#he did this in going native as well when butters said that kenny was his best friend he’s so jealous i’m crying 😭

[kenmancanon]

someone’s jealous

[mystewion]

are gay people real

in short:

South Park Elementary School Cafeteria, day. The kids are seated for lunch. At the center table are Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Token, Clyde and Craig. Cartman runs in from the hallwayCartmanFELLAS! Fellas!StanWhat?CartmanYou'll never guess what happened. Butters just beat up Scott Malkinson!KyleButters? [He and Stan look puzzled] Why?CartmanIt was crazy! Scott was just talking about how he needed to take his insulin shot, and out of nowhere Butters said he's sick of people with diabetes feeling sorry for themselves. Scott told Butters to shut up and Butters just started whaling on him!StanYou're talking about Butters.CartmanDude, I'm telling you! Butters beat the crap out of Scott, and then he locked himself in the bathroom! [The other boys get concerned and leave their tables to go to the restroom]The restroom around the corner from the cafeteria. Jimmy has joined the boys. Stan bangs on the doorStanButters?ButtersLeave me alone!StanButters, come out here.ButtersGet out of here, all of ya! [Stan turns to the other boys and shrugs]KyleButters, people can't just go around beating up people who have diabetes! Now whatever your problem is, you just-Butters[Runs out of the restroom up to Kyle and points at him] You just think you know everything, don't you Kyle?! Every little thing you gotta shoot your mouth off like you're the frickin' expert! Well you don't know everything because [walks to Stan and points him out] your best friend is a kid who thinks the entire planet revolves around him and he only cares about HIS image! [runs back inside the boys room, then turns around and runs to Cartman] You guys think Cartman is the only selfish piece of crap in this school? You're all fake and stuck up [moves over to Jimmy], and none of you have the courage to tell Jimmy that his jokes aren't funny! [moves over to Kenny] The only kid here with any sense of dignity is Kenny, and the rest of you have your heads up your butts! [Runs back into the restroom and locks himself in. The other boys are stunned and silent]CartmanWell. Apparently Kenny is Butters' best friend. You guys gonna make out, Kenny? [Kenny flashes an angry look]Butters[Runs out of the restroom again and storms up to Cartman] And that's another thing! You're always trivializing everything I say by gettin' the last word! [Cartman looks stunned]Well you're not gettin' the last word this time! [Runs back into the boys restroom and locks himself in]Cartman...Wow.Butters[Opens the door and peeks out] Double wow! [Closes the door and locks it]The principal's office, Day. Principal Victoria is talking to Butters and his parents.Principal VictoriaI'm sorry, but your son is distracting the other students and his attitude is just getting worse.StephenButters, what on earth has gotten into you?!Butters[In a gruff voice] I don't know, Dad, ah I was just pissed off, I guess!LindaDo you think this behavior is fair to your teacher and classmates?!ButtersI don't suppose it is, but I don't give a darn!StephenDo you have any idea how grounded you are about to be, mister?!ButtersWhy don't you shut up, Dad, and stick it in your ear, for cryin' out loud! [Both parents look taken aback as a moment of silence follows]Linda[looks at Stephen] Stephen, are you thinking what I'm thinking?StephenYes. Our little Butters is flowering. He has reached the age of panua.Principal VictoriaEh-excuse me?StephenPrincipal Victoria, this isn't Butters' fault.ButtersIt's not?!StephenIt has to do with... biology. [turns right and walks off a bit] You've... maybe noticed that Butters isn't... exactly like other kids.ButtersYeah?StephenYou probably think Butters seems somehow... different.Butters[normal voice] Hey yeah, all the time.StephenIt's because he is. [Turns around and faces Principal Victoria] His mother and I... his whole family were... we're not of this place.Principal VictoriaAh I'm sorry, I really don't understand.StephenPlease, just try to understand that for our people it's a very private matter. He can't be helped by your discipline; this must be dealt with by his own kind. If it's all right with you, we'd like an extended leave for our boy. Please. It's a cultural thing.The Stotch house, day. Stephen and Linda argue as Butters sits on the couchLindaI don't want him to go, Stephen, he's too young!StephenIt's our people's way, Linda, you know that better than I do!LindaThen we can go with him.StephenYou know that's not allowed!ButtersWill somebody tell me what the frickity fookshmere is goin' on?!StephenButters, you've reached the age where you must journey to your birthplace for the ceremony of hapa noa.ButtersUhbu-but I'm from here.StephenNo. We moved here just before you started pre-school. You were born in our native land, Butters. [Walks to a bookshelf and grabs a scrapbook] A distant and very secluded island world called... Hava'i.ButtersWe're from Hawaii?Stephen[Sits on the sofa next to Butters. Linda sits to his left] Only haoles pronounce it Hawaii, Butters, but those of us from Hava'i are a very special people. We have many customs and traditions to keep our culture alive. [Opens the book and points some pictures out to him] We drink chi-chi's from the coconut. We eat poke that the Safeway provides. And when we've chosen a mate, we marry at the fern grotto, as your mother and I did so... very long ago. As a Stotch, Butters, you are actually Hawaiian royalty. Your grandma and grandpa were there at the time of the King. [Flips backwards a few pages and shows him a picture of Elvis Presley playing a ukulele with a picture of Diamondhead in the background.]ButtersBut what does being Hawaiian have to do with me acting like an emo chick on her period?StephenNot an emo chick on her period, Butters. Like a salmon needing to swim back upriver. All Hawaiians feel it. It is called "hapahui apahoha", and it means it's now your time to make your trip to our island home. You must do your walkabout to your homeland, Butters. And you must do it alone. [Linda stands up and starts crying. Stephen stands up and takes out his wallet] Take this, son. It is our Mahalo Rewards card. It will provide you with all you need. And now I must turn my back on you. [He turns his back to Butters. Linda weeps silently. Butters is speechless]The neighborhood park, day. The boys from the table are playing basketball, and Jimmy joins in. Kenny tosses the basketball at Kyle, who makes a shot, and Cartman runs up to them from the sidewalk. Stan catches the ballCartmanHoly shit balls! Holy shit balls! Guess what, you guys? Holy shit balls. [The other boys gather around him]KyleWhat?CartmanButters just got on a bus with his backpack and said he's going to Hawaii.StanHawaii?CartmanHe said he had to go back to his homeland, and then told me it was none of my business and to keep my fat mouth shut.KyleDude, what the hell? Somebody's gotta stop him.Stan[Turns to the basket] After all the things he said to us, he can go ahead. [Makes a shot at close range]KyleKenny, you're clearly his best friend. Go stop him.Kenny(I'm not his best friend.)CartmanYeah, Mr. Perfect, go rescue Butters so he can lick your balls some more. [Kenny sighs and walks away with his head down.]The airport, day. Kenny arrives and walks into the Alpha Air terminal. He sees Butters seated on a seat in an empty row, with two suitcases at his feet. He's sobbing. Kenny walks overKenny(Butters, come on.)ButtersThey won't let me on the plane. Why, I can't do anything right! [Kenny takes one suitcase and Butters' right hand, Butters takes the other suitcase, and they walk. Suddenly Butters stops and pulls his hand away] No, no! I have to go to Hawaii, Kenny! I have no idea what's waiting there for me, but I guh, I can't go on like this! [Kenny sighs, then takes Butters to the teller]Kenny(Excuse me, he needs to go to Hawaii.)TellerI already told him, I can't allow anyone on the aircraft who appears to be intoxicated.ButtersI'm not intoxicated, you skank! I'm just "deligerent" because of my hapanuanalua!Kenny(Please, could you just let him on the plane? It's really important. Please?)TellerTell you what: there's plenty of points on his Mahalo Rewards card. If you wanna fly with him, I can let him go.Kenny(Me?)ButtersCan't you see I'm in horrible pain?! Do you have any idea what-?!Kenny[Puts his hand over Butters mouth to shut him up] (Okay, okay! I'll go.) [Scene cuts to the plane flying towards Hawaii]Lihu'e Airport, Kaua'i, Runway B-5. The plane lands and Butters and Kenny enter the terminal. Butters has picked up his bagsButters[Slowly, as he looks around] Well, we're here, now what do I do? [Kenny points to the information officer nearby, and they walk to him]OfficerCan I help you with anything?ButtersUh yeah, I uh, I'm not sure where I'm supposed to go?OfficerOkay, were you with a cruise ship or land tour group?ButtersOh, ah, I'm not a tourist. I'm a native Hawaiian. [The officer just looks at him. A group of Americans approaches him]Blond ManButters Stotch?ButtersYeah?Blond ManWelcome home, young keiki. Your parents said you would be coming for your ceremony. [Notices Kenny] Ah- uh, who's this?ButtersOh thi-this is my friend, Kenny.Older WomanButters, native Hawaiians don't really approve of haoles coming to their ceremonies.ButtersOh please, i-if it weren't for him I couldn't have come.Blond ManVery well, we shall speak with the chief of our island and see. Come now. [Everyone leaves]En route to the chief, day. They go down the road, all packed into an SUV.ButtersYou folks are all native Hawaiians too?Older Man[Driving] Yes. My wife Patty and I have been coming to Kaua'i for almost five years, and Bill and Donna actually own a time share in Poipu.DonnaYes, but Poipu is getting pretty overrun with tourists, I'm afraid.Blond Man[Leans to the right, behind the older man] Let us eat.Older ManOh yea, let us eat. [They stop at Kuwahara Saimin's drive-through] Aloha, five order of saimin, please.ButtersWhat's "saimin"?PattyIt's one of the foods of our people.Older ManOh, I get 20% off, I'm a native. Here's my Mahalo Rewards card. [The cashier notes the card and takes the cash, the older man takes the food, and they're off.] Mahalo. [They soon find themselves behind a slow car with the passenger taking pictures of the scenery. The older man honks.] Come on, you frickin' tourist! Jesus, buy a post card! [Stops and points out a building] These are the ancient ruins of our ancestors. [It's the Coco Palms, long abandoned.] They say the spirit of the king is still in there.Blond ManYou must stay away from this place. It is kapu.Brunet ManKapu. that means "taboo", [points to Kenny] especially to haoles! [they drive off]Older ManUh that there is Bubba's Burgers. [Scene shows Bubba's Burgers] In Havai'i us natives say "Bubba's Bruk". [they pass by a big hotel] Here's the Sheraton, just another megahotel for the throngs of tourists. Here's where many of us natives live. The Sheraton Residences. [A gated community is shown. The Older Man flashes his Mahalo Rewards card to the guard] It's all right, we're natives. [The guard opens the gate and lets them in. They arrive at the chief's residence and step out to talk to him] Protector and Chief, I present to you the keiki, Butters Stotch.ChiefAh, Stephen and Linda's child. Last time I saw you, you were the size of a coconut. Who's the haole?Kenny's room at the Residences, night. He sits by the open window with a lit candle, a pencil and a sheet of paper. He begins to write.KennyMy dearest friends,:I am living amongst the natives in the remote and tiny island of Kava'i. What can I tell you of this mysterious island and its people? It is a place of wonder, and yet to the outsider like me, a place of odd tradition. The people here are peaceful and joyous, and seem to care little for the rush and worry of the outside world. Their diet is mostly an odd mixture of coconut milk, pineapple juice, and vodka, which they call the chi-chi. As for Butters, he is quickly learning the ways of his ancestors, and seems to be feeling better with every passing day. He still seems quite angry at times, but luckily his ceremony will finally take place on the morrow.As he writes, the following scenes are shown: First, the Safeway supermarket. The people greet each other with a fist, with pinky and thumb extended. Next, three kids are playing in a pool while Donna enjoys her chi-chi and the older couple sit on chaise longues in the background. Next, Kenny is at the bar order a chi-chi. Next, Butters learns how to play bocce ball. Next, Stan reads the letter to Cartman and KyleStan[reading the letter] "On the morrow"? What the fuck is wrong with Kenny?KennyTo wit, I have found nothing wrong with this remote place, and I must admit it will be with some melancholy that I will leave this island and return home.

I saw this chick in a bikini on the beach too. She had the nicest boobs ever. Humbly yours, Kenneth.

A luau, day. All the natives are in line for lunch before the ceremony begins. Butters stands on a platform before the chief while Kenny watches onChiefIn the time-honored traditions of our ancestors, we honor the native Hawaiian Butters Stotch with his hapa noa. [everyone cheers and and woman slips a necklace onto his neck] The shark-tooth necklace represents your connection to our island. [a horn blower comes in with a conch shell and blows into it... badly] Now drink the chi-chi! [Patty walks over with a glass of it and gives it to Butters, who begins to drink it through a straw.]Butters[turns right and coughs, then] Whoa, it's like gasoline!ChiefDrink, young keiki, and you will feel the last of your aggression melt away.Butters[Finishes the rest of the drink, then stumbles just a little bit and smiles] Hey, uh now I do feel butter, uh better.ChiefO spirits of ancestors, we ask that you bless this native Hawaiian with his hapa noa! We ask that you-Blond Man[runs in] Listen! [climbs onto a table] Listen everyone! I have terrible, horrible news!ChiefDo you realize that you are interrupting a hapa noa?Blond ManI've just come from the front office! The Mahalo Rewards card is... [chokes]ChiefWhat?! What has happened? Speak!Blond ManThe Mahalo Rewards card is being eliminated! They're trying to say our points are... are... no longer going to be accepted.Chief[Rises from his chair and walks to his left] I knew one day it would come to this.PattyTo what? What does this mean?ChiefThe haoles are trying to do away with us.Resident 1With no rewards program, there will be no distinction between who's a native to this island and who isn't!Resident 2Why can't you people respect our island? Why do you always want nore?!ChiefI'm sorry keiki, your hapa noa will have to wait! For we must unite together as never before! It is time to show the haoles that this is our island! [this draws cheers from everyone]A seaside golf course, day. A cruise ship is some distance from the shore when it blows its horn. A group of natives stand by their golf ballsChief[Yelling at the ship] Stop ruining our island, haoles! FIRE! [The natives fire away into the ocean. Some of the golf balls land in the water, some of them reach the ship]First MateWhat are they doing? [The passengers are being pelted with golf balls.]Chief[Walks over to Butters and gives him a club] Take a swing! Let them know they are not welcome!ButtersI've never done this before. [Gets into position]ChiefIt's all right. Just try to tap into that anger that's inside you.ButtersAim... my anger! Stupid [Swings successfully] Ben Affleck! [The golf ball sails through the air and enters the bridge, smashing through the window and the captain's binoculars. The first mate shrieks] Waaah! [The captain stumbles onto a controller and breaks it with sheer momentum. The ship begins to pitch back and sink. Passengers begin to tumble towards the water. Butters is dumbfounded. The ship breaks in two]ManHold on! [The golf club just falls out of Butters' left hand] Hold on!WomanOh I can't! I can't! I can't hold on!ManI love you! I love you!WomanNo! I love you! I love you back! [The ship vanishes below the water]Breaking NewsAnnouncerThis is breaking news!AnchorAn insurrection in the Hawaiian Islands has escalated to war! After sinking a cruise ship, the natives of Kauai continue to go berserk, forcing all tourists off their island.Man 1They just pushed us onto airplanes and said we weren't welcome anymore!Woman 1Then a little boy called me a skank.Anchor[A picture of Barack Obama appears over his shoulder] The President says he will send the Coast Guard to take the island back, though he sympathizes, being a native Hawaiian himself. [Thinks about it for a second] Hm.The ceremonial plaza, day.ChiefAre all the tourists gone from our island?Resident 3All but a few who are hiding out at Duke's Restaurant. We sent Bob and Trisha Turner to smoke them out.Resident 4What about him?Kenny(What about me?)Resident 4He's a tourist and he knows everything! We have to kill him!Butters[Jumps in front of Kenny to shield him] No! Kenny's my friend! He's the only kid at school I actually like, you buncha jerks!ChiefBe careful young keiki, your anger still controls you because we were not able to finish the ceremony. Perhaps we should finish it now.Resident 4Finish his ceremony?! We are at war, David! I have lived on this island for ten years. Ten years! Every July and part of August! And I can tell you all that what we are about to face from the haoles is nothing short of genocide!Resident 5He's right, David. We can't trust any tourists.ButtersHe won't betray us! Will you, Kenny?!Kenny(No, I'm not going to fucking betray anybody!)Resident 6Then let him prove himself! Trial by opahika'a!Chief DavidHe's only a child!Resident 4If he wants to be one of us, then he must face the challenge!Chief DavidVery well. [The horn blower, Resident 5, returns to blow the conch shell]On the bank of a river flowing by the Residences, day. David and Butters are there with the rest of the residents in the background, and Kenny is...Blond ManThis isn't right! He's not a native! He's gonna get killed!ButtersKenny, be careful!Chief DavidQuiet. He must face this challenge alone. [Kenny is on a surfboard on the river using a small paddle to get somewhere]Resident 1By the gods! Perhaps he has the heart of a native after all!Resident 4He still has yet to make the turn! [Kenny reaches a buoy in the middle of the river and paddles around it, then makes his way back to the riverbank.]ResidentsHohhh!Resident 7[A little tipsy from his drink] That's pretty good. [Kenny slows down, then loses his balance and falls into the river]Kenny(Whoops!)ButtersKenny!ResidentsAwwwww. [A second later they all turn away and leave. Butters stays at the riverbank.]Resident 4[To another Resident] I told you a haole couldn't do it!Chief DavidDid you make the turn your first try? Did any of us? [Kenny pops up behind them and floats down the river]Resident 8[A woman, walks up to Butters] Don't worry, Butters, your friend will find a way back to his kind. The gods will protect him. [She extends her left hand and guides him away]Kenny looks downriver and sees a waterfall. He panics and quickly dog paddles away from it, but the current overwhelms him and he goes over. He bumps into several rocks, each bigger than the last, on his way down, head firstSmith's Tropical Paradise, day. David has assembled the residents into this building and now talks to themChief DavidWe have called for this great meeting because if we are to survive this war, all the native Hawaiian tribes must join as one!Resident 9We're not joining the people of the Hyatt Grand Vacations! They have no rights to call themselves natives!Vacationer 1Oh and you do?! Your ancestors came on an airplane six months ago! Our ancestors sailed here! On a cruise ship! Nine months ago!Chief DavidLook, if we are to fight the haoles, we have to allow all natives to stay!CanyonerIt doesn't matter how many tribes we have, we can't win! We are but a few against the haole's military might! We may have passion, but passion does not win wars!Chief DavidOh no? Come up here, keiki. Come on. [Butters gets on stage with David] This child sunk a cruise ship by himself! Tell them keiki. [Hands the mic to Butters]ButtersWell I don't know about the rest of ya, but I'm sick and tired of bein' pushed around all the time! I came all the way down here for my hapa noa ceremony, and I can't even have it, 'cause the fucking haoles have to ruin everything!Resident 9Yeah!Vacationer 1Screw them!ButtersWell if you ask me, the only good haole is a dead haole! With a, with a stick up his butthole, and his wiener cut off! Rraahhhh!Chief DavidLet us make a pact with more chi-chis!Resident 10[goes to serve himself some more chi-chi from the barrels, but finds there isn't any] Um, we're... we're out of chi-chis.Resident 11Oh, right, we've closed off all the ports.Resident 12But they're still letting vodka through, right? Uh... they can't cut off our chi-chis.Chief David...Oh my God.Downriver, day. Kenny crawls onto the riverbank, coughs, and looks up. He's across the road from Coco Palms. He stands up and walks towards it. He looks around and heads in, but first waits for a bunch of bats to fly out of the cavernous entrance. Meanwhile, offshore, the U.S. Coast Guard shows up in force to deal with the nativesCaptainThis is the U.S. Coast Guard! We have instructions to take you by force, if necessary!Chief David[heading up a large group of natives] Ready? Fire! [the natives fire off their golf balls, but none of them have any effect on the Coast Guard]Captain[Lowers his binoculars, then flatly] Fire. [The ships' guns fire away and decimate many of the natives]Chief DavidArm the bocce balls! [Surviving natives arm bocce balls into slingshots stretched between palm trees. One of them lands on the main ship with a heavy thud]CaptainGod damn it.Chief DavidKeep fighting! Stand your ground!Resident 4We can't fight without chi-chis!Chief DavidYou can and you MUST!Butters[He has six golf balls in front of him and he hits each one towards the Coast Guard] Stupid! Greedy! Haoles! Kill! Them! All!Kenny walks through the Coco Palms, which is dark and spooky. A voice is soon heard, and Kenny stops in his tracks. He turns and runs away, but steps onto a patch covering a hole on the floor and falls in. He recovers and looks up to see the shining ghost of Elvis Presley. He beckons Kenny to follow him, mumbling just like Kenny does.The KingCome on, come on. [Mumbles a few more things as they walk towards a door. Elvis stops and pulls a lever, and a wall rises to reveal loads of absolute vodka, pineapple juice, coconut milk, and macadamia nut liqueur, all the ingredients needed for chi-chis. Elvis walks up to the doorway and motions to Kenny] You know what chi-chis are, right?The Residences, day, on the ceremonial plaza, Chief David admits defeatChief DavidListen everyone, we gave it all we had. It's over. We must go down to Nowiliwili Harbor, and surrender to the American government.Butters[Runs onto the plaza] Surrender?! No, the heck with that!Resident 4We can't hold out here any longer!ButtersWell I won't do it, you hear me?! I'm not licking anybody's... testes!Chief DavidYoung keiki, try to control your anger.ButtersNo! This is our home! And I'm sick of everyone who thinks they're better than me just 'cause they've got good looks, and just 'cause, even after massacring Daredevil, they happen to come back and hit a home run that everyone likes! You shouldn't be able to be good-looking and be with Jennifer Lopez and be a good director! [Turns around and walks away] All right all right fine! Argo is a good movie! There, I admitted it! I told people that it didn't hold up, but it holds up god darn it! Ben Affleck has everything, GRAGH!Resident 13Everyone! Look, I say! [Everyone comes to see, and it's Kenny coming back with a raft full of absolute vodka, pineapple juice, coconut milk, and macadamia nut liqueur. Everyone cheers him on]Resident 14The haole did it!KennyMy dear friends of the mainland,:What adventures I have found on the tiny island of Kava'i. I have truly become one with the natives, who found new courage to fight their oppressors.Chief DavidWe are not surrendering today! Go back and tell your leaders that we will fight them until the end! [Everyone cheers]CaptainYou people just don't give up, do ya?KennyThe American government finally gave in to the natives and had the Mahalo Rewards cards reinstated. Our two cultures, it appears, will once again live in peace.Everyone cheers, even the Coast Guard captainKennyWith the war at an end, our Butters is able to have his hapa noa ceremony. And with any help from the gods, become his old cheery self again.The hapa noa ceremony, day. Butters will finally become a full-fledged member of his tribeChief DavidAnd so it is with great honor that we recognize these two natives with their hapa noa. Take your cards, boys. [Two women come up and give them their cards] Apuiloa hapnanoaha! Hapa'a'a hohaaa! [Resident 5 returns to blow the conch shell a third time.] It's finally over, young keiki. Is your anger at rest?Butters[He thinks for a moment] Yeah, I guess so. Except it still doesn't change the fact that Ben Affleck gets to be handsome, talented, and then gets to go home and kiss Jennifer Lopez.Resident 15Ben Affleck isn't with Jennifer Lopez anymore, he's married to Jennifer Gardner.ResidentsYeah, it's true, uh huh.ButtersWhat? Really? But I thought I was totally jealous of him. He's just married to Jennifer Gardner? Oh my God, I feel so much better. [smiles with relief]Kenny(You do?)ButtersYeah, ogh, I like that Ben Affleck guy. He's a good filmmaker. Come on, Kenny, I guess I owe the kids at school an apology. [He and Kenny walk off into the sunset] Did you see Argo, Kenny? It's a pretty good movie. Ben Affleck has a lot goin' for him. Not everything, but a lot. Whoopie!

[newstanmarshblog]

The Average and Unusual Couple: Chapter Three

   Today is the day that Lydia starts her first day at South Park middle school, and she feels a little nervous on how she’ll get along with the students there. Early in the morning before leaving, she and Beetlejuice had one quick conversation on how he wanted to join her during her first day. But Lydia had said that she wanted to experience the first day by herself to see if she’ll be alright on her own moving forward before making a decision if she’ll allowed her ghostly best friend to join her or not. Even though Beetlejuice hated on not able to join her at school for the time being, he is at least excited to hang out with her while exploring South Park as he and Lydia discussed about it last Saturday weekend.

   Before entering into the school, she takes a deep breath.

   Lydia: Alright, here goes nothing.

   As Lydia walks in, not far from behind, Stan and his friends were starting to make their way to the school building.

   Cartman angry: This is so fucking ridiculous. I should be at home right now getting myself some extra sleep.

   Stan: Come on, Cartman. Don’t get too upset about it. The school did promise on an optional lunch choice menu between Turkey Sub Sandwich and Sloppy Joe.

   Cartman: Oh yeah, I’ve forgotten about that.

   Kenny: I can’t wait to taste their Sloppy Joes again for the first time since our last day being over here.

   Kyle: Not me, I’m going for the Turkey Sub Sandwich. What about you, Stan?

   Stan: I’m going for the sandwich too, along with their fruit bowl.

   After placing their backpacks into their lockers, they walk their way to their classroom. Walking into the classroom, Stan and his friends do see a lot of recognizable faces such as Butters, Clyde, Jimmy, Craig, Tweek, Token, Timmy, Wendy, and Bebe.

   Butters: Hey, fellas! How’s it going?

   Stan: Well, Cartman here isn’t too happy on being back for now, but the rest of us are pretty happy to be here again.

   Butters: Yeah, I’m pretty happy to see things finally back to normal. I haven’t especially seen your face in person ever since the lockdown began, Stan. Are things going okay with you?

   Stan: Well, I still live in that farm, and I’ve recently learned that my old house got sold by a new family. It’s pretty hard, but I’m trying to get better as the days go by.

   Butters: I’m very sorry to hear about your house, Stan. I only hope that someday there’ll be a way for you to come back into our neighborhood.

   Stan smiling: Thanks, Butters. That means a lot to me.

   As the students were talking to each other, the last one makes her entrance into the classroom. It was Lydia. She takes her seat at a desk that sits close to the door. So far, nobody has noticed her as she takes a quick look at them.

   Lydia in her thought: They all look very friendly people. 

   Cartman: So Craig, have you and Tweek made out with each other during the lockdown?

   Craig annoyed: The fuck, fatty?

   Cartman: May I suggest that you two to find a mistletoe in order to get it started? *laughs hysterically*

   Lydia in her thought: Hmm, maybe expect for the fat one.

   The teacher finally makes his appearance into the classroom. It was Mr. Slave.

   Mr. Slave: Okay, students. Take your seats.

   The students take their seats.

   Mr. Slave: First off, I’m so very grateful to see all of your precious faces back here for the first time in over a year. Things had indeed been very tough for all of us, and I know our memories are still very fresh on the recently events that unfortunately happened in this town. But I’m overall happy to be with you guys again, and I can’t wait to get things back to normal around here.

   Cartman whispering to himself: I doubt it.

   Mr. Slave: Anyway, let me quickly introduced myself. My name is Mr. Slave. I was once an assistant to Mr. Garrison back at South Park Elementary for a short time. But then I eventually broke up with him and later married to Big Gay Al. I started this job about two years ago as this town became more and more tolerate with gay people like myself. This school asked me if I wanted to join in as the first ever openly gay teacher in South Park’s history. I of course gladly took in this job with great passion and honor, and well, here I am today.

   Kyle: But we already know who you are despite of the fact that this is our first day with you as our new teacher.

   Mr. Slave: Yes, yes, I know that a lot you guys know me well by now, but the real reason onto why I’ve done that introduction is because we have a brand new student here from the east coast. Young lady, can you come up to introduce yourself.

   Lydia raises up from her desk as everyone finally sees her for the first time. Stan was looking at her in such huge shock. In his mind, this must be the person that has taken his old room as he remembers that conversation by the couple from last Saturday. A new gothic student into the school. Is she just as much of a huge nonconformist as other goth kids that he knew? He’s very curious to hear from her.

  Lydia: Hello. My name is Lydia Deetz, and I’ve just recently moved here last Saturday from Peaceful Pines Connecticut. Some of my favorite hobbies includes watching horror films, taking photos, and studying bugs. My life is pretty much strange and unusual, and I feel myself as that kind of a person. I however love to enjoy with my life as much as I can, and I can’t wait in getting to know all you. That is all for now.

   Mr. Slave: Thank you, Lydia. I surely can’t wait in getting to know you also.

   Cartman: Oh god, another goth kid into our school.

   Stan: Shut up, Cartman. She just said that she loves enjoying life which means she’s actually a conformist

   Cartman: How do you know?

   Stan: I once hang out with the other goth kids for a brief moment, remember?

   Cartman: Oh, that’s right.

   Mr. Slave: Okay, class, our first section of the day will about early American history. I’ve already place each a book inside you desk before you all came in. Please pick up those books, and then turn to page ten.

   Everyone picking up their books from books, and then turning to page ten.

   Mr. Slave: Good. Now usually a lot of schools start off on studying American history by talking about Christopher Columbus first, but since he’s now a very controversial figure in the public’s eye and we here at this school view him as a monster, we’ll instead be starting off by exploring to when the first Native Americans came into this continent. Let’s get started.

   As Mr. Slave does his teaching, Stan takes a brief moment to check on Lydia. While he is still upset about his old house being sold, he really can’t take any serious grudges against her as it was more likely her parents’ decision in moving to South Park and she was forced to go along with it. She seems to be a very sweet and positive young lady. 

   Stan in his thought: I should really talk to her during lunch and recess.

   A couple hours later, it was now the start of lunch time. Lydia was in the girls bathroom alone washing her hands when all the sudden, Beetlejuice shows up in front of her at the mirror.

   Lydia: Beetlejuice!

   Beetlejuice: Sup, Lyds! I just wanna come by quick to check up on you. How’s the school so far?

   Lydia: I spend much of the morning learning about early American history and algebra in math class.

   Beetlejuice: Algebras?! Take it from me, those things can be a really pain in the ass to learn, and people often don’t remember anything about it later on. My brain at one point literally exploded when someone asked me an algebra question. *the top of his head comes off to show his brain exploding*

   Lydia: Yeah, even the simplest of algebra was a little hard for me.

   Beetlejuice: Have you made any friends yet?

   Lydia: So far, I haven’t talked to any of the students here yet, but I’m about to find out in a few moments.

   Beetlejuice: Good luck to you, Babes. I’ll be on stand by if you ever need me.

   Lydia: I think I’ll be alright, but I appreciate it. See you later.

   As Lydia leaves to get her lunch, Bebe comes in to check on if her hair looks good.

   Bebe: *sigh* The things that I do in order to keep my hair look nice.

   Just as she was about to grab her comb from her pocket, her hair reflection on the mirror turns into a snake hair. Giving Bebe’s reflection on the mirror a Medusa like appearance. Bebe screams, and quickly runs off. The Bebe reflection on the mirror reveals that it was Beetlejuice the entire time.

   Beetlejuice: *laughs hysterically* A good laugh before for the next scene, you know I love it. 

   At the lunch hall, Stan had just taken his seat with his friends. While listening to their conversation, he waits for Lydia to show up.

   Cartman: *smelling his Sloppy Joes* Ah yes, just the way that I like them. *takes a huge bite on his lunch*

   Kyle: You shouldn’t eat that way, Cartman. It’s not really good for your teeth.

   Cartman: Oh, and now you’re finally concerned about the way I eat, huh?

   Kyle: I’m just saying that if you keep eating like that, your jaw bone will lead to serious injuries, and you’ll have to go on a new diet. You’ll have to start eating canned foods.

   Cartman: Yeah, right. Think again, Jew. My jaw bones is just as strong as my big bones.

   Kenny: Dude, just let him have his moment. Without the Sloppy Joes, he’ll be bitching about being at school right now.

   Kyle: *sigh* Whatever.

   Stan finally sees Lydia with her own lunch bag, but she’s being followed by two goth kids.

   Pete: Do you have a moment?

   She turns around to see Pete and Michael in front of her.

   Lydia: Yeah?

   Michael: What type of a goth are you suppose to be?

   Lydia: Excuse me?

   Pete: Are you a goth, emo, vampire? What are you suppose to be?

   Lydia: For your turns, I’m much more like a perky goth. But I prefer calling myself strange and unusual.

  Pete: God damn it! Perky goths are some of the biggest posers of all time.

   Lydia: What’s wrong with being a perky goth?

   Michael: Listen here, the only types of goths around here are the mopey ones. And we’ve never had any other type of goth in this town before. So, you better stay out of our way you fucking dork, or else you’ll really be sorry!

   Stan has never seen the goth kids act this way before. They may not be among the nicest people that he ever met, but they can at least be overall very natural. However, he’s never seen them acting in such a bully attitude. He gets up from his seat and walk towards them as his friends watched him leave in a bit of a confusion.

   Stan: Hey! Why don’t you two just instead leave her alone! As long you don’t bother her, she won’t bother you.

   Everyone in the lunch hall heard Stan’s yelling and all have their eyes staring to the situation.

   Pete: We better leave here, Michael. Everyone is looking at us.

   Michael: Alright, fine. Just keep that perky dork six feet away from us, poser.

   As the two goth kids leave the lunch hall, Stan turns his attention to Lydia.

   Stan: Are you alright?

   Lydia: Yeah, I’m okay. Thanks for driving them away.

   Stan: Those two goths don’t usually act the way that they just did to you. They’re usually very natural with a lot of people despite of their negative views in the world.

   Lydia: I see. They are truly Mopey Goths after all.

   Stan: I’ve known those goth kids for a long time now, but never told me that there were other types of goth aside from themselves.

   Lydia: There are many different types of goths. The general public usually think the mopey kinds as the only type of goth in existence. But there’s also Hippy Goth, Trad Goth, Cabaret Goth, White Goth, and even a Perky Goth like myself.

   Stan: Interesting.

   Lydia: Look them up whenever you can, so that way you’ll know what type of goth you’re looking at next time. Anyway, I gotta eat my lunch. Again, thank you for what you did.

   Stan: Wait a minute. I want to join you for lunch.

   Lydia: Really?

   Stan: Yeah. Since you’re new here and all, I really would like to in getting to know you a little more.

   Lydia smiling: Sure! And I also would like to in getting to know you as well. What’s you name?

   Stan smiling: I’m Stan Marsh. You might‘ve not seen me early this morning, but we do share the same classroom together.

   Lydia: Oh yeah, I’ve seen you while I was introducing myself because of your cute poof ball hat. It really suits you perfectly.

   Stan smiling: Thanks. And I really love your half ponytail hairstyle. I’ve never seen anything like it.

   Lydia smiling: Thank you. I’ll be waiting for you by the end empty corner of the lunch hall, Stan.

   While Lydia head towards to the empty corner, Stan quickly goes back to the table in where his friends were at to grab his lunch.

   Kyle: Wow, Stan. I’ve never seen you interact with a girl like that in ages.

   Cartman: Don’t forget that she now lives in your old house.

   Stan: I know that. I do plan on telling her when the moment is right, but I also really like her attitude. I’m actually looking forward to in getting to know each other with her.

   Kenny: Good luck with her, dude.

   Stan happy: Thanks. *he leaves off*

   Kyle: I haven’t seen Stan this happy in quite a long time. He must be starting to have strong feelings for Lydia.

   Cartman: Great, he’s about to become a hippie goth. *takes another huge bite from his Sloppy Joe and hurts his jaw bone* Ow!

    Kenny Are you okay, Cartman?

     Cartman in pain: No! My jaw bone is in fucking pain right now! I need to see the nurse right away. *he leaves*

   Kyle: I warned him, but yet again, his ego gets the best in him.

   As Stan walks his way to Lydia, Wendy and Bebe were watching from their table. Just like with the rest of the students in the lunch hall, they’ve witnessed the incident scene with the goth kids. However, following from Michael and Pete leaving the scene and everyone returning to their lunch, Wendy and Bebe watched the whole conversation between Stan and Lydia. Although she and Stan have been broken up for a few years and is now dating Bebe, Wendy is very surprised to see her ex-boyfriend having a decent chat with a girl for the first time ever since their separation.

   Bebe: How are you feeling about this, Wendy?

   Wendy: I would never thought that Stan would have another girlfriend in his life time, and he seems to think that way too. But there he is, about to sit next to Lydia. I’m really proud to see him finally starting a new relationship with someone else. I really hope that he dose succeed in her winning her heart no matter how long it’ll take.

   Bebe: Are you going to give Stan any good advice?

   Wendy: I think he’s more than capable in handle it on his own, but I’ll still give him a call to congratulate him. And while we’re on the subject, we should get Lydia into being our friend too. After on what we just saw with her getting threatened by those goth kids, we have to make her feel more welcomed into this school.

   Bebe: Agreed.

      In the next chapter, Stan and Lydia have a long conversation.