#don't fuck the company
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Das Leben braucht mehr Schokoguss 15 - Nachtschicht
Also. Mia und Fabian, ganz allein in der Firma, fangen an, Schokoladentafeln zu machen und albern dabei ein bisschen herum.
„Wie weit bist du?“, fragt Fabian irgendwann. […] „Bei Nummer 43, und du?“ „Bei 54.“ „Du Angeber!“
Dann fragt er unvermutet, ob sie eigentlich noch mit „diesem Typen auf dem Foto“ zusammen sei.
Nein. Warum er das denn wissen wolle?
„Weil ich dich mag.“
Aw.
Weil Mia aber Mia ist, kriegt sie nicht heraus „ich dich auch“, sondern stammelt herum von wegen, sie möge ihn auch, so als Freund, also, sie wolle nicht wissen, ob er gut im…Schlittschuhlaufen sei!
Jesus fucking Christus. 🤦♀️
Sie labert noch ein bisschen weiter, erfindet eine Geschichte über Becky, die fürs erste Date immer mit den Männern Schlittschuhlaufen geht, so als Geschicklichkeits-Evaluation (cue Fabian: „Bist du denn interessiert an meiner Geschicklichkeit?“ 😏 also, so smooth, wie der Junge ist, sollte er beim Schlittschuhlaufen keine Probleme haben), fragt ihn dann nach seiner Lieblingsschokolade, erfindet Wörter.
„Sie sind jedenfalls ein kreativer Kopf, Fräulein Kammerer.“ Da ist er schon wieder. Dieser verwirrende Chef-Ton, der zugegebenermaßen auch ziemlich sexy ist.
Uähhh. Mia, ich weiß, du bist nur Praktikantin, aber: don’t fuck the company.
Das Geplänkel geht weiter und ihnen kommt beim Lästern über ihre Exen (Isabella und Johnny) die Idee für eine neue Sorte, die ��Böse Überraschung“ – Schokolade mit Pfeffer oder Chili in einer Verpackung, auf der steht „Danke für den schönen Abend/den Rückruf/…“.
Als sie fertig sind, haben sie noch mal einen Moment™, in dem Mia Fabian die Schokoladensprenkel vom Gesicht tupft. Aber sie bekommt kalte Füße und er erledigt den Rest* im Badezimmer, ehe er sie nach Hause fährt.
*...den mit der Schokolade im Gesicht!!! Nicht dass ihr denkt, hier.
#das leben braucht mehr schokoguss#props to anotherbleedingheart#es wird geflörtet#don't fuck the company#gsss (gute schokolade schlechte schokolade)
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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one of the things that's the most fucking frustrating for me about arguing with climate change deniers is the sheer fucking scope of how much it matters. sweating in my father's car, thinking about how it's the "hottest summer so far," every summer. and there's this deep, roiling rage that comes over me, every time.
the stakes are wrong, is the thing. that's part of what makes it not an actual debate: the other side isn't coming to the table with anything to fucking lose.
like okay. i am obviously pro gun control. but there is a basic human part of me that can understand and empathize with someone who says, "i'm worried that would lead to the law-abiding citizens being punished while criminals now essentially have a superpower." i don't agree, but i can tell the stakes for them are also very high.
but let's say the science is wrong and i'm wrong and the visible reality is wrong and every climate disaster refugee is wrong. let's say you're right, humans aren't causing it or it's not happening or whatever else. let's just say that, for fun.
so we spend hundreds of millions of dollars making the earth cleaner, and then it turns out we didn't need to do that. oops! we cleaned the earth. our children grow up with skies full of more butterflies and bees. lawns are taken over with rich local biodiversity. we don't cry over our electric bills anymore. and, if you're staunchly capitalist and i need to speak ROI with you - we've created so many jobs in developing sectors and we have exciting new investment opportunities.
i am reminded of kodak, and how they did not make "the switch" to digital photography; how within 20 years kodak was no longer a household brand. do we, as a nation, feel comfortable watching as the world makes "the switch" while we ride the laurels of oil? this boggles me. i have heard so much propaganda about how america cannot "fall behind" other countries, but in this crucial sector - the one that could actually influence our own monopolies - suddenly we turn the other cheek. but maybe you're right! maybe it will collapse like just another silicone valley dream. but isn't that the crux of capitalism? that some economies will peter out eventually?
but let's say you're right, and i'm wrong, and we stopped fracking for no good reason. that they re-seed quarries. that we tear down unused corporate-owned buildings or at least repurpose them for communities. that we make an effort, and that effort doesn't really help. what happens then? what are the stakes. what have we lost, and what have we gained?
sometimes we take our cars through a car wash and then later, it rains. "oh," we laugh to ourselves. we gripe about it over coffee with our coworkers. what a shame! but we are also aware: the car is cleaner. is that what you are worried about? that you'll make the effort but things will resolve naturally? that it will just be "a waste"?
and what i'm right. what if we're already seeing people lose their houses and their lives. what if it is happening everywhere, not just in coastal towns or equatorial countries you don't care about. what if i'm right and you're wrong but you're yelling and rich and powerful. so we ignore all of the bellwethers and all of the indicators and all of the sirens. what if we say - well, if it happens, it's fate.
nevermind. you wouldn't even wear a mask, anyway. i know what happens when you see disaster. you think the disaster will flinch if you just shout louder. that you can toss enough lives into the storm for the storm to recognize your sacrifice and balk. you argue because it feels good to stand up against "the liberals" even when the situation should not be political. you are busy crying for jesus with a bullhorn while i am trying to usher people into a shelter. you've already locked the doors, even on the church.
the stakes are skewed. you think this is some intellectual "debate" to win, some funny banter. you fuel up your huge unmuddied truck and say suck it to every citizen of that shitbird state california. serves them right for voting blue!
and the rest of us are terrified of the entire fucking environment collapsing.
#spilled ink#writeblr#i hope it is clear here that i actually very much care about equatorial countries#and that's part of what makes me so angry bc im like. climate refugees exist.#they've existed for a while!!!#and the reply is almost always ''should have thought about that before living on an island"#like fuck dude. do you need to like how people vote before ur like#your entire house shouldn't burn down each summer????#so many of these people make it their life to mock california that they think it's FUNNY#and im like. girl you should be fucking trembling. TEXAS??? ARE YOU LISTENING??#this is one of those times that like. i need to stress how fucking stupid it would be#to let trump win. bc he could have “reached across the aisle.” covid could have been#a MASSIVE commercial success. he has such a huge and bigoted and brainwashed following.#literally just a PR campaign called COWBOY UP and it's pictures of cowboys in bandanas#trump reinvisioned as the lone ranger fighting for the american people against covid. EASY SELL#and instead. companies bought him. it became political. it was not ''oh shit this is 1 enemy let's all be human''#it was ''you deserve to die.''#climate change should be GLOBAL. it should be like ''yeah i hate u but. we do all live here''#i don't have to LIKE my group members to do well on a team project bc we are ALL getting graded.#is that simple enough of an under-explaination lol
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putting my prediction on record now that the coming decade is going to see the rise of viral-marketed fancy at-home water filtration systems, driving and driven by a drastic reduction in the quality of U.S. tap water (given that we are in a 'replacement era' where our current infrastructure is reaching the end of its lifespan--but isn't being replaced). also guessing that by the 2030s access to drinkable tap water will be a mainstream class issue, with low-income & unstably housed people increasingly forced to rely on expensive bottled water when they can't afford the up-front cost of at-home filtration--and with this being portrayed in media as a "moral failing" and short-sighted "choice," rather than a basic failure of our political & economic systems. really hope i'm just being alarmist, but plenty of this already happens in other countries, and the U.S. is in a state of decline, so. here's praying this post ages into irrelevance. timestamped April 2023
#apollo don't fucking touch this one#serious post#not a shitpost#hope i forget about this post and have no reason to ever look back on it one day#fyi i'm aware that access to potable water is already a major issue in parts of the U.S. yes i know flint michigan exists#i'm saying that this issue is going to GROW unless local & federal governments work together to fix it.#so it's a matter of if we trust them to fix it. And well--do you?#what are the chances the government just denies there's a problem until the water actually turns brown#at which point it's already been common knowledge for years and people have just become resigned and that's our new normal#i'm mean come on. how many of us already believe that we're being exposed to dangerous pollutants we don't know about and can't avoid#like that's pretty much just part of being a modern consumer. accepting that companies will happily endanger your life for a few pennies#and the most you'll get is like a $50 gift card as part of a class action rebate 20 years down the line#probably the history books will look back on Flint as a warning and a harbinger that went ignored#luxury condos will advertise their built-in top-of-the-line filtration systems--live here and you can drink water straight from your tap!#watch the elite professional class putting $700 dyson water filtration systems on their wedding registry#while the rest of us figure out how to fit water delivery into our grocery budget while putting 90% of our paycheck towards rent#also eggs are $15
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Sterek Rival Lawyers AU
It's A (Court) Date
Imagine, high-class, Ivy League, hot-shot, attorney Derek comes back from New York to the family firm to take over as partners with his sister after his parents decide to step down. He may not be on the level of his mother yet, but he's cut his teeth against Wall Street wolves and ruthless white-collar sharks. Derek's more than proved himself, so he just can't fathom these small criminal court cases his family is making him take "before he's truly ready" to be a part of the family business.
Enter in his first case. Right out the gate, the state assigned defense is, not only late to court, but also arrives in a flurry of limbs and papers, tripping all over himself, and profusely apologizing to the room as a whole. "Sorry! Sorry! Car trouble!"
The guy is out of breath, tie crooked and hair a mess. It makes Derek wrinkle his nose at the unprofessionalism and the blatant disrespect to everyone's valuable time.
The presiding judge, the Honorable Ms. Lydia Martin, only sighs a heavy sigh, as if this sight is nothing new, and says "Mr. Stilinski, I suggest you don't let it happen again."
Derek is honestly getting annoyed by how easy this is going to be. He could've been doing literally anything else right about now rather than being here going against a common rent-a-lawyer with some Podunk community-college degree. The opening statement for the defense is laughably inept. Full of nervous stuttering, backtracking, running tangents, and babbling. He's still apologizing, trying to assure the jury that he's just having an off-day today.
It's embarrassing to watch.
Nonetheless, Derek goes through the motions, practiced and poised. Examines all the evidence, presenting times and dates, prior arrest records, the works.
During this time, Mr. Stilinski is frantically (and VERY LOUDLY) flitting through a cartoonishly large stack of papers and whispering to his client. Derek has to fight to grit his teeth through his presentation.
Finally, it's time for Mr. Stilinski to cross-examine Derek's client and, unbeknownst to him, the beginning of Derek's long, long spiral of madness for the rest of his career.
"Judge Martin, I would like to move to have this case thrown out."
"Oh?" asks Judge Martin. For some reason, there's an amused smirk, almost fond, tugging at her lips "On what grounds?"
A giddy, almost manic, grin takes over the defense attorney's face just then. "On the grounds that the prosecution's client is full of bullshit."
The judge rolls her eyes and an exasperated "Stiles," slips from her lips, seemingly against her will. (Derek's not really surprised by the familiarity between the two of them. With how often state-assigned lawyers are called to the courtroom on small cases, it wouldn't be too big of a leap to suggest they might be chummy.)
"Respectfully, of course." Mr. Stilinski--er Stiles?--winks back at her.
"Objection. Your honor, this is ridiculous."
"Overruled. Make your point, Stilinski."
"Mr. Davis says he saw my client at 12:30 P.M., on August 4th, attempting to take his back-right hubcap outside his apartment. Mr. Davis' apartment complex at that time, on that particular day, would have cast a huge shadow over the back lot as evidenced by the gaudy sundial-art-installation outside the courthouse. Meanwhile, my client's picture, when taken in for questioning, has a sunburn on the entire right side of his face. This would corroborate Mr. Lyle's story of walking home alone, down the upper, unshaded side of Elmore Street, during one of the hottest days of the year, for an hour straight. Also, the fact that Mr. Davis has no realistic idea how long it would actually take a person to steal a hubcap should be evidence enough."
"Uh-huh. And this wouldn't happen to be something you've ever had any expertise in, would it, counsel?"
"I plead the 5th."
And just like that, Derek's case is thrown out so quick, he's still reeling about it all the way home.
For the next two years, this becomes Derek's life. This man, this Stiles Stilinski, keeps showing up like a whirlwind and absolutely puts him in his paces.
Stiles, as he insists Derek call him, is a powerhouse. Relentless and unstoppable. That mouth can filibuster for literal hours (which, for those unfamiliar, is when someone legally cannot be forced to give up their time on the floor as long as they can keep talking), that brain quick as a whip, with a hunger for research, a mastery of the English language svelte enough to trip up even the most well-rehearsed lie, and an attention to detail like nothing Derek has ever witnessed before. It's like he knows every law inside and out. Lives it. Breathes it. It's like he had been raised on the law his whole life. Not only that, it's like Stiles enjoys it. Every case is a new game to get excited about.
All of it makes Derek's blood boil.
However, it's not always about losing to Stiles all the time, because, honestly, that might be less humiliating.
In truth, when faced against Stiles, Derek's bound to win about 60% of the time. Out of that 60%, only 5% of those wins actually feel earned. As for the other 55%?
He knows Stiles is letting him win.
Derek can't prove it, but he knows the asshole is holding back on purpose nearly half the time. Knowing that Stiles could have beaten him if he wanted to, but didn't, is somehow more frustrating than just losing.
He hates Stiles.
He hates that the guy is so chipper and playful all the damn time. He hates that Stiles could probably work at any firm he wanted, could make enough money to get a decent car that doesn't shit out all the time, could buy a proper-fitting suit, but instead CHOOSES to stay here "watching out for the little guy", as he so put it.
He hates that facing Stiles in court is the most challenged, the most motivated he's ever felt in his entire life. He hates that Stiles brings out in him the spark of passion and drive Derek had long thought had died. He hates that Stiles always tries to banter with him during recess or whenever they have to exchange evidence.
He hates finding out that Stiles only loses cases on purpose when his endless amounts of research points to the defendant actually being guilty of horrendous crimes, because Stiles is a good fucking person.
He hates Stiles' constant teasing and he hates that Stiles is somehow able to bring Derek down to his childish level to tease back. He hates how much he looks forward to court-dates with Stiles now. He hates being invited out by Stiles over and over to grab a bite together after a long day, as if Stiles hasn't been wiping the floor with him on this case for the last month. He hates it even more that he always accepts and that now they have their own designated booth at the diner across the street. Derek's so unbelievably frustrated, it makes him want to bite Stiles at the neck just to hear that smartass mouth squeal.
"Hey, I ever tell you I was thinking of quitting before you arrived?" Stiles asks one night as they're walking to their cars.
Derek's head immediately snaps to him at that. "What?"
Stiles smiles distantly at the thought. "Oh, yeah. Things had started feeling like being trapped in a cubicle, y'know? There wasn't any challenge in it anymore."
"What made you stay?"
"Well...you did. You were the first, serious competition I'd faced in a while. It wasn't a matter of winning just to win, anymore. Going against you always reminded me of the reason why it was important for me to win. It gave me stakes, because now there was an actual chance I could lose and an innocent person could go to jail. You, I don't know, kinda reignited my passion for fighting the good fight, I guess."
Derek can feel his heart thumping hard in his chest. He wants to say 'You did the same for me!' He wants to tell Stiles that he didn't think his life could ever be this fun or happy or messy or chaotic or exhilarating or challenging or fulfilling before coming to Beacon Hills.
But just as Derek goes to open his mouth to sing Stiles' praises, he instead finds himself roughly shoving him up against the Camaro and biting hungrily at that mouth and tongue that's been the bane of his existence. There's a surprised little squeak that Derek quickly swallows up, but it isn't long before they're both tearing at each others' clothes and fucking each other dirty in the backseat of Derek's car.
What's crazy is, after they get together, nothing in their careers really changes. The only difference is now they get to fuck each others' brains out after an intense battle in court (and the sound Stiles makes when Derek bites him is exactly what he always imagined it would sound like). They still face against each other on opposite sides in court. They still give it everything they got, no conceding even if they are dating now. Not to mention, Derek wouldn't dream of tempting Stiles over to his firm. Not when he knows Stiles is at his best staying where he's at.
The day Derek's family finally decides it's time for him to take over the firm with Laura is the best day of his and Stiles' lives.
Not only does Derek tell them he's declining, he hires Stiles as his attorney to negotiate terms against his entire family of well-seasoned lawyers.
The entire month-long negotiation results in Derek, not saying a single word, but absolutely beaming as he watches his boyfriend run circles around his mother, his father, his uncle, and both of his sisters on contracts. It's so unbelievably hot, they're banging on whatever flat surface they can get their hands on every time they leave the boardroom. There's even one very memorable blowjob in the empty hall outside the boardroom when Stiles somehow manages to get Peter to agree to a (most likely illegal) clause dictating the firm will pay Stiles a finder's fee for any pro-bono case Stiles takes on outside of Beacon Hills that strikes his fancy.
And, no one says it, but they all know Derek definitely, 100%, dragged his own firm through this negotiation just to show off how incredible Stiles is to his family and preen about it.
--
Fast-forward, Derek is going to be in the audience for the first time for one of Stiles' cases.
While waiting in the hall, Derek sees a familiar face from his New York days. The prosecution has hired the eighth best lawyer money can get, Jackson Whittemore. He's sporting a Rolex, sunglasses indoors, and the face of someone who thinks he's above literally every other person in town.
Well, at least until he sees Derek.
For some reason, Jackson seems to think Derek is all the way out in the middle of nowhere to 'watch a master at work' (which...well...is technically true...).
As Derek goes to sit in the audience, Jackson tells him in passing, "This'll be over so fast, probably won't even get a chance to learn the other guy's name."
Derek chuckles and says back, "Ooh, buddy, you have no idea."
Before Jackson can think more on that, a whirlwind of limbs and papers suddenly hurls through the doors.
Derek sits back, gets comfy, and waits eagerly for the show to begin.
My first moodboard. Hope you enjoy. AU based on a discussion with @casually-eat-my-soul (I suggest checking out their version). This was kind of like a divergence from that (the brain juices just started flowing).
#sterek#lawyer au#negotiating terms as a form of foreplay#Derek might have a competency kink#Stiles' contract states the firm will pay his salary without influencing his decisions as a shadow employee and his clients pay nothing#He's also allowed to travel anywhere he wants for a case on company dime#Unbeknownst to Derek most of the Hales had at one point in time all faced off against Stiles in court before#The only reason Derek was called back from New York in the first place was because they consider a 'Stiles Case' a rite of passage#“Getting Stiles'd” is something all Hales must go through to be humbled#The Hales call Stiles The Reaper in private behind closed doors#No one thought Derek would end up marrying the Boogeyman the insatiable nightmare creature that haunts the Hale name#And now they have to live with this court goblin as their new inlaw#For those who don't know pleading the 5th is enacting your right to not reveal information that could get you in trouble with the law#meaning Stiles has definitely stolen a hubcap off a car before which may or may not have been a police cruiser#Also pro-bono means a lawyer choosing to represent a client free of charge as a form of charity#They absolutely fucked nasty after Derek got to witness Stiles smear Jackson's smug career across the pavement#teen wolf#derek hale#stiles stilinski#tyler hoechlin#dylan o'brien#mieczysław stiles stilinski#minific
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chocobo breeds based off of real life chicken varieties :>
#anyone else wish the rebirth chocobos were. yknow. a little more creative than just recolors#'lol this one is green because it's in the jungle' BOOOOOO 👎👎👎👎👎#square enix hire me. i will lead your company to glory with cloud strife's chocobo farm sim game.#btw the rhode island red chocobos are fucking assholes. just like real reds.#and the buffs follow you around and need to know what you're doing at all times.#you will never know peace around a buff chocobo.#it will stare at you through your bedroom window while you try to sleep.#it will knock on your front door with its beak and scream if you don't answer.#and the sebrights are even tinier than the silkies but they will rip you a new one if given the chance. jsyk.#the brahmas are dumb as a bunch of rocks and sound like a foghorn. BWAAAARRK. they are very sweet and gentle tho.#ffvii#my art <3#cloud strife#chocobo
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hey webtoon artists, did you hear that
your work is cheap to produce
everything you make is cheap and your labor is cheap and that makes it very profitable for companies like webtoons
it's as easy and cheap as just owning a tablet
#boycott webtoons when?#fuck webtoons#webtoons are NOT cheap to produce#they're cheap for companies like WT to license and own because they don't have to take on any of the labor#all that labor gets passed onto the creators who are severely underpaid and overworked#they only see value in your passion and labor if it profits them#your actual efforts are apparently so cheap to them that they can use it as a flex when pitching an IPO
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You know, as much as I would've loved a massive catharsis-led triumph over Athion Zathuda in battle, possibly left at the mercy of the vibrant flames of Fearne's Titan form reiterating herself with aplomb as Fearne Calloway, I actually kinda love how the narrative chose to defeat him. In many ways it is just hilarious, but also ironically in-character. Man talked all about wanting to prove himself, had a grandiose title of 'Sorrowlord' and was looking to be both a physical and mental adversary after threatening to torment Fearne into becoming Exaltant by targeting her loved ones. But then when he is pit against Bells Hells he barely does a thing; he tries to talk his way into turning Fearne again, gets jumpscared by Ira, the 'farm girl' he mocked to Fearne commandeers his dragon, he loses a leg and is thrown off his dragon, and the Hells even opt to keep him alive for some reason in 107 before kinda accidentally offing him in 108.
He thought he was the shit, but enemies of true threat like Ludinus, Otohan and Liliana (a threat before she was turned) looked down on him, and thus his attempts to prove them wrong - while also falling into the same trap as Ashton's father in seeking out a personal destiny and being willing to see their child as a tool to do it - bore no fruit at all, he was practically an afterthought through and through, his dragon really being his entire threat level. In the end, he got killed running (well, hobbling) away, and while Gloamglut's keening was a little sad in a way that a pet cannot fathom the moral complexity of having to kill their owner he still had it coming, plus following his eternal torture in the Tiki Bar of Ligament Manor, the last sorrow he wrought was his own; he achieved nothing, everything he hints he did to get to his position was for naught, and for all the fear and danger he tried to make himself possess he truly had no power over anyone, especially not Fearne - who can only pity him and, as further proof of being better than he ever was, hope that he takes the time to reflect on his sorrows.
#critical role#cr3 spoilers#cr3#c3e108#cr spoilers#athion zathuda#fearne calloway#and look I really wanted him to die painfully I said as much when he lured Fearne from Ashton's bed with a sugar glider#but the fact that convincing the emissaries was more of an undertaking than defeating him is just hilarious#Otohan didn't have a lot of backstory but she was at least a boogeyman to BH - every encounter was 'should we run or fight for our lives?'#he's literally the one person in the c3 enemy group that gets less respect than Ludinus and everyone dunks on Ludinus#man wanted to be a BBEG but ended up a villain for a one-shot#now you're just a stretched out face in a tiki bar - watching the family you thought you could mess with be completely unaffected by you#and Fearne gets your dragon - but that was always gonna happen#Birdie and Ollie should take turns just casually throwing drinks or moldy lemon rinds at him - or just make out hard in front of him#glad you and your main character syndrome will rot forever dude - you don't mess with BH and you don't mess with the Calloways#at least he has Bor'dor's ghost for company - they can talk about berry jerky and how the creepy undead lady fucked them up
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Bow problems (+ other nonsense)
#saroart#dead cells#the beheaded#the collector#they just wanted a nice bow#the collector can do a lot of stuff but i don't think he's good at bows#i was drawing a lot of antagonistic beheaded/collector content so i wanted to do some more cute junk#okay a lot is an exaggeration. still#need some guys being buds content sometimes#weird monster guys doing domestic shit is my favorite genre#i got a bonus at holiday time and im tempted to buy a tablet i can use portably#esp because holy fuck i don't know how to draw anymore#but also i just spent stupid money on tickets to live podcasts so i probably shouldn't#unrelated im very upset today because fucking UPS didn't ring my goddamn doorbell and so “”missed me“” and couldnt deliver my specialty meds#why must i get my meds through ups#because the us is a hellscape and i am beholden to my health insurance company#ups who has literally never managed to get a package to this apartment#tbh im stressed as fuck about having to go through this every goddamn month
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i want to say, the fact that the dokibird situation is blowing up so much that not only am I seeing posts about it on my dash (I almost NEVER see vtuber stuff on my dash, and vtuber drama is even rarer) but my DAD heard about it because lawyers on twitter were discussing how fucked Nijisanji is...it's insane. I'm beginning to wonder if someone in my college class will end up asking if I've heard about it.
cuz like. my DAD. who is NOT into vtubers or anime or anything even close to adjacent to that stuff AT ALL. heard about it. from professional lawyers on twitter taking about how this is going to be taught in law classes as a prime example of "how to fuck everything up in the worst way possible."
which, again, makes the fact that this is standard japanese black company behavior even. worse.
#phoenix says boring stuff#dokibird#selen tatsuki#nijien#nijisanji#again for those who don't know what i mean by black company: please look it up#its absolutely fucked
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On the topic of "don't pre-order games! Wait until you know it's a finished product!"
Stop playing Early Access titles. Unless it's a "pre-order and play 3 days early" you're not accessing anything early. That's the state of the game in the now. That's what it is. You're paying full price for an unfinished product, with no promise it ever will be finished.
I'm so tired of seeing a new game "come out" and it's not finished, and I have two choices
Wait for it to actually be finished, perhaps over a year from now. Get hype for it. Watch other people have fun playing it. It comes out. I've lost interest in the meantime. It is now an "old" game despite just now coming out. It's old news. It was a flavor of the month last year
Or actually play Early Access. Do all the stuff there is to do. It's not much. Kind of boring. Frustrated that I'm locked out of so much content. Wait a few patch cycles for it to be "really good" and before I decide to come back to it because there's enough new content compared to when I played. That day never comes. The game is released. I only really remember that it was a percentage of being considered fun and it wasn't really that good, and I don't want to replay back through all the progress I've lost. I don't feel like playing on release.
EA is inherently a cash grab. Its either a death knell for a studio desperate to finish a project, or it's outsourced QA that pays the dev. It's not a fun little treat for all our devoted fans who really just want to help out the little guy.
They've turned "gamers don't want us releasing unfinished games" in their favor. They flipped it onto you where you're perfectly excited to be SOLD an unfinished game, on purpose, to your face.
All of this obviously with a grain of salt. BG3 clearly had a full game waiting in the wings you were just locked out of. Likely the same with Hades II right now. But take the time to consider if you're just burning yourself out on a game that you won't be able to come back and enjoy when it's actually done. Consider if it even seems like it will ever be done.
#Video games#Hades II#Palworld#Icarus#Darkest dungeon#Project zomboid#Escape from tarkov#Satisfactory#Lethal company#V rising#My time at sandrock#Idk what other games to list I'm just working off personal experience#Some of the games listed are already 1.0 released#But I don't care to play them! That's the problem#Tumblr only posts to the first 5 tags anyway#I'm now seeing that fucking Norland is in EA#They had multiple demos and closed betas and still put out in EA?#Finish your damn game#Finish your game before you sell it#I'm gonna start selling wet clay pots
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oh the absolute audacity of some schmuck giving me the runaround for a month---A MONTH---and then being looped into an email thread where said schmuck is like "so we want to do the thing Sarah was asking about, also can we finalize this by Monday?"
you dingus, I am going to ruin your fucking life because you couldn't AT ANY POINT reply to three separate emails asking "are you the person I should talk to about this?"
#I will help anyone do a thing. I will tie myself in PRETZELS helping you do a thing!#my entire job is ''help people do a thing without breaking laws.'' that's it! that's my whole job!#but you have to reply to my fucking emails. I don't care if you're a vp.#no wonder the company has to secretly manipulate you
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Overall I do think things would've gone significantly better for Martha if Donna had accepted the first offer she got from The Doctor and been in season 3. Donna would absolutely be the Number One member of the Martha defense club and would've constantly been like "SHE'S SO FUCKING COOL AND BRILLIANT AND SMART AND BEAUTIFUL AND IF YOU DON'T CHEER AND CLAP FOR HER I'M BLOWING UP THIS BUILDING" like Donna IS her living breathing hypeman. Also I think Donna would've killed the master so that whole year that wasn't? Never happened.
That being said. Rip to Martha Jones because I think she would've had a disaster bisexual moment where on either side of her is an incredibly attractive person that is ruthlessly teasing her for her crush on the other. Neither of them have figured out she has a crush on them. She is not subtle about it.
#doctor who#martha jones#tenth doctor#donna noble#tennant doctor#TO BE FAIR#i think Donna would eventually pick up on it#and she'd genuinely be so fucking nice about it#she would let her down in a way that was gentle but incredibly clear#like oh i absolutely adore you but I don't tend to feel romantically about people who are#significantly younger than me#it really is through no fault of your own im just in my late 30s#and i hope that we can still have our wonderful friendship i genuinely really love your company#whereas ten. is a fucko.
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I have nearly 10k words of masked/bracken yuri in my drive. this story has been taking some time to cook but I'm very fond of these two. they are the same pair as my other masked + bracken art. they have some crazy communication issues at first because the bracken is put off by the masked's clingyness, but she learns it's not trying to kill her and it learns to not smother so aggressively. she uses it as a large pillow and it keeps holding her hand and being very unintentionally distracting as she tries to patrol the facility
brackens squint or close their eyes as a sign of great affection and trust. like cats
they don't have concrete names yet but perhaps Myrrh (or maybe Myrtle?) for the bracken and Doe for the masked, we'll see
#my art#lethal company#bracken#masked#oc: myrrh#oc: doe#with all the masked/bracken I've been seeing I HAD to toss in my two fellas#the bracken is she/it and the masked is it/ey(/em/eirself)#I kinda fucked up their size difference a bit because the bracken is like 2x the masked's size (on average) but it's ok#masked: MY GORGEOUS NINE FOOT TALL GIRLFRIEND#bracken: don't trip and step on my bug of a partner don't step on my bug of a partner don't st DO NOT MISTAKE PARTNER FOR PREY
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welcome to rhodes island, my pharmeutical company. here we want to restore equality in society and cure a terminal disease. let me present you to some of our operators
we have dorothy franks. she's a very brillant scientist and created an huge amalgam resulting from an experience using innocents lives, which almost destroyed the entire country it was in. she's really nice and kind
there we have loughshinny dublinn, they served as the leader of a terrorist revolutionary group that caused several assaults in victoria. they did not meant it
here's w. she's also a terrorist but she meant it
hey here's lappland saluzzo. her disease has rendered her completely mad and she is behind countless slaughters. i forgot why she's here
and here's ho'olheyak, she did several murder attempts on me. we can change the subject if you want
#arknights squad concept#only terrorists#it will never fail to make me laugh how fucked up some operators are#ESPECIALLY when i try to explain the lore of some operators to friends who don't know arknights#and they are just#“what's the goal of your company already?”#yeah we're tryna cure cancer. is there something you didn't understand#arknights
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#i really don't know what to do with the placements of these galarian forms with how fucked up the galar dex is#well shit i guess cursola has a natdex number‚ doesn't it? fuck. lemme look for it real quick 'cause#if i'm going purely natdex and ignoring regional forms then technically cramorant should come next#but this one came before sandaconda in the. galar dex#UUUGHHH HOLD ON#cursola is natdex 864. compared to sandaconda which is 844. this should be like 20 later#but it's going here because idk what the fuck is happening#and also i already made this post so you get it now#cursola fans rejoice. but like. galarian weezing? that doesn't have its own natdex number but i can't find a model for it anywhere#so cramorant is next?? ugh. pokémon company step up your game please#cursola
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