#got home from work now Im hungry
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// AYO I'll cook and then I'll be around!!
#got home from work now Im hungry#im making vegan burgers with potato wedges hmmmm#I hope yall are having a good day so far!!#outofrunes
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i just fucking hate having ptsd all of it. so many stupid fucking things send me into fucking hysterics it sucks and i hate it and i dont want itttt anymore i dont want it.
#i literally like. i didnt tell u guys bc it was embarassing#but i had to hype myself up to eat a fucking orange the other day. like i was shaking and crying and i nearly threw up.#bc it fucking reminded me of All that and also bc its one of the only foods i got to eat outside ofm my one meal a day#while i was living there. bc my coworker gave me oranges sometimes#and one time she gave me a whole bag of cuties which was wonderful of her i miss her#but i pretty much like. bc during m-f i had a meal at work#and i could get something from the vending machine if i needed to#but on the weekends i had to either order food (which would always make me insanely nauseous bc of. the money stuff. yk) or just eat#what i had in my room bc i couldnt use the kitchen bc the roommates would be mad at me#and they might kick me out and id be actually fucked. its so crazy looking back that i genuinely the entire time i fucking lived there even#b4 the breakup the entire time i was in terror that theyd evict me. bc i wouldnt have been able to do anything abt it#i mean thats why i didnt like. leave him after he . and stuff. both bc i thought i didnt deserve anything better and bc i was terrified#theyd evict me and i wouldnt have any way to get home. it was terrifying#but ya. so for a couple weeks i rationed myself One orange per day lol. and on weekends that was all i was able to eat rly#idk. i hate ptsd. basicalllyyyy is the gist of ittt. and i keep thinking abt random fucking things they did to me#me when they jokingly tell me to starve myself when i literally have a fucking eating disorder. and when i told The Only Person i knew in#that fucking house abt it he told me i was being dramatic and i was just being greedy and etc. and then later when i got off work today i#saw on their fucking whiteboard in the kitchen i wasnt supposed to use Eat more <3 as one of their goals. while i went to sit in the garage#for the weekend eating a single fucking orange a day. god#idk. ive gotten better with eating i still have the scale but i ws able to go months without using it until the medical call the other week#and i havent used it since but. everytime i think abt all that itmakes me want to go back to it. i cant tho everyone would notice#i do still eat a wholee lot less than i did b4 washington but idk. idont remember if i even ate today i probably should but i dont feel#hungry but i cant even fucking trust that bc i Starved myself for so fucking long im too good at ignoring hunger. and i never was super in#touch with my body but im constantly numb now. idk.#ed ment#a2t#i ws gonna say more but it ws tmi + tag limit anyway. its just insane that my fucking ed wouldnt have happened if it werent for him and it#graduated i wouldnt have been isolatedinever wouldve had an ed. like 50% of my ptsd would be Gone if i just hadnt joined that discord. lol
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i did so much today im so tired
#drove to dads#popped to the store to stock up on mini pizzas#deep cleaned the moldy grimy washing machine#washed my towels#cleaned the trash from my car#spot cleaned the seats (tried to anyway)#took it to a hand car wash and scrubbed and pressure washed the car#(it hasnt looked this clean in yearssss)#vacuumed the inside of the car#came home and gave the dog a bath#did my laundry#dyed my hair#folded the sheets and towels#and drove back home (its 45 min - 1 hr each way)#im back now and need dinner. im hungry lfjskdkssk#also yesterday when i got home from work i took a nap and then got up and cleaned my room and cleaned the kitchen and did the dishes#oh i unloaded the washer before i left today too lol#i also stayed up journalling bc so much shit happened at work that day#ok anyway#im tired fjdfks#oh also i made a tiktok. well i uploaded one i didnt rly film anything
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going to go eat dinner and see how i feel about my roommate after
#jaytalking#our ra wants to do like. a check in meeting which makes sense#but like. my roommate went back home for an orthodontist appointment and was like. tonight won’t work#but is back now. and got back to the dorm before i did from class. and it’s not like the meeting is meant to take forever#so it’s just like. ugh. now i have a very small window to get dinner in before i work tomorrow and also im like. playing fuckin intermediary#bc my roommate doesn’t have the app we use to communicate with our RA so i’m bringing that up tomorrow!!#bc i don’t want to do that shit for any other potential meetings. bc i also did this for the roommate agreements#it’s like a punishment for wanting to have thing planned#though also fuck my RA for just randomly texting me about it last night like dude. you know what else is possible? a timesheet for this shit#anyways. we’ll see if the time even works tomorrow#godddddd i want to scream but i think it’s just because im very hungry#i did survive class though. was not hungry then#though i am pissed off about this person who complains about doing critique like it’s an ART CLASS#EVERYONE ELSE CAN GO WITHOUT COMPLAINING. SHUT UP!!!!!!
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#Ugh I only meant to sleep like 30mins when I got home from work#Now its 7:30.... 3 hours later#And now im hungry :(#Alas there is no meat - I haven't shopped#Maybe I will eat a can of sardines in penance#Or icecream like a daft heathen....
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obsessed!geto suguru x f!reader
cw & notes: ok this might NOT be everyone’s cup of tea if you’re a 100% independent girlboss femdom femininomenon, A LOT OF possessiveness, solved misunderstandings, dubcon, oral sex, borderline yandere, no curse au + geto works at jjk high but it’s not jjk high ykwim hbdjsh and ur close with his students
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
obsessed!geto who watches your every move, looks at every text message notification you get, every person you wave to. of course, he isn’t looking for any evidence that you’re cheating, no! he knows you’d never.
you two are cuddling on the couch together, laying on his lap with your head nestled under his chin and you legs draped over while he rested his cheek on your head. he’s in the middle of rubbing your back and watching whatever you had on your phone when he sees texts you got from a name he’s never seen before.
higuruma
hey, i hope this is the right number
i got ur stuff, let’s meet when your husband goes to work, yeah?
geto was silent for a few seconds before subtly tightening his grip on you
“who’s that, angel?”, geto almost seethed, he was trying his best not to make it sound like he was upset but it tipped him the fuck off.
‘who the fuck is that? who is she talking to?’
you only smiled, looking back at geto.
“it’s yuji’s lawyer friend, remember?”, you rested your head in the crook of his neck, somehow oblivious to the change in his demeanor.
“yuji.. ah, yuji’s lawyer friend. and you’re meeting with him why? and when i go to work—honey what’s going on?”
“geto..” you lifted you head, turning to him and slightly frowning, “it’s so he can come to meet with me and drop off stuff for yuji while he’s gone for a school trip”
“mm.. i’m gonna come with you, pretty girl..” he attacked your face with kisses as u giggle and try to dodge them.
“sugu!! you’re so protective over me! it’s not like im a baby, i’m not gonna get kidnapped” you huffed, lightly slapping his bicep. geto only hummed and enveloped his lips in yours.
the next day, poor higuruma couldn’t help but nervously chuckle as geto silently stood behind you as he dropped off yuji’s stuff.
obsessed!geto who knows all your needs. all of them.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
“sugu! i told you im not hungry right now” you whine as he brings in two bags of takeout. ten minutes later, suguru is feeding you as you scroll on your phone. smiling as he knew that at the end of the day, he knew your needs better than you did.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
“sugu i really wanna go to the beach next week, let’s go pleasseee?”
“mm-mm, doll, your period starts in three days and the day we go is when you feel pain the most. so, no, we’re not going and you’ll thank me later”
you frowned and gave him the silent treatment which only lasted for two hours . three days later, you did get your period and the day that the beach was planned, geto was at the foot of your bed, massaging your feet as he turned your heating pad up, his eyebrows furrowed as he hated the sight of you in pain
“sugu.. i love you”, you groan as he relieved your pain little by little.
“‘love you too, pumpkin”
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
“fuck, angel.. yeah.. i like you better when you’re not so fucking bratty and i can hear my dick inside you instead of that little mouth of yours always running”
he knew you were horny. he slipped his cock into your mouth as a means to shut your bratty little mouth up. you’d been teasing him for hours and he just had enough after he came home from a long day. you’d sent him dirty text after text, lingerie pics to nudes, even videos of you playing with yourself
he just couldn’t help but pin you down on the couch just as you got home! your bratty little mouth protesting about him being so whipped for your pussy but he shuts you up with your favorite treat!
he’d used your mouth, his hands shoved in your hair as he moaned from the sigh of your teary eyes.
“fuuuck, i’m close, angel. you want a treat for finally being a good girl? open up that throat of yours baby”
obsessed!geto who always does a background check of everyone you know. he has to make sure his soon-to-be wife doesn’t have any dangerous people in her life or—god forbid—, anyone with even an ounce of a crush on her!
after he’s doing cutting off the people he doesn’t like in your life (with reason of course! he knows what’s best for you <3), he immediately goes off to you, surprising you with a smack of your ass or a rough kiss on the lips, whatever he sees first.
if you’re not there though, he’ll jack off to all the photos he takes of you. sometimes he takes them in secret, sometimes he takes them in brough daylight. he doesn’t have to hide it anymore now that you’re dating but he never stopped. he loves you in all forms and he loves the effect you have on his cock. he’ll have his boney hand wrapped around it, sliding up and down as he whimpers your name.
“you’re so.. so fucking sexy, mm..mmphf!”
just geto who’s obsssed with you >.<
#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk x reader smut#rina journal 📝#geto suguru x reader#geto suguru smut#geto suguru x reader smut#geto smut#geto suguru#obsessed!geto
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Logan Howlett x Squirter!Reader
oneshot (4.5k words) - You know how to make yourself squirt, but its no easy process. You just accepted your reality of it only happening once in a blue moon and only when you were alone. Maybe Logan can prove you wrong. pairing - logan howlett (xmen) x f!reader tags -first time sex, oral/fingering f recieving, lots of princess, baby, sweetheart, lots of logans filthy (and whiny) mouth, one swift bite, reader has boobs and a vagina and pullable hair, nondescript body other then a few thigh/hip descriptions, squirting obvi, lots of wet everywhere, lots of praise and begging from both parties, logan will not shut up
SEND ME REQUESTS AND SHIT!!!! I WANNA KEEP WRITING!!! GIVE ME IDEAS IM THIRSTY IM HUNGRY RAAAHHHG
this is self indulgent as shit and I havent written a fic and actually posted it since i was like 15 but that fic by @silverskyeline had me inspired because I may or may not be a squirter and i needed to write it for myself. i feel like this is kinda ass butt but i tried my best and i hope its bearable :)
.・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・..
The first time it happened, it caught you off guard.
Finding yourself alone in your home with some down time, you'd sat in your office chair, legs propped up on either side of the wood and headphones slipped over your ears as you scrolled through your options, clicking the first link that piqued your interest. It was how you preferred to masturbate these days, a deep voiced man slowly working you through it, your hands a mirror image of how the man describes his methods of pleasure through your headphones.
It doesn’t take long before you’re lost in it, 13 minutes into the 24-minute audio and you've got one hand plowing your favorite dildo in and out in long, deep thrusts, angled exactly how you need it. the tip catches against your cervix and thumps up against your g spot in one fluid movement, your head thrown back in breathless euphoria. The voice switches between each ear, alternating as it groans praise and direction between its moans of pleasure. You’re choking on the feeling of it all, moans coming out in hiccups and cries as you desperately try to maintain some dignity. The voice slips into a gravely come on baby, rub that clit while I fuck you, cum on this cock sweetheart and suddenly your other hand joins the mix, sloppily rubbing circles into your drenched bud. The combo of the two motions, drilling yourself in mind numbing strokes with your one hand while your other sneaks down and rubs your clit, isn’t one you explore often.
But God is it fucking good.
In a flash your vision is white, it all hits you just as the voice in your ear instructs you. It’s all too much and good lord he starts counting down from 3, and somehow just as he’s growling one, baby cum for me, cum on this fucking dick, your back is arching, and your legs are shaking. Even with your head back and eyes rolled you could feel how sloppy you had gotten, drenched all the way up to you palm and wrist now. The sound was *filthy*, the audible noise of the floor beneath you getting drenched, your desperate gasps and attempts to stay quiet through the torment, and the sloppy plap… plap… of the toy inside you slowly coming to a halt.
That day your eyes were opened to a whole new world. It wasn’t easy, though, and it didn’t happen like it did in porn. Instead of a stream shooting out of you like a hose, it was more of a spray that splashed out with each thrust, and it only happened when you were splayed on your back like that pleasuring yourself exactly in that matter. You never considered yourself a squirter, per say. But it was a fun thing to brag about every now and then.
it stayed something that happened between you and your toy, though. the one or two flings you'd had since the discovery never getting anywhere near the space or level of relaxation, you’d need to be in to make it happen, and you just accepted it to be something only you could only do on rare occasions alone in your bedroom.
That was until Logan came along.
The last thing you'd choose to describe Logan as a man was patient. He was short tempered and snippy, his first day in the mansion it seemed like his mission to piss everyone he saw off. But when he met you, he suddenly softened. When he told you were lucky you were pretty the first time you spoke, he meant it, not only suddenly capable of holding his tongue but speaking with a slowed assurance as he watched you. It wasn't a surprise to anyone when he quickly weaseled his way into your bed.
Although maybe you'd bragged to a friend or two once it happened, you never thought to alert Logan of your talent. As stated, patience wasn’t exactly any term to describe Logan with, and you knew it wasn’t easy in the first place, so the thought never even crossed your mind.
That was until he hovered over you, hands expertly holding your face and neck as he passionately locked his lips with yours.
The way Logan kissed was suffocating, his big hands holding you in place as he mapped every inch of your mouth, huffing to himself every time a string of saliva or a well-timed lick would make you whimper. He hadn't done anything but sit down and kiss you and you were already overwhelmed by him.
He pulled away to stare at you intensely, memorizing every bit of the filthy frame in front of him. He had you laid out underneath him, your pretty eyes blown out and wide, looking up at him as if he was your world, your hands needily grabbing at his tank top.
"Please Logan," you whimper, leaky eyes never leaving his for even a moment.
"I haven't even done anything yet, and you're already begging," he teased as he lifted your chin up to start gently laying kisses down it. You keep a hold of his forearms as he leaves wet pink spots all the way down to where your top lies, grounding yourself in his warmth as he sends shivers down your spine. He stops, grumbling at the article of clothing stopping him from devouring you.
"Use your big boy words," you tease with a smirk, pushing your chest towards him and sensually touching his chest and collarbone. Instead of using said big boy words, he growled a deep "Off." as he flicked at the silky bow nestled against your breasts.
You sigh, your efforts for null.
"I'd ask you to just rip it off, but this is vintage," you pout as you make a show of lifting off the fabric. He raised an eyebrow, half his mind shocked at the way you tease him so effortlessly, the other half wrecked by your suggestion, an image of him pouncing on you and ripping the beautiful lac top off with his claws like an animal.
It started a fire in his stomach, one that was quickly ignited by the view of your breast's falling from the tops confines as you pulled it over your head. In his eyes, they fall in slow motion, each ripple sending shockwaves down his back as he watching them sway with your movement.
Maybe the idea of ripping that pretty top off with his claws hit a little too close to home, because in a flash he's on you. He's pushing you back with a firm hand to the sternum, using it to hold you in place against the mattress as he desperately kisses down the side of your neck and to your sternum.
"Smell so fucking good," he huffs out as he kisses down your clavicle before latching his lips around your slowly hardening nipple. The feeling makes your back arch and your breath hitch, a combo that had Logan popping a sly grin between his kitten licks to your now stiff bud.
"You say that all the time," you moan out breathlessly as he flicks his tongue. He pulls away with a pop, inching up to your ear and whispering into it.
"Sorry, let me correct myself," he leans down, sultry gaze inches from your face as he growls,
"She smells so fucking good," into your ear as he cups your mound through your shorts. You should've known in that moment you were cooked, stomach aching with how badly you needed him and hips instantly trying to buck into his wrist. He laughs at your attempt and pulls away his palm, much to your dismay.
"Don't talk about what my vagina smells like," you giggle, hiding your red face from him,
"Why not? s' like peaches, sweetheart. wanna just split you open and-" he finishes his statement but tugging your head back and exposing the column of your throat, licking a long stripe from between your breast's all the way up and under your ear, his warm hand back cupping your mound and massaging the fat through your shorts.
Your breath is robbed as his mouth leaves a wet trail that cools in the air and send a shiver down your spine. Logans mouth latches back onto your erect nipples, this time your skin tingling and buzzing with sensitivity,
"shit- I need more baby, please," you plead helplessly as your hands roam over Logans shoulders and forearms, his mouth slowly working down your body with kisses and licks.
"Need what, darling," he replies, his eyes flitting up to yours deviously. You don't respond, instead opting to roll your hips up against his, hoping he'd show mercy upon seeing your desperation. You should've known better. He pins your hips down, gripping the fat of your waist with a rough palm and letting out a displeased grunt as he teases you.
"Use your big girl words," he says with a smile, using your own words against you.
You desperately try to retaliate, your palms playfully smacking against his chest and legs kicking while you giggle and yelp,
"You can't- you fucker!" You pleade, before your limbs are quickly pinned down at your sides, your legs now pinned under his as his mouth is back at your ear, stopping you dead in your tracks as he growls. I takes a shaky deep breath, regaining his composure and savoring your smell before he speaks.
"Just tell me what I want to hear so I can taste this fucking pussy, eh sweetheart? you're killing me here," his voice becoming almost whiny at the end as he grips at your hips and grinds his visibly strained bulge against your thigh. His words shoot a shiver to your core, his brazenness too much for your foggy mind,
"Please just fucking- eat me out Logan!" you whine, hips chasing his in a desperate chase for contact. He grips your face, palm rough and big holding you in place and making you gooey and submissive as he talks,
"See? Was that so hard, bub?" he quirked with teasing grin before kissing your cheek and diving down to your hips. His arms wormed their way under your thighs, head popping up to admire the way your athletic shorts squeeze the fat of your thighs around his head. The tight shorts accentuated your curves, settling into the creases in your thighs and hips and sending a shiver down his spine as he traces his finger along the seam.
Suddenly, Logan is biting you. If you asked him why, he's not sure he could tell you, but the spot just under your stomach where your thigh meets your hip looked too appetizing not to sink his teeth into. It's gentle and playful, he growls and shakes his head like a dog with a bone and it makes you squeal and swat at his back again. You tie your hands into his hair and pull him up, a big goofy grin on his face as he peers up at you through his thick lashes, clearly having no remorse for his actions as he licks his lips and teeth.
Jesus Christ hes so hot.
He swats your hands out of his hair, desperate and feral for the taste of you in his mouth. The man wastes no time sinking his face back down and into your thigh, hands gripping you firmer now, pinning you down as he growled and nestled your inner thigh with his stubble. He looks like a little kitty cat, headbutting you to coat you in his scent, fingers kneading and savoring the thick of your hips.
"Just let me play with you how I want to baby," he whines, the lilt to his voice a little surprising. It feels like the longer you tease him, the whinier he gets. Interesting.
You pat his hair in apology and scratch his scalp, his head now laying on your thigh as he strokes your stomach. “You can't bite me, Lo!” You giggle as you scold him. He props his chin up on your stomach and pays no mind to your scolding. "Shhh baby, just take these off," the man lazily orders from his spot on your tummy, just barely lifting his head enough to give you space to pull your shorts off. You wiggle out of them with no help from Logan. He’s much too busy taking in every inch of the scene in front of him, eyes glued to your hands as they reveal your lacy pink underwear barely an inch from his face.
He could drool with how bad he needs to taste you.
You don't even get your shorts all the way off your ankle before he's pinning your hips down and raking your pretty pink panties to the side, latching his mouth over your mound and licking a thick firm stripe from the bottom of your slit all the way through to the tip of your clit. You gasp and grab at his shoulders, a slow “fuuuuck,” falling from your lips as he slowly tastes you.
He’s completely enamored by you, your smell, your taste, the way your look, the way each muscle in your thighs flexes with just the one lick. You look so fucking good like this it makes him angry.
"So fucking pretty," he spits, overwhelmed by his own rush of feelings settling in his stomach. He opts to ignore it by digging his face into you pussy, using his tongue to tease your clit slowly in circles before sliding over your glistening hole, savoring the way your slick tastes on his lips and tongue as he teases your entrance.
"Shit-" it comes out desperate and whiny from your lips as you roll your hips into his face, his nose clipping your clit as he explores your slit. The sensation makes your heels dig into the bed and your eyes flutter back with a gasp, your hands pulling on strands of the man's hair. He teases you like this, switching between circling your clit and pushing softly through your slit till you've thoroughly soaked his face with a mixture of his spit and your slick.
He raises his head with a feral growl, looking as if he's pulling away from his feast as he spits on your clit and spreads it around with his fingers. He chuckles while you squirm, kissing your thigh where his pink bite mark stains it.
"You ready, princess?" He asks, the nickname makes you shiver. You ignore his question and the implications of it, more focused on desperately trying to roll your pinned hips into his mouth, huffing with defeat as neither his hands nor your hips budge. He chuckles at your little tantrum, sitting up and peeling your damp panties away from your core. A soft kiss is delivered to your ankle before settling back into position between your legs.
A chuckle and a shake of his head is all the warning you get before hes sealing his mouth around your clit and sucking, swirling and swiping his tongue around the bud while pinning you in place. It's different.
This time he's got the whole bud suctioned into his mouth, lips and tongue and pressured sucks all swirling it in an abusing pattern. The only sound heard in the room is his wet mouth on you, any attempts at making sound robbed from you as he lathes his filthy attack on you.
You gasp and squirm to no avail, his name dying on your tongue when you manage to catch a gulp of air, your head thrown back in a silent plea. His pace doesn't falter, he doesn't unstick himself from your clit for even a moment, doesn't switch between his tongue or fingers or where he uses them, just one consistent attack as he focuses every ounce of his attention on pleasuring you. it's precise, masterful, dare you say practiced even, in the way has drawing you up. You'd have half the mind to call him a name, call him some sort of whore for knowing the ins and outs of a woman's body so meticulously. Unfortunately for you, your mind is blank as he pulls away to swap his hold on you, instead using one arm to hold you across the stomach while his other ventures down to your opening.
"Logan!" You gasp as he pulls off of you for the first time in what feels like ages, giving you a second to breathe and relax. Well, not relax per say, as Logan is underneath you giggling and gently caressing you from bottom to top.
"Gotta make sure it's all wet baby," he slurs, already pussydrunk as he spits onto your slit and rubs it all over. At this point you were dripping, probably all the way down your seam and onto to the bed if you had to guess, especially you combined with Logans sloppy mouth. The action was redundant, yet filthy none the less, and disgustingly sexy. You fall onto your back and cover your face, groaning and rolling your hips again as you catch your breath,
"You're driving me fucking crazy, Logan," you whimper into the pillow. He’s laughing at you again, kissing just above your clit as he peeps out a tender, "I know baby." He uses his firm hands to massage your thighs, your hips, even using his knuckles down your arms until you've relaxed deep into the bed.
One last kiss is placed onto your thigh before he latches his mouth back over your slit, groaning and relaxing into you like he just took a big draw from a fresh cigar.
He had played you like a damn fiddle, his little break had your muscles relaxing and allowed some air back into your lungs, and now suddenly every movement feels 10x better.
You're hyper aware of every touch, the way his tongue circles your nub before roughly grinding down out it, milking moans from your lips with expertise. He hadn't even brought his fingers back down to your opening yet, still bare and leaking from moments ago when he left you high and dry, yet you were already past the point of no return. Your stomach was tightening, your hands desperately grabbing whatever they could find before deciding on hiding your face in the pillow, successfully concealing your moans and savoring your dignity.
Logan pulled away from your core with a pop, looking to see what had caused the noises he was savoring so sincerely to suddenly stop. He was not happy to see your face covered, not only blocking those pretty sounds but covering your orgasmic expressions too.
“Uh-uh princess. Need to hear it all, and I wanna see those pretty eyes too,” He pleads, big hands coming up to pull your hands to the side and away from the pillows. He places both your wrists on your stomach, his one hand big enough to pin them both with little issue.
He grumbles something about interruptin’ me as he dives back into your core. You can practically see his ears perk back up as he hears your beautiful noises again, his tongue going straight back to its mind-numbing circles. He finally gives you mercy and brings his free hand down, two thick fingers running up and down your slit, making sure they're thoroughly soaked in slick before he's pressing them in. The ridges of his thick fingers massage your walls as they're gently worked in and out in slow strokes, the sound and feeling of Logans mouth and hands combined serving to be absolutely pornographic, and your desperate moans doing little to help.
“Logan~” you gasp in delight as the pairing of the two sensations start to settle back into your core, every sensation elevated 20-fold. He’s so unrelenting with the motions of it all, hooking his fingers and pushing them up until it feels like he's stimulating your clit from both sides. You could practically see stars, languid moans turning into breathless gasps again, your hands flexing and twitching against their spot against your stomach, desperate to grab onto him or his hair or the sheets or anything.
A filthy, “mph- hah! Just a- little more Logan!” eeks past your tense throat, your whole body overwhelmed with the feeling of him taking over every one of your senses.
“Come on princess, wanna see you cum for me,” He growls. it's so deep and attractive, and when he halts the stimulation to your clit to speak, he makes up for it by absolutely slamming his fingers into the soft spot on the roof of your pussy. You were lost, mind completely succumb to him, completely lost in the pleasure his giving you.
“Getting so tight around my fingers, baby. Just let it wash over you, don't think ‘bout nothing but how good im makin' you feel.” He moans breathlessly, having no clue what his words are doing to you. It's all too much, and before you realize it there's a familiar burn in your core, the sounds of his fingers getting louder and sloppier as more of your slick coats his fingers in an all too familiar feeling. You try to alert the man between your legs, try to tell him if he keeps fucking doing that with his fingers you're going to fucking ruin his sheets, but your pleas only serve to fuel him.
Your gasps and calls of his name do nothing to slow his motions, his biceps rippling as he doubles his efforts,
“Lo- fuck- im-!” your pleas come out in unintelligible gasps, not enough air in your lungs to beg anymore, the sounds of your arousal getting filthier and filthier. The crest up to your peak has you crying and squeezing Logans sideburns into the inner skin of your thighs, your whole body shaking as he works you to your breaking point, hands pulling and scratching just a little too hard as it all comes crumbling down. All you can hear is sloshing and wet sounds as your vision goes white.
Your orgasm bulldozes you, your throat parched from how hard you're gasping for air, your limbs sore and twitching as his fingers and tongue work you through the aftershocks. It's all gentle touches and deep gasps of air as you slowly let the stars behind your eyes fade.
You let out a long groan as you steadily come to, body paralyzed flat against the mattress, mustering up enough energy to lift your head and look down at the man of the hour. He’s removed himself from you and is sat up on his knees, the sight paired with the biggest shit eating grin you've ever seen spread across his face. His hair is tousled and falling over his forehead, his chin still dripping with evidence of your climax. His chin and his hands. And down his neck. And all over his T-shirt, the white neckline of his tank now completely transparent.
“Shit-” is all you can say as you see what's happened, hand coming up to cover your face, apologizing to Logan as you scramble up.
“Fuck, let me get a towel logan I'm sor-” “woah woah woah where do you think you're going?” he interrogates as he lays a hand against your chest, stopping you in your tracks and looking at you softly,
“Your soaked Logan, I- I didn't- should've told you, I need to get a towel,” you scramble from underneath him, legs shaking and sensitive as they carry you to the bathroom. He shakes his head as he follows behind, unable to stop you as you scatter away from him and into the next room, a woman on a mission to scrub the world of the evidence of your debauchery. He watches from the doorway, his arm over his head as he leans against the door frame with a cocky smirk as you frantically grab a towel and dampen a washcloth. You turn to leave, looking up at him with a scowl as he blocks your path.
“Ya know I'm supposed to be the one doing all this, princess?” He teases, face still coated in you and glistening in the light. You bring the damp wash cloth up to his jaw and start whipping him down, at least tackling one part of the cleaning process if he wasn't going to let you pass into the bedroom.
“I’m the one who made the mess, Logan,” you remind him, patting the wetness from his stubble. He chuckles, grabbing the towel from your other hand and halting the hand scrubbing his face with a firm hand around your wrist.
"Yeah, but I made it happen. Wheres my credit, bub?" You watch shamefully as he turns and places the towel over the wet spot on the bed, hanging the damp cloth over the bed frame and looking back at you expectantly. You hang your shoulders lower,
“Logan that's not- we need to change the sheets, and you need new clothes and-” “shhh, just come here and lay down with me princess,” he coos, his naivety and dismissal of your feelings starting to frustrate you.
He approaches you with outstretched arms, coming over to loop them around your shoulders and walk you towards the mattress. You stop short of the bed, turning towards him to continue your arguing before he grabs your face with his palm, gently squeezing your cheeks into a pout and effectively stopping any defiance you had. His other hand wraps around your waist as he leans into your ears and speaks lowly,
“I don't know what kind of nonsense you've got in this pretty head of yours,”
he taps your forehead with his forefinger before placing it in your hair, soaking in your gasp as he gently yanks your head back,
“but you're not leaving until I see that,” he refers to the wet spot causing you grief, “at least one more time.”
He possessively grabs your ass, pulling you firmly against him, your breath taken as he speaks into your ear. His teasing eases your worries, and his hands on you definitely help as well.
“So, I think we forget about the sheets,” you both chuckle, your cheeks flushed as he grabs you and growls.
“And you let me play with this pretty pussy till I figure out exactly how she ticks . Sound good to you, baby?” he asks, pulling back with his eyebrows quirked and lips pulled up into a dangerous leer.
You look small in his arms, the roller coaster of emotions leaving you feeling vulnerable and submissive as you softly shake your head up and down, core heating all the way back up for him.
He smiles and brings you into a tender kiss, hands roaming your body and down your arms, grabbing your wrists and placing your palms on his chest. He praises you with gentle whispers of so beautiful, my girl, need you, as he walks you backwards to sit on the edge of the bed.
The kiss turns more heated with every passing moment, his tongue working any shame out of your mind and replacing it with that beautiful heat of pleasure only he can have given you. He pulls away from you, a string of saliva connecting your lips as he pulls that same lopsided grin you've been slowly falling in love with.
“Think I could make you squirt like that on my dick, princess?” He asks bodely, making you snort as your face gets hot, “um, I don't know usually... it's pretty hard.” He chuckles and runs his hands over your thighs.
“Didn't seem too hard to me,” he teases slyly, making you hide your face in his chest with a giggle. He kisses the crown of your head, muttering a soft, “I'll go get some more towels,” before wandering back into the bathroom, your eyes glued on his somehow still fully clothed from. You flush red again as he walks out with 2 more towels, laying them across the mattress and crawling towards you with a hungry glare. You were in for a long night.
#writing#logan howlett#logan howlet smut#logan howlet x reader#logan wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#smut
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sparkling juice
words: 1.9k
warnings: 18+ only!!!, p in v sex, unprotected sex, virgin!reader, dubcon, drugging/tricking reader into drinking, established relationship, innocent/shy!reader (at least at first wink wink), kinda dark!rafe but really he just wants to bang reader reaaaaal bad
“this is so sweet, rafey.” you coo, your hand held firmly in his.
“anything for you baby.” rafe pulls you along the path, further out into the meadow until you get to a shaded area under a tall tree.
“here is perfect.” rafe says, setting the picnic basket down and draping the large blanket he brought with him.
“thank you.” you tell rafe, pulling him in for a sweet kiss before sitting down.
“i brought all your favorites.” rafe says, taking a spot next to you and opening up the picnic basket.
you let out a little squeak in excitement and seeing all your favorite foods before your brows scrunch together as you point at a bottle. “what's that?”
“that's um… sparkling juice. that's all, baby.” of course, rafe knows that's not all it is, but you don't need to know that yet.
rafe pulls out some food for you to snack on, not hungry himself, happy to watch you nibble on crackers and bite into juicy strawberries.
“wanna try some juice with me baby?”
“mhm, of course rafey.” you watch his large hands as he fills two plastic cups, handing one to you. “drink slow.”
you nod in response before taking a sip, pulling away and sputtering. “ew!”
“oh, baby.” rafe pouts. “do you not like it? im so sorry i thought you would.”
“let me… let me try to drink it again. i think im just not used to the carbonation.” you take another sip, able to control your reaction better. “it's not bad!” rafe can tell you're lying, but he lets out a fake sigh of relief and smiles at you.
“so glad, baby. we can keep drinking while we talk, yeah? tell me about your day.”
rafe knows the easiest way to get you distracted is to have you talk, and so as you describe your day, which leads into your plans for next week, which leads into how much you love rafe, you keep taking sips as rafe refills just your cup.
“i… my head feels kinda fuzzy.” you frown, setting the drink down, realizing your fingers are also slightly numb.
“uh oh.” rafe pouts, drawing his thumb over your cheek. “maybe it's the heat. why don't you lay down?”
“yeah.” you nod, laying back onto the blanket, surprised how plush it is from the soft long grass underneath it. “im-” you let out a sudden giggle. “im like really in love with you, rafey.”
“im really in love with you too, kiddo.” rafe adjusts himself to lay next to you, propped up on his side to keep an eye on your reaction as the alcohol you didn't know you were drinking slowly takes effect. “that's why i planned out this whole picnic for you. and brought you special juice.”
“was there-” you hiccup, words slurring slightly. “anything special in the special juice?”
“hm.” rafe sits up, picking up the now half empty bottle. his eyes widen in fake shock as he reads the label. “oh no baby! i must have grabbed the wrong bottle! i meant to get us sparkling juice but i got us sparkling wine!”
“im… im drunk?” you put together what rafes words mean, mind working slowly.
“im so sorry.” rafe moves to hover over you, cupping your cheek. “will you forgive me?”
“course.” you nod quickly. “was an accident.”
“you're so sweet baby.” rafe brings his lips down on top of yours, kissing you wildly, mouths and tongues a passionate mess.
“should we go get some water to help… get rid of this feeling?” you ask rafe as he shifts to kissing your jaw.
“that's so smart, baby, but i can't drive us home drunk, and you don't have your license.”
you knew how to drive well enough, but in your 20 years of life, never felt the need to actually get your license. your parents drove you around as a kid until you started dating rafe a year ago, and then he drove you around everywhere.
“oh, right.” you nod, letting out a small gasp as rafes kisses move lower, exploring your neck. this is where you usually stop him, pull his head back up to kiss your lips and remind him you want to wait. not necessarily until marriage, but a bit longer, until the time is right.
“we should do something to pass the time, baby. until the alcohol is out of our system.”
“doesn't eating help?” you try to remember what you heard your friends talk about, since you're not a drinker yourself. “we could share the rest of the crackers.”
“i was thinking… we could finally make love.” rafe suggests, pulling back to look in your eyes, watching the way your brain is fighting against the alcohol in your system.
“well, you did take me on this nice picnic…”
“mhm.”
“and we have been dating for over a year now.”
“yes.”
“so… i suppose we could.” you shove down any doubting voices in your head, letting the looseness of your inhibitions guide your actions as you lean forward to kiss rafe again.
“thank you baby.” rafe repeats his words between kisses, his weight shifting to his elbow as his other hand holds your waist, before moving up until it's cupping your breast.
“oh!” you gasp, surprised by how good it feels. rafe smiles, tugging at your dress until the material is below your bra, pushing your breasts up.
“what if someone sees?!” you hiss out. it's not likely someone would come by, but rafe doesn't want to ruin his chance to finally have you.
“okay.” he pulls your dress back up, settling for touching you over the material as he distracts you with soft kisses once again. “ill just push your dress up. that way if anyone comes by you can easily cover yourself up.”
“mhm.” you nod, eyes sliding shut, head fuzzy from the alcohol and now from the pleasure building in your system.
rafe reaches down to pull his cock out of his pants, leaving himself mostly covered as well. he begins to slowly stroke himself, already halfway hard just from the excitement.
“oh!” rafe hadn't even realize your eyes had opened up until your outburst.
“it's okay, baby.” rafe says. he's well aware this is your first time seeing his cock as he waits for you to form a reaction.
“i… i want to feel.” you reach down, cautious hand, still numb at the fingertips as you stroke over rafes length, eyes widening when you realize how hard it truly feels..
“can you… can you not look?” you ask shyly, hand still slowly moving as you speak. “at me.”
“baby, you know i find you beautiful. all of you… but if that's what you want, okay.”
“just… look away for a minute.” you wait for rafes gaze to turn to the meadow, watching the flowers sway in the breeze as he hears you shuffling around on the blanket to take your underwear off.
“okay.” you say.
rafe looks back to you, smile growing as he realizes you're laid back down once again, dress pushed up to your thighs, just enough to hide your privates.
“ill be nice and slow, okay? and you tell me if anything hurts.” rafe moves over you, waiting for you to nod before reaching down with one hand to grab his cock. he keeps your skirt as far down as he can while tucking his dick between your thighs. he moves until he bumps skin, letting out a breath when he realizes you are wet.
he rubs his cock through your folds, watching the way your face twists in pleasure, brows pulling together and mouth dropping open.
you let out a moan when rafe hits what he assumes is your clit. he focuses the head of his cock on it for a moment before sinking lower to your entrance.
rafe manages to keep his word, pushing in slowly. he may have been buttering you up for an entire year just to get in your pants, but now he wants more than just once, you're well and truly his, and he plans on exploring with you until you're transformed from innocent girlfriend into personal slut.
“oh! oh, rafe!” your hands move to grip his shoulders. “that… that feels really good!”
“doesn't hurt at all?” rafe can tell he's stretching you somewhat, but clearly by your rapid shaking of your head no, you're not feeling any pain.
“gonna f-make love to you now then.” he swings his hips back before pushing forward, and soon your moans are filling the meadow, being carried away by the wind as he thrusts into you.
“so, so good, rafey.” you cry out, back arching off the picnic blanket. rafe smiles. your first time, and you're already behaving like this. he's going to turn you into a whore sooner than he thought.
“fu-fudge!” you shout out, making rafe chuckle softly as you use your curse word substitute just like you prefer doing.
“you feel so good round me, baby.” rafe says, bending down to kiss your neck. “love the way you're squeezing me.”
“harder.” you whine out. rafes eyebrows raise, but he doesn't question your demand, pushing his hips faster, slamming into you more. your dress pushed up from all the motion to reveal rafes cock burying itself inside your pussy.
he lets out a moan as you grip onto the blanket, not caring about him being able to see you as you feel a high building inside of you.
“i think im close.” you say.
“cum for me baby. ill cum with you.” rafe says, bringing a hand down to your clit, your moans doubling as he rubs over it with his thumb.
your high hits you suddenly. it takes a perfect thrust from rafe a long with his thumb flicking over your clit and your wall breaks with a scream, hips rising off the checkered fabric as you cum, pussy clenching around rafe as he spills inside of you with a moan of his own.
you both collapse in a heap, faces flushed and chests rising and falling rapidly.
rafe pulls out of you carefully before flopping onto his back.
“that was really good, rafey.” you cuddle into his side, resting your head on his chest.
“thank you for trusting me enough to do that with me, baby.” he presses a kiss to the top of your head.
“of course.” your eyes are on rafes cock, still halfway hard despite just cumming. you reach down, ghosting your fingers along his length before swirling your fingertip over the head then against his slit as rafes hips twitch from the overstimulation.
“do you think we can do that again? and then maybe when we get home? after you're good to drive, of course.” you look up at rafe with what he thought were big, innocent eyes, but he's quickly realizing you've got a different side just below the surface.
-- six months later --
“ugh, rafe!” you groan as he presses buttons on the controller, eyes firmly on the screen.
“promise baby, will be done in five minutes.” he says, barely glancing to you.
you're tired of being ignored as you pull off the only clothing you are wearing, a big t-shirt of rafes to cover yourself. rafe glances over, realizing you're now completely nude as his fingers freeze.
“i want to fuck. if you're not gonna help me, im gonna go help myself.” you shrug.
rafe tosses the controller onto the floor, a proud smile on his face. you've become just who he's always wanted you to be. “of course im gonna help you baby, come get on this dick.”
#i wrote this on my phone so there are probably a lot of mistakes#sorry!#rafe smut#rafe cameron smut#obx smut#outer banks smut#rafe fic#rafe fanfic#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe x you#rafe x y/n#rafe x oc#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x oc#rafe imagine#rafe one shot#rafe blurb#rafe drabble#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron one shot#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron blurb
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Just saw the new popular movie ’’This ends with us’’ and I beg of you to draw from the actual beautiful love story, so pure! So same concept of the love story: Pouge!Rafe has been kicked out by his mom and her abusive boyfriend, Kook!Reader sees him homeless & hiding. Reader does small acts of kindness, which builds up to a romance but they separate for whatever reason (could be because they get discovered, he joins the military, like the movie, or something different). It could also be reversed with Pouge!Reader instead being homeless, you pick! Years go by, Reader meets an abusive partner, she bumps into a now grown up Rafe. Lots of angst, lingering feelings and longing, he sees the signs of abusive and gets protective. But without the movie plots of reader getting pregnant and married) I adore and worship your writing skills, truly have a gift to make you feel all the emotions!! <3333333
INVISIBLE STRING - r.c series (one)
i loooove this request because pogue!rafe so i decided to turn into a mini series (two or three parts). im personally not a fan of it ends with us, but i love your requests bc it's still very different from the original plot.
pairing: pogue!rafe x sweetheart!kook reader. chapter warnings: domestic violence; absent parents; angst; fluff.
Rafe was born rough around the edges.
There was never any sugar-coating about it; with his hair always messy, sun-bleached and salty, and his hands perpetually stained with the grime of whatever job he'd taken up that week, Rafe Cameron had never known peace. He moved like a stray dog that had learned to fend for itself, his eyes always scanning for trouble.
Most people kept their distance, and he liked it that way.
There wasn’t much softness in his life. His mom tried her best, he supposed, but that wasn’t saying much. She had a new boyfriend every few months, and they were all the same — mean, drunk, and looking for a fight. Rafe learned early on that if you couldn’t fight back, you were nothing. So he fought. A lot.
He fought the men who walked into their house at night, stinking of cheap whiskey and cigarettes. He fought the kids at school who called him trash, who mocked the way his clothes never quite fit or how he always seemed a little too hungry. But mostly, he fought himself — every time he looked in the mirror and saw his father’s eyes staring back at him. The man who left and never looked back.
Another piece of shit.
He kept his head down, kept his hands busy, and kept his mouth shut unless he had something to say. He wasn’t nice. Nice got you nowhere; nice got you used, broken, and left behind. He had seen it too many times to believe otherwise. The world wasn’t a kind place, and he wasn’t a kind guy.
Most days, he’d finish work covered in sweat and salt, with just enough money in his pocket to get by. He'd dropped out of school years ago and head to the docks, sit on the edge, and smoke a cigarette while the sun dipped below the horizon.
The only real moment of peace he had.
Rafe took what work he could find — fixing up old fishing boats for the few Kooks who’d dare come down his side of the Cut, pulling shrimp nets in the dead hours of the morning, his back aching and his muscles screaming at such a young age, but at least it was better than being home. If he could call it that.
Home, where his mom was probably passed out again, where the latest loser she'd dragged in might be passed out on the couch or looking for a fight.
He could hear them shouting before he even got to the door. His mom’s voice screaming her throat out, and he could hear something crashing inside — a glass, maybe, or a plate. Then came the matching scream of the new boyfriend, Tony or Tommy or something — they all blurred together after a while. Rafe paused on the porch, his hand hovering over the door handle, debating whether it was worth going in at all.
Inside, she was standing in the middle of the living room, her face flushed, her blonde hair a mess. Tony stood over her, fists clenched, his face red and veins bulging in his neck.
Rafe knew that look.
He’d seen it before — seen it in a dozen men who thought they could push their weight around, thought they could break whatever they wanted.
“What the hell’s going on?”
Tony turned, eyes narrowing. “None of your damn business, boy.”
Rafe took a step forward, his fists balling up instinctively. “If it’s in my house, it’s my business.”
His mom spun around to face him, her eyes wild and desperate. “Just stay out of it, Rafe. You always have to make things worse!”
He felt the sting of her words. He should be used to it by now. “I’m not the one who brought this piece of shit in here.”
That was all it took. Tony lunged at him, shoving him hard against the wall. Rafe felt the air rush out of his lungs as pain flared in his back. “You watch your mouth, punk,” Tony hissed, his face inches from his, his breath a disgusting mix of beer and god knows what.
“Or what?” Rafe shot back. If there was one thing he’d learned, it was how to keep his anger in check — at least most of the time.
Tony’s eyes flicked to his mom, like he was making a point, and she just stood there, watching. He’d lost his faith in her a long time ago but it still blew him away how she never lifted a finger to help him.
“Get out,” she said finally, hand moving to point towards the bust-up wooden door.
“What?” Rafe blinked, caught off guard. He must’ve heard her wrong.
“You heard me. Get out!” She was shouting now, her voice high-pitched and desperate. “I can’t have you here, always stirring things up! You make everything worse!”
It had to be a fucking joke. He was the only one bringing in money to pay the rent, the only one who kept the house clean enough so it wouldn’t look or smell like someone died in there. Paid the hospital bills when they hit her too hard. He did everything, always.
Tony shoved him again, harder this time, toward the open door. “You heard her. Get the hell out.”
Rafe stumbled backward, catching himself before he fell. He looked at his mom, his chest tightening in a way he hadn’t felt since he was a kid. “You’re really gonna choose him over your own son?”
She wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Just go, Rafe. I can’t do this anymore.”
He forced himself to nod. He almost wanted to laugh. “Fine,” he muttered, pushing past Tony and heading for the door. “Don’t call me when he sends you to the hospital again.”
He didn’t look back. He couldn’t. The moment he stepped outside, the wind hit his face like a slap, the kind that made his eyes sting and his heart pound. Things had never gotten to this point before. He would’ve rather taken a beating then get kicked out.
He walked, hands stuffed into his pockets. He didn’t know where he was going, just that he couldn’t go back. Not now. Not ever. He’d die before he begged his mother or Tony to let him in that shithole again. His feet took him along the edge of town, past the marina and the fishing docks, and eventually, he found himself in the wealthy part of town, near Figure 8.
It was ironic, almost funny.
The Kooks lived here, the ones who wouldn’t give him the time of day if they saw him on their streets. And here he was, a beat-up pogue, walking right through their territory, angry and suddenly so damn tired.
He spotted an old, abandoned house, sitting at the end of a street where the mansions stood tall and proud. He had walked by it a few times before and noticed it had been empty for years, the paint peeling off in strips, the windows boarded up, and the grass overgrown. He crossed the street, glancing around to make sure no one was watching, and pushed the broken gate open. The hinges squeaked loudly, proving just how long it had been since someone had been there.
The front door was unlocked; it opened with the slightest push. Inside, it smelled of dust and mold, but it was dry, and it was quiet. It was enough. He made his way to a small room in the back, what must have once been a kitchen. There was an old sofa left behind, covered in a dirty sheet. He pulled the sheet off, threw it in a corner, and sank onto the sofá, finally breathing properly.
He stayed there, staring at the cracked ceiling and the empty walls, wondering how the fuck he was going to get himself out of this one.
For the two next days, he moved carefully, quietly, in and out of the house. He didn’t want anyone to know he was staying there. He wasn’t getting his ass thrown into jail again. He found a way in through the back window, kept to the dimly lighted areas, and avoided the main roads. He didn't have much — a few changes of clothes, some cash from odd jobs, and his dad’s old pocketknife, the only thing he had left of the bastard.
It was on the third day that he saw you.
He was sitting on the front steps, having a cigarette, when he heard the sound of a bike chain clicking. He glanced up, and there you were — riding a yellow bike, hair pulled back, and eyes glued to him as you pedaled down the street.
He stiffened, quickly stubbing out the cigarette, his heart rate picking up. You were one of them, a Kook, from one of the mansions just a block away. He’d seen you before, always biking around town, sometimes with friends, sometimes alone.
He didn’t know you, didn’t even know your name, but he knew the type.
You saw him, too, and slowed your bike. His first thought was to get up and disappear back into the house, but he knew that would look suspicious. So he stayed put, trying to look casual, as if he belonged there.
You stopped a few feet away, still on your stupid bike, one foot on the ground to steady yourself.
“You live here?” You asked, not in a mean way, just curious.
Rafe’s jaw tightened. “Yeah,” he lied, “Why?”
You shrugged, “Just… didn’t think anyone did. Looks pretty empty.”
He tensed, waiting for you to say something like, “I’m going to tell someone,” or worse, to start asking more questions. But instead, you just gave him another curious look, nodded, and biked away.
Weird girl.
The next day, you were back. This time, you had a bag with you. He watched you approach, wary. You stopped in front of the house and took something out of the bag — a sandwich, wrapped in paper, and a bottle of water.
You held them out to him, a gentle smile on your face, “Figured you might be hungry.”
He thought maybe you were just trying to make yourself feel better, some Kook guilt thing, like feeding the stray cat in the alley so you could pat yourself on the back for being such a nice person.
And he hated that. Hated you for even thinking he needed your stupid charity. So he gave you every reason to leave him alone.
When you handed him that sandwich, he barely even looked at you.
He just grabbed it and then turned his back, heading into the house without another word. But the next day, you were there again. And the next.
He started making it obvious he didn’t want you around. He’d grunt when you said hello, roll his eyes when you tried to make small talk.
One time, you offered him an apple, and he snatched it out of your hand without a word, just to see if you’d get annoyed enough to leave. You didn’t. Like some fucking saint.
Instead, you kept coming back, like some sort of annoying, persistent fly he couldn’t swat away. Every time, your smile was a little nicer, your eyes a little more curious.
He didn't get it. Why the hell were you still trying? Didn’t you get it? He didn’t want you here. Didn’t want to talk to you. Didn’t need shit from a Kook.
“What’s your problem?” he muttered one day when you showed up with a bag of groceries.
You blinked, “What do you mean?”
“You keep coming back here like I asked you to. I didn’t. I don’t need your charity.”
You raised an unimpressed eyebrow, still not leaving. “I’m not doing charity. I jut figured you could use a little help.”
He scoffed, turning his back on you again. “I don’t need anything from you, princess.”
You hesitated, then placed the bag on the steps anyway. “Well, it’s here if you do.”
He snorted, rolling his eyes again. “Great. Another pity gift from the rich kid. Thank you so much,” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
You clenched your jaw, but still didn’t leave. He expected you to finally get the hint, but you just shook your head and walked away.
The next day, you there you were. And the day after that. Always bringing something, always with that same annoying, stubborn smile.
By the end of the week, he was done. You rolled up with another bag, and before you could even open your mouth, he let out a loud groan, throwing his head back.
"For fuck’s sake, don’t you have anything better to do than bother me every damn day?”
That was it — you snapped.
Your eyes flared, and you stepped in closer, voice getting louder. "Will you just eat the damn food before I throw it in your face?" You shouted, cheeks going red with frustration.
He blinked, caught off guard. He didn’t expect you to clap back.
You’d been silent and too sweet for his liking. Most Kooks would’ve run back to their fancy houses by now, but you were still standing your ground, fists clenched, breathing heavy. Cute.
He almost laughed. Almost. “What’s your deal? You think you’re some kind of hero bringing food to the poor pogue? You think you're gon' save me or something?”
You glared at him “I’m not trying to save you, jerk! I’m just trying to be a decent human! Maybe you should try it sometime!”
He stared at you, face set in a deadpan, but he felt something— something he hadn’t felt in a while. Respect, maybe? But for some reason, he didn’t tell you to get lost.
Instead, he snatched the bag out of your dainty small hand. “Fine. I’ll eat your stupid food. But don’t think this changes anything,” he muttered.
You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms. “Oh, trust me, I don’t.”
You both stood there in this weird silence for a minute, glaring at each other. Then you shook your head, and smiled like you hadn’t read him to filth ten seconds ago. “See you tomorrow, Rafe.”
What? You knew his name?
He watched as you rode away and he realized he was grinning, just a bit. For the first time in weeks, he didn’t feel completely alone.
And somehow, that pissed him off even more.
Days turned into weeks, and you kept showing up, like a plague.
No matter how much Rafe grumbled, no matter how many times he rolled his eyes or muttered under his breath, you just kept coming back. It was always something small — fruit, a bottle of water, a warm meal in a container. Every time you showed up, you had that same stubborn look in your eyes, like you weren’t going to back down no matter how much he pushed you away.
He hated to admit it, but he started to look forward to your little visits. He hated even more that he noticed things about you. Like how your hair fell in your face when you leaned over to hand him something or how your laugh sounded when he said something sarcastic. He noticed the way you seemed to care, even when he made it clear he didn’t want you to.
One day, you showed up with a duffel bag. Rafe looked at you suspiciously as you parked your bike and slung the bag over your shoulder.
“What now?” he grunted, eyeing the bag like it might bite him.
He could tell you were nervous and that weirded him out even more. Since when could he read your mind?
“I was thinking… maybe you’d want to come to my house. Just to shower and get some real rest. My parents are out of town, and y’know, you could use it.”
He stared at you like you’d grown another head. “You want me to come to your house?”
You nodded, looking a little unsure now, hands tightening around the bag’s strap, “Yeah. Just for a bit. I thought you might like a break from this place.”
He scoffed. “And why the hell would I want to do that? You think I’m gonna be some charity case you can parade around to make yourself feel good?”
You sighed, clearly getting frustrated. “No, Rafe. I just thought… I just thought you might want a hot shower. But if you don’t, that’s fine.”
He usually cleaned himself up near the docks, but the water was freezing during this time of the year. Every time it felt like his balls were going to drop to the floor. So yeah, a hot shower in a big mansion sounded tempting.
Even if he didn’t want to give you that satisfaction.
A hot shower… a real bed, even for a little while. He hadn’t had that in what felt like forever. He looked at you again, trying to figure out if this was some kind of sick twisted plan, but all he saw were those stupid glowing eyes staring him down like he’d be dumb to refuse you.
“Fine,” he muttered, standing up. “But just for a shower. And if you try anything weird, ’m outta there.”
Your nose scrunched up, “As if.”
Your house was everything he expected from a Kook — big, clean, and way too fancy. He felt out of place the moment he stepped through the gigantic door, like he was tracking mud on a white carpet. You led him upstairs, pointing out the bathroom.
“You can use this one. Towels are in the cabinet, and I’ll leave some clothes outside if you want them.”
Rafe grunted in response, still unsure why he was even there. He went into the bathroom and locked the door, leaning against it for a moment. The place smelled like lavender or some other fancy soap he couldn’t name. He turned on the shower, and the hot water poured out instantly, filling the room with steam.
He stripped off his dirty clothes and stepped under the water, hissing as the heat hit his skin. But then he relaxed, letting the water wash away the grime, the salt, the exhaustion he’d been carrying for so long. He stayed under the spray longer than he should have, almost losing track of time.
When he finally got out, he saw the clothes you’d left outside the door — a plain t-shirt and sweatpants, nothing flashy, but clean. He put them on and headed back downstairs, finding you in the kitchen, making coffee.
You looked up when he entered, “Feel better?”
He shrugged. “I guess.”
You handed him a cup of coffee, and he took it reluctantly, still waiting for the catch. But you just sat across from him at the kitchen island, sipping your own cup, not saying anything.
He found himself watching you, noticing the little things again.
The way you tucked your hair behind your ear, the way your fingers tapped against the mug when you were thinking. He hated that he was noticing, hated that he found any of it interesting. He took a sip of the coffee and scowled when it tasted good, because of course it did.
“You do this shit for everyone?” he asked, breaking the silence.
You looked at him, “What do you mean?”
“This.” He gestured around. “Invite random guys to your house, make them coffee, act like you care.”
You laughed, a light sound that made his chest feel weird. “No. Just you.”
He didn’t know what to say to that, so he just looked away, taking another sip of coffee. He didn’t do nice. He wasn’t used to nice. This was weird.
You kept doing these little things for him — small acts of kindness he didn’t ask for and definitely didn’t deserve. You’d leave extra food by the house when you knew he’d be there, sometimes even a blanket or a pillow you said you didn’t need. You’d offer to let him use the house again, and every once in a while, he’d accept, hating how much he craved the simple comfort of a shower or a bed.
And all the while, he stayed the same — gruff, sarcastic, always trying to push you away with his attitude. But you didn’t go. You took his crap and came back.
One night, after a particularly rough day where everything seemed to go wrong, he found himself standing outside your house again. Your parents were out of town again, and he didn’t have anywhere else to go. He hated that he was here, hated that he needed this, but he knocked anyway.
You opened the door, your face lit up with that familiar smile. “Rafe,” you said, voice warm. “Come in.”
He liked the way his name sounded on your lips.
He hesitated, but he did. You led him to the living room, and he noticed a few things this time — the family photos on the walls, a vase of flowers on the table, the soft throw blanket on the couch.
Your home was nothing like his, but it felt… safe.
They sat in silence for a while, and he noticed how you didn’t bother him with questions, didn’t try to fix anything. You just sat there, close but not too close, letting him breathe. He found himself looking at you more, catching the way your lips curled up at the corners, how your eyes seemed to soften whenever they landed on him. He felt something strange, something he hadn’t felt in a long time.
He sat on that big couch, staring at his busted-up hands, trying to ignore the way his heart pounded in his chest. You were just a few feet away, eyes flicking over to him now and then, like you were waiting for him to speak. But he didn’t know what to say.
He felt… uncomfortable. Not because of the place, or you. No, never because of you. But because of this strange feeling that kept crawling up his spine, making him feel restless.
You were sitting on the arm of the chair, legs tucked under you, looking at him with that familiar, gentle expression that made him feel like maybe he wasn’t such a screw-up. He didn’t know what to do with that. You were the kind of girl who should have nothing to do with him. Yet here you were, again and again, showing up, like you didn’t know any better.
He cleared his throat, trying to push back whatever weird tension was building between you. “So… your parents,” he muttered. “They’re out of town a lot?”
You nodded, sighing, “Yeah. They travel for work. I’m used to it.”
“Must be nice,” he said, but his voice came out rougher than what he was going for. He didn’t know how to do gentle and he was still half-convinced you were going to kick him out or tell him you had enough of his crap.
“Sometimes,” you replied, “But it gets lonely, too.”
He wasn’t expecting that. He glanced at you trying to read you. He knew you weren’t looking for sympathy; you were just stating a fact.
He wasn’t sure what made him ask, but he did anyway. “Why do you keep helping me?”
You blinked, caught off guard. “I— I don’t know. I guess… I just see something in you. Something good.”
He scoffed, shaking his head. “There’s nothin' good in me.”
“There is,” you insisted. “I see it. Even if you don’t.”
He felt his chest tighten, and he had to look away. “You’re wrong.”
“Maybe,” you said quietly, “but I don’t think so.”
He feel your eyes on him, could feel the way his pulse was racing under his skin. He hated it. Hated that he wanted to believe you, wanted to feel whatever it was you seemed to see in him.
“You’re too good,” he muttered. “Too good for someone like me.”
You laughed softly. “You don’t know me as well as you think, Rafe.”
He glanced up, surprised by the boldness in you. You were so soft most days it always threw him off when you took the reins. You were closer now, leaning forward just slightly, eyes fixed on his. He felt that breathtaking tension tightening again.
Before he could think better of it, he spoke, voice coming out meeker than what he was going for, “You really think there’s somethin' good in me?”
You nodded, not taking your eyes off of him for a second, “Yeah, I do.”
He swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly dry. He didn’t know what he was doing, didn’t know what possessed him, but before he could stop himself, he reached out, his hand finding yours. You didn’t pull away. Didn’t flinch in fear or scrunched up your nose in disgust.
Instead, your fingers tightened around his, and his breath caught in his throat.
“Why?” he asked again, desperate.
“Because I just do.”
Something snapped in him then, something he’d been holding back for too long. He moved closer, his other hand reaching up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing against your delicate skin. You didn’t pull away again, only leaning into his touch.
He hesitated, just for a moment. “I’m not— I-I’m not a good guy,” he murmured.
You smiled again, softer this time, the way he hoped you only did for him, “I don’t need you to be.”
He didn’t get it, but he didn’t have time to figure it out.
He leaned in and kissed you. It was clumsy at first — just a touch of lips, a bit hesitant. But then you kissed him back and suddenly he understood those stupid cliché novels his mom used to read when he was younger. He’d never kissed anyone before.
He was too aware of how inexperienced they both were, of the way his lips barely brushed against yours. He felt stiff and unsure, like he didn’t know if he was doing it right. But it felt right. It wasn’t smooth or perfect — there was hesitancy and uncertainty, but it was real. He felt your hand touch his cheek, your fingers warm and trembling just a little.
His hand slid from your cheek down to your neck, pulling you closer, fingers curling into your hair. He couldn’t get enough. It was messy, frantic, his heart racing like it was trying to break out of his chest, and for once, he didn’t care. He felt your breath hitch against his lips, the warmth of you pressing into him, and all the walls he’d built up, all the reasons he’d given himself to push you away, disappeared.
Your hands found their way to his chest, fingers gripping the fabric of his old shirt like you didn’t want to let go, and that did something to him. Made him feel more alive than he had in a long time. Every time he kissed you, it was like he was drowning in you, like nothing else mattered except for this — your lips, your skin, the way your body pressed against his.
He pulled away, just for a second, eyes wide and breathing heavy, like he couldn’t believe what had just happened.
He looked at you, cheeks flushed, lips swollen and wet from the kiss, and damn, you looked beautiful. More beautiful than he ever let himself admit before.
But then you smiled, that same heart-shattering smile, and it was like you were pulling him back in, “You don’t have to be afraid,” you whispered.
“I’m not…” he started, but even he didn’t believe it. Because he was. He was terrified as hell of this, of you, of the way you made him feel like he wasn’t a complete mess. But before he could say more, you kissed him again, and this time, he didn’t hold back.
He didn’t think about what he should or shouldn’t be doing, didn’t overanalyze the way his hands moved from your waist to your back, pulling you closer until there wasn’t any space left between you. You melted into him, your body warm and soft, like you belonged there and he felt like he was burning up from the inside out.
His hands roamed, exploring, memorizing the curve of your waist, the way your body fit so perfectly against his. Every little sound you made, every breathless gasp, made him feel like he was on fire.
You broke apart again, both of you panting, and he rested his forehead against yours, eyes closed, trying to catch his breath.
“This is crazy,” he muttered, his voice all shaky.
You giggled, the sound making his chest tighten in the best way.
“Maybe. But I don’t care.”
He opened his eyes, staring into yours, and he knew you meant it.
You didn’t care about the Kook vs. Pogue thing, about the stupid rules that had been drilled into them from birth. You just cared about him. He didn’t know how to let himself want something good, something real. But he wanted you. God, did he want you.
From that night on, everything changed.
You started seeing each other in secret, meeting up when your parents were out of town or sneaking off to some hidden spot by the beach at night where no one would find you. Every time he saw you, it was like a high he couldn’t get enough of. You’d kiss, talk, hold each other like you were the only two people in the world, and he’d forget about all the shit in his life. Forget about the fact that he was supposed to be a screw-up who didn’t deserve someone like you.
You sat side by side at the dock, feet dangling just above the water, the tips of your shoes barely touching the surface. Something was calming about the sound of the gentle waves lapping against the dock, the world feeling small and distant for once, like it was just the two of you.
He leaned back on his hands, staring out at the horizon, not saying much. He’d been quiet today, more so than usual. You nudged him lightly with your shoulder.
“Penny for your thoughts?”
He snorted, shaking his head slightly. “You don’t want ‘em. They’re not worth much.”
You rolled your eyes, nudging him again. “C’mon. You’ve been quiet all day. What’s going on in that head of yours?”
He hesitated, glancing down at the water, his fingers curling into the wood of the dock. He was biting back whatever was eating at him. He wasn’t the type to open up easily, you knew that, but he wanted to, for you. You wanted to know him, all of him, not just the fake exterior he put up for everyone else to see.
“You ever think about… like, how different your life would be if shit didn’t go so sideways?” he asked, his voice low, almost like he wasn’t sure he wanted to say it out loud.
You frowned, turning to face him, “What do you mean?”
He exhaled sharply through his nose, running a hand through his hair.
“My mom, she… she used to date these losers. Real pieces of shit, y’know? Guys who’d roll through, thinking they owned the place, treating me like I was some kind of burden just because I was around.”
It wasn’t easy for him to say it, but he was doing it anyway, like the words had been stuck inside him for years.
“She didn’t really care what they did. As long as they paid for her booze, she was cool with whatever. They’d knock me around sometimes, tell me I wasn’t worth shit. But she never did anything about it.” He paused, swallowing hard, his gaze fixed on the water because he couldn’t look at you. “One of ‘em got real bad. Fucker hit me so hard one night, I thought I was gonna pass out. And when I told her… she didn’t care. Told me I was a liar. Said I probably deserved it.”
“Rafe…” you whispered, reaching out to take his hand. He didn’t pull away this time, just let you hold it, his fingers squeezing yours a little too tightly.
“I tried to stick it out,” he continued, his voice quieter now. “Tried to stay for as long as I could. But one day, she kicked me out. Told me I was too much trouble, and she didn’t need me around anymore.” He laughed, but it was hollow, bitter. “I guess I wasn’t worth the space I took up.”
You were quiet. He liked that about you, that you didn’t try and get his thoughts out of his head, just let him do his thing, on his own time. There was nothing that could make up for the kind of pain he’d been through. You just squeezed his hand tighter, and he just knew you wished you could take some weight off his shoulders.
“That’s why you were in that house?” You brushed your lips against his shoulder.
“Yeah.”
It was hard for him to talk about this stuff. Hell, it was hard for him to talk at all when it came to anything real. You just sat there, holding his hand, being there. That was what made you different. Most people didn’t wait for him. They’d get frustrated, give up, move on.
You just... stayed. And that scared him almost as much as it comforted him.
“You didn’t deserve that.”
He scoffed, shaking his head. “Doesn’t matter. Deserve’s got nothin’ to do with it.”
You shifted closer, your knees touching his now. “It matters to me.”
He didn’t understand how you could look at him like that, like he was worth something.
“You knew my name.”
You nodded, “You delivered fresh seafood to the house once.”
His eyes nearly popped out from their sockets, “I was fourteen.”
“Yeah?”
“And you remembered that?”
Your brows shot up like he’d said the dumbest thing ever. “Obviously.”
His breath caught, and before he could stop himself, he reached out, pulling you into his lap. His hands found your waist, desperate, almost frantic, holding onto you like you were the only thing keeping him grounded.
"You shouldn’t—" he started, but the words died on his lips because you were already kissing him, and it was like everything stopped. The world, his thoughts, all the shit that weighed him down. It was just you, your lips, the way your hands tangled in his hair, and the soft sounds you made against his mouth.
He kissed you harder, more urgently, like he was trying to prove something to himself — that he could have this, that he could deserve this. His hands slid up your back, pulling you closer until there was no space left between you. His lips moved against yours and he felt like he was falling apart and putting himself back together all at once.
When he pulled back, just enough to look at you, his chest was heaving, and you were looking at him with that same softness that made his stomach twist.
"How—How the hell did I get this lucky?" His voice cracked, just a little. He hadn’t meant to say it, but the words spilled out anyway.
You smiled, brushing your thumb across his cheek, and he realized then that his face was wet. He hadn’t even noticed the tears slipping down, hadn’t noticed the way he was trembling.
"You deserve this" you whispered.
That was it.
That was the breaking point. A choked sob escaped him, and before he could stop himself, he crashed his lips against yours again, kissing you so hard it hurt, but he didn’t care. He couldn’t get enough of you, couldn’t hold back the way he felt like he’d been waiting his whole life for this moment. For you.
His hands cupped your face, fingers trembling as he kissed you again and again, like he was afraid you’d disappear if he stopped.
And as his tears mixed with your kiss, he realized that for the first time in his life, he wasn’t running.
He wasn’t pushing you away. He was falling, hard and fast, and he didn’t care. Because for once, he was exactly where he wanted to be.
#requested#rafe cameron#rafe#pogue!rafe#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x reader#rafe fic#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron au#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron angst#rafe outer banks#rafe cameron obx#rafe cameron imagine#rafe obx#rafe imagine#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe x kook!reader#pogue!rafe x kook!reader#sweetheart!reader#rafe fluff
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denji’s prized possession!!
nsfw, minors dni.
a/n: thinking about how cute and submissive denji would be!! always ready to get a taste of his prized possession. this man will get on his knees anywhere, everywhere, always, no matter what.🧡
warning: exploiting, cunnilingus, dry humping, fingering, denji cums on your stomach and licks it off, also rubs his cum on your pussy, panty stealing.
“babyyy..~” denji whispered into your ear.
“no, go to bed denji.” you said trying to free yourself from his hold.
you two were at his apartment. you were too tired to walk back home, afterall the mission you both got sent over too had taken almost the whole day. you decided to stay with denji, praying all he would do was cuddle and go to bed.
“pleasee. can’t wait til mornin’ pretty.” he was whining in your ear. so annoying, but cute. you thought.
denji had been begging you for almost 20 minutes to let him eat you out. you, of course being too tired, kept denying his request. you didnt wanna go through the trouble of getting up and taking your clothes off and all of that.
“denji, im too tired baby. i cant even get up im so sore. i promise tomorrow, when i can actually get up.” you said, attempting to turn around so you wouldn’t have to little spoon anymore.
“so if i did it while you were asleep you wouldn’t mind?” denji said while kissing your shoulder.
“mmm nope. its better than doing all the work, i would be fine with it.” you laughed jokingly, knowing he would do it, but it never crossed your mind he would, right now, today, tonight.
denji didnt say anymore, so you took it as an invitation to let your eyes rest and get some long, well deserved, sleep.
denji’s pov!
sooo hungry. i cant wait til tomorrow mornin’.
he freed his hold on you waist and slid down the bed, onto the ground, pulling you by your legs to get closer, earning a grunt from you.
he didnt think much of this. he knew you were a deep sleeper, so he had no fear moving you as he pleased.
he tilted your body to the right and raised your legs up, spreading just enough.
he stopped.
would you be okay with this? is this rape? surely not. i hope not, itll be ok. something about this excited him, he knew you would never be really upset with him. it turned him on, seeing you when your the most vulnerable, taking advantage of your body.
he smiled to himself knowing everything was probably okay.
he pulled down your shorts. leaving your underwear on.
he stuffed his face in your cunt, deeply inhaling your smell. he licked your clit through the fabric.
he unconsciously began to rub against the foundation of the mattress. he tried to find the position where he could get the most friction in his sweatpants.
denji grabbed your panties and pulled them up, watching them go up your almost soaked cunt, sinking into the lips of your pussy.
he buried his face once again in your pussy, lapping up all your juices eating you like a hungry dog.
he pulled your panties off, getting a better view of your pussy, sinking in a finger inside your tight hole.
he curved his finger up and down inside taking his time feeling around and exploring your gummy walls, he pulled out and licked it off clean. moaning at the taste.
he pushed his finger back in while flicking his tongue on your clit, occasionally sucking it and rubbing it with his free hand.
at this point denji’s face was a mess covered in your juices. he was a moaning mess, his pants earning a wet spot the more the rubbed against the base of the bed, he had came atleast twice.
he stuck his hand down his pants wetting his fingers with his own slick, taking it up and spreading it inside your pussy, as lube. but also because he found it hot to taste himself on your pretty pussy <3
denji lost track of time, your body had came around 3 times now, he knew if he kept going your body would eventually squirt “or somethin’ ” (his words) and you would wake up.
he found it exciting not wanting to be caught. it turned him on.
he decided to finish himself off by hovering over you relieving himself all over your tummy.
as he finished getting every last drop out his red puffy tip, he licked it off your stomach, licking it clean.
he picked up your shorts and put them back on, but leaving your panties bunched up inside his pockets.
he layed back down in the same position he was in about an hour ago, and took your panties out his pocket.
he spun them around and the air before sniffing them again.
he put them infront of you.
“see that y/n? i wonder who these belong to ♡” he giggled, “they’re my prized possession, along with your pretty soaking pink pussy.”
im soooo sorry if this was something weird to write!!:(
ive personally imagined myself in this scenario amd would fimd it super hot if my partner did this, but thats me.
#smut#denji x reader#denji smut#smut fic#csm denji#csm smut#denji hayakawa#denji x you#csm#chainsaw man smut#csm dennis#fyp#tumblr fyp#mikgreo writes
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hi! i’d love a spencer bath/shower comfort fic
pebble proposal | Spencer reid
summary; when sick and sore, Spencer is there to wash away all your pain.
warnings; bathing together, not in a sexual way, talks of proposals but at the very end; mentions being sick, no specific gender mentioned but he does wash your hair and it kinda references longer hair.?? This is just a really really comforting fic tbh its all sweet and fluffy
an/ There wasn’t much detail in this request so i hope i did it justice, but if not feel free to let me know and request again in more detail of what you want so i can get it as close to perfect for you as possible!!
your body ached as you walked up the stairs of your apartment complex, you could feel your muscles tightening with every painful step you took. You felt like your knees were going to give out on you any moment.
Your hands fumbled with your keys, trying to find the one to your apartment as you approached the door. You felt your head throb as the jingle of the keys clashing together ran through your ears.
Work sucked — there was no better way to put it. Everything was going wrong, papers were put in the wrong spot, things were going missing, you found yourself running around all day trying to fix things and clean up after your coworkers — all while sick.
You knew you were getting sick as much as you tried to ignore it, you were coughing and blowing your nose every five minutes — the headache that didn’t go away no matter how many pain meds you took wasn’t helpful either.
All you wanted to do was curl up in one of Spencer’s hoodies and lay in bed for the entirety of the weekend
The minute the door closed behind you as you stepped into the apartment, your back was pressed against it. Your eyes closed tightly as a heavy sigh left your mouth, melting into the warmth of your home.
“Angel?” Your eyes snapped open to see Spencer staring at you, concern lacing his features. Your lips parted slightly — you didn’t know he would be home, as far as you were concerned he was supposed to be away on a case for the next few days.
“Hi” You murmured tiredly as you dropped your bag to the floor. You wanted nothing more than to walk over and bury yourself in his grasp — but even just the idea of walking just a couple of steps made the ache more.
He opened his mouth to talk before he was cut off by you bursting into a coughing fit, instantly bringing your arms up to cough into the elbow. He frowned.
“Are you sick honey?” He asked, taking a few steps towards you once your coughing relaxed. You sighed again, nodding.
“Why are you home” You asked as he wrapped his arms around your body, you instantly sunk into his embrace, his hand slipping under your shirt to rub your back gently. “Easy case, we got done early” He said softly.
“Im gonna get you sick” You muttered into his shirt, making him hum. You knew about his hypersensitivity to germs. He didn’t say anything or pull away from you, he stayed right in place, holding you comfortably against him.
“Are you hungry?” He asked, you shook your head. The idea of eating right now made you feel nauseous. “I don’t t think I can move” You said. Everything about your tone showed how exhausted you were — not just physically.
“Sore baby?” He cooed slightly, pulling away from the hug to get a look at your face. You nodded as a frown adorned your lips.
“How about I run you a nice warm bath yeah? The steam will help you feel better and the hot water will help your muscles relax” He said, hand falling out of your shirt, making you instantly miss the warmth it provided.
You agreed, letting him wrap his arms around your waist to pick you up — normally you would argue and tell him to put you down, but you couldn’t fine the energy to, one ; argue. Two; walk if he wasn’t carrying you.
He placed you on the bathroom counter, letting you press your back against the wall as he ran the bath, he ran his hand under the water checking the temperature before adjusting it slightly and letting it run.
He lit a few candles, each a basic simple scent that was easy on the senses, as well as setting up the diffuser, you watched him grab the peppermint drops, making you shake your head. “I dont want peppermint” You muttered.
“Yeah? Peppermint helps reducing coughs and throat infections so it might help you feel better” He said softly, not really pressuring you to use it — moreso encouraging you with factual information.
“What does lavender do?” You asked. He chuckled, grabbing the lavender essentials oil out. “Well, lavender could also be good. It helps relieve stress and fatigue, can help with headaches, eucalyptus is good too” He said softly, hand placed on your knee.
“We don’t have eucalyptus” You murmured, he nodded, “We don’t” He confirmed, looking over the essential oils the two of you had. you remembered you had used it all when Spencer was last sick, he was picky about which essential oils he wanted.
“Lavender or peppermint?” He asked, now knowing the information of what each did, you half smiled. “Lavender” Your answer didn’t change.
He chuckled as he continued setting up the bath after dropping the oils into the diffuser. After that while waiting for the bath to finish filling up — Spencer stood between your legs, arms wrapped around your waist, just hugging you.
It was nice.
You were half asleep when he turned off the tap, helping you down from the counter and helping you undress — you instantly sighed as you felt the warm water over your body.
You could see the steam from the condensation it left on the bathroom mirror. Spencer didn’t leave the bathroom as his hands rested softly on your shoulders as you sat up in the bath.
“That okay?” He asked, you did nothing more than nod, letting the warm water rush away the tightness in your body as you let out a soft sigh of content.
“Can you come in with me?” You asked, lifting your head to look up at him, he was standing behind you. His eyebrows clocked softly before he nodded — how could he say no.
He undressed himself before sinking in the bath behind you, his legs on either side of you as you rested between his legs — he was glad the apartment had a large bath.
Your back was resting against his chest as your head fell onto his shoulder, closing your eyes. He smiled softly to himself as he lifted his arm behind him to grab the body wash and your loofah.
You hardly noticed what he was doing as you laid, just appreciating the comfort of his body against yours and the warm water until you felt the slight cold pressed against your shoulders as he began running the loofah over your skin.
His pressure was so gently as he began washing your body, “Sit up a bit angel” He muttered quietly, you did so without question. Letting his hand gently lead the loofah over your back, arms and shoulders before it wrapped around your body gently, rubbing over your collarbones gently, then over your chest with nothing but sweetness in his touch.
“I missed you” You said quietly.
He smiled — you couldn’t see it but you could hear it in his tone. “I missed you too, so much” He said. He grabbed the small plastic cup the two of you kept on the side of the bath, filling it with water before gently pouring it over your shoulders and back — washing away the soap.
Once the soap had been washed away. His hands reached out for the shampoo. “Spence?” You said softly, making him turn his head to find you looking at him with tired eyes, making his head ache in his chest — wanting nothing more than to take away all the bad in your life and keep it for himself, he would be fine with it all as long as he had you.
“Yeah angel?” He said softly, squeezing shampoo into his hands gently, before making a ‘come here’ motive with his finger, which you obliged to, turning your head back around as you shuffled backwards slightly closer to him.
“Can you talk” You asked.
He hummed, “About what baby?“ He asked as his hands began massaging the shampoo into your scalp gently. you shrugged as your head subconsciously leaned back into his touch. “Anything— I just wanna listen to you talk.” You said.
He smiled fondly, he continued massaging the shampoo into your hair. “When an adelie and gentoo male penguin falls in love with a female” He started softly, grabbing the cup filling it with water as he tapped the top of your head softly, encouraging you to lean your head back, which you did.
“He will search the entire land to find the smoothest rock he possible can” He tipped the water gently over your hair, hand pressed against your forehead lightly to stop water from getting into your eyes.
He refilled the cup and poured it over the ends of your hair — making sure the shampoo was completely washed out. “And he will give it to her as a proposal. Its called a pebble proposal” He said softly.
“Really?” You cooed softly.
“Really” He nodded, His hand left your hair briefly as he filled it with conditioner, before working it through your scalp and ends of your hair. “and If the female approves of the rock, they will began their pebble collection — which they call a pebble mound, in preparation for their eggs” He said.
He washed out the conditioner from your hair softly, before wrapping his arms around your waist, pulling you gently to his chest. “Well If you ever propose, i expect a perfectly smooth pebble” You joked softly, your eyes closing as your head returned to its original place on his shoulder.
He chuckled as he turned his head pressing a soft kiss to the side of yours. “When I propose”
You hummed in confusion, “Hm?”
“You said If i propose, as if theres a chance of it not happening.” He said gently into your ear, “When I propose; you will get a perfectly smooth pebble and a perfect ring.” He muttered, finger tip drawing lines up and down your stomach gently, sending light ripples through the water.
You smiled. “Okay, When you propose”
#criminal minds#criminal minds show#criminal minds x reader#criminalmindsfans#spencer criminal minds#spencer reid#spencer reid x oc#spencer reid x reader#wattpad#criminal minds one shot
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SO UHH HI MUNCHIES..THIS IS MY FIRST SMUT SO IM KINDA BLUE BALLING IT, but I’ve read so much smut I think I can do it. You can criticize since I always want to be better! Also this is in 2 person pov also it stirred away from the movie,(he just keeps working shifts that’s ir)
My atties @ilovetoomanymen @valez123
Some basic stuff - body worship, cunnilingus, loser mike/hj, Mike is a whimper confirmed, afab reader
“I’m sorry I don’t have the money, could I pay for it in a….different way.”
You were a babysitter for Abby, you understood how hard it was for her brother, and you loved the little girl to bits. She was shy and such a creative girl, and she loved you to for being so patience with her and just generally caring for her. So that’s why you were ok with getting payed very little.You always asked if you could help Michael with anything else, but he would always say no. You respected his wishes mostly, leavening a 20 around the house if Abby needed or wanted something.
You had a good job so you were taken care of, you always made sure they were ok, even if Michael told you they were. You knew it was hard for him. How couldn’t it be? He was a guy just barely scraping by while taking care of his sisters, and now’s he’s having to take night shifts, being away from Abby so long and not getting good sleep, so when he asked you to watch Abby at night while he was at work, you didn’t mind when he was working so hard, and it just ment that your job was easier.
This was about the 2 week into his night shift job, you were asleep on the couch, soon you heard a jingle of keys and the door quietly opening and shutting. You groggily looked up checking the time, it was around 3:26 am.“Mike..?what are you doing here..it’s only 3”, you tiredly say wiping your eyes, slowly pushing yourself to sit up.”Oh. One of the animatronics were malfunctioning and kept messing with the power, so I decided to come home,and I was a little hungry anyways.” He says as he shuffles his vest off, putting it on the table. You slowly get up still a bit tired. Walking to get your bag that he put his vest by. Slowly packing up you heard him pipe up.
“Hey uhm, listen.. it’s been getting harder so-“ you swiftly cut him off, ”Listen I understand, you don’t have to pay me, I know you work hard to provide.“ He looked at you with wide eyes, “and mike you don’t have to do any-“, “I never said I wasn’t gonna do something.”, he said while looking at you. “W-what?” You looked back at him bewildered. What did he just say? He took a couple steps in front of you, sinking to his knees In front of you, grabbing your hips and pulling you closer, he slowly looks up at you, “I’m sorry I don’t have the money, could I pay for it in a….different way.”, he asked, he sounded desperate almost pleading with you. And how could you say no, he was on his knees begging to have you, you wanted him.
You quickly nod, brain not nearly processing what’s happening as fast as it needs to. Just as he was about to start taking off your pants, you quickly stated,”I’m pretty sure we shouldn’t be doing this in the kitchen”, “Oh- yeah, that would be a bad idea.”, he got up, grabbing your hand and walking to his bedroom quickly, the moment both of you get in his room, he slams his lips against yours, you felt like you were dreaming, and you didn’t wanna stop, every kiss he stole from you felt like you were on cloud 9.
“Mike..we have to keep it down, Abby’s in bed”, you said in between kisses.”I know, I know.” He quickly locks the door, ushering back to you, as you guys fumble on the bed, you felt hot, like fire was spread through out your body,in a blink of a eye he was already removing your shirt and bra. After he got done you whent to take his shirt off, “nuh uh. This is my payment to you.”,he says. As he gets to his knees in front of you. God the way he looks at you from between your legs, looking so focused in between while shuffling you pants down. And he was finally down to the last article of clothing, he both wanted to savor and devour you at the same time, and he decided to pick the latter.
He slowly slipped the last piece of clothing. You thought he was gonna take it slow, well. No, he roughly grabs your hips shoving his face in for his meal, he ate, he ate like a mad, taking long fast drags from his tongue against you cunt,”oh god..mike~”. Flicking your clit when the tip of his tongue gets to it, he couldn’t get enough of you,”more,please more” he whimpers out in between your legs. Your mind was fuzzy and you could barely think, all you could really think about is mike and his godly skill with his tongue.
He groans out in satisfaction. He kept licking, drenching your pussy In his saliva, god he was so messy, “g-god so good” he groaned, he was so messy, saliva and slick drenching his face, and you loved it, you had to bite down on your hand to keep quite soon though he wanted more,he needed more as he slowly got rougher, soon he was stuffing your cunty with his fingers while he suckles on your clit, he ramens two fingers into not relenting on, soon you can feel the coiling in your stomach, you grab his hair roughly, tugging to let him know your were close.
Soon the coiling in your stomach snapped, mike slowly guided you through it, you breathed out a breath you didn’t know you kept in, Mike lapped at the juices on his fingers,soon you felt overwhelmed. As mike started to kitten lick your Pussy not seeming to stop.”mike no,no more”, you breathed out, “please one more just one more right, you can do it right? please just one more, I want more no, I need it please god just one more.” He whimpered out pleading, pleading and begging, you nod. He kept licking, starting to get rougher with the licks soon it was all to much for you again. And soon you were cumming on his tongue once again.
Mike slowly got up, knees slightly wobbling from being on the ground, he slowly wiped the back of his hand against his mouth,”I uh..did you like it?”, “mike if I ever hear those words come out of your mouth again, after you gave me the best head in my life.”, he chuckles embarrassingly “well let’s get you cleaned up.”
———
“So are we gonna discuss what happened last night?”, “what do you mean Abby” mike stated confused, “you weren’t very slick last night so, when am I gonna be a auntie?” Mike started back at her stunned,” ABBY W-WE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT” mike rushed our embarrassingly, “geez are you gonna answer the question or not?”
———
THANK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH FOR READING THIS, THIS TOOK LIKE HOURS CAUSE I HAD LIKE SPURTS OF MOTAVATION, SHOUT OUT TO THE PEOPLE WHO WANTED THIS ONE AND HAVE A LOVELY DAY<33
#mike schmidt smut#mike schmidt x reader#mike schmidt#fnaf smut#five nights at freddy's#fnaf movie#josh hutcherson#x reader#smut#mike schmidt x reader smut#mike schmidt x you
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𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐬 || 𝐂𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
part one: here || part two: money power glory
Summary_when Coriolanus promised to split the plinth prize with his best friend, he didn’t knew that would be enough reason for Dr. Gaul to transform you into an experiment.
Warnings_bff to enemies, asshole Coryo, violence, mutations, angst, fluff.
Note_ im back to my coriolanus shit, and nothing just listen to valley of the dolls and girl
♪ ♫ Coryo playlist ✰ Index (+ fics here)
_________________________________________
It was a dry fall day when Coriolanus and his family ran out of cabbage and potatoes. He was to go to Pluribus Bell and trade some belongings for food. He was a kid, and he had been struggling for a very long time now. The Capitol was slowly making its way back to what it was before the war, but it was taking longer than expected.
Tigris was out, trying to trade some of the gold earrings from Grandma’am for wood, for the upcoming winter.
At the rough age of twelve, Coriolanus Snow had been growing impatient to get older, get into University, and give his family a better life. He already knew how to disguise his lack of wealth and how to fit in with his classmates. Coriolanus had no friends, just people to blend in.
He carefully closed the door from Pluribus’ place when someone opened the door from inside, pulling him backward, and making him trip.
“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry- Coriolanus Snow?” He heard a soft female voice and when he stood up, he finally saw you.
“Y/n?…” He grew worried, wondering if any other classmates were around, hoping to be wrong, as he didn’t want to be seen.
“Hi…” you awkwardly said.
Coriolanus was indifferent to you. He disliked how he often heard you gossiping with your friends. He disliked how you always participated in debates and readings, finding it annoying. And most important, he knew you were born capitol but your family was once District 1 generations ago. You were no daughter of elite members.
“What are you doing here?” The boy asked.
You weren’t expecting to see him there. Pluribus’ customers were always… poor people, hungry. So when you saw the brown bag with two cabbages and some potatoes in Coriolanus’ bag, you didn’t even need to question.
“I come here to trade my mother’s designs for food.” Coriolanus never thought you were in a situation similar to him.
“My father served in the war, he got injured and couldn’t keep working, and my mother quit her job to take care of him. We don’t have much but we are surviving…” you added shamelessly, Coriolanus was jealous that you weren’t afraid of revealing the truth, something he couldn’t.
“I won’t tell anyone I saw you here, Coriolanus. If that’s what you want” you added after seeing him judging you quietly, giving a cold look. You had the idea of him being serious and a young man of few words, no doubt he was.
“Can I trust you?” He asked, thinking he sounded so dumb.
“I have no reason to spread details of your life. So yes, you can trust me…”
“Okay…”
“I live on the Corso…” you said and without thinking, Coriolanus smiled more than he should have.
“Me too!” His excited tone made you feel relieved.
“Can you imagine both of us living in the same place?” You asked cheerfully. Coriolanus doubted it.
“I don’t think so…”
Oh but how mistaken was he? Not only do you two live on the Corso, but you also live in the same building. He had the penthouse and your parents owned the floor below.
Coriolanus was taken aback by how calm and excited you were as you showed him your house.
The boy learned quickly that your family was doing better than his. You had a lot of things, your room had exotic wallpapers, and a lamp made of feathers was even affordable.
For the first time, Coriolanus felt like he could actually enjoy meeting someone new. Even better if it was in his safe space, his home, and the source of his identity.
And that’s how you turned out to be the only person Coriolanus allowed to know about his situation.
…
Exactly five years later, Coriolanus was coming back from the market where he had traded a watch for some black dressing pants. Even though the Plinth Prize had been only announced two days ago, Coriolanus was already thinking about clothing for the occasion. He was out of breath by the time he hit your floor. And he was not going to stop by your place but he grew curious when he saw you tending a big piece of dark grey crinkled fabric. You had your long hair curled up, wearing slippers, a nightgown, and a robe.
He smiled, wondering how important could that fabric be to not acknowledge him.
“What you got there?” You quickly looked up, slightly embarrassed that Coriolanus caught you in your pajamas.
“I know it’s early, but my mom and I had an idea for a set. In case you know-“ you feel like you sound very narcissistic, hinting that you could possibly win the Plinth prize. Coriolanus and you were exceptional in school. And the only “friends” you could count were Clemensia, Festus, and Sejanus, although they were slightly behind you and the blonde.
“I had the same idea,” Coriolanus said, walking closer, showing you the black pants in his arm.
You smile at him, feeling reassured that you both thought the same. You knew the young man judged you once. But now, he had no reason to. Or so you believed.
He was very close to turning eighteen in the first months of the approaching year, you had also thought about buying him a present.
“Come inside. I need to tell you something…” he nodded, but gulped, thinking the worst.
You shut the door and Coriolanus noticed it smelled sweet.
“Oh, I’m baking something… I would like to share it with you and your family” The boy blushed at you noticing how hungry he was and also because it was very kind of you to share given the circumstances.
“You don’t have to, y/n”
“But I want to.…” he rolled his eyes, chuckling, tenderly accepting your good intentions.
“I don’t have anything to give you back. But we made a promise. Remember?” You nod, smiling softly at him.
Coriolanus is your best friend. Although Clemensia, Festus, and even Arachne were close friends, no one compared to Coryo.
“I do, but…”
“No, y/n. No matter what, we are splitting the prize. Both of us are going to university together.” He seriously said.
In the most inconvenient way, Coriolanus had found an ally. He knew most of his classmates since he was a little child, but after getting to know you, he understood it wasn’t the same. He was grateful for having you.
“That’s why I wanted to talk to you. Sit…” Coriolanus walked towards your kitchen table. He realized your parents were gone. Which made him wonder where were they.
The place smelled like corn syrup and roses. Deep down, probably those two were his favorite things. He craved sweet things and the roses reminded him of his mother and her powder.
“So?…” he inquired, you were a little busy placing some towels on the table.
“My mother found a job in a fabric store, in a couple of weeks she’ll be able to refer Tigris. She’ll be able to leave the work with Fabricia” his eyes went wide, a smile immediately growing on his face.
“And not only that. My father accepted to work as a secretary in the offices of the Capitol’s congress” he couldn’t be jealous of the success of your parents when they were offering to help Tigris. He went up to give you a hug.
“That’s great news, dear” you hugged him back. He smelled like cedar and roses. You remembered the flowers his grandmother sent the day before.
“If things go right. My father could get us a job there after the Academy. And we’d have more money to pay the university’s tuition” he nodded, unconsciously hiding his face in your neck. The closure made you blush, it wasn’t like you and the boy hugged very often. But you appreciated it.
“I have faith we’ll have a bright future, Coryo. I really do”
“Thank you, for everything you and your family have done,” the blonde said.
“You are like family too. It’s nothing…” you reply, breaking the hug to check at the oven.
Coriolanus eyes you. He catches the smell of your hair, patchouli, and herbs. He smiles, looking at your clean face and old nightgown. He can’t deny you’ve grown into a gorgeous woman. But he blocks the thoughts from flowing further.
“I made bread pudding.” You knew it was his favorite.
And his smile only grew. When Tigris had the chance to steal from Fabricia and his waste, she made a classical bread pudding. But you were able to do a more sophisticated one. With cherry blossom powder that your mother had. The bread was more wet and less like fudge. Coriolanus loved it ever since he tried back two years during the holidays.
“I’m really liking this day” he admits, making you chuckle as you place the dessert literally in his face.
…
Reaping day wasn’t your favorite. You didn’t hate the districts but you didn’t like how they tried to destroy the Capitol. Nonetheless, the Hunger Games weren’t part of your fond morals. Having the privilege of being a mentor for the first time ever in the history of the games, wasn’t as exciting as it sounded. The only good thing is that it would lead to being closer to knowing who won the Plinth prize.
Months had passed and the day had finally arrived. You slipped into the two-piece set your mother made for you. A blazer and a long circle skirt in dark grey. An old pair of black boots that belonged to your grandmother and were in excellent condition, the leather felt nice and the heels added elegance to your outfit.
You never felt intimidated by not being part of the elite and being considered “poor” and it tore you to see Coriolanus feel like he wasn’t enough. Like the grate was of his last name had to loosen power.
So when you called him through the phone to see if he was ready, he said you should go first, showing a display of a little panic attack because Tigris hadn’t returned with the shirt he was to wear.
As much as you protested and said you would wait for him, he made you leave saying you couldn’t be late.
So you did.
When you stepped out of the building, you encountered Persephone, Coriolanus’ neighbor. The blonde had said once that Persephone and Clemensia were probably the prettiest girls from class. Which made you feel terrible but you ignored it from the moment it happened.
“Hey… Are you ready for today?” She asked.
“Yes… totally” You weren’t happy, to be honest, but you showed her your best smile.
“Why is Coriolanus not with you? He’s always attached to you…” the comment makes you smile nervously. Although you knew most of your classmates and had literally grown up along them, you never knew what kind of assimilation they had about you and Coriolanus.
“Oh, he woke up late. I wanted to wait for him, but he literally obliged me to go on” Persephone giggled, urging you to cross the street.
“That boy is head over heels for you…”
“Oh my goodness, Persephone. That’s not true…” she laughs, her lilac makeup and crimson lips making her look even more pretty.
“Trust me, y/n… There are even bets on the year you two will tie the knot!” Her comment makes you so embarrassed.
“We’re here!” You say changing the subject.
Heavensbee Hall is full of students and faculty. A lot of them say to you because it wasn’t a secret that your friendly demeanor and good grades made you more popular than Persephone.
When make it to the talk with Felix, Festus, and Arachne, you spot Clemensia entering the event along with Coriolanus.
At first glance, you tried to ignore the mixed feelings you caught after Persephone’s comments and seeing the man you quietly doted on the girl he considered the most beautiful.
“That can’t be y/n y/l/n! That’s a model!” you finally turn when you hear Clemmie, which makes you smile shyly.
Coriolanus finally spots you and he gulps. Every day, he saw you wearing opaque tones. He knew you craved vivid colors and exotic makeup, your mother was an unemployed fashion designer after all. Having the chance to wear elegant clothes and highlighting your skin with splotches of berry colors was a sight for Coriolanus. His hands felt sweaty and numb, a familiar feeling he started developing whenever you were close.
He walked straight towards you, taking a last sip of the posca he disliked. You smile at him, accommodating the rosebud attached to his heart. The action caught the attention of all your classmates and friends, who quietly gossiped or exchanged looks.
“That’s a gorgeous shirt, Coryo” he smiled.
“Tigris and your mother are my saviors” he whispered in your ear, which sent shivers to you.
You and your friends are called out to take a seat as the reaping is about to start. You end up seated between Coriolanus and Sejanus. And suddenly you find yourself lost in your thoughts, wondering who you would be mentoring. It’s all you could truly think about since you woke up. But suddenly, Coriolanus makes you come back to life.
“It’s going to be okay…” he said to which you replied with a little smile.
“By the way, you look very pretty…” your heart pounds as he whispers in your ear for the second time. Your smile grows along the blush creeping on your face.
“Really?” You feel so stupid after asking that. You didn’t want him to think you needed validation.
“Every day you look pretty, but I rarely see you with color in your face” he admits and it sends you to death the fact that he proceeded to grab your hand and give it a squeeze.
He didn’t know why he did that, but it felt right.
Something weird happened, you both felt a spark.
…
Watching kids fighting for their lives in the most gruesome way wasn’t appealing. Your eyes are on the little girl from District 8, your tribute; Wovey. The last time you saw her in the zoo before the games started, she made you cry so badly. She was just a little girl and the fact that she had smiled at you, saying how beautiful your dress was, made you understand every word Sejanus said.
The districts deserved to pay? Yes. But why not make them pay extra taxes, or limit their supplies? Why do you have to scavenge food for a little girl who is likely to die?
Sejanus had walked out after seeing what happened to his tribute. The bloodbath had been disgusting to watch. And as the hours pass as you sit along Coriolanus and other classmates watching your tributes, the weight of the events that happened on the previous days hit you. The moment you saw the rainbow-ruffled skirt from Lucy Gray Baird, you knew it would mark a before and after.
It was like her appearance in Coriolanus’ life had worsened everything for everyone surrounding him. First was Arachne, then Clemensia, whose image still haunted you with the scales and yellow eyes. Then the rebel bombing. It had been a long time since felt fear. You felt alone because you protected Wovey. But nobody protected you. The blurred sight of Coriolanus clinging to the ruffles of Lucy Gray’s skirt and calling for her as the medics took him away was very present.
You look down at your lap, the skirt of the uniform was on, but not the pants, since your leg was still bandaged from the burns you suffered the day of the bombing.
There’s a drift between you and Coriolanus since the day of the reaping. He appeared at the zoo and at night told you it wasn’t planned, he practically ignored you whenever he visited Lucy Gray but squeezed your hand the day of Arachne’s funeral. He confided to you what happened with Clemensia but refused to console you when she appeared in the hospital while you took care of Coriolanus.
The only good thing is that your parents were making a name. They were getting popular and you loved seeing them happy. Unfortunately, just as they were finding happiness, you were losing it.
You kept losing friend after friend. Clemensia ignored you moments before the games started. Arachne was gone, and Sejanus looked beyond depressed. And Coriolanus was falling for District scum.
How could he even inquire if the songbird was almost Capitol during the interviews?
Maybe you were a hypocrite for claiming Sejanus as a friend, who once was District and called it his home. But you despised Lucy Gray for wearing the clothes and makeup you craved, for being naturally charming and unconsciously revolving around most of your problems.
You have been quiet for hours, only having eyes for little Wovey.
Coriolanus glances at you frequently. And he can see the sad look on your face. He couldn’t ignore you had been changed since the reaping. The happy and positive girl he knew was slowly morphing into some lost panicked mentor.
The moment the games started, Coriolanus realized how hard it was for you to look after Wovey, one of the youngest tributes he had seen. The guilt of being such a bad friend started rubbing him in the wrong way.
Which is why he found himself constantly looking at you to see how you were doing.
But when he looks back, you’re gone. Most of the people watching the first day are gone.
It’s just Dr. Gaul telling him Sejanus entering the arena.
…
The tension was escalating. Coriolanus couldn’t sleep, not even with the cold shower that resulted nice for the heat. All he could think was about Sejanus and him running for their lives. He killed a boy. There was blood on his hands. He desperately called you but you didn’t answer. He went to bed thinking of Lucy Gray hiding in the arena and you practically ignoring him. And just when he was about to doze off with the memory of the kiss Lucy Gray gave him, his eyes opened abruptly.
He remembered the promise you two made.
When he walked back to Heavensbee Hall for the second day of the games, he could hear Lucky Flickerman giving the broadcast. He went straight to you, firstly noticing how you caressed your knuckles, showing that you were anxious.
“Could you sleep?” He asked, taking a seat beside you. You glanced at him, only to bow your head, back to your knuckles.
“I took some pills…” he frowned, confused.
“Pills?…”
“It’s nothing, Coryo. Just melatonin pills, to help me sleep well.” He nodded, not fully convinced.
“I’m sorry for being… distant,” he said, to which you shrugged, crossing your arms.
“It’s okay. We all have acquired different problems since the reaping. You have just been busy with your rainbow girl” Your tone distilled bitterness when you mentioned Lucy Gray, which didn’t go unnoticed by Coriolanus.
“When one of the two of us wins, it’ll be like before, but better.” he knew it wouldn’t.
“It’ll never be the same. Arachne is gone, Clemesia out of herself, Sejanus defying Gaul, the Ring twins' death… You’re already changing” he quickly took your hand, ignoring the way some people could be looking at him.
“I’m not. We’re family… you’re special. And I will always fight for you, y/n” his comment lit a fire inside you. You give him a little smile. But he knows you’re still blue.
Right when he was closer to admitting he had feelings for you, Lucy Gray appeared, withdrawing any plan he could have. And now he was confused about you.
Perhaps you only saw him as your best friend. Which is why he didn’t suppress the emotions Lucy Gray made him feel.
…
No-no, no, no, no, no… NO!
Every mentor and attendant in Heavensbee Hall heard you whisper until you literally screamed. The little Wovey had drank the water with poison. Tears immediately swelled in your eyes and you stood up, splashing the room with sorrow.
Even Capitol people felt emotional about the little girl slowly dying unbeknownst to her. Even Livia Cardew looked at you with empathy when you walked past her.
Even Clemensia, briefly looked at Coriolanus silently asking if she should go to follow you, but he told her he was going.
And he did. He followed you outside the room, finding you on one of the stairs leading to another hallway. Your hands covered your face, but he could hear you sobbing.
You felt terrible. You knew Wovey was likely to die, but that didn’t stop the pain. Adding all the strong emotions you’ve dealt with in the past days made you explode.
You just wanted your best friend. Regardless of his unrequited feelings, you needed him.
And he magically appeared.
When you wiped your eyes, he approached you. He took a seat beside you and caressed your shoulder.
“You’re not okay.” He said, to which you shook your head.
“I’m feeling the same as you. Only that I’m a crier and you’re not…” Coriolanus briefly smiled, appreciating your profile.
He faced the woman who knew all of him. The only woman that could ever understand him. And the only one who would care for him enough aside from his family.
“You were closer to Arachne than me. With Clemensia too. And your tribute was closer to being a baby again than she was to become a teenager…” new tears poured down and Coriolanus cursed himself for making you cry again.
“Is she finally gone?…” he nodded at you.
“You have to win, Coryo. You must win… This suffering must be worth it for one of us at least”
“If I win, you’re also in. We said it the day the prize was announced. We’re in this together…” Once again, he grabbed your hand again. And just when he was about to move away because you weren’t reciprocating the touch, you caressed his fingers, interlocking your hand with his.
“Lately I’ve been missing you a lot…” you confessed and it nearly made him blush.
“Why?…” it was dumb but he needed to hear something, he needed to comprehend.
“Well…. Because I need you, Coriolanus” his heart thumping and shaky hands prevented him from doing something stupid, but he offered you a lovely smile that you reciprocated.
He was about to say… “I need you too, y/n. Let me kiss you so I can accept whatever I feel for Lucy Gray is a whim”.
But he couldn’t. Because Festus appeared, looking for you two.
“Dr. Gaul wants you two back…” he said.
“Thanks, Festus” you thanked him.
And all the way to the room of commands, Coriolanus held your hand.
When the snakes landed on the arena of the games, Coriolanus stood up. When Lucy Gray was officially the winner, he went running to Tigris. But when he spun to hug you, he didn’t contain.
He grabbed your face and leaned to kiss you. The crowd cheered even harder, believing you two would officially begin a romance after years of uncertainty. You kissed him back, savoring the moment and feeling glad you didn’t give up on him.
“We won, y/n.” He whispered in your lips.
“We won, Coryo” You smiled, out of breath, and kissed him again.
…
His brain wasn’t thinking clearly. Coriolanus had messed up everything. He was being punished for his lies. Serving as a peacekeeper and leaving the Capitol was one thing. But for 20 years?
Perhaps he could follow Lucy Gray to District 12, just to see how was she. But 20 years was too long… especially when you were the woman he intended to marry one day.
He could say goodbye to his place in the University, he could say goodbye to paying the tax of his home. And he certainly could say goodbye to you.
But his biggest fear was that he slipped out you had the idea of the rat poison. Coriolanus was aware you said it vaguely, and he never told you he actually cheated.
As he walked out of Highbottom’s office, completely downcast, wondering how he would break down the news.
“Hey… Are you okay?” His nervousness grew as he watched you walk escorted by two peacekeepers.
“What are you doing?” You shrugged.
“Dr. Gaul wants to see me…” Coriolanus frowned. Was the lunatic going to punish you?
“And you? What are you doing here?” he bit his tongue. He couldn’t tell you yet. But probably it would be worse to wait and tell you in the morning, just when he was supposed to leave for the districts.
“The dean… he wanted to talk to me about the disbursement of the prize”
The guilt started killing him the moment you smiled at him. You leaned, stepped on your tiptoes, and gave him a gentle peck.
It took him by surprise, but caressed your cheeks and kissed you back.
“I’ll see you at home?….” He nodded, pressing his forehead with yours, knowing he probably wouldn’t see you again. His eyes watered and he tried to stop time.
But it was inevitable because you gave him one last smile and you passed by him, followed by the peacekeepers.
Chills assaulted him, but he thought everything was going to be okay. At least for you.
…
For a couple of days, he was able to forget about you. But soon when Sejanus asked how were, the guilt felt like a bucket of ice blocks falling all over him.
He lied, saying you were okay. But Lucy Gray knew he wasn’t being truthful. Coriolanus confessed to her. The songbird found it very hard to admit that Coriolanus’ true love was you. Perhaps he followed her to her home, he was making her happy. But the blonde was Capitol, he would always prefer his people and his girl.
“You have waited too long, darling. Please call her and at least apologize” she said throwing some rocks at the lake in front of them.
“She’s probably mad at me…”
“More the reason to fight for her” Coriolanus glanced at her confused. But Lucy Gray rolled her eyes playfully.
“Look…” she reached for a purple flower. She cut it and showed it to Coriolanus.
“From what I’ve heard of y/n… is that she is important. You said once she’s your best friend. Think of her like this flower, which is a hydrangea. They have medicinal properties and they are very pretty… but they’re delicate. So I think you would prefer to keep her nurtured. Because she’s special…” Coriolanus sighed.
He couldn’t say to Lucy Gray he was scared of losing you because it would mean that all he did the moment he bribed the secretary of the military deferment wasn’t worth it. He came to the twelve because he wanted to be with Lucy Gray, but he had some unresolved feelings for you.
It was so confusing.
“I’ll call her tomorrow during my break…” Lucy Gray nodded, knowing that after that call many things could change. But it was the right thing to do. Because you were innocent.
…
The jabberjays awakened something inside him. The possibility of finding a reason to be sent back to the Capitol sounded very attractive. But all was forgotten when he requested to call your apartment. In the same building, he called home.
He gulped nervously before a female voice picked up the call. Your mother.
“Hello?” She asked.
“Mrs. Y/l/n… It’s Coriolanus” she sighed, the blonde could almost see her nodding.
“Oh, Coriolanus. What a surprise to hear from you…”
“I guess y/n told you I was sent to serve as a peacekeeper” he admitted, surprised to hear your mother didn’t want to kill him for hurting you.
”Coriolanus… y/n has been sick since the day the hunger games closed” he frowned, holding the phone closer to his ear.
“What?…”
“Apparently she was working in the laboratories in the Citadel with Dr. Gaul. She caught a virus and has been quarantined. I’m so desperate to see her again. Her father has been asking but Dr. Gaul says she’ll be fine in a couple of weeks.”
Coriolanus immediately thought back on Clemensia and the “flu” she caught. But now, it was ten times worse.
Did Gaul punish you for helping him to cheat in the games? Were you dead?
His hands started shaking.
“As soon as I’m back in the Capitol. I’ll try to ask for more information. She’ll be okay…” he tried to soothe your mother, but he was already freaking out.
So he didn’t have situate to send jabberjays with the recording of Sejanus revealing his rebel plans. All so he could go back to you.
…
He didn’t regret it. Because as soon as he stepped into the Citadel, back at home, it felt right.
“Welcome back to the Capitol, Mr. Snow,” said Dr. Gaul, tending her water mutts and giving him a sadic smile.
He stood silent for a couple of seconds. Debating whether to ask you or not.
“I know what you’re thinking about, boy,” she said, walking down the stairs of the mutt's cage.
Coriolanus remained silent, carefully eyeing her.
“She couldn’t get away if she was also guilty for putting in your head that silly idea for you to cheat during the games” he gulped, nervous.
“Have you talked with her parents?”
“Just with her mother once. They think she’s sick and will be fine in a couple of weeks. But they’re worried…” he admitted, trying to act relaxed.
“Oh sure they are worried. I heard the man is going straight to the president’s cabinet. And the mother, already spreading her wings in the fashion tendencies…” Coriolanus wasn’t aware that during his time away your parents had spent all of their time working to try to not worry too much about you. To gain power and find a quicker way to be with you.
“I didn’t know…”
“She was very angry when she learned you had lied to her…”
How was he supposed to keep his composure with that talk?
“I never intended to hurt her” he hated to admit that. He couldn’t be vulnerable. But it crumbled just because it was about you.
“Ah, young love. It’s so dangerous because it makes us weak…”
“Is she alive?…” he tried to change the subject.
“You just have to say you want her back and she’ll be in the Capitol’s hospital in a couple of days” he grew more worried.
“She can’t die… or stop being her”
“The snakes in your other friend really triggered you…” Gaul mocked, laughing.
With that lunatic mentoring him, he had to pull out a stronger card. Something that would compromise him as well so she had no choice but to let you go at once.
“I intend to marry her.” The woman stopped laughing, only to look at him, trying to find the lie in his words, but there wasn’t.
“Brave girl to conquer the heart of a Snow…” and with that, she started walking towards another room in the big laboratory.
The room of voxels and human mutations. He grew anxious until Dr. Gaul pointed out a big water tank.
Coriolanus holds a big breath of terror. He tries his best to remain still. But he felt fear. Just when he thought nothing could ever hurt him again, he had to encounter you in the worst possible way.
“What a shame, she was responding very well. Even looks like a mythological monster”
“Is she going to be… human again?”
“With patience, yes. I’ll let you know when we move her to the hospital. It would be nice if you gave the news to her parents. You know, given you’re the reason she almost ended up with a mermaid tail.”
There rested your naked unconscious body, almost completely covered in salmon scales. Your legs seemed to be slowly disappearing, as the scales were tangling them from your hips to your knees. Your hair was matted and your lashes seemed oddly long.
Coriolanus walked home. He couldn’t take the trolley. The walk seemed short, even with the approaching winter. Your image was haunting him. He couldn’t keep the secret to Tigris when he came back home. He pretended to have a giant smile on his face when he blurted that the Plinths made him heir of their fortune. And he tried to ignore the memory of the elevator indicating the name of your floor.
“But she’s going to be okay?” Tigris asked worried.
“Dr. Gaul said so…”
“I thought she was busy trying to get into the university… her parents rarely appeared to be around too”
Coriolanus remembered what he said back in the laboratory.
“I told Dr. Gaul I’m marrying her” Her cousin opened her eyes in disbelief.
“So she could release her?”
“Yes. But also because… I always thought of it.”
“Are you conscious she’s likely to be mad at you for leaving without answers?” Coriolanus nodded, knowing very well you had plenty of reasons to hate him. But there was no going back.
”Very aware…”
“Then you’ll show her again the fine man you are. You remind her why you were best friends.” He was no good man. He killed people to get to the top. But he wouldn’t be that man to you. You were the only one who could possibly understand him and keep his filthy secrets.
“Snow lands on top” Tigris whispered.
Coriolanus turned to look at a picture of you. He and his family love you so much, you had your own portrait in the Snow Penthouse. The first your mother designed was pink and you wore it. You were always very pretty to the eyes of everyone. But only at that moment Coriolanus appreciated your beauty. The he looked at another picture, the one of you two during the reaping ceremony. His tailored shirt and your handmade clothes. That girl and boy were long gone.
But Coriolanus had done so much damage to step back. With Sejanus and Highbottom gone, he had secured a place in the Capitol. Lucy Gray couldn’t hurt him anymore. All he had to do was to win the girl that once belonged to him.
Giving one last look at the picture of you two, he smiled.
“Snow lands on top…” he answered back to Tigris.
_________
#coriolanus snow x reader#young coriolanus snow#coriolanus x lucy gray#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus x you#tbosas#coriolanus snow#tom blyth x reader
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u want some ideas? girl i got u, but apologise early if some of my ideas are something you already wrote
-heeseung coming home and wants nothing but him in your pussy only to find out you riding a dildo while waiting for him. so he end up fucking you with him and the dildo
-jay who had an online meeting at home so u tease him by walking only wearing nothing but his shirt well it ends up him edging you the whole night
-jake your subby baby who tries to dom, you thought he's cant do it but oh boy he proof you wrong
-sunghoon teasing you in public by using vibrator in public
im sorry if its too much
I literally want to write all of them🫠
Starting with Heeseung one!!
"Impatience looks sexy on you"
pairing: bf! heeseung, horny af y/n
genre: pure smut without plot?
warnings: unprotected sex, anal, toy, dirty talk, breeding
author's note: I hope you'll enjoy this, short because I felt like making it short but spicyyyy (I want heeseung so bad)
Heeseung came home from work, tired and hungry. He had a long day of meetings and now he just wanted to relax in his bed with his girlfriend. He walked into the house, taking off his shoes at the door as he always did. He heard noises coming from the bedroom, and he smiled to himself.
Heeseung walked into the bedroom, his eyes widening in surprise at what he saw. You were lying on the bed, your legs spread wide and a dildo buried deep inside your pussy.
You were moaning and whimpering, your fingers working furiously at your clit. Heeseung's cock twitched in his pants as he watched his girl pleasure herself. He walked over to the bed and knelt down next to you, reaching out to touch your thigh.
"What are you doing?" you asked, your voice breathless.
"I'm going to help you cum," he said, his voice low and husky. He leaned down and took one of your nipples into his mouth, sucking hard on it as he reached between your legs to play with the dildo inside you. You moaned and arched your back, pushing your breast further into his mouth. He sucked harder, nipping at the sensitive skin with his teeth.
"Oh god," you moaned, your hips bucking against his hand as he worked the dildo in and out of your drenched cunt.
He could feel you're getting closer and closer to orgasm, and he felt the urge to make sure you came before he fucked you properly.
He pulled his mouth away from your nipple and moved down to your pussy, licking and sucking at your clit as he continued to play with the dildo. You were a moaning mess now, your body writhing beneath him as you approached the edge of orgasm.
He could feel your muscles tighten around the dildo, and he knew that you were close. He increased the speed of his movements, determined to bring you over the edge.
"Oh fuck!" you screamed, your body convulsing as you came hard. Heeseung kept licking and sucking at your clit, making sure that you got every last drop of pleasure from your orgasm. When you finally came down from her high, he stood up and stripped off his clothes, revealing his hard cock. It was twitching, it was all red and both of you knew that he craved you so bad.
"You're not done yet," he said, his voice low and husky. He grabbed you by the hips and flipped you over onto all fours, positioning himself behind you.
You gasped as he entered you, his cock filling your cunt completely. He gripped your hips tightly, thrusting into you with a primal force.
"Fuck, you're so tight," he groaned, his voice rough with desire. He continued to pound into you, his balls slapping against your clit as he filled you up over and over again.
You moaned and cried out, your body rocking back and forth as he drove himself deeper and deeper into you.
“You couldn't wait for your man to fuck you properly, huh? You were so impatient to play with your little toy? Maybe we should use it again on you since you like it that much? My pretty, little slut" He said, spanking your cheeks.
"I'm sorry, Heeseung. I couldn't help it. I was so horny and needed to cum so bad." You said, your voice trembling with desire.
"Please, Heeseung... Please fuck me harder!" He obliged your request, thrusting into you with a renewed vigor. He took a dildo in his hand, pushing the tip in your asshole.
You screamed in pain, but then you started to enjoy it. He started to fuck you with both his cock and the dildo, and you felt like you were being stretched to your limits. But you loved it, and you begged him to keep going. Heeseung continued to fuck you, his cock sliding in and out of your cunt while the dildo pushed into your ass.
You were screaming and crying out in pleasure, your body shaking with each thrust. Heeseung reached around and began playing with your clit, his fingers moving quickly as he brought you closer and closer to another orgasm.
"Oh god, yes! Yes, please don't stop!" you cried out, your body tensing up as you approached the peak of your second orgasm. Heeseung continued to pound into you, his pace increasing as he felt you're nearing your climax.
He could feel her muscles tightening around his cock. He was so rough with you, his own orgasm building inside him.
"Yes, oh yes! I'm cumming! Oh God Heeseung, it feels so good!” you continued screaming, your body shaking as you came all over his cock.
Heeseung kept thrusting in and out of you, he felt your juices coating his cock.
"So needy for my cock, and mine only, huh? You love it when I'm destroying you like this, my little plaything?" He asked, biting your neck lightly.
"Yes, yes! I love it!" you moaned. Heeseung thrust his cock into you hard and fast, fucking you with all he had left.
"Fuck me harder! Harder!" you begged. Heeseung obliged, pounding your pussy as hard as he could until he couldn't hold back anymore and came inside of you.
“Fuck, you feel so good clenching around me like this” He was groaning onto your soft skin on your back.
Heeseung pulled out, rolled off of you and pulled you close to him. He held you in his arms, breathing heavily. “Impatience looks so sexy on you" he said. You smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you," you said softly, resting your head on his chest.
"I love you too," he replied. "So, what's next?" you asked.
Heeseung thought for a moment. "Well, I think we should take a break from sex for a while" he said. You looked at him in surprise. "What? Why?" you asked. Heeseung smiled and kissed your forehead.
“Well, I have to make sure you still know how to walk” He laughed, before pulling you closer for a kiss.
#enhypen hard hours#enhypen smut#enhypen#enhypen hard thoughts#enhypensmut#heeseung smut#heeseung imagines#lee heeseung#enhypen heeseung#heeseung#heeseung please be my man#heeseung give me one chance#dom heeseung is always the best answer if you dont feel well
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welcome home cowboy like me chapter five
he's back!!! and he's putting up DECORATIONS part v is yours, loves. if ya wanna read the first four (!! how did we get here) parts, you can check out my masterlist right here 😊 as always your support means the WORLD to me. i love talking with y'all & hearing your thoughts. lmk what we think of this one!!!
pairing: dbf!joel x fem!reader
summary: joel requests your help to decorate his house for sarah’s return…and a few other things, too
warnings: 18+ minors dni!!! the smut is smutting. oral (f receiving), unprotected p in v sex (wrap it the fuck UP), praise kink, lil bit of overstimulation, age gap (reader is 23, joel is 48), un poco consumption of alcohol, cursing, soft!joel at the end tbh i'm a sucker for him
word count: 5.4k
series masterlist | main masterlist | playlist
It’s where this was headed anyway, wasn’t it? You’ve fucked around with Joel three times now, and none of your clothes have ever made it off your bodies. This is a first. You’ve never had an empty house plus the time and space to really do it. Always someone about to walk in, or someone waiting for one of you. When, if not right this fucking second? “I want,” you breathe, fingers now taking hold of the waistband of his black boxers, “you,” you slip them down, “inside me,” exposing the base of his hard cock, “right now.”
The two front legs of your chair scrape against the wooden floor as you lift it to sit down. Your dad had an early finish today, so said he’d cook dinner. From scratch.
He’d refused your help when you offered to keep an eye on the chicken, was more offended when you said you’d cook the asparagus, and now, looking at your scrunched nose as you stare down at the lumpy mashed potatoes, looks just plain insulted.
“Sit, eat, don’t say a word.”
“I offered to help.”
His fork hits off the porcelain plate and he sighs. “I had a lot to tend to, alright?”
“Chicken, asparagus, and…mashed potatoes?” you say, dragging your fork through the mash – though it’s more lump than it is mash.
“Eat. It.”
You tuck in, ignoring the rattle of the table as you tug your knife back and forth to cut the chicken. Your dad’s face reddens as you chew your way through his meal.
“How was work?”
You throw your mouthful back your throat with a gulp and take a big swig of water. “Good,” you try not to choke out, “Sal let me go early ‘cause it was so quiet.”
“Yeah?”
You nod. “Bill was in lookin’ for screws or something. Was Anna who helped him–”
Your sentence is cut short by your dad’s ringtone, and he leans back in his chair to the sideboard behind to retrieve it.
“Yep?” he says, and you know who’s on the other end. Yep? means Joel. “Shoot, I forgot to ask her. Well, she’s right here, gimme a sec.”
He covers the bottom of his phone with his palm, and nods toward you.
“You alright to head over to Joel’s tonight ‘n help ‘im with the house for Sarah comin’ home?”
You narrow your eyes, head tilting. “What…?”
“He’s got some banner or something. Joel, what is it you got? Yeah, a banner. Decorations.”
He cocks an eyebrow and looks at you blankly.
You slowly nod, teeth pulling asparagus off your fork. “I can help.”
“She’ll be over in a bit, Joel. Alright. Alright. Bye, now.”
The phone is thrown onto the table with a clatter. Your dad silently resumes eating.
You clear your throat, trying to sound normal over something you feel very not normal about.
“You volunteerin’ me for things again? I thought we talked about this when you told Rita I’d fix up her flowerbeds for her.”
“Oh, we’re bringin’ up the past, are we?”
“Just sayin’,” you mutter, staring down at your lumpy potatoes.
“Wasn’t me, anyways. Joel asked for you specially this afternoon. Told him you were workin’, he said to ask you when you got back. Was his idea.”
Was it, now? That’s…interesting.
“What time’s he wanting me over?”
“Whenever. He’s in all night.”
Suddenly you’re not so hungry for overcooked chicken and not-mashed potatoes anymore.
You swallow down what you can – what’s edible, anyway – and head upstairs to get ready. Trying to act casual enough that your dad won’t sense your eagerness.
Sure, just grabbing my shoes. I just want the house to look nice for Sarah. It’s really her I’m thinking of. Okay, cool, see you, bye.
You throw a pair of sneakers on, check yourself once over in the mirror, and grab your keys.
“That was quick,” your dad remarks when you reach the bottom of the stairs. He’s still powering through his asparagus.
“Just…wanna get it done. For Sarah, y’know.”
He nods. “You lookin’ forward to havin’ her back? Your ol’ pal?”
“Sure. Alright, I’m off. Don’t wait up.”
You practically throw yourself out the front door before he can get another word in, striding over to your car. You’re thankful when the late sun hits you to only be in sweat shorts and a vest top; it may be seven in the evening, but the heat is still stifling.
You pull up in Joel’s drive and climb out, giving the neighborhood a quick scan as you walk over to the front door, trying not to skip. Being handed an excuse to spend a few hours alone with him in an empty house feels like winning the lottery, you’re a little embarrassed to admit.
Joel’s in the living room laying out the decorations he’s bought when you walk in. He’s wearing a denim shirt and white Rangers tee underneath, his regular old jeans on the bottom.
His Hello is comprised of a glance up, a lift of his eyebrows, and a quick scan over your body as you approach. You take a deep breath to dissipate the bubbling feeling in your stomach.
“So, you asked for me specially, huh?”
He nods. “It was either you or your dad, and his ass ain’t as nice to look at as yours.”
“Oh, nice. Glad to be of service. Looks good,” you muse, nodding downward.
The supplies are sprawled out over the coffee table between you both. A huge banner folded up; the beginning of the word Welcome visible. A few packets of multi-colored streamers, balloons, and other gold and silver colored stuff lay around it.
“Probably won’t use it all,” Joel says, sniffing. “Just wanted to give her a big welcome home.”
“All my dad did was pick me up at the airport,” you scoff.
Joel looks up, misses a beat, then says, “Well, your welcome home gift is me.”
“Ha. Good one. C’mon. Let’s get started.”
You task Joel with blowing up balloons while you balance along the back of his couch to tape streamers to the top of the walls. It’s a struggle, though, since Joel keeps tying balloons and hitting them over to you, aiming for your head. He titters to himself when your hair begins to go static.
“That funny to you?” you yell, whacking the fifth balloon out of your face.
“Yeah,” he chuckles back. “You should see your hair, kid.”
By the time the streamers are suspended from the ceiling, dancing in the breeze from the open windows, Joel’s out of breath and sweating.
“Hard fuckin’ work,” he mutters, taking off his shirt. He throws it onto the couch without looking, but still, you suspect he knows exactly what you’ll do.
With a sideward glance to him, you lean back and fish it from the couch, throwing it over yourself. There’s something intoxicating about wearing his clothes, smelling him all over yourself, feeling the warmth from his body. Joel knows it. When he glances over at you to see his shirt hanging off your shoulders, he smirks.
“I think we deserve a break,” he says, eyes lingering.
When he makes off for the kitchen, you throw yourself down on his couch, head falling back against the soft cushions.
He returns with two beers, handing one down to you before laying back beside you. Your shoulders rub against one another as you both take a swig.
“Your dad really didn’t do nothin’? When you got home?”
“I guess you could say he did the barbecue,” you reply, shrugging.
“The neighborhood barbecue, that everyone takes a turn at hostin’? The same one he had you out buyin’ steaks and soda for, two hours before it started?”
“I don’t need a welcome home party. I am the welcome home party.” Your middle finger meets your thumb and you give your wrist a shake in the air, and Joel laughs.
“You deserve one.”
“You wanna throw me one?”
“Can do. If you want.”
You smile in response.
A few moments of silence pass. Comfortable silence. You lie, temple resting against Joel’s shoulder, listening to the trees in his back yard rustle, the birds singing. Peaceful, tranquil. Content.
You like talking with Joel. You like when he’s doing other stuff to you, sure, but you like just being around him. It’s different to spending time with anyone else his age. They all want to ask about your future, your career, are you dating anyone?
Joel just lets you be. Doesn’t push nothin’, doesn’t make you worry. Just wants to make you feel good.
Both mentally and physically, of course.
“Heard any more from Arthur Kennedy?” you ask, more just to hear his voice again than anything. You’re kinda worried he’s falling asleep over there.
Joel takes a deep breath, starts playing with the label on his beer bottle. “Nope,” he says, taking a quick sip, “and don’t wanna.”
“What is it with him, anyways? Why is he the way he is?”
“Just a dirtbag of a man. You get ‘em, y’know? Ain’t none of us really like him. I was pissed at your dad for askin’ him the other day.”
“What does he say at Frank’s? What kinda talk does he give?”
Joel shakes his head like he doesn’t even want to open his mouth. When you nudge him, he clears his throat and then speaks.
“Just all this, ‘I bagged this chick last week’, ‘I was messin’ ‘round with this little beauty’… ‘Tighter ‘n a’ this, ‘Wetter ‘n a’ that. We all know he’s just talkin’ load. The man’s too old to even get an erection anymore.”
You snort. “I bet I could run rings around ‘im, if I ever caught him talking like that.”
Joel half laughs, but it falls apart when his tone gets quietly serious again.
“Just…do me a favor, and stay away from him,” he says in a soft voice. “You’d have me up all night if I thought him ‘n his sleazy hands were anywhere near you.”
He turns his head to lean his jaw on your hair. You think over what he just said. The thought of Joel, awake all night with worry about some sleazeball being within a four-house radius of you makes your stomach flutter.
The idea of him being worried about you. The thought of what he’d do if he ever caught wind Arthur Kennedy had even so much as looked at you twice.
Before your stomach lurches out of your throat with the butterflies soaring around it, you decide to cut the moment short.
“Where’s the banner goin’?” You lean forward, placing your beer on the coffee table and taking hold of the sign.
“Was thinkin’ on that wall,” Joel nods to the wall across from the living room door, “so it’s the first thing she sees when she comes in.”
“Uhuh,” you reply, nodding.
“C’mere,” he says, standing up. “Climb on.”
“Climb on what?”
“My shoulders. I can’t reach all the way up there, what with the TV in the way and all.”
“You’re, like, six feet.”
“It’s a big banner,” he grumbles, kneeling to let you swing your legs over his shoulders. “C’mon. Up.”
“Pfft, okay, old man.”
“Old–? Did you just–? That’s not even funny.”
Joel straightens up and you clutch your stomach with laughter.
“Will you just get on, baby?”
“Alright, alright. Stay still.”
You carefully mount his shoulders and his steady hands wrap around your knees, holding you in place. You wobble as he straightens his legs, lifting you so high your head brushes off the ceiling.
“Alright, be careful. No sudden movements.”
“Right here?” you ask, positioning it.
“Little to the left,” he groans, craning his neck to see. “Right there, that’s it.”
You push the pin through the banner and into the wall, releasing your breath once it’s secured. Joel slowly shuffles over to the other side where you line it up and do the same there.
Once all four corners are in place, he steps back, your legs still wrapped over his neck, and you both admire your teamwork. Joel’s thumbs are gently rubbing your thighs.
“Looks good, huh?”
“Mhm,” you reply. “Anything else to go up?”
“Nah. That’ll do.”
“You just keepin’ me up here for company, then?” you ask, leaning over to look at his face.
He looks back up at you and snorts. “Sorry, darlin’.”
Joel slowly makes over to the couch and bends a little, letting you dismount him to stand on the leather cushion. You’re only slightly taller than him, even standing on his furniture.
He doesn’t take his eyes off you, scanning from your lips down to your chest, curtained by his shirt, then over your stomach and down your legs. You know that look. You’ve seen it enough by now. It means…
“What’s next?” you innocently ask, and his eyes snap back up to your face.
Instead of answering, he steps forward, taking your waist in his hands and pulling you against him. His chin tilts up and you smile as you dip your head, connecting your lips.
You immediately deepen the kiss, feeling Joel’s hunger, and satiating your own, too. Your arms drape over his shoulders, relaxing as his form holds you, allowing you to fold into him.
His arms take a grip of you as he bends at the waist, lowering you both down onto the couch, laughing against each other’s lips. He pulls your thighs apart to lean his hips between yours.
His hands begin exploring your body, feeling from your hips over your breasts, making you moan into the kiss, and settle on the collar of his shirt, pushing the sleeves down your shoulders to remove it. In return, your fingers find the hem of his tee and pull it up over his midriff, hunger growing with each hot second that passes.
He leans back, giving you room to whip the shirt over his head, before his naked torso is back on you. His fingers then dance along the waistband of your shorts, untying them whilst his other hand plays at the hem of your vest.
Your shorts lying loose on your hips, he peels your top off of your body, and your shoulders lift to let it over your head. Joel takes the opportunity while your back is off the couch to unclip your bra, throwing the article to the floor.
“Nice,” you whisper into his mouth, and he chuckles in response.
His bare chest, decorated lightly with dark brown hair, is against yours; his lips move to your neck, biting another mark into the sensitive skin. Your head tilts back and you let out a moan, wanting more, but Joel’s taking his time. He’s making every second count.
You buck your hips against his and he lifts his head, giving you a knowing smirk and obeying your silent request. He begins making his way down, not forgetting to stop off by your tits and run his tongue over your nipples.
Your hands find home in his hair and your back arches some as he caresses the hardened buds, lips forming an O shape to suck on one while tending to the other with his thumb and index finger.
When you whine and your hips lift a second time, he moves across your tummy and toward your lowering shorts.
Eyes glazed with lust, you watch as he yanks them down, your panties the only thing separating you from him now. You hear your shorts hit the floor when he drops them, and places a wet kiss over your clothed cunt.
“Joel,” you moan, head falling back against the cushion. He’s driving you fucking insane.
“Mhm,” he murmurs, kissing the insides of your thighs. “Tell me, baby, tell me what you want.”
You writhe under his touch; he’s so close, and yet so far.
“Your tongue,” you whimper.
“Huh? Can’t hear you over your moanin’, pretty girl.”
“Fuck– Need your fucking tongue,” you say as clearly as you can, still whining some.
“Good girl.”
He uncovers your soaking cunt and tears – literally, tears – your panties off of your body, balling them up in a tight fist. You gasp, both delighted and relieved, watching him discard the ripped fabric by his side.
Neither of you give a fuck. You’re desperate to feel each other, be on each other, be in each other.
He dips his head to your sex, and drags a long stripe up to your clit, collecting your juices on his tongue as he does. His tongue runs between your folds, swirling around, licking and threatening to dip further, before he lifts away again.
You let out a long moan, hands still tugging at his hair, attempting to push his head harder on your pussy. He doesn’t budge.
“Patience, baby,” he’s whispering, lowering his chin again to place his soft lips against your swollen clit.
He knows what he’s fucking doing – teasing you and making you wait like this. He wants it to build, really build, before you cum. He’s not cutting any corners.
His lips center over your bud, tongue tapping against it as he sucks, and brings his fingers up to sift through your folds. Your cunt aches for him; your hips find rhythm against his mouth as you fuck yourself off of him, and he lets you.
Feeling how wet you are, he plunges two long, curved fingers into your pussy, and your back, sticky with sweat, peels off of the couch for the second time.
“Fuck, Joel,” you gasp, feeling the stretch of his fingers inside you.
He hums against you, the vibrations of his deep voice pleasuring you more. He’s loving it as much as you are; tasting you, hearing you, breathing all of it in like it’s fresh air to his lungs.
Your breathing begins to falter, your chest rising and falling, your entire body ignited by his touch. You’re panting his name over and over, whining every time his fingers hit the spongey walls of your cunt.
He’s so fucking good at this.
He removes his fingers and replaces them with his lips, mouth planted firmly against your pussy. You widen your legs and he pushes down on your thighs, keeping them apart to make room for his jaw against your core, tongue licking between your folds again.
“Tongue,” you remind him.
“I hear ya,” he mumbles, and opens his lips.
His wet tongue slips into your cunt like it’s made to be there. You screw your eyes shut, pushing your upper back into the couch to lift your ass to him. His top lip cups around your clit as he eats you out, moans strumming against your sex, tongue exploring your wet hole.
“I’m close,” you whisper, and he removes his lips for two seconds to tell you to “Keep goin’, baby.”
“Doin’ so well for me,” he laps at your juices, “taste so fucking good, beautiful.”
He inserts his fingers again to bring you nearer your climax, and your mind starts to blank. You know what’s coming.
You can’t even form the shape of his name with your mouth as you draw nearer and nearer to your high; all you can focus on is the feeling of his hand fucking you, pumping in and out of your tight pussy, the way his tongue soaks your clit, the rutting of your hips all over his face.
It’s so fucking filthy, and so fucking good.
When Joel’s voice breaks through the fog in your brain, telling you to “Let go, baby, I’m here,” you obey him.
The edges of the room start to bleed white as your body lifts, fingers gripping onto Joel’s hair, hips digging further into the cushion.
It’s only ten o’clock; for all you know, Joel’s neighbors might be out in their backyard enjoying the warm night breeze. Do you care? Fuck no. You cry his name loud enough that the whole street might hear.
He coaxes you through it, drinking in your orgasm, moaning when your walls lock around his fingers and you cover his tongue in your sweet wet.
He slips his soaked fingers from your core and you whine at the loss; Joel makes up for it by gently massaging your aching clit as you come down, spreading your cum all over you.
“That’s it, baby, did so good. That felt good, huh?”
Still coming to, you don’t reply; you feel his weight back on top of yours, his safe arms wrapping around your shoulders.
“’s okay, darlin’,” he coos as your sight starts to return. He peppers your neck with gentle, wet kisses, bringing you back to earth.
Before even you realize it, your fingers are grasping at his jeans, blindly trying to undo the button and zipper. Joel laughs, lifting his hips to give you better access.
You giggle, loosening them and hauling them past his hips, and he sits up to drag them down his legs and shove them off near your shorts.
“What now, sweet girl?”
Your voice is low, serious. Barely above a whisper.
“Fuck me.”
He almost looks taken aback. As if he never thought he’d hear those words escape your lips. Like he’d been pushing you, further and further, expecting you to always hold back, always bounce back from the edge.
And here you are, clutching his arms and hauling him over with you.
It’s where this was headed anyway, wasn’t it? You’ve fucked around with Joel three times now, and none of your clothes have ever made it off your bodies. This is a first.
You’ve never had an empty house plus the time and space to really do it. Always someone about to walk in, or someone waiting for one of you. When, if not right this fucking second?
“I want,” you breathe, fingers now taking hold of the waistband of his black boxers, “you,” you slip them down, “inside me,” exposing the base of his hard cock, “right now.”
Joel’s eyes darken just as his huge cock bounces free from his underwear.
He’s watching your lips breathe out the words like it’s all he ever wanted to hear, all he’s thought about since that first night with your hands on his thighs, looking up at him so innocently.
Just waiting to be fucking ruined by him.
You slur the words again. “F-fuck me.”
“Yeah? ‘s that what you want?”
“Mhm.”
He’s kneeling over you now, helping you tug the underwear down his legs, precum-coated tip of his cock drawing circles on your stomach.
When he’s fully naked, he presses his body against yours, speaking to you between hot, wet kisses.
“You sure you can take it, pretty girl?”
“I’m sure,” you reply, lust taking over any remnants of your orgasm. Just fucking fuck me.
Joel’s hips raise, and he looks down to guide his cock to your hole. You bring your knees up, positioning them just under his biceps.
“Good,” he mumbles under his breath.
You’re so wet that when he runs his shaft through your folds, slicking himself up, his tip kisses the entrance of your cunt, drawing a gasp from you and a growl from Joel. You’re desperate for him to just slide in, make himself at home where he belongs, between your hips.
And when he does, it’s fucking euphoric.
He’s big. You knew this already. But feeling him inside you is different.
He pushes in halfway first, letting you get used to him.
“Okay?” he asks quietly.
You nod; your voice catches in your throat as he falls out of you, just to thrust in again and let his cock dive through your soaked, swollen folds straight into your warm cunt.
He’s so big that when he bottoms out inside you for the first time, your mouth falls open wordlessly, and your brain shuts down for a few minutes. Nothing but the feeling of him slipping in and out of your cunt slowly, fucking you dumb.
When he knows you can take him, he picks up the pace, dragging his hips back and forth against yours, filling you up until his tip kisses the edge of your cervix, and pulling out until he’s between your folds again.
You’re holding onto his shoulders like you’re hanging off a cliff edge. The feeling of his hot skin under your arms is the only thing keeping you grounded right now; the pressure between your legs with each thrust of his huge cock threatening to pull you off the edge of the abyss.
When his voice breathes in your ear between his groans, you snap back to reality. Thighs burning, nails scratching, pussy throbbing reality.
“You okay, baby?”
“Mhm.”
“Let me hear you, pretty girl, tell me how good it feels.”
He’s going faster still, balls smacking against your ass every time he bottoms out, sighs and whimpers passing your lips.
You whine his name, telling him, “Harder,” and he obliges, hips snapping ever stronger. His pubic bone grinds against your clit as he thrusts, the pressure spreading spots of pure bliss across your vision.
You look down to where your bodies connect, mesmerized by the sight of his cock pumping in and out of you. It turns you on even more.
“We look good, huh?” his voice lulls from above, and you look back up to find him watching you.
He dips his head and kisses you, and you start to near your second high.
“Joel,” you mewl, the feeling so good you can’t even form the words to tell him.
He knows, anyway.
“So good, baby,” he’s panting, sweaty forehead leaning against yours, “gonna cum all over me again?”
You nod, eyes screwing shut. He’s fucking you so good you’re barely remembering to breathe.
“Let go, darlin’, let me hear you,” he whispers, and you fold.
Joel bites into the crook of your neck and lets out a loud groan as he feels your pussy clamp around him. He fucks you through it, only slowing for a few seconds to let it wash over you, then picks the pace straight back up when you quieten and your breathing calms.
You’re so fucking overstimulated, but he’s not done, and you know what he wants. You want something, too. Maybe you two could work together.
“Joel?”
“Mhm?” He’s gone quiet, chasing his own high. You hear his breathing stammer when you say it.
“Want you to do it from behind.”
“Beh–” He’s almost gasping for breath, but when he understands what you mean, he wastes no time.
Wordlessly, he loosens his grip on you and pushes himself up, dick slipping out. You moan at the feeling of emptiness as it pulls out of you.
He gives you space to turn over, helping you move further up the couch with steady hands on your hips. When you settle, he lifts your ass up.
“Not gonna last long, baby,” he tells you, and you nod. Your right ear lies flat, sweat sticking you to the leather, hands splayed out above your head gripping the cushions.
You feel him line up again, his thighs against yours. Your breathing jilts as his head pushes in, followed by his shaft, filling you up, deeper and deeper until his balls kiss your clit.
You let a deep moan pass your lips. Joel groans, hips leaving your ass, only to smack into them again as he fucks you even deeper from this position.
He’s stretching you out more than you thought possible, cock spearing into you, tears swelling across your half-shut eyes. The feeling, the pain, too good to ask him to stop, but so overwhelming you can feel every thought, every instinct, every other feeling, leave your body with every thrust.
Joel’s all you know. He’s all you want to know.
Your legs start to give, and he places his rough hands on your waist to hold you up, pumping in and out of you at a punishing pace.
“Joel…” you whine.
“I know, baby, I know. I’m there, too.”
You feel his weight pushing on the back of your thighs and open your eyes to see him leaning over you, hands placed either side of your head. You lace your fingers with his and let him fuck you, totally mindless to everything around you except for the man at your ass, pummeling his dick inside you so deep your cunt is aching.
It pushes you over the edge.
Your walls squeeze his dick, threatening to pull him over with you. Your vision blanks for the third time tonight; what energy you have left is poured into the filthy cry which escapes your lips as Joel’s hard cock splits you open.
“So tight, baby, good fuckin’ girl.”
Joel begins to falter, his thrusts become sloppy, and he pushes your ass off of him so not to finish inside you. You kinda feel disappointed, wishing he’d just stay inside and fill you to the brim with his cum.
Joel gives himself a couple more strokes before you feel his seed coat your ass, warm, dripping down the small of your back and the underside of your thighs.
You moan at the feeling of him spilling all over you, the grunts he lets slip as his orgasm washes over him. You smile dumbly at the thought that you’re the one doing this to him; you’re the one covered in his cum. You’re his, even if it’s only in this moment.
He’s panting behind you. He almost collapses on top of your back, propping himself on his elbows to keep some of his weight off.
He gently leans down and nuzzles his nose against your ear, eliciting a quiet giggle from you.
“You okay?” he breathes.
You nod. “Better than okay.”
“You sore?”
“A little.”
“Baby…” he coos, and pushes himself up.
You sigh as his weight leaves you, and you hear his footsteps pad into the kitchen. You stay put, in part to keep from staining Joel’s couch with…well, Joel, but mostly because you’re too fucked-out to even move. Too fucked to feel your thighs, your back, never mind between your legs.
Joel returns with paper towel, and softly wipes from your back to your thighs, cleaning up his mess. He massages your muscles as he goes, and your eyes shut over with the sweet feeling.
When he’s done, he rolls you over and takes hold of your ankle, pulling you down the leather to his grasp, where he puts his tee over your head and helps you feed your arms through the sleeves. The Rangers logo sits just below your chest.
He pulls his boxers back on, before taking your outstretched arms and scooping you up in his. Your head falls limp in the crook of his neck, his arms wrapped securely around your waist.
He carries you, completely dazed and fucked, out of the living room and upstairs. He makes a right at the top, down the dim hallway, past the same closet he went down on you in just two days ago, toward a door at the end. He knocks it open and takes you through.
Even in your half-sleeping state, you know exactly where you are. You’re in Joel’s bedroom.
You’ve been in here before, maybe only a couple times, when Sarah’s needed something or you’ve accompanied your dad to help repair something for Joel, but it feels different now.
It’s dark, the sun almost set on the other side of the house and the streetlights’ glow a burning orange right above Joel’s headboard.
He carries you over to the left side of the bed and lays you down in his soft sheets. He tucks you under the comforter and bends to place a long, tender kiss on top of your head.
You begin to swim in and out of sleep, waking to find him folding your clothes into a neat pile by the bedside, then again to watch him set a glass of water on the nightstand.
Your eyes are glued shut with exhaustion when you feel him lift the duvet behind you and slip in, taking your waist under his forearm and pulling you flush against his frame.
You listen to the faint sound of a cell phone dialing, and then hear his voice; soft, hushed, but still normal Joel.
“Hey, man. Yeah, no, everything’s fine. We were pretty late finishin’ up with these decorations, and then The Shining was on TV, so we stayed up to watch it. She’s pretty exhausted. I let her take Sarah’s room, I hope that’s okay?”
Your dad’s voice is faint down the line as you begin to drop off in Joel’s arms.
“Sure thing, thanks, Joel. You kick her out first thing, you hear? Don’t want her holdin’ you up for gettin’ Sarah.”
When you hear him slide his cell back onto his nightstand, you mumble something incoherent into his arm.
“What, darlin’?” Joel asks, head lifting to hear you better.
“I said, great welcome home party. Thanks.”
His lips press lightly on your shoulder, his breath hot on your skin. Whatever it is he says, you don’t hear it, already long gone to a deep, comfortable sleep.
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#joel miller#joel miller fic#dbf!joel#dbf!joel miller#joel miller x reader#the last of us#tlou#tlou fic#joel miller smut#fic: cowboy like me
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Graceland too
Clarisse la rue x fem!reader (Athena's kid)
Sumarry: When a certain daughter of Athena felt unappreciated her whole life, someone was there to see her.
Warnings: Sad girl hours, shitty parenthood, hurt/comfort because im no monster and probably other things wich i forgot.
a/n: look who is back!
Demigod.
Half blood.
Half a goddess.
Half a human (?).
And yet, fully a disappointment.
When Athena sent me to my Dad's house, in a golden crib, dressed in pure white dress, glowing, how the myths would expect a demigod to be, then, and only right then i was a gift.
A piece o divine love, something to prove to him, till the end of his life, that at some point, he was good enough for a Goddess.
But days after, immediately, i was just a crying baby, hungry, with a busy father, without a mother, and that only made him remember that, that was it.
He wasnt good enough for her, she wasnt staying, she never even actually even considered, he would never have that kind of honour, only a crying baby he never expected.
I wasnt a gift anymore, it actually felt like i was a insult, everything about me started to enrage him.
And oh, how did he reminded me of that every single day of my existence.
When i got diagnosed with dyslexia all i've heard whas that Athena gave me up to him because i was defective, when i couldnt sit still during classes, and exploded with all the repression i suffered everyday, suddently i was a clock bomb, when my grades where great, i was never rewarded, it was "the least i could do, to make up for the shame that i was".
I was never loved, never wanted, never encouraged, at least not by him.
The very little love i've known in my life, i own to the people who felt pitty of me.
The teachers, the neighbours who have heard the insults, the stray animals who could sense sadness, the very old grandparents who never actually saw me more than twice a year, and the people who worked at a nerby library, who let me stay past closing time, leaving only with the cleaners.
I was 12 when he had enough and sent me to camp, literally the very day school was over.
I came home to my clothes packed and him waiting by the car keys.
Being in camp for the first time, was also the very first time in my life i have ever felt....normal.
Not good, not bad, not great, not terrible, i was one, and that was enough.
I spend that summer being quiet, i sat in the corner, i didnt spoke, i didnt interrupted, i didnt had any ideas, i wasnt good enough to do that, thats what i've been told my whole life, thats my true.
It took a whole new summer for Athena to claim me.
I have always wondered if she was fighting with herself, if she had any problems having to admit that she made a mistake, with me, or with him.
It didn't matter, for the first time i had brothers and sisters, who wanted me, who understood when i wasnt the best, who asked for my graded tests, to put up in the wall.
They understood when i was hard to crack, when i insisted in being quiet, when i wouldnt share my ideas, they understood it all.
I didn't.
Each and every new summer i spent there, all i could ask myself was:
Why could i not be great like all of them?
Why im still afraid?
Why i was still useless?
Im now sixteen and the same questions still were unanswered.
And today i felt worse than ever.
It was my birthday, and i havent got a single letter from him, nothing, nothing.
It felt like he was saying i wasnt worth anything again.
Earlier, i tried to pretend nothing was happening, smiling with my siblings, finally making plans for capture the flag, finally belonging like i promissed i would try to do that year.
My plan was used, it wasnt perfect, but it was used, and surprising myself and the other team, we won.
I could see the other team confused, and Clarisse cussing us to death.
Still i was so happy, for the first time in my life i showed myself, and i worked....partially.
The happiness of victory didnt last much in me, because i saw a new brother of mine almost bursting to tears, he was young and just got claimed a few days ago, he wasnt used to that, and he wasnt supose to get hurt, but the red that painted his arms said otherwise.
I couldnt stare at him without feeling like i failed again.
Why couldnt i be perfect for once?
I took him to infirmary and held his hand while he was getting his stiches, saying sorry all the time.
I tried thinking it was okay, people get hurt, move on.
I had diner, i took a bath, i tried to sleep, i couldnt.
The tears were falling down and i knew i wouldn't be quiet.
So i got up and walked to the cabin's porch, sitting on the last step and letting my head fall to my knees.
Why couldnt i be great?
Why couldnt i be in peace with myself?
Why couldnt my mom bless me?
Why couldnt my dad love me?
Why did he had to be so mean?
I was a kid for fucks sake.
"Are you okay?" I heard someone saying, that made me freeze, that voice was not from any of my sisters, was i crying so hard i woke up someone from other cabin?
"I- yes, sorry i didn't knew i was crying so hard to wake people from other cabins, im sorry"
"You didn't, i was sneaking out to train some more, and saw you, our cabins face each other"
That was...Clarisse?
I wiped my tears and look up, she was staring at me with a almost worried look
"Clarisse?"
"Yes, why are you crying?"
She sat down by my side, dropping a sword in the grass.
"Its nothing really, im fine, you dont need to bothe-"
"No, cut the crap" she stopped me mid sentence "no one ever weeps in the middle of the night out of happiness, you are not fine and im not letting you lie OR leave until you tell me what it is"
We stare at each other, and ill need to thank the night light being bad because i probably look like crap right now, im sure my eyes are red, my nose too, im probably with a very swollen face and id bet all the dracmas i own that my hair its no better than a nest of birds.
"Go on...tell me"
I layed myself in the stairs, looking at the sky, trying to think of a way to tell everything, without sounding crazy
"I dont deserve to be here, Clarisse."
"Here..where?"
"This cabin, i dont deserve to be called daughter of the goddess of wisdom, i dont deserve being here with them, my siblings they are great, more than good, great, they will do great things with themselfs, amazing writers, architects, brilliant musicians, historians, why am i here? Im not even good, why im with the great?"
"Wait wait wait" she made me sit down again and look at her "not even good? What are you talking about? Wasnt the strategy in the last capture the flag yours? Yall won, and if somebody asks me later i've never said this but that was good, some really good strategy, i was almost thinking of asking chiron to switch you teams, you were great, more than that, and now you're here telling me you are not egen good? Are you on drugs?"
"Clarisse you dont need to pretend you care that much, and my plan wasnt all that, my brother got hurt, that wasnt supose to happen, i failed him, if i was good enough he wouldnt even be there"
She had a very confused look on her face, like she really did not knew what i was talking about.
"You're not talking about the little boy you took to the infirmary and that small cut in his forearm are you? Cause that boy was far from almost dying like you are making it sound like-" she looked at my eyes, i didnt needed a mirror to have sure how i was, i've seen myself like that too much to count, everytime my dad said i wasnt good enough, sad, lifeless.
"I failed again Clarisse, im not good enough to be here, im useless, worthless"
She looked at me and did the last thing i tought she would, Clarisse hugged me.
"Dont say that, c'mon, worthless? I've seen you fight, i've seen your plans, you dont talk much but i've heard your ideas, you are far from being useless or worthless, who the fuck told you that?"
"My f- you heard me?" I looked at her, only to see a look i couldnt distinguish "what do you mean?"
She looked at her own feet, then at her sword, reflecting the moonlight.
"You really dont know?" She looks at me "i- well, i've heard you, the same way i see you everyday, thats how i know you like morning walks, sweet green grapes, baked goods...how i know you are probably the only child of Athena who has never read "the art of war", that you walk without looking at peoples faces....its weird, i've seen you so much throughout this years and it feels like this is the first time you are actually seeing me"
"But i've saw you before-"
"Thats not what i was saying, you looked at me many times, but did you ever saw me until today?"
I looked at her blinking, and after a moment of silent i said "you like dark chocolate, and lemon flavoured soda, and sneaking out to train when the harpies take their breaks, by the way you missed that, and you always ask for double the quantity of food you eat, so when you burn it you still can eat enough, by the way i stole that idea-"
She is smilling, big, really big, i think i am too.
Of course i saw Clarisse, who wouldnt, she was strong, brave, beautiful, to me was a wonder she didnt had people running to get her attention.
She got closer to me "does that mean i can-" i stopped her mid sentence again
"Maybe..."
"Im going to make you forget that "im not good enough" nonsense, belive me"
She is smilling while kissing me, and i am too.
#fanfic#lesbian#clarisse la rue x reader#clarisse pjo#pjo series#pjo tv show#clarisse la rue#clarisse x reader
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