#good expression work!!
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in spite of everything, I had fun <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itafushikugi#jjk 271#well we made it :'>#im kind of ignoring a lot of the tag rn ghsdff ik people are upset#if u follow me u know th full extent of my thoughts on the wrapping up of the series but tl;dr the caption says it all#this series meant a lot to me and im working on a bigger tribute to fully express that love and gratitude#but take a redraw 2 tide u over for now#im just so happy. its bittersweet but those r my kids n theyre tgt and theyre okay#i think the return to normalcy is good fr them. i say let them rest n b together n process everything in time#/i'm/ satisfied with what i got out of jjk as a whole and that's all that matters to me#however ik that not everyone shares tht sentiment n thats valid!#regardless of how u feel abt the finale i hope that u at least take time to remember things abt the series that brought u joy#thats all i can say#oh yeah anyway i lightened up megumi's expression his face is so funny in that panel i can't believe he really said -_- until the very end#still tho i think megu deserves a content lil smile
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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original by @/sweepswoop_ on twitter
#art#futurama#How the hell do u draw a side profile when theyve got 1 eye#artists on tumblr#futurama fanart#philip j fry#turanga leela#freela#woulda done bender too but the ugly little puppy eyes look doesnt really work for him since he has no nose#planet express#hulurama#digital art#fry#im not calling you good boy
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[ID: An eight page digital comic featuring Sam, Celia, and Alice from The Magnus Protocol on a gray background. The characters are all colored with a single color each. Sam is red, Celia is green, and Alice is pink. Sam is a fat Arab man with short curly dark hair, a mustache, and a small goatee, and he is wearing small black earrings, a cardigan, a turtleneck, trousers and loafers. Celia is a taller Korean woman with short dark hair and she is wearing rectangular glasses, piercings including an industrial piercing, an x-shaped earring, and snakebites, a button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a vest, trousers, and black wrist cuffs. Alice is an even taller white woman with long fluffy hair and crooked teeth, and she is wearing cat eye glasses, three pairs of earrings, snakebites, a flannel shirt, a hoodie tied around her waist, a patchwork skirt, bracelets, and a lanyard.
Sam and Celia are stood at a table covered in papers. Celia urgently turns to Sam. Celia: Alice is coming! She can't catch us researching, we need a diversion, QUICK! How can we make her think we're not doing what we're doing? Sam, shrugging really hard: UHHHH she thinks I have a crush on you?? Celia, sweating, turns back to where Alice is coming from, panicked, and turns back to Sam, shrugging and reaching for him. Celia smiling a bit manically: Yeah, that'll work, sure!
Sam, with Celia's hands grabbing his cardigan: Wait whaAAAA- He is pulled out of frame. Alice walks in: Hey Sam, working hard or hardly woOOOAA She leans on the doorframe as she holds a hand to her chest in shock.
The next panel is rendered with soft pink shadows and "shoujo sparkles" in the now pink background. Sam is sitting on the table holding onto Celia, whose face is buried in his neck as she wraps one arm around his back and the other holds up one of his legs under his knee. Neither of their faces are visible. The rest of the page fades back to gray from there. Sam and Celia look over at Alice, hair ruffled, Sam is now blushing. Sam: ALICE!! He pushes Celia away and they look at each other for a moment, panicked. Sam: It's- .... exactly what it looks like! Celia: Aw, you've caught us! He rests his hands on her shoulders and they both look in opposite directions as though embarrassed. Celia is also blushing lightly. There are red and green neon signs pointing to them reading "Totally Ham-Slammin'" and "GAY! (in an M/F way)" respectively.
Alice looks to be in shock with a vacant expression and a computer pop up over her forehead reading "Alice.exe has stopped responding". In the next panel she is fine again and back to smirking. Alice: WOW SAM, didn't know you had it in you! Now I'm no snitch, so I didn't see anything, BUT- you lovebirds should cut it out before Gwen catches you. Celia and Sam look at each other anxiously, cheeks pressed together as she speaks. Alice: You KNOW she'd tell Lena. Celia, pulling back and smoothing her hair out: Oh, for sure. Sam: Th-Thanks, Alice. Alice: Don't mention it! I'll give you crazy kids a minute to straighten up, TA-TA~ She waves as she leaves.
Sam and Celia listen to her steps fade before going "phew" and finally pulling away from each other, now holding hands at an arms distance. Celia: You alright? That was kinda sudden.... Sam: It's fine! Just a bit caught off guard. Celia: I can't believe she actually bought all of that! Sam: Me either! Works for me, though.
Celia: Did you want to get down- Sam, pulling away suddenly, blushing again: NO! He crosses his legs and looks away sheepishly, scratching his head. Sam: I wanna stay here another minute or so.... Celia, concerned: You sure you're alright? Sam: Yeah! Just, er.... Celia looks at him, confused. Sam, blushing increasingly harder: Ahem. (He folds his hands in his lap politely.) I am not immune to being thrown on a table. Celia, smiling and politely stepping away: AH! .... Noted~
She walks away casually, still smiling. Celia: I'll give you a minute to collect yourself. Sam, head down in his lap, embarrassed: Thanks.... He looks up after she leaves. Sam: Wait. He straightens up, slightly panicked, face entirely red. Sam: What do you mean by "NOTED"?!
end ID]
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i am SO glad this episode didn't entirely debunk the silly headcanon that birthed this comic. initially i wasn't convinced sam actually had a crush so i made this like "well if he didn't before, HE DOES NOW" so.... here's this silly comic thing <3 i just think they're neat <3
#fg's art#the magnus protocol#tmagp#samama khalid#celia ripley#alice dyer#do sam and celia have a shipname yet. idk.#also i am REALLY proud of the expressions in this one#also also if you see inconsistencies no you don't <3#also also also i hope the id is good!! still not used to doing comics and stuff but i hope it works!
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"Never be Alone"
Started on the sixth of January and planned to be finished on the fourteenth, but landed up not doing that. Somewhere on the sixteenth, I basically said "haha whoops" and pumped out twenty panels. According to Procreate, it took 15 hours and 37 minutes to finish Panels 1-10; 27 hours and 15 minutes on Panels 11-20; and 34 hours and 8 minutes for Panels 21-30.
In total, I have no idea. I just know it took some serious time.
Unlike with She's Gone, I wrote a script. Well, all I wrote was dialogue and some minor actions for Panels 5-23, though lines were changed "in post." Everything else was by the seat of my pants. However, I can say for sure that I was planning on ending it with N being hopeful, but all I had room for was him crying. He cannot catch a break.
(also to those who suspected uzi was still in there, guess you were right all along.)
#murder drones#solveruzi au#solver uzi#murder drones n#murder drones uzi#murder drones tessa#serial designation n#uzi doorman#tessa james elliott#the absolutesolver#i wish you could've heard the things i said while working on this#''the absolutesolver calls out n's loneliness: the comic''#''YES COIL AROUND HIM LIKE A SNAKE YESSS''#''ooh what if this was a callback to the silly nuzi kiss comic i made''#''WHAT IF THE INNER HEXAGON MOVED AROUND LIKE A PUPIL''#''uzi he can't hear you!! he's full of good vibes!!''#''oh my god. my art really IS expressive''#''this is not love this is hypnotism''#tw knife#just in case because tessa did use her chekhov's stabby stick here#zeisty’s heavy hitters#zeisty’s comic stuff
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Blood Blossom Au: Baby's First Commissioner Meeting :)
TL:DR This Post: Danny (orphan) gets poisoned with blood blossom extract by Vlad. He runs away from him and ends up under the care of one Pre-Robin Battinson Batman! Starry is loudly pushing her batdad agenda.
(Also known as "Late At Night, When The Nightingale Sings" on my ao3!)
This was a fun rough idea I've been sitting on for weeks, thinking about how Commissioner Gordon and Nightingale's first meeting might go.
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Commissioner Gordon likes to think that he's adjusting to the new normal of Gotham very well, -- the new normal being grown men running around dressed like bats, in military-grade strength body armor, committing acts of vigilantism, -- and slowly, little by little, he was no longer being surprised when this new normal pops up out of the shadows like the world's most terrifying daisy. His shaving lifespan thanks him for it.
....
The kid is a surprise though.
Granted, he seemed to be a surprise to the Bat too.
There's been a string of murders lately, -- which, in Gotham, is kind of like saying there's been another storm during monsoon season. And there's just been another; in some dilapidated building down in south Gotham, with the broken, boarded-up windows and mildew-crawling walls to match. The victim is a man in his thirties, multiple gunshot wounds to the chest, left in the center of the room for the blood to pool out around him.
The place is already secured when he arrives, the building swarmed with officers and the forensic detectives. The Bat emerges shortly after he does -- or, he might've been here the whole time, hiding someplace dark and shadowy. For his own sanity, Gordon doesn't think about it too hard.
The kid is a surprise, and he appears like a bolt of lightning.
He shows up in the middle of a conversation Gordon is having with the Bat.
A whistle, sharp and loud, slicing through the air, meant for open air rather than a confined space. Gordon's ears pierce and protest the sound, and the solemn, murmured chatter floating through the room abruptly cuts off like the swing of a gavel. As he turns towards the sound -- as they all do -- he swears, up and down, that he sees Batman's shoulders jump, just slightly.
At the source, perched on the window, is a boy. A boy in a gray-blue scarf and an oversized black hoodie, one that hangs off his frame and has ace bandages wrapped around the wrists in some attempt to cinch the sleeves. The hood is up, big like the rest of it, and threatens to swallow the upper half of the boy's face whole in the fabric. What upper half Gordon can see, is smeared with some kind of opaque, black face paint. He's holding onto the side of the frame with one hand, on his hip is a grappling hook. A familiar grappling hook.
Gordon has multiple questions, and his officers tense up.
Martinez puffs up, brows furrowing as his face shapes into a frown. Shoulders rolling back. "You can't be here, kid--"
The reaction is immediate, like a spark to gunpowder, the boy yanks his fingers from his mouth and his mouth twists into a scowl. Head snapping over to Officer Martinez, his hood manages to stay on but Gordon swears that as he bares his teeth, the glint makes them look sharper than they should be. His voice is rasp and quiet and harsh; snappish in its hissing; "Put a fuckin sock in it, Martinez. I'm not stayin."
Martinez reels back, and the boy immediately veers his attention off him. Like a switch, his demeanor drops. Despite half his face being covered, his mouth twists into a cringing, apologetic smile. Slanted and off-beat, embarrassed. It'd be disarming if this wasn't Gotham, and if he didn't just hiss at Martinez like he was about to bite his head off.
"Sorry." He whispers, voice deceptively polite and softer now. Gordon has to strain his ears to hear him. "I was looking for him."
He points his finger towards-- Gordon? No, Gordon follows the direction, and finds himself looking at -- the Bat.
The Bat, who always looks stiff as a pole, now looks even stiffer. Somehow. Well, the explains the grappling hook attached to the boy's waist.
"What are you doing here?" The Bat says, gruff and unable to completely smother the stumble of surprise in his tone.
The boy still holds a sheepish smile, and slips off the window ledge. His feet hit the creaky boards with a near-silent thud, the Batman finds his feet and rapidly begins crossing the room.
Gordon notes the slight tremble in the boy's legs as he straightens. He adjusts his scarf, which droops close to his knees now that he's standing, and slings a backpack -- how long has had that? -- off his shoulders. When the Bat reaches his side, he does as he always does, and looms over the boy like a spectre. A threatening mass of shadows cloaked in all-consuming black. Standing next to him, the boy looks teeny in comparison.
The Bat is a man who terrifies even the most hardened criminals, Gordon has seen grown men shiver in fear at the mention of his name. And yet when the boy looks up at him, he doesn't even flinch.
Instead, his sheepish smile melts away like ice under the sun, holding only traces of his previous embarrassment. It remains as a shadow on his face, a small upturn at the corners of his mouth. The boy pushes his hood back just enough to reveal glinting, ice-flint eyes surrounded in tar-black face paint. He holds the backpack up with one arm. "You forgot this."
#I have never seen Batman (2022) so really I'm just using battinson and crew as templates for my fic. but hey what else is new lol#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc fic#dpxdc au#dp x dc au#dpxdc fanfic#i dont know shit about detective work or true crime so forgive me for any bad terminology or incorrect procedure for how these things work#just a fun rough idea for how i imagined gordon's first meeting with nightingale goes LMAO. im sticking to the idea that danny doesn't#officially join the field for a *while* due to more than just health reasons. so his first appearances are brief and usually to give B smth#danny: im only here as express delivery for vader's little brother over there. yall stay safe tho.#bruce: *kill bill sirens bass-boosted* ohmygodwhatishedoinghere#batman: how did you get here... | danny: you have so many spare grappling hooks it was pr easy to just grab one and go#also danny is whispering on purpose because he doesn't have his ghost form to fall back on as a secret identity. so he *is* actually taking#extra steps to keep his identity safe. and people usually sound different when they're whispering. he also has personal beef with#office martinez despite the fact that they've never met. Danny's HEARD of his ass. he hATES his ass.#Martinez: *to batman* freak | danny: im going to Bite Him. | batman (reluctantly): hmr. please don't. | danny: im going for his shins#Martinez and Nightingale have this whole thing going on between the two of them. danny WILL slap a sticky note on Martinez's back that says#'asshole' on it and its the one spot square on his spine that martinez can't reach.#someone: why are you beefing with like. an actual 12 year old | martinez: HE'S A LITTLE RAT. THAT'S WHY. he's here to torment me#battinson: *did you grapple the whole way here* | danny: yah. it was kinda fun. i would've gotten here faster but i kept having to stop#battinson: *hnnn* im driving you back | danny:.. are you sure? | battinson already pulling him out of the room: y e s#i've been thinking about this for literally WEEKS. what did bruce forget? good question! i'll figure that out if or when i get to this#danny has Issues behind the word freak so its like a mini beserker button for him regardless of who the word is aimed at lol. lmao#martinez calls batman a freak once while nightingale is within range and its just the doom ost as danny simply Disappears from sight#like oops. you are now. In Danger. rip couldn't be me.#blood blossom au
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Mental Health Tip! Don't skip meals lest you be fighting demons
#Big Hero 6#BH6#Hiro Hamada#au stuff#uhhhh#cw existential dread#I guess? Not really the exact emotion expressed in this specific instance but it is the overall issue#something something Hiro survivors guilt he keeps avoiding because that's a whole nastier can of worms than standard grief#“I'm moving on from Tadashi's death so I'm almost good!” he says meanwhile the EVERYTHING ELSE is still waiting to be unpacked#Cus like fun fact about grief caused by loss bet money that grief is not going to be the only thing you gotta work on healing#humans brains are really funky about death especially when it happens spontaneously when you least expect it#Anyway reminder that self care and mental health is not linear there are days you think you're good and then you Find Out#but that's okay#so yeah this was supposed to be a quick warm up doodle for another drawing but I ended up messing around with it and now its a thing#I did find a new way of sketching I think I like so we'll see how it goes#been busting out the solid 3px pen I used to used back in 2018 when I started drawing art for the series that's been fun#god bless tags man great for yappers
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And another gift for the Laicion nation (aka, me and three other people... or maybe more? The latest one got a little bit of traction :)
I had this illustration commissioned for my werewolf AU Laicion fic (still a WIP, I expect to at least be done with the outlining and character studies this summer). A big thank you to @cecikiwi for this beautiful piece! I'm happy I made you discover Dungeon Meshi through this commission!
Some elements of the story already changed, and they will certainly still change as my understanding of the characters deepens and the plot develops.
Also, if you're coming across this and wondering "what fic?", let me redirect you to this post. I was very happy to see so much enthusiasm for it!
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#lycion#laicion#rarepair#something something gotta take things into your own hands and create content for your rare ships ahahaha#Ceci thanks again for this!! I especially like Laios' hand. That's a very good hand. The expressions are great too! My guys...#finals are coming up so I won't have the time to work on the fic until mid-June which is unfortunate#description in alt text#Fy posts
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K2 for echorexfives? 👀
Rex would like a refund on his ARCs. Or a nap. Either is fine.
Just imagine for the second one that Rex is on an official holo call or something XD
Help me get back into sketching through some of these polyam/platonic pose prompts :3 (I'm still slowly doing these, they help powering through this little artistic crisis I'm suffering rn)
#There is a Hungarian saying/expression that would be so very accurate for this little drawing both in meaning and visuals#but the best translation I can figure for it is “you are getting too big for their britches”#except when someone complains that you're “growing on to someone's head” it implies that you're a cheeky little shit#AND getting too tall for your own good too#hence why it would fit A LOT BETTER#I couldn't stop thinking about this little detail; impromptu hungarian lesson over#captain rex#arc trooper echo#arc trooper fives#clone trooper fives#echo#fives#tcw fanart#sw tcw fanart#my art#I'm working on my expressions#same face syndrome? I don't know her#answers#insertmeaningfulusername#poly sketches
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Drew this absolute silliest picture of Aziraphale
Based on this
#I laugh so I don’t cry#I needed to cheer up and looking at this face for an hour while I drew it worked#I love his expressions#he’s so exuberant#I love him#aziraphale#good omens#ineffable husbands#good omens fanart#aziracrow#gomens#aziraphale fanart
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i hc that baby siffrin had their gender on LOCK, figured the fuck out, extremely happy with their presentation and sense of self and any physical transition plans! and then when he forgot the island he forgot his gender too and it's been a much longer and shakier path figuring it out again </3
#and ofc it's different now than it was before. they're a whole different person now shaped by entirely different experiences#i think to me... he ends up w something somewhat adjacent to baby sif's gender#but very different in the details of how they express it and what makes them feel comfortable#and i think he settled into something that definitely works for him atm pre-canon#but once they feel more secure they're able to care a little more in a good way and start having fun w it!#thoughts#thoughts about siffrin#isat#siffrin
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Gotham: Holy shit there's a random animal running around Gotham city and no one's ever caught it before. They say it only appears in thunderstorms and anyone unfortunate enough to cross paths with it look as if they've been hit by thunder.
Dan phantom, the 'random animal' who is in fact a Raiju in question: If I destroy this place I'll be fucked over by Clockwork. But if I don't destroy this place I'll keep being followed by this brat.
Damian Wayne, the brat in question: There is an animal roaming Gotham in thunderstorms, father. We must save it!
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#raiju dan phantom#Just so you know#He's been kicked to another universe by Clockwork so he could express good behavior in a place that would be better equipped to handle him#If he decides to throw another world ending tantrum that is#Dan isn't that evil anymore because he went through the magic of *sparkles* therapy *sparkles* with Clockwork#He would still try to straight up kick Danny into the curve as soon as he sees him though so Clockwork forbade the two from interacting#Which works extremely well considering they're in separate universes an allat#Dan is feeling very offput by constantly being followed by this random child#Damian is hellbent on finding and rescuing this poor animal who only appears in thunderstorms#He does not give af if it's taller than a grown man he still wants to give it a good home#The batfam be wondering if this is a meta animal or one more magically inclined
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ive been convinced to post this silly shitpost comic that i drew to make myself feel better while on muscle relaxers
#this has nothing to do with the 100 xigbar challenge#(check out the 100 xigbar challenge tag on my blog to learn more!!)#this is just a bonus for meeeeeeeeee#the joke is dumb and kinda dated but i did a good job with the expressions so it balances out#also lets be real its in character for xigbar ''as if'' kingdomhearts to use dated internet terminology#working on the challenge has definitely made me looser and more comfortable with expressions and poses and such#its been great fun :o)#kh#xigbar#kingdom hearts#my art
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I met the me who made different choices
#idk what this means so dont ask#got the words stuck in my head and this is what I wanted to draw for it immediately#me at my desk. so.#I dont look exactly like this obviously. doesnt matter. anyways#hard time recently in a lot of different ways#lots of work to do!#given up on getting everything done I kind of failed at that. it was too much#so now I'm just trying to get anything done that will make the next 6 months not kill me again#ideally. 3 episodes. or the book#or like at least close enough to that that its basically that#I'm feeling really screwed LOL#I dont know how I've been working every day for so long and still havent done enough...#(its because the work load is way too much)#every time I take 1 hour for myself. to cook. or clean. or draw something else. or play a game. I feel so guilty auauau#I hate webtoon I hate this damn green app...#DOESNT MATTER!!!#what DOES matter is my art is good as hell... look at this shit...#the light. the colors. I love you red I love you green#I need to get more red pants I only have the one pair.#I saw this guy with red pants that had skeleton legs on them and I was like FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! I need them!!!!#I need to start sewing again. I dont have a sewing machine cause my apartment is too small so I havent sewn in years but I really want to..#I want to make clothes again... I need some vests I need some dresses..#I will not make pants or sleeved shirts because I dont hate myself#sketch#art#vent art I guess LMFAO its not#its just this fun little thing we like to call self expression#also this isnt how my desk setup actually is I scooted things around cause I didnt wanna draw anything twice. fuck it we ball#ok back to work
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#we spoke of this a LOT at work after that one tech was murdered and hidden in a wall
hi!👋 hello! kedreeva! i’m going to need to ask you to explain this!!!!
So back in 2009, a lab student named Annie Le was murdered at Yale university. Cameras saw her going on into a building, but not out again and it was like, the eve of her wedding (or close to? I don't remember) so clearly she had places to be and people waiting for her so they immediately started looking and the next day (or so? Anyway on the day of her wedding) they found her body in a recess in a wall, down in the areas where the research animals were kept. It turns out, a tech had killed her, but since there were cameras like EVERYWHERE, he just, I guess, left her there. Well, hid the body where it was. I don't remember how they caught him, but they did. It was a horrifying story. It still is.
And it was a huge news story among the folks at my workplace because, at the time, I was working at a different university, as an animal husbandry technician. As you can imagine this was a kind of intense time to be in that situation. They started offering, like, I'm not gonna say counseling but it was "if you need to talk we would prefer you talk to us about something wrong rather than kill anyone about it" and as techs (even if we were not even the same kind of tech, the killer was a lab tech and we were husbandry techs but I think a lot of people assumed it had been a husbandry tech since she was in an animal area), we were kind of getting the side eye from lab people for weeks afterwards. Like they thought we were gonna go "wow that's a fantastic idea, you're next!" or something, idk. And I mean like, people would freeze when you were alone in a hallway, or turn and walk the other way, or duck into the nearest room and watch you walk past, and they were all being super nice/civil to us when they did have to interact. It was very atypical behavior for lab people. Like not all of them, some of them had always been nice and weren't worried, but some of the people who had been unbelievable dicks previously were walking on eggshells. And the people who had friends in other universities reported this was happening at their jobs, too.
And instead of talking to The Man (because all the higher ups were garbage at the time), we just. talked among ourselves. It was a lot of "I may say I feel like strangling lab people sometimes when they do things that drive me up a wall but I don't MEAN it you know that right" and it also led to group discussions of what would be a theoretical *better* solution to hiding a body than what happened, with clear disdain for doing things like hiding bodies in walls, which is a terrible idea and one we would never do (looking at the people who think we might have decided this was a great idea actually).
Which consequently led to a lot of supervisors and/or managers that happened to overhear us bringing us donuts or arranging pizza for lunch in like, some kind of bid to help us feel appreciated, I guess, so that we wouldn't murder anyone, even though none of us were going to do that anyway. But also none of us were in a position to turn down free donuts or pizza or whatever.
And then after a few weeks, maybe a month or so, people just kind of forgot and moved on and things went back to normal like fifty people hadn't spent every lunch hour for weeks talking quietly among themselves about how human bodies would definitely fit into a carcass disposal barrel or that you'd have to crush hip bones and/or skulls before incineration. Hypothetically.
Like I said, it was a VERY weird time to be at my job, and every time I remember it happening feels like a fever dream. I can't even imagine what it was like at Yale.
#stories about Ked's life#anon asks#asks#i can't properly express the anxiety that went along with this whole time period#but you must understand#we worked alone#i worked alone in a locked room for 8 hours a day#with headphones on#i saw maybe 1-3 lab people for a few minutes on any given day#though often none#our supervisors weren't supervising Shit#and all the other techs were also locked in their rooms alone#And the lab people were acting weird#and the supervisors were acting weird#and the other techs were acting weird#and it's not like it happened to us so why is everyone so freaked out#and the answer no one wanted to say was that there wasn't really a good reason#why it wasn't us#except that it happened not to be#at which point things get weird
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i think the turning point in my life both academically and professionally was realizing that. If you Go First, be it a presentation or an interview or whatever. If you go first, you are being judged based on NOTHING but yourself. They aren't comparing you to anyone else, you don't have an act to "follow". You are the Bar. You can literally just do the best you can and at that point it will automatically be the best they've seen so far. And once you're done you're done. You can mentally and emotionally check out.
Game changer insofar as being stressed about presenting because now I just bulldoze over everyone else to go first like a feral hog.
#its true though#all my anxiety about presentations got reduced SIGNIFICANTLY once I started fighting to be first#its Good Advice#this actually especially applies to people with unfinished work like#girl you do not want to watch 9 people with complete presentations go and then give your speech#just jump on that grenade early before they've had time to be impressed by anyone#and the fallout wont be NEARLY as bad#and then its over right away#also if youre a smug petty bitch like me#you can absolutely blow the performance out of the water#and bask in the absolutely traumatized expressions of everyone who has to go after you now#if im gonna be the bar im going to set it at the ceiling#sorry#so i guess the next lesson is you have to fight to be before Me and those Like Me#rip
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