#good HEAVENS coming up with her screen name was a nightmare

[thesamecoiin]

⌨️ :: internet dating at the holidays? super cliche. except maybe not so much when you realize who's waiting 'in the red sweater' at the mall food court. (reversed!) written for @lcfthaunted

This was a terrible idea.

There were no two ways about it. Was she out of her mind?

Sorcha checked the time on her phone again. Exactly two minutes later than it had been two minutes before, the last time she’d checked, imagine that. She let the screen go black even as she stared at the digital numbers, and did her best not to fidget with the device.

“Excuse me,” a voice over her shoulder said.

Her head snapped up and she turned towards the sound, but it was only a father trying to get past her with an oversized stroller. She stepped aside. “Of course, sorry,” she said with a small smile.

She looked at her phone again (a whole 60 seconds had gone by), mostly checking for a notification this time. Despite how well the last few weeks had been going, she still half expected him to cancel.

That train of thought only brought her back around to the fact that this might be the worst idea she’d ever had. Tapping on the ad for the app had been bad enough, but this? She sighed and unlocked her phone, opening the conversation tab of the app and scrolling back to the very beginning. Maybe rereading some of their conversation would remind her why exactly she’d thought this was a good idea in the first place.

She smiled to herself. Neither of them had been comfortable when they’d first started talking, and looking back at it now, it practically radiated off the text. She could remember how it had felt. Online dating had never really been something she thought she’d ever do. After all, most apps of the sort seemed geared only towards hooking up and, well.

She could find someone for that just fine on her own, thank you very much.

Something about the ad for this app, however, had grabbed her attention. It advertised real connections over hookup culture. Given that she’d had maybe one connection she’d actually thought was real in her entire life, it appealed to her. Something deeper than a one night stand or a short-lived friends with benefits sounded really good, actually. So she’d tapped through, installed the app, built herself a profile. The fact that they discouraged sharing photos was a new one, but she found it almost refreshing, somehow.

Put simply, she was used to being able to draw people in based on her looks. Sure, she had the intellect and the conversation skills to go along with her body and her face, but intellect and conversation skills had rarely been more than icing on the cake. In truth, the idea of trying to build any kind of connection based on nothing more than black and white text? Mildly terrifying. Not that she’d admit that, even if pressed.

She swiped through the conversation on her screen, skimming over the majority of their conversation until she landed at the plans they’d made for that day.

gildedlily21: I’ll be in the northwest end of the food court, red sweater.

mjrnchurch: I’ll keep an eye out.

gildedlily21: ;)

So here she was. Standing there, red sweater and all, waiting for someone she’d never seen before in her life. What could possibly go wrong?

Another voice spoke behind her. “Excuse me… I’m looking for someone who calls herself gildedlily21, I’m supposed to meet her here.”

She took a breath, realizing she'd heard that voice before. She turned, looking up into a face she would never have expected. “...Wait, really?”

[yukidragon]

Can we have a one shot of Jack having a nightmare of MC marrying someone else, saying that they don't love him anymore and banishing Jack back in his VHS prison. Only to wake up with an empty bed causing more panic. But MC's just in the bathroom getting ready for the day.

You know, between this ask, and this absolutely heartbreaking picture by my good friend @illary-kore, I've been inspired. I say it's high time for Jack to get some comforting, and I'm going to use my specific MC Alice for it. Sound good? Awesome~

A reminder to everyone that Something's Wrong with Sunny Day Jack is an Adults Only fandom. Mature topics will be discussed, mostly in the form of psychological horror, body horror, angst, trauma, and a hint of spice. I hope you all enjoy this flashfic draft of painful nightmares and healing fluff.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

...

Alice was gone. Jack couldn’t feel her anymore. Desperately, he sought out any trace of her warmth, but all he felt was the hauntingly familiar cold numbness that grated on his senses and wore them away until there was nothing but static and an endless, empty pain.

No, no, no, no, no! Not again!

The gunshots, the screams, the crying, the pain… Jack felt that endless cycle of agony and death creeping in on his senses. It consumed him until the warmth he felt from Alice almost seemed like a lie, a delusion of heaven he created to escape hell.

Alice! Please, no… Alice! Sunshine! Help me! Save me! Alice!

Jack reached out for the barest whisper of warmth. Maybe he was just imagining it. Maybe he was deluding himself again, but that didn’t matter. He needed to find her. He needed her.

Alice!

There was a wall of ice so cold that his hands immediately felt numb when he touched it, even through his gloves. Vaguely, Jack remembered this feeling - a glass screen, a window that showed him his first glimpse of sunshine in forever. He slammed his hands against the glass blindly, screaming Alice’s name until his voice cracked and broke.

Faintly, through the static, Jack saw something to form. It was hazy, and only his left eye worked. He could feel the empty socket where his right eye used to be, weeping blood and tears down his face. He squinted his only remaining eye as he called out desperately for his sunshine.

Finally, he saw her, Alice wasn’t alone.

He was with her, the liar who tricked his sunshine and toyed with her heart. Ian was dressed like him - the new Sunny Day Jack… or rather the “only” Sunny Day Jack. He was a mockery of the original, redesigned and repackaged for a new generation that weren’t allowed to ever know that he was nothing more than a copy. He was a lie that would ensure everyone forgot the truth.

“Oh, Sunshine,” Ian said, his voice barely audible through the haze of static. “Alice, I knew you would choose me. We’re meant to be together… We were always meant to be together.”

“Jack…,” Alice said in a sigh that Jack barely heard, but she wasn’t talking to him. That name spoken so sweetly and with such a fond expression on her face was directed at the fake who held her close. “I love you.”

Alice! That’s not me! He’s not me! I’m the real Sunny Day Jack! Look at me! Don’t leave me here! Please! You can’t replace me with him too! Not you too!

 The kiss they shared was a rusty dagger gouging through his heart. Jack cried out, but his voice never reached them. They turned and walked away from him, slowly disappearing into the haze of static.

Alice! Please! Come back! You promised! You promised you’d never forget me! You promised we’d be together forever!

They were gone. Alice was gone… and Jack knew deep down in his soul that she was never coming back.

Please… Alice… my sunshine… What did I do wrong?

The despair was suffocating, the cold overwhelming, and the numbness that dissolved his senses and refused to let him ever find rest was maddening. Jack could do nothing but scream without a voice in the static and his memories of death and sunshine.

“Jack? Jack, wake up.”

Jack woke up gasping for air as if he was still capable of drowning, his body covered in a faint sheen of sweat. The cold numbness was still carved into his bones, but a glorious, beautifully familiar warmth caused it to recede back into the depths of his nightmares. His eyes - both of them - came into focus on his shaking hands that clasped tightly around two very familiar pale ones. He looked up to see Alice leaning over him, her brow knit and her pale blue eyes filled with worry. Although it was dark in their bedroom, it was nothing like the endless void he had been trapped in, and he saw his sunshine perfectly.

“Are you okay?” Alice asked. “You sounded like you were in pain an-”

Jack struck with the quickness of a cobra and snatched up Alice into his arms, who squeaked in surprise as she suddenly found herself pinned to the bed underneath him. His body, so much bigger and bulkier than hers, was a cage that surrounded her, securing her in place against him and refusing to ever let her go.

“Alice,” Jack said, his voice hushed and haunted. “Don’t go. Don’t forget me, please.”

It was difficult for Alice to make out his expression, as his hair and the way he loomed over her cast his face in shadow, but she could feel Jack shivering against her body. His breath was irregular, a bit ragged, and she could feel hot puffs of it against her cheeks. His hold was secure, but delicate, as though he was afraid that she would shatter into dust and slip between his fingers if he wasn’t careful enough.

Despite being trapped, Alice worried more about what was wrong with Jack than the position she was in. She could practically feel how much he needed her in that moment, and her heart went out to him. She brought her hand up to his cheek and he nuzzled into it immediately. He murmured her name and his breath tickled against her skin, sending a shiver up her spine.

“Jack…,” Alice said, her voice soft and soothing. “It’s okay. I’m right here. I won’t forget you, not ever.”

As the fear slowly began to recede, Jack became more aware of what he was doing and grew self-conscious about how he must’ve looked to Alice right now. This wasn’t behavior fitting of Sunny Day Jack. He needed to present only the best to his sunshine if he didn’t want to lose her. He looked away from her, growing bashful as he fumbled for a recovery, some way to smooth things over with that classic Sunny Day Jack charm that won over an entire nation, but Alice spoke first.

“Did you have a nightmare?” she asked gently, her eyes soft and focused only on him.

A nightmare. Of course. Jack almost felt stupid now for how he was reacting. Of course Alice wouldn’t leave him for some cheap imitation, or for that awful ex who toyed with her heart. How could he believe otherwise?

“Y-yeah… it was… It was just a nightmare,” Jack said, more to himself than Alice. He tried to shake off these feelings that were uncharacteristic of the Sunny Day Jack, giving his sunshine his sunniest smile as he let out a small laugh that came out more strained than he would’ve liked. “L-looks like I spooked myself pretty good, huh? But dreams can’t hurt us since… since they’re only our imagination running away with us while we sleep.” Reluctantly, he shifted so that he lay beside Alice in a more casual position, though he couldn’t bring himself to let her go. “I hope I didn’t give you a scare too, sunspot.”

Alice moved along with Jack so that she stayed close, hooking one of her legs around his despite the fact that it was obvious he wasn’t going anywhere. She wanted to make sure that he knew that she wasn’t going to leave him alone. “I’m more worried about you right now.” She slowly stroked the edge of his strained smile and felt the tension in his cheek. “Are you okay?”

“I’m swell as a bell, sunshine,” Jack said, his smile coming a bit more easily now. “As groovy as a smoothie. I just…” He forced out a small chuckle that was almost genuine. “I guess I got a little caught up in the moment, but it’s nothing some sweet dreams with good company won’t fix.”

Alice furrowed her brow. She could tell that Jack was trying to mask how he felt, which only made her concern for him grow. He had been fine earlier, when she snuck out of his arms and their bed to use the bathroom. Her “business” took longer than she would’ve liked, and at some point she had a bad feeling that something was wrong, which was only confirmed when she returned to the bedroom.

Jack had been a terrible sight, his body contorted and tangled in the sheets, his face twisted with panic and desperation. He croaked out her name and half-mumbled pleas that broke her heart. His hands weakly groped at the sheets until she snatched them up to hold as she roused him awake.

Alice could see the fear still haunting his dark eyes despite his attempts to soften it for her sake, making her heart ache for him all the more.  “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Oh, no, I don’t think that’s really necessary,” Jack said quickly. “It’s just a dream, and dreams can’t hurt us because they’re not real. They don’t ever have to be real…”

That last sentence was spoken under his breath, obviously not meant for Alice to hear, but she caught it all the same. “Yeah, I know that,” she said, “but that doesn’t mean they can’t make us feel bad. If something’s bothering you, I want to help.”

Jack hesitated, his resolve wavering in the light of his sunshine’s concern for him. He knew that he had to be perfect for her, to show only his best sides to her, but he could feel how much she ached to help him. A guilty part of him craved that feeling, especially when he could remember just how cold it was without her in his nightmare. “I… I don’t… I-I mean I appreciate it, sunspot, really, but I just…”

The feeling of Alice combing her fingers through his hair made it difficult for Jack to focus on his excuses, and his rambling eventually trailed off. She touched him so gently, stroking his head and drawing him even closer to her. She closed her eyes as she rested her forehead lightly against his, making him just that much more aware of her softness and warmth. He breathed her in, relishing in that familiar combination of sugar cookies, vanilla cupcakes, and something else that was distinctly Alice.

“I love you, Jack,” Alice said, her tender words sending a jolt through Jack that caused his heart to flutter. “You’re my partner, and my best friend. I’m here for you… whether you’re okay or not.”

Jack recognized the words that he told to her once upon a time, back when she was still hiding her pain from him, too afraid to let him or anyone else see her weakness. It made him waver. A part of him wanted to break down, to collapse into her arms and just unleash all those terrifying tangled up feelings twisted up inside his heart, but those feelings were too big, too horrible for him to even think about. How could he ever dare to risk crushing her under the weight of everything he had been through? How could he dare risk chasing her away showing her anything less than the very best version of himself?

He couldn’t go back to that hell. He could never risk losing his sunshine.

When it was clear that Jack was reluctant to speak, Alice continued in a gentle voice. “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it.” She leaned back just enough that she could kiss his forehead. “Just don’t force yourself to pretend you’re okay when you’re not. I’m not going anywhere.”

Jack closed his eyes and savored the feeling of her lips on his skin. Alice pressed soft kisses all across his face, making sure no spot was left feeling unloved. She finished by meeting his lips with hers, and he was only too eager to return the kiss to show his love in return.

When Alice eventually drew back to end the kiss, Jack couldn’t help but give chase, snatching up just one more quick peck before he could regain enough self-control to let her catch her breath. She looked up at him with a lopsided smile and lightly tapped his nose. “I love you whether you’re okay or not, starlight.”

Those words were his undoing. Although Jack desperately refused to break, in that moment he allowed himself to bend. “I love you too, sunshine… more than you’ll ever know.”

Alice offered Jack a lopsided smile. “Well then, I guess I’ll have to stick around if I want to find out just how much you love me,” she teased lightly.

Jack chuckled softly. “Nothing would make me happier, Alice.”

Alice drew him in closer, and Jack allowed her to guide him to rest his head on her chest. Her heartbeat thrummed against his ear along with her breaths, as her soft warmth cradled him and her sweet smell made her so much more aware of her. She was so close, her soft curves so tempting. He could drown himself in her, in that intense love and desire that came when their bodies meshed just perfectly together.

It was so tempting; they were both barely dressed. Alice was wearing only his shirt and a pair of panties while Jack had only his boxers on. It would be all too easy for him to just tear their clothes away and make love to his sunshine until he forgot everything but her name.

It was tempting, but Jack hesitated. This moment between them felt intimate in a way that was different than lovemaking but just as powerful, and he wanted to savor it just a little while longer.

That was when Alice began to sing, startling Jack. It was a song that he didn’t recognize, something soft and soothing, likely a lullaby. He was so taken aback by hearing her sing for him that the words failed to register at first, and all he could focus on was the warmth of her voice washing over him.

Eventually Jack caught the lyrics as well. It was a sweet song, one that promised that no matter what storms may rage or tears may fall, she would stay with him, and everything would be fine in the morning.

Her voice was beautiful, and the song Alice sang was sweeter than anything Jack had ever heard before. He melted into her, and his heart squeezed every time she repeated that she would be there with him, tonight and tomorrow. He keenly felt just how much she loved him, the warmth of her love filling him up like nothing else ever could. He made sure to share his love and gratitude in return, wanting to make her feel just as special and loved as she did for him. He would have said as much, but he didn’t dare interrupt this private concert that she sang only for him.

Instead, Jack silently thanked God for finally allowing an angel to save him from hell and bring him to this heaven made from their love. More than God, he thanked Alice for finding him, saving him, and loving him just as much as he loved her.

[vinxwatches]

watching good omen season 1

ep 1 pilot

haven't seen a lot of it, mostly that people like it, that it's made by people people really like and that it's gay (or at least people make it gay) so you know, good pick for me. and i just watched to animations/animatics on youtube with bad endings and bad endings fuck me up, so hopefully this is happier. intro is a fucking banger. also god has a fem voice? nice. accurate skin colour for the earliest humans. not surprised, but appreciated. making fun of theology and great banter? i love it.

ominous picnic basket. oh... actually quite biblically fitting it seems. i REALLY hope they don't expect me to remember these names too well. many of the characters seem fun though.

of course the american politician says bs like "a regular y chromosome son". which i'm sure has not been tested as you 1: don't know the gender yet. 2: phenotype does not denote genotype.

i wonder who and how they'll figure out who has the wrong baby. "i don't recall what horror of history we had a lunch over, but i do recall what we had." the BEST dynamic.

will they even figure out they got the wrong one? ok, i know that working with an actual 5 year old would be a nightmare... but that kid is like 12.

well done making both heaven and hell look like shit. do you want grime overpopulating or empty, liminal, office spaces?

brilliant end of episode 1.

ep 2 the book

damn the forces of hell are so bloody rude and evil. and so many quick jokes.

question: what are the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse supposed to be in christianity? both biblically and in modern belief? they are separate from devils and angels.

i love a witch that also uses an ipad in her rituals.

"sorry, right number" seriously the humour in this show is so brilliant. i really hope the story is able to match it.

ep 3 hard times

a black knight shrugging is way too funny. i love these two. just two old friends helping each other out, it's just that that's diametrically opposing one another. the angel doing some tempting, the demon some miracles. and upper management doesn't care.

awh, they are just so cute together.

excuse me you are playing intro now? 28 minutes in? that's not an intro. that's a bloody intermission!

they really succeed at making heaving seem so extremely bad. extremely wide shot or extreme close-up. it's so incredibly uncomfortable.

the prime minister has a nice flat chested fucker in his bed.... good for him if he's not cheating.

"mend it all"/"end it all" whispers. really neat.

ep 4 saturday morning funtime

of course he was condemned for nothing more then asking questions.

ah, they got rid of pestilence to replace them with pollution. it's a good change, but feels pretty pre 2020.

oh no, i find his death so sad. he had a love, why kill him? i know the apocalypse is coming but still.

i still really hope that the presidents son turns out to be trans to just break the things he said at the start. then again it wouldn't really work as it's not the kids he said it about. idk, i guess i hope of screen son turns out to be trans to spite the person that'll never know... yea i'm holding out hope for something that doesn't matter.

azi being send to heaving is SO bad. his bookshop possibly burning down is emotionally worse. it was going to be the last episode of the day. but i started watching because i couldn't deal with bad endings, so i guess i'll have to watch one more.

ep 5 the doomsday option

Azi going full rogue (finally).

man that's the most obvious cold reading ever.

the guard reads a neil gaymen book. cute.

sir... your car is... more then a little on fire.

ep 6 the very last day of the rest of their lives

are we doing a flash back episode for the last episode of the season?

oh, please let him rebuild the car just like i want the bookshop rebuild?

the way to defeat the end of the world is to believe and stand (and i hope work) for a world that wouldn't end. a bit on the nose but very nice.

and of course with Terry Pratched being involved death is not to be defeated, just not hastened along.

a kid not doing the one thing they were supposed to do.... there's a trans/gay message in there. also That's Just What Kids Do! you wanted an 11 year old to do what they were told? that's the first part of the problem.

for a TV series that's a pretty good satan. oh that is SO clever. kind of time fucking, but not really so long as you never introduce time travel so it's only true from now on. oh, is it a nicer ending then i though? YES IT IS! \o/

it "ends" as it starts: with a garden and an apple. ok, make it more explicit why don't you.

oh, you subtle bastards. i love it. other scene's now make more sense too, oh how i love it.

ok, yea it makes sense people go wild over this as it's really bloody great.

[sanguinerot]

NPC’S: Iosef

The first nonhostile npc we encounter in Bloodborne 2 comes only shortly after we first arrive in Elpium and encounter Nicehis the Flenser. Whether she slays your character or you manage to defeat her and later get pushed into the Flooded Chapel by Leogan, you are immediately brought to a dark screen as your character loses their life, and you are faced with the fist of many “YOU HAVE DIED”’s.

As the black screen slowly fades into a cutscene, the sound of dripping water can be heard, and a distinctly masculine voice greets you in apathy.

> “Ah. Good Nicehis sends her regards once again. Come then, and partake. Let your newfound hunger guide you.”

The scene gradually comes into focus, revealing your character in what seems to be a flooded cistern, on their hands and knees in the water. Though the water is dark, the area around them it is tinged with a vivid, bloody red. The camera follows the red up the side of an altar, where blood spills down and into the flooded chamber below.

On that altar lies Iosef. A dark haired man decked in near pristine holy robes, laying flat on his back atop the stone altar in an area that the game will helpfully inform you post cutscene is called the Flooded Chapel. Iosef has no limbs to speak of, though his clothing, with its empty sleeves folded carefully over his chest and the trousers tied off at the legs, suggests that he once did. Pure white in color and adorned with gold thread and lavish gems of a deep amethyst hue, his garb suggests that he is a clergyman with a high position. Yet here he lies in a crumbling chapel, seemingly abandoned.

The only blemish to break the illusion of his pristine status is the wound in his side, which appears in game to be a large gash from which blood seems to flow in an endless, free stream down into the waters below the altar upon which he lies. As your character stands, the cutscene pans back to show the rest of the Flooded Chapel. Above Iosef’s altar is a headless statue of what seems to be a large, six armed creature draped in coarse fabric. Two of the arms grasp at either side of the altar, whilst the other four are raised to the heavens above and the hole you previously fell into the Flooded Chapel through.

Behind the statue, piles of corpses prove that you are but one of many who have been flung down below.

Here, the cutscene ends, and if the player lingers long enough, or interacts with Iosef, he has the following to say.

> “Hm? What’s this? You’ve your wits about you still? Ha.. [laughter that begins slow and builds up heartily, almost to the point of hysteria] hahaha…I see. You’re an unlucky one then. Not from around here, either. The name’s Iosef.

> “Well. I’ve no idea what nightmares have called you to Elpium, but you won’t survive here long as you are. Not to worry, I still have my uses. Venture forth, and bring me the echoes that linger in the blood of those above. I shall make them into a fine feast for you. A proper Hunter needs be fed, after all.”

If the character interacts with him again, the following dialogue triggers.

> “Oh? Yes, worried about going to face the night unarmed? Worry not. Surely you see the other gifts Nicehis has brought me. A great deal of them were better prepared than you, for all the good that it did them. See if you can’t find something you like.”

Iosef serves the same function as the Doll in Bloodborne, turning blood echoes into power to fuel your characters level ups. The animation for this action is your character dipping their hand into the floe of blood that spills off Iosef’s altar and bringing it to their mouth, presumably in order to drink it. By feeding Iosef Blood Echoes, you therefore empower his own blood, which you can then consume to empower yourself. This suggests that in some way, Iosef is a catalyst for the power of blood.

Upon leveling up with Iosef for the first time, he says the following.

> “No need to be squeamish, come now and sup your fill. There is power in transfusions like this, don’t let anyone fool you.”

Further level ups with Iosef prompt one of two dialogues.

> “Very well, you may Partake.”

> ”Partake in thy sacrament, for your own well-being.”

For now, Iosef’s origin, his relationship to Nicehis, and a large amount of his lore remains a mystery, but this first string of early interactions proves promising.

Bloodborne2Updates will update when further information is available.

[echantedtoon]

A Bloom In Time Ch30 Meeting The Moonjumper

Red hair of flaming rose. Blue eyes of sparkling ocean. Red freckles falling across her face like delicate flower petals. And the voice strong enough to rival a banshee and shatter his ears if he still had any after he died.

But nevermind that. It was all there...RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF HIM!! She matched the woman from his memory to a t. Poppy. Poppy Rose Bloomington. A name that was just as sweet as the flowers that bloomed in her name and with a personality to match. Pale blue claws fazed their way through the glass and grabbed onto thin air it seemed as the glitching monstrousity pulled his head through tilting it sideways with a wide fanged smile that could rival a wolf's and eyes redder than blood that glowed like the creature from her nightmares! The metal clanging from the chains around his wrists only added to the overall creepiness of the monster. On top of his bodies unnatural twitching, like a glitching laptop screen. Jerking around and making him all more scarier. Moonjumper wasn't sure what he was thinking when he heard the impossibility of HER still being around and threw it into the back of his mind as he didn't want to gaze upon the past ever since that incident almost three months ago now, wanting to push any run off thoughts and worries away from his shaken self to recover and get back to some kind of normality and peace of mind. But it was incredible how one finds themselves revolving back around to old thoughts when you were all alone most of the time and decided to ask Timmy all he knew. Which was still vaugue at the time since dear Timmy hadn't really known a lot about her either, so even if it was underhanded....It just became too much after a while of being alone with the wondering and the curiousity eating at him, he finally relented and decided to take action. Getting Timmy to agree to ask about her and to do it discreetly to avoid suspicion from the Snatcher of course. Who know what he'd do if he found out about this? What Timmy brought back to tell him...What darling Hattie and Bow oh so innocently filled him in on, and what Timmy repeated back to him...It lined up perfectly more and more he thought about it, and more and more the curiousity in him grew. After all, this was his lost friend he was talking about. His very best friend. Poppy had always been there for him thick and thin through the good and the bad times he had with Vanessa. And he thought she was lost forever during the great frost but-....Now here she was. In the flesh and blood. Perfectly healthy and safe, and ALIVE!! He knew he probably shouldn't be here doing this, but the curousity became too much ti bare. He HAD to know if she was ok and here. He had to know if the only friend he ever had during that dark time was alright. Moonjumper never meant to be seen. Good pecking heavens NO!! The rage and power Snatcher would probably have fueling his protective nature for their friend would've been too much for him to face alone. But-

 And now that he was here, and saw her..And she saw him and reacted. There was no way he could just leave and not deal with Snatcher later. Absolutely no way. So the best thing he could do was come in and explain himself ...Yeah. It's not like that wouldn't scare her even more and cause her to stumble back and land on her behind, shuffling back more when the entity pulled himself all the way through and was now in the same once safe place floating in mid air. The ragged and torn jacket around his shoulders flew around if it wasn't glitching like it was being blown around by some unseen wind and the chains clamped onto his wrists floated as he came near. Clacking that eerie sound of his as he edged nearer with that smile of his. The panic and fear on Poppy's face increasing as he loomed over her. Heart pounding in her chest as the shadow from her nightmare with red eyes and claws coming back for her.

She screamed.

The shriek was quick and short but it echoed throughout the silent ship as sharp as a knife and it was shocking enough for Moonjumper to get him to stop mid air and the smile to be replaced by a look of shock. Taking the monster's shocked stillness as a chance to escape, Poppy quickly scrambled to her feet and ran off back towards the direction of the girls. Maternal instinct wailing for the safety of the children. 

"SNATCHER HELP!!"

She never  thought she could crawl so fast in her life but peck it! She dove through that tiny door like death itself was chasing after her and crawled a marathon faster than a train to the girls'. Who by now had been startled awake from the sudden wail and were blinking confused and scared, jumping when the grown woman came running in. Breathing heavily panting and looking like one of those damsels in distress in a horror movie. Obviously being freaked out freaked them out even more especially as she kept looking around wildly.

"What's  wrong Poppy?," Bow asked innocentlt wiping at her eyes.

But Poppy was too scared to move or do anything at the moment. She was panicking. What was she gonna do?! There was a monster on the ship and she had no way of knowing how dangerous it was! On top of that there was two little kids to worry about and she had ZERO clue as to how to get them outta here safely! She was panicking to the point it was starting to become hard to breath and think. The red eyes and shadows from her nightmares just in the other room and the cold was starting to creep up again on her to the point she had to lean on one of he bed posts for support. Goosebumps lined her arms from the cold and darkness seeping in from the walls around her and she only looked up when one shadow with hands loomed over her from behind and like in a horror story looked behind her to the monster from the window. Red eyes and chains clacking. Claws reaching for her terribly-  She screamed again. This time louder than the first two times and loud enough to make the two little girls wince back and cover their ears in pain from that. The Starella book left on the bedside table found itself being hurled at the glitching and twitching ghost's body as it was the first thing Poppy grabbed in her panicked state but completely passed through his body like a normal ghost. It hit the wall behind them with a thud before falling to the floor with another thud from the poor book she threw. Startling him for a moment in another phase of shock blinking.  

"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU MONSTER!!," She yelled at the thing and stumbled back against the nightstand. 

"Poppy, it's ME!!," Moonjumper pleaded to the red head looking guilty and holding up his hands in a non threatening gesture. "PHILIP!!"

Silence.

The blue eyes still stared at him and her chest heaved in and out quickly still staring at the constantly shaking and flinching creature before her as if he wasn't real and just a figment of her imagination, but the fact the two girls were also looking between them confused and obviously still half asleep was enough proof to see that he was indeed there floating in front of her. He didn't dare move in case provoking another scared reaction out of the lady or children but he was mostly focused on the woman standing before him. Both still silently stared for a few more painful moments that felt like hours but in reality it was a few minutes of tense staring between the two of them. Until Poppy finally blinked, a movement beyond her heavy breathing. 

"P-P-Philip?", she squeaked out. Barely over a whisper. It was super hard to catch but somehow this spirit managed to hear and he gave a gentle smile to her. 

"Y-Yes. Philip Snider. Y-You remember me right?" he leaned down more until he was eyes level still smiling despite her shuffling back a lil bit against the nightstand. "I bought flowers from you all the time for my Darling Vanessa. You remember don't you?" He lifted a hand towards her smiling steadily and as a friendly gesture. "D-Do you remember the last batch of flowers I bought from you?"

"Daises.." They both answered at the same time and Poppy paused. Moonjumper smiled even more now, the frightful haze falling away and despite his frightful and still very twitchy appearence remained friendly looking. Now that she got a good look past the fog she could make out all kinds of details on his. Red markings on his face in the form of red lines was connected from the bottom of his eyes and lead to the sides of his head and bottom of his chin. A monocule sat on his right eye and both said eyes were red as blood as shiny blueish white hair flowed down his shoulders, and a tattered torn coat waved from his body as well. ......This did NOT look like Philip, and a quite flash of doubt crossed her mind before disappearing as he spoke again....Or one of the girls.

"Uncle Moonjumper?," Hattie asked tilting her head as the ghost flinched and turned to them. Momentarily forgetting they were still present with the two adults. "What are you doing here? We haven't seen you for like a really long time."

......He gave a nervous smile to them both. "T-That's right. I-It's me. I just....needed to stop by see s-s-something for myself." His eyes glanced back over to Poppy who still stood frozen against the nightstand, making the candle lopsided behind her. 

.....Poppy shook her head. "N-No. No! Y-Y-You can't be Philip. " She pointed at him-....It-....The thing! "Ya'll look nothin' like him! He wasn't some....twitchy mess of ...What are y-ya exactly?"

He regarded Poppy for a long moment before sighing and reaching a hand up to rub at his head. Well...It was too late to back out now, and he'd come this far hasn't he. He turned fully to Poppy. "Well, yes. I admit I look nothing like I did when I was alive, but neither does my other half or any other ghost for that matter. Some of the one I've seen look very stranger....And you wouldn't be too far off on me not being the same Philip as you remember. I-...I-I actually go by Moonjumper now. "

"Moonjumper?," Poppy questioned raising a brow at him. What kind of name was that?...Well considering she new someone called Cookie and Snatcher, she couldn't really be judging others on names. And she still had no idea who this fella was besides claiming he was Philip....But...He knew the exact type of flowers she gave him on that fateful day and her. And he knew who Philip was and Vanessa. Instantly an assortment of questions bobbled up in her mind that she had no problem asking. "But Snatcher said Philip wasn't-...I mean-....Y-You're not him!"

Moonjumper, as he called himself now instead of Philip, tilted his still twitching head at her and blink. "I beg pardon, but Snatcher said what?"

Poppy's eyebrow raised further. "Snatcher said Philip wasn't around anymore, and I sure as peck would believe him over some....creature that chased me through the window!".....A sudden flash of realization flashed over her momemtarily before she asked. "Wait a sec. Do ya know him?"

Moonjumper stared at her. Snatcher.....had the audacity to tell Poppy that they weren't-...You had got to be PECKING me! Did he seriously tell her neither of them were her best friend from when they were alive all those years ago!? What ELSE had the infernal spook been telling her behind his back?! ..Or would it be their back in this scenario? BAH!! Doesn't matter. What did was that Snatcher was deliberatly lying to his friend and he wasn't going to stand by and let such important matters slip by such as this and wouldn't let misinformation about HIM and what happened to them of all people slip by because of some peckneck shadow!! Annoyance was clearly present on his face and Poppy got a small feeling of worry thinking she might've made the spook mad. Both girls just tiredly silently watched and exchanged confused glances to one another. 

Moonjumper huffed making Poppy flinch at the sound. "HA! That's rich coming from him! That halfling is lying right to your face!"

.....Poppy blinked. "W-What?"

Moonjumper smiled sweetly. "Why? Didn't dear Snatcher tell you?" He chuckled and gave a smile similar to Snatcher's smug one. "We're two halves of the same person.~ Split at death and now wondering through death two halves of the same person.~"

Poppy's eyes widened big and in shock not processing the words he said right. "W-What?"

"Oh! He didn't tell you did he?" He smiled and gestured to himself with a smile. "Well allow me to elaborate for you, my dear.~ Snatcher and I are both Prince Philip Snider Of the Kingdom of Subconette.~ When we died in the frozen celler we split personalities resulting in us becoming two very different ghosts. How I have no idea, but it's quite the sight isn't it?~"

Poppy's eyes widened even more as well as the girls as Moonjumper just willingly spilt all the information of their death out on the table like they were just talking about afternoon tea and the weather. 

".....No...NO!! T-THAT'S CRAZY TALK!! T-THERE'S NO WAY-"

"Are you sure about that?"

She just stared at him. Dead silent but a voice in the back of her head echoed that thought. Are you sure about that? She had been frozen, brought back to life by a ghost trying to get rid of another ghost who blamed her for stealing her man and cursed everyone to be frozen by a magical alien hour glass, seen talking penguins, owls, cats, traveled through space, walked on a spaceship, and said alien also happened to be said ghost's daughter. Can't get crazier than that! ..Ok maybe it can. But really. With EVERYTHING she had experienced so far was it too hard to beleive this could also be a possibility? A person being split in two upon death? Was such a thing even possible? Before she even got the thought process to speak a word Moonjumper paused. A strange buzzing of energy only he could feel was in the air and soon his confused expression turned into one of wide eyed worry!

"I have to leave!," he suddenly said making her snap outta it long enough to blink and finally find her words.

"Wait. Wha!? Y-Y-YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE NOW!! NOT AFTER EVERYTHIN' YA JUST SAID!!" She made an attempt to grab at him but her arm just passed right through him.

Moonjumper was worriedly looking around backing away a few feet. " I'm afraid I have no choice." He looked back to her quickly. " We'll meet again I promise! When's it's safe, I'll send Timmy to get you! Don't worry Hattie knows how to get to me! Until then don't seek me out and don't tell Snatcher!"

"WAIT!!"

She pushed herself of the nightstand arm outstretched in an attempt to stop him, but much in a way shattered glass would, the ghost broke into pieces before their very eyes and faded into nothing. Leaving Poppy to stop and stand there. Arm still outstrectched to where Moonjumper once was, now nothing but empty air and no ghost or Philip there. .....She blinked and lowered her arm a few inches after a few uncomfortable seconds of silence...But it wasn't for long, when suddenly there was an emergence of purple starting to crawl from her shadow and she gasped seeing the purple coloring extend from her shadow until it elongated from her and two yellow orbs and a toothy snarl came from it in the form of Snatcher. Fur standing on edge and ready to attack like how he looked on that day the Mafia Boss attempted to kiss her hand. Poppy on instinct backed away a few feet as Snatcher's head snapped back and forth, searching for anything that could be labled a threat here. He had felt a nagging feeling back in his forest, he was just sitting here trimming Rough Patch of his loose leaves to help take his mind off the events plauging his mind hopefull to just have peace for once when he felt it. A burning feeling of danger screeching loud and proud in front of him and nagging him in the direction upwards, and he knew one thing had happend. Poppy's soul binded to his magic was summoning him because of danger present. He couldn't have dropped the bushcat on the chair with a meow faster and teleported there to make sure she was safe and sound. After a few tense moments of him looking around and not detecting any threats, he calmed down, the fluff around his shoulders and hair smoothing back down to it's regular fluffiness and looked down to Poppy who was still staring at him and didn't move when he leaned down to give her a worried look. The girls still confused and tiredly looking at each other and watching.

"Are you alright?," He asked softly as if he was talking to the girls, "Why did you summon me?"

"I-...." Poppy opened her mouth and stopped herself....Staring at Snatcher (Philip).....No. NO. Not now. She couldn't bring herself to say anything. Not when she felt so drained and confused all of a sudden. Instead answering with. "I-...I had a nightmare."

He stared at her for a moment before sighing in relief and leaning back up. "*sigh* Not the first time I've had to deal with this kind of thing.....You want me to stay again?" He asked kinda hopeful of her answer for him.

".....Yes." She found herself saying without thinking and she blinked surprised at her answer.

Snatcher smiled and a light yellow dusted his cheeks and he sighed again. Thank goodness. Only a nightmare. He had to deal with plenty of those himself for sure. Patting her on the back, one of his clawed hands nudged Poppy forward towards the door and he floated towards the bed where Bow was yawning and blinking tiredly obviously not used to battling sleep this time of night.

"Go to sleep. I'll take care of them and meet you in the attic."

Moonjumper watched their movements from a safe distance away. In ABSOLUTE SHOCK at what he had just witnessed. Snatcher....Was....BLUSHING!!! The purple noodle's yellow blush was unmistakable to Moonjumper as he watched the other ghost treat Poppy as if she was a helpless damsel in distress and actually smiled, blushed, and offered to do her something without any conditions or catches.  Moonjumper always suspected there was a part of him that might've been in love with Poppy but he had no clue Snatcher would hold that part. Red eyes narrowed at the purple ghost with greed glinting in them. Too long...Too long to have something else he cared about slip away to that guy. He lost his family. His home. His beloved Vanessa. He was NOT about to lose his only friend to Snatcher too.

[trulyinspiringmovies]

Wendell & Wild

“Wendell & Wild” felt like it would be a match made in heaven, but ends up being overstuffed with half-baked ideas.

Kat Elliot was only eight years old when her parents died. Five years later, she’s out of juvey and still blames herself. She’s enrolled in an all-girls Catholic school as part of a program to give juvenile delinquents a second chance. There, she receives a mark on her hand and is told by two demons named Wendell and Wild that they can bring her parents back. All she has to do is summon them into the mortal world.

Henry Selick is arguably the main reason why I love horror and the macabre. He made “James And The Giant Peach”, which was one of my favorite movies to watch in my elementary school library. He’s made the iconic “The Nightmare Before Christmas”, which I’ve raved about in my review. He’s also made, one of my favorite movies of all time, “Coraline”, which was one of the first movies I ever reviewed. Combining him with one of my current favorite horror directors, Jordan Peele, felt like a dream come true. It’s the horror claymation I loved as a child mixing with the social commentary horror that I’ve come to love as an adult. Unfortunately, “Wendell & Wild” was disappointing to me. Let’s talk about the demons, Wendell and Wild. They’re voiced by Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele. Any chance at hearing Key & Peele again is welcome by me, but in this movie, they’re just not funny. It really felt like they weren’t allowed to inject their own humor into this because it’s a bunch of basic kids’ movie tropes. Kat is a fine character, but she isn’t very reactive to situations. She just kind of goes with the flow and doesn’t question all that much. She’s learning that demons and zombies are real and she doesn’t really seem to mind all that much. Her muted character is really at its worse when she finally gets to talk to her parents again and it doesn’t really feel all too special. It’s cool that Raúl had some casual trans representation in the movie, but other than that fact, he’s only there to do whatever the plot needs him to do in order to progress the story forward. The rest of the characters were bland as well. There’s this group of three girls that are all there to be supportive and don’t really add to the story at all. The main girl has some plot relevance, but she has her entire character arc off-screen, so she felt pointless too. There’s this Van Helsing-type character in a wheelchair who feels like he has an interesting backstory, but it’s never explored. His inclusion boils down to needing him to resolve the final conflict. I could go on, but this is the movie’s main weakness. There are too many half-baked characters that don’t really get explored all too much. Some of them look like they just finalized the rough drafts of their character design. Couple that with the fact that things just happen for no reason other than to progress the plot and you have a movie that ends up being unengaging, even when you want it to be. It’s such a shame too since claymation is an art form I absolutely adore and I try to support it whenever I can. But you can’t just have great claymation without a good story. Otherwise, all that hard work and effort go to waste because people won’t want to check the movie out.

★★★

Watched on October 30th, 2022

[dottielovegood]

ASMR - Chapter 4

Elriel fanfiction

About this fic:

Azriel can’t sleep Elain has an ASMR channel Match made in heaven (or you know, on youtube..)

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You can find chapter 1 here, chapter 2 here and chapter 3 here

Read this fic on AO3

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The following week, Azriel read Elain’s messages too many times to admit. He had answered her that “meat banjo” was, indeed, a vile word, and after that, they hadn’t really talked or texted.

He had saved her number as “Elain”, which had felt weirdly private. As if they were friends, which they were not. He was just her friendly helper, and she was his remedy for nightmares.

However, even though they didn’t know each other, Azriel felt an odd sensation in his chest when he thought about her. If he didn’t know better, he would have thought that he was missing her, which was absurd. But the tight little knot in his chest felt very much like longing. He tried to tell himself that this was weird and stupid. He knew that he had a crush on her (even though he hated to admit it), but he could also see that it was a pointless crush. She was an internet sensation, he was a boring IT guy. She was light and happiness and flowers, he was dark and brooding. She made people smile, he made people uncomfortable. And then there was the practical side of things. They had met on the internet. She probably lived on the other side of the country. Hell, she could even live in a different country for all he knew. She might have a partner already - it’s not like he asked. And, last but not least, she probably didn’t have a crush on him.

Before talking to her on the phone, he had just thought that she was a pretty girl that deserved kindness. But after their phone call, he had definitely developed a crush. Which was another reason why he hadn’t texted her. He didn’t want to bother her and he didn’t want to have this crush. He wanted to stop feeling like this for a girl he would never see in real life. Yet, every night before bed, he found himself on her youtube page, watching one of her many videos.

She uploaded a new video to Youtube every Friday, so when Friday came around, Azriel was itching to get home so he could go to sleep (he told himself that he was looking forward to sleeping and not to seeing her face).

However, he had an entire workday to get through first. The office was mostly an open landscape and Azriel’s desk was next to Cassian’s. The only person with his own office was Rhysand, which was fair since he was the owner of the company. At two in the afternoon, Rhys poked his head out of his office.

“You guys are still coming for dinner this weekend, right?”

“Yeah,” Azriel and Cassian answered in unison.

“I told Feyre that I would help her with the food,” Azriel continued.

Rhys looked like he was going to kiss Azriel. “Oh, god. Thank you, man. I was scared that we would have to repeat the Christmas dinner,” he said and shuddered.

Feyre hated to cook and Rhys did most of the cooking at home, but for some inexplicable reason, she always wanted to cook for holidays or family dinners. To everyone’s dismay. Christmas had been no exception. She had burned the turkey, added salt instead of sugar to the dessert and somehow managed to buy the wrong berries for her cranberry sauce. Luckily, Rhys had been prepared and bought a few frozen pizzas and some ice cream, so the day wasn’t that much of a disaster, but nobody wanted to brave Feyre’s cooking again.

“Why don’t you just cook?” Cassian asked without looking up from his screen.

“You know that she kicks me out if I so much as go near the kitchen when we have these family dinners. And since she started the hormone treatment, she has been a bit bitchy when she gets mad, so I’ll just do whatever she says.”

Azriel chuckled. He could tell from Rhysand’s tone that Feyre had been more than “a bit” bitchy.

“I don’t understand why she lets Azriel help, though…”

“Maybe because she knows that I’ll tell her to sit down with a glass of wine and a magazine, and then she can take all of the credit for the food?”

“Fair enough.” Rhys shrugged. “Just burn the food a little bit, or it won’t be believable.”

Cassian snorted. “No one would believe that something edible was made by your wife. Sorry.”

“She does make a great green smoothie, though,” Rhys grinned and held up his glass.

Azriel and Cassian looked at each other and had to bite their tongues to keep from laughing. The smoothie looked vile and smelled even worse.

After a few more minutes of small talk, Rhys went back to his office for an important phone call. “See you on Saturday,” he reminded them before closing the door.

Azriel and Cassian worked in silence for the remainder of the day.

When Azriel came home that evening, he made a quick pasta carbonara to eat in front of the TV. He was re-watching New Girl. It was his comfort show and absolutely nobody knew that he watched it (and had watched it multiple times). He would take that information with him to the grave. But it was fun and cute and sometimes he liked to imagine his friends as characters in the show. Cassian was probably Schmidt, because Nesta was one hundred percent Cece. Feyre was Jess, which meant that Rhys was Nick. And then there was Azriel. He wanted to say that he was a very cool character, but most characters on this show weren’t cool, and also, he was definitely Winston. Alone with a cat - sounds about right , Azriel thought to himself as he finished his bowl of pasta.

When the episode ended he just waited for the next to start. He didn’t have any plans for the night and nowhere to be. His phone vibrated where he had left it on the kitchen counter. He ignored it, feeling too lazy to get up. But then it vibrated again. With a sigh, he got up. He expected to see a text from Mor telling him to bring wine tomorrow, or maybe a strange meme from Cassian. What he didn’t expect was to see Elain��s name on his screen.

He could feel his heart in his throat as he read her messages.

Elain Hey, Shadowsinger. I’m uploading a new video soon. You should watch it!

Elain I hope that message didn’t sound creepy? I just meant that I think you might like it.

Azriel’s hands were sweaty.

Azriel You didn’t sound creepy at all. Of course, I’ll watch your video. May I ask what I can expect from it?

Just seconds later, Elain answered.

Elain You can ask, but I might not tell ;)

Azriel Should I be worried?

Elain Haha, no! I think it turned out great. You were my inspiration :)

Azriel could feel himself blush. He had never been someone’s inspiration before.

Azriel So, I’m your muse? ;)

Oh god, was that too flirty? Was the winky-face too much? He wished that he could take back the message.

Elain For tonight, yes!

Azriel stared at his phone, unsure of what to answer. Luckily, Elain wrote to him again.

Elain What are you doing tonight?

Azriel Nothing. Just eating pasta and watching TV. How about you?

Elain That sounds amazing. I have been editing this video for hours so I’m just tired and cranky, haha. I have just ordered a pizza and I think I’ll just eat it in bed as soon as this video has finished uploading. What did you watch?

Azriel If I told you, I would have to kill you.

Elain Oh, intriguing! Is it trashy drama? I bet it’s Grey’s anatomy! Or maybe… Love Island?

Azriel stared at his phone. Did she really think that he would watch something like Love Island?

Azriel I watched New Girl, okay. Don’t tell anyone.

Elain Your secret is safe with me! Also, I love New Girl! Especially Winston!

It felt as if someone was squeezing Azriel’s heart.

Azriel Really? Which character would you be?

Elain My pizza is here so I am going to put all of my electronics in a different room and eat my pizza while reading a good book. It was great talking to you, Azriel! Please tell me what you thought of the video when you have watched it.

Elain Oh, and I would probably be Winston’s cat. lol

Azriel almost dropped his phone. If he had to be alone with a cat for the rest of his life, he would definitely want Elain to be his cat , he thought to himself. Which was a weird thing to think about someone you didn’t know. Azriel dropped his head to his kitchen counter and took a deep breath before replying.

Azriel It was great talking to you too, Elain. Enjoy your dinner and your book :)

She didn’t answer, but she didn’t have to. Azriel was going to be thinking about her for the rest of the night anyway.

30 minutes later, he got a notification telling him that Flower Girl ASMR had uploaded a new video. The video was called “ASMR for IT-guys”, which made him chuckle. He clicked the video and Elain’s beautiful face filled his screen again.

“Hello, my lovelies, lovelies, lovelies,” she whispered in her microphone. “This week’s video will be a bit different,” she continued, slowly moving her hands in front of the camera. “This video was inspired by my friend who recently helped me with some computer-related issues, issues, issues.”

Azriel loved it when she repeated words like that. And he liked that he somehow was a part of this video. It was something that connected them. Azriel paused the video and got into bed, knowing fully well that he would probably fall asleep soon if he kept watching this.

He pressed play again. “So, today, I thought that we would try a few computer-related triggers. I have a keyboard here,” she said and started typing on a keyboard that was out of view. “I thought that I would say a few trigger words while typing them.”

She smiled at the camera and pressed a few more keys. “I just wrote my friend’s name, but you won’t get to know who he is. But you know who you are. Thank you for your help!”

Azriel felt all warm inside.

She continued the video. “The first trigger word is IP address ”. Azriel laughed as she repeated the word multiple times while typing quickly.

“And then we have, laptop, laptop, laptop,” she continued, and Azriel felt shivers go down his spine when she popped the p’s.

Azriel had never thought that he would fall asleep to someone whispering “HTML coding” in his ears, but here he was. Relaxed and ready to sleep.

All thanks to Flower Girl ASMR.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

The next day, Azriel texted Elain that he had loved the video. He waited for hours, but no reply came. Maybe she just wanted to repay me for helping her? Azriel thought. Maybe she would stop talking to him now that he had seen the video.

The thought of never talking to Elain again made him feel a new kind of ache in his chest. An ache he didn’t want to feel. This stupid crush needs to end, he muttered to himself as he started to scrub his kitchen counter. He tried to ignore the feeling by keeping busy. He cleaned his apartment and did some laundry before heading over to his friends’ house.

Rhys greeted him by the door and ushered him inside.

“She started cooking like 15 minutes ago, please save whatever can be saved,” he whispered to Azriel. Azriel chuckled and made his way to the kitchen. On the way there, he passed the living room and stopped to greet his friends. He saw most of them on a daily basis because of work, but he was still happy to see them. Cassian and his fiancée Nesta sat close together on one of the green velvet couches. On the opposite couch sat Mor and Amren. Mor was one of the journalists at Velaris News, and Amren was an editor. They had known each other for years. Amren and Rhys had studied together at university, and Mor was Rhysand’s cousin. Once upon a time, Azriel had a crush on Mor. One night after one too many glasses at Rita’s he confessed his feelings to her and she had looked horrified. He had expected her to tell him that she didn’t fancy him and leave it at that, but instead, she had blurted “I like girls!”

Azriel was the first person she ever came out to, and he had felt honored. He also knew now that they wouldn’t have worked out together in the long run (even if Mor had been straight). They were just too different. She was energetic and outgoing and fun, he needed peace and quiet. But she was still one of his very best friends.

Amren on the other hand, he didn’t know as well. She had always been very private, but she was damn good at her job.

“Where’s Varian tonight?” Azriel asked Amren, trying to make small talk.

“How should I know?” she answered quickly. “I’m not his mother.”

Cassian stared at her. “But you are his girlfriend?”

She shrugged. “I don’t like to label things.”

Nesta rolled her eyes. Amren had lived with Varian for the past two years, but she was still reluctant to tell anyone about their relationship.

Azriel made his way into the kitchen, and from what he could tell, he made it just in time.

“What are you making, Feyre?” he asked, because truthfully, he couldn’t tell.

Feyre turned around quickly as if he had startled her. “Oh, hi Az,” she said and wiped her forehead with the back of her hand.

Something was burning.

“I was trying to make lamb chops with glazed carrots, roasted potatoes, and salsa verde, but…” she gestured to the stove, which looked like a disaster.

Azriel chuckled. “That’s ambitious.” He lifted the lid from one of the pots and could clearly see that she had overcooked the lamb 10 minutes ago. Also, why had she made them in a pot, and not a frying pan? It would be inedible.

The potatoes were still in the sink, unpeeled.

She gave him a strained smile. “Will you help me?”

“Of course.” Azriel put the grocery bag he had brought with him on the kitchen island. “On one condition.”

“Anything.” She sounded desperate.

“Please, for the love of god, let Rhys cook when we come over. You really don’t have to show off. You are good at many things, Feyre. But cooking is unfortunately not one of them.”

She nodded. “I know,” she sat down on one of the stools at the kitchen island and buried her face in her hand. “I just...I need to be able to cook when I become a mother.”

Azriel took her hand in his. “You really don’t. Nobody expect fathers to be good at cooking, so why should every mother be good at it? Honestly, just let Rhys cook while you play with the kids.”

She smiled at him. “That actually sounds amazing,” she sighed.

“Right?”

Azriel started to pull out some ingredients from the bag on the kitchen island. He held up the tomatoes and the spaghetti, “How about some pasta arrabbiata with burrata?”

“Sounds fancy.”

He shrugged. “Everything sounds fancier in a different language. It’s just pasta with a spicy tomato sauce, and burrata on top.”

“Whatever you make will probably be better than that mess,” she said and glanced towards the stove. Azriel couldn’t disagree.

“Probably,” he laughed and got to work. Azriel placed all the pots and pans in the sink and started chopping the vegetables for the sauce, and in just 30 minutes, dinner was served.

“You are my hero,” Feyre said and kissed his cheek as she carried the big bowl of pasta to the dining room.

Everyone had already gathered around the table, wine glasses in hand. As Azriel sat down, Mor poured him some wine.

“This looks amazing,” Nesta said and Cassian nodded in agreement.

“Thanks, Az helped a little,” Feyre said and winked at Azriel.

“Just a bit,” Azriel said and took a sip of wine.

The conversation (and wine) flowed freely, as it always did. Cassian and Nesta told them about their wedding plans, Mor gushed about Emerie, a girl she was dating, and Feyre told them about life as a high school art teacher. Azriel would never understand how anyone could choose to spend their days with teenagers, but Feyre loved it.

After two bottles of wine, Nesta and Mor were in an argument about which animal was the cutest.

“No, I am telling you, Sloths are cuter than any animal ever,” Mor exclaimed. “Have you seen their dopey little faces?”

“Sloths? Really?” Nesta looked at her as if she had suggested that the sky was green. “Red pandas are way cuter! They are cute and cuddly, Sloths just look like every single stoner I went to high school with.”

They had been at it for 10 minutes, which Azriel found to be quite impressive.

“Can you both just shut up?” Amren gritted out. “The cutest animals are koalas. They’re even cute when they fight. I am right, you are wrong. Please stop this meaningless discussion before I die from boredom.”

Nesta and Mor looked at Amren, and then at each other.

“We obviously have to see Koalas fight if you want us to end this conversation,” Mor said.

Nesta nodded. “Obviously. Give me your phone, Az,” she said and reached for his phone.

“Why do you need my phone?”

“Because mine is dead and yours is right there on the table. Also, your screen is big and we need to watch this in full HD, for obvious reasons.”

Azriel huffed a laugh, unlocked his phone, and handed it to Nesta.

She clicked the Youtube app, and then her face fell. She looked at Azriel as if he was an alien, and then she showed the phone to Cassian who looked at him with the same facial expression.

What the hell had they found?

He didn’t have anything weird on his phone. And he sure as hell didn’t watch porn on it.

“What?” Azriel asked, and Nesta turned the phone.

Fuck. The last video he had watched was still loaded on Youtube, and of course, it was Elain’s latest video.

“What the hell is this?” Nesta asked, almost looking angry.

Azriel didn’t understand why she found ASMR so wrong, but he desperately wanted to explain himself.

“Well, it’s ASMR. It’s kind of… well, it’s hard to explain, but it helps me sleep and– “

Nesta interrupted him before he could finish. “I know what ASMR is. I am wondering why you are watching Elain?”

Azriel stared at Nesta in shock. Did she also like Elain’s videos? But that wouldn’t explain the anger and confusion.

“Do you...know her?” Azriel asked.

“Yes, we went to university together. She’s our florist for the wedding. She was the florist at their wedding, too,” Nesta answered and gestured towards Rhys and Feyre. “Surely you have met her?”

Azriel could do nothing but shake his head in confusion. If he had ever met Elain, he would have known. You didn’t forget a face like hers.

“Please tell me you’re not stalking her like some creep, Az. Honestly, her last boyfriend was the world’s biggest asshat.”

“I’m not stalking her,” Azriel blurted out. “I’m just watching her videos to fall asleep, I promise. I– I didn’t know that you knew her.”

Nesta eyed him suspiciously. “So, is this just a coincidence?”

He nodded. “Weirder things have happened,” he said, trying to lighten the mood.

Nesta glanced at Cassian, and then back at Azriel. “Fine,” she said after a small eternity. “You would probably be cute together anyway. Sorry for insinuating that you would be a stalker.” She really did look remorseful. “That wasn’t fair. I’m just very protective of her. She’s the nicest girl, but she has horrendous taste in men.”

Azriel couldn’t answer, because his mind was still stuck on the fact that Nesta said that they would be cute together. He wanted to ask Nesta why she thought that. He kind of also wanted to ask her if Elain lived here in Velaris, and what her favorite movie was, and if she, by any chance, had a boyfriend. But he refrained, he didn’t want to sound like a stalker.

“So, what the fuck is ASMR?” Cassian asked. “Is it like porn?”

Before Azriel could answer, Rhys said “It’s like porn for your ears, I guess,” and then the entire table was laughing.

“Nesta,” Feyre said when the laughter had died down. “Does Elain still have that cute, little shop on River Street?”

“Mhm,” Nesta answered and took a sip of her wine.

Azriel could kiss Feyre for asking. And if he wasn’t mistaken, he could see her wink in his direction before raising her water glass to her lips.

Azriel walked home that evening with a million thoughts in his head.

He made a list in his head:

Elain lived in Velaris

River Street was literally a 10-minute walk from his home.

Nesta thought that they would be cute together

This meant nothing

She probably didn’t even like him back

Just because they were in the same city, it didn’t mean that they would ever meet.

This was still just a crush

And it was probably one-sided

She hadn’t even answered his latest text message.

And as if on cue, his phone vibrated in his pocket.

Elain I’m sorry that I didn’t answer you earlier. I’ve been at work all day. We had a leak in the basement and everything was just chaos. I haven’t even checked my phone until now.

He mentally scratched number 9 from his list.

Azriel No worries! Did you fix the leak?

Azriel checked the time on his phone: 23.30

Had she dealt with this leak until now?

Elain Yes! But so many flowers were ruined (I’m a florist) and I had to remake a few arrangements for a wedding that’s coming up.

Elain I’m sorry. You probably don’t care. I’m happy that you liked the video :)

Azriel wanted to tell her that he did care. That everything she said was interesting to him. He would probably even find her Starbucks order fascinating. But that bordered on stalker behavior.

Azriel Again, no worries! Sometimes when you’ve had a bad day, you just need someone to vent to.

Elain Exactly! Thank you for letting me vent :) This day is finally over!

There was a selfie attached to the last message.

Elain was standing in front of a big window surrounded by flowers. She was wearing a white, oversized shirt and her hair was in a messy bun. She looked tired but happy. She was giving him ‘thumbs up’ in the photo and through the window, he could see the Sidra. They were indeed in the same city. It made him both happy and nervous.

Elain Sweaty but happy to be heading home :)

Azriel received that last message when he walked through the door to his apartment. What the hell was he supposed to answer?

But then he thought back to Nesta’s words.

You would probably be cute together.

So he took a deep breath and gathered all his courage.

Azriel You still look beautiful though

He stared at his phone. Would she answer? Would she block him? Would she tell him to stop being a creep?

Elain Thank you :) What do you look like? I might have forgotten ;)

Okay. That was flirty. Even Azriel could tell that that was a flirty text message, and he was usually oblivious to such things. He quickly walked to his bathroom (it was the room with the best lighting). He checked his shirt (no stains) and mussed with his hair.

“Good enough,” he muttered, and snapped a selfie.

Before he could chicken out, he sent it to her.

Within seconds, he received a reply.

Elain Beautiful!

[yanderesimps]

Destined torture

Yandere Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

(Warnings: Unrequited love, forced relationships, forced intimacy, angst, obsession, soulmates AU)

❁-----------------------------------------------❁

It wasn't easy to avoid the blonde when you're the childhood friend of one of his main targets for bullying. Izuku Midoriya, the boy from across the street with a somewhat concerning all might addiction.

You two met in the park one day, stumbling over as you loomed over the greed haired boy as he played in the sandpit. The two of you had sat in awkward silence for a few minutes, always keeping about a meters distance between yourselves as you eyed each other quietly as shy children do.

Until you mumbled about how you liked his all might action figures and his eyes lit up like the night sky, filled with unimaginable excitement. It had all gone up from there of course but now instead you'd both graduated from harmless kiddies to slightly less harmless adolescents.

That of course meant that you had the pleasure to often have deal with the rampaging temper and relentless bullying of a certain Katsuki Bakugou. That wasn't to say that he'd always be such a brat, only ever giving you the brunt of his lashings when he would spy you with Izuku in the school halls.

For years he mercilessly hassled Izuku and it had only ever gotten worse when your classmates had begun to develop their quirks. Izuku, much to his dismay, had to face the bitter truth that he was indeed quickless.

You were almost afraid that your quick would've widened the divide between you two but it somehow in a weird way brought you two even closer if they was humanly possible. By all means, your quick wasn't flashy and explosive like Bakugou's but it had been noteworthy, nothing that get you into UA but respective nevertheless.

When Bakugou would begin his precise schedule of tormenting Izuku, you were steadfast in defending your best friend much to Bakugou's annoyance.

But when you spied Bakugou in the halls today, you'd expected the worst. Your lips twisted into a blatent frown which could make even Endeavour's fire run cold.

Bakugou approached, his hands shoved into his baggy trouser as he stood in front of you, his delinquent friend thankfully no where to be seen. You two stood in raging silence that seemed to ring louder in your ears that your thoughts of contempt for the boy in front of you.

Pulling a hand out of his trousers, you almost expected a bloody nose but soon found yourself staring at a crinkled envelope. You stared at the letter for a few moments before darting your unimpressed glare back to meet the red pupils that stated right back at you.

"Is this a new tecnique? Come to defeat me through the power of paper cuts?" You tittered, resisting the growing earge to swat the paper from his hand.

The blonde clicked his tongue at your sarcasm, thrusting the letter closer to you. "It's an invitation, dumbass, my birthday is next week and the hag made me give you this since she thinks we're friends or whatever"

"Oh my goodness! Why didn't you just say so? I'll make sure to put this in my files, right in the "remember to burn" section" You sang in fake glee, your mocking joyful expression soon falling back into its usual scowl when in the company of the blonde.

Bakugou's eye seemed to twitch slightly at your works and you could practically smell the caremel scent in the air heating up. Surprising, he didn't even say anything and simply turned on his heel to leave. "Well that was...boring" you said with almost a huff. In the past, making bakugou angry was something you actively avoided like the plague but now? It was nothing more than a fun family activity.

So when you didn't feel the flesh of your cheeks burning from 3rd degree burns it was nothing less than a shock. You could almost felt the bright heavens radiating down upon you. Had katsuki bakugou finally developed an actual personality that didn't involve being a dick?

Of course not.

But that still didn't explain why he was inviting you to a fucking birthday party.

It practically struck you like a brick when you realised what this meant.

Bakugou was now one year older

It was the day that everyone seemed to yern for. The day of the mark. A mark that would tell you the name of your soulmate. A mark that would appear on your 16th birthday.

It was bakugou's birthday.

He was turning 16 in one week.

And all that was just more gloating material.

There were quickless people which was bad enough. If you were quickless, you were seen as weaker, lesser and not normal but having no soul mark? It was practically a death sentence. You were seen as unlovable, unlikeable and unwanted. You were abnormal and disgusting. And ever since a certain blonde had developed a knat for explosions and Izuku hadn't, never having a soulmark was the first bullet in Katsuki's rifle when it came to his conquest of making Izuku's life a living nightmare.

And now for the next few months until your birthday it was all you two were going to hear about.

Heaven's gates swung closed right then and there and the pits of hell threatened to swallow you right there.

"Y/n"

You suddenly snapped out of your inner dialogue to see Deku approaching you with a slightly worried expression. Perhaps you'd been spending too much time standing silently while imagine your future months of torment from bakugou.

You pulled an eneasy grin and rubbed the back of your neck nervously. "No it's fine! Just fine!"

The boys face lit up with his classic smile that made your own heart warm. "great! Wanna get lunch then?" Clasping his arm you nodded with a stark grin. "Let go. I'm starving"

....

...

..

"What's you favorite type of coffin, Izuku?"

_______

There was no amount of pleading that would have gotten you out of this situation, no matter how hard you pleaded to your mother. She didn't even care that your funeral would be expensive.

So now here you were.

In a dress.

Your hair dolled up.

Make-up.

Planning out your 13th reason why.

Standing outside bakugou's home with a present clasped in your hands, the decently loud chatter within taughting you like the drums of War but then again you were practically about to dive into the trenches.

Your numb finger pressed the doorbell, your heart seemed to stutter at the sound of a nearing voice.

"Katsuki! Open your presents later!!" screeched a voice of whom you could only assume was miss Bakugou. The door opened the woman in front of you visable brightened as she glowed down upon you.

"Y/n, what a pleasant surprise, get in here! Katsuki's in the back garden" The woman's mood had practically done a full 180° at a mere glance of your slightly shaky form. "I'll take that, now go in and have fun with the others" She hummed with a wild smile as she took the neatly wrapped present from your sweaty palms. You merely nodded in response, finding that your throat had closed in on itself making it impossible to even swallow down your initial fear.

You could hear the distant cheering, chatting and occasional parent's voice as you walked further into the house, closer to the clear glass slide door that revealed the decoration littered back garden.

There only kids you could see were the possy that would always surround the blonde haired boy, the occasional guy you'd know from class and almost ever girl that would drop to their knees in the hope of katsuki bakugou noticing them.

Most never glanced at you, some glared at you in disgust but one particular pair of red eyes were fixated on you the moment you stepped in the garden.

You nearly cried tears of joy that the make up had taken so long since it seemed you'd actually missed the majority of the festivities. "In and out. This'll all be over soon" You hummed, trying to pathetically console yourself.

You'd made a beeline for the corner with the least amount of people, seating yourself on a lawn chair before quickly pulling out your phone, ideally hoping that you'd allowed to spend the next hour just lazily scrolling through your phone before grabbing a slice of cake and leaving.

Sadly, that wasn't what fate had instore. You looked up from your phone screen as a shadow suddenly loomed over you. "What? Not even gonna give me a happy birthday" Bakugou sneered, glaring down at you. Your own expression twisted into the perfect rendition of what the word "hatred" meant. Your eyes narrowed, your nose crumpled and lips fell into a neat frown. "I'm sure you'll find a way to survive without my half heart congratulations"

The boy above you nearly smiled at your words as he clicked his tounge and sat on the chair next to you. "Not even curious to find out who my soulmate is?" You raised and eyebrow but your expression remained the same. You took a mere glance at his wrist, only to see it covered before returning your gaze. That seemed to satisfy the boy in front of you as his grin widened visably.

"Don't flatter yourself, I'm just praying for the poor soul that is destined to be with you for the rest of their days"

Bakugou just laughed and then left, leaving you in a puddle of confusion. He should've already gotten his soul mark, so why wasn't he parading it around like he did with everything?

You didn't give it another though, returning to your phone for the next while and brushing off the unsettling feeling the crawled up your spine.

__________

It wasn't surprising that they waited for the big reveal after bakugou had blown out his candles. You were just mildly aggrivated that such torture was continously being forced upon you rather than just letting you go home.

Everyone had crowded around the table where the cake sat. You, for some reason, found yourself stood at the corner of the table nearest to bakugou who stood in the center alone as the other surrounded the other sides.

Ms Bakugou had placed a hand on your shoulder and who you looked up to ask her why she was so clingy, she merely silenced you with a toothy smile.

She seemed to be excited about something.

Everyone had begun a countdown as katsuki raised his hand to everyone, lightly gripping his sleeve that hid the name of his future beloved.

You simply joined in hopes that the scene would go by faster, you didn't even look when he pulled down the arm of his jacket. You only notice the silence that followed after.

Then you noticed the eyes burrowed upon you.

The tightening grip on your shoulder.

Bakugou's glare.

How he was lightly smiling.

Then you noticed your first name neatly written into the flesh of his wrist.

The world seemed to slow then it had all soon went by like a blur just like you. Reality seemed to slip away at the seems and all you could do was slightly nod at the voices of congratulations and bright smiles of bakugou's parents. Disoriented, eyes pickled with tears as your dry throat struggled to find words.

Why was Katsuki still smiling?

__________

You'd been branded that day.

"Katsuki's girl"

Always finding a firery arm latched around your waist or shoulders as you were paraded down that halls like a spectacle for the ages.

You weren't allowed to speak to Izuku anymore or any guy for that matter. It wasn't like any of them risked their necks to talk to you anyway ever since Katsuki claimed you, broadcasting his mark like a trophy, a fitting collar that was locked around your neck.

You found yourself seated with the popular girl at every lunch when Katsuki didn't cling to you, people who you once years to be next to and chat with. Now it just felt empty. Empty conversation. Empty smiles. Empty happiness.

You would sometimes catch Izuku's eye in the hallways as a river of words went unsaid between you two. Then katsuki would tell him to "fuck off" before dragging you to class.

Life wasn't fun anymore. It wasn't even livable.

You barely realised how the month passed and your birthday was right around the corner. In fact, it was tomorrow.

"We'll have matching pairs then-? Hey, idiot, you listening to me?"

"Yes, Katsuki"

"good. I would hate to think you were ignoring me again" His palm gripped your chin like a face, tilting your head before he smashed his wet lips to yours. It was clumsy. It made you feel disgusting.

A hand sorely gripped your thigh, snaking up the helm of your school skirt. You didn't even bother to swat him away there days when he got handsy. It just encouraged him more to discipline you.

"I'll make sure to get you a great present, you'll love it" You knew what he meant by that, it made your heart drop and stomach threaten to heave.

Bakugou soon got up to leave with a group of his friends, leaving you to wallow in you own desperation. You glanced at your wrist. Katsuki had been baring down upon it every day to see if there was even an inclination that his name was appearing.

In reality it didn't really matter, it was just gloating privileges for him now, a way of bragging that you two were destined and you would be hs fine piece of ass for life.

You stroked the reddened skin, it had been sore lately.

"please..."

"Please...anyones name...just as long as its not his"

__________

"Come on, Y/n!"

"Show us!"

"Its obvious what it is gonna say"

You didn't even bother to check what your wrist said when you woke up this morning. Katsuki made you promise that you wouldn't and that you would wait for school.

So here you were, seated in the cafeteria with the majority of the class surrounding you a Katsuki. You could practically feel the pride radiating from him right now.

"go ahead, babe, show em"

And so you did, jutting out your arm and revealing the name to all around.

It was silent again. You expected squeals of jealously, congrats and awe.

Silence. It was louder than any sound imaginable at that moment .

You looked up from where your listless glare had fallen onto your lap to the wide eyes all baring down upon you.

"Oh...hard...luck, Bakugou"

Your eyes fell to your wrist.

"Izuku"

Perhaps fate wasn't so cruel after all.

[bakugou-tm]

Master Knows Best (18+)

Bakugou x Maid Cafe Reader

plot: You’ve gone almost a full year working at a maid cafe with none of your friends finding out, which is exactly how you liked it; but thanks to a certain friend your beloved hot headed boyfriend found out your secret and planned on teasing you the whole time. In a stubborn attempt to get back at him, you realized exactly what would happen if you disobeyed your master

warnings: suggestive NSFW, swearing, a shit ton of teasing

wc: 5200+

mood song: worst behavior

a/n: I was supposed to post this on valentine’s day but it’s better late than never right? I perhaps may make a part two depending on how this does but I’m also a s s at NSFW so we’ll see. For now just enjoy (especially my fellow brats out there)

You liked things to be simple. You were a simple girl, with a simple life.

Sure you had your secrets, but thanks to your overall simplicity, nobody even bothered to uncover them.

That’s just the way you liked it too. Each different part of your life was separated as they should, for if they intertwined your life would becoming a living nightmare.

You never dreamed that living nightmare would become a reality. Who knew all it would take to crumble the reputation you built up for so long...

was a simple text.

Sweat trickled down the ash blond’s toned arms, his ragged breath becoming more steady as he slumped down against the wall while his friend took a few rounds at the punching bag.

The sound of his phone buzzing beside him didn’t drag him out of his exhausted mindset quite yet, but when his crimson eyes glanced across the words on the screen he felt everything come to a halt.

electric dunce: remember that day time job (l/n) said she had during the weekends? i think i found it bro..

electric dunce: 1 attachment

Bakugou’s red haired training buddy noticed the change in spirit with his blond friend, noticing how his heavy breathing suddenly stopped.

Wiping his gloved hand across his forehead, Kirishima glanced down to his friend only to see Bakugou’s eyebrows knit in a deep focus.

“You uh... You okay bro?” Kirishima questioned with a raised brow, trying to control his own ragged breaths after he attacked the swaying back before him.

Before he could question his friend once more, Bakugou let out a breathy chuckle, one filled with mischief and even excitement if Kirishima listened well enough.

“Training is cut short today shitty hair.”

-

“Come onnnn (L/n), how could you tell us you have a job then not tell us what it is?” The pink haired girl whined as she slid her upper half onto your lap and sighed dramatically.

Giggling slightly your eyes flicked to Kaminari across from you as his lips doubled over into a pout, “The whole point of having a job is so your friends can come crash it!”

“And to make some money dumbo.” You sneered, flicking his forehead gently while glancing down to Mina’s attempt at puppy dog eyes, “Besides, I didn’t want to tell you guys. You forced me to tell you where I went after school or you said you would doxx me.”

Your friends let out a sigh of defeat as Kirishima glanced to your boyfriend beside you, “C’mon Baku-bro not even you know where she works?”

Smirking slightly you placed a gentle palm on your boyfriends cheek and winked to him tauntingly,

“Not even Katsuki~”

Bakugou simply clicked his tongue and smacked your hand away, “I don’t know because I don’t fucking care.”

Oh but he did care. It ate away at him everyday that you refused to reveal where you worked. You claimed it would be “embarrassing” for him to see you working and wearing a uniform but he failed to understand why it would be. He brutally antagonized you all the time and you never bat an eye, why would he care if he saw you wearing a ‘Mini-Mart’ uniform?

You simply hummed at your boyfriend’s denial and leaned against his side.

“Say whatever you need to make you feel better love,” You purred, grinning at his scowl before you looked to your group of friends,

“Because you will never find out where I work, ever.”

-

Bakugou felt like he was in a state of euphoria as he stood before the quaint wooden doors, decorated with all sorts of pastel ribbons and paint.

It was almost as if he was entering the doors of heaven, the ultimate satisfaction of knowing he was about to beat you and your stupid threat.

And better yet, of all the places to find out you worked, it was here?

Oh he was going to enjoy this, even beyond getting revenge.

“Never find out my ass.” Bakugou sneered with a smirk, letting the soft breeze flow through his spiky locks as he tugged open the door into the unknown.

Meanwhile you were attempting to gracefully, yet quickly, get your uniform back on since your break ended in about thirty seconds. You hated how good you had gotten at putting on this stupid uniform, soon enough it would be second nature to you.

Working at a Maid Cafe wasn’t exactly where you planned to end up. When you stumbled onto the small podium in kindergarten to announce your future career, you surely didn’t say “I want to be a server at a Maid Cafe!”

And yet here you were pulling up the thigh high socks to your frilly, bow covered maid dress.

Admittedly when you were searching for jobs, you were surprised to find no luck. Any job that paid well required university years, and any left over job wouldn’t pay enough for your time to walk there.

It wasn’t until your aunt came to you in your troubles and recommended the job of your nightmares.

“My sweetheart why don’t you just work at my niece’s Maid Cafe? You’ll get to work with very sweet young girls about your age, and they pay very well since they have a very diverse clientele!”

Immediately you threw away the idea before you could even process it, the thought of having to serve gross old men and pretend to be excited while doing it didn’t sound appealing, let alone possible.

With that said, that didn’t mean your aunt was going to give up just yet. Without telling you she scheduled an interview for you, telling you if you didn’t show up it would make your family look bad.

Feeling the inevitable guilt throughout the day, you submitted into your aunt’s wishes and at least showed up to the interview.

Who knew? Maybe they would just let you be a janitor or something.

Sure enough they wanted you as a maid, but before you could even deny they offered double what any job had offered you, even the high paying ones.

“We know the job isn’t ideal, which is why we pay so much. A young girl like you would be just perfect here!”

Push came to shove, and somehow you ended up working at the cafe for a year and a half now.

You couldn’t lie, dressing up all cute and getting to hang out with a bunch of sweet girls was pretty fun. It beats mopping an empty grocery store with creepy co-workers.

With that said, the dread of having to deal with pervy customers and the existential fear of one of your friends walking through the door almost outweighed the pros of the job.

Luckily you had been able to escape doom for this long, so what are the odds that would change anytime soon?

-

The sound of the bell charming brought you back to your senses, quickly tying the silk bow behind your back you stumbled out into the break room to see your boss awaiting.

“Phew I thought you almost ditched us (L/n).” Your boss said with a wink.

Rolling your eyes you began walking backwards towards the swinging doors that led to the dining room.

“Have I ever failed you Miss Manager?” You purred with a grin.

Satisfied with her laugh you danced through the double doors, putting on your cute act once again. Only two hours left and you could go home and pig out on what was left in your pantry.

If that’s truly all it took, you didn’t mind turning on your “anime girl” side for a few hours.

Smiling at all the guests you made sure to check on everyone’s table before making your way towards the greeting podium. The doorbell went off so that meant some sort of customer was waiting to be sat.

Giving one last wink to a customer you whipped your head towards the front doors and gave a small bow before looking up.

“Welcome back to Maid Cafe master, would you like me to show you to your se..AHHHH!”

The moment your eyes met the sturdy figure before you, all senses jumped out the window as you screeched and jumped backwards defensively.

How.. How could this happen? This couldn’t be happening. All your intricate planning and anxious working to make sure no one you knew would ever catch you on the job.

And out of all the people in the world... it had to be Katsuki Bakugou.

Your ever so taunting boyfriend.

Sure enough Bakugou had a shit eating grin on his face, his eyes glowing with excitement for probably more reasons than you could count.

“Well well well, don’t you look familiar.”

At this point words weren’t even an option in your mind, you couldn’t tell if the cold spike of fear shooting up your spine was worse or the overwhelming heat that flared along your face.

Your little outburst didn’t go unnoticed by the guests and maids, all eyes moved to the two of you as you stumbled over your own words.

“Y..You- I.. but I.. and you! I can’t...”

“(L/n) is something the matter?”

The sound of your boss’ sweet voice from behind you caused you to shriek again as you now jumped to face her.

Feeling your face grow even warmer you avoided eye-contact with her, trying to use what was left of your slowly deflating brain to come up with an excuse to fix this entire mess.

“Yeah princess, is something the matter?”

Between the chilling tone and the pet name you physically shuddered, your head slowly peaking back to the problem at hand.

Bakugou couldn’t help but notice your reaction, sneering cockily as he looked down on you with pride.

“Zip it Bakugou-” 

“Ah ah..” Bakugou started before you could even finish your threat, “I believe you are supposed to refer to me as master.”

If your brain wasn’t broken before, it sure was now. Your internal mix of equally enjoying this and hating this had officially clashed and broken any sense at this point. All you could feel beyond anger at this point was complete and utter embarrassment.

“(L/n) you’re not having any trouble greeting our guest, are you?” Your boss questioned sternly.

You’ve honestly never heard her get so serious with you, given this was far from her angry side, but you hated disappointing your superiors.

Glancing around you still noticed some eyes on you along with your suspicious boss’. At this point there was no escaping the situation, and like hell were you going to give this bastard the satisfaction of your embarrassment.

“N..No ma’am, no trouble at all!” You said back in your sweet work voice, offering the best smile you could muster before twitching back to your smug boyfriend.

“Let me uh... let me show you to your table...” You stuttered out, grabbing a single menu before looking up at your expectant boyfriend’s expression. You knew exactly what the little shit was waiting for, and if you didn’t say it your boss would surely drag you to the back.

“Master.”

Bakugou sighed in dramatic satisfaction, clasping his hands together sarcastically and bending down to your level, “Fucking splendid.”

Gritting your teeth you glared into his crimson orbs before spinning on your heel, plastering the cute smile on your face so your boss could get off your back.

Once she seemed to notice you returned to your old state, she let out a gentle sigh and walked away to serve her tables.

At the very least you felt a bit less tense knowing she wasn’t following you like a hawk, but she was far from the problem at hand.

Quickly b-lining towards a table in the corner, you slammed the menu down and pulled out the chair, offering the most sarcastically pleasant smile you could.

Bakugou gladly took his seat, making sure to drag his hand along the small of your back on the way down. He throughly enjoyed each time you shivered from his touch, or even words.

First you decided to take his order, making sure all eyes were officially off the two of you. Once you decided the coast was clear, you quickly grabbed the collar of his tank top, as you bent down to be eye level with him.

“How did you find out about my job Katsuki.”

Bakugou grunted in surprise, catching himself quickly before he smirked back to your fuming expression. Oh how adorable you were when you were mad.

Your thick eyebrows would knit together in a deep focus and your plush lips would pinch into a perfect pout that drove him crazy.

As the blond smugly glanced over your features, his eyes flicked up only to notice other eyes were facing the two of you once again, only this time they only seemed to be on you. On your backside.

The way you were bending down seemed to perfectly expose your backside to the world, and your dumbass was too oblivious with him to even realize it.

Clicking his tongue, Bakugou placed a firm palm on the edge of your spine before shoving you down to your knees so the back of your dress would cover your backside once again.

The action caused a small yelp to escape your lips, you assumed he had done it to embarrass you which made you that much more mad.

“Answer. My. Question.”

Once the ash blond was satisfied with your state and he glared at any that dared to still look at you, he glanced back down to your fiery orbs with an unimpressed look.

Rolling his eyes he slapped your hand away causing you to huff before he shoved the photo Kaminari sent to him.

Glancing over the photo you eyes widened to see a photo of you through the window of the Maid Cafe assisting a customer.

Your cheeks began to glow red again as you worriedly looked up to Bakugou, “You guys actually doxxed me?!”

Bakugou raised a brow and snatched his phone back with a sigh.

“I didn’t, I can’t speak for that stupid dunce but I’ll deal with his reasoning later,” He explained before his dreadful smirk returned as he cupped the edge of your chin, “Back to the elephant in the room, how come you hid such a delicious fucking secret from your master.” 

As much as you would’ve loved this behind closed doors, to be openly embarrassed in public made your head feel like it was going to explode.

“S..Stop acting all smug you idiot!” You snapped, smacking his hand from your chin and standing up straight, “I hid this from you so you wouldn’t act like an egotistical dick.”

At this Bakugou barked out a laugh, the booming sound causing you to jump a bit as he slouched back in his chair, folding his arms with that smug grin.

“I think we’ve already come to the conclusion that my fucking ego is backed up, or have you forgotten doll?”

His piercing red eyes narrowed to your own, the sight making you blush as you jerked your head to the side and huffed.

“Can you order already idiot? I’ve got plenty of other orders to take.”

Bakugou simply smirked and picked up the menu, glancing down the options before shoving it in your arms.

“I’ll get two of the shitty rice bears,” He explained, grinning when he saw you look up with a raised brow, “I’ve got a hungry maid coming home soon waiting to please her master.”

Your confused expression turned into a flushed angry one as you snatched the menu from him and turned on your heel. You didn’t even remember what he asked for but at this point you didn’t care. You just wanted to hide from the customers so you could collect what dignity you had left.

The moment you brushed by the double doors you let out a sigh of relief as you rested your head against the back wall. Maybe if you closed your eyes and pinched yourself hard enough you would wake up from this horrible nightmare?

You could only imagine the things Bakugou was thinking. Does he think you’re some ditzy pushover maid girl now? Is he texting your friends telling them that you work here? Honestly Kaminari has probably already done that.

It was so nice having the upper hand on him for once, but now that he took every last bit of dignity and laughed in your face, you were doomed.

“Rough shift huh?”

Raising your brows you peaked an eye open to see one of your coworkers with a concerned expression. Standing up straight you fixed a piece of your hair and nodded.

“Yeah I guess you could say that..”

“How come you were acting so weird with that customer (L/n)-chan?” Your manager called from behind, carrying a bunch of plates as she walked beside your coworker, “Is it because he’s crazy hot?”

Folding your arms you let out a huff as you pouted your lips out,

“Try boyfriend.”

Both girls gasped in shock, your boss nearly dropping the plates in her hand as they looked two you in disbelief.

“Wow sorry for calling him hot, I never knew you had a boyfriend (L/n)! And a hunk at that~”

Letting out a slight chuckle, both your eyes fell on your coworker when she spoke up.

“You know this same thing happened to me with my boyfriend,” She spoke while tapping her finger against her cheek in thought, “I didn’t want him finding out about my job because I knew he would make fun of me, then one day he showed up and sure enough started making fun of me.”

Frowning you let out a sigh as you rubbed the side of your face exasperatedly, “My dumb boyfriend is doing that too! What did you end up doing with yours?”

Your coworker grinned as she shrugged.

“I simply fought fire with fire. Since he was making fun of me, I made him eat his words and watch me serve the other customers. He ended up getting so jealous he left!”

The advice she had given you finally brought warmth back to your numb body, you felt a grin rise to your face as you quickly wrapped your arms around your coworker.

“You are a lifesaver woman! I owe you so much for that advice.”

Your coworker simply laughed and hugged you back, happy to see you back in your normal cheerful state.

“Yeah have some fun but don’t ruin the experience for our other guests!” Your boss called out before walking out the door with the plates.

“I should probably get out there too, let me know if you need any help (L/n)-chan.” Your coworker said with a mischievous grin before dancing out the double doors.

Your mind was rushing with ideas, how could you of not thought of this before? Your explosive boyfriend could get jealous from a rock on the street, this would be the perfect pay back for you!

If he was going to come into your workplace and wreak havoc, you would do the same for his inflated ego.

Fixing up your dress you grabbed the two plates and narrowed your eyes towards the dining room.

“Bring it on Bakugou Katsuki.”

-

Oh did Bakugou feel pleased with himself.

Normally he hated skipping out on a workout, but this was worth it.

He couldn’t let the image of your adorable flushed expression and tense body escape his mind. Let alone that maid costume on you was divine on your plush skin.

The fact that you refused to wear a maid costume in the bedroom made it that much better, no wonder you were trying to hide this job from him.

The way the black silk hugged every curve, just tight enough to where your skin was overflowing from the material. And those thighs squeezing out of those adorable thigh highs drove him wild.

If he hadn’t made the best discovery of his life today, he would almost be mad you were strutting around in such a costume for anyone other than himself.

Deciding to wait another day to deal with that, Bakugou simply enjoyed the scenery and awaited for his girlfriend.

Just like clockwork he saw your form dance out of the backroom a bit too peppy. The thought of you “collecting” yourself in the back only made him sneer with a sadistic grin, he would simply break you all over again when you served him the food.

Just as you sauntered over to his table, the ash blond looked you up and down with a smirk, opening his mouth to say something truly condescending until your body turn away from him and towards another table.

“Here’s your panda shaped muffin and honeydew boba masters!” You spoke to the two customers at the table in front of him, “Is there anything else I can get for you my handsome masters?”

Bakugou felt his heart drop at the sound of you calling another living organism your master. Were you doing this on purpose? Is this usually how you talked to the shitty customers here?

His answer was confirmed when a small squeak escaped your lips and you bent down towards the table, your chest surely giving the two guests a show given their cherry lit cheeks as your thumb grazed across one of the customer’s cheeks.

“Silly master, you have some icing on your cheek.” You said with the most divine giggle he had ever heard. Gritting his teeth his entire world froze when you stuck the finger in your mouth and licked the white cream off clean, “No worries, I got it for you~”

The man before you looked like he was going to bust on the spot, his friend watching with his jaw dropped and eyes filled with jealousy.

Smiling sweetly you gave them one last bow, “Let me know if you need anything else masters!”

Just before you danced away from their table you glanced to Bakugou, giving him a small smirk as you looked him up and down with unimpressed eyes before sauntering away, leaving your explosive boyfriend on the verge of a breakdown.

You truly had a death wish. It was the only explanation for your actions. For almost a full hour you kept that act up, leaving the many guests within the cafe speechless and ogling over you. You knew exactly how jealous Bakugou could get, and you knew he hated admitting it.

Of course Bakugou also knew what a little tease you were. He didn’t miss the delight in your glistening eyes each time you taunted him, waiting for the repercussions of his wrath. But this...

This crossed the line of his sanity.

The ash blond tried to wait til your shift was over, he really did. As furious as he was with you, he wasn’t irresponsible enough to make you lose your job. But the moment your finger tips danced along the shoulder of a guest, any bit of restraint the male had left in his body had snapped like a twig.

The sound of him storming up from his table caused the immediate guests around him to look up, his silverware clanking against the pink trimmed plate as he made a direct line towards you.

Unfortunately for you, the scene your boyfriend caused went over your head as you continued to jot down the order from the customers before you. Focusing on your blossom shaped ordering pad you didn’t notice the horrified expressions on the customers before you as the saw an angry Bakugou storming up behind you.

“I’ll get those orders right up for you masters~” You exclaimed with a cute wink as you began to walk off until a firm hand wrapped around your wrist in a vice grip.

Bakugou could have loosened his bit a grip he realized when you let out a small yelp but he had already committed and like hell was he going to let you flirt with another damn customer right before his very eyes.

Your sweet words, gentle touches, suggestive actions... they weren’t meant for him and him only.

Immiedetly you recognized your boyfriend’s sharp hold and tried to tug your hand away so not to make a scene, but the ash blond simple spun your wrist around and pinned it to your back, giving him full control of wherever you walk.

With a squeak he shoved you forward, causing you to stumble over your own feet as he quickly pushed you towards the backroom.

You briefly met gaze with your boss as he shoved you by, your eyes pleading for help as they were filled with regret. Your boss opened her mouth, not sure what to even do.

“E..Excuse me sir? You can’t touch the-”

Before she could even finish her sentence Bakugou flashed a sharp glare to the woman, his crimson orbs thin from lack of patience and absolute fury.

Your boss was smart enough to know your boyfriend was truly about to go feral, for her life and your own she decided it was best to turn away and pretend she saw nothing.

You let out a small pout when you saw her attempt to serve the shocked guests, leaving you to be shoved into the backroom by a surely pent up Bakugou.

Once you reached the back you saw your coworker, the one that had given you such brilliant advice before, shoving a pastry in her mouth as she was on her break. Her eyes first fell on the dark lidded ones of your boyfriend before falling on your pleading fearful eyes.

Her mouth opened, unsure of what to say before closing.

“I’m uh.. gonna take my break outside.” She muttered softly, politely pushing the chair in and offering the best smile she could before she quickly shuffled out the back doors.

Once the room was clear Bakugou let go of your wrist, giving you a chance to stretch your arm back in it’s proper position before the sound of the back door slamming to a close caused you to shriek in surprise.

Bakugou couldn’t help but smirk as you jumped, as angry as he was he loved seeing you so on edge thanks to him. Returning to a serious expression he watched as you turned around, attempting to put on a serious face of your own.

“Bakugou you know I still have thirty minutes left of my shift-”

Trying to speak was hard enough as is with the thick tension in the room, but when the ash blond slammed his hands on either side of you against the wooden break table you let out a shriek and quickly sat back against the ledge attempting to gain some more space between you two.

The action made him chuckle dryly as he looked you up and down.

“You’re still going to act like a fucking brat huh? After the show you just put on?” Bakugou spoke lowly, his eyes drinking in the sight of your costume only swirling more pent up feelings within him, “Someone’s feeling spunky today?”

You bit at the corner of your lip, swallowing what left of saliva was in your dry mouth as you tried terribly to avoid eye contact.

“Hiding such a naughty job from me, and then when I catch you red handed this is the treatment I get?” Bakugou hisses with clenched fists, “You should’ve been at my fucking heel all day for keeping such a delicious lie from me and yet you taunt me like you’re the one in charge?”

His harsh words made heat rise to your cheeks as you looked down at your frilly dress, trying to find anything to look at besides his face. Surely you knew that wasn’t going to pass with him.

“Look at me when I fucking speak to you brat.” Bakugou growled, his eyes narrowing when he saw your lips pinch together stubbornly.

Letting out an annoyed sigh he grabbed your wrist roughly before shoving you back against the thin wall and grabbing your jaw harshly shoving it against the wall with a hard knock, forcing your eyes to meet.

The sight of your cheeks being squished together by his large palms and your wide glassy eyes forced to look into his own, he couldn’t hide his smug smirk as he felt you lightly tremor beneath him.

“Much better doll.” Bakugou cooed, voice laced with sarcasm as you both knew the next chain of events were about to get quite violent.

“Now, I was planning on patiently waiting for you to get off so we could take this conversation in private...” Bakugou spoke, eyes narrowing down to yours as he let out a sinister laugh, “Hell I even bought you a treat, I’m such a generous fucking boyfriend aren’t I?”

Your breathing was ragged as you stared up into his crimson eyes, your brain was so fogged by the situation that you hadn’t even realized what he asked until his grip on your jaw tightened.

“I asked you a fucking question.”

Blinking back to reality you nodded deserpatly, not daring to look away from his gaze as you let out a slight whimper that shot directly to his pants.

“Good.” Bakugou said with a dark smile before continuing on, “But now I cannot go along with that generous plan because you can’t go two seconds without acting like a fucking slut.”

The filthy words spewing from his lips caused your face to grow warm, the entire situation already had your silk underwear drenched, but his words alone caused you to brush your plump thighs together desperately.

Your actions didn’t go unnoticed by the ash blond as he roughly shoved a knee between your legs causing a whine to escape your lips when he refused to put any friction on your aching core.

“Even now you can’t help but act like a brainless bitch in heat.” Bakugou sneered with a grin, his hand on your jaw lowering to now grip on your neck gently so not to cut off any air.

“Because you’ve disobeyed me multiple times today, I’m going to have to set you straight right here in public so you know who truly has the power here.”

Your mouth opened to rebuttal as your eyes widened at his idea, but his hand only gripped tighter around your throat causing the words shove back down your throat.

“And then,” Bakugou hissed, “If you perform like a good little maid, I may give you what you want when we get home. Maybe.”

You let out a shaky breath as he narrowed his eyes down to you, trying to read what you were feeling right now.

“Now you’re going to be my good little slutty maid and serve me until I’m satisfied, you fucking got that?”

As Bakugou’s grip on your neck loosened, your posture relaxed a bit as you nodded to his question, only for the grip to return as he growled down to you.

“Try again.”

Biting your lip your thighs attempted to squeeze against his knee for any sort of friction at all as any conscious thought was clouded with ashamed lust for the man before you.

“Y..Yes master.”

[barbenheimer-core]

AUDERE EST FACERE !

하나. chanel : part four — 3k words

Wangja crossed the street with a bag of two steaming bowls of ramyeon and red ginseng, speeding up his pace to prevent the noodles from getting too soggy while he walked the path over to his shop where he had left Ahyeong at, sighing as he thought about the new addition to the cast.

When he had walked into his store last night, he was not expecting a stage to commence immediately upon entering the lounge.

Thank the writer (this was the first and last time he was going to say that) that their conversation and actions had already been written out, or else the shop owner would've been gawking at the new girl for the entirety of the stage.

He had been immensely startled back then; it was unusual for him to not know the timing and plot of every stage because he always made sure to check the comic that permanently resided in a small, hidden corner of his shop every single day.

But when he had browsed the comic as soon as Ahyeong had left, he had been bewildered at the sudden shift in the book's contents.

The cast page had been altered to feature four main characters instead of the original trio, and as he had turned the pages, he had noticed the new stages being inked with interactions that had never been present as of before.

To think that an already complicated web of troubling relationships had not been enough for the writer, they had proceeded to add a love square to the mix.

Wangja grimaced at his creator's choices in life. They had definitely been influenced by someone to do so if it had been so last minute.

But one thing was for sure; out of all the stories that the writer had put him in, this was by far the most interesting.

"Ahyeong-ah! I'm back!" he yelled into the air as he stepped in, his voice echoing in the shop.

The silence was his only response.

Confused, he stepped through the streamers that decorated the lounge's archway, eyes searching for the girl while he set the food down on the coffee table next to the abandoned copy of Shiver.

"Ahyeong, are you here-"

He stopped abruptly, gaze finding the peach cover of True Beauty toppled upside down on the floor in front of a shelf he swore no one would notice.

With dread in his mind, he picked it up, turning it around, only to be faced by the drawn version of the person he was looking for.

Oh no. She'd seen it.

If Gilyeong had to describe his sister at that moment, he would've said she looked like she'd risen from a grave in a zombie apocalypse movie.

She looked dead. Alive, yes, but dead.

Like someone had told her whole life was a lie.

When Ahyeong had arrived back home from wherever she had dashed off to during the morning, she had looked like she'd gone through the five stages of grief, questioned the meaning of life, and ran a marathon through the streets of Seoul by how hard she was breathing.

He had almost asked her if she was okay, but that would've come off as him being "concerned for his dear sister," as Eunjung had so uselessly put it, and he hated proving people right. And besides, Ahyeong was clearly not okay.

"Oye, grinch," he called out across the table after seeing her actions.

She looked as if she hadn't even heard him. No annoyed flinch, no irritated twitching of her eyebrow; no reaction at all. Just her mindlessly trying to eat soup with chopsticks.

Eunjung looked at her with an extreme amount of concern.

Gilyeong almost puked at the feeling of worry in his gut.

Ahyeong was functioning on auto-pilot, her consciousness having taken a backseat as the only thing that moved her was sheer muscle memory.

She couldn't even remember how she had come back to her house, however, the stinging in her legs informed her of how she had deserted the shop and ran all the way back home, much to Driver Kwon's horror.

Her head felt empty.

Being in a comic? As a bully? That had to be the most ridiculous thing she had ever heard, or read, about herself.

It did not make sense. She was quite literally a model student, with a record as clean as glass. Being reduced to the likes of a bully? Impossible.

And then the derealisation came in.

This probably wasn't real after all. Maybe it was just one big practical joke blown out of proportion.

Yeah, that was it, she concluded as she finally became aware of her surroundings, dropping the chopsticks in her hands with a confused look and picking up a spoon to continue eating her soup, unaware of the small breath of relief from across the table.

That weird paralysis thing hadn't happened since the other day anyway, so she was probably going to be okay.

TURN.

What a fucking lie, you're kidding—

The doors to the house banged open, harshly knocking against the walls and startling the occupants of the dining room.

Song Hwayoung came inside the house, immediately making Eunjung receive her in a hurry and assist her with taking off her coat and setting her a pair of slippers.

Ahyeong was panicking. Why now? The universe was being unnecessarily cruel. Her body felt like a rock, cemented into the ground. The air got colder, the lights felt different, brighter somehow, as if someone was shining a spotlight down on her family, as if a grim situation was about to ensue.

Ahyeong almost got up to greet her mother, but sat back down after seeing the subtle shake of Gilyeong's head, who hastily looked down at his empty plate after Hwayoung came to sit at the head of the table.

Her mother looked like she had been trying to bottle up her anger the whole day, and the cap was finally about to burst.

Ahyeong felt unsettled at the sudden change in demeanor. Her mother had never gotten this furious before, ever. She attempted to stand, but she was glued to her seat and could only watch as Hwayoung glared daggers at Gilyeong.

She threw a stack of papers in front of Gilyeong, who shrunk into his seat when he saw its contents.

"What is this?" Hwayoung inquired, trying her best to appear calm.

The young boy mumbled a reply in a voice so small that it was barely audible.

Hwayoung flared her nostrils, "Say it louder!"

Both siblings flinched at the volume. "My report card," the youngest said shakily.

Why was her mum flipping over a simple report card? It's not like grades mattered—

"Even I know that it's a fucking report card. What I want to know is why your grades dropped to C's and D's and why the hell you're failing in math?"

Ahyeong's eyes widened, either involuntarily or of her own free will, she didn't know. Hwayoung cursing at her brother and raging over his academic report? That was quite literally the opposite of how her mother was. Hwayoung was supposed to be the sweetest person she'd ever known, understanding and supportive through every endeavor.

For a moment she considered if her mother had been replaced by a clone of a crueler version of her. With the bullshit that was happening to her right now, the theory did not even feel that far-fetched.

At Gilyeong's silence, Hwayoung scoffed, "All of this was happening and you didn't even bother telling me? I was in a phone call with your friend's mother who told me her son had scored first place but when she mentioned how you weren't even in the top ten do you know how humiliated I felt?"

She stood up abruptly, throwing her chair back, which was immediately caught by Eunjung, and scowled at the boy, not a single trace of warmth in her eyes that her daughter was familiar with, "What an embarrassment to the Song name. At least your sister fares better than you."

With that, she stalked away, heels clicking against the marble floors as she retreated to her room.

TURN .

Ahyeong got up as soon as she could control her movements, rushing over to Gilyeong whose eyes had become red and puffy as he sniffled.

She pulled him in between her arms, and he shook uncontrollably, Eunjung watching the ordeal with downtrodden eyes, wishing she could help.

This was far beyond what she thought would happen. No, that woman could not have been their mother.

As she put her brother to sleep that night, she came to a solution.

Stepping into the elevator to reach Cloud9 Officetel's terrace the next day, her resolve strengthened.

This nightmare was ending, one way or the other.

Jugyeong was quite possibly living the worst nightmare she'd ever had.

The world was too cruel. Beauty was only on the inside, they said. What a horrible lie.

She had been humiliated beyond measure. All she tried to do was convey her honest feelings to quite possibly the only person who had ever been genuinely kind to her. She would've been fine if Wang Hyunbin had simply rejected her and decided to stay as friends. But for him and Semi to destroy her pride and self-worth like that? Because of how she looked?

She felt her eyes burning with warm tears before they cascaded down her cheeks, the cold wind at the top of the building harshly biting at her skin and rattling her bones.

She shivered.

Cold, it was too cold. What a day to die.

Jugyeong's hands hovered over her phone's screen as she stared at her mother's contact. Would her family even mourn her? Good riddance, they would probably think.

But she had to tell someone, and even if her mother was harsh with her words, she still loved her. She had to tell her the reason why she was about to jump off of a building.

Just as her finger leaned down to press the call button, the door to the rooftop opened, and Jugyeong jumped in shock, turning around to see who had come in.

She did a double-take.

Was God personally consenting to her taking her own life? Because she was pretty sure he had sent down an angel to escort her soul into heaven.

Her glasses had been abandoned on the bench she'd been sitting on from when she had been trying to wipe her tears, so she couldn't really see the person properly, but even with bad eyesight, the stranger looked almost ethereal.

They were dressed in a black dress and heels, as if they had gone to a funeral, or were planning to go to one.

They stopped upon seeing Jugyeong's disheveled self.

Was God finally being kind to her in her final moments?

Mind in a haze and not thinking straight, Jugyeong broke down yet again.

Ahyeong was startled at the girl crying in front of her. She didn't think there was going to be someone else up there other than herself.

When she looked closer at the girl who was sobbing uncontrollably in front of her, she noticed who it was, immediately taking a few steps back on instinct.

Moon Gayoung? Why was she in a school uniform— oh.

You've got to be kidding me.

What luck she had, walking right into the girl this world literally revolved around.

She felt something pulling away at her in the back of her mind, sending warning bells down her spine, saying she wasn't supposed to be there. But why?

Ahyeong's heart almost burst out of her ribcage when Jugyeong threw herself at her, clutching almost painfully at her waist and sobbing into her dress.

She froze at the sudden contact, arms awkwardly hovering over the girl's shoulders.

Jugyeong had probably not recognized her yet, because there was no way she was hugging her future tormentor just like that.

"Th-thank y-y-you for c-coming," the girl said between choked breaths, "F-for being- for being here in my—" she struggled to say the words, "—my final moments."

Ahyeong stilled at that.

By the time her words had registered, she already knew what was happening.

This was the scene from the drama, she remembered, when Jugyeong had tried to kill herself because of the incident at school.

How ironic. Ahyeong almost laughed at her situation, they were here for the same fate for almost the same reason. Both didn't like the world that they lived in.

But for the Song girl, this was a test, really. A theory she came up with in the dead of the night.

The sensation of falling, that knee-jerk reaction, and the feeling of finally waking up from your dream. That was what she was hoping for. She wasn't here to die, she was here to go back to living her own life.

But the girl who clung to her was dead set on ending things, and frankly, that was a dreadful thought.

Ahyeong had no intention of leaving her as she was, be this a fictional world or not, Im Jugyeong was a human being who deserved a lot more than she got.

"Were you going to jump?"

Jugyeong's thoughts came to a halt as the Angel asked a question, the oddly familiar lilt of her voice bringing a strange mix of foreboding and warmth in her gut.

Still shaking, she only nodded against her shoulder.

"Why?"

"Because-" she sniffled, tightening her arms around them, "because everyone hates me," her voice faded at the end, and her wobbly knees gave in, making her sink into the hard floor and dragging the person along with her.

This time, the Angel wrapped her arms around her, rubbing soothing circles into her back.

"Jugyeong, things may seem horrible for you at the moment, and you have every right to be upset over what was said and done, but it is impossible to know answers to such questions when you're so overwhelmed."

The words cut through her haziness, her cries slowly stopping as what they said registered in Jugyeong's mind.

"You don't really want to die, do you?"

It felt weird, being told such things by a stranger.

Maybe deep down she had already known, but her despair had overtaken her senses and disregarded her common sense.

"Why were you really about to call your mother?"

Because she was hoping someone would stop her. To make sure someone really did care about her despite appearances.

The Angel patted her back, and slowly pulled away, only to firmly place their hands on Jugyeong's shoulders.

"Your family's waiting."

She didn't need to be told twice.

Maybe God was kinder than she thought.

It was getting dark now.

The cold evening air nipped at her skin as Ahyeong stood on the edge, heels digging into the concrete as she gazed down below.

What a hypocrite she was, telling all those things to Jugyeong.

She'd sent her home with a taxi after their ordeal, and Jugyeong had not even looked at her once through the whole thing.

She didn't know why.

The road was buzzing with activity, cars zooming past on asphalt, people walking home on the footpaths, vendors selling seasonal goods by the side.

It seemed to be a normal day.

She wondered how the rest of their day would go if her body suddenly flopped down there.

Gooseflesh rose on her arms. All of this was too real.

She slapped herself, the stinging spreading through her numb skin and making her wince in pain.

What was she doing? Was she really about to jump off a building just to test a theory out?

What if it failed? The pain in her cheek would pale in comparison to what would happen should she fall.

And the people waiting for her back home, thinking she was off paying her respects to an old friend. Gilyeong and Eunjung would be destroyed.

Ahyeong stepped back. No, she couldn't do this. She wasn't planning on dying today. Or anytime soon really.

She'd just have to get used to living here—

TURN.

Song Ahyeong stepped closer to the edge of the building, awaiting her doom.

What the fuck!? She didn't want to die, shit, shit, shit—

The LED screen behind her lit up in hues of pink and purple, colorful shadows falling on her dress that did nothing against the frigid wind.

Jung Seyeon's face graced the billboard in the distance, an ode from the people to celebrate the day he was born, and an apology for being the reason he died.

One more step and she would fall. No, no, one more step and she'd fall—

Ahyeong leaned forward closing her eyes for the last time.

NO!

And so, she fell backward.

Wait, backward?

TURN.

Ahyeong barely registered the iron grip on her wrist before it was tugged hard, her stiletto losing its balance and twisting her foot at an unnatural angle.

She widened her eyes as her vision blurred, surroundings moving too fast, and braced herself for the impact on the rough concrete.

It never came.

Instead, she fell on the person who had taken the liberty of pulling her back, and subsequently saving her. Groaning, she raised her head, squinting against the bright light of the advertisement.

"What a relief," Suho breathed out.

The ColorBeauty commercial cast the glow of its neon colors over their faces, and as the faint melody of Seyeon's voice filled the silence in the air, Song Ahyeong knew that somehow, she had fucked up.

masterlist

© 2021 Alfia Sheikh, All Rights Reserved

[heartshyuck]

Pairing : Haechan x reader

Genre: angst, fluff, one sided love, best friends to lovers, college au

Synopsis: Haechan envies the person that doesn’t love you because you don’t love him. He envies the people that can confess their love to you because he can’t. So he stands at the borderline of friendship,not daring to cross.

Word count : 4.4k

Warnings : blasphemy, making out, swearing and drinking.

To him you’re beautiful. In the ways you look at him, constellations in your eyes as if you held the universe within your dark orbs. Haechan is sure God made them for the stars to envy. You’re beautiful in the way you carry yourself, confidence and elegance in each striking step you take. You walked into his heart and claimed it as yours, with your burning touches that branded him and sent sparks into his blood. It was in that moment Haechan turned from God and named you as his own. He worshipped the sweet melody of your voice, your words were his teachings and your name a mantra to his mind. He basked in your dizzying scent of vanilla, blood orange, vibrant lilies and jasmine. He was sure it was what heaven smelt like. Your lips a shrine and his own as pilgrims and the blasphemous act of tainting the dynasty that you are, was all too tempting but what Haechan was unaware of was that you were far from a god. You were the devil. The embodiment of temptation and a caged heart, you were a nightmare dressed as a daydream. When he first locked his lips with yours, passion overflowing with the eagerness of lust  was when you first accepted him as a friend. When your lips locked with his, you kissed him painfully slow, each movement burning , agonising yet addictive. You smelt sweet yet the blood, you drew from when you bit down on his bottom lip demanding for entrance, left a lingering salt to each synchronised movement. The sinful act of your tongue in Haechan’s mouth, sucking his soul out of him and leaving him breathless while every nerve ending lit on fire. The messy clashing of teeth as you abruptly changed pace always leaving you in control and always leaving Haechan on edge, never knowing what to expect is when Haechan fell in love and submit to you. One kiss was all it took and one kiss was all he got. Haechan was left to suffer and to pay for his sinful blasphemy he was left at the borderline between friends and lovers. Months went by since the night infused with alcohol and your forbidden touches went by but it’s branded in Haechan’s memory. He remembers every placement of your hand, every gaze you gave him and every sweet word that fell past you plush cherry lips. Yet he doesn’t dare to mention it, scared the friendship he’s built with you would collapse. Haechan’s learnt a lot about you over these months and one of them being you’re unable to commit. You hate being tied down, you want to draw out of the lines, you wanna smash down walls and burn bridges but you love drawing your own lines and tying your own strings. You pushed Haechan’s boundaries but wouldn’t hesitate to cut him off as soon as he crossed one of  yours, yet he worshipped you and grew a relationship  around eggshells. He knew it was unhealthy, it was toxic, yet the venom that seeped into his heart poisoning him slowly, was addictive and it once again showed how his heart belong to you. It was yours to use and abuse, you broke him into a million pieces and each sharp one puncturing Haechan but it was okay because the pain he felt was caused by you, he wanted to feel anything as long as you were the cause of it. So Haechan didn’t push past your borderline and he stayed as a friend, as long as it meant he could see you everyday, buy you coffee every morning and kiss your forehead every time he saw you, just to set himself ablaze, for it was that feeling that kept him alive. Haechan has seen many attempt to cross the line but all perish and burn out into ashes. It used to effect him at first, a haze of green jealously would engulf him each time he’d see a new man wearing you as if you were a prize, with your arms interlinked. The green would turn into red, as anger took over at how they would use you but you remained unbothered and a cool blue of relief caused all the blood reds and sea greens to subside as he saw you break heart after heart. Relief that your heart wasn’t the one breaking and as much as he hated the cage around you heart, for it was those four walls that put him in the friend zone, he thanked it every time a new man crossed the line. The difference between these men and Haechan was simple, they didn’t have any foundation to their relationship with you other than sex and that could only last for so long. After you got bored, you moved on but with Haechan there was no sex to move on from, the foundation built out of curiosity of each others well beings, likes, dislikes and every little detail soon turning into a core of fondness and care. Haechan was the only male who didn’t seem to have sex with you as his end goal, you could see it in his eyes a burning sensation but one more scarlet that lust. It was love, over the months Haechan has fallen in love with you. The way you call his name with a light and airy tone that showed your excitement off. It made every hair on Haechan’s body stand proudly at how you were happy to see him, it sent floods of dusty pink to his cheek and hazes of muted gold and pastel purples swirl around him as he feels his heart stop. He loved the way you sent him a text every morning and every night wishing him a “good day” and how you hope he sleeps well, which only in return ruined his sleep as his mind only wandered to you, eyes glued to the screen scanning over and over again to the text that was accompanied by pink hearts. The way you would say “sorry” to every little thing made every cell in Haechan’s body buzz with bliss at your cuteness. The way you casually told him that you loved him, that you cherish him more than anything and although the high of hearing these words seeped in and clogged Haechan’s brain from any form of functioning, a deep unsettling feeling would sit at the bottom of his gut as he remembers the difference in your feelings towards each other. Whilst Haechan’s love for you was an undying blue flame, in its purest form a love burning so deeply, his love felt cool and soothing. You burnt and scorched him alive, imprinting your name over the gold and silk of his skin and he would cool you down with ice running into your veins extinguishing the burning lust and replacing it with the feeling of being loved. It scares you, how the fire within you could be so easily put out just by the mere thought of him. The way he walked up to you in all his glory, sun kissing his gorgeous honey skin causing streaks of gold to glow over his sharp and distinctive features, illuminating him and causing a heavenly glimmer. So you pushed Haechan away, stealing a kiss from him and letting him suffer as he watched you kiss others breathless but none ever compared to him. Haechan had your heart leaping uncontrollably out of your chest, hitting against your ribs and begging for it to be released so it could run to him. Yet here, you didn’t have that same longing in your heart instead you felt the twisted, painful feeling of your heart aching. As if someone plunged their hand into your chest and squeezed it, as if it was being stabbed repeatedly again and again and agian. Maybe it was the alcohol but the fear of losing your fire had vanished, yep definitely liquid courage. You held onto anothers neck, swayed you hips against their’s but your eyes never left Haechan. Not as he held her close to him, one hand gently placed on the small of her back whilst the other cupped her cheek holding it in place as he kissed her slowly. It was too slow for you, every movement played in slow motion. The way his thumb gently caressed the top of her cheekbone, how his eyes fluttered shut as their lips meet and how his tongue slowly danced with hers. You sure she’s fallen in love just buy the way her knees are slightly bent, legs are soon to give in as the kiss weakens her, the way she’s desperate for more as she clings on to him, knuckles white. But you can tell he isn’t in love with her, though he treats her like fine glass too scared to touch incase it could break, the kiss lacks passion, the same passion he gave you all those months ago. It’s not her fault, your sure she’s a great person but he’s just using her, using her to get to you. He breaks away from the kiss, chest rising and falling rapidly as he catches his breath and immediately, as if his eyes were trained to do so, they land on yours. The fact you’re even looking his way is a win for Haechan but he doesn’t miss the slight scrawl on your face that you then attempt to cover with a smile. He’s used to those fake smiles but he’s seen plenty of real ones to be able to differentiate them, this smile doesn’t go all the way up to your eyes like they usually do, this smile doesn’t show off all your teeth, this smile looks too nice to be genuine. Haechan knows he shouldn’t be happy to see that smile but he can’t help it, he can’t help but get his hopes up and convince himself that you do really like him. He knows he shouldn’t be playing with others feelings just to get a reaction out of you but everytime his eyes come up to meet yours he can see the glints of dark green jealously and suddenly all his guilt dissipates. You let go of your date for the night, excusing yourself to get water in hopes of sobering up and shaking off the envy. You turn to face Haechan who still had held his eyes on you and with one quick movement of your eyes he understood and followed you into the sea of people. The movement of their bodies as the swayed to the heavy bass washed you both up in the kitchen where other things like countless red cups also ended up, abandoned. You grabbed one from the stack of unused ones and pouring yourself another drink despite your intentions of coming to get water, you had decided that if you were going to do this you needed the slight buzz to help you. You down it in one go and it burns the back of your throat causing a slight itch. “ who’s the girl?” You ask in genuine curiosity but the itch in your throat causes a strained tone as if your saying it in slight disgust but you swear it’s the itch or so you’ve convinced yourself. Hyuck raises his brow to this as he places his right elbow on the granite counter to lean against. “Just someone is my econs class” he shrugs as if it’s not important, as if he isn’t ecstatic to hear you ask about her. You know what game he’s playing at because you play it all the time but being on the opposite side of it gets under your skin. You exhale sharply out of your nose, dig your elbow in counter, placing the weight of your head on your hand as it sits under your chin whilst you slouch over and the edge of the counter that digs into your waist. You look towards the “just someone” who’s eyes are glued to Haechan’s figure, a small smile on her face, she looks in awe of him. “She’s cute” you say as she shyly waves to you now noticing your intense gaze and you slightly move your hand in a half wave gesture and then your gaze turns to hyuck, cheek now lying in your palm still supporting your head.  His eyes never left you, he didn’t even glance over at her for a second and it was painfully obvious that she really was “just someone”. “Mhm she is but cute was never really my thing” he says as he moves closer until he’s right next to you mirroring your stance, you place your head on his shoulder and he places his on yours. You can smell the strong scents of oak and  hint of fresh grapefruit that is just powerful enough to be smelt , radiating off him. You inhale it in and with a sharp exhale you roll your eyes back because everything about Haechan creates a high, a sensation of pure ecstacy and you understand just how easily one could fall for Lee Donghyuck but like every high there’s a downfall. You haven’t experienced the downfall but that’s only because you won’t fully give into to his high. Blame it on the alcohol or maybe just your desires but for tonight you consider maybe just give in. “Take me home Hyuck” and with that said he slowly moves his shoulder and stands up straight, taking your hand he leads you through the vicious waves and makes his way to the door. Passing the “just someone” without even a look explaining where he was going, you could practically feel her sadden expression around her as you were pulled passed. As soon as you stepped out the house, Haechan stopped and let go of your hand. You faced him confused but met the sight of him taking off his jacket and hanging it upon your shoulders. It was a familiar sight but this time your heart froze, you couldn’t breathe and your body felt numb yet a slight tingle was set on every nerve ending as you felt an ecstacy like no other as you finally let your walls fall. Again he held your hand tight and your heart jumped, it leaped and skipped a beat. A slight blush ran upto your cheeks but you didn’t feel hot. Haechan calmed you, he soothed and cooled you and soon you found yourself gripping onto him just as tight. To Haechan this was like a dream but the burning sensation that came from the touch of your skin pressed against his was far too real, it was just like he remembered, the same feeling that has him mesmerised. The same feeling that had him denounce God, kneeling and worshipping you and only you. This feeling is what made you his religion, his god, angels, heaven and devil as well as his hell but every part of you was adored by Haechan regardless if you loved him or hurt him. It was so much more than he remembered the warmth was a roaring fire that lit his soul on fire until all that was left was the embers. It was destructive and ruthless but so addictive, it gave him an ecstacy he seeks for, it gave an even greater burning sensation to his lungs and louder thumping to his hear than any amount drug or alcohol could offer. You were a drug. You were a goddesses. You were his world and his everything. There was a comfortable silence in the car, you and Haechan both just taking in every moment whilst you held hands. It seemed like the world stopped, like the slight noise from the wind that came through the windows was a lullaby and the slow and steady rocking of the car lulled you to sleep. You found comfort and peace in Haechan and it’s the first times your hearts felt safe but you didn’t expect it to last long, this comfort but for now you’d give in because this feeling was bliss. So you close your eyes and fully submit to Hyuck. When you open your eyes again only 10 minutes had seem to pass yet it felt like a you spent a lifetime engulfed by Haechan’s eternal blue flame, as if all feelings of loneliness, of doubt, emptiness were erased. A high that only got higher with no sense of a drop. It’s the abrupt stopping of the car which pulls you out of your euphoric state but instantly it returns as Haechan’s arms wrap round your waist as he carries you out the car, you wrap your legs around his waist, hooking your head over his shoulder, you breathe in his scent and again it goes straight to your head, clouds swirl and you feel as if your floating. You place small and slow kisses on his neck trailing down to his collarbone until finally you tuck your face away into his chest. Each one of you kisses burn Haechan, branding him as yours again and again. His heart swells at how perfectly you fit into him, how you complete him. Your scent sets his lungs ablaze and makes his vision blur, there’s ache in his heart as it fills with so much love and adoration for you with no release. Haechan opens your apartment door with the key you entrusted him with no so long ago, he’d never admit it but the happiness and pride he ft when you gave it was like nothing he’d ever felt before, it meant you trusted him. It was that moment he knew that he wasn’t going to stop falling for you. He carries into the small bathroom beside your bedroom and places on top of the sink counter. He tries to pull away but you pull him back, not ready to let go just yet. You both stay like this for a few minutes until he pulls away again, holding your chin up so he can look at you properly and slowly you both close the gap between each other. The kiss is painfully slow and soft, both holding each other as if you were made of glass. The kiss was innocent and sweet, Haechan could taste the alcohol on your tongue and it only burnt his lips even more. For you, you could taste the sweeter taste of lemonade for that’s all that Haechan drank, your heart leaped as you remembered the habbit he picked up after he met you. Haechan’s driven you home many times, placed you on this exact counter before and wiped away your makeup and places you in bed. Then he leaves but tonight you need him to stay. “Stay to night” you whispered invetween kisses and Haechan nods, not taking his lips off yours. You kiss until the all the oxygen between you two is exchanged, until your lungs are burning and you feel slightly dizzy from lack of breathing. Haechan pulls away and stares in total awe at you and you can’t help but stare back at the ethereal man that stand in front of you. You also can’t help but giggle slightly, the joyful bubbles of laughter leave your throat and as if they were contagious, a similar yet deeper sound leaves Haechan. “You’re so beautiful” he says as his lips brush against your forehead. A smile is accompanied by a soft blush and it’s the most genuine smile you’ve ever given anyone. “You should see me after I take my makeup off” you say in a laugh, looking up and placing a chaste kiss on his lips. “Well let’s take it off” he says as he reaches to the cupboard to grab some wipes. You close your eyes and gently haechan wipers away at the art on your face. Softly he wipes down the bridge of your forehead, around your eyes, the bridge of your nose, your cheeks and the finally your lips. He places a quick peck on your lips and with that you open your eyes with a smile across your face. Haechan had thought he had seen your genuine smile before but now he’s sure this is what a smile looks like. It’s the most beautiful sight he’s ever seen and it fills his heart so he kisses you again quickly just to relieve it a bit. He ties your hair back and softly rubs your face wash into your face. Again repeating the same actions. Every movement so soft and loving, you almost lose yourself in the peaceful silence and warm feeling of love. Until he spashes you with cold water, it drips down your neck and by the way your clothes sticking to you, your guessing he missed some of your face. You hear a high pitched laugh that’s so squeaky it’s almost silent, you can only assume he’s dying and rolling around on the floor by the sound of thumping that you assume is his fist on the floor. “Hyuck!” You whine out, shouting at him. You don’t open your eyes yet, afraid of bubbles still being on them. You extend your arm reaching out for the sink, waving your arm around in the air trying to find the taps. This only makes Hyuck laugh more as he sees you struggle, his heart swells as he sees you too scared to open your eyes and he thinks to himself maybe cute is his thing. He stands up off the floor, a few more giggles bubble out of his throat and he continues to help you wash the soap off your face. You smack him lightly on the chest as he slots himself invetween your legs, only make him giggle again and a smile finds it’s way on your face but that smiles wiped off when Haechan chucks the towel and hits you square in the face. “Hyuck!” You cry out again only to again cause more squeaky giggles to escape him. You slide off the counter and head into the bedroom, still sleepy, you change from the now damp clothes that were sticking to your body into your pajamas and then slip under the covers. Hyuck follows soon after, taking off his shirt and slipping on a pair of short he left here a few weeks ago. He lies next to you, pulling you into his embrace and you lay your head on his chest. You lie there in silence for a while and slowly you were drifting off to sleep, again giving in to Haechan’s love and he must have thought you were asleep but he whispers a small “I love you” as he places a kiss on top of your forehead. 4:00 stared back at you as you stared at the alarm clock, it had bearly been two hours but your sleep seemed to have left you and it’s in the silence of the night that your mind wondered to the depths of darkness. No matter how much Haechan loved you, you couldn’t love yourself. You stepped out of bed, slowly trying to shuffle out of Haechan’s grasp, trying not to wake him, and headed out to the balcony connected to your room, it was small but cosy. It lead to a view of the city’s skyline and eventually you could make out a river that flowed in the distance and the moon hung in the centre of the sky, lighting it up to reveal the millions of starts that accompanied it. You breathed in the cold night air, letting it peirce your lungs and set your skin on fire, which usually calmed you but compared to Hyuck’s touch it was nothing. You felt numb and empty again. You needed him and he needed you. He was there for you but were you there for him?, he loved you with his whole heart but could you love him with such passion and beauty ? All great highs have a downfall but the ones which show no indication are the worst. It wasn’t him that was your downfall, it was you. You could never learn to love, to trust when you didn’t love or trust yourself. Trust yourself to be good enough for him, him who was the world, the universe and everything. He gave love in it’s purest form and you couldn’t give him anything as equally beautiful back. No matter how much he insisted you were enough, you couldn’t believe him because it wasn’t enough for you. The silent sobs that were silenced by the harsh pressing of your hand upon your mouth were soon silenced by your face buried into his chest. He was there for you, again and again but all you’ve done was push him away. You don’t deserve him, he deserves better. Someone who can repay his love and give more, someone who is confident in themselves to be able to be there for him, someone who can scream they love him. He derves someone that wasn’t you. You who was broken and numb, you who only knew disastrous love, love that left, love that was empty, love that hurt, love that wasn’t love. “I don’t want to break your heart” you cried into his chest, gripping on his sleeve as he rubbed your back attempting to sooth you and calm your breathing yet all it did was make you cry more. For he was so perfect, so loving and you couldn’t return it. “Then don’t” he simply replied, placing his chin above your head, pulling you impossibly closer and you could feel his breathing begin to unsteady and fear rised and you could feel it in the back of your throat. “But I have to” you chocked out as your eyes and throat stung, as your heart clenched and your lung felt like they’d give way. As your knees felt weak and your head began to spin, as you felt empty and broken. “Why” his voice broke and you knew he was crying too, your heart sank and even more of the feelings of not be enough sat at the front of your mind as his once soft and happy tone had been replaced with the sound of soft cries. You made him cry, you made his heart break and you’ll do it again. You don’t trust yourself with someone as precious as Haechan, something as precious as his heart because here you are breaking it because “So mine doesn’t” So yours doesn’t. 

© (jisungiest) 2021. All Rights Reserved.

[kybervisions]

slight obsessions [bucky]

summary: after months of obsessing over a senator, bucky is given the opportunity to save her. he then visits her in the hospital  

author’s note: warning, warning, this will feature aspects of the u.s government,,, \\ lil bit of fluff and mentions of torture ,, just a kidnapped senator and bucky pining  ,, requests are open :) 

The security footage of your kidnapping at the fundraiser was leaked to the media. Millions watched as a prominent U.S senator was ambushed and drugged before being dragged into an unmarked vehicle. Bucky’s heart ached. “We’ll find her,” Sam, well-aware of Bucky’s infatuation with you, promised his friend.  

Bucky was unprepared to find you in the state that you were, bloody and bruised. There was a cut above your eyebrow and blood dripped down your face. Your skin was riddled with red and purple. The metal cuffs around your wrists and ankles dug into your skin and caused you to bleed. There was track marks on your arms and your knee didn’t look too good either. 

You looked nearly unrecognizable — almost nothing like the senator that so adamantly advocated for his pardon. 

“Captain?” You mutterly weakly, barely recognizing the two figures near the doorway. The drugs they pumped into you fucked with your vision and made you feel absolutely sick. You could barely keep your eyes open. Everything hurt and you shivering from the lack of warmth. 

Sam quickly ran past Bucky and his fingers searched for a pulse on your neck. Weak, but it was something. Once up close, Sam could see the multitude of track marks on your skin and his fingers gently touched them, causing you to cry, something that completely shocked you. Zemo had stopped giving you water a few days ago. 

“We’re going to get you out of here, senator,” Sam pulled out a Widow’s Bite, which he had secretly stolen from Natasha, and used the electricity within the bite to override the power source of the cuffs.  

When the cuffs opens, you were released from the vertical interrogation chair. Before you fell on the concrete floor, Bucky quickly reached out to catch you. 

“Fuck!” You shouted and startled Bucky. You bit your lip in an attempt to silence your pain. After weeks of absolute hell, you were sensitive to touch. Tears filled your eyes and you weren’t strong enough to hold them back. “It hurts,” You whimpered. You felt sick. Cold and weak and wanting to puke but having nothing in your stomach to regurgitate.

A protectiveness he had not felt since before the war consumed Bucky. Seeing you so weak and in pain filled him with both anger and the need to make you feel better. Your big, soft, and tear-filled eyes awakened his primal instinct to defend and protect. 

He acknowledged there was still something wrong with him, because even in the state that you were in, Bucky wanted nothing more than to press his lips against yours and hold you against him. 

For a short second, while looking down into your eyes, the world was quiet. 

“C’mon, man,” Sam urged them. “I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be in here when the timer goes off,” 

“Alright, alright,” Bucky agreed. “Um, can you run?” He looked down at you again. You were smaller in person. The television must make everyone look like titans. On the screen, you had such a larger than life presence. Whether it was asking questions during committee hearings or speaking out against a bill, you were imposing. 

“She can barely stand,” Sam answered before you. With all the drugs in your system, you were nearly unresponsive. “Pick her up and let's go!” 

Once they reached the C.I.A medical facility, Sharon told a room full of reporters that the senator had been found and was being examined by professionals. She did not give too much information, which was typical for intelligence agencies. 

By “being examined by professionals”, Sharon meant you were undergoing surgery because whatever was injected into your body caused you to go under septic shock. She omitted that part, not wanting to give the public further cause to worry.  

After the surgery, only family was allowed to enter your hospital room. Some of your staff was able to bypass that rule. You were still recovering, but your top aide, Winnie, had begun planning your first public appearance. 

“You’re a certified badass now,” Winnie informed you, and it made you chuckle. Winnie had been by your side since you were a congressional freshman and you loved them to death. “The corpses will have to show you actual respect now,” They smiled, referring to your coworkers as corpses gives them a bit of joy. 

“I’m sure Stern will find a reason to call me a traitor to the country,” You replied. Your strong opposition of the intelligence agencies earned you a lot of enemies. 

“Yeah, well, he’ll — ”

The door had opened and there stood a “Hi, sorry. I, uh, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Bucky stopped at the doorway. He was holding a small bouquet of your favorite flowers and scratched the back of his head, avoiding eye contact. 

“Sergeant Barnes,” You smiled. Bucky looked to you, and he’d never seen or heard anything as beautiful. He had heard you say his name a thousand time over, but hearing it in person was just swell.  

“Bucky’s jus’ fine, senator,” Bucky returned a toothy grin. You swear you had died and gone to heaven. He was even more beautiful in person. 

“Bucky,” There was a shine in your eyes when you said his name. His name sounded so pretty coming from your mouth.  

“O-kay,” Winnie chuckled and their eyes bounced between yourself and the soldier, who was just a few feet away from them. “I’ll be back tomorrow to hash out the details,” They turned to look at you and gave you a small peck on your head. “Be careful,” It was a warning. 

Bucky stepped into the room, allowing Winnie to easily slip out. 

Now that the blood and dirt had been washed out, Bucky could truly admire how striking you were. You were glowing. There were still bruises and healing wounds but they didn’t diminish your beauty. 

He set the flowers on the visitor’s chair. 

“I wanted to properly thank you and Mr. Wilson for saving my life,” You told him. He took a few more steps towards you. “W-Winnie has a press conference planned once I’m discharged, and there might be a Medal of Freedom in your future, after the Congressional Gold Medal, of course,” 

“What?” 

“Yeah,” You smiled. “It took a little bit of convincing but the bastard caved eventually,” 

Of course you had recommended him, and Sam, for such prestigious awards. It was further proof that he had been vindicated from the dark part of his history. You helped profoundly in his path to finally accepting himself, and for that, he would always love you. 

When the nightmares returned, Bucky would rewatch your old speeches for the campaign to pardon him. He felt pathetic — having to listen to a woman he had never met before passionately advocate for his freedom in order to feel better. You saw him as human, worthy of forgiveness. 

“I know they’re practically worthless in the age of superheroes, but I thought I would be nice,” 

It would be nice. “Thank you,” His smile slowly faded as the conversation took a serious turn. “For everything, the campaign and the pardon and now these medals,” A breathy chuckle escaped. “I...you never attended the ceremony,” He commented on your absence during his pardon. It had plagued his mind for countless nights. 

“I wasn’t invited,” You chuckled at the irony of it — having spent months working for his freedom only to not be present to watch it happen. “A picture leaked of me at a protest in college and they thought it would be too controversial for me to attend,” You shrugged it off. 

Ensuring Bucky’s freedom was all that mattered. Your acknowledgement was not important to you in the greater scope of things. 

“I’ll make sure you get invited this time,” Maybe you could give a speech before he’s awarded the medal. He could finally be present to hear you praise him. 

Bucky’s eyes lingered on your lips. Your nervousness returned. There was a distinct look in his eyes that terrified and excited you all the same. 

“Senator, time for your medication,” A nurse entered the room and pushed a cart with her. There was an IV set, some pills, and a cup of water on the cart and all that medicine made Bucky feel anxious. 

He was well aware of the dangers of so much medicine and he was scared. He couldn’t afford to lose you now. Not when he finally has you within his grasp. 

“The pills help with the pain and the IV gives me nutrients,” You noted the panicked look on Bucky’s face when he saw the cart. “Or so they claim,” You looked at the nurse, who was not entertained by your accusatory comment. 

“I should head out,” Bucky nodded. “And allow your drugs to be administered in peace,” You laughed, and he was quite proud of that. 

Feeling bolder, Bucky took a few final steps toward you. You offered your hand and he lightly held your wrist, stilled bruised, and bowed down to kiss your hand. It was a small and sweet gesture, but it left you an absolute mess. You held your breath and felt your heart in your throat. 

Bucky admired you once more before leaving the room. He nearly memorized how you radiated in spite of the harsh cold white light that illuminated the hospital. In that moment, he was certain you’d be his. 

[knjoodles]

learn to love; jungkook | 03

pairing: teacher!jungkook x singleparent!reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 3.8k

summary: raising your daughter alone while simultaneously watching your ex-husband live the life of his dreams away from the two of you hurts. badly. it hurts a little less, though, when you find an unlikely friend while looking for help.

lowercase intended 

01 | 02 | 04

   after dropping seyoung to her school, you sat in your car contemplating what had just happened, running your hands over the leather of your wheel. you thought it was inappropriate to be this interested in your daughter’s teacher. he was objectively handsome, his striking eyebrows and gentle dimples key features of his face. his body, well, he was lean and fit, standing taller than you with toned arms and legs. it was obvious he took care of himself very well and, from how organized the classroom was, that he was very attentive in nearly every aspect of his life. maybe it wasn’t necessarily the things you saw on the surface but what you learned from his habits that drew you to him.

  it wasn’t as if you were head over heels in love with this man. you knew what that felt like with hoseok, and this feeling? it wasn’t that. but, that didn’t stop you from giggling like a little girl in excitement over the image of his heaven-perfected facial features flashing in your mind. 

  thankful that some of your team members, like you, are also parents, you were relieved when they assured you it was alright that you’d arrive later to drop off your daughter. pulling up to the front of bighit’s shockingly large headquarters, you left your car, adjusting the bag hanging off your shoulder as you stepped in.

  your friendly coworkers greeted you kindly, waving and beaming at you. though you weren’t very social, your name flew around quite often in the workplace. your huge achievements and resilient aura while simultaneously being a single mother are what made you so popular without you even trying. your coworkers admired just how much shit you persisted through to get where you are today. you’re a tough lady, and you’re proud that it’s well known. “(y/n!)” a familiar voice sung, making you turn your head. you found a frantically waving sooyoung in front of you, dangling out of a conference room. “bang pd’s having an exec. meeting in our usual room. guess what? we have a new album to produce!” she danced as you approached her, visibly excited at this news. park sooyoung, your partner in crime. 

  even though she was two years your junior, sooyoung had been with you through almost everything. anything that currently affected you, sooyoung knew about. the two of you were joint at the hip during college, as the two of you shared the idea of naïve students to join a sorority. once you both realized how shitty it could be, you broke the ‘girl pact’ and left, renting an apartment together. from bonding over how much you hated the attitude of an idol to laughing over soju and ramen, you’d never give up a second you spent with her. she was the only constant in your entire life at this point, the only independent variable. your relationship with her never faltered, it only grew and grew so much that it’s as if your love for her is essentially etched into your heart. she’d helped you plan the wedding, plan for seyoung, file for divorce. she was your shoulder to cry on, your great escape. you could find no one quite like her who’d help you like she did. her broad, welcoming smile and simple beauty was a refresher from the caked makeup of idols wandering the hallways, just as unhappy with their look as your eyes were from having to see it. “sooyoung!” you waved back, following her inside the conference room and shutting the door behind you. sitting down at the desk labeled yours, you sat at the head seat, projector clicking on behind you. your team members surrounded you: sooyoung, yunho, euijin, namjoon, and jinah.

   “alright, cap’n!” yunho exclaimed, twisting on his swivel chair, fingers drumming his laptop’s keyboard. “what’s the plan? we’ve got a couple of unused demos from clc’s old albums we can freshen up and reuse for loona’s comeback! may i?” he suggested. at your nod of approval, he screen-shared his laptop screen to the projector, important tabs being dragged into view. 

   “great.” you smiled, pulling your laptop from its case. “yunho, leave those up there. those are all the tracks we have for the album, correct? first, i’d like to thank all of you for bringing together your top demos. after listening to your tracks, i know for a fact that we all took bang pd’s enthusiasm for the transferred girl group very seriously, and i appreciate that. second, i have made the final cuts after consulting your votes, and we’ve concluded that so what, hash, number one, oh yes i am, ding ding dong and three six five will remain on the album. one of every one of our songs has made it onto the album. congratulations! now, about logistics,” you started, your excitement for an upcoming album clouding all other thoughts. when you went to work, surprisingly enough, it felt as if you were on vacation, as if you were doing something right again. passion pumped through your veins once more, captivating the rest of your team. it was go time. 

   “fuck, you did it again, (y/n). great work.” namjoon sighed, shaking your hand as he rose from his seat. “i can’t believe we got this much done in such a small amount of time. i could’ve gone way longer, it’s a shame we had to cut it short.”

   “i know!” jinah chimed in agreement, gathering her things. “i couldn’t handle a second of what you do every day, (y/n). you’re amazing.”

   “no, you can,” you denied, correcting the both of them. “if you’re on this board of what, six people? it means you’re one of the most hardworking, competent, and passionate producers bighit has ever hired, to the point where you’re one of the heads of operations. you could all handle what i do, that’s mainly why i chose you to lead your respective sectors.” you chuckled, pulling your bag onto your shoulder. “and, i wish we could go longer, too. i have a parent meeting with my daughter’s teacher, so that’s the reason why you’ll all be sleeping early tonight.” you joked, earning a hearty laugh from your colleagues. you waved goodbye to each of your teammates, wishing them a good night and a safe drive the way you always did. this left you and sooyoung, babbling just like you did when you were younger. 

   “hey, you going anywhere tonight?” sooyoung asked, heels clicking on the marble floors.

   “i mean, i have the meeting with seyoung’s teacher. did you forget already?” you chuckled, poking fun at her. “but no, i don’t have anywhere to go after that. what, did you want to come with me?” you raised an eyebrow and watched sooyoung’s face relax, obviously thankful that you brought it up instead of her.

   “oh my god, yes,” she groaned, smiling. “my car’s being repaired and i don’t want to take an uber home. me, you, and seyoung can have a mommy-daughter-auntie night! please?” she gripped your hand, tugging it like a child. 

   “fine!” you laughed, pulling your hand away. “it would be good for seyoung to have someone while she waits for me to finish with her teacher. even though it’s fifteen minutes, she can get pretty bored and or antsy when she doesn’t have something to entertain herself with,” you thought aloud, knowing that because seyoung’s growing up, she’s more excitable and more curious about things. you silently thanked sooyoung from sparing you all the dramatic nightmares of a mother when she knows her child has to sit alone, without her. you invited sooyoung into the front seat of your car, her long legs slithering into place. 

   “have you met him already? my sister works at yooseong, she told me jungkook is new,” sooyoung explained, suddenly very invested in seyoung’s new teacher.

   “well, i did meet him earlier today, but,” you paused, face contorting to a confused frown. “how the hell did you know he was teaching seyoung?” your eyes widened, your lips forming an astonished smile. “sooyoung!”

   “i might’ve pulled some strings,” she raised her hands in defeat. “it’s just because i was curious about seyoung! my sister knows how close we are and how much i love seyoung, i practically begged her to tell me!” sooyoung confessed, voice rising practically three octaves. “but, seriously, how is he? is he a nice guy? he better be a nice guy,” sooyoung warned, fists balling. you loved how her personality towards friends contrasted heavily from the woman in the workplace. sooyoung working had an aura so intimidating and sharp she could cut, but sooyoung chatting had the aura of a big cuddle bear. 

   “he’s, well,” you started, trying to gather your words. you couldn’t say much about him, the two of you only had a two-minute conversation. “i don’t know a lot about him because, as i mentioned, we met this morning, but, sooyoung, do you know what he looks like?”

   “no, i don’t.” she shrugged. “soojung only gave me his name. what, is he scary? does he not look like he’s supposed to be there?” sooyoung pandered you with questions, her eyes and tone full of concern.

   “no, no!” you replied, shaking your free hand. “he looks fine. i just, well, i don’t know how to explain it. do you remember when we met hoseok at that party a long, long time ago?” you asked, earning a slow nod from her. “he reminds me of that hoseok. a bubbly, kind, caring, hoseok.” you paused and listened to the silence in the car, the traffic outside being the only thing preventing this conversation from being more awkward. “i... i don’t know,” you sighed, laughing at your strange thoughts. “i don’t even understand how that works! i met him for two fucking minutes and in those two minutes he managed to remind me of the one man i loved with all my heart?” you breathed heavily, recollecting yourself.

   “hey, woah,” sooyoung cautioned, rubbing a hand your back. “don’t make this teacher that personal for you. he’s not hoseok, he’s someone else, and if you keep associating him with that scum on earth you won’t ever have a good relationship with him. remember seyoung needs this, and so do you. seyoung first, and then you.” sooyoung’s hard-knock advice never failed to be your reality check. she’d always remind you of what was important so you wouldn’t get so caught up in your emotions. “i suggest you talk to him and get to know him, so you can see just how different he is from hoseok. i mean, if i had any kids, i wouldn’t let them near hoseok. he’d probably lock ‘em in a closet and sleep with his girlfriend for the thirtieth time in a row.” she rolled her eyes, slapping the dash of your car in anger. “i hate that guy. i know you don’t want me to hate him, but i do. i capital h, a, t, e him. hate.” she complained, folding her arms. 

   “no, i get it. if he wasn’t the father of my child, i’d hate him too.” you pulled into the driveway of the school, seeing students waddle off with their parents as the school day came to a close. you led sooyoung to seyoung’s third-grade classroom, the door now decorated with adorable mini paper handprints of each student, their name written in the center. in the lower right corner, you could see jungkook’s large handprint with ‘mr. jeon’ scribbled on it about twenty-six times, one for each student to write his name. you chuckled at how cute it was and opened the door, the room buzzing with excitement as parents came to collect their child. 

   “ah, ms. (y/n)!” jungkook’s head rose from the pile of homework on his desk to greet you. he stepped out of his chair and walked towards you and sooyoung, twisting his body to avoid the high-energy children. 

   “he knows your first name?!” sooyoung whisper-ashouted, awe-strucken.

   “i almost told him my last name was jung! i wasn’t thinking, i just said the first thing that came to mind!” you whispered back, panicking that you were having this conversation as he made his way to you.

   “you couldn’t remember your last name?” sooyoung retorted, utterly confused. “jesus, (y/n), seriously?”

   “yes, seriously,” you responded as jungkook finally reached the two of you. “it’s nice to see you again, mr. jeon.” you shook his hand politely, smiling. 

   “it’s nice to see you, too!” he turns to sooyoung, squinting slightly. “i don’t believe we’ve met, but you look so familiar —“

   “i’m soojung’s sister, sooyoung.” she smiled, waving. 

   “the famous soojung is your sister? of course!” he returned her friendly gaze, nodding. as you all chatted nicely a teacher entered the room, telling all children who haven’t been picked up yet to head to the cafeteria for extended care. “it’s nice to meet you. i do have a meeting with (y/n) at the moment, so may we please be excused?” jungkook, asked, adjusting his shirt. 

   “yeah, sooyoung, can you get seyoung? she hasn’t noticed we’re here yet,” you laughed, watching your daughter march happily out of the classroom. “seyoung!” you called. her head spun and her eyes widened when she caught sight of you, but her mouth twisted into an excited grin at the sight of sooyoung. 

   “sooyoung auntie!” seyoung exclaimed, running to give her a huge hug. 

   “hi, baby!” sooyoung pat her head affectionately, taking her hand. “i’ll take care of her. you guys get going!”

  and so, after all the students had left, you sat down in front of jungkook’s desk as he tidied it up, moving large stacks of paper behind him. “i’m sorry i couldn’t have cleaned earlier,” he sighed, filing through cabinets and stuffing papers inside. “when you’re in charge of twenty-six kids at once, things don’t always end up getting done very quickly.” he joked, sitting at his desk. 

   “oh, tell me about it,” you replied, laughing. “seyoung’s quite a handful at home; she’s full of beans!” you pulled out a small notebook from your purse, wanting to make sure you'd jot down everything down from this meeting.

   “i can tell! she’s very excited in class and has shown just how enthusiastic she is about the tangerine points.” he chuckled, motioning to the large counter scribbled on the corner of the whiteboard, dedicated to tangerine points. “but, today, we’re just going to talk logistics, what i should know about your child, what i should know about you, and anything else you see important. i wanted to talk about seyoung first, but, if there’s something you wanted to open with, we can start there?” he asked, opening a desk drawer and pulling out a file labeled ‘seyoung’.

   “oh, no, this meeting is about seyoung, so it’s appropriate we start with her.” you tittered, earning a laugh from the man across from you.

   “you’re funny!” he smiled, opening the file. “well, this is seyoung’s file; it has her records from kindergarten to second grade, her personal information, and any notes other teachers have made regarding her and her performance. i looked over it before our meeting, and may i just say, great job, (y/n). your daughter is amazing, she shines particularly well. she has a lot of potential, and you seem to have unlocked it in her early years! congratulations on that.” he nodded at your smiling face, turning pages of the contents of the file. “i did want to mention that, even though she does very well, seyoung is very talkative in class. not to the point where she disturbs class time, but enough for me to mention it to you. do you understand what i mean?” he asked, motioning towards you.

  you looked up from your notebook, finishing a sentence. “yes, of course.” you nodded. “is there anything you wanted me to do about this, like talk to her at home?”

   “i think that’d be the best move, just telling her that class time is for work, and recess is for play. i told her today that i needed her to listen more in class, and she assured me she’d do exactly that!” he smiled. “i’ll wait until tomorrow to further contact you about this because i’m pretty sure she’ll listen to me. i also wanted to discuss her emergency contacts? the school was going to call you about this, but once they heard we’ve scheduled a meeting, they asked me to discuss it with you.”

   “of course,” you replied, very confused. you closed your notebook, palm resting on top of it, pen in hand. “go on?”

   “after you, we have park sooyoung, kang seulgi, and her father, jung hoseok. we’d called mr. jung a couple days ago for annual information verification and a woman picked up. once we asked for him, they told us we couldn’t have his information and hung up. is the number written correctly? we want to make sure all information is up to date.”

  you sighed, angry at how you knew exactly who picked up the phone and how she has no filter when it comes to her personality. “the information i put on seyoung’s documents is up to date, that’s just his partner.”

   “oh, i see,” jungkook muttered, afraid he may have pushed a button. “i’ll let the office know, and we’ll try to contact him again. my dearest apologies for bothering.”

   “it’s fine,” you waved your hand, smiling bitterly. “you’re just doing your job! but, anyway, is there anything else about seyoung? i know the school year has just begun, so there may not be much from your end just yet, but i’m glad you can see just how gifted seyoung is. she’s my pride and joy.”

   “i’m glad she has a supportive family,” he smiled, adjusting the papers within the file and closing it, tucking it back into its respective folder. “that’s very important in a child’s life.” he stood up from his chair, prompting you to do the same. “i’m glad we could have this talk, ms. (y/n). we can call this a success!” he shook your hand firmly, smiling brightly. after gathering his things he led you outside of the classroom, presumably walking you to the front. “i’ve heard of your work for these big k-pop groups. i almost trained to be in one myself, but i ended up going to college and becoming a teacher.”

   “that’s so interesting! did you get accepted?” you gazed at him in surprise. he had the looks and charisma to be a famous idol.

   “i did! i was accepted to many, many companies, but i couldn’t leave my parents at home, so i stayed.” he explained, smiling. “it was my dream to perform, up until i got my teaching degree. i love these little ones, and i love what i do. i don’t know if performing could give me even the slightest bit of happiness that seeing bright, young minds every day offers me.”

   “that’s such an interesting story. it’s very respectable, your love for teaching. i appreciate it, deeply.” you replied, opening the door of the school for him after he finished checking out. “thank you for this!” you shook his hand one more time, this time, with confidence. 

   “no, (y/n), thank you.” he smiled, his eyes locking with yours.

  the two of you went your separate ways, him to his car in the teachers’ designated parking lot, and you to your car, where you saw sooyoung texting on her phone and seyoung snoozing away in her car seat. “what the heck happened to seyoung?” you asked, startling sooyoung with the sudden opening of the car door. she scowled at you, slapping your arm.

   “(y/n), if i didn’t love you, you’d be dead meat.” sooyoung turned her head and glanced at seyoung’s sleeping form, her head resting against the cushion of her car seat. “we talked for a little bit, but she was just so tired that she dozed off the moment i started playing some music. it’s okay, though, that means we’ll have some silence on the way back.” she smiled, buckling herself in. “how’d it go?”

   “how’d it go?” you repeated as you pulled out of the driveway, spotting jungkook getting into his car from your rearview mirror. “well, it went pretty well, i’d say. he told me about how seyoung’s a gifted child and we went over some database things as well.”

   “of course he told you she’s gifted! what have i been telling you ever since she was born? this girl is going to grow up and become president.” sooyoung whined, squeezing your free hand briskly. “what about him?” she asked, shaking her shoulders. 

   “jungkook? what about him?” you asked, stretching your neck to eye the exit you needed to take. 

   “everything! he’s more good looking than i ever imagined him to be; is he single?” she exclaimed, making you almost break right in the middle of the highway. 

   “is he single?” you sputtered, face reddening. “how would i know something like that? his love life has nothing to do with seyoung’s performance in school!” 

   “i don’t know, i just saw the two of you standing next to each other and i knew it could work out! i mean, two attractive people with a perfect height difference and similar interests? how can that not spell out love to you?” sooyoung snorted, grinning. 

   “oh, no, sooyoung,” you warned, shaking your head. “do not try to play matchmaker with me again. you remember what it was like when i met that weirdo, yugyeom, through you? are you serious?” 

   “come on, he was nice! he paid for dinner!” she defended.

   “no, i paid for dinner, he told me about his life story on the first date. never again will I ever trust you to match me with someone else.” you corrected her, the two of you laughing at the absurdity of that night.

   “it was one time!” she cackled in between breaths. no matter what it was, sooyoung could always make you burst out into hilarious laughter. “but, you didn’t answer my question. is. he. single?”

  you paused, glancing to the side. “he doesn’t have a ring—”

   “he doesn’t have a ring!” she exclaimed, shaking her fists in excitement. “no ring, no problem!”

   “hey, that doesn’t mean he’s not seeing someone! i mean, have you seen him, sooyoung? look at him! he probably has thousands of people in his messages asking for dates.” you groaned, realizing that if you did want to start something with him, you’d probably have no chance.

   “yeah, (y/n), i did see him.” she replied, looking at you. “i was looking at him, and the whole time, he was looking at you.”

—

tag list: 

@ggsmashgg @childishbxmbino @defyiingravity @fashionmusicaddict @lemynic @webroe @marvelstuck @niammain @jungcocobust-a-nut @purely-you @mekolliskiea @deepsuitcaseduckapricot​ @jdkook @babybluegguk @isyoongi @norahkimmmm @idiotscalledfriends @purpleisabela @taevkimchi @gguksnoona   @lethaljeon @cheers-lufy @kpop-addicted-nerd @namelesscat1324 @disbeeme @dammit-jjk @bxby-stay @luvelyxp @yeontanie21 @taerremotowithjin @lee-u-ne12 @princesspanda16 @cypheruby @kookie-vuitton @umiiii @coldlandsuitcaselover @kpopfromtheblock @promiseyoonkook @busansgloss @ncitydreamies @safi4x @bigbangclappin @kooks3uphoria  @niaxbts @anua13 @orca1019  @lustremyg @aurorajeons​ @shesthelastjedi​ @betysotelo18​ @hopekoya​ @beyondthescenesphotodump​

[dottielovegood]

ASMR

Elriel Fanfic. Read here on AO3

Azriel can’t sleep Elain has an ASMR channel Match made in heaven (or you know, on youtube..)

I was thinking about Elain's gift to Azriel for Solstice and how she would help him sleep if they were just regular people in our modern-day world. And thus, this chapter was born. I haven't really decided if this will just be a one shot or if I will continue with a few more chapters. Please tell me if you want more.

------------------------

Azriel couldn’t sleep.

It wasn’t a new occurrence. Sleep rarely found him, and when it did, it was tainted by nightmares. Ever since his childhood, sleep had been a battle. Other people talked about how much they loved sleeping, and how they might spend an entire weekend in bed, just sleeping. Azriel always nodded when he heard people say such things, but he never understood them. If he could, Azriel would skip sleep altogether. If he could, he would just keep going without rest.

But to his dismay, his body did not agree. It needed sleep. His traitorous body needed the thing he hated the most. This had led to Azriel trying anything and everything to fall asleep. He had tried working out for hours before bed. He had tried tea that was supposed to make you sleepy. He had tried calming music and meditation. Nothing had worked. He still woke up after an hour, covered in sweat. When he had become really desperate, he had tried medication (which made him feel like a zombie the next day) and weed (he hated it. It made him feel sick.)

He had almost given up at this point. He was in his late twenties and had come to accept his fate as an insomniac with horrid nightmares.

But maybe his fate would change tonight?

It was in the middle of the night and Azriel was browsing Youtube, as he so often did. He had started with an interview of one of his favorite musicians, and then he had clicked on a recommended video, and all of a sudden he was down the rabbit hole. He was just about to give up when he found himself watching a video about how to grow a micro garden (he had no interest in micro gardens, so he had no idea how he ended up there). He was just about to click off when a thumbnail of a different video caught his eye.

The small picture showed him a young woman in a lilac top. Her hair was the color of dark honey and she had some small freckles across her nose. But it was her eyes that drew him in. They were a light brown color, and he would probably describe them as doe-eyes. Big and beautiful and innocent. And kind. She looked so kind.

He clicked the video without reading the title. He needed to see more of this girl.

The video started with her sitting very close to the camera. There was a microphone in front of her and she leaned in close and whispered “Hello my lovelies, lovelies, lovelies. Welcome back to my channel.” The girl paused and moved her hands in front of the camera. “Tonight’s video will be personal attention and hand movements.” Her voice was soft, almost angelic.

He didn’t know what he expected to see when he clicked the video, but it wasn’t this. Azriel had no idea what he was watching, but he couldn’t stop.

The girl on the video picked up a hairbrush and started tapping the back of it with her nails. “I am going to brush your hair,” she whispered into the microphone, and Azriel could feel himself relax as she started to move the brush in front of the camera. She had added a background sound that actually made it sound as if she was brushing someone’s hair. “Does that feel good?” she asked into the microphone. Her eyes never left the camera and it felt as if she was staring into Azriel’s soul. She continued the brushing while whispering affirmations into the microphone. Azriel felt a tingling sensation that started in his neck and traveled down his back. He had no idea what this girl was doing to him, but he wanted more. He glanced at the channel name: Flower Girl ASMR.

He made a mental note to google what ASMR was when the video was finished.

He did feel a bit weird watching this though. He was just watching this girl whisper sweet things into her microphone, and it felt as if she was whispering them into his ears. She had finished the brushing and was now giving him a face massage. He knew that it was weird. He knew that his friends would laugh their asses off if they found out that he had been watching this video. Luckily, they would never find out.

Flower Girl ASMR moved her hands slowly in front of the camera in small circular motions. She smiled gently at the camera and he could feel himself smile back. He actually smiled at his phone. God, what was this video? Witchcraft?

“If you like my content, you can subscribe to my Patreon,” she whispered halfway through the video. “For only five, five, five dollars a month, you get access to hundreds of videos, and I post five new videos every week that are exclusive to my patreons.”

Never in his life had Azriel wanted to subscribe to someone’s Patreon, but he could make an exception for this girl.

While having her soft voice in his ears, he decided to scroll the comments.

Most of the comments were nice enough, telling her that she made them feel relaxed and helped them sleep. Was that what she did? Did she help people sleep?

Azriel didn’t really believe that anyone could help him at this point, but he had to admit that he did feel relaxed.

He continued scrolling, and almost wished he hadn’t. Among all of the sweet comments, there were some assholes that made his blood boil.

HybernCoolKid 4 days ago Pretty girl, but you could show more boobs. N00ds on patreon? OF?

Amarantha_utm 7 days ago Boring af

LucienV   6 days ago Just subscribed to your patreon! I love watching you every night when I fall asleep. I always wish that I will dream about you <3 ily

LucienV 5 days ago You are so pretty. Can you please make a video with kissing sounds?

MortalGraysen 4 days ago People only subscribe to you bc you’re pretty. I mean ngl I only watch your videos to look at that pretty face while I jerk off.

Azriel curled his hands into fists to keep himself from replying to every single weird comment on this video. Didn’t she moderate her comments? She could easily block words from appearing in her comment section. Why didn’t she?

The internet was full of creeps, which he was well aware of since he worked in IT. He had moderated many comment sections in his life, and people never ceased to surprise and disgust him. But he couldn’t understand why people would comment such things on this lovely girl’s video. She was obviously just trying to help people.

He shook his head in disbelief and clicked away from the comments.

The video soon ended, and another one started automatically.

In this video, the pretty girl was sitting in front of a wall covered in flowers. The microphone was still in front of her and she was using a make-up brush on the microphone. It made a swooshing sound, and Azriel could feel that tingling sensation again. He put his phone on his chest and relaxed on his bed. The swooshing sound of the brush combined with her sweet whispers made his entire body feel good. He thought to himself that he should subscribe to her channel, but before he knew it, he was drifting off.

Slowly, he fell asleep and no nightmares plagued him that night.

Azriel jolted awake to the sound of his alarm. Sleepily, he found himself cradling his phone. His air pods had fallen out of his ears during the night and he found one under his pillow and the other one on the floor.

He was sleepy, but also...rested?

He couldn’t even remember what it felt like to sleep for hours without waking up to nightmares and anxiety. Was this what normal people felt like every day? No wonder they loved sleeping so much.

Azriel picked up his phone and walked out to his kitchen to make some breakfast. While he waited for the coffee machine to brew his coffee, he leaned against the counter and clicked the YouTube icon on his phone. He searched for “Flower Girl ASMR”. Video after video with her beautiful face appeared on his screen. He clicked on one of the videos he had watched last night and decided to leave a comment. He usually never left comments on videos, but there was just something about her…

Shadowsinger 3 minutes ago I have no idea what ASMR means, but this video put me to sleep last night. I can’t remember the last time I had hours of uninterrupted sleep. Thank you!

He then clicked the link to her Patreon and subscribed to her there. It will be the best five dollars a month ever spent , he thought to himself as he poured coffee into his favorite cup.

Today was going to be a good day, all thanks to Flower Girl ASMR.

[soulwillower]

taboos and the absurd • richie tozier

(professor richie tozier x reader smut)

requested: professor richie smut 🤤

warning: smut, fingering, professor richie, dirty talk, unedited babey

[losers + reader are 20+ in this]

1.4k words

i love this and let me know if you guys want me to turn this into a lil series!

♡

on the first day of class, you’d thought that your “taboos and the absurd” rhetoric class would be a nightmare. at least, you had to expect that it would live up to it's name.

it definitely did.

your professor was insane at first glance, mostly because he refused to act like one. 

he was very young - couldn’t be older than twenty seven, and yet talked with the kind of authority that made people listen.

professor tozier swore like a sailer, comes in hung over at least one time almost every week, and flirts unashamedly with the students, always keeping it respectable and never enough to make anyone uncomfortable.

not that he could make you uncomfortable. in fact, quite the opposite. 

he claimed that his own class was ‘bullshit’ because of some reasons that were very philosophical and well beyond your knowledge of ethics. he was confusing, a really hard grader, and you were very frustrated because despite that, you still wanted him constantly. 

that’s not to say you didn’t enjoy his lectures. he was so eccentric, he was funny, and he was so fucking hot. he’d waltz into class late almost every lecture, his shirts always tucked into black jeans instead of the traditional slacks. he was very untraditional, he knew everybody in the class by name and he wasn’t afraid to give you shit for anything anyone did. mostly because he insisted the best way to win a rhetoric was to ‘submit to the obvious,’ whatever the hell that meant.

but you’re nearing the end of the semester and your hand is hovering on the door handle if his office, nervous to go in. you needed to go over your recent paper, an argumentative essay on the ethics of relationships between subordinates and their superiors. it was one of the ones listed as a possible essay topic, and professor tozier never really went much into it, but you knew you were sold. and you tell yourself it's not because you want him, but it is.

so you twist the doorknob and you walk in to see professor tozier sitting with his feet up on the desk, drumming his fingers on his chest as he stared at his screen.

he smirks that dumb smirk he always wears and you feel flustered as he sits up, “ah, ms. y/l/n. to what do i owe this pleasure?”

“hi, professor tozier. i wanted to talk about my argumentative paper.” you say shyly, taking a seat across from his desk.

he shakes his head, “it’s office hours, y/n. you can call me richie.” he says with a slight wink and you have to restrain yourself from blushing as you pull your laptop out.

“okay, um- r-richie.” you say, thinking that the name suits him very well. “i feel like my argument is lacking in drive. like, i know what i’m trying to say but i don’t know how to get it out.” you say as you bite your lip.

“well, i always say that experience is the best weapon in any argument’s case. what’s your topic?” he asks, pulling a pen from his mouth and looking up at you.

your mouth dries at his words, feeling awkward. oh, fuck. experience?

you stutter, “um, i’m writing about r-relationships between superiors and subordinates.” you say awkwardly, watching as his face contorts. he chuckles, “i see. and what do you think, y/n?” he asks you with a sly grin.

you can’t help yourself from blushing this time because you know he’s teasing you. “i’m writing that in some cases, it’s acceptable. or at least it shouldn’t be so... um, taboo.” he hums, reading over the first few paragraphs with a hint of a smile. “isn’t that the point though? it’s hotter because it’s wrong.” he says casually, as if you’re not about to scream.

“r-right... i’m, um, i’m making a point to specify sexual relationships and platonic ones.” you say in a rush. you chuckle awkwardly, adding “you still think i need personal experience?” you intend to make it sound like a joke but the way he looks at you, you want to eat your words.

he smirks, “depends on what you want. don’t think you should be writing about it if you do, though.”

you can’t stop yourself as you look up at him through your lashes, “well how would i go about that?”

“i think you just have to ask.” he mutters, his eyes mischievous and dark. “i’ve seen the way you look at me.” he adds quietly. your stomach drops, “sir, i’m sorry if i’ve made you uncomfortable, i don’t mean to make it o-obvious-“ you start to say, but he shakes his head, holding a hand up to cut off your word vomit.

“i’m not saying that at all, in fact i would be mistaken if i said i didn’t look at you the same way.” he says, placing his elbows on the desk separating the two of you. “i’m just saying... you know, for experience’s sake.” he smirks and goddamn it if you don’t swoon. you have to press your thighs together as you watch him with doe eyes.

he looks like heaven and hell all wrapped into one, and you figure what the hell, it’s worth a shot. “can you show me, sir?” you ask, your stomach swirling in anticipation.

he leans back on his chair, staring at you with a seductive look. he pats his lap, “c’mere then, princess.”

holy shit. you basically sprint around his desk and he pulls you by your hips onto his lap. your heart is beating loudly as he looks at you with hooded eyes, a grin on his face.

this is the closest you’ve ever been to him and you can smell the intoxicating scent of cigarettes, aftershave, and something almost vanilla. his lips are in a smirk as he says, “now was that so hard?”

you whimper as his large hand rubs your thigh, riding your the hem of your skirt. “what do you want, baby?” he says lowly. his fingers graze the hem of your skirt and you let out a mewl, “please touch me, richie.”

“good girl.” he mutters quietly and you can’t help but steady yourself on his knee because you think you’re gonna die.

he groans to himself as his fingers rub you over your panties, feeling how damp you are. “so wet, aren’t you?” he says, pressing his pointer finger against your clothes clit, making you bite back a strangled moan.

“you want me to finger you, sweetheart?” he asks into your neck, making you break out in shivers at the feeling of his lips on you. “please, richie. yes,” you gasp, sounding choked and just as desperate as you feel. he smirks against your neck.

“open up.” he says softly, pulling your hair away and tapping his fingers against your lips. you oblige eagerly and he chuckles lightly, slipping his fingers into your mouth. he watches you intently as you suck on his long fingers, your tongue swirling around them. he slides them out after a few moments and drags your panties to the side.

“be a good girl and i’ll let you cum.” he whispers into your ear as he slips one finger in. you gasp at the sensation and the angle as you’re sat sideways on your professor’s lap.

you look at him in pleasure and whimper as he starts to pump slowly, picking up the pace after a few thrusts.

you’re writhing in his lap once he ads a second finger and you have to grip his chest. he’s muttering dirty things in your ear and you can’t help but clench in pleasure as he rubs your clit with his thumb.

as he’s fucking you with his fingers, his other hand is holding you against his chest and rubbing your arm. “so good, baby.” he mutters into your ear, pressing a kiss to your neck.

you moan as he’s curling his fingers and hitting the perfect spot inside you, making you clentch your legs inadvertently. he tuts, pulling your legs back open and rubbing your clit harshly. “you gonna cum on my fingers, princess?” he asks, pulling your jaw you you’re staring into each other’s eyes.

you nod, words failing you as you whimper, feeling the most pleasures you ever have in your life - and hes only using your fingers. his fingers move into you expertly, deftly and roughly and you want to scream in pleasure. “richie!” you gasp as you finally cum, your body shaking in pleasure. he’s kissing your neck softly and then he’s pulling his fingers out of you, pulling your panties back to how they were and rubbing your hip.

you’re gasping, legs shaking and you’re about to mention helping with his hard-on that you can feel on your ass but footsteps outside his door make you hop up, smoothing your skirt.

richie clears his throat as you turn, but he grabs your hand and pulls you toward him quickly, pressing a heated but short kiss to your lips. he pulls away with a cocky smirk that makes you weak and your hand comes up to touch your lips. he’d kissed you. he’d just fingered you. and you loved how wrong it was. 

a knock on the door makes you jump and walk to grab your bag, richie watches you as he calls, “come in!” one of the girls from your class walks in, smiling at richie. your chest boils at her look, but you shake your head. he’s not yours and it's not okay to be jealous. you turn on your heel, walking to the door on shaky legs.

as you reach the door, richie calls out, “my door is always open, ms y/l/n. i hope to see you again soon to go over more content.” he sounds professional but as you turn to look at him, his face is more suggestive than you’d ever seen. the other girl seems to think nothing of it as you wave, mumbling a “th-thank you, sir.” before you slip out.

[1994sunflower]

can i request something very angsty, for heaven to you? y/n has a pregnancy scare and tells her best friend, and her friend thinks michael wouldn’t be a good dad? 💙

this isn’t completely angsty/as angsty as i could’ve written it but i think especially with how the last part of the story ended, that’s a good thing. 

i really loved exploring this part of their relationship though! thanks for the request.

in which you have a pregnancy scare

The knocking on Maia’s door was frantic. So much so that you worried she would be too frightened to open the door. But in this moment in time, you weren’t sure you knew how to be calm.

Your fingers hurt with how tightly you were holding the drugstore bag in your hand. The plastic rustled and it just served to make your already quick heartbeat thrum harder against your chest. Everything felt like it was different, your world suddenly felt alien to you.

You were going to knock again when the large door swung open and Maia stood staring at you with wide eyes. She looked very comfortable with a tank top and jean shorts, her dark skin glistening perfectly with the leftover pool water from her dip in it just a few hours before.

She looked nearly like your perfect opposite at that moment. Because while she looked like that, you had a frazzled look in your eyes, your hair was strewn messily on your head and you were wearing one of Michael’s old t-shirts with sweatpants.

“What is going on?” She said, her chocolate eyes furrowed in concern. “What are you doing here?”

This was your chance to share with someone, someone you trusted, for the first time the suspicion you’ve been having for weeks now.  

“I think I’m pregnant.” You blurted it out so quickly you weren’t entirely sure you even said it.

But if you weren’t certain by your own cognition, you definitely were with how pale Maia’s face had gotten and how her mouth widened just as much as her eyes did.

“What?”

You entered into her familiar house even though she was still frozen in shock in her doorway. You didn’t bother waiting for her to snap out of it so instead you walked into her living room, shaking your head.

“I don’t know, I’m not sure. But my period’s really late and it’s usually so consistent.” You were still rambling when she walked in behind you. You placed the bag on her coffee table and took out the three different boxes of pregnancy tests you had bought. “Can I just find out here? Please?”

Maia wasn’t completely all there when she nodded. You could tell because her nod was slow and her eyes still looked as if they were waiting for you to say it was a joke. You couldn’t blame her, out of your group of friends, you were the last person anyone expected to get pregnant before getting married.

Even for you, it was a shock to even be in a scare right then. It wasn’t something you wanted right then and it wasn’t something you thought you’d ever have to worry about. You were careful and you knew the risks. But yet there you were, hyperventilating in your friend's house.

You had so much of your future left and a baby was not in the plans, not yet at least. It felt like everything you had planned so carefully for yourself was in very real danger and the fact that it wasn’t something you could control, in fact that it was an unknown right then, was terrifying. Your entire body felt like it was drenched in ice cold water.

But it wouldn’t be unknown for long. In just a few minutes you could know. And this entire nightmare could be over, maybe you’d even wake up in a cold sweat and this really would be all a dream. You took pointed breaths because without focusing, you felt like you couldn’t breathe.

Placing each test right after the other on the counter of Maia’s private bathroom, you didn’t know what to do. Should you stare and wait in the bathroom until all the tests revealed the answer that could change your life forever? Or should you leave and talk to Maia.

Your body knew that answer more than you did as you felt yourself reach for your phone. Once your hands grasped it, your eyes fluttered in dread. You knew what you had to do.

It wasn’t that you were afraid of Michael’s reaction, that he wouldn’t want to be involved, that he’d get mad or freak out. You knew he would be supportive no matter what. You picked a great boyfriend and you knew it. Hell, he might even be excited. He had spoken of getting you pregnant more than once and you knew even just the prospect of it would send him into a frenzy. It’d be the fact that you could be starting a life, a family together.

You could almost hear his protective words asking you if you’re alright, if you feel healthy or the way his eyes would darken at the thought of the kink you two shared finally, finally coming true. Everyone would know just exactly who had gotten you knocked up and his proud smirk he would wear would be the confirmation everyone needed.

But you didn’t want to get his hopes up. And frankly, you weren’t sure if telling him would make you confront the small part of you that wanted the same thing he did. Because a much bigger part of you was horrified by it. You weren’t ready, you needed to establish your career first. You needed to finish college first.

And there was always that risk that all those times he had talked about starting a family with you had been just a kink and nothing more. It was hot to think about, not so much to actually experience. There was that very real possibility that he didn’t want this and that it could ruin your relationship, irreparably so.

You took a deep breath, mostly to convince yourself before clicking on his name. No matter how it went, he should know. He had a right to know. And you knew he would provide the confidence and comfort you needed to get through the next few minutes of your life. The ringing sound of the FaceTime call was the only sound to convince you not to hang up, it was too late. He would be answering any second.

And right on cue, the ‘connecting’ came on screen followed shortly by Michael’s familiar and loving face. You almost melted right there as he smiled at you through the screen. His hair was in a black beanie and you could hear faint music in the background of his room. He looked great and content. You didn’t really want to think of just how much you were about to rock his world.

“Hi, princess.” His words were relaxed until he saw your face, your eyes stinging with unshed tears. “What happened? Are you alright?”

Your hands were shaking as you pushed some of your hair behind your ears, your nodding looked mechanical. When you spoke, the choked back panic was very obvious, especially paired with your watery eyes. “U-um, yeah. I just-I need to tell you something.”

Michael remained silent, nodding for you to continue. You could see the way his eyes ran up and down through the screen, likely trying to find anything physically wrong with you. His jaw was set and rather quickly, he became the serious Michael he was most of the time. The one that tended not to show much emotion and the one who intimidated anyone in his presence. The one everyone walked on eggshells around. Which definitely was not helping your already nervous mind.

In fact, as you took a few deep breaths to clear your throat enough to even feel capable of talking, your head felt like it was filled with static. Though you’d said the words once already, this time it would be very different. It could change everything, make it so much more serious. Because you’d be saying them to Michael, the father to your possible child.

“I think I might be pregnant.” It was hard to say it without crying or without stuttering, especially with your heart beating that fast in your chest. Harder still was forcing your breathing to keep steady. Your entire body was frozen as you waited for Michael’s reaction, hoping and praying that this wasn’t a big mistake.

Watching Michael face go slack for just a second, you feared it was, but then his eyes (which had begun staring off into the distance) snapped back to his screen, to you. And there was a lightness, and excitement, in them that had you releasing a relieved breath.

“Really?” Michael’s voice was even slightly higher than you’d ever heard it. A smile he was unable to hide taking up much of his face. “We’re going to be parents?”

You managed a small smile back. “I’m not sure, I’m at Maia’s right now and I’m going to take a few tests…”

“Let me know as soon as you find out.” Michael cut you off. His fingers ran through his hair, “Holy shit. You’re-You’re perfect, baby girl….You might be giving me a family. Something real. I love you so much.”

Your heart constricted tightly in your chest. You’d never seen him excited, and you were sure if you told anyone else of what you were witnessing they would call you a liar. The happiness he was exuding was contagious but it was also dangerous. Dangerous to feel hopeful or to want to feel hopeful. You’d been so adamant on not wanting it, but seeing your love’s face lit up with emotion and love for you quickly melted all that away.

It wouldn’t be so bad anyway. Michael would be amazing with you and your hypothetical baby. He was loving, protective and would be active and present. Best of all, he wanted this, he had let you know that on multiple occasions and he loved you enough to make everything work, including the plans you had already made for your future. It could all work out.

You nodded to the screen, “I’ll drop by after.” You promised.

Michael’s eyes watched your face carefully, wanting to memorize every bit of that moment. It wasn’t a given, there was still the possibility that you weren’t pregnant. But even just the thought of the chance was enough to send his thoughts running wild.

“Fuck.” One of his hands went to his forehead as if that could calm down his thoughts and emotions. “If you’re pregnant your stomach’s gonna get so big. And everyone’s going to see…know I’m the father.” You saw his eyes darkened as his mind strayed further into the fantasy. “You’re really going to be mine. Forever.”

You were smiling without meaning to. This is why you were so hesitant to tell him because now, you were seeing a part of yourself arise that wanted this just as much as he did. You wanted to start a family with him, be with him in an even deeper way than before.

Maia’s knock was what pulled you from that dream and back to the moment, to reality. The reality where you were very much still afraid and frazzled about how much your future could change in just a few moments. But at least now, you knew Michael would be there for you. Not for the first time did you feel lucky to have him as your boyfriend, as the man who held your heart.

After promising Michael (again) to let him know as soon as you knew anything, you hung up and opened the door.  Your best friend entered the small bathroom and immediately made here way over to the bathtub, sitting on the edge of it. You didn’t miss the way her eyes fixated on the pregnancy tests on her counter before her eyes turned to you.

It wasn’t shame that made you look down to the floor as you made yourself comfortable by sinking down to sit, leaning your back against the counter. But it was a form of embarrassment. You couldn’t even imagine what she thought of you, though it wouldn’t be judgement, it might be disappointment. And you weren’t sure which was worse.

Maia was quiet for a moment before talking, “So? Are you preggos or not?”

You still couldn’t look at her when you shrugged, “They’re not all done yet, I only want to look when they’re all ready.”

Maia nodded, biting at her lower lip. “Well, considering everyone thought  I’d be the first one in this position…..this is a pretty fun turn of events for me.” And when you didn’t laugh and her comment didn’t lighten the mood as she hoped, her shoulders slumped down. She was nothing if not a good friend. And she’d do anything to make you feel better, even poke fun of herself. Usually, it worked. Usually.

But since it didn’t now, she switched back to the more responsible, older girl that she was. “Y/N, how are you going through this right now? You were the responsible one, what happened? Do you not use protection?”

Your cheeks burned as you looked up at her, offended. “Of course we do! I’m on birth control.”

Maia hummed, her accusing tone was gone. “Does Michael know?” At your nod, she narrowed her eyes just slightly. “And you’re still sure about him?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Your eyebrows were furrowed and you felt her words wound you deeply.

“I mean there’s a difference between messing around with someone like him and actually starting a family and having him be a father to your children.”

“Maia.” Your tone was low in warning towards your best friend. You weren’t sure you wanted to hear the rest of her thoughts, especially when anger was already starting to bubble up inside you. “I’m not just messing around with Michael, he’s my boyfriend and I love him.”

Maia shook her head and scoffed as if you were naive. “I’m not trying to offend you, you know I love you and want the best for you. That’s why I’m telling you Michael is not that, at least not for this.”

You knew she was never that fond of Michael. She’d met him a few times and each time you could see it in her eyes that she didn’t like him. But she tolerated him for your sake. You just never dreamed that it ran this deep.

“Y/N, be honest, do you really think he’d be a good dad?”

You got up then so that she would have to look up at you instead of the other way around. Your eyes were ablaze. “I do, actually. He’d be an incredible dad. And for the record, he’s already supportive, he’s excited.”

Maia stood up herself, her hands taking yours, trying to make you see her point of view. “I know you love him, okay? I get it even though I don’t…get it. I see the way you love him and he does care for you, I’ll give him that. But think about it. Do you really think someone that aggressive, mean and violent could be good for a child?” Her eyebrows were furrowed and she ever let your own, no matter how much you wanted to look away. “I’ve seen the way he acts, he can be cruel. I just don’t think a man like that is ready to have a family, let alone with someone like you.”

“He’s never been violent to me.”

You couldn’t help the tears in your eyes. Her disparaging comments about someone you loved so much that you had dreamed about starting a family with was painful. Even more so that it was coming from someone you had at such a high regard because she was there for you throughout your entire life. You’d known each other since elementary school. So how could she be trying to tear down something so beautiful and pure in your eyes like your relationship with Michael was?

Could she be right? He was a lot of what she said. He was mean, violent and at times impulsive. Part of you knew she had a point. You didn’t grow up in that type of environment and you wouldn’t want your kid to either. No matter how much you loved Michael. Your heart felt constricted at the thought. Were you really making a wrong choice by making all these plans with something who wasn’t good for you in the long run?

Suddenly, all the reassurance Michael had given you, the confidence you had dealing with this mess was torn away. In its place was insecurity and a looming sense of doom because if you were making a wrong decision, then nothing in your life truly made sense to you.

But you couldn’t help but think that he wasn’t that way with you and that was what mattered. He treated you like you were made of glass and he loved you so strongly that it was all you needed, all you ever wanted. And if truth comes to shove, you weren’t ashamed to admit that you liked how different you were. You liked how you were his soft spot, the exception to all of his dangerous antics.

Michael was your rock. He protected you and supported you through everything. The pure adoration and love in his eyes when he saw you made you feel like you were the only girl in the world. The way he treated you, gentle and sweet compared to the rest of the world made you feel like a queen. He protected you even from himself, refusing to let you do anything dangerous or see him at his angriest because he didn’t want to scare you. He was your perfect opposite and you each brought out the best qualities in the other. He was perfect for you.

She didn’t know him.

“He’s been arrested, Y/N. I don’t even know how hasn’t flunked out of university by know, honestly. But you? You actually have a future, you can do everything you dreamed about. Don’t let his excitement to bring you down with him mess with your mind.”

You snatched your hands out of her grasp sharply. Your face was scrunched up in anger at the girl in front of you, the one that was supposed to understand you and support everything you did. Not shame you for everything you loved. You were used to it by now. Most of the people in your life had told you their opinions on Michael but never so cruelly.

“How dare you.” You yelled. “You don’t know anything about my relationship or about Michael. He does nothing but support, encourage and love me and all of my accomplishments. So yes. I do think he’d be a good father. He’d do anything to give me and our..” You chuckled humorlessly, “hypothetical family everything. Michael has proven that he wouldn’t abandon me for anything and he wants me to reach all of my dreams, not try to ‘bring me down with him.’ He didn’t get mad or break up with me when I told him like all of your bad choices would have if you were in my position. He gave me the reassurance I needed that everything would be okay, either way this can go.”

“Y/N-” Maia said but you weren’t done.

“So don’t you dare tell me my boyfriend would be a bad father or that he isn’t good for me. Because guess what? I’m planning on marrying him, on making a life with him. Whether it’s now or not, get used to the idea.”

The tears were streaming down your face freely. You had come to be supported not to be shamed. All you wanted to do was be in Michael’s comforting arms, feel protected in his presence and be made to laugh and feel loved in the way only he was capable of making you feel. That was how you knew Michael would be a good dad. And that was why, when your phone’s alarm went off, you didn’t feel that large dread looming over your head. Either way, you’d have Michael. If you were pregnant, you’d be able to make a family with him. If you weren’t, you’d be able to finish your plans and start a family with him in the future. There was no losing.

No matter what everyone else thought.

☼

When you unlocked the front door of Michael’s home, the last thing you wanted was to see Ashton sitting on the couch with three other boys. For once you needed privacy with Michael but it seemed that wasn’t possible.

Your only solace was when Michael opened the door to his shut bedroom. You saw the way the boys on the couch all turned their eyes to him, greeting him in a way to show that they had been hoping to see his face all along.

But unfortunately for them, the stone faced Michael didn’t even glance at them. Instead, he went straight to you and you felt your heart swell as you looked up at him. Just feeling him near you, even looking so serious and cold like he usually did in front of others, made you feel better about the conflicting and emotional day you’d had. But they did bring back the jarring words Maia had used: dangerous, aggressive, reckless. You shook those thoughts away. That wasn’t who Michael was, it wouldn’t the environment you would be raising your child in if you were pregnant, you knew that. Or maybe you hoped that.

You let him wrap his arms around you and guide you into his room, keeping you closely at his side. He didn’t let you go until you’d gotten inside and he closed the door. He held you at arms length to be able to fully see your face as he leaned against the now closed door.

“Well?” His eyes scanned your face, looking for any sign of what the tests had said.

But all you did was shake your head before walking into his arms, loving the way his arms immediately wrapped around your small frame and held you closer. His chin rested on the top of your head as he leaned down over you.

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled against his gray t-shirt.

“For what?” His heartbeat was steady and you felt comforted by it.

“You were excited.” And you couldn’t deny the tinge of disappointment you felt when Maia turned over the tests for you, since you were too nervous to do it yourself, and they all read NEGATIVE. It was a good thing, really. You knew that especially when Maia sighed in relief and hugged you as an apology. But you had allowed yourself to imagine sharing something to precious with your love and it was hard not to think about what could have been. Even if it wasn’t at a good time for either of you.

You felt Michael shake his head before he buried and nuzzled his face deeper into your hair. “Only because of what it meant. But it’s okay. I’m not disappointed, little one. I know you weren’t entirely ready for it. It’ll happen, I’m gonna get you pregnant eventually. You’ll carry my children one day and we’ll have a family together. You’re going to give me a family.”

Your heart was soaring at his reassurances, the way he held you so right that you couldn’t imagine feeling insecure or upset in his arms. Not when he was so understanding and there for you through everything. How could Maia or anyone think otherwise? You hadn’t totally forgiven her when you left her house. In fact, you barely spoke unless it was to say goodbye. But if anything she was was true it was that you weren’t ready. But you would be.

Pulling away from his arms, your hand ran up and down his shoulders and chest. Nodding, you smiled up at him through tear rimmed eyes. But they weren’t sad tears like they were in Maia’s, they were proud tears. Pride that you had chosen the right boyfriend, one that would always put you first.

“We’ll get there, just not anytime soon.” You didn’t tell him about Maia or her comments, it would hurt his feelings even if he’d never show it, make him insecure in a way you never wanted him to be. So you didn’t mention it as if it didn’t exist because you planned on filing it in your memories just like that, something that didn’t happen.

Grabbing his wrist, you pulled it so his hand was to your stomach with yours on top of his. “And you’ll get to see me nice and round for you like you always say. Make everyone jealous that you made me like that.”

Michael’s eyes were surprised to hear those words come out of your mouth, his kink had always been something only he brought up. But it seemed that it was now something both of you shared. Especially knowing that it would cheer him up because no matter how much he wanted to act like he was unaffected, you saw the way his shoulders slumped just slightly, you felt the slowness of his actions to hug you when you walked into his arms. 

He was just as disappointed as you were, if not more. Because he would love nothing more than to see you pregnant with his child, to show you off to everyone to see that he, no matter how fucked up he was, had the best thing in the world to call his own - you. They’d all see just how much you loved each other, how much he tainted you, how good he made you feel, filled you up with his cum. And you, amazing as you were, were giving him the best gift of all - a family.

But right then, he groaned possessively under his breath before moving down so his lips were close to yours. His hand running along the span of your stomach. “That just gives us more time to practice, right?”

You couldn’t help but laugh against his lips as he kissed you. The earlier doubts Maia had planted in you were gone. There was no doubt in your mind Michael would be your husband and father of your children. And he’d be a great one. Even through the differences between the two of you and what others see in him. 

Even if Maia’s words still echoed in the back of your mind.