#explodes and dies i am never recovering from this

[lovebugism]

Spoooooky request, what if the gang went to a haunted house and everyone made fun of reader for being scared, but Steve holds her hand and walks with her 👻

thanks for requesting angel! i switched it up a bit and did a sort of second part to this fic! you def don't have to read it but it'll give some context :D — you're still getting used to the world post-vecna, but it's easier with steve holding your hand

fictober (㇏(•̀ᵥᵥ•́)ノ)

The haunted house off Fifth Street looks strangely familiar. Two stories, faded cornflower paint job, boarded up windows. It looks like a dollhouse from hell. It looks like the goddamn Creel House. It’s like some kind of sick joke.

It didn’t take Hawkins very long to recover from last spring. Mostly because it was just an earthquake to everyone else. No one died, nothing was ruined beyond repair. To the rest of the town, it was just a minor natural disaster — an inconvenience more than anything.

No one knows that a thirteen-year-old girl killed the monster trying to end the world. No one knows that the local freak nearly died saving a bunch of teenagers. No one knows that one song, one heavy metal guitar, and one good memory just narrowly saved your life. 

It’s secrets all of you are gonna have to keep for the rest of your lives. It weighs you down accordingly.

“Am I crazy, or is that…?” Robin trails off, freckled chin tilted towards the velvet blue sky as she gapes at the artificially rotted house. It glows a sickly green color on the outside. The windows light up red every now and then, in time with the screams echoing from the upper story.

“Yeah,” Nancy answers, breathless and equally dumbfounded. “I think it is.”

A beat of silence falls over the group of you. It doesn’t feel so heavy with the surrounding chatter. The crowd continues to bustle around you on the street, falling over themselves with laughter and lingering fright. They have no idea the ghost story they grew up with nearly destroyed the world.

The bitter realization makes your chest ache. Steve seemingly understands this and gives your hand a reassuring squeeze. You wonder if he can feel the way you tremble.

Eddie scoffs a cynical laugh from the other side of you. A pink, sadistic grin tugs at his lips, almost as wild as his curls billowing in the autumn breeze. “It’s basically kismet then, huh?”

Steve shoots the boy a half-hearted glare, then deflates because he realizes he can’t really be mad about it. Those damn demobats might’ve taken a pound of flesh from his stomach, but it’s nowhere near the feast they made out of Munson.

“C’mon on, dude,” he murmurs quietly with a subtle nod down at you.

“What?” Eddie snorts. “If I don’t laugh bout it, I’ll start crying, so… Take your pick, man.”

Steve wants to tell him that there’s no shame in crying. That he’s done it plenty of times since the fall of ’84. He’s cried for you, for himself, for the kids who will never get to be kids again. He figures it’s better than letting it all build up until you damn near explode. 

But now’s probably not the best time for that talk. Or any time, really. He’ll get you to get all serious and sappy with Eddie about that another time, just like you did for him.

“I’m gonna, uh— I’m gonna go get the tickets,” Jonathan murmurs with his usual Byers mumblings. 

He wasn’t around for the whole Vecna ordeal — just the weird shit in California and the secret lair thing in Nevada. He feels like he can be a bit braver about the whole thing for the four of you.

Nancy brushes a kiss to the boy’s cheek before he leaves. She does that a lot now, with Jonathan and all the rest of you. She always feels like she needs to say a proper goodbye and I love you whenever someone leaves. Just in case the world decides to end again.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” Steve mutters to you, gaze twinkling with sincerity but stern still. “You know that, right?”

He knows that you know, but he feels the need to say it anyway. Mostly because he knows you were already scared of most things before everything went to shit. You’ve always been delicate, tender, like an open wound. Now, you can’t step outside without shaking. You’re always shuddering with the distant fear that the curse might return and no one will be there to save you.

Steve knows this, too. That’s why he holds so ardently to your trembling hand. It’s a silent reminder that he’s there, that he won’t let anything happen to you again, that he’ll always be around to save you when you need him.

“Oh, my god,” Robin groans, eyes wide and head tilted back. “Leave her alone, Steve! She’s fine!”

You know she’s just trying to be supportive. She thinks Steve’s coddling you because you’re quiet — that he’s sticking up for you because he thinks you can’t stick up for yourself. 

He is. And you can’t. But still, she’s only trying to help.

Steve looks to his left to glare at her. They seem to communicate telepathically for a moment. His eyes soften again when he turns back to you. His deep cinnamon gaze swims with a honeyed concern, a silent “Are you fine?”

You nod. “I’m okay,” you tell him, mustering a soft smile that wavers at the edges.

He doesn’t believe you, not completely, but he doesn’t press it any further.

Jonathan returns with the ticket stubs. They’re black and blood red. You take the one he gives you with hesitant, clammy hands. He seems to notice how terrified you are without you having to say a single goddamn word.

“I’m not a huge fan of these things either,” he confesses with a thin-lipped smile. A light-hearted way of telling you that you’re not alone in the fear you keep hidden (very poorly hidden, you figure).

You smile back at him, but it doesn’t quite meet your eyes. 

Your fingers fidget with the paper stub — maybe a distraction for yourself or maybe to hide how you’re too anxious to stay still. Steve figures it’s a bit of both. ‘Cause he knows you too well and not a thing gets by him. There’s nothing about you that he doesn’t notice.

He turns to face you completely while everyone else gets their ticket. He keeps his wedged between his middle and forefinger as his hands curl around the outsides of your elbows. He’s serious, but still soft — gentle, but still firm. 

“Babe—”

“Stevie,” you interject with a similar tone. “I’m okay.”

“You heard her, Stevie. She’s fine!” Robin retorts, curling her maroon-tinted lips into a smirk. She scoffs out a laugh and gestures up to the fake haunt across the street. “This shit is basically for kids. No one’s dying here, alright?”

You know what she’s doing. She’s sticking up for you and taking the piss out of her best friend at the same time. It’s nothing new — hell, it’s her favorite hobby. She’s got your back now the same way she had it in that house last spring. 

But still, her words sting a little.

Because she’s right. This place is for kids. And you still feel a bit like you’re dying.

Steve knows this, too. He knows everything about you. Even the stuff you wish he didn’t.

His sneakers scuff against the pavement when he turns to Robin. His eyes narrow in a challenging squint as he crosses his arms over his chest. He doesn’t look quite as intimidating as usual in his fluffy, cable-knit sweater. 

“Well, you know what? I’m scared, actually. I don’t wanna do it, okay? You got me, Rob.”

The girl grins something cynical. She shakes her head all slow, like she’s just caught him in some kind of lie. “I knew it. You little baby.”

Steve lets her tease him. It’s not like he isn’t used to it by now. He just rolls his eyes and bears it, lets her laugh about it with the rest of the group as they head towards the haunted house. 

You watch with an attentive gaze while they head inside, flinching softly when you hear a thunderous boom and the sound of their screaming a second later. It leaves you secretly grateful that you hadn’t gone in behind them. 

A wavering sigh tumbles from your lips, a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

Steve exhales a gentle laugh from beside you. He smooths a wide palm up your spine and down again. He leans over to press the side of his hip against yours.

You cross your arms over your chest to make yourself as small as possible while you glance over at the boy beside you. You look at him so far beneath your lashes you’re basically peering at him from the corner of your eye.

“Thank you,” is all you say. It’s all you need to say.

Steve shrugs with a plush, crooked grin. “’S okay. I know you’re too sweet to say no, so…”

“I wanted to do it,” you confess, clearing your throat when your voice breaks.

“I know.”

“I guess I’m not… as used to everything as I thought.”

“I know,” Steve repeats. His hand curls around your waist and makes a home in the very center of it. He pulls you closer with the urge to melt into you. His brows raise, eyes sparkling when his smile widens. “But that’s why I’m here, though, right? We’re gonna get better together.”

You nod up at him, smiling more sincerely now. 

Arms still crossed, your hands ball into fists to fight the urge to smooth a hand through his hair — to push back the rogue chestnut strands hanging over his forehead.

You hesitate, so he beats you to the draw. He swipes a golden hand over his head right before he leans down to kiss you. 

He smacks a sweet peck to your smile. A bright light flashes with another thunderous boom a moment later. You flinch and pull back. You swear you hear Eddie screaming, “jesus fucking christ!” from the upper story. You forget to be scared.

You didn’t think it was possible. The whole getting better thing.

Steve makes you feel like could be.

[joeyleesblog]

Sorry brother (from the series You made me hate my reflection)

Miles was paying for his sins against Pandora and her people. Officially.

"He's going to be fine, kids. Yes, he will because he's a tough kid. – Neteyam kept muttering non-stop, for whatever reason, imitating his father's voice, but it got weird. – Ah yes, how well he turned out, father!!"

Ah, should I be offended? Miles thought absently. I'm definitely better, but nobody accepts that fact. Idiots.

Neteyam moved suddenly, Miles automatically tensed and prepared to defend himself, but the Na'vi boy did nothing but glare at Miles...

No. Not Miles. Spider.

"I wanted to come after you – we all did, I swear. We wanted to rescue you, Spider, I swear."

Oh, for God. Why didn't he just walk away and pretend he didn't see anything? Now he has to deal with a drunk guy spewing excuses for a dead kid. Excellent.

All very well. Just this once. Miles decided.

"Then why didn't you? If you cared, what stopped you?" - There was no judgment or accusation in his tone, just pure questioning. Which caught Neteyam off guard, but it took a few seconds for him to recover and respond.

""Daddy said you'd be fine... you were one of them and you were, you were a child - they would see it - they should see it!" – The sudden anger in his voice, an outrage flared in his yellow eyes. Miles ignored it.

"He is your father, it is natural for you to believe and trust what he says."

"“I shouldn't – Neteyam explodes – I shouldn't – not at that moment, I shouldn't! I should have, I should have...”

"What should you?"

""I should have gone after you. I could have at least tried, dammit! I should have tried, fought harder for you! You, you were my friend, my brother, it was my duty to protect you. I, I... "

“I, I failed you. – regrets Neteyam. “No…not just that night, but before, I left you alone, when we were younger. I walked away and believed you would be fine because your had Loa'k and Kiri. I... I never thought about how you understood my withdrawal or how you felt. I did not do. I'm sorry, Eywa! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Spider... Sorry"

Neteyam starts sobbing and wailing, Miles lets him cry all he wants, thinking how shitty this situation was for both of them. Neteyam shouldn't be apologizing to Miles, but to Spider. Miles shouldn't get that apology, but Spider does. Nothing was right, but it was too late to change things.

When Neteyam finally calmed down and seemed more in control of himself, Miles grabbed his shoulders and looked deep into his eyes.

"I can't forgive you. – His tone was calm, serious. – I'm not him, Neteyam. I can't give you what was his right. And no matter how many times you ask him for forgiveness, you get nothing from a dead man."

Neteyam's eyes widened at his words and when he opened his mouth to probably protest, Miles didn't let him.

"I'm not him. Spider died in that interrogation and I was born in his place. I am Miles Socorro and I have my own experiences, memories, my own life, Netayam. – he let Neteyam process the words for a moment before continuing. – "Besides, you would have been captured and unlike Spider, you was going to die or be used as a bargaining chip. Your family would have tried to save you and possibly die too. In other words, it would have been all for nothing. Chasing ghosts won't make him come back. It's time to move forward and not be left behind."

Tears come out of Neteyam's eyes.

"But I can not. Remembering him is all I can do for him."

""I'm not asking you to forget him, but that you stop chasing his ghost as a form of punishment for not being able to save him. Answer me one thing, would Spider have a grudge against you or another member of your family?"

Neteyam blinked at the sudden question and after thinking it over, replied with a sad smile.

"Spider was never one to hold a grudge. Not for long, anyway. He was such a good kid, too."

And too afraid to be alone. Miles decided not to share the thought, not when Nateyam finally stopped crying. And anyway, he suspected it wasn't necessary.

"Then stop punishing yourself. Spider would get sick of you."

Neteyam laugh.

...

Post 1 , Post 2, Post 4

[ask-andante]

I've followed this story and thought a lot about the characters on this blog since nearly the beginning, they'll all continue to be a huge source of happiness and inspiration for me for a very long time. If you ever do decide to continue the story, do a reboot, or do anything else with them I will 100% be there for it.

I also just wanted to say that the ending you had in mind is so beautifully tragic. Andante finally gets his old wish for power granted but it's at the cost of losing the same person he loved so dearly for the second time, this time permanently(?). The two of them finally got to spend time together without Andante being in the grip of Madness, which I'm sure was wonderful while it lasted, and they defeated A Literal God together. But it still results in Kia's death. They both defied their fates so strongly and yet Tial, the mew who was fated to always die, still dies again in the end. My heart hurts. 😭

Oh and I did have a couple questions- Does Andante ever learn that Kia was created from Tial's DNA? And do all/most of his memories manage to come back before he becomes the new god?

ARRRGG THANK YOU !! ;__;;b the fact they're ever on people's mind is something i never know unless people mention it so knowing this makes me really happy and encourages me w future ventures too !! ;__;;!!

YEAS... I am happy the ending resonates w you !! I like to think Kia helps Andan best he can while Andan starts his journey to recover, even if he prolly uses the new mission as a distraction... so many opportunities to be held in arms of big mewtwo guy.......

I don't think they were ever gonna find out! Kia is made from several sources of DNA, Tial's just happened to be in there and prolly makes up a good chunk of it. Plus after the earth explodes, there's no more records to go sift through regarding Kia's creation, and considering he was a huge bully as a little mewtwo I think he thinks it's fer the best JKBDSJKFJKSDB

As fer Andan's memories, yes and no, becoming god is weird and you become something else almost entirely. Since he wasn't "born" as an energy god, he would be able to maintain a physical form and he eventually deviates from his original appearance but remains mew-like. I think he gains them all back but in the, now aware of them way, rather than "i lived that personally" way.

[malt-rants-and-stuff]

⚠️‼WARNING!! HIRAKAGI MANGA CHAPTER 21 SPOILERS‼⚠️

I ALREADY SAID IT BEFORE BUT THIS CHAPTER HAD ME ON THE FLOOR!! I HAVE LEGIT PERISHED WHILE READING SO MY GHOST IS HERE TO WRITE ABOUT HOW AMAZING THIS CHAPTER WAS!!!

‼ SPOILERS BELOW CUT ‼

OKAY STARTING OFF STRONG, THE VERY FIRST PANEL!

LOOK AT THESE CUTIESSSS!! I WILL NEVER BE OVER THE FACT THAT KAGI IS THE FIRST THING HIRANO SEES EVERY MORNING!!!!

SASAKIIIII OGAAAAAA MY BOYS ITS BEEN TOO LONGGGGGG

BRIBERY! :D

Hirano back at it again feeding into the pilot propaganda

also, kinda gay to think about another man like that unprompted while using the word "exploring" if you ask me.

"I can't believe he had the nerve" I can't believe you had the nerve to even think that.

also, love sasaki giving one of his classic "I know what you are hirano" looks

HANZAWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Have I ever said how much I love this dude? he is so silly and so important to me you don't understand. this panel is adorable!!!

HIRANOOO YOU ARE SO CLOSE TO GETTING IT, THE POINT IS RIGHT THERE!! IT IS NOT DIFFERENT WITH THE DAMN PEPPERS MY BOY!!!

I LOVE HOW HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S GOING THROUGH EVERY STAGE OF GRIEF IN THAT SECOND PANEL LMAOOO

"I think......" I AM GOING TO KILL!!! WHY IS THIS HITTING ME JUST AS HARD AS THE "I guess he wasn't going to touch me" SCENE AAAAAAAAAAA

alsooo I count this entire page and the page before as more proof for my aspec hirano propaganda

KAGI MY SON YOU LOOK SO CUTEEE

WHEN I TELL YOU I DIE EVERY TIME HE DOES THIS

ACK THE BLUSH!!! NOT VERY HETERO-JUST-ROOMATES OF YOU HIRANO!!

also I love how he's slowly getting more and more flustered everytime kagi asks for 10 seconds

he looks so happy i am gonna CRY

........................... . z.d.s..s.

JAKKQOWISHSJHDBBDHDJWISKWOAOKAK

OH MY FUCKING,,,,,,,,,

I CANNOT DO THIS I CANNOT COPE I AM DEAD DYING ON THE FLOOR I HAVE DIED FROM GAYBRAIN I WILL NEVER RECOVER

also THIS WAS SO TSUNDERE OF YOU HIRANO IM SORRY BUT ITS TRUE

also also THE FIRST TIME HIRANO INITIATES THE 10 SECONDS THIS IS A MONUMENTAL OCCASION I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD FRAME THIS PANEL

EXPLODES!!!! KAGI'S FACE I CANT DO THISSSSS

SO BLUNT KAGI LMAO!

"........." QHAT DOES THAT MEAN HIRANO!!! EXPLAIN!!!!!!!

.

WHAT.

WHATTYYTTJEOAJSKEHEKWJS

KAGI HELLO?!?!??!?!???! I AM UNWELL?????? YOU CANT BE DOING THIS TO ME????????

FIRST MITSUKOU DATE NOW THIS I AM IN SHAMBLES

THE MANGA IS JUST AS SHOCKED AS I AM?!?!?!!!

-------------

OVERALL: 10/10 CHAPTER I AM NEVER GOING TO RECOVER THANK YOU HARUSONO!!! I NEED FINANCIAL COMPENSATION FOR THE MENTAL DECOMPOSITION CAUSED BY THIS CHAPTER 🙏

[vagabondfandoms]

Falls On Me

Day 5- Tiefling Party: Early Evening

Rating: Teen/Mature 

Previous Chapters: Chapter One , Chapter Two , Chapter Three , Chapter Four , Chapter Five , Chapter Six , Chapter Seven ½ , Chapter Seven 2/2 , Chapter Eight , Chapter Nine ,

Characters: Gale Dekarios and F!Tav: Copper

Tags/Warning: Gale POV, Gale x Female Tav. Alternative version of the Weave Scene. Approx: 3400 words

Gale tries to distract himself from his near-death experience and Mystra's continual dismissal. But expected emotions come up when Gale and Copper connect through the Weave.

---

The long day was soon winding down and the stars were coming out to play alongside everybody in camp. The joy of victory was contagious and even the most sour individual was cracking a smile at the defeat of the goblin army. 

Gale of course felt happiness and even relief at the annihilation of the goblin hoard and after spending the good part of the day recovering at the Druid’s Grove he even felt energized. But there was a small part of him that couldn’t shake the gloom of death and thoughts of Mystra. 

His Goddess didn’t care that Gale almost died. 

There were no magical interventions to heal him. No heavenly reprieve from his suffering. Just plain old-fashioned dumb luck and quick reactions from his teammates that prevented him from exploding. But Gale should have expected that, of course. Mystra never goes back on her word and if she is done with Gale, then she is done with him.

The man just hoped since her rejection was silent and not forthright that maybe somewhere in the goddess’s heart she would forgive him in the end.

“Urgh, let’s not get stuck on that line of thinking,” Gale grumbles to himself. “Let’s think happy thoughts! First, I am not dead. Second, I have an excellent bottle of wine waiting for me at my tent. Third….”

Well, he couldn’t think of a third but Copper comes into view and everything else is forgotten or at least put aside for the moment.

“Good evening, Gale.” Copper says with a smile. She’s dressed in her casual clothes and she looks far from the battleharden monk she was earlier in the day. “I was hoping you could join me at the celebrations tonight?” 

Gale smiles, happy that Copper sought out his company but then an idea springs in his head and he must follow it.

“I was hoping you’d spare me a moment.” Gale greets back, noting a slight eagerness in the woman’s demeanor. Did she start drinking already or was she truly happy to be in his company?… “There’s something rather magical I wish to show you tonight.”

“Are you sure that’s wise?” Copper asks, lifting an auburn eyebrow at him and crossing her arms in disapproval. “You could’ve died this morning from being low on magic.”

Gale coughs, wanting to avoid that topic again. “It’s perfectly safe, I assure you.” He places his hand over his heart as in oath. “No complicated, magic-consuming spells are needed.”

I just want to show you something few people have had the pleasure to experience.” Gale smiles and offers Copper a hand, wanting to lead her away before the party gets too rambunctious. “Let’s quickly head to more intimate surroundings so we don’t get disturbed by this revelry.”

“Pleasurable experience? Intimate surroundings?” Copper questions, her hand hesitating to reach for his as a slight blush forms on her cheeks, and Gale quickly realizes his offer could be mistaken for another pleasurable activity.

“Nooo, no!” Not that kind of….umm… pleasurable offer.” Gale hastily corrects. “I mean to teach you a magical lesson in the Weave. I’ve been promising you for days now and I want to show you my appreciation for all the Ki lessons you’ve graced me with.” Gale gratefully bows. “I truly don’t deserve your time or kindness.”

“Gale, that’s not true.” Copper gently argues, motioning for him to raise his head. But he knows the truth. He isn’t deserving of all the support Copper and now Karlach is giving him.

Gale swears he was mere seconds away from being kicked from the group if the two warriors didn’t defend him so vehemently against the others. Luckily, Wyll quickly joined in his defense and Astarion was outnumbered so the vampire didn’t put up much of a fight when Shadowheart and Lae’zel proved disinterested in continuing the argument as long as Gale could control his orb and left if it proved too unstable.

Startled out of his thoughts by the feeling of strong warm fingers wrapping around his long fingers. Copper looks at him expectantly and Gale realizes the monk is silently taking up his offer for a magical lesson. His stomach starts to flutter with excitement. “Excellent. Let’s mosey on over to a more quiet location.”

He needs to distract himself from his depressing thoughts and what better than a beautiful companion and a magical lesson?

---

“Copper is an excellent student in the Weave.” Even through her protests that she doesn’t have a drop of magical talent, Gale thinks as she mimics his words and actions to produce a burst of light. The happy look on the monk’s face was causing a surge of pride to swell in Gale’s chest. 

It’s been a while since he channeled the Weave in this way. Recently, Gale only dared to do it for battle. Yet being by another person’s side and channeling the Weave so imitately didn’t bring the same feeling of dread to the pit of his stomach. 

“If Mystra feels me connecting to the Weave in this way then so be it.” Gale hesitantly believes. All he was doing was teaching a fellow traveling companion a minor trick or two. It wasn’t like Gale was seeking the goddess’s attention. 

He just wants to return the favor to Copper for all the help she was giving him.

“Excellent. Now repeat after me,” Gale steps closer and instructs Copper in clear and concise prose. “Ah-Thran Mystra-Ryl Kantrach-Ao.” 

A wary look appears on Copper’s face as her eyes quickly flicker to Gale’s mouth as he speaks the incantation. The hesitation quickly turns to determination, and Gale smiles at the sight before thinking ahead so he can blaze the trail to make it easier for Copper to magically follow. The concept of harmony bursts through his mind. The scent of rosewater, a sense that everything is fine in his world, and a sweet taste on the tongue. 

Copper’s eyes grow large and then Gale feels her whole body relax and he smirks, she must have felt the change in the air, as he leads her down this magical exploration. With only the smallest inaccuracy, Copper repeats the incantation. 

“Very good.” Gale praises, looking fondly at the woman. “Now I want you to picture in your mind the concept of harmony. As true as you can.” 

Without a second thought, Copper closes her eyes in prayer. 

Magically connected to the monk, Gale is greeted with a sense of nothingness.

This well of nullity lasted for several seconds and just as Gale was starting to feel concerned for Copper’s mental well-being, small sensations began to flutter at his chest and spark with life. The feeling radiates from his core outwards towards his limbs. 

Each small spark, crackles and comforts his sore muscles like he is made of a warm, gentle fire. However, the sensation doesn’t stop at his body's boundaries. The warm comforting feeling expands outwards connecting him to each blade of grass, the earth beneath his feet, and all the little life that surrounds him. 

Without realizing he is holding his breath, Gale lets out a gasp and greedily sucks in some air deep into his lungs and within that second he becomes one with the universe.

Gale’s body feels larger, stronger, and calmer than it could alone.

He is one with his surroundings and he is unable to figure out if this was the Weave or Copper’s doing…but the thought gets wiped away as quickly as it came and he settles into the pleasant feeling. 

He smiles over to his companion just as she slowly opens her grey eyes and smiles back. Their souls are connected and he was not expecting this kind of reaction when he offered a small magic lesson.

The longer Gale stares, the more he realizes, how deep and reflective Copper’s eyes are. It’s addicting staring into those eyes and feeling this connected to somebody. This warm, safe, and whole. 

“I was missing this my whole life.” Gale briefly thinks as a pull to kiss, to meld into the person next to him floods his body. 

But before he can act on that impulse to kiss Copper, Gale senses her. Mystra, the Lady of Mysteries, Gale’s goddess herself, came to investigate the pleasant hum that was vibrating through her Weave. 

The wind gets knocked out of him, sensing Mystra nearby and in that second of distraction, Gale is mentally surprised by a pleasant image of Copper kissing him. Tender at first that soon turns passionate.

Gale turns away from the magical presence of the Goddess of Magic and tries to focus his eyes on the person before him. Copper is looking at him with a hooded expression reflecting the desire that they felt as she leans in for something they both were drawn to do. 

Embarrassment boils and runs over, followed by hesitation, and exhilaration. But no, Gale can’t do this now. Can't kiss Copper now. Not with Mystra so close…not with her watching. 

However, Copper doesn’t recognize the sensation of the goddess’s presence as Gale does. So the monk doesn't know the turmoil with Mystra is happening and her eager face soon drops to disappointment at Gale’s hesitation to kiss her. 

The magic quickly evaporates like a droplet of water hitting a hot stone and Mystra disappears just as quickly now that the Weave has come undone. 

Copper looks shy and rejected, standing in front of Gale. It feels like she might sprint away any second now. But Gale isn't ready to address the goddess in the room and the folly that brought him here so he quickly turns to another subject matter, embarrassment coloring his voice and actions.

“Well… that was an exhilarating picture!” He claps his hands and rubs them together as he shifts from heel to toe. “I wasn't expecting it but it was very welcomed nonetheless.”

Copper gives him a questioning look and the wizard feels her withdraw from him. “Really?” Copper says hesitantly. “I feel like I completely misread this situation.”

“Noo, no you did not!” Gale quickly corrects. “You were- we both were- umm, feeling the same in that moment. It's just a very complicated situation on my part.”

Copper frowns and her eyes lose her usual sparkle for the man. “You have somebody else?” she whispers, connecting the dots right away.

“Yes.” The word comes out without Gale’s permission. Hurt floods Copper's grey eyes and before Gale can explain further she quickly turns to run away back to the party, away from him and the hurt he caused.

“Wait, please!” Gale shouts in frustration, grabbing Copper's hand and pulling her back to him. “Don't go. I couldn't stand you being sad on my account.” 

“I’ve been acting a fool with a man who's already taken. I do not wish to keep up this charade.” Copper hisses out, refusing to look at Gale out of embarrassment.

“It's no charade,” Gale murmurs, rubbing his thumb over Copper's warm skin, already missing his connection with her. He feels her tense up but he can't find it inside himself to let go. “It's just my…Goddess.”

“You told me you were an ex-Chosen of Mystra before.” Copper says heatedly.  “I didn't pry into why. But I don't understand how your goddess affects what we have. Why does it make you hesitant to…be with me?”

Copper has proven to be strong and dependable yet in this second she seems tired and barely keeping her pieces together through iron will alone.

Gale feels faint, like all his blood disappeared from his body. Still holding Copper’s hand, refusing to let her run. Gale sits down and hides his face with his free hand. 

“Tell her the truth, you coward! She deserves to know the truth after everything you put her through. She barely knows you and doesn’t deserve this treatment. And once you do explain the whole sordid affair you better prepare to let her go. It's the best for her and you. Save each other the heartache.”

Gale mentally berates himself. Going through hundreds of explanations in his head on what to say to the monk but each one lands on him being a worthless ignoramus, a disgrace of a wizard.

“Gale?” Copper gently questions, bringing the man out of his reprimanding thoughts. She doesn't say anything else, letting her original words stand for themselves. But at least he’s not feeling her actively trying to pull away from him.

Gale drops her hand and claps his together, steeling himself for the next few minutes.

“As you know, I am what one might call a wizard prodigy. Such was my skill that it earned me the attention of the mother of magic herself.” He sighs and continues “Starting at a young age, Mystra revealed herself to me and she became my teacher. In time, she became my muse, and later my lover.”

Gale senses Copper becoming very still next to his side. “You had your goddess as a lover?”

“Oh yes,” Gale says, feeling a flicker of burned-out pride at his words. “We enjoyed each other’s company- body, mind, and soul. But even so, I desired more… You see, no matter how powerful a wizard we mortals can become, we never scratch more than the surface of the Weave. Mystra keeps us in check.” 

Copper lets out a huff at that statement and Gale feels encouraged to go on. 

“There are boundaries she doesn’t let us cross. Yet each time I was with her, I stood on the precipice, gazing into the wonders that lay beyond. Wanting more than what I currently possessed and knowing she could give it to me. If only…”

“She should have known better to show you such a thing.” Copper mutters, appearing agitated.  “Enlightenment is something that is earned through years of work to understand our minds. Cause we mortals truly only have barriers in our minds. We must slowly learn to overcome them. If we are shown the truth beyond our understanding at that moment, then those benevolent barriers become cages.” 

“Yes, you are right on that.” Gale turns to her in shock, not expecting this woman to understand him so easily. “I learned there were things beyond my understanding. I sought to be free of my cage. I tried to convince Mystra. I pouted, I pleaded, and I swore my ambition was only to serve her better. But she only smiled and wanted me to be content- locked in my limitations.”

Gale’s hands begin to shake and his orb responds to his agitation, like it knew he was going to speak of it next. 

“I…I thought if I showed her I was better than all the other magicians, all of her other Chosen, then she would unlock my cage and allow me beyond her veil. I sought after a piece of Weave lost to her during the Spellpague. I thought if I returned this lost part of herself to Mystra she would finely deem me worthy to be her full-time companion in all the ways that truly counted, in both mind, body, and soul.”

Copper chuckles drily and shakes her head. “I guess you ruled out flowers and chocolates to woo your woman.” 

“You know me. My gestures can never be grand enough.” Gale jokes, his heart feeling a little better from the lighthearted teasing. “I was certain this deed of raw power draped in romance would convince Mystra to take me by the hand and welcome me into her hitherto forbidden domains. But I was mistaken…”

“Let me guess, this is where the orb comes in?” Copper asks.

“You are correct.” Gale sighs and reaches forward for Copper’s hand. She jerks back slightly from the sudden touch but allows the man to grasp her hand. “Here, place your hand over my heart. You’ve done it before but now know the truth.”

Copper’s strong fingers rest, in the cradle of his collarbone and chest, over his damaged heart. The warmth from her skin spreads instantly but Gale doesn’t dwell on the sensation as he lets his guard down, letting their tadpoles mentally connect. 

The memory is agonizing and Copper is right alongside him for the ride. Images of dark hallways. A book, bound, then suddenly opens. Inside there are no pages, only a swirling mass of blackest Weave that pounces. Tearing into his flesh, to settle hungrily in his chest. Slurping up all his magical energy, discontented with the feast that lay before it.

“Gale!” Copper says worry in her voice as she grits her teeth at the memory of the magical attack.

“As you can see, I recovered the lost piece of Weave, sealed within a Netherse tome.” Anger grows in Gale's voice. “But once I opened that cover, I was cursed with this blight and Mystra dismissed me as her Chosen. She turned her back towards me. Unhappy with my mild rebellion to win her love.” 

“She refused to help you? After everything you did for her?”

“Mystra is a goddess and oftentimes fickle. Even when I loved her with all my heart,” Gale says discouragedly. “I disobeyed her and was punished for it.”

“Gale that is not fair!” Copper says out loud what the man hides in his heart.

“You serve a god! Don’t you expect to be punished for disobeying him?” Gale argues back, still faithful to Mystra’s image. 

“I serve a good god!” Copper asserts, her eyes blazing with pride. “A nice god that understands our human struggles. Ilmater would alleviate any suffering, and never punish his followers for choosing to love, no matter how foolhardy the journey. Has Mystra fallen so far to forget what it’s like to be human?”

“You know Mystra was a human once?” Gale says with curiosity.

“You aren’t the only wizard I’ve made acquaintance with, Gale.” Copper reprimands with a small huff. “Your human folly shouldn’t condemn you to suffering when Mystra could easily take that blighted piece of Weave away from you. You shouldn’t suffer from loving and trying to please her. No harm was done except onto you.”

“I wish Mystra saw it that way.” Gale sighs dejectedly. “But I wronged her. Now I am condemned to take care of this orb until it kills me. And I forbid taking you or anybody else down that path with me.”

“Is that why you hesitated to kiss me before.” Copper says frankly, her earlier embarrassment about the topic gone.

“Yes, in part,” Gale answers without mentioning that Mystra was present for that almost kiss and he doesn’t yet know how to sort out his complicated feelings for his goddess. “I feel drawn to you but I am not worthwhile for you to pursue. Especially now with this blasted thing in my chest. I feel any sort of “excitement” might trigger an explosion.” 

“Gale…” Copper pleads, taking a step closer to him but stopping short of touching him. “I just want to enjoy your company in any way you can give me. I’m not asking for much. I just want to continue walking by your side until this journey is done.”

“If we are only walking you might get bored,” Gale says as a mischievous glint appears in his eyes as he takes her waiting hand. Caressing the skin. “I might have to fill the hours with my scholarly expertise. A lecture perhaps or a debate on the merits of the Weave over Ki?”

“The horror.” Copper jokes, shaking her head as a playful smile emerges. 

“But in all honesty. I’m glad to know you enjoy my company so much.” Gale brings her hand up to his lips for a quick peck. “But I’ll loathe to waste your time tonight. There’s a party to be had. Go, indulge in the frivolities-they’re good for the heart. And mine would be all the lighter, to see you enjoying yourself.”

“What about you?” Copper asks, confusion on her face as Gale turns the conversation around. “Aren’t you joining me?”

“I’m awfully tired.” Gale lies. “I think I’m going to head to bed. But not before I take you to enjoy the food table.” He grips Copper by the shoulders and playful steers her back to camp. “I don’t know where Wither’s conjured up all that food and wine but it would be a shame to let it go to waste.”

Disappointment flashes in her eyes but she quickly hides it as Gale leads her along.

---

The next chapter will be the last for Part One!

[mengyan]

Hello! If you have read the novel, could you give us some details about Furong and Mofang? :) I am curious about their story since the drama unfortunately doesn't show much about them

sure anon! actually speaking, as the drama’s script was also written by jiu lu fei xiang (aka the author of the novel), she’s doing a fantastic job of expanding further on mo fang and fu rong’s relationship! there are actually more moments and, in a way, feelings between them in the drama compared to the novel. but that’s just my opinion as someone who has seen both!

in the novel, this is what we get (WARNING FOR PLOT SPOILERS):

the selling tickets thing doesn’t happen in the novel. mo fang and fu rong first meet when fu rong gets drunk in that wine shop. mo fang is furious at him for dragging shen li’s reputation down with him and thus goes to pick him up, taking him away. before he can do so, fu rong says he has “eyes like stars, with such soul” and kisses him in front of everyone. mo fang is dumbstruck but the second he recovers, he immediately knocks fu rong out before dragging him home. this scene was edited slightly to attempt to pass censorship and presumably filmed, but ended up being cut— thus resulting in that weird cut to the knockout and a shorter runtime of the final produced episode (which was only 36 mins).

although in the novel it is not explicitly stated how fu rong ends up grabbing mo fang’s pendant, he does do so while drunk (i headcanon that it happens while mo fang drags him back) and he does spend a long while trying to return it to him, just like in the drama. jlfx actually managed to keep 95% accuracy of their scenes and lines said, with the 5% amount of deviation due to censorship.

one of the lines cut was mo fang saying that he's "never hated/never been more annoyed by anyone in his entire life" which i wish they kept but it's okay

when xing zhi ends up clarifying that mo fang was rejected by shen li, fu rong is overjoyed and says something like “this is a good chance for me [to pursue him] then!!”

again, like the drama, fu rong is kicked and escapes to the mortal realm, and when fu rong returns, he clings every day to mo fang’s side. one detail i like that the drama added was that we got to see mo fang regret it and hold out his hand to help him up, but fu rong didn’t know he was trying to help and fled!! 😭

you lan still warns mo fang to stay away from fu rong and says all that stuff about how her brother normally doesn’t pursue men like this, like i am not kidding when i say jlfx is keeping everything she can

this is where plot spoilers begin so look away if you must!

while the demon realm is in crisis, mo fang is “swallowed” by demons upon fighting them, and “dies”. when fu rong finds this out, we learn from you lan that he went crazy, his spiritual power exploded, and because his powers are so pure, he ended up washing out all of the colour of his plants and exploded his courtyard.

he was unconscious for a long time, and when he woke up, he learned of mo fang’s betrayal, which broke his heart even further. he became silent and uncommunicative and did not let anyone fix his courtyard, so it’s still broken to this day.

from then on, fu rong dresses in plainer clothes (as if he's mourning... 😭) and swears to work hard to help guard the xutian abyss's barrier for the rest of time.

from one of he yu (fu rong) and xin yunlai (mo fang)'s interviews, it seems like we will be getting a lot more of their bond in the drama which makes me really excited! xin yunlai says that mo fang eventually ends up finding fu rong quite cute and that he doesn't want such a cute and kind person to be in danger. he yu says that later, when mo fang is revealed as a traitor, fu rong is the first to believe that he's not a bad person, and that he understands mo fang the most.

suffice to say i am NOT READY for the second half of this drama!! i hope this helps you out, anon!

[arabellasleopardcoat]

Hmm… hey! I just read "You wouldn’t believe the things I have done for her" and omg this is so good and so well written!!! That said and taking advantage of the mafia theme, I wanted to know if I can get a mafia boss! very angst (breaks my heart) but with fluffy and happy ending Daemon x wife poc!reader. In that she works for/with him, she is a sort of “jack of all trades” working closely with him on business (meetings, receiving shipments, etc.) and also handles certain shady parts of the business when he is too busy to sort it out. the problem personally. One night, Daemon has a meeting with some partners from the legal side of the business, but he has some unfinished business to resolve (they lost a shipment). And he's upset that he can't resolve it in person, the reader offers to go see it herself. He doesn't want to let her, because it could be dangerous, but she ends up convincing him. Arriving at the place, she manages to solve the problem, but upon leaving she realizes that it is a trap. She manages to dodge some shots, but ends up being hit. She is taken to the hospital, and Daemon is notified. At the hospital, she undergoes surgery. Viserys and Rhaenyra arrive to support Dae. Hours later the doctor tells them that the surgery went well, that she is stable, but that unfortunately she lost the baby (neither she nor Daemon knew she was pregnant). Daemon is devastated, very angry and feeling guilty. Viserys, who was the chief before Daemon, knows exactly what his brother is feeling (the same thing happened to Aemma, but she died along with the baby she was expecting and they knew about the pregnancy, so he passed the baton and decided " retire") tries to console his brother. Daemon orders his men to find out who did this to her. Reader is released from the hospital. They're still looking for clues, but they're not making much progress. Daemon is dedicated to taking care of her. Despite what happened, she is doing well and recovering quickly. One day, he receives a call saying that they found the culprits. He interrogates the guy and then solves the problem in a very violent way. He returns home covered in blood, but the reader doesn't care. She helps him clean up and it's not like she was happy with what he did, but she knew it was something he needed to do to be "at peace with himself", at least that's what she thought. She's much better and he goes back to work, but he kind of removed her (that's a soft way of saying he fired her) from all of her work. She doesn't agree, but he is irreducible. Even though she is fine and he got revenge, he can't forget it and feels very guilty about what happened every time he looks at her. Therefore, he distances himself and spends most of his time at work. She knows that something is wrong with him, but decides to give him space, she realizes that she is useless and that she hardly sees him anymore (he leaves early and arrives late). She notes that they still haven't talked about what happened, he went into caregiving mode and she just accepted it. She waits up for him one night, and tries to start the conversation in a civilized and calm way, but he avoids the subject. She insists and they start to argue, until he explodes and says he can't look at her without feeling guilty, that because of him she almost died and they lost their unborn child. She reassures him (or at least tries to), and says that at no point did she blame him and that she could never blame him. They open their hearts to each other and make passionate love, promising that he will give her another child, please? (sorry for the amount of details and sorry for my English)

Hi! I am glad you loved my fic so much to send me a request after (And don't worry, your english is totally fine) but I can't take it. I am so sorry, it's just that I take all my requests on bingo format. I am nearly done with it too, so I am trying to focus on that. I hope this is alright.

[yourbestpalpercy]

Come next morning, Glaze woke up, stretching as much as he could before looking over at The Blaze. She was completely still. So still that Glaze wondered if she was zoning out or just being extremely quiet. Seeing The Blaze so still was chilling. Usually, something was moving on The Blaze, maybe her hand tapping on the ground or her foot tapping to imaginary music.

Glaze wanted to poke her but soon watched as she lifted her head up towards the smolders of last night’s fire. “Phew…! I-I uhm…mmrrrp…thought you fell asleep or something,” ‘I thought you died,’ whispered Glaze’s thoughts. The Blaze looked over at Glaze, scoffing, “I don’t sleep, Toon. Never will. Now come on, we’ve got walking to do.” The Blaze stood up to her tall self. Well, she at least looked tall compared to him.

“So, when’s the new time prediction?” Glaze asked as The Blaze looked off into the distance. “I still say evening. We’ve got…” Weirdly, Glaze swore he saw The Blaze show an actual emotion behind that mask she always wore. It looked like she was squinting. “About a good few hills to climb and I’ll bet you don’t want to go around them?”

“...” Glaze admittedly shot the carrier a bit of a glare. “You really need to stop assuming things about me just cuz I’m a toon, mmggrrrghgm..” Glaze crossed his arms as he walked down the hill, accidentally tripping over his hat and rolling down the rest of the hill.

From what Glaze could barely see as he tumbled, The Blaze just watched him roll down the large hill, leaning over more and more from time to time to watch his whole descent. Then, he saw a flash of orange light. After that, he couldn’t see The Blaze anymore-! Did she leave or something-?

Oof-! What did he just run into?? Glaze slowly recovered from the tumble, slowly looking up and spotting The Blaze just as she tucked her fiery wings away. “O-Oh! Gwaahaha..there you are! I thought you were fl-flying away!” Glaze giggled, patting himself down and shaking the grass off. His donut shaped pupils had faded into green blobs for a moment. “Kinda, I was flying ahead of you. You were rolling rather fast..” Glaze just kept giggling, brushing off any feelings of motion sickness he felt. It…almost sounded like The Blaze had just finished laughing and was trying to hide it. “I was! I was! Mrhghghr! That was fun! Super fun!” Glaze began to bounce on his feet. His eyes returned back to normal.

The Blaze’s expression softened a little (not like Glaze could see it behind her mask). Glaze was silly, rather endearingly so too. Honestly, it had been the first time in forever that someone had made her laugh. Last time that she could…barely remember..it was a different subject at the lab..she thought. There was a test…and…he told jokes…really bad ones. Glaze reminded The Blaze of that mystery face.

Glaze finished brushing himself off and stared up the hill before them and then back at the hill he rolled down. “I’m honestly shocked I didn’t blow up! It’s happened before. It’s a weird thing. If you shake me, I explode!” The Blaze just listened, finally un-tensing her shoulders. “You explode? Like into what? Con-?” “Confetti!!” Glaze cheered, throwing his floating hands into the air. The Blaze scoffed a tiny laugh. “Y’know, you’re one of the first people to make me laugh in a long time..I tip my mask to you,” She made a motion of tipping a hat. Glaze copied, tipping his sleeping cap back to her.

“You’re growing on me, Puffball. I feel conflicted,” The Blaze said, starting to walk around the large, cartoony hill. “I-I am?” Glaze said, running up to catch up to her, almost a little impressed with himself. “Yeah, your conversations, your tiny noises, your endearing stupidity? It all reminds me of a face I saw in the labs. Of course, I can’t remember the face but…I hope that whoever they were, they got the hell outta dodge and left that lab when everything was burning down…” Glaze’s eyes seemed to sparkle at the thought that he had made the quiet and cold wraith/knight/whatever The Blaze was, laugh! Well- he made her scoff a laugh.

“W-Wowie…no one ever laughs at my jokes! I’m actually- I was actually one of the most unpopular toons at Sweet Times Square,” He began to shuffle with his feet, almost anxiously. “I h-had friends b-but y’know, maybe it was a one sided thing–.” The Blaze just watched as Glaze soon began to tap his fingers and anxiously follow after The Blaze.

“...” The Blaze stared to the skies. Glaze watched as she froze, still staring up at the skies. “Have you ever been in the skies, Toon?” She asked. “...Are you offering to fly us to ToonTown?” Glaze asked. The Blaze scoffed and twitched her head in a way that made it looked like she was saying ‘No’. “Don’t phrase it like that, I might not do it in that case.”

Glaze watched as flames twisted together on her back. Some sparks fluttered off these forming wings, sparks that Glaze quickly stepped on and put out. The Blaze had started to spread out these wings before they were even finished forming. “I’ll be able to…” The Blaze began to mutter and mumble under her breath as she thought about it. Glaze just watched her wings form and glow behind her. Finally, The Blaze said something. “Take my hand, Puffball. We’re going for a fly. You’ll have to hold on tightly. I don’t want to drop you so take off the gloves, best way of avoiding it.” Glaze cupped his paws quickly. Suddenly, he didn’t want to go for a fly.

The Blaze turned back, picking up on Glaze’s worry. “I won’t tell a soul about your secret and you can put the gloves back on before entering ToonTown. I’ll drop you off outside of it.”

Glaze just murmured and grumbled some things before slipping off his red gloves. The Blaze was a little surprised to see blue paws underneath but it wasn’t like it blew her mind or anything. With that, he grabbed The Blaze’s outstretched, entirely bone hand. Sharp chills ran down his back when he directly felt her charred bones. They felt so ashy a-and cold yet burning hot!

Not a second later, The Blaze gave a mighty flap of her wings, causing the two of them to shoot into the sky. Admittedly, when The Blaze shot into the air, she practically burst into flames, coating Glaze in ash for just a moment. Glaze began to cough and pat the flames away in a panic! The Blaze grabbed his other hand so he wasn’t dangling. “...You can open your eyes now, Puffball. Don’t think I didn’t notice you squeezing them shut…” The Blaze’s voice was oddly calm. Glaze anxiously opened an eye.

Here they were now…in the blue skies. Far, far, far–almost too far–above the ground. This did not feel freeing. Glaze felt sick with anxieties up here! His brain and body twisted inside of him. The Blaze didn’t seem to notice, just flying away. In fact, The Blaze was definitely having a better time up here than Glaze was.

While Glaze suffered below, kicking his feet from time to time and clearly stressing out, The Blaze just glided through the air, tempted to spin and possibly make this trip a nightmare for Glaze. Her wings felt like they hadn't flown in forever! In a good and absolutely amazing way of course. Of course, when her wings were tucked away, it was a phantom sense as they were technically gone but- whatever!

“Th-This is– we’re really high, Blaze! I-I don’t even think m-my toon magic could save m-me up here!” Glaze whimpered, wanting to cover his eyes. The Blaze just rolled her eyes lightly. “We could be flying much higher. This is actually the lowest I’ve ever flown! And it feels amazing up here! I haven’t felt the wind in my face nor the wind over my wings in forever! I feel..I feel free, Glaze…” The Blaze answered, suddenly dipping down and then shooting back up.

DID SHE JUST LET GO!?

Glaze watched as he flew up higher into the air, and then started to fall! He screamed, already making his fast descent back to the ground. He pathetically grasped at the air. This is going to hurt- THIS IS GOING TO HURT–!!!

And then the sinking feeling in Glaze’s gut came to a lurch just as he shut his eyes. The Blaze had caught him. “Mrhgphere–!” Glaze swore, shaking even worse. His eyes were bright, yellow exclamation points as he shook in The Blaze’s hands. “Calm down, Toon. I wouldn’t’ve actually let you hit the ground,” The Blaze…teased? Glaze was too scattered right now to tell what that tone was.

The Blaze let out a laugh as Glaze shot a sharp glare at her, quite literally glaring daggers at her. “BLAZE!! THAT WASN’T– WASN’T FUNNY!!” He sharply kicked his legs about, cussing out The Blaze with many of his strange noises, “YOU GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK!!” This only encouraged The Blaze to laugh louder, finally letting out a real laugh. Glaze just-..huffed and wanted to cross his hands in a crossing-his-arms way.

Just as The Blaze had predicted, the sun had begun to set by the time ToonTown finally came into view. It was a large place. The Blaze had to set Glaze down further outside the town than expected (Wonderful, beautiful ground at last! Oh Glaze was shaking like a leaf in a storm!) so that she could make a quick fly around to see what entrances to the town she could see.

She wasn’t like Glaze. She wanted to be unseen. The Blaze wanted to remain as a myth of sorts. It had, admittedly, been really amusing to her when she discovered that she had become a bit of a rumor around the multiverse.

‘If you wait outside in the darkest night, The Carrier/Old Fire/The Wraith/Wow-she-has-a-lot-of-names will appear to you and ask you what your destination is. Pay her what you can as a token of respect and she’ll take you anywhere in the worlds’. Of course, The Blaze didn’t actually care for compensation. She didn’t actually know where that part of the rumor came from. She almost always refused any payment. No use for coins when you’ll never grow out of your clothes, no use for entertainment when you’re constantly busy, no need for sleeping gear when you don’t sleep, no need for food when showing your true self is risky and so on.

Well okay, she would happily accept food. She just needed to wait until her passenger fell asleep and then she could happily enjoy it with her mask off. Glaze actually offered her a donut as compensation and that night, he slept outside of the town before they started their journey the next day. Honestly, that was a good donut.

Also, she had wondered how many people had insomnia waiting for her now. How many people would think the rumors aren’t true and miss their chance. She couldn’t be everywhere at once. She had a life too! …Traveling dimensions, trying to find a place to settle down…and stuff. Helping runaways…

Finally, The Blaze dove down towards an entrance, having her wings stop her in her tracks and disappear. This opening looked promising. The Blaze allowed her fire to travel from her hand to her foot so that she could burn the ground around this entrance as a marking. Took her forever to find it, she wasn’t going to lose it.

The Blaze then had her wings come back and fly her back to Glaze who had just finished pulling his red gloves onto his blue hands, making them match the main color of his fur. “I found an entrance, Glaze…” The Blaze said, carefully taking Glaze’s hand. Glaze froze up before sighing when it clicked for him that it was just The Blaze and no one else.

“ToonTown looks so lively! It looks pretty at night! …But there’s admittedly this twisting feeling in my stomach..” Glaze whined as they walked down the small hill and started heading for the entrance The Blaze had found.

“Like there’s dangers here…” The Blaze lifted her head to the town, now noticing the 4 large buildings in each corner of the town. How hadn’t she seen those before? They were so…gray and…large compared to the liveliness of the rest of the colorful town (or…city?). “Dangers like those large buildings?” Glaze just nodded with ‘Mhm’.

“I’ll admit, they’re given me a chill too…” The Blaze murmured. “Bet you’ve never felt that before,” Glaze piped up in his ‘I’m-about-to-tell-a-joke’ voice. A voice that The Blaze hadn’t picked up on when she replied with, “I’ve felt plenty of chills before. It’s nothing-...Wait, do you mean chills as in-,” “The cold!” Glaze cheered, laughing at his own joke. “B-B-Because you’re all fiery!” Glaze laughed harder.

Admittedly, The Blaze started to giggle softly under her breath at Glaze’s joke. It was even more funny by the fact it was depressingly true! The Blaze hadn’t been cold in forever! Literally forever!

As the two approached the entrance The Blaze had marked, there was a sharp sound. Like a whistle. A whistle that was shockingly sharp and a whistle that weirdly hurt The Blaze’s ears. She hissed sharply, covering one ear and turning the covered ear towards the noise. The noise faded away and instead, came a voice. “We don’t need more Cogs, who are you!” The voice was…definitely that of a Toon’s. Had the same sound that Glaze’s did except it sounded older and…dog-like?

“Cog?” The Blaze mumbled, looking up and having her wings disappear. The glare of the lights behind the toon made them hard to see. The Blaze wondered if, with her wings out, the toon was dealing with the same problem.

Glaze quickly stepped in front of The Blaze. “Sh-She’s not whatever a Cog is. She’s just The Blaze! She carried me here. We both come in peace!” Glaze said, using his hands to…sorta block The Blaze. The dog toon before them looked at Glaze with a little bit of confusion on his muzzle. “Uhm…what’re you? Pardon my…rudeness, we saw her flying above and a lot of the toons got worried that she was yet another Cog. We’ve been dealing with a lot of them around here,” His tail flicked behind him anxiously. “I’m Glaze D. Donut!” Glaze smiled, stretching out his hand to shake the dog’s. “And…you’re a toon like a good lot of us? And…peaceful?” His voice still had its cautious sound to it. “Of course! Us Toons need to stick together!” The dog’s eyes went back to The Blaze. “And she’s…?” The Blaze only answered in her cold voice, “The Blaze. I’m just a traveler guiding folks to places…”

“The Blaze,” He nodded a bit. “If you didn’t have a Toon with you, I would’ve assumed you were even more of a Cog than I thought. Uhm…do you have any other names you go by other than a title?”

“None. I’m just The Blaze and besides…I won’t be here long. I’ll be gone by the next hour. All you need to know is that I’m The Blaze and I ferry people into other worlds as needed…” With that, The Blaze summoned her wings and flew off, away from ToonTown.

“She’s super nice when you get to know her!” Glaze cheered with a big dopey smile on his face. “I made her laugh too!”

“...And you’re Glaze, well, I’m Flippy,” Flippy smiled before guiding Glaze into the streets of ToonTown.

[peterlorres21stcentury]

I had written even more in my outline but it was messy as hell; this is the cleaned-up version if you can believe it

Sins of Abundance: a story of gluttony. (thank you @peterlorrefanpage for encouraging my silliness :D ) I've had all this in mind just sitting around in a file and I need to write an actual story about it. Fair warning, it will be very silly. The following is just a story treatment, and I cut some things like whole exchanges of dialogue so you wouldn't have to read through rough first-draft nonsense:

A new servant arrives in a fictional village, in the service of the eccentric Baron (whom she has never seen) and the first thing she notices is that every single person in the tavern is quite fat. From the plump young barmaids to the extremely fat and jolly innkeeper, everyone is a person of size and they seem to love it. Everyone is having a great time. When she asks for directions and advice, and the other patrons find out she’s one of the Baron’s new girls, they all seem to think this is funny. “But she’s so thin!” one bluntly calls out, a little sloshed with too much beer. “She won’t be for long,” his friend jokes. No one will explain any further and she leaves feeling puzzled and a little bit worried.

She has heard the stories, of course. How the Baron has an eye for beautiful women, and so employs only women in his estate. She fully expects him to be the typical wealthy old lech, if it weren't for his reputation of being far more interested in eating and drinking. Allegedly it's not exactly sex he's after, but there is one strange thing he demands of his servants: a soothing belly rub after every meal. Allegedly.

She doesn’t even get to see the Baron that night. He is supposedly ill, so all discourse is handled by his loyal retainer Celia, an older, rather severe and stately woman who handles all his business affairs. Sometime later, as the maid is wandering the dark and mysterious halls of the mansion unable to sleep during a summer thunderstorm, she is frightened by a huge lightning flash that reveals a towering shadow on the library wall. It’s the Baron, seemingly recovered enough to come down to his study for something to drink. He can’t sleep either. The girl is at first terrified of his severe demeanor, but that turns out to be a front and a little prank on his part. He is much kinder than that, as she will soon discover.

But until she realizes the truth, the new girl imagines all sorts of horrible things. She is frightened to death the first time she gets stuck with belly-rub duty after dessert, but after some amusing misunderstandings, she realizes exactly what the Baron wants... and she loves it. She was secretly attracted to the chubbier men, though she would never admit it out loud, and now here's one who takes so much pleasure in eating until it hurts. She considers it a privilege to retreat with him to his quarters after a really rich meal and give his aching belly the most loving attention he's ever had, and she rests on top of him as he sighs blissfully.

Later, she stumbles upon a secret: the Baron is the last of a very old family and has no heir. His beloved wife died many years ago, leaving him alone with only his servants and Celia for company (I had a dream about this story in which Celia said: "I have served the Baron faithfully for many years. I am very fond of him, but tradition dictates I cannot marry him").

The new girl also discovers, through reading the family history books, that the Baron wasn't the only gourmand in his lineage. They all were, including those who married into the family, and even some of the favorite servants! Every single one of them got to be impressively fat. His family records speak of ancestors who reached truly enormous sizes in a time before mass-produced snack food, and there are even amusing references to those who allegedly ate so much they exploded, however the Baron dismisses those stories as merely apocryphal. “In my family, I would be considered on the thin side,” he says slyly.

How was all of this possible? The Baron explains that one of his ancestors was into alchemy, or sorcery, I'm not sure which, but he created a formula that turned out to be a weight-gain powder and flavor enhancer (magic, I guess. We'll call it "spice" because I love referencing Dune at every opportunity, and there's also a fat Baron, so). Oh and also it made the crops more abundant or something, so there's more food for everybody. Through the years, as science improved, the Baron's family passed down the secret of making the stuff and continued using it as a sort of cultural signifier of abundance and wealth--if you belong to this family, you're going to be fat n' happy because the spice is in everything, sorry that's just the way it is. In any case, this probably explains why the majority of people that the maid first met in the village were all at least plump, with more being outright fat.

The last Baron decided that he would never use the stuff on anyone without their knowledge, but he still loves eating and sharing this enjoyment with others, so he makes certain demands of his servants (like the belly rubs) to determine who would be 100% into this kind of thing. Sometimes he invites them individually to the dinner table, or if he’s feeling really fancy, he orders a big feast and invites the servants to join him. The servants usually find it overly familiar and baffling, but the newest one loves it, and is starting to feel more and more open to the idea of gaining some weight.

The Baron is delighted at the chance to transform her, but at the same time he can tell she is nervous beyond belief. At first the Baron pretends not to notice her awkwardness, but later he does comment: “My dear, I can’t help but notice that you are so very flustered every time we meet. Do I frighten you?” The maid gulps. It doesn’t help that the Baron has leaned far back in his plush seat, pushing out his magnificent stomach, pressed taut against his elegant waistcoat. She stammers something about not being frightened but she turns even redder just thinking about how wonderfully big and round he must be under that tight vest, and she can’t stop thinking of running her hands all over him… she is forced to flee as soon as the Baron dismisses her, throbbing with arousal and shame.

Nonetheless, she finds herself increasingly excited by the idea of growing bigger all the time. Maybe she might get to be as regal and plump as the Baron’s beautiful late wife, whose portrait hangs prominently in the banquet hall. She wears an old-fashioned Empire-style dress the color of coral roses, and the portrait includes a depiction of her favorite dog, a fat smiling dachshund that looks like a happy little sausage roll.

Somewhere in here is a scene where she’s hungry while serving a rare social meal with neighboring nobles and is forced to stand there and serve while they eat. Her tummy is not happy. Everything smells wondrously good and she must wait, stomach rumbling impatiently. She prays no one heard that, but the Baron did, right as she stood next to him to refill his glass. She holds herself stiffly, tightening her abdomen to muffle the sound and wishing she could disappear, but the Baron only smiles knowingly to himself, and sends her a look of pity as Celia sends her off.

Then one day, near-disaster, or so it would seem: the maid calls him by an unflattering local nickname (“Baron Bauch”) by mistake one day and is horrified, but the Baron actually laughs—after several seconds of frowning at her, but he was only teasing her. “Don’t worry, I know all about what they call me. I have heard much worse, and you are lucky I am not the sort of person to care about it. And anyway, we are no longer living in the days when you could be imprisoned for saying something mildly unflattering.” He is amused enough by her embarrassment that he invites her to her first real dinner; a private one, as the only guest.

After the first sumptuous meal with the Baron, the maid feels like she’s going to pop, even as he expresses some disappointment that she didn’t finish everything. “No matter. You’ll get used to it in time,” he says. He gives her some pure butter shortbread cookies for dessert and pours out some clear liquor from a crystal decanter. “Here, take this.” She looks at it, hesitating. It smells faintly fruity and it has a curious light blue tinge to it. “What’s the matter? Ohoho, what do you think, it’s poison? Don’t worry. Only a digestif. It’ll make you feel better.” He swallows a shot, just to reassure her, and so she tries it. Almost immediately it does something to soothe her insides. Everything instantly loosens up and her stomach doesn’t feel tight or achy anymore. She feels almost stretchier. Relaxed, she lets out an involuntary burp and sends her a look of pity as Celia sends her off.

In a little while he plans to retire to his chambers with Celia for a belly rub but the maid can’t help but speak up: “Please let me!” she squeaks. The Baron looks her over with interest, but tells her perhaps another time. He promised Celia this night.

She leaves, burning with need for him, but she does what he commands. They continue this ritual for some time, and the maid becomes a lot more adept at eating mass quantities. One night, she and the Baron decide to have a friendly eating contest, and the result is pretty close. They both have to push themselves until it hurts, and they spend the rest of the night trying to comfort each other’s bellies. It’s the most satisfying experience of her life, and the Baron does all he can to encourage her. He wants her to eat as much as she can hold, and really enjoy that tight bursting sensation as something right and natural, and unbelievably erotic. “Isn’t it a good feeling? That exquisite ache... it’s what I live for,” he sighs. She agrees, at the height of her passion, and it leaves her shaking and pulsing all over.

They gradually fall asleep together to the sound of a surging, drenching rain pattering on the roof. It rains so hard that the view out the bedroom window is almost white, the wind whipping through a heavy gray curtain of falling rain. Thunder roars close by, making her shiver. “Are you frightened?” sighs the Baron, drawing her closer. “Don’t be. This is the time of year for rain, but we are quite safe here. Yes, quite safe. So warm and dry, and full…” She cuddles into his cushy belly and her fear ebbs away.

I don't know what happens after this, if anything.

[bowtiesnmusicals]

Here is my recap of the John. Stamos. episode of the podcast.

Kevin said wow wow wow. Jenna said wow wow wowzer is all she can say. Kevin said you are welcome in advance. He said because Jenna is the most universally liked person she is able to sometimes pull guests that the rest of us are grateful for. 

Uncle Jesse himself John Stamos aka Dr. Carl. 

Kevin said because Dr. Carl is rehearsing for a tour they might have a surprise guest that pops in to say hey and he will never recover. Jenna said it’s too much for one heart. 

John said he misses Jenna and Kevin so much. He said he missed one of  them more then the other. Kevin and Jenna said they missed him. 

John said he is proud of Kevin. He is a proud friend. Kevin said that is so sweet. Jenna said true John form giving all the compliments. 

John asked Kevin if he is in a relationship. Kevin told him that he actually met his first boyfriend during Glee. 

John said he gave them one piece of advice when he started on the show, don’t fuck each other. Jenna and Kevin said it was too late. 

Kevin said John was very good at corralling everyone. John would tell them stories about his experiences. 

John started name dropping people that were his mentors like Jack Klugman, Gary Marshall, and Don Rickles. He said he was waiting as long as he could to have to pay it forward. He was like oh I am old and these guys are young. He said the start of his success was gradual and glee exploded.

He told Jenna he is proud of her too and congratulated her on the baby. Jenna congratulated John on his son as well. She said the last time she had seen him was before John’s son was born. She talked about John telling her about his wife Caitlin while Jenna was in Waitress. John said his wife did get to see Jenna while she was in waitress. 

John asked if Jenna and Kevin had stayed good buddies this whole time. Kevin said yeah they were on facetime the night before until 10 or 11 pm. They are obsessed with each other. Jenna said it’s nice to work with your friends and be with your friends. Just work with the people you like and trust and be kind. Kevin said you’ve done that to John. John said yeah when they don’t die on me, Saget.

Jenna said she remembers texting him when Bob Saget died and there is nothing you can say. She said there is nothing to say but they knew and understood. It’s really hard. 

John said if you can take anything away from Bob Saget it is just enjoy every moment because it goes by so fast. Tomorrow is never promised. Love who you love. Have children and get married. He never left anything on the table. He always said I love you, I miss you, I’m proud of you. I want to see you naked. He said they got dirty. Kevin said as they should. Jenna said Kevin and I dirty text all the time. Who doesn’t?

John said they weren’t working you guys to death quite yet in season 2. Kevin said no we were. He said he doesn’t know what happened between first season and second season the schedule got even crazier. He said you would have thought we would have gotten into a rhythm and figured out how to do this but we really didn’t yet. They added more songs every episode for season 2. Therefore there was more recording and more rehearsal which meant less time to do anything. He said John was there when it was cresting into time oblivion. He said John, consummate professional, just rolled with everything. John said it was frightening because right at that point Glee was becoming the biggest show in the world. He said he would rent dance studios and work all night to get his performances down for Glee. Kevin said its nice that it looked like because that’s not how it always felt. He said it was the inverse when Kristin Chenoweth came in because she got it after seeing it once and it took them three days to look like they even remotely got anything. He said he remembers John being so open about being nervous and wanting to run things again. Kevin said they were happy to run it as many times as he needed because they were just happy to hang out with John.

Kevin said John is so talented and so good at so many things. It was interesting for him to come in and differ to them about how do I keep up with you guys. Kevin said they were like you’ve got this already. You are so much better then the rest of us. John said no, no, no, I’m just older. 

John is writing a book. John had a deal with Warner Brothers. Ryan had a deal with Warner Brothers after doing popular. Ryan told John he had an idea about a show where he was a hooker and it was like Charlie’s Angels. He said looking back he should have taken the offer. Then years later Ryan came to him with an offer to do Nip/Tuck and John said he should have done that show. Then after all this Glee came along. He said he met up with Ryan at Chateau Marmot. Ryan told him they were doing a Rocky Horror episode and play Frank-N-Furter. John said alright sign me up. He talked about how Ryan directed the first episode he was in, Britney/Brittany. Jenna and John both mentioned how Ryan would throw lines at them. Jenna said they only time they really ever went off script and tried things was when Ryan was directing. 

John was also a doctor on The New Normal. He was also in Scream Queens. He said he remembers seeing Ryan in his office working on three shows and working on them all at once. Kevin said as the Ryan empire grow it was fascinating to watch him work. He said the didn’t quite grasp how big it was getting. They didn’t really know what was going on with the other shows. Jenna brought up how Ryan said he didn’t know to manage this empire and how they felt kind of like their dad had abandoned them when he went to work on other shows like American Horror Story. 

Kevin asked what it was like to work with Jayma. He said how was it to work with Jayma and mess with Matt. John said he wasn’t sure if Matt was so happy when he joined Glee. 

John asked if Jenna and Kevin wanted to come see the Beach Boys when they play at the Hollywood Bowl. Kevin and Jenna said absolutely yes. Jenna said everyday before Emma was born she played her God Only Knows. She wanted to see if she recognized it and it would calm her after she was born. Kevin said so sweet and its one of the greatest songs of all time. John said it’s a perfect song. It was the first dance at his first wedding. He said the lyrics are harsher then you realize. I may not always love you is the first lyric. 

Back to Jayma and Matt. He said he remembers Ryan through him into a dance number. It was I’m A Slave 4 You when Heather as Brittany is practically grinding on John while he lays in that chair. He was like this is going to be a great job. He said you guys were so kind. Everyone was so sweet in the beginning. He said he couldn’t imagine what was going through their heads at that time. They had to be thinking all the time about what was next. Jenna said it was hard. They worked us to the bone and then on the weekends they had press. She said there was no break from each other or from the show. There was no breathing room to sit back and look back what they were doing. There was no reflection time. She said in many ways you were almost suffocated by it or at least that is how Jenna feels about it. Kevin said at the same time there job was to show up and work with people like John. He said it was very odd that people they looked up to wanted to be on a show that they were a part of even though the show was becoming big. 

Jenna brought up when John invited them to screen the Britney/Brittany episode at Jeff Davis house with his castmates from Full House. Jenna was like John buried the lead and they showed up at Jeff Davis house and were like what’s going on. John said he thinks he was the closest to Kevin and Jenna. 

John said Rocky Horror was the lure to get him on Glee. He said he remembers working with Lou, the head of wardrobe, and they made him a whole bustier. He said he remembers sitting with Ryan at Chateau Marmot and Ryan was like you know your whole stomach is going to be exposed. John said he pulled up his shirt and was like I have been working out, I look good right. Ryan was like don’t eat those fries. John said he did a fitting and took a bunch of pictures and what he heard is the network or studio saw and said you’ve got one straight guy on the show keep him out of women’s clothing. Then he was shifted over to doing Eddie. He asked what they knew. Kevin said he remembered John coming to them. He said John got how they worked because they all had to piece together intel from different departments. He said John would come to them and say this is what he heard. Jenna said she doesn’t think they ever got the real intel. John thinks he recorded Sweet Transvestite. 

John bought his current place from Adam Anders. There is a recording studio in the house. He said Darren and Lea have recorded stuff there. John said he remembers going to record Hot Patootie and he was like this was too high. They were like no you will be fine. John sang and they were like okay thanks we got it. Kevin said they can make anything work. John said that is when he fell in love with autotune. Kevin said autotune ruins you. John said on Broadway he just puts enough vibrato on it he would eventually hit the note. Jenna said remind me which shows you have done. She said she saw him in Nine. He said he was terrible in that show. He said his parents told him if you want do something then just do it. He said when he was done with Full House he asked Jack Klugman what he should do and Jack told him to go the theatre. He got a call to replace Matthew Broderick in How to Succeed. He said he looks back at things thinking where did I get the balls to do that, what was I thinking? Kevin said how was that for you. That he struggles with that himself where people are always telling him to do theatre but its terrifying to him. Jenna said you’d be great. Kevin said it is so the opposite of what he is used to doing. John said luckily he was coming from sitcoms that had a live audience and had been playing with the Beach Boys since 1985. He said he never thought he would be on Broadway one day or that he is a singer. He said Cabaret was the best thing in his life at the time. He said he was able to let go fully. Then he went to Nine. John told a story about after getting the show and seeing it was huge and his driver telling him he felt bad for whoever was taking over after Antonio. Jenna said it is a hard show. 

John said he was having a great time on Glee and then all of a sudden he was gone. Kevin said tale as old as time. Jenna said no that is what happens, storylines come and go. Jenna and Kevin said Ryan likes his people. Jenna talked about how Ryan was on the show and how he set the tone for the show. She said a lot of them have healed their relationships with him and their experience on the show after Naya died. Kevin said after Naya went missing Ryan started calling them. Kevin said they were so amped up with emotions that they just let it all out. He said Ryan was accepting to all that. Kevin said it was weird that it happened during that time. It felt good. They had conversations amongst themselves and with Ryan. Kevin and Jenna said the calls with Ryan were one on one. Jenna said she thinks a lot of them were waiting for him to open the door. 

(They get things wrong time wise when talking about Cory.) They talked about when Cory passed away. They said he passed away between season 3 and 4. They were right with the start of the season being pushed back. John asked how Ryan was then. Kevin said that was a very complicated time. Jenna mentioned that Ryan had said on the podcast Ryan felt a lot of responsibility and didn’t know how to handle it. It was really hard for him. Jenna said she felt like the show died when Cory died. Kevin said it did. It was hard to go back to these places they shared with Cory especially since he had such a big personality. Kevin said that for lack of a better word it was traumatic to be constantly reminded of this person that was no longer there. Jenna said the memorial they had for Cory in auditorium and then they had to back to being there and being okay with it. It was really hard and weird. John mentioned that there was only a handful of people that knew what they went through on the show and it had to be hard to lose one of those people. Kevin said he thinks they are still so close because they had each other to lean on through thick and thin. Kevin asked if that is how John is with everyone with Full House. John asked if there were talks about Glee coming back and joked that this was the announcement. 

John said the cast of Full House was abnormal. They were too close. It was a weird thing. Full House was successful but not the first year or two. It wasn’t like Glee which was a meteoric rise. John said him and Bob didn’t get along at all at the start. John came at from the angle of being an actor and wanting to make the scenes better and work on the emotion of the show. Bob just wanted to make dirty jokes and make the guy pulling the cable laugh. John said it was fun for awhile but it was also distracting and disruptive to everyone elses process. He said they didn’t really become close until after the show as done. He said Bob was very instrumental at keeping everyone together. He talked about Mary Kate and Ashley. He said they didn’t hate their childhood. He said he still talks to them. He said he thinks Glee was different. They were all unknown and then overnight became the biggest stars in the world. 

John said lets talk about our trip to Disneyland. Jenna said John is Disney’s #1 fan. Kevin said you are the Disney adult. John said he wanted to shake before he met his wife but she is worse then him. Kevin said it is a match made in heaven. He said before he met his wife he was like he has to drop this Disney stuff because he wanted to be serious actor. He said he was out to dinner with some people and Ryan Gosling was there. Ryan was like you are big Disney guy and said I love it. He has mix tapes for each ride. John was like really. he was like it didn’t hurt Ryan’s career. Chris was supposed to go with them and then it rained. Jenna said it was so much fun. Kevin said it was so great cause it was a bit of a shit show in the weather department but that made it so ME memorable. Jenna said it was more quiet then normal because of the rain. Kevin wasn’t out publicly at the time. Kevin said he had a come to Jesus moment with his then boyfriend, Marco, he was like look you need to reign it in. We are now friends with Stamos and play it cool.

Mike Love from the Beach Boys showed up. John introduced him to Jenna and Kevin. John said how Mike does a joke every night. John tells him to dedicate Surfer Girls to all the girls in the audience and he says this song is dedicated to all the ladies from John. Everyone screams and John says a couple of guys too and Mike said a couple of guys too. Mike said since John did Glee he has been dedicating songs to guys. Jenna said I am a big fan. Kevin said it is an honor to meet you. He said Mike is a legend and you are more talented then rest of us all combined. Mike said he is the Mount Rushmore of rock. John said you should be and that he is one of the greatest. Mike talked about John being on General Hospital. John talked about his first show with the Beach Boys and how huge the crowed was that night.

John talked about how Mike is responsible for the most optimistic beautiful music. When they wrote it in the 60s it was powerful and even more so today. Kevin said there is a reason those songs are still gigantic today. People need them. Mike said a researcher in England said Good Vibrations came it at number one for making people feel good. Kevin said it was named appropriately. Jenna said she listens to his music on the regular. John mentioned Jenna saying she played God Only Knows everyday when pregnant with Emma. John mentioned how I may not always love you is not a good first line. Mike said I didn’t write that part. He said people use it in their weddings and are foretelling their divorce. John mentioned how it was his first dance at his first wedding. Kevin said he will be front row at the Hollywood Bowl with Mike’s name painted on his chest. Jenna and Kevin said so nice to meet you. 

John talked about his memoir If You Would Have Told Me. He said his first concert was the Beach Boys and would not have believed you if you told him he would get to play with them one day. He said he looks back and says he is so grateful for everything. He brought up Jenna jumping on her trampoline everyday. Jenna says she does it so she can look as good at John at that age. 

They moved on to talking about John’s book. He had offers to write a book a few times. He said he isn’t that interesting. He said after Bob died and his parents he decided to do it. He said he tried to find things that were relatable to other people. Jenna said she can’t wait to read the book. It comes out in October. Jenna said it must have been therapeutic and cathartic to write the book. 

Jenna said congrats on your show. He gets to work with Jessalyn and Keala Settle. 

John said lets zoom again the three of us sometime. He said he was nervous coming into Glee and Jenna and Kevin were so kind to him. He said they stayed in touch but more with Jenna and Kevin. He joked that he likes Jenna more because Kevin ignored him when he went gay. Jenna was laughing historically. Kevin said I knew I didn’t have a chance so never mind. John said he is proud of Kevin. He said he loves Jenna. Kevin said thank you so much. Jenna said have a great tour. Kevin said make sure everyone goes and pre-orders your book.

Jenna asked Kevin if he can believe they had a Beach Boy and John Stamos in one interview. Kevin said his face hurts from smiling. He got goosebumps and was sweating. Jenna said they were in the presence of greatness. Jenna said she is holding John to his word about going to the Beach Boys. Kevin said Austin and Jenna’s husband can watch Emma. He said they are going all three nights. 

Kevin thanked John for being so open and honest. Jenna said he is just a good human. He is so famous like the mecca of famous but look at the kind, appreciative, and generous man that he is with his big big heart. Jenna reminded Kevin that John likes her more. Kevin said he has good taste and he understands. Kevin said to still be that nice after people come up to him everyday is truly a wonder to see and he can’t believe they get to call him a friend. 

Well that is all until next time. 

[rainswept]

ngl i had to take a fat nap after that response ☹️

i have genuinely never felt so overwhelmed with emotion before, now we're in the same boat because i don't even know what to say to tell you exactly how much i enjoyed reading all of it. i got that whole eyes burning going on n shit and im having a very fun awesome time trying to put a name to whatever the feeling in my chest is (not), but love sounds like a nice way to put it so we'll go with that! i love you too, and appreciate the time you took to write everything out more than any sentence can convey the full meaning of

you're right about me not expecting my ask to mean so much, i wrote it because i knew most authors (and creators as a whole) like hearing how their viewers discover their work. you said you were curious in the notes of the url post, i thought i might as well send in my story to satisfy.

it would be a big step for me, but also a chance to say something nice to someone who inspired me and then move on after a “thank you” or vague acknowledgement to… prove to myself interacting isnt as bad as i thought it'd be?? something like that. i’m not sure what i wanted you to say, or how i wanted to feel about it

bbuut as per usual, you managed to surprise me no matter what i was looking for ( ‾́ ◡ ‾́ ) and it wasn't all over the place or hard to understand at all. my turn to be dramatic:

“what is the point of feeling if, as soon as you pry your eyes away from the page, the emotion fades with the ink?” is definitely a question i connect with. impressionable teenager check ‼️

i said i want to love like you because the way you dedicate yourself so completely is something i’ve never been able to do. i wasn't into picking apart characters before because i thought it was obsessive.

they aren't real right? who cares? which leads me to the metaphor i used for your writing: wholly consuming. imagine not being able to delve into those depths. of course it feels uncomfortable to be pulled under the waves at first— you aren't going to be able to breathe— but the underwater life has so much to offer. i know it now, because i’ve seen that unknowable infinity in your work and in your passion. and there's so much more to sea (ba dum tiss). thank you so much for showing me that

love changes a lot of people. it is sacrifice, and you often have to make compromises. so why not let myself be devoured by that endlessness? i would rather suffer, be swallowed by the ocean and have all of my soft edges filed into jagged pieces by the currents than to have never known that pain at all. because it changed me. i want to remember that.

i want to remember your words, and the part you played even if i am left with only hurt, because love is also giving. it's greed knows no bounds. it's scary, the only thing i had to offer was myself and my experience. but it's getting easier. i’m happy to be seen as a member of your audience, and will applaud every success long after our interests no longer align because that is my compromise for you ♥(ˆ⌣ˆ)

hope all that makes sense. i like the umbrella tag! i’m being perceived and i haven't exploded (yet) (destruction is imminent) ☂️

ANON i am so sorry for the late response i had to process this. i’m having such a hard time posting these bc i just want to keep them treasured in my inbox forever ugh

long post again

ANYWAY. you’re so poetic this is insane. hello???//?/? when i first saw this there were tears in my eyes literally. i cannot. the first paragraph. actually all of them. i . died?? goodbye?? this is the end of me as i know it. i will never be the same. these r the most impactful words anyone has ever said to me i think. i have no words. genuinely no words i’m going to melt into thr floor. plea. please. spare me anon. spare me. i’m in agony right now ur writing is so beautiful. ANONNNNN😭😭😭😭😭😭 god i will never recover. i am in tears

“i said i want to love like you because the way you dedicate yourself so completely is something i’ve never been able to do. i wasn't into picking apart characters before because i thought it was obsessive. they aren't real right? who cares?”

i get that, in a way. but as you said — “which leads me to the metaphor i used for your writing: wholly consuming.” — that’s how it feels to me, too, and it always has. i get the idea of thinking something isn’t important because it’s not real, but i’ve always latched onto them regardless. so i had to write, honestly. to get it out. because otherwise it would consume me instead. it sounds very dramatic, i’m aware, but it’s true — i have so many feelings surrounding these fictional pixels and stories and they have so much to offer and they take up too much space in my brain and if i do not talk about it i will Explode ™️. Or Implode ™️. so i write! because i want to. because i have to. because otherwise it will Swallow Me Whole. and i’d rather embrace it! i’ve always been an ‘obsessive’ person when it comes to interests — it’s all or nothing for me. so it’s one or the other — i can drown or i can swim, but i can’t really get out of the water of my own volition,,, and i’d rather not drown. so i’m both glad i inadvertently introduced you to that way of seeing things, and regret it, because it does hurt sometimes. but it’s worth it to me, and it seems like it is to you too, so that’s good!

ONCE AGAIN i could copy and paste this entire ask and comment on it but i fear it’ll just be me repeating your sentences and gawking at them and it would get way too long. 😭😭😭😭 so i’ll just let your ask speak for itself

“i’m being perceived and i haven't exploded (yet) (destruction is imminent) ☂️” also we can explode together actually. i’m glad u allowed urself to be perceived because. oh my god. 😭😭😭😭 this ask changed the trajectory of my life forever. half joke. destruction is not imminent you’ve got this

also, you’re definitely more than just a member of my audience now, in my opinion. if you do decide to stick around (and i hope you do), i hope we can become friends eventually too! even if you decide not to, these interactions have meant more to me than you know! so thank you, either way

[cremisino]

@tribunale

❝"I used to believe that myself," says Diavolo, with a modicum of sympathy amidst the apathy induced by all his deathless deaths. "That I would not give up. That there had to be a way back to the top, to recover my throne... I am not so sure anymore. It seems… we have lost the favor of fate itself."

Lost it to Giorno Giovanna, he thinks, bitterly. Through all this time, he still does not understand how he could fall from grace the way he did. How a mere child could dethrone him. And how fate, in the end, discarded him in favor of another.

"You still don't get it, do you?" Solido asks "his" Diavolo, aloud. "All that bullshit about being favored? It was all just that: bullshit. There was never any fucking favor, how could there have been when we grew up the way e did? You just got in way over your head with your new power. Had to mow down everything that challenged you, didn't you? Face it, brother, you were wrong," Solido's expression sours even futher. "I can't believe you still don't fucking get that. Can't admit it, even now."

Diavolo, to his credit, feels offended. "Everything I did was for a reason! There was a point to stay at the apex! So nobody could-… So we wouldn't-… All I did, I did to protect-"

"Shut it! I don't give a fuck if you genuinely thought this was all to protect us. My ass that it was! In the end you failed us!," Solido is fuming now, bringing that anger coursing in their veins to the surface, in an explosion of rage and tears. "You failed to protect Doppio, you failed to protect me, and you failed to protect your own fucking self. And you know why? Because once you had a taste of all that power, it changed you! You were an addict as much as me. As much as the people who bought your dope. But your drug wasn't any coke, ti wasn't heroin, it was all that fucking power. Staying at the fucking top. Paranoid that it was gonna be taken away from you. No fucking wonder it was. I fucking knew this was gonna happen one day, but you and King Crimson just had to keep me out of the way, huh?"

"You would have killed us both had I not done so! Do you truly think keeping you dormant was my first choice?" Diavolo explodes back, ignoring the biting criticism of Solido's words, wanting to accuse him back, wanting to justify himself. "You courted death on a daily basis, you would have thrown our lives away because of the past. I chose to burn it down, I chose to erase it, whereas you were stuck inside it, and wanted to die because of it. You are my brother, and I love you, but you gave me no choice! You endangered us all, Solido!"

They've had this argument before. It always ends the same. It's as much a loop as their endless deaths. Something inside him churns each time, like a heartbreak happening over and over again. Like they're breaking apart at the seams, and, one day, they'll come undone and disappear.

It's the only display of emotion they seem to know now.

"And you fucking didn't? Look at us! If I'd done it, at least we'd only have died once! You fucking cunt!" Solido shouts in response, and then they both remember they were not alone. They slowly move their eyes to gaze upon the other Diavolo, their mirror, their twin.

"Fuck!" muffled into their forearm, Solido screams, but as he does, so does Diavolo, and so do all the parts of him, all in pain, all in misery.

[ere-the-sun-rises]

I got viral meningitis one summer. A very common and easily identifiable sympton of meningitis is intense and consistent pain in the neck and upper shoulders which is not affected by pain medication.

I also have benign hypermobility, meaning my ligaments (the litte chords that help your joints move and attach your muscles to your joints) are so loose that they don't function properly. As a consequence, I am naturally very bendy. My joints grind sometimes and my muscles have to work twice as hard to do basic, everyday movements. Its very easy for me to get muscle injuries/tears and I experience constant fatigue. Sometimes I also get very strong, very sudden bouts of pain that render the affected limb useless.

I had meningitis for two and a half months without realizing it. I went to my doc about the increasing pain, but because I could still put a bra on, he just prescribed stronger meds and told me to tell him if I lost mobility. Then, in the last two days preceeding The Climax, I got "a cold" . Fevers I couldn't shake, headaches, disorientation, nausea, cold sweats, weakness - the lot. Then, on the last night, I started to shake. Uncontrollable, violent shakes that rattled through my bed and vibrated my picture frames. The nausea was so much worse, I could barely talk or drink without having to stifle the urge to vomit. I had stopped eating and couldn't get out of bed. My mom encouraged me to just let it out, not to fight it. So I threw up, three times, and the shaking stopped. Then I started losing consciousness. I only recall fragments of the paramedics in my house and the ride down to the hospital. I woke up in the emergency room, hooked up to saline, antivirals and antibiotics. I have no idea how long it took me to recover coherent thoughts beyond basic awareness or control of my body.

Apparently, once I started fading, my fever exploded and I started sweating go much I was slippery to the touch in minutes. The paramedics couldn't register a pulse, and my BPM was 250, 280 when I was admitted to the hospital. The paramedics told my mom that if we hadn't have lived so close to a hospital, I would have died on the way. From the placing of the ambulance call to my admission, it was 8 minutes.

I lived with a pain so intense and debilitating that any abled person would never have reached my state. For months, I carried on through it with the same level of productivity as always. I thought it was unusually strong, but didn't give it much thought.

The entire event re-contextualized how I saw my own pain. It scared the shit out of me that something so serious could linger for so long as I had no way of distinguishing it from my normal operating procedure. I was so used to this, so used to the background radiation of agony that I didn't notice an assassin loudly and obviously announcing its presence.

And let me be clear, I got extremely lucky. Viral meningitis does this slow burn turned instant kill attack, but bacterial meningitis eats away at your brain, brain stem and the interior of your spine. I could have let bacterial meningitis cause irreversible damage without ever knowing it simply because I don't register pain like a normal human being. My disability put my life in danger.

So, when a disabled person tells you that they can't, they can't. Those of us with chronic pain exist beyond abled imaginations of pain tolerance. Even those of us who are highly conscious of what our limits should be and abide by them operate by a completely different metric than abled people. It doesn't matter what their disability is or how they got it, respect them when they tell you no.

i cant stress this enough, disabled people know their own limits. i fucking promise you. we are not being lazy or jerks because we won't do something YOU want us to do or something YOU THINK will make us feel better. it wont. stop.

[katsu28]

ghost of you

JJ Maybank x Ghost of You by 5 Seconds of Summer

summary: JJ copes with Y/N’s death but like inspired fr om lyrics from Ghost of You

warnings: alcohol, mentions of death, light swearing (like three words), just general angst (if i missed anything pls let me know!)

a/n: Hooray for my first post on this site, but in all honesty I actually hated myself for writing this at 3AM but it was sad boi hours 🥲 also this is probably like partially non-canon JJ bc idk if he’d want kids, but the rest of it is kind of canon I guess?

Also I actually got the inspiration for this from reading another post on here that kinda had the same concept but I forgot exactly who it was...if anyone even sees this and knows who or what I’m talking about, lmk and I’ll give credits!

here i am waking up, still can’t sleep on your side

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. You and JJ had plans for your future; silly delusions that the two of you conjured up on nights when you would lay in bed wrapped up in each other’s embrace. You were gonna go to college, JJ would study to become a mechanic, and you’d share a little apartment in whatever place you decided to settle down in. Somewhere near a beach definitely, so the two of you could always get your surf fix. You’d get a dog—a big one, not one of those tiny yappy ones, JJ said. Then eventually, when the time was just right—after you’d graduated and JJ opened his own garage—you’d have kids. One boy, one girl; one happy family.

JJ never expected he’d lose you before all your dreams came true, and now he couldn’t even sleep in the bed you used to share. Not when every time he breathed in, all he was hit with was the scent of you. Of what he no longer had.

there’s your coffee cup, the lipstick stain fades with time

Time. That’s what everyone said he needed. Time to recover, time to rebuild—time to forget. But how could JJ forget when everywhere he looked, he was reminded of you? Your mugs in the kitchen cabinet, the ones that you would make stupid faces at him from behind the steam of your coffee every morning. Your sweaters and shirts thrown around on the floor in the closet, where you always yelled at JJ to help you pick out an outfit for date night, flipping him off when he told you you’d look beautiful in anything and everything you wore. And especially the little notes that you’d always leave tucked into the pockets of his shorts or under the brim of his hats—tiny scraps of paper that reminded him to have a good day, or to tell him that you loved him, or even just a stupid joke that always made him chuckle when he felt down. Every note, he saved, because he couldn’t bear to throw them away, even after you were gone.

If time was what it took to forget you, then JJ wished he could stop it.

if i can dream long enough, you’d tell me i’d be just fine

You were JJ’s rock—the one thing that kept him tethered to the ground and kept him from exploding. Every time he got too worked up, or when his dad was being an even bigger piece of shit than normal, or even just when you noticed he was a little on edge, you’d always take his hand and place it on your chest; right above your heart, telling him that as long as he could feel your heart beating under his fingertips, you were gonna make sure he was just fine.

Oh, what a cruel and painful memory it was now.

Now, JJ could only feel your heart beating in his dreams, and it wasn’t the same. Not by a long shot. He could hear your voice telling him he’d be just fine, but that was a fucking lie. Nothing would ever be just fine, because life was nothing without you.

so i drown it out, like i always do; dancing through our house, with the ghost of you

JJ drowned his sorrows in the only way he knew how to cope—by getting blasted and drunk every night—to the point where he couldn’t sleep otherwise. Not here, not in this house that was no longer a home since you died. He couldn’t bear to be in the place that had since grown cold unless he was super fucking hammered. Because sometimes, if he smoked just enough weed and downed just enough alcohol, JJ swore he could see you dancing around like you always used to do. And those were the only times he would really smile—dancing through the house with drunken hallucinations of his dead girlfriend instead of facing the fact that you were really gone.

Because if he had to do that, oh god—JJ wasn’t sure he’d survive. Not without you.

[trixree]

I just read your fem! Zoro + zosan fic and died a thousand times. I think that's a hallmark to how well you understand his character that you can change him in such a dramatic way but still write him sooooooo in character 🥰🥰🥰 you're literally my favorite OP writer forever. Also because I'm a sucker for characters and dynamic analysis (and LuSan as well) how do you think fem! Luffy and regular Sanji would work? You're the best 🥳🥳

JDFKLAJDGHKLJSG THANK YOU SHUT UP HOW DARE YOU THANK YOU I'LL NEVER RECOVER FROM THIS KINDNESS

That is such an interesting question... so I can't really see Luffy as presenting in a hyperfeminine way or identifying as a woman, that's kinda my own bias here. I tend to handcanon Luffy as nonbinary/agender but he just goes by he/him because it's easier and it's how people have always referred to him. I can't see him really aligning with ANY gender identity strongly? Like he's just Luffy and that's that. The he/him has little to do with gender and more with convenience.

So I'm gonna spin this question "what about Sanji/AFAB-Luffy"? And my answer to THAT is...

Sanji probably doesn't even realize Luffy is AFAB until a few weeks into sailing with the crew, at least. Probably not until Reverse Mountain. And it explodes his entire worldview. He probably panics and starts trying to treat Luffy like Nami, which is EXTREMELY confusing for everyone involved. Luffy is like "cool! More food!" but eventually gets irritated with Sanji's insistence that he never lift a finger or fight and can't be pirate "KING" because he's a QUEEN so eventually, much like in my woman!Zoro fic, Luffy solves this

By making Sanji fight him

And the eventual Conversation happens during this fight (which is more Sanji having to come up with increasingly creative ways to dodge Luffy's attacks) and goes like this:

Sanji: I won't hit a woman!

Luffy: I'M LUFFY

Sanji: YOU ARE A WOMAN

Luffy: NO SHUT UP I'M LUFFY

Sanji: YOU ARE LITERALLY FEMALE

Luffy: WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN SANJI??? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?????

Sanji: *spluttering, unable to answer in a way that is not the antithesis of who Luffy is*

Luffy: *lands a punch in all the confusion*

Sanji: *strikes back out of instict, freezes*

Luffy: Did that change who I am? Who you are?

Sanji: I-

Luffy: Did hitting me, a "woman", change either of us?

Sanji: .... no

Luffy: I'm just me, Sanji. And you're just you.

Anyways Robin probably has to sit Sanji down with some queer theory before he has the tools to wrap his head around Luffy and his attraction to him, let alone act on it. Luffy just doesn't have the investment in or language to explain/articulate his experience of gender.

[askbohemiancompany]

Hope(Less)

It had been some time since everyone had come back from the gala. Fun was had by all, but now the crushing responsibilities of everyone who had gone had to be caught up with. 

More specifically, Gwen wanted to put some serious effort into finding Floyd’s killer. She had her fun, got to act goofy even. However, it was time to get back on task. 

The gothitelle knew if she went at it alone, she would get hard checked by the dusknoir. Considering the mon’s abilities regarding portals played in how Floyd was killed based off the autopsy report, Gwen knew she had to have back up. And she knew just the person to help, someone with a similar agenda as her.

“Hey Len. I have a proposition for you.” Gwen signaled the hawlucha over towards her room. This surprised the hawlucha, as Gwen never usually reached out to her first on mutual matters. It was usually Grohl she reached out to first. 

The hawlucha entered her room, which was still like an H&M exploded. Clothing was in piles on the floor, and on her bed were a series of papers. On a desk, there sat the bucket head mask and bucket, which were separated. The flying type just made a mental note of that for later.

“What did you need?” Lenox sounded patient, despite Gwen and her usual rapor. Aside from some odd or boisterous moments at the Mask Gala, the psychic had been well-behaved. So the benefit of the doubt was more than earned.

“Listen. I have been thinking about something,” instinctively, she pulled out her carton of cigarettes. Then, after a brief pause, put them away. “It's about that loose end we both mutually have. That one dusknoir, the one that had a hand in killing your family right?”

Attention now firmly on the markswoman, the brawler was now interesting. “I’m listening.”

Uncharacteristically, Gwen did not give a smile when this was acknowledged. “We both have a mutual reason to want her dead. She had a hand in killing your family. She had a hand in killing Floyd. I think once we receive word of any sighting on her, we should both team up in killing her.”

Killing Floyd? To Lenox’s surprise, she was very adamant about the dusknoir being the killer. The autopsy pointed towards the dusknoir, given how she fought back during the attack on Arcadium. However, the question should at least be presented, to make sure Gwen even considered the prospect.

“Gwen. Please don’t take this the wrong way. I am all for teaming up with you to kill her, but…have you considered the potential if she did not kill Floyd? I know everything is pointing towards her, given how Floyd died, but what if it is someone else?”

Gwen shrugged. “I mean. If it fit, we have to make the hit. Plus even if it isn’t her, at least we get to help you. So no matter what, we get rid of someone who was causing problems for you, well us. ”

There was still the issue of the blasé way Gwen brought this up, however Lenox was not objecting to this plan. She did want to avenge her family, eliminate someone who was a fugitive, and finally get some synergy with Gwen after years of working together.

“I don’t object. Thank you Gwen.” Lenox sounded more gentle and apprehensive. There were still things around the dusknoir that she wanted to be aware of. Keenan’s location, why they did what they did, and the group’s connection to Roldabonz and OPP. She could not shake that, plus out of everything that had happened in the last few years. It had fallen out as a priority for Lenox. Everything had changed, but this one thing. It felt like she was only doing this out of an attempt to try to have a better rapport with Gwen.

Lenox truly felt no hope for her situation, if nothing she felt fear and self loathing.

Elsewhere, in a separate forest several miles away from White Forest, the subject of the merc’s conversation, Delasol, was floating alone. By this point, she was recovering from the injury Floyd left her when she escaped to where it did not hurt anymore to float. No longer did she have stability issues since she recovered from ectoplasm loss. Dela was used to having these bouts, especially since she was not immune to having bouts of dizziness. 

After all, the dusknoir was never without injury when she was assisting Keenan with their raids.

This got her to thinking, where was Keenan? They had been separated this whole time, for this long amount of years and no response had come up. Keenan should have at least been causing some kind of commotion when they would do what they did commonly, cause death.

When it came to Keenan’s drive, it left her envious. They were never resting, they were always planning for the next raid, or how to stick it to OPP. This will was also extended to the others; if anyone wanted it or not. She could attest from all the mental rewiring that was constantly needed to be done to Okyasu to keep him from running away.

Their psychic abilities were to be respected. During their more intimate moments, Keenan would use her telepathy to calm Dela’s nerves before they would do a raid. It was also used during their more intimate moments and heart to hearts.

While the specter had been away from most social media and news for a while, the odds of her own bounty being taken down were low. She needed to reunite with Keenan…or did she? After this entire time separated from the galladvoir the only time any sort of conflict came to her was because of something Keenan ordered her to do.

Any bit of violence that has happened to her was always a result of Keenan’s orders or doing something for Keenan. Granted, her murdering the assassin was to genuinely avenge Okyasu, whom Dela did decide to allow to flee because at the time of the attack everything truely had gone south, she wanted to at least get him away from being killed. Which did not do him any good. She never should have left his side, maybe then it would have saved him.

Keenan should have never let him get dragged further into this cycle. It was not like Keenan and how Dela were. They had met each other and masterminded the escape from OPP. Dela felt she should try to reunite with Keenan…but only to close their matter.

Despite how heavy the deck was stacked against the ghost type, Dela just appreciated the few moments of calm that she had not seen in almost 2 decades. She should take her time in finding Keenan, just to allow herself time to think on her next course of action.

For once, she actually felt hope, cautious, but hope was there, but also a sense of independence away from Keenan.

(Delasol is available for asks)

(My extremely late post for @asksavel hope event)