” Joel says, his voice less controlled now, and you can tell he’s just as close as you are. He slides a hand between your body and the mattress, leaning himself closer, changing the angle of himself inside of you and it’s perfect, holy shit it’s perfect.

His finger finds your clit in a second, flicking and rubbing circles frantically as your body writhes and bounces into his thrusts. You moan over and over, his name, expletives, anything you can think of to finally reach your high. The tension low in your belly snaps, and you go off the edge, screaming Joel’s name along the way as your legs shake underneath him and your cunt tightens impossibly taut around him, fluttering and spasming. Joel curses, pushing in as deep as possible while he comes along with you, his vision going white as he grunts your name and claims you with his hot ropes of cum spilling inside of you. He relishes in the feeling, the way you take all of him in a moment like this, moaning louder as soon as you feel that he’s coming along with you. 

You continue to tremble, trying to come down from the way Joel has just turned your world upside down. You should have known - when Joel says something, he means it, and the way you’d just went higher than the god damned heavens just now proves it.

You let out soft, whimpering sounds as you lay there, body completely slack and feeling unable to even lift your head until you regain some composure.

“Shit…” Joel murmurs, concerned, his body wrapping around yours in a second. “Y’okay, baby? You hurt?”

“N-no,” you croak out, trying to give him some semblance of a head shake. “Just… j-ust…”

“So fucked out f’me,” Joel teases, wiggling his eyebrows a bit as he feels the situation lighten. If you had the energy, you’d punch him on the arm, but you just groan in agreement. Joel laughs, nuzzling his nose onto your shoulder. “Just how I fuckin’ like it, means I did you like you deserve, sweetheart.”

“You can say that again… I mean, fuck, Joel.” You giggle a little bit, finally feeling your senses coming back to you as you try to roll over.

“Say the same to you, so perfect f’me tonight, baby. Promise I’ll take it slow next time. Give you all the sweet stuff,” Joel laughs at his own words and you roll your eyes.

“You’d better, I’m gonna barely be able to walk for days, swear to God,” you scoff.

“Jus’ means I get to take care of ya. My poor baby can’t even walk,” Joel clicks his tongue, “Cock jus’ too big f’ya?” he teases, and you let out a disapproving noise, trying to squirm away from him in irritation, but he holds you even tighter. “Jus’ admit it, s’okay honey. Not everyone can take it.” Joel says tauntingly, shrugging nonchalantly to add on to the teasing torture he’s lashing on you.

“You know I can take it, Miller. Fuckin’ better than anyone,” you snip back, trying to turn away from him still, but Joel manages to scoop your body into his, spooning you now, crossing his arms tightly over your chest.

“Damn fuckin’ right,” Joel admits, giving up the charade. He kisses the back of your head, trailing them down to your neck. “My perfect girl.”

“Yours,” you echo back, snuggling your body into his and feeling so at peace you could nearly cry. This is where you were meant to be, right here in Joel’s arms. Always.

taglist: @paleidiot@mumma-moonchild@soph55@chicville03@joelsversion@feliciab1990@fellinfromthetop@gossipgirl-03@sarap-77@blueseastorm@akah565​ @pattwtf @scarlettthefierce

[bun0nthemoon]

Saw your centipede and was immediately obsessed, looked around your blog like a creepy stalker and I just gotta say you have adorable bug designs, they're all really cute and I want to give each of them some sugar-based snack. :)

Heheheh thank you they will surely enjoy it!

[bludmd23]

What's your favorite form/shape/look for Martian Manhunter?

OMG OMG HI You asked me the question I didn’t know I was dying to answer!!!! Thank you and pls enjoy my ramble<333 under the cut in case it gets too long heheheh

So this can be answered from multiple angles (and that’s exactly what I’m gonna do)

First would be my favorite art style for J’onn!!!

No argument here it’s definitely dcau’s design

This skrunkly blorbo has the most perfect face ever, so very well balanced features in between human and alien, my favorite thing about it are those black patterns on his eyes and his lil mouth shape <33

And his natural form in this style is perfect too, love the bio armor looking chest plate thingys on his chest and his heels, gives him a bug vibe and how can I not love that!!!

Other styles I like would be:

J’onn from Justice League Action, a bit skinny but he’s very cute and I love his overall silly vibe

J’onn from Justice league Crisis on two earths

Alright next I’ll talk about my fav uniforms for him!!

Gotta love the classic one ya know, very effective, real fun seeing him walkin around with his tiddies out and in his lil hot pants

N52 J’onns outfit is pretty cool too, I kinda like it when they go in between too little coverage and too much, plus loincloth fits him (idk if that’s what it’s called) , bonus point for claws and spikes on elbows

Justice lords J’onn pretty cool too!!! Kinda wished there was more red tho

In general I like seeing the red X on his chest, the big cape with collar and the boots with a part folded down, so if a design has all three it can’t go too wrong really

Anyways, finally I’ll talk about my fav form/shape for him!!

Apart from his hero form (Martian manhunter), his natural Martian form is my fav, especially when they make it insect like, honestly it’s no fun when you see Martians and they just look like green humans with red eyes, like why!! They’re aliens!! Give them alien features!! Make them look weird!!!

Things I like to see when it comes to his Martian form would be pointy head, long and (comparatively) skinnier limbs, claws, spikes, and I’ve seen some artist give him tree like patterns which is really cool since I associate him with plants a lot, but otherwise smooth or slightly scaly skin does the job too

Here are some interpretations of his Martian form that I enjoy and haven’t been shown, from JLA, adventures in the dcau, JLA act of gods, and Martian Manhunter 1988 (pls go read it excellent story and beautiful art)

That’s it for now! Will gladly yap more if anyones interested, thank you for coming to my ted talk<33

[naoknowswhat]

I made a Clover sketch tonight, look at him I love him (and i also really like how it turned out wth)

and IT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO EXPLAIN HOW MUCH I FUCKING LOVE THIS ITTY BITTY TINY MAN. i would NOT hesitate to die for him in a situation where such methods are needed.

Now before you continue I warn you the following is basically me rambling about how much I fucking love undertale yellow heheheh (Also a lot of spoilers ahead).

I have spent the whole day playing this stupid (fantastic, amazing, marvelous) game, I kid you not that I went from the end of the ruins to the fucking steamworks, which said out loud doesn't sound like a lot of time but uhhh for me it was if you consider that I've investigated EVERY FUCKING INCH OF THE MAP.

I'm not complaining, oh ho ho (merry Xmas) I'm not complaining because its been the most fun I've had playing a game in a WHILE, its made my life better and now im gonna spend the rest of the year (and probably more) obsessed over all the characters and their stories (mostly Clover and Martlet ngl).

But I gotta admit that even if I find the Ut yellow's characters a lot different than the ones from the original game, I can't help but love them the same. Look, I'm no expert on character design but I smile every time I see Martlet comment something or simply being on screen, I start laughing whenever I see a hint of Mo on any frame, heck you mention any of the characters and I immediately start smiling like an idiot, and the whole scene with North Star? The Feisty Five?? CEROBA?? I died, the moment I stepped on the town I fucking died.

I remember being really, REALLY into undertale when I was like 10-11 years old, and suddenly opening yt one day and watching my favourite YouTuber play the demo of this fan game, and i remember thinking "oh wow that game looks really cool!" Simply because of the concept of watching how it was like for any of the other souls to go through the underground, instead of Frisk. AND NOW, YEARS LATER I GET TO PLAY IT BY MYSELF, you don't know how special this game is for me.

For me it isn't only a fan game, or the story of another fallen human, for me it's getting an opportunity to enjoy the main thing that inspired me back the from zero, getting to learn about new characters, about new stories, and new perspectives. For me it's also getting an opportunity to meet them all, to be their "friend" and to live an adventure all by myself because back then i could only sit and watch everyone else do all the things i wanted to do, because back then i could only look at them all having fun, laughing with the good things and crying with the bad memories while separated through a screen.

Today I got to meet them all and to laugh with the unexpected dialogue, while learning that even in a fictional story not everything is painted in bright pink, I saw them get into trouble and also helped them overcome it, and it was amazing.

I also got to die and die and die again and again because I realised at the beginning of the game that I'm really bad at it (i cant blame the controller, I know it :( ), but it also made me promise myself that i would keep going no matter what, because i really wanted to see what's next. Heck you could say I kept going because of my determination ;).

I haven't finished the game yet, but I already know I'm gonna replay it over and over, I wanna catch every detail, investigate and discover every mystery, and i wanna make so many theories already, I CAN'T WAIT TO LOVE THIS GAME.

So for now have a not-so-quick sketch of Clover, the bearer of the yellow soul, the one who has quickly made way into my heart, and it seems the little shit is now living there rent free.

If you've read all the way to the end wth is wrong with you, and also thanks a lot for the attention, I was really excited to talk about this game to someone but didn't know how to do it, so I figured tumblr was the place pla to write for an hour, so the short-drawing post is now my review of the game hehehehe.

Anyway thanks for reading to the very end, I hope you have an amazing rest of the year, and most importantly a great begining of the new one <3.

[ourloveiselectrifying]

Hello, I just wanted to shower you with some love! OLIE is such a good game, from the title screen to the MANY customization options and the many ways the game can play out! I've not found every ending yet but I greatly enjoyed how the little things affect how it all plays out, it makes them all meaningful. ❤️

But above all, I love Kev's design so so much. The fact that they're hairy, the fact that he has cute facial scruff but the best thing? The best thing is his tum, it looks perfect for (careful) grabbies and kisses and maybe some curious nibbling. Perfect to rest your head upon.

He's, hilariously, so friendshaped to me. They obvs don't have our best interests at heart (coughs) but I'm putting on my sunglasses and pretending I don't see all of these red flags if that means that I get to cuddle with them.

Also, all of those kinks of his have me going 🥺🥺🥺 Please, sir, I'll be good or I'll let you be my good boy, I don't care which way. Becky, lemme smash. /thirst

Thank you!!! heheheh💖

His belly is also my favourite thing :3

Kevin is silly goofy friend shaped, just a puppy,, does no wrong whatsoever!!! /silly

[asexual-spongebob]

HIII EVERYONE!!!!

I drew my au designz for Tenn and Skoodge :)

tak made tenn’s disguise heheheh.

for some reason I always thought that tenn would be into 80s fashion so I gave them a perm. I also thought I’d be cute if her sir unit was disguised as a rabbit, and I named it Vir after the physics equation. (I was researching abt physics for school and I looked at that equation and went “holy shit that could be a sir unit name” so that’s where its name came from.)

skoodge also has a sir unit (who I named sir) but I was to lazy to draw him 😭 I decided to give skoodge dirty blonde hair for funnzies. I had fun designing them >:3

I love them writing abt them in wail of the siren, I enjoy writing their friendship :)

[apho-sappho]

HELLO

I'm about to go talk to a friend but need to wait a few more minutes and am bouncing off the walls with internal energy so I am spilling it into your ask box, so sorry about that! :D (also you always seemed to reblog any "you can ask me stuffs" things multiple times so I have decided to take you up on this :))) )

Questions!!! (feel free to answer whichever you want obviously)

is there any little details about Safi and/or Shattered Portals (I think that's what you said it was called right? the Flora, Midna, Shadow, Ravio, and Linkle do stuff au) and/or the mlp lu thingey-magig-y and/or any other thing you're working on that you've not found a way to share yet? They're all very interesting :D

Is there any random head cannon or something else that you mayhaps want to blab about?

Basically this is a slip of paper saying that I've enjoyed all your little rambles and appreciate your existence, ok bye, have a good day! :D

HEHEHEHE I'm so glad you asked

Safi au is being written but unfortunately it's taken a bit of a backburner compared to other AUs I'm writing cough cough four de-aged to cap cough cough

Fun fact, in it, Time spends The Big Bucks to buy all sorts of candies and fruits for fairies who pass by the ranch! Safi immediately takes full advantage of it

Safi also speaks Minish with Four to communicate when they don't want people to understand them

I have 2 pages of Shattered Portals sketched out, but two panels of it properly drawn out. I'll still need to finish the rest and color it, but I'm hoping to upload the first "chapter" so to speak somewhat soon . Hopefully . If I'm lucky

I'm considering writing a lil oneshot for Shattered Portals but idk when I'd do so

I have 6 ponies drawn for my itty bitty mlploz thing, Time, Malon, Legend, Ravio, and Marin in both Legend and Warriors times. I have it all *written down*, but no designs

Some things I haven't talked about yet:

I have a happy ending sequel being written for my revalink fic!!!! It's at 2k words so far. In it, every member of the chain gets little Purah Phones

I also have a fic where Four gets teleported to Wild's world after the events of totk! 2.6k words so far! Both Blue and Vio have been taking anger management classes and Vio is trying So Hard not to snap at the rest for spending all their rupees

I have an au being written abt the Champions coming back to life post totk and having avatars like the sages too. It involves Wild shutting them off and forgetting after he joins the chain and then remembering during a fight and turning them on, only for them to kill all the enemies and immediately yell at him. This one has a grand total of 227 words so far 😭

As for hcs, I might have to reblog and add some later :D They're not coming to mind rn

[llumimoon]

If you don’t mind, I would love to hear about the Snow White DnDads AU.

Also, I just want to say, I love your art, it’s so cute and bubbly; and I love the DnDads AUs you (and others) make. I’m so normal about the Perfectly Regular AU

(Also I don’t know what EAH is, could you give me a brief explanation?)

hehehehe omg thank you so much !!! :D that makes me really happy to hear <3333

I actually finished up the EAH AU designs for the teens so I'll probs be posting that later today w/ a brief explanation of the AU plot but I absolutely will tell it for you too 😤👍

EAH is Ever After High! Its a twin franchise to Monster High based of the kids of fairytale characters. It's primarily a doll line BUT it had a show that was (imo) phenomenal. Like the writers really went off with it !!! Unfortunately it got canceled some years back but I still get brainrot about it every year or so.

the whole AU came from me pointing out the parallels between the two EAH main characters, Raven and Apple, and comparing them to Scary and Normal LMAO. LIKE . Raven is a sorceress who grew up with her mother trying to guide her into evil and so she grew up not being able to enjoy soft and good things that she liked and then later she decides to rebel against the social narrative that said she had to be the villain and reclaimed her magic powers that she got from her mom for something good instead ....... and then Apple being a paragon for toxic positivity with no trustworthy adult figures in her life and constantly trying to conform to get her mom's approval.... Her with control issues trying to do what she thinks is right and good (but isnt always whats best).....

Anyways it totally spiraled and got away from us very quickly as we started filling out the rest of the plot and the cast. It went pretty off course from the original show aside from the Apple accidentally releases the original Evil Queen from her mirror prison plotline (aka Normal accidentally freeing Willy) and its just a LOT OF GOOD FUN.

Hermie also ended up playing a bigger role than the initial show and got upgraded to main character status lmao. And swiftli get to have a cute and silly romcom B plot while marloakworthy go through The Horrors.

The kiddads are all also involved !!!! The things that happen in the teens generation of the Snow White story are lowkey a consequence of what happened in the previous generation of Sparrow's Snow White story. WHICH WAS INFLUENCED BY HENRY'S. We really tied in the generational aspect this time round.

[deadendfriends-clangen]

I absolutely love these designs and the kooky stinky (/very affectionate) art style its WONDERFUL. Dogteeth looks like an actual dog w his head shape and his flopped ear and the way his claws dont seem to retract (?), n Carrionstar looks like a vulture w her markings n coloration…. just wanted to say that i admire how detailed you can make it even w how simplistic it looks <3

HEHEHEHE OMG yesss theyre stinky so smelly im glad you get it :3c THANK YOU IM GLAD YOU LIKE MY DRAWING STYLE i iiiii yes i usually like to draw more simple designs or whatever but try to make them expressive etc idk i just draw like this (real) IM GLAD YOU ENJOY IT !!!!!! YAYYY ❤️❤️❤️

ALSO WOOYES i based Carrionstar's markings and what not on vultures slightly : ) AND .

Dogteeth is actually a dog! It's true. Yep hi everyone she's a dog!! it's true. stinky. i WILL elaborate WHY shes here but the fact she's a dog is not a spoiler. dogy. heheh so happy u noticed how her claws dont retract.. and her bigass mouth

thank you so much for the comments < 3

[m34gs]

For the ship ask meme: Azul/Jade/Floyd (Twisted Wonderland) and Chainshipping (Saw Franchise).

Thank you for your ask, friend!!! Happy to answer :) (based on this post)

Azul/Jade/Floyd - ship it!!!!

What made you ship it? The way the three of them are together so much, the way they dress to look like a *set*, the way Jade and Floyd comfort Azul in Book 3 post-overblot...there's so many reasons. Also, the fact Floyd and Jade enjoy octopus dishes and Azul is an octopus mer. Hehehehe.

What are your favorite things about the ship? The totally unhealthy level of codependency. I absolutely thrive off reading it. It's downright addictive. And I love how their personalities mesh and play off of one another. The banter is fun, and there are so many things that could be twisted into innuendos...it's highly entertaining. And I love the mafia-like theme for their designs.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? I don't think so? I think the ship itself can be considered by some to be an unpopular thing, depending how it's written, but I just like it. I tend to ignore the opinions that don't mesh with mine for this one because I'm just much happier that way.

Chainshipping (Lawrence x Adam) - Definitely ship it!

What made you ship it? Fellas...is it gay to bond so hard while being trapped in a bathroom over the course of a few hours that when you have to cut off your own leg to escape the room, the guy you're trapped with screams harder than you do, and then you shoot him in the shoulder, and when he's on the floor and you're on the floor and you're both bleeding out, you promise to come back for him and say "I wouldn't lie to you" and crawl your way to freedom as he screams for you, only for your return to be far too late when you mournfully stare at his (alleged) rotting corpse in the corner while you sentence another man you despise to die down there?

What are your favorite things about the ship? Adam's sass combined with Lawrence slowly becoming less uptight during the hours they are trapped together. The imagery of "I don't give a crap if you covered yourself in peanut butter and had a fifteen-hooker gangbang" and the thought that that came so quickly to Adam's mind that I bet he actually was imagining Lawrence doing something like that and why would he be thinking that if he wasn't attracted to him...the way in which LAWRENCE'S BLOODY HAND RESTED ON ADAM AND HOW HE IS BLEEDING OUT BUT HE DOESN'T RUSH FOR THE DOOR ONCE HE'S FREE AND INSTEAD CRAWLS TO ADAM TO FUCKING COMFORT HIM AND TELL HIM HE WILL COME BACK FOR HIM AND SAYS "I wouldn't lie to you" HELLO. THEY ARE IN FUCKING LOVE YOUR HONOUR. GODDAMN. GIVE ME.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? I don't really think so. I'm pretty versatile in accepting headcanons and opinions for this ship. Every fic is different, and I don't mind reading all the different views. Adam's trans? Absolutely. Adam's not trans? ok. Lawrence has a thing for Adam in cosplay? You got it. Top Adam? Yup. Top Lawrence? Yes. Both Switches? Sounds good to me. Lawrence divorces his wife to marry Adam? Of course he does. Etc. The only thing I won't accept is when people make Lawrence super thin. Man has a bit of chub and that's a fact. :)

[springtrappd]

@limbsandheads this entire blog has actually been an elaborate operation to convert as many people to vannyism as possible via the "shite posts" of the youth. Glad to see it's working

jokes aside: HEHEHEHE THANK YOU... yeah a big part of getting comfy in my niche here has been getting comfortable enough to actually, like, POST my anaylsis /because/ of the complete lack of it elsewhere. being counterculture can be a tough place to be in! the amount of times i've had to hold myself back or scrap something bc i'm unsure if i'm gonna get dragged into explaining, idk, what a fucking metaphor is or some shit... ugh. awful do not recommend. i'm not sure what's worse: people who refuse to believe that parallels exist, or people that understand that parallels exist but only as fodder for theories (which are, as we all know, the most important part of any satisfying story)

i think people in general have a hostile response to any kind of serious analysis precisely because it's serious; it feels like... there's this pervasive sense -- particularly when you talk to the people that i'm thinking of here -- that academia is somehow Other or (views itself as) Superior in some way, thus making the act of engaging in it about posturing rather than, well. study. people have a very strict idea of what art is, even if only subconsciously, and react accordingly when the Other comes in to try and take away their favourite toy. games are fun; analysis is not. why can't you just let people enjoy things, you're just doing this for attention, etc etc etc. it's a position borne of ignorance, one that assumes that you can separate art from play at all -- and one that finds itself most vulnerable to exploitation. it's fundamentally reactionary rhetoric, is what i'm getting at here, and why i can so easily swap out stupid fnaf jargon for a conservative strawman and still get the point across.

anti-intellectualism sucks because it sucks all the joy out of art. like, for all i joke about being fuelled by spite, you'll find that even my most virulent snark comes from a place of love. i talk about this shit because i love it; because i love the actors and writers and art directors and character designers and production teams and editors, every single one of them, and there's nothing quite as intimate as a dissection. to peel back the layers of a piece of art is to ultimately shine a light on the things beneath -- all the blood and bone and gristle, where the artist has been pressed between the pages... to look at someone and know them, to sit and think about what they wanted to say -- what is that, if not love?

you aren't born knowing how to say "i love you". it's something you've gotta learn. and this is what we in the biz call a """METAPHOR""",

also, while we're here: fun fact! i actually write a lot of my stuff off-the-cuff, which is why the flow is often weird/words are missing/it might take a wild left turn away from the original subject? (like i'm low-key doing rn!) it's something that makes me cringe, but also fuels my desire to get around to writing a proper essay abt this terrible franchise eventually... i've got pages of bullet points & notes scattered around the place (& hundreds of discord messages to pull from, oh god), it's just the practical part of it that makes me want to crawl back into my skin. until then you are stuck with the Crazed Ravings (Autism Flavour), (un)fortunately (depending on how you look at it)

[perexcri]

to hell and back again now exists as a physical object!

(cat for size comparison )

hello hello!! i’m here for an official post to brag about @chubsonthemoon, a dear and lovely friend/hamster/beautiful fic writer and binder/Sandman zine contributor(!!!) who recently bound To Hell and Back Again as a present 💜

chubs is a dear irl friend and is (as i said in my final a/n for thaba) quite literally the only reason i ever started reading or writing fic in the first place. we’ve become good friends over the past couple of years, and i’ve loved being able to embrace these aspects of fandom that i never allowed myself to when i was younger (for many reasons, but that’s another story), and it’s really all thanks to them.

so without further ado, here are some pics of their lovely work!! they’re going to be making their own post about it later, so i’ll be reblogging that here and linking to it in this post as well, because they’ll have far more cool details to explain about the actual binding process than i could never articulate (they literally sent me a full video explaining so many things and i responded with something to the effect of “and the way you did that binding thing - i think you said it was German??” and “wOAh tHE edgEs”, so).

so, first of all: the covers!! @byierficrecs​ was very kind to make such a lovely graphic for this fic, and he was especially kind to let chubs use it for the actual cover!! i know most people in the fandom seem to already know about Angel and the lovely work he does, but if you haven’t checked out his work, please go give it some love~ (the original thaba graphic can be found here!!)

the spine, with chubs’ lovely little maker’s mark :D

(and if i rearranged my bookshelf just so i could put it between all of my R. F. Kuang books then that is my business alone)

and tHE EDGES?? i kind of blacked out after i opened the package today so i didn’t notice until about 10 minutes afterwards that they had continued the vines from the graphic onto the edges?? chubs i know i already screamed at you in private but now i get to do it on a public platform so please know i am still freaking out about this

art!! look at the lovely art!! thanks again to @starsarefire824​ and @itssstarry​ for your lovely work!! i love getting to stare at these pieces regardless, but now i get to hold them in an actual physical form and stare at them heheheh. posts to show them support and/or links to find their work can be found here (for @starsarefire824​) and here (for @itssstarry​)!!

and finally, here’s it opened to my favorite chapter!! just if anybody wants to see the typsetting :D

thanks again to everybody who contributed to this!! like, yeah, i wrote it, but @chubsonthemoon​ bound it, and @byierficrecs​ designed the cover, and @starsarefire824​ and @itssstarry​ contributed art? idk my brain’s being broken tonight over the fact that people can live in completely different places and all contribute to this thing that now takes up physical space on my bookshelf. i can’t really use my words right now, so here’s a poorly-made meme to express my thoughts instead:

and especially thanks to you, chubs!! again, you are a wonderful friend, and i’m glad we got to meet each other 💜 bonding over Chris Fleming videos and our shared connections (i’m thinking of cats and giraffes, ofc) has led to some wonderful memories. Louie says hello, btw!! she was sniffing your handiwork very intently heheheh :] 💜💜💜

anyways, i hope you guys enjoy the pics!! please send your love to all the wonderful people who made this possible~

(also!! i would encourage you guys to read chubs’ fanbinding commissions statement, just in case you have any questions, or reach out to them if you want to scream about their amazing work or have questions~)

chubs’ post can be found here!!