#do i know how i mamaged that?

[phaedraismyusername]

✨️February Reads✨️

Completed half of a series

8 Books

3 Novellas

and 3 short stories

[lucifertoxics]

pooks whenever you can and if you want, I'm in need of some fluffy cuddling with marcus 😫😫

xx

note 💌: hiii pookie! i was so happy today to see your request that you have no idea so hopefully this mamages to help with your deluluness

--------------------------------------------------------------

my princess: marcus lopez arguello

| pairing: marcus lopez x reader

| genre: established relationship

| warning: no warnings <3

| word count: 0.4k

[ BACK TO MASTERLIST ]

Having been alone all his life, Marcus was finding sharing affection to be hard sometimes. Many would consider him a merciless killer, but once you got to know him, he wasn't how you expected him to be once you first met him.

When you and Marcus have met, you never thought that you would see yourself dating him. Once you got to know him and date him, you realised that even if he didn't know how to show affection, he tried his best when it came to you.

Tonight, you were cuddling in his bed. He was listening to the Smiths, his favorite band, while he had his arms wrapped around your waist, holding you tight. You had your arms wrapped around his neck, playing softly with his hair, as you could hear the music from his headphones.

Not long after, he took a cigarette from the packet, in his jacket. Lighting up, he took a drag from it and kissed your forehead. Closing your eyes softly, feeling his faint touch, made you feel butterflies in your stomach. Looking up to him, there was no denying that he looked so calm and relaxed. The two of you would share the cigarette, and this was one of the times. It was one of your traditions, so to say and it reminds you of the night the two of you met.

He loved when you played with his hair, even if he didn't know how to show it properly. From time to time he would kiss your forehead or your cheek, mumbling words or even phrases, such as, "I love you", "my princess" and "don't leave me". Hearing those words made you realise that you would do everything for this boy, that's how much you loved him.

Not long after he said these, you saw his eyes closing and then opening again, trying to keep himself awake, wanting to spend more time with you. Marcus kissed you slowly, still having his arms wrapped around your waist. He tasted like cigarette and mint, which made you melt the second his lips touched yours. You couldn't deny that he knew how to make you feel loved and wanted, even with some simple words.

© LUCIFERTOXICS ⎯ do not translate, plagiarise or claim any of my works as your own.

[mikaela-the-slut-expert]

Hii,so could i request headcannons with hualian xgn!reader that is usually very silly and does the most random things on accident and are quite clumsy,for example they somehow manage to trip over literal air,or manages to screw up some things accidentally(not too major but big enough to make someone go like"how do you even mamage to do that?")

Clumsy

Hua Cheng x gn!reader x Xie Lian

IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG 🙏🙏🙏😔

Ignore grammar mistakes

Slight OOC

Short. 😬

____________________________________

Xie Lian and Hua Cheng love you very much but. . . How are you even alive?

It's giving the one meme where you're standing behind a wall of flames and you're just " everything is fine"

You happen to be clumsy, some people would ever describe you as ditzy.

It's not like it's on purpose, maybe you were born with two left feet?

You knock over a lot of things by accident. Vases, glasses, pictures, people.

That's how Xie Lian and Hua Cheng know where you are in their home.

It's like dealing with a cat!

Hua Cheng has safety proofed the house for you

Any sharp edges have been rounded out, vases made out of hard material or in hard to reach places.

They don't want you to break anything and get hurt.

It's actually crazy how many bruises you have from falling or knocking a hip into the counter.

Xie Lian always patches you up though

Hua Cheng likes to beef with whatever "hurt" you.

He'll argue with walls, and vases on your behalf.

Beats them up, has gotten rid of things because they "hurt" you

You tend to fall a lot

There's nothing wrong with your legs you're just clumsy!

Tripping over air, and over your own two feet

You spend a lot of time in Xie Lian's and Hua Cheng's arms because they'd rather carry you then you fall and get stepped on.

If Xie Lian has bad luck you have worse luck.

They left you in the gambling den alone once, hoping you would be safe enough there

They came back to you on the floor wrapped in the red drapes, that are supposed to be hanging from the ceiling.

How did you even manage to get them down? How did they get wrapped around you

They only sigh and help you out of your mess.

So Xie Lian and Hua Cheng always have an eye on you.

No matter how clumsy you are they love you though!

[kuromochimi]

omg okay i saw ur requests are open so… how would bl boys react if their spouse got pregnant? can u make it angsty if you can plz😝 i like hurting myself

• MINORS DNI • MINORS DNI • MINORS DNI •

oh this plot fits our career driven boys soooo much (reo’s is his gf since I didn’t notice the spouse part from the request while I was writing his part)

Content warnings: angst, talks of pregnancy and abortion, a bit ooc bc these boys are toxic here, characters are aged up! Not proof read

Mikage Reo

Standing in front of reo had never felt as anxiety inducing as it did right now. He was your safe space, someone you’d run to whenever you felt uneasy and for the most part, he never failed to give you the comfort you needed. He was gentle, patient, and reassuring. That was… until you handed him a positive pregnancy test. As shaken as you were, reo’s world was also spiraling as he stared at the two pink lines shown on the test. Positive. He got you pregnant and right as he was at his prime as a new football player.

“No” was all he mamaged to say. “No? Reo you- you can’t just say no” you were sobbing, thinking of how you’d have to stop your studies and how you were going to have tell your parents. “I just… yn I can’t handle a baby right now. And my parents. Fuck, my parents are-“ his hands in his hair, tugging lightly in frustration. You wanted to get mad at him and scream and push him but all you could manage to do was look at him in shock. How is he the same person who cuddled you every night and bought your flowers just because. The same person who had you in his future plans and promised to marry you as soon as you both had stable careers. Amidst reo’s sweet reputation in your heart and mind, you often forgot that he was also as career driven as he was in love. Reo had already disappointed his parents once when he chose to play sports instead of working at their family’s company. Now he’s made it to a place where they can at least commend him for his choice. He can’t risk another disappointment. His parents didn’t even know he had a girlfriend.

Finding out you were pregnant, your initial response was fear which later changed to calmness because you were so sure of reo. You were so sure that he wouldn’t leave you hanging. Maybe you shouldn’t have been so hopeful after all.

Itoshi Rin

Your relationship with rin isn’t what people think it is. Sure you were married. Sure lots of his fans adored you as well. But behind the scenes, the marriage was arranged by his parents. That said, rin was never hostile. The relationship was civil, it was peaceful even. He did his thing and you did yours.

Later on in the marriage, you both decided that since you guys were married anyway, it wouldn’t hurt to add a couple more benefits along with having each other’s (quiet and to some extent, comfortable) company. Sleeping together became a regular occurrence and without meaning to, that led to you getting pregnant, something which rin had never planned on and something he definitely won’t be happy about. You weren’t happy about it either. Not when you didn’t exactly have a healthy family to give the baby to be. Acting fast, you scrambled to your laptop to schedule yourself for an appointment to get a check up and most probably to get rid of the pregnancy. Unfortunately, in panic, you left your pregnancy test on the bathroom counter. Something that rin was welcomed with once he got home. It didn’t help that you left your laptop in the bedroom for him to see your scheduled appointments as well.

Thinking you could get by without letting rin know, you decided to act normal upon seeing him enter the kitchen. You were preparing dinner when he walked in. After smiling at him and greeting him to acknowledge his presence, you went back to dinner prep. This confused rin. Were you not going to tell him? Was the test maybe not yours? Were you fucking with him? “Really yn? Don’t you have anything to say?” “hm? what do you mean, rin? Did you want something else for dinner?” He annoyingly nodded “you’re pregnant?” This made you freeze, dropping the knife on the floor, barely missing your foot. For a second, a flash of concern hit rin’s eyes but that might as well have been your imagination. “It’s a yes then” you gave a barely there nod. “Rin I was going to tell you. I also just found out I’m sorry” he nodded again “You were going to tell me? Sure. Not like you already had an appointment with the clinic, no?” Your face lost all its color. You weren’t even sure why he was acting so annoyed. Every time your parents or his parents nudged you two to give them grandchildren, rin would always act annoyed and irritable the moment you get home. He also repeatedly expressed his refusal to have children, especially not when his career was booming. Having a wife was one thing but a child? Entirely different. He didn’t have to invest so much when it came to you. He just has to be respectful, be someone to satisfy your needs sometimes, maybe even go on a few dates here and there. Easy. But he wasn’t a monster so having a child would take up so much of his time, something he couldn’t afford to give. Was what he always said. So why was he so mad at your for just taking one step ahead? “I thought you didn’t want to have a baby, why are you mad?” You semi-shouted. “Maybe I didn’t but you can’t just decide to get rid of it on your own. That’s messed up” “okay but stop raising your voice rin, you’re scaring me. You always tell me you don’t want a baby with me so I just assumed” “Know what? Considering you seem to want to get rid of it so quick, then yeah sure, I don’t want that baby. You have my card, use it for the hospital bill or call me if you need me to be there. You probably won’t though, right?”

a/n: I suck at writing angst but here’s an attempt o(TヘTo)

[uncleasad]

top ten favorite hosie fics of all time, go

What a fun Ask! 🙏 Also, are you trying to kill me?! 😂

A few weeks ago, TheDarkestHour13 introduced the concept of Hope and Rafael keeping a list of “Landon’s Top 10 deaths” in Such Is Our Fate. I commented that that particular chapter (for reasons other than the deaths list) was a Top 10 chapter of the fic, though I also noted I didn’t have an actual list of my Top 10 chapters—there were approximately 120 chapters at that point. I also thought, in a related manner, that I didn’t have a “Top 10” list of Hosie fics…and perhaps that should have been my cue to start thinking about such a thing 😂

As of late June 2024 CE, there are nearly 2600 fics in the AO3 Hosie tag and I’ve been reading since the latter part of 2019…so I’ve probably read ½ to ⅔ of them…

I came up with 7 fics right away, but as I started to make links and such, I realized that 5 of those were incomplete (ongoing, but mostly either rarely updated or, practically speaking, abandoned); I don’t know what it says about me that my “top ten favorite hosie fics of all time” is full of fics that may never be finished.

But in terms of recommendations for reading, I know lots of folks will not want to start reading a work that hasn’t been updated in years and has a high likelihood of never being finished, no matter how amazing it is (or how much someone else liked it). And even for ones that are currently ongoing, it’s possible (though unlikely) that the author could do something crazy to make me hate the fic later on. So I thought I’d spin off all those works that were incomplete into a separate list and come up with 10 favorite finished fics…I could mamage that, right? As I started trying to do that…nope, that’s not done, either; that’s been abandoned 😳 oh, what about that fic? wow, how did I forget that one?! (Like I said, are you trying to kill me?! 😂)

So…to save my life (and to stop spending hours upon hours on this), the end result is about 30 fics all-told, completed and incomplete. (I further subdivided the incomplete fics into those that are updated at least once every few months and those that…aren’t 😢) They’re ordered roughly by time, with the earlier/older fics towards the tops of the lists and the more recent ones (mostly) towards the ends of the lists. Two of the fics on the “Completed” list had promised an epilogue that has never appeared, but you can read the entire story arc, so I think it’s fair to label them as complete.

So without further ado…

Completed:

it's a date (the only problem is it's fake) by avengerskye / @avengerskye

Coffee on Monday, Flowers on Friday by Redezzy

The Missing Piece by intribridsname 

slept next to her but I dreamt of you all summer long by hackingxbiochemist

what you got (cause I want it all) by ToriWritesStories / @toriwritesstories

summer lovin' had me a blast (wait, no, that's just the leaf-blower) by AdeleDazeem

Our Last Life by taengoo1 / @taengooxlove

I'll Never Give Up Hope by O_M_Jee

HM+JS by tellingtouch

Invisible String by luthorbae

Then why's it feel so good? by callipoicepole (Killing Eve AU)

This Is Your Home by Shadowmama55 / @shadowhuntermama

Shivers (A Lifetime of crimes, but the worst was loving you.) by ch8rlie

The Stages of Grief by endgamesonly

'tis the damn season. by wandererghost (complete, though promised epilogue still outstanding)

Lizzie Saltzman, Matchmaker by TheNutcase (complete, though promised epilogue still outstanding)

In-Progress – still updating regularly or at least every few months:

Such Is Our Fate by TheDarkestHour13 / @persevereforahappyending (updated every Friday)

The Power Field by Joho_meh

4 Years, 6 Months, 8 Days by Limon_Skittles

To Know My Heart The Best (You’d Have To Cut It Out My Chest) by mambaregz

Incomplete – rarely updated, on hiatus, or orphaned:

Dive bar on the east side by Bluejay720 (7 chapters to go)

summer rush by sabrinasfadingmoon / @sabrinasfadingmoon (incomplete)

im not gonna let you go so easily by allweseeislight (1 chapter to go 🤞)

'tis the damn season by blckmaqic, LizMikaelson (1 chapter to go 🤞)

Redemption by MysticSlurp (Red Dead Redemption AU, incomplete)

Sad Bedroom Eyes by EvilPenguinRika / @evilpenguinrika (on hiatus)

Hell Hath No Fury by ElegiesEulogizeMe (Ringer AU, 6 chapters to go)

the stages of waking by dandelionlighters / @dandelionlighters (incomplete)

let’s watch it all burn down together by iris_on_the_moon (zombie apocalypse; orphaned)

A number of the authors are no longer active in writing Hosie fics (not surprising in 2024, considering), but many of them (including the authors of the incomplete works I like) have substantial catalogs, so if you read and enjoy one of these, be sure check that author’s list of other works (and of course leave kudos and comments! 🙏)

—

If anyone would like to see other fics I’ve enjoyed, there’s the fic recommendation tag here on my tumblr that captures a few from the last couple of years, and I also have a few AO3 collections of specific themes/subjects:

Hosie Zombie Apocalypse (HosieZombieApocalypse)

Hosie Summertime Vibes (SummeryHosie)

Hosie Season 2 “What If?” (Hosie_Season_2_What_If)

(I really need to start one for post-S4 fics, because there are a lot of great ones and I’m starting to forget them already.)

Sorry I couldn’t get it down to 10, @tribridsireline 😂 But I hope everyone reading finds something new and exciting to read!

[eerna]

i’ve been back on my hadestown bullshit (listening to the album on repeat) and you make such good points about the lyrics being dumbed down and how it does a disservice to the narrative and characters. it’s such an artful, creative show that constantly adapts and changes so why not take some risks with lyrics that may take a few times to sink in? that’s the beauty of listening to it through many times. i catch something new that just punches me in the gut each time (also love your hadestown art it’s so good)

Thank youuu glad you like my stuff :3 Yeah!! I think ultimately it comes down to two things, confidence and Broadway requirements. Anais Mitchell isn't hiding how much she struggled writing the show and balancing between artsy, well crafted, and understandable. She also stated many things have been cut because the show was too long for Broadway and they were required to trim it. To both I say, HUH?? First off, Anais Mitchell honed her craft to perfection. No other musical ever managed to drive me to tears with moodsetting "oohs". She wrote a godly love song that sounds like a godly love song. She deserves all the confidence in the WORLD. But she also never hid that Hadestown is a very personal story influenced by her experience as a free artist, so on the other hand, I totally get that no amount of success can ever truly heal your inner critic, and she will always keep trying to adjust her work. As for the second point, I know at least some of the dumbing down is because the audiences complained. I saw Hadestown live 5 years after seeing a bootleg of it, and in those 5 years they added so many cheap jokes and dishonest tension breaks it is Crazy. But I DID notice in older bootlegs that people laughed at inappropriate times, they seemed like they expected something funny to be happening in every scene because they went to a musical and so picked some really weird spots, which doesn't happen in any of the recordings of the new jokey edition. So in dumbing itself down, the musical mamaged to become more understandable to the audience at large. In fact, even after all the changes, at the theater I overheard people talking in the pause, and they agreed the show is "too confusing" and "they can't tell what exactly is happening and if it is real or not". I can imagine that is a frustrating experience when you paid a good chunk of money to see a show, but also bro, google is Right There. Most people just don't have the will to sit down and listen to a pretty piece of media multiple times to figure it out! And sadly shows can't survive only on those who do! To bring this long ramble to a close, we are right back to art existing under capitalism and how one can't simply make GOOD art, they need to make PROFITABLE art, and that is pretty sucky

[silverfirewolfsurtleaus]

Sooo I was playing Plants vs Zombies and just

Au where in the apocolypse time line early on Donnie ends up recreating the pvz plants and accidently made them immune to being krangafied.

Yes its a weird au do I care no!

Notes

All plants have their apperance from the game they were introduced in. This means gravebuster especally (yes Im one of the people heavily disastfied with its redesign)

The sun producing plants are either kept in the green house for making sure the plants they eat are healthy or paired with a magnagrass.

Gravebusters instead of eating graves and spitting out money eat krang matter/poisoned things/ect and spit out clean dirt/water/air ect

Marigolds dont produce money (what need do they have for it in the apocolypse?) Instead they act as sentries and/or other roles needed of them (suggestions are welcome)

Potted plants are made to be mobile

Chompers notably leave lots of healthy soil under their roots.

Leo wonders how donnie mamaged this

Donnie wants to know what he did to make them immune to being krangafied

Each theres a sub devision now in charge of making sure these plants grow helathy

Yes the plants are loyal to the resistance and the resistance only. The Krang and any bandits cant take them and try and turn them on them.

Yes they fuck with Krangs atempts to corrupt the earth and make it like their planet.

Honestly dumb fun brain worm I had to share

[ftmtum]

your "going to a city where nobody knows me while wearing a big fake pregnant belly, too big to be mistaken as a man's beer belly" idea is on my mind again.

imagine happily riding and waddling around the city all day, fake tits bouncing on top of your huge belly, enjoying all the city has to offer. at least what you can waddle far enough to see, as heavy as you are, enjoying being so unmistakably pregnant. then, as youre on the train to your home (on a seat a stranger offered you, since youre obviously less able to stand considering how far along you appear to be) you could swear you feel a fluttering inside your stomach. but that's impossible, right? and your trousers feel tight around your hips, but maybe they just shrank in the wash and you accidentally ate for four at lunch. your chest feels heavier than usual, but maybe you're just tired.

you finally make it home, heavy and exhausted, but are enjoying yourself too much to want to take off your fake belly. just peel off your trousers and order takeawat, waddling to the door and feeling so /huge/ as you struggle to bring the plate inside. stuff yourself on it to a tv show you watch on your phone, maybe take a picture of your huge, baby-daddy body under your shirt. end up falling asleep like that, pinned down.

wake up slowly in the morning to a hard kick from inside your belly, and an unmistakable wetness on your chest. another kick and your hand moves to soothe your belly. but...your eyes blink open to unmistakable distortions on the surface of your bump, even through the fabric of your shirt. fuck, are you- you're actually pregnant! must be months along, almost full term! you slooooowly mamage to force yourself into a sitting position, pulling your shirt off to see your enormous, distended belly, belly button long since popped, tits huge and milky atop it, and if you twist your neck you can see your enormous hips on either side.

all you can really do now is enjoy yourself and wait, to see whether your water breaks in a month or two - or whether you have a full nine months to get through like this, only getting bigger...

😳😳😳😳

the only thing id have to add is. you're right that in this scenario there'd be no way to know if i was gonna keep growing... but thered also be no way to know whether i was ever gonna give birth at all...

[golden-hourz]

[radio static noises could be heard before it faded out.]

- "Alrighty.. is the mic on?"

- "..."

- "Are we live?-"

- "..."

- "Oh- Lets get this whole thing started then, yeah..?"

- "..."

- "107.5 KJ radio coming live to your local radio! I'm your host, Gold, and we have a special guest for our debut here today! Mind introducing yourself, red?"

- "..."

- "Great to have you here today, Red! Now, before we go onto our main story today, we have a few simple trivia questions that you guys asked! And when you ask, we answer!"

- "..."

- "Alright.. first up, what typings would we be as pokemon! Neat question, really! To answer this.. hmm.. Fire/Rock! Both passionate and resiliant! What about you Red?"

- "... ... ... ..."

- "Great answer!"

- "Alright, next up.. What type do we have the most of, and what type do we have the least of? I have a lot of normal types in comparison to other types, but I only have one of each rock type.. You, Red?"

- ".... ..."

- "Interesting!"

- "Final question before we go into our story for today! Do you catch pokemon, battle them, or leave them be? Personally, I leave them be unless the come to me first. All my pokemon chose to be with me essentially! What do you do Red?"

- "...."

- "I figured you would!"

- "Onto our main story today after this short break!"

[A 30 second advertisement would play for the Game Corner in Goldenrod city.]

- "And we're back! Now, our main story today is something no one really knows about, an unrecorded battle, the Johto and Kanto champions against each other on top of Mt Silver!"

- "..."

- "So, first things first, I think it would be appropriate to start from the beggining.. a little before the battle. Basically, the climb up Mt. Silver.. Let me tell you. It. Is. COLD. I was scared my limbs were gonna freeze off up there! The pokemon are some of the strongest up there as well, putting up quite the fight if unprepared."

- "..."

- "It took at least six hours for me to climb up to the top of the mountain from the base as well. They had loads of rescue crews at every possible point up that mountain due to how rough it is as well. And boy, is it a tripping hazard, right Red?"

- ".....!!"

- "Heh, yeah. You are petty clumsy. The entire thing was actually perfect training honestly, a perfect challenge as a champion, and it really tests the bond between you and your pokemon! Im glad none ran off, it was a pretty scary climb."

- ".... ......."

- "Really? Thats pretty surprising.. Didn't expect that from your pokemon, actually."

- "....?"

- "Right, the battle. It was..intense."

- "..."

- "On both ends, yeah. It was honestly eye widening to be able to battle someone the same strength as me and my pokemon as champion honestly, it's pretty rare!"

- "..."

- "Yeah, definitely! Countering each others teams was pretty hard, we mamaged to get each other down quite a bit.."

- "..."

- "okay.. but either way, it was pretty close on both ends. Thankfully, Snorlax was pretty slow.."

- "...."

- "Im just being honest, cmonnn, you know hes not the fastest around."

- "..."

- "before we talk about the end, I think the start is a better place. I sent out Typhlosion to start with, Red his pikachu."

- "..."

- "Yes, I know it has a name.. But the audience doesnt know that."

- ".."

- "Right, right, continuing. I started with an earthquake, he went with a thunderbolt, but I hit first, quickly one-shotting."

- "..."

- "Mhm. Once Red sent out blastoise, I went with a wild charge, dealing half Blastoise's HP, he went with a flash canon which.. was not very effective. A second Wild Charge though, and Blastoise was quickly downed! Typhlosion was at 3/4 HP."

- "..."

- "Yeah, Flash canon wasn't a great idea.. Anuway, Red sent his Lapras out next, which I used Flare blitz against to try and widdle it down, not having any moves that were super effective against it."

- "..."

- "Yeah, switching out would've been better.. His Lapras used Brine, which downed Typhlosion quickly, where I would send out Tyranitar!"

- "..."

- "That had a mega stone, yeah."

- "...?"

- "Oh, I got it from a gift in Kanto, someone from Kalos gave me it."

- "..."

- "Oh- yeah, I should get back to the story before I lose track of it and start ranting about Mega Evolution.. I would mega evolve as Lapras used Blizzard, which missed when Tyranitar activated its sand stream ability. A single stone edge though, and the Lapras was down in one shot!"

- "..."

- "Yeah, it was a little of an unfair advantage, but Oak said it was fine to use, so I did"

- "....."

- "Yeah, yeah.."

- "..."

- "Yeah, after you sent your Venusaur, it used Frenzy Plant, which knocked 2/3 of Tyranitars HP down! However, it did need to recharge after, letting me land two Fire Punches and knocking it down within two moves."

- "..."

- "Onto the Snorlax, yep! This thing was a little more difficult than the others on my side, managing to knock 1/6 of Tyranitars HP down and getting him into the red after it used Dragon dance."

- "..."

- "The Tyranitar did go down, yes, but I still got Snorlax down to a sliver of HP before Red took out Charizard to prevent Snorlax from fainting."

- "..."

- "I didn't really sweep you though"

- "... ..."

- "It still took half my team"

- "..."

- "Yeah, yeah.. Cmon, losses happen all the time.. Lets get onto the last of the battle, yeah?"

- "..."

- "Not expecting the switch, I hite the charizard with fire punch, which only cut down a little under a third of its HP, I quickly switched out afterwards, going to my Tentacruel to finish the Charizard off!"

- "..."

- "I set up first with a Toxic Spikes, and took it down to a sliver of HP with Surf, and it took itself out with Flare Blitz, leaving Snorlax left as Tentacruel was at 1/6 HP left."

- "..."

- "One final move was left.. all or nothing.. With one last venoshock, I took down the Snorlax, giving me the grand victory!"

- "..."

- "A rematch?"

- "...."

- "After the radio broadcast? you know what, why not, haven't had a battle in awhile anyway."

- "..."

- "Oh, you're right, we're just about out of time... Anything else you want to say, Red?"

- ".... Words are unnecessary."

- "It was great having you as a guest here, Red! The suns down, so get out of town!"

[The radio would go back to silence before kicking back to the usual music stations.]

// this took ~ 5 hours to write

// also minor pokepasta reference :3

// i didnt fully proof read this (fixing while writing) so things may have typos/grammatical errors

[cepheusgalaxy]

Ok but I had a really neat dream tonight:

Little mix of Heroes and BSD and KnY and Assassination Classroom (?)

There is this villain who can "brand" people and make them become his domestic pets. They have to obey him and do his chores, etc. The villain is the leader of a villain team (a coven) and has a daughter (like Elle, daughter of Bob, from Heroes). The daughter also has his brand (except that is consensual and he doesn't order her around--its more of a thing to keep them connected and be able to protect each other knowing their locations--) and so do many other people on the team. Villain collects a lot of pets. But there is this one who is a part of the heroes/vigilante agency. In my dream, Villain captured MC (hero), that looked a lot like a mix of Meine and Megan, and then captured Nagisa (from Ansatsu Kyoushitsu) and Karma (from the same anime lmao) to keep as his pets. In the end, MC mamaged to escape with Villain captured and Villain's daughter followed them. They went to MC's base, and MC hid Villain in a shelve. MC's teammates then, got a very big pillow and pretended Villain was inside it, using it to distract Villain's daughter. When she found out villain was not, in fact, in the pillow, dhe followed two twin characters (she/her and she/her) into the backyard (whos also a training campus) of the Safe House, coz they had a pillow and Villain's Daughter figured Villain was inside it. The twin girls atracted her into a trap, that was very hard to get out from, but since the twins had grew up there, they easily got out. (It was a tobogan with waves and waves of 1k and 2k of little mishievous dangerous toys-kind of things lil robots.) Then, they managed to kill Villain after getting information of him and MC could finally relax.

Detail: i rlly had some Muzan from KnY vibes from the Villain guy, and I think he got his power in a similar way? And the people he branded had different fractions of his *power*, and Daughter and MC were his favorites (well, mc as a pet, ofc) so they had the most power

I visualized a very domestic vibe for the whump there, tho i cant remember exactly how. Had BSD Armed Detective Agency vibed the whole time.

Anyways, I had a little of the setting too: (at that point i was a little awake so i could reason it)

There are this Agencies, y'know? They are like the armed detective agency of bsd and they are the "teams"/"homes" of vigilante heroes. There is a whole instituition to mediate them. There is like, a set of rules that every Agency has to follow, but one of the rules is that each Agency must have its own set of private rules. When you visit anither agency you have to look out for their rules.

Then theres the Covens. They are like agencies, but for villains. Im not sure about the rules thing (for agencies i think there were 6 general, including the "include personal rules here" one), but they were mediated by some evil institute i think lmao

And that was it

[ochnoe]

I hate having a Bad Sensory Day (TM) at work, because it's already a loud environment with all the fume hoods and reactors running constantly, and I really just want to go do routine work and be conforted by that. And not interact with people too mich because staying civil during any kind of interaction on days like that is a struggle.

And some days I can do that but some days (like today) there will not be a lot of routine work and I will have to interact with people no mattter what.

My project mamager is a genuinely nice and good dude and I always feel bad when I get annoyed or court with him bc I'm having a Bad Day.

Like please I know you mean well with your suggestions on how to streamline my process on the reactor, but I cannot fucking handle a deviation from my usual routine right now please leave so I can just do my thing. And I really appreaciate you asking my opinion and suggestions on how to proceed with this project but all I can think right now is that my binder has rolled up again, my nose is stuffy, everything is too loud, I can feel my mouth in an uncomfortabel way and I am going insane, please leave so I can hide on the toilet and at least fix my binder, if I have to stand next to you while you are thinking out loud about what to do for a minute longer while I have to sand next to you and try to listen because it's polite I might have an actual meltdown in the middle of the lab.

Now I'm on lunchbreak and my collegaue keeps chewing his food (in a normal fashion probably but it is Too Loud right now) and coughing and somewhere somone is vacuuming and I am going insane.

[rmfantasysetpieces1]

Who are these three influential and powerful men? And why do they really matter, to anyone that cares about #African #Football?

From Osasu Obayiuwana

News source

https://twitter.com/osasuo/status/1599773702991667200

Exclusive: The planning and management of this new event, to start in August 2023, are in the hands of the THREE ITALIAN men you see below. Who are they and what are their roles? Keep reading, as I make my posts, on this thread.

This is former Italian tennis player Eno Polo. A consultant to @FIFAcom , he is the CEO-designate of the company that will be formed to manage the #AfricaSuperLeague, outside @CAF_Online . The company is to be based in #Kigali, #Rwanda.

This is Romy Gai, @FIFAcom ’s Chief Business Officer and former CEO of the UAE Football League. He was Chief Revenue Officer at @juventusfcen for 14 years. Gianni Infantino has put him in charge of developing the #AfricaSuperLeague concept.

And this is @andreasartori94 , the CEO of Football Benchmark - https://footballbenchmark.com/home - “the agency in charge of working on the format and business plan of the competition,” according to my source, one of the best-informed people in African football.

Having spoken to a few sources, I am made to understand they are yet to square the financial circle for the #AfricaSuperLeague. Even with a supposed business plan that projects over $250m per annum in income, it will not put the competition into profit.

According to the plans, the #AfricaSuperLeague board will have @CAF_Online & @FIFAcom members, which begs the question - How can FIFA be directly involved in the mamagement of a @CAF_Online competition? And here's another question - will CAF control the competition?

As my sources have explained it to me, "No one from @CAF_Online has a clue about this competition. Everything is being conceptualised by @FIFAcom ."

"The big question that has to be asked," said an FA president, "is what is the involvement of the CAF executive committee in the whole process? Is the governance of African football still in Africa? Or Zurich? They really have to consider their positions in all of this."

There is a lot more that I could say. But if I do, it will be traced to some of my sources, which can't happen, as there will be blowback for them. I will make further posts on what i know, as I am able. Stick around these pages.

#RMSoccer

[zundely]

I do love a good banter analysis. And It did also bring to my attention something I admitably missed in my previous rant on Varric- and it's that he has similar feature to Cole in that whatever company he is paired up with you will get some amazing characterwork out of it. He is a perfectly suited character for both a little meta humor as well as to establish something about other characters since he is incredibly good a prodding.

Still what I wish for is that game just went an extra mile in proving the point it already made- that Varric for all his charm and witty banter already has a found family and to him Inquisition will always play a second fiddle. I personally see that as most interesting part of Varric- the way he mamages to fully integrate into a group but always leave just enough space so that he only shares with them what he wants to share.

The way I read Varric is that he at first sticks around for Inqusition because he sees it as potential threat to his family- the calling, red lyrium, Cass insistance on finding Hawke. It all goes back to Kirkwall and Varric cannot let anything happening to Kirkwall gang.

Still I regret that there is never really a moment where it' utylized to it's full potential. There is no mask-off moment even if precisely the thing Varric feared happens and Inquistion leads to Hawke's death. There is also little change in banter to signify just how big of a shift it was for him.

Varric sadly has, at least to me, some traits of author's favourite in that he is perfect vehicle for meta commentary and laying out exposition. He knows people, he is incredibly aware and knows way more then he is usually letting on. That means he can be incredibly useful but also because he is such fun character to put against other characters, there can be little for him to stand on his own.

Still, I agree with a lot of the banter analysis and how it enriches the game. Thank you for another delicious food for thought!

The Importance of Banter: Varric Tethras

So one of the more interesting takes I've gotten on my breakdowns of Dragon Age characters is the argument that Varric in terms of character development is one of the lesser characters in the game.

He stays the same, doesn't change much from beginning to end, and while enjoyable, his inclusion doesn't add nearly as much as some of the other characters in the game, and relies way too much on the goodwill from da2 to do most of the legwork for his inclusion in the game.

Now this isn't an argument without merit, I might agree a lot with this take... If it wasn't for the inclusion of one Dragon Age's staples, and one of the aspects that Inquisition arguably does better than ether ADO or DA2.

Character Banter.

Character Banter is extremely important because it gives us an insight into how characters think, how they interact, and showcases the more subtle elements that aren't always on display in the game itself.

Compared to the rest of the Characters, Varric is a bit different in that because he was a companion in the previous game, we can see how he's changed since the previous game.

Cassandra Pentaghast

So it's not an exaggeration to say that Cassandra and Varric has what is easily the most dynamic relationahip between any of the companions, having far and away the most interactions together out of party(And thats not even including the fact that all of DA2 is technically them talking to each other.

And this is reflected in their banter as well, where the two of them go back and forth like a married couple.

The thing that most be understood about Cassandra and Varric's banter though, is the fact that Varric is way, way smarter than Cassandra, who isn't dumb, but is not a genius by any stretch, which is reflected in the Dwarf's tendency to run rings around her all the time.

Cassandra: Have you heard from any of your Kirkwall associates Varric?

Varric: You're asking me? So you don't read my letters?

Cassandra: You're no longer my prisoner, much as you like to act like it.

Varric: Yet I still get all the suspicion.

Cassandra: I am not without sympathy, especially given recent events.

Varric: Why, Seeker, I would never accuse you of having sympathy! By the way I tend to refer to my "associates" as "friends". Maybe you're not familiar with the concept.

Cassandra: (sigh)

---

Varric: You know, Seeker, for someone with your tact and charisma you assembled a... pretty good little Inquisition. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming you didn't drag them all here by force.

Cassandra: How kind of you.

Varric: I mean, you never know, you could have kidnapped Ruffles and she'd be too polite to say anything.

Cassandra: Leliana recruited Josephine. They're... friends.

Varric: So there's a rational explanation after all. Just when I thought you had layers.

---

Varric: It makes sense that Leliana did the recruiting when the Inquisition started. Not everyone can be intimidated into signing up after all.

Cassandra: I recruited Commander Cullen.

Varric: Lucky him.

Cassandra: He has made no complaints about my manners.

Varric: His last boss was a raving lunatic who turned into a statue. That's not a high bar.

All of these three bits of banter is from early in their shared chain, and illustrates their dynamic very, very well. Varric reads Cassandra like an open book, and is able to completely take control over a situation just by playing the role of the ass who is just sniping at her because he feels like it, when what he's actually doing is maneuvering the conversation so it can end on him having the last words by playing on the things Cassandra knows she cannot refute without lying.

That takes a lot of sponanous wit and an ability to think on the spot, something cassandra does not possess, but Varric has in plenty.

Of course this dynamic is only at the start as they have plenty more as the story develops. One innparticular is their relationship regarding Varric's liturature, which is one of the more entertaining side quests in the game, but it does tell us more about them in the followup banter.

Varric: Seriously? Swords and Shields? How did you find that serial? Scrape it off the bottom of a barrel in Dust Town?

Cassandra: It was research! I thought I might learn more about the Champion.

Varric: I did write a book about the Champion. You might remember it. Had your knife stuck through it last I saw.

Cassandra: I already read that one. Twice.

Here we learn how much Cassandra actually loves to read Varric's work, but more importantly we get something we rarely see in Varric. Him talking about his own failures.

Varric likes to pretend he's this amazing writer who always produce masterpieces, as he himself says to Bianca, as if he'd write about his own failures and mistakes...

And yet there is swords and shields, a book that Varric has deemed an abyssmal failure. A joke, a mediocre piece of trash not worth the paper it was printed on... And yet it has it's fans. This work that varric despises still managed to find an audience, and despite how much satisfaction he had smugly giving it to Cassandra, that still grinds his gears.

People shouldn't like his bad work. It should be forgotten in favor of his masterpieces. A very dwarven way of thinking.

Varric: I can't believe you picked the absolute worst of my books to read. Why not Hard in Hightown?

Cassandra: I have enough mysteries and investigations of my own.

Varric: What? You don't want to solve more in your spare time?

Cassandra: Then you killed my favorite character in Chapter 3, so I threw the book across the room.

Varric: Ah, a critic. Say no more.

In this one, we get Varric both genuinely questioning Cassandra, as he seems to have assumed she actually does like investigating mysteries(she does not), but also tries to nudge her over to read High in Hightown instead.

Cassandra: Varric, how could you let the Knight-Captain be framed for murder?

Varric: Well, I did spent three entire chapters setting it up.

Cassandra: But she didn't deserve it! You'd already put her through more than enough!

Varric: Look, Seeker, if you love a character, you give them pain, ruin their lives, make them suffer. Maybe even throw in a heroic death.

Cassandra: That makes no sense!

Varric: You care enough to argue. If she had a nice afternoon and took a nap, you'd stop reading.

I could deconstruct this, but basically it's just a bit of meta commentary on what makes a good story. Not only will it not be the last, but it's not even the most blatant. After all, this one could apply to other people besides Hawke.

Cassandra: What made you write about Hawke? All your other books are complete fiction.

Varric: Someone had to set the record straight about the Champion.

Cassandra: Yet your book is still full of lies.

Varric: But true ones. That's important.

Varric loves stories... But he understands what stories are at their heart. The difference between a Recounting, and a Tale. That's what history is after all, the Tales everyone passed down.

And what good tale doesn't have a bit of exaggerated bullshit?

Cassandra: Why is the second Hard in Hightown so completely different from the first?

Varric: (sigh) Because I didn't write it. Shit, did you pay actual coin for that book? One of these days, I'm going to find the duster who wrote that garbage and introduce him to my editor.

Cassandra: By "editor," do you mean your crossbow?

Varric: No, my actual editor. Best in the business. She runs half the Coterie in Kirkwall. Stickler for grammar. She once killed a man over a semicolon. I'd never print anything without her.

This one is more meta commentary, but it does have a bit more meat to it. Varric's whole spiel about his editor being super powerful in the Coterie could be the truth, it could be complete bullshit. Or it could be something in between.

That's not the important part. The important part is that he wants Cassandra to guess, to assume, to speculate, because that is far more powerful than just laying it all out could ever be.

Cole: She has to reach the other side of the hill.

Cassandra: Who does?

Cole: The Knight-Captain. But she's injured.

Varric: (sigh) Good job, Kid.

Cassandra: Is she alright? Is that how the book ends?

Varric: Not anymore.

Cassandra: Cole, what happens to her?

Cole: I don't know. The hill went away.

So here we see that Varric is one of THOSE authors. You know the kind, the ones who will rewrite an entire storyline because the big twists was leaked ahead of time.

Itxs bot that important in the grand scheme of things, but it's interesting how through the game we see a very consistent picture of how Varric likes to write. He's a gardner variety writer, but unlike GRRM he's not the kind thst sticks to what he had in mind and sets up if the big twist is learned before it's finished.

As for His banter with Cassandra related to Hawke, it's entertaining, but not exactly that enlightening. Except for one.

If you chose in DA2 to save carver or Bethany by making them grey wardens, you get this bit when Cassandra Questions him about them.

Varric: Aveline took him off somewhere when the Calling started going nuts, but he'll tag along. He always does.

Varric: Aveline took her off somewhere when the Calling started going nuts, but she'll try to keep Hawke out of trouble.

Cassandra misses the obvious, but you probably didn't.

Varric knew about the calling from the start. Oh he didn't know the details, and he didn't know why... But he knew there was something up with the calling from the very start, and probably figured out this was the key reason from day one.

And he didn't share it. At all.

That speaks volumes of where his true loyalties lies, and it's something a lot of people miss.

Cassandra is right. Varric's heart will never truly belong to the Inquisition so long as Hawke and his Kirkwall friends exists outside of it.

There is also a turning point in their conversations, starting around the point where Varric's personal quest with Bianca happened.

Cassandra: Am I to understand your Bianca is married?

Varric: Oh, have we reached the stage where we gossip about each other's love lives?

Varric: Did you hear that, boss? Don't worry, I'll tell you whatever she says.

Cassandra: Forget I mentioned anything. It was a simple question, Varric.

Varric: There was nothing simple about it.

Varric actually blatantly questions wheter they've reached the point where they are now talking about each others love with each other. The truth is though, they actually have.

Varric: You brought up Bianca, Seeker. Does that mean I can ask about your conquests?

Cassandra: I would rather you didn't.

Varric: No tantalizing secrets to divulge?

Cassandra: None.

(If the Inquisitor is in a relationship with Cassandra)

Varric: So no one within, say, a five foot radius has caught your eye?

Inquisitor: Really? No one at all?

Cassandra: This... is not a discussion I want to have here.

Varric: (laughs) Are you blushing, Seeker? Maker, the world really is coming to an end.

Or

Inquisitor: Perhaps Cassandra—and her conquest—would rather not discuss this in public.

Varric: Spoilsport.

Or

Varric: Nothing? You do know he's standing right there...

Cassandra: I... have no conquests.

Varric: How about dalliances? Liaisons? Illicit affairs?

Cassandra: No.

Sera: Enough poking, Varric.

Varric: Is it, Buttercup? Is it?

It a rather humorous affair, but it does show that Varric at this point is comfortable prodding Cassandra's love life, figuring out how far he can push.

Which speaks for itself at how close these two have gotten at this point.

Cassandra: Very well, Varric. If you wish to know about men I have known, I will tell you.

Varric: Look, Seeker. I was only...

Cassandra: You are right. I pried first, and fair is fair. Years ago, I knew a young mage named Regalyan. He was dashing, unlike any man I'd met. He died at the Conclave.

Varric: Oh.

Cassandra: What we had was fleeting. And years had passed. Still, it saddens me to think he's gone.

Varric: I'm sorry.

Nothing to add here, just that Varric sorta gets sad when he realizes that was friendly prodding touched a very bitter and sad point from Cassandra's pain.

For which he apologizes.

Varric: Look, Seeker, I didn't mean to make you talk about your mage friend.

Cassandra: I know. I was not trying to make you speak of Bianca. If I was, you would know. I would yell, books would be stabbed.

Varric: (Chuckles.) I'll keep that in mind.

Also as the game reaches the end section, Varric and Cassandra begin to really banter in a much more friendly way.

Cassandra: I still don't understand how drakes take that hand.

Varric: ...Hmm. Maybe we should start you on Shepherd's Six.

Cassandra: Isn't that a children's game?

Varric: Yeah.

When trying to teach Cassandra card games at this point in the story, Varric has the perfect set up for a punchline like he did in the early game, but he doesn't use it, because he isn't mocking cassandra here, he's genuinely trying to teach her how to play cards.

And so he suggest starting her off with something simple, like a card game for children, cause he understands thats where she has to start at her level.

There are plenty more, but most of it is just well written, engaging or funny back and forths. But before moving on, i wanna highlight two of them.

Varric: Did you really think the Conclave had a chance of making peace, Seeker?

Cassandra: You do not?

Varric: What was the Divine's plan? Bring everyone together and hope really hard that they would all get along?

Cassandra: Most Holy did not confide her plan to me. Perhaps she thought they were tired of death and conflict.

Varric: Oh, when is that ever been true? For Templars or mages.

Cassandra: I will not mock a dead woman, Varric. She did what she could, and that is more than most.

This conversation is very important for one simple reason. It showcases how much Varric has changed since DA2. Varric used to be one of the big believers in compromise in that game. He didn't come out and say it out right, because in that game the Templar far and away were the more evil faction, and so there was way more chances for Varric to stick up for mages, but Varric really, REALLY didn't want the mages and Templars to go to war.

He had so many friends in both factions, friends he knew would die if it ever did come to true blows.

I would say that varric was probably the best example of what neutrality in such a situation should have been. Someone who is neutral because he understood thst fundamentally, both sides even at their worst, were people. Not demons, not monsters, but human beings or elves. But unlike many others who clamor for neutrality, Varric wasn't stuck up his own ass about it.

If he saw one side go over the ljne, regardless of which it was, he would not just stand by wheter it was power hungry necromantic blood mages, or Templars like Ser Alrik.

But here, he mocks the very idea of neutrality. He has completely given up on it, and he's accepted that the only solution here, is for one side or the other will have to decisively crush the opposition.

Of course he doesnt come out and say it like that, but that's the message to take away here. So long as there is a templar or mage on the field, this war will continue. He doesn't like that fact, but he has accepted it.

Cassandra: I hear reconstruction is progressing well in Kirkwall.

Varric: I know things are bad there.

Cassandra: I wasn't trying to...

Varric: You weren't trying to remind me how bad is it in Kirkwall? So you decided to talk about it?

Cassandra: About its recovery!

Varric: What you're talking about are the buildings, and even that will take years. People don't recover so easily.

Kirkwall, that is to say, the Kirkwall Varric was born in, grew up in, and spent the happiest years of his life(When he was running there with Hawke), is dead and gone, and never coming back.

He is never getting it back.

Which will be very important for the next companion's banter.

Blackwall

Blackwall is different than the rest of the crew in that he's utterly reliant on the Banter to have any sort of presence. He has no charisma in the actual game, but he does showcase a much more entertaining character in banter.

In regards to Varric though, his mian purpose is to showcase aspects of Varric we don't often see.

One of the most important comes very, very early into their relationship.

Blackwall: I once met a dwarf who made the best home-brewed ale.

Varric: I once met a Grey Warden who got possessed by a spirit and then blew up a Chantry and killed a hundred people. What makes people think you want to hear what others of "your kind" have done, anyway?

This is a moment that is:

1. Very uncharacteristic of Varric, who usually loves talking about other people if he gets any excuse to do so, and will be demonstrated in a very similar moment in his banter with the Iron Bull, only with a different reaction.

2. It's here to showcase Varric's hatred for Anders. Other than Sebastian, Varric misses pretty much the entire DA2 cast, his true best friends... Except for Anders.

Varric LOATHES Anders for his actions, for kickstarting the Mage Templar War and getting lots of his friends killed, but also for destroying his home and making his own worst fear come true.

Varric's biggest fear as shown in the fade is becoming his parents... And that's exactly what he has become in DAI. The depressed exile from a home city that he can never return to, and if he does, it won't be the same life they miss so dearly. Varric misses Kirkwall. He misses it's people, the Hanged man, and always thinking back on the glory days of his life.

And he misses Hawke.

All lost to him and never coming back, all thanks to Anders. Varric can never return back to that time, that place, that era, that friend group that was the highpoint of Varric's life, because the city of Champion Hawke and Varric the sidekick is as dead and gone as his parents.

The hanged man will never be the same, Hawke will never be the revered Hero they were after act 2, and every single one of the countless friends that Varric misses will not come back.

And so he hates Anders with a level of hatred he reserves for very, very few people.

The rest of Varric's starting relationship with Blackwall is about him trying to figure out what makes him tick, innitially pegging him as another Sebastian. Boring, safe, droll.

He also has more banter where he shows how depressed he actually is about Kirkwall.

Blackwall: I've been to Kirkwall. The Hanged Man, actually, probably been twenty years now. It was a dive if I remember correctly.

Varric: It's the dive. Filled with the best and worst people in the world.

Blackwall: Yes, I heard it was a haunt of yours.

Varric: Haunt? It was home.

He finally clicks with Blackwall, as they get into a shared passion nobody else in the party has. Jousting. The sport consistent of knocking people of horses with pointy sticks.

As a Free Marcher Varric has grown up with the Grand Tourney as a focal point of his identity, and loves the sport, so he and Blackwall bonds and argues over the sport, with the most notable part being their disagreements over who is the better jousting knight, where he also gives his own cents in the form of a meta commentary between who is the better protagonist, the Hero of Ferelden or Hawke.

Blackwall: You can't really think Reeve Asa is a better knight than Honorine Chastain. Her record's flawless. Four hundred jousts, never unseated. No one's ever come close to it.

Varric: Oh, she's easily the most skilled. That's a fact. It's just "scrappy" is better than "flawless." I like heroes who try their damnedest, even if they fail a lot. It's easy to be valiant when you always win and everything goes your way. There's nothing great in that.

The rather unsubtle meta message here, is comparing the protagonists of the first games.

The warden is the stronger, more skilled and more competent protagonist who ultimately always triumphed, changed the world, and became heralded far and wide as the greatest hero of her age.

Meanwhile Hawke is the scrappy underdog hero who always gets back on their feet regardless of how hard they fall, and never actually suceeds in anything. Hawke is a failure Hero who couldn't save their mother, their city, at least one of their siblings, maybe two, Ketojan, couldn't prevent the Qunari attack, and constantly failed to save the day through DA2.

Now i don't really agree with this rather simplistic reading of the Warden, but it's a good scene, because it shows that Varric is more than capable of overlooking all the work, effort and time it takes to produce a "perfect" result, as well as show that Varric has a very hard preference for underdogs, and the stories they produce.

Which leads into his reaction when Blackwall confesses his sins.

Varric: Maybe I've been too hard on you.

Blackwall: Oh, so you don't think I'm dreadful now.

Varric: Actually, I thought you were boring before. Completely different. We're all dreadful. Every one of us, fundamentally flawed in a hundred different ways. That's why we're here, isn't it? Take all the risks, so the good people stay home where it's safe. With the whole "Blackwall" thing, you told a story so compelling even you started to believe it.

Blackwall: That's much nicer than saying "You're a dirty liar.", I'll take it.

Varric: A story-teller's got to believe his own story, or no one will.

Here we can gleam a sad fact. Varric very pointedly notes "we're all dreadfull", as Us, as in, him included.

Varric doesn't really consider himself a good person anymore, if he ever did.

It's not like the Varric of Yesteryear considered hinself a saint or some knight in shining armor, but there was a sense that he was happy with himself during that game, in a way he is not in DAI.

Something has changed, and that something is guilt over unleashing the red lyrium on the world, and probably guilt over killing his own friends.

It's not really focused on as much as it should be, but Varric had plenty of friends amongst both the mages and Templars... Which meant that when Anders blew up the chantry, regardless of which side you picked, Varric was forced to kill people who genuinely mattered to him.

Hence why he's so quick to forgive Blackwall for his lies.

For the most part this generally manifests itself in regards to Red Lyrium, which he blames himself for bringing into the world. I would argue that the more subtle parts you get to see in Banter though, is far, far more interesting and better told than the stuff in the main quest.

Because despite his flaws he "takes all the risks, so the good people won't have to.", just like Varric and Hawke.

This is in large amount what Varric in Inquisition is for the most part all about. Guilt, self loathing, and wanting to be a better person.

He just masks it with his usual wit, charm and charisma.

Kinda like Blackwall, only he doesn't really have much charisma or wit to hide behind. Hence why he is so accepting of, and willing to give him another chance without question.

On a final note before we move on from Blackwall, we also get to see varric try to play matchmaker between Blackwall and Josephine which is cute, but not exactly surprising, or give us further insight into Varric's character.

Cole

Now, I'm not going to cover Cole here, not because the banter isn't interesting, or we don't learn anything, but that's all from the way we learn about the world, or Cole himself.

Varric's side of these banters can be summed up in one sentence, for pretty much every single banter.

Varric is Cole's dad.

Rinse, repeat.

Dorian

Similarily, I will not be covering the banter with dorian, not because it's bad, far from it, it's some of the most entertaining in the game, but it doesn't exactly add much beyond the fact that both Varric and Dorian love to gamble, and share witty banter.

Also nugs has some creepy ass feet. The stuff of nightmares.

The Iron Bull

Far more to be dissected, can be found in Varric's banter with the Iron Bull.

There is so much to learn from this banter, from Spy work to how the Antaam is viewed by the other Qunari and so on, but we'll focus on the stuff relating to varric, as he and bull talk about a lot of things.

Varric: You're not the first Ben-Hassrath I've run across. Hawke and I went on a caper with one named Tallis.

Iron Bull: You don't say.

Varric: She caused us no end of trouble. You wouldn't know her by any chance?

Iron Bull: Hey, one time I ran into this dwarf on the road. Short, grouchy. You think you might know him?

Varric: I'm in the Merchant Guild. Ten royals says I not only know him—he owes me money.

Iron Bull: Oh. Well... no. I don't know Tallis. Sorry.

In stark contrast to his talk with Iron bull, when not involving Anders or other people he hates, Varric loves to talk about people. To the point that in his comeback to Iron Bull, there is an invitation here for Bull to specify who this random dwarf was, because chances are, he actually might know him, and could elaborate on the guy.

Varric: How could you possibly be a spy?

Iron Bull: Well, it's a pretty easy job. I do some fighting, and drinking, and then once in a while I tell Par Vollen about it.

Varric: Heh. Where's the sneaking, the plotting, the subtle machinations?

Iron Bull: If you do that, everyone knows you're a spy. Drinking, fighting, writing notes, that's all it really takes.

Varric: Shit. You're either the worst qunari ever, or the best. I can't decide.

He also showcases great frustration with the way Iron Bull pokes holes in his Bond like spy writing, in favor of the mundane realities of Cloak and Dagger stuff.

Because for all that he prides himself on tall tales, varric does like his writing to somewhat be plausible. Its why he gets pissy at the inquisitor when he tells him how stupid so many parts of DA2 were writing wise, cause Varric wrote it how it happened, and while embelishing it, it was mostly true.

And if his spy writing isn't realistic enough that it might plausibly happen... Then it's not as good as it could be.

Iron Bull: By the way, Varric, you write some nice fight scenes.

Varric: Well, thank you. I'm surprised you think so. They're not exactly realistic.

Iron Bull: I figured that out when the good guy did a backflip while wearing a chain mail shirt.

Varric: And that didn't bother you?

Iron Bull: Back in Seheron, I fell on a guy who tried to stab me in the gut. I felt the blade chip as it went through my gut and hit my back ribs. But I was alive, and on top. I sawed through the armor on the rebel's neck, back and forth, until it went red. I don't need a book to remind me that the world is full of horrible crap.

Varric: Impossible swashbuckling it is.

Meanwhile, this bit is surprisingly layered.

First off, there is Bull's retelling and describing the way he dealt with the Vint while bing impaled as "realistic". If this was not a world with magical healing such as potions or poultices he'd had died from this incident, due to infection if nothing else. That's meant as a bit of meta irony.

But the actual meat of this, is that Varric is just letting Bull rant.

The whole "Backflip while wearing chainmail armor" is something Hawke can literarily do in DA2, Provided you are a rogue Hawke and has high enough stats. If so, when hit by a trap, Hawke will simply backflip out of the way, even if wearing chainmail armor.

It is the kind of shit that for a long was normal for Varric, and he writes it into his fight scenes(Which he has a self dig at calling them not realistic, despite having seen shit like that for himself all the time).

But he doesnt say any of that.

Instead he just lets Bull rant, get it out there how shitty he really feels, because varric knows when to talk, and when to listen, and here is a time to listen.

Varric: So, Bull. You and Dorian?

Iron Bull: Mm-hmm.

Varric: "Two worlds tearing them apart, Tevinter and Qunari, with only love to keep them together."

Dorian: I don't see how this is even remotely your business, Varric.

Iron Bull: Could you make it sound angrier? "Love" is a bit soft.

Dorian: Please stop helping the dwarf.

Varric: How about passion?

Iron Bull: Yes, that's better. Love is all starlight and gentle blushes. Passion leaves your fingers sore from clawing the sheets.

Dorian: You could at least have had the courtesy to use the bedposts.

Iron Bull: Hey, don't top from the bottom.

Varric: Passion it is, then.

Also, i wanna highlight his banter with bull, if he and dorian hook up, and if both are with him in the party. It's really the only bit of Dorian varric banter with real character meat to it, as it puts Dorian's rarely seen tsundere side on full display, and why he makes such a good match with the easy going, yet equally passionate iron bull.

Iron Bull: Hey, Varric, I was reading your stuff... Where do your bad guys come from?

Varric: Well, some of them come from Tevinter and some are Ben-Hassrath spies... but I like the stories where the villain was the man beside you the whole time. The best villains don't see themselves as evil. They're fighting for a good cause, willing to get their hands dirty.

Iron Bull: All right, that's really deep and all, but I meant where do the bad guys come from literally? The way you write it, it's like they just fall from the sky and land on top on the hero.

Varric: I like to leave some things to the reader's imagination.

Also, final bit i'll cover of these two here. It's both a meta hit of writing in that it's supposed to be about solas, but can also apply to Iron bull, and is a self depreciating dig on the single worst gameplay mechanic from DA2.

Sera

So, as with Cole and Dorian, im not covering this sequence of banter as it doesn't really reveal much about Varric as a character. Its generally just Sera trying her usual bullshit, and Varric taking the piss out of her, much to her frustration.

Im not exactly a big fan of Sera, and even here, where most of their dialogue is about Varric basicaly running rings around her, makes me smile.

There is one bit of banter though, that i do want to highlight.

Sera: (sing-song) La la la la la, Sentinals are shits.

Varric: Like it or not, Buttercup, that’s where you come from.

Sera: Says the undwarfiest dwarf ever!

Varric: Fair enough. Paragons can be shits too.

So, this one i feel is extremely important, for the reason that it goes to showcase that 1. Sera doesn't understand Varric in the slightest, and 2. Really goes to showcase Sera's complete and total lack of self awareness, and just how out of touch she is, raiding other people's homes, and calling them shits for defending themselves.

But that second one i'll save for Sera's banter review.

For this one, I want to highlight how Varric, just like Dorian understands and more importantly loves the Culture he originates from. He knows how shitty dwarven culture can be, and will never avoid taking the piss out of it for all it's flaws, but he also admires it. He admires their ability to create marvels, their grit and determination that has seen them take on the Darkspawn for a hundred years and still stand, and the individuals that stood up and above the rest to serve as legends, just like Hawke and the Inquisitor.

There is a reason his hangouts in both games are decorated full of very traditional dwarven furniture. Because he wants to live in a home that looks dwarven.

Because the past is important.

It's a bit of wisdom he tries, and fails to impart to Sera, that you simply trying to pretend your roots don't exists never works. And he's right. Even though Sera never admits wrong on her own part, she fully admits she burnt out on this spiteful hatred in Tresspasser.

Solas

Solas and Varric's banter though, is far, far more interesting.

Both of them are tricksters, both value the past greatly in their own way, both understands the power of a story, both of them lie to the Inquisitor, and both would rather remain the side character than step up to take the spotlight.

And yet they are different. Opposites almost.

One of Varric's defining feature as a person is that he cares about all his friends and how those friendships transcends the chains of status, having become friends with dwarves, Qunari, kossiths, humans, elves, templars, mages, seekers, antivans, fereldens, kirkwallers, orlesians, tevinters, anders, revains, avvar, and so on.

Solas single defining feature is how he sees everyone he does not knows except for his own, very small list of what he considers countrymen, as not things, and is willing to destroy the world for them to prosper.

Varric stays out of the spotlight cause he likes being the power behind the throne. Solas does it because as the Herald's Judas, he doesn't want anyone to question the many, many questions about him further than they have to.

Varric lives in the present, but respects the past. Solas in the past, and is terrified of the present.

Which leads to some of the most interesting banter in the game.

Solas: By the end of Hard in Hightown, almost every character is revealed as a spy or a traitor.

Varric: Wait, you read my book?

Solas: It was in the Inquisition library. Everyone but Donnen turned out to be in disguise. Is that common?

Varric: Are we still talking about books or are you asking if everyone I know is a secret agent?

Solas: Are there many tricksters in dwarven literature?

Varric: A handful, but they're the exception. Mostly they're just honoring the ancestors. It's very dull stuff. Human literature? Now there's where you'll find the tricky, clever, really deceptive types.

Solas: Curious.

Varric: Not really. Dwarves write how they want things to be. Humans write to figure out how things are.

Solas questions Varric about the to him, alien Dwarven liturature, trying to figure out what the new, "lesser" dwarves might write about when no longer part of a hivemind.

Varric gives it to him straight, but there is a deeper bit of character here.

Varric is able to explain this to Solas, because as a man who understands Dwarven culture, strengths, flaws, and weaknesses, and how it ticks, as well as undoubtedly having read a lot of dwarven literature, Varric is able to point out all it's shortcomings, or more accurately the way Human and Dwarven literature trends differentiate due to different cultural values.

Varric: You really spend most of your time in the Fade?

Solas: As much as is possible. The Fade contains a wealth of knowledge for those who know where to look.

Varric: Sure, but I don't know how you dream, let alone wander around in there.

Varric: Especially when the shit that comes out of the Fade generally seems pretty cranky.

Solas: So are humans, but we continue to interact with them... when we must.

Here Varric pries a bit into a topic he(If you took him with you in night terrors) only has experienced once before for himself, from someone who knows more about the fade and the veil than anyone.

Solas ends it on a much darker note than Varric assumes though, as what he means is, we have to tolerate them "for now."

Solas: Is it true that the entire dwarven economy relies upon lyrium?

Varric: Mostly. We've got the nug market cornered as well.

Solas: And the dwarves of Orzammar have never studied lyrium?

Varric: If they have, they certainly haven't shared anything up here. Why?

Solas: It is the source of all magic, save that which mages bring themselves.

Solas: Dwarves alone have the ability to mine it safely. I wondered if they had sought to learn more.

Varric: The folks back in Orzammar don't care much about anything but tradition.

So here we have Varric flat out bullshit Solas in several ways. He knows way more about lyrium than most, having studied red lyrium himself, and yet he does not give that information to Soals, the way he does with the Herald, showing that deep down, Varric trusts you far more than Solas, if not as much as Hawke.

He also knows that both surface and underground Dwarves have deeper knowledge of lyrium than any human, being it's the source of all the enchantments and magic, and that while they might not know it's origins, they understand how it works, and how to use it, transport it, store it, and so on.

If there is one thing Orzammar is good at, and not stuck in tradition, it's exploiting Lyrium to the hilt.

And yet he bullshits Solas about it completely. Because this is an early banter, the likely reason is simply that he does not trust him.

Which given his other important lies is not surprising.

And solas later recognizes this.

Solas: I find the fall of the dwarven lands confusing.

Varric: What's so confusing about endless darkspawn?

Solas: A great deal, although that is a different matter. Dwarves control the flow of lyrium. They could tighten their grip on it.

Varric: It's hard to get the attention of the humans when the darkspawn aren't up here messing with their stuff.

Solas: You're active in the Carta. You know your people could tug the purse strings. You could claim sovereign land on the surface, or demand help restoring the dwarven kingdom, but you don't.

Varric: You're not saying anything I haven't said myself, Chuckles. Orzammar is what it is

Solas Attacks Varric's arguments from adifferent angle here, without directly calling him a liar from the banter before, as he points out just how much power Orzammar has through it's economic might, how even if they know how to use Lyrium so effectively, they haven't been wielding that might to effecrively hammer out an anti Darkspawn coalition to crush the darkspawn in their own dens and wipe them out from the source.

Realistically, the dwarves are rhe only ones who could see it done, and yet they havent. Because before Bhelen, there was never a king willing to upend the entire system to get results.

Varric doesn't actually give his direct thoughts in this bit of banter, but it goes into future ones. Before that though, im gonna quickly cover another bit of banter.

Solas: Do you ever miss life beneath the earth? The call of the Stone?

Varric: Nah. Whatever the Stone - capital S - is, it was gone by the time my parents had me.

Solas: But... do you miss it?

Varric: How could I miss what I never had?

Varric: But say I did have that sense, that connection to the Stone. What would it cost me?

Varric: Would I lose my friends up here? Would I stop telling stories?

Varric: I like who I am. If I want to hear songs, I'll go to the tavern.

Solas: You are wiser than most.

Solas worships the past, to such a degree that he thinks being part of a hivemind under the titans, must have been better for the Dwarves, because of what it allowed them to accomplish by magic, and more importantly that it's what they used to be.

And what they used to be, must be better than what they are now, because the past is better.

Meanwhile Varric is content with the present. He never had stone sense, so why worry about it? Why dream of it, why become his parents? That would be absolutely awful, so why not embrace what you have now.

Though Solas doesn't know it, his backhanded praise here is actually even moreso than he knows.

Its backhanded by intention, because he acknowledges that varric is wiser than those who would wail about their lost glory... But as we'll see in the following banter, he regards all Dwarves, regardless of wheter they are like Varric, as lessers and fools. So varric is better... But he is still a fool.

Meanwhile, on Varric's part, it's even more backhanded than Solas intends because Varric is doing exactly what he's saying he isn't here.

Dreaming of glory days when all was simplier and he was a happier man. He's not dreaming of stone sense itself, but the sentiment is the same.

And he knows it. That's one of the saddest things about Varric in DAI. He became his parents, his worst fear, but he's very much aware of that fact.

Solas: Is there at least a movement to reunite Orzammar and Kal-Sharok?

Varric: What is it with you, Chuckles? Why do you care so much about the dwarves?

Solas: Once, in the Fade, I saw the memory of a man who lived alone on an island. Most of his tribe had fallen to beasts or disease. His wife had died in childbirth. He was the only one left. He could have struck out on his own to find a new land, new people. But he stayed. He spent every day catching fish in a little boat, every night drinking fermented fruit juice and watching the stars.

Varric: I can think of worse lives.

Solas: How can you be happy surrendering, knowing it will all end with you? How can you not fight?

Varric: I suppose it depends on the quality of the fermented fruit juice.

Solas: So it seems.

---

Solas:: I am sorry to have bothered you with my questions about your people Varric. I see so much of this world in dreams. Humans, my own people, even qunari. Dwarves alone were lost to me, save scattered fragments of memory where some spirit cared to watch. Now I know why I see so little.

Varric: And why is that?

Solas:: Dwarves are the severed arm of a once mighty hero, lying in a pool of blood. Undirected. Whatever skill of arms it had, gone forever. Although it might twitch to give the appearance of life, it will never dream.

Varric: I'd avoid mentioning that to any Carta, Chuckles. They might not take it the right way.

---

Varric: What's with you and the doom stuff? Are you always this cheery or is the hole in the sky getting to you?

Solas: I've no idea what you mean.

Varric: All the "fallen empire" crap you go on about. What's so great about empires anyway?

Varric: So we lost the Deep Roads, and Orzammar is too proud to ask for help. So what? We're not Orzammar and we're not our empire.

Varric: There are tens of thousands of us living up here in the sunlight now, and it's not that bad.

Varric: Life goes on. It's just different than it used to be.

Solas: And you have no concept of what that difference cost you.

Varric: I know what it didn't cost me. I'm still here, even after all those thaigs fell.

---

Solas: You truly are content to sit in the sun, never wondering what you could've been, never fighting back.

Varric: Ha, you've got it all wrong, Chuckles. This is fighting back.

Solas: How does passively accepting your fate constitute a fight?

Varric: In that story of yours—-the fisherman watching the stars, dying alone. You thought he gave up, right?

Solas: Yes.

Varric: But he went on living. He lost everyone, but he still got up every morning. He made a life, even if it was alone.

Varric: That's the world. Everything you build, it tears down. Everything you've got, it takes. And it's gone forever.

Varric: The only choices you get are to lie down and die or keep going. He kept going. That's as close to beating the world as anyone gets.

Solas: Well said. Perhaps I was mistaken

This entire banter line is about Varric and Solas.

On solas part it's about his very well spoken and articulated racist opinions on the modern dwarves compared to those who came before and trying to rack his brian around them not going to the lengths he himself would have gone to save their race.

Also the fact they are no longer part of the Titan hivemind. He's really stuck on that for reasons we don't really fully understand.

However, far, far more importantly this is about Varric's entire storyline in DAI.

Varric talks about Orzammar, about the loss of the deep roads, and yet they are all still there, still fighting, still marching on, rather than laying down and dying.

That is the true strength of the Dwarven race.

The ability to keep going even after losing everything. The original dwarves lost the titans and their magic. They marched on.

The dwarven empire lost the deep roads, and all but two thaigs. They marched on.

The surface dwarves lost their caste the last remains of their magic, and their status in dwarven society. They marched on.

Varric lost kirkwall. He lost his entire friend group that was the people who he loved more than any other group of people he has ever know. He lost his home that he grew up in and loved. He lost his parents and he lost Barthrand, the only remaining family he had, and who despite it all deeply, deeply loved. He lost Bianca, a teenage infatuation he never was able to get over.

And he lost Hawke. Either to Anders kickstsrting the war, or to the fade.

He lost everything he loved.

And yet He. Marched. On.

Varric's story in DAI is an understated one, one that isn't really given story focus, but unlike all the rest of the attempts at telling a more subtle story with the companions, this one actually worked.

Varric's story, is about his march onwards.

He lost everything due to Anders actions, and yet here he is. Marching forward through life. He hasn't laid down and died. He's still here. He's still fighting.

He still has hope.

And so he marches on through the twilight of his life, and keeps going, even if he loses Hawke forever... He keeps going, and he makes it through his depression, and grief to make a new life for himself in Kirkwall.

A new Kirkwall, but Kirkwall nonetheless.

Solas: That crossbow is remarkable, Varric. I am surprised the dwarves have not made more of them.

Varric: The woman who made Bianca would rather that not happen. Wars are bloody enough as it is.

Varric: A crossbow that fires this far and this quickly with so little training? Every battle would be a massacre.

Solas: Indeed. I am surprised, not disappointed.

Here we get a lot of insight into Varric... But also a moment of great moral ambiguity.

Everything Varric says here is true... But it would also mean his people finally, finally being able to destroy the darkspawn for good and all. Such a tech advantage would allow them to wipe the blighted Creatures from existence with ease.

Varric is more than brilliant enough to understand this... But he chooses not to think about it, or wheter it's a course of actions, because he is shackled to Bianca even now, even still.

Bianca wants this crossbow not to be on the market, so he doesn't put it on the market, regardless of good or bad.

Varric: Hey Chuckles, do you ever play Wicked Grace?

Solas: I'm not much of a gambler anymore.

Varric: You don't have to play for real coin, that's just for keeping score.

Solas: What do you play for?

Varric: Conversation mostly. That way I win no matter how the cards fall.

This is a followup to Varric's original introductionary short story from way back in the day.

From that one we learn that Varric doesn't actually drink anything served at the Hanged man, he just orders a wine glass or beer mug, because he knows people get nervous if you don't drink in a bar, so he crafts an illusion to aid him in his rogue life.

Vivienne

So like a number of these I'm not gonna cover them in full, as while good, and well written, and paints a very clear picture of Vivienne, they're not exactly deep character pieces for Varrix... But I do wanna cover a few.

Vivienne: Am I to understand, Varric, that you knew the apostate who destroyed Kirkwall's chantry?

Varric: Unfortunately, yes.

Vivienne: What could he possibly have hoped to accomplish with such madness?

Varric: Exactly what he got: a whole lot of innocent people killing each other.

Vivienne: I take it he's no longer on your Wintersend gift list.

Varric: Depends. Does a flaming sack of bronto dung count as a gift?

Vivienne: Only if you tie it with a silk ribbon, my dear.

More Varric hating Anders, and laying all the blame of the Mage Templar Wars and ruining his life on him.

Vivienne: Tell me, Varric, who is the protagonist of this serial?

Varric: You know, we're so far into spoiler territory right now, I think I better stop talking.

Vivienne: Come now, darling. You can tell me.

Varric: Not on your life, Iron Lady. The best way to ensure a book's nevered finish is to tell someone your entire plot.

More Varric showcasing he cannot stand spoilers coming out, and it destroys his entire ability to write.

Vivienne: You know, Varric darling, I read your Hard in Hightown.

Varric: You did? Seriously?

Vivienne: Most of the Imperial Court did. It was in fashion a few winters ago.

Varric: Just how much gold is my publisher stealing from me?

One detail i really like about Varric, is that he tries to create this image of himself as always bring in control and all that... And then he has moments like this where his regular ass publisher swindles him for a shit ton of money.

Vivienne: How many chapters will this book be, Varric dear?

Varric: Well, the first one will come out in twelve chapters.

Vivienne: The first one?

Varric: I've read enough Orlesian fictions to know you never tell a story there in fewer than three complete books. They think you're just warming up after one.

Vivienne: And what happens to the scheming duchess in the first book?

Varric: Are you asking for spoilers, Madame De Fer?

Vivienne: Hints, darling. Not spoilers.

More Varric showcasing he understands other cultures and how they write stories.

[shunshin3]

.

[pandasized-crevice]

KinnPorsche fic ideas!!!

I present some KinnPorsche fic ideas i manically wrote out at 1am

The classic tattoo artist x florist au!!!BUT Porsche is the florist & Kinn is the tattoo artist; bonus fun if Kinn is the one who actually tattoos Porsche’s phoenix tattoo!!!OH AND Porsche at first gives Kinn flower bouquets that mean fuck you(yall know that post about flower language and the fuck you bouquet right?) but as time goes on the meaning of the bouquets change…..

MR. & MRS. SMITH AU  Y A LL

WING AU love me a wing au!!! KP grooming each others wings even though thats only for close family & loved ones???HELL YEAH

KP met when they were younger but due to circumstances they lost touch BUT MEET AGAIN AT YOKS BAR AHAHA ft. symbolic matching necklaces they gave each other so its basically the spider-man meme when they clock it on each other

Yall know that reddit post where the dude thinks he’s homophobic but he’s actually in love with his roommate? Porsche & Kinn come ON

Porsche works at this fancy restaurant bar where mafia boss Kinn goes for business meetings, porsche stops kinn from getting poisoned(drug in drink me thinks) and kinn(who already had a crush on the hot charming bartender who serves him the best drinks) falls harder

Porsche somehow ends up working for Vegas instead of Kinn and now Kinn must sit in lust every time the families meet because why is his cousin's bodyguard so hot?

Porsche meets Tankhun first & they become besties; porsche is giving my best friends brother by miss victoria justice

Magic mike-esque dancer!Porsche & mafia boss king!Kinn

Gardner/lawn worker!Porsche ft. Kinn staring lustfully from the windows & Kinn sitting by the pool to “read” aka to watch a shirtless porsche cut the grass

Porsche saves Kim and becomes his bodyguard instead; basically porsche becomes the watson to our kimlock holmes

University au! How could I forget!! Yall know those hazing things they do in bl? the specific activities they do?can yall imagine Porsche having to do the chicken dance to get kinn to sign his little book?

Mermaid au mermaid au MERMAID AU MY BELOVED so many possibilities with a mermaid au!!!!!!!!!

Maleficent-esque au with porsche as maleficent and porchay as aurora: porsche's uncle betrays porsche & cuts off his wings to give to the king(the king being vegas dad), porsche is like fuck yall fr & puts up the thorn wall to keep not only his brother but all the magical folk safe. But guess what little shithead mamages to get in?(tis prince kim!){the second & main fams are different kingdoms} Kinn goes looking for him,KP met,and idk plot happens...

Mamma mia au porchay invites porsche ex’s:kinn,vegas,pete to his birthday party

Zombie apocalypse au KP are separated and have to find each other again/ are strangers who join forces to stay alive & fall in love in the process

CORPSE BRIDE-ESQUE AU!!!!!Kinn as Emily(killed by his ex tawan ofc), Porsche as victor. Porsche is engaged to slimeball Vegas cuz his uncle owes them & he uses porsche to pay the debt. While in the forest Porsche rants about how he doesn’t wanna marry Vegas,he gets sad(he wants to marry for love),recites the vows his parents had for each other and places a ring on a “tree branch”. TIS KINN YUH hence Kinn taking porsche. {Spoiler alert: the rest of the theerpakyal fam is dead,vegas and his father killed them once kinn was killed}

All the theerapanyakul siblings have tigers (don’t question why they just do) and Kinns tiger adores Porsche to the point of physically harming Kinn/others if they do anything to Porsche. Not to mention,after they get over the incident of Porsche stepping on their tails and bonking them on the heads(he was scared guys you’d be to if you saw 2 fucking tigers outta no where),Tankhuns tigers,elizabeth & sebastian of course, like porsche too so most of the time you’ll see Porsche walk by with his trio of kitties

When Tankhun is kidnapped he manages to get away but passes out due to his injuries (amnesia anyone?)Our lovely parchara kittisawasd brothers find him and are like “neat a new brother!” but seriously tankhun gets the love he deserves 

If anyone wants to use any of these please go for it, i beg of you. if a fic is birthed PLEASE tag me i'd love to see it👀

[littlelioncub43]

Our nerds meeting our parents/us meeting their parents! <3

Jake would be low-key nervous about meeting your parents, i mean after all he wants them to like him. At first he'd make some awkward jokes but he's also smooth so i feel like it'd still go well somehow 😂/ meeting his parents, he'd be so excited to introduce you to them! (Because he has a niece he probably has a sibling so he'd also be excited to introduce you to them) and you're great to ofc they'd love you💋💋

Dennis would be so excited to meet your parents bc he knows that he's gonna marry you one day so he'd want your parents to like their future son-in-law<3 / meeting his parents, he'd be so proud. His parents didn't really approve of his first marriage and we're a bit skeptical of meeting you, fearing Dennis may have chosen someone bad for him, hey after all they just want the best for him! And you are, you are the best for him! It's so clear even their dog (idk i just imagine them having a dog😂) who doesn't usually like new people like you and senses how much Dennis loves you <333 and they are just happy Dennis found someone that loves him the same ❤️

I honestly didn't know what to say for Justin since canonically his dad is in prison i think?😂 And if i remember correctly his family is a bit weird so idk

Nonnie, honey, you never miiiiiiiiiiiiss! 🥺

I totally think that Dennis' parents are lowkey done with him, but not completely or in a very obvious way. They're worried about him like you said, since they didn't like his first marriage. They're cautious about you since that first one was nice at first too. But after tbey realize that you truly do love Dennis they warm up to you 😄

Oofta, baby Justin has no one to introduce to you. So he is really scared and nervous to meet your family, he just wants them to like him. That's all he wants, a family that loves him. He's kind and respectful but shy like never before. He mamages to make a good impression, but you just know that he's going to be asking you "do you think they like me?" a million times. 🥺🤧