#had to research when and where the game was created and if it made sense

[arklay]

🖊🖊🖊🖊 for diana ofc

a fun little fact about diana is that she wears her watch with the face on the inside of her wrist

while working for umbrella (well, undercover for the rival company, that is), diana's employment was never common knowledge to the public – because why would a pharmaceutical company need a herpetologist? instead, she simply held a position as a researcher at raccoon university, and would occasionally do lectures, but for the most part she would just take the cable car underground to the nest

when diana collaborated with the connections through h.c.f. in the early 2000s, they named one of the d-type bioweapons after her

diana saw a lot of her younger self in sherry when they first met due to the similarities in their situations with their parents, and the way she behaved around both herself and albert. despite her dislike of children, she couldn't help but feel for her and even came to enjoy when she would stay over on occasion (i'd love if my brain would let me finish the rewrite of their first meeting because i touch on all of this in there and diana's thought process ough)

[creatureheart]

Decided to update my "a basic look into the nonhuman identity" post.

All of it is basically the same as the old one, but with a few minor tweaks here and there. =D

All pictures have ALT text included, plain text under the cut.

Nonhuman as an identity: To identify as not human either fully or partially. (hate/trolls will be reported and deleted)

Reminder: These are all personal identities and why someone identifies as nonhuman and what term someone decides to use for themself is exclusively their business. In the end it is what makes the most sense to the individual and not up to others. Now, onto some of the communities that are included under the nonhuman identity:

Nonhuman: To identify as not human either fully or partially. Used both as an umbrella term, and a standalone identity. How specific you get with your identity and what terms you use is entirely up to you. Sometimes "nonhuman" is enough.

Otherkin: from the term "otherkind" - an identity which typically encompasses being wholly or partially a nonhuman entity. Usually understood to cover those who identify as mythical creatures and other fantastical things, but these are not the only things otherkin covers. Also encompasses non-creature/being nonhuman identities.

Examples of non-creature/being based identities: Conceptkin: an identity where one identifies as a concept such as the concept of night or fire. Objectkin: and identity where one identifies as an object. Songkin: an identity where one identifies as a song. Phytanthrope or Plantkin: an identity where one identifies as a plant.

Examples of creature/being based identities: Therianthropy: usually shortened to therian - where one identifies AS a nonhuman animal. Some will say that this term refers to only earthen animals, living or extinct, but it has never only encompassed earthly animals. The community's language came from those who identify as werecreatures.

Theriomythic: an alternate identity term for one who identifies in some intrinsic was as a mythical creature, typically refers to those with animalistic characteristics. Paleotherian: an identity term for one who identifies as a now extinct earthly animal, like a dinosaur or mammoth.

Cladotherian or Cladokin: an identity term for one who does not identify as a distinct species, but a broader identity encompassing an entire genus or larger grouping. Cladomythic: an identity term for one who identifies as a group (clade) of animalistic mythical creatures.

Fictionkin: an identity term that covers all things fictional. For those who identify as something fictional like characters, animals, species, objects, etc. These can be from books, shows, video games, etc, but not always! Original fictional characters and such are also possible. No all those who are fictionkin identify as nonhuman.

There are many other identities that fall under the nonhuman umbrella which is why it's important to do your own research to figure out if a certain term works for you. While these identities are experience mostly involuntarily, the line between voluntary and involuntary can sometimes be incredibly blurry and hard to explain and figure out.

While the already mentioned identities are mostly involuntary, here are some identities that fall under being voluntary. Copinglink or Otherlink: an identity where one voluntarily identifies as nonhuman. Able to be changed as need dictates. This could be for a number of reasons, some examples being simply wanting to identify as nonhuman or as a consciously created coping mechanism. Copinglink was coined by Who-is-page, who made an official definition post in 2016, the definition detailing that the term is for all that want to take on a voluntary nonhuman identity, and not just for coping reasons.

A lot of people may also say that it is impossible to become a therian, otherkin, etc. While the identity is mostly involuntary, things like trauma and neurodivergence can cause an individual to take on a nonhuman identity when they had not had one previously.

Most will usually see people explain that these identities are spiritual or psychological, but these are only some of the ways that individuals may experience them. Some other experiences of nonhumanity: Symbolic, Metaphorical, Ancestral, Physical (Yes this is an actual reason for some and they are just as much a part of the community as anyone else. Physical and Ancestral nonhumans are part of the community's history and some of its founders.)

For those looking for more information, and community places, here are some places to check out! Werelist, Nonhuman National Park, Alterhuman Archive, The Chimera's Library. The above are forums and archives of information on the community. Most archived information is thanks to who-is-page, liongoatsnake and frameacloud on tumblr.

While this is a brief look into the nonhuman identity that I could share, I do hope it has been helpful in some way. Remember to be true to yourself, and don't let anyone tell you how to feel. Ignore, report, delete and block the haters! Yeen out~

[estellan0vella]

High-Frequency Burst HCs ❀ includes: Gojo, Nanami, Sukuna, Toji, Megumi, Yuji & Toge Same Universe as this

Masterlist

Satoru Gojo

Vigilant Protector: Gojo is always alert and hyper-aware of your condition. He has memorized all your triggers and can predict when a seizure might be coming on. He often reminds you to avoid those triggers, sometimes in a playful yet caring manner.

Preparedness: Gojo keeps a small, stylish bag with all the essentials needed for managing your epilepsy: medication, a bottle of water, a snack, and a soft scarf or small pillow to place under your head if you have a seizure. He carries it everywhere without complaint.

Comfort and Reassurance: Whenever you feel a seizure coming on, Gojo immediately becomes your rock. He holds your hand, looks into your eyes with his usual confidence, and reassures you that everything will be okay. His presence alone is calming.

Aftercare Master: Post-seizure, Gojo is the best at taking care of you. He ensures you're in a safe, comfortable space, brings you water, and speaks softly to you, offering gentle encouragement and letting you rest on his shoulder if needed.

Educational Advocate: Gojo educates everyone around him about epilepsy, from students to fellow sorcerers. He’s passionate about making sure that everyone knows how to help you in case of an emergency and fights against any stigma or misconceptions about your condition. You, Nanami and Shoko have had to stop him from obliterating the higher ups after one of them made a comment that was outright derogatory or snidely questioned you capabilities.

Emotional Support: He’s always there to talk about how you’re feeling, both physically and emotionally. Gojo’s support is unwavering, and he knows just when to crack a joke to lighten the mood or when to offer a comforting silence.

Seizure Safety Measures: Gojo takes precautions around your living space. He ensures that sharp edges are cushioned and that there are soft mats or carpets in areas where you could potentially fall. He does this subtly, so it doesn’t feel intrusive or overly protective.

Medical Management: He insists on attending your medical appointments with you, asking the doctors detailed questions and taking notes. Gojo makes sure he fully understands your treatment plan and medication regimen, so he can help you manage them effectively.

Unyielding Love: Gojo constantly reminds you that your epilepsy does not define you or your relationship. He loves you for who you are, and your condition only strengthens his commitment to you. He often says, "You and I, we’re unstoppable. We're the strongest"

Training Adjustments: During training sessions, Gojo adjusts the intensity and type of exercises to ensure they’re safe for you. He’s incredibly observant and will stop immediately if he senses you’re pushing yourself too hard.

Encouragement and Positivity: Gojo constantly encourages you to pursue your dreams and passions, never letting epilepsy be a limiting factor. He’s your biggest cheerleader, always reminding you of your strength and resilience.

Gentle Reminders: Gojo has a playful yet caring way of reminding you to take your medication. He’ll pop up out of nowhere with your pills in hand, sometimes using his powers to make it a bit of a game to lighten the moment.

Celebrating Small Victories: Gojo makes a big deal out of every small victory, whether it’s a seizure-free day or successfully managing a trigger. He celebrates these moments with you, reinforcing a positive outlook on life and your condition.

Kento Nanami

Understanding and Research: From the moment you share your condition with Nanami, he dives deep into researching epilepsy. He wants to understand every aspect of it to ensure he can support you effectively. His research includes reading medical journals, talking to professionals, and learning about the latest treatments and therapies.

Preparedness: Nanami creates a comprehensive emergency plan. He keeps a list of your medications, doctor’s contact information, and instructions on what to do during a seizure. He has this information on him at all times, and he ensures that his workplace and close friends are also aware of it.

Calm and Collected: During a seizure, Nanami remains incredibly calm. His voice is soothing as he reassures you that everything will be okay. He makes sure you're in a safe position, clears the area of any potential hazards, and times the seizure while keeping track of any details to inform your doctor later.

Routine and Medication Management: Nanami helps you maintain a strict routine, understanding how important it is for managing epilepsy. He reminds you to take your medication on time and even sets up reminders on his phone to ensure neither of you forgets.

Lifestyle Adjustments: He makes lifestyle changes to accommodate your needs, such as reducing stress and ensuring you get enough rest. He avoids places or situations that could trigger your seizures, like extremely bright lights or loud environments, unless you're fully prepared and comfortable.

Support During Recovery: After a seizure, Nanami is there to help you recover. He offers you water, a comforting presence, and whatever else you might need. If you feel disoriented or tired, he’ll sit with you until you feel better, often holding your hand or giving you a reassuring hug.

Emotional Support: He provides unwavering emotional support, encouraging you to talk about your feelings and fears regarding your condition. He listens patiently and offers comforting words, making sure you never feel alone in your journey.

Planning Ahead: When planning trips or outings, Nanami always considers your health first. He researches medical facilities nearby, makes sure your travel insurance covers any potential costs, ensures you have all necessary medications, and plans activities that are safe and enjoyable for you.

Communication: Nanami keeps open lines of communication with your healthcare team. He attends appointments with you, asks questions, and ensures he understands any changes in your treatment plan.

Unwavering Dedication: Above all, Nanami’s dedication to your well-being is unwavering. He makes it clear that your condition does not define you or your relationship. His love and care are constant, providing a stable foundation for you to lean on whenever you need it.

Sukuna

Initial Shock and Curiosity: At first, Sukuna is surprised and a bit confused when he witnesses your first seizure. He’s not used to seeing anyone, let alone someone he cares about, in such a vulnerable state.

Research and Learning: Despite his initial reaction, Sukuna takes it upon himself to learn about epilepsy. He dives into ancient texts and modern information, wanting to understand exactly what you’re going through.

Practical Knowledge: He quickly learns the importance of staying calm during your seizures. He educates himself on the best ways to keep you safe during a tonic-clonic episode, such as moving objects out of the way and timing the seizure.

Monitoring Your Health: Sukuna becomes very attuned to your health. He can sense when you’re feeling off and makes sure you’re taking your medication regularly. He’s not overly protective but definitely ALWAYS keeps a close eye on you.

Strength and Reassurance: Sukuna provides a strong, unwavering presence during your seizures. He holds your hand, talks to you calmly, and reassures you that you’ll be okay. His confidence is a source of comfort for you.

Post-Seizure Care: After a seizure, Sukuna is incredibly gentle. He helps you rest and recover, ensuring you have water, a cool cloth for your forehead, and whatever else you might need to feel comfortable.

Understanding and Patience: Sukuna is surprisingly patient with you. He understands that seizures can take a toll on you mentally and physically, and he never makes you feel guilty or burdensome for having them.

Respecting Boundaries: Sukuna respects your boundaries and never pushes you to do things that might trigger a seizure. He’s understanding when you need to rest or take a break from activities.

Encouraging Independence: While Sukuna is always there to support you, he encourages your independence. He respects your strength and capabilities and supports you in living a full and active life.

Toji Fushiguro

Always Vigilant: Toji is always on high alert when you're out together. He watches for any signs that you might be about to have a seizure, even in busy and chaotic environments.

Learned All About It: As soon as you told Toji about your epilepsy, he dove into research (much to Shiu's shock). He knows the difference between various types of seizures, how to provide first aid during a seizure, and what your specific triggers might be.

Prepared for Anything: Toji always carries a small emergency kit for you. It includes your medication, a list of your triggers, and instructions for anyone who might need to help if he’s not around.

Recognizes the Signs: Toji has become adept at recognizing the subtle signs that you might be about to have a seizure. Whether it’s a slight change in your behavior or a look in your eyes, he’s quick to notice and act accordingly.

Calm Under Pressure: During a seizure, Toji remains calm and collected. He makes sure you're safe from harm, talking to you soothingly as he ensures you're in a safe position until the seizure passes.

Post-Seizure Care: After a seizure, Toji is incredibly gentle and attentive. He helps you reorient, offers you water, and makes sure you’re comfortable. He knows that you might feel confused or exhausted and handles you with care.

Adjusts Plans Easily: Toji is flexible with plans, always ready to adapt if you’re not feeling up to something or if a seizure happens. He never makes you feel guilty for needing to change or cancel plans.

Nighttime Vigilance: At night, Toji sometimes wakes up to check on you out of instinct, ensuring you’re okay and not experiencing any nocturnal seizures. If he notices anything amiss, he’s quick to act.

Affectionate Reassurance: Toji constantly reassures you of his love and support, often through small gestures like holding your hand, a gentle kiss on the forehead, or a warm embrace, making sure you never feel alone in your journey with epilepsy.

Megumi Fushiguro

Research and Preparation: From the moment you told Megumi about your epilepsy, he began researching everything about it. He read medical articles, watched videos, and even reached out to Shoko to ensure he understood what you go through. His thoroughness was his way of showing he cares deeply about your well-being.

Gentle Reminders: Though he’s not overly expressive, Megumi makes sure you take your medication on time. He’ll set reminders on his phone and give you a gentle nudge if you forget. It’s his quiet way of looking out for you.

Seizure Response: When a seizure does happen, Megumi remains calm and composed. He makes sure you're safe, turning you on your side and cushioning your head. He’ll time the seizure and talk to you soothingly, reassuring you as you come out of it. His voice is a constant anchor, steady and reliable.

Post-Seizure Care: After a seizure, Megumi is incredibly attentive. He’ll get you water, make sure you didn't get injured during the seizure, and help massage your aching muscles. He’s patient and understanding, never making you feel like a burden.

Lifestyle Adjustments: Megumi subtly adjusts plans and activities to accommodate your condition. He avoids places which may have potential triggers, and he’s always willing to leave early if you’re feeling unwell. He prioritizes your comfort and safety without making a big deal out of it.

Emotional Support: While Megumi may not be the most verbally expressive, his actions speak volumes. He’s a great listener, offering a shoulder to lean on during tough times. He’ll hold your hand and offer a quiet presence, letting you know he’s there for you.

Training and Preparedness: Megumi teaches his shikigami to recognize the signs of an impending seizure, ensuring they can alert him if something happens while he’s not directly by your side.

Subtle Affection: Megumi’s affection is often shown through small, thoughtful gestures. He’ll bring you your favorite snacks, drape a blanket over you when you’re cold, or leave a sweet note in your bag. These little acts of love remind you that you’re always on his mind.

Yuji Itadori

Routine and Stability: Yuji helps you maintain a stable routine to minimize seizure triggers. He’s diligent about ensuring you get enough sleep, eat regularly, and avoid known triggers. He’s even willing to adjust his own habits to support your health.

Social Awareness: Yuji educates his friends and classmates about your condition. He wants them to understand and be supportive, creating a more inclusive environment for you. He even holds a small meeting with the Jujutsu Sorcerers to explain what they should do if you have a seizure.

Creating a Safe Space: Yuji helps you set up a safe and comfortable environment at home. He ensures there are soft mats and pillows in areas where you spend a lot of time, reducing the risk of injury during a seizure.

Encouragement and Positivity: Yuji is your biggest cheerleader. He encourages you to pursue your passions and dreams despite your condition. "You’re amazing, and nothing can stop you," he says, his words filled with conviction.

Physical and Emotional Support: On tough days, when the seizures leave you drained, Yuji is there to offer physical and emotional support. He holds you close, whispers comforting words, and sometimes just sits with you in silence, letting his presence speak volumes.

Adapting and Growing: As time goes on, Yuji adapts to your needs seamlessly. He learns to recognize subtle signs that a seizure might be coming and helps you prepare. Your relationship grows stronger with each challenge you face together.

Humour and Light-hearted Moments: Despite the seriousness of your condition, Yuji finds ways to bring humour into your lives. He makes funny faces, tells jokes, and does silly dances to lift your spirits. His laughter is infectious, and you can’t help but smile.

Toge Inumaki

Understanding and Supportive: Toge is incredibly understanding and supportive. From the moment you told him about your epilepsy, he took it upon himself to learn everything he could about the condition. He’s always reading up on the latest information and asking your doctor questions to make sure he can support you in the best way possible.

Routine Checks: He’s very observant and attentive to your needs. Toge often checks in with you throughout the day, making sure you’ve taken your medication and had enough rest. He’s always discreet about it, so you never feel like he’s hovering.

Seizure Safety: Toge makes small adjustments to your living space to ensure it’s safe for you. He pads sharp corners, keeps the floors clutter-free, and always makes sure you’re in a safe position if you feel a seizure coming on. His protective nature shines through in these thoughtful gestures.

Silent Communication: Understanding that his curse speech can be dangerous, Toge finds creative ways to communicate during your seizures. He uses hand signals, text messages, or even writes notes to ensure he’s giving you the support you need without risking any harm.

Calming Presence: Toge’s presence is incredibly calming. His quiet strength and gentle demeanor help to soothe your anxiety, especially when you’re feeling the aftereffects of a seizure. He’s always there to hold your hand and remind you that you’re not alone.

Celebrating Milestones: Toge celebrates every milestone with you, no matter how small. Whether it’s a seizure-free day, week, or month, he’s always ready to celebrate your victories, reinforcing his unwavering belief in your strength.

Emotional Support: When you feel frustrated or disheartened by your condition, Toge is there to listen and provide emotional support. He’s a comforting presence, always ready to offer a shoulder to lean on and words of encouragement, even if they’re simple phrases.

Special Signals: You two develop special signals or gestures to indicate how you’re feeling. A simple squeeze of the hand or a particular look can convey your needs, ensuring you always feel understood without needing to say a word.

Self-Care Reminders: Toge gently reminds you to take care of yourself, encouraging you to rest, hydrate, and take your medication. His reminders are always kind and loving, never nagging, making you feel cherished and cared for.

Patient and Understanding: Toge is incredibly patient and understanding during your recovery periods. He never rushes you and always ensures you have the time and space you need to recuperate, offering gentle reassurances that he’s there for you.

Everyday Magic: Despite the challenges, Toge makes every day feel special. His thoughtful gestures, from surprise notes to favorite snacks, remind you that your relationship is filled with love, care, and everyday magic.

(When you're having good days, he definitely sends you videos of people doing the silly salmon challenge with 'You' underneath (if it's been established that you don't mind jokes ofc))

The lil High Frequency Burst Universe is so self-indulgent

[blues824]

Vil, Rook, Jamil with a s/o that is a descendant of Aphrodite!

Reader is not Yuu. Gender-neutral Reader.

Jamil Viper

It was during the sorting ceremony where freshmen got sorted into their dormitories. It was your turn, and as he laid his eyes on you, he was caught under your siren’s spell. His heart beat faster and faster with every moment, but you were then sorted into Pomefiore. It made sense, because you were so beautiful.

During the first basketball game of the season, he saw you in the bleachers. Your gazes met, and it was like time stopped. But he had a game to play. The Vice Housewarden suddenly felt the need to win just for you. And he did.

From that point on, he felt the need to see you more often. He would try his hardest to spend more time with you. He even asked you on a date, and it was a magic carpet ride in the moonlight. The night ended with you placing a kiss on his cheek after he dropped you off back at your dorm.

As much as he doesn’t want to, he has to admit that he is so down bad for you. Each day, he will make you a meal so that you don’t have to deal with long lines. He wants to give you as much as he can so he can make sure that you remain his. 

But, he’s still insecure about his position of servant to Kalim. He doesn’t have any status, and therefore couldn’t give you a life that he thought you deserved. However, you assured him that his status didn’t matter as long as he loved and cherished you as you loved and cherished him.

Vil Schoenheit

Usually he would be mad if someone was deemed more beautiful than him, but he knew that he would never be able to compare. You were one of the children of Aphrodite, the goddess of love and beauty. But, you had a power that was unlike most of your other siblings.

The two of you were childhood friends, and co-actors. You have starred in many different things, you often being the protagonist’s love interest and him being casted as the villain. However, anyone watching the films could see the chemistry between the two of you on-screen. Even during interviews, there was some tension between you two.

You had the power to give compliments, and have people believe them and fluster them. It has gotten you out of trouble a few times, but you don’t use it in that way on Vil. You use it so that he feels better. You may be beautiful, but he was strong. He was smart. He was beautiful in every possible way.

When you were sorted into his dorm, he had to admit that he was very excited. You also joined the Film Research Club, which gave you more time to be with one another. It took a huge part of the workload off his shoulders because you served as co-president of the club. 

Almost every single day, students flock up to you asking you for an autograph or even a photograph (Cater, I’m looking at you). The one time you both agreed, you made sure to give them a pose that your fans would eat up. He pulled you into his arms and dipped you down, surprising everyone besides himself.

Rook Hunt

He was in charge of introducing the first years to the dormitory during his second year there, and you were in the crowd. He reached out his hand to you in a very romantic manner and kissed the back of it as he introduced himself. However, even though you were not flustered, you were still smiling because of this display of sudden affection.

That very night, the hunter went about creating a poem that took him a few months to perfect. Every waking moment he had to himself, he dedicated it to writing. The concern you showed him when you saw that he was starting to fall asleep in class made him flustered instead.

Bro was questioning this witchcraft. He could never recall a time where someone had made him feel like this. But to him, you were the most beautiful person he had ever laid eyes on, and not just because of your looks. You were smart, cunning, and passionate, qualities that he absolutely adores.

Eventually, in his third year, he was finished with the poem. He invited you to the woods that you both usually strolled together, but it was different. Fairy lights decorated the trees, and you were looking for your hunter when he dropped down from a tree and started serenading you.

Still didn’t fluster you, but you had to admit that this was the most romantic thing someone has done just to confess to you. So, before he had the chance to finish, you placed a kiss on his lips and it promptly shut him up. He was so excited that you accepted his confession, but sad that the poem he spent a long time on went to waste.

[thebomb-thebird-andtheburntbitch]

Mosaic

kaeya/gn!reader

genre: hurt/comfort, teensy angst, fluff

warning(s)!!!: hydro-vision/polearm-user reader (bc i said so), kaeya word vomits all over the place, kaeya also becomes self-aware of feelings and Dislikes that, kaeya also makes some poor choices in leu of those feelings, all is well in the end tho! he learns (and cries) (tayls is pushing the pathetic crybaby kaeya agenda and cannot be stopped)

w.count: 8.7k

synopsis: kaeya is none the wiser to the people around him and what it is they think about him- he didn't get his title of 'top candidate for grandson in law' for nothing. however, he never thought he'd get so swept up in his own feelings that when he does, he decides he has to put a stop to them no matter the cost. but can he really follow through with that?

a/n: i love when tumblr nerfs my banner quality but it's whatever. have some kaeya nonsense (fr take this away from me)

“A mosaic.” 

That was your answer to a question Paimon and the Traveler asks while you were meandering around the Favonius Library looking for a book you needed for some personal research. They had run into you there and a conversation about what some citizens of the City of Freedom embody had sprung up somehow. For example, Paimon was very set on saying that Master Diluc was a rock- set in his ways and tough to budge- and so on from there.  The ideas and objects tossed around were anywhere between insightful and downright silly. 

So, it was inevitable that eventually the trio would cycle around to the Knights. Jean was dubbed a Dandelion according to the Traveler and Lisa was crowned as an elegant bookmark that was so sharp it would cause terrible papercuts. Of course, Lisa’s object was picked ever so gracefully by Paimon even if it didn’t make much sense she was set on her answer, and nothing would change her mind. Then, when the personification of one Kaeya Alberich came around, admittingly the two Outlanders were stumped.  

Kaeya would always peruse around with such an air of mystery. Keeping important aspects of himself tucked so far away that very few people knew of his secrets- and they were tight lipped for their own reasons.  His smooth tongue aided him greatly whenever someone would ask about himself personally- spinning tales and weaving verses that got him out of any sort of personal interrogation. 

The trio knew if they asked Diluc, he’d give a short and possibly crude answer.  Jean would probably give him some illusion of not being sorted into such games and Lisa would just think you three were adorable and not give her two cents at all. You, however, thought on it for a bit longer and finally had an answer. 

“A mosaic?” Paimon mimicked, making sure her voice was kept down in the sanctuary of books. “Like the artwork?” 

“He is good looking,” Traveler pitched and it was true. Even people with aged or poor working eyes could see Kaeya was far from being an ugly man. 

“I don't see how him being a little ‘good looking’ is deserving of the title of being a piece art!” You chuckle at Paimon’s small fit of confusion. 

“Well, ignoring his looks, a mosaic is a piece of work that is made of small pieces right? It isn’t whole until it’s all put together. Just like a puzzle.” 

“So, he’s a glorified puzzle?” 

“That isn’t what I meant,” you shake your head in a small chuckle. You take a small trip to another corner of the library and run your fingers along the spines of different books before you grab one and easily slide it out of its spot on the shelf.

It’s a book on different types of art. Flipping the pages you find a page with a drawn on copy of a mosaic from another country. You lay it down on a nearby table and tap the drawing with your fingertip. 

“What I meant was the process of becoming a mosaic- how it’s created.” you trace the empty spaces of white on the page where the piece of the drawn on piece were supposed to connect to create a bigger piece. “Various pieces of work all put together to make one big picture. A series of events leading to a grand conclusion of hardwork and patience. Maybe it took a lot of time and work. Sometimes creating such a piece was so frustrating at times you wanted to give up, or maybe sometimes nothing looked right. But, by the end of it all- it couldn’t be anything but a wonderful representation of all those struggles.” 

Paimon floated in awe at your explanation and the Travelers playfully placed their hands on their hips as they looked at you. 

“You sure think highly of Kaeya, don’t you?” 

“It’s that noticeable, huh?” You chuckle a tad embarrassed. Your long-standing puppy-crush on Kaeya you’ve had since you met him wasn’t always the best hidden secret. In fact, you were almost positive that the Cavalry Captain himself knew you had a thing for him, but you were happy he never cornered you about it. 

“You’re a love-struck citizen alright,” Paimon rushed to the Traveler’s side in making slight jests at you. You shut the book you had used to try and explain your choice of object and rubbed the back of your neck as you ignore the warmth in your face. 

“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” You turn on your heel and walk back to the shelf to replace the book. Paimon had cupped a small hand around her chin before she was floating over to your side and asking you another question. 

“So, if Kaeya is a mosaic, then who’s his artist?” You look at her and blink a few times, processing what she was asking. You didn’t expect a question like that.  You cup your own chin in thought and after a moment, you laugh at being caught off guard.  

“I hadn’t thought of that.  I guess maybe Mondstadt itself? It is where all his friends and family are after all. Oh, and his job of course.” 

“That makes sense,” Paimon muses, seemingly satisfied with your answer. The conversation had moved from the shelves to the open space of the library and soon out the doors. As the three of you left, the topic of objects to people shifted to one of getting some food into Paimon’s ever empty stomach. 

The book you had previously replaced back on the shelf was easily slid back out by a hand adorning open finger gloves. Taking a relaxed seat at a nearby table, he flipped to the very page you had been on before and looked at the image himself with a small huff that twisted into a quirk of his lips. 

“How interesting,” he muses before reading the whole installment about that specific piece of art. After all, how could he not? 

The next morning was quick to roll around. After a hearty meal at the Good Hunter and pleasant good nights exchanged with the Traveler and Paimon, you were more than ready to head back home to rest. After a swift debrief on the commissions set aside for you today, you move out of the way and off to the side so you could flip through the four pages of individual commission information. 

A typical site clearing of hilicurls, a balloon transport, and two other sites said to be infested with abyss mages and mitacurls. Taking a deep breath and letting it out in the form of a heavy sigh, you roll your neck and shoulders. It looked to be a very physical day, considering the commissions alone were already enough, they were hardly close in range to each other.  

“My, what does this sunny morning lack that is making your shoulder’s slack so much,” the familiar voice of the ever lingering person on your mind spoke. Lowering your commissions and offering him a greeting smile, you watch as Kaeya marches his way down the stone steps of Mondstadt to you. 

“The weather has nothing to do with it, I'll have you know.” When he finally gets to your sides, he silently offers his hand out for your daily commission sheets. You hand them over and resume your small effort of stretching. His eyes quickly scan sheet after sheet before he’s clicking his teeth and shaking his head.  

“Having your run all the way to Stormbearer, to Windrise, down to Springvale and then back up to Wolvendom is just cruel.” The way his voice has that familiar lithe to it, you knew he only half meant what he said. 

“Maybe I’ll get lucky and run into the Traveler who can do me a favor by hitching me a ride on a Waypoint.” You quickly take your commissions back and fold them down twice before storing them away in your pack. Watching the sun’s orange morning hue fade into its daylight yellow was tell enough that you had to get moving or else you’d be rushing to get your work done. Kaeya walked you to the city gate and even across the bridge before you were ready to set off.  

This is practically routine. You weren’t sure when it started, but at some point, Kaeya had started meeting you at the Adventurer’s Guild after receiving your daily commissions and would insist on escorting you out of the city. He claimed it was on the way of his morning walk to stretch his legs, but you weren’t sure how much you believed him. You allowed him to do it anyway since it always set up a good start to your day. 

Getting a small amount of Kaeya’s time was something you would relish since you never wanted to impede on his busy schedule with the Knights. It was the small selfish part of you that wanted to capitalize on this so-called ‘alone’ time that lasted only a small piece of the day. 

“Be careful,” Kaeya always tell you and you always nod back to him a simple ‘I will’ before he would watch you disappear down the worn, dirt paths. Your first destination would be Stormbearer Mountain it appears. 

Most of Kaeya’s morning consisted of going over documents shoved on him courtesy of his position as one of the ten Captains within the knight’s ranks.  With sighs echoing in his private workspace every few minutes and multiple tempting ideas of sneaking out without even processing the paperwork, he finally finished and approved the last document before placing it in a file on his desk that Jean would surely come and snag from him later. 

Leaning back in his chair that would soon need the cushions replaced, he craned his neck to gaze out the tall window in his office.  The sun was much higher in the sky than it was when he had arrived earlier that morning.  His thoughts easily drifted to you and a frown found its way onto his lips. 

“Are you doing alright?” Kaeya delicately asked to the air of solitude around him.  You were more than capable to handle yourself.  In truth, if you weren’t already associated with the Guild and kept so busy by them, Jean probably would’ve scouted you for the Knights instead.  ‘Your skills are impressive, and the others could learn a lot from you’, that’s probably what Jean’s pitch would be. All true of course, sometimes the job of trying to train the lower ranking knights was more of a chore than a duty, once Kaeya would often get stuck with.

He'd be more than happy to spar with you instead any day.  

Steering his gaze away from the window and moving it towards the ceiling, he traced the wooden beams above him with his single visible eye. He sighed again- this time not because of his now finished paperwork. 

“Surely, they’d be in Windrise by now… right?” His fingers drummed against the arm of his chair before he was bringing his chin back down to lock onto his office door.  His paperwork was done, so maybe…

Two knocks rapped against the thick door and Kaeya’s posture straightened out of habit. A muffled ‘Captain?’ heard behind it.  He let his head sink as a small, defeated breath left his open mouth before correcting himself again. 

“You can come in,” he answered.  Guess his plans to sneak away were once again foiled. 

By the time Kaeya made it out of HQ it was already late into the afternoon.  Stretching after stepping foot out of the large entrance, he stepped down the short set of stone steps before making his way towards the front of the city.  You must be back now, or close to the city at the very least.  It had been almost the whole day, if you weren’t back yet he’d simply go on an unprompted adventure to ‘bump into you’. Luckily, there you were; standing in front of the Guild and talking to Katheryne once again. Although, the look of you was less than encouraging. 

While you yourself seemed more or less fine, just from the distance between the top set of steps by Good Hunter to you at the Adventurer's Guild Reception, he could tell your commissions had worn you out today. It was no wonder considering the distance between them. Your clothes had clearly been fixed prior to you reentering the city since the dirt and stains on them were a clear indicator that you had your fair share of roughing up. 

Kaeya can, and did mostly, dismiss this all, however.  It was the serious look on Katheryne’s face and the way yours didn't show relief after a hard day's work like it normally would be. He started making his way towards you and started catching bits of the conversion you both were having. 

“I deeply apologize, y/n, but it’s an Emergency Commission we just received.” The way Katheryne’s voice was coated in tension made Kaeya’s pace harden. When he had arrived at your side, his hand came up to rest on your back without his notice as he looked at the way you held your head in your hand like you were preventing an oncoming headache. 

“What’s the problem?” Kaeya made it a point to look at you- directing the question at you and not Katheryne. Your hand dropped and you sighed with a shake of your head before looking at him. 

“It’s nothing, just a last-minute Commission.”

“What? You just got back from your commissions, didn’t you?” 

“It’s an Emergency. I can’t just brush it off.” 

“Make someone else take it then.” 

“No one else is available.” 

“y/n.” 

“Kaeya.” 

The small verbal battle you both engaged in was empty and Kaeya knew he was playing a losing game. He let out a sigh before he finally turned to look at Katheryne who must have all the patience in the world for standing by and letting you both bicker until she was needed for something. 

“What is the commission exactly?” 

“Apparently, a Ruin Guard has been spotted near Springvale after a passing Adventurer accidentally triggered its detection sensors. The nearby residents are frightened it could march into someone’s territory and wreak havoc there.” 

Kaeya pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand- the other still mindlessly resting on your back- as he sighed.  This is indeed something that couldn’t be pushed off for someone else to take. When it comes to those old machines, who knows what could happen if they aren’t swiftly deactivated. The Captain was at an impasse; letting you go after already being exhausted from running around all day or tying you to one of the Guild’s posts and keeping you there until someone else passed by that Katheryne could snag instead. 

“Fine,” Kaeya relented.  His hand finally dropped from your back and crossed with his other arm over his chest. “I shall accompany you then.” He saw you open your mouth- probably to protest- but he didn’t let you. “Ah-ah,” he tutted at you, “no arguments. Let’s get moving.” He uncrosses his arms to grab your shoulders, spin you around and lightly push you to get your legs moving. 

Luckily, Kaeya’s vision was extra compatible with your own. While your fight styles were different, the fact you had a hydro vision was very much a blessing. It was quiet easy work taking down a Ruin Guard that had been drenched in water then subsequently frozen. After picking up a few dropped items from the timeless machine, Kaeya had stood up and placed his hands on his hips as if proud of himself. 

“Aren’t you happy I decided to tag along now? We made quick work of that Ruin Guard.” 

You can only roll your eyes at the smoothtalker.  Still, you quietly laugh at his antics all the same. Finally calling it a day in the middle of the field you had previously battled in with him, you lay down on the grass.  You were already covered in sweat, dirt and other stains from your earlier commissions, so getting a little more on your clothes wasn’t a concern. You shut your eyes and took in the breeze you silently thanked Lord Barbatos for as you took in a deep breath, letting yourself decompress. 

Kaeya stood over you, moving so his boots were on either side of your head and he was looking down at your relaxing face.  With your eyes closed, you didn’t get to see the smile that was only ever present when you weren’t looking.  The moment your eyes would open, you would only see his normal everyday grin. And open your eye did and oh how lovely they were. The evening glow did wonders for their color. 

Evening. Yes, it is getting rather late now. 

“Are you ready to head back now?” He asked and you nod. Sitting up, Kaeya offers to carry you back to the city on his back- which you decline. That didn’t stop the fact that you reentered Mondstadt securely resting on Kaeya’s back as he held you up with a slight bend to his posture and firm grip on your legs. 

This routine would continue for as long as Kaeya’s luck would allow.  He’d be the first to see you in the mornings before being the one to walk you out of the city and if he was lucky, he’d be the first to greet you back (not including Katheryn). 

If Kaeya was lucky he would greet you back into the city and spend more time at your side.  Reporting in with you to the Guild. Running a few errands like stopping by to purchase things from Blanche or getting your polearm enhanced or repaired at the smith. 

If Kaeya was lucky, he would persuade you into getting dinner with him or dropping by the Cat’s Tail for some casual TCG matches when he was off duty. 

If Kaeya was lucky, the conversation between you both would be flowing well enough that even if there was nothing left to do, he’d be privileged enough to walk you home or come inside to continue occupying your time until you fall asleep or push him out the door saying that he had to get up for work in the morning. 

Today was not Kaeya’s lucky day.  When he got up this morning, his routine to finding you was practically ingrained in his muscles and when he didn’t see you at the stone steps, city gates or the Guild’s reception, confusion crossed his brows.  He casually took a seat on one of the nearby outside stools by the Cat’s Tail and waited until the time to clock in at HQ was growing closer.  With hesitation, he got up and looked around for you once more just to see if maybe he could at least catch a glimpse of you rushing around to get a (rather late) start to the day. 

He was antsy all day and he was astonished to find out that throwing a wrench in his morning threw off his day so much. Kaeya knew that seeing you first thing in the morning was quite a lovely way to start his day, but he didn’t know the extent in which it could affect the rest of it.  Not exchanging a good morning with you or even saying his usual ‘be safe’ message at the edge of Mondstadt nagged at him.  

Currently, he was sitting in a remote corner of the Favonious library, legs crossed as his rear was sat towards the front of the seat to make up for the fact his back was bent over the back of it.  He rests a flimsy, paperback book over his face, the pages scent of old paper and ink invaded his nose and the feeling of them rubbed against his cheeks. One of his hands held it open with his thumb and pinky and the other arm was hanging uselessly at his side, his wrist bouncing against his vision from time to time just for something to interact with. 

Underneath the book, his eye was closed.  He had tried reading the passages in this particular book at least four times now, but the words just weren’t registering in his mind, so he had given up. He was left listless; certain he could easily fall asleep in this very position at any given time. Of course, it wasn’t often that Captain Kaeya would get much quiet time to himself anyways. 

“Uh, what are you doing?” The voice of Paimon made Kaeya’s eye open under the book before he was pulling it down his face enough to only reveal that one eye.  Seeing Paimon floating at the Traveler’s side made him slip the book off his face completely and shut it before setting it on the table in front of him. His posture was corrected as he sat up straighter and rolled his neck. 

“Couldn't you tell? I was reading.” 

“Paimon think’s you were slacking off.” 

“Is that what it looked like?” He jokes as he pushes his chair back and stands up properly before placing one of his hands on his hips. “I would never be caught slacking off, you wound me.” 

“We’ve heard that before,” Paimon sighs with a shake of her head.  In the moment, Kaeya is reminded of the conversation he overheard before between you and the other two. The same time of day, the same location, the same two participants of that conversation. 

“Say,” he says to gain both of their attention, “what do you think it is?” Kaeya’s exceptionally broad and unprecedented question left the two Outlanders confused. The way the Captain could almost see materialized question marks float around their heads was comical before he elaborated. “I’m asking about my artist, of course. Surely you must have your own idea, no?” 

Both Traveler and Paimon’s mouth opened in shock.  

“You were listening?!” Paimon shrieks before she is shushed by other people in the library for her volume. 

“It’s rude to eavesdrop, Kaeya,” Traveler tells him as they cross their arms over their chest.  Kaeya fakes a gasp before shaking his head and shrugging with his arms up. 

“Eavesdropping? Why, I’d never.” He dropped his arms back to his sides. “I was simply in the area and didn’t want to interrupt such a compelling conversation topic. That would’ve been quite rude of me, wouldn’t you agree?” The looks he received were easily brushed off. “Anyway, you didn’t answer my question.” 

“Well,” Paimon started, “didn’t y/n say it would be Mondstadt?” 

“And? Do you agree with them?” 

“Paimon doesn’t see a reason why not,” she shrugs in the air. 

“I see,” Kaeya’s arm crosses over his chest before he’s resting his opposite elbow on it to cup his chin. His gaze shifts downward before he's blinking slowly, meaningfully. “I suppose I could give you half marks.” 

“Half marks?!” Paimon whispers. 

“What about ‘the people of Mondstadt?’” The Traveler interjects.  Kaeya’s eye shoots back to them and his hand drops from his chin to resume a casual stance. 

“That assumption is largely correct as well.” The smile he gives the two gives nothing away. It wasn’t clear if he was sincere about what he said or if he was just saying it to hear himself talk. “A mosaic is usually a large piece, yes? It would make sense for there to be multiple people taking part in such a project at some point I suppose.” 

“You suppose? You’re just running us in circles here!” 

“I don’t know what you mean,” Kaeya deflects with a lighthearted tone and short laugh. 

“Fine! We get it!” Paimon huffs before the conversation devolves into little to nothing until he is parting ways with the two, leaving the library and ready to end the day that seemed to have lasted longer than usual. Despite having a rather lax day, he felt lethargic. 

Yet, despite his lethargy, when he finally made it out of his day clothes and into his bed, all he could do was lay on top of his covers and stare at the ceiling. His eyepatch had been removed- just as always when he was in the confines of his home- and his long bangs covered the eye that was always so accustomed to the darkness.  One of his legs was propped up on the mattress with the other stretched out and his arms were folded behind his head. 

His mind was curious about a number of things all the time- so his racing thoughts weren’t unknown to him. Still, the nagging feeling in the back of his mind didn’t let up. Was not seeing you at all really that much of a clog in his daily life? It made him feel so off-set and that alone was enough to plant a seed of anxiety in his chest. 

Kaeya sighs to himself and his ceiling before rolling to his side and letting his bangs slip across his face and reveal his always concealed eye between the blue strands. He closes his eyes and wills his mind to stop dwelling on menial things. 

Heart and mind are difficult things to cooperate with one another though. 

Kaeya Alberich couldn’t risk getting mixed up in too many personal things- it made his future even more murky and daunting than it already was.  

After that one day of missing seeing you out before your commission, Kaeya tried to do it less on purpose. Maybe that was a message from the gods themselves that he needed to take a step back. If your very presence could affect his day to day life like it had, he needed to back off for his sake and yours. And while he didn’t see you off, he still would welcome you back any chance he saw you return to the city with a raised hand he would immediately tuck away again. 

“I didn’t do anything to make you upset, did I?” Of course, you had noticed his sudden shift in nature. 

“Of course not,” he tells you as sincerely as he could. His smile was strained on his lips and his nose felt like twitching from the sheer effort it took just to pull them up. From the unamused look you gave him at his answer, he knew you knew he wasn’t being completely truthful. Still, you just looked away from him and sighed. Kaeya was grateful you didn’t push the issue because a part of him was sure if you had, he would’ve spilled his guts about things he wasn’t sure of himself just yet. 

The process of slowly taking steps away from you wasn’t pleasant for either party. Kaeya’s days had devolved into nothing but more boring paperwork and patrols he could do with his eye closed, and that would mean seeing nothing at all. The dull lag of the daytime was boring to him with nothing to do between his job and downtime he suddenly had. The Angels Share's atmosphere was a welcome comfort to his new, unpleasant routine- though, he could do without the looks from Diluc.

Meanwhile, you had felt the sting of dejection in your chest. You had come to the assumption that maybe Kaeya had finally taken action on your unspoken feelings for him and was politely telling you to take a hike. It was logical to you; a common everyday Adventurer probably couldn’t make it work out with one of the Knights’ Captains. His previous time spent with you was probably just a hindrance, a distraction from his real work, so this was good. He could focus on what was important, protecting Mondstadt. 

Though, that mental pep talk didn’t make it hurt any less. 

Just like Kaeya, you decided to bury yourself in your work. Taking commissions on top of any other field requests. Clearing hilicurl camps wasn’t something difficult and while the occasional Abyss Mage was a pain, it was all manageable. So, when your back to back jobs kept you out of the city for days at a time, that slowly became the norm for the citizens of Mondstadt. 

It was only natural for no one to notice. 

“Has it really been that long?!” Kaeya had been passing through the central square of Mondstadt when he heard the familiar shrill of Paimon. His interest took little to be piqued and he easily strut his way over. “And no one has tried looking for them yet?” Paimon and the Traveler were stuck in a conversation with Katheryne as is the norm for them nowadays when their travels bring them back to the City of Freedom. “Oohhh,” Paimon worries, “Paimon’s worried.” 

“What’s the problem,” Kaeya interjects into the conversation. All eyes shift to him, his easy strides coming to a stop when he fully joins the group with his arms crossing over his chest. “My, what’s with all the long faces?” 

“Kaeya!” Paimon screeches. “Oh, maybe you’ll know! Have you seen y/n around?” Kaeya’s chest tightens. 

“Y/n? I’m afraid we’ve both been too wrapped up in our own duties recently. Sorry to disappoint.” The slight light of hope Paimon dawned dimmed and worry once again took over her features. The tension in his chest felt tighter, like a white-hot coil was entangling itself around his insides and replacing his ribcage. “Has something happened?” He asks slowly, making quite sure his voice doesn’t crack or waver. All his hard work to distance himself from you can’t unravel now; not when you aren’t even here. 

“We aren’t sure,” Katheryne fills in.  All eyes look to her as she repeats what she had just told the duo before Kaeya arrived. “Y/n had taken a rather dangerous commission the other day. It was a job that required them to explore and investigate some ruins that had been discovered behind a wall of rocks on Stormbearer. The commission should’ve well run its course by now, but we haven’t heard back from either the client or y/n, so some of us are beginning to worry.” 

Kaeya’s fists clenched, but no one took notice of them under his cross-armed stance. He made sure to keep his face from giving himself away. 

“Have you made the issue known to the Acting Grand Master?” He questions. Katheryne shakes her head. 

“No, we haven’t. We had had planned on bringing it to her attention if y/n still doesn’t get in touch with us by this evening.” 

“We should let Jean know right now!” Paimon insists and the Traveler easily nods in agreement. “What if they’re stuck in the ruins. Or- or hurt or something!” Paimon’s worry bleeds easily into her words like a fresh wound into water. 

“The last thing we should do is panic,” Kaeya said hypocritically. His gut felt like a boiling cauldron with panic as the main ingredient. Still, his many years of being persuasive and aloof didn’t let any of that show. 

Though, the off hand look the Traveler shot him made him doubt himself; they’ve been awfully diligent when it comes to reading him ever since his wild goose chase he sent them on not long after they arrived in Mondstadt. Or maybe it was just because they had more experience than he initially thought. Still, it almost made him squirm. 

“Well, we’re going to go tell Jean!” Paimon declared, her small hands on her hips as she bobbed up and down in the air. Kaeya just shrugs indifferently, surely not making any moves to oppose them. With a small huff, Paimon and the Traveler take off towards the Knights Headquarters. When they were well out of earshot and sight, Kaeya’s cross arms drop and his gaze moves to the ever-open gate that showed the wilds outside of Mondstadt. 

“Katheryne,” he almost whispers. “You said Stormbearer?” 

Your vision was blurred when you opened your eyes from your, albeit useless, slumber. You had long since tucked yourself between a small alcove of debris and rock in the ruins you had agreed to investigate. Had you known the person who had commissioned this job was some ruin machine-obsessed loon, you wouldn’t had agreed so easily. A couple ruin guards aren’t a big deal, but adding their mechanical brethren- so to speak- on top of a nut job maintaining them the moment you have to step away to recoup, that's when things get tricky. 

Your body had long since grown exhausted from using your Vision by excessively trying not to get killed. Luckily, the mad man only had his madness going for him, so hiding from his view was easy. Staying hidden from the machine’s censors was what worried you, but you had succeeded so far. Because of that very fact, however; you were reluctant to move. Beyond your weary body, hunger and thirst were starting to eat away at you too. 

Having been in hiding with no ample moment to even try fleeing back to the city for additional aid, you had run through what little rations you had. Your gut ached with hunger pains and your throat had never felt dryer, still you weren’t backed up against the preverbal wall so much you threw all caution to the wind. 

Your polearm had remained materialized as you kept it rested against your shoulder for ease of quick use should you require it.  Your vision had never felt heavier from its placement on your person and your hands cramped from how tightly you had gripped your weapon’s staff. You let your head fall back into the rock behind you and let out a silent sigh. 

In truth, you felt more foolish than injured or exhausted. You knew this commission sounded… odd, but you took it anyway. Anything to help distract your mind from the ever cloudy presence of Kaeya- or lack thereof. 

Your small sliver of respite you found in your cove of rock and debris was beginning to quake and crumble… literally. Your eyes you hadn’t realized had dropped back down shoot open and between the crumbling dust that threatened to get into them, you could hear the engines of machines whirring above you. You scramble to get out into the open before your previously, temporary safety could crush you. Though, coming out meant that you would be more vulnerable than you’d prefer. 

The moment your gaze lands on that familiar warm glow of the back of a Ruin Guard, you throw your polearm into its core, coating the blade with water from your Vision without much thought. The guard crackled with electricity as it malfunctioned and was brought to its metallic knees. Sprinting to its back to quickly retrieve your polearm, you made sure to use your Vision to drench its legs and feet just in case it got back up again. Perhaps the moisture would cause it to comically slip and buy you just a bit more time and maybe a chuckle or two. 

It was odd though, aside from the now jagged whirring of the jittering machine in front of you- there was nothing else. No crazed man trying to jump you or sick another random machine of his on you for whatever cause. It was in fact quiet, and that quiet put you on edge. Your brain knew you needed to stay on guard, but the silence was starting to lull your body into a false sense of security you couldn’t trust. 

Still, your mind that had been in fight mode for what should have been days now, had no chance against your weary body. Your grip on your polearm slips and the weapon clatters to the ground just before your knees did and your body slumped rather pathetically afterwards. 

‘If you fall unconscious, you’ll die’,  you mentally scold yourself. Trying to bully yourself into getting back up, keeping your eyes open, keeping your guard up. Still, your mind was beginning to feel as weak as your body. Thoughts swirled together into a mess of intangible words stuck in your mind and your sight was no better.  Perhaps it was your delirium and exhaustion, but your body suddenly grew cold and you vaguely felt goosebumps raise on your skin like winter itself had bloomed in these ruins with you. Among the changes you felt externally, you swore you heard a muffled voice too. 

Perhaps it was the mad man, the one who got you suckered into this stupid job. If it was, he could make quick work of you now since the last of your fight had disappeared taking out that Ruin Ruard core. The warmth you felt on your neck and cheek was the final thing you could mentally register before your body succumbed to its burdens.

‘Odd’, was the first thing that crossed your mind when you found yourself staring blankly up at a well maintained ceiling. You were sure that if you woke up again, and not gotten yourself killed or crushed, you’d be waking up to jagged rocks and mossy walls. So, the well furnished room you now occupied threw you for a loop- which your pounding head didn’t exactly take well. 

The room you were in was familiar, and you were sure you’ve been here before, but your foggy mind couldn’t process where you were.  The bed you were tucked into was soft and comforting, and with a wince the mattress gave when you push yourself to sit up. You were alone in the room and without much thought, you shuffle your legs out from under the blankets thrown over you to place your feet onto the floor and wobble up to your legs with the help of the bedside table acting as a- albeit less than desirable- crutch. 

The door creaking open was almost mistaken by you for the sound of your sore joints straightening out, as humorous as that was to you since you let a brief, lighthearted laugh escape you in a huff. Then, with your sights on the ground, you noticed a shadow casted by light you don't remember being in the room with you before. 

You follow the shadow along the hard floor covered with a single, purple rug until your eyes found a pair of all too familiar boots.  Your aching body starts to feel anxious- a small wave of gooseflesh running across your exposed skin at the idea of Kaeya being in your proximity for the first time in a while. Still, regardless of how you hadn’t been able to squash your silly crush on him or properly prepare yourself for a possible rejection without even confessing- you were no coward. 

With both hands tense on the bedside table, you raise your head to look at the blue haired man who had removed the fur, half-cape from his shoulder.  It was strange seeing how empty his shoulder was without the extra fluff the fur provided. Still, it was nice to see him in his entirety again since it had been a while. The blacklight of the space behind him made it difficult to see his expression since the lights in the room you had woken up in had been turned off presumably for your ease of comfort. 

“It’s been a while,” was the lamest thing that’s come out of your mouth in a while.

Of course it had been, you were both actively avoiding each other and practically the whole of Mondstadt picked up on it. Looking behind his shoulder you could only barely see corners of art pieces on the walls behind him and another rug that ran down the hall behind his heels.  “Kaeya, am I at your house?” You ask, finally realizing where you recognized your surroundings from.  

You’d been in his living room plenty of times visiting, but you had hardly been back in his room unless you were the one tasked with dragging him home from Angels Share and were generous enough to lug his body weight back to his bed. It was a rare occurrence since you were normally one to just dump him on the couch with a blanket and glass of water for his possible next morning hangover. 

Kaeya never graced you with an answer before he was marching into the room. His bootsteps seem louder than usual on his hardwood floors of his enclosed room, but maybe that was just the headache. His hands shoot out to grab your shoulders and turn you towards him, your hands that had been on the wooden night table were effectively removed from its surface and now Kaeya’s grip was the only crutch you had for balance before your brain could full calibrate standing without swaying again. 

“What on Teyvat were you thinking?!” He raised his voice and even in the dimly lit room with only light from the hall flooding in, you could easily see his expressions now. His brow was turned in a frown and his eye clouded with something you couldn’t pinpoint. It was a far cry from his normally suave and dismissive behavior. “Taking an obviously suspicious commission in ruins that hadn’t been officially investigated by the Knights? Seriously, you thought that was smart?!” 

His temper only made your headache worse and in turn soured your already not-so-great mood.  Reaching up to grab his arms like a hook for support, you verbally push back. 

“I think I'm capable of handling things myself, you know? The Guild doesn’t need the Knights’ to babysit them for every little thing, and as a member of the Guild that applies to me too!” 

“Oh yes, so capable you spontaneously disappear for days? Does that sound capable to you?” 

“It does actually because I was handling things just fine by myself, not that it makes a difference to you.” 

“You collapsed next to a Ruin Guard, y/n! What would you have done if it had restarted or if something else would have happened? Magically wake up and jump into battle again, because I have my doubts about that!” 

“What is your problem, Kayea?!” 

“You! You are my problem!” 

Astonished, you scoff before rolling your eyes.  It had been so long since you hashed it out like this with anyone, let alone Kaeya. It didn’t feel good, it made you feel sick to your stomach. Not hearing any retaliations from you, Kaeya guides you by the shoulders back against the edge of the mattress and pushes you to sit down again. You didn’t let yourself release the sigh of relief that you felt now that the weight of your own limbs was lifted- you wouldn’t give the Captain that satisfaction.

You expected him to let go of you, release your shoulders and march out of the room and maybe slam the door for good measure. Or maybe pace around the room before ordering you good enough to argue, so you would be good enough to get out of his hair. Out of the possibilities, the only thing that you predicted right was him releasing your shoulders. 

Kaeya's hands left your shoulders before sliding down your arms and dropping to the mattress edge on either side of you. You were stunned when he dropped to his knees in front of you and the pressure of his forehead resting on your knee felt heavier than anything. Caging you with his arms and using his head as an anchor on your legs he had effectively trapped you. You kept your hands tucked into each other by your stomach, making sure your knuckles wouldn’t brush even a strand of his hair and you could feel the thin strap of his eyepatch leaving an intent on your skin. 

“Kaeya,” you sighed heavily, his name leaving your lips like a weight. 

“I tried,” his muffled voice sounds weak that your gaze softens at the abrupt tone change. “I did. I tried to fix it, but my problem is still you and I can’t do anything about it.” 

“I have no idea what you’re-” 

“Tell me what to do.” His words that interrupt yours cause you to furrow in confusion. 

“What?” 

“Tell me what to do,” he repeats with a strained voice. “I have so many things I need to do, choices but I- I don't want to. So, do it for me.” 

“I still don’t know what you’re talking about. What does all that even mean?” 

“Make me choose you,” he sighs heavily before the hands of his that were placed on the mattress beside you move to lightly grab at your shirt like he was scared to touch you further. As if you’d push him away, scorn him for his actions and inactions alike. “Because I will. I just- I need someone- you, you need to-” His sentences never finish as his breaths become uneven. The hands that grip your shirt tighten to ball the fabric in his fists now. “I’m sorry.” 

Never had you seen Kaeya, the ever debonair Calvary Captain who kept all his secrets stored into his chest, kneel and subsequently crumble like this to anyone- much less to you. Perhaps in the past he never talks about, Diluc had seen him so weak, but that would be where the witness list ends. You lift your hands from your lap and hover them over his hunched body that clung to you like a child; you were unsure if touching him would set him off or if he would recoil from you. Your silence only made his hands that ensnared your shirt tug on the fabric like an anchor keeping a ship from sailing away. 

One of your hands reach to his head and your fingertips breach the blue tresses of his hair. His shoulders tensed and you almost snatched your hand away. 

“Don’t,” he mumbled into your leg. You weren’t sure if he was saying not to touch him or not to pull away. So, you kept your hand half in his hair and unmoving. 

You yelp when the tugging on your shirt flew into a harsh yank. The back of your knees that had previously been resting snug against the edge of the mattress were now well away with the back of your thighs replacing their spot. Closer to sliding right off the bed than comfortably sitting on it, Kaeya’s arms moved to wind around your waist and his face found a new home in your stomach as your arms hovered in the arm like a puppet's dangling from unused strings. 

You could feel the weight of his words fall onto your legs by way of the tears leaving his eyes. You could feel it in the way his shoulders shake and the uneven breaths that warms your lap through his mouth.

“Kaeya,” you softly start, “what has gotten into you? I've never seen you act like this before.” You slowly lower your arms and place your palms on his shoulders gently so as to not startle him; you weren’t going to keep them in the air forever, they’re sore. 

“I’m from Khaenri’ah, you know?” His voice strains as he lets out a pathetic laugh that’s damp with a web forming in his throat. He feels your hands on his shoulders twitch and his grip around you tightens so you have no chance of running from him. 

“Kaeya, what-” 

“My father abandoned me here with the intention of using me as a spy. I’ve only ever told Diluc, but when I did a lot happened and he left, abandoning me too. I don’t care about Khaenri’ah- not anymore- Mondstadt is my home. It’s where my friends are, my brother- even if he will never accept that role again. I can’t leave Mondstadt behind.” 

“I’m sure Diluc doesn’t hate you, not like you think. He just- he’s set in his stubborn ways and isn’t good at communicating.” You decide to speak only on his mention of Diluc, since the new information of the land in which he supposedly hails was still processing in your mind. 

Your previous comparison of Diluc to a rock briefly comes to mind at the mention of his stubbornnes. You nearly laugh at the thought, but now is definitely not the time.

“Please, please, make me choose you. Tell me to, order it of me, I don’t care. Just- don’t make me live without my artist. I can’t risk that again; I can’t take being abandoned again.” 

“Artist? Kaeya, what are you talking about?” You felt like you didn’t understand the words coming out of his mouth. 

There was a bout of silence after your question and the air felt heavy. You know Kaeya heard you, but he was reluctant to answer. Odd, considering the word vomit he had already coughed up in the last several minutes since he came into the room. Your hands start to move and lightly rub his shoulders over onto his neck, silently trying to coax him into talking more. 

“I heard what you said to the Traveler.” You almost roll your eyes because that could be literally anything. Does he know how often you get the chance to actually run into them and Paimon? He is just trying to dodge the question and by habit you lightly swat at his head. A silent, ‘okay smartass’ to keep him going in the right direction. He almost scoffs into your lap for that one. “You called me a mosaic.” Oh. “You told the Traveler that ‘Mondstadt’ is my artist; they said the ‘People of Mondstadt’, but only I know who my artist truly is.” His arms around you twitch and you could almost feel a stitch of pain in your side from how long he's been effectively squeezing you. “My artist is you. It’s just you.” 

The room is engulfed in a silence that feels heavy, yet... somehow also relieving. So much time recently had been the both of you dancing around the issues neither of you wanted to confront and all it took was you getting yourself into potentially mortal danger for days on end for the truth to come out. Kaeya knew you were someone important, but he didn’t realize just how heavy your permanent absence would be to him. Just the thought of possibly finding you in those ruins dead made his throat burn and ache like swallowing a ball of thorns. 

“Kaeya.” 

“I’m not lying,” his voice was strained, filled with fear of being labeled someone worthy of nothing. 

“I wasn’t going to say you are,” the hand that had previously tapped his head now rested on his nest of blue hair. The gentle strokes of your palm against his scalp were soothing as he felt your breath move your stomach against his head. “I don't see why you would lie to me right now.”  There was no doubt in your mind that everything that came out of his mouth was the unadulterated truth. You’ve never seen the suave captain bleed such vulnerability before. 

You didn’t say anything else to him after that. You move your hands to his arms, unwinding yourself from them before pulling him pathetically up onto his own bed. Not even bothering to fix your position, you fall back onto the mattress with your feet hanging off the edge and he easily follows you. From the lighting provided from the hall, you notice his eyepatch string had loosened from all his face hiding and you take it upon yourself to tighten it- securing it back where it belongs. Your fingertips linger around its material for but a moment before sliding down to his cheek.

His eye is brimmed with tears that had stained his skin with tracks and swelling. He also wouldn’t make eye contact with you, and you roll your eyes endearingly at his childish whims. With you both laying sideways on the bed, feet and legs hanging and not even a blanket to cover up with, your thumb run over his skin. Kaeya is quick to reach for and latch his grip delicately onto your wrist to keep it there. 

“‘M sorry,” he mutters again, sounding much more shy than he did before now that his face was in view of your gaze. You smile at him, knowing there was a long and meaningful talk in the near future. 

“I know. Go to sleep.” 

“But I-” 

“Artists' orders,'' you chortle. He just scoffs and offers his own eye roll, but his cheek warms under your palm. His eye closes and he let out a deep breath before taking one back in and repeating. 

“Stay until I open my eyes again.” 

“I will.” 

And you did. 

[rallamajoop]

Mia Winters and the Connections

There are a lot of bad takes on Mia Winters out there, a lot of really irritating shallow misconceptions. But for now, I’m just going to tackle one of the big ones that annoys me the most.

Mia Winters is not a scientist, and it's debatable whether she had any long-term association with the project that created Eveline. She may not have even met Eveline before being assigned to transport her to South America.

Mia’s not any kind of researcher. Her job when she worked at the Connections is laid out clearly in the first document you find within moments of starting the flashback ("Orders"): she’s a member of the Special Operations Division in the English version, or a 'special agent' in the Japanese (特殊工作員, tokushu kousaku-in). The English version also gives Mia the role of 'caretaker', implicitly of Eveline, but there's not much to suggest this is a role extending beyond the bounds of this particular mission (for comparison, the Japanese doesn't mention caretaking at all).

Mia's job is exactly what we see her doing in the game: transporting important assets under cover identities, and running around doing damage control with a machine gun if things go south. She echoes the same in her letter to the Bakers, stating she 'was assigned to transport some important cargo.' Even the 'imprinting protocol' she refers to seems to be mostly part of a transport protocol (going by the very little we ever learn about it), and may not even have been implemented until shortly before they left.

Even in the one photo of her standing with the research team, you might note that Mia and her partner Alan are the only people present not wearing lab coats (and believe me, with how much other photoshopping there is in this photo, Mia would have been wearing a lab coat if they'd wanted her in one). The photo itself is far more of an easter egg than a real plot point anyway, and probably isn't worth reading too much into ‒ I mean, Alan is apparently the director of the Special Operations division, so it makes no sense to assume he's part of this one science team. But if you really want a 'canonical' explanation for this photo, considering Mia and Alan are wearing the same clothes as in the ship flashback, you could reasonably assume it was taken right before Eveline was shipped off to America ‒ a kind of "Let's get one last snapshot of the team together with the transport crew before Eveline goes to South America" deal. It's completely plausible Mia may not even have met Eveline until the same day this was taken.

So where does this 'scientist' nonsense come from? The only source which does call Mia a 'researcher' is a timeline entry in this one RE7 strategy guide which has never been published in English – and it's a good example of why sources like this are usually better treated as pseudo-canon at best. You can find various translations of it online – but you can also buy the whole ebook (which I did), so here's the page where it originally comes up.

And yes, inasmuch as I’m qualified to translate, the line does state that Mia joined the company as a ‘researcher’ (研究員, kenkyuu-in) in 2010. But the same guidebook also refers to her as an operative (工作員) just a couple of pages later, so even the guidebook is hardly consistent.

Charitably, perhaps we could read that Mia was initially hired as some kind of generic, low-level research assistant before being transferred to the special operations division after showing aptitude in that area. But it's more likely that Mia was simply going to be a researcher at some point in the game’s development history, before Capcom changed their minds, and the timeline that made it into the guidebook is just very out of date ‒ it happens. Either way, one line in an inconsistent guide book hardly trumps what actually made it into the games.

I do realise that asking people to pay attention to what's actually in the games over what's repeated in some wiki somewhere (or a gazillion different fanfic) is a big ask for any fandom, but Mia was clearly never a scientist in the game we all played. She still knowingly worked for some really evil people – she doesn’t get to claim innocence here – but the idea she's personally responsible for every bad thing ever done to Eveline is absurd.

FWIW, other details from the guidebook also back up the idea that transporting assets was a major part of Mia’s job. Her bio (above) mentions that she was away from home a lot, something that strained the Winters’ marriage, and that she told people she worked for a ‘trading company’ – a solid cover for a job focused on travel and logistics.

A very little is said about Mia’s relationship with Eveline. The guidebook does mention that the reason Eveline’s so attached to Mia is because Eveline had known her since she was ‘confined to the “mysterious organisation” that created her’, which could be taken to imply she knew Mia well before their trip began, but it's not much to go on. Mia's own feelings on Eveline are described briefly in a caption: “Although Mia found Eveline creepy, she also felt compassion for her lonely situation,” which tracks with how Mia interacts with her in-game. It doesn't track so well with the idea Mia had any real authority over how Eveline was raised or treated, however, and would be perfectly consistent with the idea Mia might not have known her long at all.

The guidebook timeline also tells us that the E-series project begain in 2000, and that Eveline herself was created in "the early 2000s." This doesn't make a whole lot of sense for reasons I've talked about already, but does put Eveline's creation well before 2010, the year the same timeline gives us for when Mia started working at the Connections. Since the guidebook also tells us Mia was 32 in 2017, back in 2000, she would have been all of 15 years old. Whatever Mia's involvement, the project long predates her joining the company.

But the real issue with trying to given Mia any major responsibility for the E-series project is that the lab that created Eveline was located in Europe. Mia, meanwhile, has a driver's license telling us she's from Texas.

The European location for the lab is another detail that gets barely mentioned in the games, though it's mentioned repeatedly in the guidebook, and the Baker Incident Report even puts it specifically in Munich, Germany. Given all we learn in RE8, that location does make a lot of sense, when the mould was found in Eastern Europe, and that Miranda herself was part of the research team (she gets multiple photos and a lab coat, you may note). And even if the lab wasn’t right on Miranda’s doorstep, Munich is a heckuva commute from Texas, or anywhere else in the US. Even if Mia was often away from Ethan for long periods, as her bio implies, how involved could she realistically have been?

I don't want to overstress the idea that it "doesn't make sense" for a special agent from Texas to have been intimately involved in a European research project ‒ making sense has never held back RE lore before. But the idea that Mia was brought in only as a handler for Eveline when she was being moved to America still makes a lot more sense than to suggest the Connections were fine with their star asset’s primary handler going home to the US every other weekend.

There are possibilities between the two extremes, of course: Mia may have had sporadic contact with Eveline before the trip, either regularly or just once or twice. It's easy to assume the 'imprinting protocol' must mean that Mia's been Eveline's primary handler for some time, but heck, maybe it's better read as the opposite ‒ something that can be quickly applied to a new handler or caretaker in a hurry, to explain how Eveline got so attached to someone she'd only just met.

Given everything we actually see of her, you could even speculate that Mia was chosen as Eveline's 'caretaker' specifically because she was someone nice and motherly enough for Eveline to bond with. Eveline was pretty clearly fucked up long before Mia ever got involved, and not actually wanting to adopt a walking bioweapon whose idea of a happy family involves mould-powered mind control really does not reflect badly on Mia's character.

Whether Mia was already working for the Connections before she met Ethan also isn't clear. The guidebook tells us she began working for them in 2010, and married Ethan in May of 2011 (later confirmed by the date on Mia's ring in RE8) – though it doesn't specify when she and Ethan met. Even by Texas standards, marrying someone you’d known less than a year would be pretty unusual, so it’s likely Ethan knew her before she took the job. But even that 2010 statement comes along with the bit about Mia being hired as ‘a researcher’, so you can always take it with a grain of salt if you'd prefer.

And that's pretty much it for what the complete RE canon ever tells us about Mia and her former employers.

So here’s where I’m left with Mia’s role at the Connections. Even if she wasn’t aware of exactly what she was signing up for when she joined the company, and even if she considered all that lying to her husband about it to be a simple matter of confidentiality around sensitive research, she’s fully aware by the disaster in 2014, and plainly has a guilty conscience when she admits to lying to Ethan in her video message. However responsible she may or may not have been, she's still complicit. Her hands are hardly clean.

But they’re still a whole lot cleaner than, say, Luis’, considering that he was a key member of the science teams at both Umbrella Europe and in Saddler’s cult, and I don’t see him getting a fraction of the same hate as Mia. They both regret what they’ve done, and they’re both willing to give their own lives to make up for it. No, Luis never lied to a spouse about it (that we know of), but he's every bit as shifty and secretive. And frankly, most of the other shit that gets dumped on Mia’s doorstep is just as much bullshit (like, people do realise the “Mia” we see having “marital problems” with Ethan at the start of RE8 isn’t Mia, right?) But that’s material for other posts.

We don’t know how Mia got involved with the Connections, or how she felt about working for them, because the games never give us this information, and that’s a real shame. But in the capitalist hellscape we’re all living in, she’d hardly be the first to find herself stuck working for truly terrible people, one way or another.

Meanwhile, everything we see her doing during the outbreak on the tanker speaks to a basically good person, desperately trying to run damage control in a fucked-up situation. She tells Alan she’s not going to let him die, even though what’s going down is his fault. She tries so hard to talk Eveline down. After she’s rescued by the Bakers in the Daughter's DLC, she insists on staying in the trailer, meaning to leave at her first opportunity – pretty significant, considering she knows she’s infected already. She also leaves them a message warning them to stay away from Eveline, even sharing information on how to make a serum if they are infected. If you pick her over Zoe on the dock, the first thing she does is try to convince Zoe to come with them anyway. Even under Eveline's mind control, you'll catch her ranting about needing to contain the outbreak, blaming herself, and telling Ethan she loves him with her last breath.

And after being infected herself, the first thing on her mind is to try and protect Ethan, recording that message admitting she’s lied to him, and warning him to stay away (Ethan never gets that message, but you can’t say Mia didn’t try). Mia loves Ethan enough to die to save him – and she will, if you choose the Zoe path, and she’ll do it without a second thought.

Mia is fascinating to me as a character because she’s so full of contradictions: a woman who leaves syrupy video messages sending ‘tons of kisses’ to her husband, but who is completely comfortable running around with a machine gun killing mould-monsters, and who shrugs off an Eveline jump-scare with 'fucking hallucinations!' Someone who’s done bad things and knows it, and is trying so hard to make up for it, but whose background and motivations are left frustratingly undeveloped. But if you haven’t caught that Ethan and Rose mean more to her than anything, you really haven’t been paying attention.

Whatever you assume about Mia’s full story, she’s complicated in a way that makes her so much more interesting to me than most of the franchise’s more popular playable characters. I am very serious in saying I want RE9 to be just the full Mia-Winters-story, because to me that’s the only remotely satisfying justification for keeping her such a mystery for so long. I know that's not at all likely, but fuck it, I can dream.

Mia’s made her share of mistakes, but holding her responsible for everything the Connections has ever done is no kind of fair.

[starlvenus]

Old friends

warnings! none :p sam winchester x gn!reader summary: Sam winchester's hunt wasn't going well.. leading him to a diner where he would reunite with an old friend from Stanford. __

Sam wasn't having a good day so far.. Everything he and Dean were doing for this hunt was all thrown out the window, all of their research was wrong, only because someone gave them a fake tip, leading them to think it was a whole different monster.

The most mundane diner was ahead; the red sign on the roof shined brightly.

Sam sighed pushing the door open, the overhead bell chiming loudly as he entered. The smell of coffee fills his nostrils, only momentarily distracting him from his chaotic day. 

His eyes scanned the menu, picking out what he would order, Burgers, Fries, and of course, pie for dean. His eyes narrow slightly as he tries to find a healthier option for himself.

He orders pretty quickly, shooting the waitress a small smile after he finishes. He shuffles in the seat trying to find a comfortable position.

His eyes observe the patrons in the diner. An elderly couple chatting over some coffee, a group of young teenagers, that's when he sees a familiar set of headphones, the sides adorned with those "nerdy" stickers, a nostalgic reminder to his time back at Stanford. Sam couldn't help but watch discreetly, taking in their new look, shorter hair, different style, yet his eyes were drawn onto that same bag.. His eyes scanned its pins and keychains seeing the small cat pin he had gifted was still there. Sitting in the spot he chose, nudged between a video game pin, and a movie pin.

Sam sat there contemplating whether to approach, doubt lingered in Sam's mind. Slightly remembering the times he and Dean were thrown onto tv screens..

readers pov I guess it was a pretty nice day.. I have a day off from work and nothing has gone wrong yet. The diner was pretty small and it had decent food, plus everything I've been drawing hasn't turned to shit! 

I got my pencil case out, taking out a few colours, a light blue, pink, yellow, green and a teal. I almost instantly start to colour in the little sketch, layering the colours randomly. My head bobs along to the beat of the song playing in my ears, the headphones slightly getting rid of the noises in the diner. The corners of my lips lift gently, creating a content smile.

  It wouldn't take long until I sensed someone looking at me.I tore my eyes away from my book and scanned the diner. My eyes would momentarily pass a familiar figure; this made me do a double take. His eyes widened slightly as I caught him, his eyes quickly darted away focusing on the table in front of him. I look away as well.. A little bit embarrassed. After a few minutes passed I looked back at the man.. Is that Sam? Sam winchester? My mind wanders back to my time in Stanford, Sam and I were pretty much best friends.. Well that's how it felt to me.  We met in an Art history class and pretty much became class buddies until one day we decided to meet outside of class. Then one day he pretty much disappeared.. Leaving me disappointed, and without my friend. I sat there for a bit debating if I should go over to him, just to say hi or maybe engage in small talk about how his life was going.

  I sat here contemplating whenever to approach him. I decided to pack up my pencils and books, hastily shoving them back into my bag. I removed the headphones from my ears, letting them hang around my neck. Before leaving the table, I put the small mug on top of the plate, making it easier for the waitress to get the dishes. I take a small deep breath and get up. Grabbing my bag and walking over to where Sam sat. whatever pov :p Their boots make heavy footsteps, prompting Sam to look up. Their eyes lock, and they offer a small wave accompanied by a slight smile.

Before they speak, they shuffle into the booth, taking the slightly uncomfortable seat in front of him.

"Hey, um, you're Sam Winchester, right?" Despite already knowing the answer, they feel compelled to confirm, just in case. Sam smiles slightly, his eyes narrowing, trying to place you. "Yeah, It's me.” he pauses “It's Y/N right?" They smile at him recognizing them, "yeah! it's me" they pauses for a bit unsure of what to say to one of their past friends "i- this might be insensitive of me but- what happened? why'd you.. Leave?" Sam looks down, remembering the incident. The memory still burned into his mind. "Family business.” He pauses before speaking again. “I had no say in it, really. It's a long.. complicated story.” His eyes shifted around the diner as his thoughts drifted back to that night. He sighs and continues “But you know that's not important, what have you been up to? You look good”

they swallow and nod, a small reassuring smile on their face. "Oh well thank you! decided to change up a few things.." they mumble slightly. "You look good too! your hairs grown pretty long" Sam grins slightly and looks down, a little embarrassed by the compliment"Yeah, the hair has certainly grown longer"  He looks back at you, his eyes searching for something. A question crosses his mind. He remembers the last time you two spoke, he asked about your plans for the future. "How about that degree? Still pursuing it?" They shrug a little “nah.. A few months after you left I realised that it was really for me and I left to do other things..” they fidget with their fingers “But… I still have student loans which is unfortunate” they give Sam an awkward smile, their feet swaying back and forth under the table. 

Sam chuckles slightly at your feet swinging, it brought back old memories of you tapping your feet together.

 "So, what have you been up to these days? I'm sure your talents were put somewhere else."

Sam and Y/N sit there for ages, just talking about how everything is going, what they have been doing since they last saw each other.. Despite Sam already getting all his food, they continue to sit there just chatting away. It wasn't until Dean called Sam, whining and grumbling about where he was and why he was taking so long.. Sam came up with a quick lie about how the diner was filled with a bunch of people. Sam hangs up and looks at you “look.. im sorry but I've got to get back to my brother” Y/n smiles “oh- yeah that's okay!” They pause and watch him pack up the now lukewarm food. Y/N hesitated before speaking, but went for it “I- do you want my number? Maybe we can chat sometime?” Sam paused, contemplating the offer, and then nodded with a smile, "Yeah, sure."

[hero-next-door]

Defending Nathan Prescott

(From Every Accusation)

All fact proven & common sense theory

No bullshit.

I suck at grammar. Deal with it.

I've replayed the game far too many times to gather this. I read into everything and even read into and WATCHED people who have suffered the same mental illness and situations Nathan has been in.

What I'll be covering:

Illness, rib breaking, dead animals, bdsm, Chloes pic, Rachel, gun on campus, Kate, Pompidou, Jefferson, wealth and his father.

And dont even THINK about skipping ahead!

Everything here is tied into one another. Read from start to finish. You're on this post to understand, right? Or to argue? Im not here to argue so, bye.

Lets start from the top...

Nathans downfall was caused by society and all who failed him. He's driven by hatred of others who don't understand him, and the game purposly wrote him off that way. They want players to hate him from what sides of the stories we've experienced. They gave this character controversial hobbies and a cynical bully attitude to really keep you suspecting him and not guessing Jefferson. The game isn't about Nathan. It's about Max. We learn so much about Max and everyone close to her. The tears they shed, the pains they've endorsed. Same with Chloe and Rachel's story. My heart goes out to all of them. We don't get to see that with other characters. Therefore, we don't care for them...or that's the games' intentions. We don't know the ins and outs of Nathan. Only what the game shows us, which are all negative. So, of course, disliking Nathan is only reasonable.

Mental Illness

We start with mental illness. He has Psychosis. Lots of proof, but i'm assuming you've seen it all already. Like, do people know what Psychosis is? Do they REALLY know what it is? Because this ALONE changes everything. And not Psychopathy ..Psychosis. Two different things, pookie. Psychopathy is the one where part of the brain is missing or disturbed. THEY'RE the ones that don't have empathy. Psychosis is different. Anybody can get it. This illness can take your empathy and awareness away, then bring it all back after the harm is done, leaving you to process that. Schizo and Bipolar are also all quite a handful to deal with too. Loud Noises/downgrading voices in your head SO LOUD that people will do anything to calm them. (Dont be shy, youtube: "28- Psychotic Episode" by Collège d'Alma) The feeling of loosing your mind is something I notice a lot of haters dont empathize on especially if they killed or hurt sombody. The brain slips into a state so disconnected that interviews with recovering patients I've seen describe it as confusing and scary and dont recall saying the stories they told and actions they did others. Imagine not being able to remember the hurtful things you've said and done. Imagine being told you killed somebody... with your own hands? And you can hardly remember what happened. Like... how would you react? Think about it. Anybody can get psychosis with enough trauma or a kick in the noggin. Some people who were interviewed that had psychosis said that they found relief when getting high or drunk. Little did they know the symptoms could bounce back up to 5x during withdrawal. But they were so desperate to get rid of the voices that they abused the drugs. Like....wow the game really did their research to create such a complicated character. Anyway, moving on.

Edit: After further research, he certainly had bipolar disorder first. Then it went left untreated, therefore sunk him to worse mental state of many other illnesses. Drugs only made things much, much worse. Bipolar disorder can cause schizo and schizo to lead to psychosis. 🙄Jesus Nathan quit hogging all the illnesses.

Now, let's break down everything else...

Shooting Chloe

Just rewatch it. Aims gun, Chloe pushes him, it tightens grip, ACCIDENTLY shoots her, immediately drops gun and gets really scared of he's done, checking to see if she's alive! If you specifically rewatch the ending of Lis1 when Chloe gets shot, they extend his reaction. He goes back and forth, checking her body. If he wanted to kill her, you check pulse and then run. Not sticking around crying about it. There's your empathy you're all saying he doesn't have. Other times where he could have shown more empathy ties with his Psychosis. Some people with the illness said that the voices loudly in their head will convince them that everyone around you is your enemy. Everyone is after you. It can twist your brain to feel anger and fear towards others. Nathan is always hung up on how everyone is using him and trying to control him. Which people ..DO use him. So now he's convinced that everyone is. He's not choosing to feel this way. He just needs psychiatric help.

Breaking Ribs

In Before The Storm, his entire demeanor is completely different than the Lis 1. He's more cowardly and not loud and aggressive. We'll be mentioning his creepy "pervy" binder later. Nathan isn't violent until the end IF you let Nathan get bullied and push his life in a negative direction. Sure, it's not Chloe's responsibility, but this is the game's way of showing you his downfall. We need to remember the game hides scenes and expect you to make up what happened behind the scenes. He broke Samantha's ribs over ..what? She's always so desperate to defend Nathan and even gets upset with Chloe when she doesn't help. So, if you tell her the wrong option to pressure kindness into Nathan, it results in him breaking ribs. How, though? Haters immediately hop online to say cause he's a mean and abusive non-empathic nut head. Are you sure he didn't just push her away, and her clumsiness just fell over? This took place after the play...so he possibly...pushed her off... 😰 She did say she was clumsy. You don't think she would have tried to hug or touch him in any way. Ok ok...calm down... Let's take a step back.. You get this "breaking ribs," ending from letting Nathan get bullied and embarrass himself during the play that his father pressured him about! Adding a little "..fuck you.." to the audience. Showing his start to his villain career and the start of him hating everyone, and you tell Samantha to go hug him!? This is the start of his mental spiral if you let things play out this way. But hurting her with intention? No. Lets tie this in with the other endings to their relationship. You get the clumsy ending. She hurts herself differently, and Nathan is with her in the hospital. Saying how he feels bad that she got hurt. (empathy bell) And they continue yo talk about her photo or whatever. Tie this with the rib one, tie this with the Chloe getting shot incident, and tie this with his mental illness. Come on, do i gotta spell it out for you.. Hurting someone is not what he attends to do. Like he quotes in his voice mail. (Speaking of that voice mail, empathy bell.) He does get angry at Samantha and hurts her, and we as players dont know the full story. But what was playing in his head seconds before and the entirety of the game that led up to this IS the reason why he accidentally hurts her. His anger from the entire game was built up and, unfortunately, released on her. Whatever happened, breaking her ribs was not on his to-do list! And then we have.. The good ending. He sits beside her, smiling.

Oh, wait! He's a little psycho with no human emotion? Psychosis has all parts of the brain attached, pookie. For most cases, It can be cured and helped. I can get it. YOU can get it. He has human emotions when he is at his very rare peaceful moments like with this good ending, when with Victoria ig and other scenes we tend to forget. Because painting him as the villain was the games goal. Jefferson was the plot twist.

Daddy Issues, Smug Talk, and a Gun on campus

Simple guys. Simple. You represent this school. You represent our name. This is a legacy. You will not embarrass me. This isn't about you or your problems!

Sure, YOU wouldn't crumble under that pressure, but Nathan sure did. Sure, child abuse isn't an excuse to "kill" people. But is it the child's fault? Sean-beanbag prescott should be arrested for not taking his boy to the asylum. Instead, he argues with a doctor!? Goofy, bro. But so many people are fueled with anger towards Nathan instead. It's whatever. Prescott, literally being his name, was already a red flag to other characters and chose to hate and bully him over it. Drew hated for what his FATHER did. Nathan did ..what again? Notice how that "rich Malfoy talk" wasn't really present in Before The Storm. Sure he tried to burn Drew with a family financial situation insult but the "Im rich, my father owns everything, I got a lawyer, money this and that" wasn't in his character in the Before the Storm. I believe being a prescott wasn't really in his future goals, and he wasn't ever really passionate about it. It's all in the annoyance in his tone with his father before the play. Lis1 he uses it so often to show that he's the boss and in control. He is influenced by representation for his family/school, wealth, intimidation, and of course hatred and believing everyone hates him. In his mind, everyone is against him, after him, and wants to use him. Again, he doesn't choose to think this way. Let me explain my last sentence clearly, though. Imagine being surrounded by a ton of people. All their attention is on you. They hate who you are. They talk about you. You have a defensless stomach sinking feeling and scared because all these people surrounding you are looking at you and all your insecurities and laughing at you. Well, obviouslysome of that is not going on in reality. But to Nathan, that IS his reality, and he has no control over it. Anyways I shouldn't have to keep explaining mental illness and how it stresses the brain. The bottom line is that his status and waving a gun around is what he thinks keep others out of his head. He can barely throw a punch. He had to use his head on warren, and did you catch when Max hit him in that scene? The dude was literally holding onto his face like he'd been battered. Like she did NOT hit that hard lmao. He's weak. He's always been the same tiny Nathan from before the storm. Just now, he uses masks for intimidation to stop his bullies, and anyone he thinks is "after him." He never meant to use a gun on anybody, just a threat. During the second scene where warren reunited a head butt with Nathan.. If you pull off warren, he barely even aims the gun when he runs away towards his room. Cowardly. He feels that he has to, to protect himself. He also uses his father as a threat, but clearly, that never worked. Also, I noticed him crying when you let Warren get crazy on him? Dudes apologizing and sobing? Guess that's not his first rodeo, rip.

Dead Animals

There is no proof he hurt animals. That's not really like him. He does have a list of illnesses, but Psychopathy isn't one of them. Y'all can keep yappin, but it's not. Clearly NOT one of them. He could have hurt an animal during an unaware episode, but there will not be any awareness behind it. Anyways, there are plenty of artists that do the same thing. Nathan is very passionate about photography and protraying solitary but not in the same way Jefferson does. Jefferson certainly uses that manipulation, but we'll get to that later. There are artists that like to shine on death in a positive light and in sorrow. There's also beauty in anatomy. It's not my cup of tea, but someone close to me can name me all kinds of gross organs and would be down to disect any animal. Yuck. But to them.. its fascinating, and they are the greatest people in my life. In love and in empathy. (NOT comparing my pookie to Nathan, PAUSE.) In anatomy theres Education and surprise. Death is also a theme and style too. Skulls and gore, super "rad" fukin "knarly."

BDSM Skip to (●) next part if needed

Ok.. so he's a little frisky. Y'all need to remember this is a fictional game first, okay? Lol Anyway, I can't defend him much here, but I got something. Firstly, the game WANTS you to suspect Nathan. Can't keep his room pretty and pink. They have to make it freaky and spooky. They paint Nathan as the villian for you to only focus on him as a suspect. So that everyones jaws are dropped with Jefferson twirls in.

Anyway...defending BDSM? This can bring trauma to those who have experienced it negatively or view it negatively. So skip to the Frank defense or read more if you want.

Bdsm relationships are very controversial. Some people see it as unhealthy, abusive, and sick. But if you have talked to or listened to other people within these relationships, they state that its completely consensual, safe, harmless, a breach of deep trust with their partners, and simply a fetish or kink The goal is to have fun at your limit..not pass the limit. There are twisted people who have broken that barrier and made it not fun and abusive. That's where I can't argue. If you feel that way towards the topic, I completely empathize with you.

Nathan has shown in his other photos a black and white theme of solitary. And you can tell that he might have taken those bdsm photos himself. As the quality is almost like the Pompidou photo. Everyone blends him taking bdsm photos with his angry behavior and "non empathic" demeanor. But this is where I loop back to Before The Storm hugging-my-binder Nathan. It's shown that in one of his endings, he took photos of Samantha. Obviously, NOT bdsm photos. His binder was a school project. But Samantha obviously consented, and Nathan was passionate enough to show her. He sees them as art. Naked girls have been models for sculptures and paintings. Its beauty. That's IF she was naked in some way in those photos. Which I still doubt. School project. Im sure the photos were gentle and strange and misunderstood, and Drew was just in his bully era. His reaction would have been a lot more eye-opening if he had a face full of tits or straps. Nathan begged for his binder back and even nervously reacted, showing he had love for his work and 'took time with it' (as he quotes when Drew throws it). I bring this up here to show that the women in his photos were indeed given consent, and if hes passionate about depicting his art, hurting them wouldn't be on his agenda. As we all learned today that hurting people was never his intentions until drugs and illness met with pressure and intimidation clouds his brain.

I read up on other artists that painted things similar. In their paintings, they expressed dread, vulnerability, feeling traped, and ..feeling used. If Nathan did find the images he took arousing, then why would he hang them up like everything else in his room like art? I believe that they're depicted in an artful way and in its black and white shading brings a sad darkness. If it's anything like the painters I mentioned, maybe Nathan has a deep level of empathy we don't understand.

●Frank and Pompidou

I didn't even know he took a picture of Franks hurt dog in the road because you little freaks threw his treat in the street!? This will also tie in to chloes pic, but we'll get to that. Frank first, as it's pretty simple. Nathan runs some system with Frank. And it's pretty obvious it's the same thing Drew was doing in Before the Storm. Nathan clearly doesn't like it as he finds it controlling, but getting his hands on drugs is a great way to forget his flaws and calm his illness symptoms. Which only created a loop of his symptoms worsening, as talked about before. His illness is very active towards the end of Before the Storm. You can tell by his huge character difference that drugs only made it worse.

Pompidou is a good dog, but just remember he's not the one who hurt him. This ties in with what we explained in the dead animal phase. The Imagine is black and white. It's a strange art most people don't understand. Man, I don't even understand it. But these people aren't heartless, and they're simply expressing pain. Or.. he took it for the same reason he took Chloes pic. To feel that he's in control, thinking this will help his mental reality of thinking everyone can use him, as explained earlier. But i doubt it. One is in color, and Pompidou is not. One is misguided, and one is "art."

Jefferson, Rachel, Kate, Chloes pic

If i see one more person throw him in the same trash bin as Jefferson, im going to puke. Anyway, I've twisted my head around this story so many times, begging to see the bigger picture. No pun attended. Jefferson was pulling the strings all along ..you know that, right? If Nathan was never there, Jefferson would have still done his disgusting projects. He certainly brought Victoria over without Nathan's usage. He didn't need Nathan, Nathan just made it easier cause he can easily be manipulated. Making Nathan do it all so the consequences will fall on him. Jefferson is smart and knows the right words to say. Nathan is missing the kindness of a father figure. All he has to do is play with his feelings. Nathan falls too easily to kindness. He felt the kindness of Samantha during the good ending, and He felt the kindness from Victoria.. but Victoria toxic bully nature wasn't helping. The bottom line is Jefferson easily manipulates him and understands his mental reality and uses that against him. Adding thoughts into Nathans head. Jefferson learned to use Nathan's illness to his advantage. Nathan trusted Jefferson as did everyone in that school. Why on earth would Jefferson wrong him? He looked up to him, so when Jefferson slowly brought him into his plans of drugging girls, Nathan thought that it was all ..moral. In reality, you and I know obviously that's not okay, but to Nathan (and his severe illness), he trusted Jefferson was doing no wrong. We don't understand the mental strain he was under. Manipulation goes a long way. Heres how he did it. He probably said things like 'We are the same Nathan, this is art just like yours.' It starts small, Nathan gets him the drugs. Then he pulls him in, and Nathan starts drugging the girls for me. Start driving them here. Start helping me inside the dark room. Start helping me inject my victims. Jefferson had so much power over him. He was connected with his father. He can threaten his grade, his representation, and his future in art. He knew all the right things to say and do. He knew how his head worked. Clog him up with drugs, and keep him quiet. Heal his missing father needs and demand him for your needs. Does this not make Nathan a victim, too?

Then ...the Rachel incident happened. Nathan was NOT mentally aware of what he's done. The excited "Rachel!" When he saw Max at the diner clearly shows that he truly expected her to pull up. This mixes with the symptoms we've discussed. He only remembers bits and pieces as obviously it was beyond traumatizing. Sending him in an insane spiral and the infamous psychosis drawing. (Don't be afraid, google psychosis drawings. Damn. Just imagine you recovered from psychosis and laying eyes on that and not remembering you drew that..ugh...I'd cry.) Someone with Psychopathy wouldnt feel traumatized from such events, debunking the fact everyone thinks Nathan has Psychopathy. He doesn't have Psychopathy, he has psychosis. Moving on. Jefferson was certainly angry with him and drugged Nathan himself after the incident, which really helped Nathan to forget what he's done. But Jefferson's anger and not talking to him tore him apart. His emotional attachment clearly wasn't having it. The note he wrote Jefferson in desperate attempt to bring him back after ruining Jefferson plans goes to show just how much he wants that sense of being cared for. If only it was someone else that wasnt Jefferson ..or his dad can do is fucking job too.

Alcohol was certainly a great method of forgetting what he did. So then comes Chloes' interaction with him. We know the story. He did not SA her, I can say that right here and now. Nothing like that was behind this. You can tell by the way Chloe presented the story to Max. There wasn't an uncomfortable tone to her story. She didn't seem traumatized but more shocked, and "it was pretty crazy." She also wasn't drugged for that long. She woke up very soon, fully clothed. What obviously happened is that Nathan used this to feel in control like the mentioned way above. Drugs and Psychosis is no jokes. Who knows what hell is playing in his mind, but I unfortunately believe that this was to try to win back Jefferson. He had been angry at him and ignoring him, and even tho he hates drugging, his confusion and drunk state led him to this. He's cowardly, and his mind is slipping and tries to do what he thinks is right for him. He's misguided and leads down the wrong path.

Nathan did not SA Kate! Kate story breaks my heart into a million pieces, but if she was SA-ed, it wasn't Nathan. After everything I said above, you can tell that that isn't in his character. But here I want to bring up the voicemail. Nathan claims multiple times that he never wanted to hurt anybody, implying that he felt forced to do harm. Something he DID NOT want to do. Why on earth would anybody have felt forced to SA somebody!? I'm not saying Kate WASN'T SA-ed as I can only assume maybe the boys she was shown with in the video did something or Jefferson. Victoria was Kates bully!!! Nathan wanted to be liked by Victoria and was influenced by her nature. He's desperate for attention and kindness. Victoria did far more to hurt Kate and her reason as to why was shit. You go THAT FAR to one up your photography game. Girl, bye. She spread that video, and she still has empathy, too? Her regretting everything? Did she reallyy regret it? Or did she want to make herself look good for her representation? She showed regret via text message in Before The Storm, too? She doesn't have a mental illness, but the game gave her an act of forgiveness and used her as a victim so the audience would sympathize with her. Goes to show you the game controls what they want you to feel. If they were to do that with Nathan..would opinons be different? Taking us into his mind and how he sees the world around him. They could have..but didnt. Well.. We have the voicemail, but obviously, that didn't stop the haters. It's unfortunate. But the game gave me just enough little clues for me to shine light on in this post. They put so much into his character but never showed the audience the truth.

Conclusion

What we've learned today is that Nathan isn't the villain you think. He's been manipulated, used, and needs mental help, but im sure my old Nathan-defending friends have said this time and time again. Im here to add something....

It's been PROVEN that he's capable of all human emotions. You just refuse to believe it because you're mistaking his illness and claiming all of this was intentional. Psychosis can be temporary. It's like a hand that steals your common sense, feelings, empathy, and sympathy, and you're only left with acting on pure chaos and negative or fearful emotions. After long treatment, your sense of reality returns, your feelings, your empathy, your sympathy.. And all you have now is guilt and regret and self blame that you hurt somebody. If you let Nathan kill Chloe, he is arrested. He had doctors aware of his illness and would have been charged with illness in mind. Forcing the treatment he needed ages ago. By the time Lis 2 came out... I wonder how he's taking it all in? What he did to everyone, what he did to Rachel.

He was written off to die, be locked up, and blamed. Unfortunately, he was caught in the crossfires of the harm of our favorite characters. If he was born in a different family and away from Jeff, he would have never hurt anybody. Matter a fact, he would never have suffered with his listed mental illnesses.

This goes out to all real accidental murder cases. There will always be a great divide in opinions. I hate comparing fictional games with real life, but I find it crazy that we call others nonempathtic when they aren't empathic themselves. It's like the word "accidental" is worthless.

Its always a debate..

Do we feel bad for the lives lost and their families

or

Do we feel bad for the mental crumble of the one who never meant to kill and how their familes have to deal with that.

Are they worthy to walk this earth? Are they worthy to see the daylight again? Are they still human, too? Should they die, too? Is redemption possible?

Who knows. Peoples opinions won't change unless they themselves fall onto the opposing team. If they were to suffer the chaos of accidentally murdering someone or the grief of losing someone from an accidental murder.

Red Nathan, the first Nathan we all experienced from Lis1. Damaged and doomed. Used and mentally obstructed. It's unfortunate things ended this way.

Blue Nathan, Appears in Before the slStorm and Max's alternate timeline. He is clean and hasn't touched drugs. He had not been involved in crimes or violence yet. In this alternate timeline, he has been somehow saved and kept away from mental destruction and Jefferson. We will never really know what drove Nathan towards this peaceful path, but I assumed that it was the kindness of Max that led him in the right direction. (Max somehow changed Victoria, too. With her demeanor being so gentle. I really am curious about the whole back story of that timeline... I think about it alot)

[factual-fantasy]

19 Asks! :00 Thank you! :DD 🧁

And now you see my frustration and lack of patience. <XDD

Its the easiest to follow boundary that I can think of. Yet people still wanna fuss about it and send me horrible messages and run me down. Calling me selfish, ungrateful, spoiled.. Its exhausting. :( 💔

Sorry, I don't take requests. :/

Do beasts like that exist in the game?? :00 Dang, that's spooky-

Well, I imagine that Seafoam, Octo, Louis and any other tough guy on the ship would go down there and weed it out. Dragging it up onto the deck so that Blue Beauty could snatch it and dispose if it however she needed to <XDD 💀

I must specify that my cookie run characters are not in "my version" of the world- <:0 as in I didn't create the world they live in and how it works-

These cookie characters are fan OCs for an existing game! And note, its a game that I know next to nothing about! <:( I only researched enough to make characters that might fit into that universe somewhat realistically,, other than that, I've got nothing! :(

So about a pirate community being led by a King or Queen of some other chocolate brands..?.. aaaaaa I have no idea! <:0 Its not my world! Does it fit? I don't know.. Sorry.. :(((

@yourstrulylightstar283

Thank you <:) but hey, I have high hopes that this trial will end within the next few weeks! :D ..I really hope it will :')

@neo-metalscottic

:DD No problem! While I am spending an unfortunate amount of my time just lounging around trying to feel better.. I at least want to get around to answering asks! Its darn near my favorite part of running this blog after all! <XDD

When it comes to the Commander, he is not meant to have any fancy powers like in the movie or from Kamek. Magic in my universe is meant to be a very complicated practice. Something that would take years of studying and training to perfect. At least to the level where it can be used reliably in combat.. What I mean by this, is I don't think there's any magic related tricks that the Commander could "pick up" or be taught.. Magic also has everything to do with a magikoopa's gem staff thing, soo... <://

Though I suppose that the "superspeed flight" and the "self destruct" aspect could be incorporated into the Blue Parakoopa species somehow.. Perhaps due to the shape of their winds and flying styles, they could be incredibly fast. And Since they are so big and sturdy, perhaps they have been known to rocket towards their enemy and come crashing down onto/into them with all their might. Completely obliterating what ever they happen to hit. Like an explosion! XD Hmm.. I might just adopt that XDD Thanks for the idea!

Also he might make for a decent sparring partner if he was asked to do so! :0 though that's not his primary job..

As for Larry, unfortunately I've thought about him the least amongst the Koopalings. :((( Though I do intend to keep his star mark somehow.. and I didn't know about the music thing! :0 My Larry definitely wouldn't be a DJ, but I could certainly add an interest in music into his character! :0 Sounds like you kind'a built a bit of Larry for me! XD

@kaylee4509

Thank you so much!! I'm glad to hear it! :DD And "like spam", XDD there's no such thing on my blog! I consider it a huge compliment! :DD

@ripchaos69

:DD Thank you very much!! I'm glad you like what I've made!! :}} ✨💖✨

Me neither man, me neither. If someone else had set a boundary like that I would just drop it no questions asked. I don't get why its so hard for others to do the same.. and its such a small and simple boundary at that. It just baffles me, it really does. :'((

@petra-creat0r

I always knew/assumed that's why people harp on me so much about it. "All other artists like it. So why don't you like it? You make no sense."

I understand how everyone else sees it, but even then I wish people would get the message and just leave me alone about it. You know?

When I set a boundary, don't come into my ask box and question me about it. Don't start criticizing me or send me death threats or call me selfish and ungrateful. As has happened before..

Just read the boundary, "please do not make fanart of any kind for me" and then leave it/me alone. Its all I ask. :( I promise I would/will do the same for you, 💖

Thank you for the kind message and support, it really means a lot <:}

I'm doing by best every day to heal and work on myself as much as I can. I'm hoping to see improvements soon! <:}

@jennifergacha

Sorry, I don't take requests. But it sounds like you already have a good idea goin. Why not give it a go yourself? :0

:DDD Thank you so much!! That means the world!! :}} 💖

I have not :( I've seen and heard wonderful things about it though! No doubt its an awesome show :}}

@littlelightfish

WAAHAHAGG THANK YOU!! :DDD Nothing means more to me than to see people so passionate about my original characters! My ORIGINAL! CHARACTERS!! 😭😭��💖💖 IM SO HONORED!!

XDD No no don't worry! You're fine! :}

Now, I do advise that people don't shove headcannons onto my charaters- BUT! I say this because in the past people have shipped my original characters together and have put mental illness and sexuality headcannons on themm.. which is just not ok. It made me super uncomfortable and should be a no brainer. Don't do that with peoples personal characters unless they say they are ok with it-

But this is a bit different, taking what I've already established and just gushing about it/digging into it a little deeper is alright! Honestly its such an honor! :DD It makes me very happi :}}} 💖💖

@jayden-for-now

@komikudikentalendo

:(( I been goin through it ngl. But I'm sure in a few weeks and maybe after I get a couple good rainy days under my belt? I'll be back to my old squiggly self :}

@beryl-shade (First link/video in question) (Second link/video in question)

I like to look at my cookie crew through more "serious" glasses. I don't think they ever would be involved in a coordinated musical number..

But even if they were, I'm not too sure how they'd react/feel.. :( I know Octo and Spidercrab wouldn't be having a good time though, that's for sure! XDD

[boombox-fuckboy]

I think many of you would enjoy Lost Terminal. It's future sci-fi, and hopepunk, and just, deeply kind.

There's an AI living in a satellite and he's very lonely. His name is Seth, he's inarguably a sweetie, and the Earth below him looks very very different to when he was first created. The climate has changed, the lights of cities have gone out, and there's a whole new ocean.

The only people who talk to him now are two other AI on the Earth: St. Petersburg, who was designed to predict the future and is now perpetually stressed because of it, and Antarctica, who was sent to the South pole in a massive research vehicle awaiting her crew, who never came.

Atypical to AI backstories, Seth's mother cared for him dearly, letting him choose his own voice, reading him stories, teaching him everything she could, and making sure he knew he was a real person. He similarly had good relations with the rest of his crew, who were never offered a way home to Earth.

The show delights in talking about all kinds of interesting things, like radio, seed vaults, radiation, orbital mechanics, sleep cycles, lunar photography, and of course, tabletop games.

One thing I value about it greatly is this sense, both in the story and from a meta perspective, of doing the best with what you have to help other people. In the show this often takes the form of community, sharing information and resources, being there to help where you can, and a theme of learning, both in terms of knowledge and just how to be. It doesn't pretend humans are perfect, but it also really believes that people will more often than not, help where they can.

Externally, this comes from some of the topics and representation in the show, which has plenty of queer characters, and an interest in mental health. A few of these feel as though they're not something the creator has much direct experience with, but that he's made an effort to research, understand, and give a simple but meaningful (and always kind) portrayal of. Asexuality, dissociative identity disorder, being trans, to name a few, and none of these characters are insignificant. I personally find it a comforting reminder that we always have allies out there, people who might know a lot or almost nothing, but who are still willing to listen and support. And that it's good to be someone who doesn't know, but is willing to learn.

There's transcripts for free on the Patreon, which come out with each episode, there's gorgeous original music, they've got simple but clean and effective soundwork (good for lab listening), Seth has a nice voice, there's no ads, and a new episode a week with surprisingly short breaks between seasons.

There's currently 12 seasons of 10 episodes each, and each episode is about 10-20 minutes. They aren't too heavy, and it's an easy podcast to pick up where you left off without feeling lost, if that number intimidates you.

I've adored this show since it was only a season long, and still do. It's worth the listen.

[taranida]

Thomas Zane's writing or the lack thereof

The third and final point I left unanswered in my theory about the 70’s.

the extent of Thomas’ writing powers, since as much as it is stressed a lot that he wrote himself out of reality, Barry, with a little research, is still able to find out about his existence, yet Alan in one of the “Writer in the Cabin” TV’s claims “A story is a beast with a life of its own. You can create it, shape it, but as the story grows, it starts wanting things of its own. Change one thing, and you set off a chain reaction of events that spreads through the whole thing.” The chain reaction here never happens: we have hard evidence that both Thomas and Barbara existed.

I guess, I should start with the rules of writing things into reality, that we learn throughout several games.

In AW1 Alan says about chain reactions: change one thing and others will follow, because the characters and the world in the story must be true to themselves. In AWAN it expanded even further with Alan making his, sometimes quite ridiculous, phantasies come true by starting the chain reaction by nudging the reality to fit his writing. One way or another it’s established well enough: each word causes the butterfly effect. Write something wrong and the whole thing will fall apart or twist; forget to add a little detail and the event you lead to will never happen.

There is a bit more about it in his Hotlines in Control:

Be clever. Make them do the work. Form the image in their minds. They make it. You just imply. Incept. They are drawn to the mystery. Obsessed. You set it up, they put it together. Their interpretation. And there's only one, because you give them no choice. And they believe in it, because it's theirs now.

Again: put a detail in and make people do the work. If you do it clever, you don’t need to expand on every little thing, the story will leave them no choice but to accept, believe and act accordingly.

The story needed many beginnings. Many springs. Streams that turned into a river, a flood, and then, an ocean. This was one. Wake used the materials he had. The connections he had. The people. The places. Wake put them in to make it true. His wife. The psychiatrist. His city. These connections, like magnets, moved things. Alice was a conduit. She'd been in the Dark Place. The Thing-that-Had-Been-Hartman sensed her near. Sensed Wake through her. Went berserk. Broke loose. Wake made sure Alice was already gone by then. Safe. The more springs, the more the story became real. The more people believed. Cause and effect. It was extremely delicate and hard work. It had to go through the path of least resistance. Where success was most likely. Where there was a connection already.

Alan always stresses out how important it is to thread on reality, use all the tools to make the events as plausible as possible for everything to fall into place. Yet, much of his writing, that came true, is pretty unbelievable stuff. Mr. Door in the second game calls Alan out on it: the rules are self-imposed, the loops are a choice. My take on it and all the hoops Alan creates to jump through: it doesn’t really matter what you write, the chain reaction will happen, as longs as you, as a creator, believe that’s possible.

Thomas, as it is presented, certainly, believed that he can erase himself and Barbara from reality; believed that this was the only way to stop the Dark Presence, to undo his mistake. And we see that some of it worked to a certain degree, as Cynthia tells us:

“He tried to undo it, wrote himself, her, everything he’d ever written out of the world. He was so famous. And afterward no one knew. Oh, Tom.”

Alan, who was very involved in the literary world, doesn’t recognise the name when he sees the shoebox in the cabin; Barry claims:

“Yeah, okay... anyway, there was an island there, owned by a guy called Thomas Zane. Now, some of the articles I found about him make him out to be a famous writer. But I ran a bunch of searches, couldn’t find a single thing he wrote.”

Thomas’ works are really hard to come by; the only people who read him, aside from those who knew him closely back in the 70’s, are Alan and Samantha, who found poems in shoeboxes, and Jesse Faden, who might’ve or might’ve not possessed a shoebox of his at some point in time. But the very existence of Thomas Zane and Barbara Jagger is quite known.

Barry with little efforts finds newspaper articles by Cynthia:

“Zane was heavily into diving, so much so that the place came to be called Diver’s Isle. But the volcano under the lake erupted in 1970, and Zane went down with the island.” […] “It gets better: a local girl, Barbara Jagger, drowned in Cauldron Lake just a week earlier. They were lovers.”

Randolph, the trailer park manager, acknowledges that Barbara is quite famous around here:

“Sure, Jagger’s a local spook story: ‘The Scratching Hag!’ Comes for you in the dark. Childish stuff like that.”

(Thomas is a legend around Bright Falls too, by the way, as seen from this bit of Sarah Breaker’s dialog:

Not even mentioning the Diver’s Isle, that still bears the name given to it by Thomas’ hobby.)

Barry continues:

“I’m just getting to the best part: all of the articles about this stuff were written by Cynthia Weaver. I asked around, and she’s that crazy bag lady you met...” […] “Yeah, anyway, she knew both Jagger and Zane before they both died and she had some kind of breakdown.”

And we have two of those articles in the guide:

This one mentions Thomas at the very last paragraph

And here’s the one about Barbara’s death

What we need from them are dates. They both were written before Thomas erased himself and Barbara from existence, so why the chain reaction didn’t delete those evidences together with other magazines and newspapers that mentioned him or printed his works? I mean, the way-to-go for writers at the time was to publish their pieces in the press, even Alan started like this, yet there is nothing of Thomas’. The bits that remained are those written in Bright Falls, where the AWE, caused by the last poem, originated and is strongest. I don’t believe that the journalist being Cynthia matters in this case; she indeed remembers Thomas and Barbara, but her previous work has nothing to do with it and had to be erased.

There is also a problem of fighting the Dark Presence off. I have to admit, the more I dive into this topic, the more I question if Thomas even wrote anything about deleting himself and Barbara from the annals of history or tried to fix him unleashing the Dark Presence onto the world. All we know about this comes from manuscripts written by Alan and the only two other sources of information. One being extremely vague on what happen and what Thomas wanted to achieve:

The Poet and the Muse

In the dead of night she came to him with darkness in her eyes Wearing a mourning gown, sweet words as her disguise He took her in without a word for he saw his grave mistake And vowed them both to silence deep beneath the lake

And another telling a very different story:

This House of Dreams

The diver (or what was left of him, his true self) spoke the words of his secret poem. The poem described a new world, an island in this sea of darkness, a safe haven, a paradise, a “baby” universe. The nature of the dark place was such that anything dreamed up there, any dream or a work of art, would come true, just as true as anything in our world can be. And the poem came true and the essence of the diver and the essence of his girlfriend escaped from the darkness and disappeared into this new world to live there happily ever after; while their shapes, his now taken over by a bright presence, as his girlfriend’s had been taken over by a dark presence, surged up, through the opening in the lake to our world, to continue their battle there.

According to the Bright Presence here, Thomas wrote his masterpiece about the new world, a personal paradise for him and Barbara to be happy there; not about erasing all traces of their existence and trapping the Dark Presence in the depths it came from, since both Presences surged up to the new playground.

So, did Thomas even care about fixing any mistakes, except for not getting the real Barbara back? Or was his writing so sloppy, he failed to erase anyone from reality properly and failed to contain the Dark Presence in the lake? And what happened after he was cosily tucked away in his new private baby-universe in the Dark Place with his love? How exactly did he save Cynthia, as she claims, from the darkness with his light?

What horror was left behind?

In my theory about the cabin, I wrote that we are led to believe that Thomas was caring, considerate and aware enough to leave a loophole for him to help when someone, as he predicted, eventually will awake the Dark Presence. The catch here is: some of this information comes from Alan’s manuscripts; some — from the “characters trapped” in Alan’s story, as Cynthia put it. What if Thomas wasn’t any of those things? What if he only cared about himself and Barbara and wrote them the happy ending, leaving others to deal with the mess that he caused?

IN TENEBRAS CADERE

“To fall into darkness”. Indeed, in the memory of a very questionable poet.

[nekodatta]

Finished the Indigo disk DLC and want to dump all my thoughts about THAT post credits scene somewhere.

So, HEAVY HEAVY SPOILERS IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED IT COMPLETELY.

--------

I can see that Game Freak wanted to make a "stable time loop" thing where we end up being the reason the Raidons have that name (we call them Mirai/Koraidon because the prof named them that, turns us they named them that way because they heard it from us), AND possibly give them the inspiration for the AI too (so.... It's our fault? Whoops?), but the thing is.... To be a time loop/classic bootstrap paradox, it has to actually follow a logical, circular line.

The professor we meet says and does things that make this impossible and contradict how things went in the timeline, and actually BREAK the loop:

- they act like they've never seen the Raidon but already have a son (and since they imply they've been away from home for a while, Arven is definitely not a toddler in their point in time)... their research diaries mention managing to pull the first Raidon BEFORE Arven was even born. ("I was expecting one new life to treasure, but what fortune to be blessed with this gift (the Raidon they just pulled)as well!")

- Most importantly, "our" prof giving us their book creates the situation where Arven shouldn't have it to do pretty much all the plot, because it wouldn't be there anymore.

- When they get the Briar book they say "maybe I should go home and read it..."... Like it's implying that they would actually go back home after finishing the research. The game seems to put a weird emphasis on this like it's supposed to be a solution but... We know it's not because they still stay away from home in our timeline even if they got this book.

- If you choose the dialogue option asking them if they are the AI, they say something like "An AI...? If it existed it sure would be convenient". So they are definitely from a point in time wayyy before they had the idea of making the AI (which is after they got abandoned by their partner and left all alone to go paranoid PPP mode, which again, is definitely after Arven was born)

- the notes from "our" Professor where they say "I met a kid and they gave me a white book" don't say anything about them giving the scarlet/Violet book away in return... Could be they simply didn't write it, but again... if they really met "us" like it seems to imply and for them it all happened years before even the main plot, then the Scarlet/Violet book should be REMOVED FROM THE TIMELINE FROM OUR (and Arven's) POINT OF VIEW.

The thing about time loops/bootstrap paradox plots is that they are paradoxes because they create a LOGICAL line of events that can only happen with an impossible event (time travel).

An example of how they could have made a bootstrap paradox plot:

Have Briar come to the crystal pool and meet her own ancestor Heath, giving him her "original" version of the book (or even just that one page where he mentions MEETING SOMEONE THAT GAVE HIM THE VERY PAGE WITH FORMULA HE WROTE what was up with that Game Freak??) that then Heath ends up "writing"... That's a classic bootstrap paradox where the book's existence itself becomes the paradox.

Instead we get a case where the professor's book, the key to the time machine AND the herba mystica plot, literally JUMPS the whole timeline because it fucks off with us in the post credits/the "future" from the prof's point of view lol

I'm not sure what to think: on one hand, I get the feeling that game freak wanted to make a time loop plot but screwed it up/didn't fact check their own writing/didn't care enough to make it have actual sense (sigh)

On the other hand, those and other things said by the professor could imply we meet a version from a slightly different timeline ("Maybe you are not actually from MY future", and them mentioning that their research involved pulling things from DIFFERENT timelines, explicitly using TIMELINES), and... That getting the white book is somehow going to help THIS version of the profs go back home for a somewhat happy ending for that Arven...? A part of me wants to think that it's that, a scenario in the line of "things didn't work out for our Arven but somewhere out here you helped another Arven get their parent back". This could also set up a Ultra sun/Ultra moon scenario with "Scarlet and Violet 2" games where we play through THAT timeline and "save" the professor... Maybe....?

But the note in the underdepths suggests that "our" professor ALSO had the white book and we know how that turned out for them lol

Why do WE even need to get the prof'a Scarlet/Violet book? It was fine where it was, lost in time with the AI so that no one can turn the machine back on.

So all in all: I kind of want to believe it's the second scenario (that's how the whole thing makes sense at least)... But knowing Gamefreak nope, they just botched the time loop idea by doing the ONE thing that doesn't let it make sense lol

[ryhmus]

ROWAN and FLOWER

In order to tell the story of these two, allow me, the STRANGER to paint the full picture...

In the early days when the Dreamer sought to escape the reality of his actions, he created the very first iteration of HEADSPACE. A safe place where he could be free of his guilt.

FLOWER

HEART; 10

JUICE; 60

ATTACK; 0

DEFENSE; 5

SPEED; 20

LUCK; 10

HIT; 9999

SKILLS; ENCOURAGE, HUG TIME!, SAD LOOK, CUDDLE

Likes; everyone he meets, cute things, flowers, ROWAN, board games, doing anything, SPROUT MOLES, being kind, hugs, making flower crowns, daisies, honey tea, cooking.

Dislikes; violence, lemons, not a whole lot really...

"I don't have a catchphrase? Should I have one?" -FLOWER

The very first version of Sunny's imaginary dream Basil in the very short lived first ever HEADSPACE. Much of FLOWER'S early life is unknown as when HEADSPACE, but his time when it fell shows him and the Dreamer's vessel at the time dubbed, OMORIBOY were left alone in the dark for a long time until the vessel without a host would rot away and leave nothing.

A year passed when FLOWER is saved by ROWAN from a HELLMARI. the two boys grow a bond together as they travel BLACK SPACE and attempt to help those unaffected to find a way out.

Their journey would come to an abrupt end when ROWAN discovered that he'd been replaced and forgotten about, a revelation that finally broke him and no matter how much FLOWER tried to help, the goth boy would succumb to BLACK SPACE and become a SOMETHING.

FLOWER, distraught by being alone again, would then follow shortly after...

More time would pass when D.R.E.A.M., an illicit organization that had seized Sunny's mind and recently found BLACK SPACE, exhumed two SOMETHINGS and with MEDUSA'S chemical research and her blueprints used to create a perfect clone, restored the two back to their original states.

BATTLE...

FLOWER lacks fighting ability due to his extremely unfinished state. However his SKILLS are all based around pure support, his SKILLS can heal, grant EMOTION buffs and raise STATS. FLOWER can only experience the first stage of any EMOTION except for ANGRY, which he incapable of feeling.

He has a very small SKILL set and his abysmal STATS, FLOWER is not built for combat...

PERSONALITY

FLOWER is a gentle soul by nature, kindness is his first answer to anything, he always looks for the good in anyone he meets and always tries to befriend them to a fault. Sometimes that naivety leads to him being taken advantage of. He can be clumsy and gets scared easily.

His relationship with ROWAN is a deep caring bond and love and would throw himself in harm's way to protect him if it came to it.

FLOWER'S appearance in HEADSPACE was made from a vague sense of a memory of a flower princess Aubrey had drawn for Basil's birthday...

UNIQUE SKILL; BOUNDLESS POSITIVITY

Regenerates JUICE at the end of the enemy's turn, enemies will almost never target FLOWER. When tagged as leader in the overworld, enemies will remain passive towards the party unless directly engaged.

ROWAN

HEART; 700

JUICE; 500

ATTACK; 100

DEFENSE; 90

SPEED; 190

LUCK; 2

HIT; 4

SKILLS; LASH OUT, ONSLAUGHT, COPYCAT, DODGE, RESTORATION, UPROOT, TRAMPLE, SPINNING SHOVEL, CROSS THUNDER SPLIT ATTACK,

likes; gardening, classical music, fighting, raspberry juice, FLOWER, Aubrey, excessive use of foul language (swearing is fun), Basil, doing anything stupid with KEL, Hot sauce, reckless violence, nightshade flowers, ORANGE OASIS.

dislikes; OMORI, cars, authority, guns, deep water, HUMPHREY, peanuts (is allergic), Hot Topic, BASIL*, SPROUT MOLES, OMORI, Titan arum, the corpse flower, OMORI (He really hates that guy okay?) unfair treatment.

"I don't play by the rules, except my own, if you don't like that, too bad." -ROWAN

ROWAN was created in the second version of HEADSPACE to replace FLOWER. Though he was given a higher purpose to act as HEADSPACE'S powerful guardian, doing battle with the creatures of the dark void below the dream world.

ROWAN lived a peaceful uneventful life until one day, a strange photograph that had fallen from his scrapbook would turn his world and everything he knew about it on it's head...

He had become the first of many in to discover the Truth about Mari...

But rather than tell everyone, the goth boy puts his duty first and joins on an adventure with the other dream friends to find answers along the way for the photo. In PYREFLY, he reaches the end of the LOST FOREST and is confronted by DADDY LONG LEGS, warning him not to go further in his foolish quest and the consequences of his goals. But ROWAN remained confident and determined in his abilities, leaving DADDY LONG LEGS no choice to give him what he wanted.

The knowledge of that day was devastating, seeing the Accident happen through Basil's eyes and watching them frame Mari's death leading to the birth of SOMETHING and creation of a world that neither he nor everything in it was not real, deeply traumatized ROWAN, his eyes permanently turning from emerald green to dark red, scarred from what he had seen.

despite it all, The guardian of HEADSPACE had one final desperate plan; to find a way to put the Dreamer, Sunny into a coma and use the time to wipe clean his memory of the Truth, and help him life free of guilt and still keep his dream world-an effort to fueled by the instability of his mind.

If there was no Truth to hide from, Sunny wouldn't have a reason to get rid of HEADSPACE.

OMORI would catch on to and confront ROWAN on his strange behavior, confirming that he knew what ROWAN was doing that it would end up killing Sunny. The two argued over what was right and OMORI ended up banishing ROWAN to BLACK SPACE and resetting the dream world and wiping all traces of the goth boy.

ROWAN'S life in BLACK SPACE was a hell that repeatedly killed him over and over again and wore down his will over time. The only comfort he had was the small boy FLOWER whom he befriended and fiercely protected. Ever strong-willed, ROWAN still held on that he could get back in OMORI'S good graces if he found him and explained his plans and intentions further.

That too was shattered when he found the monochrome boy ascending back to HEADSPACE with a green haired boy...

ROWAN had been replaced...and swore on that day that he'd get his revenge on OMORI for abandoning him...

The goth boy never found a way out and would succumb to BLACK SPACE in a cruel twist of irony, he became the thing he was made to destroy.

His story however wasn't over. Two years passed and he was suddenly awake in a world of color again amidst lab equipment and other strange things.

D.R.E.A.M. made him an offer he couldn't refuse...

BATTLE!

ROWAN in BATTLE is unique, he acts as an over-glorified cheat code and hits incredible hard to boot, from canceling enemy attacks with his own, to unique SKILLS that counter an enemy's strongest STAT. ROWAN is one of the few individuals capable of achieving a fourth EMOTION state. (LIVID, HOPELESS, UNHINGED) outside BATTLE, ROWAN has superhuman strength and agility, much similar to but stronger that the more modern Dream friends. This extreme power possibly stems from Sunny making him with the belief that if he was going to keep HEADSPACE safe, he needed to be unbeatable.

But ROWAN is far from invincible...

PERSONALITY

On the surface, ROWAN is the physical image of a rebellious teenager, he's rude and crude, cocky to the point of overconfidence, He resents being told what to do and has a short temper that leads to bouts of violence.

But look deeper and you see someone who cares deeply about his friends and his given duty to protect his home. ROWAN will do whatever it takes to keep those he cares about out of harm. He encourages his friends to live how they want to live, no matter what they're told.

He's also been known to be quite the prankster, often ringing KEL in along with his schemes and causing trouble, (Vandalizing SWEETHEART'S CASTLE being just one)

ROWAN'S weapon of choice is his trusty Shovel lovingly named 'Beethoven', after his favorite genre of music. He is highly adept with the tool and can throw it like a spear or spin it around.

Sunny was inspired to create ROWAN from a drawing Kel made during Basil's eighth birthday of Basil as a superhero...

UNIQUE SKILL; RULEBREAKER: ROWAN can attack and use SKILLS at any time during BATTLES, even during the enemy's turn. Deals extra damage to SOMETHING enemies. When tagged as leader in the overworld, most enemies will run from the party.

[dogtoling]

how would you go about designing a sona-adjacent character for splatoon? I know I’m going with octoling bc I play as them exclusively and this is more a character made from my ingame avatar, but everything else has me indecisive.. sorry I know this is a vague question but I’m interested in hearing your thoughts

this is a cool question! I struggled with this for a really long time and have had MANY sona designs (which either got trashed or became separate characters over time). Really i think how you approach a sona is different for every person. sorry if this is incoherent as i'm typing at 6am from bed

So basically first thing is what are you planning on using the character for? For example in my case when I used to try making splatoon sonas I made them *too much* like me to the point where i didn't like them and they didn't really fit in the world or were interesting at all. But that's just talking personality-wise. I could make an extremely bland octopus guy who doesnt play Turf War or ever go anywhere but it's also like, what is even the point of having a Splatoon sona at that point. What you want to use your sona for kind of affects how they would ideally be in my opinion.

So the way I ended up designing my sona (Koira) was to have us share traits but not have them specifically BE me, which is an approach that I find works really well in creating a connection to a character while still letting them be a character of their own. I would refer to it as more like making a self-insert character to control in a setting rather than physically being there and feeling confined to being yourself if that makes sense? it probably doesnt. But the self-insert player character is kinda what you already do in Splatoon anyway.

I find it a good approach to go with a mix of aspects that are accurate to you but combined with things that are kind of out there. Then you can have a character that's still interesting and appealing to you and might seem similar enough at face value to be relatable, while not being like, super boring. I don't remember my exact design process with Koira, I wanted the design to be silly and stand out and be relatable to how I play the game and approach the series, while at the same time not being confined to what I would realistically do or be like. Like I do not own a labcoat in real life, or mismatched boots, or round shades.

But I DO own a pair of broken shades i found from a trash can, and in the context of being an avid squid researcher online I felt it would be very fitting to make my in-universe guy an actual squid scientist, and i WISH i had shoes like that because theyre pretty cool. And he has split ends because I DO have split ends (there are so many), but i don't have blonde hair. I picked yellow because it's my favorite color. I would NOT touch turf wars with a ten foot pole if i actually existed in the splatoon world and was the same person there that i am in real life, but like, in the context of Splatoon i might as well have my Splatoon guy represent some aspect of my gameplay experience, hence they own like every weapon but don't really play. Et cetera.

So really again people have different preferences with how to approach making a sona, or sona-adjacent characters like you said, personally the Player Character approach tends to work pretty well for me. I try to reflect my real physical in-the-flesh self less, because that's kind of boring (i literally already exist), and go for the more exaggerated version where some aspects represent me but it's not Literally Me. Like, I'm trying to make What If I Was An Octoling, and not What If An Octoling Looked Like Me The Human. The process of how to get there is a little patchy and again, probably different for everybody, and bear in mind that you might make a sona and not like it and start from scratch. That might happen 5 times. That might happen 10 times. You still learn something more about the process every time.

Here's some questions I can present to help with sona designing...

1. What are some traits that I think reflect myself? How can I include those in the character design?

2. In tandem with the previous question; what species should I pick? (You already picked Octoling, so this one is a bit obsolete - but it's worth thinking about for people who struggle to pick.)

3. If I existed in the Splatoon world, what would I probably, somewhat realistically be doing with my life? What kind of job or hobbies would I have? Can that be reflected in the design?

4. Do I care about any of the above stuff or do I just want to come up with something original? Could I use some of my answers to work with and fill in the blanks with other things that are just cool?

5. How would the ways I play Splatoon be reflected if translated to an in-universe character? (For example, based on how I play, my game-realistic Splatsona would just be a full-time Salmon Runner...)

6. Do I want to use in-game gearsets, or reference the kind of style I prefer in real life, or maybe come up with something unique?

7. Can my main weapon or playstyle be directly equated to my character's personality or appearance? Do I want their personality to be game-accurate, real life accurate or somewhere in between?

8. Finding inspiration through your player character's Badges, Banner and Title that you currently have; what do those say about the player? Or what about the locker?

9. What are some things I love about the setting of Splatoon that I could reflect in a sona or self insert? (For example I made mine an in-universe Inkling researcher to reflect my own obsessiveness about Inkling biology. And squid suckers. I have a dried squid in a minigrip bag on my shelf)

10. The obligatory step in any character design: Can i do something to make it fun or appealing to myself? Adding some flavor.

Aside from all that and I definitely forgot SOMETHING, my general character design tip is do not expect the first draft to be the final perfect result. I watched a video once that said to draw every character design Three Times before 'finalizing' it and it works EXTREMELY well when youre whipping up a character basically from scratch and have an idea in your head, but on paper, you just need some kind of first draft to see if that idea works. The second and third iterations usually help trim out whatever didnt work in the earlier designs and when you keep making more, the parts that DO work are solidified and refined over time.

Rule number 2: if you make a sona design and don't like it, ask yourself why. Then change it! It's not the time to start some kind of self reflecting journey, maybe you just want a more interesting haircut than what you have in real life and you can totally do that if you're bold (my hair is brown, I didn't want the splatoon to have brown hair when like half the point of the game is Neon Color). Maybe you want bright pink eyes. Maybe you want a ridiculous job that you could never do in real life but that would make your character way more interesting. Maybe you want to give them a pet slug because you would LOVE ONE in real life but dont have one, and that would complete the character.

i forgot my point but hopefully this helped and was useful even a little bit? yay

[20dollarlolita]

im trying to phrase this in a way that makes sense and isnt too long but its not working so: if i had a zelda print jsk but coorded it with all non zelda themed stuff, would it be cosplay lolita? (and also does this apply to the AP x Mario/Sailor Moon stuff?)

(the jsk is/will be made using ur tutorials btw!! you inspired me to keep sewing and designing through my Problems™️ - plus this means it'll have good lace and the right shape etc etc, im just curious if you as a person i appreciate from across the world have an opinion on fandom references vs cosplay)

So I did a post specifically on adapting Zelda looks into lolita fashion back in 2017.

And back in April when I was still able to stand, I did a coord with a Zelda print. I made the dress back in 2016 as part of a school project, but the coord involved a lot of new lolita fashion pieces that I've obtained since then. The bottom part of the skirt is the opening graphics from Wind Waker.

The really short answer is a JSK made with a printed fabric can be lolita and isn't a cosplay, but you need to make sure that the print is suitable for lolita fashion. I did a guide on that too.

But there's plenty of dresses with Sanrio characters that aren't Hello Kitty cosplays. An interesting brand to check out with regards to this is Secret Honey, who has a lot of disney tie-in dresses. You can see the difference between a themed dress and a cosplay dress.

Cosplay is cosplay. It's the art of dressing up as a character. In many cases, that's about creating or recreating specific garments worn in the source material. In cases where specific garments aren't being used, it's about looking like the character, and wearing clothing that is like what they could have worn. A good cosplay is going to go beyond just the garment and be a complete look, a head-to-toe costume.

Different from cosplay is things like Disneybounding, of which I guess the non-Disney version would be stealth cosplay. Disneybounding is dressing up in a way that resembles or reflects a character, without wearing a costume. This comes from Disney Parks policy that adults can't be wearing costumes in the park. A Disneybound look can distinctly resemble a character, but has to be constructed of modern(ish), mainstream(ish) garments. The whole look cannot be something that would look out of place at a Denny's at 2AM.

Themed lolita falls much more into Disneybounding than it does cosplay. The main difference is that a Disneybound look is composed of mainstream fashion pieces that resemble or remind you of a character. A themed lolita look is constructed out of pieces that can stand alone as lolita pieces, but that all fit a larger theme.

For an example on my coord up there, the skirt is a themed piece. The green linen was chosen specifically to look like Link's traditional green outfit, and the print is images from the game. My ocarina necklace is also a piece that I would not normally wear with a lolita look. However, the blouse is from Innocent World, a lolita brand. The overskirt was made by a lolita brand and was designed to be a lolita overskirt. The headbows aren't Zelda-themed and can be worn with other coordinates. The legwear was just going for color balance and doesn't actually add to the concept of the coord and objectively speaking, the bottom half of the coord is too punk-themed to really work with the top half of the coord. One of the really great things about wearing lolita fashion is that you can look at past looks, recognize that you like them, but also see things to improve on in the future. This is great because it allows you to experience wearing the same pieces repeatedly without wearing the same outfits repeatedly.

Regarding theme, a lot of brands have recurring themes and characters (Usakumya and Kuma Kumya are a good pair to start your research on). They make a lot of elements that are themed after these characters, but those pieces are themed lolita pieces, and not cosplay. (If anyone has ever done an actual Usakumya cosplay, please let me know ASAP. I need to see that).

Many people who wear lolita fashion are also cosplayers, and so the community has really tried to stop using "cosplay" as a negative term to describe poorly done lolita. You'll run into "cosplay lolita" still used in context of characters like Wednesday or Misa Amane, where the author or artist decided that they wear "gothic lolita" and didn't actually do a ton of research.

This means that people who wear their source material's "gothic lolita" look are really wearing a poorly-researched outfit made by someone who didn't really know what they're doing. People will also use the term "cosplay lolita" to describe a poorly-researched outfit made by someone who didn't really know what they were doing, as if "that's the sort of outfit you'd see as a cosplay of a character." However, it's a term that's falling out of favor and really isn't very nice to cosplayers who often spend a LOT of money and time on their cosplays.

[twilightknight17]

Today on P3R

LOOK AT HIM

LOOK AT HIS BOXING GLOVES, OMG, I DIDN’T REALIZE THEY’D BE LITERAL JACKS.

Also we take exams I guess.

Turns out Ikutsuki is not going to help me study alone, he’s going to wrangle everyone into one big study group. Dunno how effective the studying is when he and Junpei get into a pun-off, but whatever. It’s nice to have everyone together and not fighting.

...This is on my exam? For real? This school, man…

Once exams are over, we make plans to go do something fun. While Yukari leaves to get Fuuka, Junpei and I have a little chat.

I love that you can play Minato as a completely oblivious airhead. But I do not.

On our way outside, Ikutsuki introduces us to our new dorm-mate, Ken, who will be staying with us over the summer. He has potential, so he might be a good candidate for joining SEES!

...Ikutsuki, recruiting teenagers with attitude is one thing, but you’re crossing the line towards “child soldiers”, my guy. I know Wild Cards have awakened at age 7, but they didn’t actually have to do stuff til they were 16 or 17!

He’s gonna be staying in the dorm, so we’re not allowed to mention shadows or fighting or whatever in front of him. Even though Ikutsuki just mentioned “the potential” in front of him. Akihiko also looked really uncomfortable around him, and it’s clear he knows Ken somehow, so… Yeah.

Ikutsuki sends me off to the antique shop that’s now open, because the antique shop can help me. The same way the police officer helps, apparently.

This lady runs the weapon fusion menu, and also where I can exchange all my gemstones I’ve been getting. She knows Officer Kurosawa, and ALSO explicitly knows about shadows?? What has Ikutsuki told you, ma’am? Were you involved ten years ago? Do you know about Tarta--

Oh I want that megidolaon skill card so bad. God. Don’t show me that when I know I won’t be able to afford it for ages.

Anyway, we are off to Yakushima, and Mitsuru’s vacation home is enormous. I wish we got to actually run around in it, but what we do see is pretty nice.

(Wait, wasn’t Ken moving in? Did we just leave him at the dorm alone??)

Mitsuru I didn’t realize your dad was Big Bos-- *shot*

Junpei wants to go to the beach right away, so we put our stuff in our rooms and book it down there. It’s gorgeous.

...

...Akihiko, uh…

Thank you, Junpei.

Akihiko doesn’t get it. He just wore them because they’re “better” for swimming. Because of course he’s gonna train on vacation. *sigh*

Why is Mitsuru so pretty I’m gonna die

Yakushima really is beautiful and I’m kinda sad I couldn’t cut off the UI for a minute.

Elizabeth asked me to bring her back something from the beach. I found a pretty shell, some driftwood, a piece of weird seaweed, and…

...she will LOVE this crab. I have to.

Mitsuru talks to her dad, and I have made an exciting discovery: A living, onscreen parent who does not suck!

He wants her to open up to others more and work together, because…

That’s a pretty good motto, actually. It would help if people playing this game knew what the Nanjo Group was. And despite being in green, meaning it has a definition in the glossary, the glossary just explains the motto again. X’D

The Nanjo Group is where the Kirijo Group got all it’s psience tech from, because they bought out SEBEC after Kandori tried to become god back in 1996. SEBEC had the original prototypes for anti-shadow suppression weapons, and PROBABLY also the teleporter technology from the DEVA System. I think I mentioned before that I think that’s what the teleporters in Tartarus are based on.

Plus, the Nanjo family is all about being Number One, so “two in harmony” is a pretty good shot at them. And that’s definitely lost if you don’t know anything about them. X’’’D

Mr. Kirijo gathers everyone together, because he’s going to tell us the truth. And the truth is, his father was trying to create a time manipulation machine. So it makes sense that their research fucked up time so badly that there’s an extra hour of the day now. But apparently, that attempt to create time manipulation warped into something worse over the course of the project, and Yukari’s dad caused the explosion to stop him.

Yukari is completely freaked out by this realization, because she’d always maintained that the accident wasn’t her dad’s fault. So hearing that he caused it on purpose sends her reeling, and she runs off. Minato follows her to the beach to talk, and it’s a good conversation, actually.

Thanks, it’s the trauma. ^_^

Thank you, P3R, for actually letting me hug people when they’re upset. Looking at you, P5, as Futaba and Sumi just cry in front of me and I can’t do anything.

The next day, the girls are on an awkward nature hike (because Mitsuru and Yukari aren’t speaking), when they get a call from Ikutsuki.

“Vehicle”????

There’s a lab on this island?

Sir you have one job how are you so bad at it??

The boys, meanwhile, are once again at the beach for Operation Ba--

Oh. Are we not calling it Operation Babe Watch? Okay.

It’s playing the Tartarus music. I’m trying to lead my team into the ocean and it’s not working.

We manage nothing but failure all the way across the beach. We’ve got girls who aren’t interested, girls who are pissy that high-schoolers are at the island resort (who then get even more pissy when they find out we’re at a friend’s summer home, because THEY had to save up to come here), girls who humor us for like ten minutes before revealing they have boyfriends…

And then one last lady, who has been observing, and reads us all to absolute filth about how our tactics are all wrong.

She might be interested, though. And she wants us to help put on sunscreen!

...300K yen-a-bottle sunscreen.

To protect from artificial sun rays…

Because…

Time for a tactical retreat. Thank god the last girl on the beach is so pretty.

She doesn’t want to talk to anyone, though. Except Minato. And runs off when the others approach. They seem to think she ran away because I said something to her, and want me to follow her and apologize. Which, guys, I don’t think chasing girls you don’t know into the woods is the right answer here, but okay. Here we go.

There’s a waterfall up here and I can’t go near it. :(

...believe me, Yukari, I have no idea what’s happening either.

Apparently this is the “vehicle” Ikutsuki lost.

I’m okay with bringing her home with us. XD

Speaking of home, back at home, Shinji is trading information with those three weirdo assassins in exchange for some kind of pills, which can’t be a good sign because he looks like he’s in actual pain. Weirdo Squad is angry that we want to destroy the Dark Hour because they like having special powers.

They also call Tartarus the “Tower of Demise”, though, so like obviously they realize this is a bad thing.

After we get back from Yakushima, Aigis tries to stay in my room, including waking me up five minutes before my alarm. Which. No. You cannot stay in here. Oh god. My new robot has separation anxiety.

My social links may not be deals for things that can help in battle, but they do make me feel warm and fuzzy.

I go out with Akihiko again because he still owes me food for last time, and we get accosted by the punks from before, who have returned with an even bigger group, because apparently the best way to win is by fighting a guy eight-on-one. Are you proud of yourself, dude? Does that make you feel cool?

We didn’t actually fight because we distracted them long enough to get out of there, so no police this time. But I did learn that Akihiko does have parents! He has foster parents that love him and send him enough expensive snacks to share with the whole dorm. It’s nice. ^_^

My online friend in my MMO is definitely a teacher at my school, based on her complaining about "Mr. E". Which, you and me both lady. Dude thinks he's a wizard or something.

Speaking of Mr. Edogawa, he mentioned Carl Jung in class! While talking about alchemists, because school is still insane. Literally we’re going on summer break tomorrow, give it a rest.

Which I guess is why Ken hadn’t moved in yet, but… Did we miss like a week of school while we were in Yakushima? Hot damn.

Ken is officially moved in now, though, and despite not being able to discuss shadows or the Dark Hour around him, he apparently knows Aigis is a robot. So… Uh… How secretive are we supposed to be being?

And it FINALLY let me go back to Tartarus and check out the new area, which is very industrial. It’s cool. Very different vibe from the big faces. I actually like it.

New portal doors that lead to Grand Clocks now have a chance to show up, so I can boost teammates’ levels to match Minato’s? Which is interesting. And more importantly, new “Monad” doors are appearing that lead to stronger fights.

Calling it Monad makes me a little weirded out, but hey, it's not a mandala and there’s good treasure in here. So we’re probably going in headfirst every time they show up. XDD

Saved back at the Tartarus entrance, so next time is probably just going to be some more fighting. We’ll see. ^_^