That Time I Hooked Up With A Tumblr Mutual
Ok. Let me start by saying this is not a callout post, and this should be read as a humorous story, with some takeaway lessons at the end. Please enjoy my story of my weird ass encounter with a Tumblr mutual.
Part 1: The Backstory
Alight so boom. I had just returned home from a trip where I met a different Tumblr mutual. That trip was great but didn't end up going to plan, so long story short, ya girl was horny. I had never really had a one-night-stand or sought out a solely sexual hookup, so I started thinking maybe I could try it out, see how I like it. And through the sheer power of manifestation, that opportunity presented itself.
I was scrolling Tumblr and one of my mutuals posted asking if anyone was in (my area) and wanted to hang out. Mind you, I have never spoken to this mutual before. No DMs, maybe like 1 or 2 comments through tags and that's it. But, most of my moots are far as fuck, so when I saw she was near me I was like oh ayo, I'm free! Why not, I had nothing else going on! So I reply, and she DMs me.
So she introduces herself, we'll call her Chicle for reasons I'll get to later in the story lmao. Anyway, she gushes a little bit, saying she's been too shy to DM me and that I'm a really cool tattoo artist mutual, I say she's cute and seems cool, and she asks if I've ever been to this particular mall. I say I have and if she wants to cruise the mall with me. She says yeah I'd love to cruise the mall and "if I like her vibe, then maybe we can do something more fun." I say I'm down, she gives me her number.
So here is what I'm envisioning. We'll meet up at the mall, walk around and talk, get to know each other, have some laughs, get a snack, it was a Friday so maybe we could go out to like a bar or go dancing, and then maybe after that, possibly make-out or even have sex! I am not opposed to having sex after a first date if I'm really vibing with the person and if we've been talking for a bit before. Girls, this is not what happened.
Part 2: The Meeting
I get ready, and I drive to the mall. I park, we text on where to meetup and I head over to the Gamestop. I see her at the counter, go up and I'm like "are you buying Pokemon cards?" She starts laughing, she says "I didn't want you to see this!" I'm laughing, I told her it's cute, she finishes paying and we walk around. Cute start and thennnn it all starts to go downhill from here.
As we are walking out of the Gamestop, a minute and thirty seconds into meeting this stranger, she wraps her arm, not around my waist...but around my ass. And pulls me close. I'm instantly uncomfortable by how close this gesture is. She starts cooing in my ear about how she's "so glad I'm not a catfish" and "if I like her vibe because she really likes mine". We met not even 5 minutes ago, I have not had time to evaluate any vibes! But anyway! She asks if she wants smoke 🍃 so I agree, and we go outside, right across from where we just were.
I get to take like 1 hit from this pen, she then steps close to me and says "I'm so glad you're real" kisses me and squeezes my ass. I again feel the need to emphasize that at this point, it has still been less than 5 minutes since we've met, and we have exchanged about 10 messages only a couple hours prior. This is a stranger to me. ANYWAY.
We go back inside, she asks if I wanna walk around, I agree. We chat for a short bit of time, before we go to the food court. I wasn't hungry, so she got some food and we sat and talked. I had made some mention about my past and she wanted to know more so I'm like "okay, I'll give you my lore while you eat" so I basically tell Chicle my life story. Afterwards, we go to walk around more and I start trying to ask her questions so I can get to know her more. It becomes very apparent that she is not interested in getting to know each other lmao. I ask what she does for work, and what she's interested in, and she tells me she's interested in getting into (something animation related) and i'm like "oh ayo, that aligns with what I do" and start trying to get more info cause i'm curious, annd I get just the shortest fucking answers. Ok.
She ends up making a comment about how I'm probably more experienced than her, and I'm like "oh really? Well how many people have you been with?" and Chicle asks "are we counting online?" Now, there is nothing necessarily wrong with this...but it does become more clear on just how "online" this person is. Anyway, she has only been with a few people, never had a partner. It becomes very clear as to why she may have never had a partner.
Part 3: Inappropriate Behavior
We are walking around the mall, stopping in a few stores to look at stuff. Chicle is walking next to me and I am still trying to invoke conversation. But Chicle is not interested in conversation, because instead, she is deliberately and blatantly staring directly at my tits. What I mean is, mid-walking, she is at my side, craning her head to the side to make it incredibly clear that that is what she is doing. I straight up ask "are you...staring at my tits?" she confirms as such, and says something about her being a dog. The dog thing will come up again.
Chicle is at different points, holding me, kissing me, and saying various suggestive things. She grabs me and whispers in my ear "do you want to go back to my room" and I nervous laugh and say "uhhh, we'll see!" At another point, she says "you're so small, you want me to manhandle you and throw you around?" and I again nervous laugh. We're like in Hot Topic, and she start trying to makeout with me and grabbing my ass and says "you're making me so hard"(we'll put a pin in that) and I push her away and say "not in public". I can do a little PDA but this is a lot, and at this point I have known her for about 40 minutes, maybe an hour.
Continuing on, as we're walking through this crowded mall, she drapes her arm over my shoulder and starts grabbing my boob and trying to pinch my nipples, which I immediately pull away from and again say "not in public". Chicle again says "do you wanna get out of here and go back to my room" and I'm questioning what exactly she means, because the phrasing is a little weird. "what do you mean 'your room'?" and she says "I have a hotel room" so I'm a little confused cause I thought she lived in the area. She does.
"i got us a room"
Ya'll, this bitch preemptively booked a MOTEL ROOM without even asking me.
At this point, she has asked multiple times and each time I nervous laughed and said "haha maybe, we'll see, ehhh we'll see" To any normal person, my body language was extremely clear that I was uncomfortable. And again this is not a callout post, she is not a bad person, and everything that ultimately happened, I did consent to. But I will not sugarcoat the fact that this behavior was definitely inappropriate harassment, and there was absolutely some pressuring with the continuous asking. But as I mulled it over, there were 2 reasons I ultimately decided to agree and meet her at that motel.
I was craving intimacy
I had never done something like this before so..fuck it, let's do it for the plot.
And so, she gave me the address, we got in our respective cars, and we met at the motel.
Part 4: The Motel
We go to the room, put our stuff down, and I go to use the restroom. I'm thinking "oh shit, this is weird but alright, let's see what happens"
I come out of the restroom, wash my hands, and she comes over and we start kissing. Already it's fucking weird because the way she is kissing me is so goddamn fast, it's like someone inhaling a meal because they think it's gonna run away from them. Now idk about ya'll, but I like a slow, deep kiss. So already it's a mismatch, but whatever. She lifts me onto the sink, despite the weird kissing, it's hot. She has some really minty gum in her mouth, hence the name Chicle. Put a pin in that.
After a bit, we go to the bed, and I keep saying "how did you get me here" because honestly, I'm not fully comfortable, it's just a weird situation for me and I'm surprised I agree to it. But agree to it I did, so we get on the bed, and keep going. Now, even though she does not have much experience, she's not bad! But...I can tell there's certain things she's doing that I've seen. Or rather, read. Whew lad.
As we're getting into it, my clothes are coming off, she's saying "You're my favorite Tumblr mutual. I can't believe this is what my favorite Tumblr mutual is into." I don't even really know what to say to this because quite frankly, mentioning social media in bed in any capacity is kinda fucking cringe. But it just gets worse.
So, she's spitting on my pussy. And I, personally, have a strong aversion to spit. It's something that I tell anyone that is a potential sexual partner, but it this case, we obviously did not have a prior talk about our sexual boundaries. In this case, I'm like "okay whatever as long as it's just there" but I quickly say "hey uh, just please don't do that in my mouth or i'll throw up" lmao. She's like "Oh okay sorry sorry". But then at some point, without warning she smacks the FUCK out of my pussy, and I'm so taken aback I immediately say "UH DON'T DO THAT" and she again apologizes and says
"Oh sorry, you know I had to try that one. Like that Tumblr post, you know the one."
Ya'll, everything this bitch is doing, she is referencing posts from Tumblr. She is referencing the sexy fantasy butch/femme text posts from Tumblr and she is referencing them out loud. In the middle of real life sex.
She goes on to reference more posts, and the worst part is I know exactly the one's she's talking about. "Mutuals to lezz out with" etc etc, it's so fucking cringe, and she tells me about how she started wearing more of a certain article of clothing after I reblogged a picture of her in it and how embarrassed she is to admit that (I thought that was kinda cute actually) anyway
She's still going way too fast with like all her movements, I tell her to slow down and relax and I think at this point I mention how she did not have to do all that PDA shit from before. She says "well you know, on my Tumblr I do say I'm a dog" and then uh, she starts barking. 💀 literally starts going "woof, woof" and I tell her to s t o p. Jesus fucking christ.
Anyway, after mentioning Tumblr and calling me her favorite Tumblr mutual way too many fucking times, I'm on top of her. Mind you, this whole time, I'm kinda in and out dissociating, just due to how not fully comfortable I am with this. But ya know, I'm still going for it. Her shirts off, she has really cute boobs, and then I notice a really fucking huge bulge in her pants. And I fully dissociate. Not gonna lie, I started feeling really panicky, because straight up, I was not prepared for this. Physically, I'm still touching her, but my mind is fully disconnected, and I'm thinking "oh fuck. When she said 'you're making me so hard' was she being literal? I don't know if I'm comfortable with this. Should I tell her I want to stop? But I don't wanna hurt her feelings. Should I just take it? Well no, I don't really want to...maybe I'll just say 'hey is it cool if I don't touch it?' I mean, she's cute so ehhhhh let's just see what happens!" SO. We continue on.
We flip and she's now on top of me. She references another fucking Tumblr post, and says "do you wanna suck on this lesbian cock?", unzips her pants and pulls out...this MASSIVE transparent strap on. And I'm like oh, it was fake LMAO. Then I say "...yeah, so that's not going in me"
She ends up taking it off, I don't even know how the fuck she hid it in her jeans that entire time, and we continue on. Around this point, I'm starting to feel pretty spent, she did some other things like opening up my pussy to stare at it and describe the color, whatever, I'm kinda done and I just wanna cuddle. So we cuddle for a bit and again, it's physically nice but it's just so weird because she is SUCH a stranger to me that I can't get fully comfortable. She starts trying to start up again and I'm just not really in the mood anymore. She keeps playing with my nipples and typically whenever I'm touched in a way I'm not digging, I'll just take their hand and move it away as a silent but pretty clear way to indicate "no". But uh, I had to do that like 4 times with her before I verbally say "hey, please stop" and her response is "why" 💀 like wdym "why" bitch, cause i said so. I'm kinda surprised by this response so I start to say "Uhhhh, it's...kinda specific" and she goes "oh okay, sorry sorry".
So, honestly, I kinda just wanna go home but I don't wanna be mean and just take off. But there's also no way in hell I'm sleeping over in this motel room. So, I suggest we go out and maybe go to a club or something and she's like "uh, no. I don't like going out" 💀 like damn, maybe you should spend less time on FUCKING TUMBLR AND TRY GOING OUT IRL but whatever, instead we just go get food and bring it back to the room.
Part 5: What Could Have Been
We got some burgers, and she wants to open the Pokemon cards. We do, that's fun and cute, and she asks if I wanna keep some of the stickers that came in one of the packs.
Then she tells me that she had went to the library and checked out a book on tattoos since "she knows I'm a tattoo artist, and thought we could flip through it together." And I genuinely think this is such a cute fucking gesture, I think it's really sweet, and it frustrates the fuck out of me because of what this could have been.
I told her that she did not have to do all the PDA, it was a lot and it was excessive. She is not apologetic about it, and says that the reason she was like that was because "she needed me to know what her intentions were and that this was not just a 'friendly' meeting." so I reiterate that she did not have to do ALL OF THAT just for me to know that. And she just insists that in the past, girls have treated her like just a "bestie" so she needed to get her point across. Now call me old fashioned, but you could have just verbally fucking communicated "hey, i'm really attracted to you" and I would have caught the fucking drift. But okay!!
She asks me if I have any knives because I guess femmes tend to have a knife collection. I say no. And she fucking pulls out this huge ass lethal switchblade thing and is like "this is mine!" and i'm like oh god, this is it, I'm gonna fucking die in this motel room. But she doesn't kill me, she just shows me the cool knife and then puts it away. I have known this person for like 4 hours.
So, we flip through the book, and it's funny and cute, but she keeps trying to kiss me and instigate, and i'm just not interested, I just wanna flip through the book and go the fuck home. And that's pretty much what happens, we finish, I'm like "aight, ima head out" but
before i do
we end up making out again and then I think she was helping me put my shoes on?? she's on her knees in front of me and...she asks me to spit in her mouth. Once again, I have a major aversion to spit and i really, truly, do not want to spit in her mouth. But she says please...so I do like a half assed spit and hope it's good enough. She asks me to try again....so I get an accumulation and spit in her mouth, and she swallows it and i am so so sad about it 😭 and I finish getting my shit and I go the FUCK HOME.
Now here is what frustrates me about all this. Physically? This girl is extremely my type. I like the way she dresses, she has really nice arms, she has a cute face, she's really fucking attractive. She's interested in getting into the animation industry, which I'm currently also working on getting into as well. We could have talked about that and really had a cool discussion on what kind of projects she wants to do and what style she works in. She likes video games, we could have talked more about what games we like. She got this tattoo book because she knows I'm a tattoo artist, and I think that's really fucking cute. There's so many non-sexual aspects that could have made this a real fucking date where I got to know this person, and feel comfortable, and then we could have had really great sex because straight up, the girl was good. She may have learned it from Tumblr, and some of it was weird, but for the most part? She was damn good, especially for only having limited experience. This could have turned into something real! But NO. Chicle, instead, wanted to grope my tits in front of families an hour into meeting me, and made no effort to really let me get to know her in any capacity whatsoever! And it's not like she wanted this to be just a one-night-stand, because she had told me she was looking for a gf and asked me what I was looking for!
It just could have been so much better than this weird ass situation. And after the fact, she texted me and I answered a couple times, but when the following morning she said something to the effect of "it felt so good having you on my lap" I just never answered. Because prior to this, there was absolutely no established relationship, friendship or otherwise. And I could not see anything moving forward, because we couldn't backtrack into the aforementioned "could have been". I considered communicating how I didn't actually feel super comfortable with how things went, but I ultimately just decided to not reply. Shitty on my part, but again, there was no prior anything. And we just never spoke again, we remained mutuals, and so I never talked about this because uh, obviously she would see it. But since she blocked me, heyho now you all get the story!
Part 6: Epilogue
Now, the reason I decided to call her Chicle (Spanish for Gum)
So, while the nice minty gum was a nice gesture, her spitting that gum juice all over my vagina resulted in me getting a yeast infection💀 No more hookups.
So what lessons did we learn!
It's important to talk about sexual boundaries before having sex with someone!
Internet fantasy is not real life! Don't just do shit because you read about it in a fucking internet post or saw it in porn! (Especially when that person doesn't even make those kinds of posts, i don't reblog most of those for a reason)
Don't chew gum before going down on someone
Communication overall is really important for setting up any foundation, even if it is just a one-night hookup!
(yes this is ok the RB cause I spent forever writing this and I do genuinely think it's a very funny story. Sometimes ya just gotta do things for the plot so you get a good story out of it. No regrets, and my pussy is all healed up lmao)
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The List ~Pt. 10 - Convergence~
Alastor (Hazbin Hotel) x Reader
Summary: The fight with Vox triggers memories of your life on Earth, but a familiar voice calls to you. When you wake, you find an unexpected hand has helped you but of course their aid comes with a catch. More secrets are brought to light and you must choose whose side you're truly on.
Themes: Huge warning for depictions of war/ bombings/ injuries/ death. With everything going on in the world I understand if it is hard to read so feel free to skip the ~8 ish paragraphs.
The usual angst, mystery, sassiness, cursing, fluff, actual plot, mentions of blood/bodily harm, slow burn, Lucifer can't take a hint, Alastor is full of surprises, eventual smut, and of course 18+
3k Words
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 7.A
Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 (You're on it!) Part 11 Part 12
**sentences in italics are internal thoughts of the reader
Like a movie, you watch different places around the world flash before your eyes. Each scene, you’re surrounded by the same small group of people. A feeling of pride filled your body when you looked at them. Are these people my family? They feel like it. You knew you’d do anything to protect them.
~~I’m here love…
A final flash puts you at an eerily familiar scene. You sit at the end of a small table, watching everyone laughing, eating, singing - just enjoying the down time together. The sound of an air siren puts an immediate silence over the tent. All eyes snap to you, waiting for your guidance. You stand from your chair, “Alright just like training guys, take your assigned positions around the camp and keep a clear - “, ringing pierces your ears as everything goes black.
~~You’re stronger than this…
In what feels like a second, you are lying face down on the warm ground. How long was I down for? Pushing yourself to your knees, you watch blood from your face make little droplets in the dirt below you. Dust and smoke fill the air, burning your lungs when you try to take a breath. Fuck…Where is everyone? You look at what remains of the camp around you. Piles of brick, wood, and rock litter the area. The night around you is hauntingly silent, interrupted only by the occasional pop of electricity from what remained of the generators. As the dust begins to settle, you’re able to make out multiple sets of boots under rubble nearby. No…no...no…no please...
You attempt to run towards them but stumble back to the ground. A mix of dirt and blood coat the front of your uniform. Other than the pain in your side, you have no way of knowing the true extent of your injuries as a numbness washes over you.
~~Fight…please my dear…
Sounds of tumbling brick and coughing distract you from your self-evaluation. You crawl towards the sound and find a man trying to sit up, pushing away the rubble that buried his lower body. “Thank God, you have no idea how relieved I am to - “, an involuntary gasp leaves your mouth when you see the piece of metal sticking right through him.
He half-heartedly laughs, “I was going to make some smartass comment like - How bad is it doc? Think I’ll be home for dinner? - but uh…I think that answered my question.” Fucker always had to make jokes, even the face of death.
“No it’s not..It’s not that bad. I just need to find my bag, I can stop the bleeding….just…k-keep talking to me.” Your hands fumble across his chest. You try to apply pressure while your eyes frantically scan the area for your medical bag, but Lord only knows where it ended up after the explosion.
~~Please…we need you…
Warmth continues to spread under you, his blood now staining your hands and arms. He grabs your hands, stopping your efforts and gently setting them on his face, “Don’t do this - ya know how it’s going to end.” A single tear slips past your lashes and down your cheek. His breathing begins to labor, “Hey now boss lady, no cryin’. We all knew what we signed up for. This ain’t your fault.”
~~I need you…
A deafening sound fills the air followed by a blinding flash of white light.
Your eyes bolt open as you sit up gasping for air. Alastor nearly jumps out of his chair, hastily sitting himself behind you in bed to wrap his body around yours, “I’m here, dear. Breathe. You’re safe.” You try to relax in his arms while your mind reels. Was that a dream? A memory? Is that…how I died?
You look down remembering the fight with Vox. Other than a few blood stained cotton bandages, you appear to be mostly healed. “How -?” you begin to ask. Alastor tightens his grip on you, making you wince from the pressure on your still healing wounds. “Please…just…give me a moment.” he begs quietly into your neck. You feel his chest rise and fall against you with ragged breaths. If it was anyone other than Alastor, you would think he was crying.
Gentle sounds from the wooded bayou fill the room. After a few moments, he breaks the peaceful silence, “Don’t ever scare me like that again.” he breathes through a raspy voice. You lean your head back to look up at the demon. He looked just as rough as he did that night in the tower.
You bring your hand to his cheek and pull him into a tender embrace against your lips. He sighs into your mouth as his body relaxes. He needed to feel you, to know you weren’t gone. The corners of your mouth curl into a smile, “I don’t know how but I heard your voice…through the darkness you were calling to me. Even as I dreamt of my life on Earth.” Alastor huffs amusingly, “My dear, I never left your side. Charlie said talking to you might help. I thought it was silly really but I was willing to try anything. Good to know my efforts weren’t in vain.”
Alastor delicately brushes his fingers through your hair, “I didn’t think it was possible to feel something worse than the initial fall into Hell, but you seem to enjoy keeping me on my toes. As much as I hate to say it, you might not have made it if Lucifer hadn’t -”
“Lucifer!?” you yell in surprise at how casually Alastor mentions him, “Why would he bother saving me?” A few taps on the door interrupt before you can get an answer. Without waiting for a response, Lucifer walks into the room, “Ah good you’re awake.” he chirps casually.
You swing yourself to the edge of the bed in an attempt to stand but Alastor keeps a firm hold on your hips, slotting you between his legs to keep you sitting. He scolds quietly in your ear “Easy love, let’s not move too quickly. You’re still healing.”
Lucifer makes his way across the room, puffing his chest out arrogantly as he leans against his cane, “There were only a few wounds I couldn’t get completely healed but you seem to be a strong one! Of course someone had their doubts.” he glares at Alastor, lip nearing a snarl.
He did help when he didn’t need to, ulterior motives or not I should be grateful. You muster a smile and cool tone, “Well you did wonderful, sir. I am feeling pretty good to be honest. Thank you. I suppose I owe you.” What the fuck did I just say?
Alastor exhales against your neck and digs his fingertips into your sides, making you curse at him under your breath. It didn’t help how smug Lucifer suddenly looked. He nonchalantly fiddles with his suit, “Well we do have some private matters to discuss. If you’re feeling up to it of course.” No but do I have a choice?
“Sure! What’s going on?”
“I uh - would prefer there to not be an audience, if you don’t mind.” Lucifer shuffles his cane to his other hand. Your chest hitches at the request. I rather not be alone with this man right now. Alastor notices your apprehension, “Anything you have to discuss can be said in my company. You have quite a nasty habit of putting your hands - amongst other things - where they don’t belong.” his tone cut with such sharpness even the well collected King looked visibly uncomfortable. You feel him disappear from behind you only to reappear in a chair by the fire behind Lucifer, “You may continue sir.”
Lucifer scoffs but doesn’t speak right away. You fumble nervously with your hands as his eyes burn into you. Chills creep across your skin from the tension filling the room.
“Soooooo - what did you need to speak about, sir?” you ask wearily, wanting to get this conversation over with. “I told you to call me Lucifer,” he takes a seat next to you on the bed, “And I think you know damn well what we need to talk about.” his once sickeningly sweet voice now harsh with ire.
Cool, nothing like pissing off the King of Hell. You try to hide the anxiety building in your chest, “Lucifer, I appreciate your offer from the other day however I am staying here. With the sinners and with Alastor. I am capable of -”
“Yes, yes - you looked quite capable as you were dying in my arms just a few nights ago!” he bites, “Do you think you’re of any use to the people you claim to want to help if you’re dead? Do you think he will actually support you in your efforts?” his eyes dart to the demon across the room.
“Oh and you will!? You want to keep me like a pet in your little castle! Remind me, how did wanting such things from Lilith turn out for you?”
An unsettling smile crosses his face, making a pit form in your stomach, “You tread on thin ice my dear. If you wish to take low blows, fine. You’re naive to think he actually loves you. You said yourself, he just wants to use you -”
“I was wrong. I was only naive to think you did not want to use me.” you interrupt plainly. R̷͈̈u̸̦͌l̸͍̍e̴͔̅ ̷͉͛#̸̗͒1̶͍͂ ̵̮̐B̵̬̊e̷͖͐ ̵̡́o̵̡̿p̵͎͂e̴̢̋n̷̡̆ ̵͚̋t̵͕͠o̵͔̽ ̵̺̉t̶̰͗ȓ̴̠ů̷̹s̶̩̄t̴̙̅,̸̈́͜ ̶͉̓b̶̘͗ǔ̵̮t̶̯̂ ̸̝̿n̴̳̍ȅ̷͔ṿ̵̀e̴̗̾r̸̨̔ ̵̻͒ḑ̶̾ǫ̴̉ ̴͎̉ś̴̤ō̴̩ ̴̣̒b̶͉͠ḻ̸͗i̶̳̽ṋ̷̀d̶͉͒ĺ̵̘y̸̙̕
He cocks his head and raises an eyebrow, “I - I don’t know what you mean. I - I saved you. I protected you when - when he couldn’t. Of course I would have never allowed you to get hurt in the first place.” Alastor clears his throat and shifts in his chair, using every ounce of restraint to not lose his tongue. His eyes pinpoint to Lucifer through a sharp grin.
I’m not the only one on thin ice here. “I appreciate you helping me, truly. But I think we both know deep down…you’re scared. You’re weaker than you let on. Locking yourself away, ignoring your duties. Without Lilith you’ve become just a shell of the ruler you once were. And, not to sound arrogant, but I get the feeling you think I can somehow change that.”
Lucifer’s look softens and he takes your hand, eyes glued to his thumb tracing across your palm, “I’ll admit there’s some truth to your words. She was my strength. She knew how to lead better than I ever could. The city has gone to shit without her. But…” his other hand cups your cheek as he meets your gaze, “...you can change all of that. Standing by me, you can do so much good for our people. Isn’t that what you want?” his words seem to plead with you. You hear a crack from Alastor’s grip tightening on the arms of his chair.
You shoot a glance at him, silently asking him to calm down. With a gentle touch, you take Lucifer’s wrist to remove his hand from your face, “I want to save souls, Lucifer. Charlie’s dream is incredible and I plan on helping her see it through. I do not wish to assist in the rule of Hell.” You say soft but stern, trying to make him understand. He stands abruptly to look down at you, “Does this demon share these same sentiments?”
Fuck he does NOT let up. “I don’t understand. Why are you so against him!?” you raise your voice making the Radio Demon’s ears twitch.
Lucifer kneels in front of you, tightly gripping your shoulders, “Listen to me…” Alastor stands to say something but you raise a hand to stop him. You wince as slender fingers dig deeper into your skin and the King’s voice darkens to a whisper, “He will never stop trying to gain more power. You want to save souls yet you stand by someone who would sacrifice anyone and anything to get what he wants. You help bring him to power…and he will destroy everything. You, me, Charlie…He - won’t - stop.”
Your heart pounds against your chest, fighting against the thoughts racing through your mind, “How are you so sure about his intentions?” you squeak out. He gently brushes some hair away from your face, “My sweet girl, there are darker secrets to him than you know. Secrets, I fear, that will destroy you.”
“That is enough.” Alastor’s voice warns with a heavy static.
Lucifer angrily stands back up, bringing you to your feet with him, “Why can’t you just trust me? Have I not proven myself enough? He will take away everything.” Your hands press against his chest in an attempt to keep him from getting any closer, “Please, stop! He -”
The lights of the room begin to flicker. Alastor grabs Lucifer away from you by his jacket collar and pins him against the wall, “I said that was enough.” he spits. The two men snarl nose to nose before Lucifer lets out a jarring laugh, “Oh-ho - so she really doesn’t know? How far are you going to try and bury the truth?” he peeks over Alastor’s shoulder to you, “See my dear this is what I mean. If he truly loved you, he would have been honest about his - situation.”
Alastor pulls back and slams Lucifer’s smaller body against the wall again, seething through gritted teeth, “You have no right to -”
“W-what is he talking about?” You brace yourself against the bedpost and take a step towards them. Lucifer shoves Alastor off, sending the pissed off demon half way across the room. His body hits the wooden floor hard enough for the planks to creak beneath him. He half-heartedly struggles to pull himself up onto one knee, panting like a dog about to attack.
Lucifer saunters over to you. You hear a low growl from Alastor as he watches the small King move his hands over your waist and his lips to your ear, “His soul is bound to another. He only needs you because your power combined can break him free. And what do you think he’ll do the moment he is unchained?” he breathes through a wicked smile. Your entire body tenses, both from shock and how intimately his hands run against you.
He gives a coy chuckle, raising his voice to ensure Alastor hears him, “Come see me tomorrow. Alone. We can speak further on how you can repay me for helping you.” with a flick of his wrist his cane flies into his hand. You flinch as he presses a kiss to your cheek before disappearing behind his red ribbons.
Alastor remains frozen, kneeling in the middle of the room. His eyes stare into you while flickering between red and black dials. You can’t tell if he’s about to explode or break down. Although a hundred questions are running through your mind, you know better than to poke an already agitated bear or in this case, deer.
In a moment where you should be angry or confused, where you should yell and scream, you instead do something that takes both yourself and Alastor by surprise. Ignoring the pain and soreness in your body, you drop to your knees in front of him and throw your arms around his neck in a tight hug. He moves his hands up but hesitates before touching you. “Wha-what are you doing?” he asks with a mixture of confusion and intrigue.
Within an instant, a plan forms in your head. This is going to get messy. But it’s the only way to protect me…and protect us. R̶͚̀u̷͍̿l̷̦͛ȅ̸̥ ̸͔̀#̷͇̿4̶̫͝ ̴̧̌Ț̶̈ù̷̫r̸͓̃ǹ̷̩ ̸̘̚y̴͔͊ò̵͜u̸͙͝r̸͜͠ ̶́͜w̸̮̉ẻ̴͚á̵͚k̶͎͌n̵̘͛e̶̪͐s̵̜͝s̵̛̤ ̸̼̋ĩ̸̭n̴̘̈t̷͙̎o̴̡̓ ̵̩͌ŝ̷͉t̴̺̊r̴͈̍e̶̡̔n̷̝̓g̶̭̚t̴̺̓h̸̩̓
You pull him closer and run a hand up into his hair, caressing the back of his head, “You already know the questions I have and I fully expect answers. However, at this moment, I only need to know one thing…” you move away to rest his head in your hands, forcing his crimson stare to you, “...if I help you to break your deal, are you willing to keep your chains and bind your soul to me?” Your tone is serious but affectionate. He needs to know I’m not asking from a place of selfishness. Ȓ̸̤u̷̞͗l̶̫͂e̸̛̩ ̴̬͝#̴̼̒3̶̙͝ ̷̣͂K̵̜̓e̴̘̽ë̶̤́p̸̳͑ ̷̣͘t̷̥͆ẖ̸͐o̶͉̐s̷͗͜e̷̛̻ ̵̪̍y̴͎͗ǒ̴͎u̵͘ͅ ̸͇́ĺ̵̮ö̴̧v̴̩̏ę̷̀ ̷̝̋c̸͠ͅl̶̫͑o̸͈͆s̴̟͠ë̵̢́
“Yes.” he says without hesitation. His immediate response takes you aback. The last thing you expected was the ‘all powerful’ Radio Demon to give into your request without a second thought. For a moment you are left completely speechless.
Unassured by your lack of response, Alastor places his hands over yours, “You’ve already managed to obtain my heart and my mind. The second my deal is broken, I will give you my soul. I will give you everything.” Your heart flutters at his words.
There isn’t a single hint of anger or regret in his voice. His eyes lock to yours as he peppers kisses into your palm and down your wrist. The image takes you back to the first night you spent with him just months prior. That night he looked hungry and desperate but now there’s nothing but devotion, a silent plea for your trust.
You can’t fight the heat rising in your face from his affection. He always has a way of clearing your mind yet clouding it all at once. You’d be surprised if he couldn’t hear the pounding of your heart from his willingness to give everything to you. Well phase one of this plan is already going swimmingly. He cocks an eyebrow at how smug you suddenly look, reading you like an open book, “What schemes are you concocting behind those eyes?”
You lightly peck his forehead, then his nose, stopping just above his lips. A sly grin spreads across your face, “I have a plan but you’re not going to like it.” He rolls his eyes and groans, “It involves Lucifer, doesn’t it?”
He helps you to your feet and pulls you into him. Your hands rest perfectly against his broad chest as you smile up at him without an answer. His eyes close with a deep sigh, “My dear, I already do not like where I think this is going.” he mumbles, knowing you’ve already made up your mind.
You stand on your toes to give him a quick playful kiss, “I believe it’s time for me to go make a deal with the Devil.” R̸̢̉u̷͙̔l̷̺̇e̴̡͌ ̷̢̿#̶̠̍2̷͊͜ ̵̤̕D̷̦̐o̴̞̒n̷̠̈́’̷͔̆t̵̪̀ ̴̬̊b̸̺͋ẽ̶͈ ̴̣͘a̴͚͋f̶͔͗ṙ̶͔a̵̻̕i̸̪̾d̵̲̂ ̸̙͗t̷̛̥o̸͕̐ ̸̟͊s̵̖̒h̸͔̊ö̷͇́ẃ̶ͅ ̷̯̓y̸̭̔o̸̮͆u̴̠͐r̷͙͝ ̶͚͝p̵͔͌ǫ̷̛w̵͔͝ė̶̝r̴͎̂
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Silent Love: Ch. 5 - "Good Guy."
⊹ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐ Chapter Four
Previous Chapter: Project Week
Chapter One: New Roommate(s)
Master-List: Here!
.・゜゜・ 。・゚゚・ ╰┈➤ Sukuna x Reader
⁎̩͙ ⁑̩͙̩͙ ⁂̩̩͙͙ Sypnosis:
When moving out of your dorm and leaving your eccentric roommate goes to shit, you're offered by one of her friends to move in with him... for free! That is, if you don't mind living with two completely opposite college boys.
However, life isn't that easy, and there's a hot asshole around the corner to piss you off. Especially when he's always up late at night when you're studying, purposely trying to get on your nerves in the most perverse way possible.
You hate him.
⁎̩͙ ⁑̩͙̩͙ ⁂̩̩͙͙ Genre:
College/Modern World AU. Multiple parts.
Shameless Smut, Thin Walls, Mildly Dubious Consent, Roommates Fluff and Crack, Slice of Life, Kinda Slow Burn, Oral Sex Vaginal Sex, Slight Age Difference, Degradation Fake/Pretend Relationship, Dirty Talk, Dirty Thoughts, Enemies to Lovers, Spit Kink, Angst, Hurt/Comfort.
⁎̩͙ ⁑̩͙̩͙ ⁂̩̩͙͙ Word Count: 10,040
・ 。゚☆: *・ November 27th, 2023 ☽ .* :☆゚.
Monday
The weekend was… tense.
That pissed you off.
It still pisses you off.
You’re still hurt, too.
Yuuji notices, he has yet to ask, but knowing that you came home upset with Sukuna after being happy the whole day with him, he has a feeling he knows the reason. “Do you want to watch this movie?” Yuuji asks, looking over his shoulder.
You take your eyes off the computer, looking at the TV. “No, that one looks sad.” You look back at your screen, “Can you play a comedy, or something?” You jump up at a thought for a moment, “Oh, wait, I know what, play the movie Selena.”
Yuuji tilts his head, “Selena?” He turns back to the TV, searching up the name on Netflix.
You nod, “Mhm, Selena, I have a feeling you’re going to like her.” You continue typing away at the computer while glancing at your notebook. You’re content with all the information you gathered during the week, however, you don’t know how to go about Sukuna’s “Mental Evaluation.”
Now that the two of you aren’t talking–aren’t even looking at each other–it feels wrong to write about him, more a less do your project on him. You sigh, dropping your head on your keyboard, “I hate this project, and I hate Gojo.”
Yuuji doesn’t respond, already sucked into the movie. Which is what you expected, Selena has that effect on people, even in her young age of childhood. You can’t imagine how Yuuji’s going to react when he finally sees her grown and a singer.
You shiver, the window no longer flooding the sun’s light, “Yuuji, I’m cold.” You whisper.
Yuuji waves his hand, “I have some extra blankets in my room, you can grab one–oh! There’s also some snacks in there, too. Bring them so we can watch the movie.” He starts to stand up, “I can help you find them–”
“No, it’s okay.” You put your hand out, stopping him while you stand up. “You enjoy the movie, I’ve seen it a million times with my mom. I practically have it memorized by now.” Yuuji nods, while you make your way to his room.
For a moment you pause and look at Sukuna’s door. It’s the same it’s been this whole weekend, closed and silent. It makes your stomach turn. You want to knock, you want to give Sukuna the benefit of the doubt, you really do, but you can’t. A part of you wishes you could go back in time and listen to what he had to say when he called your name on Friday, but you’re scared–no, you're terrified.
You want to know if he was going to apologize. Yet, another part of you knows that isn’t the case. And that is what scares you. You care for Sukuna, you lik–you shake your head–the idea of him rejecting you, or using you is terrifying.
What if he just tells you to leave him alone? You can’t bear to hear that again. You can’t bear to be a girl he forgets about. It’s so stupid. You’re being so stupid, you genuinely hate it.
You bite the corner of your bottom lip, pushing Yuuji’s door open and flicking on the switch. Only to quickly realize, it doesn't work, to be honest, you’re not entirely surprised by that, you were expecting much worse. Even when you open his closet and grab the snacks and blanket, you were expecting his unopened lego box collection to fall on you, luckily, it didn’t.
You wrap yourself with the blanket, and hold the snacks between your arms, “Yuuji, I think I found all of the snacks.” You yell from his room, closing the door behind you, “Your lego sets almost killed me, but–” You feel your stomach drop, your words dying. Your fingers almost go slack, but you catch yourself, tightening your grasp on the snacks in exchange.
Sukuna pressing his lips together, his eyes moving up and down your frame, before naturally looking at the women besides him. He can see your expression sour from the corner of his eye, and it makes his stomach turn uncomfortably.
The blonde woman laughs, “Oh, hi, baby. It’s been a hot second, huh?” She gives you a satisfied smile, her hands hanging on her hips, “Interesting look you got going there.” She points at you, her finger moving up and down your outfit.
It feels weird… knowing that he’s looking at you after actively avoiding you the whole weekend, and refusing to even breathe in your direction. You give both of them an uncomfortable look, “I’m home? What do you expect me to look like?” You want to move past them, you really do, but that feels embarrassing and uncomfortable. Besides… you’ve made a point to only wear your cute pajamas now that you live with two guys.
She wrinkles her nose, “Who knows.” She turns to Sukuna’s door, pushing it open with confidence. “Something that looks even a bit cute.” She enters the room with a happy skip, leaving you and Sukuna alone in the hall.
You look to the side, a bit of a hurt expression gracing your face.
Sukuna mindlessly mirrors your body language, but keeps his eyes on you. He’s observing you, looking at the snacks in your hands, along Yuuji’s thick blanket wrapped around your shoulder. He can hear his little brother watching a movie in the living room, a part of him wonders if it’s a movie night. Another part of his wonders if he can–
“Can you move?” Your eyes are still looking away from him, your fingers tight around the bags of snacks, you can hear them crinkle underneath your fingers. “Yuuji’s waiting for me.”
Sukuna bites the inside of his cheek, nodding. He pushes himself to the wall, watching as you pass him. He can smell you shampoo and perfume, he can also see the way your eyes look a bit glossy. But, he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t know what to say, and most importantly, he doesn’t want to say anything.
You bite your bottom lip the moment you enter the living room, quickly wiping your eyes as you move behind Yuuji. Hugging him from behind while the blanket engulfs both of you. You close your eyes, sighing into his trapezius, completely relaxing into his body. You’re a bit surprised he can hold up your whole weight without even flinching.
Yuuji keeps his attention to the screen while asking, “You okay?” You nod into his shirt, letting your arms drape over his shoulder as you hold him close. He just nods, leaning into you and taking one of the snacks you took from his room.
You open your mouth, your eyes blurring and turning glossy again as Yuuji pops a chip into your mouth.Stupid Sukuna. Why is liking you so fucking hard?
“I think I’m in love.” Yuuji mindlessly mumbles.
You laugh a tiny bit, moving away from him and back to your computer. “Don’t worry, I was too.” You’re back to typing away, stealing glances at the TV, but mostly Yuuji. Drinking up all his reactions to the movie. “Hate the way it feels, though.”
“I invited Nobara and Megumi.” He tells you randomly, looking at you with glossy eyes. “I’m sorry, but this movie is too good to watch alone.” He wipes his eyes with the back of his hands, “I also told them to bring pizza and tissues.” He smiles to himself, “Also those delicious cheese sticks from Claim Jumpers.”
You smile, happy Yuuji can give you some semblance of a break. If anything, you’re more than grateful you’ve met Yuuji. Of course, technically, he is the one who brought you into this mess, but is the same one who manages to make everything feel better.
You nod into him, “Great call, babe.”
—
Megumi’s eye twitches, “What the hell is going on?” He’s looking at you like you're the reason. Which… you are, but he’s not supposed to automatically assume that. “Why is Yuuji crying…? Again?” Megumi places his hand over his eyes, and you swear you can hear him whisper, ‘Why is he always crying?’
You sheepishly play with the end of your shirt, “I introduced him to Selena, and this is the first time he’s seeing the movie.” You scratch your cheek, glancing back to Yuuji with a worried expression, “Uh, I didn’t expect it to affect him… this much.”
Megumi furrows his eyebrows, his eyes twitching for a moment, “Oh…” He places the pizza on the dining room table, along with passing Yuuji the box of tissues. “I thought he was joking, but…” He’s giving Yuuji and uncomfortable look.
Nobara looks at the screen, shaking her head. “Ah, no, it’s Selena. Completely reasonable.” She pops open the pizza box, picking a silence. “Cried my eyes out the first time she showed me this movie.” She bites the pizza with a distant expression, mumbling, “Memories.”
You grab a slice too, “I did, too. I just thought Yuuji would absolutely love Selena.” You glance at him, watching as he’s absolutely engrossed in the movie, you laugh a bit before grabbing a napkin and sitting down next to him, lifting the pizza to his mouth so he can take a bite. “Besides, this is supposed to be sad.”
Megumi looks at the screen, “The music is nice.”
“How can you listen to this song and not cry?” Nobara adds, however, she's eyeing you and Yuuji. “Dreaming of you," is a certified cry song. Something you listen to when your heart is breaking, you need a good cry, or just need a good song to listen to.”
You nod feverishly, agreeing with Nobara. Passing Yuuji another bite of his pizza. “Nobara gets it, Megumi, we just need to convert you now.”
“Hard pass.” He sits down at the table, scrolling through his phone.
You laugh.
“You and Yuuji seem close.” Nobara sits down next to you with a smile, “Something happened during the week you’ve been here?” She wiggles her shoulder suggestively, passing you a look you can’t help but roll your eyes at.
But, it’s quickly replaced with shock when her words settle in your mind, “It’s only been a week?!” There’s actually no way. “Oh my god, please say you’re lying.”
“It hasn’t.” Megumi shakes his head, which gives you some form of relief, before he quickly adds, “More like two.” For some reason, that makes it even worse.
You’re almost spiraling at that, how the hell has it only been two weeks?! You blink a few times, “Uh, that’s amazing…” You let Yuuji take another bite of the food, “I genuinely don’t think that I’m going to make it till the end of finals.”
Nobara leans her head on your shoulder, but a small worried look graces her face. “Hey, are you okay?” She examines your face, noticing the bags and dreariness in your eyes. “You look rough. Mostly tired.” Then, she gasps like a madwoman, her eyes growing with excitement. “Wait, don’t tell me! You and Suk–”
“I won’t tell you.” You cut her off, taking an aggressive bite into the pizza. Only to remember that the pizza isn’t yours, it’s Yuuji, and you internally scold yourself. You look at Yuuji, then Megumi, then back at Nobara, whispering, “At least, not right now…”
This makes Nobara light up, “Oh my gosh, I can’t wait!” She whispers back excitedly, jumping up slightly. She grabs your shoulders, wiggling you, “I’m actually so jealous, I can’t believe you actually—“
“Stop assuming things.” You whisper aggressively, narrowing your eyes, “I’ll tell you later.” You pout, looking at the screen with furrowed eyebrows. “That’s if I still like you by them.” You mumble.
“I’m totally sleeping over.” Nobara says with a smirk, letting her head fall on your nape, “Girls night, you need to fill me in on all the shit the two of you did together.”
Yuuji passes you a questionable look, which makes you groan, pushing her away and mumbling, “Shut up.” Yet, Nobara is quick at your side again.
“Did you bring the cheese sticks?” Yuuji asks, looking at Megumi, he cocks his head in your direction, “We’ve been waiting patiently for them.”
You swear you imagined it, but you swear that you can see Megumi's subtle smile. Looking down at his feet while he bites the side of his cheek, a small huff of air leaving his nose. His voice comes in shaky as he says, “C-Cheese sticks?”
Nobara burst into a fit of laughter, falling on her back while she points and laughs at the two of you. You give her a questionable look, confused on her amusement, “What? What’s so funny?” You look at Yuuji for support, only to see his equally confused expression, “We literally just want our cheese sticks.”
Nobara’s laughter grows more frantic, while Megumi’s subtle smile turns into a full on laugh.
Yuuji raises an eyebrow, tilting his head to the side, you mimic his actions. “What? They’re good?” He says quietly, confused on what could possibly be so funny.
Nobara points at Yuuji, trying to collect herself as she forces out, “W-Wait, you call them cheese sticks?” She wipes her eyes.
Yuuji’s eyebrows furrow, absolutely confused. “Yeah? What… what else would they be called?” He laughs awkwardly, passing the two of them an unsure smile.
Nobara looks at you for a second, laughing lightly. “Yuuji, babe, love of my life. Man I will marry, and love for the rest of my days. Pray that one day I will die hand to hand with.” She hugs him, pushing you out of the way. “They’re called mozzarella sticks.” She whispers.
Yuuji shakes his head, “Yeah, no. They’re not.” He looks at Megumi, desperately in your opinion, “Megumi, tell her. They’re cheese sticks, right?” There’s a bit of uneasiness in his voice, almost shaky.
Megumi slowly looks to the side, taking a bite of his pizza. “Yuuji…” He softly starts, keeping his composure, “I could’ve sworn we talked about this a little while ago, and..”
Yuuji shakes his head, “Don’t tell me.”
Megumi nods, “I’m sorry to tell you… again.”
“I feel sick.” He grabs your shirt, calling your name desperately, “Be here for me, be on my side, what are they called…?” You swear you can see some tears pearling in his waterline.
“Uh..” You pass an unsure glance at Nobara, “Are they really called mozzarella sticks?” Your question is just as uneasy as Yuuji is right now, and you think rightfully so. Was your whole childhood a lie?
Nobara gives you a somber look, looking down and closing her eyes. Almost as if you told her your favorite celebrity had finally gotten into a relationship with someone. “I’m… not sorry.”
Yuuji hunches over, grabbing his stomach. “Wow…” He whispers, “I feel like my life has changed.” He shakes his head, grabbing his mouth, “And, not for the better…” You pat his back accordingly, this is just as equally as a tragedy to you, as it is to Yuuji.
“So, every time I’ve gone to Claim Jumpers with you guys and asked for cheese sticks, the waiters just?... never corrected me?” Yuuji looks absolutely shocked, passing you a glance, “So, yesterday when we ordered some, we must’ve looked like dumbasses.”
You let out a breath of disbelief, “What the hell…?”
Nobara plots herself on the couch, letting out a satisfied sigh, “I can’t believe you idiots thought they’re called cheese sticks.” She waves her hand cockily, “If you guys look like idiots, obviously the two of you are.”
Yuuji narrows his eyes at her, “Did you even bring them?”
Nobara loudly laughs, “No.”
—
“So, tell me babe.” Nobara slides the shirt you lended to her over her head, then jumps on your bed. “What’s going on between you two? Friends with benefits, situationship, maybe even secretly dating?” She smirks to herself, whispering, “Secretly dating…” One more time for good measure.
You kick your lounge shorts to the side, bending down and grabbing some sleeping pants to keep warm, “None of that, Nobara.” You push your hair over your shoulder, “You and your imagination, I swear.”
“Not true, I’m just trying to get the juicy details.” She gives you an annoyed look, pointing at your body, “I’m sorry, but with how hot you are and how unfairly hot Sukuna is, there had to be so much sexual tension, I’m so upset I couldn’t have seen it.”
“Nobara!” You say, a bit louder than you would’ve liked. “I don’t like him right now, and you’re making it really hard for me to take you seriously.” Your face is burning up, her implications slowly starting to get to you.
“Yeah, sure, honey.” Nobara places her hand over her lips to hide her catty smile, looking to the side and singing, “I’m sure you “hate” him.” She uses her free hand to make a lewd motion that looks similar to intimately shaking a soda bottle.
You feel your eyes twitch, your face burning up even more. “Oh my god. I’m goin–I hope you kill yourself.” You place your face in your hands, shaking your head, “No. I’m going to kill myself, I swear…”
She laughs, leaning back in your bed and picks up the stuffed bunny she gave you long ago. “You love me so much, I know, I know.” Yet, her face falls a bit, “Okay, but, seriously. Are you okay? You look… tired. More so than normal.”
You press your lips together, moving to your vanity and sitting down in front of the mirror. Pulling at the bottom of your eyes, “Yes.” You shrug, “I don’t know, but…” You sigh, already knowing Nobara is going to absolutely lose her mind, “The whole week was–” You shake your head, just pull off the bandaid, “We did something on Friday at the party.”
Nobara blinks a few times, before screaming into the bunny excitedly, “No way! No way! Yes, way!” She wiggles her shoulders, hugging the bunny, “You have to tell me everything that happened, did you suck him out?” She loudly gasps, “Did he suck you off? Or… eat you out?”
“No!” You yell at her, throwing a lipliner at her head. Which she dodges with ease, you turn back to the mirror, “Oh my god, can you like not for five seconds?”
Nobara gives you an exasperated look, “What? I’m sorry but, can you blame me?” She taps her chest, “You’ve never done anything with anyone, you can’t be mad because I’m excited for you.” She does sound excited, but you wish it was directed somewhere else right now.
You grab a wet wipe, removing your makeup, “I know and I would be too, if it wasn’t for–” You falter, your hand pausing, “Right before I…” You feel your face heat up, “When I was close to finishing, he–”
Nobara tilts her head, sitting up in your bed and looking at you through the mirror. “Close to finishing? He was getting you off?” She smiles a bit, “Babe, you can’t throw these hot single lines at me and not tell me the juicy details.”
“..Yes, he was… you know.” You let your eyes move to the side, “We were doing stuff at a party… in a laundry room, while my clothes were getting washed.”
Nobara gawks at this, “Oh my god… I’m so jealous.” She shakes her head, “Okay, I’m sorry, actually continue now.”
You continue whipping your eyes, “Remember how I told you about our deal? About how we’d only be friends for like a week for the project, then just kind of forget about each other?” You press your lips together.
Nobara looks to the side in thought, “Maybe, I don’t–just tell me what happened?”
“He threw it in my face while we were doing that.” You bite your bottom lip, “Told me he was happy I finally gave in before the week was over.” You toss the makeup wipe on your desk, pushing yourself away from the vanity. “I just–I like him, Nobara, and I know I shouldn’t, but I do. And, I thought he liked me too, he was starting to be… human, but I guess not…”
Nobara wraps her arms around you, “Oh, babe, I’m so sorry.” She rubs your back, pulling away while her hands stay on your shoulders, “I genuinely feel so shitty now, I really didn’t know. You don’t deserve that.”
“You were distracted by his hot face.” You give her a small smile, but there’s some pain littered through it. “I don’t blame you, I was too.”
Nobara laughs for a moment, “I get it, my asshole has a hot face, too.” She leans close, her cheek touching yours, “He also knows how to use his hands.”
“Tell me about it.” You pull her on your bed, pulling the thick blanket over your heads. Creating a small fort of sorts. “And now he’s in his room with the girl he told me he blocked.” You think for a moment, “Actually, it’s the girl he blocked twice, one of them then he told me to do.”
Nobara makes a face, it’s a bit smug, “Okay, I know we hate him right now, but like…?” She lifts her hands, moving them up and down as if she were balancing something. “Ate…” She laughs a bit, “Devoured… I fear.”
You place your hand over your mouth, shouting a small, “I know.” Before shaking your head, “Okay, stop, I’m supposed to hate him right now.” You look to the side, “But, yeah, I totally ate that shit up. He could’ve asked me to strip and I probably would’ve done it.” You shake your head, “Back on topic. Hate him, we hate him.”
“Back to hating him.” Nobara says completely seriously. Creating an ‘x’ with her hands. “He’s not even that hot.”
You nod in agreement, before thinking, “Well… let’s not be crazy here.”
Nobara sighs, “I know..” She says a bit disappointed, “I thought lying to ourselves would make us feel better, but I’m afraid I feel the same.” You nod in agreement.
Your eyes light up, remember something, “By the way, I hope you brought some headphones.” You reach for yours, wiggling them in the air.
Nobara gives you a questionable look, before slowly saying, “Why?” She takes them from you, allowing her fingers to run over the cold metal. They’re heavy, and feel really nice. She puts them on, and instantly notices their sound proof.
That makes her stomach turn a bit.
You pull them off her head, letting them fall into your lap. “Haven’t I told you what happened on my first day here?” You tap your bottom lip, thinking for a moment, “I could’ve sworn I did…”
“You probably did.” She falls back on your bed, getting comfortable in your soft sheets. “Sometimes I just stop listening, you tend to yap a lot.” She cattily smirks, closing her eyes completely pleased with herself.
“I will make you sleep with Yuuji tonight, Nobara. Don’t test me.” You deadpan, grabbing a pillow and slapping it over her face. She dramatically puts one of her hands in the air. You smile at this, “I know you’re not going to be happy with how loud he snores.”
“No! Not again, I’ve been hit!” She laughs into the pillow, “Oh, but please do. I’m sure adding more blackmail into my Yuuji collection will make me happy.” She pulls the pillow away from her face, tapping your cheek. “There’s no winning for you here, babe.”
You slap her hand away from your face, “I hate you.”
・ 。゚☆: *・ November 28th, 2023 ☽ .* :☆゚.
Tuesday
Eating breakfast with Yuuji is an activity you didn’t think you would miss, until right now.
Yuuji hands you a paper towel, “Now, watch me.” He places the paper towel over the bowl, covering the flakes underneath the towel. “Watch carefully.” He whispers, now placing his palm over the towel and applying pressure to it, crushing the flakes underneath his palm.
“Why are we–how does this enhance the eating experience, Yuuji?” You mimic his actions, feeling the flakes awkwardly poke and prod at your skin under the pressure.
“Trust me, I’ve done this since I’ve gained consciousness.” Yuuji reassures, peeling off the paper towel and looking at the now small flakes, then nodding to himself in approval. “Perfect, now we can add the milk.
You remove your towel and allow Yuuji to pour in the milk, swirling your spoon in the food. “Okay, and I’m allowed to eat it now, right?” You narrow your eyes at him suspiciously, “You won’t throw out my food again, right?”
Yuuji sighs, taking a bite of the cereal while mumbling, “Don’t patronize me.”
You follow suit, taking a bite of the food and humming with satisfaction. “Yuuji…” You begin, chewing your food slowly to build suspense. Placing your finger in a curve above your lips.
Yuuji’s eyes light up with excitement, nodding his head excitedly, “Yeah!”
You nod a few more times, taking another spoonful and chewing slowly. “Yes, I see.” You look him dead in the eye, “It’s… exactly the same.” That’s not a complete lie, but you can admit it’s more fun to eat now. Less poky and hard.
Yuuji collapses on the floor, crumbling to his knees. “You kill me a little every single day.” He sticks his tongue out, a small ‘bleh!’ leaving his mouth, “If I die at the ripe age of forty, I’m blaming you.”
You laugh, patting his head while you continue to eat your food. “It’s okay Yuuji, I’ll probably be in my death bed right next to you.” You quickly finish your meal, placing it in the sink while lowering Yuuji’s bowl to his height. Allowing him to take it from your hands and continue his food.
“I’m going to be getting ready.” You pat his head again, a part of you tempted to kiss his head, but you suffice with the head pat. “You enjoy your food, babe, I’ll be getting changed.” You start to walk to your room, before pausing for a moment, “Also, I’m not going to my classes today.”
Yuuji stuffs his face with food, while his eyebrows pull together in a worried expression. “What, why?” He stands up, shoving his plate in the sink. “Are you not feeling well? Or, did something else happen?” He’s worried, which is endearing.
“No, I’m okay.” You reassure him, and continue to your room with Yuuji behind you. “I just have some work to catch up on, and some other stuff happening.” You wave your hand dismissively, “Some family stuff I need to work out with my parents.”
Yuuji pouts, “Oh, I hope everything works out, then…” He scratches the back of his neck, his cheeks tinting in red ever so slight, “If… if you have anything you want to talk about, I know Nobara is your best friend and all, but you can talk to me, too.”
You stop, looking at him from your shoulder with a bit of a dumbfounded look, before a smile builds on your lips. Immediately turning on your heel and hugging him, arms snuggly around his torso. “Don’t worry, Yuuji, it’s nothing bad.” You squeeze him a bit tighter, then pull away while smiling at him. “And, thank you.” You tilt your head, “I hope you can also come to me with any problems you might have.”
Yuuji smiles at that, nodding eagerly. “I promise I will!”
“You make it sound like you’re going to look for a reason to cry in my arms now.” You move to your door, pushing it open with a small huff.
“Maybe, I am.” Yuuji grabs his red converse and sits down on the floor to put them on, “Uhg! Ouh!...” He groans, placing his fist against his chest as if he stabbed himself, “I think I’ve been stabbed, or worse…” He lets his head fall, “I think my childhood trauma is coming back again.”
You laugh, moving from your door and hugging his head, pulling it into your chest. “Awh, my poor poor baby, it’s okay.” You tap his head, kissing his hair. “It’s okay, it’s okay, I’m here.”
Yuuji lets his hands fall slack to his sides, you can feel his lashes blinking, tickling your skin slightly. “I…” He slowly starts, a bit unsure, “Uh, I don’t know if I weirdly like this, or really, really hate it.”
You loudly laugh, finally standing back up, “Maybe, you’re touched deprived.” You enter your room, “It’s okay if you are, Yuuji, we all are.” You glance at your room, the clock on your drawer catching your attention. It makes you loudly gasp, “Wait, Yuuji, it’s almost time for the bus to be here!”
Yuuji panics, shoving his shoes on while not bothering to tie the laces. “Oh crap! I completely forgot about the time!” He pushes himself on his feet, running into his room and grabbing his bag, sloppily throwing it over his shoulders.
You giggle a bit, pushing yourself on the hallway wall and letting him pass you, “Have a good day Yuuji, I’ll wait for you to come back.” You kindly wave goodbye, but it’s not returned, which you don’t dwindle too much on.
You move to your room, picking out an outfit which was somewhat suitable for a nice day in, while being equally as comfortable. Some black yoga pants, with some white socks and matching leg warmers, along with an oversized gray sweatshirt.
You’re quick to grab your computer, opening it up only to get an unfavorable reminder of the unfinished project you have yet to complete. It’s definitely… close to being complete, but close in the sense of; You feel like it’s only a few more paragraphs, but the moment you start writing you realize how much more you have to add before it’s actually done.
Whatever, you have the whole day to try and complete it.
You open your contacts, click your father’s name for a facetime and hold your breath until he picks up. You’re immediately greeted by his forehead when he does answer, which makes you stifle a small laugh.
“Hi, dad.” You whisper, waving politely as you scoot back and lean on your bed, your computer propped on the small coffee table, “You need to bring the phone back more, so I can see you.” You say with a small laugh.
“Oh.” He extends his arm all the way, letting you see the room he’s in and a good chunk of his body. “Is that better?”
You laugh, nodding your head, “Mhm, it’s perfect.” You grab a blanket, wrapping it around your shoulders, “You can set up the phone on something, that way you don’t have to hold it.” You point at the desk behind him, “Set it up on your desk.”
You dad nods, setting up the camera–with a few slips–and nodding to himself in pride once it sits comfortably on the light. “I got it, baby, I told you I could do it.” He gives you a cheeky thumbs up, before narrowing his eyes at the phone.
You mimic his actions, before crossing your legs over one another, “Do you like the place? I get free accommodation for this month.” You say with an unsure smile, twisting your computer to let the camera record the whole room.
“Nothing is for free…” He tells you with an unimpressed expression.
“No, I’m very much living here for free.” You push your hair behind your shoulders, “Although, I do have to live with…” You cringe, taking in a deep breath. “I have to live with two brothers…” You awkwardly wait for your father’s reaction, but it doesn’t come. Which makes you feel even worse if he just scolds you.
He thinks for a moment, “Are they making you clean or cook for them? Or worse?” He grabs his chest, “...Are they–are they distracting you from your studies?” He seems extremely distressed by this idea, almost tearing up.
You slap your head, “No, dad, they’re not distracting me from my studies, or making me clean or cook for them.” You lean on the table, resting your cheek on your hand, “You already know I can’t cook for the life of me.”
Your dad thinks again, “Huh, I guess you’re right.” He sighs, “What are we going to do with you?” He stands up, “Here, I’m guessing you want to see your mom, I’ll go get her for you.” He pretends it’s a chore, dragging his feet on the ground, while loudly sighing, before laughing to himself and prancing away.
You giggle, waiting patiently for your mom. When she does, she sits on the chair of the desk, passing you a small wave. Her face is extremely relaxed, drooping a bit.
You wave with a smile, “Hi mom.”
You watch as she lifts her hands, waving back. Her face remains the same, uninteresting and droopy. Paralyzed, and unable to move. But, you know if she could, she would smile back at you.
You feel your bottom lips wobble, before you narrow your eyes at her, “Have you been taking your meds? I know you tend to get off them.” You point your finger at her playfully, “I know you tend to go long without them, too. It’s probably why you can hear colors now.”
She laughs, but it’s more gargled and tiresome, mumbled in an inhuman way, her face remains the same, but her throat contracts with her laughter. She lifts her hands, telling you, “I have been taking them, doctor.”
You nod approvingly, finally looking at her face again, “Good. I don’t want to make a call again.” It’s a bit humorous now, but not three weeks ago when your dad—with full seriousness—screamed at you, ‘She’s off her meds!’ Which… is the situation boiled down to something funny and simple. It unfortunately didn’t feel like that when it happened.
“You are living somewhere new? I heard you said for free.” Your mother tells you, her hands are a bit shaky with age. It’s something you’ve grown used to.
“Yeah, I made a friend and they offered their place to me when the original apartment didn’t work out.” You sigh, waving your hand dismissively, “I’ll tell you all about it when I come for Christmas. It’s a long story.”
Your mom pauses for a moment, and you know, if it weren’t for her paralyzed face, she would be smiling at you right now. It hurts when you think about something in that nature. “Can not wait to hear, baby.”
You nod, a bit of worry falling over your face, “Are you okay? I’m sorry I had to leave so fast, but I couldn’t miss another week of school.” You shake your head, scratching the back of your head. “I’m actually really behind right now, and had to skip today…”
“Naughty girl.” She shakes her head, “I thought I taught you better. But, I’m alright, just a bad episode. Nothing I couldn’t tough through.” She taps her face, looking at it through the call, “Besides, who knew it would be that bad, right?”
You can’t help but feel your chest tighten a small bit, “Yeah…” You lean to the side, trying to find a way to change the conversation. “But, uhm, how has the family been? Anything interesting happened in the few weeks I left?” You pass her a shaky uneven smile.
“Thank you for coming.” Your mother tells you, “I’m sure it was scary to receive that call, I’m sorry I put you through that.” Ever since you were a teen, she developed the ability to read you like an open book.
You pass her an empathetic smile, shaking your head softly, “Don’t worry, I was just freaking out. Besides, I’m always happy to help, it’s why I stayed so long, mom.” You wave your hand reassuringly. “I love you.”
She nods, lifting her hand. She points her pinky up, then, her pointer and thumb. Followed by her pinky and thumb, while she presses the rest of your fingers to her palm. It’s a phrase you’re more used to reading from her, than you are hearing from her. “I love you.”
It makes your chest squeeze, your eyes glossing over just a bit.
The rest of the conversation is brief, saying a quick hi to your sibling, and telling a few details about your academic life. Mentioning a few names such as Yuuji, Megumi, Nobara, and–of course–Sukuna. Of which she picks up on an unsure eyebrow quirk.
She is all over that. All of which you shut down immediately. Well, not immediately… or very firmly. But, enough to where she’s sufficing with a small head nod.
Even when the end calls, you’re still reeling in slight embarrassment, cupping your face as you try to calm down. Curse, Sukuna. He can go away forever. Speaking of Sukuna, you really need to give that project more of your attention.
You instinctively reach for your phone, for the video message recorded on it, only to remember, “Shit, I left it in the kitchen.” You open your door, moving to the kitchen. You can hear a muffled conversation, which you don’t think much of–unfortunately–in favor of your cellular device.
You falter for a moment when your eyes land on the couple standing at the front door. Sukuna’s back is to you, leaning on the door frame, while the blonde woman is talking to him with a sweet smile. An airy laughing while occasionally pushing his shoulder, chest, or arm
You instantly want to turn back, come back to retrieve your phone in a few minutes, but before you can do that, you and the blonde woman lock eyes. Her sentence or obnoxious laugh–you can’t tell what the difference is–coming to a quick pause.
She waves, grabbing Sukuna’s arm while saying, “Awh, look! It’s your little roomie.” She smiles, when Sukuna finally turns to look at you, “You should probably spend some time with her, I know she’s jealous since I have your attention.”
You glare at her, hate and spite brewing in your head, venom to spite back at her bubbling your throat and burning to be let loose. But, you compose yourself, passing her a simple eye roll and walking to the kitchen to retrieve your phone.
“Damn, looks like she’s scared of me.” She whines, “Looks like you aren’t his favorite anymore, huh?” She sings, tilting her head to the side, to peer at you from the door frame. “Don’t worry, I completely understand, I would be upset if I wasn’t his favorite toy anymore–”
“You’re ugly, and your sexy face is absolutely horrendous.” You tuck your phone into your yoga pocket, “I would know, I saw the picture.” You loosely point at Sukuna, “In fact, we laughed at you. Then, he told me to block you, for the second time.” You blink a few times, “Babe, we both know you’re not even a toy to Sukuna, you’re just a fly.”
She blinks a few times, her eyes moving to Sukuna in some form of support, only to see it not given to her. It’s just a side profile of Sukuna looking at you while he bites the inside of his cheek. Is the fucker trying not to laugh at her?! She scoffs, turning on her heel and leaving the house. Slamming the door behind her.
You’re upset, and Sukuna can see that.
“You know, some support would’ve been nice?” You whisper, but your voice grows with spite as you add, “Defending myself is fucking embarrassing. Especially when you’re fucking her while I’m in the same house as you.” You go to the kitchen to grab your phone, tucking it into your pocket once you finally get it in your hands.
Sukuna doesn’t say anything, “Things aren’t lik–”
You shake your head, “I don’t want to hear it.” You wave him off, making your way back to your room. “You’re clearly too caught up in old nasty habits to be talked to.” You huff, instantly hugging yourself for some weird form of comfort.
Sukuna’s eye twitches, and something inside him snaps at your words. He doesn’t know why, but it sets him off, all the weird and unknown emotions from the weekend bubbling up and spitting venom at you. “What the fuck is your problem?!” Sukuna barks at you, moving after you with heavy footsteps.
You instantly turn on your heel, making him stop dead in his tracks while you point at his face. “Don’t you even start with that! Don’t give me the innocent, ‘I did absolutely nothing!’ Bullshit, because you did. You know exactly what you did!” Suddenly, it feels like the stresses from the past weeks you’ve been through are boiling up and spitting out.
Sukuna takes a few steps back while shoving his head into his sweat pockets. “Sure, tell me then? What did I do?” He glares at you, passing you an annoyed eye roll. “What did I do to you that was possibly so fuckin’ bad?”
You scoff at this, rolling your eyes as you turn your head away from him. “Oh please, I know you’re not stupid, Sukuna. Why don’t you piece together the puzzle for me?” You wrinkle your nose, pinching the bridge of it.
“What? You’re going to be like every other girl and throw the ‘I was using you,’ excuse at me? God, that shit is so fuckin’ annoying.” He rolls his eyes, waving you off. “You’re acting like you’re so innocent and perfect, too pretty and sweet to ever hurt anyone.”
You blink a disbelief, “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
Sukuna laughs at you, “Oh, as if you don’t know.” He pulls his hands out his pockets, sitting on the ledge of the couch. “You’re worse than me.” He looks away from you, licking his teeth, “I’ve seen the way you hang off Yuuji. Toying and touching his body. Then, follow me around with hearts in your eyes.”
You scowl at him, “Are you kidding me?!” You slap your hands over your eyes, “I already told you me and Yuuji are just friends. How many times do I need to drill that into your head?!”
Sukuna scoffs at that, “Right, and you’re telling me Yuuji knows that? That he’s just letting you do these things to him. Letting you get close and show him love without anything else behind it?”
You can see where he's coming from, but you’re too pissed to care. You’re not looking at him, “Oh my god, what is this even about? I’ve already told you, no, I’m just his friend. I care about Yuuji, and I don’t want to do anything with him.” You explain, a bit desperately. “He is more than aware of that.” Yuuji knows I like you.
“Right, you’re just so helpful. Never hurting anyone by saying or doing anything that could hurt them.” Sukuna rubs his face exasperated, “I swear, you’re just like everyone else–”
This makes you follow him into the living room, “I can’t believe you’re grouping me with other girls right now, I can’t believe you’re treating me like I’m some other girl you can just–”
“Throw out?” He cuts you off, walking into the living room. Your expression falls at this, your shoulders tensing, while pain dancing between your eyes. Sukuna feeds off this. “Yeah, believe it or not, doll, you’re not that special, a week spent with me isn’t going to give you any sort of special treatment.” He laughs, pointing at the kitchen, “If you want, I can give you a cookie if that’ll make you feel better.”
You feel your eyebrows furrow, your bottom lip quivering ever so slightly. “Why is it wrong with you? Why are you acting like this? It feels like you’re trying to hurt me right now.” You gesture at him, “I swear, you’re acting like you don’t know me.”
“Because, I don’t. You don’t know me, I don’t know you, this is what we agreed on.” Sukuna throws his hands in the air annoyedly.
“Stop saying that!” You can feel your eyes glaze over a bit, which makes you turn your back to him and move to the dining room table. “That whole deal–is fucking bullshit, stop bringing it up. It isn’t helping you right now.”
You can hear Sukuna sigh, rolling his eyes as he says, “Right, completely forgot. How could I forget the amount of times you threw it in my face during the week. Shit, completely my fault.”
You furrow your eyebrows at him, your jaw dropping a bit, “Are you mad at me?” You ask in shock, “Oh my god, wait, do you think you’re the victim here? Do you really think that I’m the bad guy, and you’re somehow–”
“You’re not the good guy.” Sukuna barks back, “Fuck. Why do you think you’re the good person here? You’re just like me–”
“What are we talking about?!” You yell, “I have no idea why you’re mad at me–just tell me what’s wrong, or what I did wrong.” You sigh, leaning your head back slightly with exhaustion, “You can’t throw an argument in my face, when I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
“That makes it worse.” He tells you, a bit more calmly than before, “You have your reason why you’re angry with me, and I have mine.”
“But, you can’t be mad at me over something I’ve never done!” You’re raising your voice again, and you will scold yourself later, but right now your emotions are all over the place. “Just tell me why you’re mad at me.”
Sukuna bites his cheek, looking away with an annoyed expression, “Oh please, I know you’re not stupid, doll, why don’t you piece the puzzle together for me.” Instantly, your words from Thursday bounce in his head, and his chest tightens in pain. Now, this conversation hurts.
It really hurts.
“The stuff you said at the party.” You start, your hands shaking, this conversation is what you’ve been terrified to have. Now, you’re forced to have it with your emotions running wild, and no game plan on how to approach it. “You did stuff with me, knowing you were just going to dump me the next day.”
Sukuna passes you an unreadable expression, “Don’t pretend you didn’t know that, you constantly reminded both of us.” He passes you a cocky smile, “Don't forget, you were the one who literally said you were a burner phone the day before. What else was that supposed to mean? I’m supposed to keep you around after I make the call?”
“Are you seriously saying that since I was used, you didn’t need me anymore?” You’re in disbelief, but more importantly, in so much more pain. “You just want to toss me out?”
It’s silent.
It’s so silent, you can hear your heart beating in your heart. A part of you thinks you can hear Sukuna’s.
Sukuna leans back on the arm rest of the couch, licking his canines as he looks away from you. “What else would burner phone mean?” He’s still not looking at you, but his expression isn’t filled with anger anymore, it looks more… pained. It looks like.. Sukuna is equally as hurt as you. “You said it yourself.” When he says your name to punctuate the sentence, it feels like a weapon stabbing into your chest.
You feel your bottom lips wobble, “No, stop.” You whisper at him, “You knew, and I knew, that wasn’t going to happen. You weren’t just going to pretend nothing happened, the deal was a lie from the moment we made it. We knew this. You knew this.” You finally turn to look at him, finding composure to finally speak. “I know–and you can lie to my face, say you don’t care about me, but I know you do.” It’s scary to say that, knowing he may disagree.
Sukuna stills at this, unsure of what to say, before forcing the words out, “Don’t flatter yourself.” He crosses his arms over his chest, “I swear, it’s like you actually like me.”
You feel your eyes water again, “You’re so!–Ugh.” You twist your head away from him, whipping your eyes with the back of your hand. You absolutely hate that you can’t so much as yell without your eyes watering.
Sukuna laughs, “Wait, don’t tell me…” He tilts his head to the side, trying to look at your face, “You want to be with me, you actually want to be with me?” He laughs again, his hand placed over his face, “That’s so funny. Didn’t I tell you to drop that stupid fuckin’ dream?”
This makes you snap, yelling, “I don’t want to be with you! Why can’t you understand that!” Your chest is hurting, your heart pounding in your chest. You’re lying right now, you’re lying to Sukuna and yourself, why are you lying right now?
Still, the words keep pouring out, “I would never want to be with you–be with someone like you. You’re terrible at communicating, an asshole, full of himself, and a horrible pers–” You slap your hand over your mouth, stopping yourself.
Sukuna clenches his jaw, pushing himself off the couch, “You think so?” He laughs to himself, “You don’t even know how fuckin’ horrible I can get, you want to hurt?” He stands up straight, collecting himself in a way.
It feels like your chest is tearing in pain, a part of you wants to ask, ‘What do you mean?’ But, you don’t have the strength, more or less the willpower to know the answer. What else could Sukuna possibly say to hurt you even more than now? A part of you is thankful he doesn’t finish, it’s a question left in the air, and you’re happy for that. You’re glad he has some power to not say something that will completely tear you apart.
Sukuna sighs, nodding his head to himself, “But, I’m glad we can agree. Who would want to be with someone like you?” He says with a smile, but it’s uneven and shaky, almost wobbly, “So, does this mean you can stop bitching at me? You can finally hop off my dick and leave me the fuck alone.”
You’re breathing shakily, you instantly open your mouth to spit more venom at him, before you stop. Letting silence fill the area, it is heavy, and painful. You can even hear Sukuna’s heavy breathing. “You don’t mean that…” It’s not even a whisper, but you know Sukuna can hear it.
Sukuna doesn’t respond.
You finally feel your tears slide down your cheeks, hot and wet, “What are we even arguing about? Why are we arguing?” You sound tired, your voice is a bit strained and small. “If you want me to leave you alone–not talk to you, why are you arguing with me right now?” You thickly swallow, “You don’t just argue with someone you don’t care for, Sukuna.”
Sukuna still doesn’t look at you, just walks to the kitchen and grabs his keys. “Sure.” He starts walking to the garage. When it clicks what he’s doing, you feel your heart squeeze in pain.
He’s leaving.
More tears slide down your cheeks, “Don’t leave.” You whisper, watching as he walks towards the garage door. “Please, don’t leave me.” You cup your face, trying to hide your tears. “I want to talk, let me talk to you…”
That seems to spark Sukuna, his body freezing mid step. You can see him shaking, his eyes trained on the doorknob. His lips together, his eyes narrowing, he slowly shakes his head. “I can’t.” He whispers, opening the door, then mouthing, ‘I’m sorry.’
When the door closes, you crumble to the floor. Sobbing with a heave as you break down. You wish you could go back in time to the beginning of the previous week, you wish you could take back everything you said, you wish you never agreed to Sukuna’s deal, and you wish… more than everything in this world.
That you didn’t like Sukuna. You wish you didn’t fall apart over a stupid conversation, because he just doesn’t care about you. You wish the argument between the two of you wasn’t as painful as it is.
You wish you could just hug him, and cry into his arms while he consoles you. Whispering, apologizing, and explaining how he feels. You just want to know what he’s feeling, what he thinks… You don’t believe he doesn’t care.
You refuse to.
It hurts too much to believe him.
Little do you know, Sukuna crumbles to his feet with you.
・ 。゚☆: *・ November 14th, 2023 ☽ .* :☆゚.
Wednesday
Class was… it was something. You were distant, bored, and mentally not there. Even Gojo noticed something was wrong with you, but you shrugged him off. Nobara passed him an empathetic look, before quickly following after you.
Even at your club, most of your peers were asking things along the lines of, ‘Are you okay?’ or, ‘Did something happen?’ and, ‘Do you just want to go home?’ maybe, ‘You look rough, president.’ But, it was all in vain, you remained silent the entire time. Keeping your attention on paperwork you had been avoiding up until the point, not bothering to even pass a single word to anyone. You were incredibly quiet the entire day. Even now, on the way home, you’re still incredibly quiet.
You lean on Yuuji’s shoulder, holding his hand as a form of comfort. Sneaking small pieces of his food to snack on. You’re wearing sunglasses, which constantly fall down your nose with each bump from the bus.
Yuuji is resting his head on yours, his eyes on your head. He came home to you in your room, softly sniffling, while your eyes were red and swollen. Yuuji quickly pieced what happened by his brother’s absence and your silent cries. It reminds him too much of himself years ago.
Even when the two of you enter the house, discarding your blocky sunglasses on the counter, your eyes are still puffy, and Sukuna is still gone. Yuuji is quick to make an ice pack, wrapping it with a paper towel and holding it to you. “It can help with swelling.”
You pass him a pathetic smile, but it’s more to the floor than to Yuuji, not only is your vision impaired by your swollen eye, but your vision is literally impaired, and wearing glasses somewhere outside the private space of your room sounds very unappealing.
You take the ice pack and press it to your eyes, leaning on the island counter and sighing. You reach your hand out for Yuuji, which he gives you immediately. “Thanks, Yuuji, this means a lot.” You laugh a little bit, “I feel like your child right now.”
Yuuji laughs, “Don’t worry, I’m used to dealing with crying people.” He looks to the side, scratching the back of his neck. “My ex-girlfriend was a real cryer when we were together. And, you know, there was this one time a girl was sobbing at my door for Sukuna.”
You groan at that, letting your head fall for a moment, “Are you okay with this?” You ask softly, “I don’t know, I feel like it can be so exhausting, especially since it’s your brother.” Especially with what you’ve been through, is what you want to say.
Yuuji tilts his head to the side, thinking for a moment, “Uh, no?” He shrugs, “Well, maybe I did when I was younger, but… now it’s a bit different.” He notices the way you tense, a small smile building on his lips, “I’m guessing he told you what happened?”
You cringe a bit, pulling the ice pack down from your eyes. “I’m sorry, Yuuji, I really didn’t want to pry, but I just feel… terrible. You know? I’m sorry, this is probably worse for you.” You look away from him a bit ashamed.
Yuuji laughs, shaking his head, “It’s fine, I don’t even want to hear an apology.” He bites the inside of his cheek, mumbling, ‘Sukuna owes you an apology…’ Before placing his hand on your shoulder, “But, I know why Sukuna is the way he is, and I’m just waiting until he’s comfortable to talk about it.”
That gives you some small reassurance, you wrap your arms around him, hugging him tiger then you’ve hugged most people in your life. You whisper, “Thank you so much, Yuuji, you’re really an amazing person.” You close your eyes, bringing him closer, “I’m sure it was really hard on you, too.”
Yuuji sighs, hugging you back, “Yeah, don’t worry.” Your name punctuates the sentence softly, and lovingly. His forehead resting on yours, “But, this is nice.” You giggle, nodding your head in agreement.
Only for the cute moment to be ruined by a knock, both you and Yuuji popping your head toward the direction. You blink a few times, slowly asking, “Did you invite someone?” You slowly pull away from his arms, pressing the ice pack against one of your arms.
Yuuji shakes his head, “Sukuna?”
You cringe at that name, praying inside your head it isn’t Sukuna at the door. “Who knows.” You turn away, tempted to hide in your room. You almost do, your feet naturally turning in the direction, getting ready to leave.
Yuuji notices, “Here, wait, I’ll check the peephole for you. I’ll see who's there.” He smiles, skipping to the door, trying to distract you, “Who knows? Maybe, it's a solicitor.”
You raise your eyebrows, switching the ice pack to a different eye. “You sound way too excited for a solicitor…” You’re even tempted to follow after him, but quickly decide that is a really bad idea. “What if what they’re selling you is complete garbage?”
Yuuji shrugs, “Don’t tell Sukuna this, but I buy everything they offer.” He smiles to himself, hand on the door knob. “On his card, phone number, and email, of course.” He laughs a little bit, “I can always hear him complaining about weird magazines, or email chains he’s mysteriously signed up to.”
You pass him a curious look, Yuuji just shrugs at this, “Hey, I can still be over what happened, but I like to think this is my revenge for all those years ago.”
You laugh again, making your way to the fridge. “Good for you, Yuuji.” You open the freezer, trying to find a frozen bag of peas, or any other frozen bag of vegetables. It’s also a way to hide your face when Yuuji opens the door, in the case where it is Sukuna at the door.
Despite the distance being short between you and the door, you can’t really hear the conversation he’s having, which automatically makes you assume it is a solicitor. Until you hear a very distinct, “Oh, that makes a lot of sense!” From Yuuji.
Weird, you think. Naturally wanting to look at who Yuuji is talking to, but you keep your attention on yourself. It could be a solicitor, and you sincerely don’t have the money to even entertain that idea.
You close the freezer door, tilting your head at Yuuji with one good eye. He turns his head to look at you, passing you a kind and comforting smile, “It’s for you!” He takes a few steps back, a gesture that makes you naturally move to the door to take his spot.
For me? You mentally think. Who would be here for you? You haven’t invited anyone over, more or less spoken to anyone besides Yuuji the entire day. So, who would be here to see you? Maybe, Nobara with a surprise ‘cheer up!’ visit? You hope not…
But, when you finally reach the door, you feel your lips part in shock, blinking at the person in front of you. Their white hair flutters with a soft blow in the wind, you don’t know how to react, more or less feel, to the sight of their face. It isn’t jealousy, but it isn’t excitement either. Their face is blank, emotionless, a stark contrast to when you first met them.
“Uraume?”
Next Chapter: Ch. 6 - Forgiveness?
Tag(s): Tag(s)!: @openup-yourmind, @sherlock-holmes-jr, @maskedpacific, @gasp-a-homo, @diogodxlot, @beahappyhoeee, @tojimeow, @sukunamylovexoxo, @yoontaedotin, @sukunaloverrr, @lanadelreylover4l, @raininginthemoonlight, @blackjanexx, @ethereally-lyann, @fritzzbitzz, @lanadelreylover4l, @chayunwoo, @madamteller
A/N: Hi hi everyone!! So, as of now, this was the last chapter that I pre-wrote, (excluding chapter 8) which means now, unfortunately, you do have to wait until I finish next chapter for an update. But, don't you worry too much, chapter six will come out sometime this, or next week. (Chapter 7 is more iffy on time.)
But, thank you for all the support so far, it genuinely has been so nice to hear what you think about the story, and how you feel about the characters. I'll try to have the next chapter out asap!
Thank for you reading! 🩷🥹
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