#gay solavellan isn't real it can't hurt me

[ringneckedpheasant]

solas pov your boyfriend has started going grey because of the well of sorrows but he's still really hot

[ringneckedpheasant]

two gay elves where will they go for brunch

[ringneckedpheasant]

solas pov your goth boyfriend asked if he could do your makeup

[ringneckedpheasant]

1V with Kiernan and Solas? :3

:3c

[ringneckedpheasant]

i’m not actually sure how much time passes between solas dumping you and the final battle but all i’ve been able to think abt at work today is the weird, sudden distance between him and kiernan after that happens.

maybe solas insists that they can still be friends, and kiernan numbly agrees, but then solas will go a week or two at a time without kiernan showing his face in the rotunda; he’s stopped seeking solas out, and has found new haunts instead of the places solas always relied on being able to find him before. solas goes from being brought along almost every time kiernan leaves skyhold to only being brought out of necessity—he’s been replaced by dorian more often than not, and he knows it’s the consequences of his own choice but it still stings, the way kiernan will meet his eyes from halfway across the courtyard as he readies his horse and then avert his gaze. the way that a month will pass when he’s gone and he no longer comes to the rotunda first thing, like he used to on the rare occasions that he would leave solas behind.

and kiernan, of course, has lapsed into his own self imposed isolation—he trusted solas with his heart, and this is what he got for it. better to trust no one at all than to have it happen again.

[ringneckedpheasant]

kiernan doesn't necessarily have a stutter but he does stammer a lot or put awkward pauses between words and i struggle with writing that bc like..... who wants to read a paragraph of dialogue that has 10 em dashes in it..... bc that's how he talks shdkasjdhskhd

having said that though. it's technically wednesday, y'all can have a little snippet of my entirely unbeta'd and unproofread modern au. in which kiernan talks about bugs and doesn't realize he's being hit on.

“Those—those are rose chafer beetles,” he said, and Solas couldn't help smiling a little at the almost instantaneous relaxation of his posture. “They’re in the scarab family, actually, and they—” He bit his lip. “I don’t want to bore you.”

“Please, tell me about them,” Solas said. “You’ve piqued my interest.”

“Well, lots of insects are iridescent, right? But some scarabs and—and these particular chafer beetles, they’re unique. They get their color—not just their shimmer, their color—because they reflect light in a way that almost nothing else in nature does. It’s—I don’t understand all of the physics behind it, but it’s called ‘circularly polarized light’, and outside of the scarab family the only things that reflect light in that way are fireflies, though—mantis shrimp can detect it. They—scarabs, I mean—tend to be left circularly polarized. If you look at them through a lens polarized in the opposite direction, they don’t just lose the iridescence. They cease to be green entirely—without that, they’re black, or brown.”

He looked a little flushed, perhaps due to embarrassment or perhaps due to the fact that he had barely paused for air. He was also smiling though, and Solas saw the hint of dimples in his freckled cheeks.

“Fascinating,” Solas said softly. He felt as unable to take his eyes off him as he had felt unable to keep from smiling.

“Yes, I—I’m very fond of them.”

[ringneckedpheasant]

modern au kiernan and solas never break up bc solas doesn’t suck but. ah shit. fuck. i was going to say “but i don’t think they ever get married either” and then i thought abt solas calling kiernan his husband—

anyway. the other reason they never break up is that modern au kiernan still has a lot of problems but he’s vastly more stable and well adjusted due to. you know. the existence of Therapy and Anti-Depressants.

[ringneckedpheasant]

kiernan and solas’ first kiss actually happened by accident and they fell into each other at just the right angle. like in naruto.

[ringneckedpheasant]

told myself i wouldn’t think about gay elves this early in the morning and then i made a sound like a dog about to throw up because i thought about solas and kiernan dancing at the winter palace before they actually get together. you know. as friends do.

[ringneckedpheasant]

i’m still rlly conflicted as to how i want to go about getting kiernan and solas together bc kiernan is very much someone who is like “i’m going to keep all my emotions right here and then i’ll die” and i don’t know how to get him to a point where he would say anything to solas about how he feels—he came rlly close in my whump fic and then i realized

and i Know i don’t have to follow his in-game romance but the fact that you have to initiate things with solas and he’s hesitant even then just reinforces for me the idea that solas wouldn’t be likely to be the first one to say something—whether due to his own reasons for hesitance or bc he doesn’t want to pressure kiernan in any way.

[ringneckedpheasant]

wip wednesday

tagged by @merrybandofmurderers, ty 💕 here’s part of the fic i’ve been agonizing over for the last 2 months. tw for discussions of tranquility-as-suicidal-ideation and parental abuse

“My mind remembers just as much,” Kiernan confessed. “My mother told me of being made tranquil at a young age. She spat it at me as a threat, but losing the burden of emotion has always sounded more appealing than feeling the same terror over and over again every time I remember some—some pithy cruelty done to me.”

He took a small, shuddering breath. “I do not know if most people muddle over their memories as I do. Sometimes it seems as though I spend more time in the past than the present. Other times they seem to bleed into each other. Rarer still, I experience the full force of the moment I am in, and am overwhelmed by that in turn. I have not yet decided which is most uncomfortable.”

It wasn’t lost on Kiernan how that might sound to Solas, who spent so much of his time observing places and people long dead through the fade, and he wondered, briefly, what ghosts of his childhood might still linger in that room in Kirkwall.

“I wish you could see what a terrible waste tranquility would be,” Solas said.

The comment threw Kiernan briefly off-kilter. “Would I really be so different? I have been told before that I am already as expressive as one. That I do not understand emotions—”

Solas cut him off before he could finish his thought, and the edge in his voice made Kiernan pause the constant tugging of his earring. “Whoever said that has even less of an understanding than you, that they could not see how much weight you bear and how graciously you bear it.”

“Gracious is hardly a word people use to describe me, Solas,” Kiernan said, unable to keep the bitterness from his voice. Ever too blunt, too angry, even when he didn’t mean to be.

He was ready to protest more before he finally looked over at the other man. He often had as difficult a time reading other people’s expressions as he did expressing himself, but the furrow of Solas’ brow and the hard set of his mouth almost made Kiernan believe that Solas was genuinely angry on his behalf.

He meant to turn away, and then Solas lifted his hand slightly, as though testing to see if Kiernan would flinch from his touch again before cupping his cheek. He didn’t tip Kiernan’s head up at all; he knew the way that eye contact often made Kiernan’s skin itch, and never demanded it. Kiernan could feel the weight of his gaze regardless.

tagging @blarrghe @lesetoilesfous @stormthedarkcity 💕

[ringneckedpheasant]

kiernan isn’t a top by any means but gd he would do it if solas asked

[ringneckedpheasant]

snippet. sunday bc i forgot to do this yesterday,

thank you @merrybandofmurderers as always for tagging me 💕 this is my first attempt at writing solas pov and it also hasn’t been proofread by anyone else so go easy on me gksjcjdj

Varric was leaning back against a log by the fire, scribbling notes, and he looked up at Solas with a quirked eyebrow. It grated at him after what had just happened. It was Kiernan’s business and no one else’s, and even that slight expression of interest annoyed him.

“You know, these tents aren’t exactly soundproof,” Varric said after a minute, apparently incapable of keeping to himself.

“I am aware,” Solas replied, refusing to give Varric the details he so clearly wanted.

“Everything okay with you two?”

“Fine,” Solas said, though this was contradicted somewhat by Kiernan suddenly throwing open the flap of their tent. He had a thunderous look on his face, and his tunic hadn’t been buttoned up all the way, as though he’d dressed again in a rush. He did not so much look at the two of them as he went down to the river. Solas could feel Varric’s gaze on him, and his jaw clenched.“Do not ask, and especially do not ask him.”

“I value my life too much for that,” Varric said, huffing a laugh as he returned to his notes.

i realize now that out of context this seems like it might be a sex thing but it’s not i swear—

anyway! if you see this and want to share a wip you can just say that i tagged you :-)

[ringneckedpheasant]

can't put age of kings by the mountain goats on my gay solavellan playlist due to having listened to it too many fucking times but "felt like g-d's anointed when you didn't push me away" is just. so much.

thinking abt the months and months that kiernan spends flinching away from everyone until he finally gets to a point with solas where solas can touch him without kiernan so much as twitching and it's. it's only ever solas. he never warms up to anyone else like that.

[ringneckedpheasant]

obsessed w the tarot card choices i'm making for this kiernan-as-companion thing..... his default card is the nine of wands but also

Tarot card changes:

Regardless of approval changes, Kiernan's card will change to the Six of Swords upon completion of his personal quest (transition, change, rite of passage, releasing baggage).

If in a romance with Solas, Kiernan's card will change to the Two of Cups (unified love, partnership, mutual attraction, working as a team), and the card will reverse upon completion of the main quest line (codependency, break-ups, disharmony, distrust).

[ringneckedpheasant]