#hahaha this is the quickest never mind 🤣🤣

[overnightheartbeats]

As she spoke, a heavy feeling washed over her. Telling him how she felt was not doing anything for her. These last four months, she sometimes pictured sitting him down and just going off on all the frustrations that had been bubbling in her chest. If only to tell someone before she exploded. But, no. His request to hear how she felt had no positive aspect to it. Laurel could see that now, as she met his eyes, meeting the sorrow and heartbreak that weighed on him. Why did she give into his request to share? All this did was hurt him further.

She turned away for just a second, trying to catch her breath before returning her attention to him. “I know that your actions didn’t mean to hurt me. That’s what makes it so fucked up, for me sit here and complain about my feelings when you’re trying to recover from something much bigger than heartache.” Could she not be stronger? Keep this to herself and show that she was unaffected so he didn’t have to worry about her too? The blessing and curse of someone knowing you well. That’s just how Laurel dealt with things though. In her family, ‘going through it’ was only reserved for one person at a time, usually just her parents. If anyone else had problems, it had to wait. So, she quickly adopted that. Push problems down until they went away or were dull enough to forget. Her problems took the backseat each time, they were never as serious as others. This time included. “I didn’t care about you being there for me. On the contrary, I wanted to be the partner you needed, but you decided differently which is..okay. I guess I just wasn’t used to not being by your side, losing you more than once is not easy.I want to be honest with you, but not at the cost of hurting you more.” She reached out to rest her hand over his, her thumb softly brushing his skin. “I’m not sure there is a correct way to deal with it, you did what you had to. I understand that, my heart is just a little slower at catching up.”

"Issac and Aaron would not get along." He immediately went into a small fit of laughter. It quickly faded though as he realized he had also let his friendship with him down. He had a lot to do to repair all the relationships he broke.

He didn't say anything as Laurel went off. Just like he had wanted but it still didn't let him go unscathed. He knew he had hurt her but just how deeply it was now clear. Eli may have died but that also seemed to go for her. He didn't know what to say, what could he say? Sorry didn't cover it. He fucked up and he knew it also seemed a little low to lead with. So, he stared at her. Opting for that choice that had never lied to her before. She'd see how sorry he was, how heartbroken he was at leaving her in the dark when he promised he wouldn't. The feeling in his chest was a weird one to digest.

She was right. When he had come back, it wasn't the same person who took the shot. There was no denying that things changed that day and it left them like scattered puzzle pieces trying to find their corner once again. This was exactly why he wanted them to go to therapy. There was no way he was mending this on his own. To be fair he had no idea where to start. He couldn't heal her when he didn't feel capable of healing himself. He wasn't the partner she needed or deserved. Not right now. "I didn't take the guest room to hurt you. Not an excuse but I couldn't be the partner you needed and while I could have explained that to you then and not left you in the dark, I chose not to and that is what I'll forever try to make up for with you." He shook his head, "it's not being an asshole. You're being honest just like how I asked you to be." He closed his eyes and tried to erase the fact that he died from his mind. "I know I did. I don't know that I'm dealing with it the correct way." Clearly not since he decided Laurel didn't need to be part of the equation. "I don't know that I'm sorry is good enough to cover how I wish I could take it back."

[frodo-with-glasses]

More Reading Thoughts: A Conspiracy Unmasked

Ohohoho here we go >:-D

Merry like “hmm, I can tell something’s fishy about this, but we’ll have to talk about it later”

The Brandybucks being described as “virtually a small independent country” is GreatTM X-D

“…as a matter of fact, [the Bucklanders] were not very different from the other hobbits of the Four Farthings. Except in one point: they were fond of boats, and some of them could swim.”

*Phil Dragash Merry voice intensifies* I LOVE BOATS Y’KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE BOATS SO MUCH I MEAN THEY’RE SO COOL AND BOATY AND THEY FLOAT

Aww, Sam’s already getting a bit homesick :-(

Gollummmm

Frodo: “I mean we already ate, but we could eat again.” Merry: “Say no more, fam”

Frodo seeing Bilbo’s things in the new house and being “sharply reminded” of him :-C Hello it is once again Crying About Frodo and Bilbo O’Clock

BATH SECTION YEAAAAAHHHH

“Which order shall we go in? Eldest first or quickest first? You’ll be last either way, Master Peregrin.” HAHAHA GETTIM FRODO

And Merry like “excuuuuse me, you should know by now that I’m better at planning and logistics than that; there are THREE tubs >8-D”

And Pippin splashing Frodo with the bath water 🤣 This whole section is so stinkin’ CUTE

I, too, cannot properly dry my hair until I am out of the steam in the bathroom. Frodo is the most relatable ever.

Merry has such dad energy 🤣 “You’d better clean up your mess, Pippin, before you get any supper!”

The squabbling over the mushrooms haha

Ooooohh The Talk is here

It honestly makes so much sense that Pippin is the one talking when Frodo refuses to. Frodo is trying to keep secrets, and Pippin has zero filter.

Also Merry reading Frodo like a book is SO GOOD

“You are miserable, because you don’t know how to say good-bye. You meant to leave the Shire, of course. But danger has come on you sooner than you expected, and now you are making up your mind to go at once. And you don’t want to. We are very sorry for you.”

THAT’S MY SMART BOI

I can’t wait to draw this part

“You do not understand! You must go—and therefore we must, too. Merry and I are coming with you. Sam is an excellent fellow, and would jump down a dragon’s throat to save you, if he did not trip over his own feet; but you will need more than one companion in your dangerous adventure.” Awww, Pippin!!

Also the foreshadowing, wow

Hahaha Merry presenting Sam like “TA-DA! Our chief spy!!”

Sam: “Gandalf did say to take someone you could trust, sir!” Frodo: “But I can’t trust anyone, apparently!” Sam: :-C

Oh oh oh it’s this part…!!

“It all depends on what you want. You can trust us to stick to you through thick and thin - to the bitter end. And you can trust us to keep any secret of yours - closer than you can keep it yourself. But you cannot trust us to let you face trouble alone, and go off without a word. We are your friends, Frodo. Anyway: there it is. We know most of what Gandalf has told you. We know a good deal about the Ring. We are horribly afraid - but we are coming with you; or following you like hounds.”

MERRY MY LAD I LOVE YOU TO DEATH

That’s true friendship right there

Frodo like “I am NEVER trusting that you are actually asleep ever again” 🤣

“Three cheers for Captain Frodo and Company!” I’m going to melt 🥹

Merry once again being the G.O.A.T. by having the ponies prepared

“It seems to have been a very efficient conspiracy.” HECK YEAH IT WAS

I love that Fatty has barely talked through the whole chapter except to blurt “NOT THE OLD FOREST” at the very end

Merry continues to have Dad Energy by breaking up the almost-argument between Pippin and Fatty

Oooof the dream about the Sea…