#from the crown/simon to simon choosing wille to them choosing each other

[hillerskaroyals]

good things come in threes

[zee-has-commitment-issues]

I’m not gonna lie I actually really loved this season AND the fact that they went this way with Wilhelms character. Because I do think doing otherwise would be the easier choice. It is harder as a viewer to realize that a character you love comes from a place of privilege and aren’t just magically free from their upbringing by falling in love with someone from another standing. Do I understand why people don’t like this choice? Sure! But personally I’m really happy with it. Also just another note, this season in particular (or what we have got so far) feels very scandinavian to me. Like the plot and angst and how the writers choose to go about it. Both good and bad.

I really liked this season! I really liked what they did with every character... except Felice. I might be alone in that one, though, and maybe after a few rewatches I'll feel differently.

BUT YES.

Showing Wilhelm still being selfish and privileged was important. It was also important to show Simon really not understanding that his life is changing because of Wilhelm.

While Wilhelm continues to try to control everything and act on his privilege without consequence, Simon is still trying to be an activist and show his "fuck the monarchy" attitude. These things can coexist but not without balance, which neither of them are willing to provide. Because they are literally children.

Wilhelm tries to change Simon by censoring him until he is fit for the crown. Simon tries to change Wilhelm by asking him to take a stand on things that he (Wille) doesn't believe he is allowed to. And neither of them are talking about how they really feel about it because they both start to panic. Because of this, neither of them is willing to change, either.

But they do give in. They do compromise with each other, while not in the best way.

Neither of them can magically change because they have fallen for someone of another standing. It isn't all Wilhelm's fault nor all Simon's fault. Like everything else, it's both of them.

Their joint stubbornness to keep things exactly as they think they should be is what made them have such a rocky relationship. Both of them have a predisposition for how they believe their life and their lover should be and both of them are wrong because they aren't taking in the other's idea.

I really really love this season, actually. I'm excited to see how it ends. I know people are nervous about endgame, but I'm really not.

[ireneaesthetic]

Pointing out some other little moments and details from the episodes that need to be remembered • part 2/2

here's part 1/2

episode 4

in my top 5 best scenes of them.

it’s pure angst and such a powerful moment, there’s the need to be understood by the other. simon starts the argument - he actively searches for a confrontation - and both of them end up speaking their mind, like they never did before but had to sooner or later.

it’s the reason of wille’s defeated expression in front of simon’s astonished one: he admitted that the crown prince role is the obstacle he's not willing to accept and overcome for the first time, not only to wilhelm - confirming his biggest fear - but also himself.

edvin once wrote : "that’s wille realizing he’s transformed into the traditional image of a prince. he is lonely, he’s accepted he has to allow simon to love someone else. the worst part for him is that it’s himself who does the makeup".

i couldn't have phrased it better.

i read a lot about simon’s recurrent behaviour in the locker room, waiting for all the boys to shower before getting in and the "i thought everyone had left" to get out. but he doesn’t make it a problem if wilhelm is the only one left in the room.

or him turning away to not be watched by marcus when he gets dressed, but not if it’s wilhelm the one who’s watching him, cos he feels comfortable and safe enough to do it - and let wille undress him too !!

the “i get it, you’re not in love with me anymore” is what gets simon to lift his head up in zero time, not lower the gaze again but focus entirely on wille’s words.

episode 5

wilhelm waving his pencil in the air to catch simon’s attention. they smile at each other right after, it’s a very simple thing but exactly the one they need the most in this moment: to share a look of understanding and reassurance - ‘it’s okay, we’re on the same page’.

simon’s concerned expression.

it’s the first time he gets to face wille's anxiety for what it truly is, seeing how bad it can mentally and physically affects him.

for unknown reasons i find comfort knowing both wille and simon happen to touch the frog in the same episode.

+ it’s the closest interaction between simon and erik we can ever get.

episode 6

when omar said this is the most heartbreaking moment for simon he’s so right.

it is sara, it’s family we’re talking about and there’s no betrayal hurting more than one coming from a person you're supposed to fully trust, unconditionally. he looks at her not recognizing who he thought he knew so well anymore.

it may be the same 'manifesto' from s1 shown again like a heavy reminder, but there is a very different and grown up wilhelm standing in front of it now.

him being the only one not looking into the camera but rather down. it really sets the tone for what’s coming.

throwback to s1 wille, when he folded the written paper of the speech in erik’s memory to continue on his own terms instead.

this is also it: the head shaking, the “nej”, the sudden choice of stopping to speak for others - not what his truth is -, throwing all away and let his heart speak. it’s such a power move.

he looks back at simon to give him a reassuring smile. it’s the first thing he does when he stops talking and what simon also needed to turn his fear and worry into relief.

simon “i want to be with you and if we have to keep it a secret, then so be it” eriksson and prince “it was me in the video” wilhelm. they love and respect each other this much.

interpreting this as a ‘i hope you’re proud of me’ look to the sky aka erik? why not.

+ bonus

boris is proud of him fr. he needs to be praised and s/o to one of the best quotes ever that was the turning point of it all: “we can’t choose who we’re born as, but we can choose how we want to live”.

[enjoythesilentworld]

Wille's Month - Revolution

or, (Dance Dance) Revolution

day 4! @youngroyals-events

post-s3. the gang celebrates. Wille gets his first glimpse at normal. rating: T (99% fluff, 1% light angst)

read below the cut or on ao3.

So, maybe they can’t just drive to another country straight after graduation. Linda is expecting Simon and Sara home at some point, and technically Wille is still the Crown Prince. Apparently, the fact that Kristina hadn’t sent the cavalry to chase him down didn’t actually mean he was totally off the hook just yet. 

They don’t get very far, anyway. Wille – and apparently Simon, too – had been too upset to eat anything that day, so they stop at a diner for an early dinner. The server barely gives them a second glance as their little crew occupies a booth in the back. Wille slides in and only lets go of Simon’s hand for one second so he can wrap it around the other boy’s shoulder, instead. Sara and Felice are occupied with their own conversation, so the two boys tuck themselves into the corner, touching at every possible point that could still be deemed appropriate in public company, and smile at each other like idiots. 

“Wille.” 

“Simon.”

“I am so proud of you.” 

Wille grins wider, pressing his nose into Simon’s curls and inhaling deeply. He has never felt so carefree, so happy. 

“I love you.”

“I love you,” Simon mumbles back, pressing a kiss into the back of Wille’s hand, “but I am also hungry.” 

Wille laughs and pulls a flimsy paper menu closer to them, leaning over Simon’s shoulder to browse. It all feels so normal, so perfect.

After the lake, he’d done everything to swallow the truth. To somehow come to terms with the fact that he may never see Simon again, never touch him again. He’d been grappling with that, the heartbreak of losing the love of his life again, and didn’t know how he was meant to move on. It was Simon though, the love of his life, who had made him brave enough to face the truth. Brave enough to speak to his mother with calm words, brave enough to step back from something he’d only held onto to please her, to honor Erik. He knew, because of Simon, that choosing himself, choosing his own life, was what mattered in the end. And he had. 

And now he sat here, a first taste of a normal life, in a dirty booth with flimsy menus and underwhelming food and probably a few health code violations. It is perfect. It is everything Wille had been hoping for his whole life and now he got to share it with Simon, too. 

He orders a big, greasy burger. He spills ketchup on his white shirt and does not care. He laughs wildly and kisses Simon’s cheek and does not care. For the first time, he is unconcerned about the stares, by the nagging voice in his mind, by his lack of table manners. It is perfect. 

Felice and Sara both look so happy, too, and have not stopped talking to each other. Simon keeps staring back at Wille with a dumb grin, disbelief in his eyes. Wille can’t believe it either. The relief he sees reflected there, too, means everything. He knows it hadn’t been easy for Simon to end things. He saw, on the gravel road behind the idling car, that Simon loves him just as much, just as deeply. Like a normal couple, they share drinks and feed each other fries and are generally disgustingly in love for all to witness. 

Somehow, they end up at a local arcade. Wille had been too distracted by Simon’s hand in his to notice much of the drive. The building is mostly empty, somehow, but machines ring out across the whole room in a symphony of color and sound. Wille has only ever been to one arcade; which was a crime, he thought, looking around the room. This, too, felt like a normal activity. Something you did with friends after school, a way to avoid your homework and nagging parents. 

“Come on,” Simon says, pulling Wille’s arm toward a big black box with a curtain — a photobooth. They squeeze in next to each other, Simon half on Wille’s lap. In the first picture, they both smile wildly into the camera, baring all their teeth. In the second, Wille plants a big kiss on Simon’s cheek. In the third, things begin to devolve as Simon pulls Wille in for a real kiss, and by the fourth they are too distracted to notice the flash. Eventually, they stumble out, laughing and flushed. 

Nothing but happy to follow, Wille lets Simon pull him around the arcade to a full lineup of games: air hockey, Mortal Kombat, skee-ball. Simon kicks his ass in every one, ever the competitor, and Wille doesn’t mind one bit. 

Simon gasps. “Oh, Wille, we have to.” 

He lets himself be pulled, again, to a very large machine in the back of the room. 

“Dance Dance Revolution?” 

“Yes! Get your ass up here. I want to see your moves, your Royal Highness.”

Wille rolls his eyes, but steps onto the platform, nonetheless. “You can’t call me that anymore.”

From where he’s squatted down to insert a few coins, Simon turns to look up at Wille. His smile looks almost sad, somehow. He stands back to his full height and wraps his arms around Wille’s neck.

“And thank god for that,” he smiles, pressing a quick peck to Wille’s lips. Wille hums and goes to pull Simon closer but is quickly pushed away. “Prince or not, I’m gonna destroy you.”

“I don't know about that. Some may say my dance moves are revolutionary. That’s what won you back at the Valentine Ball, isn’t it?”

“Sure, you keep tellin’ yourself that, baby.”

Wille lets Simon pick the song, something called ‘Right on Time’, and a fast beat begins pounding through the speakers as the machine counts them down. While Wille is taken aback by the sudden barrage of colors and arrows, Simon jumps right in and nails the first few steps perfectly. 

Don't you know Don't you know I'd been waiting for you? Don't you know Baby, you just showed up Right on time

Wille swears and jerks into motion, stumbling to catch up. From beside him, Simon throws his head back and laughs wildly; the most beautiful sound Wille’s ever heard.

But you have made me Feel so good Just by pulling me closer to you I close my eyes in your arms The life is simple again with you

It’s so surreal, being here, dancing to a silly upbeat song when just hours ago he thought he was doomed to love Simon from a distance for the rest of his life. Beautiful Simon, who is here now, too, grinning wildly, curls bouncing, shouting teasing words at Wille for his bad coordination. In retaliation, Wille sticks out a hand and pinches at Simon’s side, trying to throw him off balance. Simon yelps and pushes back at Wille, accusing him of cheating. He just grins wildly and tries to keep up with the beat of the song; half watching the screen, half watching Simon, like he always is. 

Can't you see Can't you see I'd been waiting for you? Can't you see Baby, you touched my heart Right on time

By the end, they’re both gasping for breath. Wille does not win the game, but he still feels on top of the world. He pulls his boyfriend into his arms, both sweaty and still breathing hard. 

“You’re so talented,” he says, smiling into Simon’s curls. 

Simon giggles and nips at Wille’s collarbone. “I can be your dance dance revolution.”

[bluedalahorse]

Do you think canon Sara and August will see each other again in the futur ?

Short answer: It’s not impossible! And it’s certainly great fanfic fodder.

Long answer: The question of “canon” Sara and August is what makes this question require a longer answer. The last we see of canon Sara and August is them broken up, and that’s the last we see of them as a pairing. At the same time, an important think about that scene is that Sara owns the part where she still has feelings. I don’t think that means Sara’s going to keep pining for decades, but I do think it means she’s not just girlbossing her way out of that relationship like she doesn’t care. She’s vulnerable and honest about the part of her that’s still in love. Her choosing her friends and Simon and herself has more meaning if she’s actually giving something up.

More importantly, though… I also don’t feel like I have to take all my orders from canon. And canon leaves these characters behind when they are young and their lives can still go any number of directions.

Now that canon is over, the characters belong to the fanfic writers. We are allowed to do what we want with them! Like, I saw some folks lamenting that Rosh/Stella didn’t become a real thing and Y’ALL IT STILL CAN. You can write a thing where Fredrika and Stella break up and adult journalist Stella is interviewing adult women’s national football team Rosh after they win the world cup, and Lisa will not smite you with a canon lightning bolt. She’ll probably kudo your fic with her secret AO3 account. WE ARE THE FANFIC WRITERS. NO GODS NO MASTERS.

Ahem.

A more interesting question for me is, what would need to happen next in Sara and August’s lives for them to one day have a Second Chance Romance? What are the fanfic ideas in my brain?

I don’t think they’re disappearing from one another’s lives entirely. Wille is still going to be interacting with his family members from time to time even if he isn’t Crown Prince, and that includes August. I myself read Wille and August’s reconciliation scene at the party as a new start for their relationship. Not one that forgets the past, but one that is able to move forward into the future. 

If Wille is going to keep interacting with family in some capacity or another, and Wille is going to stay with Simon and Simon is going to stay reconciled with his sister, then it is possible that Sara and August will occasionally still be crossing paths. Maybe not all the time, and maybe they work to keep their distance. Certainly they’ll date different people along the way and maybe they’ll be in situations where they end up meeting one another’s other partners at times. And they’ll both be growing up, you know? They’ll get to see sides of one another they don’t see as teenagers.

On August’s end, I do think if he wants to have any chance with Sara again, he has to make things right with Simon. But I think he’ll want to keep things right and continue to make them better with Wille (deep down what August really wants most is family, like more than he wants to be king, this is a hill I am prepared to die on) which would mean investing in trying to make things right with Simon. Not even for the sake of August’s relationship with Sara, but for the sake of August’s relationship with Wille. 

I know August wasn’t reconciling with Simon at the end of season 3, but I honestly think that a) making things right with Simon is going to take a lot of time, like years actually, and b) August had to start with Wilhelm and with their shared complicated grief over Erik, and that took a whole season. But believing in a universe where Simon and August can actually learn to get along with each other… idk. It’s kind of a cool idea. They have ambition and a sense of dedication in common, and it would be interesting to see them understand that. And I don’t think it’s completely implausible.

(In one of my imagined scenarios of August trying to be a better family member to Wille and Simon, Rosh’s wife—a wonderful OC character who I’ve named Agnes, who is a chill nerdy lady who owns a gaming store—arranges weekly DND campaigns for the three of them + maybe Ayub, and they all work through their stuff by leveling up their characters every week. Please believe in my DND universe with me, it’s incredible.)

Another thing I think would have to happen is August would have to leave the monarchy eventually. Which I think is totally possible too. I got another ask about that, so I’m going to save my thoughts for that post specifically.

Lastly, he needs stronger connections with other friends. Maybe that’s Nils and/or Vincent (both Nils and Vincent have interesting side plots in the future!fic I’m envisioning for August and Sara and the other mains) or maybe he makes brand new friendships he can lean on. That way Sara isn’t doing all the emotional labor ever for him.

On Sara’s list, I have less of a defined set of things I’d like to see, but I feel like growth and more life experience generally can’t hurt. I think it would be great if she’s dated some other people first, both casually and seriously so that she’s built up relationship experiences. And I think it would also help Sara to have some disabled/neurodivergent community, as that seems to be a thing she currently lacks in canon.

I think both of them need a significant amount of time apart (at least five years, but I’m thinking more like a decade) and also more therapy. All that said… neither Sara nor August need to be perfect for them to have a Get Back Together storyline. Otherwise there would be no story! They can be struggling with new grown up things.

Finally, I think it’s worth thinking about how much potential there is for both of them to change with time. When I think back on my teenage self 20 years ago… damn, teenage blue was selfish and sheltered and hadn’t done fuck all to confront her racial or socioeconomic privilege. She was taking out her internalized ableism on herself and other people all the time. It’s taken me a long time to grow up, and the path hasn’t always been linear.

The YR characters are so complex and dynamic that I think it does them a disservice to imagine futures where some of them are Only Ever Good and others of them are Only Ever Evil. I don’t think we have to envision a future where Sara and August get back together—like it’s not a mandate—but I don’t think there’s any mandate forcing us to imagine them apart forever, either.

And you know, after one has put in all that time on character growth… well. The reunion smut has the potential to be pretty hot. So there’s that, too.

[groenendaelfic]

I've been thinking a lot about trans!Simon lately, specifically transmasc Simon, and the idea both saddens and infuriates me.

Not the part about Simon being trans of course, but how the Royal Court, the government and a not insignificant chunk of Sweden would react to Wille dating a trans man.

Because even if Kristina & co are told in the same briefing they find out he exists (unlikely but possible), they would hear his name first and assume he was AMAB.

Of course Kristina and the Royal Court would prefer if Wille dated a cis woman, but compared to a cis guy? They'd be delighted.

Transmasc Simon has a womb, to the best of their knowledge a fully functioning one, and that's all that matters. That Wille is enough into someone with a healthy womb that he's willing to marry and have children with them.

It's basically a win/win for everyone.

Wille gets to be with the person he loves, Kristina gets a happy son and hopefully grandkids and legitimate heirs in a few years, the government doesn't have to bother with pesky changes to the law and can still pride itself on Sweden being one of the most modern and progressive countries in the world, all without lifting a finger other than to permit the Crown Prince to marry the love of his life.

And if the relationship doesn't work out? Well then everyone can rest assured that Wille can manage to get it up for someone with a womb, so there's still hope. Yay.

Oh, except for Simon. It'd be a nightmare for Simon, because if he does not get pregnant, whatever the reason might be, then he'll be torn to shreds by the media etc and being called selfish will probably be the least of it. He will be pressured from day one of the marriage.

If Wille steps down? That is going to be a major blow to trans rights and acceptance, and terfs and transphobes will love it. I'm not saying that makes being a transmasc spouse to the future king worth it, I'm just saying there's no choice which won't be shit and leave Simon feeling guilty and most likely requiring therapy for life.

But if he does choose to get pregnant? He will be feminized to hell and back. He might enjoy being pregnant, but he also might not, and it as well as the entire circus around it might also cause the worst kind of gender dysphoria.

In fact I think it's very likely. And yet the pictures of him pregnant (and maybe photoshopped to make him appear more feminine because lets not kid ourselves people suck) will keep being posted and published for the rest of his life, whenever a "halfway plausible" reason arises, or maybe just because it's a slow news day.

And you know what happens after you have your first child? The questions of, why bother getting your figure back? Why not go for a second one immediately? Wouldn't that be easier? start coming up all day every day, even by "well intentioned people"'.

It'd be absolute hell for Simon, and that's why I'm never going to write trans!Simon (and/or pregnant!Simon of any kind). Apart from the fact that I would have too much anxiety about not being able to do the topic justice.

(I do know that there're a few trans!Simon fics out there I've yet to read, and that is awesome, because more fic is always good and because I admire those authors so much. This post has nothing to do with any existing trans!Simon fic, but is rather in reply to a few anon asks I got re Basket Baby and choosing to make Wille the one who gets pregnant, despite me generally seeing Wille as someone who prefers to top more often than not, and Simon to bottom, although they do switch plenty enough and want to try everything with each other, because they're Wilmon)

[whenitisreal]

O U R revolution...

There’s a shifting point, long before the speech even. Wilhelm is terrified to his guts to go up there and stand in front of everyone. But then, his eyes find Simon’s and something changes. 

There’s still fear, but that gives him the strenght he needed. ‘It’s not only about me, it’s also about him.’ Jan-Olof somehow deprived Simon of his own voice, forcing the choir to sing the classic Hillerska song instead of his own, the one he wrote about Wilhelm, about their love. Wille is reclaiming power.

When Wille finally goes on stage, fixing up the mic, then his cards. The cards being rather like a script somehow. One that represents the Royals voice, one that is not his own. That inner struggle appears right here. The silence feels so heavy in that moment.

There are 2 paths Wille can choose : His parents, the Royal family; which means following the traditions way, one where he play pretends and keep everything bottled up. Or the second path, Simon; which means following his heart, one where he can finally break free and just BE who he is.

Even though Wille is back to him, it’s as if Simon could feel exactly the battle he was going through. He’s taking a deep breath, as if, that would allow Wille to take one too, to find back some calm in the midst of that storm.You got this.

Wille’s words echo even more, as Simon appears, behind him, as if he was right by his side. Even what is supposed to be home, the castle, his family, apart with his brother who he has now lost, Wille never truly felt like he could be who he is, rather always who THEY expected him to be. Until he arrived at Hillerska, until he met Simon and his whole world widened. 

Simon, from the very beginning, always embraced who he was. As Wille told Boris, Simon awakened something in him. The door he used to keep under lock, he was now opening up, finally letting himself feel. He could be just Wille, not the Prince or the Crown Prince. Because Simon made him feel safe enough. The place Wille didn’t even want to go to in the first place now feeling like a shelter, like a home. 

Home. That’s where again Wille is instinctively reaching towards, not looking in front of him, but rather choosing to turn behind, to Simon. Or almost. Because, no matter the cost, that’s the only path for Wille. One where he’s finally with Simon.

It feels like a scream from the heart. This speech, this script is the path you want for me, but it is not the one that I WANT. Wille finally breaking free and owning his voice.

The focus one second on Boris somehow validates it. “We can’t choose who we are born as, but we can choose how we want to live our lives.” Like this life is his own. And no matter what he’s been taught, Wille is allowed to feel however he feels and lead his life the way he wants to. He is taking control. 

Right after Simon said he wanted to be with him, no matter if they had to keep it a secret or not. All he cared about was for them to finally be together. Yet, in Wille’s mind, it’s just not right. Even more so, after everything Simon had to go through the past months, from the Royal family, from the school, from everyone really. They did nothing wrong but fall in love with each other. It is, HE is probably the most beautiful thing that ever happened in Wille’s life. That’s not something he want to hide anymore, that’s something he can only feel proud of. 

Remember his mother’s words last season: “When you’re young, love feels like the most important thing in the world. [..] What I mean is, is it worth it ?” The answer is clear for Wille : yes! He is certainly aware he just started a revolution among the monarchy, hell, he might even lose the crown after his revelations. But every sacrifice is worth it, in the name of the most precious thing in this world for him : Simon. 

It’s not a maybe, it’s a certainty. He loves this boy with all his heart. 

Wille once again turning, all the way this time to face Simon, so he’ll see it, so he’ll feel it. Moments ago, he was whispering it in a corridor, only for Wille to hear. There, Wille is claiming it to the whole world. “I love you”

The realization on Simon’s face, as he is smiling back.. “oh my god.. he loves me” is absolutely everything. The song that starts playing, so perfectly on point “And you loved me; I could feel it. Cause I loved you. Can’t eclipse it” 

And now, it was confirmed that this scene was supposed to be longer!! So, what happened, right after Wille turned back to the Royals, and the cameras ? I guess Jan-Olof tries to stop everything while the reporters start asking more questions to Wilhelm. 

But, Wille’s sole focus remains Simon. So he finally walks back to him, as the others students from the choir let him go through. Until he finally reach Simon who will probably still be in shock after what just happened. Unable to say a word, but feeling so much, so much love. His emotion rolling down his cheek, as one single tear. 

This time, Wille allowing himself that gesture, to gently caress Simon’s cheek and take away that tear. Eyes locked on one another, as the rest of the world seems to vanish away. The two of them instinctively reaching for each other’s hands, what has always been their source of comfort. 

Not “you and me” anymore, but “WE”. Standing united together, hand in hand, as the rest of the audience and the world cheers for them. Love do always wins. Let’s start OUR revolution now... 

((Simon was supposed to be the one singing his love, through his song, and in the end, it was Wilhelm who sang his love for Simon instead. ))

[helsteeth]

There are so many parallels in YR, and I have been thinking recently about the parallels between W and S’s mothers. Yes, they are nothing alike but more with both W and S complete and utter need to please them and keep then happy (granted for very different reasons).

I’ll particularly focus on Linda here. Right from season one, episode one you see Simon making questionable choices to make his mother happy.

He can see she is sad as Sara has no friends and so decides to buy booze for a party he has absolutely no interest in going to.

This behaviour continues throughout the season. Stepping in and making sure she is protected from Sara’s behaviour and upset.

And, one of my all time favourite season one scenes, when Wille makes a fuss of Simon’s mum and puts her at ease. Her happiness is everything to Simon and you can see him fall a little bit more in love with Wille because he is nice to his mum.

So, to season two this behaviour continues. The happiness of his family over and above his own needs and desires. So, I think episode 5, season two is critical for Simon’s character development. In the scene (and apologies for no gif) where he tells his mum about August posting the video - before that his mum is chatting away about Marcus. How happy she is they are together, how great it is and, crucially, how proud she is of both Simon and Sara.

“I’m so so proud of you guys.”

This is said immediately after her comments about Marcus. For Simon to then not choose Marcus - to choose Wille, to not do what would make his mum happy is absolutely everything. Same for Wille, to not choose what is “best” for the crown - to choose Simon, to not do what would make his mum happy is absolutely everything.

They are different stories, different relationships, different backgrounds but ultimately how W and S find each other and their similarities and ultimately their love.

[daylightaftertherain]

there’s something about wilhelm and simon’s relationship with promises. wilhelm has to assure the entire country that he’ll stop making ”mistakes.” the last time he sees erik in person, erik promises that they’ll see each other soon, but he doesn’t get the chance to keep it. micke has probably made a promise to stay clean or sober at some point and broken it, over and over again. simon tells his mom that he and sara are doing fine at hillerska. august promises simon he’ll pay him back, he tells the queen he’ll take care of wille, and tells wille he’ll be there for him. wilhelm promises his parents and everyone in hillerska that he’ll do his best to be an adequate crown prince. and wille makes so many unsaid promises to simon, to staying friends, acknowledging his feelings, not leaving simon alone, and not dragging him back and forth within their relationship. most of these promises are broken.

and the thing is, there are so many factors as to why they can’t keep their promises. there’s obviously a portion that’s the character’s own fault, but often it’s outside forces that affect them the most. erik gets into a car accident, wille leans to august as an older brother in his grief, simon’s trying to protect everyone in his life, and micke’s addiction essentially controls him. we know this, for the characters, those unkept promises are painfully personal, and their choices often revolve around them.

simon makes a pact with sara to cut off micke, but he’s still his father, so he turns to him. he doesn’t want his mother or sister to be unhappy, so he goes out of his way to make deals with august. then he has to deal with august having no money, sara and linda finding out abut micke at the worst time, micke relapsing, and while all of this is happening, wille’s continually going back on everything they’ve agreed on in their relationship.

wille tries to keep his promise to his mother and to sweden, but hurts his connection with simon along the way. he tries to listen to erik’s advice and trusts august completely, letting himself get drunk and high. he appears to get into national trouble again, even though august was the one who filmed and posted the sex tape. finally, the added pressure to live up to his family pushes him to deny his relationship with simon. he’s so caught up in the wave of expectations and promises to live up to, he chooses the route that’s most familiar - putting his family and the monarchy first.

a more abstract interpretation of promises is the assurance of privacy. that wille and simon would be left alone in their room, that their first time would be just between them. this isn’t just broken, it’s ripped away from their control and tossed into a blinding spotlight. the entire world is in on their promise and slowly ripping it to shreds. even the ”i love you” in episode 6 is essentially another promise - that wille truly cares and is sorry for everything that’s happened between them.

what’s going to be interesting next season is whether either of them can bring themselves to trust in promises again. as far as simon knows, wille could very well deny him a fourth time. and wille’s completely aware of the fact that he has nobody to back him up- simon, erik, august, and kristina are all lost to him. they’re going to have to relearn to believe in the people around them, or figure out who to put their trust in.

[missmeganlee]

Who's Going to Tell Simon?

I've been thinking a lot about who should be the one to tell Simon it was August who filmed and leaked the video. Either way Simon's going to be very hurt that 1. it took them this long to tell him and 2. that he was basically the last person to know.

If Wille is the one to tell him this would be a step in the right direction to rebuilding their relationship and establishing trust between them. However, this could also break whatever was left of that trust because Wille's family, and by extension Wille, is protecting the one person who caused all this pain in the first place. Also imagine the heartbreak Simon will feel when he goes home and says to his mom and Sara "it was August. August was the one who leaked the video." Only to have Sara say something along the lines of "yeah I know." That's what will hurt him the most. That Sara knew and didn't tell him, if Wille is the one who ends up telling Simon. They said "no more secrets" in episode 3, and this is a huge secret Sara has been keeping from him. The hurt that Simon would feel from this betrayal I would equate to the same level of hurt Sara felt when Mickie said Simon had been visiting him. It'd be another wedge in their relationship, driving them further apart from each other.

If Sara is the one to tell him, Simon would still be pissed that he wasn't told right away, but I think he'd be somewhat more understanding. Maybe she needed to work up the courage to tell him because she knew he'd be angry. Kinda like how she didn't tell Felice right away that August kissed her. I also think that if Sara told him instead of Wille, Simon would be disappointed that Wille didn't tell him, but not surprised. At this point Wille has shown Simon that when it comes down to it Wille will choose the crown over Simon. Wille would have to do a lot more to prove to Simon that's no longer the case.

So, personally, I think that Sara should be the one to tell Simon. It's the way that causes less drama and fallout between the characters, but if Lisa wanted to up the angst and give us more drama she'd have Wille tell Simon

[malinthebodyguard]

Heavy is the head:The Crown and Young Royals

PSA: Any mentions of Queen Elizabeth and other members of the BRF in this post refer exclusively to their fictional characters in The Crown and not the actual people. I’m not a real PPO and I don’t know these people.

As a fan of both shows, I’ve always felt that Young Royals borrowed a lot from Queen Elizabeth’s characterization in The Crown for Kristina’s character. After rewatching a few scenes from The Crown, not only am I convinced that this is the case, but that I also wanted to compare how these two shows represent monarchy. 

One of the central themes of The Crown is the idea that ‘heavy is the head that holds the crown. In order to be Queen, Elizabeth has to sacrifice herself. This is explicitly stated by Elizabeth’s grandmother in a letter she sends the new Queen after her father’s death in the first season:

If we were to remove the context of monarchy from this message, it would be read as an incredibly insensitive one. Elizabeth had just lost her dad, whom she absolutely adored. She was now expected to put aside any grief in the name of the monarchy. We see how this is incredibly painful for her. Later in the episode, there’s a heartbreaking scene where Elizabeth cannot bear to see her father’s body. When she finally dares to take a a peek, the sight of his corpse sends her   into sobs. The entire set-up seems absolutely tragic. Yet in the show, Elizabeth Windsor dies so Elizabeth Regina can live. The Crown frames this as a noble  sacrifice. One that she makes for her people, almost akin to the Passion of Jesus.

We see something similar with Kristina after Erik’s death: 

Kristina, the woman, cannot mourn her son. That woman does not exist-- only the Queen exists. Her only concern is that ‘The Crown must win’. In this case, for the Crown to win Wilhelm must adjust to his new role. Like Elizabeth, we know this is incredibly painful for Kristina. We see the pain and anguish she is trying to repress. She’s unable to have more than a single bite of food. 

But Young Royals isn’t framing this as noble, but as sad and uncomfortable. Still, for the rest of the episode, Wilhelm tries to embrace the idea that ‘The Crown must in.  He tries to mourn Wille so he can become Kronprinsen. But  His grief, his anxiety, his longing for Simon prove to be too much for him and by the end of the episode he renounces this sacrifice. 

The Crown also shows us a Crown Prince struggling to sacrifice himself for the monarchy. Charles and Wilhelm’s storylines are also very similar to each other (Wilhelm, sweetie, I am so sorry... It’s absolutely true, but I’m still sorry). 

Charles and Wilhelm are constantly struggling to choose between love and duty. Choosing love means choosing Charles Mountabtten-Windsor, choosing Wilhelm the Man. Their duty is to kill those men and become the Prince of Wales and Kronprinsen respectively, but neither one of them is capable of following through with this sacrifice. Their inability to fully commit to either the monarchy or their desires drives them to dishonesty and infidelity. But even when they try to comply to The Crown, they’re unable to get over Camilla and Simon: 

In both shows, we get a big confrontation scene where each Prince informs their Queen that they want to choose love. In The Crown, Charles informs his mother that he’s suffering in his marriage and that he wants to separate form Diana. The Queen outright refuses this by claiming that it’s not Charles and Diana who are suffering, but the people who are forced to watch their disastrous marriage: 

This resonates a lot with Kristina’s comment to Wilhelm in episode 6:

Both Queens accuse their sons of being selfish and blind to their privilege. Elizabeth doesn’t even criticize her son’s actually reproachable behavior, but his inability to behave how people expect him to. Again, if we were to remove the context of the monarchy these would be pretty unfair things to say to your son. But these are not mothers. They are monarchs that had to kill their own selves for the Crown. And as the both of them see it, ‘The Crown must always win.’

Once again, the big difference between the two scenes comes down to framing. Although The Crown asks the audience to understand where Charles is coming from, it nonetheless presents him as lesser than his mother, who despite the difficulties still became Elizabeth Regina. As I mentioned before, The Crown tells us this is a sacrifice done for the people. And like his mother, Charles must suffer for the benefit of the people. That’s the Christ-like Passion of the Monarchy.  

In Young Royals, Wilhelm ultimately acquiesces to his mother. But rather than him fulfilling a noble sacrifice, this choice is framed as a betrayal. It’s a betrayal of Simon, but also of himself. It’s also a betrayal of Wilhelm by his own mother, who choses to protect the monarchy over her only living child.  

Beyond the framing, there is another key difference between how each show presents the idea that ‘The Crown must win’. The Crown justifies this belief by arguing that Elizabeth’s sacrifice is done for the people of the UK and the Commonwealth. The show does question if the monarchy is truly being of service to the people. Nearly always, the show answers this with a yes. And as long as it’s for that purpose, all of Elizabeth’s sacrifice is worth it.

In Young Royals though, this question is missing. I think this is choice was deliberate. We see that the public are interested in the Royals in the same way most people are interested in celebs. But we receive no in-story justification for why this institution must prevail, no Swedish public that is wanting or in need of a god-like monarch to sacrifice themselves for their sake.  

Of course, we still don’t know in which direction this story is going in regards to the monarchy. But from what we’ve seen so far, Young Royals is taking this idea of ‘The Crown’ must win’ and turning it into : but why must the crown win?

[catmintbreath]

as the world disappears

At the graduation ball at the end of his first year, Wilhelm makes a declaration.

Once the speeches are done and the floor is cleared for dancing, the headmistress turns to Wilhelm, who's standing near the podium, and says, "As crown prince, you have the privilege of leading the first dance. Please pick a partner." The way her eyes move to the girls standing near the front, it's clear who she expects him to choose.

Wille steels himself for what he's about to do as he steps down onto the linoleum floor.

Everyone watches with bated breath as he approaches the crowd. He does walk in the direction of the girls at first, and as he reaches a gaggle of third-year girls in fancy dresses, he can see them looking at him expectantly, hopefully, but Wille just smiles politely at them, and then passes them by. All eyes follow him in the hushed silence, curiously tracking his trajectory, seemingly uncertain of where it will end. Really, they should have known right away. Have they not heard the rumours, seen the two of them around the school?

As he gets closer to Simon, he can see things click for people. Distant gasps erupt when he faces Simon and holds out his hand.

Wille takes a deep breath. “Dance with me?” he asks softly. He hadn't told Simon he was planning to do this, intending it to be a surprise. 

Simon also takes a nervous breath, eyes darting around briefly to the people watching them, but reaches out and takes Wille’s hand. “I don’t know how to dance.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll lead. C'mon.” He pulls Simon gently towards the dance floor as stares follow them.

The headmistress looks so flabbergasted that Wille has to suppress an urge to laugh, but she doesn’t say anything to him. When the music starts, he takes one of Simon’s hands in his own and puts the other on the curve of Simon’s waist.

“Put your other hand on my shoulder,” Wille says, voice low so only Simon can hear.

Simon rests his hand there and then looks up at him. When their eyes meet, Wille feels a rush of love. He hardly ever gets to see this adorable, almost shy expression on his confident and outspoken boyfriend. It’s the one he wears when treading upon unfamiliar territory, like when he met the queen for the first time, and a side of him only Wille is lucky enough to see much of.

“Just follow my steps. One, two, three, four. One, two, three, four.” Wille picks up a count and Simon follows, a little awkwardly but not stepping on any toes.

Other people start to flood the floor slowly after their first dance, but Wille barely notices. They’re too caught up in each other’s gazes, the tension making their breaths come out unsteadily and the world fade around them. It’s surprisingly intimate, dancing like this. They’re in each other’s space, only inches apart.

When the slow dance starts, Wille leans his head down to settle on the curls above Simon’s forehead and closes his eyes, basking in the feeling of each point of contact between them: one pair of hands clasped together, Wille’s thumb rubbing back and forth on Simon’s fingers; the twin warmths of Simon’s side under his other palm and Simon’s hand grasping his shoulder; the feeling of soft curls tickling his face. He inhales deeply, filling his lungs with the familiar and comforting scent of the coconut oil Simon always uses on his hair.

Wille’s not sure how long they’ve been on the floor, waltzing and swaying together, when he opens his eyes to meet Simon’s and says, “Kiss me.”

Simon glances to the side. “Here?”

“Yeah.”

Simon needs no further reassurance. He smiles softly before tilting his head back and pressing their lips together. The kiss is chaste enough to not be too inappropriate in public while being just what Wille needed.

He can hear a few gasps and whispers from the remaining people around them and amusement joins the giddy contentment in his chest. It shouldn’t be a surprise to them after he danced with no one else the entire night.

They’re probably staring again. Let them.

He keeps their lips pressed together, sucking lightly on Simon’s bottom lip.

When they break apart, what passes between them through their gazes is heavy and loaded. Wille can feel his entire body flush with warmth. 

“Want to go back to my room?” Wille murmurs.

Simon nods, maybe a little too quickly. Wille lets go of him but holds on to one hand.

The crowd has begun to disperse a little as the music picks up into a lively jig for the end of the night, some people heading out into the night while others chat around what’s left of the catering. More eyes follow them as he leads Simon by the hand to the ballroom doors. They probably know exactly what Wille and Simon are about to do, but Wille is way too impatient at this point to feel any shame. He swears he can see Malin smirking in a corner before following them at a distance.

When they arrive at his dorm room, he says, “Malin, please don’t let anyone in, okay?”

Malin gives him a knowing nod that makes Simon snicker.

As soon as the door closes behind them, Wille presses him against it, lifting Simon’s chin with one hand to deliver the deep melting kiss he’d been thinking about half the night. He has to lean a little further down as Simon’s knees buckle slightly and Simon reaches up to tangle fingers in Wille’s hair.

“You made quite a point back there,” Simon murmurs when they break apart for air. Wille doesn’t miss the smugness in Simon’s grin. “You think they could tell we’re in a relationship?”

Wille lets out a breathless laugh. “I hope so. I don’t know how much more obvious I could make it.”

“You could declare your love for me on national TV.”

“Maybe I will.”

Wille kisses him again as his fingers sneak under the hem of Simon’s shirt at the back, meeting warm brown skin. There are no more jokes from Simon for a while.

AO3:

[alltoowille]

Wille disowning august has to be some sort of foreshadowing. August expects that being apart of the royal family is the one thing he will always have—he’s lost his father, his relationship with his mother, Felice, Årnas, Erik, and his place at the school he’s built his whole identity on—the only thing he has left is his distant affiliation with the royal family and the clout it gives him. He assumes that Wille will do what is expected of him, assumes that money and status matter as deeply to Wilhelm as they do to him, and it doesn’t even cross his mind that Wille would have different values than him. We see it over and over, from Wille’s point of view (no one cares about this stuff, he’s hysterical) but August still has every reason to believe that for the most part Wille will behave as expected. The whole point of the royal family is that they don’t change. Tradition, you are responsible for the school, you own it’s legacy. Wille is rejecting these things, deep down, and has been his whole life. But he’s never known that he could actively reject them until Simon looks him in the eyes and says “you expect everything to be on your terms.” He thinks about those words and he doesn’t understand at first. Nothing is ever on his terms. He couldn’t have denied it was him in the video if he wanted to, or so he thought. Simon validates the part of wille that has always rejected the parts of the crown he hates the most (family loyalty to no end, rich people and how they only look out for each other, tradition and shame and rules and privileges and punishments), and it’s this awareness that leads him to truly make his own decision for the first time the whole season. He gets to choose how to react to August. He could say anything. He could fight physically, beg for answers, and August is prepared for any of it. Instead Wille explains how he feels and then does what he knows August has never even considered in his worst nightmares—he disowns him. And then walks away.

It’s the first time we see wille claiming autonomy, and breaking with the entire point of the way he was raised. He breaks tradition. Everyone assumes he won’t, but now he has nothing to lose. The monarchy, the wealthy, the people who raised him who he expected to protect him have he knows has failed him and betrayed him. Erik is dead and he’s lost the only other person who made him feel real. I’m so high and this show is the craziest and most succint and poignant depiction of the ways that being queer is such an inherent part of who we are and the way we see the world that the desire he felt for Simon sparked an anger that allowed him to break tradition, even in this small way. August is family, his mother insisted. It’s not good enough, hiding for the sake of traditions that only continue to betray him. So he does whatever he wants. And what he wants is to not pretend, not spend the rest of his life being civil to august like nothing happened. None of that matters to him anymore. It’s the first time, but I really don’t think it will be the last.

[disasterlesbiansunite]

Just Two Things: A Young Royals Fix-It Fic

His mama had stood over him as she began talking. Wilhelm could hardly focus; the vision of the video (his video, his and Simon’s video, the video of Simon) burned into his brain on a constant loop. She hadn't asked him if he was alright, not yet, but he had stopped expecting her to early on in life. Duty first, he guessed, as usual. She pulled away and off the bed, rattled off the words about the interview he’ll do to protect the royal family et cetera, et cetera.

“I don’t want you to see Simon for the time being,” she said, and he glanced up, suddenly feeling like his world is fell away underneath him. He wished Erik were here, that Erik was still alive. If he were, then maybe this would all go away. He doubted any of it could now.

--

August brought him dinner that night when he’s too exhausted to even leave his bed. He said that Erik would want Wille to be himself - but how is August so sure of what Erik would want him to do to fix this, to just get this whole shitshow over with, when the only person who knows that is six feet under.

“Follow your heart, really.” August said. “Follow your heart.”

If anything his heart only thought of two things at the moment. One is the crumpled up rage he feels that’s been broiling under his skin since he saw the video; the screaming, panicked wild thing that wants to shout at the world and watch it shouts back until no part of him remains, no crown prince, nothing.

The other part of his brain thought of Simon. Holding him, soft and warm until his skin, kissing his neck and inhaling as much of him as possible. Kissing him, kissing Simon, an exhilarating feeling he can’t describe, he won’t ever be able to describe. Almost all of the girls he had kissed had kissed gently and slowly, like they were afraid he would disappear right next to them. It always felt like he was being kissed by air, a ghostly possession that was over in a second and just as uncomfortable.

He would have thought that Simon would kiss like that, he had thought Simon would kiss like that, Simon had kissed like that, before they really truly got to know one another. Now, Simon kissed hard and rough, like he knew Wilhelm wouldn’t disappear but just as quick, aware he couldn’t have him by himself ever. Simon’s kiss had the edge of sandpaper, tough grit and fine smoothness rolled into one. Simon kissed for the sake of it, like there was so much he wanted to do to Wille, do with Wille, that he simply couldn’t function enough to do anything but kiss him. Wille fell asleep soon after that, dinner discarded. He wondered if the last time they would ever kiss would be the time that caused both of him to want to recoil from society and away from the world. A part of him hoped so.

The nail on his thumb was raw and bleeding.

--

As he walked through Hillerska, everyone stared at him in pity. He was used to the stares, used to the way his simple presence shut up people around until all they could do was give him a dumb look. It was pity that was new to him, but he tried not to focus on that as Malin rushed with him to his first class of the day. He knew the things they were saying, drove himself insane as he googled himself over and over again, watching Sweden’s trending page unravel until it felt like it was all over. He watched as Simon walked into their classroom, turning heads for once in his life. Once except for the amount of times he had his, of course. He mindlessly made small talk with his classmate, but all he could think of were two things.

After class he rushed into the locker room to talk to Simon. He looked sullen, his features that were generally framed in a light source of their own were moody and dark, an awkward, ill fitting portrait. He wanted to kiss it all away. Instead, kicked at Simon’s foot, hooking the two into a game of footsie.

“What the hell are we going to do?” Simon asked, wrapping his hands around Wilhelm’s, as if he had any of the answers. Breaking news, he didn’t. All he could do was sit in silence and hold Simon, it felt like the only thing he could do. Unless…

“They’ve asked me to deny it was me in that video.” He could barely get the words out.

“Serious?”

Wille hummed, unable to interpret that reaction. “They want me to make a statement at the castle on Saturday.”

Simon turned, his head moving off of Wille's shoulder in a way that feels entirely unwelcome. Put that back please. Wille had realized that he could only really function anymore in Simon’s arms. As if he wasn’t touch starved enough, but Simon was hot and didn’t mind so it didn’t really matter. “But you’re not going to do it, right?”

“I don’t want to say anything.” Simon doesn’t get it, but Wilhelm doesn’t expect him too; too impossible to explain.

“But, Wille, everyone can see that it’s me in that video,” Wille groaned. He had forgotten that slightly important detail. Simon continued, “What am I supposed to do? But no matter what, they can’t dictate what you say,” Yes, they absolutely can, they’ve done it before.

We haven’t done anything wrong.” He had forgotten that too, spending so much time yesterday going over consequences and contingencies ranging from plan A to Z it made his head bled. But no one had actually told him that they hadn’t done anything wrong. Not even August, with his love is love attitude that came out of nowhere. Not even fucking him.

--

Mama had been waiting for him. Mama had met Simon. She never looked twice at Wilhelm, veiled disdain souring her mouth as she stared out the window.

“What? Why can’t I just have a relationship with him? And not say anything. Just live a normal life.” He knows why. He just wants to hear her say it.

“You’re the crown prince.” And there’s the world crashing back down onto him. “And that’s a privilege, not a punishment.” It’s both actually, but whatever, mama.

“Yes, but I didn’t ask for this!” Erik should be here. Erik would know what to do.

“Well, nobody has ever, ever asked for this,” his mama shot back. He feels like a little kid again, feels like biting his thumb raw. “You’re the only one who can take over the throne after Erik. Don’t you understand that?” He wished she would just look at him.

“You’re so young. When you’re young love feels like the most important thing in the world. When I was your age, I too had an unfortunate romance.” He wants to laugh or cry or release that panicked, clawed, anxious feeling that’s always been trapped underneath his chest, beating his heart faster and faster and faster. Unfortunate romance, she said, like Simon isn’t the best thing to happen to him, like Simon wasn’t the only one holding him together, like Simon wasn’t the only real thing in his world.

He snapped back into the conversation.“Is it worth it,” she continued. “If you feel that the attention you’ve been getting so far is unacceptable, it’s nothing compared to what you will endure for the rest of your life. We have a chance to cover this up. I urge you to take this chance. You may not get another.”

With Simon on one shoulder, and his mama and the world on the other, it turns out he was going to make the statement after all. Fucking great.

--

He felt like throwing up, but, to be fair, when hasn’t he.

“Are you ready?” His mama asked, like he could ever be ready to announce to the world, no that definitely was not me in that tape and that boy is definitely not the love of my life, thank you very much.

He dragged his feet, as he went into the room where Rosenqvists sits. Like Mama said, they only have one chance to not fuck this up.

Rosenqvist smiles at Wilhelm, her eyes hawkish. He musters as much of a smile as he can, playing with the buttons on his suit as the photographer directs the two around.

“It’s good to see you again, your highness.”

His eyes darted around the room. He could hear his mama and papa argue in the room they were in

“You too.”

The interview began then, menial questions about his existence that made him want to bite at his thumb. He resisted, knew that if Rosenqvist saw how his anxiety was surging through him like a freight train and mentioned it in her interview, his mama would be more angry then she already was. The questions are simple really, he barely thought about the answers and more about how Erik would have phrased them. Not like Erik would have been in this situation.

“So, Wilhelm, we both know why we’re here.” She smiled apologetically at him. Here we go. “As you are, no doubt, aware of by now there was a video from Hillerska that is going viral of what is rumored to be yourself and another male student,” she paused for a moment, uncomfortable with the what she’s about to say to a boy she’d been interviewing for most of his life, “being intimate. What do you have to say about these rumors, Crown Prince Wilhelm?” She’s less probing, then. He can tell his mom already prepped her on how exactly this interview needed to go. Fuck.

“That’s not-” his words got stuck in his throat.

“That’s not you in the video?” She filled, looking more and more saddened with each word, more maternal that he thinks he’s seen anyone in his entire life. He wanted to nod, wanted to do what his mama wanted for him, wanted to listen to what she feels is best for their country, because it is theirs now, isn’t it? Erik is dead and gone and never coming back no matter how much Wilhelm wishes he had been able to keep him alive. Wilhelm doesn’t exactly know much about what it takes to be king, not like Erik did, but he’s pretty sure a leaked tape is one thing a king is not supposed to have on his record. Wilhelm should want to deny the rumors, so why does it feel like every time he tries to open his mouth that it’s filled with cotton, that panicked wild thing grabbing hold of his brain and shaking it like his snowglobe. It’s begging him to choose the path of least resistance. And then there was Simon. Simon with his pretty soft voice and his even softer lips. Simon with his kind eyes and hands and just Simon, Simon, Simon. Simon, who has already been broken by the video and if Wilhelm denies their relationship then he’ll only break more. The only things he can think about. Just two things. Two things he can’t seem to choose between.

He took a deep breath. Erik would have wanted him to follow his heart, would have said that that would be how he becomes a great king. By being kind and good, and wholly himself.

He chose.

--

Simon’s mama shouts for a rematch as he laughed into his snack.

Ayub tensed next to him, “Oh, shit.”

“What’s up?” Simon asked, confused. Did his dad ask him to go home or something?

Instead, Ayub read from his phone: an online copy of this week’s Göteborgs-Posten screenshotted and reposted to Twitter. “The Crown Prince addresses rumors of Viral Video.”

“What?” He could have sworn Willie had said he wouldn’t do the interview. His mom and Sara exchange glances.

Ayub read on, “While the Royal Court denies rumors that the Crown Prince appears in the video that has gone viral this past week, his royal highness Prince Wilhelm goes more in depth on his time at Hillerska and the events surrounding the video. He says, ‘I started at Hillerska to focus on my studies and have kept to that.’ At this moment, the prince pauses and grows quiet.

‘That’s not the entire truth. The truth is that that is me in the video. I do not know who took it or why but the facts remain the same. There are many people who would want me to not address the rumors surrounding me at this time, and some even would want me to outright deny them, but I disagree. If I am to be king, and no matter what happens from this I will be king, I want to be the kind of king the people can be proud of, the kind of king my brother would have been, and the kind of king that if he saw me he’d be proud of. And that starts by being genuine and being myself to the citizens of Sweden and to the world.’ ‘Everyone should be allowed to live as gay or straight or whatever they want,’ says the Crown Prince. ‘And I suppose the former includes me, but I would still like this time to decide further who I am and what kind of king I will be.’”

Simon is stunned. Of all things, he didn’t think of this as even an option. He fishes his phone out of his pocket.

To Wille: just read the interview, what. the. fuck.

From Wille: Is that a good “what. the. fuck!!!” or a “bad what. the. fuck?!?”

To Wille: you’re so brave, wille, thank you

To Wille: also according to ayub youre trending as “gay king wilhelm” on twitter rn

From Wille: Fuck yeah, bow down to your king. Meet me before school starts tomorrow, courtyard?

To Wille: see you then, gay king willie

As Simon approached the school - having already been stopped by four journalists, three photographers, two nosy neighbors and one blogger - he could see as Wille nervously paced at the edge of the courtyard, his hand rubbed deep into his chest, shirt creasing around it. Simon couldn't even begin to imagine what had happened in the palace after Wille’s interview. From what he saw the queen didn’t really strike him as the accepting type, but that was one of those things he’d let Wille discuss on his own time. He snuck up behind Wille instead, held his arms and kissed his neck.

“Hello, my prince,” he said and twirled Wille around and into his arms. Wille let out a little sigh of relief and if he could have held Willie there for forever he would. Wille smiles at him and kisses him on the cheek.

“Can we just go one day Simon without having your weird relationship issues making a scene,” Sara huffed past and quickened her pace to the school. Simon hadn’t noticed the stares, it felt like everyone in the courtyard had been watching them from Felice to August to other boarders Simon couldn’t name, but that had definitely called him names. Simon can’t bring himself to care anymore.

“I’m so proud of you, Wille.” Wilhelm let out a little noise, the only amount of negative emotion that being schooled on refinement since before he could talk would allow. He grabbed at Simon’s coat and drew him in for a hug.

“I love you,” Wille said and suddenly Simon’s whole world had shrunk down to three words.

Wille quickly ended the hug and walked towards the school, his bodyguards following quick after. Simon speed walked up to him and grabbed his hand, “I love you too.” Wille broke out into that tiny golden smile Simon loved to tease out and grabbed Simon’s hand.

The stares followed but Simon didn’t care. “Just two things left,” he said, “Get through this last day before break and then find whoever took that video.”

“And then?”

“I haven’t gotten that far yet,”

Wille hummed and played with Simon’s as they settled at the doorway of their first class of the day, “You might want to work on your plans.”

“No, my plan only needs those two things.” Simon messied with Wilhelm’s hair and strolled into the classroom.

Wille followed after one hand fixing his hair, the other clutching at Simon’s hand, muttering, “Just two things?”

Just two things.

[billfarrah]

I’m starting to fear that S2 will suffer the equivalent of middle book syndrome. For example, the LT will be in 2/3 of the season until ep. 4, the last 1/3 was what I initially believed to be the theme of the whole season, Wille fighting against the Crown to be with Simon.

I think the LT will last a while, but like, I don’t really care?? The storyline will serve its purpose. I don’t think it’s a Wille vs Marcus situation, like, “who should I choose?” I don’t think it really matters. It’s more, is it worth it for Simon to get involved with Wille again? Will their relationship ever work? I think it has more to do with Simon questioning that rather than him actually being torn between two guys. But what do I know.

It’s really valid for Simon to feel like there isn’t really a chance for him and Wille, not just because of what happened last time, but because of how hard things will continue to be for them in s2. Being with Wille is like constantly waiting for a bomb to go off. It’s stressful as fuck and Simon knows Wille’s parents, his mother in particular, are very powerful people and don’t want him in Wille’s life. Simon dating someone else is devastating from Wille’s end (I legitimately feel sick when I think about how he’ll react), but ultimately Simon is just trying to protect himself.

But danger feels sexier and is more thrilling than safety, so I don’t think it’ll be easy for Simon.

I’m actually really excited to see Wille and Marcus interact and how they’ll act with each other. How much will Marcus know? I think this love triangle will be juicier than most average, bland ones simply because of how juicy the relationship between Wille and Simon is and the fact that Wille is the crown prince, so Marcus will likely already have an idea of who Wille is before interacting with him.

Love triangles are only as interesting as the characters involved in them, and I find the bad ones are often bad because they lack that - interesting characters and relationships. That’s not an issue here.

[ayellowcurtain]

Let me make you go down in history

Chapter 2

Simon watches him sleep again, thinking about their conversation last night. They never openly talk about the one talk that started all of the ones that followed, they just continue living their lives like months hadn't passed in between.

He thinks about when Wilhelm told him he loved Simon, and he didn’t say it back even though he felt it, very much so. He thinks about the texts Wilhelm sent him late at night after the first talk, outside his home before the holidays.

I want you

I WANT YOU

That’s what I want, Simon

And it felt overwhelmingly horrible because he found himself in that moment knowing Wilhelm so well he could read the hurt in those words, that Simon told him to figure out what he wanted like it wasn’t obvious, and that Wilhelm was hurt that Simon doubted him, even if for a second. He meant his words but maybe he wasn’t good at expressing them properly to Wilhelm. Simon doesn’t doubt his feelings, or how hard the whole situation is, your life suddenly changing upside down and then all over again in the space of weeks, between them meeting and Eric dying.

He didn’t reply to those texts either. They didn’t talk for almost three whole weeks. Simon was the one to give in, to check on Wilhelm, and it took him almost a whole day to get an answer.

He could still feel that Wilhelm was hurt by what he had told him the last time they met, but he could also tell Wilhelm was upset to be home, to be right in the middle of the reality he didn’t want to live, that he tried so hard to avoid but it wasn’t really his choice to make. He felt so cold, and tired, even through text, after the long wait to get any answers when Wilhelm was always so quick to answer when they were good.

Last night, while they were lying in the dark, right next to each other, still with barely to no touch or intimacy, Wilhelm said, “I’m not living the life I want. I don’t have any power to choose either. And it hurts me to think the only person that truly knows me thinks I’m choosing to not be with them.”

Simon moved to really look at Wilhelm but he kept looking up, like he was just voicing his thoughts to himself, and not to Simon right there. One of his arms underneath his head, and the other one just carelessly playing with his hair, getting very long at the top.

“Your friends don’t even know you like me. They know we had sex, that there’s a fucking...stupid sex tape out there. All the drama, and the shit. But they don’t know we were actually falling in love, that I wasn’t just...a guy that you were hooking up with.”

Simon knew Wilhelm meant his words, that he was being serious but it’s hard to take him serious when Simon thinks about how he’s the crown prince, the sweetest boy he’s ever met, and how what worries him is that Simon’s friends think they’re a random hook up, and nothing else.

“What?” Wilhelm propped himself on one elbow, a little bit of his worry being forgotten in the back of his mind, smiling at Simon. “What are you laughing about? I’m serious, Simon!”

“I know! I know!” He tried to stop laughing, taking deep breaths in, “It’s just that you have...so many other things to worry about.”

“I don’t, actually.”

“Wilhelm…” Simon held himself back from telling Wilhelm about how he’s about to become a king, taking care of so many strangers he doesn’t even know, a whole nation, countless different realities he has absolutely no idea about. He didn’t have to say it then and he doubts he’ll ever have to do it.

Simon knows it by being around Wilhelm, by watching every action being thought through over and over again, every word that Wilhelm holds himself back from saying, he knows that Wille is aware of how much responsibility he carries, liking it or not.

“You are the love of my life.”

Simon feels his mouth dry just thinking about it again, how speechless he was, looking at Wilhelm that seemed so calm and certain, like that was a natural conclusion he came to on the spot, finally turning to look straight at Simon.

They’re still so young. But he knows what Wilhelm was talking about, the feeling at least, that this is not something everyone has the opportunity to feel, especially not this young. Some people might live their whole lives without experiencing what they feel when they’re together.

"I really like you. And your smell..." Wilhelm moved slowly from his back to his stomach, half lying on top of Simon, gently nuzzling against his neck, breathing so slow it made Simon's skin go rough, and sensitive.

"And your taste..." He kissed Simon's neck, making him close his mouth, pressing his lips tightly together to not make a single noise that he knows he can do.

"Wille..."

Wilhelm purred in response, and Simon tried to breathe normally, putting his hand on the back of Wilhelm's neck, squeezing to ground himself, holding himself back from giving in, finally kissing Wilhelm.

"Stop..."

He did as he was told, and looked at Simon, with his messy hair, bright red cheeks, and sad eyes, clearly sad that Simon is still very much trying to keep their close friendship just a friendship.

He moved back, avoiding meeting Simon's eyes, lying back in bed, looking up at the boring, white ceiling.

“Sorry…”

Wilhelm lifted his hips up to turn, moving heavily to lie on his other side, his back to Simon, his arms crossed awkwardly over his chest, and Simon snuggled closer, putting his arms around Wilhelm’s waist, burying his nose against his back, holding his hands when Wilhelm adjusted his position to hold his hands.

“Don’t leave me.”

“Never.” Simons squeezed his hands, kissing his back. “I’ll never leave you, Wilhelm.”

“I’m doing things on your terms.”

Simons smiled, closing his eyes, pushing his face against Wilhelm’s back.

He’s so perfect, still asleep in the same position they were last night. And it’s so hard not to be with him completely.

Wilhelm listens to Simon like very few could even try, and Simon is amazed that he’s real, and that he likes Simon, having the whole world on his feet, Wilhelm likes Simon.

Wilhelm opens his hands suddenly in his still half asleep haze, and their fingers intertwine again, and it doesn’t take long until they fall asleep holding each other tight again. Simon wishes he was even more present to hold Wilhelm tighter if he knew what would come after.

The holiday weeks away from each other felt shorter than the months that came after that night. Looking back now, Wilhelm’s words now feel like a warning. Simon never really wanted them to be apart, he just needed Wilhelm to understand life doesn’t go as he wants and when he wants it, at his pace, that Simon would just sit quietly, and accept half a person because he’s sure he deserves better.

Wille needs the time, and the space to focus on himself. Or at least Simon thought he could understand all of that while still being around, as a friend, his best friend. Simon said Wilhelm needed to figure out what he wanted because it would be easier if they kept some distance between them. Wilhelm had a lot going on, and Simon didn’t want to be in his way, holding him back - or himself back - in any way.

So Wilhelm found a way to keep himself busy and distant. Or studying, or with his bodyguards working out very early in the morning, or with the boys, his friends that slowly filled some of the space Simon had left.

They still talked, it seems impossible for them to be completely away from each other, but Wilhelm was distant, like he didn’t want to get too close, afraid to cross Simon’s limits or to get too close and not be able to hold himself back.

Even from afar, Simon knew Wilhelm wasn’t doing as good as he pretended to be doing. His nails were so short, the corners of his fingers were always bruised. While in class, he kept tapping his feet, taking too many long breaths, trying to calm himself.

Simon thought about reaching out, just hugging him to see if it would help, but he held himself back. He was the one that said Wilhelm needed to figure things out, that things weren’t going to be as Wilhelm wanted...

Months went by filled with the growing anxiety in both of them, and with that, Simon started to lose his mind slowly with the lack of Wilhelm, of talking to him, of just being close to him with nobody else around, making sure he was okay. He missed how they were around each other, how he felt when he was in constant contact with Wilhelm, being themselves, he missed kissing him…

To Wille: hey

He texts him late at night again, feeling stupid for how anxious he gets, how his eyes start to water with frustation, and anger, and the overwhelming yearning.

To Simon: hi

To Wille: are you busy?

The bubbles appear, and disappear and Simon rolls his eyes, feeling like throwing his phone against the nearest wall.

To Simon: no haha

It’s late, I’m in bed.

Why?

Did something happen?

Simon shakes his head, closing his eyes not to cry. Fuck it, he thinks as he types quickly.

To Wille: I miss you

Can we meet?

He keeps checking but he never gets a text back. Simon drops his phone on his bed and gets up, walking around in stupidly small circles because he’s staying at school this year after all. He couldn’t let his sister stay here alone, and she was happy to find her magical way to put him inside too.

Wilhelm is too good of a listener, too polite and good to disobey any order, ever. This is Simon’s worst nightmare and exactly what he asked Wilhelm to do, doesn’t matter if the scenario helps him or not. It means Wille will follow his mom’s requests or Simon’s because that’s who he is. Too good at following orders.

Suddenly, three knocks on his door, and Simon jumps, looking at the door. He exhales a smile, rushing until he’s holding the doorknob, trying to calm himself. He opens the door carefully and Wille is there, hands deep inside his pockets, his shoulders up high, one bodyguard right behind him.

Simon exhales, standing to the side, and Wilhelm gets inside, holding the door for himself, closing and locking it behind him. Simon walks to his nightstand, leaning against it, holding the edge tightly, looking at Wilhelm and nobody else. They’re finally alone, and Wilhelm is bare, like Simon is used to seeing him, no walls around him, the thick walls he builds filled with small, quiet answers, with people around them to keep them from giving in.

His eyes are soft again, filled with expectations, and he adjusts his hair behind his ears like he does when he’s nervous, Simon is surprised he’s not biting his nails too.

“I’m really tired of my terms…” Simon exhales shakingly, “Like...really tired.”

He crashes into Wilhelm before he can think twice, holding his face in his hands, kissing him like he’s been thinking for months, and Wilhelm holds him right back. His hands feel cold even through the thin fabric of Simon’s shirt, squeezing his waist tightly, stumbling back, trying to find the bed.

“No video game today?” Wille asks against his lips, smiling so bright. Simon shakes his head, quick to take Wille’s shirt off, pushing him to sit on the bed.