#except when she gets her heart broken but now she's in a long term relationship and i really do think her gf will the mother of her children

[aphrogeneias]

i love giving characters some quirks inspired by my irl friend

[street-smarts00]

Clingy

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader (BAU!reader)

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WC: 3.7k

Summary: You tended to be very expressive with your friends when showing your affection. Whether it showed in pet names or physical touch. Only thing is, Spencer thinks he’s falling in love with you, and all of your sweet affectionate actions are starting to take a toll on his unrequited heart. At least, he thinks it’s unrequited. 

Tags: there’s a tiny bit of miscommunication but not too much that it will make your head explode like it does mine. Make out but nothing grown/spicy. Friends to lovers. A bit of hurt/comfort

A/N: Not beta read don’t kill me! yoooo spence is so in denial about her feelings in this but lol so real king. This is mostly from his POV but I had to cheat a few times. Hope i can live up to the hype that complimentary colors was. I low key don't like this one as much but had to execute it cause the idea was cute.

You were starting to drive him insane. Criminally insane. You could invade his thoughts at any waking moment of his day and take over his mind. Every affectionate pet name, every soft fleeting touch, hell every time you look at him, he would replay the moment in his mind like a broken record. If he was in a crowded room, his eyes would always fall on you. 

After being with the BAU for a while you became good friends with your coworkers. And with that, came your habit of calling your friends sweet nicknames. Anything from sweetie, to honey, to babes, and the one that broke his heart the most, my love. 

At first he didn’t understand why you were using terms of endearment that were typically used in a romantic relationship, but in a platonic way. At some point he caught on that you were similar to Garcia when it came to expressing your love for friends. Similar to her and the way she has her own sweet silly way of expressing how she cares.

Nevertheless, some small part of his heart still broke when you called him those names. He adored your sweet caring nature and the fact that you cared enough about him to call him terms of endearment. But every time a nickname fell from your lips, he was reminded you only meant it platonically. 

It was his own personal torture to constantly be reminded he would never be your sweetie, your honey … your love. But the nicknames weren’t enough to drive him insane. While it drove him to the brink of insanity, he was able to keep his head somewhat still on his shoulders. 

Not long after the heart warming but crushing nicknames, you showed your true love language. Physical touch. It showed in many forms. It could show when poking JJ in the shoulder and giving Emily a high five. Or nudging Morgan in his side with your elbow. You even managed to get a fist pump from Hotch and Rossi. And of course the welcome and goodbye hugs from Penelope. 

You were a bit hesitant at first to express this love language of yours with Spencer due to his aversion to touch and germs. However, you observed that he would gratefully receive occasional touches. Whether it be a hug, high-five, or even the rare ruffle of his hair -which of course would be from Morgan. So you approached him and asked if he was comfortable with physical contact. 

When it came to you, he was more than comfortable. You could take him in your arms and he would simply melt into a puddle on the floor. Except he didn’t say that and his reply was closer to a mix of stuttering and rambling about how you could never make him uncomfortable and how he just doesn’t like germs. 

Now he’s not saying he regrets his choices. He wouldn’t ever take it back. He enjoys every single lingering touch between the two of you. Actually “enjoys” would be a severe understatement. Every single time you ruffle his hair, lean your head on his shoulder, or even just carefully touch his arm, it was as if a thousand volts of electricity were flowing through him. Like he could light up the city even. You were the best part of his days and the reason breath filled his lungs. You brought a light into his life that made him feel safe and warm. 

He desperately wanted your affection, your attention, your touch, to mean something more than he knew it to be. But sooner or later, touch after touch, he started to go insane. Somewhere along the way he had daydreamed so deep he had lost his mind. 

You had officially driven Spencer Reid insane. 

He was promptly whisked away from his thoughts when he felt the tap of a folder on his shoulder and a light thump on his desk. 

“Hotch wants to know your thoughts on the consultation from Colorado,” you started. 

He blinked back into focus glancing at the papers on his desk. 

“Hey, you alright?” You asked with concern. “You look like your head is in the clouds.”

“I’m fine, just lost in thought,” he answered with a small smile reassuring you.

“Don��t get too lost. Can’t have your genius brain short circuiting on us.” You chuckled as you took a small step closer to him and playfully ruffled his hair. 

“I’ll try not to,” he grinned and pushed his hair back after you messed with it. 

“Well I’ll be back soon, my love. Gotta go bother Penelope,” you joked before making your way out of the bullpen. 

His gaze was lingering on you as you left. His thoughts started to drift to you again as his cheeks turned pink.

“I’ll be back soon, my love,” Morgan mimicked in a higher pitched voice with a grin as he approached Spencer's desk. In response Spencer turned his chair away from Morgan to hide his now red face. 

“When are you two going to start dating? You guys already act like a couple.” 

“We do not act like a couple,” Spencer argued. “She just sometimes calls me pet names, that's normal for her.” 

“You don’t see it do you?” Morgan furrowed his eyebrows and was seconds away from chuckling. “She’s been giving you quite a bit of attention lately. Practically clinging onto you.” 

“I mean I- I don’t think so. She does that with everyone, it's not just me. She just happens to be very affectionate with friends.” He answers as his voice almost cracked. 

Morgan shook his head, “Oh no it’s more than that. Have you ever noticed that she calls you “my love” but she calls us “love”? Or when we’re on a long flight back home and you two are all cuddly on the jet. How she always seeks out your company and finds an excuse to talk to you or about you.” 

Spencer couldn’t speak. He had so many words on the tip of his tongue but his voice wouldn’t make a sound. He sat frozen and mouth slightly agape as his brain started to go into overdrive. 

Morgan's face softened at Spencer's reaction. “It’s different with you kid. Friends don’t act like that.” 

“You and Garcia do.” Spencer countered, this time definitely with a voice crack. Morgan lightly chucked. He was well aware that his and Penelope’s friendship was a bit different than other male/female friendships. 

“Okay you got me there, but you and Y/N aren’t me and Garcia. We may flirt with each other a lot but that’s our thing. You two have this care for each other like nothing I've ever seen.” 

Spencer was left stunned once again and Morgan could practically see the gears in his head turning.

“You may not notice it now, or hell you may not let yourself notice it now, but it’s true.” 

Those words rang in the back of Spencer's mind for days. Of course on a regular basis you would occupy his mind at any given moment. But now it wasn’t just thoughts about you. His mind was over analyzing almost every interaction between you and him, trying to find what Morgan had talked about. Some form of evidence that proved what you felt for him was beyond what he had initially thought. 

He was recounting all the recent times you had approached him out of the members of your team. He recalled all the times you were either hanging out or on the jet and you found yourself tracing patterns on his arm. He was rethinking when you started to use nicknames around him and how it could be different with him than with others. It turned out Morgan might be right, as Spencer realized the numerous times you referred to Garcia or Emily as “love”, but in the rare instance you said “my love” it was only ever directed to him. 

The idea of you liking him back had become an all consuming thought, but he was too terrified to ask you. What if Morgan was wrong? Profilers have been wrong before. He became petrified by the idea of asking you about it and possibly finding out his feelings were unrequited. But most of all, he was scared of losing you. Scared that if he brought it up he would make things awkward and ruin your friendship. He couldn’t lose you, not over something as trivial as his feelings. 

Unfortunately the mental toll this was taking on his mind started to show. Not so obvious that the everyday person would notice, but you weren’t an everyday person. You grew to know him like the back of your hand. So of course you started to notice the little changes in his behavior. His ever so slight flinch when you would initially touch him. His eyes which used to linger on you and catch your eyes from across the room, now focused almost anywhere you weren’t. The way his body froze when you placed a hand on his shoulder. The way his eyes partially widened when you called him anything other than his name. 

He tried to hide his worries from you, but you could tell something was bothering him. 

Something about you.

His overall behavior didn’t reflect that he was avoiding you or distancing himself from you. He still talked to you and acted around you like normal. Instead it felt like he was holding himself back from receiving or truly appreciating your affection the way he used to. 

~

Days had passed and the team was sent on a case. While this case was an emotional rollercoaster for everyone, it had affected you the most. The victims had reminded you of yourself and the unsub and all of his delusional reasoning for his actions had hit very close to home. 

The team caught the unsub and closed the case quite late in the evening. Everyone was exhausted after the grueling past few days and decided to spend the night at the hotel to rest and leave in the morning. You however, still felt an ache in your stomach from all the anxiety felt throughout the day. You couldn’t seem to relax and let that weight off your shoulders. So you went to the one person who could help.  

Spencer was getting ready to go to sleep, peacefully reading a book in bed when he got a knock on his door. He placed his book down and when he opened the door he was greeted by you in pajama pants and a zip up hoodie, clearly also winding down for the night. 

“Hey,” you greeted. 

“Hi, what’s up? Is everything okay?” he asked, a bit concerned as to why you showed up at his hotel so late at night. He opened the door wider signaling you were welcome inside. You entered the room and stuffed your hands in your pockets as he closed the door. 

“I’m okay I just …” you cleared your throat. “I know this case has been a tough one but today’s been really hard for me. I’m still wired and awake, I can’t seem to relax enough to go to sleep,” You abruptly stopped your rambling to catch your breath. 

“This might sound dumb but, I’m in desperate need of a hug right now,” you finally admitted quietly.

He hated seeing you so timid and closed off. How you made yourself smaller than you were, all because you were asking for your basic needs to be met. 

“You don’t have to explain yourself.” 

“Huh?” 

“You don’t have to explain why you need a hug. You can just ask,” he said reassuringly. 

“Oh.” 

“Physical contact has been shown to increase levels of dopamine, serotonin, and even oxytocin; therefore, decreasing levels of stress and anxiety. Some people might even argue that physical touch is a fundamental element of being human and experiencing life.” His other way of trying to validate your feelings was of course rambling a string of facts and information from his fingertips. 

You couldn’t help but smile. God he loved it when you smiled. 

“So is that a yes?” you asked since you never exactly got an answer from your question in the first place. Even though you knew what his answer was. 

The corners of his lips turned into a grin. “Come here,” he says with outstretched arms. 

You practically ran into him at his offer. He wrapped his arms around you as you placed yours around his neck. He wished this moment could last forever. All while at the same time Morgan's previous statements were circling around in his head. 

He tried his best to push them away. He tried to tell himself this was not you acting on any potential feelings for him. This was simply you reaching out to a friend in need. 

He took note of the way you held onto him so tightly, almost as if he could leave at any second. It made his heart ache. 

“You feel tired,” he almost whispered. 

“I am,” you mumbled back, face buried in his neck. 

“Do you wanna lie down?” 

You lightly patted him on the back, “Don’t worry I’ll leave you be and go to sleep soon. I just need a minute 

“I meant … I meant do you want to lie down here?” He stammered. “So you’re not alone. You seem like you need a friend right now.” 

His own heart almost cracks when he says friend. But that’s what you need right now, a friend. 

“I’d like that,” you said with a small smile. 

You separate from him and he leads you to the bed holding your hand. He sits down against the headboard and waits for you to join him. 

You awkwardly sit down on the bed, eyes darting in all directions of where he’s sitting. “I- what should I …” 

“You could sit down the way you do on the jet,” he kindly offers. 

You relax at his words and move to sit at his side. He wraps his arm around you as you rest your head against his shoulder. You both sat there in a moment of silence, enjoying eachothers company. He was getting lost in the sweet smell of your perfume; the small bit of it that still lingers from the long day you’ve had. 

He started to recall all the times you two would be close like this. It didn’t happen very often. Sometimes on a long jet ride home from a long or stressful case. Or sometimes when the team went out for drinks and you would be tired from dancing. In the rare occasions you two were like this, you would tend to draw patterns on his arm or leg. 

So he decided to finally return the favor. With the arm he had wrapped around you, he started to dance his fingertips over your upper arm. 

He felt you practically melt into him at the action. If you could get any closer to him, you did. 

He continued tracing your arm with an overwhelming amount of care. It made you consider his previous actions compared to how welcome you were now in his arms. 

“Spencer, I’m gonna ask you something, and I need you to be completely honest with me,” you spoke with a hidden hesitation in your voice. 

“Of course I’ll be honest to you. I always will be,” he furrowed his brows at the thought of you being scared of him lying to you. 

You let out a small, almost shaky breath. “Am I clingy?” you murmured. 

This made his hand on your arm stop. He shifted his sitting position so he could face you better but also didn’t want to let you out of his hold. 

“No, never,” he told you with assurance. “Why would you think you’re clingy?” 

He saw you hesitate once more before you gave him your reply. “I was just overthinking things. Worried I was taking the physical contact thing too far or that I’m a bit too affectionate at times.“

“Why would you be worried? You’d never take things too far. You’ve always been respectful of other people’s boundaries.” 

You sighed with a shaky breath. He could practically see through you and see you considering your response. 

“Because I thought I was making you uncomfortable.” you looked down to avoid his gaze. 

He was quiet for a second, absolutely baffled as to how you would think you could ever make him uncomfortable. “Why?” His question was a barely audible whisper.  

“You seemed different. All of a sudden you would freeze when I touched you. You became jumpy and skittish when I talked to you. I thought I was too much for you but you didn’t want to tell me about it.” 

You shifted away to face him and his hand fell from your arm. You fidgeted with the sleeves of your hoodie as your face went blank. 

“You could never be too much for me,” he spoke with a soft voice. He tried to reach his hand out to hold yours but your hand disappeared in your sleeve at his touch. 

“Then why were you different all of a sudden?” You narrowed your eyes at him. 

His cheeks started to turn pink, “I- I wasn’t.” 

“Yes you were.” 

“Y/N please,” he begged. 

“Spencer,” you whispered as your eyes bore into his. “You said you’d be honest with me.” 

He licked his lips and his face turned red. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He couldn’t find an escape route. He had no choice but to tell you. And once the flood gate opened, he would never be able to close it. 

“I was freaking out,” he blurted. 

“I was freaking out because Morgan implanted this idea in my head that you might possibly have feelings for me based on the way you act around me. I’ve been obsessed with that thought since he mentioned it. So I freaked out almost every time you touched me, talked to me, even looked at me,” he rambled on anxiously as he tried to explain himself. No holding back now. 

“I tried not to let it change my behavior but I guess it did and I am so sorry for that. I never wanted to give you the impression that I was uncomfortable. To be honest I don’t think you could ever make me uncomfortable” 

You were silent for a moment. He couldn’t read your reaction. Your eyebrows slightly raised with your lips parted. He could only see surprise, which was typical, he just didn’t know if this kind of surprise was good. 

“Why were you so obsessed with the idea of me having feelings for you?” 

He could’ve sworn his heart was going to beat out of his chest at any moment. 

“Because I think I’m falling in love with you.”

 Here we go. Flood gates. 

“The idea you might like me back became an all consuming thought because I never before thought it was possible and I never wanted to get my hopes up. Actually, I pretty much think about you all the time so it wasn’t that far from normal. ” 

“You’re falling in love with me?” you asked barely above a whisper. 

“Yes,” he spoke softly with full confidence. 

The only change to your appearance was your eyes widened a bit more. It made Spencer's heart sink to his stomach. 

“Listen, I understand if this makes things weird between us and I am so sorry. I just couldn’t ..��

He couldn't finish his thought, you were too busy locking your lips with his. It was a sweet but cautious kiss, almost as if you were testing the waters in uncharted territory. You felt him freeze against you so you leaned away, breaking from the kiss. 

Not even seconds later Spencer placed a hand on your face and was diving back into the kiss with fervor. You instantly reacted as your arms found their way around his neck and your hand was digging in his hair. The kiss was intoxicating. Both of you trying to get a taste of the other after what felt like eons of pinning. 

He wrapped his arms around your waist while his one hand snuck up to the small of your back where your hoodie had exposed your skin. It sent a shiver up your spine while you let out a shaky breath against his lips. You tried shifting in your seat to somehow get closer to him. With his hands against your waist he helped guide you to sit in his lap straddling him. 

When you finally break from the kiss your faces are red and Spencer rests his forehead against yours. You focus on the sound of his breath and the feeling of your heart practically beating in your ears. 

Your hand moves to play with the hairs at the nape of his neck. “I guess I didn’t do a very good job at showing I had feelings for you.” 

The corners of his mouth lift up into a giddy smile. “No, you did. I’m just oblivious.”

“Sounded like you were in denial,” you lightly teased. 

“That too,” he chuckles. 

After a moment of enjoying each other's presence, you pull away from him just far enough to look him in the eyes. 

“I know I call everyone pet names, but every time I used them with you, I wanted it to mean something more. Part of me would always hope you would one day call me those names back,” 

Spencer swore his heart could give out at any second. He never expected to hear this from you and it made him lightheaded.

“This may sound childish but.. I never craved attention so badly, until you gave me yours,” you added. 

He licked his lips and smiled. With his hands still on your waist he traced mindless patterns at your sides. “You have my complete and undivided attention, my love.”

His words made you giddy. You bit your lip to keep yourself from giggling. Although, he would never be opposed to hearing your beautiful laugh. 

There were no words to describe the way that you felt. So without thinking, you leaned forward once more to capture his lips with yours. 

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Tag Requests: @nomajdetective

[presidentlokis-hornyhelmet]

Holding On

Pairing: Pavitr Prabhakar x gn!reader Summary: You had been his first -first friend, first crush, first kiss, first person to know his alter-ego.. You had been his everything and he lost you. Warnings: Major Character Death, Depression, Grief/Mourning, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Angst, Jealousy (pt 2 to "Six Feet's Never Felt So Far" but can be read as a standalone too)

Also read on ao3

🎶🎵 I'm still holding on to everything that's dead and gone Here I am alone, between the heavens and the embers 🎶🎵 In The Stars by Benson Boone

Pavitr clutched your photo tightly in his hands and hugged it to his chest, tears streaming down his face as he stared blankly at the ceiling. The sound of the fan was the only indicator of life in the room. His eyes caught on it's dizzying rotation, face stoic and expressionless. His heart wasn't broken, it was ripped out of his chest and burnt right before his eyes. 

It'd been six months, but to Pavitr, Y/n's death felt like only yesterday. 

Pavitr had refused to believe your were gone. He even went about seeming unaffected or "moved on" but in reality, it was just denial. Deny, deny and keep denying. Until the 13th day ritual of Preta Karma -a ceremony where rites are performed in honour of the late family member and prayers are done. 

He broke down, refusing to attend the ceremony. He was only invited as Y/n's best friend as their relationship had been a secret -known to none else except Gayatri- which hurt even more. 

And, in the months that followed, Pavitr had refused to leave his room unless it was for school or superheroing, grieving and mourning your love in silence. 

He tried to distract himself with Spider-Man-ing through Mumbattan, as Gayatri suggested, but ultimately failed. It felt like a chore now that you were gone. 

"Y/n will always be with us in spirit, Pavi. What would N/n think if they saw you like this? You know, they would want you to be happy.. not, not destroy yourself." 

It was true what Gayatri had said, Pavitr was destorying himself mentally and physically by skipping meals or over eating, playing Benson Boone's In The Stars in an endless loop as he laid on his bed and stared at the ceiling passively. 

You had been the light in his darkness after the death of Uncle Bhim. Back then he dealt his uncle's death the same way: starvation, overeating, locking himself in his room and refusing to interact. 

It was you who reached through the dark web he'd woven around himself and pulled him out, helped him through his guilt and depression. 

"How long are you going to stay like this, lying in your room and staring at the fan?" 

He moved not a muscle, but you knew he was listening. 

"You know, Pavu, uncle Bhim would hate to see you this way."

Still no reply. You sighed and combed your fingers through his hair, pulling his hair in a soothing motion. He turned his face in your lap, eyes sore and dry as dull brown orbs greeted yours. His face was blank and devoid of emotion as if he lost the will to live. 

This won't do. 

This boy had to get up and move on; even Maya aunty was concerned. She had accepted her husband's death and come to terms a while later, but Pavitr stubbornly refused to let go. 

You caught his gaze, gently leaning into him. When he made no notion to move, you pressed your lips to his, kissing him softly. 

Pavitr was slow to realize you were kissing him but when he eventually caught it, he reciprocated fervently. 

You pulled away, breathing hard. His eyes opened slowly, watching you with dilated pupils. 

"You... kissed me." 

"Yeah..", you blushed slightly, "I.. I hated seeing you down in the dumps.. you really need to move on, Pavu. Bhim uncle wouldn't want you to look so sad." 

"You kissed me." 

"Yeah, I did- but, please, don't think I'm taking advantage of you", you add quickly. 

He knows you didn't; he knows you better than he knows himself. 

"Pavu, you need to get up and get back. I'm not asking you to become the Old Pavitr, but I want you to accept Uncle Bhim's death and move on. I know it's hard, but promise me you'll try." 

The fact you were crushing on him went over his head at that moment, but he had plenty of time to realize it later. 

Though his smile didn't fully reach his eyes, you were content with any reaction other than blankness. Baby steps. 

"I will try, N/n." For you. 

You hardly expected the drastic change. Pavitr got up early the next day, showered, did laundry, recited prayer and left the room. When you came to check on him later, you found him doing chores around the house, his room spick and span. Uncle Bhim's photo on the wall was neatly adorned with flowers and incense sticks, to your delight. Maya aunty was so happy and silently thanked you. 

He kept his long hair as you suggested, as a sign of growth and to never forget what the past taught him. For Bhim Uncle. 

It was the first ever you saw him smile after Uncle Bhim's demise. And, maybe you didn't know, but it was because of you: his sun. 

Pavitr rolled over on the bed, clutching the framed photo to his chest and stared at your bright orbs in the picture. It was taken on his birthday last year. 

You had begun to spend more time with Hari Oberoi recently and it was nagging Pavitr. He knew you guys were just as much as friends as he and Hari were, and he knew you only had platonic feelings for him, but jealousy reared it's ugly head. 

It's been a week and you have refused to spend more than fifteen minutes alone with him and he was getting increasingly anxious. 

Did you not like him anymore? Did you suddenly realize you have feelings for Hari? Are you going to break up with him? Is that why you won't hang out with him anymore, to let him down gently? 

A million questions plaguing his mind and everytime he saw Hari with his arm around you, he felt lost, betrayed and jealous. Hari was stealing you from him. 

"Who are you texting, Y/n?", he asked the next time you met, eating pani puri from a street vendor. 

Had you been aware, you would've noticed him not calling you the usual nickname. 

"No one." 

His heart broke into peices, because isn't that what you say when you're seeing some one else? 

He was just about to ask you the same when you stood up from your table and paid for your snack, asking him to meet you later that evening on your usual spot before disappearing into the crowd. 

It was confirmed. You were breaking up. 

The whole afternoon, Pavitr talked to himself on the different ways he'd convince you, eventually giving up and deciding to just accept it. 

It was half-past the time you had agreed to meet when Pavitr got dressed and put on somewhat decent clothes. He opened the door of his room, sad and hopeless, only to be greeted by Hari holding a giant cake. Maya aunty, you and Gayatri were standing beside him, popping confetti on him as he stepped outside. 

Oh, heck. He'd completely forgotten. 

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LOSER!", you all yell as Maya aunty shot you a playfully disapproving look. 

You collide onto him in an embrace, subtly kissing his cheek as you whisper in his ear. "Happy birthday, baby." 

He hugged you tightly as Hari and Gayatri joined in, Maya aunty flashing pics as his face was smeared in cream. 

He wasn't losing you, after all! 

Pavitr's nails dug into the frame and it breaks under his spider strength. Tears rush down his cheeks on their own as he cries harder, gritting his teeth in guilt and kicking himself.

You had been his first -first friend, first crush, first kiss, first person to know his alter-ego.. and the first to make him question his existence. 

You had been his everything and he lost you. 

________

Hope you liked it! :)) reblogs and comments feed my fic dragon uwu

[cloveroctobers]

Richie Jerimovich — summer prompts 🍋

A/N: Love that most of y’all are coming around when it comes to Richie but what’s understood doesn’t need to be explained! Anyways after watching this eye-opening season, it was easy to be inspired for this piece so I hope you enjoy this.

SYNOPSIS: Richie’s found his purpose and doesn’t want to reflect on the past (much) but is looking towards a better future…which may include baby steps to outsiders but it means everything to him.

WARNINGS: language ofc it’s the bear & me we’re talking about, mentions of drugs & anxiety, mentions of slight sexual themes, and a little heaviness but mostly two goof balls expressing their love for each together.

Decided to throw a prompt into the mix as well so I’m using: “can we make cookies?” “it is 92 degrees outside, no!” 

*GIF BELONGS TO: @p3iyin9 *

꒰ ° ꒱** ༉‧₊˚✧ ↝ ꒰ ° ꒱** ༉‧₊˚✧ ↝ ꒰ ° ꒱** ༉‧₊˚✧ ↝ ꒰ ° ꒱**

[July 10th]

[4 months, 14 days later…]

It’s her birthday and she’s here.

She’s not alone and Richie’s half expecting her to be here with some new guy, some guy that’s more around her age and has their shit together. It’s a bitter thought to have but he can’t lie and say that it didn’t occur, the constant insecurity of not being good enough.

He knows it’s his own fault, he’s the one who pushed her away not long after she welcomed him between her thighs during a brutal winter. The details were vivid even with his eyes wide open, burning into space. He wanted to be angry being so intimate with someone else when there was always the thought of his first love on his mind.

Tiffany.

His ex-wife.

He was still hurting from being officially divorced for about a year now (separated for three) and she was moving on he learned. It was bound to happen, a woman with a heart like her’s? Richie wasn’t sure why he was still holding on to hope for them to rekindle their relationship. He wanted it to work but he was the constant screw up and Tiffany deserved better…he just didn’t expect it to be with some construction owning guy named Frank.

Richie already didn’t trust him.

It was the common tale of curing a broken heart, trying to get underneath someone else to get over someone, to feel anything else but the continuing ache that sat on the left side of his chest.

Freya Mazari was someone Richie met not long after “the thing with Tiff,” happened, outside of a bar that was famous for bourbon and risqué wall art. He spotted her outside at the start of summer on a surprisingly quiet sidewalk cracking her knuckles—out of a possible bad habit, blue bruise the side of an apple on her cheek, and a unlit spliff tapping against her thigh afterwards as she seemed to be mumbling some lyrics to a Busta Rhymes song.

That was the first thing that had him sold on their soon growing friendship.

Freya’s surrounded by a group of diverse women who are laughing it up over drinks while Freya is standing; embracing Sugar and falling into smile-filled chatter with the blonde. Richie instantly feels a pull to head over there himself but be figures he can just get entail from Sugar later. Carmy’s been over to Freya’s table already, handing out a, “it’s on the house,” birthday special but they still weren’t on the best terms really. It was strictly business now and that was something Richie never wanted to be part of.

A strict relationship with a family member—except for uncle Jimmy of course, he really had no choice with that one. That night back on opening day in May, seemed to be something they couldn’t get pass just yet and that was another hard pill for Richie to swallow.

Carmy messing up something good on the surface level and taking it out on everybody else with his mouth, changed the trajectory of their relationship.

Would it be forever? Richie couldn’t tell you.

Nonetheless he wasn’t here at the bear to talk about need-a-diaper carmy. Right now? He needed to figure out how to handle this…this distance with the woman he considered his close friend.

He’ll deal with that family shit in due time, don’t worry.

“Who are we hiding from?” A familiar voice causes Richie to clench his eyes shut.

He doesn’t have to peer down at the shorter tatted man who’s behind him as he says, “I’m not hiding from nobody.”

“Really? Because it looks like you’re creeping on…Freya! Yeah Freya over there. Do you know it’s her birthday today? We had the best birthday hug, she may even be a better hugger than me.” Fak informs the taller blue eyed tux wearing man.

Richie pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance, “of course I know its her—what did I tell you about touching things that don’t belong to you?”

He battled with himself countless of times this entire morning to call her up but ultimately fought against himself to just do it.

Fak hummed, “hey, she’s my friend too! And doesn’t belong to either of us but we’re included in her life and it’s her birthday! I’m sure she’ll be happy to receive a birthday wish from you too.”

“I can’t say I agree with you on that.”

“Why not? Oh…it’s because you guys did the dance with no pants—

Richie’s hands immediately slaps over the animated man’s mouth and starts talking to him calmly, “what did I say? To not ever mention that shit here at the original bear.”

That’s Richie’s new spin on the restaurant name, yes there are shirts on the way!

Patience is key.

Fak hummed as Richie scolded him. It wasn’t that big of a deal in the first place on Fak’s side of things. He was just thrilled that Richie was involved in being intimate with someone he cared about for once…compared to the others that shall not be named. Fak thought Freya and Richie could be something great but he wasn’t aware what Richie was so scared of.

“Yuck! Did you just lick my hand you—

Richie shook his hand about, halting himself from saying something insulting. Sometimes it just slipped out but he was doing much better and it was usually a place out of love when it came to Fak. He was like a puppy in training, always excited and doing whatever came to mind but most of the time you had to lure him to take a fucking nap.

“Yeah I did! Just go talk to her! Make her dreams come true.”

“Fuck are you talking about? Do I look like Hall & Oates to you? Like I’m her dream guy or somethin’?”

“Hey, I thought we weren’t doing this. I don’t like you talking down on yourself buddy! You need to go into the restroom and give yourself a quick pep talk in the mirror.” Fak ordered, pointing in the direction of the restrooms.

Richie blew out a raspberry at Fak’s encouragement. He didn’t take him serious but once the man started shoving him about, Richie was all elbows flying and slap-fight inflicting between the two.

Sydney calls from the kitchen, “Hey! What’re you two doing? Aren’t you supposed to be up front?”

“Sugar’s up front.” Richie informs with a slight turn to face the braided woman.

Fak immediately straightens up, not providing much answers, “Yes ma’am! I mean chef.”

Sydney blinks at the two, wondering why they’re not moving, leaving Fak to take a few deep breaths before slapping Richie on the chest as he mutters, “Taking one for the team again! You’re welcome and get it together!”

“Don’t tell me what to do, Fak.”

Fak shrugs his shoulders and spins to leave the entry way of the kitchen, while the pace of the kitchen has started to slow down the movements are still precise. It’s late, after ten pm and there’s about three to five parties left, which means closing time should be wrapping up within the next thirty to forty-five minutes.

Business was booming still almost two months later but the rush always seemed to slow down once the late nights arrived. The Bear was formerly known as mainly a lunch or late lunch spot but after this new reno, dinner became much more important.

“Richie,” Sydney steps away from her spot behind the stand, “Everything good?”

Richie exhales as he mutters, “Freya’s out there.”

“I heard.”

He fidgets then.

“Have you talked to her? It’s her birthday.”

“I’m aware, I put in the word for Marcus to give her a little piece of home since I also hear she’s a little homesick. Mkhabez.” Sydney tells Richie, as she eyes the jittery man.

Richie chews on his fingernail in thought, “right that’s some type of cookie. Almond cookie? She told me about how her uh, Jidda used to make them for her as a little girl with her siblings back in Algeria.”

Sydney nodded her head, “yeah…are you okay?”

“Huh?”

“Not to be an asshole but you look like you’re gonna pass out or hurl and if you are, please give me a fair warning so you don’t ruin my coat.” Sydney cautiously took a step back as Richie used the back of his hand to wipe at the beads of sweat on his forehead and not because of the heat in the kitchen.

Richie scoffs, “No need to worry, Chef. I’m not gonna empty my belly or pop a smooth criminal lean. I don’t know why I’m feeling this way. I probably need to pop another xan.”

“Uh, that’s probably something you shouldn’t mention to me.”

“Why? You’re not gonna snitch on me, are you?”

“No…but I might snoop through your stuff and fry them all in a pan.” Sydney honestly says while she folds her arms as Richie peers at her.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I could,” Sydney challenged, “if you need a minute take it but you can’t run forever.”

“Who says I’m runnin’?”

“It’s pretty obvious,” Sydney states, “and you just need to rip whatever this is off like a band aid, you’ll feel better afterwards.”

“And what if I don’t?”

Sydney pauses with her arms still folded before she peeks around at the remaining chefs in the kitchen, Carmy not in sight before she whispers back up at him, “then fuck it, at least you tried.”

Richie can’t help but to snort out some laughter before he claps two hands down on Sydney’s shoulders, giving them a squeeze, “Well thanks for that, Syd.”

“Sure, whatever. Now get out of my kitchen.”

“Our!” Richie points.

Sydney nods her head from side to side with a playful roll of her eyes as Richie clicks his tongue at her. Down the hall he goes in search of the bathroom to in fact, give himself a pep talk but most importantly to calm down.

Richie’s disappeared for over half an hour. He didn’t realize it until Carmy barged in to see him sitting on the bathroom sink.

“I said I’m in here!”

“Yeah, with your ass in the sink.” Carmy’s tone is monotone but quick to point out, “which is unsanitary by the way.”

Richie can’t help but to roll his eyes as he hops off then, fixing his tux before he slaps his face, bringing himself out his daze. He spins back around, getting another good look at his reflection for what felt like the thousandth time but he exhales and quietly excuses himself from around Carmy who appears as if he wants to say more.

But he doesn’t.

Richie’s steps echo in his ears as he circles around to the dining area. He hasn’t realized how long he locked himself away until he’s in the room, half of the chairs flipped up onto the tables with lofi music playing through the speakers.

He can only guess who picked this shit.

A blonde pregnant lady probably.

“Damn.” Richie rubs at his mouth in frustration, briefly noticing the booth Freya previously sat in was now empty.

That didn’t lift the weight to now know that she was gone for the night. In fact it made him feel worse, that he didn’t have the nerve to just walk up to her and talk.

You know? like friends were supposed to be able to do.

His skin is red as he pinches at it in aggravation, until he picks up on the sound of heels slowly clacking against the floor. His breathing hitches as he lifts his head to meet Freya’s dark sharp eyes.

“Hey,” Richie chest feels tight but he breathes, “I thought you scrammed outta here with your girls.”

She shakes her head as she keeps some distance between the two, “some of them have early mornings tomorrow and the rest I told to just go home. I was hoping to run into you actually.”

Richie swallows as she steps forward, “why? To smash some cake in my face?”

“Now there’s an idea.” She lightly laughs and it sounds like Christmas bells, “but no, I wanted to see you.”

Richie quirked up a brow as he carefully moved out of the way so Freya could grab her things, “…really?”

“Yeah, we have some things to talk about.” Freya slips her bag over her shoulder, “Like you ghosting me for one.”

Richie rolls his head up to the ceiling, “yeah, about that—

“Let’s go for a late night walk.”

“How about a late night drive since I know your feet are hurting or about to be soon,” Richie looks at Freya’s fit, knowing she wasn’t much of a heels wearing woman (although she wears them very well) preferring sneakers more than anything on her feet.

Freya laughs as she sways a bit, probably a little tipsy, “you’re not wrong about that…so get your keys and take me to yours.”

“Mine,” Richie questions while pointing to himself, “I dunno what kinda guy you take me for—

“Oh Shut up, I’m not giving you any of this birthday cake.” She poses in her fitted dress, “I’m only propositioning a conversation between Richard and the birthday girl.”

“Yeah you giving this a whole title isn’t helping the innuendo, baby.”

“And neither are you in that tux,” Freya smoothes down the arm of it before placing her hands back on the strap of her bag, “Didn’t get the chance to tell you last time face to face but you clean up very nice, Richard.”

Richie gives a grin as he says, “Give me two minutes.”

Which leads to the pair pulling up to Richie’s condo/apartment. It’s normally too quiet at night for his liking, especially when he’s not jamming out with Eva here. After unlocking the front door, he holds his arm out for Freya to lead the way, which she has no issue doing, a natural sway in her steps as she walks down the foyer bare footed now.

“I’ll put the AC on.” Richie rushes out as Freya makes herself at home, placing her shoes against the couch and plopping down on the couch with a sigh.

He messes around with the finicky thermostat until it chokes out some cool air from the vents in the ceiling above, battling against the humidity in his two bedroom home.

“What can I get you? I’ve got beer, Gatorade, tap and—

“Orange juice?” Freya asks as she lays down on the couch, one arm is held up and over her head, eyes closed for a moment.

“Yeah I’ve got that too,” Richie responds from around the corner in his kitchen.

It’s about ten minutes until eleven and Freya is all yawns as Richie arrives back into the living room, holding two red cups, one filled with ice and OJ just how Freya likes it and one just filled with the orange liquid. He sits down beside her as she sits up and moves over to give the man some room in his own house.

She’s gulping the cold juice down and licks at the top of her lip before placing it down on the side table, “you need coasters.”

“Ah, just use some toilet paper.”

Freya crinkles her nose, pressing her fist into the side of her head as she rests back against the couch, just eyeing Richie who is looking forward at everything else but her. The cold air is wheezing but there’s relief filling the room, in contrast to what Richie maybe feeling.

“This silence is killing me, Richard!” Freya pokes his thigh with her seashell painted toe, “just talk to me already, will you?”

“Okay…how’s the birthday going?”

Freya honestly says, “I’m a little sad my mum didn’t call.”

That gets Richie to look at Freya then. Although their friendship was still fairly new, he knew that seemed unlikely for Freya’s mother out in North London to forget her eldest’ birthday. Of course it was possible, Richie didn’t have the best relationship with his own neglectful mother, hasn’t spoken to her in years or knows where she even fucked off to but it seemed like Freya at least communicated with her mother across the ocean on a daily basis.

“Has your brother or sister been in contact with her?”

“Oh yeah, she was in the background on FaceTime with my sister. Not even a hello but it’s probably because I told her I couldn’t send her any money a few weeks ago. Whatever.” Freya shrugs her shoulders.

She was a dental hygienist assistant and didn’t care for her job much but the pay and benefits were decent enough in this economy.

Freya was originally born in Algiers to a father that worked in labor and manufacturing while her mother was a stay at home mom, mostly due to a disability she faced as a child. Money wasn’t the best growing up so it wasn’t until Freya was about twelve when her father moved her, her mother, and her baby sister to London where they stayed with Freya’s maternal aunt for a few months until they got into their own flat. Her brother stayed with her father for awhile until they soon started making their visits.

Eventually her father decided to let the brother stay there while he continued making money and hoping for better work in London. However there were a few opportunities but it seemed like Freya’s father kept turning it down, just to find out he was participating in extramarital affairs behind her mother’s back. Not long after that, her mother stepped up to work with aching joints at a sporting goods store to provide for her three kids.

Freya as the eldest was also used to working underneath the table so it was no different in the UK. She learned quickly how to provide for her family too.

After that they learned her father had fallen ill due to his diabetes and needed his leg amputated. When Freya was twenty-one and living in Toronto with a boyfriend, he was living in London with his sister-in-law and died from congestive heart failure. Freya’s upbringing wasn’t always so cloudy, there were sweet moments with her parents that she liked to hold dear to her heart but the reality is, you’ll always bring something from your childhood into your adulthood good or bad.

“I’m sorry. That sucks ass forreal.” Richie comments and Freya just deeply inhales.

“You know what else sucks?” She exhales, “Not having you around to talk to.”

Richie presses his elbows into his knees in thought, “I uh—I’m sorry about that too. I didn’t mean to, what did you say back at the spot? Ghost you? Yeah. I didn’t mean to do that, I was just dealing with some shit inside that didn’t really have anything to do with you.”

“So the sex wasn’t trash and I didn’t scare you off?”

“What? Are you kidding?!” Richie’s wide-eyed as he quickly looks back at Freya, who’s face is full of a smirk, that it makes the dent on the center of her chin more prominent.

He soon laughs, “you’re fucken annoying you know that?”

“I’m supposed to be. You’ve met your match,” Freya winks.

“It—I’m gonna be real with you. I panicked because it was you on top of—it was you—and not just some random one night stand. With those I never really felt anything unfortunately for me but with you—

“It was like the Fourth of July-ly-ly.”

Richie scoffs and rolls his eyes, “I’m all here for your confidence in my skills truly but shut up.”

Who was being annoying now? She was clearly talking about herself but whatever floats this man’s boat—which she already knew—BUT she’ll save you guys the details.

“I’ve been quiet for months and I’m just trying to help fill in the gaps, sheesh!” Freya flicks her black parted hair back over her shoulders.

Richie shakes his head at the thirty something year old woman who didn’t mind rambling even when she wasn’t tipsy.

“It’s just you know, I didn’t think I would ever feel something again after the d—the thing with tiff.”

Richie still couldn’t say it, although Tiffany was officially steering her life in the direction of a another man. He still couldn’t say “divorce” because then that would mean he would have to start his own healing of a end of a special era with a woman he deeply loved and created a precious life with.

It just fizzled out and damn it hurt.

“And you did with me,” Freya voiced and was understanding, “glad to know that wasn’t only one sided.”

Richie finds himself asking, “Did you tell that no good locked up son of a bitch about it?”

Freya’s ex was some abusive guy that landed himself in jail right after New Years and it wasn’t for him stalking, harassing, or hitting Freya. It was from attempted armed robbery and now he was serving time for it and Freya finally felt like she could breathe for once.

Richie knew the feeling of being held back.

Counting your breaths are actually helpful, shout-out to anger management!

“No. Did you?”

“That jagoff can choke!”

“I mean, did you tell Tiffany?”

“Fuck no! I needed to see how we were feeling about it first and it’s not like she tells me her every move—besides her getting engaged to some other guy.” Richie’s almost glaring now at the fact of the matter before fixing his tone some, “Which I guess she gets points for letting me know and if the bastard is gonna be around my kid full-time.”

Freya spoke, “You just never thought there would be someone else. I get it.”

“Never! For either of us, then you came along and then came Frank and it’s a constant loop of emotions but I’m happy to be in Eva’s life and to feel something other than dread when I step into the original bear.” Richie’s plucking his nail against the plastic cup, slightly anxious at being this vulnerable.

However Freya wasn’t one to judge much, sure she had her opinions and can get loud from time to time when she’s pissed off or passionate but she was usually open to hearing all perspectives before she said her peace. Richie’s view was not one she spoke much on, she listened, really listened like he needed someone to and offered words when it was time for him to hear them.

“That’s something to look forward to.”

“Yeah but I still miss you.” Richie rubbed at his face before saying, “I miss our friendship and I don’t know what to do about us after what we did…yet somethin’ inside is telling me that nows not really the time to be jumping into anything. I’m just figuring things out and I know that’s gotta count for something.”

“Which is fine, richie!” Freya says with a light shove to his shoulder, “I wasn’t chasing you down to force you to be with me or anything! I gave you the space you clearly needed. I know we both got our own shit to deal with but being with you helps put that on pause for awhile …even if it’s as friends. I’m here whenever you need me, you wanna vent and scream about shit, have at it. You don’t wanna talk? Let’s have a dance party instead. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I’ve got two, take your pick!”

Richie snorts at this but he honestly appreciates it. He almost forgot what it felt like to have a friend.

“Just don’t cancel me out for months at a time, and expect things to be normal without a conversation, you hear me you prick? I’m your friend, you can talk to me ya know? I want you to feel safe with me, confide in me.” Freya holds Richie’s navy eyes against her ink colored ones and Richie has to slap a hand over his mouth to hold back a sob.

Richie chokes out, “ugh! Why are you making me feel things?!”

“Because it’s cancer season and I love and respect our friendship. You held me down in my lowest and I’m gonna keep uplifting you during yours and your growth.” Freya places a hand over the one that’s resting on Richie’s own knee.

Freya goes on, “It’s not our time to be romantically involved and I’m quite okay with that but that doesn’t mean I suddenly stop caring for you.”

Richie pressed his chin into his shoulder, staring at her underneath his lashes, “Wow…you sure you don’t wanna make-out just to confirm that?”

“I knew you liked how I look in this dress.” Freya playfully runs her nails through his buzzed hair, “say it back though, tell me you care just as much.”

There’s that “words of affirmation” shit people talk about right? Garrett would probably find this amusing.

He gently rests a rough hand against her cheek, “You know I do but I’m gonna say it anyways since you wanna be mushy as fuck right now. Thanks for everything and coming into my life, I care a lot about you and us. Your heart is beautiful and you’re my friend who also happens to be a total smoke show! I know you must feel amazing in that dress, you wear it well.”

“Thanks, good looking!” She winks.

“Act like you know,” Richie smirks.

“Oh, please!”

Richie hyped himself up with a roll of his shoulders, “Look good, feel good.”

They share a laugh staring at each other with Freya balled up beside him and Richie just enjoying her company. He wasn’t sure what to make of this but he didn’t have to have all the answers tonight. This Freya also confirmed.

He was just happy to be around her again and to have her be part of his journey.

She pops up then, “Can we make cookies?”

“Didn’t you just have some back at the restaurant?” Richie asks before saying, “It’s 92 degrees outside, no!”

“That was much earlier, though.” Freya argues, eyes darting to the side as she thinks about it.

It really was a lovely day to spend her birthday, although she wasn’t on a boat somewhere in Monaco or Miami…it was a somewhat chill day.

“Didn’t you already have some cookies at the restaurant?”

He knew she was a hungry drunk but she was nowhere near drunk, shockingly on her day.

“So? If you don’t know how to make some basic chocolate chip cookies just say that.”

Richie scoffed, “What?! Who said that? I make the best got damn cookies ever, just ask Eva.”

“She’s probably sleeping?”

“…fuck, you’re right.”

He definitely would have called her up if it wasn’t passed her bedtime.

“Well? What’re you waiting for?” She kicks his thigh again.

Richie pressed his forehead against Freya’s as he hollered, “Game on, Queen Elizabeth!”

“Don’t you ever!” She tapped his jaw and pointed at him.

Richie moved his jaw along blinking, “I’m sorry! I forgot.”

Thats how the late night evening included making homemade cookies, with Richie hovering over his phone trying to read off ingredients to Freya as they made a mess of his kitchen.

“Where’s the dark chocolate?” Freya searched Richie’s cabinets and drawers while Richie tried to keep his eyes away from the kitchen door, where he had Freya propped up against with him down on his knees.

“What? I said salt?” Richie’s eyes followed the woman as she moved around the kitchen as if she were being timed, “I dunno where the hell you got dark chocolate from.”

“We can do dark chocolate since it’s superior and a pinch of sea salt?”

Lines appeared against the skin of Richie’s forehead as he raised his brows, “How about hell no, Betty Crocker?”

“Who made you the number one cookie critic?” Freya gibed as she gently closed the drawers shut with her hips.

Richie taunts, “your mother!”

Middle fingers and a sarcastic smile later were handed right over to the 6’1 man, “Piss off, Richard!”

“Well…whadda want to do? Eva and I ate up all the last of the candy I had here. She might be coming to see you soon actually but don’t tell tiff that if you happen to see her, alright?” Richie slaps the palms of his hands against his kitchen counter.

Freya let’s out a dramatic sigh as she begins pacing on her side of the counter. She stops to lean her elbows against the counter and looks at the plastic large bowl in front of richie. Still sighing Freya reaches over to use the smaller spoon that was off to the side to dip into the batter.

Hey, Freya was no baker or chef but she liked looking at the consistency and details of things. Turning it to show to Richie, she takes one finger and flicks the spoon back so the batter can fling forward and stick right on Richie’s nose.

She’s cackling at the image of Richie closing his eyes shut in disbelief. His tongue goes out then to lick some of it off before swiping it away with his fingertips. He stares hard at a laughing Freya, who has her head thrown back, hugging herself while Richie is focused on his next move.

He’s carefully taking his jacket off now, smoothing it down before using his long limbs to toss it over at the dining table top on his right. Freya doesn’t notice this as she’s wiping the corners of her wing-lined eyes, still closed as she’s almost snorting now, skin of her nostrils sinking in a bit, like she’s squidward or some shit as she carries on laughing.

“You think you’re so funny don’t you?” Richie asks with a palm full of flour now.

She’s still laughing as she nods her head, too full of giggles to get any words out.

Instead of Richie sprinkling some salt, he throws flour across the counter right to the side of Freya’s face, “Well I’m funnier, asshole!”

That gets Freya to stop laughing then. She stands up straight and it’s Richie’s turn to fail to cover his own laughter with his fist.

It was on then.

A flour fight began between the two friends, coating most of the kitchen with white powder.

“I think you threw salt in my eye you turd?!” Freya’s holding her eye now, after this has gone on for at least ten minutes.

“Shit, I’m sorry! Everything is starting to look the same.” Richie’s coming to her aide now, fanning the air as he steps to her, hands reaching for her forearms, “let me see.”

Freya fools him, “Gotcha!” Before whacking him in the neck with a whisk.

“Ow! Hey you’re fighting dirty, Frey!” Richie scolds before snatching a wooden spoon making Freya eye him wildly, “uh huh let me see you try to win this battle now.”

“I’m definitely gonna win, whether you like it not, Richy Rich.” Freya got low, ready to aim at Richie’s torso since she had that to her advantage being shorter than him.

Richie blows a raspberry, tapping the wooden spoon against the palm of his hand, “you must not know the strength of a wooden spoon and my wrestling skills, sweetheart. I got the team to championships!”

“When? In 1948?”

Richie tightens his eyes at this before they’re in a fencing match now. Which doesn’t last long as one of the two lost their footing due to the flour covered floor.

“I think I broke my ass.” Richie groans holding his back.

Freya’s laughing again as she’s resting right on top of Richie, “I’m glad I don’t have that problem, flat ass.”

“I don’t appreciate you slandering what I lack, some of us weren’t blessed okay?” Richie sasses as he wraps a hand around Freya’s waist to sit them both up.

Freya cooed at him, pinching his cheeks while Richie rolls his eyes. They sit in silence with freya on his lap as they take in the sight of his kitchen now. Flour on the upper cabinets, flour even on Eva’s personal drawing table, flour of course covering the counter, flour all over the floor, hair, face and their clothes.

“Great…now I gotta clean this up!”

“Eh, maybe later yeah?”

“Later? Well what else do you have in mind since we didn’t actually make those cookies you wanted so bad?” Richie waved his hands about.

Freya makes an explosion in front of Richie’s face, his round eyes following her fingertips for a moment before she says close to his face, “I have a better idea, it’s actually a good one.”

Richie was half expecting Freya to get him to break out into a dance routine like last time to Madonna’s, “Material girl,” but he was sure the man above was probably tired of their shenanigans tonight.

So that’s how he ended up here, covered in flour with him watching as Freya made herself comfortable on his couch again, head pressed against her folded up hands.

One eye pops open almost like a jumpscare, “are you gonna stand there the entire night like a creeper and just watch me sleep or are you going to join me, Richie Lawrence?”

Richie scratches at his head in confusion, “stop with the whole middle-name name drop, you’re making me think of my bastard dad. And I’m not sure what you want me to do here?”

“Make yourself comfortable, it’s your house.”

“There’s a bed on the other side and a shower…”

“So you’re gonna make more suggestions on my birthday but then say respectfully a romantic relationship isn’t what you want out of this on my birthday? It sounds like you want to give me a certain gift on my birthday to end this birthday party.” Freya rambles, now sitting up on her elbow.

Richie squints, “how many times did you just say birthday?”

“Get over here!”

“God, you’re getting bossy in your old age.” Richie jokes as he sits down by Freya’s legs, who swings them to the floor so Richie can scoot in behind her.

He keeps his hands and feet where he can see them, staring at the back of Freya’s head and he can smell her sweet but floral scent. Richie takes the time to digest how this feels, with Freya in front of him radiating off a comforting warmth even when she snatches his arm to rest against her waist.

Richie is just waiting then for the anxiety to kick in but it doesn’t arrive for the rest of the night. Which makes him sink further into the couch, tightening his hold of Freya. His nose then presses down into her bare soft shoulder blade, right where her round mole sits and exhales.

“I’m proud of you.” Freya croaks out, ready for sleep, “and you should be too.”

And that makes Richie’s heart swell. He always wanted to be good at something but wasn’t sure how to make a career out of it. He had to find his footing in this world constantly and slowly he felt like he was beginning to locate it. They say it’s in your daily routine if you’re unsure and engaging with all sorts of people was something richie didn’t mind being part of.

It felt natural to him.

Holding Freya felt just the same but she didn’t need to know that just yet. He loved physical touch whether you were his family or not, it was the best form of love Richie wanted to give and receive.

He didn’t realize he squeezed her tighter against him at her words before he presses a kiss to the back of her head, “Happy birthday.”

A smile graces her lips.

In the early hours of July 11th, the sky a faded dim blue begins to peak through Richie’s living room curtains, revealing that a new day was among them.

Richie’s always been a early riser since sleep hardly existed according to the bags underneath his eyes. It had to be around 5 in the morning and he knew he would be ready for some coffee soon but this time he enjoys the silence. He feels Freya roll back against him, arm looping around his neck as she stretches in her sleep.

“Morning to you too,” Richie greets, “Question for ya, how’s bell-pep the iguana doin’?”

You heard that right, Freya was a “Guana-momma,” who she named after a vegetable specifically and Richie was ready to baby sit the guy at any time—as long as it didn’t freak Eva out too much but he doubted that. She had his blood in her veins.

Freya shushed him straight away, removing her arm from around his neck to curl that same arm to press the back of her fingers against his lips, “When I step up in the place, ayo, I step correct.” She starts before moving those fingers to create a wave up in the air.

It only made sense to Richie for her to be rounding off lyrics early in the morning, especially when he was asking questions and she wasn’t sure if she even knew her name just yet.

“Woo-hah, got them all in check.” Richie proceeds, head lifting a little to see if Freya’s eyes were even open as she rounded off lyrics.

Freya concludes, “Go to sleep.”

Enough said.

“I’ll try.”

The sight of flour sticky limbs entangled between two reconnected friends on another summer’s day went like this: cheek pressed against her’s, his facial hair pricking her skin which she didn’t seem to mind as snores actually escaped Richie’s lips, with his hand gripping Freya’s that was clutched to her own chest as their bodies gently rose in deep slumber.

The cares of the outside world were put on hold once more and Richie envisioned that this must be what heaven felt like. Nothing but a bit of light right in front of his eyes or in his arms to lead the way.

Cheers to some fucking clarity!

Sorry for the foul language dude or person or divine power up there…but Richie was thankful for it all.

꒰ ° ꒱** ༉‧₊˚✧ ↝ ꒰ ° ꒱** ༉‧₊˚✧ ↝ ꒰ ° ꒱** ༉‧₊˚✧ ↝ ꒰ ° ꒱**

Continue along with my summer anthology prompts here.

-> Part two!

[arielstruggles]

EVER SINCE MY BABY WENT AWAY IT'S BEEN THE BLACKEST DAY

CHAPTER 2

Pairing: Javier P x reader

Summary: After spending quite an enjoyable night, things go sideways. Who knows what is gonna happen next :)

Word count: 2.5 k

Warnings: smut (+18), finger fucking, semi public sex, age gap (no mention of it tho), slight dirty talk, slight edging, third person pov idk what else to add honestly.

A/N: I don't know if anyone reads this tbh but if you are thank you so much for bearing with me. I'm pretty new to this whole fic writing thing so i don't consider my works as good but i'm trying to get better. This took a while to write and it is shorter than i wanted to write but at least i manage to finish it. Anyway hope you enjoy! here is the link of chapter one if anyone is interested.

She wakes up after a couple of hours later. Thinking about the current situation of their relationship. The emptiness of bed greets her, the bed is empty except for her. shame, guilt and anger cripples. But before moving to any conclusion, she decides to check the other rooms out, just in case he was in the kitchen or the living room. Deep down, she knows. She knows that he is just the same, left her and didn’t even say anything. Well, it was just a one night stand i guess, she thinks but can’t help with the suffocating pain. She checks the kitchen, the living room even the bathroom. He’s gone.

Even though it was years ago, they had a passionate relationship. Yet it was not the best relationship out there. It was flawed from the beginning. She checks out her phone, just in case he left any messages. None. How pathetic i am she mutters. How could i be so naive to return to this country after all these years and expected him to be better? Well, why did he come back when he heard that i’m here? It is still dark outside. Tears form at the corner of her eyes but she brushes them away, he does not even worth a single drop of tear. Her thoughts are exact opposite of the prior. Up until that night, she was seeing everything through the lens of love.

Her biggest mistake was that she sugarcoated their memories and assumed Javier was the best boyfriend out there. Yes, she made mistakes as well and the break up was mutual but the reason why they broken up was how much of an asshole Javier was. They had great memories together but problems were overpowering. She missed him so much that created a fucking different persona in her head. When it is in the past, even the most anguishing pain seems as if it was impeccable. She always remembered the times they were laughing, kissing, tangled in bedsheets. But their two years of on and off relationship was more than that. The tears, shoutings…Javier was a caring and loving partner when he wanted to be one. But he was not the best in long term relationships, he was committed yes but it took a while to reach a point for them to build that. Now he was gone, again. The pain is unbearable.

 She feels like someone is ripping her heart apart. She laughs for a second, it feels weird, after ten years, he broke my heart in our first encounter, she thinks. She gets back to her bed and lays down; it is around 5 in the morning. She thought that they’d be spending the weekend together or maybe even get back together. But he does not even wait till the morning. He leaves the second she falls asleep. Tears roll down on her cheeks, she can’t help it and she drifts off.

He is in his hotel room, thinking about what has happened. He missed her so much but they had different expectations from their lives and he was not ready to go through all that shit that they once had. He tries to justify what he just done, left her once again. When they first met, he never wanted to be in a serious relationship and he made that clear. It was not his fault. Was it? He was happy with his relationship with women. He had informants which most of them were hookers that helped him to get information about cartel and give him a good half an hour. He was so used to have one-night stands that he instantly rejected her love. She had the biggest crush on him, it was impossible to resist his charm. They knew their expectations were different, they were different but they somehow worked things out, till they can’t.

She wakes up after her semi successful sleep attempt. A part of her wants to cry her eyes out but she decides to not to do that. He does not even worth it, she thinks. Lazily heads to the bathroom and washes her face and brushes her teeth then walks to her kitchen and starts the coffee machine to make her morning coffee. “You taste like heaven” his voices echoes, she almost drops the mug in her hand. The way he kisses her. “damn it” she mutters, “get it together girl, he left you again.” She pours the coffee on her mug and sits on the kitchen stool, slowly sipping her coffee. She feels the ghost of his hands roaming around her body. “I’m sick. I must be.”

               Days pass, she does not hear a word from Javier after that night. Sadness leaves its place to a boiling anger. She wants to see him again, but not because she misses her or wants him to fuck her, no. She wants to yell, scream at him. A strong slap across his face would soothe her furry. Though she is in denial, her madness comes from love, it is her love buried inside all that anger. She tried her hardest to not to blame him for their break up ten years ago but with the reoccurring incident -well technically they never talked about their future so he didn’t leave him but still- she starts blaming him. If he was considerate enough, he would call her, if he really missed her, he would find a way. But on the other hand, maybe he wanted her to live a better life, he maybe thought she’d be better without him. She shakes her head, if he was so thoughtful of a man, he would wait till morning to talk, he wouldn’t run out the moment she falls asleep. Her thoughts doesn’t give him a single second of peace. She finds a way to justify him but then finds something else to blame him, it is like a never ending cycle

He is not sure what to do at that point. He wants to talk to her to tell her that it was a good night that they had, in memory of their past. But that was it, he is not sure if they can have a relationship after ten years. He is not sure that if he wants to be in a serious relationship, again. It is tiring, to have someone that you have to care for. To think your actions carefully to not to hurt the person. To have someone that cares and loves you. Even though the idea seems thrilling at first, it is not good when you think on a deeper level.  He decides to pop in at her apartment and have a conversation about their situation because he will have to leave soon. He just came to see her when he heard that she was back in Colombia which he regrets now. He gets ready to leave his hotel room and strolls around the streets before finding the courage to knock on her door. It is pretty late but he knows that she does not sleep around this time. After contemplating for a solid ten minutes, he knocks the door.             

   She reads a book, finally getting over what happened four days ago. Not thinking about him, how their tongue danced against each other’s, how he grabbed her by the waist and yanked to the wall, how toxicating his smell was. Nope she does not think about it at all. She hears a knock and opens the door and he is standing right across her. “You must be joking!” she scoffs and rolls her eyes. “Sweetheart, please I came to talk.” “Do not sweetheart to me, you are nobody! You hear me?! We have nothing to talk. It is done, it was done ten years ago but I was foolish enough to believe that we could work things out!” she does not yell but her words are sharp as a blade. Anger mixed with sadness pours from her tongue like poison. “Be calm for a second for god’s sake! I don’t want to end this bad!” he replies sternly. “I don’t want to end this bad” is all she can hear. He came here to end, he does not want to make things work, she thinks. She wants to cry, sob even. They stand on the doorway for a while, she does not invite him in. Then, instead of letting sadness taking control of her, she pushes him from the doorway. “Get the fuck away from my house. You are not welcomed here. And just because you feel guilty due to your mistakes, I won’t forgive you! you fucked up this relationship.”  Surprised with her sudden push, he feels anger boiling insides his veins. “My mistakes? Are you serious? Look it is obvious that you are not ready to have an adult conversation. I should have guessed it that you would put all the blame on me. Once your thick head realizes that we both fucked up, we can have a proper talk.”  She wants to push his buttons, make him furious. All those feelings accumulated in her makes her bold. “You don’t even know how to talk. You are scared shitless of feeling some emotions that the moment you feel something you run away. that’s why you could never manage to have a proper relationship. You just fool yourself into saying that you need a quick fuck with whores, but in reality, you are just a scared kid trapped into a 43 years old man’s body.” She knows, she stepped a boundary. She knows she hit a nerve, it was her intention from the beginning but when she catches the fury in his eyes, she takes a step back, her hand is on the door handle waiting for the close the door if he tries to do something. But in all honesty, she wants him to do something. “don’t try to play that card again, I never wanted to have a relationship. Remember the nights you came to me crying, begging for my love.”  They don’t hold anything back. “Oh, for fuck’s sake, I didn’t force you to anything! You fucking needed me. You needed my love. You hear. All that façade, it is nothing but a lie Javi. You are so vulnerable to even confess it. The idea of someone leaving you is eating you alive.”

He grabs her by the neck and yanks her to the door. It does not hurt, on the contrary is turns her on. She slightly grins. “This was all you wanted, from the beginning. Isn’t is, you filthy whore?” “You need me to fuck that hole of yours, hm?”  his tone makes her dizzy. “Yes.” He slightly tightens his grip which makes her squirm. She squeezes her legs shut to help herself a little. Javier catches her sneaky action. A chuckle escapes from his pretty lips. “You’re such a thirsty girl. You want me so bad; you need me. Is it true?” she nods, she is more than eager. At that moment she decides to throw her pride out of the window. He kisses him deeply. It is wet, filthy, noisy. She breaks the kiss. “Javi, please let’s get inside. We are literally in the building hall. Somebody can see us; I live in here!” she hisses. He grins, it’s almost a devilish one. “No, sweetheart. Where is the fun in that? We will do one round in here and maybe you can be a good girl; we can move the fun into your bed, or we can continue in this hallway of yours.” He fakes a pout, while words dripping from his lips like honey. His grip on her neck loosens, he slides down his hand in her panties while licking her neck. She tries to contain her moans by biting her lips, grips him by his broad shoulders tightly to not to fall. She feels his finger playing with her clit. She wants so scream his name. He pumps his fingers inside of her hole. She moans loudly. “can’t hold it, sorry.” She murmurs. He chuckles staring her eyes. Her cheeks are slightly flushed. “Don’t be baby girl. It is music to my ears. But your neighbors might not like it as much as I do.” If somebody would see them in that situation, it would be embarrassing to say the least. She always tried her best to look like a good, respectful neighbor. But getting finger fucked by her ex in the hallway is not exactly a respectful thing. His fingers inside her giving the best of pleasures while she watches his face closely. He looks so pretty, flawless even.

They get lost in each other’s eyes until she grabs him from his hair and pulls him to herself and kisses. While she kisses him, he adds a third finger. She moans with the feeling, it is not uncomfortable, just unexpected. “Javi, I’m close.”  “Hold on baby for a while. You can do it, I know it baby girl.”  He fastens his fingers while cooing her the sweetest words. “No, honey, I can’t please.” “You are such a pretty girl; you are doing so good my love. Hold it a little longer, I know you can do it.” She wants to come; she needs to come but his praises are better than anything in this world that she does anything in her power to hold it a little longer. “Look at you, such a perfect whore for me. aren’t you my pretty whore? So wet and welcoming for me.” she moans again, at this point she knows for sure that somebody heard them. His fingers hit the perfect spot. He is lost in the moment. Her warm, wet cunt is all he asks for. “Javi, please.” tears run down on her cheeks. “shh, don’t cry baby. You know we have a long way to go.” He murmurs. “tell me, who do you belong to my love?” he asks. “what the fuck Javi? I’m not a damn object. I don’t belong to anyone.” “hmm, is that so?” he answers and saves his fingers out of her. She whines. “what happened? Any changes in your thoughts?” He chuckles. She rolls her eyes “you’re so stupid.” She chuckles as well. “You. I belong to you.” “mhmm thought so.” He doesn’t lose a second and sticks his fingers inside of her again, pumping them in and out. His thumb toys with her clit. She kisses his neck, bites here and there which sends a shiver down on his spine. His cock is getting harder with each sound she makes. “I want to cum, please.” She whines. This time he lets her. “Okay baby. You’ve been such a good girl, took my fingers really well. You can cum.”  She comes on his fingers. He cleans her cum by licking his fingers. They hear someone from the upper floors opens their door “Is anyone in there?” the neighbor calls out. They can barely hold their giggles. The neighbor gets back inside their home and close the door shut. She whispers “Can’t believe you fucked me in the hallway.” “don’t worry baby, we’ll continue this inside.” He kisses her and she wraps her arms around his neck. He drags her inside and closes the door shut by his feet.

[saberghatz]

1-70

OH MY GODODOD CRACKING MY KNUCKLES

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? YES PRETTY GOOD!!

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? My friends :')

03: Do you regret anything? Like a billion things that I won't get into here >:)

04: Are you insecure? Only on Fridays

05: What is your relationship status? SINGLE YEAAA BOIEEIEEEE

06: How do you want to die? In my sleep would be the most ideal tbh I'm down for that

07: What did you last eat? Ritz crackers and peanut butter;;.....

08: Played any sports? IN MY LIFE? YEA!! RECENTLY? UHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh

I hate playing on teams so I usually just fuck about on my own or with friends, you'll never catch me joining like actual sports teams again

09: Do you bite your nails? Surprisingly no o-o

10: When was your last physical fight? Too long ago. I'm really itching. SOMEONE PLEASE SPAR WITH ME

11: Do you like someone? I WISH I DID. FUCK.

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? HEEELL NAW I'M LIKE A GRANDMA WHEN IT COMES TO GOING TO BED EARLY (against my will, i am simply a tired bitch)

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Everyone except the people I don't hate

14: Do you miss someone? Deeply :D

15: Have any pets? I don't have any personally, but my mom has two kitties named Nikki and Tessie. When I go visit her, I get to see them too. She had them since before I moved away, so I still consider them kind of my cats :')

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Lonely enough to do this, but also happy enough to do this

17: Ever made out in the bathroom? I thought this said 'have you ever made it out of the bathroom' and I'm like honestly no my ibs could never

On that note, no but call me

18: Are you scared of spiders? No :(

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I'd go back to a time before I was born, definitely the 70s or 80s just to experience it for awhile.

But if I was limited to only going back in time during the years I was alive, no I would never go back. I feel like I've learned a lot over the years and I don't want to lose that progress

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Probably the airport

21: What are your plans for this weekend? MY ROOMMATE BLAIR HAS A CHOW CHOW PUPPY AND WE'RE TAKING HER TO A DOGGIE SOCIAL ON SATURDAY. Also maybe going to an art show/mall on Sunday.

22: Do you want to have kids? How many? Zero, have you seen the state of the world??

23: Do you have piercings? How many? I have ear piercings, but I think they closed up :// I REGRET LETTING THEM CLOSE

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? Like in school? That's a lifetime ago oh god Science

25: Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes almost everybody I've ever known, whether it ended on good or bad terms. I am simply a sentimental soul with a horrible memory

26: What are you craving right now? Making out with a stranger that I know

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? @_@;;;.... yea

28: Have you ever been cheated on? No

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? PROBABLY, I'M SORRY IF SO

30: What’s irritating you right now? Social media is grating on my fucking nerves, so much so that I'm weening off insta and twitter and I've ended up back here. Right here.

31: Does somebody love you? If so lemme know

32: What is your favourite color? Pink, white, gold

33: Do you have trust issues? Fortunately not

34: Who/what was your last dream about? I think I dreamed I was Percy Jackson and I was befriending some monsters instead of killing them.

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My roommate like literally yesterday :D

36: Do you give out second chances too easily? I'd give anyone a second chance, but I don't think I'd give a third chance.

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? I forgive because I don't hold grudges and then my memory is so rotten that I forget why I was mad in the first place

38: Is this year the best year of your life? ITS BARELY 2024 SO I CAN'T ANSWER YET

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 16 I think. Shout out to Solangelo

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? No but this made me realize I never have, and now I want to

51: Favourite food? I can't think of anything, so like I do at restaurant menus I'll default to chicken strips :)

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Yes 100%

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? shower, work on writing my fics, jerk off, draw, you decide what order

54: Is cheating ever okay? Never, unless your partner knows but then its not chEATING IS IT

55: Are you mean? Honestly maybe

56: How many people have you fist fought? Not enough (none. please. please spar with me I need to train)

57: Do you believe in true love? I believe some people believe in it and can find that for themselves. I hope I become one of them

58: Favourite weather? If I can't wear a bikini, I'm sad. But crisp Autumn mornings also hit like no other..

59: Do you like the snow? I love visiting the snow, I wouldn't want to live in the snow

60: Do you wanna get married? I haven't really thought about it lately. So currently, I guess not xD

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? Hell yea, but turn up the heat

62: What makes you happy? @hyenahijinks @yuuidflourite @comets-nix and drawing

63: Would you change your name? Some people call me Grace which I like a lot, it's my middle name tho

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? I'd totally do it, but I'd probably get that fist fight I've been begging for instead

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Been there done that, we over it and stronger than ever >:)

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? @hyenahijinks ILY bitch

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? @hyenahijinks

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? LOL MY MOM TODAY ACTUALLY

69: Do you believe in soulmates? ARE TRUE LOVE AND SOULMATES NOT THE SAME THING

70: Is there anyone you would die for? My friends and parents 100% but I'm also not like super attached to breathing to begin with so the decision would be very easy

THATS A HELL OF A WAY TO END AN ASK MEME THANK YOU FOR ASKING THESE HUMPHREY

[tomboyjessie13-artblog]

Sorry for the lack of drawings, this was supposed to be done a few weeks ago, but as usually I got distracted by the internet and personal drama, as well as writing a long post about the characters.

That being said, I made a series of drawings of my Jojo OC Medea interacting with the Crusaders since there isn’t a lot of them(except as Incorrect Quotes), and as some of you can guess, this takes place during the “Battle of Egypt” arc since she wasn't their ally until then.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jean Pierre Polanreff

- Relationship: Sibling bond - She nicknames him "Frenchie" - Shares a single brain cell with him

- He and Medea actually do get along well as he used to serve(brainwashed) DIO and was dismayed over him "betraying" their Lord, he's a bit more forgiving and patient with her since he knows that DIO's just using her, he does have his breaking points though.

Despite being enemies, she has no problem bonding with him over their enjoyment of Western cartoons such as "Tom and Jerry" and "Looney Toons" during their stay at a Luxor hotel.

Even though he got his revenge, he's still haunted by his late-sister losing her purity and life, and was horrified when he found out that DIO is doing the same to Medea, thus starts fighting tooth and nail to make sure she lives.

She later apologized to Polnareff for treating him like crap when she returns to Cairo with Kakyoin, and thanked him for killing J. Geil as he was horrible towards women, she fights alongside Polnareff and Iggy against Vanilla Ice.

Polanreff became her best man at her's and Keiji's wedding in 1994 and was ecstatic to see her baby girl Noriko, it was the last time she saw him alive. Medea asked Jotaro where he had gone during their drive to S-City, but even he doesn't know where Polnareff is either.

Medea later grieved for him when she found out what became of him during his pursuit for Diavolo and the stand arrows in "Golden Wind".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jotaro Kujo

- Relationship: Enemies to friends - Calls him "Jojo" just to make fun of him as she thought it was a dumb nickname - Battle of the sexist jerks; broken hearted Misandrist vs punk ass Misogynist

- She first assumed that Jotaro was an adult due to his large stature and mature features, only to get caught completely off guard when she realizes that he's actually a 17-year-old highschooler.

Jotaro does the "YAKAMASHI!" and "annoying bitch" schtick when she started doing her villainous monologuing, she asked if he kissed his mother with that mouth, that comment resulted in her ass getting kicked and losing two left molars.

Jotaro was the one who turned her into their mole when they came to Egypt, he kept foiling her murder attempts during the whole true trip. Despite all that, he was furious when he found out that DIO tried to kill her in a similar fashion to Enyaba, wanting to beat the shit of of him right now for it.

After returning to Cairo with Kakyoin, their relationship improved for the better as they no longer fought with each other. Before "DIO's World", Jotaro thanked her for being one of the few women in his life to not squeal at him for being "handsome".

After DIO's defeat, she goes with him and Joseph to Japan and hasn't left since. The two became parent figures to the kids of Morioh during "Diamond is Unbreakable", despite being on good terms now, she can't help but ruffle Jotaro's feathers just for the fun of it.

At some point, he reprimand her for being too distant from her daughter, only to get called out on it as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joseph Joestar

- Relationship: Complicated - Medea slut shames him to high heaven - Joseph had a BSoD moment when he heard Medea gush about the Pillar Men

- She chases him all across Asia for weeks just to get her revenge for "driving away Jason" from her and offer his blood to DIO, fails each time. At some point Joseph told her the reason why they're going after DIO, which throws her off completely as DIO never told her about Holy Kujo.

Despite that, she still chases the Crusaders after DIO gave her one last chance to redeem herself, which pisses off Joseph even more.

After she became their mole in Egypt, he forces her to wear his old breathing mask as a trust bargain as well as keep her under tight ropes, he even rigged it with Hamon so that whenever she removes it, she'll get electrocuted by overdrive(same rules apply to her Stand to).

When she bribed Alessi to age down Joseph, she wasn't expecting him to turn into his younger and sexier self(circa Part 2) and became smitten. Joseph has NEVER let her live it down since then.

It took him an hour to save Medea's life from DIO's blood poisoning thanks to his Hamon. This selfless act made her realize that Joseph, despite his flaws, is willing to help others good and bad, no longer wanting revenge against him. 

She would however eventually have the last laugh when she found out that he was sent to the dog house after his affair got exposed in 1999, she also believed that he's faking his senility just to get his "get out of jail free" card.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Muhammad Avdol

- Relationship: Enemies to friends - She was the reason why DIO found him at the Khan el Khalili - He was shocked when he realized that Medea isn't a Tarot Stand user

- After Cameo was defeated, she was shocked to learn that Avdol is alive and well, with him scolding her for harassing the Crusaders despite getting her revenge against Jason, she fled back to Egypt afterwards, having his arrival killing her mood and not wishing to get BBQ'​​​​​​​d by [Magician's Red].

At Aswan, when she tries to kill him at the Hospital, Avdol sought out her weakness and told Jotaro to exploit it. While not happy with her murderous plans, he's a lot more patient with her than Polnareff is due to knowing that DIO brainwashed her. 

During their trip to Cairo, he was actually pleased when he saw that Medea took an interest in his culture's myths and legends and they ended up talking more over it, even letting slip about the Glory God's Stands and which god they represent.

When she realized what happened, she blamed him for tricking her, which isn't true but he joked about it anyways.

He was the first one to discover that Medea's welts were Vampire bites thanks to Joseph's warning about Vampires and drove her to the hospital. Despite losing their mole, Avdol believed that her health is one of their highest priorities.

When she came back to Cairo, he was happy to know that she's all better. During "DIO's World", she called him crazy when he wanted to burn down the manor due to their friends being inside, she witnessed Vanilla Ice killing him afterwards, traumatizing her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Iggy

- Relationship: Enemies to friends - She compares him to her late pet Boston Terrier "Ozzy" - Iggy enjoys messing with her just as how he messes with Polnareff

- She thought that he was a normal dog at first before discovering that he's a Tarot Stand user represented by "The Fool" and instantly regrets it.

She got farted on when he smelled her body oder and called him a "jerk mutt" for that, he also raided her backpack and stole her clothes and sandwiches that she packed for herself, and he kicked her into the Nile river when she tried to attack him.

When Medea got hospitalized for Blood poisoning, Iggy smelled DIO's odor coming off of her welts which scared him into defending himself as he can naturally smell evil like most dogs do, he used [The Fool] to recreate DIO's likeness from that scent alone to show the Crusaders what he smelled, which is how Joseph was able to save her and how Iggy was able to recreate DIO during the Vanilla Ice fight.

Iggy started warming up to Medea after she returned to Cairo as he finally understood the pain she gained from DIO after his encounter with Pet Shop, but he wouldn't admit it, she and Iggy chilled out while everyone was having their last supper together. 

She mourned his death and petted his corpse, and calling him a "good boy" for saving her's and Polnareff's lives.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Noriaki Kakyoin

- Relationship: Reconciled friendship - She nicknames him "Cherry boy" - She learned about Morioh because of him

- He was one of the few Agents that she actually became close friends with without hang ups, so Medea was very hurt when he "betrayed" DIO because of the Crusaders.

She tried convincing him to leave them and return to Egypt with her, when he refused, she just went: "...Fine! Die with those bastards then!" in grief induced anger. Kakyoin tried reasoning with her before she began harassing them throughout the journey.

They reconciled when she was hospitalized and they started bonding over their first encounters with DIO, as well as having no real friends until they met the Crusaders.

She kept Kakyoin's Walkman that he left behind at the mansion and used it to listen to his music and learned some Japanese, at some point she bought herself a "Pat Metheny Group" album for it and became attached to "Last Train Home", Medea eventually gave it back to him during their train ride to Cairo.

She cradled his body and grieved for him when DIO murdered him in cold blood. After DIO's defeat, she cried over his retrieved corpse and thanked him for everything he's done for her and the Crusaders.

She kept his cherry earrings as a memento to remember him by. In 1993, she originally planned on naming her future son "Noriaki" when she was pregnant, but ended up getting a daughter instead, whom she names "Noriko".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Medea King belongs to me *And yes, I threw in a Family Guy death pose

[highlifeboat]

First off, my heart was broken with the "Swap!Mel telling Alcina not to baby her" bit, please tell me they talk things out and get their happy vibes back. :( Second - I now really wanna hear about Mia and the wife from Crimson Snow. You may have given me a new ship and need to know this XD

Always gotta throw in a little angsty family drama, no matter the AU.

I feel like, eventually, Alcina is going to question Melony's sudden disdain for getting babied. Her daughter is just kind of coasting and sullen since it stopped, and it's worrying. With all the strange vibes between her kids, too, there has to be some suspicion that something happened.

She has a little private meeting with Mel and pushes the subject more, reminding Mel she can be trusted and all that. Mel, despite having every right to throw Max under the bus, goes with the half truth of "I've just heard.. people say some things about me." and how it made her think on how much time she spends around Alcina. She doesn't like being seen as a baby, or weak, or anything like that since she's arguable just as capable as her siblings. But when Alcina asks her if she's sure she doesn't want to be babied anymore she doesn't have a real answer.

Mel still likes the extra attention, and the kisses and hugs, and general motherly love, but she also feels like she should get some independence and responsibility. Alcina tells her they'll work to find a nice balance that makes Mel happy, and if Alcina ever goes too much either way to simply tell her. She's going to miss her baby moth and constant cuddling and whatever, but she won't deny Mel's want to have her own life.

A little bitter sweet, but they hug it out after and get back into their good vibes, even if it isn't the same as before.

AS FOR THE SECOND THING--

Listen, okay, so... Ideas are limited at the moment, but bare with me.

Main backstory isn't fully important right now, but the short version is Mia gets relocated to whatever snowy undisclosed town Crimson Snow takes place in. Gets a note from the neighbour across the road as an invite for dinner, say "fuck it" because she's tired of being lonely post-Ethan dying and losing everything (again). Ends up in Scary Ex's house, who quickly realizes Mia is NOT her ex boyf. Hilarity ensues, Mia makes friends with a demon woman, enter gay lady kisses. Y'know, classic tale pfff.

I will supply a little bit of headcanons, because that's the only way I can explain ideas coherently pfff.

The reason the Ex doesn't kill Mia on the spot, is because Mia still takes her up on the dinner offer/is actually civil despite... everything

Like, my girl saw the spaghetti on the table and said "I know this is awkward, but I brought wine and I feel like it's rude if I just leave."

Ex is initially confused, but after realizing Mark(the game MC/Ex Boyf) isn't showing up/moved, agrees.

This is heavily reliant on the idea that the Scary Ex only kills Mark in-game because he's running/hiding from her, and because Mia doesn't the Ex is chill.

A good chunk of dinner is Ex venting about how "I put all this effort into the holiday and he doesn't even bother to tell me he's MOVING?" and Mia nodding along and saying stuff like "Sounds like he was a loser honestly. You deserve better."

In terms of general relationship, lowkey they be cute

Ex drags Mia dress shopping all the time, for both of them

Mia always be complimenting her. On her dresses, and make up, and cooking, just showers this woman with compliments.

Ex has accidentally scared the shit out of Mia in the middle of the night before. More than once.

They do living room karaoke.

Mia might have a thing for women with sharp teeth and long nails.

The Ex is lowkey ecstatic to just be in a relationship with someone who doesn't call her crazy

Mia casually dropping how she used to be possessed too, except it wasn't by choice and now she's forever infected with sentient fungus.

Scary Ex being like "That explains a lot actually." and then never bringing it up again

Basic idea is: Local Himbo falls in love with Horror Beyond Human Comprehension

[occult-roommates]

Salut les amoureux

On a video call, Audrey wanted nothing more than to know what her best friend had been up to this past month. The two haven’t had the occasion to see each other since Dawud moved to San Myshuno, as they’re both busy adult with a job now. Also, plane tickets aren’t cheap, and the entire car ride would be more than 24 hours. For a good hour, they talked about everything that had been going on in their life. Audrey didn’t had much to say, for her it was business as usual...  

On the other hand, Dawud’s life barely looked like what it was barely two months prior. And sure, he could have tell her about Kino, but he couldn’t. He didn’t receive the full approval of the alien yet, and he didn’t want to betray their trust...Speaking of trust betrayal, he then went on to ramble for several minutes about his sort of relationship with Charlie. He actually had not mentioned that earlier in the conversation. On one hand, Audrey was happy to see her friend finally improving after being a depressed mess for so long, but also...

Audrey: You...You have a girlfriend?! Dawud: I mean, kind of, I guess. We’re more like fuck-friends than anything... Audrey: What do you mean by that? Dawud: Well, like I said, we’re sleeping together, and it was flattering to feel desired by someone at first, but at this point, I’m starting to realize her and I is not meant to be. Like, I’m reaching a point where I just kinda space out during sex cause I’m bored and not that into it, and I don’t really see myself with her in the long or short term. Audrey: Then break up you idiot!

Like, really? Audrey knew her friend was...not that mature emotionally, but how did he get himself in such a pickle in barely a month? 

Dawud: But like, I told you, she has severe trust issue because of her ex-boyfriend, and I don’t want her to think I only used her for sex or just for my broken ego. Those were not my intention at all! At first I legit thought we might become a couple, sadly it ain’t the case. But also, she’s like the head of the apartment, so if I piss her off I might get kicked out. Audrey: The earlier you tell her, the less likely she is to be mad at you. Be honest, tell her it is not meant to be, and hope for the best. At worst, you’ll just move back with me, eh. Dawud: You know what, you’re right. My mom was a feminist, and I don’t think she’d be proud of me if I lied to a woman about how I feel just because I get to have sex with her. It’s gross and wrong, and I don’t wanna disappoint my mom. Audrey: Speaking of disappointing your mom, does she know you’re no longer a student at the Oasis Spring Technological Institute, and haven’t been in more than a year? Or that your breakfast is literally a coke?  Dawud: That’s a problem for another day.

After that, Audrey had to hung up, she had to start getting ready for work. Dawud, on the other hand, was on his day off, which means that as soon as Charlie came back from taking picture of the city for her Instagram, he’s gonna tell her. And since nobody has ever taught him breaking up etiquette, he decided to do it in public, at a local park near the water. 

Dawud: Look, Charlie, I’m sorry. I just...Don’t really feel anything for you except friendship. I was afraid to tell you, cause I didn’t want you to think I used you or anything, but that wasn’t my intention. I was hoping that attraction I felt for last month would evolve into something deeper, but sadly it did not. If anything it kinda...faded away. Charlie: Oh! Dawud: What? What does this mean? Charlie: I actually felt pretty similarly. Like, when I first saw you I immediately felt attracted to you, which I thought was a sign since I didn’t felt anything like this since Thomas. But I quickly came to realize I was probably just lonely and horny. I wanted to tell you, but I was afraid of breaking your heart, since I do think you’re very nice and I know you don’t have the best self-esteem. I mean, I still think you’re my type, but I was starting to tell I wasn’t your type. Dawud: So...we cool? We’re still friend?  Charlie: Yeah!!

Wow, ok. This whole break up thing is easy, ABBA lied in Knowing Me, Knowing You! Just like that, Charlie and Dawud kept on walking, before stopping for lunch. It was a bit early for that, but the sun now fully out, and Charlie being a big fan of not burning to death, they had to take shelter inside a building quick.

This whole thing was under one condition, and it was that neither of them should ever bring up this weird month of their life where they were sort of dating.

Prev - Next

[erodasfishtacos]

Crackin’ the Code

prompt: Harry and YN tie the knot in a beautiful castle off the coat of Italy. Harry reflects back on his life before his love. YN has past insecurities creep on on her before the wedding. 

note: this is the necklace that YN receives as (one) her wedding gifts from H and she wears it during the ceremony.

word count: 9k

warnings: smut

***<-- click for visuals throughout (super important for this one shot!)

if you enjoy this fic (which i worked REALLY hard on) please reblog, like, comment, and come talk to me!

please please considering donating to my kofi since all my work is FREE to you guys!

---

The world expected an extravagant wedding with week-long festivities, celebrations in destinations only the richest could afford, and all the big names of the business world who ran in his circle.

The media outlets were just waiting, quite impatiently, for the day that the richest man in Europe settled down with a significant other. They would have news stories for decades when it came to the couple.

Of course, Harry Styles was going to marry a household name - the public thought. 

Whether it be an heiress, a model, maybe even an actress? The choices for the most eligible bachelor were limitless.

Any time he was at an event, usually a charity gala or black-tie dinner, paparazzi would take candid pictures of him with any female and then the following day publish an article about how they were a couple.

However, what the world didn’t know was that he’s been in a relationship for a year and a half, has already been engaged after the eight month mark, and moved into pretty soon after but that was hushed.

Nearly no one except a few key employees and family members knew about the couple. Everyone in his office building in the heart of London had to sign NDA’s at the beginning of their job - though almost all of them didn’t know she existed.

Harry did not put any limits on YN for the wedding planning. 

No price, no expectations, nothing. If she wanted ten-thousand people or zero people in attendance that was her call. If she wanted to drop ten million dollars on a wedding or a hundred that was fine too.

The CEO never fantasized about a wedding. 

Well he had but no in the terms most do. He didn’t sit and imagine the venue, the food menu, or the decorations. 

No, he didn’t care about any of that, he daydreamed about the fact that he and someone would commit themselves to each other for the rest of their lives.

Harry wanted to marry his fiance after their first date.

He was usually a very patient man, couldn’t have gotten where he was if he wasn’t. When it came to this, each day he wasn’t married to the love of his life felt like torture.

Since he proposed to her in his briefs in their bedroom, he had imagined her looking immaculate in whatever she chose to wear, exchanging vows of devotion, and then being tied together for life.

He never thought he would get here. He’d never felt a connection with someone like he had with the feisty waitress who bumped into him. Begin to believe that he was broken or lacking emotion because no matter how sweet the girl was he couldn’t see himself with the person.

Don’t get him wrong. 

He took many women out on dates that were downright awful. Asking him about money, suggesting he take them on expensive vacations or buy them a designer item, being too forward and palming his crotch in the middle of dinner.

One of the last dates he went on before he gave up was the one that made him stop looking all together, about six months before he ran in YN.

---

It was an expensive restaurant in the heart of London. It had a waitlist for months but one call and they could magically make an available booth for the billionaire within the hour. 

The girl he was sitting across from was a so-to-speak blind date. 

A set up by one of his business partners who stated that they would be a good match. Harry had rolled his eyes at that but couldn’t come up with an excuse fast enough to say ‘no.’

Her name was Aria, she had a respectable job at a local law firm as an assistant to a very well-known lawyer in the area. 

She was beautiful in the way of looking just like an instagram model with long dark extensions, false eyelashes that made it hard to determine what color her eyes were, and an outfit that made Harry a bit embarrassed to be seen with her - short and low cut at a five-star restaurant.

“Yeah, I just got back from Mallorca with a group of friends,” She tells him, flipping through the photo album on her phone to show him pictures. 

When she ‘accidentally’ swipes (and slowly swipes) again so that Harry definitely gets a glimpse of a nude selfie.

Harry internally groans, couldn’t be less turned on by that, and doesn’t acknowledge it - much to Aria's disappointment. 

She was fishing for a compliment, maybe a request for him to take the phone and look closer at the picture like most men would.

Instead he sits back, takes a sip of his wine, and nods curtly, “It looks like you had a good time.”

She stumbles for a second, confused by his sudden standoffishness, and clicks her phone locked before putting it next to her on the table, “Did I offend you?”

He was already done with the date, with the dating scene, with fucking everything honestly. 

What a goddamn waste of a night.

Harry barks out a cruel laugh, “It takes a lot more to offend me than a picture of y’tits but it’s a bit offensive that y’think so little of yourself that you think that’s how y’going to impress me. Those tits didn’t impress me much, darling.”

Aria’s eyes narrow in blatant disbelief at how much of an asshole he was being. 

Granted, she did feel a bit of embarrassment creeping up in her stomach about thinking showing him that picture was a good idea but still, he didn’t need to react like that.

“It really makes sense why you don’t have a girlfriend, it’s because of what an asshole you are,” The girl sneers with venom as she tucks her phone into her clutch, swigging down the last drops of the expensive wine.

He shrugs like he’s unbothered, a nasty feeling quilling in the pit of his stomach as he keeps an outward expression of nonchalance and ease, it make the raven-haired woman even more furious as he replies cooly, “I’m not being an asshole, honesty hurts sometimes. Maybe if you think the way you attract someone is by nude pictures, you should try Tinder or Bumble.”

“I hope you have fun living the rest of your life alone. You may have your money but you’re going to end up alone and it will be all you fucking have,” Aria tells him before pushing out her chair and leaving before the main course even arrives. 

Harry sits there for a moment, swallowing and pleading with himself to not let the nasty words set in because they felt too real and too personal - she had actually struck some type of chord within and it had his stomach churning.

When he pays the bill, apologizing profusely for leaving dinner before the entree arrives but with an excuse of a company emergency - it’s eerily quiet in his car as he drives home to his massive home with no one in it.

It doesn’t happen often. 

He should call his mum, Gemma, Dorothy even to talk it out but he feels so fucking alone because he can’t get it right. He can’t connect with anyone and it is starting to feel hopeless.

He is angry, so angry at himself, that he can’t shake the feeling of it and he feels like he’s losing control because he never fucking talks about his emotions.

A beautiful set of dishware was sitting out his dining room table, the housekeeper had carefully unwrapped them earlier in the day. 

They were imported from Beijing, decorated with real gold, and handcrafted. It had cost him nearly forty-thousand dollars for a set of fucking plates and bowls.

I hope you have fun living the rest of your life alone. You may have your money but you’re going to end up alone and it will be all you fucking have.

It is repeatedly on a loop in his head, glares at the items on the dinner table like they’re mocking him, and he has no wits about himself before he’s taking one of the beautiful bowls and throwing it against the wall as hard as possible.

I hope you have fun living the rest of your life alone. You may have your money but you’re going to end up alone and it will be all you fucking have.

By the time he’s done, his chest is heaving, and his face is red. 

When reality starts to set back in, every single item from the set is destroyed on the floor, the wall’s paint chipped from where he’d hurled them.

He was so fucked up.

-

Harry couldn’t help but relieve the feelings of that nasty flashback. He couldn’t believe that he had been at that point in his life - not when he had the most all-consuming, amazing in every single way woman laying next to him in his bed.

YN had shown Harry that he had never been broken, he had just been waiting. 

She was his soulmate and he had been waiting for her since forever. He truly believed that as he looked at the girl next to him with enough emotion his heart might burst.

She was just...everything.

YN was so fucking funny - the funniest person Harry had ever met. She was loving in a way that made you feel like you belonged. Compassionate in a way that makes you want to be more selfless yourself. Intelligent enough that it was breathtaking and unreal - and that was just the tip of the iceberg.

She was uncaring of who Harry was - in the most perfect way. 

Money wasn’t a personality trait that she defined him with. She loved him for who he was at the bare basics, stripped away from his public life.

She was confident in a way that girls rarely were. 

Bared face and more beautiful than the highest-paid models. 

Her body was her own, embracing every curve and inch of it without any shame. Let herself be authentic in front of Harry which made him feel like he had won a secret lottery.

Right now, she was fast asleep next to him in bed after stuffing herself full of oreos that she was dunking in milk. She ignored Harry’s looks of disgust at the soggy cookies and munched away happily which made him happy in turn.

She still had a dark crumb on the corner of her puffy lips, her mouth parted just the slightest amount, and her face smushed halfway into the pillow. 

The shirt she had on was so oversized she was swimming in it and a pair of soft pink cheeky underwear.

Currently, she was the farthest thing from graceful and Harry loved that so fucking much. 

As they lay mere days away from their wedding, remembering that nasty flashback, he can’t help but remember their first date and how he had known from them that he had finally found a spark, a connection to another human being.

--

Harry cannot remember the last time he had been nervous. 

Maybe back in his teenage years? If that. 

It was an unsettling feeling that was currently pooling in the pit of his stomach as he changed his outfit for the third time before finally being somewhat satisfied with the suit he had picked out - tighter black jeans, black button-up, black blazer - couldn’t go wrong there. ***

YN had texted him asking what she should wear for their first date when Harry told her he was going to keep it simple and take her to a restaurant.

He had to dress nice, it was an expensive restaurant that he had not taken any other dates to before, it was right outside of London - going towards the countryside with a beautiful view of a meadow and stream.

When he had arrived in front of her apartment, well he had never been on this side of town, and it quite frankly looked like the roof of her building was about to collapse at any minute. It was rough to say the least.

Harry had picked out a car he thought would impress her. He remembered her saying the doors of his Lamborghini were stupid so he picked a car with normal doors this time. It was his new Audi Quattro that had cost him upwards of 170,000 pounds. ***

YN had popped out of the front door, her face didn’t read impressed when she saw the car like he had hoped. It was interesting before YN, he did not care whether or not his dates were impressed by him - now he craved it.

She looked extraordinary in a form fitting silky black dress that hugged every single curve of her body perfectly while accentuating them at the same time. Minimal makeup, loose waves, and simple high heels - it was like a dream that he was taking this girl out on a date. ***

When she slips into the passenger seat, the smell of her floral yet cinnamon perfume makes the car smell heavenly, she looks over at him and says, “You didn’t even come open the door for me. We’re off to a bad start, Harry.”

His heart sinks, fuck - he had been blindsided by her beauty that he wasn’t even being a proper gentleman, “M’so sorry, I wa-”

She chirps out a tender laugh, patting his arm, “You’re face, oh my god. I was just fucking with you.”

Harry’s frown turns into a pout, “S’not nice, pet.”

YN shrugs before a bit self-consciously adjusting the fabric around her midsection, “Erm, I hope this outfit is nice enough? It’s really the only semi-decent thing I own.”

He shakes his head in disbelief, “Y’look absolutely stunning. I can’t even believe y’real to be honest, so fuckin’ pretty.”

YN gives him a shy, unsure smile but he can tell she’s preening at the compliment internally (which she totally is).

The restaurant is one of the nicest in England, let alone London. 

There wasn’t even a menu, they just served eight courses over a few hours time by servers in suits with bowties on. 

YN had never felt more out of place.

As they sat down, Harry was proud that he was able to show off his abilities for a good date, YN was looking around nervously before looking up at the server and saying, “We didn’t get menus yet.”

The man gives her a humorous expression before telling her, “We don’t do menus here, miss. Your date is a regular, I am sure he can fill you in. However, we are starting off with a Cabernet from 2001 imported from Napa, California.”

As he pours the wine into their sparkling glasses, she asks unknowingly, “I don’t really like wine. Is there any way I could get a Coke?”

Harry frowns when the server laughs meanly at her, “Ma’am this isn’t McDonald’s. We do not carry soda. I can provide you with water, if you so wish.”

Harry can’t help but snap at the waiter, “Oi, she’s never been here before. Lay off with the attitude alright?”

“My apologies, Mr. Styles,” He murmurs obediently before finishing the pouring off the whine and retreating from the table.

YN is trying to hide how uncomfortable she is but it is still obvious with how she fidgets in her seat, doesn’t quite know what to do with her hands as she doesn’t even bother to reach towards the wine glass.

“This isn’t really your scene, is it?” Harry murmurs, embarrassment with his failure to impress her with an expensive car and dinner. 

It was falling flat and it was the only thing he knew how to do - flaunt his wealth, everyone else had always been impressed.

“No, it isn’t,” She agrees quietly, fingers folding the edges of the cloth napkin to keep her anxiousness directed somewhere, “I appreciate this, er, dinner. I thought we were going to go somewhere like Mary’s.”

Mary’s was a restaurant that was considered ‘nice’ to the commoners in the city. It was a bit more expensive than a pub and the attire was a bit fancier than if you were going out to a bar. 

For someone like Harry, that was not considered a fancy restaurant. 

However, YN was not him and this was not something that she had ever been accustomed to. He now definitely felt like an idiot.

It’s made even worse when a massive plate is put in front of each of them. 

The plate is huge but the dish is merely one scallop with a lemon sauce and sprinkle of parsley on top. YN can’t even try to hide her confusion at the food.

 “I’ve mucked this date up,” Harry sighs, nearly thirty minutes into the actual date. 

YN had taken a small bite of the scallop before setting down her fork and not touching it again - it tasted like dirty feet. Did rich people like that taste?

She decides not to answer directly, “I already know you have money. It doesn’t ‘wow’ me. I was hoping for a fun date, this is….nice but quite truthfully, not for me. I prefer a pub or bowling - this feels more like a business meeting.”

Harry usually doesn’t have dates that are this honest with him. 

He feels embarrassed but he really did appreciate her honesty. He should have known to do something different than this but he was comfortable with his normal pattern.

“Can we get out of here?” YN asks, placing the napkin back on the table and gathering up her small purse to swing over her shoulder.

He feels defeated as he nods, paying for the meal in full as he accepts that he’s fucked up the date beyond repair by being an arrogant, ignorant asshole who doesn’t truly know how to talk to a girl he likes.

It’s quiet as he starts the car and pulls back onto the road, he startles a bit when YN points to a glowing sign of a golden arch and demands, “Go there.”

With a bit of confusion, Harry pulls into the McDonald’s parking lot and then to the drive-thru as she motions for him to do so. 

God, he hasn’t been to a fast food joint in years now if he was being honest.

When they pull up to the screen, YN leans across and shoots out their food order with ease before sitting back with a smug smile, “We’re going to have a date my way.”

Harry sighs with relief when he realizes the date isn’t over - but really just beginning. They sit and chat in the parking lot. He is thoroughly impressed when YN manages a box of nuggets, a fry, and a milkshake without shame.

Not like she should be shameful - just usually on dates women were hesitant to actually eat and instead picked carefully at their food instead. Their conversation in the car is bright, at some points deep and meaningful, but refreshing. It made him feel young again.

After they finished eating, she’s ordering him to drive a bit further out into the country where he can’t help but make the joke, “Are y’taking me somewhere to kill me?” YN smiles happily with a wide grin, “You’ll just have to wait to see.”

It ends up being a lake. A beautiful body of water that was surrounded by trees that were being reflected into the ripples with the light of the moon. The only sounds were of crickets chirping and the light lapping of the water against the small shore. ***

“I used to come here a lot in the summer in high school,” YN murmurs as Harry takes in the scenery of everything. It had been so long since he had appreciated nature - not the bright clear waters in the tropics but something like this.

“S’beautiful,” Harry replies, can’t help but observe this girl he’s infatuated beauty in the moonlight. 

Her skin looks like it’s glowing, the moon sparkling off the twinkle of her iries, and she just looked...ethereal. Like she belonged in the beauty of the wilderness.

He couldn’t believe his eyes - had to blink harshly a few times to make sure he’s not imagining it when she pulls the thin straps of her dress down her shoulders and shimmy the garment down her body until she’s left in a delicate lace bra and cheeky pair of underwear.

Harry, always the gentleman, keeps his eyes (with effort) on her face. Unsure of what is going on in her mind before she turns around with a little run and dives headfirst into the deep waters before popping back up and giggling, “Jump in!”

She’s just so...carefree, adventurous. Harry hadn’t felt free in fucking years.

It has him shucking out of all of his clothing, just down to his tight black briefs before he’s diving in, right next to her, and feeling around. He wraps his hand around her ankle to teasingly tug her under with him before they both surface.

As they wad in the water, YN swims over to him, and wraps her legs around his waist, arms around his neck. Her soaking wet hair was dripping and he was breathing heavy, feeling his ribcage expand against her soft tummy.

She murmurs quietly over the light lapping over the water, “You haven’t even looked at me once.”

Harry swallows, feeling like a schoolboy again, “I...I didn’t want to without permission.”

“I want you to look at me,” YN replies, letting her nose nudge his and her eyes searching into his nervous ones. 

He nods, closing his eyes when he feels her lips brush his, letting his large palms grip at her sides and pull her closer to his chest. Their lips not breaking when his hands begin to explore the intricate, plush curves of her body.

They don’t do anything else, don’t go any further but he groaning when she traces her fingertips down his muscular, defined abs and thumb rubbing over the trail of light hair leading into his briefs.

After a swim, filled with splashing and dunking, they retired to lay in the grass. Both of their backs, looking up at the clear night sky, moon full and stars glittering against the stark darkness that surrounds it.

YN wriggle until she’s tucked into his side, hand running up and down his chest, as she says, “I’m sorry your date didn’t go as planned. I ruined it.”

“Y’didn’t ruin anything. I...I haven’t felt like this in a long time,” Harry admits as he gives off an embarrassed laugh, “I..I’m a little bit scared, to be honest.”

“Scared? Of what?” YN asks, lips pressing against a tattoo on his bare shoulder.

“Because I already am falling for you,” Harry utters, heart racing and his eyes glued upwards and pointedly not wanting to see her interaction.

“That’s a relief.”

His eyebrows shoot up, “A relief?”

“Yeah, I would say. I’m falling too,” YN whispers before leaning up to connect their lips once more as the moon rises further in the sky and the crickets sing a little louder. They lay like that for a very long time.

Harry went home that night for the first time not feeling the empty weight of his loneliness, instead he feel asleep imagining the beautiful, spontaneous girl next to him in his bed.

--

It wasn’t going to be the wedding everyone expected for The Harry Styles. **

There was not many invites set out for this event. It wasn’t the wedding of the century or the most expensive wedding of the decade.

Harry would have let his wife-to-be have this day however she wanted without complaint but could say he was very happy that it was going to a be a low-key event. It was going to be some of YN’s family, though she didn’t have much, and Harry’s extended family. No one from work or business. Just family.

They had just gotten finished with the rehearsal dinner, the couple being ordered to separate rooms for the final night before they were married. It was tradition. 

Harry had walked YN to her hotel room, they were staying at the venue, and pressed her up against the door. His hand coming to weave into her meticulously curled hair and cupping the back of her head, bring her mouth to his.

He wastes no time in letting his tongue find hers, hips coming to press her further back against the aged wood, and his teeth nipping roughly at her plump bottom lip, “Baby, y’gonna be m’wife tomorrow.”

YN’s eyes twinkle up at him like they did during their first date, “I can’t wait. I can’t wait to spend forever with you.”

His fiance laughs kindly as he gets a bit watery eyed, her thumb coming to swipe under his eye, she jokes, “Are you regretting proposing now?”

“Just never knew I could be this happy,” He murmurs against her lips, can’t help but reach around to grip a generous amount of her backside and pulling her flush against him where he’s hardening quickly.

“Mm, down boy. You don’t get the goods until tomorrow,” YN scolds, hand wrapping around his wrist and squeaking when he squeezes harder to get the point across - how much he wants her, all the fucking time.

“Want it now, pet,” Harry whines lowly, grinding his hips forward into her, “Give it t’me, y’mouth, y’cun-”

“Alright lovebirds! Separate now!” Gemma barks to interrupt with the laughter of their childhood friend Chloe.

They pull Harry by the back of the shirt and push him forward towards his room, Gemma smiles back at YN, “Make him put a ring on it before you give it to him!”

“Gem!” Harry scolds with a whine, giving his fiance puppy dog eyes and a pouted bottom lip, “Baby, don’t let them take me!”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, I love you!” YN shouts back, waving and smiling to herself as she opens up the door to her room and then locking it after she steps in. It feels weird being in a hotel room without him but she was a bit sweaty and her nerves were wiry so she decided a nice bath would be a good idea.

-

It’s past two in the morning and she was no less ready to find sleep. The worries of whether everything will be set up properly, if she’ll stutter during her vows, there were just so many things that could go wrong.

Life didn’t even seem real at this moment. 

She was marrying her husband at an amazing castle on the coast of italy with family to surround them in love. She had the perfect dress, the perfect flowers, the perfect partner. ***

She had never had it easy. Never thought she would deserve something like this. Harry had made her feel worthy of all this, they deserved to have a happy ever after. 

When it hits three in the morning, she can’t stand the quiet of the italian countryside anymore, and is swinging her legs over the bed. She pockets the keycard Harry gave her earlier in the day in her cotton shorts before sneaking out of her room.

After she taps the card to the sensor, the large oak doorknob clicks, she slips in and closes the door as silently as possible. YN steps in to the room, Harry's asleep in his bed on his stomach, face smushed into the pillow.

Harry’s facial expression and body language while he was awake was so severe, serious, intimidating. In sleep, his face was lax and his limbs loose. He looked more boyish when he was dreaming.

YN’s heart aches at how much she loves him, pulling the covers up, and crawling under them until she’s jostling him unintentionally, waking him from his light sleep with a mumble, “Baby, y’okay? Wha’s wrong? Y’alright?”

She giggles at his dazy panic, “I just missed you.”

“Mmm,” Harry agrees, pulling her all the way down and rolling on top of her, “Missed y’more.”

“You’re like a toaster!” YN squeals as he’s encompasses her, laying on her with his weight. His lips finding her pulse point and gently sucking. He was barely awake and he still couldn’t stop himself from her finding comfort in her body.

“I’m warmin’ y’up,” Harry growls against her neck before giving her a lick which has her giggling even more and pushing him off until he falls on his back and she’s swing her legs over his waist, straddling him.

“Y’breakin’ the tradition, m’heart.”

YN shrugs, humming while he palms at her belly, and she (much to his disappointment) ignores where he’s hard and waiting for her.

“I want t’sleep with you,” She pleas sheepishly, leaning all the way over to connect their lips in a quickie peck before she’s moving off of him and into his side.

“Never say no to you, y’know that, dovie,” Harry replies as if it’s obvious (it is).

“We’re getting married tomorrow,” YN whispers into the dark, like it’s a secret just between the two.

Harry nuzzles his nose against her temple, “Never wanted anythin’ more than I want you.”

YN can’t help but sniffle softly, overwhelmed with emotion and love, “You’re so good to me. I don’t deserve you.”

“You saved me. You saved me from myself, from where I was going. You gave me hope, feeling again. Y’are m’heart, it fuckin’ beats for you.”

It may not be tradition but YN wouldn’t of had it any other way, sleeping in a magnificent castle on the ethereal coast of Italy in a classic hotel room, and the excitement of their wedding rumbling in both of their stomachs.

--

“You sneaky bastards!” Bethany screeches, door flinging open with Gemma in tow as they intrude into Harry’s room - finding the couple curled up under the covers with Harry spooning YN with his face tucked into her hair.

“Fuck off,” Harry groans, pulling his fiance closer into his chest as she wriggles awake and whimpers lowly, “Mornin’ lovie.”

“Out out!” Gemma shoos, pulling the covers off of them and the sisters showing no mercy while they yank YN out of the bed and titter about how she needs to start getting ready, no time for cuddles, breaking traditions.

“Bring her back!” He whines childishly, hurling a pillow at his sister’s retreating back as they guide YN back to her own room.

“You’ll see her in a few hours!” Gemma shouts back before slamming the hotel room door and leaving Harry to doze off for just a few more minutes.

-

Hair and makeup went fast. 

It was getting closer and closer to actually walking down the aisle towards her soon-to-be life partner and she’s never felt more nervous.

Rosemary and Bethany were all rushing around - attempting to get ready in the midst of getting the bride ready.

YN didn’t want to look like a doll or have any intense makeup. It was a soft champagne smokey eye with dewy skin and a glowing highlight. A nice lip with a bit of glittering gloss.

Her hair was in big, loose curls that cascaded down her back with the front pulled off of her face. A real white flower holding it back.

Then it was the dress. She was anxious about whether Harry would like it or not. She wasn’t sure what he was expecting her to wear - a massive ball gown, a form-fitting mermaid, or something less over-the-top?

It was a show-stopper that had her memorized when she had first seen it - could automatically imagined herself getting married in Italy with this on her body.

It was also one of the only times she didn’t even care about the price tag - she knew this was it. Yes, it was absurd to spend fifty thousand pounds on a dress but it was the one time she took advantage of Harry’s wealth.

It was flowy, reminding her of the soft waves that lapped at the coast of the italian beaches. It was sophisticated, classy with a sharp starch white that billowed into a dreamlike beauty.

What had made her fall in love was the sheer, detailed sleeves that gave the dress more of a vintage, glamour appearance than the modern tight-fit, overly sexy gowns that most brides wore nowawadays. ***

The train was long and sleek. It would trail beautifully down the aisle before being bustled for the reception. It made her feel confident in a way that an item of clothing next had made her feel before.

“Your tits look amazing,” Bethany compliments before giggling when their grandmum pinches her arm for her crude language.

YN couldn’t find it in her to laugh. She felt like her voice was stuck in her throat and it wasn’t moving. 

It started to feel real.

The fact that Harry had proposed, had planned a wedding with her, that he was agreeing to marrying her today.

It was starting to scare her - no, not cold feet but anxiety that he would realize that he could do better than the lowly waitress.

Now, on a normal day, she wouldn’t be having these irrational thoughts. Today was different and it felt too good to be true.

Rosemary and Bethany sense the tension in the room, rub her shoulders, and respect her wishes when she asked for a moment alone.

YN debates picking up her phone, knowing he was busy with his bigger side of the family in the groom’s suite.

She finds herself picking up her mobile, dialing his number, and waiting with bated breath for his syrupy, warm voice to pour through the speaker.

“Everythin’ okay?” He answers, she can hear Anne and Gemma tittering about in the background, yelling at him to get a move on.

“I’m scared,” YN whispers, she holds back her tears because the last thing she wanted to do was ruin her meticulous makeup.

“Leavin’ me at the altar?” Harry jokes lowly, stepping away from prying ears.

YN giggles at his teasing tone, “Never. I…I feel like this is all too good to be true. Like it’s a dream and I’m going to wake up.”

Harry huffs, “Sweetheart. Y’my soulmate, if y’wake up - I’m right there with you, okay? God, if anyone is dreamin’ it’s me. I get t’marry the most beautiful, intelligent -“

Gemma’s voice interrupts him, “You already seduced her into marrying you! We don’t have time for this sweet talk!”

The line goes dead but YN feels much better now.

—

Rosemary was going to be the one walking her down the aisle to her new husband. It didn’t feel right to have anyone else do it as she was the one who raised her into the strong, independent woman she was today.

YN knew she wanted to have an outside wedding. 

What would be more perfect than a cool evening in Italy? It was what she had dreamed about since she was little without the idea that it would ever happen.

The weather was absolutely perfect. There was a slight warm breeze that would keep the guests from being overheated, the sun was peeking in and out of vibrant white clouds that complimented the blue sky.

She knew exactly where Harry would be standing. 

Underneath a beautiful, dated archway with intricate designs about. 

The old material had lovingly grown luscious ivy that kissed the walls in a swirling, natural design. 

YN would never forget how beautiful that ivy had looked on her wedding day, encompassing the magnificent that was her soon-to-be husband.***

The venue was open, airy but still gave off an intimacy. There weren't many rows of chairs because not many were invited to share in such an ethereal experience where soulmates have found each other and were announcing their commitment to the world.

“Are you ready, my daughter?” Her grandmother had asked quietly as they lined up behind the expansive, old brick wall that hides them from the rest of the ceremony and crowd. She could hear the whispering as people took their seats.

YN nods, her vocal cords refusing to cooperate as she imagines Harry just as nervous on the opposite side with his family. 

When the twinkling, traditional music begins from the small orchestra off to the side - the realization hits her - it is actually happening, right now.

Bethany puts her bouquet in front of her, giving one last meaningful smile at her sister before she takes her cue to turn the corner and begins her walk down the aisle. 

It meant Harry was up there, watching as she was about to appear.

Then the orchestra’s melody became louder, more grand in the signaling for the guests to stand and turned toward the back of the room - awaiting the bride’s entrance to the ceremony. 

Rosemary takes the initiative to hook their arms and guide her past the wall.

YN clutches onto her own flowers as if it’s her lifeline. ***

Every fear, insecurity, moment of self-doubt dissipates when her eyes connect to Harry’s. There is no longer a doubt in her mind that she wasn’t enough. It was a deep, unbreakable stare as Harry’s mouth parts in a gasp of awe.

He was in a suit that was undeniably him. It displayed how fucking regal he was, how it looked like he was handcrafted into the italian design, how it fit him just perfectly.

It wasn’t a normal tuxedo. It was a perfectly tailored, custom (of course) Gucci suit that excentuate his broad shoulders and the nip of his narrow hips *** ***. 

YN can’t even hear the noise of the guests - whispering about how beautiful she looks.

All she can see is her future husband, who swallows harshly as an unexpected sob wracks through his chest at the sight of his bride.

The guests can’t help but look with wide eyes as the man they know - who they’ve barely ever seen smile, let alone cry, cannot control his emotions.

Gemma, who was his ‘best man’ which they deemed ‘best woman’, rubs his back soothingly with a watery smile herself at seeing her brother so estastatic as he looks at the woman of his dreams.

Harry rubs his eyes before meeting hers again.

YN is holding back her own tears as she reaches the end of the aisle.

In tradition as old as time, Harry steps forward and Rosemary passes her hand over to him in a signal that she trusts him to take care of the girl she’s spent meticulous time raising and cultivating into the person she is today.

“I trust you to take care of my girl, she is now yours,” Rosemary tells Harry, her tone is calm and full of emotion as she allows Harry to lean over to kiss her cheek softly.

Harry nods, his usually stable voice shaky as he replies, “I promise, I’ll take care of her until the day I die.”

Rosemary nods before patting his cheek and finding her seat in the audience.

When they are finally standing face-to-face, YN reaches over to thumb off a stray tear that was sliding down his cheek before he turns his head to kiss her thumb then kissing her palm. 

Harry didn’t even acknowledge that there was anyone else watching - it was just him and her.

“Y’look breathtaking, can’t believe y’mine,” Harry murmurs trembling, his chest moving faster than usual and it felt like it was nearly impossible for him to catch his breath as he looked at the woman in front of him.

When it comes to the vows, Bethany hands over her small piece of paper that she had scribbled onto and scratched out multiple times - never quite able to get the wording just right and she says just that.

“I couldn’t find the right words to explain my love for you,” She starts, voice raspy as she looks up to see Harry watching her raptly, eyes intense and only focused on her.

“And maybe there aren’t even words to explain it because nothing felt like enough. It is how I feel a lot of the time with you. I’ll never have enough of you because you’re all-consuming to me. I have never felt happiness like I have with you.”

YN is trying to stifle her tears as she continues, Harry reaches out to rub her arm in reassurance then he lightly brushes over the new necklace he had gifted her, “You’re by far the most complex, closed-off person I have ever met. I feel like you’ve allowed me to crack the code and once I did, I wasn’t disappointed. I’ve cracked my own code, you see.”

“The code to explaining my feelings for you will come with my dedication, love, loyalty to be your wife for the rest of our lives.”

Harry can’t help what he does next despite it not falling in line at the ceremony.

His hands come up to cup her jaw and he sears his lips to hers, kissing her with all the passion and emotion he cannot seem to keep in any longer. It’s too much, has to show her in that moment how much he loves her.

A few of his uncles whistle from the crowd as their wives smack their chests in warning.

YN giggles, returning the kiss before pushing him off. 

The look in his eyes is one she knows extremely well - it sends shivers down her spine and makes her hair stand on end -, the stare down of lust and want.

“Mr. Styles,” The officiant redirects, nodding towards the piece of paper he has in his hand.

“Yeah, sorry,” Harry mumbles, unraveling the wrinkled notecard he had tucked in his inner suit pocket.

“I knew I was in love with you the moment you spilled that drink on me and undressed me in that dodgy employee bathroom,” Harry says with full sincerity, smirking at YN’s blush when he brings up the way they met.

“I tried to talk myself out of it. It was impossible to fall in love in mere minutes of meeting someone but it was the truth. I knew after our first date that I wanted y’to be m’wife. I knew after the second that I wanted y’to be the mother of my babies one day. And by the third date, I was planning on buying you a ring.”

“It sounds insane because it is. I’ve never been an impulsive, spur-of-the-moment, hopeful person before you. You made me throw all that out of the window, you make me feel alive, and when I tell you that you saved me. You saved me, m’love.”

“There is a lot of uncertainty in this world but I can tell you one thing that is absolutely fuckin’ certain -”

“Harry,” YN hisses with an eye-roll at his crude language.

“The one thing that is absolutely certain in this world is that I will always love you, always take care of you, and always do everythin’ in m’power to make you happy.”

The guests in the chairs are quite speechless. 

They’d never heard such passionate, meaningful vows from a couple. 

This was not what they were expecting of Harry who had never once put his heart on his sleeve and right now he’d laid it all out on the table.

--

“YN LN, do you agree to take Harry Edward Styles as your husband? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, until the end of your time on earth?” The officiant asks, voice ringing against the walls of the castle.

YN has to take a big breath before she replies in a strong, firm voice as her eyes bore into Harry’s, “I do.”

“Harry Edward Styles, do you agree to take YN MN LN as your wife? To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, until the end of your time on earth?” The officiant repeats.

Harry, in ever typical fashion, in his loud, booming voice replies, “Of course I fuckin’ do.”

The guests in the audience laugh lightly as the officiant states, “I now announce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Styles. You may now kiss your bride.”

It doesn’t take more than a second for Harry to step forward, grip her face and pull her in for a kiss, it doesn’t matter that their family is there to him as he licks into her mouth which is bordering on obscene before YN brings it back to a softer, more appropriate one.

He whispers against his lips, barely audible, “Can’t believe y’my fucking wife, m’fucking heart.”

--

As people are moving towards the reception area, Harry manages to find a secluded area of the outside gardens where there is no one in sight.

“Baby, baby, y’married me,” Harry is nearly chanting, like he’s in disbelief, at the same time he’s cornering his new bride up against the brick wall with his mouth trailing sloppy wet kisses down her shoulder.

“Mmm, it was everything I ever imagined, it was so beautiful. Everything I had imagined for our day,” YN replies blissfully, hands running carefully through his meticulously styled hair.

When he bends down and lifts up the bottom of her dress, she giggles when he ducks his head underneath all the tulle and fabric, finding a very skimpy pair of white lace panties that are supposed to be saved for later.

“Harry,” YN scolds half-heartedly, it would only take one person to find them in this undeniable inappropriate situation but she willingly let him push her further against the brick and take one of her legs over his shoulder.

“Baby, these fuckin’ panties,” He groans, muffled by the barrier of the heavy fabric, and she hisses when pulls them down to the thick of her thighs and his mouths finds her center within moments.

“Fu-fuck,” She hisses, trying to keep her moans down as he wastes no time in pushing in two thick fingers to curve towards her front as his tongue laps quickly and sloppily on her clit until it feels like she’s about to explode.

“S’right, fuckin’ m’cunt. I have it f’the rest of my life, found the best one,” Harry mutters against her wet skin, almost to himself like he can’t even believe the words, before he’s back to speeding up his fingers to match the rhythm of his mouth until she’s quivering for a whole other reason now.

It takes a few minutes for Harry to calm himself down enough to be able to go into the reception, he tells YN that he can’t even look at her right now because if he does he’ll be perpetually hard throughout the whole thing.

--

The reception is more of a dinner than a party. 

Fairy lights strung above the two long tables where decadent, mouth-watering food was served with the orchestra playing light, melodic music in the background. ***

It was perfect. 

Their family drank, laughed, ate, and were merry. 

Everyone was basking in each other’s company, congratulating the new couple, and enjoying all the beauty that was surrounding them at the castle. 

There is not much more to say than that. 

--

The honeymoon suite was located on one of the highest floors of the castle, away from all of the other wedding guests and staff.

YN was sure it was beautiful but from the moment she was carried over the threshold, she didn’t see anything but her new husband - he was blinding in his beauty. His skin was glowing, a slight sheen of sweat from the reception, and the still warm bite in the breeze. ***

“Sweetheart, baby. Please let m’undress you, y’my wife,” Harry pleas softly, his hands are everywhere - her face, her shoulders, hips - continuously wandering as if it’s impossible to find one place to settle.

“Please, c’mon. I need you, H,” She agrees, letting him take down the zipper on the side of her gown.

The expensive garment discarded on the floor in a pool of fabric as he fully takes in her lingerie set. ***

“Fuck me, darlin’,” Harry chuckles in amazement, fingertips tracing over the delicate lace that was stitched by Alessandro Michele himself for the bride, "Y’body is a god damn dream, look at you. - fuck.”

“Please,” His wife whimpers, voice desperate as his light and careful touches are no longer enough. 

She needs him close, she needs her husband.

“Okay, okay,” He simpers, moving her back until he can have her right where he wants her, on her back in the middle of the massive, blanket-ridden bed - her white lingerie standing out against the dark duvet.

Harry had always imagined this night. 

To have someone laid out underneath him. 

No rush, no urgency but to truly, physically show that person through touch that you love them.

He starts near her collarbone, feathery heated kisses that warm her skin as she welcomes him with heavy weight on top of her so eager he wasn’t even undressed yet.

When his mouth finds her nipples through the sheer fabric, she pushes her chest up in encouragement as he bites at the nubs with sharp but careful teeth that wet the fabric.

“It feels so good, baby,” YN mewls, letting him nip and suck for a moment before pushing him up until he’s rid of every inch of fabric that had been covering his body.

“M’always gonna make y’feel good. I’ll fuck you wherever, wehenver cause you’re m’wife,” Harry grunts, impatiently reaching behind to unclasp the corset until her breasts spill free and jiggle in a way that makes his mouth water.

“Wait, wait,” YN puts a hand to his cheek when he already has his mouth darting out to lap at her hardened nipple.

“Don’t make me wait, m’heart,” Harry grumbles with a furrowed brow, his hand still unable to stop from reaching up to palm at her full breasts, thumbs rolling the nipples as he stares fiercely up at her.

“You know how you got me a present?” YN murmurs, biting back a whimper when a zip of electricity shoots from her nipple down to where she’s already dripping for him, “I got you something too.”

Harry’s face relaxes, it’s like he finds his grounding again, “Baby, didn’t need t’get me anythin’. Y’the best fuckin’ gift I could have gotten. Does look beautiful sittin’ between y’tits though.”

His new wife giggles, “Well I really hope you like mine….it’s non-refundable.”

He looks at her with confusion even more so when she wriggles down her panties and flips on her belly with her arms resting under chin.

Of course, Harry finds it immediately and she can tell by the deep, pleased growl he emits from the back of his throat, “You fuckin’ didn’t.”

“I did.”

It was his name, small and cursive right on her bum cheek. 

After they got engaged, he went out and got her name tattooed on his pec - much to her dismay. 

She had never talked about returning the favor and had kept it the ultimate surprise.

“I think I almost just came from this,” Harry rasps, his fingers tracing the small ink over and over in awe, “Baby, y’put m’name on your bum. It makes y’look like my property, sweetheart.”

“I am yours,” YN giggles, yelping when she feels his teeth graze the sensitive skin before he’s suckling and licking at his name - can’t take his eyes off the beauty of her.

“Yeah, you fuckin’ are,” He agrees whole-heartedly, his hands calming to cup and palm at her cheeks as he fawns over his wedding present, “This is the best present I’d ever fuckin’ received, fuck - never goin’ to get over this.”

He doesn’t want to look away from the tattoo but knows how he wants to fuck his wife for the first time so he flips her onto her back once again, lips finding hers. 

She whispers, hand wrapping around his cock, “Still have to pay you back for earlier.”

“No blowies tonight, pet. We’re goin’ to do it the right way, m’gonna make love to you,” Harry murmurs, his lips finding hers as he bats her hand away to grasp at his thick base. He teases the sensitive head over her clit and entrance a few times before slowly sinking in.

“Ohh, been ready for you all day. You looked like a fucking wet dream standing at the alter, waiting for me,” YN sighs happily, wriggling her hips to adjust a bit before she spreads her legs and lets Harry rest in between them, “Ever since I saw you in the suit, I’ve been waiting.”

“Yeah, baby? I can tell, y’so wet, warm f’me,” Harry praises, his movements are slow and unrushed, their hips meeting gently as he pushes in each time with care, “Can’t believe y’gonna let me have this for the rest of m’life.”

“I love you so so much,” She utters breathlessly as he continues to make her feel so fucking full - emotionally and physically, “Best husband ever, can’t believe it.”

Harry chuckles tenderly, “Baby, I need y’to come soon. I’m so close, never come this quick. The thought of y’being my wife is making it impossible to last then with the tatto-”

YN soothes his hair in understanding, pushing up to meet their lips and allow their tongues to dance as he lifts her thigh against his hip to thrust in with a bit more force. His thumb comes to her clit to spur her along which doesn’t take much with how aroused she’s been all day.

Harry follows right after, much to his embarrassment of his lack of stamina but can you blame him? He has the hottest fucking wife on the planet.

“Round two?” YN smirks as he leans down to pepper kisses all over her cheeks. She knows the night has just begun.

“Mmm,” He agrees instantly, “Now that we made love, m’gonna fuck y’from behind so I can watch my name jiggle on your arse.”

And that’s what he does. It takes nearly no rebound time, flips her on her belly again to gaze and worship his name as he fills out in no time again. His fingers occasionally dip back between her thighs to tease at her entrance before he swipes her own wetness on the tattoo to lick it off.

She’s tired, exhausted from the events of the day but wants to reach that last orgasm before sleep overtakes them. 

On her hands and knees, Harry doesn’t pound into her like he normally would. 

Instead, he eases back in with eyes darting between his wedding present and where they’re connecting, his thumb diligently rubbing hard and steady circle on her nerves.

“C’mon wifey, need y’to not be stubborn,” Harry goads, feeling his release coming again - he pinches her clit with just enough pressure that has her whining before Harry has to hold her up by the waist as she quivers.

It has him finishing right after with a gentle smack to her bumcheek, the skin already tender and sore from all of his attention on the spot as it was.

“I loved your vows,” YN murmurs against his chest. He had wrapped her up in one of the plush blankets and he had pulled on a tight pair of briefs and they were laying on a lounge chair on the blacony under the italian stars.

“I loved yours just as much, y’did crack the code m’love ‘cause now I’m yours forever,” Harry rumbles, his voice raspy with drowsiness.

Little did they know that in a few short years, they would be back under these italian stars with knowledge that they were growing a little product of their love in her belly.

A litte baby named Ivy, just like the beautiful, lucious nature that had decorated the place in magneificent as they spoke vows - dedicating their lives to each other.

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[thenatashamaximoff]

Broken Love; Ch. 5

Summary: You and Natasha break up after finding out about her secret affair. Wanda’s there to comfort you.

Pairing: Natasha x Reader; Wanda x Reader

Warnings: cheating, implied sexual harassment

Words: 11,100

✎ | ❦

Please keep in mind that this is a reimagined version of Dangerous Love and it goes a completely different route. Please do not expect anything to be the same aside from the love triangle aspect. I hope you enjoy!

you do not have permission to repost/translate my work or claim them as your own.

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Wanda could feel the daggers Natasha was sending her with her piercing green eyes, but her attention was glued to the door you had just walked out of as it slowly closed shut behind you. She crossed her arms over her chest tightly, turning to face the glaring redhead. She was blocking the door, preventing Natasha from chasing after you even though she, herself, had the urge to do just that. You weren't okay, she didn't need to be a mind reader to see that, but she knew you'd come to her whenever you're ready… right?

Maybe it was a bad idea to confess her feelings, at least right now. Maybe breaking up with Vision could've been put on hold, though she knew the last thing she needed right now was his constant pestering. As much as she enjoys the android's presence, she needed space to think. Just like how you needed space to process your thoughts, having only been a couple of weeks since breaking up with your long-term girlfriend. Now was not the time to feel pressured into being in another relationship. Wanda needed to let you know that was the last thing she wanted to do, that she was willing to wait.

But she just couldn't get the heated kiss between you and her off of her mind. It didn't matter how hard she tried to focus on Vision and the date at the time, her thoughts always went back to you. And she couldn't help but smile when she saw you walk through the front door later that day, how cautious you were as you thought about every single thing thrice before saying it… you were scared you were going to trigger a response to her recently breaking up with him, not wanting to throw salt in the fresh wound. But… she just didn't care. Not about Vision, not about the break up, not about anything except you. Because when she saw you walk through the front door earlier, the small, cautious smile you had on your face, all she wanted to do was feel that heat once more. All she wanted to do was bring your face in between her hands and kiss you again.

"Why did you break up with Vision?" The question was accusatory, Natasha knows why Wanda suddenly broke up with him. By the time focused on the redhead, she saw the anger written on her face; the set jaw, the narrowed pupils, the flared nostrils. She wanted verbal confirmation that her suspicions were right. "You two seemed happy."

"It just wasn't working." It was the same excuse she had given Vision, not wanting to break his heart even more than necessary. She found the mind reading deal between you and her to be annoying at times, knowing that if she had just broken the agreement and read your mind, she would've saved the android some grief. He doesn't deserve any of this. She wouldn't have been taken off guard by the sudden kiss - hell, she probably would've been the one to make the first move if she had known you were contemplating it. She wouldn't have left you alone after you had asked her to just stay.

Natasha wasn't as accepting with her reason as Vision had been, less patient and more irritated. Wanda can see the growing frustration on the former assassin's expression, her muscles tightening over her chest. "I screwed things up with her," Natasha pointed out, Wanda furrowing her eyebrows in confusion at the calm tone the redhead was using. Her voice didn't match her expression at all. "And I'm trying everything I can to make it up to her, but you… would be better for her, I'm adult enough to see that."

It was the last thing Wanda expected to hear: approval. It was the last thing she was seeking. She didn't need Natasha's approval to do anything, though it was courteous. To Natasha, the feelings Wanda held for you were always as clear as a sunny day. It was painfully obvious, and she got lucky that you didn't see it as visibly as she did. 

"But that doesn't mean I'm going to stop fighting for her. Don't expect me to just give her up so easily."

"You gave her up a long time ago," Wanda stated, her hands resting on her hips. "You surrendered one of the best people this universe has to offer… and for what? Attention? Insecurity? Low self-esteem?"

"You wouldn't understand."

Wanda shook her head. "No, I don't think I would ever understand because I wouldn't do that. Certainly not to someone as pure and bright as Y/N."

"I know I hurt her-"

"You didn't just hurt her, Nat," Wanda exclaimed, too worked up to process the door opening behind her, too distracted to notice Natasha's eyes flickering to something over her shoulder, not processing the subtle shake of her head. "You smashed her heart, shattered her trust. You broke her." And though she seemed to be joking about it at the time you told her what she did, the desire to physically hurt Natasha Romanoff just as much as she emotionally hurt you was strong ever since you uttered those teeth-grinding, fist-clenching, anger-inducing words. She's been cheating on me.

"I get it, Wanda," Natasha stated, the angry demeanor she had been holding onto evaporating. Pain was shown in her green irises, her face fell with sadness. And as her shoulders slumped and her muscles loosened, she would think that Natasha truly regrets her actions. But she knew better, knowing she did it three times on several different occasions.

"I don't think you do," Wanda retorted, anger clear in her now-thick Sokovian accent. "You can keep apologizing to her, but you and I both know you don't regret doing it. You only regret getting caught."

"That's not true-"

“If Y/N hadn't caught you, would you have done it again?"

The question lingered in the air between both of them, thick and heavy. Wanda wanted to know what was going on inside her head when the inquiry was said, the desire to read her mind was stronger than the urge to hurt her, but she refrained. The silence that plagued the room told the witch everything she needed to know, but she still waited. With her hands resting on her hips, the seconds continued to slither by as Natasha tried to gather her jumbled thoughts and give her the answer she already knew.

"No, I wouldn't." Wanda couldn't help but roll her eyes at the Russian's lie. She took way too long in between to come up with a three-worded fib, using the time to make sure of her answer.

"You hesitated." She shouldn't have hesitated.

"Wanda-"

"You did it three times, Nat," Wanda sneered, her ability to withhold her anger was shattering. Her arms fell to her sides, her jaw tightened so hard, the sound of it locking in place seemingly echoed throughout the room.

"I regret my actions," she said confidently, but she wasn't looking at Wanda when she said it, "and if I can go back and stop myself from doing it, then I would. I love-"

"Don't you dare say you love her. I'll-"

"Hey, uh… Nat?" Bruce's voice cut through the conversation when he saw Wanda clench her hands into tight fists, the small but threatening step she took towards Natasha was enough to pull him out of his haze and speak up. "Steve needs to see you." He didn't know if Natasha saw the direction Wanda was going to take, and if she did, there was no indication of it. He figured Natasha could talk her way out of anything, but there's always the chance Wanda isn't going to listen to anything that spews out of her mouth. He wasn't going to risk it.

Wanda's back straightened at the sound of Bruce for a brief moment before she relaxed with realization. She nodded her head, a small, humorless smirk resting on her lips, as she crossed her arms over her chest. She doesn't know how long Bruce has been standing behind her, but Natasha was aware of his presence ever since he walked into the room. Her answers were formed to please him as much as they would please her. She needed to keep her options open in case you never forgive her.

She was more annoyed now than she was thirty seconds ago, and the longer Natasha displayed the expression of irritation at Bruce's interruption, the more annoyed she got. Wanda decided to give in, scanning Natasha's mind briefly, like skimming through the first page of a book. It didn't give her the answers she was seeking, the only thing on her mind - despite being under the deathly glare of a loyal witch - was you. All she wanted to know is if you were okay. She was mostly worried about the hidden symptoms of the car crash, the ones that the doctors wouldn't notice at first glance. Wanda wanted to be angry at Natasha, but there was a part of her that still deeply cares about you. And she had to respect that.

She just didn't have to like her.

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“Maybe I’ll just give up on women.” Your eyes flickered up to Steve, sitting at his desk as he focused intently on the computer screen in front of him. Dr. Woods wasn’t answering your calls, and you didn’t have the patience to go all the way to his home, so you had somehow found yourself in Steve’s office, interrupting the peacefulness he was relaxing in. “Hey, Steve… you single?”

He rolled his eyes as he looked from the computer to you, breathing out in annoyance as he pulled his hands away from the keyboard. “Other than avoiding your problems, why are you here?”

“What? Can I not hang out with my favorite patriot?” He blinked slowly, an eyebrow raised slightly at your defensive question.

"I'm not putting you back out on the field."

“You are completely absurd, Rogers. I am perfectly fine.”

He shook his head, turning back to the computer, and his soft laughter irritated you. Your eyebrows bunched together in frustration as you leaned back into the chair next to his desk, the clacking of his fingers hammering at the keyboard ticking a part of your brain that made you want to take it and smash it against his desk. He clearly wasn’t taking your request seriously, the desperate need to be out on the field felt like an itch that you just couldn't scratch, but he knew your true motives. He wasn’t a fool, he worked with you long enough to know what you’re up to. “You only want to come back so you can find valid excuses to avoid Wanda and Nat. I’m sorry, Y/N, but I’m not going to give you any reasons to circumvent these problems you're going through.”

“Steve-”

“Dr. Woods hasn’t cleared you yet,” he interrupted. “Until then, you’re still suspended.”

"Dr. W-"

"End of discussion, Y/N."

A frustrated sigh scratched at your throat as you sat up, turning towards him as much as the desk would allow you. You weren't going to drop it just yet. You wonder how far you can bend him until he breaks and gives you what you want. “Of all the favors I do for you, Rogers, you can’t just let me-”

“This is me doing you a favor,” he declared, looking at you once again. “If I put you back on the roster, there’s a high chance that you’ll be placed on an assignment with Natasha or Wanda or both, and where does that get you?”

“Then just don’t put me on a mission with them, it's as simple as that."

He sighed, scratching the bridge of his nose with his index finger as he leaned back in his chair. “Y/N-”

“Just one mission,” you pleaded. “Come on! One tiny little mission will not hurt anybody. You are worried about nothing.” You folded your hands together, batting your eyelashes at the man when he looked at you. But by the look on his face, he clearly wasn’t going to waver on his decision. You knew this was a form of helping you, but it didn’t make it less annoying. As right as it was to be suspended, you weren't going to admit defeat so easily. If Steve wasn't going to put you back on the team, you'll just have to find another solution, go over his head, especially since the good Dr. Woods wasn't going to be of assistance either.

“You did go on one tiny little mission and look where that got you,” he pointed out. 

“How did you-”

“I’m your emergency contact, Y/N, you really think they weren’t going to call me?”

You huffed, immediately regretting ever putting Steve Rogers down as your emergency contact, not even bothering to think that it would bite you in the ass. “They didn’t need to call you, I wasn’t dying.”

“It was a courtesy call,” he stated. “Trust me, I was surprised to find out that I, of all people, was your emergency contact.”

“Well, you’re also my power of attorney if that makes you feel better,” you muttered. He wasn’t biased, he would pull the plug on you if he saw fit. You didn’t want to force Natasha or Wanda to make that decision, you knew it’d destroy them. Hell, Wanda nearly had a heart attack when you were unconscious after the car crash. You needed to assign it to someone who wasn’t afraid to see you go, and Steve was the first person that came to your mind. Plus, it’d give the ladies someone to take it out on and you didn’t want to pit them against each other. It’s hard to stay mad at Steve for too long anyway. “Doesn’t that get me brownie points or something?”

“No.”

Maybe you’re wrong. You can definitely stay mad at Steve for a long time. “Steve-”

“The answer’s no, Y/N,” he declared. “You got yourself into this situation, get yourself out of it.”

You pursed your lips together, tugging against the hair tie around your wrist absentmindedly, losing yourself in thought as he resumed his work. The tension radiating off of him told you that he was finished with the conversation. Anything you say now was just going to get blatantly ignored, and you made it clear that you were mad at him by the groan of frustration you made while moving to stand up, though you were pretty sure half of that groan was from the wreck, physical pain still lingering throughout your body. “Fine,” you declared as you walked forward, stopping in front of his desk to turn and face him. You met his piercing blue eyes when he looked up at you. "I'm apparently not good at reading the room. I don't know when someone wants me around or not."

He sighed softly, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the desk. "Y/N-"

"Hell, it took me forever to realize that Nat doesn't want me anymore. And I had to find out the hard way." You could feel all the emotions from the past few days building up in your chest, wrapping around your heart and squeezing so hard, you could swear it's no longer beating. You tried your hardest to collect yourself, to keep that mask of happiness on your face, but when the annoyance evaporated from Steve's eyes, the calm and comforting gentle blues taking its place, you felt yourself beginning to break.

He released a soft, heavy sigh. He said your name again, but you couldn't register the way his voice came out as a warning, an attempt to get you to stop talking before whatever you were about to say would come back to bite you in the ass. Your mind was too caught up in trying to pat down the feelings rising in your throat.

You were failing miserably at it.

“Please,” you pleaded, pressing your palms against the surface of his desk and leaning forward. You breathed in slowly, releasing it even slower, as you stared at the keyboard inches away from your fingers. “I… She was the one, Steve. I was going to propose to her.” You couldn’t seem to get the words out, seeing the sentence in front of you, but not being able to grab it. You cleared your throat, shaking your head subtly as your eyes flickered to Steve’s. “I was planning on making her my wife while she was fooling around with...” You definitely couldn’t get around to saying his name, a curse that if uttered, he’d appear.

“Me.” A curse if thought, he’d also appear. It was a lose-lose situation. 

You froze at Bruce’s voice, straightening your posture as you listened to his heavy footsteps walk further into the room. As he reached over to place a tablet onto Steve’s desk, requesting the Captain’s signature, your eyes landed on the black hair tie around his wrist. Your jaw clenched tightly as both men stared at you carefully, sensing the anger forming in your chest. Bruce didn’t have long hair to require a hair tie, so there was really only one scenario that made sense in this situation… and it made your stomach twist in pain.

“Maybe I’ll just give up on dating.” You turned to leave the room, ignoring Steve’s calls for you as you closed the door behind you. You ran a hand down your face, huffing in frustration. You knew your face was red, fighting against the tears forming behind your eyes, the burning in your nose as you took a shaky breath. You could hear it in your heart, the cracking and crumbling. How many more hits were you willing to take before you completely snapped?

“Are you okay?” You couldn’t help but groan out in frustration when you heard her voice, pressing your palms into your eyes to smother the tears that were managing to form. Natasha was the last person you wanted to see right now. “Are you in pain?” It was a good thing you couldn’t see her right now to see her hand going towards you with the intention to comfort you, but she thought better of it at the last second and pulled her hand back to herself. “Y/N?”

You breathed deeply through your nose and released it slowly through your mouth, pulling your hands away from your face to look at her. She was concerned, her green eyes filled with worry as she stared at you with a soft expression. Her lips were pressed together lightly as she eyed your red face. “I am fine,” you expressed, stepping away from her. You hadn’t realized she had gotten so close, and you wanted nothing to do with her right now.

The band around your wrist seemed to be getting tighter, feeling as if it were cutting off all circulation to your hand, and you were quick to rip it off to give it to her, but she didn't move to take it. She was confused, knowing that you know when she wanted to put her hair up, and now was not the time she wanted to do so. “Y/N-”

“Use Bruce,” you said through clenched teeth, knowing that if you unlocked your jaw, you’d be a blubbering mess. And that was a luxury you couldn’t afford right now. 

“What are you-”

“I saw the hair tie around his wrist.” You laughed humorlessly, throwing your arms in the air as you shrugged. “You two seem to be a lot closer than you led me to believe.” You shook your head, your head tilting back so you could look at the ceiling. “And to think… to think I even considered getting back together with you.”

"It's just a hair tie, Y/N."

You stared at her, unblinking, as you took the moment to process her words. Just a hair tie. It was more than that… to you, at least. It symbolized your relationship with her, how you just instantly knew when she wanted to tie her hair up or to let it down without her saying a single word. It showed how linked the two of you were, but if she was sharing that with Bruce… maybe it wasn't as personal as you had originally thought.

"You are right," you agreed, nodding. Your voice was soft, small, and all you wanted to do was curl up in a ball and waste away. "It is just a hair tie." You sent her a brief smile, incapable of keeping the half-hearted grin on your lips, and you didn't give her a chance to say anything else as you plopped the hair tie into her hand, giving her no choice in taking it. And you could feel her eyes on you as you walked away.

The janitor's closet was the first private space you came across, ducking into the small room and closing the door quietly behind you. Your heart hammered in your chest as you wiped your palms onto your legs, tears burning your eyes. The sobs building in your throat begged to be released, your cheeks being colored red as you paced back and forth in the confined area. 

You fell to your knees, sobs escaping their prison and bouncing around the four walls as they shook your shoulders. Tears streamed down your face, your palms pressing against your forehead as you tried to will yourself to stop crying, but you couldn't seem to listen. The sobs only grew stronger in power, and your eyes produced tears faster than you can blink them away. You were unaware of the door opening and closing, your vision blurred, and you flinched when you felt a pair of arms wrap around you.

"It's okay." Wanda's Sokovian accent wasn't hard to misinterpret, and the softness in her voice only made you cry harder as she pulled you against her. You relished the feeling of her, the warmth flowing through your body as she squeezed her arms around you tightly. "I'm with you, Y/N, I got you."

Ten seconds ago, you never would've thought it was going to be okay. But now that she's here, holding you in her arms, consoling you without asking any questions as to why you were sitting in the middle of a janitor's closet, crying into her shirt and surely staining it with your tears... you knew she was right. You were going to be okay. And she was here to make sure of that.

You never knew how much you needed this until right now, her arms wrapped around you securely, your face buried in her shoulder, her hand absentmindedly rubbing your back in a soothing motion, this was required. The comforting sensation she brought to you managed to calm you down some. Because, right now, you are safe in the arms of someone who would never hurt you.

Maybe Natasha was right. It's just a hair tie. It's certainly not the end of the world… So why does it feel like it? If it wasn't for being engulfed by the warmth Wanda's bringing, you would've been worse. You felt the moment your world collapsed, but you weren't going to let yourself fall down with it. Not when she was here, holding onto your hand in the tightest of grips while you dangled off the cliff.

You pulled away from Wanda slightly, breathing out as she instinctively grabbed onto your shoulders. You sniffled, wiping away the drying tears once you were sure no more were going to stain your face. You stared into her green eyes with your watery ones, blinking slowly as she smiled warmly at you.

"Are you hungry?" Her voice was gentle, almost a whisper, and the smile only grew wider when you slowly nodded. You watched as she climbed to her feet and offered you her hand.

And the second you wrapped your hand around hers was the second you could feel your heart begin to mend itself into what it once was.

“I just want to go home, Wanda,” you said quietly as she pulled you to your feet. You tugged at your shirt nervously, fixing it under her kind stare. Maybe you could pop something in the microwave real quick. You just didn't want to be here. “I don’t want to-”

“We’ll go out,” she assured. You looked up at her, letting the warmth of her eyes flow through you. She admitted her feelings, the same feelings you had, so why was it so difficult?

“Wan-”

“We’re going out.” She started to walk away, making a beeline right for the door, and you disguised your laughter as a sigh as you followed her. You knew she wasn’t giving you a choice, that much was clear, and you weren’t willing to find out what she’d do if you persisted on going home. She’s not one to fear dragging you by your ankles if need be, you knew that. 

And as you followed her to the parking lot, you felt a sense of comfort washing over you. Could things go back to normal between you and her? There was some newfound hope in your step, climbing into her car with a small smile on your face.

But when you looked at her as she drove away from the compound, the way the late afternoon sun reflected off her face, making her eyes brighter and more mesmerizing, you started to wonder-

She glanced at you, smiling at you softly, briefly, before she had to turn her attention back to the road. "What?" Her soft laughter was music to your ears, sending chills up and down your spine.

"Nothing," you told her quietly, your smile widening as she reached over to turn the music on.

-if you even want things to go back to normal?

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You watched with furrowed eyebrows as she chewed on an Oreo, her eyes looking around the small café briefly before she landed on you. She mirrored your confused look, a small smile tugging her lips as her chewing slowed. “Did you just eat an entire Oreo at once like a heathen?”

She laughed lightly after swallowing the rest of the cookie, picking up her drink and taking a sip of it. “I’ve been eating Oreos for a long time, Y/N, I would think I know how they should be eaten.”

“Yes,” you agreed, nodding, “with milk.”

“I have milk.” She gestured to the cup in her hand, sending you a cheeky grin.

“Dunk the cookie into the milk, Wanda,” you explained. “It’s how the cookie was made to be devoured. You don't eat the cookie then take a sip of milk. You do it all at once.”

She maintained eye contact with you, an eyebrow lifting up into an arch as she picked up another Oreo off of her plate. You shook your head, mouthing a slow don't do it at her, but she continued anyway. You watched in mock horror as she popped the entire cookie in her mouth, listening to the crack of it in between her teeth, and her eyes closed as she did a little jig while she chewed. As annoyed as you wanted to be, you couldn’t help but take the opportunity of her closed eyes to smile as she hummed into the cookie. And to think… she has been this way her entire life and you’re just now noticing her the way she should’ve been noticed a long time ago. God, you're blind.

“You disgust me,” you exclaimed, shaking your head as her eyes fluttered open. “You have to-” Her laugh cut you off, making you break your serious façade for a moment as a smile cracked your face briefly before you shook your head and collected yourself. "You have to enjoy the cookie, Wanda."

"I am enjoying the cookie, Y/N," she expressed, swiping another one off of her plate. "All at once." She extended her arm, offering you the cookie. She wiggled it at you when you just stared at her and she smiled as she said, "Show me how to eat it."

You laughed, shaking your head. “I'm not going to-”

"Because you know I'm right."

You snatched the cookie out of her hand, quickly dunking it into her milk before she had time to react, laughing as you bit into it, taking half of the Oreo into your mouth. "See? I get to enjoy one cookie twice."

"That was unnecessary," she expressed, moving her cup closer to her as she blocked the top of it. You grinned at her, popping the rest of the cookie into your mouth as she looked down into her drink. "Look at all the little crumbs floating around."

You opened your mouth to retaliate, but her phone vibrating against the table drew your attention to her screen, Vision's name flashing briefly on it before she moved to reject the call. You sucked in a deep breath, looking behind her to see something to change the subject and the smile on your face returned. "Six o'clock," you said, nodding your chin towards the target. She subtly turned to look over her shoulder briefly before looking back at you with a smile mirroring yours. "Think he's waiting for a date?"

You glanced back at the man, properly dressed in a tux in the middle of a café. He fiddled nervously with the napkin resting in front of him, shredding it into perfect strips, and his shoulders moving dramatically as he tried to control his heavy breathing. The signs all screamed first date, his eyes darting back and forth between the napkin in his twiddling fingers and the baked goods displayed behind the glass counter. And, if you looked closely, you bet you'd see a droplet of sweat dripping down his forehead.

Wanda pursed her lips together as she looked back over her shoulder quickly, turning to you and shaking her head. "Business meeting."

You scoffed, rolling your eyes. "I thought you'd be better at this by now,"  you teased. "Nobody in their right mind would have a business meeting here. Of all places in New York."

The corner of her lips tugged up into a sly smirk as she stood up abruptly, the chair underneath her scraping across the floor as she dragged it around the table to settle next to you. You didn't have a chance to argue with her, the table too small for the both of you to fit on one side, but that little fact didn't seem to deter her. She was determined to get a better view of your subject, instantly throwing you off your game.

She sat close to you, her arm rubbing against yours no matter what she did, and the feeling of her caused you to internally panic. You weren't at any way prepared for this, the closeness, the touching, the heat. Your cheeks flushed and you were so damn grateful that she was putting all her attention onto the man in question. You'd be embarrassed by the amount of blood flowing through your face, having to clear your throat before you speak otherwise you'd know your voice would get caught in your throat.

"There's no way," you continued. You tore your eyes away from the man to look at her, your heart instantly freezing to see that she was looking at you, too, and you could feel her breath fan over your face when she laughed lightly. The urge to close the gap between your lips and hers at this moment was strong, you had to force yourself to look back at the man as her gaze remained burning the side of your face.

Act casual.

You knew there would be nothing of it if you had closed the distance. Her confession happened not that long ago, it was fresh on your mind, but there was still the lingering doubt in the back of your head. Was it real? The moment happened mere seconds before the car crash, it could've been a moment of weakness. You could've imagined it, your subconsciousness forming a conversation that never even happened.

Your thoughts were cut off when she leaned closer to you so she could whisper, "See?" You could've sworn her lips grazed against your ear, and you started to worry if she could hear the heavy thumping of your heart from where she sat. You'd be surprised if she couldn't. "I love winning."

Act. Casual.

You were so caught up in the unintentional intimate moment with her that you almost missed a second suited man joining the first one at the table. You blinked in confusion as the first man brought out a suitcase that he had resting on the chair next to him, something you wouldn't have been able to see from where you sat.

"Look at them." Wanda's elbow rested on the table as she subtly gestured to your new victim, two women settled at a table in the corner. They both wore dresses, though nothing as fancy as the two men in suits, it seemed to be more casual and relaxed, yet the one girl's movements told you she was just as nervous as the first man.

You decided to focus. You didn't want Wanda to win two in a row, that would surely never be let down. You scanned the nervous woman, seemingly incapable of sitting still. Her leg bounced rapidly, her fingers twirling around the brim of her empty mug, and she would sometimes glance towards the barista behind the counter. This one was painstakingly obvious, with the way her eyes would linger on the woman behind the counter. The woman was planning to break up with her current date because she found something in the barista.

"She's going to propose."

You couldn't help but scoff at Wanda's theory, turning to look at her with a raised eyebrow. Her smile was soft when she looked at you, excited for the proposal that clearly wasn't going to happen. "How the hell do you see a proposal?" You chuckled as you looked back towards the corner, the sadness on the nervous woman's face as she looked down at her empty plate was unmistakable. "She's breaking up with her for the barista."

"Don't be ridiculous." She waved you off, shaking her head as she turned to look at you. "You're off your game today, Y/N."

Well, that could be due to the closeness of the gorgeous woman sitting next to you. Your brain was foggy, the only thing on your mind was whether or not you should suck it up and seal the deal. You were relieved when she looked away at the time your eyes flashed to her lips in a movement even you barely registered.

"Watch."

You looked towards the two women and sighed. You hoped Wanda was right, seeing the way the nervous woman looked at her partner sitting across from her. Last thing you wanted was for someone else to be caught in a twisted love triangle, between good and evil. And you hadn't realized you were holding your breath until the barista placed a muffin on the table with an engagement ring pushed into the top of it, releasing that breath that was held in your chest with relief.

"Told you." Wanda chuckled victoriously, and you were quite glad she was right.

Yet you weren’t going to admit that. “I thought we agreed, no mind reading,” you stated, looking at her. "There's no possible way you knew that."

Her laughter made you grin despite yourself, a wide smile coloring her face as she turned to face you. Her playfulness brought a light approach to what you thought would've been a dark situation, your eyes casting down to the tabletop to avoid her stare. "I saw the ring when we were ordering," she explained. "All I had to do was connect the pieces." You looked up, your eyes dancing around the room until you could find a new victim, but there was nobody else left to analyze. "You just can't accept a loss."

"Not to a cheater," you expressed teasingly, causing her to push against you.

"I didn't cheat."

"Did, too."

"Did not." She laughed. "You're a child."

"And you are a mind reading cheater," you countered, looking at her with a broad grin and a sparkle in your eye. 

"Am not."

"Are, too!"

"Am not, times a hundred!"

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest as you leaned back into the chair. "Real mature, Wanda," you said. The two of you sat in silence for a moment, staring at each other for what seemed like forever. You could feel yourself losing sense of your surroundings, she was the only one in the room at the moment. Nobody else mattered. You had to pull yourself out of that  "Are, too, times a thousand."

"Am not, times infinity." She cocked her eyebrow upwards in a challenge, a sly smirk resting on her lips.

"Infinity doesn't count," you laughed.

"Does, too," she countered.

"Does not!"

"Does, too!"

You looked away from her, towards the newly engaged couple in the corner, shaking your head with a small smile tugging your lips. "Since when?"

"Since the beginning of time!"

"Wanda, you're being absolutely" - you turned to look at her, finally noticing just how close the two of you had gotten in the past few minutes; and the final word in your sentence came out as a whispered breath - "ridiculous."

Her eyes flashed down to your lips, lingering for a solid two seconds before she looked back into your eyes, and you knew you didn't imagine it. You felt yourself leaning forward, her breath fanning across your face once again when she breathed out. Your heart was beating rapidly in your throat, your stomach leaping excitedly at the thought that, this time… she might kiss you back. Her warm, soft lips against yours was the only thing you craved right now. And when her hand rested on your elbow as you inched closer, you knew right then and there that she wanted this just as much as you did…

The vibrations shook the table, pulling both of you away from each other as your eyes flashed towards her phone on the other side, forgotten and disregarded until now. It demanded attention, Steve's name flashing on the screen this time as you rubbed your forehead in half frustration and half embarrassment. She was quick to reach over and reject the call again, looking at each other longingly, but you both knew the moment had passed. The window of opportunity to kiss your best friend has closed… for now.

When another opportunity would present itself more perfect than this? You wouldn't know.

"I should probably see what Steve wants," she expressed softly, standing up and moving her chair back to the other side of the table. You sighed quietly, rubbing the back of your neck. "Would you like a ride? I can take you home."

There was no doubt she was going back to the compound, and maybe it was a good idea to go back home and get some rest, especially after the accident, but you didn't necessarily feel like being alone at the moment. And there was always the possibility that Natasha and Bruce were also going to be with Steve, the two people you definitely didn't want to encounter at the moment. If not with Steve, they were most likely lingering around the compound either way. You could be a grown up tomorrow because, right now, you wanted to avoid them at all costs. And if you couldn't go back to the compound and didn't want to go home, your options of places to go were dwindling.

But you did have somewhere you could go. It was time to finish this suspension business, knowing exactly what was needed to get your hands on a mission.

"I'll get a cab," you told her, smiling at her softly. "I'm just going to sit here for a few more minutes." She didn't argue with you, nodding her head slowly as she sent you a smile before walking away. You sighed heavily as the door to the cafe shut behind her, leaning back into the chair as you buried your face into your hands. 

Life was just so unfair.

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You barely had your arm up all the way to knock on the door before it was pulled open, Pepper greeting you with a wide, tense, and clearly forced smile. The look on the older woman's face definitely screamed out psycho, the last thing someone sees before they get killed.

"I've been trying to reach you for hours," she expressed through her clenched smile. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion for a moment, but you didn't get a chance to pull your phone out of your pocket for confirmation before she pulled you into the house, closing the door behind her. You spun to look at her, watching as she crossed her arms over her chest tightly. Silence lingered between you and her, and you weren't sure if she wanted you to break the silence or if she was contemplating on what to say first. You chose to be patient.

"He's downstairs," she stated sternly. 

"Tha-"

"He's absolutely lost his mind, Y/N." She groaned in frustration as she threw her hands up in the air. You watched with wide eyes as she began to pace back and forth. "He's very determined to put a suit of armor around the world. He won't listen to reason, Y/N! He's spiraling down a path that just never ends."

You stayed quiet as she continued to rant, as if you had anything to say to reassure her anyway. The only person Tony ever listened to was Pepper, and if he wasn't listening to her, then there's no way he's going to change his mind. He wants to protect the world, to free himself of the burden of being Iron Man, Earth's best defender. You wondered how the hell he was still sane, but it seems now - according to Pepper - he was losing it.

"He'll listen to you, Y/N." You blinked yourself out of your daze, refocusing onto Pepper as you furrowed your eyebrows. If she had the ability to read minds, she'd know that what she had just said was completely wrong.

"What?"

"He's always favored you," she explained. "You're the closest to him out of the rest of the team and-" She sighed, shaking her head as she finally stopped pacing to face you, her arms crossed over her chest once more. 

"Pep-"

"He has a soft spot for you, Y/N. Will you just please… go down and talk to him?"

You huffed as you nodded at her wish, feeling uplifted by the relief that washed over her face as she quietly thanked you. You came here with the intention of talking to Tony, just not the topic she's asking of you. You don't really know how much of an impact your words would be if Pepper couldn’t get through to him, but you promised her you’d try.

You made your way down to the lab, sighing softly as you stepped through the door to watch Tony tirelessly work, his fingers flying across a keyboard hologram with ease, and you never fully understood how exactly he managed to do that so flawlessly. You would constantly find yourself having to look down at the keyboard, typing slower than a sloth at a DMV. You weren't as technologically advanced as Tony was, and you were okay with that.

You eyed the amount of beer cans and energy drinks lining the counter behind him, his hand shooting out to grip a cup to take a drink; you didn't know if it was filled with beer or energy drink.

"What're you doing, Tony?" He tensed up at your voice, but other than that, he didn't really have much of a reaction to your presence. You walked further into the room, arms crossed over your chest. You sighed as you neared him, taking a peek into his cup and you still couldn't decide if it were alcohol or an energy drink. 

Pepper had a right to be worried.

"What's the plan?" You stepped up next to him as his typing froze, his eyes glued to a hologram of the earth as you picked up his cup. You brought it to your nose and took a breath, immediately coughing at the strong smell of alcohol. You quickly placed the cup back down.

"Put a suit of armor around the world."

You sighed as you looked closely at the man, heavy bags under his eyes, the stench of alcohol radiating off of him. You wondered where Tony has been the past couple of days. Looks like this was the answer to that question. "Sounds like a cold world, Tony."

He looked at you, his pupils dilated in what you couldn't determine as anger or if he was just drunk. "I've seen colder."

You pursed your lips together for a moment, turning to look at the blue sphere in front of you, staring at it as it slowly rotated. "And you're trying to build a fire." You looked back at him to catch him nodding. "Fires can get out of control, Tony," you continued softly. "You're going to light this fire that we may not be able to put out, and then what?"

He huffed, turning away from you and reaching over to pick up a wrench to clench it tightly in his fist. "This is the only way to protect everybody."

"Don't start a fire you can't quench."

He looked down at the wrench in his hand, slapping it against his palm for a brief moment before he suddenly turned and threw it across the room. The wrench flew through the holographic globe and smashed into the far wall, causing you to flinch at the sudden outburst. You watched in silence as he grabbed another tool, throwing it as well.

"Come on, Y/N," he ordered, picking up a hammer and handing it out to you. You furrowed your eyebrows, looking at the tool for a brief moment before your eyes flickered up to Tony. "I know what happened between you and Romanoff. I know you have some pent up anger in there." He shook the hammer at you, your head tilting down to look at it again.

Your stomach twisted with unease as you gripped the handle of the hammer in your fist, taking it out of Tony's hand. He gestured towards the wall where the other tools he had thrown rested on the floor below it. You looked at him, unsure, but when he nodded you turned to face the wall and threw the hammer as hard as you could.

You felt all your trouble lift off your shoulders the moment the hammer smashed into the wall, the satisfying noise it made as it clattered to the ground. A laugh bubbled out of your chest as you looked at Tony, but he was only shaking his head.

"We could do more." He brought two tools into each hand, absentmindedly handing you one as he faced the collage of monitors. You saw where this was going, his arm going back in preparation to throw the tool, and you said nothing as you watched it soar through the air and crash into one of the expensive-looking TV. 

A spiderweb crack exploded on the screen, the man letting out a holler of a laugh, and you were quick to follow his lead. Your aim was true, the tool that Tony had handed you crashing into the monitor next to the newly-broken one and the sound of the screen shattering was much more satisfying than the hammer smashing into the wall. You met his extended hand in a high five, laughter erupting from your chest before you both grabbed another tool off the workbench.

You sat with Tony against the wall some time later, surrounded by destroyed equipment and the sound of electricity. A can of energy drink rested against your leg as you had a loose grip around it, and you automatically passed the drink to Tony when he held his hand out for it. You sucked in a deep breath as he took a swift drink, looking out into the room with a small smile on your face. As destructive as this was, you felt some of the tension from the last few days seep off of you whenever you broke something. And you were glad Tony gave you the opportunity to let out some of that anger you were bottling up, just knowing you were going to explode at the wrong person eventually. And though you knew you were going to regret breaking this stuff that most likely costs more than your paycheck, you were going to relish in this moment.

You deserve it.

"Here." Your head slowly swiveled towards Tony, accepting the can he was handing towards you. He cleared his throat as you finished off the rest of the drink, crushing the can in between your hands before throwing it towards the center of the destruction. 

"Remember when I did you a favor and took that spot on a mission for you? I need to cash in that favor you owe me, Tony." You leaned your head against the wall, watching sparks fly off of an exposed cable dangling from the air. You figured you should put that out there first, not give him a reason to deny your request. "I need you to go over Steve's head and put me on a mission."

"Done." You turned your head to look at him, eyebrows raised in surprise. 

You picked your head up from the wall, a smile tugging your lips. "You're joking."

"I got one for tomorrow. All yours if you want it."

"Really?"

He sighed as he nodded. "If you ask me, I think Rogers suspending you is quite foolish."

You laughed softly. "Of course you would, Tony."

"You're a great agent, Y/N," he said. "One of the best. It's a waste putting you on the sidelines. Plus, it's two for one. You're cashing in the favor and I get to go over Cap's head at the same time."

You hummed thoughtfully for a moment, remembering the last time you blindly accepted a mission from Tony, it didn't end well. "What's the mission?"

He huffed. "It would be you and two other agents going undercover to stop an arms deal. It's not a big one, but it's not a small one either."

"Who are the agents?"

"Not anyone on the team," he assured you. "Lower levels. Sanders and Moffitt."

You furrowed your eyebrows. Sanders. The name sounded very familiar to you, but you were still high on the adrenaline of destroying Tony's lab that you couldn't think properly. You agreed to the mission, finding it a relief that nobody from the team was on it. You'd finally be able to breathe without them trying to help you or trying to make amends.

It was exhausting.

You decided to change the subject. "When's the wedding?" You reached out to grab another can of energy drink, cracking it open and taking a large sip of it.

"I don't know," he hummed, accepting the can from you. "I'm letting Pepper handle all of it." He tilted his head back, taking as much of the liquid as his mouth could hold before he placed the can back into your extended hand.

"I don't think she's getting much done with her constant worrying about you," you said. "At this rate, the wedding would probably be in 2023." He sighed softly as you took another sip of the energy drink, pulling the can away from your face to read the label. "What cheap ass convenient store did you get these from? This stuff doesn't even work."

"You're going through a lot, too," he expressed quietly. You pretended to be intently focused on the ingredients in the energy drink, though it brought little interest to you as Tony continued speaking, "You never did get that ring, did you?"

You couldn't tell if it was his words or if the multiple energy drinks were finally kicking in, but the beat your heart skipped was unmistakable. It even caused some pain, your breath hitching in your throat. You almost forgot Tony was the only one you told about the idea to propose before this whole situation happened. He was the one who was giving you the unholy amount of missions to begin with, he got curious and started pestering you.

"Sometimes…" You huffed, shaking your head as you played with the tab on the top of the can. "Sometimes I wonder why." You looked up, towards the destruction the lab was in, as you breathed out a shaky breath. "I mean… she told me why she did it, but… it just doesn't sit well with me. It doesn't fully explain it." You shook your head, leaning it back against the wall. "The first time it happened, she said they were drunk. I guess that's reasonable, but the other two times? I don't know. I think I'm just-"

"Drunk?" You looked at him, meeting his eyes as he furrowed his eyebrows in thought. "Banner can't get drunk. His metabolism cooks right through the alcohol. I tried to get him drunk so many times."

His words didn't process quickly at first, slowly picking your head up as you raced his words in your mind. Banner can't get drunk. The thought made your stomach twist in rage, your teeth grinding together as your heart hammered against your ribcage. Tony could see the anger written on your face with your flared nostrils and narrowed eyes, and he watched as you crushed the can in your angered daze. You didn’t seem to care about the drink spilling all over your clenched fist, your eyes fixated on the space in front of you. He didn’t realize what he had said until you climbed to your feet, and he was scrambling after you as the crushed can fell from your hand.

“Wait, Y/N-”

Your sudden stopping caused Tony to bump into you, lurching you forward a step as he followed your stare to see Pepper standing in the doorway. Tony sent the woman a wide, sheepish grin, your jaw glued shut to be able to break out into a smile. Not that it mattered either way, neither of you could get her attention as her eyes worked to marvel at the destruction of the room behind you. Her eyes were blown wide, her mouth parted open just partly as her mind raced to take in the newly decorated lab. She was pissed. 

"What did you do?" She was staring right at Tony when she asked it. In her eyes, you were innocent. And you were going to take advantage of that moment, moving to leave the room. Tony called out for you, catching your wrist, but you easily slipped out of his grip.

You didn't glance behind you as you left, knowing you were probably going to receive half of what Pepper was giving Tony tomorrow when you get back to work. For now, you had something you needed to do.

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You barely acknowledged how much money you threw at the cabbie, climbing out of the car without another wasted second. Your walk through the compound was filled with purpose, marching through the halls as you searched the building. All you were seeing right now was red, your vision tunneled as you rounded the corner to see him through the window of the conference room. You didn’t care for anything else, throwing the door open without hesitation to earn every single person’s attention. And though you didn’t process who was in the room - the only person in your line of sight was Bruce, after all - someone did sense the anger radiating off of you, an arm swooping around your waist and pulling you back just as Bruce scrambled to his feet. You didn’t bother fighting against whoever was holding you back, their arm was strong around you, but that didn’t prevent you from staring daggers at the scientist.

“What the hell are you doing, Y/N?” Steve’s angry voice was in your ear, confirming that he was the one who interrupted your war path.

“Let me go,” you declared, throwing his arm off of you. Bruce had moved to the other side of the table, and with Steve directly next to you, you weren’t going to be able to do what you want to do to him. “I should kill you.” You’ve never felt so… angry before. The anger ran through your veins, your blood boiling to the highest degree the longer you stared at him. Tony’s words just kept echoing in your head. Bruce can’t get drunk.

“What is going on?” You heard Natasha’s voice, but you couldn’t make yourself tear your eyes away from Bruce to look at her.

“Bruce can’t get drunk.” It was four words that twisted your stomach, four syllables that made you wish that that bullet killed him. You finally turned to look at her, noticing that Wanda was in the room as well. It seemed as if the whole gang was here. Only person you were missing was Vision and it would be the most awkward situation ever. “You got drunk and he tricked you so he could get into bed with you.” You looked back at Bruce, trying to think of a way to get around the table without giving Steve the chance to stop you from kicking the scientist’s ass.

Though you already knew the Hulk would most likely kill you by the time you try to get a second shot in.

“Y/N-”

“You’re so lucky Rogers is here because you would be dead right about now, Banner,” you declared, laughing humorlessly. “The things I want to do to you? It’d make a seasoned serial killer jealous.”

“Y/N.” You looked towards Natasha, watching as she took a couple of steps towards you, and you furrowed your eyebrows when you noticed that she wasn’t nearly as mad as she should be. No, you were holding much more anger than she was and she’s the victim.

“What?” you snapped. “Why aren’t you doing anything, Nat? He… He took advantage of you! If this were any other man, he would’ve been dead already!”

The softness in her eyes, the sadness on her face… It was telling you the truth, the truth you wanted to ignore for as long as you could, but you could feel the anger slowly evaporating inside of you. Your mind was racing as your eyes flickered to Wanda behind her, her expression unreadable as she tilted her head to the side slightly. You could feel your heart building up speed as you let yourself accept the truth, everybody’s eyes on you as your heavy breathing steadied.

You felt your shoulders slump in defeat, unable to maintain eye contact with Natasha as you said, “You weren’t drunk.”

She sighed, glancing at Bruce for a brief moment before looking back at you. “No, Y/N. We… We weren’t drunk.”

“You lied to me.” You took a step away from the table, shaking your head. “Why? What would be the point in that?”

“Because the real reason wasn’t going to-”

“What’s the real reason?” You made eye contact with her this time, the anger that had left your body was slowly making a comeback against the sadness that was flooding through your blood. “I don’t want anymore lies. If you don’t tell me the truth, she will.” You gestured towards Wanda, her eyes still on you. You knew she read Natasha’s mind the second she realized what was going on, she now knows the truth that was being hidden from you. “Why did you cheat on me?”

“Y/N-” You pushed Steve away from you when you felt him step towards you, and he sighed heavily. “You don’t want to do this right now.”

“No, I think I do,” you sneered, ignoring the patriot when he rolled his eyes. “Tell me.”

“I thought I didn’t love you anymore.”

How many more hits were you willing to take before you completely snapped? Just one, it seems. One fatal blow to your shattered heart was just enough for it to crumble to pieces, and you were pretty sure you heard the moment it happened, too.

You didn’t know how to process the confession, seemingly frozen in place as her words traveled through the air. She thought she didn’t love you anymore. She didn’t love you anymore. She didn’t love you. It was the only thing you were getting out of it, the fact that she had not only lied to you multiple times, but also questioned her love for you. You were sure you would’ve fell over if Steve wasn’t behind you, his hands going onto your shoulders as he steadied your dizzy figure. You didn’t know what you wanted to do. Scream? Cry? Punch something? All of the above? Your mind was incoherent as your body flooded with all of the emotions at once.

You did the only thing that seemed appropriate to you at that moment… You walked away. You shrugged Steve’s hands off of your shoulders and left the room without another word, ignoring Natasha calling out for, ignoring Steve’s pitiful stares and Bruce’s sad eyes. And you could feel the pressure building up in your chest, rising in your throat and burning your eyes. The urge to cry was quickly overcoming all of the other things you could’ve done, but you couldn’t do that. Not yet.

“Y/N.” You flinched when you felt a hand land on your shoulder, turning around to come face to face with Wanda.

“Wanda, I… I can’t-” Your voice caught in your throat, your face became red and puffy as you continued your inner battle with your sobs, and she gently caught your wrists when you tried to shove her away from you.

“Let’s go home,” she whispered, nodding as you sucked in a deep, shaky breath. “You need rest.”

With all of the energy drinks in your system, you knew sleep was the last thing you were going to get, but you let Wanda guide you out of the compound anyway. You let her lead you to her car and you let her drive you back to her house as you watched the sun slowly disappear in the horizon. The day was so close to ending, and it was a lot to process that all of that managed to happen within a span of twenty-four hours.

But the day wasn’t over just yet… 

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Vision cleared his throat, staring at the door in front of him as he shook out his shoulders. The android felt… nervous as he gripped the bouquet of flowers gently in his hand, glancing over his shoulder to look around the quiet neighborhood lit up by the streetlights briefly before looking towards the driveway to see her car. He sighed, knowing that her car being here meant nothing.

He went to see her as soon as he heard about the accident, but he was only greeted with an empty room. His next assumption was that she had gone home and decided to give her the day to rest, having only called her a few times throughout the day. She could be sleeping at this time of night, and his attempt at an apology would be falling on deaf ears, but it was a risk he was ready to take.

He knocked a heavy fist against the door, the sound echoing throughout the house. He waited a moment, giving her time to process that there was somebody at the door, as he looked down at the beautiful flowers the florist assured him that would make any lady forgive him. Though he doesn’t exactly know why he needs forgiveness, not knowing what he did to make her break up with him so suddenly. But he was willing to do anything to get her back, even if he had to apologize for reasons unknown.

After a second attempt at knocking, he rested his forehead against the door and sighed softly. “Wanda,” he called out, his shoulders slouching at the desperation to hear her voice. He didn’t know if he was speaking into a vacant building, but he made his voice loud enough for it to be heard no matter where she was in the house. “Wanda, I don’t know if you can hear me, I don't even know if you're sleeping, but I would like to talk if you can.” He picked his head up off of the door, sighing heavily. "Just five minutes."

His loud voice traveled through the house, reaching the bedroom where she was laying underneath the blankets. She could hear every word he was saying, begging for forgiveness for something he wasn’t at fault for, but she couldn’t bring herself to get out of the bed and go meet him. She didn’t have the heart to explain to him that he was never truly the one she wanted, that she never looked at him as anything more than a simple coworker, maybe even a friend if possible. How could she possibly explain that he deserves so much better than this. It’s not you, Vision, it’s me. The hackneyed phrase used throughout the world to defend most breakups…

But there was one difference in the phrase this time. It’s not you, Vision… 

She rolled over, draping her arm gently across your shoulders and you instinctively wrapped your hand around hers. You looked at her with a smile, a gesture that made her heart flutter with joy at finally being able to touch you, to hold you, to kiss you. And that’s exactly what she did, leaning forward to brush her lips across yours in a ghost kiss, the feeling of you sending shivers up her spine, and the laughter that escaped your throat made her stomach do somersaults. You moved your chin up, catching her lips in a kiss that neither of you hesitated to deepen, her hand escaping your grip to drag her nails along your jaw until her palm was resting against your cheek.

…it’s her.

Chapter 6

[wint3r-h3art]

Baby Step | College!Shangqi x Reader

@aliiiyyaaah asked: soooo what if the reader also has like a break up when she was around 18 and because she has attachment/trust/ abandonment issues she never dated again and shang chi tries to prove his love for her after someone tells him the reason as to why she is the way she is? idk or something like that anything is cool 😹

@moitiedemoncoeur​ asked: I was wondering if I could request something for Shang-Chi x Reader with kissing prompts? 1) almost kissing before turning away from each other & 2) slow and drawn out kisses where neither wants to let go. thank you! :)

Warning: None. A bit angsty at the beginning with a happy ending (very on brand of me) I’m using Shaun before this is before the even of Shang-Chi. 

Word counts: 1.2k

A/N: Both of your requests just seems fit, so please don’t mind me if i combine them. Sorry this takes so long. I didn’t know how to start or end this, so now it becomes an open-ended sort of drabble. I hope it’s ok. I’m sorry again for take so long going through requests. I hope this is what you’re looking for. No beta. Whatever mistakes are mine. If you enjoyed this, comment & reblog is greatly, greatly appreciate it.

“Tell me why you hate me,” Shaun looks at you as you try very hard to ignore him. The thing that you don’t get about Shaun is his persistence in getting an answer out of you. You haven’t really said no, yet you haven’t really said yes to him either. 

“I don’t hate you, Shaun,” you mumble as you close the textbook. You’re thankful that the library is quiet at this hour. 

“Then why are you ignoring me?”

You look at him before you’re looking down at your fingers. You noticed the flaking of the nail polish on your fingers from all the time you’re picking at them. You’re not sure about it yourself. A part of you is terrified of letting him in. 

Shaun has always been a sun to your cloudy days, but sometimes he shines so brightly that you’re terrified to get burned by him. You know he’s not like the other guys, but after being broken-hearted so many times, you’re becoming more guarded to let anyone in. Your last long-term relationship left you emotionally drained, and physically tired of simply being letting anyone that close again. Though it has been months, time doesn’t really heal the scars completely.

“I’m not ignoring you, Shaun. I-I just have a lot to do. My mid-term is coming up and I--”

“You know, I wish that you could just stop and tell me the truth for once,” he cuts you off. His expression suddenly changes to a serious one. You gulp, feeling like your heart is about to burst at that moment. 

Those soft, warm amber eyes burn into you, catching you right in the act. You hate lying to him, but no matter how many times you tried to run the scenarios in your head, you just can’t bring yourself to give into him. No matter how many nights you spent thinking about his smiles, his laughs, or the way his hands caresses yours whenever he handed you back your notes. Every touch feels electrifying, yet your stubbornness prevents you from just accepting the fact that perhaps someone as nice and as good-looking as him wants you.

“I am being truthful.”

“Bullshit.”

“Excuse me?” you’re clearly taken aback by this. 

“You’re such a liar.”

You open your mouth about to say something, but nothing comes out except an exasperated noise as you look at him stunned.

“You told me one thing and act like it never happened.”

You swallow hard at this. It’s true that you and he shared a kiss one night at a mutual friend’s house party. It was a nice kiss, you admit, but then you realized that deep, deep down you will never be able to reciprocate that same kindness and love he has shown you. It felt like you’re taking advantage of him alone.

“Please, don’t say that,” you manage to get the words out. You can feel your chest tightens at the thought of hurting him intentionally, but what can you do when you can’t seem to pull yourself together and allow him in fully.

“Then why are you keep lying to yourself about us?” 

You finally look up to meet this gaze. You didn’t realize then that you’re crying before he reaches out and wipe your cheek with his fingers. His callus fingers feel rough on your skin, yet it feels comforting in a way.

“I don’t know,” you say breathlessly before more tears spill down on their own. It feels like a floodgate of emotion just burst out of you the moment you admit to yourself that you do want him so damn much. 

“I-I’m just scared of letting anyone in, y’know. The last time I get my guard down, I was taken advantage of in every single way that I don’t think I can trust anyone again.” You don’t understand the words that came out of your mouth, but the more you talk, the more you feel so vulnerable. All of the armor and fortress you build up to protect yourself is slowly crumbling down.

Shaun sighs and brings your hand to his lips. The kiss feels almost featherlike the way his soft lips brush against your knuckle. You can feel your cheeks warmed at that. For a man his size, he has the softest touch, you thought.

“I know it’s not reassuring to you, and I’m sure you heard the bullshit words so many times before, but please believe me when I say this: I will never hurt you. I’ve never wanted to make anyone happy as I want to make you happy. You’re the sweetest, kindest, most beautiful, intelligent person I’ve ever met. Every time I’m with you, I feel like I can let go of all of the pretenses and just be myself around you.”

“Please don’t say that.”

“Say what?” he asks, his hand covering you before he gives you a slight squeeze. “The truth about how much I like you?”

“You’re just infatuated with me, Shaun,” you let out an uncomfortable chuckle amidst all the tears. 

“You don’t get to decide how I feel about you when you don’t even know how you feel about me yourself.”

“Shaun…” you utter softly as he leans in closer, pressing his forehead against yours. His eyes close as if he’s trying to savor your scent. His breath smells of caramel and coffee, sweet just like he is. You wouldn’t expect any less of him.

His lips slowly close in on yours, and you can feel yourself tremble in his arms. Your heart beats heavily against your chest the closer you are to him. His warmness radiates to you like a furnace in the mid of the autumnal wind. For a brief moment, it feels perfect. 

Yet, you turn away.

“I-I’m sorry.”

“No. No, don’t ever apologize. I shouldn’t,” he clears his throat. “I shouldn’t have force--”

“Stop right there,” you say firmly. This time it’s Shaun that’s staring at you. Shocked.

“You didn’t force me to do anything.”

“But I didn’t ask you or any--”

“And I didn’t say no either,” you cut him off. You look down on your hand as you begin to pick at your nails again. “I wanted it too...I’m just scared you know.”

“Then let’s take it slow. I’m willing to work for your trust, y’know?”

You look at him briefly, shocked to hear his offer. “What if it takes months?”

“Then it takes months.”

“Shaun, please be serious.”

“I am. I don’t mind waiting for you.”

“And this is why you shouldn’t. I feel like I’m taking advantage of you.”

“Well, it wouldn’t count as that when I am your willing victim,” he smirks, and you cannot help but sigh, trying to hide that small, shy smile from him. Only Shaun is able to make you smile admit crying.

“Small step,” you reiterate and you can see his expression change into a warm bright smile once more. He reminds you too much of a Gold Retriever.

“Baby step,” he repeats before placing a chaste kiss on your lips.

You and him look at each other briefly before you are the one who leans into hims this time. Your arms wrap around his neck. His tongues glides against yours. Time seems to stop at the moment. It feels as if the world has dissolves around both of you. It feel exhilarating to be wanted and needed by someone like him. You don’t it then, but when Shaun pulls away, you both are breathless and panting. Shaun’s face is flushed. His lips is a bit swollen and red. Your arms are still around his neck, and he wouldn’t want them in any other way, except for when you see people starts pouring into the library. Your private moment shared between Shauns soon cut short.

“Baby step,” you mumble softly to yourself as you withdraw away from him.

“Baby step,” he echoes, smiling at you as he helps you gather your text books.

[buriedlove]

Hi. Just a little curious: how many (approximately) partners (like you know... THAT type of partners😅) did BL's had before?? And relationships? If it's not too spoilery ofc... 👀

Hey! Thank you for this ask. Here’s a little (spoiler free) summary of their relationship history. I’m not going to give their official ‘number’ because that may come up in the plot for some characters… but you can probably make a good guess. 

Rota - Rota has never had an emotional relationship - or at least, a reciprocal one. It’s just not part of the culture she lives in. That’s not to say she hasn’t had a sexual relationship. She has plenty of experience there, but it’s never been anything more than physical. That’s why an MC who truly wants to get to know her in every possible way will see a side of Rota never seen before…

Aayush - Oh Aayush. Our vamp boy has been around for a while, ya know? So his number is high. Like… high. In the past he’s been driven by lust not love. With one exception. The one true relationship he’s had in all of his years since becoming a vampire. Since that ended he hasn’t been with anyone else…until now. 

Alex - Alex has had 5 relationships…and not a single one night stand outside of those relationships. Dating isn’t easy with the pack watching your every move, plus Alex is a loyal boy and so emotional connection is important to him. His confidence in all things physical has been dented a bit by things he’s heard Ceri has said to other members of the pack, but as his relationship with MC deepens, his confidence will continue to grow. 

Eli - Eli doesn’t count - he’s too much of a free spirit for that, but he’s definitely enjoyed a number of sexual relationships, wherever he may be in the world. He wouldn’t call any of his relationships serious…although at times his partners might have hoped otherwise. Eli’s conflict between his lack of any kind of monogamous relationship against his desire to find ‘the one’ he’ll share the fairytale story with is a big part of the inner turmoil MC will see on his route. 

Abe - Abe has only had one long term relationship, and that ended in heartbreak for him. He’s had other partners since - but they’ve been purely physical. That might seem out of character for him, but physical relationships don’t scare him - it’s emotional connections and his partner really understanding who he is that terrifies him. I’m not going to go into detail (because…spoilers) but our quiet boy is uh… skilled… when it comes to the physical side of the relationship.  

Lily - Lily has had one happy relationship, and more unhappy ones than any person could count. Being single isn’t a status that Lily embraces, and so bouncing from one toxic relationship to the next has been her pattern. 

Catarina - Catarina has had three serious relationships and had her heart broken once by a cheat…and has been looking for the perfect ‘one’ ever since. She’s had a few friends with benefits relationships since but has kept her heart completely closed with them. Her search for the perfect 'one' brought her into the dome, but will she realise when she meets them?

Cerri - Cerri has had one partner in every sense of the word - Alex - and we all know how that turned out! She isn’t the most experienced in relationships, and scratch under that prickly surface and you’ll probably find a whole lot of insecurity about relationships…

Fleur - Fleur is experienced - she’s confident in herself and her body and has had a number of partners, although no one serious. Fleur came into BL looking for something more serious, but fully prepared to have lots of fun with whoever she felt like if that person wasn’t there. Then she met Zein, and the rest is history.

Zein - Zein has never been in a relationship of any kind. The life of a genie hasn’t allowed space for them to meet their own physical and emotional needs. Being with Fleur is Zein’s first experience and time will tell if the whole thing is too overwhelming for them.

[cappymightwrite]

What draws you to incest ?

*sighs* Ok, here we go. I'm a real card carrying Jonsa now aren't I?

Anon, listen. I know this is an anti question that gets bandied about a lot, aimed at provoking, etc, when we all know no Jonsa is out here being all you know what, it really is the incest, and the incest alone, that draws me in. I mean, come on now. Grow up.

If I was "drawn" to incest I'd be a fan of Cersei x Jaime, Lucrezia x Cesare, hell Oedipus x Jocasta etc... but I haven't displayed any interest in them now, have I? So, huh, it can't be that.

Frankly, it's a derivitive question that is really missing the mark. I'm not "drawn" to it, though yeah, it is an unavoidable element of Jonsa. The real question you should be asking though, is what draws GRRM to it? Because he obviously is drawn to it, specifically what is termed the "incest motif" in academic and literary scholarship. That is a far more worthwhile avenue of thinking and questioning, compared with asking me. Luckily for you though anon, I sort of anticipated getting this kind of question so had something in my drafts on standby...

You really don't have to look far, or that deeply, to be hit over the head by the connection between GRRM's literary influences and the incest motif. I mean, let's start with the big cheese himself, Tolkein:

Tolkein + Quenta Silmarillion

We know for definite that GRRM has been influenced by Tolkein, and in The Silmarillion you notably have a case of unintentional incest in Quenta Silmarillion, where Túrin Turambar, under the power of a curse, unwittingly murders his friend, as well as marries and impregnates his sister, Nienor Níniel, who herself had lost her memory due to an enchantment.

Mr Tolkein, "what draws you to incest?"

Old Norse + Völsunga saga

Tolkein, as a professor of Anglo-Saxon, was hugely influenced by Old English and Old Norse literature. The story of the ring Andvaranaut, told in Völsunga saga, is strongly thought to have been a key influence behind The Lord of the Rings. Also featured within this legendary saga is the relationship between the twins Signy and Sigmund — at one point in the saga, Signy tricks her brother into sleeping with her, which produces a son, Sinfjotli, of pure Völsung blood, raised with the singular purpose of enacting vengence.

Anonymous Norse saga writer, "what draws you to incest?"

Medieval Literature as a whole

A lot is made of how "true" to the storied past ASOIAF is, how reflective it is of medieval society (and earlier), its power structures, its ideals and martial values etc. ASOIAF, however, is not attempting historical accuracy, and should not be read as such. Yet it is clearly drawing from a version of the past, as depicted in medieval romances and pre-Christian mythology for instance, as well as dusty tomes on warfare strategy. As noted by Elizabeth Archibald in her article Incest in Medieval Literature and Society (1989):

Of course the Middle Ages inherited and retold a number of incest stories from the classical world. Through Statius they knew Oedipus, through Ovid they knew the stories of Canace, Byblis, Myrrha and Phaedra. All these stories end more or less tragically: the main characters either die or suffer metamorphosis. Medieval readers also knew the classical tradition of incest as a polemical accusation,* for instance the charges against Caligula and Nero. – p. 2

The word "polemic" is connected to controversy, to debate and dispute, therefore these classical texts were exploring the incest motif in order to create discussion on a controversial topic. In a way, your question of "what draws you to incest?" has a whiff of polemical accusation to it, but as I stated, you're missing the bigger question.

Moving back to the Middle Ages, however, it is interesting that we do see a trend of more incest stories appearing within new narratives between the 11th and 13th centuries, according to Archibald:

The texts I am thinking of include the legend of Judas, which makes him commit patricide and then incest before betraying Christ; the legend of Gregorius, product of sibling incest who marries his own mother, but after years of rigorous penance finally becomes a much respected pope; the legend of St Albanus, product of father-daughter incest, who marries his mother, does penance with both his parents but kills them when they relapse into sin, and after further penance dies a holy man; the exemplary stories about women who sleep with their sons, and bear children (whom they sometimes kill), but refuse to confess until the Virgin intervenes to save them; the legends of the incestuous begetting of Roland by Charlemagne and of Mordred by Arthur; and finally the Incestuous Father romances about calumniated wives, which resemble Chaucer's Man of Law's Tale except that the heroine's adventures begin when she runs away from home to escape her father's unwelcome advances. – p. 2

I mean... that last bit sounds eerily quite close to what we have going on with Petyr Baelish and Sansa Stark. But I digress. What I'm trying to say is that from a medieval and classical standpoint... GRRM is not unique in his exploration of the incest motif, far from it.

Sophocles, Ovid, Hartmann von Aue, Thomas Malory, etc., "what draws you to incest?"

Faulkner + The Sound and the Fury, and more!

Moving on to more modern influences though, when talking about the writing ethos at the heart of his work, GRRM has famously quoted William Faulker:

His mantra has always been William Faulkner’s comment in his Nobel prize acceptance speech, that only the “human heart in conflict with itself… is worth writing about”. [source]

I’ve never read any Faulker, so I did just a quick search on “Faulkner and incest” and I pulled up this article on JSTOR, called Faulkner and the Politics of Incest (1998). Apparently, Faulkner explores the incest motif in at least five novels, therefore it was enough of a distinctive theme in his work to warrant academic analysis. In this journal article, Karl F. Zender notes that:

[...] incest for Faulkner always remains tragic [...] – p. 746

Ah, we can see a bit of running theme here, can't we? But obviously, GRRM (one would hope) doesn’t just appreciate Faulkner’s writing for his extensive exploration of incest. This quote possibly sums up the potential artistic crossover between the two:

Beyond each level of achieved empathy in Faulkner's fiction stands a further level of exclusion and marginalization. – pp. 759–60

To me, the above parallels somewhat GRRM’s own interest in outcasts, in personal struggle (which incest also fits into):

I am attracted to bastards, cripples and broken things as is reflected in the book. Outcasts, second-class citizens for whatever reason. There’s more drama in characters like that, more to struggle with. [source]

Interestingly, however, this essay on Faulkner also connects his interest in the incest motif with the romantic poets, such as Percy Bysshe Shelley and Lord Byron:

As Peter Thorslev says in an important study of romantic representations of incest, " [p]arent-child incest is universally condemned in Romantic literature...; sibling incest, on the other hand, is invariably made sympathetic, is sometimes exonerated, and, in Byron's and Shelley's works, is definitely idealized.” – p. 741

Faulkner, "what draws you to incest?" ... I mean, that article gives some good explanations, actually.

Lord Byron, Manfred + The Bride of Abydos

Which brings us onto GRRM interest in the Romantics:

I was always intensely Romantic, even when I was too young to understand what that meant. But Romanticism has its dark side, as any Romantic soon discovers... which is where the melancholy comes in, I suppose. I don't know if this is a matter of artistic influences so much as it is of temperament. But there's always been something in a twilight that moves me, and a sunset speaks to me in a way that no sunrise ever has. [source]

I'm already in the process of writing a long meta about the influence of Lord Byron in ASOIAF, specifically examining this quote by GRRM:

The character I’m probably most like in real life is Samwell Tarly. Good old Sam. And the character I’d want to be? Well who wouldn’t want to be Jon Snow — the brooding, Byronic, romantic hero whom all the girls love. Theon [Greyjoy] is the one I’d fear becoming. Theon wants to be Jon Snow, but he can’t do it. He keeps making the wrong decisions. He keeps giving into his own selfish, worst impulses. [source]

Lord Byron, "what draws you to—", oh, um, right. Nevermind.

I'm not going to repeat myself here, but it's worth noting that there is a clear through line between GRRM and the Romantic writers, besides perhaps melancholic "temperament"... and it's incest.

But look, is choosing to explore the incest motif...well, a choice? Yeah, and an uncomfortable one at that, but it’s obvious that that is what GRRM is doing. I think it’s frankly a bit naive of some people to argue that GRRM would never do Jonsa because it’s pseudo-incest and therefore morally repugnant, no ifs, no buts. I’m sorry, as icky as it may be to our modern eyes, GRRM has set the president for it in his writing with the Targaryens and the Lannister twins.

The difference with them is that they knowingly commit incest, basing it in their own sense of exceptionalism, and there are/will be bad consequences — this arguably parallels the medieval narratives in which incest always ends badly, unless some kind of real penance is involved. For Jon and Sansa, however, the Jonsa argument is that they will choose not to commit incest, despite a confused attraction, and then will be rewarded in the narrative through the parentage reveal, a la Byron’s The Bride of Abydos. The Targaryens and Lannisters, in several ways excluding the incest (geez the amount of times I’ve written incest in this post), are foils for the Starks, and in particular, Jon and Sansa. Exploring the incest motif has been on the cards since the very beginning — just look at that infamous "original" outline — regardless of whether we personally consider that an interesting writing choice, or a morally inexcusable one.

Word of advice, or rather, warning... don't think you can catch me out with these kinds of questions. I have access to a university database, so if I feel like procrastinating my real academic work, I can and will pull out highly researched articles to school you, lmao.

But you know, thanks for the ask anyway, I guess.

[softcallofdutyimagines]

any safehouse crew x bell!reader headcanons? can be fluffy or angsty, whichever you prefer to write 🥺 i adore your work!

Aw, thank you!! Yeah, I'd love to share to some headcannons! These are sort of a mixed bag regarding fluff/angst, but I think they're mostly nicey-nicey :)

Sorry for your wait, but I hope you enjoy 💖

Adler

His relationship with you is such a tangled mess

He shouldn't even be doing this, not after all he's done to you and is still doing, but...

He just can't help but fall for you

Your memories of being with him during the war may be fake, but to you they're all too real

You know him better then anyone else, maybe even more then Sims

This whole thing started because you wanted to get to know him, to fill in the gaps and to continue growing the bond that only exists in your mind

Every day he struggles with the knowledge that what he's doing is wrong, along with the constant badgering about it from Hudson, Sims, and Park

But he's never felt this close, let alone wanted, by someone in his entire life

There'll come a day when the lid blows right off all this and explodes in his face for sure

Just... Not yet, he hopes

Hudson

If there's one person here who should not be getting involved with you... It's him

Adler and Park may be your handlers, but he's the one overseeing the entire operation

You wouldn't even be here if he hadn't passed down the orders from the higher ups

If there's nothing else you take away from this, he would have you know that there is much, much more at risk here then his mere job if he was found messing around with you

Hudson tried everything to resist you

You and your charming voice

You and your beguiling looks

You and your kindness and patient soul

His will was strong, but the flesh is oh so weak

No one has ever treated him like you do

Just an ounce of respect and a surprising, never ending stream of kindness...

What else is a lonely man to do?

Adler and Park know nothing, this is a term you both agreed on

And they never will, because as soon as your work here is done...

He will stop at nothing to keep you safe

Lazar

He knows, he knows...

He should be doing this

But damn it if you aren't just so... Loveable

Lazar has a big heart that just bursting at the seams with love to give

You'd think such a friendly fellow would be popular in the dating pools, but...

It would seem not so

He'll be honest, he was going to make moves towards Park...

Mostly because, between the two of you, she wasn't strictly off limits

But you were his first choice

And when Helen shut him down, well...

Why not at least try?

He never expected you to actually take to him

He deals with constant reprimands, but he dismisses them every time

No one knows what it's like to be so full of love and have no one to give it too

And now that he has you...

He'll be damned if anyone tries to take you away from him

Mason

Geez... All Mason wants is a stable relationship with someone who loves him and has the grit to see past his flaws

He's been taking his meds and seeing his psych, but the numbers and mind jacking still bother him

In fact, they very well might for the rest of his life

He feels so broken

So unlovable and far too damaged to even be an option for anyone else out there

So... Why are you so interested in him?

At first he brushes it off as a star struck kid, and maybe, at first it was, but then...

Things start to get serious

He meet up with you after work hours

You both get to talking and relating to one another through your memories of warfare and the current mission

You tell him you've seen plenty of things just as crazy as what's going on with him, and people that are twice that bad

He doesn't scare you, not one bit

Acceptance is all he's ever wanted, and to have found it in you feels better then anything he ever could've dreamed of

He falls for you so hard, he rarely let's you out of his sight and tries to get on as many of your missions as possible

Park

This whole op is a well oiled machine and she's the one driving it

Hudson and Adler may act like they're in charge, but they'd be nothing without her helping to hold them and you in line

She's a woman of rules, decorum, and conduct

There's a way to do things and a way not to, simple as that

And yet for all that, she still cannot understand how she's fallen in with you

She should be holding you at arms length at best, and yet here she is stealing kisses and playing with your hair when no one is looking

Maybe she's too much of a sucker for a good forbidden romance story

Or maybe there's always been something in you that's spoken to her from the beginning

A certain way you carry and conduct yourself

So brave and strong...

The kind of person she aspires to be, deep down...

Soon she starts saying things like "what's the worst that could happen" and "no one has to know"

And before long, she knows she could never let you go

When this mission is over, she swears to set you free from the mental prison and living hell she helped put you in, no matter the outcome for your relationship

She loves you too much to see you suffer

Sims

He has the exact same problem as Adler

You know him too damn well

Except... You don't really know him at all, huh?

It takes him so long to wrap his mind around that one...

But the more and more you keep coming to him, asking about things like 'Nam and his time in the war...

The more and more that line becomes muddled

How much have you been programmed to know, and how much did you learn naturally, just from getting to know him?

It's hard being a Vietnam vet you know...

Everyone blames you for the loss of the war, and no one wants much to do with a soldier in general, he guesses

Too much of a headache when you could just get a nice, normal person, right?

But old Vietnam vets get lonely too you know...

So you know what? Who gives a damn

This whole thing with you and mk ultra was screwed from the start, and who knows where the end will take you

If nothing else, if not even for his own benefit, he may as well give you the respect enough to enjoy a little fling

He treats it seriously. Very seriously.

He even grows to truly love you

Maybe that's why he's so scared for you

Woods

Here's a man who'd go his whole life proclaiming he'll never settle down and had no interest in doing so

He's a lone wolf, a life long solider, and far too fucked up for a stable relationship anyhow

At least... That's what he'll say

The truth is he yearns for what Mason and Hudson have

A happy little family and cozy home to protect and care for

He wants to feel needed, wanted even

And he'll never get that from long hours at the practice range and lonely weekend nights spent in his living room

He takes the same approach as Mason would at first

He brushes you off as a starry eyed fan and nothing more

But you know... He's never had anyone care enough to be a "fan" before

Alex laughs at him and keeps saying he's letting his ego get to his head, but what the fuck does he know?

He's got all that shit with the numbers and reznov stuck in his head, and yet he still has someone to go home to each night

So he does it, he gets involved with you

And it's the best damn feeling in the whole world

He loves you relentlessly and soon finds he can't bear to be away from you for too long

Mason will never let him life it down, but you know what?

He's just fine with that

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

I’m sorry, but can I just go on a little rant about the Louis, clouis, and the Clem comic...? 

I didn’t really talk about Louis in my overall review of the comic because I wanted that to be more contained to the content shown on the pages, Clementine’s relationship with AJ, and her as a character.... but the more I think about these comics and Louis, the more frustrated I become thinking about what Clementine abandoning everyone would do to him. 

[... okay it’s not little anymore since I guess I can never just do anything simple when it comes to Louis, sorry my bad]

So, no surprise, we all know the comic’s bullshit by now. Clementine leaving everything and everyone behind because she’s not happy is dumb, AJ just letting her go is dumb, and Clem going to the mountains on crutches and a peg leg to find this so-called happiness is dumb. 

Now that we’ve established it’s dumb, I wanna talk about Louis because I got a lot of built up feelings about how bullshit this storyline is with how Clementine would not only abandon AJ, but also abandon Louis. 

Because let me tell you..... his heart would be broken beyond repair and I need to talk about why.

Sigh.... so.... muh boy. 

Before he met Clementine, Louis was this laidback, irresponsible, but caring and musical person who kept his head down to avoid conflict and never looked at the future. He was the kind of person who took things one day at a time, saw survival as a day-to-day task, and said that the future doesn’t exist, there’s only today. You get the point, he was never too concerned with things because they always seemed to work out, and if they didn’t, then that sucks and that’s why we should appreciate every day while we have it. 

Louis is shown to be charismatic and friendly, he spends his free time playing piano and card games, but no one really takes him seriously. Not even Marlon, his best friend for 8+ years. While he doesn’t seem to be on bad terms with anyone [including Aasim, they just act like people who disagree with the other’s point of view and have had the same argument many times, but that doesn’t mean they hate each other, y’know?] he also doesn’t appear super close with anyone outside of Marlon and possibly Violet, but even then. 

Marlon’s shown to have little faith in him with the way he talks about if Louis will even show up to hunt. He has a controlling grip on Louis that’s prominent during the confrontation scene when he uses intimidation to try to convince Louis to not interfere. Oh, and there’s the fact that Marlon’s been lying to Louis for the past year about the twins and then continued to lie to his face about what really happened to Brody... which isn’t great when you consider how Louis was the only one who had blind faith in him as a leader and, according to Marlon, was the only one who couldn’t see how pathetic he always was. 

Violet, while having a few more nicer moments with him than Marlon, still invalidates him and his feelings several times throughout the first half of the game which makes me wonder how close they ever were, or at least if Violet ever considered him a close friend to begin with. And no, a small monologue in the dorms doesn’t make everything better or confirm they were brotp the whole time... especially when once they’re on the boat, Louis might as well not exist because Violet can’t be bothered to acknowledge what happened to him or inquire about how he’s doing. I guess she just didn’t have time react while standing in her cell for several unbothered minutes-- no wait, it’s she already reacted off screen. Right. Good writing is good.

What I’m getting at here is that even though Louis is surrounded by people who he genuinely cares about, there is an argument to be made that he’s a lonely person. Hell, he’s aware of his loneliness when he says that no one hears past his music and jokes. I mean, how many nights do you think he spent by himself playing the piano because no one wanted to hear it? Are they like Violet and crack jokes about how he doesn’t have actual talent? Probably, given that someone literally carved “you suck at playing” onto the side of the damn piano. 

Oh, and let’s touch on that backstory of his. Louis grew up wealthy with two parents who loved him and each other, and they gave him anything he wanted except singing lessons. Louis says he wanted to be a real musician. But I guess his father didn’t like that idea and told him no, with the [as Louis puts it] dumb dad lesson of, “You get to be happy, or you get to be rich, can’t be both.” ...which is interesting given that Louis and his family were stupid rich but also.... were they not happy? well, that doesn’t make sense because little Louis knew that if he broke up their marriage, they would be hurt. 

So yeah, Louis was so upset that his father continually refused to let him take singing lessons that he broke into the man’s credit cards and faked an affair, which led to his parents divorcing... and then he spit his father’s words back in his face. 

Then they dumped him at Ericson. And the walkers came. 

There’s so much to unpack from the story he tells that it could be it’s own analysis, but basically.... Louis is aware of why what he did was fucked up, and he carries it with him every day. 

He regrets what he did, chews himself out for being such a “vindictive fuckhead” [and the amount of force used in that line tells you a lot, like how it’s not the first time he’s chastised himself like this] and he admits that he doesn’t even know the person he’s talking about. Yet, he still sees himself as bad, saying that they [I assume the staff] told him and the other kids they’re bad people. I don’t doubt that Louis internalized that which played a huge role in the confidence and self-esteem issues he has during tfs. 

Anyway, I’ll come back to this later, but when you take that amount of guilt and regret, and mix it with the fact that they dropped him off at this school that was supposed to make him better.... then the walkers came and those teachers, staff, and headmaster? Gone. Left a bunch of kids to fend for themselves, with the exception of Ms. Martin [but given how she looks when we find her I doubt she lasted that long] and I cannot imagine how horrifying that was for all of them. The dead are up eating people, and if you die you become one of them... and the people you thought you could rely on just fucking left you to die at this school. 

Every kid in that school has trauma and abandonment issues from before and after the world went to shit, every last one, and Louis isn’t the exception here. Over the years, a lot of kids died and they’ve all seen horrible shit. They all knew they were never going to see their families again, and as far as we know, no one came to get their kids at the beginning. They had to find ways of coping while trying to survive, and all they had left was each other. 

Louis copes with music and games and jokes. He’s built up this persona where it seems like he’s unaffected by the comments the others make, that the death and suffering he’s gone through is in the past, that he is confident and open to those around him.

But then Clementine and AJ show up, and Louis grows close with both of them. They had immediate chemistry upon first meeting, he was the one who looked after AJ since it seems like everyone else saw him as a little terror, and he went out of his way to be kind and make them comfortable. 

When they go hunting with him, Louis and Clementine have a moment after taking care of the walker where they lower their guards a bit-- Louis gives her more in-depth reasons for his views of survival, and going off her expression, it gets to her and makes her think.... but they’ve know each other a day and he’s not quick to infodump his life story or let her in, so he cuts the conversation short.

Then we have the Marlon confrontation scene that I have gone over so many times in the past. I won’t dillydally with it too long but..... Clementine appeals to Louis, who curls in on himself because of the control Marlon has on him. He wants to help, and hell, he knows this is wrong but he’s so used to not getting involved that he gets defensive.... plus, he’s known Clementine for two days, and he’s known Marlon for 8+ years.... he wants to believe Marlon but you can tell he doesn’t want this, either. It takes Clementine talking to him to give him courage to stand between her and Marlon’s gun and it’s a lot.

AJ shoots Marlon and everything goes to shit, and Louis is a goddamn mess. His best friend was murderer right in front of him, so add that to the trauma list, and he’s overwhelmed with all these feelings that again.... they keep getting invalidated by Violet because “Marlon was a liar and murderer, therefore you shouldn’t feel bad about his death. Get over yourself, Louis, you can be such a shithead sometimes.” 

Oh yeah Vi, I guess he should care more about two people he’s known for a total of two days rather than for the safety of the people [including you] he’s grown up with and cared about for 8+ years.... makes sense. 

So yeah, little to no support during this time. Alone again. 

And just because I have to make this clear so no one gets a hair up their ass-- both Louis and Violet are wrong here. Kicking them out isn’t the solution, but neither is acting like AJ was right to commit murder just because it was Marlon.

 But plots gotta plot, so they get voted out and you can see that Louis is conflicted about the whole thing. He wants them gone, but at the same time, he knows what kicking them out means. You can see it on his face that he’s not okay with kicking them out. He’s hurting when he’s there in the dorms telling them how the vote went... he literally doesn’t know what else to do. He just knows that everything hurts, Clem and AJ caused it, and he wants the pain to stop. He even tries to justify it to himself by figuring that they’ve done this before so they’ll be fine. Not a great thing to say, Lou. 

Anyway, we know the story, Clem and AJ come back and Louis once again sees the consequences of acting out of pain.... AJ is shot because Louis was hurt and he made a bad decision that he’s gotta live with.... something that he’s done before, and this affirms to him that he’s bad. He wishes he could take it back, and goes as far as to admit that to Clementine during the archery scene. 

By the way, credit to him for his apology to her. It’s rare in these games that Clem gets a genuine apology from someone who hurt her and doesn’t turn around to repeat the hurtful behavior, y’know? Plus, I can think of plenty of characters who owed Clem an apology in the past or if they did apologize, it was half-assed. 

You can feel how conflicted he is with this whole thing-- learning who Marlon really was and what he did, feeling something for Clementine before everything went down and not knowing how to handle those feelings afterward, caring about AJ and understanding why he thought shooting was the best choice but still hurting that his friend is dead.... 

And the thing is.... Louis forgives her for so much, as she does him, and through all of that bullshit, they manage to develop that strong connection that turns romantic. Louis lets himself be fully vulnerable with her and is honest about his feelings, how she listened when no one else did and seeing him for more than just the persona he put on. 

This works on Clementine’s side, too. Clementine has been through her own fair share of bullshit-- trauma, abandonment, loss, injury, you name it. She’s made mistakes, done terrible things, and has been in enough groups to know that romance usually ends in heartbreak.... and yet, she’s willing to open herself up to Louis and admit she feels a lot for him. 

Is it a little rushed? Yep. Could it have been handled better? Of course, most things this season could’ve, but what we got was pretty good. 

So Clementine and Louis are romantically involved now, the raiders attack, and she saves him... and boy does Louis feel guilty about that one, too. He feels bad enough that he questions why she would pick him because he can’t fathom his life being worth saving over another’s. He doesn’t see himself as useful, and even though Clementine is literally his girlfriend at this point, his self-esteem is so all over the place that he can’t understand why she would have him at her side. 

And when Clementine tells him that he’s too important to her, he’s too baffled to even give a response. He looks at her in disbelief like he wasn’t expecting her to say that.  But this shows that at the beginning of their relationship, he still doubts himself, and through her working with him, he begins to build up that strength in himself. 

He becomes brave enough to share what got him sent to the school with her, and he plays Don’t Be Afraid for everyone at the party and like.... for once, everyone is listening to him. Really listening to him. They’re not talking shit about his musical skills, they’re not ignoring him or the feelings he’s putting into the song, they’re sitting there with him and I just..... if you watch him, you can see that his eyes get pretty glossy throughout the song. The moment meant something to everyone. 

There’s also the fact that Clementine asked him to come with her and AJ onto the boat, and to be the one in charge of the bomb... that’s a huge responsibly and he feels the pressure of that. He starts to panic a bit about if he can do it, because what if he fucks up? What if he gets them caught and makes everything worse? What if something happens to Clementine and he can’t do anything about it? 

She’s there to reassure him that she believes in him, and that he can do this. They’re going to get everyone back, and he needs to focus... then he asks her to slap him which why would you? that’s dumb, so Clementine smooches him instead and like.... he physically relaxes into her because he’s comfortable and trusts her in this situation. 

Also, he loves her and cares about this mission enough to cover himself and his fancy jacket in walker guts.... sure, he complains while doing so but how else is he gonna cope with rubbing rotten guts on himself to blend in with a herd of walkers? 

Skipping ahead so that we’re not here all day, I wanna talk about the walk back to the school because it’s one of the most important clouis moments in the game and a huge reason that solidifies why the comic is bullshit.

Louis went off on his own to go out and find them. He didn’t know where they would be, he just knew that he had to go out and find them after making sure everyone was okay back at the school because he couldn’t bare the thought that he had lost them. And the way the AJ gets so excited to see him? and the group hug??

At this point, Louis has grown so much as a character. With Clementine by his side to support him, he’s grown stronger and more reliable. Remember how he never thought about the future? Well, now he is because his relationship with Clementine has given him a reason to long for a future. He talks about building this imaginary house with her, one he knows they can’t physically build... but it’s his way of saying we can build a home together, that he wants a future with her and AJ and everyone else. It’s such a personal conversation that flows so easy between them. Louis is more comfortable talking to her about things from his past, which is something he didn’t want to do back in ep1. 

He confides in her how he’s feeling after he shot and killed Dorian, he tells her that having a home means protecting it and I just.... it’s so good, okay? And from Clementine’s side, you can feel how at ease she is with him, too. Just the way she smiles at him as they’re walking? like he’s the cutest thing and she’s so happy to have him with her? 

But then we gotta deal with Minerva’s crazy ass on the bridge and well, AJ shoots Tenn and Louis is having flashbacks to Marlon and it’s not great. That’s a whole thing, and he ends up separated from them while escaping.

We don’t get to see Louis’ reaction to Clementine getting bit and losing her leg since I guess that puts a damper on the overly happy ending. But, going off of what we know about him and what I’ve explained [which isn’t even all of it, this isn’t a full Louis character analysis. if it was, it would be much longer and in multiple parts... believe it or not, I’m trying to not make this too long and only sorta failing...] we can get an idea of how he would react. 

Um, to say he was upset is an understatement.

Because remember, he had no time to think and climbed over the fence, thinking he could get them to climb over and they could get away, but it didn’t work. He ended up leaving them in order to save himself since walkers were closing in on him.

But you know that he’d blame himself for the bite. A lot of, “if I had just stayed” and “I should’ve climbed back over, I should’ve stayed with you.” I’m sure there were points where it looked like Clem wouldn’t make it and I can’t imagine how much hurt he went through watching her suffer and heal from losing a leg like that. 

Not only that, but knowing that AJ was the one to do it? And him thinking about what Clem’s death would do to AJ after all this? There isn’t a doubt in my mind that Louis would take care of AJ if she died. He cares about AJ, and he loves Clementine, so he be there for both of them, even if he’s still hurting from Tenn’s death. 

However, Clementine didn’t die. She survived the bite and amputation, and when we flashforward, she and Louis are still happily together. Louis is right there next to her at dinner, and he’s the one to help her with her crutches. He’s there to go over future plans to meet the traveling caravan, and Clementine wants him to be the one to go. 

Oh, and Louis once again forgives AJ for shooting Tenn, claiming that he understands that AJ saw something that he couldn’t. Like with Marlon, he’s not happy Tenn’s dead but he can see why AJ did it to save his life. 

I just..... happy ending. Clementine and Louis are together and she’s truly happy to have found a home for her and AJ with him at Ericson. 

....But then the comic thought it would be fun to say “nah.” 

The comic isn’t canon, I’m still insulted that it would ever consider itself as such, but even so I can’t help but feel so frustrated about how this would destroy Louis. 

He finally found someone he would consider his best friend, not just his girlfriend. She saw past that funny man persona and he trusted her enough to let her past this wall he built around himself. He let himself become vulnerable around her, he named his song after her. Their initials are carved into his piano with a heart surrounding them. He loved her. 

Clementine left him feeling loved, something he probably hasn’t truly felt since he was a little boy with his parents before their divorce. She loved him even after hearing his past because she knew that wasn’t him anymore, and she helped him build the confidence he needed to step up. Because of Clementine, Louis wants to enjoy every day while also looking at the future. He isn’t lonely anymore, he has her and AJ. He’s truly happy.

So to tell me that Louis would wake up one morning only to have AJ tell him that Clementine’s gone, she’ been planning an escape without telling anyone because she wasn’t happy...? I’m sorry, but if you think that wouldn’t leave Louis absolutely devastated, then you know nothing about him as a character. 

This idea is just.... look, Louis is perceptive. That’s a big part of his character, he’s perceptive of those around him. If Clementine was showing signs of being unhappy or depression, he would see it. He would notice a change. He would be able to tell if something was off, and he would ask her about it. Louis is the type of person to ask you what you need. What can he do to help? What do you need to feel better? And if you don’t know, it’s okay, he’ll help you figure it out in any way possible. 

Plus, the comic suggests that there are times where she went off on her own but came back [probably doing her escape prep ugh] and you expect me to believe that Louis wouldn’t notice that or wonder what she’s doing? Wouldn’t sense that something’s going on? 

After she’s gone, he’s going to blame himself for not being enough. He couldn’t make her happy and he was a fool to think he ever could. AJ lost the only family he’s known since he was born because Louis couldn’t help her, couldn’t do anything to stop her from leaving. 

And for him to realize that she didn’t love him? Clementine, the girl he thought the world of because of how strong and confident and in-charge she was, because she saw him for who he was..... she left him, abandoned him... and she couldn’t even be bothered with a goodbye.... that says that she didn’t care all that much about him in the end.

You KNOW that he would think he had this coming, too. How could the universe allow him to fall in love and be happy with someone who loved him back after what he did to his parents? He would feel so heartbroken that he would see this as some sort of karma for breaking up his parents happy marriage as a kid years before he ever met Clementine and before the apocalypse.

I fucking can’t.... I don’t have the words to fully explain how much I hate this. Louis wouldn’t be okay afterward, and I doubt he’d ever fully recover. I wasn’t joking when I mentioned before that Louis would stop playing piano. How could he sit there and play when I he can see is their initials and remember the night she confessed to him? When he named his song after her? Clementine left and took the music with her because Louis wouldn’t have it in him... something that he used to cope would be ruined and that’s just.... it’s fucking awful. 

Not only that, but now he has AJ who I assume is hurting just as much [though the comics inaccurately assume he would just let Clem go sooo... yeah] and he would be the only one Louis would really talk to about it, but then again.... what if AJ doesn’t wanna talk about it? What if AJ starts to act out and things just become terrible and Louis is just too overwhelmed? 

I just.... UGH. That’s how I feel. UGH. 

Clementine from the comic? Not her. She would never fucking do this to Louis, AJ, or anyone else at Ericson, and you would know that if you played the tfs. 

Sigh.... sorry, I just needed to get this all out. I haven’t seen anyone talk about how Clem leaving would affect Louis and I’ve gotten some asks/come across some posts about Louis that have left me incredibly annoyed.... well, I was annoyed before because of the comics, so my annoyances with those things were only heightened. So yeah... I wanted to talk about Louis’ character in hopes of explaining why he would be so hurt if this comic was canon. 

Which it’s not. So it’s fine. 

How are we all feelin’ at this point, by the way? I know I’m not the only one still annoyed with the comic, so I hope y’all are doin’ okay. Hope you’re stayin’ chill and thinking about your faves to help cope with this mess hahaha