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coreancitizen · 13 days ago

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How did Jeong Tae Eul's ID end up with Lee Gon in the first place?

Tracking the journey between worlds and across time

There was a Twitter question about which show you'd like to watch again for the first time and I, of course, responded with "The King Eternal Monarch." I just remember how much fun it was trying to figure things out. A friend even had a virtual "murder board" for who's who LOL! In a reply to my tweet, someone asked: How did Jeong Tae Eul's ID end up with Lee Gon in the first place?

TKEM has one of those loop thingies with time travel so lemme just start with episode 1, with adult Lee Gon heading to the past, to the Night of the Treason. He gets into a shootout with Lee Lim's men, kills several, and after they escape, he goes to check on his younger version. As Gon feels the boy's pulse, Baby Gon lifts his hand. They hear an alert that the Royal Guards are coming so Gon stands up. Baby Gon catches the lanyard and pulls Tae Eul's ID card out of Gon's pocket.

In a flashback in episode 2, Baby Gon, now the king, asks Head Court Lady Noh if she has the two things he had with him on the Night of the Treason: half of the flute, which he suspected was in the riding whip she held, and the ID card. Head Court Lady Noh produces both.

And so that's how Lee Gon keeps Tae Eul's ID card with him in the kingdom for the next 25 years. In episode 1, we see Lee Gon has it inside a copy of "Alice in Wonderland," with the ID card right smack on top of the illustration of the White Rabbit. Symbolism much? LOL! The book, of course, is referenced a few times by both Lee Gon and Jeong Tae Eul.

One of the more interesting details of the time travel in TKEM is that at this precise moment (Sept. 10, 2019 at 7:45 p.m.), when Lee Gon is looking at Jeong Tae Eul's ID card while sitting in his private study in the Kingdom of Corea, the card doesn't actually exist YET in the Republic of Corea.

When Lee Gon decides to follow the White Rabbit, or rather the sound of the flute, into the other world and meets Jeong Tae Eul for the first time, she has an entirely different ID, one that shows her in her police uniform with her hair down.

This ID card is still with Tae Eul in episode 4 when she leaves the library (where she'd been researching parallel words, etc.). As she approaches her car, she finds her keys with the big-ass tchotchke in the form of a lion tangled with the lanyard of her ID. As she was separating the two, she is bumped by a boy on a bicycle, sending the ID card flying out of her hands and down a grate, straight to the sewer below.

BTW, the culprit on the bike is none other flute boy (fun fact: flute/yo-yo boy is actually played by a girl, Kim Bo Min).

Jeong Tae Eul gets her photo taken for a new ID card. She has her hair pulled back in a low ponytail and wears a cream sweater. The photographer advises her to put on something with a bit more contrast so her face doesn't stand out too much in the photo. Tae Eul opts for a navy jacket. And while she is not aware of her outfit's significance, we see the image Lee Gon has been staring at for 25 years.

Later, we see Tae Eul apply for a new ID card. Hilariously, she says the old one was "lost after a fierce scuffle with a suspect." She remembers Lee Gon telling her the ID card he has was issued on Nov. 11, 2019, and so she asks the civil service worker when the new one is going to be ready. Much to her relief, she's told about a week, in late October.

BUT Fate has other plans, of course. Kang Shin Jae tosses Tae Eul her ID. The agency apologized for accidentally leaving her out. Her ID was issued that day: Nov. 11, 2019. Lee Gon was right! Tae Eul is justifiably flustered. She gets even more flustered when she gets a phone call from Lee Gon.

She rushes home and finds Lee Gon standing in her yard, like a freaking statue. This is one of my favorite TKEM scenes ever but I'm gonna rush the summary here: Tae Eul asks Gon details about her new card, which he is able to answer correctly, proving he does have a version of her ID. He invites her to his world so she can see for herself. She accepts.

In the kingdom (episode 5), Jeong Tae Eul is asked by Head Court Lady Noh to put her belongings in a box as part of a security check. Lee Gon assures her it's something everyone does including court ladies and the prime minister. Tae Eul tosses in handcuffs, her wallet, the lion tchotchke, a Kahi multibalm stick lol and, of course, her newly reissued ID. She seeks assurance that she's gonna get all the stuff back, saying she'll be penalized if she loses her ID again. Head Court Lady Noh recognizes the ID.

Fast-forward to episode 6. Japanese warships are heading to Corean waters and Lee Gon has to send Jeong Tae Eul home earlier than planned. Lady Noh retrieves the box with Tae Eul's belongings — side-eyeing palace security here as the unlocked box is stored in a dresser in her room — and realizes the ID is missing. No way to check who took it as the CCTV was cut off in that area of the palace last night starting at 8 (because of JTE's unexpected arrival). Tae Eul ends up taking back the "old" version of her ID card.

So where did the newly re-issued ID card go? It shows up tucked inside a book in the bookstore of one of Lee Lim's minions with a note identifying it as "guestroom user." We later find out that Lee Lim's contact is no other than Kang Shin Jae's Corean mom, a court lady who has Lady Noh's trust.

In episode 11, Lee Lim captures Tae Eul's Corean doppelganger, Luna, and convinces her to switch places with our heroine by showing her the ID card and Tae Eul's family. Luna, who'd never known her parents, agrees. She's taken to republic with Tae Eul's ID and picks up Tae Eul's phone at a locker in a station. Her first order of business: Apply to take all of Tae Eul's 21-day vacation. Smart, LOL.

This is around the time Lee Lim's men kidnap Jeong Tae Eul and take her to the kingdom. Lee Lim plans to exchange her for Lee Gon's half of the flute. But she foils that plan by escaping and we get the famous "Protect her! She's the future queen!" battle cry from the king.

Jeong Tae Eul eventually returns to the republic with Lee Gon in episode 13. After introducing her boyfriend to her dad, she arranges to meet Gon after work. She gifts him with a black jacket, which he thinks looks a bit familiar. Later, as he's trying it on, the doorbell for his hotel room rings and he finds Tae Eul at the door bringing beer. It doesn't take him long to realize it's Luna he's with — she's got a look of anxiety that JTE doesn't have. He pulls Tae Eul's ID from Luna's coat pocket. As he's checking it out, he notices his image in the mirror and realization dawns, he looks exactly like the man who came to Cheonjongo on the Night of the Treason and saved Baby Gon. He saved himself!

Unfortunately, Luna had spiked the beer and Lee Gon goes down, ID card still in his hand at the beginning of episode 14. As Luna tries to search for the whip that contains the flute — she's not interested in taking his life — Jo Yeong arrives (he'd gone out to get drinks). She flees, minus the ID. The captain of the Royal Guard, with Tae Eul's help, takes him to a clinic owned by a friend of the medical examiner (Chief Park's wife). When Lee Gon comes to, he could hear the flute crying, just like he did when he was a boy on the Night of the Treason. It is the signal to go back. He enters the doors once again, ID card still in his pocket, as Lee Lim enters his, enabling them both to return to the past to try to fix things.

And we're back on the Night of the Treason. Lee Gon arrives at Cheonjongo and gets into a shootout with Lee Lim's men.

#the king eternal monarch #TKEM meta #kdramas #kim go eun #lee min ho #jeong tae eul #lee gon

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eggtartz · 1 year ago

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✧ 30th October ✧

Keegan Russ // Humps (f! lance corporal reader)

kinktober masterlist

warnings : dry humping, mutual attraction, keegan is cocky because well i think he is, handjob

grunts could be heard followed a loud thud. "damn it.." you laid on the mat, nose bloody and panting as keegan, your so-called senior is looking down to you, a busted lip but he's still standing anyway. "you fought good, but you're not gonna get better if you keep repeating your fighting skills. i believe you owe me twenty" he smirked as you kicked his hand away. "asshole" you spouted as he laughed.

"looks like the rookie is hurt, huh?" you sat up and hissed at him "i'm not a rookie anymore! i'm already a lance corporal and you know that" you adjusted your compression shirt as you stood up. "still, you're a rookie to me" he taunted, picking me on your ponytail but you elbowed him. he dodged it, of course. he can predicts your movement now, considering how often the two of you spar.

"what did i just said? you're not gonna get any better repeating all your fighting skills" he whispered, close enough his eyes behind his mask are staring into yours. "the enemy doesn't fucking know that" you said again, kicking his shin for him to fall but he dodged another of your kick, pulling you on his body as he caged your hands behind your back.

"i certainly do, though. don't you think so, sweetheart?" he's taunting you again as you rolled your eyes, using your teeth to bite on his arm as he lets you go but he knocks your back as you crawled away and trapped your body under him. "biting, huh? i thought dirty tactics weren't your thing?" he tilted his head "well, someone told me i'm not gonna get better" you copied his words as he laughed.

"you're funny, sweetheart" he said "that's why you're my favorite" he said again.

"pardon?"

he chuckled "you're always so dense, you know that? don't you think it's a bit weird that i choose you instead of merrick or ajax to spar with?" he raised his brow as you tilted your head. "you like me? keegan that's like a wrong thing to do!" you said as he sighed "it is isn't it? well, you don't have to do anything about it. i'm just glad i got to get it out of my chest" he said, standing up and pulling your hand to stand up. "but just because i like you doesn't mean that i'll go easy on the spars alright?" he winked.

as he was about to leave you pulled his hand gently, surprisingly. "maybe.. maybe we can make it work" you said. keegan fully turned to you "how?"

well..

safe to say? that late in the night while every barracks lights went off, only keegan's are still on. no one would question it since he's a superior so here you are straddling him and kissing him feverishly while his hand roamed around your back and your thighs. "damn i never knew you liked me too" he smirked, kissing your already sweaty neck. "you could've told me, if i was in a different team it'll be less problems" you said again. keegan grunted "i don't mind. i'll do anything to have you with me" he bit your collarbone as you emitted a whimper. "don't say things that you don't mean, keegan" you almost snarled.

he takes off his mask entirely and grabs your hair "you know i don't lie, sweetheart. i'll do it" he said again as you groaned. the sensation of him pulling your hair was making your head swirling and you found yourself grinding on him. his thin pants met with his cargo pants as you grind on his clothed dick. "shit, is that your plan? fucking yourself on me?" he slapped your butt for your attention as you almost screamed. "y-yeah.. can i?" you asked so politely, keegan wonders if you've done this before.

"sure, let me just-" he lifted you to sit on his thighs while he pulled down his flyer. "go on, make a mess out of yourself" he said as you bit your lips, slowly humping his thighs. his thighs hasn't always looked big because he's always wearing those loose pants that serves him no justice because holy shit his firm things edge you. you rubbed yourself on him as you saw he pulled out his cock.

you almost went on your knees as keegan slowly bought his hands to pump his dick. "go on" his eyes bore into your movements on his thighs. deciding to give him a show, you pulled your pants down and climbed on his thighs again, your cunt scratching on the fabric of his pants. he groaned, the folds of your wet pussy was rubbing on him and he was enthralled. his hands moved up and down faster, squeezing the tip when he was about to bust.

your hand slithered to his balls, massaging them with care as his breathing hitched. "shit.. if you do that, i'm gonna cum real quick" he growled. you smiled, bouncing a slightly bit as you whimpered. "do it.. cum, keegan" your giggles and seductive purrs sent him busting, the white, creamy cum stained his hands and some on yours. you bring yourself to lick his hand clean, humping yourself to the taste of it. "you're really good, huh? what a good sweetheart" he smiled as he also moved his thighs t meet with your grindings. you gasped when he hits your clit, a jolt of sensation felt at the back of your head.

"found it"

he smirked, bringing your hips to hump his thighs faster with the force of his strength. the wetness from your pussy leaked into his pants, making the friction much more delicious, the squelching sounds getting more sinful. you slump against keegan as he brings his fingers to your mouth as you gagged on them. "there you go. i wanna see you becoming a filthy mess" he hissed as your pussy clenched at the words, arousal helping your orgasm.

accompanied with muffled whimpers and moans, you came undone on his thighs as your cum oozes into his fabric. he raised your hips to see his soiled pants and smiled. "on the bed." he stripped, ensuring you two are far from over.

#call of duty smut #call of duty fanfic #call of duty #call of duty ghosts #call of duty x reader #keegan russ #call of duty keegan #cod keegan #cod smut #cod fanfic #cod x reader #keegan ghosts #cod ghosts #keegan smut #keegan russ smut #keegan russ x reader #kinktober entry ♡˖

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d8nielaa · 2 months ago

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it's me again 👀 i need some dan fluff. i'm thinking about the heat wave we had in nyc this summer and just like living together in his apartment and the AC isnt working so you're both half dressed and sweaty and having to walk to the theater and just being so in love LOL i need him

Authors note: back again!!!! Yess i love these Dan requests. It’s October and where i live, we’re getting a random heat wave so..this is relatable!!

Summer Lovin’

Dan Berry x fem!reader

Summertime was my favorite. The sun was always out, and so were the people. The weather felt nice, and it gave me the opportunity to wear more free and flowey clothes. That was until, the heat wave struck. Heat waves weren’t uncommon during the summer here in New York, but this one was brutal. It didn’t help that me and Dan’s AC unit broke. Our fan was no good and we could only take so many cold showers.

Currently, i was on the couch in my bra and jean shorts. Using a hand fan, I tried to cool myself off, but I simply couldn’t. The blistering and disgusting New York City heat was the worst thing i had ever felt. I let out a huff, looking up at the ceiling. I heard soft footsteps patterning against the floor, which I knew were Dan’s. He plopped on the couch next to me, also in just his shorts. No shirt or anything. Which was honestly, hot. I turned my fan and began to fan him, trying to bring him as much relief as possible. He wrapped an arm around my bare waist, but i pushed him off. He whined, looking up at me for an explanation.

“It’s to hot to cuddle, and your too warm”

“So? Cuddle with me …please” he said, giving me those eyes I knew I couldn’t say no to. I sighed, moving his arm to rest around my waist. He smiled softly, letting out a hum of contentment. He moved more up, his hands holding the sides of my waist as he began to trail warm kisses up my neck. I sighed once more, leaning my head back to give him more access. I laced my fingers through his curly hair, tugging on the strands slightly as I spoke.

“What time are you goin’ to the theater?”

“Mhh we’re leaving around 6:30” He mumbled in between kisses, his hands now moving to your back, keeping you firmly pressed against his chest.

“We?”

“Yeah-to hot to leave you here.” Dan mumbled out once more, more focused on the kisses than actually speaking. He didn’t want to leave you here in the blistering heat. Your heart melted even more at the thought. You knew it was no use of arguing, because you knew it was for the better.

Dan began placing kisses on my jawline, his lips slowly moving up and hovering over my own. I felt his hot, ragged breath over my lips. I then leaned in, kissing him softly yet passionately. My fingers tugged at his hair as we continued the kiss, my legs now wrapping around his waist. We made out for a while, before 6:30 rolled around.

You two left the apartment, hand in hand, ready to take on the heat. The walk felt longer than normal, your feet aching and back sweaty as you made the trip. Dan was also sweaty, but he didn’t really care since he was gonna sweat later anyhow. You soon got to the theater, the cool air hitting you instantly as you stepped inside. You walked with Dan, following him to his and Kevin William Paul’s dressing room. Nights like these were your favorite. Getting to hang out with Dan before the show, and seeing the show for free? Not just seeing the show, but your talented boyfriend and his friends who he admired. God, I love that man.

Authors note: hi loves!! Sorry this one is a little short, im super tired and writing this late at night…anyway, hope you enjoyed!!

#the outsiders musical #the outsiders x reader #x reader #dan berry #dan berry x reader #paul holden

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hollywoodsargeant · 1 year ago

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For the ask meme! When did you get into logan??

EXCELLENT QUESTION. for funzies i'm gonna give the unnecessarily long answer

i didn't even get into f1 in general until last june (2022 canada was the first gp i watched) but i do remember when logan won the silverstone f2 race bc it was fourth of july weekend and also he was the first american to win a formula 2 race so like Big Deal! then williams announced he would drive FP1 in austin and i was like wow that's an early announcement seeing how that race is in like october but cool! american! i'm an american! but in general i wasn't paying much attention to him

either way when he did inevitably do that practice session (+ then several more) and williams announced he'd be their driver if he got the SL points i made him my twitter pfp for a while. still not like a diehard fan but i wanted to see him in that seat (again. american) and i was trying to spite someone MOVING ON... but yea idk. then clearly he got the seat and i was like cool! i have a very preliminary ranking of the 2023 grid that has him as my sixth my favorite driver which Uhm. wrong answer but you tried </3

and i actually do not know what happened but in february like before pre-season testing i wrote my first loscar fic and that was the beginning of the end i think. i know i made this blog in march? uhm at some point during i think my fall semester i watched that silverstone f2 race he won and i have since seen that race in entirety like seven times even though it's FUCKING BORING. whatever. i bought a tshirt (my first mistake) and i have a snap memory from march of me wearing said tshirt that says "idk who my favorite f1 driver is anymore" GIRL I HAVE SOME NEWS FOR YOU... so we're gonna call the beginning of the end like february and the point of no return about march. idk

i'm blaming old prema videos fyi like before i knew it Boom i was logan sargeant's biggest fan. and if you didn't know my fav driver before was pierre and every time i did/do something that feels a bit much i'm like "did i do this with pierre?" and 9 times out of 10 the answer is NO. shoutout to my immediate need to put him on everything ever i have. entirely too much merch for what it's worth

+ extra thing i distinctly remember my uncle mentioning "i hope that american guy gets a seat" over the summer last year and when i saw him last month i was wearing my logan cap and he immediately hit me with "nice cap! logan sargeant!" so he is valid and i love him

#ask #ik i said long answer but this still feels excessive #sorry for the life story idk #the root of the problem i think is american #and he is just a silly dumb boy #watch old prema videos and feel yourself lose the last of your marbles #that is my advice

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gifsbysimplysonia · 1 year ago

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Feliz cumpleaños to my favorite lead singer who for some reason is still wearing the American Eagle Dip Dye flannel I bought him in 2018 🥰 that Rafaela threw to Diony who has always been SO kind to me and my friends when it came to a7x. What a run on sentence 😄 And after the cut is way more nonsensical but intensely personal rambling about this dude. You've been warned.

I been a fan of this dude for coming up on 18 years now- wtaf!!!! And for a very nice stretch of time, I was extremely blessed to see him after shows to talk for a minute or three (though to be honest, i was tongue tied most of the time and just 👀 lol).

At that time in my life, people I admired didn't treat me that great. I was constantly looked at or treated in a way that made me extremely self conscious; I was constantly the oldest fan at shows without kids and I've always been fat and not too attractive in the face. Then I'd be meeting musicians or wrestlers I was so excited to be supporting only to have them act like it was a chore to take a photo with me or keep a distance when doing so...only to hug and smile and be super enthused when moving onto the skinny pretty fans next in line. My self esteem was non existent.

Then I met this dude for the first time, on a sunny warm day in April 2006, Houston Texas. He waved me and my friend across the street, signed our stuff, was fine to take photos with us, and when it was my turn he put his arm around me without hesitation. That one tiny gesture that I'm betting he didn't think about at all meant so much to me. All he did was treat me like he treated everyone else (which I saw that night after the show as he was the only one from the band to come to the group of fans waiting around, and he signed all the things and took so many photos), and something in my heart shifted a bit. Spesh after I looked down and realized he was barefoot? Dude stood there for 4 or 5 minutes, in bare feet, on warm concrete as he signed stuff and took pics before he went onto his bus. Liiiiiiike....

After that, every run in was the same or better as his behavior remained consistently kind and respectful. For me and my friends, Shadows became a kind of unofficial mascot cuz if we didn't see any of his band mates after a show, we seemed to always see him. He always was attentive to whomever was speaking to him, and even when it was the same question for the one millionth time (when are you gonna scream again?!?! 🙄), he would patiently answer. Dude constantly made time for fans, and even in the more recent years when the band wasn't touring, he has demonstrated that he cares A LOT about fans and wants to try and give them the best experience possible (even if they fight him tooth and nail).

I haven't had the pleasure of seeing him face-to-face since April 2011 and to be an absolute brat for a moment 😫😫😫 But my 2 besties got to meet the band when their last album, The Stage, was released. I think October 2016 but, like, don't quote me cuz I'm the worst with dates if they aren't on my list, ha. There were meet n greets in NY and LA; @psycholunatics went to NY and @jillybean1217 went to LA and both had wonderful experiences. I'm always grateful when my besties are treated like the Queens that they are🙏🏼🙏🏼

Back in January 2018, my friend at the time Rafaela went with me to a show in Green Bay Wisconsin despite not being a fan of the band (forever grateful to her for helping me drive AND for being the one to use her magic to make stuff happen, as she did for me CONSTANTLY in life). Thanks to her, the American Eagle Dip Dye flannel I bought him - cuz his other ones at the time looked wrecked:

Got into the hands of their tour manager. And IMAGINE MY ELATION AND DISBELIEF when HE WORE IT THE NEXT DANG NIGHT?!?!? From my IG post at the time it happened:

I'm cringe and I know that. But, like, joy? Is so difficult to find so when I find it, I have a habit of clinging to it like a crab. Cuz it often seems to come out of nowhere, so randomly, and for SO LONG I believed myself to be a person who wasn't WORTHY of good things happening to them, or who was conditioned by how I was treated to think I wasn't WORTHY of basic respect. And honestly, this dude is just someone who has been SO consistently kind and things he had NO CLUE would mean anything to me (like wearing this shirt) would happen & hit me at times in life I really needed a pick-me-up or reminder that there is good in the world.

Since January 2018, my friends and I have spotted the flannel out in the world 13 times, with the 13th being JUST LAST WEEK at a show in Canada. I will forever be impressed with Shadows actually keeping and wearing stuff til he can't wear it anymore (that white Metallica tee? Who knows which one I mean? 😄) AND I will forever shake my head in disbelief anytime I see him wearing this American Eagle Dip Dye flannel cuz like....🥰

Here's wishing him the happiest of birthdays, sending him gratitude for the person that he is and the extreme generosity he's shown myself and my friends repeatedly, and hopes for him receiving all of the good he sends to so many other people 🙏🏼💜

Happy Birthday and thank you for everything, M Shadows 🎊🎉🎂🥳

#personal #m shadows #avenged sevenfold #a7x

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insidekaz · 10 months ago

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It's Been 4 Months...

First off, let me start off with a classic "Howdy everyone." It's me, your favorite enby who's the envy of every man, woman, and other on how I wear my beanie. (I mean, it's less of a beanie and more like an elongated stocking cap, but who's really fact-checking here?) I know that it's been a good four month since I've made any kinds of update here, which I do believe an explanation is in order for such. I'll just give you the quick TLDR:

October:

Started Unemployment

Got laid off, haven't been called back since, so they're probably not going to call me back

Excessively cleaned the apartment

November:

Still unemployed

Fully accepted that I'm not getting called back, expanding job hunting searching to a wider range

Looked into remote jobs I can do from home

Stopped excessively cleaning

December:

FINALLY GOT A JOB AT A HARDWARE STORE

Christmas

Got a new alter, their name being Source (alter #10)

New Year's

Back to work again

This brings us up to speed for January, specifically today being January 30th, where just before 8 this morning I was unceremoniously fired by one of the two managers that work there. I've never wanted to make any of my blog post rant post, nor am I going to start now. What I am going to say, however, that I was fired for what I believe were bullshit grounds, said reasons that were given to me being listed below.

I missed the third day I was suppose to work, reason being that the two days before hand they had me carrying lawnmowers, weed trimmers, and other heavy lawn care equipment up two flights of stairs for eight hours a day. This resulted in my already bad knee getting worse and me needing to purchase a bracer for my knee

What he described as my "general attitude" towards him. When I asked him to clarify on that, he refused to do so, telling me that "he shouldn't have to explain."

Afterwards, I was escorted to the back room to grab my things, given my most recent paycheck by the assistant manager (who was also taken by surprise), and then escorted by the manager out the back door where we take out the trash, door closed swiftly behind me. (I wasn't even given the usual "wish you the best" schtick that other businesses will hit you with.)

Now listen, I don't wanna play the race card, but if I were to list all the minor incidents and slight verbal altercations that happened between the two of us, it would be clearly outlined that said manager did have very glaring negative details of his personality. Honestly, the fact that he waited until after I had changed into my work vest and already made my way to the cashier at the front of the store only to turn me back around and kick me out says a thing or two. He always did like to blatantly waste my time.

So, where does this leave me exactly? Well, as of right now, I'm currently unemployed. I've got about 4 and a half hundred with this paycheck that they gave me, another 6 bands dropping into my account next week, and about 2 hundred in my checking as we speak. I've got enough towards bills and such for a at least a bit. I'm still living with my partner, so not everything is terrible.

Still, I'm not gonna turn into one of those guys that just sits at home and refuses to get a job. My partner is already starting to pull 10+ hours at the factory so that all of our income isn't going straight to bills and other necessities, which I do feel terrible about. They keep telling me that "it isn't my fault", but I can't help but still feel like it is, ya know? They shouldn't have to pull extra hours just so that we can get by. I've already started looking into a new job, applications already starting to be filled out the moment that I got home and sat at my computer. I'm gonna find another job soon, hopefully by the end of this week. I'll try to keep this blog updated with more life changes in the future.

Here's what I've been listening to. As always, don't do anything I wouldn't do. If you do, at least make it cool.

youtube

#insidekaz #kameronkazma #nonbinary #asexual #kaz #unemployment #mini rant #Youtube

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kitashousewife · 2 years ago

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learning new things

an: i thought of kita a lot today so i decided to write this hehe

pairings: timeskip!kita x fem!reader

warnings: husband kita, food mentions, kita is the sweetest ever, lots of pet names, mentions of knives and knife usage, lowercase intentional

kita would do anything for you.

which is why this spring, right after the two of you moved into the farmhouse, he spent weeks researching pumpkins and how to grow them. figuring out the perfect soil. how to space the seeds, how much water and sun they needed, and of course how many to get. he settled on four plants to be safe in case he lost a couple.

now it's october and the two of you are a little overwhelmed.

"74 exactly," kita says, more to himself as enters the house for dinner.

"74 what, shin?" you mumble as you set the final dishes on the table. dusting your hands off on your apron before you take it off, you move quickly to beat your husband to the sink.

"first again," he gloats, grinning ear to ear.

"you were closer to the sink!" you playfully slap his arm. "anyway, what did you count earlier?"

his hand reaches to the towel next to him, picking it up to dry his hands. he watches you wave your wet hands around in an attempt to dry them off. he smirks before using the towel to smack your butt as you walk to your seat.

"shin!"

"74 pumpkins, darlin'," he chuckles, sitting down for dinner. "we are swimming in ‘em out there," he tilts his drinking glass towards the back of the house.

"i can't believe we have that many! i only thought we would get a few. we should sell them out front!"

he shakes his head. "that's kinda silly, ain't it? we don't need any money for 'em."

you hum, moving the food around your plate with your fork. "what do you think we should do with them then? i only wanted a few to decorate the front, maybe a couple to carve, oooh and a couple for baking," you think aloud. kita smiles at your dreaming. one of his favorite things about you is how passionate you are about the little things.

"i could always message my friends. i'm sure they would want some, if that's okay with you."

"of course it is shin. i wouldn't mind at all," you hold his hand in his. with a soft squeeze, kita places a kiss to your knuckles.

"halloween is a couple weeks away, i can't believe it. are you excited?"

he chuckles as he glances at the calendar that hangs in the kitchen. "look at that. and sure! are you excited?"

you give him a puzzled look, which he returns. "do you not like halloween?"

he raises his hands up. "it's not that i don't like it, sweets. i just didn't do a whole lot for it growin' up, 'sall."

the sound of your hands hitting the table grabs his attention immediately. "then it's settled!"

"what's settled?"

"we are gonna do all things halloween so that you can experience it! making up for lost time, or something like that. how does that sound?"

kita can't say no to you.

"it sounds great, baby."

the next evening, before dinner, you walk out to the fields to find you probably very hungry husband. the walk is beautiful. the final hours of sunlight warm up the air, the trees are beautiful and vibrant, and most of the flowers you and kita planted this summer are shedding their final petals. as you step towards the garden, you spot him. hunched over some mounds of potatoes, digging through with his bare hands to grab the best ones.

"you know," you step through the gate and grab the pair of gardening gloves that hang on the fence. "you really should wear these."

kita turns around, absolutely elated. he is so happy to see you, even if it's been only a few minutes. "now why would i do that? my hands work just find, baby."

you look across the garden and let out a quick gasp. he really wasn't kidding about the pumpkins. reading your mind, he stands up with a hum.

"let me grab the wheelbarrow and i'll meetchya over by the pumpkins, pumpkin." he throws you a wink and blush, and blow him a kiss. as soon as you reach the sea of orange at your feet, you begin searching for the best ones.

"so how do we know what would be best, miss halloween expert?" he muses as he arrives at your side. you lift up some of the large leaves to get a better look.

"well, i want a bunch to decorate the front porch with, but i can get those a different day. for carving," you bend down and point to two quite rotund pumpkins resting right next to each other. "these two are great."

"whatever ya think is best, darlin'," kita bends down and with his small pocket knife, cuts the pumpkins free from their vines. after placing both of them in the wheelbarrow, he dusts his hands off on his pants.

"shall we walk back home? everything else is about finished, just need'a grab those potatoes i picked earlier and we can head back,"

you nod, pulling the pumpkins behind you. the two of you walk home in silence, listening to the breeze ruffle the leaves and the gravel crunching under your feet.

"hey, i love ya," kita smiles at you as the two of you reach the house. giving him a soft kiss on the lips, you return his smile.

"i love you too, farmer. come on, let's make some dinner. i'm starving,"

he laughs and pokes your side. "from all that harvesting, i'll bet."

after dinner, the two of you make quick work cleaning up the dishes and counters. while kita finishes drying the last couple plates, you dig through one of your closets for an old tablecloth. you cover the kitchen table with it and smile. the table is kita's granny's table, gifted to you when the two of you got married. you set the pumpkins down and wipe them off.

"shin, will you please grab a couple knives before you leave the kitchen?"

"of course, my love," he calls back. you scroll through your phone, trying to decide on what design to do on yours.

"boo!"

"shin!" you squeal, whipping around to see a very amused kita as he sets the knife on the table. "you scared me!"

"isn't that what halloween is all about? i'm just gettin' ya in the spirit," he laughs. "so, where do we start?"

you can't help but join his laughter. "well, before you came along i was looking at some designs to do for my pumpkin. do you know what you want to do?" he hums and walks behind you, wrapping his arms around you and places his head on your shoulder. he points at a photo on your screen.

"that one," he nods. you tap the photo, making it larger. the photo is a rather large pumpkin with an equally large heart carved out of the front.

"you want to do a heart on yours, shin?" he nods again, walking towards his pumpkin. "yeah, because i love ya so much."

after all this time, his comments and compliments still make you blush. every single time.

"i love you too. now," you grab your pumpkin and with your finger, trace a line around the stem. "we cut the top off and scoop out the insides. then we can start carving," kita raises a brow.

"what do we do with the inside?" you shrug and nod toward the trash bin you brought next to the table. "throw it away, i guess."

"seems like a waste, don'tchya think? i don't wanna waste it if we can use it," he thinks.

"we could always bake the seeds! i used to do that growing up. we would have them as a snack after we finished." kita smiles at that.

"i like that idea much more, my love. now, let's jump in!"

the two of you make quick work of cleaning out your pumpkins, setting the insides on the tablecloth for later. you grab a marker and begin to draw a design on the front of yours. as you draw, kita hums a familiar song to himself. after drawing your design, you grab the knife to start carving.

"a kitty? that's so cute babe," he says from behind his pumpkin. "don't look at mine! i want it to be a surprise!"

"okay shin, i won't look. i may need your help though at some points," too focused on his design, he gives you a thumbs up before continuing his work.

you finish quickly and grab one of the fake candles to place inside. turning it on, you clap as you see your design come to life.

"it looks so good! i can't wait to see how they look outside," you cheer, stepping back so you can snap a quick picture. "almost done, babe?"

kita steps back with the biggest and proudest smile on his face. "just finished! but wait, i don't want ya to see it until we put them outside," he chuckles as he turns you away from his pumpkin.

"fine, fine. i will put mine on the steps," you giggle and carry your pumpkin to the door.

you set it on the step outside and walk back a little to get a better view.

"okay, i'm coming! close yer eyes and i'll tell ya when ya can open," he calls from the doorway. you cover your eyes and hear him shuffle, before he stands at your side. "okay, take a look and tell me what ya think."

on the the other side of the step is kita's pumpkin. he carved a heart, and above it he carved your initials. you gasp.

"shin! it's so perfect. our initials? i love it! you did so great," you squeal. he picks you up and spins you around before carrying back towards the door.

"now everyone that drives by can see how much i love my amazing wife," he beams and pulls you in for a kiss. when you pull away, you give him a kiss on each cheek.

"i think it's perfect," you say over your shoulder as you lead the two of you back inside. kita locks up behind you before walking into the kitchen to fill up the tea kettle.

"what's next up on our halloween to-do list, sweetheart?"

"baking these pumpkin seeds, of course," you start and kita nods. "next, we should pick out our costumes!"

"i think that's a great idea. what do ya wanna dress me up as?"

you laugh. "how about peter pan? i think you would look perfect in some green tights, don't you?" you tease.

kita just laughs and gives you a kiss on the forehead.

"whatever makes ya happy, darlin'."

#kita shinsuke x reader #kita shinsuke fluff #kita shinsuke #kita x reader #kita x reader fluff #kita x you #kita shinsuke x you #hq fluff #hq imagine #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu imagine #kita shinsuke imagine

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lesbianmulcahy · 3 years ago

Note

Father Mulcahy for the character meme!

Thank you so much!! And thanks also to @klingersgender and to the anon for also asking Mulcahy! Sorry this took a moment

Favorite thing about them: augh to choose... I think what makes him stand out so much in my head (and sorry that i'm gonna sound sooo pretentious. but this is THE blorbo from my shows for me) is the way he cares SO MUCH and how much he just wants to be worthy and useful and liked, and how that manifests in that kind of quiet kindness he has. Maybe I just like insecure characters. Also I love that he can be so funny, his humor makes me think of Spock (blorbo from TOS (the original shows), except he tries a little more. But there is that similar kind of deadpan, especially during the later seasons, I think

Least favorite thing about them: I mean the fact that he's out there like voluntarily is :/ yeah. I'm sorry that's such a boring answer but like. he definitely has his faults but I think they are funny so I like them actually

Favorite line: I love "Well, I'm very good at keeping secrets. There are some things I won't even tell myself". Also I am still obsessed with "My parents wished that I had been a girl, hence my name Francis". Fucked up that he said that actually, I haven't known peace since

BROTP: Oh... I do love his relationship with Klinger, I think they have such a fun dynamic,and it goes pretty much all through the series too. Like espevially during the early season they just vibe so hard. ALSO Sarah from Aftermash. They are SUCH a fun couple I'm sorry to talk about Aftermash so much but Sarah my BELOVED and she and Mulcahy are just. fucking insane

OTP: I'm going to refer you all to this post. I simply think he and Sidney had a wild relationship spanning from 1943 through the war and then when they meet again in 1954. It happens I know it cause they told me <3 But also you can talk me into thinking any ship is good and fun. I do like him and Hawkeye too

NOTP: I don't think I have any grounds to like.. actively judge anyone's ships, looking at mine. I guess I'm not a fan if pairing him with women

Random headcanon: I think he and Klinger share the brown cardigan since we see both of them wear it! Oh also maybe more inch resting, I think he started trying to learn the names of some of the surgical instruments after Carry On Hawkeye! I want him to go into nursing school actually

Unpopular opinion: I don't think that I've seen enough popular opinions about him to have any unpopular ones. Is it unpopular that I think that he doesn't have any kind of inner turmoil about queerness. His guilt and inferiority complex come from different things

Song I associate with them: Accidentally started associating him with Syksyn Sävel by Juice Leskinen, especially the part that goes like "Take me into your dreams, even if I board other trains / it's october and you can see it on me / When I get close to you, even the gods believe in me / Although I always don't myself". A less embarrassing answer would probably be Laughing With by Regina Spektor

Favorite picture of them:

Here are some!! Tbh I could pic any images and like. Those would be my favorite. I simply like his shape :)

Thank you one more time for asking!!!

#sorry that this is barely coherent #hes just such a character of all time for me #how do i make it so this wont show up in the main tags... is it still that tumblr wont show past the 5th tag?#ask

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j-ut-da-e · 2 years ago

Text

Bitter Taste

2. Big Happy Family - Part 1

Summary - BD Han was born on October 1st, 1989. They were just a nurse refusing to use their full powers before they became best friends with Klaus Hargreeves. After driving him to his father’s funeral, their life capsizes when they meet the rest of the Hargreeves family.

Pairing - Klaus Hargreeves x NB!OC

Word Count - 2916

Warnings - heavy swearing, talk of and actual drug use, withdrawal symptoms, self-harm, Klaus being an idiot

A/N - the scene where Klaus is pretending to be Five's dad is my favorite scene in the entire show, ty. lmk if I missed any warnings <3

Masterlist

Sun didn't greet me when I awoke the next morning. Only a cold bed and hair on my face. I rub my eyes and sit up slowly. The pants I wore yesterday were discarded on my floor, I didn't have the energy to put on actual pajamas.

A loud crash startles me, making my heart almost leap from my chest. I shoot a glare at my still locked door. Surprising, given Klaus's track record I had figured he would've broken in and slipped into bed with me. That's what he'd done every time before anyway.

I twist my hair around itself and clip it in place, my arm already sore from the small task. Reaching under my pillow, I feel nothing. I look over at the floor and see the pills all over my floor. Right.

Sighing, I heave myself out of bed and to the door. The smell of…something floods my nose as I open it. I went to the bathroom first, wanting to postpone seeing the man that drove me crazy even for a minute.

Jesus H. Christ. The scene in the kitchen is- to say the least, a war zone. Pots and pans are strewn about my counters, all dirty with various foods. Was he just starting things and then abandoning them?

Speaking of the devil, Klaus stood at the stove, stirring something in a pot of water. He was only wearing rainbow, leopard print underwear, something he seemed to be making a habit of in my apartment. My eyes absentmindedly trail up his body. He's almost rail thin now, he's always been skinny since we met, but in the last 6 months, he seemed to have lost even more weight.

"BD," he whines, "if you keep staring at my ass like that I'm gonna blush."

He bats his eyelashes at me and I roll my eyes, "What the hell are you doing to my kitchen? And God, what time is it?"

"Oh, I have no idea what time it is. And maybe I was feeling bad about that little spat we had last night," he ponders, waving his hands. A glint on his wrist takes my attention and I remember looking at a sobriety chip yesterday morning, "So I thought I would make us some breakfast, but I kept starting things, deciding I didn't want it, again and again, blah blah blah. Then I started boiling eggs-"

"Klaus," I interject, "you were in rehab, I'm not mad at you for being gone. But-"

"No, no, no. No, but," he says, coming over and putting his hands on my arms, "you said we're done being mad at Klaus, right?"

"I just know you put me down as your spouse so I just don't understand why they didn't call me…" I look down and put my hand over his, trailing down to pick at his rehab wristband.

"Maybe I just didn't want to lie on my forms anymore," he grins widely at me, but it doesn't reach his eyes.

Sighing, I pull him close. He wraps an arm around my waist and his other hand plays with pieces of my hair that fell out of the clip. "I did miss you, BD. And I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry for calling you an unpredictable junkie…I guess," we both laugh, pulling apart. "And you're so skinny," I say, patting his stomach, "I'll make congee for breakfast, okay?"

His eyes sparkle as he places a kiss on my cheek. I swat him away and he runs to the couch, giggling.

"You're cleaning up this kitchen by the way!" I call to him, he waves his hand and lights a cigarette, sitting next to an already open window.

It was five in the morning when I finished breakfast and Klaus and I sat down to eat. He burns his mouth trying to shovel in the food, exaggeratingly fanning his face. I laugh at his antics and mix my eggs into the porridge.

"We need to go back to the Academy today, by the way."

"Why?" I ask, quirking up an eyebrow, "Also how? You made me leave my car there, remember?"

"Oh, I went and got that earlier this morning," annoyance flashes across his face and he gives my wall the side eye, grumbling.

"Is he back?" He just nods his head once, "Hi, Ben, nice to have you back. "

Klaus rolls his eyes, "He says hello," he mumbles with his mouth full.

"I'll change when we're done and we can head over there. But you are not pulling that key snatching shit again."

☂

Tattered sweatshirt and baggy jeans now on, I head down to my car where Klaus is already waiting. I climb in and my face immediately scrunches. The air was choking me, it smelled like someone had smoked in there for 5 years and then sunk it in a lake.

"You know, I really appreciate you getting the car, but it smells like a damn ashtray in here," I say, rolling down all the windows and holding my sweatshirt to my nose.

He laughs nervously, "Oh, you know me- shut it, Ben!"

"Actually, tell Ben to become corporal and tell what the hell you did here. You've never even smelled this bad." Klaus turns around and scowls at the back seat, throwing a bottle of hand sanitizer back there.

Waves of nausea started washing over me about halfway to the Academy. When we arrived, I didn't even turn the engine off before opening my door and vomiting onto the sidewalk. Klaus grows silent beside me before climbing over into my seat and rubbing my back.

“Holy shit, babe,” I could feel a cold sweat forming all over my body, “Is it hitting you that hard?”

“It feels like someone is trying to slide their hands under my skin…”

“Yeah… yeah, just uh- just let it out. It'll be out of your system soon then we can go back to regularly scheduled programming.”

God this is so much worse than last time… Why isn't he going through withdrawal?

I reach over and turn off the engine, accidentally elbowing the idiot sitting in my seat with me. I carefully slide out, avoiding the new puddle I made. Klaus follows and puts his arm around my shoulders.

"Can you show me where a bathroom is in this place, I need to splash my face or… rip my skin off, one of those," I wipe my face with my sleeve and he pats my arm.

"Yeah, of course. But if you rip your skin off I really don't wanna see that, so can you like, leave your keys outside the door?" My eyes shoot daggers at him, "No? Okay."

Cold water only exacerbated my cold chills. After rinsing my mouth, I exit the bathroom and head toward the living room. Klaus said he would be there.

"Christ on a cracker!" I heard from across the foyer.

When I reach the open double doors I can hear Pogo speaking with him, "My apologies, Master Klaus. I have a query for you."

I press my back against the wall, "Oh?" He obviously had a cigarette in his mouth.

"Items from your father's office have gone missing." He starts, I can hear his cane on the ground as he moves towards him, "In particular, an ornate box with a pearl inlay."

"Really? You don't say?" Guilty.

"Any idea where it went?"

There's a pause before Klaus speaks again, "No, no, no. No idea. Sorry." Liar. "Drop dead." I hear him say under his breath.

"Would you shut up!"

"Excuse me?" Pogo asks indignantly.

"Pogo, I didn't mean you, I just... I…" he stumbles, "You know, there's been a lot of stuff I've been dealing with. Just a lot of memories coming up. All those good times. Well, not so much good times as really awful, terrible, depressing times."

Pogo sighs, "The contents of that box are…priceless. Were they to find their way back to the office, whoever took it would be absolved of any blame or consequences."

"Oh well, lucky bastard."

I walk away from the wall as Pogo leaves so it looks like I'm just walking up, "M- BD. Lovely to see you again."

"You too, Pogo…" I sigh as I reach the doors again.

Of course, he wasn't going through withdrawal. He's still high. Why was I stupid enough to think- forget it.

Klaus is standing next to one of the couches, smoking as I thought, his eyes widen when he sees me, "Hey, you feeling better, babe? I see all your skin is intact so that's good, right?" He asks, rubbing my arms.

I just nod, "Hey, can I just lay down here for a while, I don't think I should drive."

"Yeah, sure. Let's go up to casa Klaus."

Considering the mansion's size, Klaus's room is smaller than I thought it'd be. It was hazy. The walls were covered in string lights and posters, bands, abstract art, concerts. A desk is pushed up against the wall, covered in trinkets, and a shelf in the back corner of the room has a record player, cd player, and stacks of CDs. A small table sits by the bed with various kinds of drug paraphernalia, which he had promptly shoved off and under his bed.

His bed was small, pushed up against a window. The room was frozen in time from when he left home. "Home", would he call it that? This stuffy, oppressing Academy, would it be a home to anyone?

Facing the wall, I notice writing on the wall. Marker, pencil, crayon, all in Klaus’s handwriting. I trace my finger over the lines.

“It makes me feel like dark & small”

“Well I settled on “lamplight”(the first light in which I learned to see the divinity looking out the bedroom window)”

“Where the fire burns so do I. feel the pain ELECTRIFY ME. you cannot kill the willing to die.”

“Is this what they say to you?” I ask, feeling him lay down next to me. It's cramped, I can feel the heat radiating off of him.

I hear the click of his lighter, “Yeah, bullshit, huh?” he laughs dryly.

“It doesn't make much sense, no. But it is kinda beautiful,” I turn over, “I think the dead are luckier than us…”

“Ben doesn't agree.”

“I just think- is that my crop top?” I prop myself up on my elbow.

“Yeah, you like it?”

“Yes, I like it! I bought it, you-” I grab the shirt, “You know what, give it back. I never have anything to wear besides scrubs because of you!”

I start trying to pull the shirt over his head and he starts laughing hysterically, dropping his cigarette, “BD, if you want me naked so bad, all you have to do is ask,” he screams as I pull him up.

“Asshole,” I bite back a smile.

“Pervert!”

Klaus squeals and I yell at him as I continue trying to take my shirt back. I wasn't really mad at him, not about the clothes anyway. It was just something to take my mind off death for a while. We wrestle and I get the shirt halfway over his head, his arms up. A whooshing sound makes us stop dead and snap our heads to the door.

Five stands there in the Umbrella Academy uniform, hands in his pockets and an eyebrow cocked, "Well. Sorry to interrupt your….canoodling, but I need you two to do something for me."

☂

Five explained that he needed Klaus and me to pretend to be his parents. After I properly introduced myself, of course. The boy said he would give us twenty dollars each if we did that and didn't ask questions. We just had to go to a prosthetics company and convince some doctor to give Five the information he wanted. Easy enough.

The three of us were on the stairwell now, Klaus in a blue floral, frilly button-up, “I thought I told you two to put on something professional,” Five snaps.

“What? This is my nicest outfit.”

I look down at myself, “What? Jeans with butterflies on them aren’t professional?”

He sighs, “We’ll raid the old man’s closet,” he looks me up and down, “And Grace’s.”

“As long as I get paid- I mean as long as we get paid,” Klaus says, hugging me.

“When the job is done.”

“Okay, but just we’re clear on the finer details, we just gotta go into this place and pretend to be your dear old parents, right?”

“Something like that…”

“What’s our cover story?”

Five shakes his head, “What? What are you talking about?”

Klaus waves his hands around, “I mean, were we really young when we had you?”

“Like 16?” I continue.

“Like young and…terribly misguided?” he asks, his eyes shining.

“Sure.”

“Your mother, BD,” he looks at me dramatically, “you slut!” I punch his arm, hard, “We met at…the disco, remember that. Oh my god, the sex was ah-mazing…” he says, dragging out the syllables.

“Oh!” I rub my stomach, “And we’re expecting a little sister, Six,” I laugh and Klaus rubs my stomach as well, looking down mock-lovingly.

Five just looks at us in disgust, “What a disturbing glimpse into that thing you call a brain.” he sighs, starting down the stairs.

“Don't make me put you in timeout!”

The prosthetics company was downtown, not far from the Academy. Five made Klaus wear one of Reginald’s black, pin-striped suits. I wore a simple dress with my sweatshirt stuffed up it. I started getting the shakes when we made it into the building, the lights gave me a headache.

The three of us sat in a large office with glass on almost every wall. A man, the doctor Five talked with earlier sat behind a large desk in the middle of the room. Klaus and I were in two armchairs flanking him with Five standing in the middle of us.

“Like I said to your son earlier, any information about the prosthetics we build is strictly confidential. Without the client's consent, I simply can't help you.” the doctor says.

Five takes a step forward, “Well, we can't get consent if you don't give us a name.”

“Well, that’s not my problem,” he looks over at me.

Klaus stands, “And what about my consent?”

“Excuse me?”

“Who gave you permission…” he starts to cry, pretty convincingly, “To lay your hands on my son?”

I look up at the lights, trying to summon my own tears, “What?”

“You heard me.”

“I didn't touch your son.”

“Well, then how did he get that swollen lip, then?” he asks, cocking his head to the side. The realization of his plan hits me, but not in time to prepare.

“He doesn't have a swollen-”

Klaus rears back and slaps Five across the face. The force snaps his head to the side and I can already see blood forming at the corner of his mouth. I slap my hand over my mouth to stifle a laugh… or a scream, I’m not sure which.

My deranged “husband” walks back up to the desk, placing his hands on its surface, “I want it. Name, please. Now.”

“You’re crazy…” he squeaks out, now sweating.

Klaus laughs darkly, “You got no idea.”

The doctor's eyes snap back to me, “Ma’am, are you okay?”

I feel a bead of sweat drip down my forehead as a hot flash washes over me, “Actually, sir, I went into active labor this morning, but when my son,” I get up to stand next to Klaus, “when my son told me what you did, I marched my ass down here. So if you don't give us what we need I will make your big, shiny office a biohazard zone.”

Now, the man is frightened, looking between us. Taking up the snowglobe sitting on the desk, Klaus grins widely, "'Peace on Earth', that's so sweet," but not even a second later he smashes it into his forehead, the liquid spilling all over me. Glitter sticks to his hair and he looks back up, groaning and now bleeding from his scalp, “God, that hurt!”

“I’m calling security-” he says, reaching for the phone, I lunge over his desk and hit him with it before putting it to Klaus’s ear, “What are you doing?”

He turns on the fake tears again and chokes himself up, “There's been an assault...in Mr. Big's office, and we need security, now. Schnell!” he slams the phone down on the receiver and smiles.

“Now, here’s what’s gonna happen, Grant,” I whisper, spreading my hands out over the desk.

“It- It’s Lance…”

“In about 60 seconds, two security guards are gonna burst through that door,

and they're gonna see a whole lot of blood, a pregnant woman, and a child with a bloody lip, and they're gonna wonder, "What the hell happened?"”

“And we’re gonna tell them…” Klaus sobs dramatically, “that you beat the shit out of us!” he straightens and stops the tears, “You're gonna do great in prison, Grant. Trust me, I've been there. Little piece of chicken like you. Oh, my God, you're gonna get passed around like a… You're just... You're gonna do great. That's all I'm saying.”

“Listen, Lance. I’ve been there too and there is a way to get out of that little scenario…” I say, batting my eyelashes.

“Jesus, you’re a real sick bastard…”

“Thank you,” we say together, Klaus spitting out a piece of glass.

#klaus #klaus x oc #the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves #five hargreeves #fanfiction #tua #original characters #ben hargreeves #diego hargreeves #luther hargreeves #umbrella academy #fanfic #tua s1 #tua rewrite #nonbinary

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tokugou · 3 years ago

Note

do you have your favourite tdbk fanfics? (share pls i'm out of things to readdd) ♡

Finn!!! I gonna try my best to share something and hope you gonna like at least one of them. Also I didn't have time to read anything for a past month (?) so I am not very up to date with new ones.

okokok I need to share this one first because it was written for me (well i requested it but it still counts!!)

the right kind of home by @dabibones

“comfort food”

I will start with on-going I really liked so far (I need to catch up with them too)

love lies bleeding by twopinchesofcinnamon - the best setting I could ever ask for - Zombie Apocalypse AU

“We could. Y’know,” Red-eyes sucks his teeth hard, as if his own words physically pain him. “Compromise.” Shouto lets himself slip down the railing until he’s propped against it. “What do you propose?” “Easy,” he zeroes in, contemplating, and Shouto can’t quite decipher him anymore. “Split the food and go our separate ways. We never need to speak again. Deal?” Shouto tips his chin up at the clouds. He blows out a breath, counting to seven. “Can I get two thirds?” Or: a loner, a wanderer, and flowers that glow in the dark.

20:04 by redonthemoon - it is finished already but I still didn't finish it

He’s now lying on his floor, naked, listening on repeat to the same song trying to come up with an idea of what he is supposed to do. He has watched all the movies that are out there about the topic. He has even taken the car and drove as far as he could. He has even taken a plane to another country and landed there but the second the clock hit midnight, he woke up on his bed, alarm pounding and the same date: Friday, October 28th. He can’t do it anymore. He can’t repeat the same day over and over.

let's ignore my 200 tabs opened on my phone - to read later - cos I am lazy, so I went through my bookmarks to pick the ones I think are good (and not embarassing to share) - under read more because yeah there is a few

better late than never

Bakugou and todoroki get hit by a body swap quirk, and physical contact seems to be the only answer to their predicament

My Hero Love Story

After the two of them are spotted at a Valentine's Day hero convention while on a mission, Shouto gets the brilliant (and extremely bad) idea to pretend he and Bakugou are there on a date together. It's brilliant because it's the perfect cover story. It's bad because he's desperately in love with Bakugou, and Bakugou has no idea.

Whatever It Takes

That one where Bakugou agrees to pretend to date Todoroki just to piss off Endeavor, and ends up falling in love instead.

Bam Went My Heart

Bakugou Katsuki is 100% not on a date with Todoroki Shouto

A fishy deal

Bakugou Katsuki, a rebel spy, attends an auction and leaves with more than just intel.

better than myth

Amidst domestic disasters, the infernal water bill and the armchair in the shower, there was a comfortable rapport between them. Bakugou was falling disgustingly in love with it.

The Energy Between Us Blossoms Colors In My Heart

Todoroki Shouto has always been a bit curious about his punk roommate with red hair tips, but he never had the opportunity to get to know him better. That's until they get assigned as partners for their university projects.

Teenage Rebellion

Shouto dye his hair

Can I Get A Name For Your Order?

Coffee Shop AU

i like you so much (what do i do?)

Katsuki is really good at what he does, except when Shouto's there. another coffee shop au

i wanna ruin our friendship

Todoroki and Bakugou make out, become friends, and fall in love, all in that order.

You Set My Soul Alight

When enrolling into college, Shouto thought he’ll be freed from under his father’s thumb, but that’s not true. Never was true. Even here his father is controlling his life. To be more specific, his dating life out of all things. After witnessing his roommate, Bakugou, arguing on the phone with his mother about significant others, Shouto gets an idea. They form a compromise. Shouto is tired of his father orchestrating dates for him and Bakugou wants his mother to leave him alone. Nothing could go wrong.

Sweeter than Victory

In which Katsuki sets out to slay a chimera, ends up hunting down an elusive, mystical flower, and encounters a nymph known for being beautiful and unattainable. He really needs to have a damn talk with the Fates. Or Aphrodite. Because seriously, what kind of bullshit quest is this?

Sorry (Not Sorry) For The Distraction

Bakugou Katsuki may have made a mistake. Not that he'd call it that, of course, but he probably should've thought more about what he chose to wear when he allowed Todoroki into his home to work on their shared case.

He just hadn't exactly anticipated that Todoroki would notice his piercings. Or more importantly, not shut the fuck up about them.

hope you think of me high, hope you think of me highly

Shotgunning

Raising the Steaks

Inasa serves dishes, Bakugou serves food, Camie serves customers and Shouto serves looks.

threadache

Todoroki asks Bakugou to make his outfit for the Met Gala - nothing is what it seams.

love you sideways

Katsuki is the undisputed King of the arcade until some asshole comes in and starts beating all his high scores.

Synergy

Katsuki, a top pro gamer, encounters a worthy and very irritating rival—who may also be about to become his teammate.

Bloom

In recent years, it's been assumed that the appearance of soul bonds has disappeared. Katsuki, a cocky pro hero, and Shouto, the barista at Katsuki's favorite coffee shop, are about to discover that's not quite true.

Upon My Back

the soulmate au where every time your soulmate cries a flower tattoo appears on your skin

Vampirism wasn't in the roommate contract

“You’re a vampire?!” “And you’re a werewolf. You don’t see me complaining even though-“ Todoroki’s nose scrunched, and Bakugou could feel the vein in his head about to pop. “If you say I smell, I’m going to kick you out right now, dead blood.”

The best kept secrets aren't secrets at all

In which, Todoroki dates the edgy chemical engineering student who keeps stealing his friends parking spaces and is only just learning how to get along with others.

i want you (to want me)

invisibilia (or voyeur, of the unwilling kind)

Hagakure Tooru is invisible, and that is sometimes a lot more trouble than it's worth.

Just One Bite

This particular fuckup begins when he saves a cat from a demon in a sketchy alley.

How To Lose A Costume Contest But Still Win At Life

Bakugou Katsuki was determined to win a costume competition with the most realistic werewolf costume he could feasibly put together.

Without Hesitation

The first time Bakugou told Todoroki he was in love with him, he thought he’d die.

did i say a few? i overdid it I AM SORRY but i do hope you gonna like/read a few of these, I liked them. Also thank you so so so much for the ask! It made me so happy no one ever ask about my favorite things it was such a nice thing to do!

#chloe.mailbox #fi-nn #mutsy!#that took longer than i expected orz #also i probably missed the good ones #but i hope you can find something nice for you here #otp: fire meet gasoline #dont forget to talk to me about my babies!!#anything!!#hcs or ideas #talk my babies to me

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toomanyfandoms02 · 5 years ago

Text

Halloween // Matthew Gray Gubler x Reader

Another Story based on a gif/picture! (Hope this is kinda what you were thinking @aberrant-annie )

Summary - It's the first year that y/n and Matthew are a couple, and he insists that they have a couples costume for an upcoming party.

Word count - 2.5k

Gif courtesy of @nationgubler

It was that time of year again. The time where Matthew got impossibly excited, wore tremendously weird costumes, and snuck up behind me an ungodly amount of times.

Halloween.

Now you may be thinking, 'Halloween is a fun and *normal* time of year for many families!' But you only think that because you haven't met my boyfriend Matthew.

Now let's give a little background on the weirdo that is my best friend.

Matthew Gray Gubler is an actor, author, filmmaker, illustrator, fashion model, and painter. But what they don't put on his google search profile is that, before all, he is a Halloween Enthusiast.

He and I have been best friends for over 8 years, and every single one of those years he has effortlessly dragged me into any kind of spooky shenanigan that he could. This was the first year of the 8 that we are a couple, so he decided, in a fit of glory as he put it, that we *needed* a couple's costume this year for the Criminal Minds cast Halloween party. I was 100% down for this idea, but boy, I really didn't know what I was getting myself into by agreeing to it so easily. So let's go back to where this whole ordeal began.

The day was October 15th, and I was sitting blindfolded in the passengers seat of Matthew's car.

"Where the hell are we going?" I giggled, flailing my arms around the car, blindly looking for the trail mix I left in his car the day before. He grabbed my wrist, leading it down to the cupholder and putting my hand on the bag. He knew me too well.

"It's a surprise, obviously, just know it has to do with Halloween." He grabbed my hand and placed a gentle kiss to the top of it.

"Doesn't everything have to do with Halloween with you?"

"Maybe." He laughed.

We were in the car for around 15 minutes, all the while I jammed out to a mix of songs I loved and goofy Halloween themed songs. Matthew had made a playlist of the two as a compromise.

I heard the car click into park and listened as Matthew left the car and walked to my side, opening the door and leading me out.

"When will I be able to see again? This whole blind thing is not for me." He laughed at my remark, looping his arm through mine so he could lead me to what I could only assume was my death. That's when I heard it, the all too familiar laugh of a clown.

Here we go.

Without the notice of my lovely boyfriend I whipped my hand up to my head, removing the black cloth that covered my eyes, I only heard a squeak of protest from him before I saw 'The Haunted Jail' before me.

"Of course." I rolled my eyes in a playful manner, unhooking myself from his arm. "So, why are we here."

"Well, I was thinking that maybe we could get some couple costume ideas from here. It's the jails doubles night so two workers tag team on a costume." He gestured wildly with his hands towards the sign that read *Doubles night! Couples get a 15% discount tonight*. I shook my head in amusement.

"Alright, let's go."

After walking through the 3 story building, we came out with a nice list of ideas for scary couples costumes. This consisted of :

•Beetlejuice

•Pupetmaster and puppet

•Purge

•Wedding gone wrong

•Twisted Alice and Mad Hatter

Then we just had to come to a decision, and soon.

We then sat in the car on our way home to dig out more decorations from the attic. Our house from the inside looked like someone had gotten murdered. There were giant floor and window stickers that resembled blood, fake knives everywhere, and caution tape. This all paired with the tape in the shape of a body on the ground near our fridge. But Matthew had so graciously pointed out that we needed to decorate the outside like we were a haunted house.

He was currently up in our creepy ass attic as I stood with crossed arms at the end of the rickety ladder that led up there. He popped his head out of the little square hole, wearing a jason mask. I narrowed my eyes and shook my head with the smallest smile.

"I'm gonna hand some boxes down to you." I heard him say behind the muffling mask.

The first box held large organized strings of orange LEDs and hooks to set them up on. The next box was filled with fake webs and the next was a huge box. I set it on the ground, prying it open to reveal giant spiders with tacky red eyes and long fangs.

"Are we gonna have these bad boys climbing the ivy outside?" He popped from the attic in a new, mask. A werewolf one I assumed.

"Yep!" He lightly set another box in my hands. "I hate the smell of these masks," He ripped the mask off, revealing his unruly hair and squinting eyes from the new amount of light. "why do I keep buying them?" It made my heart melt, messy hair Gubler was my favorite Gubler.

We dragged all of the boxes outside and decorated for what seemed like 6 hours, it was way harder work than what you would expect. We ended up with 2 giant spiders hung on the ivy, 1 crawling up the porch, and 2 more on the roof. The webs we had were strung everywhere, but the 'main web', as Matthew called it, was across the porch. We had LEDs lighting up most of the outside of our house, it made it look like a constant sunset, or constantly living in a horror movie. Whatever floats your boat. And lastly, we had bloody tomb stones scattered in the yard with fake hands reaching up at the sky through the ground.

Then it was October 16th. I had woken up groggily, feeling the bed beside me for Matthew, but only touching the soft white sheets. The time was 9:47 am and the sun was bleeding through the curtains. My legs hung over the bed as my limbs stretched, pulling down a shirt that was much to large for me *probably because it wasn't mine*. As soon as I stepped out of my bedroom I was met with a scream mask.

"**Morning!**" This made me scream.

"Damnit Matthew Gray! Christ, will the scaring ever end?" I say this but of course, it was really one of my favorite things about him.

"Not until Christmas." He replied with a cocky smile, kissing me softly. I grabbed the back of his neck, deepening the kiss and trying to make him take the hint. He pulled away swiftly. "I would *love* to continue doing this." He ran his hands down my arms and to my hips. "But I made you breakfast and eggs are better warm." He squeezed my hip and gently pushed me toward the kitchen.

Over breakfast we discussed what we were going to go as for the party. We came to the conclusion that doing purge killers would be the most fun. Now all we had to do was get the costumes.

So we left around 1 for Party City. The place had a surprisingly small amount of people, considering the time of year. However there was one girl in there that kept sneaking looks at Matthew. She was standing near some children's costumes. I quickly found out why when a kid came running up with an Alice and Wonderland costume. Shaking it profusely at her mom. The woman kneeled down to her size and gestured towards Matthew. I scrunched my face up.

*What was she telling her?*

Matthew had kept walking and I swiftly caught up with him in the mask aisle. As soon as I got there, the small girl I had just saw was tugging at his orange pumpkin T-Shirt.

"Hi! My mommy said she's a big fan of you on crimimal minds." I giggled a bit. She waved him down to her level, and he gladly came down to listen. "I think she might have a crush on you." I could hear her whisper. He looked back at me expectantly, I just smiled with a shrug. I wasn't much of the jealous type, Matthew was *extremely* loyal, I trusted him with my life. I shooed him towards the woman. He stood and waved at her, gesturing her over and backing up to be by me. I was trying to be inconspicuous and look at the masks. But clearly my lovely boyfriend had a different idea.

"Hi! What's your name?" He asked with a famous million dollar grin.

"A-ashley." She stood for a second, silently staring at him. "I'm sorry, I obviously didn't expect to be seeing you. I'm a just huge fan of yours. And it doesn't help that you are way cuter in person." She smiled shyly, hugging her daughter to her side. Matthew smiled politely but quickly snaked his arm around my hip. I turned to her with the kindest smile I could. I could see realization dropping from her eyes to the red tips of her ears.

"Well you obviously know I'm Matthew. This is my girlfriend, y/n." I leaned into him slightly. Me and Matthew hadn't exactly gone *public*. So it was an honest mistake that she wouldn't know we were together. But to be fair, we weren't hiding it either. "Would you like a picture by the way?" That seemed to distract her enough to knock her out of her clearly petrified trance.

"Yes! A million times yes!"

"I'll take it for you." I grabbed the phone she held out with a slightly tense smile. We took a few pictures and said our goodbyes as she checked out an left. We got back to looking at masks.

"Did you see her face when I grabbed your hips? I kinda live for that look." I smacked his arm playfully.

"The poor girl, she just flirted with you in front if your *girlfriend*. You petrified her!"

"Well I think you just made her a little jealous." He came behind me, wrapping his arms around my stomach and kissing my shoulders.

"Ok Gubler," I slipped from his grip. "we are in public." He groaned a little and followed me down the aisle. I grabbed the cool LED masks with the X's for eyes and big smiles, the typical Purge ones. I got me a purple one and him a red one. Next stop was fake weapons.

I gazed at all of the weapons on the wall. Machetes, guns, bats, nunchucks, knives, all of it. I then looked over to see my boyfriend squinting and tapping his chin in fake contemplation.

"Oh just grab the knife, I know that's what you wanna get." He whipped it off the wall and gave me a serious look, pointing the sharp styrofoam at me. He tapped it to my nose and couldn't contain his laugh as I looked him in the eyes with the biggest smile I could muster.

"You really know how to break me out of character."

So he did end up buying the styrofoam knife, and I ended up buying a plastic machete. As we left the store, the masks and weapons in hand he nudged me.

"So have you thought of what we are gonna wear?"

"Oh yeah. I already have the outfit, you're gonna love it, mine at least. We still have some spare fake blood at home right?" He narrowed his eyes at me, nodding suspiciously. "Great, then I just have to decorate the shirts." Which is exactly what I did when we got home.

I laid our two white button up's on our asphalt driveway, splattering them with blood. Matthew watched me. Sitting a lawn chair as I covered my hands in the blood and put a few handprints on random parts.

"Can I see the whole outfit you have planned now?" He whined.

"Nope, you have to wait. It's not that far away."

But he had asked me to show him everyday up until today, October 31st, party day. Now here we are, on our way back from a McDonalds run that took a *bit* longer than anticipated and we had a very slight chance of being late. We stumbled into the house and ran to the room.

"Why are we rushing anyway?" I took a pause, catching my breath. "We don't have to be exactly on time anyway." He agreed and we slowed down a bit to get our things together.

"I didn't want to have to rush out after seeing you in costume anyway." He said, slyly reaching into the closet and grabbing our button up's. I grabbed the rest of my things from a plastic bag under my side of the bed. I went to the bathroom and changed. My outfit consisted of a black miniskirt, a black cropped tube top, and black knee high socks. Paired with black heeled low-top booties. Then slung over it all was ny open button up. I sheathed my machete behind me and walked out of the bathroom to see Matthew in his bloody shirt and old dress pants and shoes. His giant knife was sheathed in a holster on his side. He ogled at me for a moment, shifting on his feet.

"Holy- wow." He breathed out. I waltzed up to him, unbuttoning a few more buttons and messing his hair to fit the part a bit more. I handed him his mask, with my eyebrows raised. He set it on the bed behind him, cupping my face and bringing me in for a kiss. I ran my hands down his half bare chest and I could feel him smile into the kiss, so I did too, and boy was he a sucker for that. He deepened the kiss and pull me towards him as much as he could, leading his hands lower and lower. Eventually he grabbed my butt a little and I let a giggle slip into the kiss. I parted from him, staring into those honey brown eyes. I felt like a teenager. He had not taken his eyes off me since I left the bathroom.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer."

"Alright." He slid he phone from his pocket, snapping a picture of me. What was I gonna do with this man? I grabbed our masks and we headed out.

We were only about 20 minutes late to the party. We turned our LEDs on and entered AJs house, as her door was wide open.

"You guys look *amazing*!" Kirsten gushed. "Especially you y/n. *Damn* do you rock those socks."

"I know right?" He lifted his mask, placing a kiss on my cheek.

The whole night was filled with chugging fun Halloween themed drinks, compliments on our costumes, slipping secret kisses, and quite the photo shoot.

*And man was I in for it when I got home.*

-----------------------

@spenciereiddd said they wanted tagged in some writing, so here ya go my dude.

#mgg #criminal minds #matthew gray gubler x reader #matthew gray gubler #matthewgraygubler #spencer reid

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fckaugust · 4 years ago

Note

actually ✍ ( ignore the other one, i'm indecisive )

✍: for what my muse has written about yours in their diary.

disclaimer: this is all hypothetical, of course ! also, all spelling errors he inevitably would’ve made have been corrected with the exception of jake gyllenhaal’s name.

november 17th, 2010:

today that nice guy mx took me to meet a couple people he’s friends with. they were all pretty cool i guess, but it was kinda weird because apparently a lot of them knew i ‘replaced’ this guy named eddie. maybe i’ll try to meet him. anyway, one of them was named syrelle (i think) and i think she was my favorite. she was really nice and honestly very pretty too!

november 18th, 2010:

update: it’s spelled cyrelle. with a c.

november 22nd, 2010:

cyrelle learned i was born (and partially bred, you know my story! you’re me!) in west virginia and had me watch this movie called ‘october sky.’ she was talking the whole time so i don’t really know what it was about, but that’s okay. i think i liked that better than just the general concept of watching a movie in the first place. she’s really smart. like... really smart. i also didn’t really know what she was talking about because she’s so smart, but i still liked it a whole lot. she gave me a copy of the dvd. i looked it up to see if it seemed like i should watch it without cyrelle. apparently it’s a combo of our worlds, if you will: west virginia and space. and jake gylenhal jake gyllinhall jake gillenhall jake gyllenhall (sp?).

january 4th, 2011:

so apparently cyrelle’s mom’s some kind of famous actress? i don’t know. there seems to be a lot of weird judgment going on about her family which... i don’t get? everyone has weird family things going on. unless she’s part of the manson family (and i don’t think they were actually related or really a family... right? also wasn’t that in the 60s? rip sharon tate), WHO CARES ABOUT LOCAL DRAMA?!?!?!

july 18th, 2013:

so ‘the conjuring’ is coming out tomorrow. i think i might try to actually ask cyrelle to hang out - like, go to the movies with me, that kind of hang out. the one you see in movies.

july 21st, 2013:

ignore july 18th, re cyrelle. i didn’t send the text and i don’t think i will. i’m gonna be that guy who says he’s in the ‘friendzone,’ ew. i hope someone punches me if i ever say that or call myself a ‘nice guy’. or wear a fedora. so anyway, [ stuff about other people ].

september 20th, 2014:

i was so worried cyrelle and [insert various other names] were in there. i hate that i was thinking about all of them and i still couldn’t just... go in. i was so close. and now nina’s dead because i’m a damn coward. and george is dead because i didn’t do a damn thing even though i was so fucking close to it. all it took were five goddamn steps. and i just kept thinking... you selfish idiot. if you go in, you’re a selfish idiot because you just wanna be a big damn hero. if you stay here, you’re a selfish idiot because you’ll let your friends burn to a crisp. i’m really glad cyrelle and [the other names] weren’t there. rachel was though, and now she might be blind. we’re not close enough for me to know all the details yet, but i know it’s not... good. and jesse’s face is all disfigured which is unfair because he actually saved people. at least i finally have proof that karma doesn’t exist.

november 28th, 2014:

i wonder how everyone else is doing... i wonder if they even wanna talk about it. i wonder if cyrelle is okay.

july 16th, 2018:

jesse keeps calling me. i don’t know why he hasn’t stopped yet. i know why. so i don’t know why he keeps calling - how he hasn’t gotten the message yet. but i’d be lying if i said i didn’t wonder every now and again how cyrelle’s doing. it’s been hard to keep in touch with most of my old friends, we’re all unreachable for one reason or another. i think the only person still even kind of keeping us together is mx...

october 15th, 2018:

he’s dead. i saw it coming and i didn’t do shit about it. a goddamn idiot. who else am i gonna lose now? and i don’t just mean to substances or a lack of communication. i’ve lost a lot of people that way. but to death. to literal death, probably caused by substances. i’m so fucking scared cyrelle’s gonna be next, but we haven’t talked in so long i shouldn’t just go fucking meddling. there’s no point in pulling a jesse. dean didn’t fucking listen to me about mx, so who the hell’s to say cyrelle would listen to me about herself? and why should she even care? what are we to each other anymore, just acquaintances? it’s so fucking funny how people can leave your life as quickly as they came into it. maybe i’ll be next. it’d be a lot easier that way.

october 29th, 2019:

it’s cyrelle’s birthday today. i don’t think anyone’s having a good one anymore, at least not the people who aren’t coping well. i haven’t had any good ones that i can remember. but i still hope something good happened. maybe neil degrasse tyson finally admitted he was mutually feuding with her? i don’t know. we all have so little time.

march 23rd, 2020:

happy birthday to me. happy birthday to me. happy birthday mr. carpenter. happy birthday to me. i never liked birthdays, i didn’t want people to wish me happy them. but i never actually thought about what it’d be like to not hear it once i started hearing it. cyrelle, mx, nina... it’s weird. it’s odd that only one of those three is still alive. physically.

february 27th, 2021:

i haven’t tried to talk to cyrelle again. she hasn’t tried to talk to me again. i don’t know why i’m still writing about her. consider this my last entry. forever. it’s been real, my sweetest friend.

THE REMIX:

february 28th, 2014:

so many entries are gone. so i guess i’m writing about her again, but now i can write about anyone... because we’re all alive? it’s kinda tragic, isn’t it? we talked. it really was like it was 2014 again, but before all the bullshit happened. i don’t know which is more tragic: having to face up to all the dead people who don’t know they died and will probably die again, or having to face up to all the lost friends and recognize that so much time has passed but so little has too. i don’t wanna miss it this time around -- this might be the only good part of being 22 again. but i also don’t want to sacrifice our second chance. but even if i do... what will it matter in the long run? it’s just gonna repeat itself. why get my hopes up for anything different?

#answer !#ft. cyrelle #imagining august keeping a pink diary with a pink fluffy pen.#cyrellea

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words-writ-in-starlight · 6 years ago

Note

starlight! starlight!!! you're one of the few people I know who reads toby daye and pls I need to yell with someone about night and silence because IT WAS SO GOOD I'M DYING I HAD TO PUT THE BOOK DOWN AND WALK AWAY SEVERAL TIMES

@maelace asked:

Have you read the new October Daye book yet? Because oh my goodness I must know what you think!

Y’ALL

Y A L L

LET’S HAVE A CHAT

OKAY FOLKS

So, some FAIRLY INCOHERENT thoughts about Night and Silence, which I keep calling Nights and Silences because my brain really likes them plurals I guess:

FUCK AMANDINE!!!!!! FUUUUUUUCK AMANDINE!!!!!! I HATE HER SO MUCH!!!!!! SHE DOES NOT APPEAR ONCE AND YET I AM CONSUMED WITH RAGE

Seanan does such amazing work on all kinds of mental illness stuff, which I think I’ve discussed before re: Toby Daye and her ongoing upward mobility, but fuck the entire Tybalt plotline was so crushing. That’s what it’s like, is the thing, to watch someone you love retreating from you and not be able to do anything about it because you don’t want to hurt them worse, and I cheered out loud when he came back, and asking Ginevra to come stand in as regent was such a bittersweet scene because on the one hand yes Tybalt my love take care of yourself, but on the other hand I just want him to be okay. (FUCK Amandine, by the way)

I would die for Quentin, just kind of in general, but I’m specifically really delighted with the subplot of “Quentin thinks Toby could do better than this arrogant tomcat,” and I’m so proud of my best bisexual prince son for calling Tybalt and apparently just ripping into a King with all the worst swears Toby has ever taught him. I can’t goddamn wait for the King of the Westlands to be this charming, kind-hearted knight-ling whose impeccable etiquette and noble bearing is deeply and profoundly at odds with the fact that he has really kind of absorbed Toby’s problem-solving techniques.

Aside: there’s nothing I want more than for this series to go on long enough for the Court of the Westlands to be scandalized by their young king jumping up from his throne and hugging a grumpy changeling dressed in a blood-drenched leather coat without regard for his fine silk shirt. Even more than that, picture the scene. It’s the coronation of High King Quentin Sollys, attended by royalty and the highest celebrities of Faerie, Sir October Daye grinning fit to split her face with her husband Tybalt and her adopted nephew, the recently ascended King of Dreaming Cats, all looking ready to die from pride. Quentin’s parents are both crying perfect beautiful tears, as Daoine Sidhe do, and he’s about to be crowned and presented to the people and it’s great and then-- The ceremony is already underway when the door opens again to admit the Luidaeg, as her most terrifyingly Firstborn self, scowling like a storm cloud and gowned like a hurricane, and everyone is fucking terrified for a moment as she sweeps up the aisle toward the dais. And then she breaks into a smile and holds out her hands to the Crown Prince, and Quentin laughs and rushes into her arms as he cries “I thought you said couldn’t make it!” And everyone has a moment of religious fear when the sea witch pets his hair fondly and straightens his shirt and then presses a kiss to his forehead and declares to the room at large “You will be a king like none that Faerie has seen in many centuries, because you have a heart as strong and fair and kind as any I have ever seen.”

No one’s sure if it’s a blessing or a prophecy or just a moment of deeply unforeseen maternal affection from the goddamn Luidaeg, but suddenly the sea witch comes to visit the High King on a semi-regular basis and Quentin is delighted and...well, she was right.

Speaking of people I love, I love Danny? The best rock boy? He just wants Toby to talk about her feelings, it’s so sweet, I hope they invite him to the wedding so I can read about an eight-foot suit-wearing granite troll sobbing into a handkerchief about how proud he is of Toby.

I ALSO LOVE MAY, God, give me her and Jazz getting married please. Also I would love to know more about Jazz--maybe a book with the core mystery including Jazz’s flock of Ravenmays?

SOME TAM LIN SHIT GOIN’ DOWN IN THIS BOOK, I GOT A LOT TO SAY

We all know I’m a fucking weak bitch for Tam Lin retellings. Tam Lin being a lying piece of shit isn’t especially novel, but I LOVE the idea of Janet being the villain of the piece, however unintentionally? I’m honestly enthralled. Bitch...give me a novel...make the Luidaeg the main character and let me weep bitter tears for my beloved sea witch....

You know how I just had a whole bit about “Fuck Amandine” up there? I stand by it. Furthermore, FUCK JANET. Every time she gets nasty with Toby I puff up like an angry cat.

Incidentally, both Janet and Amandine had a (terrible) daughter they doted on, and when their daughter slipped away, they went out and got a replacement that they tried to force to be completely and entirely mortal, without regard for what their replacement wanted or what would be best for them--and ultimately, the person who took the most damage as a result of their selfishness was Toby both times. Janet is, I guess, slightly better because she seems to at least care about Gillian, but she’s still...weirdly possessive? She focuses a lot on how Gillian is hers, and hottest of hot takes, love and possession are not the same thing.

Sign me up for front row seats to all of Toby’s family losing their shit over how Janet treats her. Sign me up for seats in the goddamn orchestra pit when, having started to realize that, actually, Toby did not bail on her, and that Toby is actually a great person who wants nothing more than to have a relationship on Gillian’s terms, and that Janet actively arranged events to drive Toby out of Gillian’s life and then convinced Gillian that Toby didn’t love her, Gillian fucking Comes For Janet’s Whole Life.

Again, the Luidaeg is dear to my heart beyond words, so honestly the fact that she saved Toby all the way back in An Artificial Night by breaking Michael’s Ride like Janet broke Maeve’s, right down to singing the ballad of Tam Lin to hold the magic in place...not to sound like a little old white lady, but that shit is breathtaking, yo. Talk to me forever about how Toby is the first family the Luidaeg has loved and been loved by in a long time, about how the Luidaeg used the same ancient magic that destroyed her life to save this woman who wasn’t yet her favorite niece from the man who used to be her beloved brother, about how the Luidaeg’s entire life is about taking the skins of tragedies and making something new.

Anyway, on to non-Tam Lin things. Gillian...honey...you’ve been so lied to by so many people. Toby is the only parent who ever gave Gillian a choice in which life she wanted to live, and it’s so sad. All Gillian focuses on in the blood memories Toby sees is how much her car represents freedom and safety and...oh honey. Oh baby girl. If Janet and Cliff aren’t careful, now that Gillian knows that they manipulated the truth about Toby to completely take her away from Gillian, she’s going to straight up buck their rules and leave. (I...want Gillian to live with the Luidaeg? The only full Selkie in history to have the blessing of the sea witch, living with both feet in Faerie and getting coffee with her mother on weekends, turning the full count of Small Children Who Adore The Luidaeg from one to two. Let the Luidaeg be Gillian’s weird aunt.)

LET TOBY HAVE HER DAUGHTER BACK. On Gillian’s terms, because Toby wouldn’t want it any other way, but God, just let them have a relationship. Let Gillian meet someone who doesn’t have Jocelyn’s blind hero worship or the Luidaeg’s ingrained sense of honor and who will tell her that her mom, A, did not voluntarily leave her, and, B, is legitimately rad as fuck. And then let them start with awkward weekly coffee dates that turn into an awkward dinner at Toby’s house that turns into a slightly less awkward trip to the movies or something and so on and so forth until they’re close and Gillian understands how much Toby loves her and Toby understands that sometimes it’s okay to push for a relationship. Because Toby’s willing to do the work, but she’s not willing to push for the relationship because she believes Gillian doesn’t want her around, but Gillian only thinks that way because she believes Toby abandoned her, and the only way that vicious loop is going to change is if Toby actually pushes the boundaries for long enough to explain.

It’s so adorable how Toby thinks Quentin’s gonna be her last squire. My boy’s going to be gone for two months before Toby comes back to the house with a baker’s dozen children and a mulish expression. Within a hundred pages she goes from “I’m never having another squire because I’m so unfit for this” to “I should reopen Home and run it myself” and I just. I love her so much. She’s so dumb. She has such a good heart and she’s so dumb. I’d die for her. Every fifteen pages in any Toby Daye book I just end up crooning “You’re so stupid, I love you so much” to the pages while Toby fails to notice, again, what an incredible person she is. I’ve loved watching her grow so much, I’m getting weepy here.

OH MY GOD, AND THE NOVELLA?

HOLY SHIT, THAT JUST. DESTROYED MY WHOLE SOUL. EXACTLY EVERYTHING I’VE EVER WANTED FROM A STORY ABOUT A NEW SELKIE. I FEEL LIKE THIS GIVES A LOT OF SUPPORT TO MY HEADCANON THAT SELKIES HAVE TERRIBLE DREAMS ABOUT BEING CLUTCHED IN BLOODY HANDS WHILE A VOICE WEEPS FOR THEIR MOTHER IN THEIR EAR. I WANT FIRTHA AND GILLIAN TO BE BEST FRIENDS. I LOVE HOW DIFFERENTLY FIRTHA OBVIOUSLY TREATS GILLIAN, THE FIRST SELKIE IN HISTORY WHO DID NOT CHOOSE THIS. I LOVE HOW MUCH ATTENTION IS GIVEN TO THE CHOICE THAT SELKIES MAKE, TO TAKE THE SKIN AND ALL IT CARRIES OR DIE.

I LOVE SELKIES IN THIS UNIVERSE. I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE THE LUIDAEG CALL IN THAT FUCKING DEBT. HOLY SHIT.

#october daye #night and silence #toby daye #obviously this is all spoilers so don't come crying to me if you read it before the book #also: i said i wasn't going to be cogent ahead of time so don't @ me #i need to write a fic about liz after she becomes a full selkie because...y'all #i'm so married to that headcanon it's not even funny #it means so much to me that gillian is the world's first truly innocent selkie #the only selkie in the WORLD who has the true and unflinching love of the sea witch #the luidaeg loves all the selkies in a way--loves them for keeping her children alive and hates them for her children's sake #but gillian...with gillian it isn't complicated #gillian is the daughter of the only close relative the luidaeg has who loves her #true and unflinching #and gillian is her mother's daughter so of course the luidaeg loves her #and gillian's hands are clean and she speaks with firtha and she has firtha's skin on her back #and the luidaeg can't help but love her for all those things #god y'all i got A LOT of feelings about these folks #thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to just yell profusely about this book goddamn #idiot teenagers with a queue #redjayson #asked and answered

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sunshinee-sunflowerr · 3 years ago

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When I saw this I was immediately triggered and that’s how I knew I had to share it. Other than the fact that it is important as fuck to share something like this. But the second part of that post almost aligns with what had happened to me with my ex Dan. I have issues with sexual dysfunction and tend to lose feeling down there and that leaves me feeling betrayed by my own body. I feel so worthless and pathetic already as it is when it happens because I’m sensitive and it is humiliating when I start to cry. I don’t even get to like fully enjoy something so intimate because I’m a very passionate person and I love all types of deep connection. And he ruined it. It had stopped being such a beautiful thing for me. The second I asked him to stop and that I had mentioned I wasn’t enjoying it, he became the person I didn’t think he could truly ever be. He laid down on me. Like I’m talking all of his weight was on me, and he whined about how good it felt to stay in me and finish. I felt nothing and everything all at the same time, I wasn’t being heard, I was just a body, and I didn’t matter anymore. This was someone who was stronger than me. This was someone who I loved and straight up disrespected me to the point where I myself are in a traumatic position, I had to literally match his thrusts just so he’d come faster because I knew that was the only safe way to get him off of me. And that was humiliating and violating. I had no other choice. And to this day this man still tries to say he didn’t rape me but SIR WHEN YOU DO SHIT LIKE THAT YOU ARE A FUCKING RAPIST. YOU IGNORED MY PLEAS AND MADE ME FEEL SO UNSAFE AND I FELT LIKE MY BODY WASN’T EVEN FUCKING MINE ANYMORE. YOU GAVE ME PTSD FOR ALL THE OTHER FUCKED UP TIMES THAT I HAD LET SLIDE BECAUSE I FELT COERCED INTO IT. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID AND I KNOW WHAT YOU DID. And what had haunted me every time I wanted to go somewhere, I had to take my car. It happened in my car. I had to drive myself after that with cum dripping down my legs. I had to see a flashback every time my mind drifted towards the back. I will never EVER let myself be in that position again. Dan broke me. I’m the one who pulled myself out and I’m still healing.

It was from 2016 and trauma tells no time, I’m lucky I don’t feel the weight of your body still pinning me down during intimate times. I saw you in the faces of whoever was on top of me. I would get panic attacks and cry. You fucking ruined me and my trust and I will ruin you if you ever dare try to come into my life again.

The Relationship Aspect:

Not many people know about the sleep fucking, or when you would take my thumb out of my mouth when I was asleep because I still had some hard time sleeping so I would suck my thumb sometimes and you would replace your it with your dick and then ejaculate down my throat and I'd wake up to such a horrible taste. My inner child does scream for she was only 15-17 and I let it slide because you had so much power over me and I did so much to make you happy even though it didn't make me happy myself. Let's not forget when I wasn't in the mood sometimes so you would turn around away from me with no sound nothing and straight up fell asleep because I said no or that I don't want to have sex with you. And then there were times where you would sexualize me, you would look up my skirt or you would look at my pants and tell me about my panty lines and basically scare me and make feel little. You were constantly pointing them out and laughing, conditioning me even to never wear comfy underwear, I have more thongs than any type of other underwear. And now I'm finally getting used to wearing normal underwear again just because I was felt like someone was doing the same shit that you did to me. I felt grimy. And let's not forget when you would steal my panties and you would bring them home and jerk off in them and cum in them and to top it all off you would bring them back to my house and throw them in my dirty laundry so they can be washed so you can repeat that cycle. And the worst part is that you probably took some before we broke up and I never got them back. Fuck you. How about all those times you never asked if you could cum in me but you still did even though I fucking hated it, and you’d get mad at me when your sheets were ruined because of you the mess you made in me and I still fucking hate it it's only such a rare occasion for me to ever let that happen during any intimate moment now. Also let's not forget your greediness for my photos. My naked photos that you kept to get off to even after we broke up and still demanded more and other shit when I was with someone else it was disgusting.

The Party:

Oh here’s a memory that’s gonna be fucking me soon, once late October arrives I’m going to be thinking about that night I decided to try and most past you. That fucking college party was the biggest gray area that was so painful and smoggy. It was grey because I was still figuring my shit out and mentally screwed up from the actions of you. I'll never forget, how are used to feel guilty and how are used to blame myself for all of this. And I got to a point where we had mutual friends and I just wanted to forget all about it and learn to forgive you. As soon as ready, Matt and I went to that party that Anthony was throwing and you were there, and you had no problem laughing off your drunk ass I front of me about rape jokes. If I hadn't been high and Matt being so drunk we would've left and I remember calling my mom in the hallway crying telling her about that little part of what happened that night. And then later that night you got so fucking drunk, made everybody your babysitter and I still fucking hate myself for the side you brought out even though you caused me so much harm. You brought out my fucking maternal side which I hated because like I said in that moment of time it wasn’t black or white for me, it was grey. It was so fucking gray. And I took care of you that night because you were so fucking drunk, I remember you asking me or saying something about how I hated you. And then later that night I ended up sandwiched between you and Matt, and you decided to touch me through my pants even when I was cuddled up to Matt and I thought maybe there would’ve been some change but in the end you were still assaulting me. I didn’t sleep at all that night, and it sent me backwards, I felt like all of the progress that I had made was gone it was dehumanizing and I threw out those sweatpants and they were brand fucking new and they were Calvin Klein my favorite designer which hurt even more because I used my money to get something I really wanted for comfort and you just stumble in cocked off of what 3 beers? And ruin even the smallest things that could’ve made me more comfortable? Heinous and out right disgustingly disrespectful.

Trauma talk aftermath:

I betrayed myself sleeping with you even after the rape, and you knew so much about me so I couldn't even fucking report it even though I had the proof of you admitting to what you did. But Im always scared because my reputation was at stake and it was so easily corrupted by your lies as it is. I had no choice. You could've easily ruined my life and I wasn't about to let you so I ruined mine but little did I know that you were already ruining mine. And you still haven't taken accountability for your actions and I'm still suffering the consequences of those horrible behaviors that you were still using to this day probably. And I can't even imagine how many other girls like me there must be now.

Here's to all the nightmares that circulate in my head at night still in that feeling of fear of having and experiencing that PTSD kick into hyper drive. And all the ones I've yet to have when I have new partners in my life, because I have nightmares of them doing the same thing that you did to me and it's traumatizing. Because even though I know they are not you for that split second I am terrified of them. And I saw another post about how when sexual assault survivors even get a whiff of the scent of their abuser they are in panic; and I honestly don't blame them. I was at school the other day, and in the air I smell whatever type of detergent was used to fill the air with your scent, I was in panic for a couple minutes looking around trying to figure it out where you were. It's so fucked up that you've had such lasting effects on me like why isn’t hating you and going through all of that trauma shit enough. And I'm so tired of the panic and anxiety attacks that you still bring into my life whether it is indirect or direct.

And looking back now after going off of that and emotional spiel about what you did and how I still feel towards these events today. I realize all the ways how I am not gonna be treated in the future. You saw the light inside of me, and when you stepped into my life that light dimmed within each day that passed that I saw who you were. And it took all of my power away; but I am taking all of that power back and you will never ever use it again and you will never have it in your possession because I know I will forever be a better person and not let you win. And I know that I wasn't a good girlfriend at the time as well but you were also I'm manipulative narcissistic asshole. And I blamed myself for all of the times that I was mad at you and thought I deserved it all. And I deserve none of that shit. It was you that didn’t deserve me and all the love I gave you. All of clothes I bought you, all of the stupid ass Pokémon cards i grabbed for you because I knew it was important to you to collect them, all of the silly $7 cards to go with each thing I gave you. All of the handwritten notes. Helping you match your clothes and fold your shit. Fuck you and for all you have taken from me and didn’t even fucking say sorry or be truly appreciative.

More Trauma Talk 2020-2021 edition:

Consent is so important to me, because it was stolen from me as a child, as a teenager, and as an adult. I want to take a moment to also talk about my second ex-boyfriend named Dan as well how ironic I never thought I'd say I love you Dan ever again. But the first night we hooked up, he was so patient with me which in all honestly is sad but it truly took my breath away with the time that he spent on me making sure I knew that I was safe because he knew that I have been raped. And every once in a while he asked me if I was OK and I thought that was the most amazing thing ever little did I know that that's actually what you're supposed to do and that it's not the bare minimum. And after all of that he still had one of those moments where he traumatized me and put me back into the place where you had put me days before Christmas… which is now a tainted holiday as well as Halloween for me. Thanks a lot.

Wow… fuck this is a lot for anyone let alone me to endure and/or read and I just want to say that felt so fucking good to finally write it all down and speak my truth and let others know that not every sexual assault or rape has to be violent (well it’s violence either way, but you know getting the shit beaten out of you stereotypical type) it can be sweet until it turns sour, it can be public, it can be sneaky, it can be with someone you gained the ability to trust who was so good in the beginning. It can be anyone and that’s the real scary part because I don’t know whose intentions are actually true until they read my stuff and reassure me about how they feel about me. It’s the only way and even then I’m still scared of wanting to be intimate with someone new. It’s another strong reason as to why I am practicing celibacy for a bit.

Finished on 9/20/2021

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