#exo bodyguard au

[nanawritesit]

Bodyguard!Baekhyun x Pregnant!Reader: Angst to Fluff

Anonymous said: “Hi! Could you write cold/bodyguard Baekhyun and pregnant reader? Baekhyun doesn't want the baby but reader resists. No angst end pleaseee. 😢”

TW: fem!reader, domestic angst, mentions of contraception, pregnancy, sex, and violence. brief mentions of suicide

——————

Your heart was beating out of your chest. Your palms were sweating profusely. You were shaking like a leaf.

You tried your best to ignore your growing anxiety, mindlessly going through the motions to prepare dinner for you and your husband. Of course he didn’t expect you to, but you wanted to surprise him. Especially because you were planning on presenting some big news to him. You might be pregnant.

To be honest, you weren’t sure how Baekhyun was going to act. He was religious about using condoms and always asked if you were taking your pills, so part of you was worried he absolutely did not want a baby. On the other hand, when you first got married he would sometimes fantasize about moving somewhere far away with you and starting a family. You didn’t know what to expect tonight, so you were obviously very nervous.

“Baby I’m home-“ a voice boomed from the entrance of your home. You croaked out a simple “kitchen” in response. You heard him set down his bag and begin to take off his boots, and after a while he appeared in your doorway. He was dressed in all black, like usual. God, he looked so rugged and strong. It’s no wonder you were knocked up. “Hey beautiful. How was your day?” he asked, coming up behind you to kiss your cheek.

“Oh…. the usual…” you lied, setting down your spatula. “Dinner’s almost ready.”

He was resting his head on your shoulder, lips pressing against your neck in the form of a few short kisses. “You didn’t have to cook, baby.” he chuckled.

“I know, I just thought it sounded… nice tonight.” you lied once again, nervously pushing yourself out of his grasp and huffing over to the other counter to cut up some vegetables. “You should go wash up, I’m almost done.”

“Yes ma’am.” he laughed, confused but going along.

You heaved a sigh of relief as he left the kitchen, busying yourself with setting the table. Soon he was back from the washroom and fixing up a plate. You both took your seats at the table and began eating dinner. You were too anxious to eat normally, picking at your food and taking small bites. He was the opposite, ravenously devouring the meat and vegetables with rice.

“You’re hungry today.” you commented, trying to make conversation to calm your nerves.

“Yeah, I am.” he chuckled, taking a sip of water. “Work was so rough today. Some crazy fan jumped at my client and I had to hold him off.”

“That sounds scary, are you okay?” you asked, concerned.

“Oh yeah, he wasn’t armed or anything. I guess I should’ve mentioned that.” he laughed at himself, and you joined him in spite of your anxiety.

“Yeah, just give your poor wife a heart attack why don’cha.” you giggled, pushing your plate away from you.

He looked up at you. “You done eating already?”

“Yeah, I’m not feeling too good tonight…” you told him. It wasn’t a huge lie, you did have a decent stomachache. That’s what led you to buy a pregnancy test in the first place.

You continued listening to him talk about his day at work, laughing at the funny parts and gasping at his stories of crazy people. Being married to a bodyguard was always interesting to say the least. Of course, it worried you how dangerous his line of work was, but you knew how much he loved it, and it at least gave you some interesting conversations. Before you knew it, he was done eating.

“That was delicious baby, thank you for cooking dinner.” he complimented you, reaching across the table to pat your hand. “Hey, do you wanna go get some ice cream for dessert? I’ll pay.”

“No I’m okay honey, like I said I don’t feel very good.” you told him.

“Man, you must be sick if you’re turning down ice cream.” he chuckled, giving your hand a light squeeze.

“Yeah, that’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about…” you began, sitting up in your chair.

“What, are you sick or something?” he asked, slightly concerned.

“Not exactly…” you explained, feeling your stomach tie into a knot. “I don’t know how to lead into this, so I guess I’ll just come out and say it. Baekhyun, I’m pregnant.”

He completely froze up. He didn’t move a single muscle for what felt like ages, then he just clicked his lips and brought a hand up to rub his brow bone. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I think you heard me Baek.” you laughed nervously.

“Are you absolutely sure?” he asked, looking into your eyes intensely. He wasn’t showing any emotion at all, which made it very hard to gauge his reaction.

“Babe I peed on like four sticks and they all said the same thing.” you blurted put, starting to feel defensive.

“I don’t understand. We use condoms every time we have sex.” he began, getting up and rushing to the bathroom to grab the box.

You sighed and rolled your eyes, then got up to follow after him. “Honey you know those only work like 98% of the time right?”

You found him in the bathroom, sifting through the trash with the box of condoms next to him. “There must have been a hole in it or something. I swear to God when I find that thing I’m gonna sue the company.”

“Baekhyun what is the big deal!” you asked, tugging on his shoulder. “Why can’t you just accept it?”

“Because I don’t want a baby right now Y/N!” he snapped, whipping around to look at you. There was an awkward moment of silence between the two of you, the tension in the room just having reached its climax.

“You don’t?” you asked meekly, swallowing the lump in your throat.

“Y/N, we’ve talked about this…” he sighed, getting up to stand in front of you. “I have no business being a father when I work in such a dangerous environment.”

“Okay, so do I not have any say in whether or not I want to be a mother?” you asked, starting to get angry.

“That’s not what I said.” he stated flatly. “Do you know what it’s like to go to work every day and know that you might get hurt, or even killed? Now imagine having that knowledge with a family involved. If anything happens to me, this kid doesn’t have a dad anymore. Do you want that for them?”

You started to feel tears prick at your eyes. You bit your lip and looked at the ground, choking down the sobs that threatened to erupt from your throat. “Do you not consider me your family?” you asked finally.

His mouth dropped open a tiny bit at the accusation, baffled that he had implied such a thing. “Yes, I do. I don’t know why I said it that way, but that’s not what I meant.”

“Because maybe you shouldn’t have married me if you’re so worried about dying everyday!” you shrieked, finally snapping. The tears were streaming down your face like a waterfall and you could hardly breathe. You wanted to scream.

“Honey, I-“ he reached a hand out towards you, but you pushed his arm away and shoved your way past him and out of the bathroom.

Baekhyun immediately turnt around and tried to follow you into your bedroom, but you were too quick to slam the door behind you and lock it.

“Babe!” he pleaded, fiddling with the door knob and knocking urgently. When you have no response, he sighed and rested his head on the door. “Okay… I can see we’re not getting anywhere like this. I’ll give you some time to yourself. I’m gonna go take a walk. I love you.”

——————

Baekhyun didn’t know how to feel as he walked through the park. He never liked seeing you upset, and he tried his best to never be the reason. But he just couldn’t accept the idea of having children.

It wasn’t that he didn’t like kids… he got along with them just fine. And he’d be lying if he said he didn’t fantasize from time to time about starting a family with you. However, he thought that was as far as it should go. Fantasies, not reality.

He exhaled into the cold air, hands shoved in the pockets of his leather jacket, before plopping down on a park bench to collect his thoughts. As he was disassociating, he noticed a man and a woman playing with what looked like their young daughter. She had to be around five years old. They all looked so happy.

He knew he eventually wanted kids. Just not now. Work was too stressful.

But when was it not going to be? Was there ever really going to be a good time to have a baby?

Baekhyun began to look closer at the man. He wondered if he had any worries about his capabilities as a father. Did he ever regret settling down?

He took one last look at his face, and noticed the bright smile upon it. As the man stared at the woman and child next to him, he looked as if he had everything he ever wanted right in front of him. It was honestly pretty easy to envision himself as the man, and you as the woman. He really liked thinking about what your child would look like. What features of his they would have, and which of yours… raising them, protecting them, and keeping them safe…

That was something he was confident he could do. He kept people safe all day at work. He also enjoyed feeling like he protected you and your home. Would it really be so difficult to add a little one to his list? People tried so hard to have kids everyday, and you were both just given one with hardly any effort.

He knew you would be a terrific mother. He saw the way you looked at other parents with their children… the loving sparkle in your eyes when you played with kids. You wanted it more than anything, but with him always shying away from the idea, you never talked about it.

It was then that he realized, he could give you that. In fact, he already had. You were probably so excited to tell him, and with the way he reacted…. oh god, he felt just horrible. He immediately sprung up and started jogging back to your apartment.

———————

“Baby?” he cried out as he burst through the front door of your home. He wanted to see you so bad that he didn’t even bother to take off his boots or jacket.

He instinctively started running for the bedroom, as it was the last place he saw you. But as soon as he got there, the door was open and you were nowhere to be seen. He glanced over to the bathroom to see the door shut, signaling that you were in there.

“Baby!” he called for you, reaching for the doorknob. The door was locked, and you weren’t answering. All he could hear was the water running, so he immediately assumed the worst.

“Y/N!” he exclaimed, pounding on the door rapidly. He was freaking out. He knew what he had to do. He took a few steps back, then leapt forward and broke the door open.

You jumped at the sudden intrusion from your place in the bathtub.

“Baekhyun what the hell!” you shrieked, ripping your earbuds out of your ears.

He breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of you. “You weren’t answering and I heard the water running, so I was worried…”

“Oh my gosh, no. I’m not going to drown myself just because you don’t want our baby.” you huffed. “I just wanted to take a bubble bath to clear my head.”

He kneeled down next to the tub and reached for your hand. You hesitated, but let him hold it.

“Y/N, I want to have this baby with you.” he told you.

“Do you actually?” you asked sharply, shooting daggers at him with your gaze. “Or are you just telling me that to make me happy? I’m only going to raise this kid with you if we both want it.”

“No, I’m not saying I’ll just be ‘okay’ with it. I genuinely want to be a father. ” he reassured you, reaching forward to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear.

You looked over him suspiciously. “What changed your mind?”

He placed his hand softly on your cheek. “When I was at the park, I saw a family playing together. They looked so happy together. I started to think of all the wonderful things I’d gain from being a father. All the memories we could make as a family, all the love we have to share with our child…”

You started to relax into his touch, leaning more towards him. “What kind of memories?”

“Teaching our kid how to walk and talk, taking them to school, taking them to the park…” he started listing, looking at you with an excited sparkle in his eyes. “I’d like to take them to Disney World. We can all make breakfast together, throw them birthday parties, read them stories…”

You smiled at him lovingly. “You’ll be an amazing dad Baekhyun.”

“And you are going to be the most amazing mother in the world.” he continued. “You’re so kind, and patient, and smart, and strong… I hope our baby is just like you.” He suddenly plunged one of his hands under the water to touch your tummy. “I’m so excited to go on this journey with you Y/N. I’m so sorry my first reaction was so horrible.”

“You’d better be.” you teased, splashing some water up at him. “Every woman’s worst nightmare is getting pregnant and the father wanting nothing to do with them. I was worried I was going to have to leave you and move in with my mother!”

He laughed at you, wiping the water off of his cheek. “I promise you, as long as I’m living, I’ll be by your side. I’ll take you to all your doctors appointments, buy you all the food you’re craving, give you back rubs… You won’t have to lift a finger for the next nine months. And if you go into labor while I’m at work, I’ll just tell my client they’ll have to protect themselves and hop in a cab.”

You giggled as you imagined the scenario. “Well you don’t have to do that, but I appreciate the sentiment. I’m so glad you’re ready to start a family.”

“I really am.” he told you. He leaned forward to place a tender kiss on your lips. “Now, would you like some company in that big lonely tub?”

“Yes I would.” you chirped in reply.

Maybe telling your husband about your pregnancy didn’t go exactly as you’d planned. But the two of you never really went the traditional route anyway. You knew that the two of you could overcome any obstacle, big or small. All you needed was each other. Soon, you would be parents. And you couldn’t wait to meet your little baby.

[screaming-for-eternally]

Awoken Exo Cayde AU

Aka an AU I screamed at the Content Box @orbdotexe @formallyacrypitd and @luna-light-eclipse about  The gist of it is:  -Cayde ends up stowing away on the escape ship that Mara and Uldren were on, and gets caught up in the whole Collapse thing -Mara figures she can make this loser useful and makes him Uldren’s bodyguard. -Cayde and Uldren end up becoming best friends...but like the kind of best friends who bully and bicker with each other. Uldren keeps calling Cayde ‘stowaway’ while Cayde keeps pranking Uldren.  -Also, thanks to the whole light and dark thing that created the Awoken, Cayde is shinier and glowier than your average exo. And he Awoken just think all exos are like that-until they run into another one and wonder why they don’t shine. -This shine, amusingly enough, nearly blinds the entire Awoken Royal Court, so they end up having to cover Cayde head to toe in matt powder. -Now, while Mara tolerates Cayde’s...eccentircities due to the fact he’s good at his job, and while he does get along well enough with Uldren and Petra, near everyone else in the Reef mistrusts him as an outsider. -When it comes to Guardians, Cayde’s closeness to Uldren ends up coloring his views on them-he doesn’t hate them as much as the Prince, and is more than willing to put on a friendly face for them, he doesn’t exactly trust them.  -Anyways, Oryx happens and Mara ‘dies’. Riven gets into Uldren’s head, causing him to go off the deep end. Cayde realizes Uldren’s lost it, but can’t bring himself to leave his friend’s side. So he sticks with him. -Forsaken happens-gonna say Shiro is the Hunter Vanguard who gets murdered. Sorry Shiro. -Fast forward to the finale of Forsaken. With the Guardian and Petra closing in, Cayde decides to go and hold them off to buy time for Uldren  -It’s brave, but all for naught: Cayde lasts all of what, five seconds before getting killed, while Uldren is eaten by a Wish Dragon, spat out, and shot dead -See though, the Cayde we’ve been following here wasn’t Cayde-6. It was Cayde-5. -Cayde’s grave ends up being found by Sundance. So...yeah. Cayde-6 is reborn That’s what I got so far. Kind of scatter brained, but lemme know what ya’ll think of this!

[straylightdream]

part two: the rose garden

featuring: Mob Boss Kim Junmyeon x reader, Bodyguard Oh Sehun x reader

Cold, wicked and ruthless we’re all words that people used to describe Junmyeon, but when it came to her he made an oath to protect her. Sehun was assigned to watch over her, he never expected for her to break down his walls.

warnings: angst, mentions of violence, injuries, death, blood, ptsd, future chapters will contain sexual conteny.

word count: 9.8k another long one

AN: I would like to know which of the two guys you’re rooting for.

previous > next

series masterlist

Two weeks have passed since you hurt yourself. In those two weeks Sehun has been glued to you following you around the compound. He follows you everywhere you go, never letting you out of his line of sight. The only time he leaves you alone is when you sleep or either of you need to shower. Things have felt different since that night. There seems to be a tension whenever Sehun is around. Your stomach twists in knots thinking about how your carelessness ruined everything. The short period of time when Sehun leaves you alone so he can either attend a meeting or to shower he always leaves you under the watchful eye of Kyungsoo. He’s by far the most relaxed of the group. He has no issue sitting in the library reading a book with you. Or sitting in the TV room watching a rerun of an old show. Out of all the men Kyungsoo feels the most normal. From what you have heard some of the men say when they need someone to get info out of someone they send Kyungsoo in. You aren’t sure if that means he’s ruthless or maybe that calm and collected enough to get the info out of them. You can’t help but wonder if any of these men date. You’ve barely ever seen any of them leave the compound if they aren’t with Junmyeon.

Sitting in the library under the window on the overly expensive couch your eyes scroll the pages in front of you. Kyungsoo is sitting next to you flipping through a vintage book he’s told you is his favorite. Glancing out the window you watch as trees move in the distance. You’ve grown to forget what it’s like to feel the breeze in your hair. Closing the book you turn on the couch staring out the window. You wonder what it would feel like to go outside and feel the spring breeze.

“If you want to go out there I’ll take you or if you feel more comfortable Sehun or one of the other guys can take you,” he closes his book and looks out the windows next to you.

“I haven’t been outside since that night,” you sigh, pushing away the vivid images of that night that are trying to play in your brain.

Someone clears their throat and you look over to see Sehun standing in the doorway. His hair is still wet from his shower he’s just taken. He nods his head at Kyungsoo. Automatically Kyungsoo stands up and nods, sees that as his signal to leave. Sehun walks over and stands by the couch watching you. You glance up at him and give him a smile.

“Would you like to sit,” you pat the couch next to you. He hesitates for a moment before sitting down next to you. You look out the window with childlike wonder. Even though the outside world terrifies you, part of you wants to go out there.

“Are you stuck here because of me?” you say with your eyes still locked on the outside world.

“No. I’m able to leave. There are seven other men fully capable of watching over you if I need to leave for something. I chose to stay and watch after you.”

“I don’t mean to be a burden to you,” a sigh passes your lips.

He reaches over and lightly rests his hand on your knee. A warmth washes over you at his simple touch. He hasn’t touched you like this in two weeks. Since you fell he’s been treating you like you’re made of glass. Too afraid to touch you.

“Please stop saying you’re a burden. You aren’t by any means.”

Glancing over at him he has a tender expression on his face. There is something about the way he’s staring at you that it takes everything in your not to reach out and touch his soft face.

“I want to go outside,” you admit even though you’re still terrified.

“Okay. When do you want to go outside?” He asks with his hand still resting on your thigh.

“Can we go now? I just want to see the garden,” you turn so you’re fully facing him.

He nods.

Leaving the library you go to your room to grab shoes that aren’t just the house slippers you normally wear. Pulling on your light jacket, you have a nervous feeling in the pit of your stomach. It feels as if you’re a child getting ready for their first day of school. Walking into the hallway you find Sehun waiting for you. Your eyes automatically go to his waistband to see he’s carrying his gun. You lead the way as you walk through the compound. Once you reach the door you find Baekhyun, Jongin, Jongdae, and Minseok waiting for you. While you were getting ready Sehun must have told them you were going outside.

You stop dead in your track as the fear washes over you. Your body tenses up as you have the sudden desire to turn around. A calming hand rests on your shoulder and you don’t even have to turn around to know it’s Sehun’s. Taking a deep breath you attempt to center yourself. You know you’re strong that you can do this. You repeat to yourself over and over nothing outside will kill you.

Leaning down Sehun whispers in your ear just loud enough for you to hear, “I’m gonna be there to protect you. You can do this.”

Closing your eyes you take a deep breath and nod your head.

His hand moves so it rests on your lower back as he guides you out the front door.

The feeling of the warm sun on your skin is a friendly hello from an old friend. You stop five feet from the door and close your eyes taking in the sunshine. It’s been too long and you know that. Sehun's hand leaves your back as you step forward.

Taking a deep breath, the fresh air fills your lungs. Looking back you find Sehun watching you intently and behind him Baekhyun's hand is on his gun and Jongin, Minseok and Jongdae are standing at full attention next to him. Your eyes go to Baekhyun's gun and you visibly swallow. Sehun steps in front of your line of vision capturing your attention.

“Nothing's gonna happen. They’re just out here for a layer of comfort.”

You nod and turn around looking at the garden that constantly catches your eye. Stepping forward you walk across the pavement. Your eyes roam around everywhere checking your surroundings. The sound of a cracking noise startles you. Stopping in your tracks you look over at the noise to see Jongin’s foot stepping on a twig. Your eyes are wide as your body is frozen in place.

Sehun moves so he’s standing in front of you. He reaches out resting his hand on your shoulder. Your eyes snap to his and your eyes roam his face rapidly. He must read the look of fear in your eyes. His other hands lift gently and rest on your cheek.

“You’re okay. Nothing out here will hurt you,” his words are low, just loud enough for you to hear.

Nodding your head lightly you close your eyes and take a deep breath. Stepping back he removes his hand from your skin.

Stepping around Sehun you slowly start walking down the path toward the garden that is in the back of the compound. With each step you take you hear the echoes of Sehun and the four men walking behind you. Stopping in front of the garden you hand reaches out to touch the blood red petals of a rose bush near you.

A cool breeze pushes your hair out of your face. Looking around you can’t help but knowledge how beautiful all the flowers are.

In a sea of madness these flowers are something beautiful. Your eyes brim with tears, you feel so overwhelmed by everything surrounding you. You feel incredibly overwhelmed as the watchful eyes of Sehun and the four men stayed locked on you. They’re watching every movement. Nothing you do goes unnoticed.

Ever so slowly Minseok and Jongdae walk further into the garden. You know that these men must think you’ve gone insane. Being outside isn’t supposed to be this overwhelming.

The whole time you stayed outside wandering around the small garden against the back wall you felt Sehun presents right behind you. He was always about a foot away from you, while the other four were no further then five feet away.

Stepping back into the compound a wave of relief washes over. The short trip outside leaves you feeling exhausted. Walking off toward the foyer you look back and see Sehun behind you. He gives you a soft smile as he slowly walks behind you.

You know all too well that if it wasn’t for Sehun you would have never been able to step outside. Your bodyguard has been your main source of moral support through all this. Even though you don’t talk nonstop, he’s always there with gentle reassuring touches and letting know he’s there for you. You need him like air in your lungs.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Yeah I’m just pretty tired,” you were mentally drained from your short trip.

“Did you want to take a nap?”

It was the middle of the afternoon and you probably shouldn’t take a nap, but you were so tired you thought it might be a good idea.

“Yeah that sounds like a good idea.”

Walking up the stairs towards your room Sehun stops at your room and holds the dark door open as you enter your room. He stops in the doorway and watches as you walk over towards your bed. Sitting on the mint comforter you suddenly feel safe in the comfort of your room. Sehun watches you carefully as he walks towards you. A heavy sigh passes your lips as you push your fingers through your messy hair. Your eyes brim with tears and you aren’t exactly sure why. It might have to do with the overwhelming feeling of the safety of your bedroom. Resting your face in your palms you start to cry. The tears keep coming and you can’t stop them. The feeling of Sehun pulling you into his chest is a friendly reminder you aren’t alone. The feeling of your chest tightening causes you to fight to breathe as sob into his shirt. He rubs your back and whispers over and over, “you’re okay.”

You want desperately to believe him but you can’t. The world feels like it’s spinning as you soak his shirt with your tears.

“You’re safe,” his voice is so calming as he speaks to you.

You open your mouth to speak and nothing comes out. You sob into his chest for too long, he never releases his hold on you. The sweet words continue to fall from his lips.

The tears finally stop and you’re exhausted. Pulling away you look at him to see the sad look in his eyes. He reaches up and ever so gently brushes away the tears from your cheek.

“Thank you,” your voice is hoarse from crying.

“I’m always here for you,” his hand lingers on your cheek and your heartbeat picks up.  

“Sehun I can’t do this without you.”

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m always going to be here. You’re never alone, you have me and the rest of the group and Junmyeon.”

Leaning forward you rest your head against his chest and take a deep breath trying to calm down.  

Pulling back away from him you stare at him for a long moment before rubbing your face, “I think I should sleep.”

He pushes your hair behind your ear and nods softly. He doesn’t say anything as he stares into your sad eyes for a long moment.

“I’ll be close by. If you need me I’ll be here.”

Laying down you curl up into a ball and stare at the wall for a long moment. Sehun stays sitting on your bed. Looking at him your eyes stay locked on him until your eyes grow too heavy to stay open.

Sleeping had never been easy for you, even before losing your brother. Most of your nights now were filled with nightmares. In your hazy state you saw visions of your brother alive and well. Sitting by the garden at your family home you grew up in. The sun was bright and warm against your skin as you laid in the tall grass. Your brother is sitting next to you playing with a daisy found. Slowly picking off each petal tossing them in into the summer breeze.

The sound of your mother's sweeting voice is humming in the background and you look over at your brother. Your mother’s voice grows closer and you look up to see her standing over you holding her homemade lemonade. Everything feels so right and so perfect. Sung-Ho stands up holding his hand out for you. Standing up the warm breeze pushes your hair out of your face. You turn to walk towards your mother and Sung-Ho then suddenly everything goes dark

Your body is gently being shaken when your eyes open to see Sehun gently shaking you awake.

“What’s going on?” A heavy yawn passes your lips.

“You’ve been asleep for three hours and I think you should probably eat something,” he pauses like he’s trying to figure out what he should say next. “Also Junmyeon wants to check on you.”

Tilting your head you’re surprised to hear that he wants to check on you, “okay.”

“He’s standing outside. He didn’t want to startle you.”

“Okay he can come in.”

He nods before he stands up and walks towards your bedroom door. Opening it he signals for Junmyeon to walk in. Sehun gives you a small smile before he shuts the door.

The room is completely silent as Junmyeon stands there watching you for a long moment. You can’t help but feel like you must look crazy or something the way his watchful eyes are monitoring you.

“I heard you went outside,”Junmyeon says, finally speaking as he steps closer to your bed.

You nod. You’re still shocked that he came by your bedroom to talk to you.

“Minseok said you seemed very overwhelmed,” he stops at the foot of your bed looking down at you with soft eyes.

“It’s a lot to take in. The outside world still scares me,” a heavy sigh passes your lips. “Did Sehun tell you about my breakdown?”

He silently nods standing by your bed.

“May I sit down?” His eyes are focused on your mint colored comforter.

Silently you nod.

“Are you afraid of the outside world or are you afraid of the people who hurt your brother?” His voice sounds even, but his facial expression looks like he’s trying to restrain himself.

“I'm nothing more than a loose end.”

Reaching out he softly rests his hand on your knee. He shakes his head and says, “they aren’t going to come for you. The Choi’s know that I won’t hesitate to end their whole gang.” Those two sentences are a strong reminder of the power Junmyeon holds. People and other gangs fear him. He’s ruthless when he wants to be and he rules with an iron fist.

“The Choi’s made a mistake when they took out your brother. They know what the consequence is if they touch someone else in my inner circle,” he looks angry.

Your stomach twists as you watch him speak to you. You know his anger is in no way directed at you but seeing him like this lets you know that he can be scary when he wants to be.

“I’m not a part of your inner circle,” you look down at your leg where his hand still rests.

“You are considered a part of my inner circle now. People now know that you are not to be touched,” his words soften as he stares at you. He must have realized that seeing him mad scared you. His thumb tenderly brushes your leg, “I’m sorry if I scared you. I don’t like you seeing this side of me.”

Reaching your hand out you mindlessly rest your hand on top of his. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for a moment. You can’t help but stare at him, he’s so beautiful.

“I want to keep you away from all this mob stuff. I don’t want you to worry about it,” his tone has softened significantly.

“Okay,” you slowly lift his hand and flip it over so his palm is resting up on your leg.

You feel his watchful eyes on you as you stare at his calloused palm. You glance up at him and he gives you a timid smile. You’ve been at the compound for almost three months now and you realize that you’ve seen another person enter the compound other than Junmyeon or the inner circle. You can’t help but let your mind wonder if Junmyeon had a girl outside he saw. If he had someone who loves him. You hesitate before reaching forward and dragging your fingers across his calloused palm. He doesn’t say anything he just silently watches you touch his skin. You’ve never been this physically close to him, and you wish you had long before this moment.

“You’re a very kind man Junmyeon when it comes to me,” you don’t look up at him. Your eyes remain locked on his hand.

“I’m not a good person,” his voice is filled with guilt.

Looking up you see his small smile has fallen. The corners of his mouth are tugged down. “People say I’m ruthless.”

Raising your eyebrow you whisper, “you aren’t with me or the guys.”

“This is my family. All the men in this house are my brothers.”

“Am I your family?” you aren’t sure why you ask him this.

He nods, “yes you are. Your brother was my family, and that night four years ago when I handed you that card, you also became my family.”

You swallow and think back to that night you woke up to a banging on your apartment door. If you would have known what your life was going to become you might have begged your brother to walk away from EXO.

“Your brother cared about nothing in this world more than he cared for you. He was the one pulled me aside and asked for me to take care of you if something happened to him. He was the one who asked me to give you that number,” his voice is soft as he lays everything out for you.

Placing your hand flat on top of his you stare at him blinking back tears.

“I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Shaking your head you lie, “I’m fine.” The tear that slides down your cheek lets Junmyeon know that isn’t true.

Reach out his thumb and he brushes the tear away as it slides down your warm cheek.

“I think I should leave before I make you feel anymore uncomfortable.”

Before he can even move you hold onto his hand desperately. You don’t want him walking away thinking he hurt you. Shaking your head you say, “I’m okay.”

“Promise me if you’re not okay you’ll tell me?” His eyes are so soft as he looks at you.

“I promise.”

“Would you like to go to the garden with me tomorrow?”

You nod your head and smile.

“Okay tomorrow morning let’s go outside together.”

You release his hand and he stands up. He brushes off his pants before giving you another soft smile. “I have a business I have to take care of at the office. I won’t be home for dinner, but Sehun, Kyungsoo, Jongin and Jongdae will be eating with you.”

“Okay.”

You watch him open your bedroom and walk away. He leaves the door open and a moment later Sehun walks in.

“Are you okay?” Sehun asks, walking towards your bed. He must notice that your eyes are glossy after your conversation with his boss.

You nod and slowly crawl off your bed, “we talked about my brother, and I always cry talking about him.”

“Junmyeon said that you’ll be having dinner with us tonight,” says as he looks down at his boots.

-

Sitting at the long mahogany dining table. Kyungsoo cooked everyone a delicious dinner and the boys were happily eating. Your appetite most days felt nonexistent, your body seemed to only want to eat enough to get by. You kept telling yourself over and over this is your way of dealing with guilt. Taking a deep breath you try to gather your thoughts as you attempt to eat more. Bringing a bite up to your mouth you feel a pair of dark eyes on you. Setting your chopsticks down, you glance up to find Sehun staring at you. His eyes bore into you as he studies you. Even before Junmyeon assigned Sehun to be your bodyguard you knew he was constantly watching you. You’ve always seemed to hold his attention, but then again you’ve always been interested in the youngest member of the inner circle.

“Are you full?” He knows there’s no way you’re full, but he still asks you.

Shrugging your shoulder you look back down at the bowl in front of you. How are you supposed to tell him that food isn’t appealing to you.

“Can you please try to eat more?”  his voice is so soft as he speaks to you. He rests his warm hand on your arm and gently brushes his thumb against your skin.

Nodding you reach down picking your chopsticks again. You pick up a bite of kimchi bringing it to your lips. Glancing over at Sehun you see his lips have pulled up into a small smile.

There’s something about being around Sehun that he comforts you, but also makes you feel like you’re not completely alone while being surrounded by the chaos that is this compound. His soft smile and gentle voice makes you forget that Jongin, Kyungsoo, and Jongdae are sitting at the table having a loud conversation about something completely random.

“Thank you.”

You hope one day you won’t feel like such a burden to Sehun and the rest the men. You hope one day Sehun will be able to have a real life away from being your babysitter.

-

Standing in front of the sink you’re cleaning your yellow coffee cup that was just filled with tea. Sehun is leaning against the island checking something on his phone.

“Would you like to watch a movie or some tv with me?” Junmyeon asks while walking into the kitchen catching you off guard. He was home earlier than you expected him.

Knitting your eyebrows together you’re surprised to hear him asking to do such a mundane thing together. You guys have started talking way more recently and you’ve made plans to go outside in the morning, but he’s never really asked to spend time with you.

“I would really enjoy that.”

“Did you want to get changed into your pajamas to get comfortable while I eat a quick dinner?”

“Yeah I’ll do that now.”

Walking out of the kitchen Sehun follows you. You can’t help but wonder if he’ll ever grow bored of following you around. It wasn’t like you were entertaining by any means. He probably felt awkward sitting in the library being forced to watch you read.

He stays in the hallway while you go into your room to change into something more comfortable. You decide since Junmyeon still had to eat dinner you would wash your face and brush your teeth before leaving your room.

Walking back into the kitchen you find Junmyeon leaning against the island eating instant ramen. You can’t help but find it slightly funny that this extremely rich and powerful man was eating instant ramen dressed in a suit.

He must notice the smile spread across your face because he raises an eyebrow and shakes his head at you.

“Give me a few more minutes and I’ll join you in the TV room,” he says before taking a huge bite of his ramen.

Walking over to the fridge you pull out a bottle of water before walking into the TV room. Entering the larger room has two plush sofas and large TV, you find Jongdae and Yixing watching some romantic drama. They both seem very wrapped up in whatever they’re watching. They both look at you for a short moment before looking back at the TV. It’s interesting to see men who carry guns around for a living watching a romantic movie.

Sehun stays put as you join them on the extremely comfy sofa.

Sehun's watchful eyes stayed locked on you as you stared at the TV. You can’t help but wonder if Jongdae and Yixing know that Junmyeon asked you to watch a movie. Maybe he had asked them to join as well.

The movie plays for about twenty more minutes when Junmyeon walks into the TV room wearing a pair of lounge pants and a grey shirt. He gives Yixing and Jongdae a single look before they silently leave the room. He looks over at Sehun who hasn’t moved from his position and says, “you don’t have to watch her tonight, I’ve got her. If she needs anything I’ll have Chanyeol get you.”

Sehun stares at his boss with an emotionless look on his face. His lips are pursed together as he silently nods his head before walking out of the room. Junmyeon looks at you and gives you a soft smile, “are you okay if it’s just us?”

You didn’t understand why he thought you wouldn’t be okay with it just being you and him. He sits down on the sofa next to you leaving a little space between you.

He scrolls through Netflix before deciding on a romantic comedy to watch. You can barely seem to focus on the movie as it plays. You only seem to be able to pay attention to Junmyeon. You can’t help but notice how relaxed he seems. It’s the first time in a while he doesn’t look like the weight of the world seems to be on his shoulders. Just being next to him in his relaxed state helps put you at ease.

The movie continues to play and you aren’t even sure you can remember the plot. Towards the end of the movie your eyes have grown too heavy and you’ve fallen asleep with your head resting on the arm rest.

The feeling of your body being moved wakes you up. Your eyes slowly drift open and you find Junmyeon staring down at you. He holds you in bridal style as he carries you towards the stairs.

“I could have walked,” you murmured, still barely awake in a dazed state.

“It’s okay I got you.” He sounds so calm as he speaks to you.

Closing your eyes you rest your head against his chest. This whole thing feels like a dream. You hear the sound of your door opening but Junmyeon’s hands don’t leave your body. Slowly opening your eyes you see Sehun at your door.

“I got her. You can go to bed,” Junmyeon says softly.

Your body is gently laid on your soft bed and you look up to see Junmyeon standing above you. Reaches out he tenderly pushes a piece of hair away from your face. His warm eyes are as soft as they stare at you. He still seems very relaxed almost as if this is a normal situation for him to be in.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep,” you say before letting out another yawn.

“It’s okay, we can watch a movie another night together.”

He doesn’t move as he stares at you silently. He is still standing above you watching you carefully. You want to say something to him but you are sure what to say. You’re so tired you can barely hold your eyes open as you blink trying your hardest to stay awake for a few more moments.

“Goodnight Junmyeon.”

“Goodnight YN.”

-

Pulling your coat against your body you take a deep breath staring at the door. You know Sehun is standing on the other side waiting for you. Just like he’s always there waiting for you. You’re attempting to gather yourself before stepping out. You hate that just going outside feels like such a big deal to you. This shouldn’t have to be such an ordeal. You shouldn’t need at least four men to feel safe. You shouldn’t need Sehun to be within five feet of you to make you feel safe.

Opening the door Sehun is standing there waiting for you. He’s dressed in a sweater and jeans with a pair of boots. He’s wearing a holster with his gun in it. He gives you a soft smile as you stand completely still in the doorway.

“Ready?” He tilts his head slightly to the side.

Nodding you follow him down the hall towards the stairs. You take each step slowly telling yourself in your head that this is going to be okay. That this is a step in the right direction of fixing the things that make you feel broken.

Walking into the dining room you find Junmyeon waiting for you. It’s surprising to see him dressed in a pair of jeans and sweater as well. He looks so casual and you can’t help but smile. Normally by breakfast time he’s already dressed in his suit getting ready to go to the office.

“Good morning,” he says, giving you a soft smile.

“Morning.”

Looking around the dining room you find the seven other men standing around waiting. Chanyeol is right behind Junmyeon towering over him. Baekhyun is leaning against the arc that leads to the foyer.

“You ready?” Junmyeon asks, stepping towards you.

You turn on your heels to walk out of the dining room but before you can move you’re frozen in place for a moment. A sense of fear washing over you.

“Junmyeon can I ask you something before we go outside?” You turn to face him. Your stomach twitches slightly. You aren’t exactly why you get nervous talking to him.

“Yes.”

“Do you have your gun?” Your voice is low and slightly shaking. You have a nervous feeling in the pit of your stomach.

Reach behind him into his waistband he pulls out his gun. He flashes it to you before putting it back. You feel a sense of relief wash over you. He must notice something is up because he steps forward and gently rests his hand on your shoulder, “I’m gonna protect you. Nothing will happen to you. Sehun will be with us along with Chanyeol, and the rest the circle will be outside.”

Looking around the dining room you find all of the men who are closest to Junmyeon standing around. You keep telling yourself that it would literally take an army to get through Junmyeon and all his men. You’ll never be safer than when you’re surrounded by all the men in this room.

“Okay let’s go.”

Junmyeon leads the way walking through the foyer walking towards the front door. He stops in front of the dark door and turns to glance at you. You’re standing behind him taking deep breaths trying to calm yourself down. Opening the door slowly the warm sun peaks into the mansion. A hand rests on your lower back and you don’t have to look to the side to know that it’s Sehun letting you know you’re gonna be okay. He guides you as you slowly follow Junmyeon outside. You need his guidance at this moment. You need to know that he’s by your side and he’s not going anywhere. You never feel safer than the way Sehun is touching you.

The boys must have told Junmyeon about your fascination with the rose garden because it’s the first place he goes. You closely follow right behind him, making sure you don’t fall too far behind.

He stops in the middle of the garden and turns to face you. He gives you a soft smile as you stop in front of him. He turns and walks towards a rose bush. His hand gently runs across the petals before he stops and stares at the flower.

You’re literally surrounded by nine men all carrying loaded guns and you still don’t feel safe. It doesn’t make sense to you and you can’t go on living like this. You hate the feeling of fear overtaking you. You know deep down inside you need help. If you’re ever going to get better you need someone to help you, someone other than the nine men you live with.

“Junmyeon?”

His hands are in his pockets as he walks and stands in front of you. “Yes?” He looks so stoic as he looks at you.

“I think I need to talk to someone,” you want to fully get over this fear you have of the outside world. You can’t go on living in fear.

“Okay. I told you I would get you someone to talk to. You can either go to someone or I can bring someone here,” he says.

“Can you have someone come here?” you know this is a much needed step you need to take. The outside world is never going to stop scaring you.

“Of course. I’ll find someone today and I’ll have them here by this week.”

“Thank you.”

A soft smile tugs at his lips as he steps closer to you, “I told you I would do anything to protect you and to look after you.”

You walk side by side with Junmyeon as he leads you through the beautiful garden. He tells you about when he bought this place there wasn’t any landscaping.

“There wasn’t a single flower, and I didn’t like it,” he says stopping in front of a rose bush. “I want this to feel like a home, and a home should have flowers.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a pocket knife. He flips it open and moves to cut a stem of the roses. He holds it gently as he cuts away the thorns before holding it out towards you. Without even a second thought he removed the thorns that could hurt you. Taking it in your hand you stared at the beautiful rose.

“It’s beautiful,'' you say softly.

He opens his mouth to say something but looks away instead. With the rose in your hand you follow him throughout the garden. There’s a warm breeze pushing your hair away from your face as you watch Junmyeon casually walking through the garden. Seeing him like this almost makes you forget about what his job is. He seems so normal walking through the garden.

Your trip is cut short when Junmyeon has to take a phone call. He apologizes as you walk back into the compound together.

-

The following day you’re slow to get up. You woke feeling extra tired. Maybe it has something two do with the two nightmares that kept you up. Sitting on your bed a yawn passes your lips as someone knocks on the door. You tell them to come in assuming it’s Sehun.

“I have to go take care of some family stuff today. Jongdae and Kyungsoo are gonna watch after you,” Sehun says walking towards your bed.

A weird feeling washes over you knowing that Sehun will be leaving your side for the first time.

“Okay,” you aren’t even sure what exactly else you can say.

“If you need me I’ll be back quickly, but you’re safe with those two and the rest of the men will be near.”

“I’ll be okay,” you aren’t sure if you’re saying it more for him or more for yourself.

You go about your morning taking a shower and getting dressed before heading downstairs to get some breakfast. You find Junmyeon sitting at the table with a cup of coffee in front of him and an omelette.

“Morning,” he says looking up from paperwork he was studying.

“Good morning.”

“Kyungsoo bring her some breakfast please,” Junmyeon says.

Before you can even say anything Kyungsoo leaves the dining area heading off to the kitchen. He comes back quickly with an omelette and your yellow coffee cup that’s filled with coffee. He takes a seat in Sehun’s normal seat and it feels like something is missing with Sehun gone.

“I found a therapist who can come by today to speak with you. Kyungsoo will go pick her up and you’ll stay with Jongdae while he’s gone,” your eyes go wide. You didn’t expect him literally to find you someone to talk to with in twenty-four hours. You just nod your head as he continues on, “I have to go to the office today but I won’t be gone too long. I’m only taking Minseok, Chanyeol, and Jongin with me.”

You realize right away that he’s leaving Baekhyun and Yixing with you. Baekhyun is someone who always travels with Junmyeon. It’s an extremely well known fact that him and Sehun are the best shots in the group. It leaves you feeling safe but also strange that he’s left the best shot and the medic with you.

It’s not long before Junmyeon leaves with Chanyeol and Minseok.

After eating breakfast you sit in the library on the same leather couch reading a book. Around noon Kyungsoo leaves to go pick up the person Junmyeon scheduled to come talk to you. Jongdae replaces him sitting in the chair by the door. Jongdae makes small talk with you for a little while before he starts scrolling through his phone. You can’t help but miss Sehun as you sit there. Even if he didn’t say much to you, you find his company comforting.

“What did Sehun have to do today?” You asked, breaking the silence that’s formed between you and Jongdae.

Closing his phone he looks up at you, “he went to see his mother. He doesn’t see her very often and asked him to come see her today.”

There is a guilty feeling in your chest. Were you the reason he hasn’t seen your mother in a long time.

Soon Kyungsoo walks into the library catching both yours and Jongdae’s attention.

“YN are you ready?” Kyungsoo asks.

You nod and stand up. Jongdae takes this as his cue and heads out of the library.

Kyungsoo walks closer to you so he’s standing right in front of you. “YN you can openly speak to her. She’s not going to tell anyone about what you say. Don’t worry about keeping secrets. Junmyeon says that you can say anything to help you get better,” Kyungsoo says.

“I won’t say anything about what Junmyeon does,” you’ve told yourself that you won’t specifically bring up EXO gang. You just want to talk about your brother.

“Miss come in,” Kyungsoo says, walking towards the door.

A beautiful woman dressed in a turtleneck and tight slacks walks in. He black high heels click against the hardwood floor as she walks closer. Kyungsoo bows his head to her before walking out of the room. She sits down in the chair Jongdae has been sitting in. There’s a long moment where you just stare at her completely unsure of what you should do. This whole situation is very foreign to you.

Sitting on the leather couch you stare at the beautiful women. You can’t help but find it strange she’s the first woman you’ve seen in months.

“YN, would you like to talk about your fear of the outside world?” she says crossing her legs.

You blink at her silently and tilting your head trying to figure out where to even begin. Opening your mouth to speak nothing comes out. You’ve only ever really told Sehun and Junmyeon about the nightmares that haunt. Chanyeol woke you up a few times in the beginning, but none of them knew the full details of what haunts you. Five minutes have passed and you still can’t bring yourself to speak or figure what to say.

“YN I’m here to listen. I’m here to help you get better.” You know she’s right in order for you to get better you need to talk about this.

You’ve barely opened up to anyone. You weren’t sure how you were exactly supposed to trust this pretty woman sitting across from you.

“YN?” Her calming voice catches your attention. “I’m here to listen and help you.”

“It all started when Sung-Ho was killed in front of me,” you sigh. Like an avalanche you spew out the trauma of that night. You relive the details of Sung-Ho being killed in front of you. With each word you say tears fall down your cheek. Your chest hurts from sobbing as you tell her about the nightmares that keep you awake at night. Then you start talking about Sehun and the tears stop.

“He’s the only thing keeping me from feeling like I’m falling apart,” reaching up to push away the tears.

“You’ve grown extremely codependent on Sehun. It’s normal after a tragedy to latch on to someone,” she doesn’t sound like she’s judging you as she speaks in an even tone. “It’s natural to cling to him. Especially if he’s with you every waking moment.”

“How is your relationship with the other men that live here?” You haven’t really thought about your relationship with the other boys or how they even see you.

“I’m closer to some of them and then other ones I don’t exactly speak with often. Some of them are very busy helping Junmyeon.”

She nods and gives you a moment, “tell me about the ones you’re close with.”

“Sehun is one I’m closest with and Jongdae, and  Kyungsoo are with me pretty often as well. I think Jongdae is kind, but he’s worried around me constantly. As if he’s worried he’s going to say something wrong to me. Kyungsoo by far treats me the most normal. He also feels the most normal in all this chaos. He has no issue just sitting with me while I read. Then there is Junmyeon,” you pause unsure of what you can even say about the man in charge of everything.

“What about Junmyeon?”

“He’s gone out of his way to make sure I feel safe, but he doesn’t realize that I feel safe just being around him. I’ve spent a little alone time with him and when it’s just us he seems to relax. He puts me at ease when he’s relaxed,” you wish you could explain your feeling towards Junmyeon, but you didn’t know how to put them into words.

“From the little I have spoken to him, Junmyeon seems like he cares deeply about you.”

The rest of your hour you talked to her about guilt you have over feeling like you’ve ruined Sehun's life by him having to constantly babysit you. The therapy session feels like a blur as you spill all your emotion. The beautiful woman ends the hour by telling you she would like to speak with you twice a week. She says she’ll see you again on Thursday.

You walk out of the library to find Jongdae and Kyungsoo waiting for you. Kyungsoo escorts the therapist out of the compound leaving you once again with Jongdae.

“How did it go?” Jongdae asks, breaking the silence.

“Okay.”

“Would you like some lunch? we can make something.” he seems almost unsure on how he should interact with you. He must realize that your emotions are high after what you just experienced.

“No thank you. I’m extremely tired. I'm going to take a nap.”

He nods and follows you towards your room making sure you get inside okay. He parts ways with you telling he’ll be nearby if you need him.

Laying in bed you attempt to shut your wandering mind off. Even after talking about your nightmares to the therapist this is still no easy task for you. You think about Sehun before your eyes grow too heavy to stay open.

In your hazy state this is the first time you’ve dreamt of something other than your brother. Your vision is filled with a sea of red roses. In the middle of the sea you Sehun standing there waiting for you.

The gentle feeling of your body being shaken wakes you up. Opening your eyes you find Junmyeon standing over you.

“Sorry if I scared you,” he says softly.

“No you’re fine,” a soft yawn passes your lips as you sit up.

“I’m back from the office early and I wanted to see if you wanted to have dinner with me.”

You’re surprised to see him. When he left today you didn’t actually expect to see him back in time for dinner. You fully planned on eating with Jongdae and Kyungsoo.

“Yeah I’ll have dinner with you.”

-

Sitting in the dining room Junmyeon asked you if he could sit where Sehun normally sits. He sounds nervous about asking to sit closer to you.

Kyungsoo walks in and sits dinner down in front of you and Junmyeon and you patiently wait expecting the rest of the boys to join you. You look around surprised you don’t even see Chanyeol who is always around his boss.

“Is everything okay?” Junmyeon asks, picking up his glass of water.

“Yeah. Where are the boys?”

He raises his eyebrow and tilts his head giving you a confused look. “They aren’t joining us,” he pauses. “Is it okay if it’s just us?”

You’ve never eaten dinner alone with Junmyeon. From the moment you’ve moved in every meal has been shared with at least two other men. He gives you a small smile as he watches you, waiting for you to respond.

“Yeah it’s fine. I was just curious.”

You start eating your delicious food Kyungsoo prepared. You notice that Junmyeon instantly relaxes once you start eating. The more time you spend with him the easier it seems to feel. He’s starting not to just feel like a protector any more. He feels like a friend, you’ve grown to deeply care about the man sitting next to you. He’s done nothing but go out of his way to not only make you feel safe, but also make you feel like this is your home.

There’s an awkward silence between you and you aren’t sure how you’re supposed to make small talk with the man sitting next to you. You can’t exactly ask about the weather since you barely go outside and you can’t really ask about his job being in charge of a mob. Knitting your eyebrows you stare at the dark wood table.

“Is everything okay?” Junmyeon asked, raising an eyebrow. Looking you a crook smile forms in your lips. He instantly smiles back at you. “What’s on your mind?”

“How are we supposed to make small talk?”

He shrugs his shoulders, “we don’t have to make small talk. We can talk about literally anything you want to talk about.”

Your mind races with all the possible questions you could ask the powerful man sitting next to you. You settle for asking something that will help you learn more about the man sitting next to you. “Have you ever been in love?”

His bottom lip is captured between his teeth as he stares at you processing your question. “As a teenager I was. Why do you ask?”

Shrugging your shoulder you aren’t exactly sure why you asked him. That was probably too personal of a question to ask him. “I guess I’m just curious. I’ve never really seen any women around here or heard any of the other guys mention them.”

“I haven’t exactly had time for personal relationships up until now,” there’s something about him saying now that makes your stomach flutter. “The boys have all had girlfriends at one point of another. A lot of them don’t want to worry about maintaining a relationship.” You quickly wonder what the women were like that dated the guys. You assume Kyungsoo dated a smart girl who’s quite like him, and Baekhyun and Chanyeol probably dated women with big personalities to match there’s. There's a moment that stings a little thinking about who Sehun dated. He’s a quiet but very caring person, he’s extremely handsome so you know whoever he’s dated in the past must be beautiful.

“Have you ever been in love?” he asks, breaking you away from your consuming thoughts.

“I don’t know,” you were never the type that really dated. You had always been so wrapped up in school you never really focused on trying to date. It also didn’t help that you had an older brother who was literally a part of one of the most powerful mobs in the city.

“Maybe one day you’ll know what it feels like.”

You swallow staring at him. He smiles to himself before taking another bite of his dinner. Maybe he’s right, maybe you will know what it’s like to love someone.

“I’ve cared deeply for people, but I don’t know if I’ve been in love,” you start to ramble.

“When you’re in love you have this feeling you can’t live without them. When you see them the sun seems to rise and set in their eyes,” his warm eyes are locked on you as he speaks.

“Being in love sounds amazing.”

“It is,” he smiles looking down at the table.

There is a long moment where you both sit there eating before, Junmyeon sits down his chopsticks. He takes a deep breath before saying, “pardon me for asking but how did therapy go?” He must have been dying to ask about your therapy session.

“It went really good.”

“Do you mind if I ask what you spoke about?” he seems nervous asking. Almost afraid you’ll reject him.

“We talked a lot about Sung, but don’t worry I didn’t bring up what you do or what Sung’s job was.”

He shakes his, “she knows what happens here and she knows not to tell anyone. You don’t have to hold back speaking to her.”

“Myeon, what you do for a living isn’t the reason I need to speak with her. I just need to talk about losing my brother,” your eyes start to brim, but you quickly hold back the tears that are trying to fall.

“Okay.”

“She asked about my relationship with all of you.”

He raises his eyebrow and cocks his head, “what did you say?”

“I just talked about how kind you all are to me, and how you make me feel safe.” You’ve decided against bringing up that she told you you’ve grown to be codependent on Sehun.

“My goal is to make sure you feel safe,” he reaches out resting his hand on the table next to yours.

“I greatly appreciate that. When you gave me that business card years ago,” your mind flashes back to Junmyeon sitting on the couch next to you in the middle of the night. “I know you didn’t plan on having to take care of me, and I’m sorry that I’m now a burden for you.”

“Stop,” he says catching you off guard. “You aren’t a burden. You lost your brother because of his job. It’s my duty to protect you and make sure you have a good life.”

“Am I only here because you feel guilty?” you know you shouldn’t ask him this, but you need to know.

He shakes his head, “no. Even though I vowed to look after you, you’re not only here because of that. YN I want to see you happy. I want to be one of the reasons you’re happy again,” his words make you feel like your world started spinning. You weren’t exactly sure what he meant by everything he’s telling you.

“Don’t overthink everything. Just know I want to help you in any way possible,” he rested his hand on top of yours for a short moment before removing it.

You hear Sehun's familiar voice calling your name from outside the dining room. Your eyes pop up and watch as Sehun walks into the dining room. He had an emotionless look on his face as he looked between you and his boss.

“Hi Sehun,” you say breaking the sudden silence that’s fallen over the room.

“I’m home,” he says shoving his hands in his pockets.

Junmyeon stands and pushes his chair before resting his hand on your shoulder. Looking up at you he gives you that same soft smile. There’s a fluttering feeling in your stomach as your eyes lock on his warm ones.

“Thank you for having dinner with me. I’m assuming Sehun wants to talk to you.”

“Thank you for inviting me, and also thank you for getting someone who could come here and talk to me.”

Reaching up he pushes a stray piece of hair behind your ear, “of course.”

He walks away from you and stops next to Sehun. “She’s been safe all day, you can relax,” he says with his hand on Sehun’s shoulder.

Junmyeon walks out of the room and Sehun stays in the same place staring at you for a long moment before he moves to sit where Junmyeon had just been sitting. There is a long moment where you both stare at each other almost like the other one doesn’t know exactly what to say.

“How did therapy go?” he finally breaks the silence between you.

“It went good. It was nice to hear that I haven't lost my mind. That what I’m feeling is normal,” your eyes are locked on the table.

“I knew you hadn’t lost your mind,” he reaches out resting his hand on top of yours. A warmth spreads across your skin taking in the moment between you. You desperately want to tell him that you talked about him but you couldn’t. You didn’t want to remind him you’ve grown to be codependent on him.

“How was your day?” you change the subject no longer wanting to talk about you. You have talked about yourself enough for the day.

His eyes drop down to you his hand that is still resting on top of your. He stares for a long moment as he says, “it was nice. I went to see my mom and helped her with some things. How did things go with Jongdae and Kyungsoo?”

“They went well. Kyungsoo was in charge of driving the therapist, and Jongdae sat with me in the library.”

He nods and the corners of his lips tug up into a small smile, “okay good. You felt comfortable with them right?” He clearly was worried while he was away with you.

“Yeah I felt comfortable. I also had dinner with Junmyeon which was relaxing,��� the small smile on Sehun’s lips fell as you mentioned his boss's name.

“Okay that’s good. I want you to feel safe and comfortable even when I have to leave.”

Tilting your head to the side you process the fact he’s worried about leaving you alone. You hate that he must feel trapped staying in this compound with you. Taking your other hand that Sehun is touching you reach forward and take his hand laying it palm side up resting in your hand. You slowly drag your index finger across his calloused palm. His eyes stay locked on your movement watching you. This air between you feels strange. Sehun is always touching you whether it’s simple touches such as his hand on your shoulder or the slightly more intimate touch such as his hand on your lower back as you walk, but you never really touch him. You aren’t really sure what it feels like for your fingers to linger on his skin. Your bottom lip is caught between your teeth as your skin moves against his. Glancing up at him he seems like he’s holding his breath almost afraid to move.

“I did miss you being here though,” you don’t mean to say this out loud it just slips out. You don’t want him to feel tied down to you, but you would be lying if you didn’t say you missed him being around.

“I missed you too,” the words passed his lips and your eyes snapped up to his dark ones. Your heart races and you can feel your pulse pounding in your ear. He slowly licks his bottom lip as a long beat passes between you. The air is thick and suddenly and breathing feels strange. “Did you want to go to the garden tomorrow morning?” He asks with his voice low.

Silently you nod.

“Okay. Maybe it can be us and just Jongdae?” You know he’s suggesting this so you start to grow more comfortable being outside.

“Okay.”

There’s this long moment between you. There seems to be a strange tension but it isn’t uncomfortable by any means. “I should probably take a shower,” you say awkwardly.

“Okay.”

You remove your hand from his and stand up. He stands and follows you as you walk towards the stairs towards your bedroom. His hand moves so it rests on your back as you walk upstairs. Stopping in front of your room you turn to look at Sehun who is right behind you. He smiling again, seeing him smile is something that rarely happens but it makes you happy. It makes you want to smile.

“Are you going to go to bed after your shower?” he asked.

You would much rather spend time with him, but you’re pretty tired and you should probably get some rest. “I’ll probably try to sleep.”

“Okay. If you need me for anything don’t hesitate to get me,” he reaches forward opening your bedroom door.

Stepping inside you stare at him for a long moment before saying, “goodnight Sehun.”

“Goodnight,” he smiles.

Shutting the door you lean against it and take a deep breath. You feel strange and you can’t really explain the emotions you’re feeling.

Pulling yourself off the door you walk to the bathroom. You turn the warm water on and strip away your clothing. stepping into the warm water the steam engulfs your body.  Standing under the water you mind wanders to thoughts of the two men who you’ve started to grow attached to. Mindlessly you go through the act of washing your hair and using your strawberry scented body wash. Even after washing your hair you stand under the water just staring at the wall. Your mind seems to be stuck on all the things Junmyeon had said to you, and the feeling of Sehun’s warm skin.

After showering and getting ready for bed you lay under your covers attempting to shut your mind off. Staring at your bedroom door you can’t help but wonder if Sehun is still standing out there or if he went to his room. You would like to spend more time with him tonight and actually get to speak with him. You want to ask him more questions about his day. You want to know more about his mother, the woman who raised a kind and protective man. There is a part of you that also wants to speak to Junmyeon more. You want to learn more about what it felt like to be in love. You can’t help but wonder what the girl was like that held his heart. Who was the woman who knew what it was like to be loved by Junmyeon? These are the little thoughts that won’t leave your mind as you lay in bed.

Closing your eyes you pray to dream about something other than your lost family. You pray to dream about things and life that can bring you joy, maybe even the two men who protect you and seem to occupy all your thoughts now.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* the taglist is open send a message or send an ask if you would like to be tagged*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

@questiontotheanswer @green7eababy @kriswu46 @sheepish-xing @airiguk @sehunsyn @defsoul15​

[exo-reacts-to-you]

Alluring Aura {New Euphoria}

1/ you have chosen Kyungsoo! ♥ {New Euphoria}

♡ genre: angst & smut / readerbodyguard!au / billionaire!au

♡ trigger warning: violence, swearing, mentions of physical abuse, and sexual content. 

♡ summary: Kyungsoo was known for his cold appearance & the deadly silence he held in his cunning eyes. You, the most elite bodyguard was ready to protect no matter the cost. But with him, no one knew who he was deep inside & never dared to let anyone in & you never really knew your past life up until now.

Are you willing to risk your life and emotions over this?

You heard about many things about one man in particularity named Kyungsoo. Not in detail as in other people’s eyes he was only known as a proper yet dangerous man. 

The only thing interesting that made your ears perk up was the whispers around town lately about how he allegedly murdered his whole family because “he was a greedy bastard who wanted nothing more in the world than to have the money to himself and only to himself” you quoted what the general popular of the small town thought.

You couldn’t help but chuckle when your eyes landed on the picture of Kyungsoo that was printed on the fresh newspaper in your hands, his cold stare only questioned even more about what kind of man he really was. Or perhaps maybe he is what it seems like. Maybe, maybe he is truly a cold killer that needed the thrill, the fun that got him off.

The thoughts began to swirl around your mind the more you got around it but it all soon vanished as you felt a deep vibrate against your clothed thigh, reaching in your pants pocket to answer the call from-

“Miss (Y/N) come over to my place now.” 

You knew from his tone that he wasn’t playing around and you said a quick yes before hanging up, grabbing the iced coffee that was slightly melting on your table before tipping the waitress and leaving in your sleek black car that was waiting in the clear moonlight.

-

“What were you doing out so late?” Kyungsoo mumbled as soon as you opened the door to his secretly located mansion, hearing your shoes tap on the marble floor that echoed the empty walls of his home.

“I wanted to see what the small town thought about you annnddd it’s not that great of a reputation you have there.” You hung your black trench coat on one of his hooks and make way towards the couch where he was reading one of those books he gotten off from his bookshelf, his reading glasses that slid all the way to the tip of his nose but he didn’t seem to notice as his eyes were focused on the printed words.

“It’s been two days and you’re already leaving my side? Thought you were an ‘elite’ bodyguard.” He said in his usual monotone voice, not once looking at you by the way he was very intrigued on his book instead. You scoff at his words and rolled your eyes, your attention redirected on your phone as you began to look for proof.

“Your assistant texted me saying that she was going to have other bodyguards hired just in case you didn’t like me or enjoyed my company and insisted in her own words I quote, “Kyungsoo does not need a women to protect him and has decided to look for another bodyguard so you don’t need to be by his side today.” So I went to a nice coffee shop and enjoyed my time there.”

Kyungsoo lifted his head from his book to face you, his eyes burning directly towards your own as if what you said was just one big lie.

 A few seconds passed and he saw that your eyes did not waver at once and concluded that you were saying the truth, closing his book shut so loudly that the sound was bouncing off the walls, ringing in your ears.

“I like you. So don’t leave my side until I say so.” 

He said it ever so softly but you caught on, humming a quick “mmh” before lifting your body off of the couch and leaving his presence alone to go to the kitchen. His cold eyes you saw for a quick moment briefly showed you a soft side of him that strangely enough warmed your heart. You were so used to people not going ‘soft’ on you so emotions and feelings were not in your best suit per say.

After getting the chilled water bottle that was in his refrigerator, you went back to the living room where Kyungsoo was still seated, flipping the pages ever one in a while.

“Sir, I’m going to be in the gym training for a bit. If you need anything just call me okay?” Kyungsoo lifted his hand as a way of telling you he understood and off you went down to the gym area in his mansion.

Walking down the hallways you can see one of the paintings on the wall that caught your eye, causing you to stop midway in the dark area. You could make out the drawing, a woman and a man who seemed much older holding each other in their embrace, their smiles ear to ear.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?”

“Fuck-.” You inhaled as you felt a sharp pang in your head, your knees giving you as you landed harshly on the carpet that was rolled out in the hallways.

“Who do you think you are!? Some slut that can just disobey me!?”

Your vision was so blurry, only hearing the quick heartbeat that was poking your ribcage. You tried to breathe in and out, hoping that the image in your head would go away soon.

“You won’t get away so easily now.” the person loomed over your figure while you can make out another person behind them, they slashed a semi deep cut on your throat, the fire that fueled the blood spilled as you scream in agonizing pain.

The pain was hurting so much around your neck area, placing your hand over it and trying to massage it and suddenly, the pain was gone.

Vanished completely.

It took you a few minutes to register what happened and you chuckled, pitying yourself at the fact that you just had these nightmares coming back again ever since you started to work with Kyungsoo.

It never gave you much thought though so you pushed it aside as stupidly as it sounds. You were far more worried about the man you were suppose to be protecting than the demons that had possessed inside your head and memories.

But how were you even suppose to protect the man when you didn’t even know if he was good or not? You shook your head, that wasn’t for you to decide but it the idea of Kyungsoo being something..horrible kept on rubbing you the wrong way.

On nights like these you keep on wondering. And you wish you could stop because you can’t judge him, not on the accusations, not the reputation they built on him. But you couldn’t lie when you admit that you too, the one many people consider you as the elite and brave bodyguard, turned out not being so brave when it came down to the own issues that were constantly weighing you down. That painting resembled so much like the figures you could make out in your nightmares and it scared you like hell. Why was this happening to you?

You couldn’t make out most of your past as you only remember having a family that looked far from what you looked like but it was nice, being trained by a family who knew martial arts and wanted you to become the best. And part of you was curious as to why your adopted family never really told you what happened to you when they found you helpless in the orphanage. 

“When given the order, you must obey..” You whispered to yourself as you stood up, brushing off the dust that cling on to your knees. Walking more down towards the hallway, you pray to god that you can protect this man as best as you can. Given the title to your name, you wished to give off the same impression and not to back down when a fight will arise.

“You need to be ready, and so you will.” you think to yourself.

-

2 months later.

-

“You got a message!”

You groaned as you felt the phone vibrate in your hand, remembering that you were watching a show on your phone last night before falling into a deep sleep. You pressed the home button to see the message unfold before you.

From: Kyungsoo / 2:00 pm: I need you to come with me to get more suits for an event this evening.

You groaned as you saw the time but made it out of bed with every bit of strength you had, your eyes spotting out the display of clothes on top of the white silk bed sheets. It was a plain simple white blouse paired with a black pencil skirt along with some sleek black heels.

“Cute.” You mumbled to yourself, also noticing the small pocket knife that was hiding between the clothes and it made you even more happy. You didn’t really need it since you were mastered the art of martial arts and were highly obliged to fight on one on one but the thought that Kyungsoo had given you extra protection unconscionably pasted a small smile on your face. 

As you swiftly put on the clothes with a cute purse to go along with it and carefully wrapping the pocket knife in a ribbon on your black stockings that your wore underneath the small pencil skirt, you open the door to see Kyungsoo’s stone cold face directly near you and you jumped back like a cat that got bat shit scared.

“F- I mean S-Sir! I just finished getting dress-”

“Good. We can’t be late Miss (Y/N).” He abruptly cut you off. You noticed his eyes trailing off to the clothes he gave you and you smirked, twirling around to display the tight fabric on your body.

“Do I look good?”

“You look like my secretary, which is good.” He said too quickly, hiding his face. You secretly let out a smile before he saw it, seeing his ears slightly going red the more you looked at him.

So fucking cute.

He coughed into his hand, turning his back on to yours.

“We need you to not look like my bodyguard if you get what I mean.” You nodded, understanding his words. Personally, it was really fun to dress up all feminine and for your opponent to think “wow she looks so feminine so can’t possibly be a fighter” and then 10 seconds later whooped their ass was the fun of it all in your job.

“Come, we need to get there quick. The people are at this event are important. The company I’ve started are for those in need of shelters and areas that need more schools to be built and we can’t be late for it.” You nodded as you were walking side by side with Kyungsoo, briefly catching a glimpse of his face that basked in the sunlight, also catching his assistant on the far side in your view making a disgusted face at you to which you scoff at her actions in your mind.

-

As the hours passed by, you both lost track of the time due to Kyungsoo having a hard time picking the colours before you just told him he’ll look good in any colour and with that thought on his mind he chose to buy all grey suit with a black tie. 

It was getting dark soon, your mind was more alert with the surrounding around you and Kyungsoo, watching closely to the people that walked passed by. Something was bothering you, telling you something wasn’t right and you knew to trust your gut feeling so you were on the lookout.

As you both turned down into the ally way where you were almost near where the car was parked, you suddenly heard soft footsteps approaching behind you, abruptly grabbing Kyungsoo’s arm into a halt.

“I heard something.” Kyungsoo nodded and stayed still, his eyes wandering around in the dark ally but his vision wasn’t nearly as good even with his glasses on him.

 It was so silent that you could hear his and your own breathing, till you saw the figure approaching out of the shadows where you could clearly see them in the pale moonlight.

“I believe we have unfinished business together, Do Kyungsoo.”

The voice was deep, clear and crisp but you once did not waver, turning around to see if anyone else was with this man but clearly it was only the figure that was a lone wolf.

“There was no business to begin with.” Kyungsoo said sternly, he also wasn’t gonna back down so easily as he was walked in front of you, his hand clasping onto yours.

“Sir, I can protect you please.” You leaned in and whispered into his ear but he pretended that he didn’t hear you, not turning around to face you and instead tried to walk closer to the mysterious man but you kept him from moving. You weren’t going to let Kyungsoo risk his life, you had a purpose and that was to protect him with your life on the line.

The man clocked his head to the side with his slightly dark curly hair in the way, his eyes burning holes directly into yours and chuckled darkly. His hand was now reaching slowly for his back pocket as you concentrated on the details of how this was all gonna go down.

“Is this your new pet? What happened to your old one? Died out too soon?”

Kyungsoo frowned and didn’t say a word, leaving up to his icy cold eyes expresses his angry behind it instead. You knew this man was trying to get Kyungsoo more worked up but since you been working with Kyungsoo for 2 months now, you can tell his shell was more dense to break through to get to him.

The man noticing his silence, he walked a few more steps and with that your body moved itself like in slow motion. You moved Kyungsoo out of the way before the man could lift his gun to line his shot properly and you quickly grabbed his arm, twisting it as he yelped in pain giving you an opportunity to use your other hand to grab the gun out of his hand.

As the man fell onto his knees while yelling in agonizing pain you quickly aim at him with his gun while your back was facing Kyungsoo, his sudden laugh cutting off the tension.

“Oh I see how is it. After a couple of my friends choose to kill your pet and almost tried to get you, you thought your new one could protect you?” A smile pranced around on his lips as he slowly stood up, his other hand grasping of his twisted broken arm.

“Just remember the deal, Kyungsoo.” He winked and turned around, his now heavy footsteps left the scene and now it was just you and Kyungsoo alone again in the ally way. You turned around to see Kyungsoo looking at you directly now, his silent aura was starting to kill you. So many questions were popping up in your mind and you couldn’t even say anything as you decided it was the best to keep your mouth shut so you wouldn’t embarrass yourself.

“Come.” Was all he said as he reached for the gun that you grabbed so hard that your knuckles turned white, seeing the colour flushed back to normal as he gently yet firmly interlocks your hand with his and made it back into his car.

You noticed how his eyebrows were furrowed, his mouth formed into a line and his face was just, firm. You knew that look but you couldn’t exactly pinpoint what the real reason behind it all. The man had intentions, clearly they weren’t good at all.

“Just remember the deal.”

You turned your attention to the destination, realizing that you were already in the car and he was driving back to his place quickly. His eyes solely focusing on the road as you looked out to the car window, it was almost nighttime but you hope that incident didn’t make you guys late for the event at all.

“It’s almost 8.” Kyungsoo’s voice cut the tension that was floating around, his eyes drifted onto your figure before looking back at the road. You let out a soft “mhm” and sighed, all these emotions and questions were too much for you but you concealed it for the sake of the job and to also be completely profession.

“Is this your new pet?”

His snarky voice kept on appearing, shaking your head. Was there someone else protecting Kyungsoo? What happened to them? You sighed again and this time Kyungsoo noticed, raising his eyebrow a bit.

“Are you okay Miss (Y/N)?” You gave him a tiny smile along with a nod.

“Just tired but I’ll be fine for the event tonight.” You reassured him and he nodded, finally arriving at his huge mansion. As he parked his car you saw his assistant almost nearly fall while trying to run towards him, breathing heavily as she numerously tapped on the glass window of his car. He turned the windows down and waited for her to catch her breath.

“W-What took you guys so-..long? The event is almost about to start!” She asked, wiped the sweat off her forehead with the cuffs of her white shirt as she catching her breath. You heard Kyungsoo chuckle and opened the door on his right, his assistant moving out of the way so he can get out of his car fully.

“Miss (Y/N) and I have encountered someone along the way but that’s been taking care of.” He said, his hand motioning for me to get out the car and so I did, with him opening the door for me as I got out only to be met by his assistant’s annoyed look pasted on her sweaty face behind him.

“God I told you Kyungsoo to just fired her already! She’s making you lat-”

“You’re making me late by blabbing nonsense. Now, can you please get Miss (Y/N) dress ready for the event?” You smirked as you saw her smug face turned sour as his voice got more demanding and strict. She nodded quickly and ran out with her heels clicking together.

As her clicking heels sound was gone, he turned around and god was it hard to keep your composure when he looked at you. It was hard enough that your client was so fucking beautiful but it’s another thing when you saw his hand reaching out towards yours as if he was learning for your touch. You motioned your petite hands towards his, his hand grabbing yours with a mysterious glint that simmering in his warm chocolate eyes.

“Kyungsoo-”

“Don’t believe in what he said.” Was all that Kyungsoo said before he pulled away his hand away, the touch that ignited the spark in your heart faded too fast for your liking that you grabbed onto Kyungsoo’s arm and turned him around, his whole figure that towering around you. 

His cologne was a mixture notes of wood, lavender with a hint of spice. It consumed your nostrils the more he got closer, hoping he couldn’t hear your rapid heartbeat banging on your rib cage. You lost your train of thought as you both continue to stare at each other, realizing that your phone was now vibrating with new messages that snapped you out of your trance.

“I-..call me (Y/N) please. Miss is too formal.” 

Fuck! That’s definitely NOT what you wanted to say god damnit.

He stared at you for a few moments before nodding and letting of your hand that grasp on his arm so tightly, his back was all you can see as it kept on reminding you that he was not like the other clients you had before. But that’s what you kinda like about Kyungsoo. The mystery behind it even though the curiosity of finding it out kills you. 

You grabbed the phone out of your purse and saw the angry messages from his assistant and mentally wanted to face palm the shit out of your face. Not because of the messages but because your poorly chosen words you picked out of hesitating and now he probably thinks your a weirdo for stopping him like that.

“Great job (Y/N)..” You grumbled and made your way to the door, swinging the door open to see her face, that smug face that shouldn’t even be there to begin with but you managed to break a smile before pushing your way through the door, hearing her scoff at you.

-

The event was doing fairly fine as the people in their fancy suits and dresses were mingling with each other. The pleasant sound of soulful jazz danced around in the beautifully lit room, the chandeliers shining bright like a rare diamond in the starry night sky that touch your heart. A feeling that brought a small smile on your face and Kyungsoo saw as well.

“How’s the event going so far?” He asked, his arm intertwined with yours as you walked to the table where the food was presently nicely. 

“It’s fine, I guess. Are you enjoying it Sir?” His expression was hard to tell but alas he gave you a reassuring smile before grabbing tons of food from the table like a hamster trying to stuff all the food in his mouth. You let a stiff laugh which caught his attention, his eyebrow raised in to a question. You shook your head and continued to eat what the chef had to offer the event, the deliciously seasoned cooked meals were enough to fill you up for the night.

As the event continued to play on it was time for Kyungsoo’s speech on his company so when he left to go up on the stage you were standing right between where the people gathering around with your red silk dress that reach to the bottom of the marble floor, the crowd welcomed him with loud claps along with some warm smile you swore hid some ugly lies to them. Although you knew that Kyungsoo was loved by everyone you also knew that deep down it was also because of a hatred that stirred up inside of them, jealous that they couldn’t do what he did and instead try to take them down.

It didn’t even take a second to register that there was something fishy going on tonight. The atmosphere took by storm every minute thatpassed and you couldn’t exactly say what is was. You could see a pair of unknown eyes in the crowd that was watching you, but you couldn’t see them as the people were humbly bundled up together as Kyungsoo’s speech went on.

When his speech was done and the people continuously clapped before he walked off he abruptly frowns at you and you were confused for a bit but then felt your heart drop like hell the second when you felt a pair of hands harshly grabbing at your skin, facing a man when a simple black suit on with multiple rings on his fingers, a smile that made you wanted to run for your life you stood firmly on your grounds.

“Miss..(Y/N) isn’t it? I heard many things about you.” His voice was gravelly, low and rough that gave a shiver down your spine to which he noticed right away and smiled at Kyungsoo, sensing the fear in his eyes that took you by surprise since you never saw Kyungsoo had that look before.

“Not much of a talker huh? Well my name is Kim Joo Won.” He took your hand and placed a kiss on the surface of your skin, taking every strength of your body not to punch the dude right off the bat.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Kim Joo Won.” You said with a forced pearly white smile, your nose burning at the smell of alcohol when he got closer which made Kyungsoo walked right in front of you, instantly replacing with the cologne you warmly recognize.

“What do you want Joo Won?” Kyungsoo said in a gruff voice, you titled you head to the side to see Joo Won now smirking at Kyungsoo at the sight of you guys.

“Nothing much except for that thing that made you become known for.” Joo’s voice’s soaked in venom as his eyes danced around mischievously.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You looked at Kyungsoo to see his anger sweeping through his body, his hand formed into a fist but his voice still staying monotone. Joo Won faked a small fake laugh as he begins to walk slowly towards Kyungsoo in small steps, the clicking of his fancy shoes getting louder.

“My men sacred you didn’t they? You knew what was going to happen if you didn’t give what we wanted and yet you still want to play native?” The more Joo Won walked closer to Kyungsoo the more you fret for his life, your hand clinging onto his arm and you swore you felt Kyungsoo lessen his muscles a big from your touch. His face was now so close to Kyungsoo, his breath particularly hitting his face.

“Don’t forget Kyungsoo, you know who wants that stupid prized art piece the most.” He spat and left, pushing his shoulder in the way as he disappeared into the shadows of the room.

The amount of silence was you could only hear was unbearable even when you were in a room with so many people dining and enjoying the company of others and Kyungsoo’s absent of words was making it worse. But finally he faced you, his hair was gelled to perfection was slowly falling down, his sculptured face structure got you hypnotized for a second. 

The events that just happened seem like they didn’t even happened as he was all you could think now, never knowing what he was thinking in this moment. You saw the dust on his shoulder next to his neck and without thinking it twice you moved your hand to dusted it off, his whole body move frantically away from you and his face winced in pain as if you stabbed him there. 

“I-Kyungsoo! Are you-” 

“I’m fine.” He inhaled sharply as he closed his eyes tightly as his clasped over his neck, hissing in pain. You widen your eyes as you looked down to stare at your hands trembling. You didn’t brush it off harshly so why was he in pain?

“Let’s get out of here.” You didn’t have to say anything as he already had a grip on your hand and dragged you out the place that was all too much for you to consume.

-

When you arrived at his place your heart was still racing at the events that kept on playing in your mind. Who was the man in the ally way? Who was Kim Joo Won? What was the prized art piece? Why was Kyungsoo in pain like that? Who were those people that kept appearing in your nightmares? Once again, you felt like you were trapped in a tightly closed room with no air, with every gasp of you breathing was losing and you felt your chest constrained so tightly that you fell to you knees that stopped Kyungsoo in his tracks.

“(Y/N)!” He exclaimed as he fell to his knees and brushed your hair to your ear to see your red sweaty face but you couldn’t snap out of it, making it hard for you to catch your breath.

“Breathe in and out. That’s it.” You took Kyungsoo’s words and began to inhale and exhale, the thoughts and questions subsided and now you widen your eyes at the fact that you were in Kyungsoo’s arms in the middle of his dimly lit living room.

“O-Oh my god Kyungsoo I’m so sorry.” He shook his head and placed his hand on top of your head, comforting you as you sighed deeply in his warmth and leaned in closer to his firm chest. You could hear his loud heartbeat against your ear, letting your body relax against his and for the first time you felt it again.

The warmth that you never recognized once in all of your life. But here it was, a foreign feeling that you carved so much that you wanted to drown in it, let it consume you with all of the other feelings that came with it. The pain, the struggle of wanting to say something, it all seemed to melt away the second his long arms wrapped around your waist and you nuzzled your face against his chest once more. This was a drug that was eating you alive but you could care less as now you could feel his body move under you, his head moving down a bit and placed a small kiss on the crown of your head.

“I’m sorry about today.” His voice now low and raspy, your ears perked up.

“No, I’m sorry Sir. I didn’t mean to hurt you like that.”

“No please, call me Kyungsoo.” 

“Sir- I mean Kyungsoo” You corrected hastily, “I didn’t mean to touch you like that..”

Kyungsoo fell into a silent abyss that got you worried about but then he spoke again.

“Do you remember what that man in the ally way said?” Of course you did. It was all you could even think about. You nodded and he hesitantly continued on.

“I never really told anybody this but my parents..they never really cared about my well being and it took a while before..” He trailed off, hearing his heartbeat going faster as the minutes passed by.

“They wanted me dead. I know that for a fact.” You didn’t know what to say, your heart now dreaded at the thought of his fears of someone out there to get you was just like yours except you couldn’t exactly remember a thing at all before becoming a bodyguard. He caught on with your absent now and sighed, feeling his chest move up sightly.

“I’m sorry for bringing you all in this mess.”

“You’re my client Kyungsoo. It’s my job to protect you no matter the cost.” You tilted your head upwards against his chest to his eyes staring down at yours, those damn sweet brown eyes catching your breath. He seemed a bit disappointed by the way his wavered around, avoiding eye contact with you as he pressed his lips into a tight line before unwrapping his arms around you and pushing you away, the cool breeze that touches your skin instantly.

“I’m..gonna go to sleep.” He stood up and with a heavy heart that dropped in your stomach you were forced to see him walk away from you every time you got closer to him. You knew something had happened to him. The way he would wince away from your fingertips the moment you felt his skin prick out, his fear swimming around into his pupils every time you wanted to get closer to him. 

All of this just reminded you that you should’ve never gotten closer to him in the first place, should’ve pushed your emotions and feelings away from a man that was closed off in his own world already. But even when he pushed you away you saw his soft gentle smile whenever you were in his presence, or when you made sure whenever he wasn’t stressing out alone it gave you...hope.

And when you fell in love with him more every single day, the more distinct he putted in between him and you was ripping you apart painfully so. 

-

6 months later.

-

Many days and months have passed by since that incident and you were on the edge as you could feel something bad was going to happen. It was your natural instinct to know when something was going to jump out or when someone was going to plan something and but this, this was too hard to make it out of something.

And as the months went by, you saw Kyungsoo get more strict with how he was around you and everyone else working along besides him. You had to suck it up and pretend that it wasn’t affecting you in any way but how could you when it annoyed you so much about how he wasn’t going to even let you try to protect. Why have you around when he wasn’t going to let you do anything?

You lifted your head up at your door swing wide open in a flash, Kyungsoo’s assistant marching with her eyebrows furrowed in a bunch into your bedroom (Kyungsoo would call it the guest room but you made it into your own room) before stopping right where the bed stood in the room.

“What is it now? Gonna throw more insults at me?” You didn’t even bother to look at her as she would occasionally go into your room drunk or not and tell you were a shitty bodyguard, which you thought was a complete waste of time on her part.

 “I like to apologize (Y/N).” You widen your eyes at her sudden soft voice and whipped your head towards her direction now, her face looking down, too timid to face you.

“...Is this a joke?”

“No, I’m serious. Can’t you tell?” You shook your head and she sighed, now sitting down on the bed beside you where you stood up when she barged in.

“I..realized that I was a complete asshole to you for no reason. Well actually, scratch that, I was kinda of an asshole for one reason.” You raised your eyebrow at her, her petite face still looking at the ground as she fiddle around with her fingers in her lap.

“I wanted to be Kyungsoo for a while now and to see him so close to you was..a stab to the heart and I tried so hard to get rid of you but I see how much he cares about you (Y/N).” You felt your heart drop at the mention of his name that you didn’t even hear the rest of her sentence, so bittersweet that it hurts to even breathe but you kept it under control as she continued on

“I was around him for a while ever since he wasn’t on good terms with his parents, still isn’t. And the amount of times he got his throat constrained with a rough rope while I was there with my body tapped onto a chair was so fucking scary. They wanted what he had. Money. And that art piece he has kept around is the reason why they want him dead. It was the reason why it got his family rich in the first place. And I couldn’t protect Kyungsoo as much I like to and seeing how you kept yourself around made me really jealous and then later on angry because Kyungsoo wouldn’t believe me when I told him that you could help him, saving his life and saving him from drowning himself in those thoughts he kept.”

You felt the throat dry, the words you want to say weren’t coming out but you managed to bring yourself out of it.

“Has he ever told you those thoughts he kept to himself?” You asked softly. She now lifted her eyes from the ground and into yours, her eyes tearing up as her lips begin to tremble on their own.

“No but I do know what it’s like to not be loved by someone you want to impress so badly and to have those thoughts overwhelm you..”

Her words trailed off as well and was now placing her hands over her face, tears that were kept inside for so long was being let out and you passed over the petty drama you had between each other and embrace her in your arms, her face now crying into your shoulder while your hands rub her back to subside her tears a bit.

“But I know Kyungsoo wants you (Y/N) and I don’t want to push him into liking me if he found someone that can make him happy.” You couldn’t let go of those words once she said them out loud.

“Someone that can make him happy.”

You also felt the tears beginning to well up in your eyes and you closed them as you embrace her harder in your arms, letting the tears escape once you register that for a man to is known for his rough exterior, it’s all because of the ones he loved the most hurt him, ruined him. Made him feel like nothing to the point where he couldn’t feel people’s emotions around him because he was too busy putting his guard up on himself.

As she stopped crying and left your embrace you bid your goodbyes to her and she left your room, leaving you and the emptiness in your room be in your presence again but this time it was good. You lay your head on the soft bed, your heavy eyelids began to close down and you let yourself swim in the darkness that devour all the vision you had.

“You never learn do you?” The voice sneered at you as they harshly placed their rough hands around your swollen neck and you yelp, the pain increasing making it hard for you to breathe, their eyes right in front of you as you felt the light you once had was now vanishing by the time you tried to fight back.

You gasped and lift your upper body up as the nightmares came back up, placing your hand on your neck that had the pain thumping was now missing. You closed your eyes as you sense that this was wrong, these nightmares weren’t right. You never had them up until now and when you saw that damn painting in that hallway that one night. The pain that would appear in your neck would be gone every time you put your hand over it didn’t make sense at all. But all of this was cut off as you heard someone knocking on your bedroom door.

“Come in.” You croaked and tried to brush your hair out with your fingers, your eyes meeting with Kyungsoo’s as he stood awkwardly in your room, noticing that he was wearing the suit that he bought when you guys went shopping a few months ago.

“I need you to come with me to get some groceries.” You wanted to sass him in that moment and tell him to ask his other bodyguards to go with him but something was stopping you in your tracks to do so you all you did was nod like robots in command.

You were in your black sweatpants with a simple tank top, your nipples poking out when the slight cold breeze hits you. As you got out of your bed and began to stretch you looked over at Kyungsoo’s face all red, fake coughing in his fist and he was caught by the sly smirk on your pretty face, the hair perfectly tousled but in a cute way in his vision.

-

Kyungsoo had no problem when it came down to cooking so when it came down to grocery shopping he was quick as hell. He had the whole meal and ingredients imprinted in his mind so he was quick with the way he grab the organic items before you both headed out of the place, the cool gust of wind that hits your hands that was holds on to Kyungsoo’s arm, the scenery of the orangery sky that reminds of the many restless nights you had when you had some time alone to yourself in your bedroom when Kyungsoo was busy with his work upstairs.

As you were getting closer to his place you felt him stop, your body pulled back into a halt as you look to see Kyungsoo’s happy state of mind was now replaced with a disrupted grunt, his eyes narrowed at the right in front of him.

“So we meet again, Kyungsoo.” This time he wasn’t alone, you see as you couldn’t thought this wouldn’t get worse.

Kim Joo Won and the man you met in the ally way, a whole group of men with their pitch black expensive suits and their little toys were in their hands, grinning at the sight of a man and a woman they preceded to be helpless already.

“I’m not giving it up.” Kyungsoo said firmly, his voice meaning that he was playing around but it was all funny to Joo Won himself and his gang behind him as they laughed, their eyes twisting of joy.

“God you’re so god damn stupid. You’re the one who made this deal after all.”

“And I’m not that stupid to give in.”

“Fine. So it be idiot.” Joo Won motioned his hand to the curly hair man to you and gave you sickly evil smile on his lips.

“We’ll take your new prized pet then.” 

Fuck no you’re not!

You acted scared and screamed a raspy ‘out of breath’ no as he took your wrist spilling the groceries in the process and pulled you towards him as you quickly looked at Kyungsoo and gave him a reassuring look just before you acted even more hysterically scared out of your mind and screamed louder before Joo Won’s hand put his hand in front of your mouth.

“Your new pet is quick loud for much for my taste..” Joo won swiftly pulled a gun out of his back pocket and placed it next to your temple, seeing Kyungsoo’s emotions get the best of him as he tried to step towards you but was stopped by the other men that were holding him back down and with the curly man’s other hand with a gun in his leather gloved hands.

“I think it’s best to put her down, don’t you think Do Kyungsoo?” Kyungsoo only had eyes on you but still didn’t move as he was still afraid of what he was truly going to do with you.

But you were always one step ahead of your opponents.

In one swift movement you move your head to the side and grabbed Joo Won’s wrist moving it upward, his fingers pulling the trigger that caused to miss his firing shot and you kicked him in the stomach, causing him to let go of the gun that you caught with your free hand. You quickly started to wave your gun around at the curly hair man and the two men holding down Kyungsoo in their grip.

“You move and I’ll shoot you in the leg.” You stated, watching the man that had the gun in his hand movements carefully and cautiously. He gave you a playfully smirk and clocked his gun at you, his eyes remaining cold and steady.

“I’ll go first sweetheart.” You saw his finger about to press on the trigger to which you moved your body side by side, avoiding every shot he took before he had the gun in his hand kicked out by your kick and was shot by your bullet, his hand bleeding out crimson blood where you shot him at as he yelled out in pain, his figure bowing down before you and you took this opportunity to knock with out with his gun from the floor you picked up and shot him in leg to disable him to walk for a bit.

As you turned around you saw the rest of the members circling around you slowly, your eyes eyeing them attentively before one of them starting to dash in front of you. You then use your elbow to aim at his eyes, sensing that someone was coming up behind you so you used the blinded man as your shield quickly causing him to be shot by his own ally, discarding him as you sense another one running up towards you. In a quick flash your roughly grabbed the man by the collar of his shirt, pulling him towards you as you raised your knee to kick in in his private area as he then crouched down in pain, knocking him out with you foot kicking him upwards as he fell down to the ground unconsciously out. 

With 3 men out there were only 3 men left, all astonished by your fighting skills by never back down. All of them came at you now, leaving Kyungsoo alone as they forgot that he even existed as they were too focused on the true enemy, you.

You saw kicks, punches thrown at you at once but you were well focused at the time precision they have decided to throw their attacks on you, precisely dodging all their throws with your hands as you took the advantage to pivot your leg and extend your kick towards one of them, causing him to lose his balance leaving with you 2 men now, seeing a chance to seize you but losing their way in as you duck one of their throws, the man accidentally punching his friend in the face that left him knocked out. You smirked at the sight of his widen surprised face as you didn’t noticed the gun you held so tightly in your hand in the fight and shot in the shoulder, pushing him on to the floor in pain cursing to himself.

But the moment you turned around to Kyungsoo with a proud look on your face, you felt a gasp of air leaving your lungs that wiped that look on your face, a burning yet numb feeling you felt on your back as you feel to your knees on the concrete road. You heard Kyungsoo’s footsteps rushing to your side as he yelled your name out, also hearing someone’s chuckle behind you.

“You forgot about me, pet.” You tried to get up back the tremendous pain you felt in your back was too much for you, your vision getting blurry as blood was coming out of your back. You turned around to see him on the floor mangled in his blood, you mentally curse at yourself for being stupid as you realized that you didn’t pick up his gun you left on the ground was now in his blooded hand.

You felt Kyungsoo’s warm body near yours as he warmed a cloth around your body to apply pressure to the bloody wound before seeing his legs walking away from you and towards him, seeing the man in front of him hesitating to use his gun on him, trembling in his hand as he began to mutter that he was wrong and that Joo Won is the one he should take but you were Kyungsoo’s deadly laugh played in your ear from afar.

“Tell Jon Won to tell my parents they can never have it,” And with his final words spat in his face he kicked the gun out of his hand and out of his reach and stepped on his fingers as his bloody scream ranged in your ears. Kyungsoo then scurried along to your side and helped you get up, the pain hitting you back as you hiss and closed your eyes tightly. His touch and the smell was somewhat comforting as he lifted your body in his strong arms, his hand clasping your body as he walked back to his place.

-

“Agh..” You winced as he pulled out the bullet buried in your back, placing it on a clean napkin as he started to patch you up and you saw his hand reached out towards you with painkillers. You signed a quick thank you before taking the glass water waiting patiently on the coffee table and placing the painkillers on your tongue with your hand with your other hand placing the cold glass on your lips and gulping down the warm water, seeing Kyungsoo’s relaxed face now.

 “You shouldn’t have done that..” He mumbled to himself as he now sat next to you on the couch, his hand on top of yours. Usually those words never bothered you but it struck a twist of annoyance in your heart and you immediately stood up, facing his now shocked face with your eyebrows furrowed.

“It’s my goddamn job for Christ sake!” You lashed out and crossed your arms together when you saw his face twisted in anger and was now standing up with his face so close to yours.

“Do you realize that you could’ve died? You’re an idiot.” His last sentence took a hit at your heart and your tears began to well up but you weren’t going to let this bastard see it. You weren’t going to look weak and pathetic at his words and you definitely aren’t going to admit that his words hurt more than the bullet wound in your back. 

But it was too late as he already saw a glimpse of your face, the line that he crossed in your eyes and the line he secretly swore to never cross it but it was happening right before in his eyes as million thoughts raced in his mind. He reached for your hand but you instantly drew it back as you formed into a fist to remind you to really not saw your state right now as you looked back at him.

“(Y/N)-”

“It was either you or me that they were going to kill and you know damn well that I’ll do anything if it means to keep you safe Kyungsoo. God damnit I love you.”

You screamed on top of your lungs, those words that were hidden inside of you for so long were now out in the open. His eyes were now like saucepans, his ears catching on but he couldn’t say a word as you already ran out of the living room and rushed towards upstairs and into your room, not bothering to close the door as you let your body fall on the bed and finally let the tears fall down.

You couldn’t believe it. You said those words but it was too late to take it back. Was he going to fire you? Let you off?

You heard someone knocking on your door, turning around to see Kyungsoo’s guilty face but you were too upset to say anything and turned your attention on the soft covers. He signed and took a few seconds before filling the space in your room.

“You make it so hard for me to not love you (Y/N).”

Your heart stops.

You held in your breath as he said those exact words out of his lips. You prayed to god that he can’t hear your heartbeat as you now felt his hand caressing your back, the touch you desperately ache for so long.

“I want to protect you in my arms and but I’m a coward. I can’t even fight, let alone lend off a few guys. I’m so scared that every time you leave even just for a second because I don’t know if you’re to be like everyone who has left me in my life. You’re all I have and I hate that I’m so selfish. I’m sorr-”

You cut him off with your lips when you stood up, feeling the pent up frustration you had pushed deep is now regaining confidence to release it. He was in shock but was soon replaced with his soft lips moving against yours, his hands capturing your face as he deepens the kiss. You let him take control as he was now on top of you, your back resting against the sheets. You spread your legs and he moves in to close the space between you and him with his lower body placed on your core, his mouth swallowing your moans as he grinds on you while his hands are now aggressively kneading your ass. When he pulled his lips from yours, leaving a line of saliva you whined, grabbing his tie you tightly in your grip.

“Be as loud as you want baby girl.” You shivered at his words, feeling your pussy getting wetter as you saw that look on his face, the look of a predator finally getting the prey. He took his long slim fingers and grab the end of your tank top, you lifted your body a bit so he can get it off of you, throwing it across the room as he continued to plant his pillow lips on the valley of your breast. You let out a small gasp when you felt his mouth latched onto one of your breast, his soft and wet tongue playing with your hard nipple as he used his other free hand to massage on your other breast. You put your fingers in his hair, messing it in the process as you couldn’t stop slipping out your breathy moans as he attacked your breasts with his lips you thought you would never got to taste for once in your life.

“K-Kyungsoo- Ah!” His fingers were sliding inside of you now, his eyes lovingly looking into yours as he continued to torture you sweetly by going slow, your hips buckling up as you felt the pleasure blossoming inside your core.  You begged for more and the mental image that Kyungsoo saw with his own eyes wanted more of it too. Your face flushed red, messy hair, and your body screaming to be touched by him made all the more reasons to give you more pleasure. He took off your sweatpants off along with your black panties, revealing your dripping wet pussy to him that shined in the dim lights in your room.

You couldn’t help but feel embarrassed as you never had anyone intimately stare at you like that, especially when you’re fully naked right in front of a fully clothed man who you didn’t know wanted this as much as you did. You put your hand over you pussy but he caught your hand before you got cover it.

“Don’t. You look so beautiful (Y/N) don’t be embarrassed.” You nodded, red dusting on your cheeks as you pulled back your shaky hands and rested them to the side, Kyungsoo dipping his mouth onto your cunt and you instantly grip the sheets so hard. This was ecstasy. The way he licked you and sucked on your clit was better than any other feeling you had experience. His tongue was exploring every part of your pussy, slipping his tongue in your hole every time you asked for more, begged for more of his tongue inside of you hole as you grabbed onto the locks of his dark hair.

“I’m gonna cum-!” You moan loudly as you came on his face, his tongue licking your juices until you were clean but his face was still wet with your juices but he wasn’t bothered but it was he wiped it off clean. You lifted your body up to get rid of the suit he had on him, till you reached his fancy pants that showed his tight restrained bulge inside. When you grabbed his bulge inside you hand he let out a deep groan, his eyes shut tightly as you began to pull his zipper down to reveal his cock that was red and standing upwards, your mouth drooling at the sight.

You placed your bruised lips on the tip of his cock, the taste of his pre cum was salty but you liked it, teasing him as you never fully put him inside of your mouth but placed your wet kisses on around his cock, having his name on his lips sounding like heaven to your ears. After having enough of teasing you engulfed him in your mouth, his girth extending your mouth but it was comfortable enough for you as you proceed to use your hand to rub his thick length as you suck him off, his moans bouncing off the walls.

You continued to stroke him more now, your tongue delicately wrapping around his hard red cock with your cheeks hollowing in a sucking motion as you feel him about to come but you were soon pulled away, looking up with your hooded eyes as you saw Kyungsoo’s pouty face appear. You placed your hand on his sweaty chest, leaning in to his ear so close that he shivers at the touch of your lips grazing it softly.

“I want you to cum inside of me.” You didn’t have to ask twice as he pushed you gently on the bed, asking you if your wound was okay. You quickly nodded and waited for him patiently, his pants now gone and was now on top of you fully naked only for you to admire and touch.

He glided his cock on to your pussy, gently pushing you in and checking in if you were in pain or uncomfortable but it all came rushing down to the pit of your core, biting down your lips hard as he was fully inside of your dripping pussy. His slow thrusts inside of your walls made you legs tremble and shake as he reached his hand out to your breasts that was covered with his huge hand.

“Faster..Please.” You were crumbling the more you his thrusts snapped into your core, his breathing getting more erratic and your fingers were gripping on the bed sheets were the only thing that kept you in control, shutting your eyelids tightly as a knot was forming.

Just like that you both came together, his cum filling you up as he rides out both of yours guys high. It took a few minutes to regain your breath before you lifted your face to his and planted a kiss, his lips moving with yours as you were brought into a warm embrace in his strong arms throughout the starry night.

-

The smell of bacon and pancakes tickled your nostrils, bringing your hands into fists to rub your eyes and let out a loud yawn, noticing that Kyungsoo wasn’t beside you in bed but you knew it was him in the kitchen making breakfast. You jumped out of the bed and just got dressed in one of his shirts you had borrowed months ago but kept forgetting to give it to him along pairing it with a cute white lacy thong, the shirt was barely covering your ass but you liked it enough to keep it that way and made your way to the kitchen.

The smell of the food being deliciously made was getting stronger when you approach the kitchen, seeing Kyungsoo’s shirtless back with a pair of grey sweatpants along with his hair all messed up from you was definitely a sight you would love to see more.

“Hey.” You didn’t know that he noticed your presence in an instant, an angelic smile graced on his lips and you smiled back, taking a seat as he puts a plate full of food in front of you and places a small peck on your cheek causing you to blush like a red tomato.

The morning with Kyungsoo was fairly pleasant, the sounds of birds chirping and the news that he had time to take you out tonight was all good news that you made you genuinely felt the happening so wanted to cherish forever.

“I know we were both tired from..the actives last night but..” you giggled as you saw his ears getting red, his eyes not looking at you.

“Will you be my girlfriend (Y/N)?” You squealed and yelled out yes, standing up to walk over to where he sat across from you and hugged him, his scent so friendly and tender to your heart. Kyungsoo couldn’t resist a smile breaking out on his mouth as he hugged you tightly, his head resting on your shoulder.

As you guys finished cleaning the dishes together you saw something out of the corner of your eyes, a white envelope sitting out. Kyungsoo’s traced where your eyes were looking at and placed his hand on your shoulder, leaning into your ear where his hot breath hits you gently.

“My assistant said this was for you. She told me that two people approached her last night.” And with that information he left silently, leaving you anticipating who wanted you to have this envelope. Opening it up it was a simple written letter in black pen but you felt your heart instantly dropped when you saw the names of the owner.

Dear (Y/N),

Don’t forget that we exist. If your dad and I can make you, surely we can insure you that we can destroy every last bit of your existence. You can’t hide forever sweetie.

Yours Truly, Elizabeth (Same Last Name).

The letter dropped on the ground, your legs trembling in fear as you walked backwards in fear until you felt the cool fridge touch your back.

It can’t be.

Those nightmares.

That painting you saw that looked so similar to those pictures you kept when you were a child

Wondering who you were all this time.

You started at your hands that touched the letter at disgusted, the weight that was once on you was crushing you ten times more. You closed your eyes and slid down, crouching to get away from reality as much as possible.

She was going to get you.

But you weren’t going to back down, never.

And with that you stood up, hastily making your way to the gym to train as harder as you could with all your might. The painting that stood in Kyungsoo’s hallway that once made you feel the pain mentally was gone as you were ready for it, you know.

I’ll be waiting, mother.

-

A/N: hope you guys enjoy this :) next one is Kai and im vv excited to write his next !! please let me know what you think about this fic and hope you have a fantastic day/night.

[brokecollegenerd]

Guardian of an Idol

Guardian

A person of the human species homo custos. Lives on the Island in the Pacific Ocean. In charge of protecting the world’s politicians and entertainers, be it through security or as a personal bodyguard

After waiting a nearly year, Seoyeong is finally given her first assignment which takes her to a newly debut group in South Korea. Prepared and ready to face the struggles that comes from being a Guardian of the kpop community, she sets off to fulfill her duty to the best of her ability. Little does she know that not only is her group of idols doomed but so is she and the rest of the Guardians that protect them

[justwritedreams]

Promise You | Baekhyun

Bodyguard Baekhyun x Reader Word count: 3837 Genre: slight angst, action. Author: maari Warnings: Mentions of blood, guns, death, violence and language. Note: It seems kind of rushed but I kind of liked it? Request: Could you write a bodyguard Baekhyun?  ⫷ Exo Masterlist

Y/N sighed as she entered the house, missing the way things were before her father became a very powerful and well-known man.

It was all easier when they lived in a big apartment for the two of them to live together, they didn't have employees, they didn't have a specialized security team like the army.

Also,they didn't have the windows in the house being broken by stones thrown by strangers.

Y/N's father was a successful businessman but he wanted to explore his political side and ran, he ended up winning and went on to have a seat in parliament. But this cost the security and peace of the family.

A family that was made up of just the two of them, father and daughter.

Now, after 2 years of winning, they had moved into a house. A gated community downtown, close to his new job.

The father was fixated on the idea of ​​ending organized crime, he had messed with big lions who now seemed to be ready to threaten the parliamentarian, starting with letters and even the stones on the windows of the house.

"Daughter?" heard her father's voice coming from the office next to the stairs and went there.

The door was open and her father was sitting in the chair behind the big desk, he kept his chin on his hands and his eyes worried.

"Come in." spoke as he saw her raise a hand to knock on the door.

Y/N pushed the door aside and walked into the office, realizing that she and her father weren't the only ones there. The man had his back to her, so all she could see was his suit as black as his hair, his slender body, and rigid posture.

She found it strange but didn't greet the man, after all he didn't even turn to face her.

“I would like to introduce you to Byun Baekhyun.” the father pointed his hand at the man in the room and Y/N turned to look at him, eyebrow raised.

Another ally of her father's?

He turned around, now turning all his attention to her and Y/N was taken aback by the man's jovial features, the hair parted perfectly in the middle so that the face carried by a serious expression could be well analyzed.

He wasn't the kind of guy you thought was in politics.

"He will be your bodyguard."

Y/N turned her head so fast to look at her father that her neck made a noise, she frowned in confusion and her mouth open didn't know what to say so she just chuckled through her nose.

She continued to laugh, from surprise to disbelief and took turns looking between the boy and her father, hoping they would deny it or that maybe she hadn't heard correctly.

But the two of them remained serious and that made her stop laughing.

"What?" she moved her hands nonstop near her ear, as if to indicate that she hadn't heard right. "I think I didn’t get it."

“Your new bodyguard, he will take care of your security.” the father repeated and Y/N had to blink a few times to process the information.

The father already had a security team that took care of the house, why would she have a private security? A shadow behind her?

She'd heard him say he was going to beef up security, but she hadn't imagined that would be it.

"You can leave, I need to talk to my father alone." Y/N spoke without looking back at the man, she was too busy squinting at her own father.

He nodded at Baekhyun who left in complete silence, closing the door behind him.

"There's no need for me to have a bodyguard." Y/N started talking as she approached her father's table. "I'm working from home, I hardly go out at night."

“We were attacked inside the house, daughter. Here it is not safe. And I want to make sure that no one will hurt you, no matter where you are.”

She bit her tongue to give the answer she wanted. If they were in their old house, this wouldn't be happening.

“And you had to hire a private?” she pointed to the door behind her. “What makes him so different from the bouncers who are already here?”

"He's reliable." Y/N crossed her arms at her father's response. That wasn't enough. “He is experienced in delicate situations, he is ex-military.”

Y/N laughed in disbelief.

“Now I should suddenly feel better?” she asked sarcastically and her father sighed.

"Daughter, please, I'm doing this thinking of you." he justified and she shook her head.

What irritated her the most was that she couldn't do much more than accept. Even if she said no, it wouldn't make a difference. The father would keep the bodyguard because he would feel too guilty about leaving her unprotected.

"Since I can't convince you otherwise." she shrugged and walked out of the office, slamming the door open and leaving it like that anyway.

It shouldn't come as a surprise that Baekhyun was outside, standing by the door in the same rigid position and Y/N snorted at the sight of him there.

She intended to ignore him, so climbed the stairs and strode to her room, where she could probably have privacy, but stopped midway when she saw him following her.

"What are you doing?" she asked nervously still without looking back.

“Following orders.” he replied dryly and she rolled her eyes.

So he was going to watch her even inside the house?

She continued to walk to her room and turned around already inside the room, her hand on the door.

"I don't need a babysitter in the house." Y/N spoke through gritted teeth, glaring at him.

But Baekhyun didn't look intimidated, he kept the same expression. One she couldn't decipher.

"It's not what your father thinks." he responded more firmly and she huffed, slamming hard the door in his face.

Y/N took a deep breath and ran a hand over her face.

It couldn't get any worse.

[...]

In fact, things got worse.

It had been a month since Baekhyun was Y/N's official bodyguard and she had never felt so smothered and watched.

She couldn't put her foot out of the room that there was his slender figure, with the same expression as always, not even a smile he had still given inside that house.

When she worked in the office or library, he would stay in the room with his eyes focused on the window and the defensive position made her tense, which was why she rarely went to work anywhere in the house other than her bedroom. At least she could be there in peace. Well, of course she had to fight a lot with her father to have her room out of the bodyguard's duties, it would be too much for her, but she had managed.

That night, she ate dinner alone. Her father was too busy to arrive on time and she sat at the table alone while Baekhyun kept his eyes fixed on her, it was probably the quietest dinner she ever had in her life.

When she got up, one of the maids came into the dining room.

“Miss, they had a package delivered to your father.” she spoke quietly and Y/N frowned.

“From who?”

"It's from his work."

Y/N still found it suspicious but shrugged, probably some letter from a political ally of her father as well as others he had already received, she rose from the chair.

"Where is it?"

"In the office."

"Thank you." smiled at the maid who left silently, Y/N left the dining room and went to the office, followed by Baekhyun and she just rolled her eyes.

When arrived in the room, she saw a box on the table and went to it but before she could touch the object, Baekhyun placed himself in front of her blocking her view and advancing her action, he took the note stuck on top of the box while she looked in disbelief.

But what a cheeky fellow, she thought.

“Is reading personal letters one of your assignments too?” she asked irritably, crossing her arms and Baekhyun just stepped to the side, keeping a safe distance between the two.

Definitely professional.

"I need to make sure it's safe." he replied monotonously and Y/N started stomping her foot on the floor waiting for him to do so.

But seeing that Baekhyun's posture suddenly changed, she felt an anxiety grip her legs and rise to her stomach.

"What?" she asked worriedly.

For the first time her eyes met Baekhyun's and he kept his eyes fixed on hers, his jaw set and his expression serious, she felt a shiver down her spine and he held out the card.

Y/N took the paper from his hand and Baekhyun's cold fingers brushed against hers, making the exchange of looks last for a few more seconds, with the atmosphere different now, Y/N looked down at the card and busied herself with that. .

But seeing the explicit threat on the card, she felt fear. Pure and simple.

“The stone is not even the beginning. Give up your candidacy or your daughter will be the next victim."

Next victim?

Y/N swallowed hard feeling her eyes fill with tears and felt Baekhyun put his hand on her shoulder and push her back, without time to digest the threat she just stared at the bodyguard confused.

He was looking at the box, keeping Y/N behind him for protection, his arm outstretched so she wouldn't cross.

“Stay away.”

“What is it now?” she wanted to sound firm but her voice failed.

"We need to get out of here." Baekhyun turned around, now facing Y/N who was frowning.

Before she could say anything or demand an explanation, a loud noise echoed through the room and made Baekhyun hug her, covering her entire body while Y/N just closed her eyes, feeling him force their bodies down.

The two crouched down and realizing that nothing had changed after a few seconds, Baekhyun pulled his torso back far enough to be able to look back, feeling her head spin and completely confused she did the same, looking in the same direction.

The box on the table was now destroyed, proving that the bomb inside had been harmless to Y/N. For now.

Y/N felt tears fall as she realized what it could have done to her if it had been a real bomb and she started to shake in fear. Baekhyun turned to her and when he saw the woman's wet face, he held her by the waist and made her stand up, wobbly legs forced him to help her stand.

"Come with me." his voice was different from the few times they had spoken so far, it was soft, comforting.

He carried her to her room, no complaints, and made her sit on the bed while he bent down to examine every inch of her body to make sure she was safe.

Seeing that she didn't have any scratches, he started to get up to talk to the security team, but Y/N stopped him, holding onto his fist with shaking hands, causing him to stop where he was.

"No." Y/N's low voice took him by surprise, he had to strain to hear it. “Stay here, please.”

Not knowing what to do, he obeyed, returning to the position he was in. Kneeling in front of her while Y/N still kept her hands on his fist, the sleeve of the black blazer he wore had risen slightly and he could feel Y/N's icy fingers tighten around his fist, as if to make sure he wouldn't get out of there.

"Everything is fine now." he assured quietly and Y/N's lost gaze indicated that she wasn't paying attention to him, probably with her mind elsewhere. "Hey."

Baekhyun placed a hand over Y/N's holding him, the firm, warm contact against her icy skin made her blink a few times before staring at him with sad, frightened eyes.

“You're fine, no one will hurt you. I promise."

Y/N felt a shiver down her spine and couldn't look away from Baekhyun, but she still felt insecure, nothing felt right.

"I don’t want to be alone." she pleaded and Baekhyun felt his shoulders sag, unconsciously he stroked her hand.

"You won’t. You will not be alone. I will protect you, whatever the cost.”

[...]

The following week was a little troubled.

Y/N's father was angry, he just didn't fire the entire security team because Baekhyun assured him that there was an infiltrator and they would need a trap to catch whoever it was.

The bomb sent didn't have the power to hurt anyone, it was just a threat but it made it clear that whoever was behind all the attacks had eyes and ears everywhere.

In a private conversation between Y/N's father and Baekhyun, it was stated that he would work alone. He couldn't trust anyone but he would protect Y/N anyway, he had been in worse situations and that wouldn't make him give up the job.

He assured the boss that he would give his life for Y/N if he had to and received Y/N's father's full trust.

She, on the other hand, was too scared inside the house to think about questioning her father about what was happening. She didn't want to leave her room, she didn't want to work, she just wanted her quiet, normal life back.

Unfortunately for her, a large company contract was about to close and the client had set up a meeting at a restaurant downtown.

This forced her to leave the house, with Baekhyun and two other security guards.

But something inside her told her this wasn't a good idea, and the fact that her stomach fluttered the entire way indicated that it wasn't the anxiety that was doing this to her, it was the feeling she was having.

The situation between her and Baekhyun seemed… better. Well, they hadn't become best friends overnight but Y/N knew that the fact that he'd seen her vulnerable had changed things.

Also, knowing he was ready to protect her had changed her impression of him a little. Baekhyun hadn't been rude to her that night, he was understanding.

He stayed in the room with her until Y/N fell asleep, which took a long time to happen, and when she woke up the next day he was there, sitting in the armchair in the corner of the room with the alert posture, visibly ready to take any action.

She felt protected from that day forward and his presence behind her, even indoors, was no longer a nuisance. It was a certainty that she would be fine.

Y/N was putting her phone into her bag when a bang on the glass broke her ears and she just saw the driver's body fall to the side of the door, and a spray of blood flew all over the interior of the car.

"What the fu-" the security man sitting on the driver's side said but didn't even finish because the side of his window was also hit and Y/N felt her whole body go cold as her eyes widened, feeling the hot blood rush to her face.

She screamed, in fright and fear.

“Get down!” Baekhyun yelled and pulled her to do it, laying her face on the back seat, he did the same while the armored car was hit by several shots.

All she did was cover her head as the shards of glass scattered and fell on top of her.

Y/N felt her heart beating so fast through her body and her wobbly legs that she didn't know what to do, what to focus on.

"Go to the floor." Baekhyun ordered and she did so promptly, lifting her head to face him, watching him take his gun off his waist and unlock it. “Take it.”

He tossed a telephone set she had never seen in her life and caught it with shaking hands.

"Press the number 0 that will go straight into the line with the army, let them know you're with me." he spoke firmly and she frowned.

"What are you-" she didn't even have time to finish the question, Baekhyun had already opened the car door and got out.

The shots got louder and she screamed, cringing and pushing the button anyway and bringing the device to her ear, when the other end of the line answered she didn't even wait.

“They're shooting at my car, I'm Y/N, the deputy's daughter. I'm with Baekhyun… huh… Byun! Byun Baekhyun. They killed my security.” the choked voice from crying made Y/N have to strain her throat to speak. "He's out there, do something, they'll kill us!"

"Don't step out of line, miss!" the voice spoke and she nodded even though the person couldn't see.

Y/N didn't know how much time had passed, but it felt like an eternity and Baekhyun was coming back, throwing himself into the car seat and closing the door, his breath heavy and sweat running down his face.

She opened her mouth to talk to him but all he did was take the phone out of her hand and talk to the person on the other end of the line, screaming as the car was hit with more shots and Y/N covered her ears, closing eyes and feeling wet her face from tears.

“We’re going to die!” she screamed, desperate but that's what she felt. She was scared, worse, terrified.

“Y/N.”

"We're going to die and I haven't done anything important with my life!"

“Y/N!”

"WHAT?"

She opened her eyes and saw Baekhyun lower himself to the floor on the other side, gun in one hand, he held her face with the other that was free.

He stared at her so deeply that everything else seemed to disappear.

“We’re not going to die!” he promised and she didn't know what to say.

She just let herself be carried away by his dark iris that, more than comfort, brought security. At that moment, the shots seemed insignificant and she was sure it was because she was about to die but his face so close up looked like a vision of paradise, maybe angels looked the same as his.

Completely lost in Baekhyun's eyes, Y/N only came back to reality when a loud explosion outside the car echoed through the street and she felt her heart in her mouth as she cringed.

“Oh fuck!” she yelled, putting her hands to her head, her ears ringing.

But contrary to what she had imagined, nothing happened to her. The shots suddenly stopped and she could only see Baekhyun chuckling as she looked up and saw his chest rising and falling. "You're laughing?!" she asked in disbelief, watching him get off the floor of the car and sit on the seat, looking through what was left of the windows.

"I didn't know you swore." he said, amused.

She looked at him, almost offended.

“I hadn’t suffered an attack until then!” she complained and saw him smirk.

Baekhyun didn't say anything, he just extended his hand to her, who was reluctant to hold it or not, but hearing sirens in the background, she just sighed and held his palm.

Soft, warm skin welcomed her in a way that lifted her off the floor. Baekhyun opened the car door and got out, bringing Y/N with him.

When she got out of the car she could see the damage on the street. They had stopped at the traffic lights near the bridge, some bodies on the ground and several weapons thrown while a car caught fire a few meters away, her own car had several punctures from the bullets and the shattered windows were covered in blood.

It was because of that and the fact that she had been crouched down on the floor for so long that her legs gave out and Baekhyun had to help her, supporting her against the car.

"Sorry." he was serious later and put the gun in his waist again and she stopped staring at the scene to face him again, now confused. “For laughing, I just wanted to… improve the mood after this.”

Y/N looked down, she wanted to thank him for trying to make her forget what had happened for a brief moment but the fact is that it would take her a while to forget about the bombing and the fact that she was almost shot dead. Her gaze stopped on Baekhyun's left arm, the suit he was wearing had a cut and blood was oozing.

She approached, placing her hand close to the affected area.

“Oh my God, you got shot.” she spoke worriedly, feeling as if her heart had been shot. “We need to take care of this-”

Y/N started to leave to go to the oncoming ambulances, but Baekhyun stopped her with his hand.

"It just grazed, I'm fine." he assured and put his hands on her shoulders, looking her up and down. "You okay? Are you hurt?”

Y/N shook her head, shy that he was so close again but grateful that he was worrying about her like that, even though he was hurt.

"I just want to go home." she passed her hand on face and when felt something wet between her fingers, she remembered the scene of the security guards being killed in front of her and the blood splashing everywhere.

Taking her fingers from her face, she stared at them smeared with blood and her hand was shaking with a mix of emotions. Fear, anger, relief, sadness, guilt… so many she couldn't even describe each one.

"Hey." Baekhyun spoke, taking the hand she was facing and lowering it so Y/N could look at him. "Don't think about it."

"But it's my fault-" she started but was interrupted by him, who took a step towards her and brought his hands to cover both sides of her face, making her face the dark iris again.

“Y/N, that's not on you, okay?” he nodded and Y/N nodded. "You're the most innocent in this story, but I promise you, they won't get to you."

She was silent, his conviction made her truly believe in every word and she felt her eyes fill with tears as her body trembled, on an impulse she hugged him tight. Holding his clothes as if her life depended on it.

He didn't back down but it took a while to reciprocate and when he did, he held her tighter, stroking her hair as she cried silently, her body finally reacting to the attack.

"I will protect you."

[marshmallow-phd]

Updated and Detailed WIPs

This is the approximate release order I have planned once my current fics start ending. These are subject to change given what mood I’m in once a fic ends. I hope you’re looking forward to them!  

The Clone - Junmyeon Lucky One AU (Part of the Experiments Universe) - Your biggest skill as a homicide detective was your relentlessness. You didn’t give up until you’d found the answer you were looking for. And that was going to get you in trouble some day. After several high profile murders occur, you’re sure that there’s a connection. But when your boss tells you to stand down, you go off on your own, determined to catch the hired killer. All the training in the world could never prepare you for the person waiting for you at the end of the trail. That is, if he doesn’t kill you first. 

Chasing Wind - Jongin Wolf AU (Part of the Untamed) - Life tended to hit you from all sides. When a strange boy literally runs into you at your job, you think things might be looking up for once. Until he lets you in on a secret that you couldn’t have guessed in a million years and your entire world is spun on its head.

Blood on His Hands - Yixing Mafia AU (Spinoff of Secret in His Eyes) - As a doctor, you took an oath to care for anyone who needed your help. You hadn’t exactly thought of a mafia leader when you swore to those words. After saving his life, you’d hoped you’d be allowed to go on your way. If only. The one person on your side was the doctor to the gang who didn’t seem to fit in with the rest. And that within itself was the greatest danger to you.

Always Remember - Jaehyun Anastasia!AU - You were an orphan with no memory of your past. He was a man searching for a quick payday. When the two of you cross paths, you’re taken on a journey through the past that could propel you to the future you’ve always wanted. But is it the right one for you? (Up in the air if I’ll ever actually write this one or not)

A Million Shards of Glass - Junmyeon Spy AU - details to be determined

Feel free to ask questions (spoilers will be responded to with the appropriate gif lol) and let me know what you think and which ones you’re excited about! 

[iridescentxstars]

behind closed doors — kim jongin

➳ published: 15.08.19 ➳ bodyguard!au || ceo!au || yandere!au || genre: implied smut || angst || rated: m ➳ pairing: kim jongin x reader | kim wonsik x reader ➳ summary: Things come to those who least expect them but like everything else - happiness comes with a price. ➳ word count: 3.6k ➳ warnings: character death, implied smut, hidden relationship

Moans echo around the room, whispers of names mixed in with the sound of skin slapping against skin, the hot and heavy scent of sex in the air while the light of dawn filters through the gap in the curtain. Breath hot on your already burning skin, his thick purple dyed hair damp with sweat as he leaves wet kisses along the curve of your neck; a neck marked lightly with his love, his possessive need to show the world that you belong to him.

A need to show the world something that shouldn’t exist.

Kim Jongin is your bodyguard, your protection, he has been for the last two years but recently he’s grown to become something more. There are no words to describe who he is, what he is, because a bodyguard shouldn’t know the taste of his charge’s skin, how they look bathed in the post coitus glow of the moonlight that dances along their sensitive skin.

He’s addicted to the way you feel, how you melt into him with little to no coaxing; you’re addicted to his lips, his tongue whispering honey laced words when no one is watching. Subtle touches, a glance now and again, the intrigue of indulging in something forbidden being his downfall in the beginning and Jongin knew that he shouldn’t keep this up but you kept coming back for more. You couldn’t help yourself, loving the way he would say your name, how his lips would quirk upwards in the faintest of smiles and you found yourself falling.

Falling in love with your bodyguard.

A little over two years ago, shortly after moving to Seoul to run the Korean branch of your father’s business, a man entered your office with this strong aura and cold expression on his otherwise handsome face. Introducing himself as Kim Jongin, he bows and informs you that he has been hired as your bodyguard by your father; you were not surprised by this, your father runs a billion dollar company and his reach is global so it would make sense that he would do anything to protect his only heir and only child.

Back then, his hair was a soft brown that hung in his almond-shaped, ever watching eyes; he always hung back, never in your personal space and he would only refer to you as ‘Ms. Y/L/N’. You rarely dealt with problems but Jongin was ever thorough, always checking to make sure places were clear and safe for you to enter, giving background checks on people you met or were associated with and even questioning a man’s motives when he asked you out on a date at work.

Kim Jongin was a professional; he knew how to do his job and he did it well.

If you were asked to pinpoint the moment where the paradigm shifted, where Jongin went from being a professional and keeping his distance to being something more, you wouldn’t be able to give a true response because you don’t know. You don’t know who started this burning passion that consumes you both, you don’t know whether it was how he’s swooped in to save you more times than you can count or how the way he slowly started to call you by your first name became something you wanted to hear whispered under the stars.

All you know is that you shouldn’t be falling into him, shouldn’t be longing for him but you cannot help how the way his dark eyes linger on your flushed skin causes you to shiver with delight.

Jongin cannot seem to get enough of you, the way you’re splayed out in front of him, bedroom eyes looking up at him with a faint smirk teasing along your lips. He’s breathless, you steal the air right out of his lungs and there is nothing he would rather feel beneath his fingertips than the soft warmth of your skin. Your beauty is beyond everything he could imagine, your kindness unmatched and even though Jongin knows that loving you is forbidden, he would do it all again.

Was it how he would protect you when you needed him? Always there in a pinch to save you from one of many disastrous dates that your father would set you up on; or was it how he would literally put his body on the line for you? Opting to get caught in the rain so you wouldn’t get wet, holding the umbrella over your head as you waited for your driver to arrive. You remember how his white dress shirt clung to his skin, his hair pushed out of his face as he didn’t utter a single word of annoyance or complaint in getting soaked to the bone. You missed your meeting that day, not caring because that’s why you have a board of directors so that you wouldn’t have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders.

Did he fall because of your kindness? He had never met a woman of your stature who had a heart like yours, how you chided him in the car on the way to your apartment even as he protested that he was fine. He would have been, Jongin has dealt with worse but you ignored him, noticing how his skin erupted in goosebumps from the sudden chill that was seeping into his bones. You rushed him into your apartment, pointing him towards the bathroom as you rush to the bathroom to make a hot drink to warm him up with; your delicate hands pushing against his back before leaving his body sent shocks throughout him. It wasn’t an intimate touch but it awakened something inside him that Jongin never suspected that he could be capable of feeling.

The sun bathes you in gold, shimmering against Jongin’s skin as you pull him into you, moulding your bodies as if you’re trying melt into him while lips connect as if you need him to survive.

You never expected that moment to spark such a burning, overwhelming passion inside you. Jongin walking out of your bathroom, damp hair hanging in his eyes, skin still wet from the shower with a towel wrapped his waist; he looked like an Adonis, like the Gods took special care to shape every inch of him to perfection. A wary step forward, eyes never leaving his as you came to stop in front of him; Jongin only looks away to watch your hand, slowly lifting before you place it on his chest, trailing down until you reach the top of sculpted abdomen.

Tension grows thick, neither of you move as the seconds tick by; your heart races while his breathing increases and that’s when it hit you, what you were doing. You stepped back, blinking as if breaking the spell while you stuttered an apology.

Caught in a haze, you crossed a line, not realising that the subtle changes had been happening before this moment.

You never noticed how the distance between you had lessened, that touches and glances lasted longer than they should and how a tick would appear in his jaw every time your father sent another suitor to your office. Jongin couldn’t help that you became a focal point of his day, his attention focused on you and every slight movement you made; his fingers itched to touch you while your skin was begging to be touched.

Jongin caught you before you managed to get too far, caging you against the back of your couch as he pressed closer, growing bolder as he watched the blood tickle your cheeks pink from his proximity. “Jongin,” he sighed when he heard how you whispered his name, unable to keep himself in check as he leant down to kiss you.

A kiss that erupted every nerve in your body and made him crave you more – you didn’t want this moment to end, holding on for it as long as you could. Hooked on him, you lost all rationality as you dragged Jongin from your living area to your room with Jongin having dropped the towel and deft hands making quick work of your dress.

His hand rests against the small of your back as he helps you out of the car, you give him a soft smile before tossing your hair over your shoulder and walk towards the building looming over you. You were given instructions to meet with a man by the name of Kim Wonsik, you wish you could tell your father that these blind dates were becoming tedious but you cannot expose what you have – you’ll lose it otherwise.

You feel Jongin’s tension from behind you, he’s done the background check on Wonsik and even though you remind him that there is no man you want other than him, it doesn’t stop his heart from worrying. He won’t tell you, his face stoic as he stands at an arms-length in the elevator but you can see it in his eyes and in the way his broad shoulders tense the moment you enter Wonsik’s office.

In the past, he would have been the kind of man who would have had your head turning, captivating you instantly but even as you admire his strong, dominating presence, you can’t help but compare him to Jongin. They stand at the same height, barely any difference and though neither speak or even glance at each other, they are both acutely aware of the other’s presence in the room.

Wonsik’s suit is all black and pressed, tailored to hug and show off the muscles he proudly has underneath. He keeps the top three buttons of his dress shirt unbuttoned and you see the dark ink of a tattoo showing across the collarbone; his ears pierced and piercing eyes, Wonsik definitely knows how to command attention with nothing more than a look.

Jongin wears a white fitting dress shirt with a black vest and tie, his black slacks and polished leather shoes show off his remarkable body proportions without taking away his powerful aura; he wears a holster and wrapped around his arm is an emergency pack. His hair recently dyed to a pinkish purple after you had mentioned how much you loved it last time, his eyes flit around the room before focusing back on you and Wonsik.

You bow your head, noticing how a small smile lifts up the corners of Wonsik’s lips, “I do apologise for whatever pressure my father has placed on you to meet me.” You give a polite smile, the one you always give when meeting suitors, “he seems to be rushing these days, hurrying to marry me off and have children.” Wonsik chuckles, inviting you to take a seat on the couch as he follows you.

Jongin knows he cannot move any closer, keeping a respectable distance and not interfering until you give the cue that you are ready to leave – until then he waits by the closed office door, observing this man who thinks he’s competition.

“Your father just wanted us to meet, a formality to my father who is an old friend of your family,” you cock an eyebrow. You had never even heard your father mention his name until the day before, wouldn’t you have known about his family if they were old friends? “Sorry, my father was Kim Hyuksoo.”

Your eyes widen, “sorry, I didn���t realise,” Wonsik laughs, he knew you may not have known who he was so he isn’t offended by it. “Are you now running the business here in Seoul?”

The small talk is boring, you can feel Jongin’s eyes on you; it makes you feel hot under the collar by the intensity of his stare. You can feel him undressing you with his eyes, imagining all the ways he’s had you and all the ways he could have you; you swallow thickly, sparing a glance in his direction when Wonsik has his back turned. There’s a hint of a smirk playing on his lips, he knows you’re trying your best to remain completely unaffected by him, something you do on a daily basis but there’s something about this – tasting the forbidden fruit – that makes it all the more dangerous.

“Shall I take you out for dinner this weekend?” You turn your attention to Wonsik, who’s passing you a business card with his personal number written on the back, “some place informal where we don’t need the chauffeur hanging around.” He inclines his head playfully Jongin and that action causes Jongin’s tongue to roll along the inside his cheek as he prepares himself to leave.

You stand, smiling politely, “I’ll text you tomorrow to sort out details,” you answer before moving towards the door. Jongin bows his head slightly as he opens the door for you and throws one last look back at Wonsik, his eyes watching you leave while trailing down your thighs.

You can feel the heat radiating from Jongin as he walks a step behind you, the jealousy bubbling below the calm exterior and you know that he’ll need to release that tension. Jongin opens your door, holding your hand as you get inside the car before rounding the car to drive you home; you don’t speak and Jongin refuses to break the silence between you. He cannot tell you what to do, that you cannot go because he isn’t meant to love you, he’s not meant to know how sweet you taste on his tongue or how the sounds you make are like music written by the heavens.

You don’t want to go, preferring to be near Jongin, with Jongin; locked away for the weekend, somewhere no one can find you and pretending that reality isn’t behind that closed door. You sigh, placing a hand on his thigh and feeling him relax a little at your touch. “You know I don’t want this,” you whisper, the sadness tugging at each word because the inevitable seems to be creeping up on you. “If I could, you know it would only be you.”

“I know,” there’s a hint of pain in his tone. “We have to be careful; he’s not as easily deceived as the others so we cannot be caught because we know what will happen if we are.” You frown, knowing too well the reality of the situation you’re in.

Jongin would be fired and your future in Korea would end because you cannot be involved with someone like him, there’s no benefit to the relationship other than you being happy. Your father would argue that point though, try and find ways to tell you that you could love another or how a relationship with your bodyguard is doomed from the beginning; he would do whatever to justify destroying something that made you feel alive.

You don’t need to feel alive though, you just have to live the life he has planned for you.

You wake up with a sleepy smile as you feel Jongin’s lips gently move down the nape of your neck, arms snaking around your waist as he pulls you in closer and the warmth of him envelopes you in the cool chill of the moonlight. Stars twinkle above you as your eyes flutter open and you roll around his embrace, entwining your legs as you connect your lips and revel in the slow exploration of his tongue and mouth. Moans are lost with the light breeze and you thank whoever is listening that you’ve got this moment with Jongin.

Things have been more difficult over the past few months, dates with Kim Wonsik have been happening frequently while Jongin has to observe and wait. His fingers twitching to run along your skin and erase the touch of the other man, looks of longing and lingering touches becoming the only way either can communicate your love while you play the role you need to play to throw suspicion off your relationship.

This includes the increased publicity you’ve gained when the news got wind that you and Wonsik were officially dating. You are used to the paparazzi following you around but it’s increased ten-fold and Jongin’s had to take a cautionary step back to keep you safe.

That’s why you’re here, out of town and hidden away from the world, wrapped in each other while the night keeps you secret. He’s grown increasingly worried about your safety, from paparazzi to people approaching you on the street to the death threats and emails you’ve been beginning to get on a weekly basis – there’s something that doesn’t sit right in Jongin’s gut but he has no proof that there’s something foul at play.

Jongin whisked you away, needing a weekend with you out of the eyes that seem to always be watching and you needed him; needing to wash away the stress and exhaustion that has come to sit in your soul as the weeks turn into months. You feel like you’re drowning, drowning in the responsibilities you have and Jongin is the only breath of fresh air you have.

Everywhere you turn, everywhere you look, it feels that eyes are now constantly on you apart from when you’re in your office or at home. You know that the slightest mistake with Jongin can tear this fantasy apart and you aren’t wanting to let him go – so you’ve been working out how to have it all.

But life isn’t about having it all, you cannot have your cake and eat it too because then where would the fun be in that. No, each step that you carefully take is being counteracted and those eyes that watch you so carefully are plotting and planning because even though you can fool the world, you can’t fool him.

You can’t begin to comprehend the danger that could potentially becoming just from the announcement, how life could throw a curve ball in your direction that you swing and miss; how could you imagine that? That the happiness that you’ve blissfully living in for the last year or so would be abruptly shattered with the sound of gun fire.

You covered your head, squeezing your eyes shut and hiding underneath your desk, imagines of Jongin’s smile flashing before your eyes; you can hear Jongin’s deep voice calling security on his mic piece as the footsteps rapidly approach and the doors are thrown open. There’s a moment of complete silence, like the world had gone completely deaf and you don’t see it, you don’t see the last, pained look Jongin throws back at you – the woman he swore he would protect, no matter the cost.

The police were on their way, security rushing in on your office and back up on its way; Jongin keeps his gun raised, pointing at the leader of three men who barged into your office to follow up on a threat you had received that week prior. There are no words that he could say to say goodbye, knowing that even if security made it in time to stop them, he was the only thing currently standing in the way of their prize.

You scream, hearing the gunshot and you can feel your heart breaking. You didn’t need to look and see, you didn’t need to see to know what your heart already confirms; you keep screaming, collapsing on the ground completely as the yelling from the hallway becomes fuzzy and your head begins to spin. Memories play in the darkness of your mind as the first tears break through, the way Jongin’s eyes sparkled when you told him you loved him, how his lips would lift in a dazzling smile when he saw you every morning and how only a few days ago, you were bathed in the moonlight together.

Deluding yourselves that this was ever going to have a happy ending.

Your name is called, arms pick you up as you fight whoever has grabbed you. You don’t open your eyes, scared to see the scene that surrounds you and destroy the scene that plays in your mind but his voice coaxes you. Wonsik stands before you, arms gripping your biceps as you push against his chest before you grow too weak to fight.

“It’s okay,” he whispers, tugging you in for a hug as you let the pain spread throughout your body. “They’re dead, the rest of them have been arrested and they’ll find out who did this.” You don’t hear his attempt at comforting you because you know that you’ll have to face the one body you can’t bear to see, lying a few metres away.

“Jo-Jong-” you can’t say his name, knowing that muttering will break your heart but you need to see, even if you don’t want to know the truth – your heart knows what you want to deny. Jongin would be by your side if he was okay, holding you as you cried but he’s not, he’s not and he won’t ever do so again.

Wonsik watches from where he stands as you slowly walk towards Jongin’s body, watches as you collapse next to him and bury your head in his chest, not caring about the way your skin becomes tainted by Jongin’s blood. You look down at him, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling and you can’t hold back the tears as you close them, running a hand through his matted hair as you whisper how sorry you are. You love him, you’re sorry you couldn’t prove that in the way he wanted and now you’ll never get the chance to.

As you break inside, holding onto Jongin one last time, Wonsik stands behind you, the smallest of emotion showing in his eyes as he realises that he finally gets what he wants. No one is standing in the way of you now, he’s got you and there’s nothing Jongin can do to keep you from him.

He’s won.

[aerisosweet]

HE LOOKS AMAZING

[optimizche]

Bodyguard  (Park Chanyeol x Reader smut )

Author's note: Kindly leave your feedback! If you'd like me to expand this series with other EXO members or maybe a multi-chapter with PCY, lemme know! ❤

You're bored already.

Bored out of your mind.

This is yet another fundraiser gala, one of the countless such functions you have attended. It is all so predictable. Men dressed in custom made tuxedos, women dressed in elaborate ensembles from the latest fashion week collections.

You were bored of it all. The expensive watches, the even more expensive jewellery.

You walked in eight inch Louboutins that felt like razor blades affixed to your heels, dressed in a custom-made Versace gown. The black silk clung to your body like second skin, emphasizing every single curve and dip of your body. Your hair had been coiffed up into a chignon, done by a celebrity hairstylist whose name you had already forgotten.

A flute of champagne in hand, you walked through the crowds, wanting to escape.

Your world was perfect and polished and embellished and organized. Your whole life had been meticulously planned out for you, served to you on a silver platter. But you didn't want any of it.

You didn't want to inherit your father's multi-billion dollar empire. You didn't want to spend the rest of your life attending such tedious, cumbersome events, raising money for this disease or that social cause.

You wanted to write. You wanted to be free. You wanted the world to know of your thoughts. You wanted to express yourself. You wanted to escape. You wanted to run away. You wanted-

The touch of his hand upon your wrist jolted you back to reality. Just the slightest brush of his skin against yours felt like a bolt of lightning.

His voice was a whisper against your ear. "Are you feeling alright, Miss?"

Miss. It was all part of the charade, because your parents were nearby, your mother watching you closely even as she chatted with some Senator's wife.

You had drunk plenty tonight, your mind buzzing from the expensive booze you had downed listlessly. But it didn't slip past you that he was offering you an out. An escape.

With a quick squeeze of his hand you silently told him that you understood. He gently took the half-empty flute of champagne away from your hand as you made your way to your parents, a hint of a smile playing on his full lips.

"Mother," you adopted your best 'I'm not feeling well' voice as you approached your parents. "May I be excused? I'm feeling unwell."

Your mother looked at you with suspicion in her eyes, but didn't say anything when your father excused you from the party, allowing you to leave.

"Take her home, will you, Chanyeol?" your father addressed him, your bodyguard.

"Of course, sir," he replied, the picture of courtesy.

You placed a hand upon his arm, feeling the sinewy muscle beneath the fabric of his suit, letting him guide you away from the gala. To freedom.

"Thank you," you murmur quietly as you make your way to your limo, the November night air chilling your exposed skin as your heels click against the pavement.

"Don't thank me just yet," he says, his voice deep and velvety. Dripping with seduction.

The raw desire dancing in his dark eyes tells you exactly how this night is going to go...

In the car, the partition is drawn up, giving you the privacy you need while the driver takes you home.

It takes you every ounce of your restraint not to make a sound, even when you are in Chanyeol's arms: his lips at your neck, his hand between your legs, two fingers inside you. Knuckle deep.

You pressed your lips to his neck in order to stifle your moans, your manicured fingers clutching at his broad shoulders.

"You've gotta stay quiet for me, princess," he breathed against the shell of your ear. "Can you imagine the scandal if someone found out?"

You nod against him, biting down on your lip, hips grinding down into his hand, letting him touch you.

It felt incredible, the expert curl of his fingers within you, the tips of his digits just barely stroking that spot inside you, making you whimper. Making you wetter with every passing second.

He was teasing you just right, building up the pleasure and the anticipation. It was an unspoken promise...

I'm going to fuck you until you forget your own name.

And you wanted it. More than anything.

You wanted to forget.

The moment you were ensconced in the privacy of your bedroom, Chanyeol was upon you.

Wild and untamed.

Between frenzied kisses, he ripped away your dress, revealing the lace thong you wore underneath it.

"Didn't wear a bra, huh?" he asked, reaching out to undo your hair from its updo, freeing your locks.

"This is how I like you," he spoke, his voice sending shivers down your spine, making your toes curl within those infernal heels you were wearing.

He seemed to read your mind. "Keep the heels on, darling," he said, smirking as he pulled down your panties, shoving them into his pocket. A souvenir.

Pushing you down on your bed, he raised your legs and hooked them over his broad shoulders. You noticed that he was still fully dressed and grinned. It was his favourite way of fucking you. Him fully clothed while you were completely naked.

You watched him unbuckle his pants with one hand, his other hand reaching into his pocket for a condom.

"No, baby," you moaned, mind already gone because of the alcohol. And your lust for him. "Fuck me raw. No condom."

He groaned upon hearing your request.

"I want to feel you," you cooed. "All of you."

And when he dove into you, you were lost. He glided in so easily, you were so wet and ready for him.

"Fuck, princess..."

He hadn't drunk a single drop of booze at the gala, but as he fucked into you in quick, precise thrusts, he was intoxicated. Groaning and grunting. Sweat beading on his brow.

"Such a tight little cunt," he spoke, biting down on his lip. "You take my cock so well."

You threw your head back against your bed, crying out in ecstasy. This is what made you feel alive. He made you feel alive.

He took your breath away. He set your heart racing. He made you mindless with pleasure. He set your soul on fire.

Your first orgasm came upon you quickly, and he clapped a hand over your mouth to muffle your moans.

When you came to, he was still hard as a rock, throbbing within you, your walls fluttering around his girth.

Pulling out of you, he flipped you over onto your front.

Rough hands grasped at your hips and he pulled you up, ass in the air.

Using whatever energy you had left in you, you raised your head, turning back to look at him.

Chanyeol cupped your ass in his palms, parting your cheeks before leaning close. He spat, sending a trickle of his saliva down between your cheeks, a hand coming between your legs to massage it into your swollen folds.

"Mmmm..." you moaned. "Yes. Dirty me up like that..."

He chuckled.

After all these months of these secret trysts,  Chanyeol had learned your body. He knew exactly what you wanted, how you wanted it.

Lining his cock with your cunt, he rubbed the tip against your folds. "Daddy's little girl is such a slut for me, huh?"

You tossed your hair over your shoulder to look him in the eye. "You're my Daddy now..."

He sank back into you, his fingers digging into your hips and you welcomed him with a shuddering gasp of his name, eyes falling shut.

Chanyeol knew exactly how to unravel you, how to bring you apart. Piece by piece. By now, he knew your body like the back of his hand. He knew you like you were an extension of himself.

One strong arm came to wrap around your waist, pulling you closer, your back flush against his clothed chest, your sweat and slick staining his suit.

"You're mine, princess," he groaned into your ear, his free hand hefting your hair into a makeshift ponytail around his wrist, tugging your head back.

He was fucking you like you belonged to him.

Like he owned you.

"Yes," you moaned, biting your bottom lip. "I'm yours. I'm yours. I'm all yours..."

You knew you weren't going to last long under the heat of his passion. And neither was he, considering how he was panting and cursing under his breath, his mouth brushing against the corner of yours, your cheek against his.

Reaching back, you curled your hand into his hair. "Come inside me, Chanyeollie. I want you to fill me up."

"Fuck, babygirl..."

"I'm yours, baby," you cooed. "All yours. Just come inside me. I want to feel you. I-"

You could never finished your sentence as your orgasm claimed you suddenly, your words dissolving into a loud moan.

The steady clenching of your cunt around his cock only spurred on his own release and granting you your wish, he came inside you. Long, hot spills of his seed filled you up. Just like you'd wanted it.

"Such a spoilt little girl," he groaned, grasping your chin and turning your face to his. "Always gets what she wants..."

You chuckled, feeling truly happy and content, as you kissed him deeply.

He always made you happy.

[childofthenight2035]

Protect You (Part 3) Final

A/N: its literally been forever, this is NOT my best work, im sorry this is so damn long i aint ever gonna finish this am i featuring everybody and Ji Chang Wook

Pairing: Lee Taeyong x gn!Reader, Ji ChangWook x gn!Reader, Jung Jaehyun x gn!Reader

Summary/Prompt: Your new bodyguard doesn’t seen the friendly type.

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Bodyguard!AU

Word Count: 9.9k

Warnings: None?

Links to the other parts can be found in my masterlist!

-

               “You have to be kidding me.” I vaguely heard Kai’s voice in my room. “Hyung, how could you let this happen?” Firm footsteps. A strong hand wrenched the bottle out of my grip. I whined, but let it go. Even in my dazed state, I knew it was too much.

               Chanyeol gave a non-committal grunt. “What was I going to do? Stop it?” I fell back against the sofa from where I sat on the floor, fitting myself between Yeol’s legs. His broad hands stroked my hair soothingly and I leaned into his touch, smiling giddily. “What a happy baby.” Kai groaned. “Yah, what of Chang Wook? The asshole.”

               “You can’t blame him.” Kai let out a deep sigh. “His career was on the line.”

               “But still.”

               “He’s gone, anyway. Packed his bags and left.”

               “You’re kidding.”

               “They must have settled it that way. Let’s not interfere in it.”

               Chanyeol made a noise of outrage. “Not interfere? If I could get my hands on that—“

               “There’s something else, hyung. Something possibly worse.”

               There was a pause. “What could be worse?”

               “Someone joined the dance department, and I think…”

               I was so exhausted. I fell asleep.

 -

                 Wendy’s constant presence was slowly starting to drive me insane. I had not a single moment to myself. It was irritating, especially concerning the fact that I wasn’t that close to Wendy.

               “Do you really have nothing to do?” I asked, albeit a little harshly. Wendy pouted.

               “Wow, do you really not like having me around?”

               I slumped. “It’s not that, just….I feel like you’re tailing me because Yeol put you up to it. I mean, will anyone let me mope in peace?”

               “Honestly? No,” she replied. “Irene is out of town and Seulgi is completely hooked on that new kid in the choreo department.”

               Something rang a bell. “Ohh, yeah, I think the boys mentioned that…” I tugged at my hair. “And? What did Seulgi say? Is the kid any good?”

               “I wish he wasn’t.” Wendy shook her head. “She hasn’t spoken of anything but how great he is at everything.”

               I laughed. “Seems like someone has a crush?”

               Wendy pursed her lips. “God, I hope not. I won’t be able to live with her.” She suddenly stopped and gripped my arm. “And you know what she’s saying? He’s so good, she’s taking him with us to New York!”

               “Tomorrow, isn’t it?” I shivered. “I keep forgetting it’s so close. I’m excited.”

               “Me too.” She bounced on her heels. “I’ve never been to New York.”

               “Hyunwoo’s gonna be there,” I said, heart sinking a little as I remembered why Hyunwoo would be there. “Reinstated as long as I’m there.”

               “Oh. That’s good, isn’t it?”

               “It must be such an inconvenience, I mean, he must have other things to do.”

               “He might not.” Wendy was quick to reassure me. “Don’t think about it too much.” She glanced at her watch. “We have a department meeting now. You want to come?”

               I shook my head. “What would I possibly do?”

               “Just sit there and watch. Come on. It’s not like you have anything better to do.”

 .

               I slipped into the room behind Wendy and immediately spotted Chanyeol, standing near the back and leaning against the wall. I slid into the shadows behind him.

               “Yah, what are you doing here?” He whispered. I smiled angelically in response.

               “Hey,” Wendy hissed, tapping my shoulder. “I think that’s the new guy.” I turned my head in the direction she was pointing until I caught a shock of red hair near the front of the room.

               “Damn,” I whispered back. “Sure he’s not an idol or something?” She only giggled. My eyes remained trained on the back of the newbie’s head, admiring his spunk. I caught a glimpse of Seulgi, who was seated next to him, as she turned to talk to him. “Seulgi looks whipped,” I commented.

               “Can you both shut up?” Chanyeol snapped, unusually tense. I narrowed my eyes at him, but obeyed. I slunk back into the shadows.

               “I’ll wait outside, then,” I told Wendy, my voice low. She nodded and let me go, only after promising that I had to wait for them. I crept along the walls and let myself out the door.

  -

                 I dragged my toes aimlessly over the floor, following the cracks that the tiles made—ordinary large grey tiles that bored me. I checked my watch. Why weren’t they coming out yet? Were department meetings such a big deal? I’d never known. It had been well over an hour already and who knew whether it would take longer? I didn’t understand all their talk about tech and time schedules and budgets. Channie seemed pretty nervous. Was the music department behind on any deadline? Wait—was it because he was taking care of me for the past few days? Was he going to face the music today? Is this all my fault? Yes, a voice in my head answered my question. Of course this is all your fault.

               The door creaked open and I shifted aside for the throng of people to pass, greeting the ones I recognized but keeping one eye out for Wendy or Chanyeol. After the rush had died down, the door opened again to emit two people—Seulgi and the new kid. My eyes immediately darted to his hair. He nodded at Seulgi and the two split ways, the new guy taking the corridor that passed me. And that’s when I saw his face.

               My mouth fell open. I stood there speechless as he walked past without even giving a hint that he knew I was standing there.

               “Taeyong?” I breathed out, loud enough for him to hear. No response. He continued walking. “Yah, Lee Taeyong!” I left my post by the door and ran after him. He seemed to not pay attention. I seized the cuff of his shirt and tugged hard, so that he was forced to stop. I pulled and he swung reluctantly around to face me. “Yah, Taeyong-ah,” I said in numb disbelief that soon changed to anger. “Yah, how could you do that? Resign without telling me and then disappear? And then show up three days later as a choreographer? What do you think you’re doing?”

               His face soured and he yanked his arm back. “Please leave me alone. Don’t talk to me.” Swivelling on his heels, he strolled away, his footsteps echoing in the empty corridor.

 -

                 “Can you believe that?” I burst out in Chanyeol’s studio. “Lee Taeyong—my bodyguard—after all we’ve been through—honestly, how dare he? And he’s telling me to leave him alone? Like what the hell? Not to talk to him? What is he playing at?”

               I paced the studio, not seeing Wendy flinch, nor Chanyeol glaring at her.

               “Okay, but listen, it’s not that I’m upset that he resigned or anything,” I continued, not caring whether they were listening or not. “I mean, he liked dancing, so yeah, let him dance again, that’s a great thing, but why leave without telling me and now why tell me to stay away? I mean, what did I do?”

               “Maybe he was embarrassed that he was going to take dancing again,” Wendy suggested. I caught Yeol’s glare but didn’t make anything of it.

               “How? I’m the one that told him to start dancing again and that we’d all support him,” I argued. “That doesn’t explain why he’s mad at me now.”

               “I’m sure he has his reasons,” Chanyeol interjected. “Let’s not push it. You—“ he pointed at me, “—should be focusing on your dialogues. We’re leaving tomorrow and don’t think Sunho’s going to give you much time to learn them once we’re there.”

               “Ooh, responsible Yeol,” I teased. “It’s not a bad look for you.”

               “I’m serious, Y/N.”

               “The flight. I’ll learn them on the flight.” He sighed and turned to his computer. “Oh no,” I said, suddenly remembering what Wendy told me. “Taeyong’s coming, isn’t he?”

               “Just stay away from him, yeah?” I heard Chanyeol say. “Nothing good is going to come out of you provoking him. So use your brain for once.”

               “For once?” I stuck my tongue out at the back of his head. “I use my brain all the time.”

               “And let me remind you of one thing,” he turned right around. “In the light of the media, you’re still in a relationship with Kai, so don’t go around making a bad rep. Hyuk’s going to have a heart attack if you do.”

               “I don’t want to see his fat face,” I snapped. “Let him go to hell.” Wendy raised her eyebrows. I kind of felt sorry for her, having to witness all my arguments with Chan.

               “Well, at least Hyunwoo’s going to be there, yeah?” she said cheerily. “He must be glad to see you. It’s been a while.”

               Before I could respond, Chan cut in. “Have you finished packing?”

               “Not everything.”

               “Go finish. Now.” I stood up, scared of his tone, bowed to both of them deeper than I normally did and let myself out the door.

  -

                  I pressed my fingertips to the thick glass of the airplane windows, gazing down at the scene below us. It was just like in the movies—tall skyscrapers breaking through the clouds as the flight descended.

               “New York.” Chanyeol said quietly beside me. “Worth the wait, huh?”

               “You bet.” I peeked over the seat ahead of me and saw Wendy with her nose pressed against the glass, excitement written all over her face. I couldn’t help but giggle. Despite having been abroad for most of her studies, she had apparently never actually been to New York.

               I could only hope the visit turned out as good as I hoped.

 .

               “Hyunwoo!” I squealed as soon as I saw him waiting for us outside the airport. I was about to make a dash for him, but Chanyeol seized my arm and pulled me close to him, looking furtively both ways.

               “Don’t make a scene, for heaven’s sake,” he hissed. I pouted but obeyed.

               The first thing I got from Hyunwoo was a hard knuckle to my head. And then a hug.

               “I didn’t think I would be seeing you so soon,” he remarked. “There goes my peace and quiet for the next couple months.”

               I punched him—which I’m sure he didn’t even feel—and looped my arm into his. “I’m sorry you had to drop everything—“ A flash of red passed me. I raised my voice slightly. “—for me. It was all because of some asshole who resigned without saying anything—“ A sharp smack to the back of my head shut me up. Channie. Why can’t you be on my side for this? Jeez.

               “I’m sure he had a reason,” Hyunwoo said sensibly. I knew that was obviously true, but my irritation wouldn’t stay down for long.

               “Forget it. How’s Minhyuk?” I asked, shifting the topic back to him.

               “He’s doing good. He’s a teacher at a preschool now, did you know?”

               “Really? That’s great. He’s good with kids.”

               “He is.” I could hear the fondness in his voice and my heart suddenly ached.

  -

                 The streets were packed. However hard I looked, I could hardly see enough space for a cat to breathe. The hotel corridor had full length windows at the end and I was pressed up against them, peering down at the road. “Is New York always so busy?” I wondered aloud.

               “Sure is.”

               I jumped, my shoes making an embarrassing squeaking noise against the tiles. Swivelling around, I came face-to-face with a cheerful face. Cheerful? Well, that too. I meant to say gorgeous. Because he is. “Oh. Um. Hi.”

               His face broke out in an excited grin. “Hi. I’m Jaehyun. I think we’ve…um…corresponded?”

               Odd way to say that we talked on the phone, but okay. “Yeah, I remember. Nice to finally meet you.”

               We shook hands.

               “You got the role of the boyfriend, right?” I confirmed, lifting myself off the window and gesturing him to follow me downstairs to where I would get some food in my stomach.

               “Yeah, I did!” He was bouncing on his heels very slightly, but enough for me to notice.

               I chuckled. “You seem really eager.”

               He abruptly stopped and let out a nervous laugh. “Well, yeah, I guess. I’m a really big fan of you. You’re such a great actor. You’re like my idol.”

               “Thank you,” I replied graciously. “I’m looking forward to seeing you be even better. No pressure, though.”

               “I’ll try my best!” He pressed the button for the elevator and held it open for me. Once we were inside, he cleared his throat. “Um, do you know where Taeyong is? He told me he was coming, too.”

               My expression soured as soon as I heard his name. “No, I don’t know. And I certainly don’t care where he is, either.”

               “Whoa. I’m sorry. Is…is something wrong?” Jaehyun looked genuinely confused, poor thing. “I thought he was your bodyguard?”

               “Exactly. He was.” The elevator pinged and the doors opened. “You can ask him why yourself.” I stalked out, mood ruined, leaving Jaehyun absolutely scared of my sudden temper.

 .

               Stupid Taeyong. Stupid Taeyong with his stupid red hair and his stupid choreo. Who does he think he is? How dare he say that to me? How dare he tell me to leave him alone when I’m the one who told him that it was okay to go dance again? Him and his stupid dance moves, looking like a tomato. That’s what I’m going to call him. Tomatohead. Stupid tomatohead with his —

               “Couldn’t you just talk to him?” Hyunwoo suggested, evidently tired of me staring at Taeyong with daggers in my eyes every time I saw him. I shook my head.

               “He doesn’t want to talk to me, so what am I supposed to do?” I slumped back in my chair. “It’s like I did something to him. He’s acting perfectly fine around everyone else.”

               Always the voice of reason, Hyunwoo spoke gently: “Maybe you did do something.”

               “I swear I didn’t!” I cried out for the umpteenth time in a week.

               “Did you say anything to him the day before he resigned?”

               “I was at a party,” I stressed yet again. “He wasn’t in a mile radius of where I was. And we were on good terms before it.”

               Hyunwoo only sighed and sat back, gazing at me disappointedly. I hated that look. Why do I feel so guilty if I didn’t do anything?

  -

               Tax fraud. That’s what my parents said the authorities called it. I didn’t understand. Hadn’t my parents been paying their taxes? Wasn’t that what they were working so hard for? I didn’t know why they would be accused of it, nor did I give it much importance until I heard them tell me one word—deportation. That meant being forced out of the country. That meant leaving. Going back to the town my parents grew up in. No, they told me, not a town. A village. A village on the river. A village on the border, on the brink of war.

No, I told them, I won’t go. There has to be a way to fix this problem. Tax issues aren’t rare. People have survived those without getting kicked out. No, I said, I won’t let us go. Falling into the middle of war? It’s not safe. Is this your attempt at being patriotic? Aren’t you worried at all?

Nonsense, they told me, this is something we’ve been meaning to do anyway. You need to know about your own culture instead of rotting in this foreign land. We’re going, they said, we don’t have the ability to fight the government. You’re thinking only of yourself. Our people have always made peace. There won’t be a war, you’ll see.

None of my friends understood. They were sad that I would leave, but I was devastated. They were losing one person, one replaceable face in the crowd. I was losing everything and everyone I had ever known. Not even my boyfriend heard what I was trying to tell him.

“You’re going back?” he asked me, his voice a hushed whisper. “You’re not serious?”

I nodded, eyes teary. “That’s what they’re telling me.”

He shook his head disbelievingly. “You’re so lucky.”

My mouth fell open. “You’re calling me lucky? Have you gone insane?”

“You wouldn’t understand!” he exclaimed. “All those things my father tells us, regretting that he brought us here and spoiled us…but he’s never had the courage to actually pack up and leave. Ah, the stories he tells!” He had a wistful look on his face. “Sometimes they make me wish I was there.”

I swallowed my grief down, but tears spilled over anyway. “I can’t believe you would say that. You’re just like everyone else. Is that all I am?”

“Hey, darling, no, don’t cry.” He gently wiped away the droplets running down. “I know. But don’t you see how great this is? This adventure you’re going to be part of?” I seized his shirt and fisted the material in my hands.

               “No! Why can’t you understand?” I begged, tear tracks staining my cheeks. “Don’t you care about me? About…” Us, I wanted to say. Don’t you love me? There were so many things I wanted to tell him, so much I wanted to ask, so many things I wanted to yell out at him, in his face, into the void. But we were in the neighbourhood, other people already looking around to see what the commotion was.

               “Darling, I do,” he said, glancing around quickly, his way of telling me that I was being too loud, too open about what was happening between us, too much to harm his image. “I do care about you. But you know there’s nothing I can do about it. You know I’m barely scraping through as it is.”

               I wrung my hands. “But—“

               “Listen, I don’t know why or how your family got yourselves involved in this—this tax fraud? I don’t know. But I don’t have even two dollars to lend you, sweetheart, you know that. I have no connections. I can’t afford a lawyer.” He sighed, running his hands through his hair.

               My mouth parted. “I’m not even asking you for mon—“

               “Darling. Please. I understand. You’re worried, you’re upset, this is unfair, I know.” He gripped my shoulders. “Your parents aren’t half as worried, though, are they?” I reluctantly shook my head. “They know what’s best for you. And it’s not forever. You’ll come back someday. Or I’ll finally pick myself up and move there. But this is such a great opportunity for you. Don’t let it go. Listen to them. I’ll write to you. I promise.”

               The walk home was depressing. I realized that I had no one to lean on. No one to trust. I would fight this on my own.

  -

               “Good work, today, everyone! Pack up!” Sunho-ssi’s shout was balm to my poor ears. I collapsed onto a chair as soon as I walked out of sight of the cameras. Jaehyun fell into the next one soon after.

               “You’re really good, you know?” I remarked. He turned red despite how flushed his face already was.

               “Look who’s talking. You cry so convincingly. I wanted to break character and hug you so badly,” he replied, the tips of his ears turning adorably pink as he finished the sentence.

               “Give me a hug now then, I could use it.” I stretched my arms out toward him and he hesitantly embraced me. I rubbed his back soothingly. “You’re comfortable. I like you.” Ignoring the spluttering I heard by my ear, I murmured, “Let’s go get something to eat, I’m starved.”

               “Wait, where’s Hyunwoo?” Jaehyun asked, noticing that the big guy wasn’t anywhere near us. I shrugged, not intending to make a scene out of it. To be honest, I was sort of glad that I wasn’t restricting him. I wanted him to be happy. I was the one who urged him to let go of the job and move to New York. I wanted him to be living on his terms for once and I felt so guilty for making him have to stick by my side again.

               “It’s okay, he might have gone home for a while.” I nudged him in the ribs. “He must have trusted you enough.” Laughing at the look on his face, I stood up, taking his hand and pulled him over to the vehicles with the rest of the crew.

               Unfortunately, the only car that had vacant seats was Seulgi’s. I assumed they had come to set to ask for input or to analyse the scene. I wasn’t going to ask what they did when they were working. I really didn’t want to share with those two, but Jaehyun saw his favourite hyung and dragged me along at once.

               Seulgi smiled at me and moved to the side, looking at Mr. Tomatohead pleadingly, who rolled his eyes and vaulted into the cramped backseat. Jae and I slid into the middle, squeezing me in between. I was very much aware that there was a certain man breathing down my neck, but I tried not to think about it. I was also very much aware that Jaehyun was still holding my hand.

               “Hey hyung!” Jaehyun said cheerfully, twisting around to face the tomato, surprisingly still not letting go of my hand. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that Seulgi’s gaze rested on our intertwined fingers and she smirked.

               “Hello, Jaehyun,” he replied dully, not using a nickname. Jaehyun’s face fell and he looked down at me, briefly. I winced at him apologetically and he turned back around in his seat, choosing instead to look out the window.

               “How’s the shooting going?” Seulgi asked politely (I knew her, but I didn’t know her like that), just to make some small talk to break the awkwardness on our side of the car.

               “It’s going well,” I answered, seizing the chance. “Jae’s such a great actor. He’s fun working with. I’m glad he got the part.”

               “Stop it,” Jaehyun interjected, his ears going red again. “I’m not that great.”

               I squeezed his fingers. “Yeah, you are.” He tugged at his collar, unbuttoning it. It was so funny to see how flustered he got when he was complimented. I laughed at him.

               I missed the look Seulgi gave the man seated behind me.

-

               Four weeks. Four weeks since we had arrived. Four weeks since I met Jaehyun and he decided to stick by my side all the time. Hyunwoo’s job was a lot easier, but he still hung around on the periphery most of the time.

               After Jae was brushed off in the car that day, he seemed distant towards Taeyong, though he claimed they had patched things up back in their room. I was upset that I’d gotten in between two best friends, but that guilt always dissipated when I remembered what a jerk Taeyong was being anyway. Needless to say, Yeol wasn’t that ecstatic that I’d temporarily awarded Jae with the best friend title. But Jae was just so…fun.

               High energy stinkball. That’s what he was. In the best way, of course. If you needed a jock, I had one ready for you. That’s what he was in the politest sense of the term. And I loved it. I felt nothing for him in the romance department. Not at all. It wasn’t just because he had idol-zoned me as soon as he met me, but his mannerisms and his energy gave me the impression that I was playing with some puppy, that I was taking care of a kid. I felt that instinctively, like he was someone to be mothered, to be adopted. So that’s what I did.

I thought about it, so many times. I stayed awake some nights thinking about what Jaehyun meant to me and what I wanted from him, if I even wanted anything at all. I wasn’t about to jump headfirst into a relationship, not after what happened not too long ago. I wasn’t ready, at least not by my own standards. My biggest problem was that I had no clue what Jaehyun thought of me. But I realized what I thought of him, one clear night on the roof. People say that you know the exact moment you realize you’re in love with someone, but I never knew that I would be able to pinpoint that moment I realize I’m not in love.

I had knocked on Jaehyun’s door in the dead of night, after calling him and telling him to get dressed and come out. He obeyed, rubbing his eyes blearily and yawning.

“What is it?” he pouted. “It’s one in the morning. Why aren’t you asleep?”

I frowned. I thought he would have been more excited at the idea of a midnight escapade. “Follow me. I want to show you something.” I led him to the elevators and we rode until the top floor. I pulled his whining self, up a set of stairs and through a door that opened onto the roof.

He shivered as the cool air hit him. “What are we doing up here?”

I spread out a blanket I had nicked from Yeol’s room. “Shooting stars.”

“Huh?”

I gestured for him to lay down. Making myself comfortable, I pointed up at the night sky. “If we wait enough, we’ll probably see a shooting star.”

“Why—“ he ground his teeth and broke off. “Okay.”

I winced. I knew he was tired and I should feel guilty about it, but I wanted him to be with me to look for shooting stars. I didn’t speak for a while, biting my lip. I listened to my own breathing and his beside me. It was relaxing, in a way. The days were hot and humid but the nights were absolutely wonderful. Being on the roof of such a high building made me  feel that much closer to the moon. I watched the twinkling of the little dots in the sky, remembering the reasons for it that I learned in grade school. The flashing red light from a plane moved across my field of vision. I wondered for a moment where it was going. It might have been hours, or minutes. I saw a streak of light flash by.

“There!” I exclaimed, lifting myself up on my elbow and pointing. “Did you see that?” Silence. I looked over at Jaehyun with a brilliant smile on my face. He was sleeping peacefully, unaware of anything that had just happened. I sighed.

The thought came out of nowhere. I like him as just a friend. He’s just like Chanyeol. And then I was speechless at my own conclusion. I’m not in love with him. He was a good person to kill some time with, not to share emotion with. Someone I was in love with…I’d want to share beauty with them, appreciate aesthetic with them.

And then I remembered a night journey, months ago, wind whipping through my hair, a mask over my face and a blue glow from behind trees. I remembered a heartfelt talk, the whispers and expressive eyes.

And then I thought, Taeyong is asleep in the same room I pulled Jaehyun out from. I brought the wrong person with me.

And then, I wish Taeyong didn’t hate me. I‘m going to apologize for whatever I did, even if I don’t know what it is.

It was relatively easy, to shake Jae awake, forgive him for sleeping over his ‘sorry’s, and to haul his drowsy self downstairs to his room. What wasn’t easy was to be greeted by Taeyong’s sour face opening the door, his muttering as he let me in to dump Jae on his bed and the feeling of his eyes on me as I reluctantly walked towards the door, his hand already on the knob, ready to lock me out.

“Taeyong.” His name left my tongue in breathless whisper that made him tense up. I looked at him, desperate. “Please don’t be like this.”

“You should leave.” He wasn’t having it.

“Taeyong…ssi. I’m sorry.” I noticed how his expression changed at my apology. “I’ve clearly done something to hurt you. And I’m sorry, but I don’t know what it is. I don’t remember. Whatever it is, I’m so sorry. This—whatever is going on between us, I can’t take it anymore. I’m sorry.”

His shoulders slumped as if he had been carrying the weight of the world on them and finally set it down somewhere. “You don’t remember.” It wasn’t a question. It seemed to be addressed to himself, as if he had just realized something. “Of course you don’t remember. I thought—“ he broke off, shaking his head. “It doesn’t matter. You should leave.”

“Taeyong—“

“I’m sorry, too, Y/N. But you need to go and sleep. Please. It’s late. We can talk…in the morning.” He bowed his head and, recognizing defeat, I walked out of the room. I was so caught up with the thoughts in my own head and my bitter disappointment that it didn’t register that their door closed only after I closed mine.

 -

 After the next day’s shoot, I sat in a chair in the hotel lobby with Seulgi, waiting for Jaehyun to come inside. I hadn’t seen Taeyong all day.

“You’re waiting for Wendy to come down, I guess?” I asked her. She nodded.

“Yeah. She wanted to go see the Empire State Building and I said I’d go with her.” She shook back her hair. I envied how she maintained it so well, but I didn’t dare say that out loud.

“You don’t know where…Taeyong is…do you?” I tried to sound as casual as possible, as if I hadn’t avoided him for the last month. I must have missed her change in tone, but I caught her little smile. My eyebrows creased, alarms going off in my head.

“I haven’t seen him. We don’t have practice today.”

“Ah. Thanks anyway.” I directed my gaze outside the full length glass windows, thinking about her change in mannerisms. Does Seulgi like Taeyong? Wendy did say she wouldn’t stop talking about him. My eyes fell on Jaehyun and I almost stood up to wave at him, but then I saw Hyunwoo pulling him aside and whispering to him. That was something I had never seen. Since when were they so close? Hyunwoo strode indoors to the elevators without sparing me a glance. Oh, he meant business.

The sofa dipped as Jae plopped down next to me, yawning.

“Why does Hyunwoo look like he’s going to kick someone’s ass?”

He shrugged. “Shownu hyung? I dunno. He told me to keep you here and not let you come upstairs until he calls you.”

“Why? What the hell. Also, wait, Shownu? Only Minhyuk and his other friends call him that. How…?”

“I’m just a friendly guy. Seulgi, right?” Jaehyun reached around me to shake her hand. “Jaehyun. Taeyong’s told me quite a lot about you. He says your dancing is pretty impressive.” He wiggled his eyebrows. I stared at him in disgust.

She blushed. “He’s exaggerating. I’m not that good. Have you seen him dance?”

I tuned them out. I absolutely did not need to hear about this. Also, is this Jaehyun when he flirts? He’s doing pretty well. I’ve never seen him like that. That means he doesn’t see me like that. Right? That’s a relief. I wouldn’t want to break his heart.

My phone buzzed. “”Hyunwoo’s calling.” I slid my finger over the answer button. “Hello?”

Two sentences. “Come to Chanyeol’s room. Don’t bring Jaehyun.” And then he hung up.

“What did he say?” He asked curiously.

I stood up, smoothening my shirt. “To go to Yeol’s room and not bring you.”

He looked momentarily offended but then stretched, eyes shifting to Seulgi. “Yeah, okay. That’s cool with me.”

Okay, he definitely wasn’t in love with me.

.

I knocked on Chanyeol’s door twice before I heard Hyunwoo’s voice say ‘just come in already’. Bewildered, I stepped inside and found Yeol and Wendy both standing there, heads bowed, looking positively guilty. Hyunwoo—Shownu?—standing there with his arms crossed only confused me more. I’ll be honest and I wasn’t proud of it, but the scene looked like Hyunwoo had just caught the two of them in the act. Against my will, my eyes slid to the bed. It wasn’t rumpled.

“…What’s going on?” I asked cautiously. “You two look like you murdered someone.”

There was no answer. Hyunwoo cleared his throat loudly and threateningly.

“Are you two going to speak up or should I?”

“Yeollie, what’s wrong?” I spoke gently. He flinched, still not looking up at me. My heart began to pound. Something was seriously wrong. Chanyeol was not responding to me. I shifted my focus. “Wendy? What’s the matter?”

She clenched her fists. “We…um. We know why Taeyong is mad at you.”

Silence.

Several thoughts ran through my mind. They found out why he’s mad at me? Is that why I didn’t see him at all today? Because he was telling them what happened? But why would he tell them? Did they interrogate him for it? Did they finally get tired of my moping? Is the reason so bad that they can’t even tell me? Have I done something terrible? Oh my gosh, what is it?

“You guys found out why he’s mad at me?”

Yeol opened his mouth the answer, but Hyunwoo cut him off. “No, they already knew why he’s mad at you. They’ve known this whole time.”

My mouth fell open. “What? What do you mean?” I turned to Chanyeol. “Yeol, he’s not serious, is he? You wouldn’t keep something like that from me…right?” His silence was answer enough.

“I—“ I tugged at my hair, frustrated. “But…why is he mad at me? What did I do?”

“You kissed him.”

 If I hadn’t seen Wendy’s lips move, I wouldn’t have believed those words. Actually, scratch that. I saw her lips move, and I still didn’t believe her.

“What do you mean, I kissed him?” I wasn’t sure I wanted to know any more.

She took a deep breath. “That night at the party. You got shitfaced and you…you called him on the phone and said you wanted him and so I grabbed it from you and asked him to come pick you up.” She fiddled nervously. “And when he came, you kissed him. Really...went for it.”

I stood there, speechless. No way that happened. She has to be joking. I wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t let me do that.

“Come on guys,” I said, voice lighthearted at first but faltering when I saw no change of expression. “That can’t be…true. Can it?” They hung their heads again. “How—How do you know?”

“I saw it,” Wendy mumbled.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“We didn’t want you to get hurt.”

“And Yeol? I thought you were as drunk as I was. If I didn’t remember, how did you?”

“I didn’t.” He swallowed hard. “Wendy told me.”

“When?” The word emerged as a harsh whisper, my anger and guilt slowly building.

“The next day.”

And then I exploded.

“So both of you knew about it? This is what you’ve been talking about behind my back? You really had the nerve to keep this from me, I can’t believe you! You didn’t even have the decency to let me know what I did! Just because I don’t remember doesn’t mean he doesn’t either! I could have at least apologized to him even if I didn’t remember! Why would you tell him to come pick me up? His sister was having a baby that night and he was with her, he told me that before he left and I promised him, I promised him that he wouldn’t have to come and then I went and ruined his life! Don’t you see how disturbed he was? Couldn’t you have stopped me? I don’t blame him for hating me, what have I done?! Of course he hates me, who wouldn’t? Don’t you have any idea what I’ve been going through every time I see him? How much negativity I’ve been carrying around? That doesn’t feel nice, you know! I can’t believe I would do something so stupid but at least you could have warned me…

I didn’t stay to listen to their apologies.

.

I hesitated for a moment before knocking on the door that I had stood outside that morning at one o’clock.

“Y/N! Hey, come in, what did Shownu hyung want? What did he say? He kick anybody’s ass? Ooh, was it Chanyeol—“

“Jae.” I cut off the steady stream of words that flowed from his mouth, my eyes trained on the lean red-haired man standing behind him, frozen. Damn, couldn’t the boy be quiet for once? “Could you give us a minute?”

Jaehyun looked from me to Taeyong. “Um. Okay?”

When the door clicked into place, he looked up at me. Again, I was mesmerized by him. I never paid so much attention, but his hair colour really brought out his sharp features.

“Taeyong-ssi,” I began carefully. “I’m very sorry.”

He smiled sadly, wearily. “For what? I’ve forgiven you.”

“No.” I jerked my thumb over my shoulder at the door. “They told me.”

“What?”

“They told me what happened at the party. They say I…kissed you. Is that true?”

His expression morphed into apprehension, quickly returning to his usual stoic face. “Yes.”

I buried my face in my hands. “God, Taeyong, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay. It was a mistake, you were drunk—“

“It’s not that inexcusable, Taeyong, please,” I begged. “You’ve only ever been professional and I went and destroyed that for you, I don’t blame you for resigning, I don’t blame you for hating me, I don’t even—“

“I don’t hate you.”

“—can even stand to look at me—wait, what?” He cracked a little smile. “You don’t hate me?”

He shook his head, red locks falling into his eyes. “I was a little uncomfortable, I admit, but no, I don’t hate you.”

I couldn’t speak for a few moments. “You should hate me, I would hate myself, I mean, it’s not even that I kissed you, I promised you that you didn’t have to come to pick me up, your sister just had a baby and you should have been there for her and I had to be stupid and get drunk and ruin everything—mmphf!” My rant was cut short by his arms wrapping around me, burying my face in his chest and feeling the warmth of his body.

“I said I forgive you, Y/N.”

Did I mention the butterflies I felt for some reason? And the way he said my name?

“…Taeyong?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re not my bodyguard anymore, right?”

“I’m not.”

“You’re not working for me anymore. You’re working with me. So can’t we be friends?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.”

 .

 “And you didn’t even tell me about it?” Jaehyun sounded scandalized. “I thought I was your best friend!” He huffed, crossing his arms. “I can’t believe you right now.”

“Just because you’re my best friend doesn’t mean I have to tell you everything,” Taeyong protested. We had brought Jae back inside after our conversation, to explain it to him as well.

“That’s what a best friend is, hyung! You got kissed by an award-winning actor and you didn’t even say anything?” He smacked his face. “I would have broadcasted it.”

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing I never kissed you,” I told him.

“Aw hey, come on, I’m not a bad kisser or anything.” He puckered his lips. “Wanna see?”

I pushed him away. “No. Keep your tongue in your own mouth.” I checked my watch. “I’d better get going before this doofus kisses me for real. See you guys later.”

-

 “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N, come here” was all I heard before I was yanked into an empty corridor a week later to see Jae in front of me, panting and looking both ways furtively.

“What? What is it?” I asked, nearly panicking. “Did something happen?”

“Yes,” he stressed, laying a hand over his heaving chest. “My heart is broken.”

“Oh for the love of—grow up, Jae!” I shouted, shoving him. He clapped a hand over my mouth.

“I’m serious, Y/N. I need your help.”

I pried his hand away. “For what?”

“Listen. Haven’t you been noticing something going on with Tae and Seulgi?”

That certainly caught my attention. “What are you hinting at?”

“They spend all their time together nowadays. It’s like they’re dating.” I couldn’t control the way my heart sank at his words.

“You think they’re dating?”

“No, but I don’t think it’s far off.” He ran a hand through his hair. “She knows I like her, she’s doing this on purpose.”

“Seulgi?”

“Yeah. So I’m going to make her jealous. And then beat Taeyong’s ass—sorry, hyung—for helping her plot something against me.”

“I don’t know how well that’s going to turn out, but yeah, sure, go for it. What do you need my help for?” His eyes glinted evilly. “Oh hell no. Jae. No. N. O. I am not going to—“

“How sweet, you act like you have a choice.” He grinned as if he knew every dark secret in my mind. “You’re going to help me and that’s that. Get ready. We start today.”

Weakly, I asked, “What am I supposed to do?”

“Act like I’m your boyfriend. Here, I’ll give you an example.” And then he pressed his lips to mine, just as two people rounded the corner. He jumped away from me in pretend shock, like he’d just been caught. My shock, however, was real. 100% real. I brought my hand up to cover my mouth.

“Hyung!” Jae said loudly. “What, what are you doing here?”

Taeyong crossed his arms, irritation on his face. “Better question is what you were doing.”

Heat crept up my cheeks. This was already a bad idea. I chanced a glance at Seulgi. She didn’t seem upset at all. On the contrary, she looked happy. As if she had been rooting for me and Jae to get together. I noticed how her arm was linked with Taeyong’s. I frowned inwardly, jealousy ripping through my veins. But why am I jealous? I’m supposed to be helping Jae get with Seulgi. It seems like she’s already with Taeyong. Are they a thing now? Is this official? When did this happen?

“It was just—nothing, hyung.” Jaehyun was still weaving his web of lies. “Remember how I said I wasn’t a bad kisser? I was just proving my point. We’re not, like, dating, or anything.”

Taeyong stared hard at Jae, eyes sliding toward Seulgi and then he smirked, like he was saying, I see what game you’re playing. I can see right through you. He took a step toward Jae. In a low voice that Seulgi couldn’t hear, he spoke: “I’m not a petty fool like you are. Know when to draw the line. Grow up, Jae.”

All I could hear was, try all you want, Jae, your girl is mine. And for some reason, it broke my heart. I inhaled sharply as the two of them walked off down the corridor. Jae stared at them, dismayed and I sunk to the floor.

“Whoa, hey, Y/N, you okay?” He knelt beside me. “Am I that great a kisser?” I pushed him. “No, but really, I’m sorry I kissed you just like that. I knew they were coming down the hall. You okay? You don’t look so good.”

I shook my head. “I just realized that I don’t like seeing them together.”

He squinted at me. “Why? You have a thing for Tae hyung or something?”

“Wha—no!” I spluttered. “It’s just, I—you and Seulgi look better together.”

“Oh. Thanks.” He sat down against the wall next to me. “I’m meddling again. I just hope things turn out okay.”

-

Jealousy. Burning rage coursed through me whenever I saw the two of them together, fawning over each other, Seulgi kissing him on the cheek, making little inside jokes and giggling about it to each other…the list seemed endless. It almost seemed as if Seulgi was doing all that to spite Jaehyun—as if both of them were in a battle to make each other snap. But I felt like I was the one hurting the most. Were they even dating? Or was this Seulgi’s plan to crush Jae’s advances? I wanted to know the truth.

-

“Is Seulgi dating Taeyong?” I demanded, slamming my fist down on Chanyeol’s desk. He jumped at the vibrations, startled at being disturbed from his work. He slid his headphones off, letting them hang around his neck, the picture of professionalism.

“Did you say something?”

“Is Seulgi dating Taeyong?”

He scoffed. “Seulgi? Dating Taeyong? Don’t be silly.”

“Then explain what’s happening between them! They do everything together.”

He leaned back in his chair. “I’m her favourite oppa. I’m pretty sure she would tell me—“ I raised my eyebrows at him “—or at least Wendy—if they were a thing.”

I was sceptical. “I don’t believe you.”

“Look, I—here.” He pulled out his phone and dialled her number. “I’m calling her. On speaker.” The other end of the line rang.

“Hello? Oppa?”

“Hey, Seulgi-yah. I have a question for you. Are you dating that kid in your choreo team? What’s his name? Taeyong?”

“Taeyong? No, I’m not dating him. Why do you ask?”

“Nothing, nothing, just some rumors flying around.”

“Ah, oppa, you know I’d tell you if I was.” Yeol flashed me a smug smile. I rolled my eyes.

“Thanks anyway, Seulgi-yah. I’ll let you practice now.” He hung up. “See? I told you it was nothing.”

“I still find it highly suspicious.”

“You know what I find suspicious?” He pointed his pencil at me. “I find it suspicious that you care so much about this.”

I knew where this was going. “I care because Jaehyun really likes her and I wanted him to be happy, but she’s always with Taeyong.”

Yeol smirked. “And it’s not because you’re in love with Taeyong, right?”

“I’m not in love with Taeyong!” I said hotly, kicking the legs of his desk.

“Your voice got higher. You’re in denial.”

I coughed. “I’m not in love with Taeyong,” I repeated, deepening my sound.

“I’m not in love with Taeyong,” He mocked. “You totally are. Just go tell him.”

“I’m not! You’re supposed to be on my side!”

-

But he was right. I was in denial.

Even as I held Jae’s hand, I wished it was Taeyong. When Jae came over to my room specifically when the duo was nearby, to cuddle or watch a movie, I wished it was Taeyong. When I posted something cheesy on my social media, people erupted, gushing about how cute it was that I was still thinking of Kai despite being busy in the States with shooting. Jaehyun would comment later (within earshot of the other two) that it was nice of me to say that about him. But it was about Taeyong. I wished it could be about Taeyong. When I lay in bed unable to sleep and wanting to see the stars, I crept out of my room to the roof. Alone. And saw nothing. And then my heart ached so badly that I wished desperately that Taeyong was with me. When Jae spent the night in my room, holding his hands up in surrender, promising me that he wouldn’t try anything, and when we fell asleep on the couch, I wished it was Taeyong.

He was right. I was in love.

But when had that happened? I realized it because of sheer jealousy. But when had I actually fallen in love? Throughout these twists and turns, from the first time I laid eyes on him in an elevator to when he became my bodyguard to now, when he swung off another girl in New York—somewhere, somehow, along the way, my heart had decided that it wanted to be with him.

.

“Holy shit,” I whispered, breath shaking. “I’m in love with him.”

 .

Chanyeol would yell at me. He would tease me and tell me that he had been saying that all along. Kai wouldn’t. And he didn’t. My boyfriend, in the public eye, at least, listened quietly as I went into a rant about everything that happened and what I felt about it. And then, what I was afraid of.  I was in tears by the end. Kai was patient. Kai was sympathetic. Kai could relate. His support made me feel so upset with myself and I had to apologize for not calling as often as I should have. But he forgave me. And that day, when the sun had set outside his dorm window, light filtered into mine.

“You don’t need to be upset or insecure because of Chang Wook,” he told me. “He saw that you were smitten without him having to do anything, and he took that chance. And then he had to give it up. That doesn’t mean you are incapable of being loved. I can’t answer whether you were in love with him or if it was idol-infatuation. Only you can say that. But right now, he’s not the one you want to be next to, is he?” I could hear him smiling on the other end. “You’re not going too fast. Life is meant to be lived. If you’ve found the person you want, there’s no right or wrong in it. It’s only whether you get up and do something about it, or let him slip away.” But what about us? I wanted to ask. What about the agency? What will they say? He understood. “Both of us love other people. But more than anyone else, Y/N, I love you and I want you to be happy. Get back in Korea and we’re going to take things into our own hands. We’re still people. We make our own decisions. We don’t have to tell them we found love, just that we don’t find it in each other. But now, I think you should go tell Yeol.”

“He’s going to make fun of me.”

“He won’t. He can support you now, when I can’t. Go to him.”

.

Chanyeol didn’t yell at me. He didn’t say I told you so. He didn’t smirk and he didn’t taunt. Uncharacteristically. But I was still grateful. I didn’t need to know that I had been wrong and he had been right. Our conversation was very brief. I told him that I’d come to my senses and he gripped my shoulders, taking a deep breath.

“Go tell him, you fool!” he shouted into my face. “Why the heck are you in my room?”

 -

 Taeyong was inside his room, I knew it. This is it, I thought. This is where everything turns out okay or where everything burns to ashes. And this time, I don’t think it will be fixed.

I lifted my hand to knock, but faltered when I heard voices.

“Jung Jaehyun, you take this too far!”

I gasped at the ferocity in his voice. Who knew Taeyong could be this scary?

“What did I do now?” I couldn’t believe the sass in Jae’s tone. If I had been in his place, I would have vaporized on the spot.

“You slept in Y/N’s room last night?”

Wait, why am I being dragged into this? Why does Taeyong care? Jae did that to make Seulgi jealous…right?

“Yeah. I did. Why do you care so much, hyung?” There was a teasing lilt to his voice that I couldn’t quite place.

Silence. “Don’t play this game, Jaehyun.”

“You started it. I didn’t.”

Game? Started what game?

“I only agreed to it because Seulgi came to me saying that she liked you but you were always with Y/N and she wanted me to help make you jealous.”

The familiar words rang a bell. Wait. Wait. What’s going on? Isn’t that the same thing Jae told me? That he wanted my help making Seulgi jealous?

“Huh. So you did start it. You got with Seulgi to make me upset, so I got with Y/N to make her upset. Where do you come in all this, hyung? What’s got you so tied up?”

So that’s why Jaehyun said all that. Okay, that makes sense.

“You know why.”

“No, hyung, I don’t. You’re not willing to admit it, you don’t want to go and do something about it, so why should I bother?”

I felt the tension build up, the air suddenly change. The fight had just gotten a lot more personal. I really shouldn’t be eavesdropping.

“Hyung, just admit it and I’ll back off.”

“Why do I need to admit anything? You already know about it! When I agreed to Seulgi’s plan, I didn’t think it would hurt me so much.”

I could relate. I could totally relate—wait. What?

“Why does it hurt you, hyung?” Jaehyun was fully mocking him now. I was terrified at his change in behaviour. I told myself the only reason I was still standing outside listening was to dash in if a fistfight broke out. “What part about me staying the night at Y/N’s, don’t you like? Huh? What part about me and Y/N kissing gets you so angry? Or better yet, what was the real reason you resigned that night after Y/N kissed you? Answer that, hyung?”

The words hit me forcefully. I imagined they did for him too. I staggered.

“It’s okay, hyung.” Jae’s voice was softer. “Just admit it.”

“I’m in love with Y/N.”

I clapped my hands over my mouth. The voices in my head muted. My traitor of a heartbeat picked up speed.

“That’s all there was to it, hyung. Just one sentence. Do you know how hard Seulgi and I worked for this? God, we drew blueprints for our plans and everything. You’re so dense.”

I couldn’t think anymore, but Taeyong’s renewed fury summed up my feelings pretty well. “Wait, you two planned this? So you don’t like each other?”

“Seulgi’s a great friend to have, hyung. That’s all. We’re not into each other like that.”

For a long moment, nobody spoke. I raised my hand weakly and knocked twice.

.

The door swung open. Jae.

From his expression, it was clear he understood that I heard everything. He pulled the door open wider.

“Thank me later, hyung. I just saved you both a lot of embarrassment.”

My eyes were only on Taeyong. Even though my face was burning and his finally matched his hair, I couldn’t seem to take my eyes off of him.

By impulse, my feet propelled me forward at the same his did.

.

Cliché, I know, but kissing Taeyong was better than anything I could have come up with. And trust me, I spent a lot of time imagining what it would be like to kiss him, what it had been like the night of the party, wishing I just remembered for once, because his lips were dry, his breathing was hot and heavy and his body suffocating.

Kissing Taeyong wasn’t just a punch of desire straight to my gut. It was the weight lifted off my chest. It was a soothing chill to my continuously aching heart. It was the fireworks, the bursting sense of bliss that threatened to escape my body, but it was also the calmness, the peace of the sea that had devoured the ship at last.

Kissing Taeyong wasn’t the spring breeze and the summer sun. It wasn’t the winter sky or the autumn leaves. It was nothing that existed in the plane of reality that my words could describe. For the first time, I was grateful that I couldn’t remember the party, because this was as great of a first kiss as I was going to get.

Kissing Taeyong was light-headedness, as if my brain couldn’t handle what was going on, as if my pounding heart was pumping the wrong way. I couldn’t think at all. It was just me and him, and his lips, over and over again. It was just his hands on my waist and mine in his hair and the pressure of his fingers and the coarseness under my own.

He pulled away first and I rested my forehead on his shoulder, dizzy, knees weak. I didn't trust myself to speak. Or move, for that matter. His face was buried in my neck, his breathing heavier than mine. My hands clung onto his arms. His were still around me.

Neither of us spoke. Neither of us needed to. But—

“Woohoo. Fucking finally. When’s the wedding?”

“Jae, just get out.”

  -

 “Kai and I have an announcement to make.”

The room burst into whispers.

“Y/N and I are not dating. We never were. We apologize for deceiving the public, but we cannot hide this any longer. We are best friends. Nothing more. We will not be answering questions. Sorry for the inconvenience. Thank you all for coming.”

  -

Epilogue

“Jesus, this party is so boring,” Jae complained, empty glass in hand. “Why do promo if the parties aren’t worth anything?”

“Are you being serious right now? I can literally see three shades of lipstick under your collar.” I teased him, poking at his neck.

“Don’t do that. There’s nothing there,” he drawled. His attention was diverted by a waiter passing by with a tray of drinks. In a flash, he had swapped out his glass with a filled one.

“You are going to get drunk at this rate,” I remarked. “And then there will definitely be three shades of lipstick on your collar and in several other places.”

Downing half his drink, he stamped his foot. “It was one time, okay? Give it a rest. I’m a changed man.”

“You’re already scoping out the ladies here.”

He turned to me, arm raised as if to punch me in the face, but a hand grabbed his and yanked it down.

“Are you trying to pick a fight here, bro? Lay off.” I smiled sweetly at the welcome intervention. “Don’t touch Y/N.”

“Hey, I was just playing, hyung. You know I won’t do anything.” He finished his drink.

“Yeah, yeah. Thanks for sticking around. You go and find a hook-up now.” Jae didn’t need asking twice. He was lost in the crowd in an instant. I smiled fondly, despite his rashness. “The fame went straight to his head, didn’t it?” I returned my attention to the person who had just arrived.

“Hi,” I whispered in Taeyong’s ear, hooking my arms around his neck.

“No,” he replied, freeing himself from my embrace. “Paparazzi.” I pouted. He glanced quickly around the room, bent down and pecked my lips. It was over way too soon. I whined. Squeezing my thigh, he lowered his voice. “Be patient, baby. Wait until we get back to your room.” If I said his voice didn’t send a jolt of arousal through me, I would be a dirty liar.

“Hm. Okay.” I let the matter drop for the moment. “Promise?”

“Of course.” Our fingers intertwined underneath the table. “I’ll take care of you, baby. I’ll always protect you.”

-

fin.

A/N: dont @ me im sorry about how awful this is i just wanted to finish it

[kamino-ink]

Finifugal | Park Chanyeol

✧ finifugal - hating endings; of someone who tries to avoid or prolong the final moment of a story, relationship, or some other journey.

✧ 01 | 02 | ???

✧ Genre: Bodyguard!au, angst, fluff, romance, probably smut at some point lets be honest

��� Summary: After an ambush that leaves your left shoulder in stitches, your head bodyguard decides to scour the country in search for a new recruit to help up your safety - when Park Chanyeol shows up and his first request is to dye his hair, you can’t help but wonder who in the world Junmyeon just so happened to recruit.

✧ Word Count: 1k [this is just an intro, hence the shorter wordcount, but in the following segments they’ll hopefully reach at least 3.5k]

                                         ✧

 “I cannot believe that Junmyeon went behind my back to hire a new bodyguard!” You hissed in utter disbelief, your anger-filled voice echoing in the large laboratory you were currently stationed in. If you could drag that stubborn man back to the compound and strangle him, well, you would - which you were vocalizing very heavily as you recklessly went about your business, fingers streaming across the keyboard of your laptop to respond to some lousy deal from another cartel.

 Kyungsoo, another of your bodyguards normally wearing a stoic expression and a black baseball cap atop his mostly bare head, held back the growing urge to roll his eyes into the back of his skull. “Y/N, its time for us to add another person to the team. Eight of us clearly isn’t enough to protect you-”

 “Yes, you are - it isn’t any of your all’s fault that we got ambushed, alright?” You refuted just as quickly, fingers still typing furiously while you corrected the man. Ever since that night, resulting in a majority of your left shoulder being covered in rather ugly stitches, many of the boys had come to blame themselves for the matter. Of course, you disagreed heavily, and just about snapped whenever one of them began to degrade their abilities in your presence.

 Honestly, the stitches didn’t seem to affect you as much as everyone else assumed they would have; then again, you recalled going through much worse experiences. “Seriously Kyungsoo, fucking drop it before I lose my collective shit.” The threat came out low and irritated, but to the stockier man, it meant little to nothing; he and the others were practically immune to your silly threats - even if they came from the leader of one of the biggest drug cartels in South Korea.

 While the boys knew you to be a young woman with a passion for donating to charities and sobbing over silly romcoms, the public eye viewed you as a local terrorist who only sold drugs to make bank and buy lavish expenses. To the rich and even the poor, who you constantly made an effort to help build a better life, you were one of the most rotten people to walk the face of the earth.

 But no matter how much anti-you propaganda you stumbled upon, no matter how many pleads you saw online for the world leaders to just out you and get it over with, you continued to do your work. Each day was filled with the pressure of deals, trades, and keeping customers satisfied.

 To keep everyone you serviced happy and satisfied, you decided to start crafting your own drugs; having a background in chemistry certainly aided you in this difficult and rather dangerous endeavor.

 The world was against your very existence, yet the boys who you came to call family supported every step you took into the darkness and misery of being the head of the cartel.

 Which is why you despised them constantly saying they were at fault for the accident that nearly took your left arm.

 After you both had fallen into a semi-comfortable silence, you kept your lips sealed and continued working on replying to the plethora of messages flooding the screen of your laptop. Every now and then you would glance over at the internalized clock nudged in the corner of the screen littered with text, checking to see how much time would pass until Junmyeon and the new recruit showed up. While you were obviously still infuriated that the older man had gone behind your back to get this guy or girl, your curiosity was mildly peaked to a general extent.

 Junmyeon was known to be incredibly picky with who did and didn't join the inner circle - otherwise known as EXO to the citizens of South Korea. You weren’t technically part of EXO, as your identity was essentially a passing shadow that happened to lead the cartel that stretched from Busan all the way to Ontario, touching almost every capital in the world. Junmyeon lead the circle of men as a whole, though there’s also a sub-group that are always seen at the head of complicated operations; EXO-CBX. Once again, you weren’t technically part of that either.

 At one point, there had been a separated faction of EXO, but that fell through, leaving only eight of the original eleven men to protect your cartel; hence why you were shocked Junmyeon had even bothered to obtain another bodyguard. The past events and actions of EXO weren’t exactly bright, instead stained with splotches of dark grime; how he was so willing to go through with his idea was left unknown to you.

 In the midst of your silent, rumbling wallowing, the main door to the laboratory had been swung open.

 “Yah, Y/N, Jun and the new guy - who is mighty fine, by the way, are waiting for you in the living room.” Baekhyun announced loudly, his lips curling into an amused smirk when you let out a huff of agitation and slammed your laptop shut, the sound startling a dozing Kyungsoo, who had been leaning against the wall closest to you for a while now.

 “Don’t scare him off by flirting with him, alright Baek?” You chide the man with furrowed eyebrows, stepping up onto your tiptoes to flick his forehead. “As much as I hate this and want to  personally slam Jun’s face against a door, I don’t want the guy to run off... yet.”

 The brunette haired man snickered softly in amusement at your harsh words, his hand coming to playfully pat your back as he turns and follows you out of the lab, a tired but alert Kyungsoo right behind the two of you.

 As you sauntered into the living space, chilled hands tucked into the depths of the pockets of your baggy sweatpants, your gaze immediately met those of a stranger’s; said tall stranger towering next to the head of EXO.

 “You’re the boss around here, right? I’m Park Chanyeol, and I was wondering if I could dye my hair pink.”

                                         ✧

[baeksoobookshelf]

i’m talking bout forever (2641 words) by lady-serendipity Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: EXO (Band) Rating: T Relationships: Baeksoo Characters: Kim Jongin | Kai, Kim Minseok | Xiumin, Park Sooyoung | Joy Genre: Fluff, Angst, Humour AU: Bodyguard, Royalty Warning: violence Summary:  

his definitely ranks among one of Kyungsoo’s worst birthdays, and Kyungsoo has had some not so great birthday experiences. (Hint: it's about to get worse and maybe better).

Follow baeksoobookshelf to see more baeksoo fics. :)

[straylightdream]

Cold, wicked and ruthless we’re all words that people used to describe Junmyeon, but when it came to her he made an oath to protect her. Sehun was assigned to watch over her, he never expected for her to break down his walls.

♡ status: discontinued being changed into a skz story. 

♡ genre: mafia/ bodyguard au, romance, smut

♡ pairing: Kim Junmyeon (mob boss) x reader & Oh Sehun (bodyguard) x reader

♡ warnings: sexual situations, angst, mentions of violence, injuries, death, blood, ptsd

1 2 3

↳ moodboard and playlist

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* the taglist is open send a message or send an ask if you would like to be tagged*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[exo-reacts-to-you]

New Euphoria

♡ genre: angst & smut

summary: you, the most elite female bodyguard have been call upon to protect one of the 9 dangerous billionaires. as you begin to protect them, you slowly recover what you had thought you had left behind in your past life and see what’s behind their masks that they wear to conceal what they wanted to hide from the cruel world.

*each story, the reader (you) have a different backstory as well as the members.

1/ choose to protect Kyungsoo ♥ Alluring Aura  ←

2/ choose to protect Kai ♥ [coming soon]

3/ choose to protect Chanyeol ♥ [coming soon]

4/ choose to protect Sehun ♥ [coming soon]

5/ choose to protect Xiumin ♥ [coming soon]

6/ choose to protect Suho ♥ [coming soon]

7/ choose to protect Chen ♥ [coming soon]

8/ choose to protect Yixing ♥ [coming soon]

9/ choose to protect Baekhyun ♥ [coming soon]

[youngjaelook]

Regret It — Bodyguard!Wu Yifan

author's note — i had gotten requests to do yifan angst and jakwnaowme im so so so sorry it took this long for me to deliver! also this is lowkey abt junmyeon and reader idk im sorryygaiwnajw hope u guys enjoy this anyways <33 #UNEDITED

request from anon — Can I get a request with Kris Wu? Bodyguard AU! Angst.

request from @biathinks — I heard requests were open so can you write an angsty yifan drabble lol thanks

summary — You eventually fall for the man you can't have, your bodyguard. And in the end, it might just get you both killed.

warnings — character death, angst & strong language.

word count — 2.4K

"You're supposed to be protecting the boss' sister, not fucking her brains out." Hui was worried for his hyung. The end result of his reckless behavior and raging hormones would probably be him swallowing led. "Hyung, are you even paying attention to what I'm saying?"

Yifan had heard it all before. The warnings, the scoldings, nothing about it was new to him. He knew the consequences of his actions, but he didn't really bother to quote, "give a flying fuck about it."

Yifan simply smiled at the younger boy and chuckled. "Don't worry about me, Hui-ah. I won't die, at least not yet." Hui visibly cringed at the last part. He cared about Yifan immensely. I mean, how could he not? Yifan had practically raised him ever since he had first joined the mafia and the mere thought of the older man being shot dead, or worse, tortured, made his heart clench in pain.

"What if they hurt her too? Just to spite you."

Yifan hadn't thought of it that way. He swallowed thickly and shook his head. "That won't happen."

Hui fiddled the ends of his jacket and sighed. "Who are you trying to convince here? Me or yourself?"

The images came in a blinding white. You were splayed on the floor, crimson pooling around your limp body. The maniacal laugh of your brother ringing in his ears. Yifan blinked them away. "Just drink your beer and let's get the hell out of here already."

The conversation ended there. There was no more talk after that, not even when they piled inside the car and drove off.

It was nearly half past ten and you were buried underneath layers of soft, silk sheets, asleep and at peace, until had felt the familiar touch of Yifan lingering on the exposed skin of your cheek. You stirred in your sleep and unbeknownst to you, you smiled out of instinct.

Yifan did this often. He would come into your room when the manor fell quiet and asleep, admiring the image of yourself in deep, tranquil slumber. He thought you looked prettiest like this; eyes closed, lips parted and mind at rest. He knew you also felt better when you were asleep because then you wouldn't have to face your demons, or your brother, which who could also amount to the title of the devil's associate himself.

When his touch could no longer be felt on your skin, you whined involuntarily and called for him.

Yifan couldn't resist you, even from the start when you were just merely the boss' sister, whom he'd have to guard and protect at all costs. "Sleep well now, baby." His voice coaxes you back to sleep.

Morning comes and you're now alone in your bed, much to your dismay. You ran a finger along your cheek, reminiscing the way Yifan's touch had lingered there. You smiled to yourself at the thought of him.

And speaking of the devil, he comes through the door, hair slightly unkempt and lips set in a frown. "Get ready, your brother is coming to visit."

"Brother," the word tastes bitter in your mouth and for one reason only; Junmyeon could never call himself your brother. The man, although sweet and kind towards you, was anything but towards those who worked, or rather slaved, for him and to those who had wronged him or your family.

Yifan sighed. "Please just ready," with that, he leaves and you get out of bed with a roll of your eyes, and a slump of your shoulders.

You always dreaded visits from your brother. Talking to him was like talking to a ticking time bomb. At any given moment, he could explode and the damage was far beyond repair. You've been there many times before, but unlike the rest, you're probably the only one who makes it out alive each time. Being his sister had it's perks, I guess you could say.

You're dressed in white when he comes through the manor's doors. He looks dashing and handsome as per usual; hair slicked back, suit pressed and crisp, and designer shoes shiny and pristine as he takes long strides towards you. You don't bother to hide the displeasure in your face when he stops in front of you. You didn't like your brother, that much was obvious, so why bother hiding it?

Junmyeon tried to give you a smile.

"Y/N," he greets you. "how uhm, how have you been?"

Your gaze hardens and you peer behind his shoulder to catch a glimpse of the pretty plaything he managed to drag along. Poor girl, is all you can think of for her. "I've been better. What about yourself? I see you've brought someone along with you today? She's pretty."

Junmyeon glances behind his shoulder and nods. "She's just a friend —"

"Oh I'm sure she is." Junmyeon narrows his eyes at you as if to tell you to cut it out, but you enjoyed to poke fun at him. It's refreshing to see him all flustered and red. It makes you feel better.

"Ah Yifan, so good to see you." You don't miss the shift in your brother's tone. It sends a chill down your spine. And judging by the sinister glint in his eyes, you figure Junmyeon knows something you don't. "Now that you're here, I'd like to speak to both of you in the dining hall. Perhaps, in private?" You glance over at Yifan for a brief moment, panic evident in your eyes.

Yifan, on the other hand, remains calm and stoic. Not flinching once when your brother sends him and yourself a mischievous stare.

Junmyeon situates himself at the the head of the table because growing up, he's been taught that whoever sat at the head of the table had the most power and Junmyeon knew he had power, a lot of it actually.

He pulls out his gun from it's holster and twirls it around in his hand.

"You both know, especially you Yifan, that I hate it when people deceive me." He starts and you already know where this is going and where this will end. "So imagine my surprise when a little birdy tells me that one of my best men goes behind my back and starts fucking around with my sister." You were caught red handed.

Yifan doesn't even flinch when Junmyeon cocks his pistol and aims it at him.

"I need to hear you both admit it right now. Tell me right now, or I swear to god I will shoot you in the fucking head —"

"Why do you even care, Junmyeon?"

Junmyeon can't contain his shock at your informal addressing towards him. You usually called him oppa, or Junmyeon-oppa. He glared at you. "Why do I even — What do you even mean by that? Of course I care! I'm your brother for god's sake!"

You step in front of Yifan, arms crossed and eyes turned into slits. This was your tipping point.

You scoffed. "You don't act like one, that's for sure."

Junmyeon's eyes widen. "Excuse me?"

"You know what I don't get? How can you claim to care for me yet you hurt the people I love, leave me to wither away in this god forsaken mansion? You don't care for me, you don't even love me." Junmyeon had never felt this overwhelmed by hurt in a long time. The last time he felt this way was when your parents had been massacred along with a few of your uncles and close family friends.

"You push me away, locked me in here, and killed our Shownu-oppa and yet demand that I respect and treat you like you're my brother?" Your voice rises with each word your utter and by the end of your sentence, you're screaming your lungs out and crying pathetically.

Yifan has his hands on either side of your waist and this seems to set Junmyeon off. The bullet misses Yifan by millimeters and he cripples to the ground, clutching his ringing ear.

"What the fuck!" You yell at Junmyeon, who looks absolutely livid with his wild, bloodshot eyes.

He stands up from his seat and storms over to where you stood. "Get out of the fucking way." But you stood your ground, shielding Yifan's body with your own.

"Move or I will shoot you." He threatened.

You mocked him. "I dare you."

Junmyeon, blinded by rage, slaps you across the cheek so hard it sends you flying to the floor. Yifan sees this and is quick to tackle Junmyeon to the ground with a yell. "You don't fucking put your hands on her!" He growls in between his jabs.

Yifan is aware that he's a dead man after this whole situation. You don't beat your boss to a pulp and expect to come out alive in the end. Again, there are always consequences to your actions. But for you, Yifan is willing to risk it all.

Hui watches with wide eyes as Yifan lands a particularly hard blow, and a loud crunch could be heard throughout the room. He practically drags Yifan off their boss and rushes to aid Junmyeon, who, by the looks of it, is in pretty bad shape. "Jesus Christ! Yifan, you nearly killed him!" The other men in the room back him into a corner with their guns raised at him.

"Yifan!"

All eyes fall on you and the evident gash on your cheek. There's blood that runs down your face. Junmyeon's ring, the ring that all of the mafia wore, Yifan included, had broke the skin of your face, which resulted in you bleeding profusely. He hit you pretty damn hard.

The pretty girl Junmyeon had brought with him earlier was by his side, wiping away the blood that dripped from the wound on his eyebrow with the sleeves of the blazer she had on and glared at you.

"Get off me, I'm alright!" Junmyeon struggled to get on his feet, but managed anyways. He walked slowly towards Yifan. "You're a fucking dead man, you know that? First, you screw my sister, and now you try to kill me? You have a fucking death wish!" Yifan grins smugly at him. "I should have hit you harder." The first shot was made and the bullet went straight into Yifan's thigh.

You screamed and ran towards Yifan, but you were pulled back by Hui, who looked absolutely mortified in that moment. He didn't want you to get caught in the cross fire.

"Junmyeon stop! Stop it!" But your pleas fell on deaf ears as the second shot echoed in your ears. This time, the bullet dug itself into his arm. "The next bullet is going straight through your fucking head."

You pounded against Hui's chest as you screamed desperately for your brother to stop. "You think killing him will make you a better brother? You think I'd ever forgive you after this? I hate you and I will always hate you no matter what!" That seemed to struck a nerve in Junmyeon as his gun was now aimed at you.

"Shut the fuck up!" He sneered.

Hui's grip seemed to loosen around you, and you took this opportunity to march right up to your brother. "What, you're going to shoot me now? Just like you shot Shownu-oppa? You think you're capable of killing another one of your siblings, huh?"

Tears spilled from the brim of his slightly swollen eyes and it's the first time in a long time you've seen him like this; so vulnerable and hurt.

"Let's face it, Junmyeon. We can never go back to the way we once were, you had decided that the moment you killed our brother."

Junmyeon was practically breathing in your face as he stepped closer. "He killed our parents. He killed aeomma and appa, even Heechul-hyung. You remember Heechul, don't you? He was a kind man, extremely warm and loving. But he's dead and it's all because of Shownu."

You swallowed bitterly. "Our parents weren't good people, nor was Heechul-oppa and you know that. You and I can both attest to their wrong doings. I remember we were kids and you told me, you fucking promised me that you were going to be nothing like them. But here you are now, a monster. Just like our parents. Just like the person you promised you'd never become."

Junmyeon wails and for a moment, you think he'd change his mind, that he'd finally come to his senses. But the gun goes off for the third time and your white dress is tainted in crimson. Your cripple to your knees and you hear Yifan scream in the background.

Junmyeon doesn't even look at you as you bled out on the floor.

"You are a bastard! I'll fucking kill you!" Yifan is red in the face, tears streaming down his cheeks as he watches as you struggle to breathe and cope with the burning sensation in your side. "I'll kill you."

Junmyeon smiles at him. "I'll see you in hell."

Four gun shots and Yifan falls limp to the floor.

Junmyeon sighs. "Get her to Doctor Choi, so he can stitch her up or something."

Everything just happens in a blur and on occasion, you fall in and out of an inviting darkness that wraps itself around you like a warm, cashmere blanket. You had never felt so at peace.

You were half-awake when you hear your brother's soft voice talking to you. "I'm trying. I really am. I don't want you to go down the path I went, or the path Shownu-hyung went. I want you to be different, to be better."

"I'm just scared for you," he admits in a low voice. "All I want is the best for you. Yifan, that man was just going to get you killed. Hell, even being my sister could get you killed. But I just, I don't want to risk it any further." When his lips press against the back of your hand, your heart cries out and you suddenly want to be nine, playing with paper airplanes with Junmyeon and making promises you can't keep.

"I did this for you." He gets up and starts to walk to the exit.

Your eyes flutter open. "You killed the man I love, you could never justify that." Junmyeon spins around and stares at you wide-eyed. "Sometimes, I wish it was you that died and not Shownu-oppa." When the words roll of your tongue, a strange feeling of relief fills your chest along with the bitter taste of regret lingering in your mouth.

Junmyeon nods and smiles softly at you. "Me too, me too."