#fuck everything fuck it all IM SINGLE SOON
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❄️me finally leaving a toxic/abusive relationship after a year and 7 months.
❄️ This is literally a win for me. JUST LOOK AT THE TAGS LOL. Feminism is gonna shine in a new way for me now, I’m gonna get in a non profit to support against psychological and emotional abuse or sth.
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ALSO @werewolf-mp3
my sideblog hedgie (now novelcracker) with all the translation tips and all it was me lol
SORRY FOR DRAGGING YOU IN I’M JUST SO HAPPY AAAAAAAAH
sorry sorry just ignore it
#the little brat always cancelled last minute in important things ugh#this is literally the best thing that has ever happened to me#his whole family was toxic AF#fuck everything fuck it all IM SINGLE SOON#the picture of Dorian gray and Henry wotton’s fragment about marriage literally saved my ass#IT’S SLUTSTATION BITCH GET IN#NOW I CAN DO ALL I WANT#I DON’T HAVE TO GIVE NO EXPLANATION WOHOO#I DON’T HATE ANYONE IM SO HAPPY I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT THE FUCK ALONE#gosh I’m so fucking happy and free I feel like I’ve won a goddamn lottery#I AM NOT ALONE I’M WITH MYSELF AND THAT’S SO COOL!!!!#that lil brat can waste his whole life if he wants to so badly YOU CAN’T DRAG ME DOWN WITH YOU#I am so individualistic now that my old self feels sooooo colddd ❄️❄️❄️☃️⛄️
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grrr.... my boss came in and asked to talk to me for a moment and basically she was asking how I distinguish between production stock/my stock bc the stock/supply staff had insinuated to her that I'd been stealing their stock which I HAVEN'T!!!! I would never + my boss knows that but she still had to ask.... so annoying
#and i have PROOF i dont steal their shit bc i keep a meticulous spreadsheet of every sample in the food lab (my) stock#and i organise everything by location + have a separate section for stuff in the cold room that belongs to production#bc part of my job is managing emails from sales/marketing asking abt the production stock for test/developmental products#so i have to monitor it. but i dont ever ise those samples i fill out and email the request form to supply if i need one for smth!!!#*use#which supply would fucking know if they were competent at their jobs and fulfilled my requests without me chasing them up 16 times#half the time i have to go to quality control and request THEIR retained samples instead bc i dont get stuff in time#but qc stock is completely isolated from production bc its for assay use only and i always return the samples to them when im done anyway#the only reason theyre accusing me is bc they found a sample in one of my fridges that was logged on their stock system#but I DIDNT PUT IT THERE. THEY DID. i sent the fucking request form and they fulfilled it but didnt log it out of their own stock system#but i have their stupid form attached to a timestamped email i sent them so proof it was a legit request they fulfilled 👍#whatever......#im mainly just annoyed bc for some reason i thought it was almost 4pm and i could go home soon. but its only 2:30 sigh#at least my boss was impressed at my stock spreadsheet lmao she was like wow i didnt realise you were this organised#girl how do u think i respond so fast when u ask if we have xyz sample. of course im not going thru 400+ individual samples in multiple-#locations and boxes/fridges every single time just to find ONE thing. all i have to do is check my spreadsheet.....#i record batch numbers n manufacture/expiry dates of everything too they can go thru it if they doubt smth is mine lmao#i hate being blamed for shit i didnt do especially accusations of dishonesty. im not that shit at my job >:^/#.diaries
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#a lot of cops come in to get their hair cut at work#i dont have a story or anything#i just fucking hate having to cut their hair#and they like come in during their shifts somehow?#at least i hope they are because the alternative is that theyre walzting into our salon in their off hours still playing dress up#but they wear those bulky ass vests that make it hard for them to sit back in the chair so its harder for me to reach#so now the cops are inconveniencing me personally#and i live in a very blue lives matter type area so the rest of my coworkers are all bootlickers#anyway i just try to avoid talking about their jobs#which is difficult cause thats like my number one time killer for conversation#i feel kinda bad because like#im bad at my job in the sense that i dont like talking to people#but talking gets me better tips so#my like number one thing is i ask them what they do for work#and as long as they dont seem to actively hate their job i can start asking them a bunch of questions#and they spend most of the time explaining what they do#and as soon as they leave my chair i forget everything#ive had multiple people explain the intricacies of airplaine engineering#(cause i live close to a major beoing plant)#and i sit there and ask every single one shit like 'oh so did you have to go to school for that?'#'is there a lot of math involved in that?'#shit like that. i dont remember their answers so it doesn't matter#idk why im rambling anyway fuck cops get out me chair lest i shave you bald#edit: just realized i spelled it beoing which is a much better name imo
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Dentist made me feel really bad and felt like I was getting a bad score in going to the dentist and then when he was lecturing me he made me feel really bad and like I didn't ever take care of my teeth and I made the big mistake of eating I had food "all in and over my teeth" and he was just really rude and when I was saying sorry i had eaten like 30 minutes ago he was just still very rude and almost stopped his explanation bc I Didn't Care and Wasn't Getting the point that you Don't Do That before the dentist and I should've brushed so. Feeling great like I know he said he cares about me as a patient but I wasn't feeling it then
#i go back in wicked soon all things considered l-o-l!#that root canal possibly a third (?) and the a reevaluation for my root canal thats still bothering me to where I'm eating on one side of#my mouth#feel like crying (cant) like I did brush and I DO care abt my teeth. I care a lot I brush twice I floss twice I use mouthwash i dont eat 30#minutes after brushing my teeth. I do everything I can. But. Right. Okay. I don't care about them#elias howls#he also (and i do jot think it was meant to) made me feel bad for taking my little plushie out. im sorry for having unresolved dental trauma#im sorry I've had dentists ignore my comfort and made me fucking sob every single appointment and i had that weird one who followed me and#told me not to run away and i need some item for comfort. sorry for being 20 and a child sorrysorrysorrysorry
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God I could and should write a whole fucking book by the end of this life here on Lev and his symbols
ill write it then burn it before anyone else gets a copy. or i wont. im supposed to be helping him this incarnation here to get a better anchor in this plane so maybe it would help more than itd be weird - im just getting from him the energy of "yeah no people already effectively have these things, people on my plane already know me inside and out to an extensive degree, may as well have it here too" you know. fair
#ramblings //#ugh god i love his tone saying that tho. i kept trying to prod to see if it was a ''ugh yeah people know me inside and out and Yes Its#Invasive But -'' but no#oh my god man. his like energy towards his people is..... BEFORE I SAY THIS#I HOPE YOU ALL KNOW IM ANTI PROPAGANDA. the biggest reason i dont work with Lu and others is bc theres this tendency to#be like ''we're darkness but also light! we're teachers we're enlightened we're pure in our own way and the kings are here to#teach you how to empower yourselves and they love all worshipers and they reject all tyrannical authority and they are the good guys#against the chrxstian god who (insert specific atrocity that actually was committed by the kings not the 'chrxstian god' - and#''demons'' should KNOW that because it was AN IMPORTANT PART OF THE WAR so either theyre LYING orrrrr) and we're actually#really down to earth and more holy than anyone else bc we're enlightened - i mean uh uh no wait that contradicts us being#against the love and light style of enlightenment chasing'' like. i will tell you that my boss has massacred a lot of people i will tell yo#im anti monarchy and i dont believe that the kings' peoples are any better than 'angels' and i will tell you a lot of innocents on both#sides have been lost bc of royalty and rich families the kings are directly tied to#so i hope you know that when i say the way lev treats his people in his mind is..... holy shit#i pick apart everything he does. ive seen sides of him that are dark af (and i love him for them lmfao) but as soon as his people are#involved... have you ever been w someone getting hot and bothered and a kid walks in that you thought was sleeping and you just switch#completely into parent mode like. he'll have complex fictions w me helping me write stories about corrupt monarchies and shit#and then no. he is like. hes very good at mindset switching and going immediately into different faces but i swear#his ''i am a king and a king is a head of a mass of people - a king is a servant to his people'' mode is like. impenetrable#he is so. fucking intensely single-minded and trained to be a king unlike anyone else. anyway what was i talking about#OH YEAH. his tone w what i wrote in the post. was so switched into that mode of ''my viscera is theirs to eat as Im splayed on their table#and this is divine ruling. this is my purpose with them'' type shit. PURE thought. there is no other energy i can find in it other than#pure ''this is my job and i do it''. pure as in distilled. a pure tone like a sine wave played on a synth as opposed to a string plucked#leviathan //#ive. im nervous about saying the shit ive said here lmfao but ive had his OK before to say it ALSO. AS I SAID. theres no way his people#dont know the massacre was done by the kings lmfao. like. yall were involved. and also you all have to know that one of the#people that pretends to be the christian god is. two of the kings actually and since lev commonly appears to people and lets them#decide who he is bc hes never arsed making a show of Being Leviathan and whatnot im sure hes been called God plenty of times#too but like. cmon. I dont know who started the ''oh the uh the invading heaven and killing off half the population was the#chrxstian god'' rumour but i was first exposed to it through lu and (his wife) worshipers so yall get the blame - that said...
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i sensed there was new oz art coming in my SOUL AND MOCHIJUN DELIVERED BC IM HER FAVORITE AND SHE WOULD NEVER LET ME DOUBT OR FORGET THAT FOR A SECOND LOOK AT MY BABNANA SCRUMPTIOUS WUMPTIOUS SCRUNGLE WUNGLE I LOVE MY SOOONNNNN
#mine#im revived im rejuvinated everything will be okay no doubt in my mind now#i genuinely mean i SENSED it i was literally telling everyone yesterday & earlier today in the headspace that new oz art would drop#& they obviously believed me bc. thats my son ik when he will be coming home i can feel it in my soul#AND LO AND BEHOLD THERE HE WAS IN MY TWITTER NOTIFICATIONS THATS MY FUCKING SON!!!!!#she did this just for me bc this week has been absolute dogshit and she knew that drawing him would make everything okay automatically#and ensure me that shit will work out very soon. she is so real for that.#what a mentally ill ally truly.#pandora hearts#oz vessalius#the angle has me losing my mind ngl like he looks. HE LOOKS!!! HE IS LOOKING AND I AM CRYING WHILE I HOLD HIM#he is so handsome in his wittle modern day outfit i love that she draws him in it every time now pretty much#god i adore him with my whole entire being every single piece of it including the entire system we all cry whenever new art of him drops#thats my son he saved my life and i adore him like the whole universe and he is still saving me even now what a little SUNSHINE#STOPPING BY JUST TO LET ME KNOW HES OK AND IM GONNA BE OK OH MY BABY BOY OH HOW I ADORE YOOUUU
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Me not being fazed by a bad mark, not realizing that its a bad thing:
Aben: *looks at my mark, pats back in sympathy*
Me: ???
Also me: fuck, am i that useless?
#bro i wasnt even fazed i didnt realise it was a bad thing but then the sympathy. the look of 'dont be upset'.#the look of 'semangat yaa' made me feel like i was an utter failure#'oh u got a bad mark on smth we all did good im so sorry for u!' look.#im so tired. im so fucking tired of crying and being depressed every week. every day almost.#im so tired of being. this version of me that i created for uni#i dont feel like myself anymore. all ive been doing for rhe past few months is literally cry myself to sleep every single night#ive been sleeping more often yet i just get more and more tired fuck i dont have the motivation to live anymore#fuck i hope i die soon. i really do. i hope that something crashes into me and end everything for me#i know alot of things are wrong w me but fuck it makes so scared of being outcasted bc it genuinely feels like smths FUCKING WRONG WITH ME#why isnt everyone else suffering the same way i am? how is everyone enjoying this life but not.. me? what am i doing wrong?#why did i come here? i dont even know anymore. i want to disappear so bad#what am i doing wrong? how are ppl so good at this yet im... here. like an idiot#what was it all for? 10 years of studying art. all to be proven rhat ive sucked at it all alone#along.
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trying my hardest to cut back on vent posts but holy fuck the Horrors
#they simply never stop!! fucking hell!!!#i was talking abt how stressed i am to my mother and she was like “ok point to one thing other than (relative)'s death that's happened”#like!!! it's not about literal things!!! it's about the fact that i just keep losing at every turn no matter how goddamn small!!!!#no i don't remember every time that i was excluded from social stuff or my order was messed up at a fast food place so i didn't get to eat#but i remember how i just can't stop fucking losing!!!!!#like. on top of all the major life events and shit. the small stuff is what's really getting to me#my friends are disappearing. the distance grows greater. soon i'll be completely alone#god it's just fucking suffocating#i have. two (2) friends who actively still reach out to me. and eventually they'll get tored of how much i complain and leave me behind too#they're better for it anyways. nobody should have to deal with being friends with me#i'm just tired. i'm so fucking tired. of everything. i'm tired of being “so brave” this shit sucks ass and i can't fucking take it!!!#and those two friends are counting online friends. if i wasn't counting them i'd have nobody#all my friends have fucking moved. literally nothing i could do about it#just another example of the universe shitting on me at every single fucking turn#ok whatever. im going to bed and trying not to think about it. maybe the universe will take pity on me and kill me while i sleep#marin complains
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You know the drill ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Big tw scroll away Im just going on my silly little rants again
#anyting i oost after this post just doom scrpll away from it#its getting bad again#like bothering every single minute im breathing type of bad#suddenly?????#lmao#but yk the drill#time to pull out the blade unfortunately#thats the only way#disractions only work temporarily#im not planning to quit soon either#its the only way.#sometimes i wish i could die and start all over#i feel like that wouldve solved the problems i have in me#i look normal#but everything about me aside from physical is not normal at all#yall know what im implying#i cant even speak to anyone properly without this fucking head of mine bothering me#i cant insult other people while my own brain just murders me???? i xant even roast and this brain is grilling me to crisp???? HELLO??LMAOWV
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#the whole vet situation gives me such trauma whiplash im too busy with that that i havent really given myself a chance to process today#all i can think about is how painful eating must be for mischa#i noticed she slowed down a bit and wouldnt eat kibble or hard snacks but i thought it might be one single tooth ache idk#i actually thought she was doing better because she slowed down because she has been gulping down food way too fast since the shelter#the last time she had tooth problems like 2-3 years ago i asked a friend to come with me to the vet and she said omg yes of course#and then she resumed texting me normal stuff throughout the day of the appointment and only after i didnt reply the whole day she noticed#like 10 hours too late she was like OH SHIT HAHA!! and this is literally what happens every time when i ask someone to be there for me#when i make myself really vulnerable and ask for help and say that i cant do something alone they let me down#while knowing that i have no one else#i asked my mom to come to the vet once and she literally only talked about herself the whole time distracting me#and then she was like haha yeah lets just drop off the cat at home and go get some lunch hihi!!!!#she never remembers vet appointments even when we just talked about them and loves making fun of me for being stressed and tense#like OH NO WONDER YOU WERE MOODY like im on my period or something#i texted a friend about mischas health issues and me losing my job and she hasnt replied since january and doesnt really talk to me anymore#so i guess that friendship is done too#ill have to go there on thursday alone and overdraft my account and wait until the evening and care for mischa all alone#i cant even talk with someone about this because no one understands or judges my emotions and no one cares anyway#and then ill have to go back to work where everyone knows that i will be gone soon and will pester me about it#they all think of me as a temporary intern anyway and ask WHEN WILL YOU GO FIND A REAL JOB while they make me do theirs#everything and everyone at that job is so horrible and so many people leave and they never learn#a colleague i helped teaching everything suddenly turned on me &my other colleague & made our lives miserable while badmouthing us viciously#and everyone in the office chose her over us and let her get away with it while she screamed at us and behaved like a child#its so ironic how i stayed because i needed money to live and now when i go i will have 0 because of the surgery#i mean its worth it but like#what the fuck is life and what will it fucking be next month
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#im gonna rant about religion and shit again so this is ur fair warning#the christian belief in heaven i think really fucks things up#because theyre the ones in charge of everything and they dont give half a shit about this place#all those old fucks in the senate and shit#why should they care? theyll be dead and in heaven soon#now you could say well golly wouldn't they want to make the world a better place for those that come after them?#youd think!#but no because also they dont give a shit about anyone that isnt also a christian or susceptible to becoming christiian#they view this one single little life we have as a temporary trial before eternal bliss#(one theyre coincidentally failing but theyre ~saved~ so theyre going to heaven no matter what who give a shit)#im just saying when your eyes are so fixed on what comes next you seem to ignore the fact that whats happening around you sucks#maybe this is all me projecting but i feel fairly confident that my experiences were fairly common#i didnt realize how frivolous i was with my life until i realized i didnt necessarily believe in an afterlife#and i imagine thats how most christians feel
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vent in tags againnn
#oh my goddd the loneliness aches it aches it aches#im running out of thigns to distract me from it#nothing interests me i can barely sit through a youtube video i struggle to start new shows or watch new movies#my body hurts all the fucking time#all i can think about is how i might die soon#i always feel weak and its hard to think and its hard to do anything to help myself#and i have no one to help me up#because im too tired to be interesting to be worthy of someones attention#pacing in this dead end is just wasting my own time#i dont know mann i miss my mom but any circumstance where i try to run home for comfort involves having to interact with my dad#it keeps getting harder every single day and the worst part is realizing how small of a blip i am in everyone elses life ultimately#'everyone else' what like. five people#who Know Of me in this world#i wouldnt be distressed if i knew how to keep myself entertained anymore but that passions gone#its incredibly hard for me to draw or even work on my ocs at times because of how constantly distracted i am#so everything thats supposed to be easy is impossible and im just. rotting#im going in circles with my venting here ugh. i dont know what to do and i dont know how im going to keep going#i cant even really just relax to a movie in bed because im fucking stupid as fuck and bought wired headphones instead of wireless a few#months ago and the wire doesnt reach to my bed. thats such a stupidly small thing but its just whta my life has devolved into
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DCXDP Prompt 13 :
@demonic0angel I'm gonna borrow a bit of your 'First Burn' Prompt If ya don't mind <33 just a teeny bit(cuz song hehe) and make it more ANGSTY!!
Danny and Bruce are divorced, Only Dick knew they were together, Danny and Bruce's love started in college, oh how their love and passion were true and gentle, everyone around them wished them happy memories.
But as Bruce took the Mantle of Batman, He never told Danny, neither did Alfred have the heart to tell Danny that he was always getting into dangerous situations as he roamed around Gotham as a Vigilante, Sneaking out at night from their bed.
Bruce and Danny both adopted Dick, Little Richard 'Dick' Grayson, Danny's little boy, his precious little star. Bruce saw how much Danny cared for Dick, Bruce thought Dick could be a distraction for Danny so Danny doesn't notice his secret Vigilante nightlife.
....
Danny knew. He knew everything alright. Danny tries to not cry every night as he feels Bruce sneak away in the middle of the night, every whispers of love that Bruce utters to Danny felt like lies, Danny knew he had secrets too, His Past Vigilante life as a teenager is something he never told Bruce.
But this is something Danny is slowly breaking himself into denial, His husband is a vigilante, that's fine, he was fine with that, but the way he interacted with other women made Danny's heart break, even other heroes... Too close, Too Intimate, Too Comfortable.
Danny stopped following Bruce everytime he left by that time, he felt so hurt and so insecure of himself everytime he saw 'Batman' Interact with those others so.. closely.
It made Danny's core scream in doubt and his emotions derailing into confronting Bruce.
He thought Confronting Bruce about his nightly sneaking would get Bruce to finally trust Danny with the information about Him being Batman but no, it made Danny doubt so much more, Days of constant fight and reuniting, His Little Boy, Dick , and Alfred was the last thing keeping Danny in mental order, Organized and Composed as he always should be. Even if Bruce is Acting like a Playboy Brucie Wayne.
He tried to do what Jazz would have done but nothing FUCKING worked and Danny was always on edge, he felt that everything his husband said was a lie, he loved Bruce but why won't Bruce trust him? Please... please, just tell him the truth, I won't be mad. Please. Just tell me. Tell me everything. TELL ME! PLEASE! IM BEGGING YOU! JUST TELL M—
Danny loves Bruce, But as day passes, that love slowly felt one sided.
....
Dick didn't mean it, it was supposed to be a harmless little prank, he didn't know how rocky Bruce and Danny's Marriage was, he didn't know. He really didn't.
He didn't know a picture of Batman with Selina would seal it off. He didn't know a single lipstick would finish it all. He was only a child. It was his fault. He felt that it was his fault— why wouldn't he? He didn't know.. he really didn't.
Danny and Bruce screamed, it was nothing that Dick could have ever heard before, he didn't know at all. He really didn't.... It was only supposed to be a prank.. He didn't mean it...
...
Bruce soon took in Jason, Dick noticed how much Jason looked like Danny, Dick wanted to yell, he wanted to scream at Bruce, He wanted to confront him about passing the mantle to Jason— but... It's no use fighting against someone that's like Bruce. Not like Batman.
Dick secretly kept contact with Danny and his Family, Dani And Jazz was still his aunt as they lived in Bludhaven, he could always go to them as Nightwing and they'd know to help him without questioning. Dick felt bad everytime he did. He felt as though he was burdening the family of the person who's marriage he ruined, his own Father.
The only Father who could actually handle and was a real father.
Everything passed by so quickly.
Jason Died.
Tim Was adopted and he became Robin.
Jason came back to life.
Dick immediately took Jason to Danny.
Damian Came into their lives. Dick felt his blood Boil when Damian did but he couldn't blame Damian, Dick accepted Damian with a whole heart, acting like the Danny which the Manor Lost because of Bruce.
He will be the person who loved everyone, just like Danny, even if sometimes it's tiring— he just needs to keep being the Father of these children that Bruce struggles to be, It's the only Way Dick could honor Danny.
...
Bruce misses Danny Dearly, he regrets many things.
But the one he regrets the most is...
Losing Danny.
Danny and Bruce are Divorced Because Bruce Fucked up with being Batman and didn't tell the truth, Dick wanted to do a little prank cuz a kid will do pranks and snuck a lipstick on Bruce's coat and a picture of Selina with a kiss mark on it. Danny and Bruce's marriage are rocky as fuck, Dick secretly takes the other Wayne kids to Danny and they come to love Danny as their father much like Dick is attached to Danny, Jazz and Dani are the Wayne's Therapists. Specifically Jazz, she's the Best, Uncle Dan is Jason's Favorite mechanic.
Bruce Misses Danny dearly and wants him back and will try and probably try to court Danny again, nonstop as Batman, Danny still loves Bruce and hadn't moved on, His core is very much attached and embedded in the memory and love of Bruce Wayne, thus he is just waiting for Bruce to finally step up.
Yes this was Angsty, I apologize <33 but yes.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#dc x dp#danny phantom fandom#dp x dc#dcxdp#dcu#dp x dc crossover#dc x dp crossover#dpxdc#possible spirit halloween ship#that's reunited aka getting back togethe#spirit halloween ship#spirit halloween#dcxdpdabbles#dpxdc prompt#dpxdc prompts#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc au#dp x dc prompt#dcxdp prompt#dc x dp prompt
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✧ YOU BELONG WITH ME ENHYPEN—
╰—— 𝗈𝗋 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖼𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗋𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖺𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇
( ✶🪽 𝓢. ) 𝖾𝗇𝗁𝗒𝗉𝖾𝗇 x 𝖿! 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 g. 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖼𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗈𝗇𝗌, 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿 1796 𝒘𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗌 !𝗃𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗈𝗎𝗌𝗒, 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀, 𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉, 𝖼𝗎𝗋𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 ✦ ◞ 𝒞ATALOGUE?!
๑´ ³`) ノ pls leave feedbacks if u liked it ♡ REBLOG !!
LEE HEESEUNG tightens the grip around your waist and pulls you in until you bump by his side. you could easily figure out the fake smile plastered on his face, holding you tight by his side in front of his friends.
“so, is he more handsome than me?”, he whispers as soon as his friends are gone. it took you a couple of minutes to realise why he had a death grip on you, “you seem to like him a lot.” a single conversation with him has heeseung going tomato red now.
“what do you think?”, you scoff, looking him dead in the eye.
“he's got the old fashioned looks, a proper gentleman with a perfect sense of timing. your kinda guy,” his eyes twitched while defining the guy, oh how bad he wanted to punch him.
“you know, you sound like one of my friends with terrible taste trying to set me up on a blind date”, you laugh, wrapping your hand around his suited biceps. “yep,” heeseung scoffs, “he will go blind soon.”
“what do you think of me—?”
“i love you a lot”, you roll your eyes and chuckle, now walking side by side with heeseung, his grip still present on you, “nobody can replace my bambi boy.”
“your bambi boy huh?”, heeseung realises he can never be angry with his pretty girl when he melts the second he hears his nickname by you, pressing a small kiss on your cheeks and pulling you in.
“you want it to be somebody else?”, you smirk.
“hey!”
PARK JONGSEONG keeps a steady frown on his face, watching you finish up your pastry. he's not the type to sulk over things, if there's any problem the first thing he does is talk it out with you, and maybe have a small ice cream date later. but it's been 4 days now, that stupid frown won't leave his face, accompanied with his cold replies, even on this café date!
“is something bothering you these days?”, the fork softly clings against the plate, you try to hold in a giggle, “babe you know can tell me anything,” his sulky face is kinda cute.
“nope, i'm all good,” jay forces a smile. red flag, he's not calling you ‘love’.
“jay, you haven't even touched your pudding,” you sigh.
jay puts on a good serious thinking face, slowly withdrawing his hands from the table and releasing a deep sigh. this thing looks really serious. oh poor jay, what's wrong?
“well”, jay clears his throat before he goes off, “i really didn't think you were like this y/n i didn't expect this from you, if i did something wrong you could've just said that you know how much i love you i would do everything!”
“jay, what are you—”
“and the fuck kinda name's benjamin anyways? like hell we're not in the 19th century, y/n you could do better.”
oh. so that's what it's about. he thinks you're cheating on him, because you left your shared apartment for some benjamin guy for 3 days straight. you don't blame him though, you owe him an explanation.
“babe,” you sigh, “it's not what you think, remember benjamin? my cousin sister's child? i visit her to babysit him.”
“.....the one who called me uncle?”, jay's expression softens, instead he's shocked now.
“yeah!”, you giggle, putting your hand over his for comfort, shooting him a sorry look. “i hate that kid”, jay scoffs, you sigh.
SIM JAEYUN lets out a groan while he stares at the anime plushie in your arms. you're basically burying your face in it snuggling it, and if that wasn't enough the plushie is a man!
no way jake has to compete with a fictional man now.
“why do you need that ugly plushie when im here…”, jake whines, plopping down right beside you and scooting even closer, “am i not good enough?”
“did you just call toji fushiguro ugly?”, a frown casts upon your face as you whip your head around to shoot a glare at your boyfriend. poor him, he's too confused and jealous for this, he really wants to replace the plushie in your arms. “you're out of your mind jake.”
“i am in fact very willing to be out of my mind and be crazy for you,” jake rolls his eyes, shifting closer to you until there's only a pillow between you and him, which he soon throws away. the fresh smell of laundry and cologne floats from his sweatshirt and hits your nose, it always puts you at ease, and you miss the warm afternoons with him, just snuggling and all over each other, giggling over random past memories. “but i know for sure that plushie will…not do that for you,” jake breaks you from your trance.
“how about you show me that?”, you wink at him. heck, have you been staring at him too long?
“now you're talking”, jake smirks, snatching away the plushie from you as he sets it aside, practically throwing himself on top of you, engulfing you within his strong arms to press a series of kisses on your face, “fuck that ugly plushie.”
PARK SUNGHOON sighs, entering your shared bedroom with a bored face and arms folded. some obvious yet subtle signs he's disappointed by you, but the last disappointing thing you remember you did was eat his tiramisu. what crime have you committed now?
the bored expression quickly turns into a playful one as he clears his throat, tilting his head to one side, “are you resisting the urge to kiss and make up with me right now?”
“no not really”, you answer instantly, typing away on your laptop. but then you realised what he actually just said. with squinted eyes and a smile, you turn your head towards him, “kiss and make up? what exactly happened for us to do that?”
“i think it's about time you stop texting your best friend”, sunghoon sits down beside you giving you the meanest eye roll ever. he scoffs, “i don't get why she hates me and you don't do anything about it. it's like you two backbitch about me.”
“you won't believe it but i actually rant about you all the time to her”, you giggle, sunghoon's cheeks blooms from underneath, “she's sick of my extreme love for you.”
you let out a gasp as sunghoon pulls you in his lap, a coy smirk playing around his lips, “she should be. everyone should know i'm the best boyfriend in the world.”
you hook your arms around his neck and pull him closer, “so was the kiss and make up part just an excuse to kiss me.”
“maybe”, sunghoon chuckles, pulling you in for a chaste kiss, “who knows.”
KIM SUNOO stares straight into your phone screen, while listening to you ramble about your day and how it was. and when it glows to reveal the lock screen, sunoo feels infuriated.
“seriously now y/n, i can't believe this!”, sunoo's sudden shift in position causes your head, which was lying on his shoulders, to hit the bed frame, “like this is too much”, he seethes.
you utter a small ‘ouch’ and rub the hurt spot, a confused “what?” leaving your mouth, “wh-what do you mean?”
“you know what i mean, love”, he rolls his eyes, taking your phone and holding up the lockscreen in front of your face. it's not him. it's a random tv show character that he doesn't even know about. it should be him, it must be him, not a guy he doesn't know. “am i really being robbed of my wallpaper privileges?”, he sighs.
you let out a heavier sigh, putting up one of those smiles sunoo can't help but blush to. “don't you worry, love. maybe i don't want other girls to perceive my man. but if you're begging for it, i'll change it”, you giggle.
sunoo let's a sigh of relief and scoffs, “i'm not begging—”
“on one condition though, my head hurts!”
“aww come here, let me kiss it better”, he smiles, pulling you in again.
YANG JUNGWON literally just spawns right behind you as soon as the guy you're talking to at your friend's birthday party decides to make a move on you.
“go find someone who's not taken dude”, jungwon's eyes are green as he spits his words out, your waist already accompanied by his hand. the poor guy leaves in a hurry, not wanting to mess with the intimidating yang jungwon.
jungwon then turns to you, a shadow over his face, he's obviously upset about this, jealous even. “if you were that bored you could've called me”, jungwon mumbles.
“you were in the restroom, ‘won”, you sigh, placing a hand on his broad chest you pout, “are you…jealous—?”
“of course i'm jealous, i leave my pretty girl alone for one minute and some hipster comes and thinks he can have my girl?”, jungwon pauses for a moment to look into your cresent eyes looking up at him, you're smiling, “no. fucking. way.”
“well, it's good for you that i'm yours and only yours”, you reassure him, planting a soft kiss on his cheek and you have his breathtaking smile back. he grins at you before kissing you back, “now let's go home, i hate this party.”
NISHIMURA RIKI follows you around like a lost puppy after the dance class with his heart in shatters. just an hour ago, your dance teacher assigned partners for the upcoming festival. and it just looks like the universe is definitely not on riki's side cause you two were not paired.
“listen i'm gonna tell mrs. lee to make you my partner and i'm very sure she will listen, trust me! because you can't just—”
“riki, it's okay! it's just a project it'll be over till next week!”, you comfort your boyfriend ‘cause you know mrs. lee is a tough case, she won't crack at all. “besides, we'll be practising in the same hall.”
“exactly! that way that asshole can tease me how he got you”, riki sighs, plopping down on the benches, “i want to dance with you.”
“and i want to dance with you”, you sigh, sitting down beside him, “but you know mrs. lee would never rearrange.”
riki pulls you in a tight hug. he breathes in the vanilla scent of your hoodie before pulling back, gazing into your eyes, “if that dumbass holds you by your waist, i will go insane.”
“i won't let him do that”, you laugh, hitting his chest.
“can't we just drop out of this already? we can be the audience instead”, riki whines.
“i agree, kissing in the audience and booing them would be way better”, you nod your head. niki laughs, “you're the best girlfriend.”
© bywons, 2024. do not copy, translate or upload any of my works without my permission.
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MDNI
Warnings: Accusation of Infedelity, heavily unedited writing (wrote this in a power outage in my notes app xx), fingering, eating pussy, dirty talk, dumbification if you squint REALLY hard.
One message is all it took for you to spiral.
Outrage was an understatement. A month, a single month, into Price’s deployment you had recieved a message from an unknown number. They insisted of Price having an affair with his so-called ‘receptionist.’ Being his wife, you didnt believe it. You and John had been married for years now. He wasnt that kind of man! (You hoped.)
Weeks passed and wheels start turning. Seeds of doubt had started digging into you. The late nights he had stayed at base before his deployment, only sending as much as a quick text of ‘Be home late. Dont wait up.’ Or the necessary secrecy between what happens at his job or deployment were starting to plant ideas in your head you wouldnt have ever had if not for that message. Youre being worn down, and its killing you. Its not like you could ask him; being thousands of kilometres away without any time to do as much as glance at his phone.
So the emotional resentment grew. You find yourself wondering how he could do this to you, crying in your empty home that housed the both of you not long ago. Before you even come to terms with it, Youve packed your bags and lawyered up, letting your resentment fester for far to long without any outside input.
On the third month of Prices deployment, you drive yourself up to base with one intention; leave the divorce papers on his desk to find when he comes back and to leave without confrontation.
Security on base knows you as ‘Price’s missus’ by now, offering a small wave and a smile as you walk by and into your husbands office. You put the papers on his desk, that frustration and hurt bubbling up all over again. He has your wedding photo framed on his desk and it only hurts more. What did you do to deserve this?
You turn to go, heading back towards his door when you hear muffled laughter and the sounds of gear being unzipped and dumped from down the hallway. Theyre back. You pick up the pace, praying you can slip out before he gets close enough to notice. You reach for the door handle, but the door opens before you can even grasp it.
Shit.
And there he is, your eyes drinking in the sight of the awfully more rugged version of your husband; beard outgrown and messy with tired eyes that light up at the sight of you.
That light dies as soon as sees just how mad you look.
“So youre telling me, one message is all it took to lose all fucking faith?” Price practically growls, fingers rubbing at his temples. Hes sat in his chair with you on the other side of his desk, just as furious. “Everything makes sense! The staying late at base, the short messages and lack of updates when your deployed!” You hiss, frustration bubbling over making anything small seem huge.
Price takes a deep breath, a futile attempt to calm his temper. “The shit I deal with doesnt sleep. Theres reasons i stay back that you will never know, love. The law itself, wont let me tell you. Same goes for messages. Im sorry i dont have the time to let you know im okay when im deployed, god knows i wish I did.” He scowls, his gaze so heated and intense that you almost look away despite your own fury.
“And what about this receptionist huh?”
Your tone has changed, soft and shaky. vunerable.
Price’s expression softens, but he doesnt say a word, simply rounding his desk to pluck you out of your own chair and putting you down in his office chair. He sinks to his knees in front of you, hands rested on your thighs. Blue eyes peer up at you, sickeningly sincere. “Love, I dont interact with her unless necessary. This isnt some romance movie bullshit.” Your heart is working overtime, lips parted as guilt bubbles. “You- you understand where my doubt is coming from, though…right? Everything lined up perfectly, and-“
Price simply tuts. “We’ve talked about that pretty little head of yours overthinking too much, havent we?” You freeze, throat drying. You nod. “Answer me, sweetheart.”
“Yes-“ you croak. “We have.”
Price grunts in approval, his hands now running up and down your thighs.
“Have you been feeling neglected, hm? Is that it? My sweet wife needs some attention?” Price rumbles, his large, calloused hands that have been marked by countless battles now playing with the hem of your skirt.
“You’ve got my attention now, luvie. No need to play these stupid games with me.”
Your mind is already growing hazy; your husbands words making you almost want to forget about this whole incident. A finger hooks onto the waistband of your panties, bringing you back to the moment.
“Stupid games? John i was prepared to divorce you-“ he shushes you, dragging your underwear down your thighs, then your calves and over your shoes before slipping them into his pocket. A cheeky smile graces his face. stupid muttonchops.
“Must’ve left you alone for far too long then, if you were willing to take it this far.”
He slings your legs over his impossibly large shoulders, making you squeak as your pulled forward on the chair.
“Wouldve come home and fucked those stupid thoughts straight out of your head if i had known you were having doubts about my loyalty, sweetheart.”
He presses a messy kiss to your clit, making you gasp. He grumbles something incoherent (“Me? Cheat? Silly girl.”), before licking a long stripe up your neglected cunt, causing your hips to buck. The taste of you after going months without has price groaning into your heat. He eats like a man starved, a mix of desire to prove his loyalty and that he finally gets to taste his wife after being away for so long.
Hes fuming, really. Toward you? No.
Towards whatever stupid bastard sent you that message. He’s glad you didnt notice him slip your phone in his pocket, because he knew you’d be against him hunting the fucker down. You just need a distraction to keep that pretty little head thinking too hard. And he’ll give you just that.
“Oh, my poor sweet wife…” He grunts, before sucking on your clit with a renewed fevor. He pulls off with a lewd pop, two thick fingers replacing his previous ministrations. You’re squirming in his office chair, mind hazy and hips bucking.
“Thinkin’ I was out here cheating on ya’… you know better, love.” He tuts.
His fingers curl so nicely into that spongey spot that makes you see stars. “M sorry-“ you’d slur, “I didnt believe it when I first saw the message I promise-“ you gasp as price presses his thumb against your clit, rubbing in small tight circles.
“Lovie, you stormed in here with divorce papers. Dont tell me you didn’t believe it.”
Your head tilts back as you pant, small gasps slipping past your lips.
“There we go.” Price coaxes, his fingers picking up their pace.
“Wouldnt even cross my mind to look at another woman when my gorgeous girl looks like that as I stuff her cunt full of my fingers.” He coos, watching your face intently as your release crashes down; intense enough to make you writhe and moan.
Price pulls his fingers from you, licking them clean before getting up off his knees. Your throat runs dry, bracing for whats to come even as you grapple your bearings. You’re mentally preparing for Price to be dissapointed, upset with you, maybe even mad.
He analyzes your expression, leaning back against his desk. His eyes scrape over your small form sat in his chair.
“Im not upset, love. That pretty little head of yours had months to overthink that message without a voice of reason.”
Price tilts your chin up.
“Lets just not have to do this again, hm? Then i’ll be mad.”
Its sounds like a threat, but it isnt. Price knows he’ll always be there to talk his beloved wife down from the edge.
#price x reader#price smut#john price smut#john price#call of duty#price call of duty#cod mw2#cod#price cod#john price x reader#captain john price#smut#im going insane#cod smut#angst?#captain price#price#captain johnathan price
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man im just like. thinking about egg signs and how they've evolved over the course of the qsmp and how the qsmp has evolved over the course of the qsmp and just feeling so much love and affection for every part of the project. i dont have any grand overarching point with this just. like. here's a history of egg comms bc of the kind of person that i am
so wayyyy back ten months ago now at the start of the short and sweet egg event that was planned to last maybe a month at most, the eggs had their own custom, decorated signs!
[ID: Leo with a pink sign with an egg on the bottom corner that reads "hello" in all caps. Her nametag reads Leonardo. End ID]
They were extremely simple, single word signs. There was hello, hola, story, feed, sleep, and maybe one or two more and each was its own separate sign. The eggs could only communicate the most basic needs in words and everything else was through minecraft body language or just hoping their parents guessed right.
But obviously, there was a lot more that parents wanted to hear from their children. I'm not sure who was actually first, but the earliest departure from this system I know about is BadBoyHalo giving Dapper a simple oak sign so he could name his pet slime. (Screenshot from @/lxrd-ren)
[ID: Dapper wearing a diver's helmet standing next to a tiny slime in a boat with an oak sign reading "Bouncy (slmecicle but better)" End ID]
Parents quickly realized how much more convenient this was and pretty soon every single egg had stacks of signs to communicate with.
The next innovation came from Vegetta, who was the resident mod knower at the time. He knew about colored canvas signs and gave Leo signs in her favorite color purple because he loved her and gave her everything she wanted.
[ID: Leo's bed in her room under some Fooligetta fanart with a purple sign reading "<3" End ID]
Colored signs obviously had a lot of advantages. Being able to tell at a glance which egg placed which sign was a huge step forward in eggs being able to have long, complicated conversations as well as leaving obvious marks of their personality everywhere they went. It took a little while for them to be standard for every egg though. Bobby never stopped using oak signs even after Richas and Pomme both showed up with colored signs.
[ID: Two signs reading from right to left a red Pomme sign reading "we already started working on a guillotine factory" and a dark grey Dapper sign reading "thats the most french u have said so far pomme" End ID]
And this was the system for a while! And it worked pretty well for most people! The biggest struggle most people had was egg signs not being translated, but streamers adjusted to that by reading signs out loud so the translators would pick up on them. This also lead to adorable and fascinating dynamics like Richas swearing in signs he wrote for Bad and then warning Bad not to read them out. There was also the genuinely phenomenal development of Leolingo where Leo writes only in Spanish to Foolish because it's easier for her to write and he takes his time to puzzle his way through it and learn in a way that's super cool to watch someone else do onscreen.
Then Tubbo joined the server. And Tubbo himself had no problems at all with the system, but he is dyslexic and he casually mentioned offhand that it was getting kind of annoying to read signs after a ten hour long stream and the admin team Fucking Cooked.
Within 24 hours, they had TTS working on the signs. Within 48 hours, it was working on books too. I can't remember how long it took to get translation working, but it was definitely under a week.
And this opened up a whole new world of possibilities for the entire QSMP. The admin team has been on top of capitalizing on it for story purposes, but also just allowing the egg admins to speak in their native languages to everyone whenever they want has been so enriching for everyone involved. Leolingo is awesome but Foolish has been learning Spanish insanely fast and his process is a lot slower and more frustrating than most people can do in front of an audience of thousands of people without feeling discouraged. That's also one language. We've had everything from Foolish being able to check his work a bit more faster to Phil insisting on his eggs taking a day to speak to him in their native languages to Ramón writing a book for Fit in Cantonese, a language we haven't even seen on the server in any other context!
And all of it is fully understood and fully communicated! Sometimes the translators mess up but no one expects them to be perfect and people ask for clarification if the translator says something that doesn't sound right. It's not only a massive step forward in communication technology, but it's a great demonstration of how to use it and when you can and can't rely on it.
And finally, the most recent innovation! One of BBH's viewers sent him a dono saying they had trouble reading certain signs because they were too low-contrast. Bad, Richas, and Pomme just. Took it upon themselves to fix the problem right there and then. Based on One (1) bringing up their own personal struggle, those three came up with new signs that innovate tremendously on the originals.
[ID: Two separate images of the before and after. The first is the egg signs in their original colors with the corresponding egg's name written on them to demonstrate the font color and the second is in the new, higher contrast colors with the same text. The new signs also have custom decorations for each egg. The second picture also has two signs from Pomme in all caps that read "Send all the love to Richas he spent a whole night making this he's the best <3" End ID]
There are three main innovations visible in the above pictures
1: Obviously, the colors are higher contrast. The signs with white text have darker colors and the signs with black text have lighter colors.
2: The colors themselves are lower saturation. Richas said this made it easier for him personally to read them so he corrected that way, but that's open to change if it causes difficulties for more people than it helps
3: The decorations are for accessibility reasons! People with various different forms of colorblindness will find different sets of colors easier or harder to distinguish, but any of them can look at the decorations and use them to identify whose sign is whose instead.
But! Those innovations are not why I made this post! It's these ones!
[ID: The backs of the new signs when placed on the ground. Most visible are Chayanne's with vines and a hardcore heart, Sunny's with shining sunglasses, and Pomme's with an apple and the Eiffel Tower. End ID]
Richas added distinguishing marks to the backs of the signs too! This is something that Bad brought up specifically as something he wanted because it was hard for him to tell who was talking when he was using TTS from behind signs and couldn't see the colors at all.
We went from custom egg signs (a hotbar or so of words and nothing else to communicate with) through a long journey of expanding communication and expanding who we're bringing along on the communication and how easily they can join in and we've circled all the way back around to custom egg signs (they can say anything they want in any language they want and anyone will know it's them saying it from any angle)
and i guess i have enough feelings abotu that to write All This about it
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