#had a pretty rough day lately. so i doodled first two pictures as comforting thing

[cutestknife]

Midnight doodles

[love101imagines]

Way too much

request: could u pls write a imagine with Sinan,I was thinking about him and you being the best childhood friends, but they ended up getting away a lot, so some teacher spends a double job and chooses them to do it together, so they spend a lot of time together and discover that they still like each other

tag list: @zaynlikfalls @wwafangirld @girl-looking-out-window

If you asked Sinan if he had ever been happy he wouldn't answer. However, his mind would go back to the time when he was six and he used to spend every hour with his best friend, meeting you since you two lived in the same neighborhood and we’re the same age. You, the girl he used to play around on the park under his grandpa's care, the same one he used to watch cartoons with until you two fell asleep on his couch, and the one he used to play wrestle until one of you ended up with an accidental bloody nose or a broken tooth.

You were also each other's first kiss, the result of a dare when you two were nine and you wanted to know what it felt like after you watched a romantic movie.

Everything changed when you turned twelve when it was one of those nights your parents were out and you two would stay up late watching horror movies. With a blanket covering most of your face and eyes glued to the TV, you didn't notice how Sinan was looking at you.

When a jumpscare happened and you yelped, immediately grabbing his hand, he blushed slightly, finally realizing he was in love with you. And it terrified him. Even more than the old movie you were watching on the couch in your living room.

He felt his heart breaking when a few days later you arrived at his house on the verge of tears because your dad had received an offer for a better job in Ankara and you would be moving in some weeks. The only thing he could do was hug you, trying to calm you down as you continued crying into his shoulder.

That had to be one of the many disappointments he would face during his life, but he slowly got used to it, expecting people to always leave him, just like you did.

"You're staring." Eda pointed out, a smirk on her face as she leaned against the wall behind her. "Who are you looking at?"

Sinan gulped, back to reality before he looked away. "No one." He snapped in an annoyed tone.

Eda rolled her eyes, letting out an exasperated sigh as she went back to the drawing on the wall. He mentally cursed himself as he looked back at the group of girls standing nearby, no sign of the girl who had been his best friend for almost seven years. His mind had to be playing games on him, probably from drinking too many that day. There was no way you were at school, he must have seen someone similar.

He didn't have much time to think about it, focusing on the ticket Osman was handing to him for a concert.

"I'm off to the infirmary to sleep." He announced, already feeling a migraine he didn't have any intention of increasing.

Taking slow steps, he walked away from the group. The ticket was in his shirt's pocket, and he only had one thing in mind as he walked through the halls. To stop the feeling on the pit of his stomach after thinking about you in months and to sleep.

"Sinan!"

He didn't even get a chance to fully turn around before you crashed into him, standing on your tiptoes so you could wrap your arms around his neck. He didn't recognize you for a second, believing someone was about to punch him when he heard his name being called but he didn't even have time to flinch.

It was only a second though before his eyes widened and he wrapped his arms around your waist, finding comfort in the fact that nobody else was around and you two were the only ones standing next to the infirmary's door. Feeling you hug him again definitely was one of the best feelings in the world.

"(Y/N)?" He asked, chills running up his spine at the feeling of your skin against his.

You pulled away after a few seconds, even if you were sure the whole hug lasted for at least two minutes until he let you go. "The one and only." You teased.

You took a minute to get a good look at him, your hand still lingering on his shoulder. He looked...well, you didn't care about the bags under his eyes or the fact that his breath smelled of alcohol, the only thing that mattered was that you were with him again.

Sinan looked at you up and down too. Your hair was a bit shorter, not in your usual braids that you used to wear all the time. Your cheeks weren't as chubby as before and your legs weren't as skinny, and the small scar on your upper lip was faded almost completely, just like the one on the bridge of his nose.

But still, you were beautiful. That was undeniable.

You gave him a toothy grin, the same one you used to have all the time when you were kids. "It's so good to finally see you again. I missed you so much."

He nodded, a soft smile on his face as he looked at you, any thought about the migraine already gone. "When did you come back?"

As you started your rant about your father finding another job offer here in Istanbul and coming back a week ago, his mind couldn't help but drift off that you hadn't seen each other in years and many things had happened in between. His parents had abandoned him, he had turned into an alcoholic and he was about to be expelled. You, on the other hand, didn't know any of this, and he was sure you would look at him in disgust once you found out he wasn't the same twelve-year-old you had trusted with your whole life before.

He didn't even notice Osman calling him to meet when the rest until you tugged in his arm.

"What?" He asked emotionless turning to the taller boy.

Osman didn't seem to care, already used to his attitude. "Eda convinced Miss Burcu, we need to find a way to convince Coach Kemal."

Convincing Coach Kemal couldn't matter less to him, glancing at you because he wanted to take advantage of the fact that you still believed that he was the sweet boy who you had grew up with. It wouldn’t last for long, but he wanted to at least enjoy that time until you were disappointed.

You only gave him a reassuring smile. "Go on, I have to fix some things about my schedule but I'll see you later. We have a lot of catching up to do."

A bit less unsure than before, he nodded, giving you one last smile that lasted a second before he left, his heart pounding with so much force he didn't know how the rest couldn't feel it.

While Kerem was busy talking to their teacher, it didn't take much for him to run into you again, sharing your same classes. Even if most of the time he slept through Chemistry class without anyone bothering him, his brows furrowed as soon as he heard someone sitting next to him.

You only chuckled after waking the boy up, Sinan's face softening immediately. "Um, rough day?" You asked, not sure of what to say once you noticed the flask near his bag.

He shrugged, slowly leaving it inside his bag and taking out a notebook, trying to show that he cared about school even if he truly didn't anymore. Nevertheless, your bubbly attitude surely did something to him. It was like you two had never been separated before while the rest of your new classmates didn't understand why the new girl was hanging out with him, the depressed boy who mocked everyone.

It was to his luck that your teacher chose you two to work together on an assignment. Of course, you were happy, thinking you could make up for all the lost time and he allowed himself to feel happy too, even if he knew he'd fuck it up like he always did.

"So?" You started the next day as you two walked towards your home.

He raised a brow at you, his hands fumbling with the hem of his shirt. "So what?"

You rolled your eyes in a teasing way. "I want to know everything that happened since I left. My parents didn't tell me anything because they're busy with their new jobs and we haven't had time to talk. How are your parents?" You added, mindlessly looking at the colorful neighborhood you were walking past.

It was a loaded question and Sinan thought for a moment, waiting for you to find your keys in your bag. "They got divorced."

You almost dropped your keys in surprise, not knowing what to say like when you found him with his flask. "Oh." You mumbled, awkwardly opening the door for both of you. "I'm really sorry, I didn't know."

"It's fine." He brushed it off, not wanting things to change and be more awkward. "I've been living with my grandpa since I turned fourteen." He explained as he followed after you, taking off his shoes just like you were doing.

"How is he?" You asked with a smile, with a better mood knowing that the older man who used to take care of you two when you were younger was still alive.

"You know him, he doesn't die." He said, earning a slap to his arm.

You two ended up sitting on the floor of your room, a few books next to you, and a music cassette in the background. It felt like when you were seven, and he would trace out different pictures and you would giggle and try to bump his hand out of the way to color it in.

"What was Ankara like?" He asked as he turned the pages trying to look for something.

You continued highlighting a few phrases sitting in front of him. “Um, nice I think. I met a lot of people, went to a few parties, the school was pretty good.”

He glanced at you, absentmindedly doodling on his notebook. “Did you have fun in the city?” He asked sarcastically.

You punched his arm in a teasing way. “Yeah, but there wasn’t anyone like you.”

You only received a small smile before you sighed and moved over to sit next to him, knowing that he didn’t take notes and this was the most he had done in months.

“I have a question for you.” You told him.

“Go ahead.” He answered, still calm which was weird.

If someone else had asked him something personal he wouldn’t have answered or he would have given a sarcastic answer, but you were the one who was asking him. He could never snap at you.

You grinned at him. “How much did you miss me?”

He sighed, turning to look at you with a small sparkle on his eyes. “Way too much.”

It was in that moment with your smile that a small glimmer of hope built inside of him. It didn’t seem to bother you that he slept through most lessons, or that he showed up at school with messy hair and his tie undone, or that he always had his flask close to him. He hadn’t even taken a sip since you approached him that day so you two could go to your house.

“I tried to write to you.” He started, eyes directed to the floor so he didn’t have to meet your eyes. “My mum gave me your new address but...I always ended up crumpling them up and throwing them away.”

When you left, he used to write a letter every day, always trying to find the right words to express how much he missed you and to express his true feelings whenever he thought about you. It helped a bit to pour out all the feelings he didn’t know how to tell you in person, but out of fear of rejection or of ruining what was left of the two of you he never sent them, destroying them completely.

You furrowed your brows confused. “Why?”

A few seconds passed, your music being the only sound in the room.

You bit the inside of your cheek, fumbling with the hem of your skirt, knowing that things had changed between the two of you. “Sinan, it’s fine, I know that it’s been years since we...”

“Are you going to leave again?” He interrupted you, a hint of anger on his voice.

“What?” You blurted out.

“You left once, it wouldn’t surprise me if you did again.” He continued, a scowl on his face.

You crossed your arms, trying to act firm in front of him. “Are you serious? We were twelve, I didn’t have any choice and you know that.”

You stayed like that for a while, no trace of a smile on your face and a hard look on his until he gave up.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled. “It’s just, I...I don’t want to lose you again.” He admitted, vulnerability palpable on his voice.

You found yourself wrapping your arms around his shoulders again, hugging him for the second time in the same week. He didn’t seem to mind, his arms holding you by your waist and keeping you close to him.

“I won’t leave.” You added softly. “I promise.”

You tried to pull back to look at him, but it was to no avail, his grip on your waist tightening with each passing second. “Sinan.” You muttered, your hands finding his.

He was painfully aware of how close you are to him. It was like a deja vu from when you kissed for the first time, and with your eyes fixed on him, you didn’t even notice that one of his hands that was on your waist moved to the back of your neck until he was kissing you.

After you closed your eyes, you smiled against his lips. The kiss was slow, and you left your hands on his neck, bringing him closer. He didn’t pull away until you finally did for air, placing your forehead against his shoulder with your eyes closed, feeling your heart beat in your ears.

You weren’t seven anymore, you were now teens who could admit why you felt so comfortable around each other, or why one of the bests things of your day was to talk to him.

“About time.” You mumbled with a smirk, and he thought the same.

About fucking time.

[wheresmynaya]

Lost in the Lights Ch.2 | Brittana

Okay so I’m breaking routine here by posting another chapter so soon but I’m just blown away by the response so far and I got excited. LIKE WOAH, I really thought I wasn’t going to reach many people with this bc like...sports. Guess we all just really love Brittana, huh?

Also, 9-0 baby! 😘

Available on ff.net (x) ao3 (x) 

No one is more surprised by the discovery of the Titans’ new quarterback than Santana. Actually, surprised doesn’t even begin to cover it. Santana’s flat out dumbfounded by the news.

Is it the fact that they’ve never had a female Titan, let alone a female QB? Is it the fact that she’s actually really good? Is it the fact that it’s Brittany?

Santana’s at a loss.

The blonde just didn’t strike her as the type to play such a rough sport. She’s like this walking ray of sunshine that irks Santana to no end and she’s only had to deal with her for like a week! No one would’ve ever guessed that Brittany was the one to lead the Titans to their first win but maybe that’s because there’s apparently this side of her that Santana just hadn’t seen yet?

Judging by the way Brittany dominated on the field, Santana had her all wrong.

Santana spends her entire weekend trying to stay on top of her tan before the Autumn chill sets in, but in between sips of cold sweet tea and scrolling through her social media feeds there’s Brittany. Again, she doesn’t know why the quarterback keeps disrupting her thoughts, but it seems like she can’t outrun the girl.

At the moment, Brittany’s everywhere Santana looks! Mainly on social media; one minute Santana’s liking a picture Quinn posted of them before the game on Friday and the next she’s being bombarded by shots of Brittany posing with her teammates. Mike and Sam basically make the same exact post with the whole New Year New QB, but what surprises her is that even Puck is on her feed doing the same thing!

To think that the guys would even allow having a female quarterback is beyond her, because the last time she checked they were all a bunch of sexist pigs. Then again, maybe Coach Beiste has finally taught them all a thing or two about respecting women enough to be okay with playing alongside them?

Santana has no idea.

It’s just crazy how this girl seems to have popped up out of nowhere and now Santana can’t get away even when she’s not at school. The weekends are sacred to her, it’s her time to relax and reset before having to deal with all the McKinley High imbeciles but seeing so much of Brittany has her thoughts running nonstop.

What’s worse is that Santana can’t describe why she’s so annoyed by it all!

\\

It isn’t until Monday rolls around that things finally start to come to a head.

The Titans’ recent win still seems to be the only thing anyone at McKinley wants to talk about, but Santana manages to evade all those conversations. She doesn’t know anything about the game other than the Titans have sucked for most of her high school career but she’s still obligated to cheer for them.

It’s a small price to pay when you’re a real winner. The Cheerios have way more titles and that’s really the only thing Santana cares about.

It’s all apart of her master plan to get the hell out of Lima once she graduates. With several National Championship wins under her belt, along with being Co-Captain since Sophomore year, Santana’s hoping it’ll help to expand her university options.

Although, she knows her future is practically mapped out for her – deep down she still has hope for a miracle. Until then, she just wants to make sure she’s well-prepared for anything which means retaining her position on the squad and making good grades.  

\\

Santana goes through the motions of the school day as usual, and as usual she fights the inescapable feeling of giddiness as she makes her way towards her final class of the day. She doesn’t actually mind the class – Miss Holliday is secretly one of her favorite teachers at McKinley – but she’s not the blonde that’s making her stomach fill with fluttery things.

She’s barely taken two steps into the room when she spots Brittany already sitting at their shared desk. She had been resting her chin in her palm looking bored as ever until Santana walked in. That’s when Brittany perked up and turned on her signature mega-watt smile.

It was getting harder and harder for Santana to scowl at the sight of it.

“Hi!” Brittany greeted happily as Santana took a seat next to her, “How was your weekend?”

It was always the same with Brittany, no matter what kind of look Santana threw her way. Brittany never seemed to be fazed by her grumpiness. She just took it in stride and continued to try and make conversation even if Santana never gave her much to work with.

Maybe that’s why Santana’s drawn to the blonde? She doesn’t scare easily unlike most at the school who wouldn’t dare be so persistent.

“Fine,” Santana answered with a sigh of indifference while she got settled and took out her binder and pen.

“Awesome,” Brittany nodded and picked up her own pen to start doodling, “I had good weekend too. I went to the park, did some chores around the house, hung out with some guys from the team and – “

The team caused a crack in Santana’s façade.

She looked to Brittany, trying to figure out how the girl sitting next to her was the same fierce player she saw Friday night. With the confusion and curiosity that’s been building ever since, the words just came tumbling out of her before she could catch them.

“You’re our new QB,” Santana stated but it sounded more like an accusation than an observation.

Brittany’s brows rose and a coy smile began to spread across her lips, “So you can say more than two words?”

Santana rolled her eyes at the sarcasm but even more so at how that smile made her stomach flip. She really needed to get her shit together.

“But yeah,” Brittany added coolly, “Seems like I am.”

Santana looked down at her binder, “You didn’t say.”

“You didn’t ask,” Brittany replied just as quickly.

Before Santana could get wrapped up in that giddy feeling again, she hardened herself. She was starting to see how Brittany could keep up with the guys on the team, the girl was quick and she had confidence.

Santana liked that…or whatever.

“Sup dudes!” Miss Holliday greeted the class as she strolled in just after the bell, “Is this Monday dragging or what?”

Some kids grunted in agreement. Brittany chuckled away and Miss Holliday smirked up at her.

“Awesome game, Chica!” Miss Holliday complimented as she walked down their row closest to Brittany. She held out her fist for Brittany to bump, “You kicked butt out there.”

“Thanks,” Brittany replied sweetly as their fists connected, “It was a team effort.”

“Spoken like a true leader. About time we got a little girl power in this school,” Miss Holliday nodded approvingly before moving down the row.

Santana watched Brittany giggle then get swept up in listening to Miss Holliday’s instructions for the warm-up activity. Again, Santana found herself in awe of how Brittany was the same girl who could break tackles and fire a football downfield. Brittany was friendly and soft and diplomatic, nothing like any of the guys on the team.

“You’re staring,” Brittany pointed out although her gaze remained on Miss Holliday now standing at the front of the class setting up the projector.

Santana doesn’t know why, but Brittany’s comment makes her cheeks burn.

She was glad when one of the kids closest to the door was asked to turn off the lights. In the darkness, she found some comfort and a little confidence. She was able to get a grip and act like a normal person.

“We’ve never had a female QB before,” Santana whispered. She had her pen in hand, trying to follow along with everyone else by doing the activity but her focus was elsewhere.

“So I’ve heard,” Brittany replied just as softly.

Santana didn’t know what to say next; this was the most they’ve spoken to each other thus far and she really didn’t know where the conversation was going.

What she didn’t anticipate though was fucking it all up with one sentence.

“Girls,” Santana breathed out and for some reason the word made the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. She didn’t realize she hadn’t said it in awhile, maybe not since seeing…  

Santana swallows hard at the memory trying to worm its way in. She pushes it to the back of her mind; now isn’t the time for it.  

“Girls,” She repeats herself with a steadier voice, “They aren’t supposed to play football.”

When Brittany looks at her, the friendly smile is gone and her pretty blue eyes are darker and fill with disbelief.

Santana knows she said the wrong thing the second the words leave her lips. It’s not exactly what she meant, but it’s too late to take it back now. Her words have already done the damage.  

“Huh,” Brittany scoffs and averts her eyes back to her work, “Didn’t expect to hear that coming from you.”

Santana frowns – mostly out of guilt – but her instincts have her on the defense, “What’s that suppose to mean?”

She watches Brittany’s jaw tighten before she’s turning to look at Santana again. Her brows knit together, “It means I didn’t think you were the small-minded type.”

Santana feels winded.

She’s been called many things in her life and has heard some creative insults aimed at her, but never has she ever been called small-minded. She’s surprised by how much that one actually hurts. After everything she went through last year, after all the backlash, after having to deal with real small-minded people she feels a little offended. She can’t be lumped in with them. It’s not possible, because she’s…

The word gets trapped her throat and Santana has to swallow hard again to steady herself.

She isn’t like everyone else.

On second thought, maybe she is if she’s still saying something like that?

“I’ve always been told that those who can play the game well should,” Brittany tells her firmly, “I think I’m someone that can and judging by your team’s standings for the past three years, you could use someone like me on that field.”

Santana gulps. She can’t remember the last time someone at this school spoke to her the way Brittany is. It’s not a tone she’s familiar with, but she knows she deserves it.

“I don’t know you very well, but I thought – I don’t know – I thought you’d at least be a little more accepting than the hicks I’ve come across in this town,” Brittany continues, “I guess I was wrong.”

Santana’s lips part to defend herself, but nothing comes out.

Brittany doesn’t notice, “It shouldn’t matter if I’m a girl or a boy or a damn alien from outer space. If you can play – if you want to play – then you should, no matter what the sport is. Anyone that thinks otherwise is just…well, they’re stupid.”

The last word has Brittany’s voice cracking and the sound finally has Santana sputtering for an explanations, “I – I didn’t mean to – “

“You should probably just pay attention to the board, Santana.”

Santana bites her lip at Brittany’s clipped tone – that might’ve been the first time she’s ever heard Brittany say her name. She does as she’s told though. It’s best if she doesn’t dig herself a deeper hole.

\\

Santana spends the rest of the day mulling over Brittany's words. Even through Cheerios practice after school, Santana can’t seem to get her head on right.

Maybe she really has become a product of her environment? Maybe all the small-minded people she's surrounded by have somehow managed to rub off on her after all of these years?

That can’t be the case, can it?

She hates that she has to ask herself that. Usually, Santana’s not one to have any regrets or remorse once she spits out her vicious words but this time she finds herself backpedaling when it comes to Brittany. She wasn’t trying to be a bitch, it just sort of happened and for once in her life she feels kind of horrible about it.

\\

“You okay?” Quinn asks hesitantly after she dismissed the squad for a water break. Santana was meant to lead warm-ups today but Quinn seemed more eager to take over and Santana didn’t mind considering she’s so distracted.

“Yeah,” Santana shrugs, “I’m fine.”

“You’re quiet today,” Quinn notes, “You didn’t even laugh when Bec accidentally called Coach Sylvester sir.”

Santana tries to mask her worries and shrugs again, “She’s not that far off, have you seen Coach lately? Very mannish.”

Quinn smirks, pleased to seemingly have her best friend back, “So true.”

Just then Coach Sylvester blows her whistle and barks orders at the squad. Santana’s reluctant to move, but she pushes herself up anyway.

“God,” She groans as they walk over to the others, “I’m over this year and it hasn’t even started.”

“Same,” Quinn chuckles, “Let’s go make fun of the JV squad later? I hear they need a ton of work and their practices runs longer than ours because they suck so much.”

If it were any other day, that suggestion would have Santana eager to get a front row seat but even that doesn’t help. Still, she has to retain some sort of normalcy even if thoughts of Brittany are trying their hardest to disrupt that.

“I can’t wait to see that train wreck,” Santana quips and together, she and her best friend fall in line with the rest of the squad.

\\

The remainder of the week is more of the same: class, Cheerios practice, homework then repeat. The only thing that’s out of the ordinary for Santana is the icy, cold shoulder Brittany’s giving her now.

Or maybe Santana’s the one avoiding her?

It’s all minor details. What’s important is that they aren’t speaking to each other anymore and Santana’s starting to miss Brittany’s usual cheerful greetings.

She knows what she needs to do to fix this. It doesn’t make it any easier for her to actually do it though. To admit that she was wrong, to apologize for her words, to accept responsibility for her actions? Santana’s not use to most of that!

It’s a weird kind of tension though between her and Brittany, so Santana’s not sure how much more she can take. Instead, she steals sideways glances in the dark and hopes Brittany takes pity on her and makes the first move.

Brittany doesn’t and soon one week’s worth of silence ends up turning into two.

\\

Santana had every intention of making amends by last Friday’s game, but things just kept coming up. There’s class and Cheerios practice, but now she actually has to study for upcoming quizzes and assignments. She can’t fall behind again so once practice ends, Santana usually gets changed right away and heads straight for her car without even glancing in the Titans’ direction.

Is she using schoolwork as a lame excuse to avoid dealing with her shit? Of course, she’s a teenager. Procrastination comes naturally to her!

\\

Later that night, Santana sits with both of her parents at the table for dinner. It’s a rare occasion to have Maribel and Hector home at the same time, but that quickly loses its novelty when Hector starts to grill Santana on her studies.

“Papi, it’s only the third week,” Santana gently reasons.

“And?” Hector gives her a stern look, “You need to stay on top of things, Santana.”

It’s a simple sentence, but Santana feels like there’s way more beneath the surface. Sometimes it’s hard being the daughter of a successful doctor whose father was also a doctor and his father before him. There is a long line of them in the Lopez legacy and that looms over Santana like a dark cloud, especially now that she’s in her Senior year.

It’s gone without saying whose footsteps Santana will follow, but it’s still a lot of pressure for her. It’s only a matter of time before her dad begins to lecture her again about college and the importance of good grades and extracurriculars while her mom tries to elevate some of that stress.

She’s never met two people who show their love for someone so differently.

“Don’t put too much pressure on her,” Maribel says and squeezes Santana’s hand from across the table lovingly, “You’re doing fine, mija.”

Hector frowns at his wife, “Fine isn’t enough. You think any of these Ivy League schools care about fine? Of course not. They’re going through thousands of applicants a year and fine doesn’t stand out. Fine doesn’t get into Harvard.”

Maribel narrows her eyes at his rambling.

“Don’t give me that look,” Hector huffs but his voice softens as he looks to Santana, “You know what I’m talking about.”

Santana can already guess what he’s about to say. She’s heard it so many times before.

“You can’t get complacent, Santana. You have a lot to make up for,” Hector adds just as Santana knew he would, “Especially after the year you’ve had.”

“That’s an understatement,” Santana mumbles as she pushes food around on her plate.

“What was that?” Hector raises a challenging brow.

“It’s nothing,” Santana dismisses and smiles reassuringly at her dad, “I’m on top of everything this year, Papi. I promise, you don’t have to worry. I won’t disappoint you.”

When Hector matches her smile, Santana feels a little relief even if it only lasts for a moment.

\\

It isn’t until they’re nearing the end of the third week of school when things on the Brittany-front begin to shift for Santana. They still aren’t speaking to each other, but the blonde practically pops up everywhere she goes – if not physically, then someone’s bound to be talking about her.

After securing a second win for the Titans, Brittany has quickly climbed the ranks on the popularity ladder. The buzz around her grows, but what’s odd is that despite her obvious talents and annoyingly charming smile the students of McKinley have mixed feelings about her.

More importantly, about having a female quarterback.

On her walks to class, Santana has overheard the murmurs of doubt in Brittany’s abilities. Some are frustrated at how a new kid was able to dethrone Finn Hudson who has been leading the team all of her high school career. Some think Coach Beiste is getting soft. Some think it’s all a hoax, but Santana doesn’t really understand that one.

Regardless of how they feel about her though, Brittany’s still able to part crowds any time she walks down the hall. It doesn’t look like she pays them any mind, but Santana’s been wrong about her before.

But with popularity comes the irritating gossip mongers and Santana happens to overhear Brittany’s first encounter with McKinley’s most annoying: Jacob Ben Israel.

\\\\\

Between her morning runs, class, football practice, weight training, homework and helping out with Pete, Brittany’s having a hard time finding a moment to relax. She should be use to the hectic schedule by now, but making the change from her old school’s system to Lima’s is throwing her off a little. The school days start earlier, football practices run later and the work is a little harder than she use to.

Then there’s everything going on with Santana and that might be the most frustrating.

For nearly two weeks, they’ve kept this thing between them going. Did Brittany overreact by saying what she said? She doesn’t think so. Maybe Santana didn’t think what she said to her was a big deal, but to Brittany it was. The things people say to her in Lima aren’t anything knew, but that doesn’t mean she’s immune to their sting.

Most times, she’s able to ignore them but it just hits differently when she hears the utter disbelief coming from a fellow female. It’s like, whatever happened to empowering and uplifting each other? Did Santana not grow up listening to the Spice Girls? Has she never watched She’s the Man? Bend it like Beckham? A League of their own?

It’s so irritating because she can’t even ask Santana, the girl avoids her like the plague! The only time they’re ever close enough is in English class and that’s only because they have to share a table.

\\

Brittany’s tired and achy and she’s so wrapped up in her thoughts as shuffles through her locker for her textbook for next class that she doesn’t notice she is no longer alone.

“Brittany Pierce!” Brittany hears someone say and the sound makes her flinch, “You’ve become quite the celebrity.”

She leans back slowly and peeks around her locker door to find a rather dorky looking guy with a huge cloud of hair. She notices the mic in his hand next and is instantly confused.

Is she on tv?

“Who are you?” She asks and glances around unsurely for a camera.

“Jacob Ben Israel,” He says and holds out his hand for her to shake, “Some call me JBI for short. I’m McKinley’s #1 source for news and the hottest gossip.”

Brittany shakes his hand; it’s grossly warm and sweaty as hell but she’s not surprised judging by the look of him. He certainty isn’t dressed like a journalist or one of those news reporters she has seen on tv.

She can hear her dad’s voice in her head chastising her for judging a book by its cover so she gives JBI a polite smile, “Oh okay. Nice to meet you.”

She goes to turn back to her locker, but JBI is quick to start the questions.

“So you’re the first female QB here at McKinley High. You’re new to the school and you’re the first to ever bench Finn Hudson and you’ve already led the Titans to their second victory this year. Hoping for a third this Friday?” JBI pauses and holds out the mic for Brittany.

She clears her throat, she’s not sure where the camera is so she just looks at him, “Of course. There are a lot of really great players on the team and I’m confident we can win a lot more games this season.”  

“Awesome,” JBI replies enthusiastically, “A winning streak isn’t something a lot of the students here have experienced. You’re off to a great start this year. You’re bound to be nominated for Homecoming Court!”

Brittany almost laughs at that.

She’s been nominated at her old school before – even won a couple times – but that’s because she was voted for by her peers, peers who have known her for years. She doesn’t expect any nomination this year, the only reason anyone knows her is because she plays football. If she were to be nominated, it wouldn’t be because she’s well-liked or something like that. It would be because she sticks out like a sore thumb.

“Sounds cool,” Brittany replies despite disagreeing with him.

“So tell us,” JBI’s voice takes a dip. It’s sneaky, almost mischievous, “Would you rather be crowned the King or the Queen?”

Brittany’s stomach flips. She doesn’t like this interview thing anymore.

“What?” She asks because the question confuses her but she finds him wearing this sly grin like he’s just found her weak spot.

He hasn’t, but Brittany’s guard instantly goes up.

“Don’t be shy,” He coaxes with the wag of his brow, “You know what I’m talking about. You’re a female QB, no way you’re strai – “

“Hey!” Suddenly Santana’s there, of all people, and there’s fury in her eyes as she shoves JBI’s mic to his chest, “Fuck off.”

Brittany blinks like she’s caught in a daydream. Her eyes shift from Santana to JBI whose grin widens upon seeing the Co-Captain.

“Now this is a pairing I’m sure everyone would love to see,” He says as he talks into the mic again like nothing’s happened, like Santana isn’t about to beat him over the head with it. He looks to the camera – the kid’s been lingering over Brittany’s right shoulder thus far – and says, “It’s the infamous Santana Lopez, gracing us with her presence.”

Santana rolls her eyes, “I’m not gracing you with shit. Your little show sucks.”

“That’s not what my viewer count says. I’m sure you remember,” JBI quips as he turns back to the pair, “So Brittany, you didn’t answer the question.”

Brittany feels like a deer caught in the headlights; she can’t even remember what the question was, but thankfully Santana interrupts again.

“I said beat it, loser, before I shove that camera so far up your dumb ass you’ll be spitting out polaroids,” Santana snaps.

To Brittany’s surprise though, JBI doesn’t move right away.

“That doesn’t make sense, we’re not even using that kind of cam – “

Santana grits her jaw and takes a threatening step forward. Her voice dips low and gravely, “Try me, Jewfro. Please. I’ve been itching to kick you square in the nuts.”

That threat has JBI reaching to protect his crotch before he turns and runs down the hall with his camera-friend following him.  

Brittany watches Santana smirk like she’s so proud of herself for being able to instill the fear of God in someone before she’s averting her gaze. When her stormy brown eyes land on Brittany, the blonde feels a cold chill.

The smirk’s gone and in it’s place is a familiar scowl. Brick by brick, her wall goes up.

“I know you’re new here, Pierce, so a little word of advice,” Santana warns as she turns to the lockers, “Don’t talk to him. He’s a wannabe journalist that reports nothing but bullshit. He’ll twist your words if you let him, trust me. I’ve seen it happen many times and I don’t want you to get caught up in his shit.”

Brittany’s at a loss for words.

Santana hasn’t spoken to her all this time and now all of sudden this? Why would it matter to Santana what she did or said or who she spoke to? Why would she care, she doesn’t even know Brittany?

There’s so many questions beginning to swarm her, but none make it out of her head.

“Thanks,” Is the only word Brittany ends up saying around a shy grin.

There’s a hint of smile on Santana’s lips when their eyes catch for a quick second, but it disappears just as fast.

“It’s whatever,” She says and Brittany hears a locker door slam, “I’ll see you in class.”

It isn’t until Santana’s halfway down the hall that Brittany finally realizes that their lockers are right next to each other’s. She can do nothing but laugh at the small coincidence.

\\

The second time Santana speaks to her, it’s because Brittany accidentally scared the crap out of her.

It’s Thursday now – the last day of practice before the Week 3 game – so Brittany wants to get a jump on warm-ups. She knows there’s a thirty minute buffer between Cheerios and Titans practice, but she has to account for the extra time it takes to pick up her gear from Coach Beiste’s office first since everything’s stored in the boys’ locker room.

Usually, she gets the whole room to herself and plays a little music from her phone to get amped up. This time though, there’s one Cheerio that’s already there and this particular Cheerio surprisingly has a beautiful singing voice.

Brittany feels like she’s being lured in by one of those sirens she has read about in Greek mythology. She thinks she should probably make her presence known because creeping around a locker room is kind of weird, but she’s so in awe of the girl’s voice.

More importantly, the owner of that voice.

“Jesus!” Santana gasps when she rounds the corner to find Brittany lingering by the hampers. Her hand flies to chest to steady her beating heart, “What the hell are you doing, Pierce? Trying to give a girl a heart attack?”

Brittany thanks the heavens when she finds that Santana’s fully clothed already.

“I’m sorry!” Brittany blushes, “I didn’t think anyone would be here.”

Santana just shakes her head before eyeing Brittany again. There’s a flash of concern when Santana says, “You look like shit, worse than yesterday when I saw you with JBI.”

Brittany’s not sure how to take that. She hasn’t been sleeping well, that’s for sure, but it worries her that her tiredness is beginning to show. At least, that’s what she hopes Santana is talking about.

“I’ve been super busy lately. Guess I’m just ready for the weekend,” She says instead as she fumbles with the shoulder pads in her hands, “Sorry for interrupting you.”

“Interrupting me?”

“Yeah, you were singing. It sounded really pretty.”

“It’s not a big deal,” Santana brushes off before crossing her arms over her chest, “Why are you in here so early? Doesn’t your practice start at 4?”

“Why are you in here so late?” Brittany challenges, “Didn’t your practice start at 3:30?”

Santana cocks her head to the side, “I had to talk to Ms. Pillsbury about something.”

“Who?”

“She’s the guidance counselor. You’ll probably meet her soon, she’s on all the Seniors about their college application due dates. Figures, she’d want to start off with me.”

Brittany wants to know more. Afterall, she’s naturally curious when it comes to getting to know new people so the questions build but she doesn’t voice any of them. Not that Santana would give her any answers anyway.

Santana’s looking at all the gear Brittany’s toting along with her duffle bag and her brows furrow, “Did you carry all of that here?”

Brittany looks down at her gear and nods.

“Why?” Santana scrunches her nose, “Don’t you have a locker or something?”

Brittany shakes her head, “I was never given one. Coach Beiste said Coach Sylvester is meant to assign one to me, but I guess she’s been busy.”

“Doubt it. She hates Coach Beiste so in turn, she hates you.”

Brittany frowns; what’d she do?

“She’s probably just giving you a hard time because you’re a Titan instead of a Cheerio,” Santana answers then walks off. She goes to grab the clipboard that hangs above the hampers, dangling from it is a key, “I can assign you one, it’s part of my Co-Captain privileges. This side is reserved for the squad, obviously, but the set by the showers are all free. You can leave your football stuff there too, doubt anyone in here is going to want to steal it.”

Brittany’s taken aback by Santana’s random act of kindness for a second time that week. She let’s her smile shine, “Thanks. It really helps having everyting in one place. I don’t have to waste so much time walking back and forth.”

Santana nods and there’s that hint of a smile again before she’s leading the way over to the section of lockers that’s now become Brittany’s.

“Top or bottom?” Santana asks as she scans the list attached to the clipboard. Brittany smirks and notices the moment Santana realizes what she has said, “As in locker preference.”

“Duh,” Brittany jokes with a straight face, “What else would you mean?”

Santana’s face is flushed now and Brittany tries her hardest not to laugh. She’s kind of cute when she’s flustered like that.

“I’ll put you down for top,” Santana answers stiffly. Now her eyes are solely glued to the clipboard in her hands, “I guess I can unlock the bottom one too though so you can have the entire segment. You can – uh – decide which you want to use or whatever.”

“That works for me,” Brittany replies casually before she starts to undress.

Santana practically runs into a wall when she sees Brittany pull her top up over her head and let it drop onto her open duffle bag.

“I’ll just leave you to it then,” Santana calls over her shoulder as she scurries off.

Brittany watches the whole thing curiously. Has Santana never changed in front of other girls before or something? That’s the only explanation she comes to for how awkward she’s being.

Brittany doesn’t dwell on it, just continues getting dressed.

\\

By the time Brittany’s got her practice gear on, Santana appears again. She looks a little shier than before and she’s fiddling with her hands.

Brittany just smiles and reaches down for her helmet, “You going now?”

“Yeah,” Santana answers, “Just trying to enjoy the last bit of A.C.”

“It’s not that hot out,” Brittany chuckles and motions to her pads, “At least you don’t have to wear all this.”

“True,” Santana smirks, “Now that would suck.”

Brittany chuckles again. She likes this version of Santana, she hopes she can see her more often but there’s still a giant pink elephant in the room so Brittany doesn’t get too excited.

“I’ll see you out there I guess,” Brittany says.

Santana nods and turns to leave, but then stops and turns back to face Brittany again.

“Actually, I just wanted to say,” Santana starts.

Brittany wonders if this is it. If she’s finally going to get an apology after what Santana said to her the other week, or at least the start of a conversation about her opinion? Anything would suffice by this point.

Brittany waits.

“I just wanted to say,” Santana repeats and her voice is so shaky. It’s completely unlike the confidence she possessed when she told off JBI, “Have a good practice.”

It’s not what Brittany was anticipating her to say – and judging by the uncertainty on Santana’s face, it wasn’t what she was anticipating to say either – but she’ll take it.

“Thanks,” Brittany grins as she walks by her to leave, “You too.”

\\

By Friday night, Brittany’s feeling better than she has all week. Although they’ve yet to acknowledge Santana’s misjudgments, baby steps in the right direction have been taken.

Kind of.

First Santana defended her against JBI then on Thursday she assigned Brittany a locker and today? Today Santana brought her a drink from the Cheerios special lounge while Brittany was getting ready for the game.

“What is it?” Brittany asked hesitantly as she eyed the color of it. She’s sitting on the benches in the locker room completely dressed now in her uniform. All that’s left are the final touches like a quick dance party to get her pumped and applying a little Game Day eye make up.

“It’s a bunch of healthy stuff like fruits and veggies. All fresh so that explains the color, no preservatives. There’s some vitamin supplements in there too,” Santana explains like it’s all a bother.

Brittany’s beginning to see through that though.

“I don’t take drugs,” Brittany replies and tries to give the bottle back.

Santana rolls her eyes and there’s that hint of a smile again, “Does Vitamin D count as a drug? If so, then Puckerman is definitely on something stronger.”

Brittany frowns at the accusation, “Wait, seriously? The team can get in a lot of troub – “

“Easy, Pierce, I’m sure he’s just all-talk,” Santana amends, “I wouldn’t open an investigation on him or anything.” Then there’s a pause and for a second she looks a little shy as she motions to the bottle in Brittany’s hands. Her voice comes out softer, “Drink that. It’ll help with the tiredness and it’s good for your immune system too incase you’re about to come down with something.”

“You think I’m getting sick?” Brittany chuckles and turns back to apply thick black stripes to the apples of her cheeks.

Santana lifts a shoulder casually before standing, “You almost fell asleep in class today.”

Brittany blushes. Did she really? She’s so tired, she can’t even remember.

“What does that have to do with getting sick?” Brittany wonders.

“It’s almost that time of the year and bugs move quick,” Santana explains, “A lot quicker if you’re not taking care of yourself…for example, not getting enough sleep.”

That takes Brittany by surprise. Santana caring about her? Why? But despite the surprise, Brittany feels warm and fuzzy all over.

“Alright Doc, I’ll drink it,” Brittany jokes as she finishes up drawing on the left stripe. She turns to Santana as she twists off the lid and makes a show of taking a long drink.

Santana actually laughs this time before she shakes her head.

“I feel better already,” Brittany beams as she stands. They’re close now and it’s then that Brittany really notices the height difference, “Thanks for this. What do I owe you? Pressed juices like these probably cost an arm and a leg here.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Santana dismisses and takes a step back to put some distance between them, “Just bring home another win.”

“You got it,” Brittany winks and goes to take another swig while she watches Santana leave the locker room.

\\

Unfortunately, it’s a rocky start this time for the Titans. It’s not that Brittany isn’t playing at her best because she always brings 110% to the field no matter how she’s feeling. It’s actually her teammates who aren’t as focused as she is for some reason. There’s still a lot of work to be done when it comes to being a cohesive unit, but today they’ve really taken a step back.

They’re down by 17 points when the half is called.

\\

“Alright, what’s going on out there?” Coach Beiste questions. She’s fuming as she eyes everyone for an answer, “What I’m seeing is that Pierce is the only one here that’s come to play.”

Karofsky scoffs and folds up his arms, “I’m so over hearing about her!”

“Me too!” Azimio chimes in, “First we let in Hummel and now her? What’s next? She gonna join the Puck Heads in the off season and change the game for them too? The rest of us are chopped liver now. It’s not good for my reputation!”

“Your reputation? You were a loser just like the rest of us before Brittany came,” Mike replies but the two don’t take kindly to being called a loser and start shoving at him.

“Cut it out!” Sam tries to breaking it up.

Brittany looks over at them and grimaces. Dave and Azimio both have been a pain in her ass since she’s joined the team, but she thought they were past this by now? They’ve got a winning record, they’re actually improving on being a better team, so what’s the issue all of a sudden?

Coach Beiste shakes her head at them, “Give me a break! One person doesn’t win games. You don’t have to like Pierce but you’re going to give her your respect if you want to play on my field. It’s as simple as that. You work together, you listen and respect each other. That’s what it means to be a team, is it not?”

Brittany eyes her teammates. Aside from the select handful that actually like her, the guys look at her like she’s the enemy. It makes Brittany feel really unsettled.

“Is it not?” Coach Beiste presses.

There are mumbles amongst the squad but it’s not enough for Coach Beiste.

“Louder!”

“Yes, Coach!” They say in unison.

“Okay then, let’s starting acting like a team out there and win this game!” She says with the clap of her hands.

\\

They’re in the fourth quarter now and the Titans have managed to make it a close game despite their rough start. Coach Beiste’s pep talk must’ve worked because the team is playing harder than the first half, but Brittany still senses the undertones of resentment.

She packs it away for now and just focuses on making plays. Afterall, she’s meant to be winning this one for Santana. Well not for Santana; it’s more like paying her back for the drink earlier.

Brittany nods resolutely and looks to the sidelines to see the Co-Captain shaking her pompoms. She does a high kick and yells out a cheer in time with the others, but the smile she’s wearing is what catches Brittany’s eye.

She shakes her head and focuses on the snap.

“Down!” Brittany calls out. She catches the other team’s Line Backer’s movement from the corner of her eye. The defense looks hungry, but so are they. She smirks and braces herself, “Hut!”

The ball is snapped and Brittany quickly hands it off to Puckerman. So far their run game has been pretty weak tonight, but Puckerman surprises everyone and kicks into gear. He plows through the defense at full speed, breaking tackle after tackle, until he crosses over for a first down and steps out of bounds.

He spikes down the ball and makes a sawing motion with his arm while the crowd goes wild. Matt runs up to congratulate him with a hard pat on the back.

“Yes!” Brittany jumps up and down as she cheers.

Over on the sidelines, the Cheerios are just as excited as they chant:

“First and ten, first and ten! First and ten, let’s do it again!”

Brittany sees Santana watching her with a huge grin and it makes her feel warm all over again. She knows it’s silly to think that Santana’s cheers are just for her – same goes for that smile – but she can’t help but dream.  

Yeah, she’s decided. She’s really going to win this game just for her.

Brittany quickly runs up to their new line of scrimmage and everyone starts to take their position. She smacks Puckerman on the back when he jogs up next to her to get in formation.

“Nice carry, Puckerman!” She compliments.

“Sawed right through them!” Puckerman shouted excitedly back.

“Let’s keep up that energy,” Brittany praised and called out another play. They were in field goal range now, but like always – Brittany wasn’t here to play it safe especially with the new set of downs.

This time she wanted to try another play-action route since it worked pretty well in the pre-season game. Mike and Sam have proved to her that they have great hands, but they needed to work on their speed and timing. Now was a perfect time to test that. With Puckerman on a roll, the defense was sure to up their coverage on him rather than the receivers which would work perfectly in Brittany’s favor.

“Blue 82!” Brittany repeats and looks to her sides for confirmation that they’ve picked up the slight change.

Mike and Sam give her the barest nod before they’re glaring at their defenders. Brittany kicks up her foot and Mike quickly changes position so that he’s next to Sam now on the right side of the field.

“Blue 82!” Brittany calls out again and readies herself for the snap, “Down…Hut!”

The ball is hiked and she fakes the hand off to Puckerman so smoothly that the defense follows after him just as planned. While they chase him down to the left side of the field, Mike and Same cut up the right. Brittany holds onto the ball longer than she likes, making sure she gives her receivers enough time to breakaway from their defenders.

The other team’s Line Backer is trying his hardest to break through her O-Line though. Thankfully, Matt ends up making a key block for Mike and Brittany’s able to step up in the pocket and fire down a quick pass. It’s a little lower than Brittany wanted, but Mike makes the catch and pushes past a defender for another first down!  

Everyone went wild, but the play clock was still going since Mike hadn’t made it out of bounds.

Brittany motioned for everyone to hurry into position – this time she was going for a slant route with Matt being the intended receiver. She kept her eye on the seconds ticking away, but the team was able to make it in time to get set.

“OG 30!” She called out. She was really starting to feel that adrenaline kick in but she kept her cool and held out her hands, “Down…Hut!”

Again, Brittany caught the ball and dropped back as everyone began to move. Despite the grumpiness during half time, the guys that made up her O-Line – mostly Dave and Azimio – did their jobs correctly and held the line. Brittany looked to her right and faked a throw before turning to her left and firing at Matt.

He juggled the ball in the air, but ultimately was able to secure possession of it and ran up the side of the field for an easy touchdown!

“Let’s go!” Brittany pumped her fist in the air. That was their best drive all game and now with the new points on the board, they’re finally up by 6! With just a little over ten minutes left in the final quarter, Brittany’s feeling good about their odds in coming away with another win.

\\

She was right to feel confident; Titans end up winning the game 27 – 21. When the final whistle was blown, everyone was cheering and some of her teammates rushed to congratulate her efforts. She happily returned the sentiments, but she couldn’t help but glance over at the sidelines to see if Santana was watching her again too.

And she was, alongside Quinn and the rest of the Cheerios.

Brittany just grinned as she pulled off her helmet and let down her hair, happy that she was able to make good on her promise to Santana.

\\

Despite how great she felt after Friday’s win, Monday morning was a different story.

Everything hurts and she was so exhausted that she didn’t even go for her usual morning run which is telling because she’s one of those rare people that actually works well with routine exercising. She guesses all those late nights studying combined with her patchy sleep schedule have finally taken its toll on her body.

She thinks back to what Santana said Friday about getting enough rest. God, she hopes she isn’t coming down with anything. Getting sick is just not what she needs right now.

“Hey mom?” Brittany taps on Whitney’s bedroom door. The curtains are already drawn and welcome in the morning sun so she knows her mom’s awake already. Whitney appears in the doorway of the master bath in her work uniform and instantly looks worried.

“You feeling okay, kiddo?” She asks as she crosses the room to press at Brittany’s forehead.

“I don’t think I’m sick, but I feel horrible,” Brittany explains.

“Yeah, you don’t have a fever. Have you been getting enough sleep?” Whitney asks.

Brittany shakes her head. Whitney eyes her with concern.

“It’s not the dreams again, is it?”

Brittany shakes her head again, “No. I haven’t had one since the last time I told you. I think I’m just worn out.”

“You’re a busy girl,” Whitney nods.

“Is it okay if I stay home today?” Brittany asks hesitantly, “It’s the only day of the week that I don’t really need to be at practice. I think I can access most of my schoolwork online so – “

“It’s okay, Britt. Just rest today,” Whitney says, “Missing a day isn’t going to break you and I know you’ll catch up when you’re feeling better.”

Brittany fills with relief and gives her mom a weak smile. She’s so happy that Whitney’s so understanding, but she guesses that’s come from experience with everything that happened at the beginning of the year with her dad’s passing. Many mental health days were taken, but Whitney never made her feel bad for it. If anything, she always encouraged them.

“Thanks mom,” Brittany says before taking herself back to bed. She’s able to fall asleep fast for once and she doesn’t wake again until she has to use the bathroom.

\\

When she wakes up the third time, it’s just after three. She sees a text from her mom saying that Gran has Pete and she’ll pick him up once she gets off of work so that Brittany can continue resting.

She smiles and sends a text back to thank her before getting up. After a quick snack and a big glass of OJ, Brittany heads to the couch for another nap.

This time, sleep doesn’t find her as easily as it did the other times so she turns on the tv and tries to find something to watch. She decides to put on something she considers boring in hopes that maybe it’ll bore her right to sleep.

Miraculously, her plan works and she settles in for another nap.

An hour or so goes by when Brittany begins to stir because Pete’s trying to squeeze onto the couch next to her. His cold feel touch her bare ankles beneath her blanket and she flinches at the feel.

“Honey, what did I say in the car?” Whitney whispers, “Let your sister rest.”

“I am,” Pete pouts, “I just wanted to sit with her.”

“How about you come help me with – “

“It’s okay, mom,” Brittany pushes to sit up. Pete instantly beams at her, “I’ve slept enough I think.”

“Feeling better?” Whitney asks and brushes her hand over Brittany’s wild hair.

She nods and does a little stretch, “Much better.”

“Good to hear,” Whitney says and bends down to press kisses to Brittany and Pete’s head, “I’m going to make dinner then. Just leftovers so it shouldn’t take long.”

When she heads off for the kitchen, Pete snuggles in closer to Brittany.

“Did you get to watch cartoons all day?” He asks curiously.

Brittany shakes her head, “Nope, but I did take many naps.”

“Nice!”

“Totally.”

\\

Brittany and Pete are watching tv together a moment later when Brittany hears a knock at the front door. Pete jumps up at the sound and rushes to see who it is.

“Don’t open that door, Peter!” Whitney calls out from the kitchen, “Let your sister get it.”

Pete pouts and hangs back as Brittany moves to get up. She chuckles and ruffles up his hair as she passes by. When Brittany takes a peek, she’s shocked by what she sees and quickly opens the door.

“Santana?” Brittany greets. She’s both confused and pleasantly surprised.

“Who are you?” Pete asks curiously with his head tilted up at the Co-Captain.

“Hi,” Santana smiles kind of nervously as she glances between the two. She’s dressed in her Cheerios warm-up gear – she must’ve just finished practice – and has her binder tucked under her arm.

“Uh…I’m Santana,” She answers softly, “And you are?”

“I’m Peter!” Brittany’s brother holds out his hand to shake, “Everyone calls me Pete though, so you can too if you want.”

Santana quirks a brow at him but smiles as she shakes his hand anyway, “Nice to meet you, Pete.”

“Pete, can you go help mom?” Brittany instructs. She waits until he’s run off then asks Santana out of disbelief, “What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t in class today,” She says.

“Yeah…I didn’t feel well.”

“Didn’t I say you were going to get sick?” Santana smirks.

“I’m not sick,” Brittany sighs, “I was just tired.”

“Right,” Santana keeps the smirk and motions to her binder, “Well, I brought you the work you missed. It’s kind of important for the paper due in a few weeks.”

Brittany just blinks. Maybe she’s still asleep and this is all a dream?

“Here,” Santana offers and goes to flip through her binder for a couple handouts to give to Brittany.

The blonde accepts them although she’s still trying to grasp the fact that Santana’s standing on her doorstep, “Thanks.”

“Sure,” Santana nods and it looks like she’s about to turn away.

“Wait. How’d you know where I lived?” Brittany quickly asks before she can run off.

“Mike told me,” Santana shrugs, “Actually, Mike told Quinn and Quinn told me. Apparently you two are neighbors?”

“Yeah, he likes to tell everyone that,” Brittany chuckles before she gets a sudden burst of confidence and asks, “Did you…want to come in?”

“Uhhh,” Santana looks unsure but then she gives Brittany a small smile, “Okay.”

Brittany opens the door a little wider and leads Santana into the living room. She pushes the blanket she brought down from her room to the side so they can both sit on the couch. Brittany starts to flip through the packet Santana gave her and she’s already dreading the assignment.

“Woah,” Brittany gasps, “This is a lot.”

“Yeah,” Santana nods, “I can help you with it though if you want? Miss Holliday said we can work in groups if we wanted, but we’ll be graded individually.”

Brittany blinks blankly again, “Huh, that’s funny.”

“What?”

Brittany just shakes her head and shrugs, “Just the other week you were insulting me then you stopped talking to me for awhile and now you’re being super helpful. I just can’t get a read on you.”

Brittany wasn’t trying to make Santana feel cornered, she just wanted to open up the conversation. She was over ignoring the obvious, so she went straight for the kill and brought it up head on.

Santana’s shoulders dropped, “Look, I’m…I’m really sorry about that. I was so out of line.”

“Yeah, you really were,” Brittany replies but she isn’t trying to rile Santana up by being argumentative, “You know how many times I’ve heard something similar over the years? Ever since I started playing sports it’s always been: you run like a girl, you throw like a girl, you’re pretty good…for a girl.”

Santana looks apologetically at Brittany and goes to fiddle with her hands in her lap. Brittany notes the familiar motion and decides its something she does when she’s nervous.

Brittany adds, “Like being a girl that plays sports is somehow less than, like it’s a bad thing. I’ve never understood it. I’m just as good as they are.”

Santana shakes her head, “No. I’ve seen you play. You’re so much better.”

“Thanks,” Brittany chuckles weakly, “You know, when I first started I wasn't trying to make some big statement. I didn't want the pressure of being the first female whatever, I just wanted to play. And my family, they've always been super supportive no matter the sport, especially my dad.”

Brittany feels the lump in her throat slowly start to form at his mention and takes a deep breath before speaking again.

“He use to come to every game. But people are so stuck on how I've disrupted their precious norms and it makes things harder than they need to be. No matter where I go, the people will either love me or hate me for this. It's crazy. I'm just a girl who loves playing football, why's that so odd?”

“It’s not,” Santana reasons, “You’re a good different, a kind of different a place like this needs.”

Brittany smiles fondly at Santana’s kind words, “Then why did you say what you did?”

Santana pauses for awhile trying to find the right words but in the end she just shakes her head and sighs, “Probably because I’m a bitch?”

Brittany flinches, she doesn’t think that’s the case.

“You’re just…you’re not what I imagined. I thought football players were rough and you’re not like that at all. You’re soft, delicate. You treat with kindness.”

“So does Kurt,” Brittany offers kindly, “And Mike, Sam too.”

“You know what I mean,” Santana replies.

“Yeah, I do. It’s called a stereotype,” Brittany smirks, “Football players happen to come in all shapes and sizes though. Some are soft and delicate like you say I am and some aren’t, but out on the field we’re all the same. We’re one team.”

Santana nods, “I’m sorry about what I said. You have every right to be on that field, same as the guys. I’m sorry if I made you feel otherwise. I guess I’m still trying to adjust too. It’s not really something you see here…”

“I accept your apology,” Brittany grins.

Santana lets out a deep sigh, “This town can be so old school sometimes and it sucks how there are younger generations out here that don’t know any different. They don’t see how wrong it is to have such a shit mentality. I guess I forgot what progression looks like until you came.”

Brittany knows Santana’s being genuine now and it makes the wait for this conversation worth it. She goes to joke, “Well it’s a learning process. Now you know for the next time you come across someone who doesn’t fit the status quo.”

“Yeah,” Santana matches Brittany’s grin, “I really do.”

“Well hello,” Whitney greets as she enters the living room. She glances between Brittany and Santana as Santana rises to her feet. She stands up straight and proper, “You going to introduce me to your friend, Britt?”

Brittany gulps at the label. She doesn’t know if she’d call Santana a friend just yet.

“This is my mom Whitney. Mom, this is Santana,” Brittany says while Santana gives a polite smile, “We have class together. She was just bringing me some work I missed today.”

“That’s so kind of you,” Whitney compliments Santana.

“It was nothing,” Santana replied and glanced to Brittany, “I tried to warn her about the risks of over-doing it. I can’t imagine having a schedule like hers.”

Brittany’s brow rises at the overly polite tone. Who knew Santana was a little suck up when it came to parents. She smirks as she watches it unfold.

“Stubbornness, she gets that from her dad’s side,” Whitney jokes, “Would you like to stay for dinner? We’re just having leftovers but there’s plenty to go around.”

“Lasagna!” Pete cheers as he runs in from the kitchen.

Santana chuckles but shakes her head, “Thank you, but I should probably get home before my mom starts to worry.”

Whitney nods, “Of course. Well, it was lovely meeting you. Come on Petey, let’s make our plates.”

When they both wander off, Brittany’s again standing alone with Santana in the living room.

“So you’re a kiss-ass,” Brittany jokes, “Never would’ve guessed it.”

Santana rolls her eyes despite smiling, “I have a thing with parents. They love me, okay?”

“Sure, sure,” Brittany giggles, “Don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone that you’re secretly kind. Wouldn’t want to ruin your rep.”

“I appreciate it,” Santana quips playfully before gathering her things, “Well, I really should head off before my mom starts blowing up my phone.”

“Cool,” Brittany nods and leads the way over to the front door to walk Santana out, “Well. Thanks again for bringing over the work I missed.”

“No biggie,” Santana waved off as she turned to leave, “Glad you’re feeling better. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Brittany waved and watched Santana make her way over to her little red Mazda with a pleased smile.

Maybe they weren’t exactly friends yet, but compared to the downward spiral they’ve been experiencing…they weren’t enemies either.

And in football terms, that’s called forward progress.

[nikibogwater]

2020 Creator’s Self-love Extravaganza

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 8 favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I’ve been tagged for this a couple of times in the last few weeks, but haven’t had time/brainpower to work on it until now (but I love you all, and thank you for the tags!!!!)

This is probably going to be filled with nothing but my Tales of Arcadia stuff, as that was where I think my creativity really peaked during 2020. I’ll try to split the list evenly between fanart pieces and fanfics, but honestly, I’m most happy with the fics I published in 2020, especially the 6 parts of the still-ongoing Immortal Bonds series.

8. This doodle of Douxie, Archie, and Nari

One of the only scribbles I did in the month of August that I do not now cringe at whenever I look back at it, haha. It’s pretty rough, I’ll admit, but I really like the feeling it conveys--that this small found family is looking towards an uncertain future together. 

7. “You will not touch him!”

This was an experimental sketch in a few ways. It was the first really “thematically intense” doodle I ever tried, featuring an injured Douxie and his absolutely furious Bean Sister. But it was also a fun experiment with hybrid art. After finishing the traditional sketch and scanning it into my computer, I played around a bit with touching it up digitally. All the green in the picture was added in digitally. The actual physical sketch in my book is completely colorless. I later decided that I preferred sticking to exclusively traditional methods, but it was fun to play around with something different for a bit. 

6. These Douxie & Archie sketches

The first (and so far, only) piece of art I ever did that broke 100 notes. Apparently, people really love Soft Kitty Snuggles, haha. But I do genuinely love how these two side-by-side doodles show the relationship between Archie and Douxie--how it’s evolved, and how it’s stayed the same.

5. Glitter Wings Nari

Drawing Nari with her glitter wings for the first time was one of the best creative experiences of my year. Up until that point, I’d been putting a lot of pressure on myself to make stuff that looked “good,” and that meant all of my doodles were colorless because...well, I can’t color things “professionally.” But it hit me one day that “Hey. My art is stagnating, and it’s not very fun anymore.” So I ditched all my aspirations of making something “objectively good” and went nuts just making something I loved. I do colored pieces all the time now, and I love them, even though nobody would ever describe them as “professional.”

4. A Moment to Breathe

Moving on to fics now (which is really my area of expertise), A Moment to Breathe is just a wonderfully soft moment of relationship-building between Douxie and Nari. I felt that Nari’s dialogue here was especially good, capturing that dichotomy of ancient wisdom and childlike trust that makes her character so appealing to me. Also a good example of Niki just going absolutely nuts with headcanons regarding magic and the physical sensations that accompany it.

3. Feline Paralysis

This piece was inspired by a prompt from my very, very dear friend @poetryinmotion-author, and was extra special to me because I was able to pull a lot from my own life experiences. Writing from Archie’s perspective for most of the fic was incredibly fun, and I particularly love his stand-off with Merlin in the latter half of the fic. 

2. The City Never Sleeps

My first ever ToA fic, and the one that really launched my fandom career here. It was sort of a therapy-fic for myself, a way of dealing with the intense emotions left by the ending of Wizards. It basically just poured out of me in a rush of passion, and somehow, remarkably, is still one of the best pieces I’ve ever done. It’s also, as far as I can tell, the first post-canon Wizards fic published Ao3, so I guess that’s something, haha. 

1. A Shot in the Dark

My followers are probably getting tired of hearing me harp on about this one, but A Shot in the Dark was by far the greatest project of my 2020. Unlike my other fics, which were mostly slice-of-life stories about the characters dealing with personal problems and relationships, this was a higher-stakes plot with a slow-burn buildup of dread and apprehension. I was able to push that sweet sweet Hurt/Comfort to the absolute max with this one, and I am so, so proud of how it turned out. It may have underperformed in terms of Kudos/Hits, but I still consider it to be my current Magnum Opus, and definitely one of the highest points of my 2020 as a whole.

I am quite late in getting to this post, so I think most of my fellow creator friends have already been tagged by now. But here’s a couple No Pressure tags: @a-s-levynn and @sergeantsporks. Anyone else who sees this is welcome to jump on board, and make sure you @ me if you do. ✨

[okaywowcool]

Hey all! This is something I’ve wanted to start for a while, and since folks have been curious about my favorite shops, I thought now was as good a time as any to start doing monthly favorite articles for you all! These will mainly discuss individual pieces that I’ve bought and am wearing, shops I’ve discovered that month or that I’m particularly interested in at the time, my favorite silhouettes and colors/patterns that are currently trending, and any skincare or makeup that I’m particularly into that month as well! Let’s get it going with this past month, June!

CURRENT FAVE PERSONAL PIECES

Tomboyx Essentials Soft Bra, in Next Gen Heather Grey with Rainbow Trim, $32

I’m almost always wearing my Tomboyx soft bra with the rainbow trim. It’s comfortable as hell which has been getting me through some pretty rough chronic pain lately, and it’s also cute with the rainbow trim which is a big bonus. I’m a 22/24 and I wear a size 2XL in their soft bras and it’s absolutely my favorite bralette for comfort that I’ve tried.

Fun with Fab on Top Easy Fit Dress in Doodle, now on sale for $49.99

My fave dress that I have right now is this piece from Modcloth, it has a really nice loose fit, pockets, and the little tie neck detail is really sweet but still cut high enough to be appropriate for work. It also is just such a fun print that it quickly surged to favorite status with me. However...Modcloth’s quality has dramatically decreased lately, and I definitely do regret buying this piece full price. It’s already fraying at the hem and isn’t from me not treating it delicately, it had started fraying when I first took it out of the bag, which is just unfortunate. Definitely make sure if you’re picking something up from there lately you’re getting it on sale! I expected much higher quality for a dress that was over $60.

Other than those two pieces, I’m obsessed with quite a few of my own Trash Queen pieces that I can’t actually share with you guys here yet, because they’re prototypes for my upcoming collection and a secret. You can become a patron to learn a lot more about those on my patreon!

FAVE NEW SHOPS

Lil Rainbow Platform Sandals, $19

I’ve been routinely checking Rocket Dog for their sales lately, they have so many super cute sandals for sale right now and I’m hoping to pick up a few for the summer, namely the Lil Rainbow Platform Sandals (above) and the Lazerbeam Space Patch Platform Sandals.

Mini Scooter Suedehead Mod Dress, $111 with custom sizing available

I also recently discovered a new Etsy shop through instagram that I would love to order from, called Swinging Chicks! Swinging Chicks specializes in retro and 60s mod inspired clothing and offers custom sizing to include all sorts of bodies, for no extra charge. I would love to save up and eventually get one of their pinafore dresses, like the one pictured above or this tartan pinafore, or one of their adorable blouses.

Two Headed Snake Embroidery, $68.62

I’m also very much on the lookout for cute and unique decorations for my house lately, and have had my eye on the beautiful embroidery work from The Skellyton’s Closet, which are absolutely gorgeous and would make for such a cute goth touch in a gallery wall.

FAVE JUNE SILHOUETTES

Bib Overall Dress, $34.99

Not all of these are June-exclusive, but this month I’m still obsessing over overall skirts in all possible prints and forms, ever since getting a first one for myself I’ve been wanting to pick up more.

Lace up Sides Top and Midi Skirt Set, $55

I’m also loving midi length bodycon dresses, especially for layering with slouchy crop tops or in cute 90s-inspired fabrications like tie dye or crushed velvet.

Leopard Print Slip Dress, $35

I’m also very into satin/silk slip dresses with lingerie details over t-shirts right now.

Check out any of these trends in more detail on my blog now by clicking the links below!

Overalls | Midi Length | Slips | Tees

PRINTS & COLORS

Sequin Raincoat from Topshop, $110 // Holographic Boots from Current Mood, $88 // Rainbow Pleated Midi Skirt from Modcloth, $65

With festival season in full swing, sequins, rainbows, holographic fabrics, and funky psychedelic prints are available everywhere, which is what I’ve got my eye on most now.

Check out more of these trends on my blog by clicking one of the links below!

Iridescent | Holographic | Rainbow

Floral Cardigan from F21, $38 // Plaid Crop Top from Dollskill, $25 // Tube Top + Joggers Set from F21, $35

In terms of general colors, I’m really into these slightly dusty feeling reddish corals that I’ve been seeing a lot of lately, I think they pair really well with all skin tones and look so good with denim and light neutrals.

MAKEUP/SKINCARE

Niacinamide 10% + Zinc 1%, $5.90

This little magic in a bottle has pretty much entirely eliminated breakouts for me, even with the sweatiness of summer. I use a few drops in the morning and evening whenever I can remember, and put it on my T-zone and on the parts of my face where my glasses hit or that I have a tendency to touch the most often. to keep things under control and it does a wonderful job.

Iceland Hydrating Eye Stick, $8.99 (at CVS)

My hours at work have gotten longer and I’m pretty routinely bad at going to bed on time, so this has become one of my secret weapons for morning puffiness, dark under eye circles, and also, surprisingly, migraines and headaches! It’s naturally cooling after having been in my purse in my hot car and the melon smell is great and feels fresh. It’s hydrating while still being light, and just kind of gives a nice all over cooling effect, plus the packaging is adorable which helps me remember to actually use it.

Mango Hand Butter, $7.33 (at Walmart)

Another big winner just for how cute the packaging is, but this little bottle of hand lotion is also powerful! I have to deal with extremely dry patches of skin from PCOS, but it’s helped clear that up massively just with a few days of repeated use, which is rare for something like this. It’s really strong without having a medical smell or the really heavy moisturizer feel, which can be distracting.

Maybelline’s Brow Precise Fiber Volumizer, $4.29 (at Ulta)

While I’m routinely lusting after Glossier’s Boy Brow and now Milk Makeup’s new Kush Brow Gel, sometimes you just gotta pick up a drugstore version to just get the job done and this cheap option has always done the trick for me. I have dark brown, almost black hair, and use it in the color “Deep Brown” and it’s become one of the few things I put on even if I don’t have time to put any other makeup on, because if my skin and brows are on point I’m typically feeling good about myself.

So that’s it, gang! I hope you guys enjoyed this, please let me know if you have any feedback or specific things you might like to see for next month, I hope this was hopeful or interesting and I’m planning to do another in July!

[lyssala]

Stars

Pairings: Terra/Aqua, Slightly Implied Cloud/Tifa, Kingdom Hearts

Settings: Modern AU; Terra is the new kid at Aqua’s small private school

Rating: K+

Notes:  @mimiplaysgames sent me a post with some High School Aus and one was “Person A doodling on Person B’s arm while not paying attention in class” and I just had this sweet image of Aqua and Terra getting highly distracted in the middle of class. I also like to picture him as an artist sometimes so this captured that too. As much as I love them as childhood friends sometimes it’s fun to play with if they haven’t known each other since childhood too!

AO3

Stars

Aqua was very relieved she was a morning person when she saw her quarter schedule with organic chemistry right at the top. That was just mean to any teenager who couldn’t function before a certain hour.

Considering when she walked into the science lab most all her classmates looked like they were zombies even though it was two months into the school year seemed to prove her point. She peeked around the tables set up to face the front of the room, maneuvering down the aisle to her assigned seat. She usually stopped by to say good morning to Tifa but she wasn’t at her table yet; she probably begged Cloud to stop for breakfast making them late once again.

A few other classmates who were awake enough nodded or waved to Aqua which she politely responded to. As far as private schools went, hers wasn’t the worst but it was small. Classes were usually combined with other grades to make them a little bigger, but it also meant teachers were more able to help since the classes were so small. That she did like, though she could do without the strict dress code sometimes.

She stopped at her table, a smile pulling at her lips when she saw a body hunched over the surface, mess of brown hair sticking up from where his face was tucked onto his arms.

Aqua carefully sat down at the stool, placing her bag on the table as to not scare him but it didn’t work.

Terra popped his head up, sleepy blue eyes watching her.

“Didn’t mean to wake you up,” she said, trying not to laugh as she went to pull out her books.

“Better than an alarm clock,” he murmured. He leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms over his head and leaving the contents of what he was sleeping on out in the open.

She tried not to pry and respect her lab partner’s privacy but it was always hard not to want to see what he had drawn all over his chemistry notes. Sure, they sat together every morning in this class, but she really only knew him for about two months now. He was quiet and kept to himself more often than not so Aqua didn’t want to push it by getting too nosey. Terra seemed so surprised the first time she complimented his art that she thought maybe it was pushy of her to look without asking.

“Early morning?” Aqua asked, dropping her bag by her feet.

“That’s what I get for having a dad who’s a teacher.” Terra yawned slightly, dropping his hands back to the table.

“Oh, that’s right. I almost forgot. He teaches World History right? For the freshman and sophomores?”

“Yeah,” Terra said. “Probably because he didn’t wanna have to teach me again.”

Aqua was about to ask what it was like having to be taught by your parent but Tifa’s voice echoed slightly outside the door. Sure enough there she was half in the doorway, hands full with a coffee cup and a brown bag as she talked to someone still in the hallway; chances are it was Cloud who had a different class first period. Tifa smiled and waved when she caught Aqua’s eyes, scurrying in as their teacher walked in behind her.

“Morning,” Tifa said, checking over her shoulder to make sure Mr. Highwind was still setting up. “Here, snuck you something but eat it quick before he notices.” Tifa dropped the brown bag into Aqua’s hands.

“Oh, you didn’t have to do that, but thank you,” she said while Tifa was already walking to her table across from Aqua.

“It’s nothing,” Tifa waved her off. “Happy Friday.”

Aqua pulled open the bag to see one of her favorite treats sitting there. Her stomach growled just at the sight. “You remembered my mom is on a health food kick didn’t you?”

“I got you, girl,” Tifa said with a smile over her coffee.

Aqua reached in to pull out the chocolate frosted donut in all its sugary glory. It was a sight for sore eyes; what kind of insane person banned chocolate from a household? She was about to take the biggest bite humanly possible when she glanced over to Terra. Yeah, was probably good not to eat like a slob in front of probably the cutest boy in school.

He was looking back down at his notebook, pen in his hand as he aimlessly drew something on the lined paper.

“You want to split it?” she asked.

Terra looked up, a sort of smile on his lips. “And deprive you of much missed sugar? How could I.”

“I am a generous person, I can always share my sugar. Plus if I don’t shove this whole thing in my mouth right now, Mr. Highwind will take it.”

“Fair point.” Terra held out his hand as Aqua broke the donut in half, placing one piece in his hand.

As much as she wanted to savor the sweet tastes, she had to eat it in just a few bites or risk getting yelled at for having food in the lab. Terra on the other hand kept most of it on his notebook, just eating a small bite at a time.

Terra he was…he was something.

New kids didn’t come in too often, only a handful every now and then so it was a little bit of a surprise at the beginning of her junior year there was not only a new teacher but a new student too. Terra was a year older but he was in most her classes as seniors usually were. Most the time students flocked to the new kids as they were, well, new and shiny so to speak. Some of the more popular kids did try with Terra but he was a mix of unreceptive to social situations and also just sort of looked intimidating with his tall stature and sharp facial features that most kind of gave up. The more athletically inclined students tried too thinking someone like him was born to play football, but he never had any interest in that either.

Even Aqua who always tried to be accepting with everyone wasn’t sure what to make of him when she was assigned to be his lab partner for the semester. It didn’t really take that long to get a different opinion of him though.

He wasn’t frightening or intimidating at all; he was quiet. He didn’t really voice his thoughts very much nor did he really even talk back whenever she tried to talk to him in class but his eyes were expressive, he was listening to her and engaging even if he didn’t vocally say anything. She knew by the calluses, the dried paint, the ink smudges that showed up on his hands sometimes that despite the fact most people thought he had to be a jock, he was an artist.

In the two months she shared a table with him for 45 minutes almost every day she knew he was gentle and patient, thoughtful but still had a sense of humor. That he really only opened up to people when he felt comfortable and she hoped he did feel comfortable with her. Because she liked him…a lot; it was probably best not to think about how much.

“Is it not good?” she asked, watching him pick at the last bit of the donut.

“Hmm? Oh, no, it’s fine,” he said.

“Then why are you looking at it like it killed your dog?”

He snorted, smiling pulling at his lips enough so she could see his dimples coming out. She took a little bit of pride in the fact she was pretty sure most the school didn’t even know he had them, but she did.

“I’m not a big sweets person.” Though he did pop the last of it in his mouth.

“Is it too late to switch lab partners?”

“I don’t think difference in food tastes qualifies in swapping lab partners.” His smile always made his eyes look a lot brighter, made his face softer.

Aqua had no idea why the girls in this school weren’t throwing themselves at him, well, not that she was complaining. It was kind of nice not to feel like she had to compete with other girls just to get someone she liked to look at her; though it would be nice if she could finally convince him to sit at their table for lunch but baby steps. He had a comfort level just like everyone else.

“But it’s like I tell my brother,” Terra said, propping his chin up in his hand as he tapped his pen with the other. “More for you then.”

It was hard not to smile. “That is something I can get behind.”

“Miss Lockheart,” Mr. Highwind’s rough voice boomed in the room. “I do hope that drink of yours is covered.”

“Of course,” Tifa smiled, holding the cup up slightly.

“Alright, let’s get started then. We’re about to start a new section and no, I haven’t graded your tests yet so don’t bother asking. Open your books and let’s get a move on.”

Aqua admittedly did enjoy school and learning, but even chemistry first thing in the morning could be a little much for her. She followed along in the book, listened, took notes, asked questions when she needed to and sometimes she still couldn’t quite follow. Terra on the other hand would spend class occasionally looking up to write notes in his messy handwriting but usually filled his pages with more drawings than anything else.

She knew he paid attention and she knew he was smart as she managed to get him to study with her for the past test during a shared study hall. She just wished she had the ability to listen and absorb like he did.

It was also so distracting to watch him focus on the paper, biting his lower lip every so often as he finished another small drawing; mainly because it was much better than whatever Mr. Highwind was talking about.

“I like that one,” she whispered, reaching over to tap a small portrait of a boy. Aqua didn’t know who he was or if he was anyone, but Terra drew the boy with bright eyes and a toothy grin, hair sticking up all over the place.

Terra didn’t look too surprised when he glanced up at her, maybe he had gotten used to her compliments now. “Yeah? It’s my brother.”

Aqua clicked her tongue. “He’s a cutie.”

“I’m not telling him that,” Terra snorted softly, going back to drawing on the other side of the page.

“And why not?”

He shook his head. “Pretty girl like you telling him he’s cute? It’ll go straight to his head.”

Aqua blinked at Terra, her being the one unsure what to say for once. That was the first time he ever said anything about her looks, and he seemed to realize it too as he quickly looked back up to the board to see where Mr. Highwind was.

She did the same but it was even harder to concentrate now. Did Terra really think she was pretty? Would it mean anything even if he did? She certainly didn’t think she was, well, not compared to some of the girls here. It probably didn’t mean anything, how could it?

Aqua went back to try and take some notes but nearly jumped out of her skin when she felt Terra gently tap her arm. She looked over to see him watching her, pen still in his other hand.

“Can I see your arm?”

She must’ve looked confused because he gave her a smile.

“You always say nice things about, ah, you know, when I draw. I thought I could, well, um, do something for you.” He paused. “Helps me concentrate.”

Aqua wasn’t sure what to say so she just nodded, extending her arm onto the table. He gave her a small smile in thanks and carefully leaned over. She almost jumped again when she felt him put his hand on her arm but it was almost reassuring in a way.

The ballpoint of the pen was cool on her skin, she could almost feel the ink drawing onto her skin. Her mom would probably kill her but Aqua honestly didn’t care, not when she watched Terra’s simple lines turn into beautiful curves of her name. It wasn’t like she never saw her name written before, but not like this, not with such elegant script and not from him. While she was aware he probably knew her name, he never actually said it to her before. Seeing it spelled so gracefully on her made her chest feel a little light.

She thought that would be it when he reached the final curve of the last “a” in her name but he moved his hand about her name, drawing a quick half-moon, moving to some wispy clouds she wasn’t even sure how he could do with a single colored pen but he did. Then there were the stars. He drew them all around, different sizes, different shapes but it was mesmerizing to watch.

Aqua had zero idea what was going on in class, but she could care less.

“You wear them a lot,” he said, voice hushed as he finished another line. “The stars. Your bag, your jewelry so it makes me think of you.”

“It’s beautiful,” she breathed. Not even just the drawing, she never knew he noticed so much about her.

He snorted, like he didn’t quite believe it. “Just doodles.”

“You should be a tattoo artist, you’re really good at this.”

“Yeah, you tell my dad that, please, I’d love to see it.”

“Miss Queen, Mr. Hale,” Mr. Highwind’s voice echoed so much Aqua nearly fell off her stool while Terra looked up, pen slipping from his hand. Mr. Highwind was staring at the both of them, which meant so was most the class now. “Do either of you plan on paying attention at all this period or do you have more important things to discuss? Cause by all means, don’t let me get in the way.”

The snickers started and Aqua felt her face heat up; she could even see Tifa and that glint in her eyes knowing Aqua was never going to be able to live this down.

Mr. Highwind was clearly waiting for an answer but her stomach was sinking so much that she not only got herself called out but Terra too who probably felt more embarrassed than she was.

“No, sir,” he said, his voice surprisingly firm.

“Pay attention, please,” Mr. Highwind said because turning back to the board to continue the lecture.

There was still some giggling but mostly everyone went back to their own books and notes. Aqua risked a look over to Terra who had already let go of her arm.

“Sorry,” he mouthed to her, but still with that half smile of is.

She shook her head to let him know it was fine, but it was also the first time she got to see the drawing he did in full as she brought her arm back towards her. He might’ve just been doodling, but it was beautiful. The fact he picked up on so many nuances about her with just the small conversations they had spoke so much about him as a person.

Aqua looked up to try and tell him how much she loved it but he was already grinning at her, toothy smile that she now knew his brother must’ve gotten from him. There was still so much she wanted to know about Terra, so much she wanted to just be around him and the type of energy he brought. Others might not see it, but she sure as hell did.

She picked up her pen and quickly wrote a few words down before sliding the notebook to him.

Will you eat lunch with us today?

She tried not to bother him and let him do things at his own speed but she just had to try. This was a person she wanted around so much more. He may not know it yet but she did; he was special.

Terra laughed lightly, but he picked up his pen and reached over.

Yes.

[finn-nelson-for-the-win]

Before the World Stops Turning: Pt.4

Hello lovely people of Tumblr! I know it’s been a while since I last posted, but alas! I’m back now with the latest chapter of this fic. This chapter (and the next one, for that matter) is a bit shorter than the prior three chapters, but I decided that this was the best way for me to keep the plot moving along and keep switching POV as I have been thus far, so it is what it is.

If you’d like to be added/removed from my tags list for this fic or my Forever Tag list, don’t hesitate to let me know!

Everything I’ve written can be found right here!

I hope you enjoy this chapter! (As always, additional notes and random commentary I have will be at the end beneath the tags...I also feel it is only fair that I warn you that my notes after this chapter are very long and unrelated to the chapter itself for the most part, so you are under no obligation to read them and/or read all of it lol)

***

Finn sat on the gray loveseat in the spare bedroom of Danny’s house—which the band has been using as a makeshift recording studio for nearly two years now—strumming idly on his acoustic guitar. Although their band was not actively working on writing and recording music, when inspiration struck, they always made a point to put it down on paper and do some rough recordings for them to go back to later.

Danny sat in front of his desk on the other side of the room with his headphones on, reviewing the audio he and Finn had recorded in the previous hours and making notes about what could be improved or what was working well; however, the quiet calm of the room was soon disturbed when Chop burst in with three cans of beer in his hands.

“Evening, gents! I come bearing gifts for two of my favorite band mates,” Chop said loudly as he tossed a beer to Danny and Finn before sitting on the ground with his back resting against the couch that Finn was occupying and opening his can of beer, “how did recording go for you lads today?”

Finn set his guitar on the ground beside the couch and sat upright, stretching and yawning deeply as his exhaustion began to catch up to him. Once seated more comfortably, Finn opened up his beer and took a long, slow drink. 

“Quite well, actually! Finn was lucky that I switched my shift at the bar with Jeremy or else I would have been at work when he decided to drop by unannounced!”

“I said I was sorry,” Finn replied with a sheepish chuckle, “plus, I called you when I was on my way over to your house. I had a really great idea for the bridge to the song that I’ve been playing around with for the last few months and I knew I’d lose it if I waited too long.” 

Finn had been at the library on his University’s campus with Archie for nearly two hours after his last lecture of the day ended, trying and failing to study for an upcoming exam in the World History class they had together; however, they had taken a break to get some snacks and rethink their study strategy when Archie received an important phone call that he needed to take.

Finn was content to just sit at the table and continue the random doodles he had been working on in the margins of his lecture notes when an idea for a song hit him like a train.

He wrote down what he could to ensure that he wouldn’t forget and gathered his belongings from the table to leave the library. Finn saw Archie talking on the phone in a more populated area of the library where speaking on the phone would not be a disturbance and let him know that they could just pick up where they left off after class later this week before practically sprinting to his truck and speeding over to his apartment. 

Before Finn had even left his apartment after getting his guitar, he was on the phone with Danny letting him know that he was on his way over.

“I know, Finn, I’m just giving you a hard time! After what you recorded today, I can definitely see why you wanted to record this before the idea passed…it’s not perfect quite yet, but it definitely has potential and I think this song is gonna be something really special when it’s all pieced together.” 

“That’s fucking great! Good job, mate!” Chop replied as he ruffled Finn’s hair in praise, earning an annoyed chuckle and smirk from his mate as he fixed his hair.

“Do you know if Archie updated the details about our next show? He posted about it on his profile earlier this week, but has anyone posted it to the band page yet?” Chop asked before taking another swig of his beer. 

“Yeah! Arch was on the phone with the booking agent for the venue before I headed over here because they wanted to confirm some of the final details about the event,” Finn replied, “When we were at the library they called him to let him know one of the opening acts pulled out of the show, so they just decided to extend each bands’ set a bit to compensate for that extra hour time-slot. Archie said he was going to post the updated details and offer to sell some tickets for cheap to anyone who reached out to us on a first come-first serve basis. I was in a rush to get over here though, so I didn’t really get much more detail about the situation than that…”

“Okay, great! I know the fans really love it when we do that.” Danny replied with a smile before turning his attention back to his computer.

“Yeah! And it’s always cool being able to personally deliver the tickets to fans that live around here. Has anyone asked to buy tickets?”

“I dunno…check my phone,” Finn replied to Chop as he pointed to his cell phone that sat on an empty shelf of a bookcase across the room beside Finn’s car keys. 

“Hmm…the post has a few likes and comments. There’s a couple unrelated messages from fans. Oh! One person is asking to purchase tickets from us…let’s see what they said…”

…I saw that you have a limited number of tickets available for purchase at reduced prices. I’m interested in purchasing a pair, please… 

 “Oi Finney boy! I found your girl!” Chop called with a wide grin plastered on his face.

“What are you on about this time, Chopper?” Finn asked in confusion as he tilted his head back to get the last drops of beer from the can before setting the now empty can onto the ground by his feet. 

“According to this, her name is ‘Rae’? You know…The pretty lass that shrugged you off when you tried to make conversation at the last show? Izziemarie33’s brunette mate with the really nice—“

“Okay, I think we get the idea Chop,” Finn interrupted as he quickly got to his feet and walked over to where Chop stood to grab his phone from Chop’s hands, “what do you mean you found her? I already found out who she was a while back…”

“Are you serious, Finn? And you didn’t think to tell me—your best mate in the whole world—that you learned the secret identity of your soul mate?” Chop asked incredulously as he turned away from Finn at just the right time to prevent Finn from grabbing his cell phone back from his friend.

“For fuck’s sake, Chop! She’s not my soul mate, okay? And it’s not that big of a deal…I just happened to see a post on her mate Isabella’s profile that she was tagged in as well…”

“Huh, I see…well, it’s getting pretty late and I need to get going now because I agreed to meet Alex for drinks after his closing shift at the shop and he’ll make me pay for the first round if I’m late again this time! Here’s your phone back, Finn. And don’t you dare say I never did anything for you!” Chop replied with a wink before saluting Danny and leaving the room in a hurry.

What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 

Finn looked down at the screen of his phone that Chop had just handed back to him and noticed that the current conversation that was open on his phone was a private message conversation containing a message sent less than an hour ago.

On the left side of the screen was a small square with Rae’s profile picture and her username in bolded text beside the message she had sent requesting to purchase tickets to their next show. 

Oh…so that’s what Chop meant by him finding “my girl”…

K&Q: Hiya Rae! Thank you for reaching out to us about purchasing tickets to this show… 

Finn began typing up one of the typical responses that he generally sent from the band’s profile, speaking in third person and making an effort not to use his own name.

Relax, Finn! You send messages like this to fans of the band all the time… 

Rae is just another person who is reaching out to buy tickets to one of your shows…no need to overthink things!

…You just need two tickets? No problem! :) 

Rae: Thanks for getting back to me! Yes, just two tickets, thanks.

I know your post mentioned that you guys deliver the tickets that are purchased directly to us, so should I give you my address to send them to or…?

 K&Q: Do you live in the area, Rae? We can deliver them directly to your house or meet you somewhere to drop them off for you, if you’d like?

As soon as Finn sent the message, he worried that the message could be taken the wrong way or misconstrued by Rae. This fear only intensified when the message showed that it had been opened and read but there was no indication that Rae was responding back yet. 

Finn was about to begin writing an apology for the forwardness of the prior message and to assure her that he did not mean to imply anything other than simply delivering the tickets Rae wanted to purchase when he saw the three dots in the lower corner of the screen appear, indicating that Rae was typing.

Rae: Oh, yes, of course! I actually attend Uni in the city, so if we could meet up somewhere around there, that’d be great…as long as it isn’t too far out of your way, that is? 

K&Q: No, that’s perfect, actually! There’s a cool little café on campus for us to meet at, if you’d like. I can send you the details if you don’t already know it. Is next Monday alright with you?

Rae: I have work Monday mornings, but if you’re free in the afternoon, that would be perfect! 

K&Q: Great, Monday afternoon works for me! I’ll see you then.

Finn was about to close out of the conversation when an idea popped into his head, causing his fingers to hover slightly over the touch screen keyboard of his phone as he mulled over the idea. 

Fuck it, what’s the worst that can happen?

 …Also, I’m not always good at checking messages here on the band’s profile, so if you need to meet a different day or need to contact me in the meantime, here’s my phone number…

@eveerez @tinakegg @hey1tskat1e @lurkernolonger @milllott @nutinanutshell @i-dream-of-emus @milymargot @vivammfd @bitchesbecrazy89 @arathewallflower @mallyallyandra @kneekeyta

A/N: Awwwww, our little Finnley is working up his confidence when it comes to Rae and I’m all for it! He was feeling extra suave this chapter and found a way to give Rae his phone number AND arrange a meet up with her in-person...I don’t know about all of you, but I’m very interested to see how their little meeting goes, but that’s still a little ways away (2 chapters away to be more specific, if my memory serves me right...which it probably doesn't because my memory is complete shit lol)

So...I’m content to just pretend that this chapter didn’t take me almost 2 weeks to post even though the entire fic up to and including the next chapter has been written since before I even posted the first chapter of this particular fic...

There was a VERY short period of time a couple weeks back where Uni and work weren’t the banes of my existence and I had time to actually write and edit this fic at my leisure...but that time came and went and these past couple weeks have been a real struggle for me.

I’ve been struggling to keep up with my assignments for Uni, work has been stressing me out and making me increasingly unhappy because I feel like I’m getting stuck in a rut, I’ve been stressed out financially and with recent events with my family...

But by far the most difficult part of recent weeks has been that I’ve been really struggling with my mental health as of late and I haven’t been sleeping well, eating well, taking care of myself in general, etc...I’ve also been withdrawing from my friends and isolating myself and I’ve found that as a result I was spending much less time on social media and therefore less time here on Tumblr for me to read/write/edit/post (I’m also much harder on myself when I get into this sort of mindset, so there were a few times when I’d begin editing this chapter, decide it was complete shit, and then contemplate scrapping the entire chapter/fic and starting over...I never got to that point yet, but there have been a few very close-calls).

In general, I just haven’t been in a good place recently and as much as I tried to push through it, it got the best of me and exacerbated everything that I was already dealing with, making things substantially worse.

Please do not misunderstand me when I say that I’m not telling you all of this stuff to make excuses or gain your sympathy...I just have an affinity for oversharing details of my life for little to no reason and thought that this explanation could give some context as to why I might randomly stop posting from time to time because I go through these unexplained periods of losing interest in social media and socialization in general more frequently than I would care to admit.

Ok...that’s enough for today’s edition of “Sarah venting about the random shit in her life in the Author’s Notes of her most recent fanfic chapter update even though her rant has no correlation to the content of the actual chapter she posted”

I’ll do my best to get back on the schedule of more regular posting like I was before, so there should be at least 2 or 3 chapters posted per week from here on out, but again...no promises.

If you read this entire Author’s Note, I applaud you and I think you’re top-notch because this turned out to be much longer than I had originally planned...

ANYWAYS...thank you for reading and I hope you liked this chapter...Stay awesome, my friends! :)

[merflk]

between the vain and the valuable

Pairing: ginny weasley x blaise zabini Words: 2655 Link: ao3

Wars don’t disappear when they stop – they rage on. They simply become invisible.

Ginny felt the war inside of her for years after Voldemort was defeated. She felt it in her bones, in the sensory overload she experienced, in the vicious pumping of her heart, screaming for something.

She started tearing herself apart.

She took boxing classes to get rid of the rage and fought until her knuckles were scarred and still bleeding. She threw herself into Quidditch and kept going and going until she had broken more bones than she could count.

They were talking about locking her up – just to help her, just to guide her – when she found another way.

It was a muggle therapist she’d started visiting in secret who suggested painting – and when Ginny took up the brush, it became art.

It became splashes of red and black and green, blotches of dark, crooked light scratching the surface, smudges of colour wiped across the canvas with her bare hands, paint under her nails, paint in her hair, paint in her ears and eyes – she became art.

And finally, finally, the storm had an outlet.

Her mother cried when she saw the first painting. Not everyone understood them. The important thing was that she understood them. So she kept painting.

Three years after the war, she had her first exposition. She should have been nervous, maybe, but she wasn’t. She was proud of her work. She was a Gryffindor – baring her soul to the world was something she did bravely.

She rented out a small hall and handed out invitations on the street. The exposition was completely open to the public and on the night itself she was surprised by who showed up and who didn’t.

There was only one who shook her.

Blaise Zabini owned an art museum, so he was always looking out for new talents. One of his meetings got called off that night and since he had nothing better to do, he decided to drop by Ginny Weasley’s exposition. If it was awful, at least he’d have something to complain about.

And it was awful. Just not in the way he’d expected.

She saw him just as his eyes fell on one of her biggest canvases. The work was a blur of red and white, ragged and chaotic. When Blaise looked at him, his eyes widened.

He stared at the canvas, entranced, a look of horror spreading across his face. It was like he was seeing something other than the painting – as if it transported him somewhere else. To another time.

His expression triggered something in Ginny – she wanted to paint­ – and she walked up to him. She stopped beside him and looked at the painting with him.

“You look like I felt,” she said.

Blaise kept his eyes on the painting. When she glanced at him, she thought he might be tearing up.

“It’s raw,” he said, his voice rough and crackling like a smouldering fire.

“We are raw,” Ginny answered.

They looked at the painting again. The buzz around them seemed to disappear.

“What’s it called?” Blaise asked.

“Riddle.”

Because Ginny Weasley did not hide. She called things as they were.

Now Blaise looked at her and Ginny was taken aback by the pure fire in his gaze. He was a burning fuse.

“When can I call you?” he asked.

“Anytime,” Ginny stammered, a little startled and not considering how this might sound to someone else.

“Good.”

Blaise took one more long look at the painting and then he whirled around, walking away from it with brusque steps. Before long, he had disappeared outside, leaving Ginny baffled and a little cold.

-*-

As it turns out, Blaise Zabini took things very literally, and anytime meant anytime.

That’s why a week later, Ginny woke up in the middle of the night because of the incessant ringing of her cell phone. She muffled a groan in her pillow and picked it up, mumbling an annoyed greeting.

“Ginevra. I’m glad I caught you.”

This time, she groaned out loud. “Seriously?” she asked in frustration.

He was quiet for a moment and she wondered whether he was checking the time. “You did say anytime,” he then said, almost apologetically.

“I meant any human time, good God, Zabini. It’s sleeping time right now.”

“I am a diagnosed insomniac.”

“Well, my condolences.” But despite her grumbling, she did push herself up on her forearms. “Why’d you call?”

“I’d like to offer you a job.”

“You- what?”

“Only temporarily, of course. I mean to put together an exposition on post-war art. I’d like you to put it together.”

“That- okay- whoa, uh- why, exactly?”

He was quiet for a moment. “Why do I want to have this exposition?”

“Why me?” she blurted out.

“You seem to have an eye for it.”

That was one way to put it.

“Okay. Alright. We’ll talk about it.”

“We are talking about it, Ginevra.”

“No, we are not. I am not a functioning human being before I’ve had my first cup of coffee and it is technically Wednesday already. So.”

He sighed. “I suppose,” he said begrudgingly.

Well, if he was going to wake her up in the middle of the night, he’d better suck it up. He could have expected this.

“We’ll talk,” she promised, “Tomorrow. I’ll ring you.” She wondered for a moment. “Any particular time you’re usually asleep?” she then asked.

“I’m an insomniac,” he repeated.

She waited.

“I suppose I normally nod off between two and four.”

“Now we’re being honest. I’ll call you in the morning then.”

“Fine.”

“I’m going back to sleep now. Goodnight, Blaise.”

His name rolled off her tongue without any hesitation. It felt right.

“Goodnight, Ginevra.”

*-*

She did call him in the morning – after her cup of coffee – and they came to an arrangement that propelled her into the world of museum art hunting. It was a world full of meetings and expositions and networking and soon coffee and Blaise were her closest companions.

Blaise didn’t talk much, but he was amazing at his job. Possibly because of his lack of sleep, he got more work done in a day than most people could in a week. He was sarcastic and passionate and had seemed to found his true match in the subject he’d chosen for this exposition. Finding post-war art almost became an obsession for him and Ginny was astonished by the fire that art could light in him. It was beautiful.

They spent hours in his office at the museum, him behind the desk, her in his green velvet lounging chair, a notebook on her pulled up knees and cups of coffee beside them. They discussed what they were looking for endlessly and looked over pictures of artworks together, comparing them and lining them up, trying to decide which ones would add to their collection organically and which one would interrupt the flow.

Soon, the velvet chair in Blaise’s office became like a second home to Ginny. It was comfortable, and she felt comfortable with Blaise. She started taking off her shoes when she came in, pacing the floors on her socks or pulling up her legs onto the chair. She couldn’t sit still very well and Blaise had to get used to the way she’d move in a chair when she was thinking hard – regularly ending up with her feet anywhere but the floor.

He was a complete opposite to her. His fire was in his eyes and voice – he stayed still in his chair for hours, like a statue, working until his brain must have got fried. Ginny had never seen anyone work that hard, except maybe Percy. There was something almost feverous about it. It was as if Blaise was exorcising something through his work.

And, considering their subject, maybe he was.

She started bringing her sketchbook besides her usual notepad after about a month. It just felt right, somehow. The museum had become a safe place for her.

It wasn’t long before he caught her.

“What’s that?”

She looked at the open sketch book on her knees, considering the question. What exactly was it?

“It’s my sketch book,” she then said. She held it up half-heartedly, just high enough for him to glimpse the contents.

“It’s…” He fumbled with words for a moment. “Realistic.”

“Ah, yes.” She smiled at him. “The war is for canvases. I can’t put that down on paper. But I concentrate better when I’m doodling, so I’ve taken up doing portraits in pencil.”

“Were you drawing me?”

She had been, actually. She’d been drawing him a lot lately. He had the chiselled face of a model, after all, and his subtle expressions were a challenge she had found herself unable to pass up on.

She glanced up at him sheepishly. “Do you mind?”

She never asked, for fear that people would say they did mind. That was wrong of her, she knew that. But she needed it. And she wasn’t bothering anyone.

But Blaise shook his head. “No. I don’t mind.”

She smiled at him in relief. “Thank you.”

“Will you show me?”

She hesitated for a moment, but then shrugged and held up her sketch book for him to see. “Least I could do, I suppose.”

He didn’t take it. “I don’t want you to feel forced to.”

Ginny smiled. “Then only look at this page, please.”

He nodded and carefully took the sketch book from her outstretched hand, as if it was something valuable. He looked at the sketch she’d made of him carefully. “It’s pretty,” he then said.

Ginny felt a blush bloom on her cheeks. “Thanks.”

*-*

Blaise’s insomnia still disturbed her a little. She worked all-nighters with him, so she knew what he was like in the middle of the night – normal. It’s like he never tired. He just kept going, robotically, even if the shadows beneath his eyes were far darker than was healthy and his skin looked paler in the worst weeks. She knew that sometimes, he didn’t get a wink of sleep for days, and that if he slept at all it was mostly a few hours in the middle of the day. But even during this time, he was a very light sleeper and the slightest sound could wake him.

The first time Blaise fell asleep while Ginny was there, she held her breath. It was intimate in a way she’d never been with anyone before. Blaise had to be very comfortable with her if his mental health allowed him to fall asleep with her in the room. She’d just been doodling a little in her chair, thinking over some of the things they’d just discussed, when she suddenly realised he’d been very quiet for a while. When she looked up, he’d nodded off, and it was something magical.

Fifteen minutes later someone came barging in with a question even though they knew this was the only period of the day during which Blaise had even a chance at falling asleep and he finally had. Blaise woke immediately and aside from a little drowsiness in his eyes he was just as sharp as always.

Ginny couldn’t help herself – she lashed out at the girl who’d come in. She was harsh, and a little rude, but, honestly, couldn’t she have let him sleep?

But the girl just glanced at Blaise and then told Ginny, as if Blaise wasn’t in the room at all, that Blaise had told his employees that if anyone ever refrained from letting him know something important just because he was asleep, he would fire them.

That baffled Ginny and the girl quickly left, leaving Ginny to vent her anger at Blaise himself, because that was ridiculous, he was an insomniac, he needed all the sleep he could get!

He let her rage. When she quieted down, he just looked at her seriously, sternly, and told her that it was his choice.

She stamped out of his office and did not come back for two days. When she finally showed up again, he just arched an eyebrow at her, as if to ask whether she would start again. Ginny just grumbled and went back to her spot on his chair.

(And if her collection now had a painting of frustrated green blotches, that didn’t mean anything, of course.)

It wasn’t until five months into their partnership that she actually saw him sleep.

They were nearing the end of their hard work: the hall had been set up, the invitations sent out, the paintings collected. They were just tying up loose ends now. The exposition was only a week away. They were supposed to meet in the hall where the exposition would be to hang up all the paintings. They’d considered hiring a crew to do it, but they knew they would only be content if they did it themselves.

Ginny arrived at ten in the morning, her signature cup of coffee in her hand, ready to ask Blaise to wait a moment so she could finish if before entering the room with the valuable artwork. What she found was nothing short of a miracle, to her.

Blaise was sitting in a wooden chair in the middle of the room. The paintings were around him, draped in protective material or out in the open, stacked together carefully so nothing would get damaged. It looked like chaos and Ginny could just imagine Blaise looking around, taking all of it in with a frown on his face, trying to absorb the atmosphere he wanted to create.

But he wasn’t looking around. He wasn’t even awake.

There was something infinitely beautiful about the scene. There was Blaise, surrounded by the war, by all of it, captured in paint and brushstrokes and canvas, and he finally looked like he’d found some peace.

He lounged in the chair like he was doll someone had put there, his head nodding forward a little and his lips slightly parted – blissfully, beautifully asleep.

She couldn’t stop herself.

Ginny threw out her coffee and entered the hall. She pulled out a chair as quietly as she could and sat down on a fair distant, careful not to wake him. Then she pulled out her sketchbook and pencil case and, with tears in her eyes, she started sketching him.

*-*

On the night of the exposition, everything felt softer around her. They had created a display of the war in all its horror and emotion, but there was something peaceful about it now – as if they were processing it by showing their pain to others. Even Blaise, who hadn’t painted anything, must have felt that way.

They stood beside each other in the middle of the hall. Around them, over a hundred people walked along the walls, looking at the paintings and discussing them softly. Ginny was holding a sparkling glass of champagne and she felt content. Proud, even.

“We did it,” she told him.

“Yes.” Blaise smiled lightly, as if he couldn’t entirely believe it. “We really did something.”

“I’m not sure what I’ll do with my life now.” She was only half-joking, and she thought he could see it.

“Well,” he said, his smile turning a little playful, “Personally, I’m planning on getting a good night of sleep.”

She felt a rush of warmth setting through her chest and she knew it poured from her eyes as she smiled at him. “I know what I’ll do,” she told him. She looked around her at the world she had created in these five short months, and then at the man beside her, scarred, damaged, healing.

He was looking at her with awe in his eyes and a tenderness that she thought might keep the entire world together.

“I’ll paint,” she said.

*-*

(Six months later, they held another exposition, named The World After. Its main piece was a huge canvas of a man sleeping on a chair surrounded by paintings.)