#he's not wrong he is in fact bored
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sharpsuite · 4 months ago
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Tik tok. Chishiya's feline like gaze watches the orange glow on the back of the blinds as the sun sets. SOON THE GAMES WILL START. He doesn't need to play, but he will. Maybe there will be something more interesting this time than the last time he played.
Chishiya slides his gaze towards the man in front of him; SOMETHING about him is intriguing though he can't pinpoint exactly why. Yet. He's intriguing enough that the elusive diamonds player decides to keep company before the night games start tonight. CURIOSITY HAS NEVER KILLED THIS CAT. And in a life where Chishiya's constantly bored, he likes to pursue the few things that have his interest until they lose it.
For someone in a place where death is always near, Chishiya doesn't look the slightest bit bothered. His hands rest in his hoodie pockets and he lifts his eyebrows slightly. " NOSTALGIA makes people see things in rose-tinted glasses. " He remarks - not insulting, merely observational. His lips curve upwards. " Besides, I was never big on watching television or video games. I mostly read textbooks and studied. "
He leans back a bit further in his chair and spares a brief glance to the clock. " I think Carpe Noctem might be a better phrase here. The days aren't as big of a deal - but when the GAMES start is when the interesting things begin. " Which is an INTERESTING way to put death games that left most people shivering in fear or chasing down ways to ignore the impending games if they had to play. " I hope they'll be more interesting this time. The last one I played was boring. " Nevermind that he'd been the SOLE SURVIVOR.
@sharpsuite asked: ❛  this day feels like it’s never gonna end.  ❜ 𝑹𝑨𝑵𝑫𝑶𝑴 𝑫𝑰𝑨𝑳𝑶𝑮𝑼𝑬 𝑺𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑵𝑪𝑬 𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑺 𝑷𝑻. 𝑰 (accepting)
Sam sits deep enough so that the back of his chair slants. The hour encroaches slowly towards night, and though the blinds are drawn, he can well imagine that the sun has started to slither down past the concrete city and behind the dead, empty streets. 
This man with his long, bleached hair and too-cool-for-school look— Sam actually wishes, really, that the power worked. He’d charge his phone. He’d catch something on TCM. Turn on the radio. 
“You should’ve seen it back when. You guys- sure, you have your computers and your smartphones—power to you—but the golden days? I’m talking wallball, 25-cent comics, and this little thing I like to call” —he holds up his hands. He waits for it— “soul-searching.” 
Clever. Sam keeps his elbows on the desk. A battery-powered clock still ticks, counting down the seconds. All of this to say—
“Two words.” Sam smiles. “Carpe diem.”
Life is what you make it and seize the day. Or as much as a death-trap city will let you.
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thelockedtombsexywoman · 2 years ago
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swan2swan · 5 months ago
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Thire: "You should probably go ahead and save yourself, General Yoda. We're expendable bodies made only to fight, after all."
Yoda:
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brittlebutch · 9 months ago
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actually it's kind of funny how people will say Alex's fatal flaw is that he 'doesn't ask for help' and that it's his determination to handle things on his own that leads to his deterioration and eventual death when his whole introduction to the present-day timeline was a very literal cry for help that simply went ignored
#N posts stuff#like even if you think alex was lying throughout the entirety of season 2 and he was waiting from the Moment jay showed up#JUST to kill him (Which again i don't think makes much sense when he could have killed Tim & Jay immediately instead of#breaking Tim's leg. anyway) EVEN IF alex spent that whole time lying it doesn't actually change the fact that he would have at least#been Pretending to Ask For Help and if he wasn't lying then he was Literally Asking For Help and it doesn't Actually matter#what intention Alex had because the text is Ambiguous about Alex's honesty during season two; what isn't ambiguous is the way#other characters (specifically Jay) respond to him; like yeah - S2 Brian/Tim were never in one million years going to help Alex with shit#so sort of any argument that brings up Tim as someone who asks for/offers help is borderline meaningless in this era of the series#Jay had the 'opportunity' to help Alex (and i'll get back to that in a sec) but DIDN'T - Jay wasn't Interested in actually offering Alex#'help' bc Jay is ultimately curious about Answers and 'Offering Help' and 'Getting Answers' are two Wildly conflicting goals#Jay thinks Alex has answers and when Alex doesn't Offer these 'Answers' to Jay on a silver platter Jay gets pissed off and paranoid#and starts Stalking Alex bc he thinks it's 'Suspicious' that Alex won't give him the Answers (that Alex probably doesn't Actually have)#ANYWAY. ultimately this post is about how it's absurd when people argue#that individual character choices could have made a difference in the way this series played out - specifically wrt Alex#because EVERYONE in this WHOLE series are being affected by influences outside of their control ; including Brian Tim and Jay#so it's silly when people are like 'if ALEX had just made a different choice For Himself this could have all been avoided' WRONG.#bc Ultimately there's not really a way to 'help' someone else out of this situation - Tim tried and failed Repeatedly#the comics proved he even failed with Jessica - like MH isn't a horror situation where you can kill the big bad#'getting help' is a meaningless argument - what would successfully helping or getting help even look like? anyway.#the sub argument of this post is that Alex's biggest 'sin' is that he doesn't perform emotions the way other people want him to#like Alex is a character with a kind of flat affect - instead of LOOKING scared or grieved he LOOKS bored or angry#and everyone judges him based on that - so Alex is 'Suspicious' he's 'Lying' he's 'Guilty' but all of these deductions are predicated#on the belief that Alex isn't reacting to his circumstances the way a 'Normal' person would - so it MUST all be an act and so he's guilty#so everyone treats him like he's guilty until the end of season two when he's like 'Fuck it FINE i'll be guilty then' and so it goes#not a self-fulfilled prophecy but being Cornered Into a prophecy and then Blamed for it - SAD. anyway
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inkats · 2 months ago
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having a crush is like poison status effect whenever u have to think.
#my ocs#hello yes see i draw#I hate this so much ???????#what the fuck ??????#do u know how much effort I have to put in to not think about it. Like. Should I just kill myself at this point tbh.#and there’s people around me who are purposely trying to get a crush for like. Fun. Why.#this is psychological warfare.#though I guess their goals w crush is have one and never speak to him huh 💭 they just want a guy to think about when bored.#This happened to me by accident 💭 and I am. speaking to him often. I didn’t today though. hashtag winning 💪 (?)#I will get over it. I will speak to no one over midterms week and I will get so over him.#and then I will be so normal platonic about it.#this was supposed to happen in highschool I think I was supposed to get comfortable w this way earlier in life.#I don’t know I don’t care I just need to survive this at this point Jesus Christ.#and hey guess what I was just about to start gushing in this tag it snuck up on me wtf.#I do not want him. (<- affirmations)#I can never let anyone have my Tumblr or my art socials ever god imagine. Anyone seeing this.#it would suck so bad. Guys. I would have to kms.#why did I meet the most attractive and nicest and coolest guy immediately. why is this my first friend in 5 years.#sorry that is gushing huh. god this sucks so bad. I hate. having emotions.#well it’s not gushing it’s like objective fact people will not stop saying he’s won the genetic lottery to his face.#And I get crazy 2nd hand embarrassment every time but also not wrong.#they’re not wrong. ugh. killing myself.#guys why does every tag ramble end this way. guys. why. why am I becoming a real boy I want to be a puppet again actually.#ok. normal time 4 minutes left in movie clean bathroom then sneepy time and I will do so good not thinking about him and will sleep immedia
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renthewerecatboi · 1 year ago
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not beating the favouritism accusations with this one boys😔
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roobylavender · 10 months ago
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considering what you have spoken about regarding selina do you also get frustrated with like…i cant quite explain it but sometimes especially in more recent years shes been posed or positioned like some sort of damsel that needs a big strong man to save her and like im not saying she should be portrayed with the “hollywood level feminism” for lack of a better term im just think about how old versions of selina would have hated that. like im just thinking of anytime in the reeves movie where bruce grabs her or forces her mouth shut or even when he didnt allow her to kill falcone and im just thinking she should claw the fuck out of him for that. i just miss a version of selina who wouldnt allow anyone to walk all over her personal autonomy like that
oh absolutely! in fact this is specifically why i can't stand loeb's take on her character lol (and as we both know that was a significant point of reference for the reeves film). it's really jarring to transition from her volume one and two canon to the long halloween / dark victory / when in rome. i think a lot of people tend to latch onto these books because tim sale's art is to die for and it's obv hard not to enjoy a good murder mystery. in that aspect they're still books i can enjoy in isolation. but i find it very difficult to enjoy them as a selina fan specifically because in every single one it's like she's looking for solace and security in a man and i'm not sure why. like what was so bad about her original backstory of having a deadbeat dad (whether you ascribe to the volume one or volume two version of him) and why did she need to go looking for her "real" father in carmine falcone. why did she need to seek out temporary boytoy relief in italy. why did she dream about being saved by bruce. none of it really has a reason other than to create a "lack" in her for the sake of it being there, because she'd never needed a man like that before in her post-crisis narrative. as you mentioned it was quite to the contrary and she was fiercely independent and protective of her own peace, esp from men. when she felt empty or without a connection or lifeline to someone real, it was mostly about people like maggie or holly or arizona. her people
what i think it ultimately comes down to are two things: the first thing is the diminishment of her post-crisis origins. after all, it's convenient to ignore how distrustful selina is of people, and of men with power at their leisure to abuse specifically, when her post-crisis origins are no longer relevant to her personal characterization. although selina's status as a sex worker is more prominent now, it was more or less completely swept under the rug for the bulk of volume two. loeb also refused to engage with it in any capacity. it only really resurfaced with the conclusion to volume two because it drew direct parallels to how we initially found her in volume one, and then brubaker expanded on it once again in his take on the character, which was notably juxtaposed against a pre-existing romance with bruce and brings me to the second thing. i've already waxed about this at length so this may very well be recap but i really don't think selina's lack of control over her personal autonomy can be divorced of the modern portrayal of the romance. when selina looking for security and understanding and comfort in bruce is what drives the romance forward there's not much room to maintain her original values and guarded demeanor, if not her outright defensiveness and hostility. a lot of people look at the extensive trauma selina has experienced and argue that she deserves to be in a relationship with someone who allows her to let those walls down. this isn't incorrect in theory. but it does repeatedly ignore who she is. it's kind of like the point i was making about bruce yesterday. exploring the inherently abusive nature of robin or of bruce's right to his children in light of that fact is interesting to do, but the actual execution has rarely managed to take into account who bruce actually is
for however nice it might be for selina to let her walls down romantically and look for solace in bruce—and i say this mostly for the sake of argument, personally i would argue against its necessity—it's realistically not something she's actually going to do. at least not as willfully as she's been portrayed to. realistically she's going to make it extremely hard, which if anything is precisely the appeal. i love it when selina gives bruce a hard time. i love that it's not supposed to be easy or maybe even a possibility for him to win her over bc there's so much about his own ideological stances that's flawed and in opposition to her own. she doesn't have to be any less unrelenting in her principles and worldview for that romance between them to be compelling bc at the end of the day the entire crux of it is that against all odds bruce cares. for however wrong he thinks she might be in a given moment or in her stance against the government, he knows who she is and how hard she's fought and what she's survived and it makes him sympathetic to her because she's real. she's a wonderful character through which to explore the logical limits of bruce's self-righteousness and categorization of crime, as well as a wonderful mirror to hold up to his face as he starts to ask himself whether what he's doing is really the only means of keeping the city safe. and the novelty of it all is that you don't have to sacrifice her character for any of that to be true. writers have simply deluded themselves into believing that they have to and that's why we are where we are today
#you're so real about the reeves movie btw i think she should have kicked him off of a building personally#outbox#also not something i mentioned above but i think a looooot of people cling to bronze age selina#because it was purportedly her first 'positive' portrayal. personally i would argue against that though#i think her golden age iteration was plenty 'positive' and there was an inherent understanding that although she loved supervillainy#she wasn't necessarily evil in a way comparable to other rogues. she always had an inclination towards mercy and bruce Noticed that#which is what made their relationship really interesting. bc she was committing crimes and in his head he was like#yeaaaah she's wrong. but she's also not hurting anyone per se. and she's so pretty. let me turn a blind eye it's fine#these were more generic ideas that newell subsequently rewrapped in new skin and then further developed along a political lens#but i think a lot of people comparatively prefer bronze age selina bc it fully embraced a romance in the most traditional sense#so at the end of the day a lot of the fan sentiment really comes down to preferring wish fulfillment over good storytelling. at least imo#bronze age selina to me is one of the most boring characters ever. and i also hate that she has to 'prove' she's no longer villainous to br#to bruce. and the fact that he suspects her. like since the 40s it's been word of law by the ogs that bruce Doesn't suspect her#he's the first person to not suspect her while everyone around him is judging him for it#i know writers and perspectives change etc etc but when that's what the original creators of both characters are telling you#i feel like it has to hold some weight#so yeah. bronze age might as well be the shit under my shoe it's so boring and bland and most of all ahistorical#bronze age batkat i mean
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sapphicautistic · 1 year ago
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My gf was listening to "White Blank Page" by Mumford and Sons and I once again told her that song is SO much better if it's gay.
She doesn't listen to the lyrics of songs but she's extremely good at literary analysis and this time she actually looked up the lyrics and has now come to the following conclusion: "It makes no sense if it's not gay."
My (objectively best) reading is this:
The narrator was in love with a guy who strung him along, never willing to be in a committed (or public) relationship with him and maybe insisting that it's extremely heterosexual "helping a bro out" sex, except in more intimate moments. Finally out of nowhere guy is suddenly committed to a woman and when Narrator confronted him, guy spat out homophobic vitriol and claimed he's not gay like the Narrator.
(For extra flavor imagine them as closeted, straight passing Midwestern flannel wearing, love-bonfires-and-camping guys who sat next to each other at church and elbowed and annoyed each other like best friends do and were each other's go-to source of emotional support! And then to suddenly shut Narrator out for the first time ever, by abruptly marrying a woman and insisting that he's always been straight and their relationship meant nothing...)
Here are the lyrics:
Can you lie next to her And give her your heart, your heart As well as your body? And can you lie next to her And confess your love, your love As well as your folly? And can you kneel before the king And say, "I'm clean! I'm clean!" ? But tell me now, where was my fault In loving you with my whole heart? Oh, tell me now, where was my fault In loving you with my whole heart? A white blank page and a swelling rage, rage You did not think When you sent me to the brink, to the brink You desired my attention But denied my affections, my affections So tell me now, where was my fault In loving you with my whole heart? Oh, tell me now, where was my fault In loving you with my whole heart? Lead me to the truth and I Will follow you with my whole life Oh, lead me to the truth and I Will follow you with my whole life
Why call multiple people "you" in a totally unclear way? Why would you claim that your female ex's new man can't love her AT ALL (not just as much as you did, AT ALL)? And invoking the judgment of God is so fucking tedious if you're just shaming your female ex for moving on or even cheating/getting with your friend. Also you look like a creepy asshole if you think a girl broke up with you for "loving her too much".
This song is tepid, badly written, and makes the narrator look like an asshole if it's NOT gay.
The gay reading is the ONLY compelling one.
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bidaryl · 1 year ago
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the thing about twd fic dying off around s6/s7 is that plot lines and characters beyond that are barely incorporated and included so now we're forever stuck reading about fucking negan being the biggest baddest killer to ever walk the earth and the whisperers and reapers and governors are left in the dust. for once i just wanna read about negan being the Alexandria Outcast: Hated By Most, Needed By Some, and let alpha or the fucking commonwealth be the monster at the end of the story. please
#like don't get me wrong he truly was that bitch for a hot season or two there but please.#im too tired to word any of this right i just think that having negan as the only villain in fics is boring#and i would instead like to read about#the trials and tribulations of him trying to co-raise a child with a guy that thinks showering is Optional#and would also like to go into the whole negan and judith being friends and daryl raising judith and daryl and negan#having grief with each other over shit that genuinely fucking matters and is impossible to sweep under the rug but also the fact that theyre#both trying so fucking hard to do right by the kids#that doesnt make sense. Whatever#IN THE HOT TIME TRAVEL FIX IT AU that lives in my head#where everything from the start til the finale happens#with some extra bits and pieces too#where everyone that survived til the end wakes up at the start again and Remembers#but everyone thats dead forgets#negan rocks up at the prison gates with actual lucille by his side#laura and franklin behind him#knocks on the gate all little pig little pig let me in. cos he thinks hes funny. and its a prison#and daryl. whos on watch. is like. No. Fuck this guy. Fuck no#and maggie's like. Absolutely not. Fuck no x2#and negans like. I had a choice. And I Made it. and now I'm here.#i told you what i'd do if i could do it all over again. turns out; i can't.#if you wont take me i get it. But you gotta accept lucille. brought her all the way here cos i knew if she fucking stood a chance;#it'd be with you lot.#OKAY WELL shit it more complex than that but this is tumblr tags and also im tired. but u get the jist#anyway. fic where negans with team family from earlier on the road and then they all have to sort out their Feelings and shit
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lord-squiggletits · 2 years ago
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Sorry for being negative, I’m just a bit disappointed that after looking through the Earthspark Optimus tags on and off on different occasions weeks apart, it seems like the only thing the fandom has to say about ES Optimus is finger snaps and dad jokes. :/ (And also a handful of people already trying to frame him as a bad person lmao)
Watch for it, when more episodes of Earthspark come out and a conflict with GHOST inevitably arises, people are going to be raging at Optimus for being “stupid” or “self-righteous” or “blind” for working with GHOST and start calling Megatron and/or the Decepticons right about everything because they spent so long focusing on “haha funny dad Optimus” that they forgot about the other parts of Optimus’ character like... idk, not wanting to colonize planets? Not wanting to start wars with entire species that didn’t want to be involved in the war in the first place? Being willing to make compromises even at risk to himself and his own because he wants to treat everyone fairly?
Idk I guess I’m just a bit salty because it genuinely seems like all this fandom wants is “funny dad Optimus” and nothing else. Like you will give them funny dad Optimus who’s ALSO complex and morally gray but people will only ever talk about the former part. And then when Optimus inevitably makes a mistake and bad things happen, people are probably going to treat him as if he’s stupid or an asshole when he ends up not being the Perfect Unproblematic Fave that people seemingly want him to be.
#negativity#the tf fandom has protagonist centered morality really badly#like yes we all joke/think that humans are the most boring part of transformers#but there's a difference between that as like a narrative preference in a story#versus literally acting like humans don't matter#and a lot of takes i see in earthspark and other continuities#seem to completely ignore the fact that cybertronians securing their future on earth and eliminating the people who want to do them wrong#would literally mean stealing resources from humans and killing them aka COLONIZING THEM#so i see people calling OP a bad leader or stupid or overly trusting for working with GHOST when he's literally no such thing#he explicitly says 'we are guests on this planet' and acknowledges that he sees GHOST merely as his best option and doesn't fully trust them#but ppl in this fandom have a really infantile perspective of optimus#where they want him to be Good All The Time or they just see him as an idiot for some reason#so they see OP making compromises to not hurt humans (people who didn't even want to get involved with cybertron's war)#and theyre like durr hurr he's stupid! he's ignorant! he's an asshole to the decepticons!#no he's not he's literally just trying to not hurt innocent people? and he has to balance both human lives and cybertronian lives#and that's fucking hard and there are no perfect options and there are no outcomes where no one will get hurt#and the existence of those bad choices doesn't make optimus stupid or malicious#it makes him a FUCKING PERSON#trying to navigate a HARD SITUATION and do the right thing#but we can't have optimus being an actual character who behaves like a human being#he has to be perfect daddy prime that does nothing wrong ever and if he does he's a STUPID ASSHOLE ugh
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RIP Alastair Carstairs you would’ve loved Masie Peters
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tibtew · 1 year ago
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*sigh* something something the two-dimensionality of saeru's characterisation is a writing flaw, not a feature, and trying to pass it off as a feature whilst berating anyone who sees it as a flaw is uh. A Choice
#like we all know jin's writing isn't exactly stellar#kgpr got popular because of the characterisation of the Protagonists#but jin writes saeru poorly. I've never believed otherwise#he only really tried to do something interesting with the character in the manga... but saeru was always more of a symbol. which is Boring#but again#not the Main Point of kgpr so it's not a big deal#but that isn't to say that making saeru interesting weakens the narrative???#just that the story functions without him being overly complex and stuff#some of themes however are so Fucked by his character it's so sad#could write a whole essay about how shit the whole idea of monsterhood becomes when saeru is presented the way he is outside of the manga#that entire spiel seto has about “real monsters” in novel 8 is so eugh#I'd love to pretend that's just his perspective but it's so clearly word of god#I also feel like shutting down arguments in favour of deeper characterisation with “well he's a metaphor for trauma”#inadvertently oversimplifies trauma#I have more to say but I'm tiredddd#txt#not tagging and shit because I don't want people in my notes arguing with a wall#idc if you like your saeru simple I just hate the fact that people frame it as right/wrong thing#I think when people complain about complex saeru weakening the narrative they're more so annoyed that some fans#want to give him the same sort of complexity the protags have#like I promise you I'm not trying to turn him into a hero here lol I just think jin couldn't write him very well#and there are things to explore with the little things jin Did write#idk why the concept of even thinking about those things annoys some people sm#“he's a murderer” he's a narrative tool within a story. some guys in a corner brainrotting over him won't make Your blorbos less interestin#or make his actions widely justified/glorified#I Promise
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deus-ex-mona · 2 years ago
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why can’t this week just end alreadyyyyyyy
#rant about the week incomin’ in the tags bc ‘complaining’ is my unofficial middle name#this week has *not* been my week so far and it’s only wednesday morning#my horrible week commenced on sunday night when i was unable to sleep bc my pillow was oriented wrong#thus i had a grand total of 1 hour of sleep which was not very poggers tbh. so i tried to sleep on the train but…#the guy next to me??? kept swaying to lean on my shoulder??? so i hunched over to avoid physical contact but he just landed on my back??#so that sucked balls. i kept having to wake up to push him away with my bag and then trying to go back to sleep.#but then!!! just as i fell asleep after one such instance!!! the guy’s phone alarm went off????? like?? why???? why would you set an alarm??#we’re on a friggin train mannnnn!!!!! why did you have to set an alarm?????????????#and ofc when the dude finally alighted (and i was asleep) he just *had* to jab me in the side with his elbow when he got up. ಠ_ಠ#so that’s how i knew the rest of the week was gonna be just ✨peachy✨#anyways manning 2 workstations (+ 1 bonus ‘mini’ workstation) on 1h of sleep isn’t very fun. esp if you’re incompetent af like me#and ofc there just had to be problems too. like the printers couldn’t print (and the systems crashed everytime i tried to print something)#and this sample running software kept closing itself in the middle of running samples so that was a pain to deal with#and tuesday (yesterday) wasn’t much better. in fact it was ✨worse✨. none of the 2 workstations could get started till like 10am and aaaaaa—#to make matters worse i had stubbed my toe so badly in the morning that my skin tore. so walking was ✨much pain✨ as well :(#and ofc yesterday had to be the one day where i had to walk back and forth an unnecessarily high number of times >:( sadded#and ofc they *had* to have an hour-long meeting about something or other towards the end of the workday when i had yet to eat my lunch >:(#(fell asleep during the meeting though bc it was boring as balls whoops)#and i could only take a half-hour break after that >:((( i wanted my full hour dammitttttttt#and ofc it was raining when i left and ofc it took like 25 mins for me to hail a taxi on this booking app bc i didn’t want to take the train#and ofccccc i misheard the taxi driver when he arrived and he roasted my chinese speaking skills. and ofcccc we were caught in a traffic jam#(i had a really nice hour long nap in the cab though so thanks traffic jam)#and thus ended my terrible 2 past weekdays. i’m drained af and it’s *only* wednesday morning????!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i’m mentally looping anzu no uta (imascg) to cope. ‘nu-uh i don’t wanna work’ so true anzu#i just wanna sleeeeeeep and wake up this weekend or sth idk it’s too early in the year for this#it is suiyoubi my dudes#may spam self-rb my monster-length character image/gif posts later to cope. you have been warned
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arolesbianism · 1 year ago
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Wendy and Abby fuck me up so bad just like in general but what keeps coming back to haunt me is wondering how long they had to go through it all just them two. How many times did Wendy die, how many times did Abby watch the light fading from the eyes of her twin. How many times was it slow, how many times was it in a split moment, how many times were they together when it happened, how many times did Wendy die completely alone. It's just like god damn no wonder Wendy talks Like That not only did Abby die but poor kid has been forced to become accustomed with death in a much more direct way than even adults are built to handle
#rat rambles#dst#and like if I may read more into these characters than was probably intended#I feel like a lot of abby's in game behavior just clicks once you look at her from a oh this kid has watched her sibling die a Lot#like no wonder shes so protective#also love how abby's constant wandering and twirling also adds up like yeah shes a bored kid with too much energy#but yeah I think ppl tend to not realize just how big a part being stuck in the constant is in regards to hashtag wendy depression moments#although its reasonable since not everyone has read all of this brats dialogue like me <3#dont read all of wendy's dialogue you will feel your brain melting like 5 minutes in#but yeah wendy brings up the whole being stuck in the constant thing a Lot#and wendy is under no illusion that death is an escape in fact he brings up the fact that its not quite a bit too#oh and I think ppl get the flavor of wendy's suicidal thoughts wrong most of the time#hes currently much more in the go to sleep and not wake up flavor than the I want to be with my lost loved one flavor#its less abt wanting to die and more abt wanting to stop being able to be in pain#luckily thing have technically gotten better for the both of them#like ofc theyre still fucked up and traumatized and still Being traumatized but at least theyre not alone#theres some sense of normalcy. wendy has friends now and in theory so does abby.#they can afford to just be kids again. not always unfortunately but much more than before#shit still sucks but at least they have the other survivors now
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i-am-become-a-name · 2 years ago
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What's your interpretation of the weird/annoyed look Five gets on his face when Tegan announces that she wants to rejoin the TARDIS at the end of Arc of Infinity? I know it was probably meant to be played for laughs, but it annoys me every time i watch that episode and i'm curious what headcanons people have about it.
My favourite thing I've read about it pointed out that the cybermen specifically used Tegan as a weakness against five, that she's what it took to manipulate him (and through no fault of either of them, Adric's death was part of those consequences.) The novelisation really goes in to the descriptions of the doctor transfixed with the blood running down Tegan's chin from her bitten lip, the building tension as the cybermen get closer and closer to killing her and he's shaking trying to hold himself back from admitting his hearts are so easy to twist, just by threatening his friends. (Does Nyssa ever leave the TARDIS when it's on the spaceship? The cybermen don't even know she exists til they come onboard do they?)
As for why he looks so annoyed? hmmm. Does anyone want someone around that constantly needles them? Really, I think pre Arc of Infinity that even though Tegan had chosen to stay, they still had that power imbalance or even just tension between them that she had not come on board willingly. So five is expecting that to be the continuing, I don't know, continuing manner between them and it hadn't been good. It had its moments (mainly in the audios) but as an arrangement it was not ideal as friends to explore the universe together, all that terrible beauty and awesome monsters.
But it doesn't continue on in that manner - oh they bicker and make faces at each other, sure, but Tegan's conscious decision to step back onto the TARDIS irons out those imbalances, removes that bitterness and the past of her aunt's death. So when he makes that wee face, it's in expectation of the previous status quo. And never let it be said that Tegan's one to do exactly what's expected of her.
Anyway I really hope this makes sense and I may add some more thoughts later but it's 1:50 am Christmas Eve and I couldn't sleep for thinking about this.
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It's 2am I'm back. I feel like there's also this uneasiness in five about tegan, that mirror that no one likes being held up to themselves. Their similarities but the starkly different ways they express them must be exhausting to five. and here she is back again. To push and prod and challenge and be brashly beautifully glorious. wait. that last bit was the two am shipper coming out. Anyway they draw strength and resolve and anger from each other and Tegan was vital to five, from his first moments till his very last.
#again sorry if it's not coherent but it's been a WEEK. and it's still going.#look away if you're not interested because whatever it's my boring life stuff but. worked sunday and tuesday. thursday my boss texted me#did i want to go up to the next largest city flights and accomodation paid and worked for two weeks at their branch of our shop.#(i said no thank you but holy sht.) and that whole day we'd been taking the house apart looking for dads santa outfit for reading#night before christmas to the kids. utterly gone. nowhere to be found. sister said she had one so we were like oof we can relax it's fine.#sister did not in fact have one. so we took the house apart again. still not here. friday i went out and bought the fabric and fur to Make#one (six straight hours work on the jacket alone) and the kids come up to decorate their trees.#oh! and! when i went in to work to buy the fur (i can only purchase stuff of managers it's store policy) she was like. you can't leave the#shop. stay here. and i went no???? have i done something wrong??? but another manager came down and the managers had put together little#Christmas gift bags for everyone which is so sweet because i still feel like I'm there on sufferance even though it's been like 4 months.#but then. seven o'clock or so when i was still cutting up panne velvet i get an email from the boss who offered me the chch opportunity -#he's now quitting his position at our store. two weeks notice. so I'm stressed about that because we had a good thing going where he'd text#me once a week. we'd arrange extra shifts and that was it. what if the new store manager sucks or hates me or something??#and I've got like five half finished advent fics but i just. don't have the spoons between work tired and c19 brain fog and christmas tired#anyway none of this is about five and Tegan I'm so sorry i just need about ten more weighted blankets on me.#five#tegan#an ask a palpable ask#srsly i love being asked about them or any dw opinions you are so wonderful in my eyes#tbh the advent fics are getting to the point i might just post them all the way through January and when i write little ficlets. people#seem vaguely to be enjoying them but trying to do a December thing was a bit much.#I've just realised this week was even longer. last Saturday we spent the whole day out of town with the kids. and Tuesday we went out of#town to do the stuff we'd planned to do before we had to babysit them on our planned trip day. jfc no wonder I can't brain straight
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jrueships · 1 year ago
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i don't know but you are that frog to me.
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