#filler ish? it's more for character / world building than anything else

[seromreven]

title: blue velvet | chapter one.

pairings: john lennon/male!reader & paul mccartney/reader | various pairings both including and not including the reader.

summary: it’s the turn of the new decade; you’re the leader of a band that has its residency in a popular nightclub in Hamburg. One fateful night you meet The Beatles, a band new in town, and things take a turn as your relationship with two of the members of the band evolves.

also on ao3!

The punch hit you hard. Square in the eye too. Fuck, did it hurt. It hadn’t been enough to knock you to the floor but you still found yourself clinging to the wooden tabletop of the bar with one hand while the other had gone straight to your eye. To cover it or… something, you didn’t know. It had been pure reflex.

Fortunately, it was the only punch you got. And as you still had no plans on fighting; you did no such endeavour on punching back. God but did the stinging pain in your eye wish you weren’t such a pacifist.

You muttered an array of curses as you tried to get back up, a hard thing to do as you saw stars and weird circles float and flutter all around you. A beautiful, painful distraction. Your steps wavered and you felt a thin hand wrap around your arm in an attempt to help you up.

You looked up and saw an incredibly young looking man. Or just a boy. Looked a lot like one of The Beatles from earlier. Hell, you were just hit by one so this one might as well be one too. But why was he helping you then? You were carefully positioned on a barstool and sighed as someone handed you a cold object. A beer can you realised and looked up to your young helper.

“...For your eye. We don’t have any ice,” he sounded… remorseful and you slowly nodded and placed it over your eye with a wince as the cooled surface hit the heated swelling. You found yourself unable to look anywhere but on your helper, probably due to an incoming cramp or some shit from the fall, and decided to make some small talk before the silence got awkward.

“So… what’s your name, pal?” You asked the kid.

“Uh, George,” he seemed nervous which could be from multiple reasons you supposed.

You nodded and looked him over now that he was so close.

His dark hair was wild from the hair products giving up after a long day and was matched with thick dark eyebrows. His ears protruded noticeably away from his head; an adorable look which only served to remind you of Dumbo. A thought of which you lowly snickered at.

“You okay?” He asked with furrowed brows. Hopefully because of concern and not because he had noticed your staring and snickering. Him, hopefully, not being a mind reader couldn’t have known you just compared him to a cartoon elephant.

You shrugged, “I’ve had worse.”

That wasn’t a lie. And anyhow; the pain and warm stinging were slowly letting up. And, hey, you would have a can of beer once it was done. It would be at room temperature but, whatever.

You turned your head with a loud crack coming from your neck. You winced but moved on. Your assaulter had vanished and as you looked at the spot of where he had been; babyface suddenly appeared. He introduced himself as Paul. Which made more sense than what you had been beginning to call him.

“I’m really sorry about John,” you lightly shook your head at him as he began in a way to tell him not to be as he continued, “he had been in a fight with Stu earlier and I suppose he was still tense, y’know.”

“Who the fuck is Stu?”

Geez, the guy is cute and all but what’s with the familiarity? Were you supposed to know this Stu guy? You narrowed your eyes at the guy.

“Oh… right,” Paul muttered and glanced at George next to you. He decided to explain instead of this Paul guy who did seem a little jittery. “He’s our bassist,” Paul nodded at what George had said. Right, as if you could’ve known that.

“Is there much infighting in your band?” You said hoping it would come off as something lighthearted rather than a genuine quest. Not that you had conveyed that any well in your question. You shrugged to yourself and looked around, finally taking in the area around you. The people around the bar had dispersed. They probably moved away from expecting a brawl but at the disappointment of the lack of it; just proceeded to stay away from the mess. You saw the bartender looking rather unfaced and unimpressed. Fair enough.

Paul shook his head with a small laugh. “Not really, no.” Though George shot in with a, “well, kinda.” You looked to and from them with a raised eyebrow. “... Anyway,” you sighed and stood up with a hand steadying yourself on the bar.

You cracked open the beer now that your eye felt much better. Most of the pain would probably first really hit you tomorrow anyway. You let out a contented sigh as finished your sip and looked at Paul and George, both staring at you. They seemed… puzzled. Perhaps at your lack of rage from having been… y’know, punched. But, really? What good would that do? It wasn’t like that John fellow was around anyway.

You placed the can on the bar and wiped your damp hand on your trousers. “I realise I never introduced myself,” you reached out a hand to Paul, “I’m [first name].” You shook hands. It was surprisingly soft.

Paul’s eyes were wide as he asked, “... [Last name]?”

You blinked, taken aback by his knowledge. He knew who you were? … What?

“How d’you…?” You still had a hold on his hand, though he seemed as willing as you to let go. He smiled, rather charmingly, with a small laugh. “I’m… We’re,” he glanced to George, “fans of your band... The Eight Wonder!” He finally let go and you kinda missed the touch as you flexed the hand as it came back to your side.

“You’re great!” Oh, now you were going to blush, weren’t you?. Not only had he heard of you, but he liked it? You shouldn’t really be all too surprised. You were doing well. But Paul and his friends didn’t exactly… fit the crowd that were regular at the club you played at. It was a very bougie place.

“We heard you play at The Bunker back when we first got to Hamburg. It was great!” Paul continued added praises and out of the corner of your eye, you could see that George nodding along. You hadn’t recognised them. So it was either a long time ago or you simply didn’t notice three… five? leather-clad young men.

“Well,” you shallowed harshly as you felt your face getting warmer, “I’m glad to hear that.” You glanced shortly at your feet; not every day you get praised. Especially not from cute men. Lucky you. You moved slightly at your feet and looked at Paul again, hopefully not feeling so bashful.

“We play at Der Palast Des Beethoven now. Have been for the last few months… I would invite you to come and see us but… well, it’s got a strict dress code and the guests there can be rather… stuck up. Entry is expensive but,” you laughed, “it pays well too!” You had really lucked out in securing a gig there… Or, well, your manager had. Ernst Scherer. Weird dude but great at his job. You took your, almost, forgotten beer to your mouth to hide your rather smug smirk that was forming.

“Hey!” You quickly wiped your mouth. “You could come through the backdoor and be in the green room!” You nodded to yourself at that. You wanted to thank them somehow. Most would’ve just gone after their friend or, y’know, beaten you along with him.

“You can take the John guy with you too, if he feels like it,” you took another sip. Paul smiled though looked a little confused; so did George.

“But… he hit you,” George looked at you with furrowed brows and glanced to his friends. You shrugged.

“Yeah, but he’s your friend and yet you helped me instead of running after him or… worse,” where were you going with this… um, “so you don’t seem all too bad, and I can always do with more friends. And, don’t worry, I’m not planning an ambush,” you laughed and patted George on his shoulder. He laughed, nervously, but still- laughed.

“No, but,” you licked your lips slightly, tasting the bitter taste of your canned lager, “‘suppose I just wanted to thank you in some way. And I,” you pointed slightly to the stage, ”I did really enjoy your set.”

Paul laughed and got closer to you to pat you on your bicep. His touch was soft and warm. Well, this boy seemed to have to qualms about showing how he felt, eh? You too stepped closer and looked at him with heavy eyes.

George coughed, awkwardly for sure, and you remembered his presence and snickered with a pitying glance to his direction. “Anyway,” you scratched your neck slightly and glanced away from the young men. You hated that you had to cut this short but you really had to go.

“You’re welcome to come whenever you have the time. But, now, I really should be going.”

You patted George gently on his shoulder as you said your goodbyes and hurried out of the bar. It was nearing the early morning and the air chill, forcing you to embrace your coat close to you as you worked down the empty streets back home.

[caps-lockdown]

Sweater Weather Part Four

SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG GUYS! If I’m being honest I fell out of love with this part pretty quick, and most of it is a filler chapter. There’s some flashbacks for the sake of plot, just FYI. Anyway I hope you all enjoy it!

Also I realize that some of the flashbacks may not completely add up to the actual timeline of films, so just ignore that. Thanks. 

Pairings: Steve Rogers x PottsRelativeFem!Reader

Ratings/Warnings: R 

For everything from language, crude jokes, ADULT situations/impure thoughts, booze (because it’s pretty much a staple in my fics at this point.), arguments, and an extremely overprotective Tony Stark. Very little angst, as I try to keep most of my fics light humored. But of course there are some insecurities/unsure feelings, as well as sad feels from everything with endgame/ the decimation. Also dead parents.

Also AU in the fact NO ONE DIED during Endgame/Steve didn’t go back. Also as much as I adore Morgan Stark, she isn’t around yet. I didn’t know where this would fit timeline wise, so just ignore the timeline. Kay? Cool.

Words: 5,442 (Ish)

Summary: You’ve just moved to New York after a long 3 year stint travelling the world and helping with various charities, taking a new job with Stark Industries thanks to your cousin Pepper. A trip out to surprise Tony and The Avengers for the weekend turns from good to terrible when the a/c at the compound breaks. How will you beat the heat for the record breaking weekend?

It’s in Y/N Y/L/N format, any pictures, outfits, gifs, and marvel characters just assume I don’t own them. Also no Beta, as I don’t ever have one, so the mistakes and reader are all my own. Enjoy!

Part Four

To say that dinner was awkward was the biggest understatement of the century.

Everyone sat at the table in silence, barely making eye contact with anyone else, the sound of scraping utensils and the nervous clearing of throats the only noises passing the time. You picked at your food, zoned out and trying not to acknowledge Tony’s sulking figure at the end of the table. True to your word you sat next to Steve, thankful for his large hand on your thigh and occasionally giving you a comforting squeeze. Or drawing circles on your knee to help keep you grounded, which you appreciated more than words could convey.

All of you had finished eating when Pepper decided to find her voice, setting her fork down with a large clang that made you jump.

“Alright. It’s been an hour and I’m sick of it. This silence is stupid. This whole fight between Y/N and Tony is stupid. I would kill both of you if I didn’t have so many witnesses here right now. So can we please try to find a way to get you two to freaking apologize? I didn’t keep you coming back a secret for nearly six months for nothing Y/N.” Your gaze became hazy at your cousin’s firm tone, feeling childish for how you had acted earlier.

“And you!” She glared at her husband, who already was appearing to feel two feet tall at the present, “Y/N isn’t even back for twenty four hours and you have to feel obligated to shove your way into her personal life?! She is an adult, who she decides to spend her time with is her business. Not yours. Her mother was suffocating enough when she was alive, she doesn’t need you to fill those shoes.”

“I’d pay to see Stark in heels.” Sam’s quip had you chuckling, remembering the sky scraper height of some of your mom’s footwear.

“I wouldn’t last twenty minutes in those things.” Tony’s quiet voice snapped your eyes to him, and you saw first hand how guilty he was truly feeling about the whole ordeal. “Pep’s right. Y/N I am sorry for how I acted earlier. You are an adult and even though I may not like the idea of you and…Steve” He said his teammate’s name almost painfully, swallowing a large gulp of his wine and staring at the two of you, “You’re both truly wonderful people and I won’t say I told you so if it goes down in flames. I love you short stack, I just want you to be happy.”

“Thanks Snark. I tolerate you for Pepper’s sake, and I will accept your apology only because we’re related. Also because I’m tired of seeing you look like someone burned down your lab with all of your suits locked in it.” Watching his face break into a small grin forced you to do the same, everyone clapping at the two of you morons and getting up to clear the table.

“So what’s the plan for the evening? It’s too hot to do anything strenuous.” Sam commented, the dishes cleaned and put away. Pepper had to sit on you in a chair to keep you from helping this time. Surveying the living room your mind began to work, your earlier activities with the air cooling inventions coming to mind.

“How about we move all of the fans and coolers into this room? It’s pretty much secluded and we can hang a couple tarps from outside on the doorways to help keep the air in? We can play a drinking game? Didn’t you say you had some of your mead with you Thor?” The blonde nodded as the rest of the group looked at you with astonished faces, Bucky coming to grasp your hands in admiration.

“If Rogers here is ever dumb enough to mess things up with you, know that I will make his life a living hell for losing someone so damn smart. Seriously, your amazing brain got a sister or somethin?” You giggled as Steve rolled his eyes at his friend, Sam and Thor leaving to grab the aforementioned tarps from outside.

“Watch it Barnes.” Your pulse lurched as the blonde nearly growled at his best friend, the brunette tossing a cheeky wink over his shoulder at him.

“What you gonna do Punk? Throw me into another wall?”

“SO THAT’S WHY THERE’S A DENT IN MY HALLWAY?!” You burst into laughter as Tony stared at the two men, hands on his hips and looking nothing short of annoyed. Bucky and Steve had the decency to avoid his gaze, muttering ‘sorry’s as the two men returned, making short work of duct taping shut one of the entrances to the room, you giving a thumbs up in approval. It’s like they had read your mind. All of you then returned to your rooms to grab your cooler and fans, well you only replaced the ice in yours. No way were you going to drag your giant chest all the way down the hallway. It had taken all of your strength just to dump out the cold water outside your low window. Yes you could ask one of the men to help you, but if you were being honest you didn’t want them to notice, not when your room was an easy twenty degrees cooler than the rest of the compound. Screw that. They were super heroes, you could have this one thing.

“Alright so what game we playing?” Bruce questioned after you had played “musical furniture” to help block the one doorway to help cease air flow on the one side, fans and coolers surrounding the room in a circular fashion, constantly circulating air in different directions. It was already feeling better by the minute, most of you pulling chairs to avoid sitting on the warm couches and love seats.

“I figured “Never have I ever”? We haven’t played that one since the wedding. We have a few years to make up for.” You shrugged, Tony agreeing with a loud “Hell yea!” that threatened to blow your eardrums out. You all made your drinks from the copious amounts of booze Stark and Pepper had brought from their stash in their suite, making a mental note to ask them about it later. They really should invest in building a bar in this place. Taking a seat next in between Sam and Nat, you smiled at Steve and Bruce across from you. Thor threw himself into a chair next to Bruce and Nat, Pepper was gladly the buffer between Tony and Steve. Bucky finished out the circle on Sam’s left putting him next to Tony. You should have known they’d be sitting next to each other, you were gathering that they were the duo of the group. Not that it bothered you.

“Alright as it is my building I’ll start us off.” Tony jumped on the claim to go first, all of you not even putting up a fight, eager to get to drinking this hot and sticky weekend away. “Never have I ever kissed a man.”

“Low blow honey.” You smiled as Pepper jabbed her husband in the ribs while taking a drink, you and Nat following suit. Everyone’s eyebrows raised to their hairlines as Sam took a drink from his glass.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“We don’t want to know. My turn?” Pepper chuckled, looking at you with a smile. “Never have I ever gotten a speeding ticket.” You drank.

Steve raised an eyebrow at you, you shrugging as he thought of something to say.  “Never have I ever shaved my legs.” The chorus of laughter rang loudly at Tony taking a drink with you ladies.

“Never have I ever had a hangover.” Bruce admitted, you staring at the large man bewildered as to how he could live through one of Tony’s parties.

“Alright, ahem never have I ever flown with the help of a suit.” Thor grinned as the respective men (and Pepper) took drinks from their glasses.

The game continued on, you finding out really fast that no one was wasting time holding back punches, the hours ticked by and before you could comprehend it you were mixing your fifth drink of the evening. The alcohol was making you sway to music that wasn’t being played anywhere but in your head as you crashed back into your chair, Nat leaning herself onto you for support as she took off her shoes. The group was well on their way to being properly sloshed, Tony and Pepper laughing at nothing with Sam and Bucky while Bruce and Thor went to move to the floor. All eyes moved to you as you waved your free hand in the air, trying to stay balanced on your seat.

“Ok my turn! Never have I ever saved the world!” Your words slurred, everyone groaning as you beamed at them, watching Steve finish his third glass of mead and a very pleased looking Thor refilling it without being asked.

“Alright Y/N.” Sam began, you lazily side eyeing him as he smirked. “Never have I ever kissed Steve Rogers.” You stared blankly into his brown eyes, missing Nat sneak a drink from her glass, the mentioned blonde man starting to develop a slight pink tint to his cheeks. “Seriously? I thought for sure you guys would have been playing tonsil hockey by now!”

“No we haven’t.” You said a little too quickly, heat rising to your face. “I would definitely know if we had. I have a feeling that kissing Rogers isn’t something a girl would ever forget.” Your voice was loud and you clapped a hand over your mouth, but the damage had been done. You tried not to look at Steve, his wide smirk making you want to drink yourself into a coma.

“Oh please don’t bring that up. I don’t want that in my head…too late it’s in my head now. Fucking thanks.” Tony wiped his face with exasperation, you snorting as Bucky went on to say he’s never been skinny dipping. You took a drink at that, the guys whooping and hollering and asking for the story of how that happened.

“Highschool. Cheerleaders…dared some of us band geeks to do it during senior day. They stole our clothes while we were in the lake, so we had to call our parents. My mom lectured my ass for two hours when she showed up.” You were in a fit of giggles by the time you finished, Pepper joining in as you fell off your chair and onto the floor, Steve looking concerned for a split second until you erupted into more giggles.

“I think Y/N’s cut off for the night.” Sam mentioned, you bringing your face into a small pout before giving up within a few seconds to giggle again. Your body was buzzing from all of the liquor, and you knew you had to stop before you made a giant idiot out of yourself.

“Shaddup Sam, I’mma be fine.” Yea that was you stopping.

“Never have I ever had sex!” Tony exclaimed, the attention being taken from you to look at the obviously drunk billionaire. “I just wanted to take a drink, I’m totally lying.”

“Ya don’t say?” You cast a knowing look to Pepper that made her duck her head down, taking a rather long draw from whatever concoction Tony had made her.

“Guys…guys it’s…it’s two in the morning. Holy shit. “ Bruce looked at his wrist watch in shock. Time had flown by and though you were having an amazing time, sleep was going to start claiming victims before too much longer. You steadied your wobbly legs as you stood up from the floor, holding onto your vacant chair for dear life as the room started spinning.

“I’m going to go the bathroom.” Steve said rather loudly, jumping up to his feet and downing the contents in his cup before walking out of the room. You smiled drunkenly at all of your friends, giving them a mock salute with the hand that wasn’t still grasping the metal frame of your seat.

“I think that’s my cue to get some sleep. Night all.” You waved, confident you could make it back to your room without any incident as you stepped away from them with ease. It was going great until you managed to trip on a fan cord, thankful Thor had been nearly right behind you and managed to catch you from eating the carpet.

“Let’s get you to the safety of your bed before you hurt yourself.” His deep voice jolted you from slipping into sleep standing up, managing a lopside smile with a short nod. You allowed the god of lightning to walk you carefully to your room, letting him tuck you into your bed and placing your phone on your nightstand, making sure it was plugged into the charger. You reached out to grip one of his massive arms, a warm smile on your lips.

“Thanks….Thor. You’re the…the best.” You mumbled as he patted your head affectionately, you falling asleep as soon as he flipped the light switch.

“Y/N pass out?” Steve asked when the blonde returned to the group, everyone deciding that they would sleep in the living room where all the cool air was.

“Yes she is most certainly asleep. I’d wager she could sleep through an entire alien invasion with how much she’s consumed tonight.” Thor laughed, Steve looking happy to hear you had no trouble slipping off into dream land. “Luckily her room is like an ice box.”

“You gonna go keep her warm Agent Smolder?” Bucky joked. “Am I going to have to stay up and make sure you don’t go and sneak off into her room later?”

“LA LA LA I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT!” Tony interrupted Steve’s next words, covering his ears in a poor attempt to shield himself from having to take in the conversation. They watched with amusement as the man shoved one of the couch pillows over his head as he and Pepper got comfortable, Nat taking the loveseat and stretching out.

“Guess that leaves us the floor then huh Buck?” Steve sighed, eyes rolling as Sam loudly began snoring from his passed out position on the last small couch in the room. Bruce had taken the large recliner Tony had built for him, and Thor was slumped against the far wall, slowly drifting off, his stein still half full of mead.

“Looks like it Captain Cutie!”

“When will you stop with those stupid code names?”

“When you finally ask Y/N out. Or make some kind of move! You waiting on the leaves to change colors or something?” The brunette shoved at his friend’s large shoulder before laying down on the ground, reaching to take off his shirt and throw it to the side. “A dame that looks like that will have guys beating down her door once she gets settled. You better not let them get that chance, not when I’ve seen the way she looks at you.”

“Goodnight Bucky.” Steve muttered, turning away from his friend after removing his own shirt and placing it next to the pillow Nat had thrown him.

“Goodnight Stevie.” The brunette cooed, both of them slowly succumbing to tipsy slumber.

~~~~A couple hours later~~~~

Steve’s bloodshot eyes shot open at the inescapably deafening snores that ripped through the living room in the wee hours of the morning. He sat up with a soft moan of discomfort, deciding that he would rather roast alive than have to listen to this for another moment longer. His gaze wandered to the empty loveseat, knowing full well Nat had gotten sick of the blaring assault on her ears as well. He stumbled slightly towards the hallway, remembering his shirt when he entered it. He waved it off and began his trek down the hall. He’d get it in the morning. Coming up to his room he jiggled the handle to find it wouldn’t budge.

“Friday…my door won’t open.” He went to shove at the door, the outcome the same as before.

“Captain Rogers that’s because it’s not….”

“Open my damn door Friday I want some sleep!” The blonde huffed at the AI, jiggling the handle again like a child. He was drunk, tired, and did not have time for this.

“Language Captain. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

The door opened and Steve not too gracefully stumbled in, immediately noticing how much colder it was in his room when it shut. Huh, he was certain he had taken his fan Y/N made him into the living room. Maybe she had made him another one and managed to get it in there earlier in the evening. Yes that had to be it. He could hear it circulating now, the cool breeze floating through the air as he made his way deeper into the darkness.

“Damn!” The curse fell out of his lips as he stubbed his toe on what he was assuming was his dresser, which had magically shrunk in height. Weird. He ran a hand through his hair as he sat on the edge of the bed. It was right where he left it at least, in the middle of the room. His mind wandered to you, how nice you had been to make him another cooling unit for his room. You were so selfless and kind, always helping others before yourself. It was remarkable really. You had lit such a fire within him too, and he had to stop himself multiple times this weekend from doing exactly as Bucky had suggested and shoving you up against the wall and making you forget your own name. He had it bad, but then again he always had. You just weren’t someone he ever thought he deserved before.

Flashback, May 8th 2012

“Well that was a total bust.” Steve’s heart stopped temporarily as he felt you slump into the couch next to him, you taking out pins that were holding up your fancy updo with contempt.

“That bad huh?” He asked, trying to ignore the fire dancing in his veins as your arms brushed against each other in your hastened attempt at tearing your jewelry off.

“All he wanted to talk about was his ex-girlfriend! I left before dessert. I was really looking forward to that stupid cheesecake.” You muttered angrily, running your hands through your hair. The battle of New York had set you on edge, not wanting to be alone the next time the world decided to have a crisis and trying your hand at dating. Steve was silently extremely happy it hadn’t worked out. Mostly because he didn’t want to see you with anyone besides him. Just thinking about…what was his name again…made his blood boil.

“Didn’t he have a weird name?” He allowed his arm to drape behind you on the couch as you scooted closer to him, taking the remote and popcorn from the coffee table and flipping the channel. Steve hadn’t been watching it anyway, the only reason he was even awake was because of you. He hated admitting it, even to himself but the thought of you out having a good time, laughing at some other man’s jokes, or god forbid flirting with him had given the Captain a rather unhealthy case of insomnia leading up to the date. And they had just saved the world from Loki.

“Kelly. From work. This is why I don’t date coworkers.” You sighed with another shake of your head, deciding on Princess Bride that was halfway through its broadcast. His breath hitched as you snuggled into his side, the two of you laughing away your sour mood. He loved your laugh, how musical it was. Actually he didn’t think there was anything he didn’t love about you, even if he hadn’t known you a long time. You had only moved here a few months ago, your parents passing away in a car accident and leaving you extremely lost. Pepper of course took you in, and you got on with Steve like gas on a fire.

“Thanks for being here Rogers. I know you don’t have to be and I’m sure you could use the sleep since you just saved the world and all. I don’t deserve you.”

“Don’t mention it Doll. Glad to help. Just don’t wake me up if I fall asleep.” His heart soared as you gave him a bright smile.

“Then don’t snore.”

The two of you fell asleep together on the couch before the end credits played, you cuddling into his side and his arm draped around you.

November 2015

“I swear to god Tony you ever pull a stunt like that again and I will murder you!”

“I was just trying to help!” The brunette man snapped, Steve chuckling from the dining room table as he watched you and Pepper try to wave away the giant mushroom cloud that was emitting from the stove. The smoke detectors blared viciously as Thanksgiving was proving to be a disaster at the Tower. It hadn’t been too long ago since they had defeated Ultron, the team deciding that they would try to have a giant Thanksgiving day meal to reconnect with each other. Truth be told he had been looking forward to seeing you the most, your new article writing job taking up most of your time as of late. He didn’t mind, he was super happy for you pursuing your dreams. Your bubbly personality made you tons of friends in college, and people weren’t wrong to love you at your new job too.

“THEN STAY OUT OF THE DAMN KITCHEN!” Both of you yelled in union, pushing the older man out of the room and into the dining area, Steve shaking his head as Tony attempted to look hurt. He didn’t take long to snap out of it, helping the Captain with setting the table. Sam and Nat were soon to enter, each carrying a dish of some sort. Clint had chosen to stay with his own family for the holidays, and after everyone had met them, the blonde avenger could understand why. He wished he would one day have a family like that, especially after seeing Peggy again. You of course were being super wonderful about the whole situation, offering to get coffee with him after he would see her, just to listen to him talk about a woman who wasn’t you. You always felt just a bit jealous at how his face would light up as he recalled one of her good days, and how much it hurt to see him after one of her bad days. You couldn’t pinpoint why you felt that way, you just did. You and Steve had only grown closer as the years had gone by, but it had become pretty clear to you that he only saw you as a friend.

Friends always responded to your S.O.S texts about Tony like he did. Even now as you entered the dining area carrying the only slightly scorched turkey to the table, he was the perfect friend and immediately reached to help you. He followed that movement with pulling out a chair next to him for you and passing you a glass of your favorite white wine that not even Tony or Pepper had remembered to grab. Friends do that.

“This looks amazing Doll, you and Pepper always knock it out of the park. I’ve missed you.” You flashed him a prideful smile as he set his large hand over yours, giving it a slight squeeze. “Missed seeing that smile too.”

Yeah. Friends.

2016

Peggy Carter’s funeral had been over for nearly two hours by the time Steve finally took a moment to check his phone. His eyes were burning from the tears that had fallen during the course of the day, and for once he wasn’t sorry that he had ignored everyone’s attempts at getting a hold of him. That was, until he saw he had a text message from you. Navigating the notification window on his phone with shaking hands he brought up the communication window, pressing the download button on your conversation bubble and waiting for it to load. He was always amazed at how fast modern technology was, the large sum of words popping up within a small fraction of time, his eyes squinting slightly through the pain and reading what you had sent.

“Hey Cap. I know I can’t be there today with you, and I want you to know how much that is killing me. Nat and Tony have filled me in with everything going on, and I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am. About everything.” Steve scoffed at you mentioning Stark, the terms of which he and the other avenger had left things a few days ago were less than friendly. This entire accords situation was absurd, at least in his eyes, and he couldn’t wait for your cousin in law to get his head out of his ass. He wasn’t so sure that would ever happen though.“I know you will never ask me to pick a side, and Snark has been smart enough not to ask either. I don’t know all of the details but I do know neither of you can ask me to choose one of you over the other. Not that you would. You’re one of the best people in my life, and I’ll personally be super happy when all of this blows over and I can see you again. Tony pretty much has me under lock and key here, even Pepper is getting sick of it. In case things go sideways, which it’s looking pretty damn likely with my dumb ass cousin involved, please know that I’m here should you need me. I’m and phone call away and you know where I live. If I’m not there you know about the gnome. Anytime. No questions asked. Stay safe for me Steve, Y/N” He would never take you up on that offer, things turning from bad to worse really quick for The Avengers. He never did get to tell you how sorry he was for not responding to your text, or tell you how much it meant to him.

2020

The room was noisy and filled with happy drunk people celebrating the union of Pepper and Tony Stark. You stood in your simple light blue dress, looking on at the simple affair with thankful eyes. They had gotten lucky with the Decimation, still managing to have each other after everything. Your heart ached for Clint and Steve, knowing they had lost the ones who mattered most to them, and you were exceptionally thankful you still had your cousin, well now cousins.

You hadn’t seen much of Steve since the snap, and had heard from him even less. Not that you held that over him, you knew him and Tony still weren’t on good terms, and you couldn’t blame him for staying away. Still, you had wished you would have gotten to see him before you left.

“Hey Short Stack look who made it!” You moved to look at Tony, who was holding a very stunning Natasha in his arms, your smile reaching your eyes as you went to hug her tightly. Most of the team had gone their separate ways when they failed to defeat Thanos, so you were more than elated to see your other favorite red head on your last night in town.

“Heya Nat! I’m so glad you could be here!”

“Of course Y/N. I wouldn’t miss your send off, and the free drinks. Congrats you two.” You laughed as she wasted no time taking a champagne flute off of a passing tray, taking a long sip and linking arms with you as the newlyweds were dragged away again. “Have you heard from Rogers?”

“No, should I have?” Your eyes narrowed in question while Natasha shook her head in annoyance.

“That man. I told him to reach out before you left us. I literally just told him today when I saw him at the meeting! I know he really does miss you Y/N.”

“He has a funny way of showing it Nat. Don’t sweat it, you tried.” Patting your friend on the shoulder you took your phone out of your clutch, seeing Kate had texted you to remind you about the drink plans you had made for tomorrow on the way to the airport before you caught your flight to London. Nothing from Steve. “How about a picture? You look amazing and I need some more photos on this new phone to keep me company while I’m gone!” She agreed and you quickly flipped your camera app open, capturing a few last moments with your friends and family. The rest of the night was a blur as you danced and drank, looking forward to whatever your future would bring.

The next day at the airport was hard. You were thankful you hadn’t worn an ounce of makeup, crying easily as Kate, Tony, Pepper, and Nat all said their goodbyes to you. You had watched them pull away from the drop off curb with blurred vision, your heart breaking at the acknowledgment that you were really leaving. Off to help various countries with varying charities. It was the least you could do during this awful time in the world.

“Y/N!” You turned your head slowly, your breath being sucked out of you as you recognized the familiar head of blonde hair and gorgeous blue eyes moving for you in the crowd. You hoisted your backpack higher onto your shoulder, nerves getting better at you as you tried to offer a small smile. You hadn’t seen him in months and he still managed to have this effect on you. Willing yourself to pull yourself together you bit back a laugh as he almost looked winded, reaching your standing figure with slightly labored breathing. “I had to see off my best girl.”

“Please. I haven’t been your best girl in years Steve. But I appreciate it all the same.” You smiled, your heart breaking as he looked down at the pavement shyly.

“Listen about that…”

You were quick to cut him off, “Don’t worry about it Cap. You did what you had to do, and you’ve been through a lot over the years. No hard feelings.” Your voice was flat, and he grimaced at the tone of indifference. He was literally screaming at himself, internally demanding that he just man up and kiss you. Tell you how sorry he was for everything, how you were, are still the most amazing person in his life and how he wants to start over. Beg for your forgiveness and promise to take care of you. Anything to stop you from getting on that plane and disappearing from his life for who knows how long. “I should get going, customs is going to be a drag.”

“Right. Well have a good flight. Don’t stay away too long.” He’d kick himself for the rest of his days, seeing you give him one of your giant smiles, although he could tell you didn’t fully mean it, and step towards him to initiate an awkward hug. It felt rushed and forced, but he would be lying if he hadn’t wanted it to last longer than a few seconds, missing the way your body would just melt into his just like they did in days of old.

“I’ll miss you most of all.” His ears perked up at your small admission, the sentence being no louder than a careful whisper, watching you blink back tears and grip onto the shoulder of your bag tightly. He’d miss you more, knowing full well part of his heart was getting on that plane with you. But he said nothing, just smiled and gave a small wave to your retreating figure, watching you until you were completely out of his line of sight. You hadn’t looked back once, but the tears that clung to the corners of his eyes made him partially glad you hadn’t.

~~~Now~~~

The memories faded and Steve wiped at his eyes sleepily, the mead Thor had given him proving more potent than he had remembered, his body falling hard onto the side of the bed. It had made a noise that had almost sounded like a sigh, the man shaking his head in drunken disbelief. How crazy would that be? A bed can’t sound like a person. He stayed on his side, staring into the darkness as it began to swallow him.

The last thing that went through his mind before he fell asleep was how much his pillow smelled like you.

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