#green-eyednymph

[green-eyednymph]

I simply want to feel like I’m not a bother to anyone. I no longer wish to be told later on about how I’ve been a burden, without them ever saying it. I wish to have peace. I only want to feel genuinely loved. I don’t want to be told by everyone that I need to continue to do more, when I don’t have much else to give. How is one to take proper care of themselves, whilst everyone around them demands more of them each day? I am but a tool, a machine who responds to the users input to follow through with a function and a purpose. I find it difficult to express myself because I’ve always been treated as lesser than. I’ve always been expected to be a good foot soldier and persevere.

Well.

I’m still here. But at what cost? I’ve persevered, I had grit, I had a great many things. But the cost? It’s cost me a lot of my talents, a lot of time I could’ve spent crafting my talents, into myself. It’s cost me years of pain, anxiety, and sufferance. I am less human now than I ever was, as a byproduct of being the pawn everybody wanted to use. Someone told me once that I was less than dirt, and occasionally the memory surfaces and I wonder if it’s true. How could my existence be important? I will never make a difference on this planet because everyone I’ve been around has made sure I never wanted to try. The rejection and pain I’ve suffered, the simple desire to be cared for in the same way as others; it was just too much to ask.

I will never be normal. I will never be desirable. I will never meet expectations. I will forever be the failure, the let down, the disappointment, the disrespectful one. I am nothing good or positive. I take but never give. I will remain where I am, for the rest of my life. For even if I were to leave, I’ll still always be a disappointment in their eyes.

[green-eyednymph]

Breathe

Relax the tension in your body

Breathe

Begin again.

[green-eyednymph]

My beautiful boo 😍💜💛

[green-eyednymph]

Hi there! My name is Hyde, and here is my fuzzy tum if you would like to give me some love with belly rubs! I love snuggles, the sun, lasers, sleeping at the end of the bed, and reminding you that I'm here for you!

[green-eyednymph]

Even when you want nothing more than to curl up in your hideaway, you get back up on those feet that have carried you thus far, to continue on your journey. Don’t give up on yourself or this life you’re trying to create.

Tell the whole world:

This is who I am and I am not afraid of what that means.

[green-eyednymph]

I have no idea what's going on in my life right now aside from the fact that I cut my hair and I'm more unhappy than I'd like to admit to anyone. Being overwhelmed with everything like this has got me so stressed that everything I say is like my anxiety turning into word vomit. Yippie!

[green-eyednymph]

quirky update:

I did cut my hair awhile back, its grown out enough that it's now shaggy like I wanted it to be

work still sucks as usual, but I still have one so there's that

bills are being paid, albeit draining me financially but I'm surviving

I look like a troll most days but if I smile it's not so bad

conclusion:

life sucks friends, but it could be worse. take care of yourself as you need to, ask loved ones for time if they won't understand what you're going through/ask for support if they will or might. be strong, resilient, and persevere. you will get through this.

peace and love,

green-eyednymph ✌🏼💛🌻

[green-eyednymph]

I’m starting a new doodle/comic strip, either randomly or like with this one, pertaining to my life in some way. I got bored at work, so here’s to Version 1 of sad guy specials!

[green-eyednymph]

I have no idea what's going on in my life right now aside from the fact that I cut my hair and I'm more unhappy than I'd like to admit to anyone. Being overwhelmed with everything like this has got me so stressed that everything I say is like my anxiety turning into word vomit. Yippie!

[green-eyednymph]

Here you go Anon! Feel free to message me or ask me something again. :)

[green-eyednymph]

Messy hair & lips 💋

[green-eyednymph]

A few bad flowers doesn't make a beautiful garden any less breathtaking; the same applies to humans.

Elizabeth Van Den Broeke (via @green-eyednymph)

[green-eyednymph]

Hey guys!

So I changed my URL from lizzymayjo16 to green-eyednymph, nothing got deleted or added, it's still the same blog. Just wanted to let you know, thanks for following me!!