#give the sun vitamin d
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ziipzeepzop-eez · 1 year ago
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OHHHOHOHOOOOOOO
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Commission for the lovely @agentturtlecupcake of Sunflower and Gen!! I loved drawing them, oh gosh, look how cute they are ;_;
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caricature-of-a-witch · 2 months ago
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I know I complained about the 30+ degree heat and all but can I. can I have it back. it's been raining off and on all day and there's maybe been 10 non-consecutive minutes of sunshine and if I thought the heat was draining my energy it's nothing compared to being cold and everything being grey and lightless and what do you mean it's only going to get colder and greyer for a few months and then only really slowly brighten up again how am I meant to function through all that I'm already tired
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youredreamingofroo · 5 months ago
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everyday I wanna do something, be someone, go somewhere... and then I get hit with 94°F weather and go back to my hole.
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mintesprig · 1 year ago
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Everytime I have a weird dream where I’m a vampire, I inevitably end up here:
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thatkirbynerd · 1 year ago
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Shoutouts to the pepperman gijinka I never like, figured out if i wanted to keep him as an oc or keep the gijinka because I liked the design too much but I dunno what I'd do with him anyways that's why the 1st page looks like that but frick it we ball ig it's a gijinka now (ft that vigi doodle I posted a while ago)
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organised-disaster · 6 months ago
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I'm bloody hilarious because in that drawing of Sera I posted
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I included the scars on her face
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The scars and callouses on her hands
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The scars on her thighs and the TEXTURE OF HER SOCKS
BUT I SOMEHOW FORGOT HER DAMN LEG HAIR
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noirapocalypto · 6 months ago
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I think im gonna save up to get a little porch added to my tiny ass mini-house
With those screen meshes because I really don’t want to keep getting harassed by bugs each time I try to sit outside at night, especially now that we’re getting those fat brown water bugs.
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emdotcom · 6 months ago
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Self-improvement time. I got me some melatonin gummies, to try & cure the fact I cannae sleep on time (they're really tasty).
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bunnyb34r · 1 year ago
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Love love love when it audibly rains and you can hear it patter on rooftops and down the side of the house ❤
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straykidsgallery · 2 years ago
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SKZ Talker Go Ep. 13 - Felix ☀️
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sunshine
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sittinwithyou · 1 year ago
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This is my aesthetic.
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rafeskiss · 4 days ago
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juno ! ᥫ᭡
pairing: rafe cameron x fem! reader
word count: 980
summary: boat days with rafey make you so fucking horny<333 based on the song ‘juno’ by sabrina carpenter
warnings: no actual smut, use of y/n, mentions of pregnancy, alcohol, probably more i dont fucking know
authors note: IM BAAAACK! bringing back the short n’ sweet inspired rafe fics
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boat days with rafe were your favorite days. you didn’t have to be sexual with rafe to have fun together, and you guys had your own way of showing appreciation— which, of course, included sex some days, but you also just got each other.
your love for each other was showcased best on the druthers on hot and sticky summer afternoons. you’d be tanning and feel a lack of warmth for a second, opening your eyes to see rafe towering over you, blocking the sun. a fruity seltzer in his hand, he’d hand it to you and you’d continue tanning. you didn’t ever have to tell him what you were thinking, he just gets it.
or he’d let you apply sunscreen on him— this was a rarity. he claimed he didn’t care if he got burnt or not, and you’d always reply with something along the lines of ‘you will care when you get skin cancer in 20 years!’ so you’d stand on your tippy toes, rubbing the white substance on his face, chest, back, arms, and legs until you saw fit. this was also a perfect excuse to feel him up. you hated his father, ward, for giving him life-long daddy issues but this was one of the only times you’d thank him. God bless his dad’s genetics, because rafe cameron is one sight to see and feel under the north carolina heat. beads of sweat dotting his face and chest, small freckles appearing on his nose and how gorgeous he looked driving the boat.
today was one of those days; you in a tiny pink bikini and rafe looking particularly fuckable edible hot pretty. you watched as he steered the boat towards wherever the hell he was taking you, his grip on the steering wheel showing off his toned, muscular arms. you just about melted in your sun chair rafe layed out for you.
it was days like this where you seemed to be so in love you’d do just about anything for him. rafe was too busy steering the boat, leaving you alone in your thoughts as you soaked up the vitamin d. you often thought about your future with rafe, and rafe doesn’t talk about the future rarely ever, but you knew he’d want your touch for life. he hasn’t and probably won’t ever come out and directly say he wants to spend forever with you, but his words always allude to it.
you never take the things he says during sex seriously; he’s always grunting about putting a baby in you or telling you to never ever leave him— you wouldn’t dare— but you wonder if he really truly means it. however, this doesn’t stop you from hinting at the fact you would like this all to become a reality. he’d be picking you up to go to dinner and you’d do a little twirl, showing off your dress. he’d tell you you look great, just like always, and you’d be like ‘well, there’s actually one thing missing…’ rafe would grumble something like ‘fuck are you talkin’ bout, kid? you’re fully dressed.’ and you’d stick your left hand out to him, showing him your naked ring finger. ‘missing a rock right there.’ and he’d roll his eyes and tell you to get in the damn truck.
you hopped off the tanning chair and found your way to a mini fridge that’s always stocked with various drinks. you opted for a twisted tea and you grabbed rafe a beer. you giddily walked to find rafe who was standing by the steering wheel, one hand on it and the other glancing down at his phone.
“here ya go,” you smiled and handed him the glass bottle.
“thanks, baby.” he said while placing a kiss to your temple, turning his phone off.
you looked at his hands on the steering wheel, noticing the lack of a wedding ring on his hand. you frown, “looks so boring right here, right?” you look up at him, your finger pointing to his ring finger.
“can you just wait?” he scolded.
“i just think this day would be even more perfect with a mini us running around!” you declared, looking around the boat imagining a tiny rafe or a tiny you waddling all over.
he rolled his eyes and continued steering the boat.
“like, one of me is cute but two though?”
rafe laughed, “are you ovulating or something? holy shit,”
you smiled and planted a kiss on his cheek, “can’t help it.”
“jus’… gimme time, baby.” he muttered before taking a sip of his beer.
so maybe having a baby at 19 wasn’t the best idea. but there were far worse things you could be doing with your life! rafe has enough money to support you and the baby until the end of time, including your retail therapy and regular therapy, so what is so wrong with that?
“give me one good reason why we can’t have a baby right now.” you said, crossing your arms which only made rafe take this conversation less serious because his eyes were immediately drawn to your tits.
rafe smirked, “shit, i dunno. i will say, your tits would be massive with a little baby in you.”
you gasped, “so you do wanna have a baby!”
“never said that.” he sniffed.
rolling your eyes you said, “whatever. god forbid i want a future with you!” you stormed off leaving rafe behind you.
of course, rafe didn’t want to hurt your feelings so he apologized very thoroughly later. he made sure to tell you that he did want a future with you, but he wants you to enjoy your young adulthood before potentially wrecking your life and freedom by bringing a baby into the world. in response to this, you stuck your tongue out at him.
“see, who needs a fucking baby when we got you around?” he said teasingly.
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TAGLIST (reply to my tag list post to be added)
@xcinnamonmalfoyx @neediestpuppy @ethanthequeefqueen @maybankslover @pankowblues @drewsphswife @wearemadeofstardust0
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hiisikoloart · 2 years ago
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Why do all good tasting D-vitamin capsules, gummies, tablets, and liquids cost more than some legit medication I have?
I'd love to eat those tasty gummies every day but they legit cost almost 30€. There is conspiracy theory somewhere here....
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geostelar5 · 1 year ago
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Acclimation is actually an insane thing that our bodies do and its amazing how rapidly we adjust to a new environment.
It's like "Oh you wanna live in a place where the average temperature is literally 10 TIMES hotter than we're used to with almost 100% humidity so sweat isn't as effective? Ok give me a few days to adjust than we're good just some more sweat as we get used to it"
"What the fuck you wanna move to a place that's THOUSANDS OF FEET up in the air? A place without enough OXYGEN for you to function fuck...Ok give me a few days to MAKE MORE BLOOD AND MAKE YOUR HEART BIGGER then you'll be alright."
On a generational basis it's even funnier cause within a few dozen generations we can actually adapt to like any environment. People from Africa and Aboriginals are usually darker because Melanin acts as sunscreen in a place where they get too much sun and during a time where people didn't wear many clothes or have indoor shelters like today.
But as humans migrated north to latitudes where the Sun isn't constantly raining down an endless beam of death and cancer and started to wear more clothes due to it being colder they started lacking in Vitamin D and that leads to a whole HOST of other health issues related to births, cancers and other shit so we started lessening the pigment in our Skin in order to get as much Vitamin D that we can. This happened within a few generations as far as we're aware and like this shit is happening on a SUPER Fast biological scale.
For a kinda poor metaphor, the rate at which humans adapt to massively different environments to best live in is like how Speed runners can complete OOT within like 5 minutes compared to the 27 hours it takes to beat casually Edit:So apparently I am a dumbass when it comes to tempreture as the way we measure tempreture is not in fact liniar and is more logrimtic in nature than I was led to belive by math. There isn't a 10X increase in tempreture. But still you can go from living in Norway in the Winter to the Tropics/Sahara in a short period of time and our bodies adapt concerningly fast
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jscajones · 1 year ago
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AN INCOMPLETE LIST: THINGS I LOVED ABOUT THE RWRB MOVIE
Henry complimenting Alex’s cologne in the storage closet
The way Henry pauses and gives a look after Alex asks “have I surprised you in any way?”
The way Henry is looking at Alex when Pez is telling Nora “you are the most exquisite woman I have ever seen in my life”
The way Alex is so distracted he forgets who he’s talking to because Henry is in his sightline
Alex nervously trying to figure out how to stand before Henry comes into the red room
tHE WAY THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER WHEN HE COMES INTO THE RED ROOM
The look Henry gives Alex when he walks out of his bedroom i.e. “I am very, very gay”
“And I thought Alexander Gabriel Claremont-Diaz was a mouthful” “He is” and the fucking LOOKS
“Can he ever belong to someone else?” “Only momentarily”
“Would it make a difference if I told you not to see him again?” IMMEDIATE NO
Alex at the beginning saying royalty in the 21st century is so antiquated…..Henry saying the same thing to Bea later
“I would never call you a coward”
The SHIT-EATING SMILE Alex gives Henry in the V&A when he’s putting his arms on his shoulders and making him dance, the little shit
HISTORY, HUH? BET WE COULD MAKE SOME
Henry waking up next to Alex the next morning and his lil smile and the way he leans into Alex’s arm around him
Alex finally calling him HRH when he’s telling the world he loves him
Zahra’s face pretty much the entire movie but especially when Alex is literally waxing poetically about Henry’s eyebrows
Also how curly Alex’s hair is in that entire scene
The fact that Alex is wearing his ring
LOVESICK HOMOSEXUALS
Touch me and die
BABY
& Henry’s sweet relieved baby face after he hears that
Collapsing on the stairs like the drama queens they are
THE FACT THAT ALEX IS WEARING HIS RING
Alex watching Henry play piano like the sun shines out of his ass and he has a vitamin D deficiency
Yankee Doodle
Alex’s slutty ass tight shirt
Alex’s pecs (I’m fine)
Henry’s smile when he notices Alex wearing his ring and fiddling with it in the same way he used to
They went out onto the balcony and they cried and I cried
CASEY MCQUISTON, PRESIDENTIAL SPEECH WRITER EVERYBODY
Yellow roses
That long ass hug
Henry looking like a lost little puppy on the stage until Alex takes his hand
OPEN HEARTED, FEARLESS, AND ALIVE
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rambling-at-midnight · 4 months ago
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omg a part 2????
i loved it so much!!!
Ahh I'm so glad you liked it!!! It's my first Jason x reader fic :) Here's a part 2!
Pros and Cons of Midnight Snacks (Part 2)
Pairing: Jason Todd x Gender Neutral Civilian!Reader
Summary: Now it’s time for a meet-ugly-ish with some dude named Jason. Also, you see the Red Hood again.
Word count: 6.3k (holy shit)
You’re not crazy, right? It’s weird that the library is completely empty because it closes in two hours and the weather is actually nice outside for once, and some random dude wanders in and sets up two seats down from you. He’s not even here to study; he pulled out a sci-fi novel as soon as he sat down.
Who comes to a GCU campus library to read recreationally? The seats are uncomfortable and plastic. And the sun is shining. Everyone else is outside soaking up the Vitamin D.
Honestly, you’re mostly surprised the chair he’s on didn’t snap as soon as he sat. The dude is huge. Football player huge. Shouldn’t he be at practice, instead of forcing the chair to make the most irritating squeaking noises known to man every time he moves an inch?
You grit your teeth and put on your headphones, but you can still hear the poor chair’s dying lamentations, so you turn on an instrumental playlist that hopefully won’t distract you too much from studying.
You let yourself stew over the annoyance until your stomach growls so loud you hear it over the soft music. He has the good grace not to look at you, but you definitely see him pause.
Okay, you’ll call it even. This is what you get for running to the library right after six hours of classes. You need to cement the knowledge in your mind while it’s still fresh, and if that means you have to forego lunch…
He’s still there two hours later when the closing time alarm goes off. It’s a shrill old-school bell, the kind no one can ignore, and he jumps like he’s never heard it in his life. The poor chair finally gives up. He tumbles to the ground.
You look over in case he needs any help, but he’s scrambling for the book, face bright red.
If he is a football player, you wouldn’t be surprised that he’s never heard the bell before. That sort rarely stays this late at the library—if they enter at all.
He rushes out. You pack up a little more methodically. All that’s left for you to look forward to tonight is trying to study in your apartment, but you never have much luck.
He’s outside the library on his phone when you walk out. Maybe waiting for a ride? You’re a little on edge from the events of two days ago, so you watch him out of the corner of your eye as you walk away.
Thankfully, he doesn’t follow you.
At least the library closes earlier on Wednesdays, 6 pm instead of 9:30. You don’t know why. It’s still a weekday. But it forces you out while the sun’s still shining, which is probably a good thing.
Within two minutes of the twenty-minute walk home, your hip hurts. By the ten-minute mark, you’re trying not to limp.
Despite your better judgment, you keep your gaze turned to the rooftops, even though you know the vigilantes are nocturnal. It’s stupid to want to see a flash of red helmet, anyway. The Red Hood probably saves hundreds of people every week; there’s no way he would remember you.
Of course, when you finally get back, there are the stairs to contend with.
Your cat, that ungrateful little beast, beeps at you furiously for being gone so long. Never mind that your roommate works nights, so at most the cat’s been alone for an hour. He makes a break for the hallway, and you box the doorway with your legs and slam the door closed against your hip as you slip through.
Your injury explodes with pain, but at least the cat doesn’t get out. Ungrateful little beast. As if he isn’t fed and loved enough.
You finish slipping through the doorway and just stand for a moment listening to the blood rushing through your ears. Damn, but that hurt.
In the bathroom mirror, you hike up the hem of your shirt and check the state of your injury.
All in all, it could have been much worse. The bullet scooped out a fair chunk of skin, but it was just a surface wound. There’s no fresh blood on the gauze, and when you change the wrappings, the skin is pink and raw but starting to scab. It scooped out a chunk and left a trail of bruising, but you got off fairly lightly, all things considered.
The GCPD released the robber’s mugshot yesterday morning. In the picture, the man’s eyes were so swollen from your pepper spray he could hardly open them.
You preferred the bullet, honestly.
You try in vain to study a bit more, but even after you take more painkillers, you’re not in the mood. You feed your cat, then curl up on the couch to watch a couple episodes of the show you’re currently in the middle of.
That was the first time you see the huge guy, but it’s certainly not the last.
You wouldn’t notice him so much if he wasn’t the size of a damn refrigerator. He’s gotta be a linebacker for the Knights, but he’s not on their roster. You looked it up after the third time he wandered into the library just a couple minutes after you. It’s probably not updated yet, but you see him so often, you’d like to know his name.
Also, he’d bleached a patch of hair right at the front of his head—was that a trend now, or something?—so it wasn’t hard to spot him.
On Saturday, your feelings shift from mild annoyance and curiosity to a sinking sort of dread when you notice him at the coffeeshop you always visit on the weekends. The employees know you by name and use it to call out your order, so now he knows it, as long as he’s paying attention.
You think he might be.
You don’t want to be that person. Not everything in the world revolves around you, obviously. But you might still be shaken from what happened on Monday, because the thought wiggles in the back of your brain: what if you have a stalker?
You try to tell yourself that it’s just paranoia. GCU isn’t that big a campus, after all, and there are only so many places in the city that are: A. close to campus, B. reasonably priced, and C. comfortable to work in. You’ve run into classmates here before, and you don’t have a monopoly on the library or this coffeeshop. Just because he shows up at the same time you do doesn’t necessarily mean anything. He might be establishing a schedule that just so happens to line up with yours.
But, you have to admit, it is easier for stalkers to stalk people when they know their regular schedule.
You keep a watchful eye out and are pretty good about keeping off the streets after dark, but a week and a half later finds you stranded an hour’s walk from your apartment. The buses worked for two days, then shut down again, and you foolishly believed that following the detour that said would get you home would actually get you home. You don’t want to call an Uber because traffic would make the ride longer than the walk and bankrupt you in the process. Same reason you can’t call anyone to pick you up unless you waited the two hours until rush hour dies down.
Walking is, unfortunately, the best option.
So you clutch your trusty pepper spray and prepare yourself for a long night of looking over your shoulder and ignoring the pain in your side. The wound has mostly closed, although the bruising has gotten worse.
Three minutes later, you hear the roar of a motorcycle followed by angry car honks. You barely pay it any mind until the motorcycle pulls up next to you and doesn't pass.
You keep walking, avoiding eye contact. Maybe ignoring them will dissuade the rider from catcalling you.
It doesn't work. "Hey," the rider says, and it's only because the voice is mechanically distorted, recognizable only because of how many videos of him that you won't admit to looking up the last week, that you look at him. "What are you doing?" asks the Red Hood.
"What are you doing?" you counter. He's blocking the flow of traffic talking to you.
The Red Hood looks over his shoulder, flips off the person honking behind him, and steers his motorcycle onto the sidewalk. He drives fast, and you flinch in case he tries to run you over, but he screeches to a halt at the last second.
"Haven't seen you in a couple of weeks," he says casually, like you two meet up often.
"I've been staying out of trouble," you say.
"Not tonight?"
"No. That wasn't my fault, though. I took the Southwest bus because it was supposed to connect with the L line, but all the signs they posted were a lie, apparently, because—" You cut yourself off. "Never mind, I'm sure you don't care. Point is, I'm walking home. It's not too far."
"It's about an hour," he points out. "How's your bullet wound? Will it object to that walk?"
"I'll be fine."
He pats the back of his motorcycle seat. "Hop on. I'll drive you."
You take a couple hasty steps back. It may not be a white van, but you know better than to follow candy into someone's vehicle. "Oh, no, thanks. Traffic's pretty bad right now."
You get the sense he's smiling when he says, "I bet I can get you back faster than walking." If only he wasn't wearing the stupid shiny helmet, you would be able to read his expressions better.
"Really, I'm okay. I'm sure you have better things to do than drive me home."
"Helping people is literally my job," is his response. "I have to make sure you get home safely. So either you get on the back of my bike, or I follow you the whole walk back to your apartment."
You know a losing battle when you see it. As a general rule of thumb, it's usually smart not to argue with the dude carrying at least two guns. "Don't kidnap me," you order before slinging your leg over the seat.
He chuckles. It's the first time you've ever heard him laugh, and it makes him sound so much younger. "You can't ride like that."
"Like what?"
He cranes his neck to look back at you. There's at least six inches between both your bodies. You clutch the sides of the seat with both your hands, hoping he doesn't take off with such a lurch that you topple off the back. "I drive fast. You'll have to hold on."
"I am holding on."
"To me."
You've only met the man twice. You're pretty sure clinging to someone's back is at least a third-meeting type of touch, but he reaches back. The Red Hood snakes a hand nearly twice the size of yours into the crook of your knee, then yanks you to him. You shoot forward with a strangled yelp and catch yourself on his back.
You've never before understood the phrase 'wall of muscle,' but you get it now.
He is huge. And strong. You gingerly put your hands on his shoulders. That's not an inappropriate touch, you think.
He has to live at the gym, right?
"You're still not holding on," he chides. "I don't have a helmet for you, so you really shouldn't fall off."
You swallow and move your hands, but he's too thick for you to link your hands around his front. So you fist both of them into his jacket. It presses your bodies tight against each other from shoulder to thighs. Through the layers his body radiates heat, but you shiver.
"Going," is all the warning you get.
Then you're gone; the bike shudders beneath you, then takes off like a jet.
You can't catch your breath. This must be what riding a dragon feels like, is your first nonsensical thought, a side effect of your roommate's obsession with Game of Thrones.
The bike roars beneath you, but you can hardly hear it over the rush of wind and the pound of blood in your ears. You can't see much with the wind drying out your eyes, so you press your head against the Red Hood's back and squint to one side. Cars and street lamps blur together into a stream of mismatched lights and colors.
The Red Hood drives fast. He weaves between lanes, runs through red lights, cuts onto the sidewalk. A couple bikers shake their fists at him when he passes them in the bike lane. A lot of cars honk at the two of you.
Judging by the way his shoulders shake with laughter, he likes pissing them off. You have to admit, the feeling is a little intoxicating.
You can't hear the sound, but your front is plastered to his back. Even with the layers of his suit and leather jacket, you can feel the vibrations of sound deep within his chest. He has a fairly deep voice, after all, unless the helmet changes that.
No less than ten minutes later, he parks abruptly. You lift your head, blinking moisture back into your eyes, and stare dumbly at your apartment building.
He'd actually brought you back.
Maybe he really was reformed.
You stumble off the bike onto unsteady legs. The Red Hood kicks his stand into place and rests against the bike, leaning with elbows on his handlebars. Like he expects a Midwest goodbye. And you find yourself dawdling.
Maybe you want one, too.
"Thanks for the ride," you finally say awkwardly.
"Anytime," he says, and you laugh, thinking it's a joke, but he doesn't. After a brief awkward pause, the Red Hood tries, "So how have you been?" as if you're old pals meeting up for brunch, and the question is so ridiculous coming from a sort-of-reformed crime lord slash serial killer that you respond without thinking.
"Pretty good, except I think I may have a stalker."
His helmet doesn't do a great job translating whatever sound he makes in response to that. It comes out as a crackle. "What?"
"I've noticed this dude recently showing up wherever I go," you say. "But I think it's just a coincidence. Sorry. That was a bad joke." It wasn't, but you don't want to accuse someone without proof of stalking you. If he's not, you'll seem self-obsessed. If he is, then he knows that you know, and it's not like the GCPD will do anything. One of your friends from your hometown had a stalker for literal years, and the police never did anything, even after he sent her death threats. They said there wasn't enough proof to make an arrest then, so someone showing up at the same places you are definitely isn't enough proof now.
The Red Hood tilts his head. "Does he make you uncomfortable?"
"You don't need to beat him up or anything on my behalf," you say. "I mean, you've seen me with a bottle of pepper spray. I'm pretty sure I can handle myself."
"I know you can," he says. You can hear the smile in his voice, like he finds something about the situation funny. "And I'm pretty sure that you know that I'm going to check this out anyway."
"No," you say, surprising yourself with your firmness. You can't rely on vigilantes to solve all your problems for you. "Seriously, it's okay. Thanks for the ride. Maybe I'll see you around."
"I'm counting on it," he calls as you walk away.
And he's right. Two days later finds you at the gas station at ten-thirty at night. You don't want to see him, per se. You're definitely not looking over your shoulder at the slightest sound. You definitely didn't check the parking lot for a notorious red motorcycle on your way in, and you certainly aren't taking peeks out the window every time headlights pass by on the street.
You're just... curious.
Maybe.
But you have absolutely no warning, not even a suspicion that someone is behind you, when you reach for a box of Cheez-Its. Someone else's hand gets there first and you nearly jump out of your socks.
"Hey," the Red Hood wheezes. He's clutching his side like he has a cramp. "Question: if I buy these for you, will you patch me up?"
"What?"
"I may have been cut," he admits. Judging by the angle of his hunch, it's a little more serious than just a 'cut'. "So: do we have a deal?"
The thought occurs to you, as you help him up five flights of stairs to your apartment, that you're escorting a strange man into your place of residence. You haven't even given your roommate a heads-up, though you're pretty sure tomorrow's his night off.
Sure enough, the only person there to greet you when you walk in is your cat. As per usual, he tries to escape. The Red Hood gently but firmly ushers him inside with his foot with such ease he must have one of his own. "It's cute," he says, still clutching his side.
"Thanks," you say. "He always tries to get out, but if he actually escapes then he just freezes in the hallway until I bring him back inside." Then you realize that you're discussing your cat, of all things, with the Red Hood. You clear your throat and say, "Let me take a look at you."
The crime lord and cat trail after you into the bathroom. It gets a little cramped because the Red Hood's about as small as a fridge is small, but you two figure out a passable system: he's too tall, even while sitting down, and you don't want to bend in half while you stitch him. So you sit on the toilet, he stands in front of you, and your cat jumps on top of his leather jacket on the counter to observe and judge. Luckily, the suture kit is still in the bathroom from when you thought you would have to stitch yourself up, so it's not long before you're instructing him to lift up the hem of his shirt so you can see the damage.
You hiss between your teeth at the sight. Someone grazed his side with a knife, by the looks of it, but the wound is deep. It might go all the way to his subcutaneous tissue.
After you clean it off, you're sure that it does. "You call this a cut?"
"I've had worse," he says gruffly.
"And you're still alive?" You squint at him.
He huffs like that's funny.
"They basically cut you in two! I don't know if I can fix this. I've never stitched someone up before!"
"What do you mean?" He tilts his head. "You stitched yourself up, remember? You told me you would."
Shit. Of all the ways to stick your foot in your mouth—
"It wasn't that bad," you say weakly.
“It looked pretty bad.”
“It just looked bad because I was wearing a light colored shirt. Don’t worry; I’ve learned my lesson.”
The Red Hood scratches under your cat’s chin. “About wearing light colored clothing, or about getting shot?”
You’re trying to thread the suture needle, but the stupid thread won’t cooperate. “Hmm?”
“Which lesson did you learn?”
“The former, mostly. Believe it or not, ‘try not to get shot’ is something most people, including me, know intuitively.”
"Let me see."
"Yeah, right," you say, "my apartment's basically a strip club, isn't it? First your shirt's coming up, then mine. Absolutely—" You slap his hand away— "Not. I'm fine. Now hold still while I stab you."
The process goes by quickly. He stands like a statue the whole time, like he's used to the pain of getting stitches. Considering his profession, he probably is.
Actually, you can see a couple healed-over scars on his torso just from the small bit of skin he's revealed by pulling up his shirt. And, you're pretty sure, a perfectly defined six-pack, but that's none of your business.
"I don't have the fancy dissolving sutures, unfortunately," you say while you tie off the thread. "These should come out in about a week."
"Yeah, I know," he grunts, letting his shirt fall back down. And you're not disappointed. At all. "Same time next week, then?"
"What?"
"To get them out."
"Uh." Your brain stalls out. You'd been operating under the assumption that this was just another freak coincidental run-in.
Is it just you, or is the Red Hood looking to make a friend out of you? Or maybe just a free pseudo-surgeon?
"Sure," you say. It's not like you can stop him, really.
"Thanks," he says, stroking your cat one more time. Then he nudges the pest off his jacket and shrugs it on, even though there's not really a need for it. The weather's been pretty mild the last week.
You walk him out the door. He pauses in the hallway, turns, and says, "By the way, what's your name?"
You tilt your head and tell it to him.
"Nice to meet you," he says. Then he walks away.
You watch him walk down the hallway until your cat escapes, and then you have to chase him. You're pretty sure the Red Hood sees it, because low-pitched laughter hits your ears as you gather the little bastard up, but when you look, the vigilante's gone.
"God, I hope he's up to date on his tetanus shot."
You find yourself at the coffee shop the next morning, determined not to let a buff bookworm change your routine. You're the first customer, and they have your order ready by the time you finish setting up your stuff on a small table in the corner of the shop, far from where the line will build up when more people trickle in.
Like clockwork, the bookworm wanders in just a couple minutes after you do, orders two coffees, and settles down across the room with his front to you.
Every time you glance up, he's utterly focused on his book. He's probably not watching you. Right?
Fifteen minutes later, the coffees untouched, he stands up. You watch out of the corner of your eye as he picks one up, approaches the counter, and...
Walks right past it.
Walks in your direction.
You stare blatantly, and he holds your gaze with a set jaw and something a little challenging in his gaze.
He's walking to you.
The coffee cup slams on the table, splashing a little over the edge, and you jump to move your laptop away from the liquid.
"Shit, sorry," the bookworm says. He runs away.
You stare until you realize he's grabbing napkins and hurrying back. At least ten, even though the spill's pretty small, and he piles them all onto the table.
His face gets redder the longer you watch without saying anything.
Once he's absolutely sure your laptop is safe from the couple drops he spilled, he balls them all into one large fist and rushes out, "I'm sorry—I was supposed to meet my brother here, but he canceled, and your drink cup's empty, so I was just wondering if you wanted this one? It's a little warm, but..."
"But free is good," you say, deciding to put him out his misery. And he certainly looks miserable rambling in front of you. Like he's mortified for some reason. "Um, thanks. What..."
"Just an iced coffee. Probably watered down."
You take a sip, just to be polite. It is watered down, but he didn't add any milk to it, so that's probably a good thing. "Thanks..." You tilt the cup to look at the name written on the side. "Jason?"
"Yep." He nods. He's still standing in front of you, like he wants to be invited to sit, but you have a lot of work to do, and he's a complete stranger, and all his stuff is still on his table across the room.
Something clatters behind the counter. You both turn in time to see the two baristas duck out of sight, whispering furiously. Probably about the spectacle you two are making.
"You go to GCU's campus library a lot, right?" Jason asks suddenly.
"Yeah, I do. So do you." You don't phrase it like a question.
"Yeah," he says. "It's peaceful to read in there. Quieter than my apartment."
"Okay," you say slowly. You're really not interested in this conversation, but you don't want to be rude.
He must understand you, though, because he rubs the back of his head and steps backwards, mumbling something about getting back to his book.
Jason's brother never does end up meeting him. You tell yourself that's why you keep glancing at him. Once or twice, you two peek at each other at the same time, and you always look away first, face hot like he's caught you doing something wrong.
The next time you go to the library, it's packed. The weather has turned, so students have nothing better to do than prepare for their finals. You head to the quiet floor, slowly losing hope that you'll find a seat.
A head snaps up the moment you walk in, dark-haired with a striking streak of white at his forehead. Jason.
Something like relief passes over his face, and he waves you over.
"I saved your seat," he whispers, dragging his bag off of the chair.
"Thanks," you say, actually touched. "You didn't have to."
He shrugs. "You're my reading buddy."
The next day, he's sitting at the library's entrance when you walk in. Jason shakes his head. "All the seats were already taken when I got here."
"Ugh." Strictly speaking, you don't need to study tonight. You're pretty confident about the next test's material, and you're also pretty burnt out.
"We could check out the Student Center?" he suggests. As if it's a given that the two of you are going to spend the afternoon together. And, you realize, after two straight weeks of studying in his proximity, you don't mind the presumption. That's how you made your closest friend in undergrad, anyway.
In fact, you think you might want to get to know Jason. Maybe ask about his white streak; you've been growing more and more curious about it. And why he's about seven feet tall and two hundred fifty pounds of muscle but has a passion for romance novels.
"I don't think I've studied in there before."
"It's not too bad, but it's a little louder than the library."
So you two head to the Student Center, but he doesn't open his book, and you open your laptop but don't turn it on. He buys you coffee, though you insist that you can pay for it yourself, and a simple query into what book he's reading currently turns into a two-hour conversation.
Jason likes to read every genre, but he likes classics and romance best. He doesn't just have one brother, he has four, and a sister. He's not on the football team like you'd assumed; he just likes to work out. He's finishing up his sophomore year of undergrad studying English Lit—he sees how your smile freezes at those words, and you're asking how old he is, and he's laughing when he tells you he took a couple gap years. He's your age, actually, and that's relieving for reasons you can't quite put to words.
When you check your watch and curse at the time—it's almost time for your cat's dinner—he asks for your number, and you put it into his phone.
You feel good on your walk home. You haven't made a new friend since the first semester of vet school; the course load is too demanding for you to participate in any GCU clubs. Your roommate asks why you're smiling and you wave him off. Of course, your cat doesn't care that you're in a good mood. He only cares about getting fed.
You see Jason a couple more times over the week, and soon you're too embarrassed to admit that you thought he was stalking you. He's almost as bad a texter as you are, responding at such hours you're half-convinced he doesn't sleep, so you're less self-conscious about taking hours to respond.
You've just gotten around to answering his last text when something knocks against your window.
You drop the phone on your face.
The Red Hood is laughing at you when you open the window to let him in. You'd forgotten he was coming, but you don't say so. He tumbles in, moving a little stiffly, but a lot better than he'd been last week. Your cat, the little traitor, runs to greet him and rubs against his ankles, purring like an engine. The Red Hood bends to pet him. "Hey, kitty." The red helmet tips up and those unnerving white lenses fix on you. "Hey, doc. Here to get my stitches out."
"How have you been feeling?" you ask.
"Good," he says, almost defensively.
It makes you suspect that something is wrong, but when you all pile into the bathroom again like it's a clown car and he pulls up his shirt, the wound is healing nicely. No pink or heat that signals infection, no puffy skin. You remove the stitches quickly, and again he hesitates, like he wants to stay longer.
You find yourself thinking about Jason. You're pretty sure you wish he was here.
"Well, thanks."
"Anytime."
He pauses. "Really?"
You shrug. "I mean, not if you need a hospital. Then I'd expect you to head straight to a hospital. But stuff like this—no worse than this, ideally—I guess I can help you with."
"You're pretty cool for a vet," the Red Hood says. "The last one I visited kept freaking out on me for stealing codeine."
"Well, that's a restricted—wait, you were stealing codeine? What for?"
He shrugs.
"What were you using it for," you repeat sternly.
"Okay!" he says loudly. "Well, thanks for patching me up, doc. I'll see you later, yeah?"
"Wait," you call out uselessly, but he vaults out the window. You gasp and rush to the sill, but there's no Red Hood-shaped puddle on the ground. Instead, his rapidly shrinking form disappears in the distance, swinging between the buildings that make up the Gotham skyline.
You don't see the Red Hood for a while after that, but you hear whispers of him wearing a new costume. You get caught up with finals and Jason, who asks you out after the semester ends.
Your vehement 'yes' takes you by surprise. Him, too, judging by his wide eyes and wider smile. You wonder why he asked if he thought you would say no. You wonder why you didn't realize earlier how desperately you wanted him to.
Now that you're out of school, you pick up shifts at the vet clinic. By some unhappy circumstance, they can only schedule you for the evening shifts. Jason works nights, too, and you've never fully squirreled out where he works, but at least you can spend some days together.
It's when you're walking back from your first shift that you see the Red Hood again after almost three weeks of radio silence. He pulls up next to you on the motorcycle. It's so late that there's no one on the road, so he stays on the asphalt and idles along at your walking pace until you break and say, "Long time no see, Hood."
"Did you miss me?" he teases.
You stop walking, because.
Most of his costume changed. Because it's summer, and even the nights are hot and muggy, you assume.
The pants are the same. So are the boots. But his jacket is red and sleeveless and has a hood that goes down to his eyebrows, the armor beneath short-sleeved, which means most of his arms are bare.
And...
Your mouth is dry. You swallow.
You're pretty sure not even Batman is that ripped. He looks like he's chiseled out of marble.
The longer you're speechless, the more amused he gets. You don't know how you know that, but something about his posture seems smug.
"You're taking 'red hood' seriously now, are you?" is all you manage to say. Because what else are you supposed to comment on? His bare forearms? His veins are so beautifully pronounced, they would be a dream to take blood from, but you have a boyfriend of a whole one and a half weeks, and you may be many things, but you're not a cheater.
He laughs, then pulls his hood low when it slips back a bit. His voice is still modulated, although it's not through a red helmet anymore. This is more like a muzzle. You can't tell if the eye covering is part of it, or like the domino masks that Batman and Robin wear, but the lenses are red now instead of white.
He's really leaning into the theme.
"You want a ride?"
"We're two blocks from my apartment."
He shrugs. "I'm heading there anyway."
What the hell. You've already hopped on the back of his bike before. It's easier to do so the second time. You wrap your arms around his torso again, and when his arms settle over your own, they're warm with his body heat, but not hard, even though the muscles look sharp enough to cut glass. He's firm all over, but his skin is soft, apart from the raised, bumpy scars that seem to cover him from head-to-toe. It makes you worry about him, just a little.
He doesn't drive fast this time. He drives slow enough to hold a conversation and tosses over his shoulder, "So what's new with you?"
"Not much," you say into his ear. Is it just you, or does he shiver? "I finished another semester of vet school."
"Top grades, I'm sure. Did you get extra credit for patching me up?"
"I wish." No, your grades are good, but not exceptional. But exceptional is what got you into vet school. As long as you graduate with a DVM, even if you're the lowest in your class, you're a licensed doctor. There's some relief in that. "The dude I thought was stalking me asked me out, actually."
"Really?" he asks, interested and alert. "Was he really stalking you? Do you need me to scare him off for you?"
"No," you say, smiling at the thought of the Red Hood trying to scare off Jason. They're about the same build, now that you think about it, which you're sure the vigilante isn't used to. And Jason's never been anything but gentle and polite, but you saw an undercurrent of something strong, something like titanium, under that gentle spirit the one time he stood up for one of the baristas at the coffee shop that you first spoke to each other. He hadn't needed to do much apart from stand up and glare at the beleaguered corporate guy angry that there wasn't enough sugar in his coffee, and the dude shut up and scurried out as fast as he could.
It was probably the hottest thing you've ever seen him do, except for that one time you pushed your laptop a little too close to the edge of your desk while studying, it tipped over, and he caught it one-handed without looking up from his book. What can you say? Saving you a couple hundred dollars in getting that fixed was hot.
"It was a misunderstanding," you say. "We just ended up in the same places at the same times."
A gust of wind pushes back the Red Hood's hood, exposing a head of thick, dark hair, the same shade of black as Jason's. The motorcycle swerves in his haste to pull his hood back up, and when you reach your apartment and hop off the bike, he's pushing his hair back, back, beneath the hood.
What's the point of ditching the helmet if he's just going to be fussing with the hood all the time?
"What's new with you?" you ask, scuffing your toe against the sidewalk. Your shoes are falling apart; the sole is peeling away.
"Same old, same old," he says. His voice sounds rougher, but that might just be the new modulator.
"How's your side?"
"How's yours?" he counters. "You still haven't let me see it. I bet it scarred because you were too stubborn to take my advice and patch it up."
You will never admit that he's right. You challenge, "Let's compare scars, then," knowing full well his armor dips below his pants. It's a little silly to picture the Red Hood wearing an armored one-piece, but that's all you can imagine.
He clucks his tongue and shakes his head. It dislodges the hood. A patch of hair falls down to his forehead, and it's white.
But the back of his hair is black.
White and black—
Your stomach flips.
"I thought you had a boyfriend, honey. Why're you asking me to strip?"
So that's what all the teasing's been about. He hasn't been flirting—or he has, his own weird version of flirting, because he's a dumbass.
For a moment all you can hear is the rush of blood in your ears, then you flex your fingers to regain feeling in them. You roll your eyes and say, "I think we've established that my apartment is basically a strip club. Why don't you come up and show me, Jason?"
"Well, I'm flattered, but—what?" He splutters like he's choking on his own tongue. Serves him right. "I'm not—why do you think that—I mean, I could be anyone—"
Yeah, he can have his little crisis on the street. You tug on your own fringe, then swipe into the building.
You hear his muffled cursing as the door closes.
You look forward to him catching up.
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