#god this is stupid 🤣

[tommyscurls]

When the 217 engine sees 118 <3

[mugiwara-lucy]

This dumbass istg 😂

[dadattebayo]

Is he real at all? I’m a grown ass woman and here I am feeling like a teenage girl

[shmothman]

Confessional

Pairing: Wolfwood & Reader, Vash/Reader Rating: Explicit (for language and discussion of explicit topics) Words: 773 Tags: gender neutral reader, Wolfwood's stupid portable confessional, trigun 98, reader has a crush on Vash and thinks it's unrequited, Wolfwood is my best friend who makes me want to punch him in the face A/N: this isn't really crack but it sure is stupid!

“You’re brooding,” Wolfwood says, coming to lean against the siding of the building next to you.

You shoot him an annoyed glance. “I'm not brooding.”

He plows forward like he didn’t hear you. “It’s about needle-noggin, ain’t it?”

“No,” you lie, “it’s not.” It’s not about him, or the way you wish he felt even an ounce of what you feel for him, or the way he was so close to you last night while he was drunk and now is keeping a careful distance. It’s not about any of that. Of course it’s not.

“It’d probably help if you confessed your sins,” he says, pulling out that damn ‘portable confessional’ with a shit-eating grin that makes you roll your eyes at the best of times—and now just makes you scoff.

“Yeah,” you reply with biting sarcasm, “I’m sure it would.”

“Come on,” he says, grinning wider. “You know you want to.”

“Not a single part of me wants that, Nic. I don’t even know the however-many-sins-there-are.”

“Seven,” he supplies helpfully, ticking them off on his fingers: “pride, sloth, greed, gluttony, wrath, envy, and—“ he winks at you— “lust.”

You laugh, incredulous. “Right. Okay. You know what? Fuck it.” 

His eyebrows shoot up in surprise as you snatch the confessional from his hands, putting it over your head and crossing your arms over your chest. If he’s gonna be an ass, you’re gonna make him regret it. 

“You wanna hear me confess my fuckin’ sins, Nicholas? Here: hey, father, I’ve been lustful as hell! I can’t even look in his general direction without getting horny! I can’t stop thinking about making out with him, and every time he pulls a trigger I think about his fingers inside me! I wanna fuck him six ways to sunday, in every position imaginable, over and over again until neither of us can walk for days!!” You can’t see his face right now, but you hope you’re making it as red as yours feels—though, damn him, it does feel good to confess this shit to somebody. Even if that somebody is Wolfwood. “I am lustful every minute of every goddamn day, and especially every minute of the night. And, hey, Isn’t masturbation a sin? I’m super guilty of that one. Like super guilty. Like every night guilty. He so much as smiles at me and I’m gonna jack off about it. I want to ride him like a goddamn Tomas, and you know what? I’m so in love with him, it hurts!”

…Well, you’ve sort of lost the plot, now. And you’re feeling much less confident than you were ten seconds ago. You pull the stupid box off your head and hold it back out to Wolfwood, jaw set and face flushed. 

His eyebrows are still sky-high, but he doesn’t quite look like you’ve embarrassed him… just yourself.

“There,” you say with finality. “That’s my confession.”

“Hi guys!” the voice behind you makes the blood drain from your face. Come on. You feel the warmth of him as he comes up behind you—you feel his presence, like you always do. “What’s up?” Vash asks.

Wolfwood’s eyes dart to you, then up to meet Vash’s gaze as he grins predatorily. “Oh, they were just telling me something really funny.” He cocks his head at you, and you want to wipe that damn smile right off his face. “Hey, why don’t you tell Vash what you just told me?”

You’re going to kill him. You’re actually going to kill him. Glaring daggers, you do your best to make your tone cheerful, though it sounds forced even to your own ear. 

“Oh, it really wasn’t that funny!”

“Sure it was,” Wolfwood says, smug as all hell. “Made me laugh, anyhow.”

You grind your teeth.

“I’m sure it was funny, I wanna hear it!” Vash says, and Jesus Christ, why did you ever open your mouth?

“Yeah, he wants to hear it,” Nicholas taunts.

You take a deep breath. “Oh! Hey, uh, I just remembered that Meryl and Milly need me for—um—something! Gotta run!”

With one final death glare thrown Wolfwood’s way, you turn on your heel, pointedly not looking at Vash as you make your completely un-smooth exit—you can’t let him see the way your face is burning.

God. Wolfwood’s never gonna let you live this one down.

Vash frowns as you leave, sure that he’s stepped into something, but not sure what. “What was so funny, Wolfwood?”

Nicholas claps him on the shoulder, the portable confessional set down on the ground. “Believe me,” he says, slipping a cigarette between his lips. “You’re gonna wanna hear it from them.”

[shy-nightmare]

Had another dream again. @weaselnerd, @lastofautumn, @imaginarytoon1, and everyone else who liked my dream posts, you guys know what means 😉

STORY TIME!

This GIF does not belong to me. It belongs to @mhall070. I give credit 😊

This time, I'm in the Terminal Bar Station with Roger and these two old flames. We're just sitting and chatting, pals being pals and all that good stuff. Eddie turns to me and says, "Kid, you gotta keep postin' your chapters".

💢 SIR, DID YOU NOT HEAR ME?! YOU HAD YOUR TURN ALMOST A WEEK AGO! I SAID WAIT! 💢

And Roger, our lord and savior, defends me. He frowns at Eddie and is just like, "Eddie, come on! She wants to go at her own pace, for herself and her friends! Be patient!"

Yeah, see Eddie?! Roger knows what I'm talkin' about!

Thank you, Roger 😊

Guys, I joke you not. They keep haunting me in my sleep! Somebody save me and call the Ghostbusters 👻! My house is haunted! 😱

Damn, Eddie's being salty with me. Well, guess what, Jack Daniels? That's what you get for disrespecting the twins! 😤

These people keep torturing me into posting more than one of my chapters. Like, OK, do you guys still watch Looney Tunes? I just found another classic yesterday called "Racketeer Rabbit" directed by Friz Freleng starring Edward G. Robinson and Peter Lorre.

😆, they're like Bugs tricking Rocky into giving him the money 🤣

Smartass: How about me, doll?

Me: Oh yeah, one for you!

Greasy: And me, Chiquita!

Me: 😑...fine, one for you

Wheezy: And me, luv.

Me: OK, sure. One for you!

Eddie: And me, Shy.

Me: 😑 You already had your turn. Shoo

Jessica: 💋 How about me, darling?

Me: 😳 M-Ma'am, your turn is next month for Chapter Four, but I guess I can make an exception. Here you go!

Roger: What about me? 🥺

Me: Of course! Here you are. Thank you for your patience, kind sir! 😊

Baby Herman: Hey! What about ME?! 😠

Tom, grabbing Herman by the nape of his neck and kicking him out of the window: Scram!

Thank you, Tom 😊

Psycho: And me, Shy!

Me: One for you, too!

Stupid, shyly tapping me on the shoulder: Duh, what about me? 🥺

Me: Stu, my sweet precious potato 🥔 teddy bear 🧸, I will give you all the chapters you want, you adorable innocent baby 👶*pours all my chapters on him like a waterfall*

Doom: ...How about-

Me: GET THE FUCK OUT!!!

[scrawlingskribbles]

not me blearily waking up at 5:30am almost in tears bc I had a dream that Ian had apparently been making more little OK KO shorts on the side and the utter joy I was feeling as dream!me was scrambling to find & watch them only to wake up before I could........ :((((

[riricitaa]

I don't even know what the hell is this 🤣 but enjoy

Based on this 🤣

[jjohhuii]

this stupid novel. MANNNNNNNNN

[marciliedonato]

Submarines are the new guillotine 😩💅 modern problems require modern solutions... Happy pride!! We eatin the rich <3 hope u were hungry 💞💞

[bitchy-peachy]

Me: if you eat that candy from that altar you're gonna die or wish you were dead.

They: *laugh*

Me:

[mugiwara-lucy]

So the MAGA folk are losing their minds over the fact that RFK Jr has dropped out of the race and is in their camp.

And my reaction?

Like RFK Jr was NOT this beloved paragon prior to yesterday. The vast majority of people thought he was a weirdo because of his ear worm nonsense. Couple that with him being an anti-vaxxer who had a problem with a Confederate statue being removed and him STAGING A BEAR’S DEATH BY HIDING IT:

He fits RIGHT IN with those weirdos in MAGA like Majorie Taylor Greene, Laura Loomer, JD Vance and of course Trump himself.

The FUNNY things are two actually!

1.) MAGA thinks that his 5 percent of voters are gonna join their side BUT I highly doubt it. Why? He was meant to be an INDEPENDENT candidate meaning he was against both Democrats and Republicans so they may just not vote.

2.) His family sees this as a BETRAYAL to his father:

Trump is the antithesis of what his father stood for so…he really is an embarrassment.

Anyways I just had to share my thoughts and remember….NOVEMBER 5TH LET’S VOTE BLUE ALL THE WAY DOWN THE BOARD SO MAGA CAN GO AWAY!!

[eulchu]

It’s Day 5 actually. He hasn’t streamed in 3/5 of the days for his own event (though he has been active on the server) and has the fucking GALL to complain about his server members

.lol

[360kscope]

girl help the horrors

[xumoonhao]

the8 // performance team vcr, '17 Japan concert

[rookthorne]

Omg! Merry Buckmas to you! Merry Buckmas to us!!! This is just amazing! Everything looks incredible I don't know where to begin! Thank you so much for doing this ☃️❄️🎁🎄

nonnie, I swear to fuck, I’m gonna reach through this screen and smother you in a hug. I really am. I hope you’re prepared to have a fiery red-headed ball of Aussie fury coming at you.

this was… this was the best thing I could have ever gotten in my inbox 😭

I worked so fucking hard for this. I really did, well above any other events this year, and to read this? I can’t express how much it means to me.

you are a treasure and imma hoard you. you’re one of my favourite chaos kittens, whoever you may be — thank you, thank you so fucking much 🥹

I am now off to catch some much needed sleep with the biggest smile on my face thanks to you. I just wanted you to know. 🥹

[castlebyersafterdark]

I keep telling myself to finish the two wips I have half written with decent progress, but every day my brain says... no... work on the DnD Renn Faire roleplay fic... do it...