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pimento-playing-hopscotch · 1 year ago

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WIP Wednesday

Thank you for the tag, @inkweedandlizards @lightningboltreader @lemonlyman-dotcom and @carlos-in-glasses for the tag! 🥰🫶

This is for my prequel, TK's growing up years fic -

Dad: Hey, kiddo! We have finally set a date. Your old man is getting hitched on July 23rd, 2013. Be there or be square!

TK had received this text message from his dad a week ago. At the time, he’d replied, “Sounds great!”

And he’d seen his dad several times at work since then. But TK couldn’t get this text out of his head.

First, the word “finally” really did not need to be used. There was no room for “finally” for two people who were engaged after they had been dating for seven months.

The wedding date his dad had sent him, that was six weeks from now. And on that day, it still wouldn’t have been a year since his dad started dating Lorraine. It would be a year in October that he started dating her.

The following January, it would be a year since she moved in with him. TK felt like he was still trying to understand that when his dad told him that they were engaged. There was a part of TK that wondered if Lorraine really had a roommate that she had problems with, or if that was made up.

Every single one of the twenty days between when his dad told him he was engaged and the text with the date, TK had been hoping for the call saying that it was called off. But no; Lorraine and her knives of décor were here to stay (but seriously, who has a hobby of making wind chimes made of KNIVES?! His soon-to-be stepmother, that’s who).

TK was pretty deep into his thoughts that he didn’t pay much attention to the feeling of fingers flicking the tip of his ear. But the back of the same meaty hand colliding with the side of his face — now that he felt.

“Fuck!” TK exclaimed. “Malcolm, what the hell?”

“What?” snapped the 26-year-old firefighter who was straddling TK. “You were like a million miles away. Sue me for trying to get your attention”.

“Try?” TK repeated. “Dude, my ears are ringing”.

“God, you’re dramatic, Probie”. Malcolm rolled his eyes.

“I’m not your probie,” TK snapped. “And you know I’ve had concussions. I have a shift in four hours; I’m not trying to get a migraine”.

“You’re not trying to get off either, man,” Malcolm retorted. TK couldn’t argue with that.

“Yeah, well, I think I’m good”. TK moved to sit up, but Malcolm pushed him back into the mattress.

“I didn’t say we were done”.

TK glared up at him. “Well, I did. Lobster roll. Enough”. Malcolm muttered something under his breath that TK didn’t catch, but he acknowledged that TK had used his safe word. He moved enough for TK to sit up. “I’m sorry”. TK sighed. “You’re right. My head’s not there. Could we talk, actually?” Malcolm looked at him quizzically. “Talk?” he repeated, like it was a new concept.

“Yes. Talk”. TK sighed. “I’ve got a lot on my mind”.

“Well, I know a surefire way to get your pretty little head clear,” Malcolm purred, rubbing his hands up and down TK’s arms. “And besides TK, I can think of six better uses for your mouth… than to talk”. TK hated himself a little bit that it made him blush when Malcolm said shit like that.

“I’m serious,” TK said, grabbing Malcolm’s hands in his. “I’m really worried about my dad”. Malcolm sighed.

“You know, you’ve said that way too many times for someone who is legally an adult?” Malcolm told him. “TK. You don’t come here to talk. Your dad is a big boy. And Topher is going to be back in twenty minutes, and he can’t know you’re here, so…”

“Yeah, got it”. TK rolled off the bed and reached for his jeans. He knew that Malcolm was implying that they could still do something in that time, but TK really wasn’t in the mood for something. At least, not with Malcolm. There were times where he wished that he and Malcolm were in the same firehouse, but times like this made him glad that they weren’t.

As TK went back out into the humid New York summer air, he scolded himself for trying to open up to Malcolm in the first place.

Malcolm had been very clear on that several times over, that there was only one thing he wanted TK for.

And, TK thought bitterly, he couldn’t even really complain; at least this time he didn’t have to sit in Malcolm’s closet buck naked because Malcolm’s parents had stopped by their son’s (who they thought was straight) apartment unexpectedly.

But not talking with Malcolm hadn’t allayed TK’s need to talk to someone about this, he realized as he tried not to be jostled around too much by the subway train. After all, he was supposed to be the best man at this wedding; a wedding which he thought had no business taking place. A wedding that had severely dwindled down the list of people he could talk to. He did think of one person, though.

TK was fighting against the current of college students exiting their federal income taxation class at Columbia university. TK was trying to get into the lecture hall, because he needed to speak with the professor who was teaching it.

“TK?” Enzo said when TK had finally reached the front of the hall. “This is certainly a surprise,” he said, greeting him with a hug. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine”. TK nodded. That wasn’t a huge lie. “But Enzo, could we talk for a minute?”

“Of course, acorn,” Enzo smiled. “Do you want to sit, or…”

“I’ll sit”. TK nodded and sat in the swivel chair behind the desk at the front of the hall. “It spins,” TK said as he used his foot to turn the chair around a few times. “Cool”.

“I don’t know why they have that in here, to be honest,” Enzo chuckled. “If I were to sit there while teaching, I wouldn’t be able to actually see any of the students I’m addressing”.

“Huh”. TK said as he moved side to side in the chair.

“TK,” Enzo cleared his throat. “I know you didn’t come down here to play with the chair. What’s going on, acorn?”

TK brought the chair to a stop. “My dad set his wedding date. It’s in July”.

“Ah”. Enzo nodded as he leaned on the desk. “That’s soon”.

“Right!” TK exclaimed. “Why is it so soon?” He was struck by an unsettling thought. “Oh God, what if it’s that’s soon because they’re having a baby together? She doesn’t look pregnant, though. Would he tell me if that were the reason?”

“TK”. Enzo said gently. “I’m going to take a guess that you’re here in the event that isn’t the reason?” TK nodded. Enzo was otherworldly smart, the same way his mom was. If those two ever had a kid, that kid would find the cure for cancer before they started kindergarten.

“It’s just…” TK sighed. “I’ve never felt like I couldn’t talk to him about something. But I can’t talk to him about himself. I can’t talk to Mom about this. And Sophie’s thrilled, she loves Lorraine”. He started to nibble on his thumbnail. “Soph has spent a lot more time with her than I have, though”.

“But you don’t love Lorraine”. Enzo guessed.

“I don’t know her well enough”. TK shrugged. “But neither does he. They were barely together six months before getting engaged. This is the man who wants to plan everything in his life to death; what part of the plan is this?”

No pressure tagging - @dreamingofmickeywaffles @rachelsversion1 @firstprince-history-huh @tailoredshirt @herefortarlos @paperstorm @reyestrandd @kiloskywalker @eclectic-sassycoweyes @omnivorousdilettante @sugdenlovesdingle

#911 lone star #wip wednesday #911 ls fic #my fic #my wip fic #tk strand

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crushingcasanova · 7 months ago

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Hello, my darling!! How are you? How was your day? Have you had fun? I’ll be leaving soon for my weekly hang out with my mates and my darling but I’ll probably come to talk to you again mid-way.

I’ve missed you!! You were on my mind during my exams again… My chemistry paper went well, too! I have some questions for you….

૮꒰˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶꒱ა

~ 🌠

Hello dearie! I'm okay! I've had a strange day, with a migraine earlier... but it's been good! I was laughing to the point of tears twice today, actually. It was kinda nice! I hope you have fun at your hang out! I'm also glad to hear I was on your mind, too. I was stalking your blog all day to see if you were around, I missed you! >_< Here are my answers to your questions too!

I like a ton of different types, honestly. Mostly the obsessive and more "dominant" type, I guess, but it can vary from person to person! I just like someone who isn't afraid to be themselves and to show that they love me >_<

I don't have a bf or gf right now, unfortunately, so I don't really have anyone to review >_<

Be flirted! I like to flirt, but I'm not the best at it.

Flowers!

Sometimes, yes. Only good surprises!

Loves me, definitely.

Single and looking >_<

I would say pastel pink!

I have quite a few... I'd say Fight for Me is the most recent one to come to mind!

I don't really have a childhood love story... there's too many ideas bouncing around in my head to settle on one >_<

Honestly? A musical! And then dinner afterwards so we can yap about our thoughts while having some good food!

Older, preferably!

Probably the only ex I still talk to! He was really sweet to me and we only broke up because of timing. They still come and see me all the time and they gifted me a lot of stuff, we were really fundamentally similar, and had a ton of common interests. We fit really well!

I don't usually do much for Valentine's, but when I'm with someone on Valentine's, I make them a ton of gifts and make plans to hang out all day! >_<

When I was in about 5th grade, but that's a bit iffy since I'm aromantic. It's hard to know!

Text most of the time but I do like calling!

I can! I have been friends with one of mine since we broke up!

Either my last one or the one I ended in October last year. I think probably the latter, since that was really messy.

I would say very, very sweet!

Baby don't hurt me /lyr

110% but I feel like it's more of an unlimited source!

Somewhat? I've never experienced it but I've experienced friendship at first sight, so.. it's possible!

It depends! I usually make original nicknames for my loves, and sometimes I'll use ones like honey, dear, or sweetheart in between. I usually use whatever they like!

Picture of the heart is below! >_<

#casanova's posts #casanova's collection #casanova's mutuals #zennotixs #🌠 anon

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punkbakerchristine · 11 months ago

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hello, tumblr, i am 30 years old and i got into baking and cooking on october 7, 2023–if you know anything about october 7, 2023, you should know how much all of this means to me 😅 i’m a gentile girl trying to be a mensch. am yisrael chai, don’t even think about it 🇮🇱

a little bit about me: i am an artist and a writer with a long background in science and engineering. i love animals (namely, dogs, cats, horses, birds, bats, rabbits, and reptiles), cartoons, books, and movies. i’m a hockey player at heart. i love formula 1. i love top gear and those three zany british men. i love the winter olympics. i love halloween and christmas. i’m a west coast girl. i love hawai’i and the ocean. i’m making a graphic novel. i was friends with chris cornell (yes, him). i’m a grunge fan but grunge fans don’t like me, though: you know that weird little alt rock kid seeing the heavy metal band that no one thinks about? that’s me.

i struggled with anorexia in my late teen years and obesity in the back half of my twenties: if you want to know what it’s like to deal with a debilitating eating disorder and then push nearly 300 pounds, imagine you’re drowning… and then someone hands you a big wedding cake. all jokes aside, i actually have a fat kink, if you can believe that. i actually have a number of kinks, but that’s one of my main ones. i deliberately gained weight to heal from my eating disorder, and to fulfill something that i had been curious about pretty much my whole life (like, “what if i got really fat, as fat as i could be?”) and i felt good. i loved being heavy and the idea of being a “big beautiful woman” if you will (especially when fat women have been worshipped for millennia; the whole skinny craze is relatively new). but i couldn’t keep it up, though: i started having trouble with my heart and my stomach, i was having migraines, and most of all, i was getting edema in my feet.

as of my writing this, since i started losing weight back in mid-july, i have lost 59 pounds, down from my heaviest ever at 268: i crossed the 200 pound threshold back in 2015, and now that i write it out, it would’ve been something to hit that number again after ten years (i’ll go with nine, though 🤷🏻‍♀️).

i’m pansexual and polyamorous. i’m single… but jimmy cracked corn and i don’t care (really, i don’t even think about relationships). i do have a crush, though, on a jewish man and i’ve felt this way about him for almost three years now. i have a crush on him (and he’s even said “i love you” to me) even though he’s in a relationship… yeah. the love of my life is with someone else. but like, i want to see him happy, though, you know? i love him perhaps more so following october 7.

october 7. the day of that attack—the day, the very day—i baked my very first loaf of bread, a simple bloomer courtesy of paul hollywood, one of my influences in the culinary world: as the dough was proofing, i saw a huge horde of people posting about palestine and israel, and it reminded me of a guy who ran into a convenience store at the start of the pandemic and he yelled out, “can someone please tell me what the hell is going on?” that was my reaction to it all. i just wanted to know what had happened and no one would tell me… and a friend of mine finally said “pray for israel.” i asked what happened and she told me. i just foresaw everything unraveling from that point forward. so i took the bloomer out of the oven and it felt fated, like it was meant to be. my basic thought was “the world is going to need art and words, and also, people willing to get down and make things to eat”. this is going down fast. (in other words, my healing my body from itself and satisfying a kink had a point after all 😜).

and it might seem counterintuitive, but baking and cooking has actually helped me lose even more weight than i can ever imagine (besides weightlifting and aerobics and boxing and martial arts and yoga, of course). you might think that baking cakes and pies and cookies and making dinner every night would make me 300+ pounds tout suite, but it’s actually done the opposite (so, sorry, feeder community)—and if anything, i enjoy every cookie and slice of cake now. there’s no fad diets here or anything fancy with me, and even with 60 pounds lost i still have a chubby belly (i don’t mind, though—my stomach has been through a lot, it should keep *something*), so i’m definitely not a fitblr.

since october, i’ve felt this need to blog my journey in baking and cooking, and away from my personal blog, too. stuff i made, recipes i think of (and maybe some that need to be passed on, too?), and food i want to make.

my art blog is on here at nuagederose—i also have a therapy blog, theghostandthehealer—and my instagram is badmotorartist. if erotic band fiction (among other things) is your thing, my ao3 is josiebelladonna.

and yeah, i’m 30 and i think i found the proverbial missing jigsaw puzzle piece. age really is just a number!

#text #introductory post #bakers of tumblr #bakers gonna bake

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dakotakazansky · 10 months ago

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🎶let spotify predict your 2024!🎶

shuffle your on repeat playlist and the first twelve songs represent your 2024

Thank you @startrekfangirl2233 for the tag, this was really fun.

January: Villain-K/DA, Madison Beer, Kim Petras, League of Legends

Straight up villain, straight up villain Yeah, no feeling, yeah, no feeling I'm alive, but I'm dead Hear my voice up in your head Watch it fill you full of dread 'Til you go pow

February: Electric Touch(Taylor’s Version)- Taylor Swift ft. F.O.B.

I’ve got my money on things going badly, Got a history of stories ending sadly, Still hoping that the fire won’t burn me, Just one time, just one time All I know is this could either break my heart or bring it back to life

March: I Did Something Bad-Taylor Swift

I can feel the flames on my skin Crimson red paint on my lips If a man talks shit, then I owe him nothing I don't regret it one bit, 'cause he had it coming They say I did something bad Then why's it feel so good? They say I did something bad But why's it feel so good? Most fun I ever had And I'd do it over and over and over again if I could It just felt so good, good

April: Little Girl Gone- CHINCHILLA

Wow You're so fuckin' stupid Been a while since my head was this polluted Lucky I know my own worth … Little girl gone, got a gun from a gangster Run little girl, run little girl, bang, ha Say that again, I didn't quite hear ya Messed with the wrong bitch in the wrong era I been at work and I got my badge of honour Honey, I've changed so much since I last saw you

May: Last Night-Morgan Wallen

No way it was the last night that we break up I see your tail lights in the dust You call your momma, I call your bluff In the middle of the night, pull it right back up Yeah, my, my friends say, "Let her go" Your friends say, "What the hell?" I wouldn't trade your kind of love for nothin' else

June: Heartless-The Weeknd

'Cause I'm heartless And I'm back to my ways 'cause I'm heartless All this money and this pain got me heartless Low life for life 'cause I'm heartless Said I'm heartless Tryna be a better man but I'm heartless Never be a wedding plan for the heartless Low life for life 'cause I'm heartless (heartless)

July: Monsters-All Time Low ft. Demi Lovato and blackbear

Thinking about you, you're in my head Even without you, I still feel dead Why do I run back to you, like I don't mind if you fuck up my life? Dead, thinking about you, you're in my head Even without you, I still feel dead Why do I run back to you, like I don't mind if you fuck up my life?

August: My Type(Little Attitude)-Bryce Savage

And she's an earth sign, she likes wine Got me grounded like it's worth time, so fine She likes sippin' 'til the sunrise, all night She likes energy and sunlight and good times, uh And she dress in all black, she likes that I have an arm covered in all tats, we drive fast Listen to the songs from our past on full blast Never looking back, she likes that, oh, she likes that

September: Main Attraction-Jeremy Renner

Roaming through the city like the track of time The freedom is mine Riding the lines You know how I like it, yeah Pedal to the medal, I'm your soldier We can take it for miles And let it all wild Just how I like it

October: Hate Me-Ellie Goulding, Juice WRLD

Hate me, hate me, tell me how you hate me Tell me how I'm trash and you could easily replace me Tell me that I'm strung out, wasted on the daily Prolly 'cause there's no one around me numbin' all my pain Prolly 'cause there's no umbrella to shield me from all the rain Probably because you're the one playin' the mind games You hate me because I don't let you play no mind games They give me migraines and damage my brain Date me, break me, easily replace me Hopefully you see it clear, hopefully it's HD Bet you wonder why the last few months I've been spacey In your head, I sing

November: @ my worst- blackbear

Don't try to call, do not disturb, I do not want to speak This is the end, demons are friends, angels are enemies I'm just a fool, stuck in the past, your worst memories I'm not ready for you to forget me

December: Villain Era-Bryce Savage

She's in her villain era, chapstick on with dark mascara You better send a prayer up, hoping that she'll maybe spare ya She's in her villain era, chapstick on with dark mascara You better send a prayer up, hoping that she'll maybe spare ya (Spare ya)

Well Spotify really said we gonna be in the villain era.

No Pressure Tags: @desert-fern, @horseshoegirl, @thedroneranger, @roosterforme, @sarahsmi13s, @teacupsandtopgun, @cherrycola27

#tag game #Spotify 2024 prediction #about me #my on repeat playlist really said villain era #villain era for a year

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shakespeareanwannabe · 2 years ago

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One Hell of a Year: Christmas

Summary: When Molly Henderson makes the move from Chicago to Lockhart, Texas, she doesn’t expect much. A new teaching job, a new community, and maybe a few new friends, but what she didn’t expect was to meet Michael Perry, a man with a heart of gold, October eyes, and a smile that made her tummy do a strange little flip-flop. With Michael by her side, Molly finds that she may just be able to not only find a life in Lockhart, but thrive there as well.

Warnings: cursing, drinking

Disclaimers: Nothing recognizable belongs to me. Sending the warmest wishes of the season to everyone!

It was the type of school year that most teachers hated, where Christmas Eve landed on a Saturday, meaning that school stayed open until the 23rd of December. Meaning that every kid, teacher, and administrator was more than ready for the break to finally arrive.

Luckily, Renata was one of those administrators who seemed to understand that, during the final week of school, nobody wanted to be there. The kids had already mentally checked out, daydreaming of sugarplums dancing in their heads, while teachers were thinking ahead to family gatherings, work parties, and the stresses and joys of gift-giving. The morning of the last day of school was spent in the classrooms, where teachers read stories, gave gifts, and led their students through holiday themed art projects. The afternoon was spent together in the gym, with the loudspeakers playing Christmas carols and holiday music while students danced, ran around, and sang along.

For the last 40 minutes of the day, Michael and Molly took their students outside, since their prep periods had taken place during the Christmas dance party.

After a game of 4s vs. 5s soccer, Molly and Michael stood off to the side while their kids milled around, chatting and goofing off.

“Five more minutes,” Molly muttered, eyeing her watch.

“Thank god, I’ve got a migraine that could kill a small elephant right now,” he commiserated, wincing as one of her students screeched with laughter.

“You sure you want to go to the Christmas party tonight?”

Apparently, every year Renata threw a holiday party at her house for her hard-working staff. Everyone from her Vice Principal down to the SERT who worked one day a week and the custodian who worked the nightshift were invited. Even certain supply teachers who had been in the school enough to get noticed were invited.

“Yeah, it’ll be fun,” he sighed. “Renata always puts on a hell of a spread.”

“Then what’s wrong?”

Michael allowed his gaze to drift over to her and he bit his lip. “So…Shannon and Mark are in Ireland with her family.”

“Yeah.”

“Cecelia and David are having a household Christmas because they don’t want Alvin to be overwhelmed.”

“Uh-huh…”

“Gabriella and Antonio invited Gabriel, Kostas, and my dad to spend Christmas with Antonio’s family in San Antonio.”

“Okay…” Molly furrowed her brow. “So…?”

Michael sighed with a bit of a chuckle. “We haven’t exactly discussed our own Christmas plans, Molly.”

Molly blinked at him once, then twice. “We haven’t, have we?”

He shook his head, a small smile pulling on his lips. “Nope. I know we’re spending tonight together,” he whispered, gazing around the courtyard to make sure the students weren’t listening, before continuing, “and I know it’s still really early in our relationship, but if you aren’t going back to Chicago…” He let his question hang in the air, and Molly let out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.

They honestly hadn’t discussed their holiday plans, mostly because Molly assumed he was going to spend Christmas with his family. Plus, she didn’t exactly want to tell him that her Christmas plans most likely included drinking eggnog straight from the carton and watching every black and white Christmas movie she could get her hands on until she fell asleep. She knew that when he heard that, he would bring her along to his family festivities, and she didn’t want to intrude. Not again.

“D—” Molly paused to clear her throat. “Do you want to come spend Christmas with me?”

Michael smiled crookedly, one corner of his mouth breaking free as he leaned towards her. “I’d love that,” he whispered, looking at her with that longing look in his eyes that she always saw the split second before he kissed her.

“Great…” she giggled, wrapping her arms around herself like a lovestruck teen.

Michael peeked at his watch. “One more minute.”

It seemed like most of the students were in tune with the tiny clock face on his wrist because the moment he said that a good chunk of students began picking up their bags and heading towards the edge of school property.

“Gillian, if you step one toe off school property before that bell rings, you’ll have detention when we come back next year!” Michael yelled over the growing din, watching as one of his more belligerent students rolled her eyes and took a miniscule step back from the fence line.

“That goes for you too, Cameron!” Molly called to Gillian’s brother.

Both teachers angled their bodies so they could keep an eye on the students who seemed more interested in pushing buttons than escaping to the holidays scot-free.

“Thirty seconds…” Molly muttered, her foot tapping against the tarmac.

“If we’re spending Christmas together, is it okay to assume that we’re spending New Years the same way?” Michael whispered.

“It’s a date,” Molly smiled. “What brought that up?”

Michael grinned. “This.” He brought his wrist up to eye level and started whispering. “Ten…nine…eight…”

Molly giggled, watching as the students lined up at the fence like Thoroughbreds before a big race. “Seven…six…five…four…”

“Three…two…one!”

“Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays!” Molly shouted out as the doors to the school flew open and kids of all sizes and ages came flooding out.

“Bye! Be good! See you in two weeks!” Michael fist bumped and high fived passing students before turning to her. “Let’s get the heck out of here!”

Molly was…relieved, to say the least, when she realized that she wasn’t overdressed for Renata’s party. According to the office gossip, Mr. Mendez managed a hotel in town and was able to reserve their ballroom at a steal of a price for his wife’s holiday staff party. When Molly had heard that it was taking place inside the town’s only hotel (“only but fancy,” Michael had corrected her when she was trying to figure out what to wear), she had primped a little bit more than she may have if it had been taking place at, say, Renata’s home.

Molly tugged at the neckline of her short red dress. It was modest, long enough to brush at her knees and the straight neckline and off the shoulder cap sleeves kept everything mostly contained, but she knew she looked good, and she was glad to see some of the other teachers and spouses had turned up in suits and dresses as well. She, however, only had eyes for Michael, who was dressed completely in black. Black slacks, black button down, black tie, and black blazer. Her man, and it made her heart skip a beat to think that she was lucky enough to be there with him, was looking damn good and, if it wasn’t for the fact that they were at a faculty party, she would have been looking for a bathroom in which to show him her appreciation.

But, as it were, they were standing in the corner of the room with Lauren and Alex, cocktails in hand, laughing at Alex’s appalling Christmas nightmare story.

“All I’m saying is that, if I ever even smell sugar cookies again, I might have a nervous breakdown,” Alex finished to peals of laughter.

“Remind me not to invite you over for the holidays, Alex,” Molly teased, casually resting her arm across Michael’s shoulders, and allowing her hand to play with the short, slightly curly hairs that were beginning to grow at the base of his neck. “We’re planning on baking enough to break my oven.”

“If it’s more of those pumpkin spice things, count me in. But sugar cookies make me want to lose my lunch.” Alex shuddered theatrically,

“Remind me how you got this far in being a kindergarten teacher, and you still have a weak ass stomach?” Lauren taunted, her empty glass dangling between her fingers as she waited for her husband, Darren to return with a refill.

Michael tuned out their brewing argument, too entranced by the fingers in his hair, the nails lightly scratching his neck, and the sight of Molly’s smile. With the glimmer of Christmas lights that were hung from every wall, she looked ethereal. Ever since they had decided to spend Christmas together, she had been downright giddy, and it showed. Happiness radiated from her every pore like sunshine, bathing him in warmth and solace, and he couldn’t believe that he was the one who made her that happy.

Typically, Michael liked to take things slow. Historically, he liked to have all his ducks in a row and know the outcome when he was about to take a new step in his life. He didn’t like not knowing where a line of thinking or questioning would lead in his personal life. In the classroom, he was all for it, but he didn’t want his life to be a learning experience. He didn’t want anyone to suffer from the fallout if his actions or thoughts led him astray. So, it was strange to him to be moving so fast in his relationship, but he couldn’t help it. Something about Molly’s infectious warmth and devotion made him want to leap off the highest cliff alongside her, just to say they had made it through.

A soft smile tugged at his lips as he watched her. When she had first arrived at the school, Michael had been able to sense her hesitancy, her nervousness about being in a new place. But now, watching her tease Alex and Lauren, loving how she stayed physically connected to him without being overbearing, and knowing that they still had a-ways to go before all their dirty laundry was out for the world to see…it didn’t scare him. It didn’t make him want to sit and think about the consequences of his actions. He wanted the life he could see laid out in front of him. Him and Molly, living together, a ring on her finger, a couple of kids of their own because God knew they had spent enough time caring for other people’s children. It was an idyllic life for him, one he didn’t expect to want with all the travelling and wandering he had done as a young adult, but he felt an ache for it in his soul.

“So, you two are spending Christmas together?” Darren asked, delivering a new drink to his wife.

“Thank Christ,” Lauren muttered, downing half her drink in one go. “I was getting sick and tired of all the kicked puppy and lovesick stares these two were throwing at each other. I’m glad you two finally got your shit together. Now don’t screw it up!”

Molly giggled at her inebriated friend, combing her fingers through the back of his hair once more. “Don’t worry, I have no intention on screwing this up,” she smiled over at him, her eyes soft and filled with an unnamed something. “I’d be an idiot to screw this up,” she murmured, so soft that only he could hear her.

Michael, being the intelligent, highly educated man that he was, wished he could say that the unnamed something he was feeling made itself known in a sudden flash of understanding, like a shot by Cupid’s bow or a sucker punch to the gut. But it didn’t. It had snuck up on him, a feeling that had been growing inside his heart since that last week of August when Renata had asked him to help the new teacher set up her room. It was a feeling that he had been feeling without being able to name it until he looked over at Molly, her eyes bright like Christmas lights and her smile worth more than all the Christmas presents in the world.

Softly, deftly, he stroked his hand up and down the length of her forearm, marveling in the softness of her skin and wondering how he had gotten so damn lucky. He had made a lot of mistakes in his life, some that Molly didn’t know about yet, but somehow fate or God or whoever had seen fit to bless him anyway.

Michael bowed his head slightly, pressing his lips to the skin just above the crease of Molly’s elbow, as the name of that unnamed feeling faded into his mind.

“Ugh, you two are sickeningly sweet,” Lauren whined, leaning into her husband. “Go dance or something before you make my cold heart grow three sizes.”

Molly giggled and allowed Michael to lead her to the small dance floor that had been set up. Renata and her husband, Charlie, had been dancing all night in each other’s arms, and they smiled at the newcomers as they stepped closer.

Michael tugged Molly close, mindful of the fact that their shared boss was not even five feet away and began to sway with her to the soft Christmas song playing over the loudspeaker.

“You know, Lauren was telling me that she thinks this song is pushy and misogynistic,” Molly mused, laying her head on his shoulder.

“Oh yeah?” he chuckled, brushing his fingers lightly over the skin of her back. “What do you think?”

“I think it’s a cute song…just don’t overanalyze it,” she sighed, curling further into his arms, and swaying lightly. “What do you think?”

“I think I’m in love with you,” Michael bit back the words he desperately wanted to say, wanting to share the revelation he had had. But it wasn’t the time. Not with their boss and coworkers milling about. He would tell her, and it would be soon, but not now.

Instead, he twirled her under his arm and pulled her back, closer, reveling in her laughter.

“I think you’re lucky we don’t live someplace cold because then I would be singing this to you every time you try to get out of bed,” he whispered in her ear.

Molly met his gaze, a hint of longing fire in her eyes. “Oh yeah? Would you bribe me too?”

“Oh yeah. Another drink, another cigarette…whatever it takes to keep you in my arms.”

Molly smiled softly and nuzzled into him as they danced, barely shuffling their feet as they enjoyed their closeness. “You wouldn’t have to bribe me, honey,” she whispered. “In your arms is the only place I want to be.”

The next morning, Molly woke up to a feeling of…something. It had been growing inside of her ever since Michael had taken her to Amarillo to see the snowfall and last night, when Michael had laid her down in bed and stripped her body and soul bare, she thought she finally might be able to put a name to the emotion.

She smiled softly as she felt a pair of plush lips dance up her spine and across her shoulders, the arms around her midsection tightening.

“Mmm good morning,” she murmured, ghosting her hand up and down his arm.

“Morning…” Michael shifted, pressing a kiss into her hair as he released her halfway from his grip. “Or should I say afternoon?” he giggled, bringing his arm up to show her the face of his watch.

“Damn…I can’t tell you the last time I slept in until 11,” she chuckled rolling over to face him.

“Welcome to Christmas break, baby.” He peppered kisses all over her face, each peck pulling laughter from her. “I’m so glad we get to spend it together.”

Molly sighed, a wave of bliss washing over her. “Me too.”

“Though I’m a little surprised that you’re not going back to Chicago,” he added, pressing up onto one arm to gaze down at her. “I thought you’d do a Friends-mas or something.”

Molly felt her face burn and her eyes darted around the room, desperate to land on something other than the man hovering over her. “Oh…um, I didn’t really feel like third-wheeling this Christmas. All my friends in Chicago are married with kids and I didn’t want them to feel obligated to entertain me when they’ve got their own things going on.”

“I’m sure they wouldn’t have minded.”

“No, I know. I’m sure some of them would have even loved it if I could run interference with their in-laws, but I didn’t want to just invite myself and, since nobody asked, I figured it would be best if I just stayed put this Christmas.” She smiled and kissed his arm. “What about you? I’m sure Alvin would have loved spending Christmas with his favourite Uncle, or that Antonio’s family would have welcomed you.”

Michael shrugged, tracing his index finger over her nose and lips. “I’m sure they would have, but I didn’t ask. I actually prefer having a quiet Christmas at home with you.”

Molly smiled as tears sprung to her eyes. “Me too,” she whispered, burying her head in his chest as he rolled, bringing her on top of him in a comforting embrace.

As safe as she felt, Molly knew she had no reason to lie. The lies, like snow in Chicago, fell from her lips easily and freely, a defense mechanism she had developed over the years to keep herself safe. She knew she didn’t not need to keep herself safe from Michael. There was no reason to fear him, but she couldn’t help herself. She didn’t want him to think she was…less. Especially since, in his arms, she felt like so much more than what she was.

She chuckled softly as she felt Michael’s lips nuzzle into her hair. “Does my hair taste that good, honey, or are you just hungry?”

“Every part of you tastes good, Molly,” he winked down at her. “But I wouldn’t say no to some real food. I think it’s safe to say that we burned off all the alcohol and food from the party when we got home.”

Molly lightly thwacked him as she sat up and reached for her Christmas pajamas, folded neatly on the bench at the end of her bed.

“What do you say we don’t practice what we preach about healthy eating and make some Christmas cookies for brunch?”

Michael rolled out of bed, lightly hopping onto his feet as he began a frantic search for his boxers. “Gingerbread or sugar cookies?”

Molly winked as she pulled on her baggy Snoopy nightgown and grabbed a pair of lacy boyshorts from her top drawer, “Why not both? It is Christmas after all.”

Michael wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in for a quick smooch. “Careful, Ms. Henderson. You keep this up, and I’m going to want to spend every Christmas with you.”

Molly gasped dramatically, one hand hovering over her chest as she swooned, adopting the lilting accent of a Southern belle. “Oh what a travesty that would be.”

Michael tugged her upright and kissed her deeply. “Alright, you dork. Let me go get my overnight bag and we can start baking up some cookies for Santa.”

Molly playfully saluted him. “Sir, yes, sir. I’ll have the ingredients and the recipe ready and waiting.”

“Good job, private,” Michael laughed, passing by her, and playfully tapping her on the ass as he left the room and descended the staircase and finding his overnight bag where he left it in the hall the night before.

God, but he really did love that woman. Even though they had both been desperate to get their hands on each other, and even though Michael had been ready and raring to go, Molly had had the wherewithal to grab his bag from the backseat of her car before they stumbled up to her front door, more interested in sucking the air from each others’ lungs than they were in actually opening the front door. He had dropped the bag immediately upon entry, opting instead to wrap his arms around her waist and carry her up to her bedroom, but he was thankful that it was at least in the building. He didn’t exactly fancy making a run for his car in his boxers. Now, he didn’t have to.

Michael ducked into the guest bathroom and quickly dressed in his softest pair of grey sweatpants and a black Queen t-shirt before brushing his teeth and washing his face. Satisfied with his appearance, he entered the kitchen and gaped.

First, Molly looked like a damn Christmas angel, wrapped in her soft green Snoopy nightgown which hid the lacy boyshorts he had watched her don, the wintery Texan sun streaming in through the window illuminating her face and figure in a way that made Michael want to say forget the baking and haul her back upstairs for another round.

Second, he had severely underestimated how quickly his girlfriend could move when motivated.

In the span of the seven minutes he had been gone, Molly had pulled out all of the ingredients, mixing bowls, and measuring cups, and had already begun portioning out ingredients.

“Gingerbread cookies first, babe,” she called over her shoulder. “We can let that dough chill in the freezer while we whip up the sugar cookies.”

“Ma’am, yes, ma’am,” Michael murmured before clearing his throat. “Tell me what to do. I am but your loyal nutcracker.”

Michael hoped her giggle would never cease to make him smile.

“You mix, Muscle Man,” she joked, handing him a half-full mixing bowl. “I’ll measure out the ingredients and pour them in the bowl.”

“You’re telling me that more stuff goes into this?”

Molly giggled, pouring in another cup of sticky sweet molasses. “I thought we could triple the recipe. Y’know, so we can give some to your family when they get back in town.”

Michael’s face melted. “You’re so sweet. Thank you for thinking of my family.”

Molly looked shocked. “Babe, of course I thought of your family! They were so nice to me on Thanksgiving, and I’ve already gotten a couple of texts from them wishing me a Merry Christmas.” Molly began pouring in a mix of dry ingredients.

“Babe, are you sure the batter is supposed to have this much flour?” Michael coughed as a white plume erupted from the large mixing bowl.

Molly giggled as she gestured for him to continue mixing. “Well, if my calculations are correct, then we need to triple this recipe so we can send some to each member of your giant family. So, yes. We do need this much of the dry mix.”

Michael coughed again, white powder dusting his dark t-shirt. “Y-you make ‘giant’ sound like a bad thing.”

Molly giggled, gently hip checking him out of the way so she could take over folding in the flour. “I mean, it’s not a bad thing. They’re just kind of intimidating at first glance. All those people and names to keep straight.” She hummed happily. “But they were very sweet to send me gifts.”

While Molly had been preparing for the party the night before, Michael had returned to his home to pack his overnight bag and had returned with a sack of gifts that his father had dropped off for the two of them.

“I told you they liked you,” Michael sighed, stepping in behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist.

Molly smiled softly, tilting her head back into his hard chest. “You did. I shouldn’t have doubted you.”

Michael gasped playfully. “You doubted me?”

Molly giggled, her head falling forward as she continued mixing the batter, her hair curtaining her face and hiding her features. “I kind of don’t want to say now.”

“Wow…and all I’ve ever been is nice to you. What did I do to deserve such treatment?”

Molly giggled again, passing the mixing bowl back to him. “Aww, I’m sorry, honey. Did I hurt your feelings?”

Michael pouted, mixing the batter once more before putting it to the side. “Uh-huh…”

Molly turned from turning the oven on and wrapped her arms around his waist. “What can I do to make it better?”

Michael smirked down at her, wrapping his arms around her in turn and carefully lifting her up onto the counter. “I could think of a few things…”

“Oh yeah?”

Michael nuzzled his nose against hers, feeling her warmth and the very essence of her envelope him. “Yeah. You think you can help me with them?”

Molly nodded, a beautiful smile brightening her face. “I think I can do that,” she murmured before pressing her lips against his.

Michael moaned softly, gently cupping the edge of her jaw to bring her closer and losing himself in her.

Michael’s eyes cracked open with a yawn and found himself surrounded by a truly idyllic scene.

The Christmas tree in the corner, decorated with Molly’s ornaments and a few of his mother’s treasured memories, sat in the corner of the room, gently lit by warm white lights. The fire they had started in the fireplace had burned down to embers and the spicy scent of smoke and cedar lingered in the air. The plate of Christmas cookies they had baked earlier in the day sat half-eaten on the table in front of the couch while George Bailey and the town of Bedford Falls sang Auld Lang Syne on the screen. The Moon hung high in the sky out the window, lighting up the angles of Molly’s face where she was cuddled into his shoulder, her mug of hot chocolate sitting on the side table. If there was snow falling outside, Michael might have thought that he had been transported into a Christmas movie. It was perfect, made even more so by the sweet girl who was cuddled up against him.

Michael yawned again, bringing his wrist up to eye level before groaning.

“Molly?” he whispered, gently nudging his dozing girlfriend. “Honey, wake up…”

Molly yawned, cuddling even closer to him. “Hmm?”

He craned his neck, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Merry Christmas, baby. It’s officially Christmas Day.”

Molly groaned as she pushed herself up, stretching her arms above her head. “How?”

Michael chuckled. “It’s 12:07 a.m., honey. Merry Christmas.”

She smiled a sleepy smile before kissing his lips gently. “Merry Christmas, Michael Perry.”

Michael stroked her hair and kissed her back. “You wanna head to bed?”

Molly yawned again, triggering a yawn in him. “Do we have to?”

Michael chuckled softly. “You can’t want to watch another movie.”

She turned her gaze to the screen, frowning slightly. “Aww, I missed the ending.”

“It’s okay, honey, so did I. We can rewatch it tomorrow…or later today, I guess.”

“Mmm, okay.”

Molly stood, stretching slightly in her new plaid pajamas. It turns out that, when Michael had shared a story about his mother always buying her children new Christmas themed pajamas for Christmas Eve, Molly had decided to take up her work and bought them both red and green plaid pajama sets. He had been so touched and had almost come out and told her that he loved her, but he held back. That had happened a few times over the course of the day, but he didn’t want her to think that it was just the magic of Christmas prompting his admission. But staring at her, standing in the dim light of the Christmas tree, he found the words almost slipping out again.

“…Michael?”

“Hmm?”

She smiled softly at him. “I asked if you wanted to open our Christmas presents to each other right now. We could start a new Christmas tradition with just you and me.”

Michael stood with a groan, his joints cracking as he raised himself to his full height. He strode over to Molly and wrapped his arms around her from behind, nuzzling into that space between her neck and shoulder where his head just seemed to fit so perfectly.

“I think that sounds perfect,” he murmured, pulling away just slightly so he could sit on the ground next to the tree, pulling her hand so she moved with him to the floor.

Giggling quietly, Molly sank to her knees in front of him, her face gently illuminated by the dying embers of the fire. Twisting slightly, she tugged out a large bag from behind the tree. Michael smiled softly, feeling that spark of childhood excitement light in his stomach.

“Could you pass me that small red box, baby?” Michael murmured, pointing out the small red box topped by a white bow.

Passing it over to him, Molly rested her hands in her lap and smiled nervously.

“C-can I go first?” At Michael’s gentle nod, she pushed the large green bag towards him. “I couldn’t decide whether to go practical or fun, so I just got you both.” Molly explained quietly, fiddling with her fingers in her lap as she watched him open the first bundle.

“Ukulele strings?”

Biting her lip, Molly nodded. “I overheard you complaining to Alex that you needed to get new strings but couldn’t find the time to head over to the store to get some. See? Practical.”

Michael leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. “Thank you, baby. You saved me from making the trip myself, leaving me more time to spend with you.”

Molly cast her eyes to the side, reaching up to play with her hair for a moment. “You’re welcome. Open the next one. It’s the fun one.”

Michael grinned at her infectious excitement and tugged a large box out of the bag. “A Lego Star Wars set?” he asked incredulously.

Molly bit her lip again, shuffling closer. “I…I remember you saying that Star Wars is your favourite series at Halloween, and David mentioned at Thanksgiving that you always wanted a Lego set but never got one. I thought—”

Molly’s breath caught as Michael crushed her to his chest, burying his head in her neck. “Thank you, baby,” he whispered into her hair, his lips just brushing her neck. “This is the best gift I could have asked for.”

Molly sniffled, caught off guard by the rush of affection and love she felt for this sweet, sweet man. “You’re welcome, Michael. Merry Christmas.”

With a soft kiss to his cheek, she pulled away and settled back on her knees.

Smiling shyly down at the red box he kept playing with in his hands, he shrugged. “I-it’s not much. But when I saw it, I thought of you, and I thought you’d love it. If you don’t, just tell me and you can exchange it. I kept the receipt just in case.” He bit his lip and rubbed the back of his neck, feeling the heat rush to his cheeks.

“Michael…” Molly laid a gentle hand on his knee and smiled. “I already know I’m going to love it.” Michael opened his mouth to rebuttal, but she pressed a finger to his lips. “You’re the most thoughtful, kind man I’ve ever met. I already know I’m going to love it because it came from you.”

Michael grinned and passed her the box. “I really hope that’s true.”

Maintaining eye contact, Molly pulled the bow off and opened the box.

Tears welled up in her eyes as she pressed a hand to her mouth. “Michael…” she murmured through her fingers. “This is too much.”

The silver snowflake pendant glimmered and glinted in the dim light of the Christmas tree, the pretty white pearls shining smoothly in a small ring on the inside of the snowflake while the crystal-clear stones scattered throughout the design twinkled up at her.

“It’s definitely not too much,” he replied quietly, shimmying closer. “I saw it while we were in Amarillo and knew I wanted you to have it. This way…” He gently pulled the twisted silver chain free and let the pendant hang like a star in the sky. “This way, you’ll always have the snow with you.” He moved around behind her and waited as she gathered her hair up so he could place it around her neck. Pressing a small kiss to the nape of her neck as the lobster claw clasp clicked closed, Michael used his hands on her shoulders to gently spin her to face him. “You make it beautiful, Molly,” he whispered, wiping a tear from her cheek.

Molly replied with a deep kiss, wrapping her arms around him as though she never wanted to part from him, which, in her defence, she really didn’t.

Smiling, Michael pulled away briefly to rub his thumb across the apple of her cheek. “Merry Christmas, Molly,” he whispered, nuzzling his nose against hers.

“Merry Christmas, Michael.” She kissed him firmly as he lowered her down to the rug, where they continued their celebration until the Sun hung high in the sky.

Tags List: @budcooper , @mattmurdocksscars , @aellynera, @itspdameronthings, @beenthroughalot

#michael perry #michael perry x molly henderson #oscar isaac #oscar issac characters #oscar issac x reader #oscar issac imagine #wont back down #oscar issac fic #one hell of a year fic

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mhsargent · 2 years ago

Text

This one is a bit rambly, disjointed, and self-indulgent. Feel free not to read. Really.

48 = 2 x 2 x 2 x 2 x 3 = 2^4 x 3^1.

I’ve survived another lap around the sun. This last one was a far nearer thing than I am (yet) comfortable talking about, but I find myself starting my 49th lap grateful to still be here.

As some of you know, (and for the rest, I am telling you now) I have been in an on-going state of chronic migraine for the last 9 ½ years. There have been more intense and less intense stretches over those years, but this last 9 months has been about the worst I have ever experienced. A little over 4 weeks ago, after starting on a new medication, I started to experience notable and significant improvements. It was only then that I really became aware of how badly off I’ve been since October of last year. (Spoiler: it was bad, y’all.)

As I come back to the world, I am grateful to still be experiencing life. I appreciate the ability to listen to music and to participate in conversation. I am happy to be able to wash dishes and reply to email. I am collecting little moments of simple joy to balance the frustration at not being able to do more.

And so, as I try to set a sustainable pace for this next lap, I am making efforts to spend more time resting and healing for the sake of rest and health rather than as preparation for greater and renewed productivity. I have been learning (the hard way) that how I want to value things and how I actually value things do not always match when it comes to my own behaviour. If I believe (and I do) that every person is inherently valuable, then I must believe that of myself as well (I don’t I’m working on it.) Consequently, I must watch how much I justify my value to myself by tying it to my work, or lack of it.

I am putting a priority on writing.

One of the first things that I did when I discovered I had a brain again was to complete a number of outstanding edits on a paper, brainstorm and flush out a new paper, and, surprising myself, the first notes for a book, which is part of a short series of books, also sprang out of my fingertips onto the page before I had to stop myself from overdoing it (I was too late.)

This was a clear indication to me that writing, something I have done little of outside of academics for the past 25 years, is still very important to me. I have written or edited for at least 10 minutes (often longer) almost every day for the past couple of weeks. I had forgotten how much I love the act of putting words down on paper. Sometimes they’re good words, sometimes they are awful and cliched. But, what I think I enjoy most about them all is that they are, for the brief period of time, my words. And, until I share them with the world, the consequences of these words are only mine. We can spend time together, change, invert, fight, love, and come to rest - all without any consequence or responsibility to anyone else. A tempting place to get lost in, without a doubt, but also a place where I can rest and heal and play. So, more writing of all sorts - academic, personal, fictitious, and frivolous!

Carol Anne’s and my 23rd wedding anniversary is only a couple of weeks away. We were engaged for a little over 2 years before that, meaning that we have well completed our first quarter century together. I am more in love with my wife now than when we got married. I love the marriage we’ve made together. Despite all the challenges, difficulties, struggles, frustrations, set-backs, and disappointments, Carol Anne and I have fun together just by being together - now, still, and always. There is no doubt in my mind that even if I could live life without her, I don’t want to. I think we’ll just keep doing this instead.

Fourty-eight laps around the sun! And, in that time I have contributed to the manifestation of 4 other human beings: Sam, Nathan, Kathleen, and Martin. It is no secret that I had no desire to be a father. Nonetheless, I have found myself to be a father to four remarkable and very different human beings, all of whom are now old enough to vote and to drink in most provinces. I have thought a lot about my kids recently. I’ve been thinking about how much being a father has changed not only what I thought I was going to do with my life, but how I live my life. My perspective, since late 1993, has carried the weight of parenthood. I have been a parent for nearly 30 years, and I cannot remember how I saw the world before that.

Being a parent has made me a better person. But, more than that, learning how to be a parent to my children - both the failures and and the successes - and learning from my children has made my life better. Besides the fact that my kids are interesting, engaging, and kind (no small thing in itself,) my kids continually challenge me to move into the future with them. It is a wonderful feeling to have my children not only want me around, but also want me to share, to some degree, in their world.

Somehow, somewhere among the 4 dozen laps I’ve completed so far I picked up an abiding, stubborn, and persistent belief in humanity. I think we’re worth the effort. I think we are worth the effort because I have seen that we, individually and collectively, can learn. Much of the evidence argues to the contrary - I know! Nonetheless, find myself committed to human beings, and to the learning journey of human beings. And so, whatever the next dozen laps have in store for me, I think I will still be involved in learning; and teaching; and education; and the conscious and deliberate evolution of human learning systems. Some of this will involve writing and publishing. Some of this will involve working directly with learners and teachers. Some of this will involve just being. I’m excited!

If you have made it this far in this indulgent, quasi-reflective post, I hope it was worth it for you. This is the start of me putting words out there into the public world just to put them out there. Thank you for reading them.

Please enjoy the picks of the bandana gang

Chai - pink

Jess - black

Mocha - red

Paddy - blue

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bioerin · 2 years ago

Text

I posted 4,589 times in 2022

60 posts created (1%)

4,529 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@empiria-caterima

@chiqita

@oddishblossom

@str-ngeloop

@inthetags

I tagged 2,004 of my posts in 2022

#yeah - 57 posts

#eurovision - 26 posts

#yes - 20 posts

#cool - 19 posts

#supernatural - 19 posts

#self reblog - 18 posts

#me - 12 posts

#tag game - 12 posts

#ask game - 11 posts

#the phantom of the opera - 10 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#i once told a customer a magnet was 90€ and they just looked at me for a while and i did not get it until they asked 'that expensive' until

My Top Posts in 2022:

Tagged by @frost0wl to tag 9 books I plan to read this year.

I have to admit I don't plan to read them all this year 😬 just plan to read them... sometime...

See the full post

9 notes - Posted January 19, 2022

Trick or treat 👻

Look at Nietzsche asking for pets

(Send me "trick or treat" 👻)

10 notes - Posted October 31, 2022

Tagged by @oddishblossom thank you!! loved your songs!

4 Songs I’ve Had On Repeat Lately:

Pas de Deux by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky

REPRISE by The Lumineers

Migraine by Twenty One Pilots

Es atnācu uguntiņu - Latvian folk song (the song and dance festival version has been playing in my head a lot)

Tagging: @lalalalan @psychicbanana24 @drearywhispers @coldjellyfishsoul @bumblebee-bea and anyone else who wants to

12 notes - Posted February 22, 2022

hey hyehyeyehye!!!!! i'll be going to finland in 3 days i'm super mega exited i'll be visiting mostly the south and the lake area and whie i'll be sure to enjoy the view i wanted to know if you have food recomandation? you are my closest mutual to there so you must have heard of some traditional dishes, i already have my eyes on karjalanpiirakka c:

hiiiiiiii

omg that's so nice!!!! good luck in finland!!!!!!! have been there only once when i was kid and i don't remember much, but only good vibes

the best thing i've eaten that is originally from finland: juustoleipä. i might be saying this just because i'm a cheese enthusiast, but it's a squeaky cheese that honestly does not have a lot of spice, but it's nice in texture and overall feeling.

also idk how familiar you are with rye bread but i also recommend that! i honestly have no idea if it reaches south europe and if you already eat it regularly

you could also try the scandinavian salty liquorice but i personally think that food was invented by the devil and only demons can enjoy eating it lol

as for karjalanpiirakka i have no idea, never tried any! hope it tastes good!

anyway, enjoy your time in finland and i hope you will be able to escape the death heat of summer i imagine italy being!!! (although it will still be hot probably idk)

20 notes - Posted August 12, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Tag People You Wanna Get to Know Better

Tagged by @oddishblossom thank you!! Really liked yours!!!

Relationship Status: single

Song Stuck in My Head: Mamma Mia by ABBA it's because I read a post recently about the movie mamma mia and the song just... emerged

Last Thing You Googled: the try guys (bc i saw a post how they've... fell apart. they did.)

Time: 20:55 at the moment

Dream Trip: I would like to go everywhere starting with Alaska. I just feel like no one would be there and I could just be.

Last Thing You Read: your love is sunlight by doodlebutt. a wangxian au fix-it fic which was just so nice to read

Last Book You Enjoyed Reading: Golden Stage. Huh I really have not read any books since 2020 yikes. Anyway Golden Stage my wonderful enemies to lovers book loved it with my whole heart.

Last Book You Hated Reading: The Girl With Nine Wigs. Got that book as a gift ages ago, and it is probably very bad of me to say I didn't enjoy reading about a girl with cancer based on true events. But I won't lie, I did not like reading it all. The main character tried to be relatable with the reader but I never connected with her, so I guess that was the problem.

Favorite Craft to Do in Your Free Time: does assembling ikea furniture count? I've recently moved and everything in my room is from ikea now. And I even got a little toolbox kit from ikea!! Look at me go! I just have to learn how to make holes in the wall and then I'll be unstoppable.

If that doesn't count I would say creating little trinkets now and then? I don't really have time to do anything, but I like to do stuff like gluing glitter to an old key and putting it up on a wall, or tying something to a string and creating a cat toy, things like that.

Most Niche Dislike: I don't like cut flowers. Of course, if I ever get any, I'm polite and thank people, but overall I just don't like taking a cut flower and putting it in a vase to die.

Opinion on Circuses: The only time I went to circus was the only time I saw my biological father in person. I was eight and it was very, very weird and thus circuses has always been tied to that event in my life and I feel very weird about them. This event is most probably tied with me not liking cut flowers, because before that I had no opinion about them, but then my father came to see me and gave me flowers and I was very, very uncomfortable.

Do You Have Any Sense of Direction: Not really, I am really bad at it. However, after taking a few wrong turns I would find my way anyway. But I know people who are worse than me and cannot even follow google maps, so I'm not that horribly bad.

Woosh this was an interesting tag game that took me places I did not expect to go!

Tagging (no pressure): @empiria-caterima @coldjellyfishsoul @frost0wl @ante--meridiem

21 notes - Posted September 28, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #i read none of the books lol

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agardenofdaydreams · 16 days ago

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I’ve been bedridden since October 25th ever since my chronic hives came back. I’ve been on steroids and the steroids have intensified my migraines, while making me feel nauseous and fatigued. It’s been a miserable few weeks.

I have a dissertation chapter due soon (that I have to defend before my examiners) and I’m so behind due to my current predicament.

I couldn’t get any work done for the last few weeks. Every time I got up and tried, my migraines would flare up, my eyes would get heavy, my head starts pounding, my rash gets worse, and I would have to lie down.

On top of that, I’ve caught a cold last week.

I’m taking countless prescription medication and supplements all throughout the day. Existence has been so heavy and I was beginning to lose hope.

BUT! Today is the first day THIS MONTH that I was actually able to get some work done. Not as much as I hoped (since the rash would make it unwearable and migraines kept flaring up throughout the day) and I had to lie down to take breaks in between. Nonetheless, I was still able to take some chunks out of today to get my work done.

So I guess I’m feeling more hopeful now. I won’t give up. I will endure and be transformed.

you! the person reading this! please tell me one good thing that happened to you today

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2clementines · 11 days ago

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I’ve been trying to be more diligent about writing gratitude lists. I find it easy to live in the worries of “what if” and forget that right in this very moment, around me, many things are pleasant and enjoyable. I’ve started therapy again. During my first appointment I cried and cried. The therapist told me I should get a psychiatric evaluation, “to rule out bipolar and other disorders”. She tasked me with figuring out why I can’t forgive myself over the fact that my sister and I don’t speak anymore. “What is stopping you from accepting it? What do you fear?” (forgiving myself would mean admitting that most things are beyond my control. I fear being completely alone in the world). I haven’t touched alcohol in a month but sometimes I eat weed gummies for my cramps and migraines. I’ve taken my vitamins every single day since the day I tested positive for COVID again (October 22). I should really get a multivitamin instead of 7 or 8 different pills every day. I think they’re working, though, because I haven’t had too many migraines and despite the truly horrific state of the world, I feel just the normal amount of sad and anxious (which is probably more than most people but I haven’t been googling whether or not a fall from 10 stories will kill me). Tonight I made ramen and took a shower and put on a dupe of my favourite perfume and walked myself over to my lover’s café. I got a decaf americano to drink while I read and eat ice cream that’s been in the freezer for about 5 months. Every day I check for news of the bird flu spreading (it is). I try to fight off the despair and go for a walk. Then I write a gratitude list again.

#personal

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fingertipsmp3 · 2 months ago

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I’ve been watching a lot of paranormal documentaries lately and decided to write out all the experiences I’ve had that I can’t adequately explain. Will add a cut because I feel some of these stories could get long, also, if I have theories about what could’ve happened I’ll add them.

First experience: when I was 5 or 6 years old (no older than 6 because we moved out of the house this happened in when I was 6), I was in bed trying to go to sleep when I suddenly heard a lot of voices in my head, overlapping, like someone had put on many radios all tuned to different stations. I don’t remember hearing music and I couldn’t make out any words, although I specifically remember several of the voices sounded angry and were shouting, which really scared me.

I ran to get my mum and tried to explain to her what was happening to me, but the craziest thing about this was, I couldn’t hear myself or her talking. Real sounds that were happening around me were drowned out by the cacophony in my head. My mum tried to comfort me as best she could and came back to my room with me, sitting with me until I fell asleep. I remember the voices continuing for a long period of time, which felt like ages to my child’s mind but was probably no longer than half an hour ultimately. I cried myself to sleep and when I woke up, the voices were gone. They’ve never returned, thank god.

Theories: my mum thinks it was a migraine, but I don’t really get them and have never had auditory hallucinations to this extent while experiencing one. I think it could either have been an auditory hallucination the likes of which I’ve never experienced before or since, or a one-off non-epileptic seizure. (I do experience short auditory hallucinations when I’m about to fall asleep, but they’re never more than 1-2 words or a sequence of music maybe 10 seconds long.) I remember at the time honestly feeling like someone had tuned me in to a frequency where I was hearing the thoughts of every human on earth.

Second experience: My dad died in May 2007. The song All Summer Long by Kid Rock came out in October 2007 on an album, and was released as a single in March 2008. But me and my dad used to listen to this song together in his car no later than the summer of 2004. I don’t have a good explanation for how this came to be. My dad used to drive me to my swimming lessons, which stopped when I was about 8 years old, and I always asked him to play “the Sweet Home Alabama” song. He knew this wasn’t the song by Lynyrd Skynyrd but the song by Kid Rock, because I really liked the lyric “singing Sweet Home Alabama all summer long”.

My dad couldn’t seem to play this song on demand, so I don’t think we had it on tape, but it seems like it was fairly consistently on the radio, because we listened to it at least 3 or 4 times. My dad wasn’t a Kid Rock fan at all, he was a classic rock n’ roll guy; he wouldn’t have owned a Kid Rock album or single. One thing I do find kind of interesting is that listening to this song again, I remember the melody being a bit different, faster, and being sung by a different voice. But it’s a Kid Rock original, not a cover, so I don’t know how that could be.

Theories: All Summer Long is a cover, and the original is lost to time. Or, I’m misremembering, but I swear to god I’m not. My mum asked if we could’ve been hearing Sweet Home Alabama instead, but I was adamant that when my dad put on that song I said “no! Not that one!” So I knew the difference. For me, this is classic Mandela Effect, or a timeslip involving the radio. Maybe even a dimensional thing, I don’t know. I wish someone with a good memory had been in the car with me and my dad, but it was just us.

Third experience: Now this is the one even my card-carrying skeptic mum can’t explain. When I was 13 I was in grief counselling for my dad’s death. My counsellor concluded that a lack of closure, the fact I hadn’t been able to say goodbye, was a pretty big point of agony for me, so he came up with the idea for me and my mum to go to the crematorium where we’d scattered my dad’s ashes and let some balloons go with a message for him. (I know now that balloon releases are a really bad idea for the environment, but I didn’t know that at the time.)

We did it that same day. We didn’t tie a message to the balloons but when I let them go, I thought “I miss you. I love you” or something along those lines. The crematorium has pretty big grounds, not just a memorial garden but a large field and many trees. We’d walked all the way across that field to get to the tree we’d scattered my dad’s ashes near. It was a nice day, the grass was bright green, freshly cut. I mention this because when we turned around to walk back (we’d only been standing at the tree for two minutes or less), the field before us was absolutely blanketed with white feathers. You couldn’t not notice, they were everywhere. It was something neither me nor my mum could explain. How could the feathers have fallen without getting on either of us? How could they have fallen in the first place? We’d have noticed, say, a seagull massacre going on right above our heads. It was like they didn’t fall, they just appeared.

Theories: yeah, I have nothing. My mum said “message received and understood”. I think my dad sent them.

Smaller incidents:

My grandma taught me to knit when I was 10, about a year later, she bought me my own pair of knitting needles, my first pair I wouldn’t be borrowing from her. I was really happy with them and wanted to cast on right away, but when I set them down, they disappeared. Not right before my eyes, but I swear I left the room for about ten seconds to get yarn and they were gone. We tore the house apart looking for them. My grandma has a very small house and she keeps it extremely clean and tidy, yet those needles have never shown up. Not even when the carpeting in the room I lost them in was replaced. I don’t know what happened here. If a house spirit has my 3.5mm navy blue plastic needles, I want them back.

Used to smell my dad’s cigar smoke and aftershave all around my childhood home and occasionally hear his footsteps on the stairs for years after he died. It stopped when I was around 16.

From the ages of 12-13 whenever I was alone in the house I’d hear scratching and banging sounds and footsteps. It terrified me. It was only when I was alone. I genuinely thought I was being targeted by a demon (having recently watched Paranormal Activity probably didn’t help.) When my mum told me the only person associated with our house who’d died was my dad, it all seemed to stop. It was like it stopped because I wasn’t scared of it anymore. It makes me wonder if I somehow created the phenomena with my mind. Teen girl telekinesis?

#i Think this is everything. i almost didn’t include the thing with the noises because i’m half convinced that was a stress based #hallucination at this point considering i Did have a lot going on being a grieving teenager at the time #i remember one specific incident where my mum popped out to buy bread and i immediately braced myself for the noises to begin #and then heard banging coming from the ceiling. and i was alone in the house D:#my point in posting this is just to point out that supernatural experiences go beyond ghost sightings #i’ve never seen a ghost but i’ve had things happen to me that i don’t have a good scientific explanation for #and even if my brain Did create some of this phenomena… the power of the human mind is fascinating #personal #long post #(in case the readmore doesn’t work)

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