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#didnt observe them all the time
hecksupremechips · 6 months
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Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩
#the klock keeps ticking#yttd#i wanna replay yttd so bad but i also like Gotta play other stuff with the time i have akskks#but yeah the brainrot this specific character has given me idk if I ever really talked about it but it was BAD#i like obsessively played the game in like 3 days and it was not a good idea lol but just like shin#i had to take like a week to recover from this guy cuz i couldnt stop thinking about him and how hes just like me fr#first off just the very inconsistent personality hes got going on that is very me he has these different personalities he wears to cope with#all the traumatic shit happening hes both so helpless its comical and so manipulative its terrifying#and idk its really interesting how like good and bad he is at being manipulative like hes very smart and can analyze weaknesses and lie so#good not even he knows the truth but hes also grasping at straws he doesnt think things through at all#like the second main game he just didnt prepare at all hes fumbling his way through everything its going so bad#he just wants to go home he wants to outdo the game makers but hes being used by them so bad he wants it to STOP#and its just the way that like. it hits so hard cuz you know hes really not a bad person not at all he doesnt want any of this hes just#being horribly manipulated and doing whatever he can to survive but its also really scary how#well hes able to lie and manipulate and claw his way through but hes also weaker than a grade schooler#and you never forget that either and as much as he cheated his way through he still failed it was all just a cheap trick in the end#and all of this hits very hard like his personality is eerily similar to mine and just the way he thinks and acts#cuz im the same like im weak and a dweeb who likes funny cats but im also emotionally detached and observant and selfish#but where it hits the hardest is his relationship with midori like oooof that one was too real just like#the first person who was ever his friend was horribly abusive and treated him like a child and didnt respect any boundaries#and he just got sick pleasure out of seeing shin be upset and he was like. a groomer#and shin was fucking relieved when he died but also kept his scarf and adopted his personality to survive#and still goes by sou after ch2 and the scene that gets me the most is when shin ai is asked about his relationship with midori#and you can just SEE how horrified shin is because his deepest shame his abuse is being shared to everyone without his consent#and hes reliving it all in that moment and literally seeing who he used to be experiencing the abuse#he just curls into himself and like covers his ears and pulls his hair thats literally what i do AAAAAA#im just so grateful for the direction they took this character kokichi ouma wishes he was shin tsukimi so bad#and yeah just like damn. its scary how similar i am to shin like damn i really am going through it huh oof#I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I WILL DEFEND HIM WITH MY LIFE HE DID ALL OF THAT STUFF YOUR HONOR BUT LISTENNNN#have you considered that hes cute and smart and weird and maybe just needs friends who arent assholes
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doctorwhoisadhd · 5 months
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i was in a high school during school hours for the first time since i started dyeing my hair and the number of compliments i got was crazy
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scarletiswailing347 · 6 months
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thought of some really cool backstory for killer!zam for the dbl au but i Cannot tell if it clashes with the canon lore or not cause i havent looked into it enough yet
#mine.txt#c zam#au dbl#f ls#basiaclly survivor!zam got banished to the void after 6 months cause he just kept on dying#and it eventually made his mind just shut down and start dissociating#which the entity didnt like cause that meant he wasnt feeling things anymore#and eventually he turned into a haunt cause i assume survivors that got voided turn into haunts eventually??? idk it doesnt really say#and the void in the blight's lore cinematic doesnt really look like the one in the event#while the one in the observer's cinematic doesnt really point to much#and during halloween or whenever it canonically takes place during a rift opening event spoke managed to release him#which made him remember everything that happened to him in the trials and yanked him out of his dissociated state#which stirred some Extremely Strong and Extremely Homicidal feelings#which made the void go hmmm maybe i still have some use for this guy after all and brought him back from the void#but since hes a haunt he needs a lot of auric cells to reconstruct#which isnt a problem for the entity but its still way more than the average killer needs#idk what the logic of the visceral cankers and pustula flowers are since i cant really find anything other than they bloom during halloween#so i headcanon they appear in areas with a larger concentration of auric cells#and normally auric cells are too spread out to spawn them#hence why they only really show up in halloween since more consciential energy is built up in the entity since emotions are running high#(i mean all kinds of emotions not just despair cause just despair would be the void)#and since zam is essentially a walking talking auric concentration hes got them blooming all over him#i also headcanon the realms run on amok time so both survivor!zam and killer!zam are just running around at the same time#theyve got an isolated timeloop thing going on where survivor!zam keeps dying and turning into killer!zam#while killer!zam keeps running on heightened emotions until the toll of killing himself over and over again gets to him and he gets voided#at least until mapicc has had enough and decides to teach zam to be better at surviving#as opposed to leo and clowns method where they just kinda try (and fail) to shield him#so survivor!zam is more visibly traumatized now but can at least hold off his own#killer!zam meanwhile doesnt get fatigued from killing himself over and over again and doesnt get voided#the entity allows this cause it inflicts significant emotions in the survivors lol
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pistolslinger · 2 years
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timeisacephalopod · 1 year
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Everyone who read my message to my sister said I was harsh but I personally have read that thing like 50 times and the meanest thing I said was that she's been having kids with loser guys who cause her nothing but pain and suffering since she was 18 years old and how many more kids are going to be brought into the world this way? That's all TRUE it's not MY fault, and I don't think it's harsh to point out the truth I was WAY meaner about it to everyone else lmao. Hell I've posted meaner comments on here than I'd actually say TO her, my message was fairly short and I wanted to get to the crux of the issue- which is that she's in her 30's literally acting the SAME way she did as a teen that's not harsh that's me describing her behavior lmao.
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aquarri · 2 years
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#anon#there are very few people i truly hate on the earth and louis is not one of them#really my 'hate' for him comes from a place of love and the want for them to do better#because they deserve better! and they can achieve that#yeah recently i've been hating on him and have been 'unsupportive' but thats how i deal with people who are in my eyes being stupid#making poor decisions#its very hard for me to see something and brush it under the rug#(not supporting the doc bc i dont want a doc that isn't truly authentic or made without the public lies)#im not someone whos gonna sit back and laugh when i see something i dont like ya know?#(please dont call me a solo harrie bc i think you missed my hating harry holivia era :D that was a shit show and harry was acting stupid#and i said that and didnt support that either lol)#not that i need to justify anything but i complain about hshq and tour all the time#im not gonna hate on harry bc hes not pissing me off rn? lol#its tough love sorry anon ik my worth and what i deserve to give to people based on what they give back#is that parasocial? idk but i also dont need to blindly follow and act happy when im not?#also i hate the word “stan” im just here observing the drama talking on my little blog about millionaire men that annoy me sometimes#i really do want better for them thats why im here at least thats what brought me here#i do like louis or at least i liked what he stood for in previous years but idk both of them seem to be kind of lost at the moment#this just turned into a ramble but anon im not a solo harrie nor will i ever be#i would like to be called a hater larrie.#why would i be directing hater energy at harry when he just sang woman after louis did ~that~#im not gonna praise him for stunting with a 22 y/o playing daddy and releasing a copy lg doc lmao
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I don't believe anyone is actually mistyped providing they are using the enneagram and cognitive functions the correct way, which is to observe Movements in their psyche.
If you're identifying with a type because you fit a static image that people have put forth for that enneatype, but you never actually observe any of that type's movements in yourself, then yeah, you can call yourself "mistyped".
#I mistyped as 9 because I wasn't observing any actual 9 -> 6 or 9 -> 3#I was relating to Chestnut's static description of 9s but not observing any actual movement#I was vaguely observing 9 -> 3#nowadays I can see the 9 in me properly and its there for sure but not as strong as I thought it was#I mistyped as 4 because I was emo and depressed. never observed a single movement there til I started arting recently#Never mistyped as 6 because I was like... er... it is absurd that I'm disintegrating into 3. im open minded to it but can never see 6 -> 3#tho I always knew my head fix was definitely 6#never mistyped as 5 because I didnt understand it#just knew I was a lot like a 5#but when I told ppl I was a 5 they laughed at me#and I was like yeah true I relate to 6 more anyway#but no matter how much I related to 6 as a static type I always Knew I was a 5 when stressed... the movement was so strong.#and it came out when I was stressed like all the time#mistyped as 7 for a bit because people told me to be a 7w6 when I first discovered ennea. so I was like sure#I missed my 2 fix until my friend called it out. then I realized oof youre right. I can observe 2 movement in me#but I disintegrate to 5 more than 8#and I just neglected 8 altogether because of all the drama people made about 8 on the internet. I was like#I'm not looking here. Not touching this. the drama isnt worth it plus its like I dont wanna confront these patterns in myself too#the internet is full of all these psycho 1s who wanna be 8s and they prevent anyone from deeply exploring what 8 means#due to a combination of envying real 8s (their 1 -> 4 makes them nuts like that) and loathing / fearing real 8-ness#since it is their opposing force#I loathe and fear real 1-ness#that's for sure#its a hell of a lot for me to go into the headspace of a 1 and write posts on 1#but also therapeutic#the static images of types are needed to help us know whats going on... these are the Conscious... the exploration of the movement#is the Subconscious Mystery#1 is the conscious and 8 is the unconscious#125 = conscious... 478 = unconscious#many have described it this way
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avallands-basement · 2 days
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look i love making sae be the one who's so in love and showering hajun with so much love and affection but it's much more fun to think that HE fell harder than her
#it's the she fell first he fell harder thing. gooodd hjs have such common dynamic the frustrating and infuriating type#like look at first she have a crush on him right but as a model. that girl is literally a moth she gets attracted by those with light#though at first she admires him as a model and knew him through toma- her kamioshi. though i think... she just starts admiring him a lot?#she literally went through a 'highschool crush' phase but late since she was like. at college 😭#observed him... wow he's a lot similar to her than she thought. that guy puts up a smile in front of strangers and keep people at a distanc#he looked... strangely alone. why? even though he have friends too. she saw herself in hajun and... didnt want to be like him#will she keep putting up a face too? will she keep lying to herself? and would that make her alone in the end as well? she didnt want that.#so shes like yknow what? let's be shameless. her friends had been so loving of her unconditionally.#she thought that they'll leave after highschool and yet... and yet they stayed. they keep approaching her.#and come to think of it... they're always the ones giving effort for her right? when it comes to planning for hang outs-#they're always the one to reach out. never her. shouldnt she return the favor then? love them as much as they love her#pour all her heart out. she used to do it- she can do it again. love people unconditionally without expecting anything from them.#surely this time it'd be different. surely it wont drain her. even if there's a chance they'll leave her- it doesnt matter now.#she knows she gave her everything and that's enough for her. maybe she'll feel better if she had realized this when she was a child...#but that's okay now! so for now! lesson learned: dont be hajun#but also sae. just have a different view of hajun in her head 😭??? like she admits she didnt really know hajun before but actually meeting#him must be so complicated for her lol like this guy used to be her crush! and she got to talk to him but holy shit he's lowkey an asshole😭#not even lowkey but he really is a bitch lmfaaooo so like. damn 'i forgot i used to have a crush on this guy like i used to like him???'#'in what way??? (his looks dont even deny it sweetie)' i think her crush on him in the past made her more snappy towards him now lmfao#like 'gooooddd i used to have a crush on THIS GUY??? that's making me piiisseedd' LMAAAOOO 😭😭#i genuinely have NOOOOO idea how they started having this dynamic but it's just. them lowkey insulting each other? not really INSULT insult#but rather bickering masked by politeness? like 💢^^) (^^💢 selfish ohime-sama vs black hearted prince#but the one who's usually losing here would be sae ngl and hajun's mostly the one being playful tho tbf they CAN calmly talk to each other#sometimes they just become competitive? sae herself is a competitive one at first it would be 'oho~ let's see how long he can keep this up~#to 'give up already!!!! my social battery isn't gonna last long!!!!!!!!' and hajun's just watching her lose it every time 😭😭#ah.... my absolutely pathetic daughter im so sorry..... when it comes to him she gets unreasonably annoyed. just who does he think he is?#and yet she can't even feel arrogant around him. she knows bae are on a different league than her. that's why despite being very friendly a#expressing her admiration towards them she still puts up a barrier around them? it's not that deep she have her own close friends#yumeshipping — hajusae [prri]
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mayordeas-clone · 29 days
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whenever im looking for USTs for song covers i wanna do quick i've come to find three types
has all the words in the right places, untuned blank slate that (imo) did all the hard stuff for you and now you get to have fun tuning it yourself
an intricately tuned file that's pretty much plug-and-play (unless i feel like modifying it to be in english)
the most inexplicable and user-unfriendly setup ever that modifying it to be singable for your voicebank and language is a challenge to do on its own
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midwinterwings · 2 months
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IW and EW is confusing
so...this isnt even remotely surprising but I'm surprised Pikachu abt it, its surprising to me.
When i initially fronted i assumed I'd act similar to in IW but that literally didn't happen. I dont recall I like writing and drawing in IW but I feel the urge to here...and I'm much cooler headed in EW.
The whiplash makes me go ":0" it's so...weird. especially since I'm still 100 percent me, but I act completely different in EW. Well at the same time the front has some...baggage left of the people who used to be here. Theyre gone. Dunno where they are.
One is something that makes me unable to talk, administered by no one, its just like a cage imposed on my mouth that snaps closed and makes me unable to use my windpipes.
Two is a person left behind made by the old host who's become his own independent being and keeps fronting, shoving me aside and bursting into the body in certain situations. Admittedly, they do a better job than me but it's still violating as I have no choice except to be an observer.
Three...the fact I'm...even thinking so much, is...uncharacteristic. Well, I wasn't exactly devoid of braincells back in IW, but like...I definetly didnt think as much. Especially about plurality. It's unnerving to realize I'm one person and there's others as well who may front in future. Because i feel like one guy if no one else is around, but I know it's not true because I can access memories of the previous fronters and they thought they were the only one too. I can't really talk to the other people. I know I'm technically an alter formed due to trauma of the EW body and past but I only know this from the information base and...thing is, my life is completely different to the EW's and especially since the person who was around during the early years of the External body's life, has gone or died or something. He's just not here so me and the others who aren't fronting are just left with...ourselves, since the fact we exist is coz of that trauma that none of us acrually experienced. Oh, and the memories left behind and stored. So I do have the memories to look into but thats it.
Im not really...conscious of the fact I was formed from EW body's trauma. I get it conceptually but not actually. Coz, you see, I got a whole world I belong in, relationships, a past. I straight up identify 0% of me with the External world body's experience and past...to me the trauma was just kinda the conduit of how I am created but its not important to me at all.
There is some things that jar me. Namely my current fixation on plurality since like...I...wait nvm.
Its coz I'm not a facet I'm a whole person. I dont feel like part of a whole. I'm my own individual. And I'm aware of others coz they appear and because I can access memories in the info base, not very well but enough. And I also get mega pissed off if the same stuff that was the reason the system was a system and not a singlet happens again to me, and I feel kind of...an ancient kind of rage. One I as a singular person didn't create, more of the rage and disappointment left over by one of the people who was in the system long ago. In those moments I see the memories of that person as 'mine', usually I don't do that. I can see memories from former fronters but as a spectator although it's first person.
I guess the rage caused by the same triggers that created the external body's early trauma is deeply rooted in all of us, whoever fronts or is 'conscious' and not doing their own thing in innerworld.
The confusing thing is when that happens I kind of revert to singlet mode and kind of...embody the old alter naturally, the one who pretended to be the only one, basically rping as a singlet and adding all external world events and treating them as 'their experiences' and trying to be 'normal' I, on my own, don't identify with a lot of stuff EW body went through. Purely because it literally didn't happen to me in a Literal sense, and that's coz I was only fully formed a few days ago. So it couldn't happen to me. That being said I do feel what the old alter/s felt so it's kinda like being there but I wasn't actually there, still, I do feel their emotions from that trauma strongly at times and from an outside standpoint you couldn't tell the stuff didnt happen to ME, in a Literal sense.
so what am I getting at here. Its that it's pokemon gasp, kind of a surprise and shock fronting after the old fronter was aware of me existing (they thought I was a character they created)
because stuff is just...totally different from what I'm used to. I act different too and like different things. Then again it's not completely true because the things i do in EW are similar to a lot of stuff I did in IW as a young kid, but its been long since I've been that kid, I barely even remember I was him most of the time due to shit that happened in IW. I guess, doing something I used to do as a young kid and feeling a sense of whiplash and discomfort is actually very simular to if it was in IW and my entire point isn't valid.
-> so in fact jts more...on the surface I act different in EW than IW but acrually I do the same things just in a different context and stuff.
-T
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snekdood · 8 months
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i think some ppl dont understand the difference between being full on consciously bigoted + going out of your way to harass a minority and someone who heard phrases from their friends and family while not actually holding any ill will towards whichever minority
#i was both best friends with a black girl in middle school and also had my sister showing me racist videos and stereotypes#did it make me say things that i totally shouldnt have and didnt know i shouldnt say? for fucking sure- regardless i still never personally#saw her as bad or less than or anything at all. it probably helped that my childhood friend was filipino bc i was already exposed to#different people. its like the whole words vs actions thing. ppl would say words to me and i would parrot them thinking i was being#funny like my brother or sister but ultimately i never saw anyone as different than me and never really treated anyone differently either#i was a child who didnt understand the weight or meaning of things i parroted and trusted those around me to know better#since i was literally a fuckin' child. thats kinda what they do. and no one ever really countered me if i did something wrong?#there was one time in like 2nd grade where i had just come from a really christiany catholicy school to a different better cooler school#that was less oppressive and DIDNT require me to participate in church shit and wear a uniform-#and i was still not very exposed to black people at that time yet#so when i was in second grade there was a black kid (different person from my friend in middle school) and we were sitting at a table#and i was just kinda making an observation like 'you're black!' not a negative thing just like 'oh! i understand what this is! i know what#this is ive heard of ppl like this before and maybe met one or two black ppl previously!' lmao and then i followed it up with 'like martin#luther king!' bc he was probably one of the only black ppl i knew about and i literally learned about him when i visited the school for#the first time to try it out in first grade and then apparently everyone thought i was being super offensive??????????????????#??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????#i dont really remember the details and my gma remembers an entirely different thing so idek whats the truth but thats how i remember it#going down. i wasnt trying to be rude or offensive i was just like 'oh you're this! like this person ive heard of! neat :)!' and apparently#it got interpreted as a really bad thing that i said and idk. that was probably one of the weirder experiences i had growing up#like maybe its not always fun to be known for the minority you are bc of a famous person whos of the same minority...?? idk#i still to this day dont know what i said wrong really. i just wasnt exposed to very many black ppl#i knew of like one black girl once at a gymnastics thing i did sometimes and we were friends and i was a tiny tiny child all of this#happening way before 2nd grade and all i remember is her dad and my dad talking and me going to her fancy house to swim in her pool#once. and then i stopped doing gymnastics for whatever reason. so i wasnt exactly super exposed to black ppl frequently.#esp since the christianty-catholicy school was full of rich white kids. and so was my neighborhood at the time.#so i wasnt trying to be mean or offensive to this guy in 2nd grade but it got interpreted that way and then everyone treated me different#bc ig they thought i was a certain way bc the teachers were overreacting a bit. i have no idea. i really just think that one white#girl just liked to bully me and didnt actually have a good reason why and im tired of trying to humor ppl thinking its bc i was a bigot 😒#like i wouldnt be surprisedif nowadays that how she tries to justify it but NONE of what she ever did was calling me out or anything#it was ALLLLL treating me different for being 'weird' in her eyes. but i digress.
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aayakashii · 3 months
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soooo I wrote this for the art god @devotion-disorder because
1- they're one of my favorite artists ever!!!!!!! And they're someone who portrays yanderes in such a 😙🤌 chef's kiss way that I can't help but admire
2- I am obsessed with their oc kuuya
but if you'd rather I delete it, just let me know!!
Warnings: NSFW, yandere behavior, unhealthy obsession !!! Minors DNI !!!
Part 2 of this fic here <3
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The skin on the nape of your neck prickled, making you shiver at the strange sensation.
The steady gaze outside your window was so piercing and unmoving that it could be as sharp as needles nicking your skin.
Although, if you were to be fully honest, it felt more like a knife.
It would be just another night, if it wasn't for the fact that your co-worker lurked outside your house.
"Kuuya", you mouthed his name, just to feel how it moves against your lips, because you could never really say it during daytime without having him spiral headfirst into a meltdown.
Kuuya was a disaster.
He never talked to you.
You would sometimes catch him staring at you during work, which made him blush like an anime schoolgirl, but that was the extent of his interaction with you.
He was a regular employee, didn't stand out much, nor caused problems. He was just... there. Constantly looking exhausted, with his back hunched and in the verge of a mental breakdown.
And you were so attracted to that mess of a man.
Your friends would probably frown and sigh if they knew, but they were also pretty much aware of your type: sickly victorian-looking men, anemic, with extremely dark circles under their eyes, who probably sneeze a lot and shake like chihuahuas.
And, hey, that was Kuuya to a T. How could you not have a crush on him?
You soon realized, however, that he probably had a few screws loose.
It started slow, a few things going missing. First it was a pen, then some of your hair ties, then old post-it notes you had forgotten about, until their absence reminded you of their existence.
These things were inconsequential.
You wouldn't even notice their disappearance, if it wasnt for the fact that one day you saw Kuuya with a fluffy hair tie that looked way too similar to yours to be a coincidence. It even had the same little star charm that yours had.
And then you noticed the pens, carefully placed inside a cup near his computer.
And the erasers, the post-its, the pencils, all the other office appliances that you were pretty sure were yours.
But they weren't, right?
That was just your fertile imagination playing tricks on you.
Right?
One day, just to erase this silly idea from your head – I mean, you were probably just paranoid – you waited until you saw Kuuya take a break from his assignments and make his way to the bathroom.
You observed through the corner of your eyes how he stared at you while making his way to the other side of the office, anxiously shaking your leg as you mentally egged him to hurry up and go to the damn toilet.
As soon as you were sure he was inside and you were out his sight, you bolted towards his desk, earning a few pissed off glances from your other coworkers.
You had to work quickly though, since you didnt know how long he would take to come back. Looking over your shoulder constantly, you opened the drawers under his desk, searching for something and feeling silly all the while (what if you're the crazy paranoic one for real?), until your hands haphazardly touched some papers and you heard the sound of crinkles.
Looking over your shoulder one more time to make sure he wasn't around, you lifted the papers and mouthed a silent "oh." as you saw what was underneath them.
Dozens and dozens of candy wrappers, discarded notes and even more of those old post-its laid organized in what you could say was impeccable fashion, if it wasnt for the fact that it was all trash.
Your trash.
In the back, you saw some plastic bags with questionable contents, but your anxiety was in an all time high and you decided to just put things back were they were and close the drawer.
You had your confirmation. He WAS crazy and you were still paranoid, but at least you were right.
You made way back to your desk and sighed, sitting down.
Conflicted feelings pooled in your gut.
You knew all of that meant that he was indeed crazy and obsessed and potentially dangerous, but also... you couldn't really deny the excitement that made butterflies fly all around in your stomach and the giddy feeling that made your heart race with expectations – of what, you didn't know.
And as these feeling swarmed you, you failed to realize the pair of eyes that were locked tight onto your figure from the very start.
If Kuuya could properly express his feelings, he would be moaning and whining in pure despair.
They saw everything. They saw where he keeps all his treasures he had been collecting for the past months.
But why?! Why did they even think about looking for that? Has Kuuya been acting too obvious? But he made sure he wouldn't be too creepy! Well, at least not as creepy as he truly wanted to be. How was that happening all of a sudden?!
The taste of copper interrupted his mental breakdown and he looked down at his thumb, where tiny droplets of blood appeared after he anxiously chewed it.
"It's okay, it's fine" he kept repeating in his mind, like a mantra. He'd just need to see how you'd act around him after that.
If you stopped interacting with him (even if most of those interactions were just good mornings and good evenings coming from YOU), he would probably just... end it all for once. Or maybe kidnap you so you wouldn't run away. Whatever crossed his mind first.
With his heart beating loud on his chest, Kuuya walked back to his seat and forced himself to work, spreadsheets and numbers flashing on his mind, unnoticed.
All he could think was of your hands rummaging through his drawers.
Oh god, your hands touched his things.
Kuuya exhaled sharply, rubbing his thighs together to alleviate the sudden discomfort in his groin. What would he do if you never even looked at his direction again? Sure, you could even report him to the HR, but not being able to see you was a fate worse than being fired!
His mind tumbled, wandering through every worst scenario possible, and in his despair, he didn't notice it was already time to clock out.
"Good evening, Kuuya." You say as you pass by him, nodding your head, with a tight smile.
'Huh?'
Kuuya stares at nothing in front of him, until the fact that you talked to him registers in his mind.
'HUH?'
You talked to him?
Wait.
Did you really see what was in his drawers? Was he just hallucinating? No, there's no way he was. He saw how your colleagues stared at you when you ran to his table. They SAW you. Just like he did. So you saw everything. And you don't hate him? What the fuck. You don't find him disgusting? What? What the hell.
He didn't understand.
He couldn't understand.
He had to understand.
And so, he led himself towards your house, hiding in the bushes right in front of your bedroom window.
How lucky was he that you didn't live in an apartment building?
He was there to understand you better. Just for that. And it'd be just this time, he swore. Just to see what was up with you.
His breath was ragged and heavy and his cheeks burned red. He bit his bottom lip tightly to keep any moan from escaping as he palmed himself through his pants, while he watched the way you stripped yourself of your work clothes.
Quickly undoing his belt buckle and his pants, he let himself be completely overtaken by pure lust and began pumping his dick mercilessly as he was graced with just a little bit more of your skin, right in front of him.
He saw you sigh as you got rid of your pants and his eyes rolled back, imagining how you'd sound if he was the one taking your clothes off.
Oh, what would he give to be able to jump through your window and grab one of your dirty clothes and get drunk on your scent...
The thought made him buck his hips forward clumsily, and he gritted his teeth, hard.
Well, fuck.
He panted, while he observed the way his cum dripped from the leaves of the bush, and as coherent thoughts started flowing back to his mind, he suddenly hoped he wasn't moving too much to catch your attention.
You hadn't even looked his way, so he was safe, right?
Right?
You rubbed your thighs together as you kept your back turned to the window. The windowpane was open, in order to allow the wind to flow through your bedroom, and due to this little fact, you could hear a faint sound coming from the plants right in front of your window.
A quiet, almost indiscernible (if you weren't paying close attention) plap plap plap sound.
You bit your lip to keep your grin from spreading through your lips.
The dumbass was masturbating! Right there! Right in front of your room!
You sighed, feeling the heat pool in between your legs, but controlled your instinct to pull him out from wherever he was and fuck him silly in your bedroom.
You desired him so fucking much. You thrived in his attention, like a sunflower leaning towards rays of light.
The thing is: while you loved his obsession, you were also deathly afraid that he would lose interest in you as soon as he found out how much you also wanted him.
Much like a cat who discards a prey. Except this cat was wet, sad, pathetic and still, you were ridiculously eager to keep playing dead so he would put his grimy, sticky little paws on you just a little bit more.
How would Kuuya feel, you wondered, if he knew you were as obsessed with him as much as he was with you?
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springcatalyst · 1 year
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gettin called out about characters Again
#my roommate was like 'do why. why do u like daryl so much.'#and i was like 'what do u mean'#and they go 'u know the type of character u usually like is different and then theres daryl'#which of course meant i had to ask What my type of character was#and they said you know. theyre all stoic and observant and a little scary#and like ohohooho but you know what the real treat is. daryl IS all of those things#well. stoic is not a word i woukd use for him. and also i didnt say any if this cause idk how to without sounding insane#and also i know they dont REALLY care about my fucking guys from my show and the way im insane about them#but like NO u dont understand hes all of those things. hes SO observant he is so watchful of the people around him#either because he is looking for danger or because he is watching out for the people he loves#he isnt STOIC per say but he is a certain amount of detached or numb or broken in a way that looks much of the same#he is capable of violence and he is capable of BEARING violence in a way that makes him a lil scary at times#GOD. im thinkin about daryl now. you dont understand hes everything to me. hes so. he is so#hes so broken and hes so sweet and he cares so much and he feels So Much and he doesnt know what to do with any of it#hes so lost. hes so lonely. hes so damaged but through everything he fiNDS A FAMILY THAT LOVES HIM AND THAT HE LOVES#shut the hell. im so normal about him. my perfect fucked up little man who i want to torture indescribably. for funsies or whatever#h
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hikarry · 9 months
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I'm not really on the team that swears to Jesus and beyond that Crowley lost his memories after the Fall. Yes, of course, he forgot some stuff because, ya know, he has been alive for more than 6000 years and if I don't remember what I ate for lunch yesterday, Satan knows he won't remember every single second of his life, but he remembers the important things
"Ah, but what about him not remembering fighting alongside FurFur or building the thingy with Saraqael?"
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Love, I give you two options:
Those are either some of the stuff he didn't consider important enough to remember OR he is just straight up fucking with them. He does remember, but why reveal it if playing dumb sometimes is good in the long run? Might be useful
Alas, I don't know, but I will die on the hill that he does remember
Which means he most probably remembers meeting Aziraphale. Not because Aziraphale was "important" at the time per se, or because it was love at first sight (because it wasnt, not for him. Bro was so focused on the nebula he didnt even introduce himself when Aziraphale did. He threw him a "Right. Nice to meet ya. Anyway, nebula time!"), but because he was there when Crowley created the nebula and, as he said, he had been waiting for that moment since "well, always". It's an important moment for him, so he remembers. Aziraphale just so happened to be present
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I don't know if that was the only interaction they had in Heaven or not (and that's not the point I'm trying to get to so I will ignore that problem for a later post, maybe), but when the now Demon Crawley was sent up to the Garden, he did remember Aziraphale. That's why he approached him
Cmon, Crowley isn't stupid. Of course he wouldn't approach an angel on the wall just willy nilly and make conversation. He didn't know Aziraphale had given away the flaming sword yet. Just approaching an angel from behind and morph into a demon next to him out of nowhere could be a death sentence. Or at least an A Line for a good smitting
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Yet, he did it. He had at least 3 other angels to choose from but he approached the angel that he remembered from back in the beginning that was kind enough to help him with the engine of the nebula. Hell! I even bet this was not the first time they saw each other in the Garden!
Bet they've seen and observed each other from afar a few times while they interacted with the humans (yes, cause I believe Crawley, before tempting Eve, tried to gain her trust. It's easier to listen to a friend than a random snake) or just around the Garden really.
That's why Aziraphale didn't get surprised when Crawley showed up at the wall, because he knew the demon snake had been around the Garden for a while. He probably even recognized him as the former Star Maker and hoped he was still a little bit of his old self so he allowed himself to engage in conversation
Anyhow, another clue? This:
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He remembers how Heaven works. He remembers he was a high ranking angel. Satan, he remembers the bloody passwords!
Do you know what else he remembers?
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Cause they didn't throw that line in there for nothing. No, gents. Cmon. Nothing is random in Good Omens
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He knows who he was. He remembers being the Star Maker that hung the stars in the sky
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He remembers why he fell, for goodness sake
And the fact that he remembers everything makes all of it so much more tragic, doesn't it? He remembers his life before the Fall, his supposed friends that dragged him into the pit with them, what Her love felt like, the "mistakes" he made that led to his Fall
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And it must have hurt. It must have hurt so much when he found himself in a pit of boiling sulfur with his wings completely burned and without Her love because he remembered it all. He must have been so bloody confused for so long
He might have regretted it. All the questions and the company he kept that made him Fall. But he doesn't anymore.
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He knows he doesn't need Heaven, he doesn't need Hell. They are toxic. All he needs is his pacific fragile existence on Earth with Aziraphale and yet...well, that's something else he won't forget now, is it?
*clears throat*
I rest my case
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grugruel · 10 months
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Let the Light in
Pairing: priest!Bucky x f!reader
MDNI/NSFW
Masterlist
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Summary: On the day of your wedding, you excpect to love your husband, not fall for the priest.
You'd never been a believer. But when your marrige spiraled into darkness, you had to find light elsewere. So you asked the Lord for help, and He answered.
Ironically enough, He gave you a most devout follower, the priest.
Word count: ca 4k
Warnings: fluff, angst, blasphemy, soft!priest!bucky, pinv sex, oral sex (f receiving), passionate sex, fingering, thigh-riding, adultry, praise (m receiving), priest kink.
AN: its been proof read! I dont understand how yall read it before the fact, my misspellings were crazy. I also edited it a bit, gave yall about 200-300 words more.
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I stod silently on the sidewalk, with my back to the road. Numbly observing the scene in front of me as I waited. Cars were rushing past behind me, slowing as they noticed the crowd.
The chilly autumn winds blew my coat off of my stocking clad legs, revealing them to the elements. I couldnt be bothered to care.
The cold did not affect me anymore, I was strung out on feeling.
I watched my husband struggle, and the guests scramble to help him. They got him on his feet, and his best man slung an arm around him to keep him from falling again. My eyes brimmed with tears, ready to fall any second now.
I felt a hand touch the small of my back in silent support. A palm pressed firmly into the arch below, fingertips curling, rouching the fabric of my dress. I closed my eyes and all my troubles were wisked away for but a second, until I heard the guests approach and the hand left me. I opened my eyes to a grim sight.
We met in college, my husband and I. He'd been lovely and attentive when we first met, he made me fall in love with him. He proposed to me on our graduation, and i'd never been happier.
Unfortunately though, it didnt last that long.
As we were fresh out of school, both with stellar scores and brand new degrees. We got our dream jobs, and bought ourselves our dream home.
Everything was perfect, until he got fired. Why? He wouldnt tell me, he left me in the dark, refusing to tell me himself.
Naturally, I grew suspicious.
So I called his former boss, who told me that they'd caught him with his secretary bent over his desk. They said he'd gotten a reputation within his business and would be experiencing difficulties in finding a new job for himself. My crying increased gradually through out the call, this was the first time hed let me down after all. His boss was very apologetic and so was my fiancé.
He found me sat on the floor with phone in hand, a complete mess of tears and running mascara. Immedietly showing worry, 'Whats going on, whats happened?' He asked, thinking somebody died. But when I glared at him, repaying his silence with my own, he understood. He stuttered an apology, his words a flurry of explanations and sorrys, sounding truly regretful.
So I forgave him, silly me.
With time, bitterness manifested within him. Resentment over the fact that I was well liked and did good work at my own job. It led him down a pityfull path, finding solace in alcohol, resentment turning into lousey drunkeness. I should've left him, but chose to forgive him. I loved him, despite all.
Eventually he found a new job, nowehere near the prestige of his old one. But it calmed his drinking.
When he sobered slightly, he apologized continously. Telling me he promised to get better and told me he wanted to have our ceremony, because I deserved it. Foolishly, I belived him. He stayed sober several weeks before the wedding, and I thought it could be a new start.
But here we are now.
I stood behind the doors of the nave, inhaling and exhaling big shaky breaths, trying to gather strength for what I was about to throw myself into.
The priest, father Barnes. The one who would be marrying us, came to me before I walked down the aisle.
'Miss.' He began, his eyes pleading as he took my hands into his, 'Its now my place, I know. But your betrothed-'
'Youre right, its not.' I cut him off, the idea of discussing my fiancés indiscretions with the priest was not appealing. 'I apologize father.' I sighed and met his eyes, 'Hes drunk isnt he?'
The priest tilted his head to the side, realising I was already well aquainted with the vice, 'Well, yes. . .' He said, sounding apologetic.
I nodded my head, deep in thought, 'Alright, lets not waste anymore time then.'
'You're still going ahead with the wedding?' He asked me, an incredulous expression shaping his face.
I looked down, studying the intricate details of my wedding dress. Id picked it myself, my favourite flowers covered it. That man of mine doesnt know my favourite in anything, nor would he notice them on my dress.
A melancholic smile covered my lips, 'You must think me foolish father.' I whispered under my breath, chuckling quietly.
He shook his head and moved one of his hands to my chin, tilting my face to meet his. The other grabbed my hands, and squeezed them, 'I think youre strong.' He told me, a reassuring smile on his lips.
'He promised me he would get better.' My voice was meak, a tear streaking my face.
'You're a good woman.' He breathed, letting go of my hands to cup my face. He leveled his head with mine, his tall stature forcing him to hunch as his eyes locked with mine, 'Too, good.' He whispered, 'And, Its not my business, thats true. . .' Another tear fell, and he gently stroked it away with his thumb, 'But he does not deserve your kindness.'
My cheeks burned hot, a blush crept up my face. I had not heard such kind words in a long time. I could not controll my crying any longer, unstoppable tears came rolling down my cheeks, 'I have to believe him, father, I have to try.' I told him quietly, hating how desperate my voice sounded.
'I love him.'
He cringed at the words, furrowing his brows 'I admire your devotion.' He said gently, 'Do you want more time? Im sure we can wait a little longer.' He tried, but I shook my head.
'No, I dont want to keep the guests waiting.' I took a deep breath, 'Do I look ok?' I asked him.
He nodded, but pulled the cuff over his hand and dabbed my cheeks dry.
His eyes flickered over my face, studying my features, my wet eyes and rosy cheeks. He leaned in, kissed my cheek and whispered 'Angelic.' His hands fell to my bare shoulders and gave them a reassuring squeeze.
He turned around and as he was about the leave I grabbed hold of his wrist, carefully tugging him back. He faced me and I let go of him realising that perhaps it wasnt appropriate of me. 'I just-' I began, but my voice broke. He met my eyes and pulled me into his embrace, 'Thank you, father.' I whispered against his chest.
He rested his head on your shoulder and rubbed your back gently, holding onto the fabric of your dress, rubbing it between his fingers. Studying the beautiful pattern. He slid his hands up your arms, feeling a sudden urge to kiss the bare skin beneath him. He pulled back hastily, clearing his throat as he silently rebuked himself.
'I must take my place dear.' He said, stroking a piece of hair behind my ear. He gave me a last smile, then left, taking his place by the altar.
I heard the music starting and the muffled sound of the crowd standing up. I sighed, steadied my breathing, and opened the doors to the nave. Everyone turned around, looking at me. Whispers rumbled through the crowd as I began walking, their stares were making me nervous.
Through the gloom of the church, light shone through the windows at the altar. I looked at him for comfort, handsome as he was, I met his eyes and found it within them.
He could not tear his eyes from you, you were the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen, courageous and proud, you walked down the aisle. When your eyes met his, he smiled proudly. Hoping you would find some comfort in it, and you found it.
As I approached the altar, I tore my eyes from his and looked at my fiancé. His best man holding him upright, otherwise slumping over. He smiled sloppily at me, I gave him a strained smile back.
The ceremony was over quickly, my husband stumbled through his vows and his kiss tasted of smoke and whiskey. In fact, the entirety of him was drenched in the odor.
I smiled and thanked everyone as they congratulted us, and carefully, tiptoed around the subject of my husband.
I hurried to change into my reception dress, it was all black. Black coat, dress, heels and stockings. Fitting, I thought. As this felt more like a funeral than a wedding, burrying the woman I once was.
People were drinking, laughing and dancing. The reception was doing a wonderful job of keeping everyone cheery, everyone except me. I sat silently by our table, watching my husband as he kept drinking and his men trying to calm him down. He had barely spoken a word to me, he was to drunk to stand, to drunk to have our first dance. I felt myself sinking into oblivion as my polite smiles and thank yous were running out.
But someone approched me, snapping me out of the darkness. I looked up, and the light returned.
He reached his hand out to me, 'May I have this dance?' He asked, his white collar stark against his black shirt.
'You may.' I smiled, the first genuine smile I'd given anyone since the night begun.
I laid my hand in his and he led me to the edge of the dance floor, somewhere we could be at peace. In our dark colors we went unseen, tucked away from prying eyes.
I snaked my arms around his neck and his arms circled my waist, pulling me tightly against him. A bit unorthodox perhaps. But I didnt mind and neither did he, it seemed. I leaned my head against him as we swayed to the music, basking in eachothers prescence.
He sensed that you werent interested in talking, but rather needed a shoulder to lean on. Someone to hold you up, as your ungrateful husband couldnt even do that for himself.
For several songs, we just held eachother. Until the evening began winding down and we had to depart.
'I think this was a mistake.' He whispered.
'Which part?' I asked, and he sighed.
'Dont hesitate to come to me if you need anyhting.' He said quietly, 'Please.' he pleaded. I nodded, thinking id never take him up on his offer.
Now, I stood on the street. Still feeling the priests hand on my back although he'd already taken a few secure steps back.
I watched as my husband being carried to our car, as we were headed for our honeymoon. Two weeks in rome, I wish I could truthfully say I was excited. They shoved him into the back, and once again congratulated us with cheapish smiles. I walked around the car and opened the door, about to sit down when a hand slid into mine. I looked up and my eyes met his beautiful blues once again. He assisted me into the car, lending me his strong arm for support as I sat down. His hand slid out of mine, and a note was left in my palm, reflexicely I closed my hand around it. 'Anything.' He whispered and backed away, closing the door gently.
Our car drove off as the guests were waving us of, but all I could think about was the priest disappearing in the distance.
I opened the note, written down was his number and adress along with a few intricately drawn flowers.
I smiled to myself, quickly stashing it away in my pocket, afraid my husband would see. But as I looked at him, I realised. He was dead asleep, snoring even.
I opened my hand, tracing my fingertips along my palm. Trying to recreate the feeling of his hand in mine, his gentle, yet firm touch on my skin. I sighed, feeling my tears returning.
I cried silently, afraid to wake him. The driver looked at me through his rearview mirror, I met his eyes and quickly averted my gaze, crying even harder, but I couldnt even do that in peace. God, what had I done. I leaned my head against the seat, closing my eyes. When suddenly, I felt fingers on my knee. I shut my eyes harder, begging for it to be my imagination. But it wasnt.
'My, beautiful wife.' He drawled, tracing a finger along my jaw as his hand slid up my thigh. He sat forward, leaning towrd the drivers compartment and shut the hatch.
I opened my eyes and faced him, 'Aw, crying of joy sweetheart?' He asked, he was so delusional it was scary. I nodded, and feigned a smile which he returned lazily, then leaned in to kissed me.
I closed my eyes again, canceling out the taste and smell of liqour, shutting my ears to his voice.
And when his finger reached under my dress, It no longer felt like him. My husbands face was no longer my husbands, his voice and touch was someone elses.
All of a sudden my core was aching for more.
His kisses on my skin felt like heaven, his touch like fire and when he pulled me on top of him. I opened my eyes, and was met with blue, black and white.
Weeks went by and my thoughts never left father Barnes, whenever my husband made love to me, I made love to a priest.
Eventually his drinking subdued and he started taking care of himself, but grew more distant by the day.
It did actually make my existence bareable.
But there came a day, when I got home from work early and things were not as they should. The were heels in the doorway and clothes strewn on the floor. As I followed their trail, I found my husband and his secretary at the end of them. Naked, sweaty and monaing, in our bed, in our home. I was quiet, lost for words, but they mustve noticed my presence.
Because they stopped and threw the sheets over themselves, covering up. 'Sweetheart, its not what it seems.' He managed, struggling to clme up with an excuse. God, the stumache on that man. I felt like screaming, like cursing him and his entire bloodline. But he wasnt worth it.
I turned on my heel and he scrambled out of bed, dragging the sheet with him as he followed me out of the house, apologizing prefusely.
I shut him out, rage filling me as I got in my car and drove away. I drove to the only adress that came to mind.
I walked up to his house and knocked on the door, a few moments passed and he opened.
With wide eyes he looked at me, unable to hide his surpise. 'I uhm, I-' I stammered, my own surpise catching up to me. I hadnt had time to think this through, I acted on pure instinct. 'He cheated on me.' I got the words out, finally taking a breath as I finally understood their meaning. Misery overtook my rage, and my eyes welled as I tried to explain myself. 'I apologize for barging in on you father.' I started, 'Ive been thinking about you and I-' rambling, all my thoughts and feelings poured out of me. In the doorway of this poor mans home.
He reached out to me and pulled me into a hug, backing away from the door and let it fall shut behind me. He rested his head on top of mine as one of his hands held my head against his chest, stroking my hair. The warmth of his home embracing me.
'Can I confess something father?' I asked him as I laid my arms around him, much like our dance a few weeks ago.
'Anything.' He answered, kissing the top of my head.
'Ive sinned.'
He pulled back with a confused look on his face, but didnt let go. 'Lets hear it.' He ordered patiently.
'Ive. . . Been thinking of another man.' I whispered, looking deep into his eyes. 'During actions that should only take place between husband and wife.' I told him quietly, and his face grew pale. 'Ive had an emotional affair with this man, unbeknownst to him.' My breathing turned heavy, as my gaze switched to his lips, 'But, me and this man. Were both bound by vows you see.' I said and let go of him, understanding my words as I said them, and stepped back. Suddenly regretting coming here, as I felt rejection was imminent. 'Mine are already broken, but his are not and he cannot break them. He would not.'
'You should let the man speak for himself.' He said, serious in tone. His gaze locked in on me, as he stepped closer. 'I havent been able to stop thinking about you, no matter how hard I've tried.' He whispered, laying his hands on my hips. 'Ive never seen a woman so beautiful walking down the aisle, god himself mustve blessed you.' I snaked my hands around his shoulders, burrying them in his hair. 'Im hoping he would bless us, too.' Leaning in, his lips were a ghost over mine. 'I would care for you, in a way your husband never could. He does not deserve you.' He leaned his forehead agagaist mine, 'I'd work everyday to deserve your love, your kindness, your presence.' He said quietly against my lips, planting a gentle kiss on them and pulling back slightly to give me room. But I chased his lips, returning the kiss feverishly. Grabbing a fistful of his hair as I pulled him impossibly closer. His hands roamed my back, reaching under my shirt to undo my bra. It fell to the floor and he pulled my shirt over my head in one quick motion, making me gasp.
I removed the collar of his shirt with my teeth and ripped his black shirt open, burrying my head in the crook of his neck, 'Youre not a beginner, are you father? I asked, between kisses. Breathing heavily as I latched onto his skin, sucking at the sweet spot between his neck and collarbone.
He moaned, a smirk shaping his lips, 'Saints also sin from time to time.' he breathed, his hands falling to my ass and lifted me into his arms. I chuckled, letting go of his neck and circled my legs around his hips. I pushed my bare breasts against him and he burried his face in them, in turns taking them into his mouth. 'Where?' His voice came muffled by my skin.
'Everywhere.' I answered.
I could feel his grin against my skin, as he nipped my nipple with his teeth, making me yelp. He walked us toward his bedroom, and laid me down on his bed. He stood back, studying me as he took his shirt and pants off. I unbuttoned my own pants and shimmied out of them, raising myself onto my elbows, watching him as he took me in. His eyes roamed my body, thighs, hips, stumache, breasts. He loved all of me, 'Youre perfect.' He said, lust in his eyes as he climbed on top of me. 'I need you.' He whispered.
'You'll have me.' I told him and flipped him over. Positioning him against the headboard as I stradled his thigh, grinning wickedly and leaned forward, kissing his jaw. 'But first-' I whispered against his ear, 'I want to test your self control.' He looked confused, and I began grinding my clit against his thigh, a whimper escaping me. His hands flew to my hips to help me along, but I grabbed them and led them up to the headboard. I leveled my face with his, ghosting my lips over his as I had him hold onto the board, 'No touching.' I whispered and pecked his lips. I leaned back and my grinding resumed, I grabbed his thighs for support as the heat from the friction was making me swoon. I leaned my head back, biting my lip from the pleasure and when I looked back at him, he was holding onto the board for dear life. The muscles in his arms and jaw clenching as he fought himself to stay still, his eyes were running up and down my body.
The way your hips swayed and breasts bounced, it was sucking all the restraint out of him. His hands were itching to touch you, to just feel your skin under his fingertips for a moment. It would keep him fed for the rest of his life.
I hummed, 'Im- im gonna-' I stammered, my breaths frenzied as I was closing in on my orgasm. The crazy in his eyes made me smile devilishly, I felt evil, in the best way. My hips stuttered against his thigh, my ruts becoming faster and shorter as I was approaching my release. When I looked at him, his eyes were pleading, begging for permission, but it was to late. I rushed over the edge in a second, collapsing onto him, panting hard as I was catching my breath.
'May I?' He asked, his voice strained.
I kissed his chest and answered, 'Yes, please. You did so good.' He grunted at the praise, surprising me. He grabbed my ribs and threw me under him, hurridly kissing his way down my body until he reached my thighs. Spreading them, he kissed his way up the inside until he reached my panties. Without a second thought he ripped them apart and burried his face in my cunt. Tasting me, licking my juices, sliding his tongue through my folds and kissing my clit. A string of curses fell from my lips, as he pushed a finger inside of me, carefully sliding it in and out. Then adding another, and eventually a third, he thrusted them into me, my moaning telling him he was on the right track. He curled them into my spot and I nearly screamed.
'Just like that, good job.' I breathed and he moaned against my clit. What fun. He reached into his boxers and stroked himself, the sight made me mad. And for the second time, I came tumbling over the edge. He was not far behind, coming into his own hand, drenching himself in his seed. I grabbed his arm and pulled his hand closer to me, licking a stripe of his hand. He grunted at the sight, spurring me on as I took his fingers into my mouth. Sucking him clean as he watched, furrowing his brows, he became plagued by lust.
I pulled him closer to me, meeting his lips in another kiss as he pulled off his boxers. I reached down, stroking him as I lined him up with my entrance, 'You did such a good job, father.' His head perked at the praise, like a puppy being told hes a good boy. Gratefully pecking my face, cheek, chin and jaw, below my ear and neck. He put his weight on me, we couldnt possibly get any closer to one another. 'I need you in me father.' I told him bluntly, and leveled his head with mine, sliding inside. Kissing me mean while and I moaned into his mouth, sharing my breath with him. I laid my hands on his hips, telling him to move by pulling and pushing. Helping him set a gentle but firm pace, he lowered his head to the crook of my neck, his breath hot against my skin. 'Let me hear you father, dont hold back.' I whispered and appreciatively he grunted against my skin, moaning in my ear. It was fiendish, it was fantastic. 'Deeper, please.' I asked, pulling on his hips to drive him deeper and using the weight of his entire body he thrusted into me, in rythm with his grunts as our bodiess moved together.
'Tell me im good, please.' He begged, nuzzling his face into my neck.
I smiled, 'Youre being so good for me father.' I whispered into his hair.
'Thank you.' He whimpered, putting even more force to his thrusts as he traced my collarbone with kisses, all the way to my shoulder, repeating "Thank you." Over and over again inbetween his kisses. His thrusts were coming faster as he was closing in on his orgasm, driving me over the edge with him. 'I- im- im close.' He stuttered faintly.
'So am I, almost there father.' His pace hastened as his hand slithered between our bodies, finding my clit and circled it. 'God' I moaned, spots specking my vision as the priests thrusts became frenzied. He pinched my skin in warning, reminding me not to take the lords name in vain. Then we came together, and he collapsed on top of me.
'Im sorry for swearing, father. You bring it out of me.' I whispered.
He chuckled, 'Youre forgiven.' Throughout the night, we made love on the couch, the floor, the kitchen table and shower.
Eventually, we got back into bed. Holding eachother tightly as we drifted off to sleep.
When I woke up late the next day, there was a vase of flowers on the bedside table with a note under it, the letter "-B" was written on it.
I unfolded it and he had written me a message, "I had to go to church, but didnt want to wake you. I hope on seeing you later, please stay if you want to. Id love to come home to you. -PS, Your favourites."
I smiled happily and smelled the bouqet of tulips, a soft, warm feeling spreading throughout my body.
For a long time love had felt dark to me, it had felt cold and lonely, but now. . .
I had let the light in, he was my light.
1K notes · View notes
Text
Bau x reader , where the reader is in an abusive relationship
Warnings: abusive relationship , blood , slightly yandere bau , gn reader , could be perceived as a poly bau
Summary: you are in an abusive relationship and when you call Hotch crying , they all rush to your side
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The people in this team are smart and their job is literally to be observing
They obviously notice your change of behavior the moment you step out of the elevator the day you had met him/her
The energy you gave of , the way you talked and even your choice of clothes made them assume you had met someone. They totally DIDNT feel jealous at all
But you seemed happy and they had no control over you
Penelope was the one to ask and learn about the charming kind man you just met.
So the was the one who informed the others
She stalked all of his accounts and pulled out his criminal records (that were clean) his financial state and everything about him
Not even two weeks after you entered the building with a new air on you
You were shining in happiness
Everyone could feel It and everyone knew
Morgan definitely did not do an extra harsh box training that evening with Enily
And Spencer obviously did not complain to Hotch about it all day
And hotch certainly didn't almost tear apart a book in frustation
Also Penelope did not cry on JJ s shoulder and neither did the opposite happen
Then , one day exactly one month later you were gloomy
The team almost held an interrogation to find out why
Turns out your boyfriend and you had just had a super intense fight that ended up in yelling
They were quick to offer you to spent the night with one of them
Or they could book a hotel room for you
You declined saying you need to solve this out
This went on for a long of time
The weather became worst day by day and you were the first one on the team to wear a long sleeved shirt
They didn't think much of it
Your mood was drastically changing , your once bubbly and happy personality disappearing
They were all extremely worried but they didn't know what could have caused it
' Do you think it's that boyfriend of theirs?'
Morgan asked once . They all appeared worried at the thought
JJ was sent to ask you about your relationship but you quite convincingly talked in excitement and contempt about it
They were obviously worried sick ,but could do nothing about it , since they had no idea what the problem was
When they were all out together , Hotch received a call by you
You were crying and stuttering your words
' Hotch' you breathed out
' y/n? Where are you?what has happened?'
He asked and all the others gazes fell on him , their faces twisting in confusion
' I -uhhh I am on my apartment. He has left but I'm hurting a lot. Please come help'
You had said. Calling Hotch was a conscious decision since he was definitely a safe person to you and the whole team.
While Morgan could beat someone up easier and Emily was a very violent person when needed , Aaron just had this energy that he gave off.
He could protect you and you knew it
They all hoped In two cars and were to your in no time.
You were lying on the floor sobbing , with blood around you
Spencer was the one to check up on you , covering your wounds
While JJ called the police
Morgan along with Penelope were frozen on the doorway
And Aaron was right by your side pushing your hair out of your face and whispering in your ear
You were badly hurt
The paramedics arrived and Spencer rode the ambulance with you.
Penelope and Aaron followed with their car while the other three remained on your apartment
They decided to clean it up, JJ bringing the chemicals to remove the blood , while Morgan angrily scrubbed the floor
' How could he? '
Whispered Emily enraged
Then they heard keys on the door
' Honey I am so sorry for what happened, but look I brought you flo-'
A man entered the apartment and appeared shocked to find your colleagues there
Morgan had risen up staring at the man with deep hatred in his eyes
Let's say that the man returned to his house with a lot of bruises , a bunch of threats and two days later his computer caught a virus
You were in the hospital, getting better
Penelope was in the chair besides your bed working something on her computer
Once you were woken up and not high, you received a lot of hugs and sweet words
When you could finally return home they all sat you down . You knew this conversation was coming
' We want you to feel comfortable telling us about things that are going wrong in your life '
Hotch had said his voice and characteristics unnaturally soft.
' Why didn't you tell us?'
JJ wondered and you had no acceptable answer
The day ended in a lot of tears and hugs.
You quickly returned to your workplace where you were greeted with a cake that had wobbly written on it ' welcome back'
Thay would always remind you to be careful in the field for at least a month.
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