#death kebab

[carionto]

Another "oopsie"

The *sigh*... Death Kebab, did a test fire today.

A single tungsten-alloy round, twenty centimeters in diameter, three meters long, just over two thousand kilos, and accelerated by a 610 kilometer long rail cannon, powered by hundreds of their ridiculous true fusion reactor mini stars.

It is, by a factor of stupid, the most powerful gun, if you can even call it that, ever built. Actually, the most powerful single anything ever built. So far.

Upon ejection, the rod was traveling at 0.842103C at what everyone thought was empty space for billions of light years. Except, the middle moon of this... thing... wasn't aligned perfectly, thus changing the inclination of the midsection by less than 0.002 degrees, which altered the exit trajectory by three one billionths of a degree.

In space, this Human attitude of "eh, close enough" they have for most of their things does not cut it when dealing with literal world ending devices. Which this miscalculation will in just over two hundred years.

Typical redirection and space hazard elimination methods simply can't handle this. It's projected that the projectile will potentially shoot through the planet or eject enough mass out the other side at still impressive velocities, triggering a sort of shotgun scatter effect in countless directions. Or just blow up the planet, we don't know. Simulations, no matter how advanced, can only tell us so much about something that has never happened before.

As members of the Coalition, Humanity has been officially tasked to prevent this senseless destruction under penalty of... we'll figure something out. Again, nobody ever thought someone could accidentally literally blow up a planet, we don't have protocols for this!

It doesn't help the Humans are not showing enough worry about this either. The first thing they did was hyper jump a junked freighter they loaded up with high density alloys and plating and explosives in front of the round. Fuck all that did except a giant explosion. Maybe slowed it down by a few hundred km/s, and potentially changed its course?

It is quite hard to track a thing going so fast when it's not within a star system. Nobody has managed to establish a monitoring network throughout all of empty space, some of our ancient civilizations tried - astronomical waste of time and resources, a logistical nightmare, bare cosmic radiation meant constant maintenance, zero use. Except now, for a thing Humans did.

Oh, their next plan is to shoot a smaller round AT the first one and obliterate them both. Sure? We guess it can't get wor-

They're gonna accidentally figure out a way to make this worse, aren't they?

[jellybeanium124]

stede: tonight we're having deconstructed kebabs ed: the sticks fell out? stede: ........the meat stuck to the grill

[obituarybug]

My favorite part of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is when the Part's main villian with a time related stand reveals their true power and identity by punching a hole through my favorite character's stomach (using their Stand) while a JoJo is in close but not immediate proximity

[roychewtoy]

impaled

[play-now-my-lord]

in the late Usamerican death cult, many offered worship despite other overt religious commitments via a ritual experts call "Grilling". An informal canon is beginning to emerge describing the feast days and seasons of the calendar during which "Grilling" was acceptable. Those prepared to participate in the late Usamerican death cult assembled in small gatherings outdoors in private residences or state-owned land; they would then light contained fires to cook forcemeat and small cuts over an open grill. While some suggest this is a ritualistic reenactment of cooking methods that predominated before the electric range, it remained prominent even in households with gas or other ranges, and evidence has emerged that many households maintained both a gas range and a gas grill. The openness of the grill was of sacredotal importance; drippings of fat and myoglobin would both feed and foul the fire, ritually recreating the subordination of the natural world to the thanatos complex. It was rare, sometimes even actively discouraged, for these grills to be cleaned in spite of obvious food safety concerns.

Despite late Usamerican culture's famous fixation on meaningless choices at the point of consumption of material goods, the master of ceremonies was expected and encouraged to impose "correct" gustatory choices on the ritual participants, and in all cases it was taken as granted that the host would choose and openly express strong opinions on the fuel source, acceptable 'brands' and varieties of forcemeat and small cuts, etc. While this ritual complex was similar to a related tradition in late Usamerican culture, the "Dinner Party", key differences include the anticipation of male leadership (possibly suggesting a late evolution of the patriarchial "Grilling" complex against the backdrop of a more matriarchial/matrilocal society), a relatively standardized bill of fare, and in direct contradistinction to the "Dinner Party" complex, the clear expectation of a radically imbalanced nutritional profile favoring fat and protein. It is debated whether alcoholic libations were ever central to the late Usamericans' understanding of "Grilling"; yet it is certain that even for female participants, where drinking did take place, beer and neat spirits were favored, and wines and mixed beverages were regarded as inappropriate.

"Grilling" is a subject on which voluminous scholarship exists, and this survey is necessarily too brief to contain research done on several aspects and sub-complexes in the late Usamerican death cult, including the predominance of plastic and plastic-coated utensils and servingware regarded as single-use, the loose canon of acceptable and unacceptable forcemeats, the emergence, exoticization, and decline of the "Shish Kebab", and the layers of ironic subtext in "Grilling"-dominated late Usamerican works like King of the Hill or Twitter. Strange as it might seem to us, "Grilling" tied late Usamerican men together in casual yet firm homosocial bonds (while both reflecting and reaffirming existing dominance-submission relationships) almost as efficiently as men throughout history have typically achieved by simply fucking nasty

[py-dreamer]

Click pic for less sh!tty quality ig

Ok so I will admit I did use @maplesleep's format for this again but I wanted to compile these cakes into one drawing and what better way than one of those cute, fancy cake stands?

And the background was too cut to use, I hope you don't mind...heh

Anyways, I know the prices seem outrageous but my main justification is that you're also getting extra sugar cookies, decorations, cut fruits, sometimes kebabs/tanghulu, sometimes rock candy and extraw sweets on the side. Heck, Wukong's even has a mini stack of pancakes on top so I basically doubled the price and honestly if it was this detailed, I'd hope the price isn't too unreasonable

So what do y'all think? Would you buy a slice?

(Also the names are half-assed, you only get 1 slice per payment ig and if you missed the names, here they are:

Xiaotian: The hero's first taste of victory

Xiaojiao: Mei's kiwi boba delight

Nezha: Nezha's slice of heaven

Tang & Pigsy: Freenoodle's tangy berry treat

Sandy: Sandy's jiggly summer voyage

Red Son: The demon bull prince's extra hot surprise

Chang'e: Chang'e's bunny-jelly mooncake

Mihou: Macaque's piece of the night

Wukong: The delectable legend of the monkey king)

WARNING: ANY DAMAGE CAUSED BY, IMPALEMENT, ABSORBTION OF THE SOUL, HUGGED TO DEATH, BURNED TO DEATH, BLINDED BY BEAUTY TO DEATH, SPINE RIPPED OFF, RIPPING AT THE SEAMS FROM CHAOS, EATEN BY DRAGONS, COOKED IN A STEW IS NOT THE RESPONSIBILITY OF 'Monkie Kid Bakery' IF ATTEMPTS WERE MADE TO INGEST THE CHARACTERS

[nrilliree]

“A son for a son!” oh just you wait, you inbred audacious psycho.

I love Jace, but I can't wait to see Rhaenyra suffer. I hate her so much, she has no brain, no attitude to rule.... what a idiotic character

Team Rotten Cucumber Color thinks they're incredibly funny when they laugh at Jace's death. You know, the Jace who got on his dragon and went into real combat to save his little brothers, and died along with his dragon. But they believe that Daeron, who died crushed by the burning tent, and Aemond, who in terror tried to unfasten himself from the saddle before being pierced by a sword like a shish kebab, died the death of heroes… Those who slaughtered entire cities and burned the realm. To whom Aegon wanted to build great golden monuments while the realm was in war and famine. Because, you know, they have "brains and the ability to rule." Obviously…

And they think the death of these "inbred bastards" is funny, because you know incest, haha ​​hihi, but… I guess they don't know that the children of the niece and uncle are much less "inbred" than the children of siblings 🤔 (Before someone says "Rhaenyra wanted it, Aegon didn't!" let me remind you that Aegon was the heir of absolutely nothing, so he didn't need heirs and didn't have to consummate the marriage… like Daemon and Rhea for example.) Does that mean that since "the children are inbred" and the parents are "audacious psychos" that means we can make fun of their deaths? In that case, the deaths of Jaehaerys, Jaehaery and Maelor should also be hilarious jokes, because they are also "inbred freaks of nature".

Have you seen TB's posts about "You want revenge, not dignity? Oh just you wait, you rapist audacious psycho. You'll get revenge! (Here's a picture of Jaehaera thrown out of the window/Maelor torn apart by the crowd)". Strangely enough, I don't 🤔

[shiratamahatsumiyo]

TWST with an Angelic Mage reader

Warning: Reader is suicidal, slight swearing.

Angel Magic revolves around summoning angels, each of which are capable of inflicting different kinds of damage. An Angelic Mage can summon them through the use of Angel Coins. Each coin representing a portion of the user's lifespan. If the summoned angel is defeated, the user will suffer great pain. Only powerful Angelic Mages are capable of summoning basic angels without a cost and suffer no drawbacks when they are defeated.

...Listen, I'm gonna be honest with you guys...

I don't really give a shit about the lore of the characters, I'm mostly interested in the magic/skills they use (examples: Blood Mage, Angelic Mage).... Why do I like risky magic concept? I don't know. I just think they're creative. Like, when there's a protagonist that just punches things with fire magic, ooh so classic. When there's an antagonist with a destructive magic but there's one flaw or loophole about it that the protagonist has to figure out in order to defeat them, wow ok cool... BUT THEN THERE'S THAT ONE SIDE CHARACTER EITHER THAT DOESN'T GET ENOUGH SCREENTIME OR WE'LL NEVER GET TO SEE AGAIN THAT HAS A CREATIVE CONCEPT OF THEIR MAGIC: SUMMONS ANGELS, CONTROL BLOOD VESSELS, STABS THEMSELVES TO UNLEASH THEIR BUILT-UP MANA TO DEMOLISH SHIT. LITERALLY DESTROYS EVERYTHING INCLUDING THEMSELVES BECAUSE HELL NAH THEY AIN'T GOING TO JAIL.

...Sorry, I'm just rambling at this point, please excuse me. Now, onto the story!

• .............................................................................

• .........................This is boring.

• You thought that it's your time to arrive at death's door but no. Instead, you have to wait inside this stupid coffin for what it feels like eternity. Thank god that this fiery gremlin gave you an excuse to come out. This way, the Grim Reaper won't punish you for coming out of your coffin~

• Oh! It looks like this creature's name is Grim. How cute! Until he demanded that you strip. Not cute! What's that? He'll roast you if you won't strip off your robe? What a coincidence! Your little angels are hungry for some weasel, silly Grim 😊........... Run🙂.

{Meanwhile, at the ceremony}

• While the Dark Mirror sorts all of the students to their respective dorms, Crowley went to the Hall of Mirrors to fetch the last coffin. He was quite puzzled when the coffin did not respond to his call to levitate to the ceremony room.

Dark Mirror: "Hmmm... Heartslabyul!"

Azul: "My, that's quite a number of students for this year."

Leona: "Yawn... When will this be over?"

Riddle: "How impatient, Kingscholar. There's only 1 hour and 23 minutes left until the ceremony ends and that's your 12th yawn."

Idia, via tablet: "Dude, you've been counting his yawns?"

Kalim: "Huh... Is that enough time for Jamil to prepare the Welcoming Party?"

{Meanwhile at Scarabia}

Jamil, setting up the plates: "WHERE IS THE CHICKEN SALAD?!"

Scarabia Student A, cutting the vegetables: "I'M MAKING IT--"

Jamil: "DO IT FASTER! WHY IS THIS KEBAB STILL RAW?!"

Scarabia Student B, holding a flaming pan: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--"

{Back at the ceremony}

Kalim: "...Nah, It's Jamil! I'm sure he can handle it."

Vil: "Bring the next coffin. I still have an interview tonight."

• The headmage returned to the room with no coffin.

Crowley: "... I think we'll be behind schedule for a bit."

Leona: "And what do you mean by that ?"

Crowley: "The last coffin is empty."

Vil: "... Pardon?"

Riddle: "How in Twisted Wonderland...?"

Azul: "Impossible. That can't be."

Crowley: "Do not worry! For I will graciously search for them myself--"

• Just as he was about to turn back with his lash, a small screaming monster burst through the doors and ran inside the room. The monster hid behind Crowley, using him like a shield. The students overheard the loud monster and pulled out their magical pens.

Grim: "FNYAAAAH! THEY'RE GONNA EAT ME!"

Crowley: "What the- Halt, monster! You should not be on campus-"

Grim: "THEY'RE SCARY! DON'T LET THEM GET NEAR ME! SHUT THE DOORS BEFORE THEY GET IN!!"

Crowley: "Who?"

?????!??????: "...Hehehe...😊"

• The two looked at the hallway of the door and see a silhouette of a person approaching the room. The headmage then recognized the robe and immediately thought that the person is the missing student. The alerted students put away your magical pen, thinking that the monster is your familiar.

Grim: "I-IT'S THEM! CLOSE IT! CLOSE IIIT!!"

?????!??????: "Be not afraid 😇."

Grim: "Fnyaagh!!"

Crowley: "Ah! You must be the last student. Quite the impatient one, are you?"

?????!??????: "I apologize. But I simply couldn't bear to wait any longer."

Crowley: "You must also tame your familiar properly! Look at how afraid he is of you!"

Grim: "Fnyagh?! Heck no! I'm not this weirdo's pet! A-and the Great Grim's scared of no one!"

?????!??????: "You're not? Oh well, I guess I just misunderstood your appearance then."

Crowley: "He's not yours?"

Grim & ?????!??????: "Nope!"

Crowley: "Then I will order students to throw this beast off of campus."

Grim: "FNYAGH! WAIT, YA CAN'T DO THAT! I'M A MAGE HERE! NOOOOO!! JUST YOU WAIT! I'LL BE THE GREATEST MAGE IN THIS SCHOOL!!!"

• The headmage then called a couple of students to restrain the monster and drag him out of the room. It's a shame~ You really thought that this feline will guide you to heaven but you couldn't help but feel a little bad. Just a little bit. Wait, did he just say school?

Crowley: "Ahem! Without further ado, let the ceremony continue! Please stand in front of the Dark Mirror and say your name."

?????!??????: "...Why?"

Crowley: "To sort you, of course. Now go."

Leona: "Finally. This stupid ceremony better be over.... Yawn"

Riddle: "That's your 13th yawn."

Idia: "Bruh, just stop counting."

• You noted that some students still kept their guard up, thinking that if the monster was so scared of you to the point of running and hiding, then you might be the bigger monster. The students near you stepped away after sensing your heavy aura.

• The mask-wearing man shoved you in front of an old, intricately designed mirror. A face appeared on the surface, scowling at you.

Dark Mirror: "State thy name."

AngelMage! Yuu: "AngelMage! Yuu."

• The mirror stared intensely at you before expressing shock and disdain. Almost like it sees through you...

Dark Mirror: "...This soul does not belong in any dorm."

• The crowd of students gasped in shock and the headmage is in disbelief. Whispers among the students soon filled the room, creating an uncomfortable atmosphere.

Crowley: "I do not understand! The Ebony Carriage would never... How?!"

Dark Mirror: "Thy soul... Is dark... Their soul is divine but impure... Their light is bright but tainted..."

Crowley: "Tainted?.... Could it be? Blot?"

Dark Mirror: "...This one possesses an art form of magic that is celestial, yet uses it for horrible intentions, throwing no caution of the power they hold..."

Azul, pushing his glasses up: "Celestial, you say?"

Idia: "Damn, this sounds like an anime scene."

Dark Mirror: "... The darkness in their soul has swallowed and layered their heart. Thus, they do not belong in any dorm."

[yandere-writer-momo]

Kinktober: Day 16

Pickle

Minors DNI

A hand job is an act of male masturbation, especially as performed on a man by someone else.

Grunt and groans filled the air. Your hands stroked up and down an uncut length that you could barely fit your hands around.

Tears fell down your eyes as you nervously glanced up at your prehistoric friend that had climbed into your room.

Pickle cooed and purred at you with a lopsided smile. His tongue out of his mouth while he lightly thrusted in your hands. His fat brown head came closer and closer to your lips every time. You tried not to throw up from the smell. This was not how you wanted to be woken up in the middle of the night…

Perhaps this was all your fault for feeding him and treating him like a pet. You ignored the danger this man presented to try to be a kind human being and look where that got you!

Here you were jerking him off like your life depended on it. Because it honestly did. You didn’t want him to impale you on his fun stick like a meat kebab. That was not something you wanted your family and friends to read as your cause of death.

You knew something of this sheer size would even fit in you, lest you wanted to never walk again. So you continued to run your soft palms up and down the girthy length. Your hands rub over each vein as his hips thrusted wildly in your hands.

You could tell he was close just by the way he became more sloppy with his hips. You were just terrified of what happened next. Would he cease his efforts or would he keep going?

You press and slide your thumbs over the slit of his cock at a steady pace. The prehistoric man moans loudly at the touch.

And without warning, thick viscous cum splattered all over your face, chest, and stomach. Pickle grunted in relief as he continued to cover you in thick ropes of cum with three more loads.

The cum dripped down your navel and onto the carpet of your bedroom floor. You sucked in a breath and sighed in relief. Thank goodness that was all over, now you could-

Pickle flops over and pulled your sticky body to his chest. The caveman purred in your ear with a lovesick smile, his tongue laps up some of the substance off your face.

Pickle nuzzled his face in the junction of your shoulder as he enjoyed the bliss of his orgasm.

It seemed the caveman had no intention of leaving your side tonight… just kidding. Pickle was never going to leave. He had finally found his lifetime mate.

[bridenore]

Author rec : Oflights

Oflights is one of my favorite authors. Here are a few recs, listed in alphabetical order.

all the western stars by @oflights [78k]

Draco is a Seer who has been struck with terrible, uncontrollable visions of the deaths of everyone around him, triggered by touch. He retreats to an Unplottable Black family cottage to research his condition and fix it. Things are going relatively well until Harry Potter shows up at the cottage with a furry condition of his own.

along each garden wall by @oflights [61k]

Draco has to have a baby (or have one on the way) at the time of his fast-approaching 35th birthday, or he's going to lose his home to his vile cousin. Harry offers to help, but their complex past—even beyond Hogwarts—prompts Draco to set out on a long journey of friendship, kittens, gardens, motorbike rides, and more.

Close Behind by @oflights [134k]

To rescue Draco from the Underworld, Harry has to look forward. Unfortunately, Draco has to look back.

Cool About It by @oflights [134k]

Harry is so excited for his first date with Draco. But what follows isn't so much a date as it is an all-night odyssey including a malevolent lift, a Gringotts heist, a Sleeping Curse, a trip to the kebab shop, a lack of dancing, a Muggle drug, a rooftop pool party, a black eye and, eventually, a sunrise over a Quidditch stadium.

find a new place to be from by @oflights [47k]

Something is wrong with Malfoy Manor, and it’s driven Draco into the Muggle world. Thankfully, Harry is now on the case. A story about houses that haunt you and homes built for two.

A Hundred Visions and Revisions by @oflights [11k]

Harry doesn’t really like remembering. As he’s grown older, he’s found that discovering or creating or even making things up are all much less painful than remembering.

if the bees know by @oflights [19k]

Scorpius’ playground is haunted, Harry specializes in helping ghosts pass on, and Draco just wants his son to be safe.

Make This Leap by @oflights [118k]

Harry owns a struggling restaurant which is running out of money, and his Head Chef has just handed in notice. He's at a bit of a loss as to what to do until Narcissa Malfoy presents an obvious solution: bring in Draco Malfoy as Chef and part owner. Harry does.

On Fingers Broken Long Ago by @oflights [85k+]

After a ten year absence, Harry returns to his old life in England to find Draco Malfoy at the center of it. A tale of rekindling old flames, unlikely inter-House alliances, angry Hufflepuffs, and medical mysteries ensues. Bound to Linger by @oflights [20k+] Sequel to On Fingers Broken Long Ago; Draco is campaigning for a board seat, Harry still hates Zacharias, and a dragon pox outbreak hits the second floor staff, so nobody has time for anything. Oh, and then there's maple syrup. Tunnel by @oflights [15k+] Sequel to On Fingers Broken Long Ago; see notes and warnings for more details. A history of loss makes Draco fear the future, even the golden one he sees with Harry.

The Star Splitter by @oflights [219k]

On a routine time travel assignment to the past, Draco stumbles upon 7-year-old Harry Potter and witnesses his neglect and mistreatment by the Dursleys. In the moment, there is only one solution, even if it goes against all his training as a Time Agent: he has to bring Harry back to the future with him. In which Draco burns his life down for the sake of his former school rival.

we have heard on high by @oflights [34k]

Reeling from the fallout of a bad breakup, Harry decides to find out who his soulmate is. The bad news: it’s Draco Malfoy. The good news: Malfoy doesn’t seem to know they’re soulmates. The worst news: Harry might be falling for him anyway.

I hope you enjoy these stories as much as I did!

[glowingvoid]

RAIN WORLD SHIPPING MASTERLIST

Since I am the Sunflower CEO, and I have... *Checks* 74 FOLLOWERS WHAT I decided to make a rain world shipping name masterlist. You can suggest in comments or reblogs. All the names are listed from most common > least common in general, but this isn't a strict rule, some I see equally used. Unique names usually rank higher than two names smashed together, but there are some cases where the two names smashed together roll off the tongue very good

Normal names are used by one/a couple people, Italicized names are used by/decided by a section of the community, and bolded names have been decided and used for a long time/I don't see any other names for them anymore/very common

Reblogs greatly appreciated!

Survivor ships

Survivor X Spearmaster: Glowstick, Spearvivor

Survivor X Artificer: Red Velvet , Survificer

Survivor X Hunter: Candycane

Survivor X Gourmand: Marshmallow, Gourvivor

Survivor X Rivulet: Tapwater, Survulet

Survivor X Saint: Sugarcane

Survivor X Enot: Reversal

Survivor X Nightcat: Nightlight

Monk ships

Monk X Spearmaster: Sunflower, Cheesestick, Spearmonk

Monk X Artificer: Sunset, Sunnyside up, ArtiMonk

Monk X Hunter: Applejuice

Monk X Gourmand: Eggroll

Monk X Rivulet: Lemonade, Lemonshark, Bananaboat, Rivumonk

Monk X Saint: Peacemakers, Banana split, Saintmonk

Monk X Enot: Nacho cheese, Omelette

Monk X Nightcat: Eclipse, Monknight

Hunter ships

Hunter X Spearmaster: Loveletter

Hunter X Artficer: Artihunter, Cherrybomb, Murder lesbians

Hunter X Gourmand: Cherrypie, Huntmand

Hunter X Survivor: Candycane

Hunter X Monk: Applejuice

Hunter X Rivulet: Pirahna, Rivunter, Sharkbait

Hunter X Saint: Cherrybush, Strawberry, Huntersaint

Hunter X Enot: Counterstrike

Hunter X Nightcat: Bloodmoon

Gourmand ships

Gourmand X Spearmaster: Kebab, Spearmand

Gourmand X Artificer: Barbeque, Artimand

Gourmand X Hunter: Cherrypie

Gourmand X Survivor: Marshmallow, Gourvivor

Gourmand X Monk: Eggroll

Gourmand X Rivulet: Seafood, Fastfood, Titanic

Gourmand X Saint: Puffball, Fat blunt, Mossball

Gourmand X Enot: Omelette, Gourmenot

Gourmand X Nightcat: Full moon, Midnight Snack

Artificer ships

Artificer X Spearmaster: Boomstick, Death notice, Sparklers, Spearificer, explosive spear

Artificer X Artificer: Timebomb

Artificer X Hunter: Artihunter, Cherrybomb, Murder lesbians

Artificer X Gourmand: Barbeque, Artigourm

Artificer X Survivor: Red Velvet

Artificer X Monk: Sunset, Sunnyside up, ArtiMonk

Artificer X Rivulet: Bathbomb, Toasterbath

Artificer X Saint: Artisaint, Karmaflower, Deathpop

Artificer X Enot: Paprika, Pipebomb, Zip bomb

Artificer X Nightcat: Bloodmoon

Rivulet ships

Rivulet X Spearmaster: Fishstick, Spearvulet

Rivulet X Artificer: Bathbomb, Toasterbath

Rivulet X Hunter: Pirahna, Rivunter, Sharkbait

Rivulet X Gourmand: Seafood, Fastfood, Titanic

Rivulet X Survivor: Tapwater, Survulet

Rivulet X Monk: Lemonade, Lemonshark, Bananaboat, Rivumonk

Rivulet X Saint: Seaweed, Icee, Rivusaint, Holy water

Rivulet X Enot: Speedrun, Blueberry

Rivulet X Nightcat: Starfish, Lanternfish, Abyssal zone

Spearmaster ships

Spearmaster X Artificer: Boomstick, Death notice, Sparklers, Spearificer, Explosive spear

Spearmaster X Hunter: Loveletter

Spearmaster X Gourmand: Kebab, Spearmand

Spearmaster X Survivor: Glowstick, Spearvivor

Spearmaster X Monk: Sunflower, Cheesestick, Spearmonk

Spearmaster X Rivulet: Fishstick, Spearvulet

Spearmaster X Saint: Spearmint, Thornbush

Spearmaster X Enot: Lagspike

Spearmaster X Nightcat: Inkblot

Saint ships

Saint X Spearmaster: Spearmint, Thornbush

Saint X Artificer: Artisaint, Karmaflower, Deathpop

Saint X Hunter: Cherrybush, Strawberry, Huntersaint

Saint X Gourmand: Puffball, Fat blunt, Mossball

Saint X Survivor: Sugarcane

Saint X Monk: Peacemakers, Banana split, Saintmonk

Saint X Rivulet: Seaweed, Icee, Rivusaint, Holy water

Saint X Enot: Godmode

Saint X Nightcat: Holy night

Enot ships

Enot X Spearmaster: Lagspike

Enot X Artificer: Paprika, Pipebomb, Zip bomb

Enot X Hunter: Counterstrike

Enot X Gourmand: Omelette, Gourmenot

Enot X Survivor: Reversal

Enot X Monk: Nacho Cheese, Omelette

Enot X Rivulet: Speedrun, Blueberry

Enot X Saint: Godmode

Enot X Nightcat: Error 404

Nightcat Ships

Nightcat X Spearmaster: Inkblot

Nightcat X Artificer: Bloodmoon

Nightcat X Hunter: Bloodmoon

Nightcat X Gourmand: Full Moon, Midnight Snack

Nightcat X Survivor: Nightlight

Nightcat X Monk: Eclipse, Monknight

Nightcat X Rivulet: Starfish, Lanternfish, Abyssal zone

Nightcat X Saint: Holy Night

Nightcat X Enot: Error 404

ITERATOR TIME

Five Pebbles ships

FP X NSH: Ragequit

FP X SRS: Sunstone

FP X GCW: Hailstorm

FP X UI: Milkshake

FP X SOS: Gravel, Faulty affirmative

Looks to the Moon ships

LttM X LttM: Sunken ship

LttM X NSH: Lilypad, Lifeline

LttM X SRS: Eclipse

LttM X GCW: Atmosphere

LttM X UI: Pluto

LttM X SOS: Waning Crescent

No Significant Harassment ships

NSH X LttM: Lilypad, Lifeline

NSH X FP: Ragequit

NSH X SRS: Trafficlights

NSH X GCW: Hurricane

NSH X UI: Team Rocket

NSH X SOS: Taboo Dissonance

Seven Red Suns ships

SRS X LttM: Eclipse

SRS X NSH: Trafficlights

SRS X FP: Sunstone

SRS X GCW: Solar flare

SRS X UI: (unknown, please give name!)

SRS X SOS: Gold Pearl

Grey/Chasing Wind ships

GCW X FP: Hailstorm

GCW X LttM: Atmosphere

GCW X NSH: Hurricane

GCW X SRS: Solar Flare

GCW X UI: Morally gray, Gray area, Content warning user interface

GCW X SOS: (unknown, please give name!)

Unparalled Innocence ships

UI X FP: Milkshake

UI X LttM: Pluto

UI X SRS: (unknown, please give name!)

UI X NSH: Team Rocket

UI X GCW: Morally gray, Gray area, Content warning user interface

UI X SOS (unknown, please give name!)

Sliver of Straw ships

SOS X LttM: Waning Crescent

SOS X FP: Gravel, Faulty affirmative

SOS X SRS: Gold Pearl

SOS X NSH: Taboo Dissonance

SOS X GCW: (unknown, please give name!)

SOS X UI: (unknown, please give name!)

MISCELLANEOUS

Scavenger King X Artificer: Regicide

Scavenger King X Gourmand: Shared union

Scavenger King X Artificer X Gourmand: Caramelized onions

Scavenger King X Artificer X Hunter: Triple red, Triple threat

Sofantheil X Scavenger King's drone: Droning love

Hornet (hollow knight) X LttM: Lunar Constellation

Scavenger King X Saint: Theocracy

Judge X Saint: Judgement day

Judge X Hunter: Cured

POLYAMOROUS SHIPS

Threes

Artificer X Nightcat X Monk: Firefly

Spearmaster X Monk X Saint: Beetsalad

Artificer X Hunter X Rivulet: Cherry soda, Seabomb, Missile

Artificer X Hunter X Spearmaster: Killsquad

Artificer X Rivulet X Spearmaster: Ultrakill, Trident

Saint X Spearmaster X Gourmand: Incense stick

Survivor X Enot X Nightcat: Oreo Sundae, Aurora

Artificer X Rivulet X Monk: Lemonicetea

Saint X Monk X Rivulet: Angelfish

Hunter X Monk X Rivulet: Pink Lemonade

Hunter X Gourmand X Spearmaster: Comfort food

Spearmaster X Nightcat X Rivulet: Stargazers

Spearmaster X Monk X Rivulet: Spring flowers

Spearmaster X Artificer X Saint: Dangocats

Enot X Survivor X Rivulet: any% nmg

Inv x Spearmaster x Rivulet: Conspearacy

Hunter X Spearmaster X Rivulet: Pufferfish

Artificer X Rivulet X Saint: Deathsea

Gourmand X Saint X Hunter: Bell peppers

SOS X NSH X LttM: Green tea

FP X SRS X NSH: Triple divorce, Five triple pickle

SRS X LttM X NSH: Mossy Cobblestone

Fours

Artificer X Saint X Spearmaster X Monk: Candlelight

Artificer X Hunter X Spearmaster X Rivulet: Shark-infested waters

More poly ships to be added!

[carionto]

Steady as she goes, nature has finally caught up

War.

A seemingly inescapable aspect of any civilization. Perhaps even a prerequisite for it.

It was as sudden as it was inevitable. The United Federation utilized certain ideas introduced and executed by Humanity to their logical continuation. Their horrendous Battle Moon - an actual, small moon converted into a semi-moveable, heavily shielded, and maximally armed military installation, with a military-civilian population in the hundreds of thousands.

They used it as a torpedo.

Knowing that the Death Kebab was directly inspired by their own creation, itself a product of fear and need for control, the Federation strapped a few massive hyperdrives instead of the much easier to produce several hundred standard-sized ones to ease the computational synchronization, and using the Hyperbreak technique, they jumped into the middle of Death Kebab's main rail gun. An impressive feat of precision.

Almost as impressive as the ensuing destruction.

How do you even relay when the mass of an entire planetoid suddenly appears in the middle of three slightly larger moons strapped together? The grotesque expansion from within, quickly followed by massive cracks in the crust, an expulsion of the mantle and finally, the explosions.

One faulty first generation Human True Fusion Reactor from 700 years ago created a 200km massive hole in the Earth. Only one of the moons reached that in diameter.

These were hundreds of military grade reactors powering a gun that can obliterate small planets in one shot.

Seven failed to engage their failsafes in time.

There was nothing left.

Nothing, but a cloud of searing ash where four moons and hundreds of ships and thousands of crew used to be.

Humanity was thrust into war.

And they looked excited.

Of course, they mourned the dead, and were rightfully enraged, but there was a glint in the Grand Admiral's eye.

"The Federation really surprised us here. Fooled our intelligence operatives outright. We were not expecting them to act for at least another year, certainly not sacrifice their precious Battle Moon.

Now, we knew they'd target the Death Kebab sooner or later. Truth be told, that's partly why it was built. Sure, it was a fine strategic asset, far from our most important ones though, but as a symbolic one it was priceless. Biggest weapon in the known Galaxy! Who wouldn't be tempted by the glory of taking it down.

I say let them. They want to rule through fear and power, and Humanity, or "upstarts" as they call us behind closed doors, provided a perfect boogeyman to scare the masses into obedience. We have our own history with regimes like that. Personally, not a fan.

The Federation is large, powerful, foreign, and far from Earth, but, well, my ancestors were never stopped by such things. In fact, expansion at great risk is what we're great at.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Retribution Fleet to assemble."

[midnightwriter21]

demon slayer hcs: how you meet

characters: fem!reader x douma, akaza, sanemi

warnings: language, mention of death, blood, fighting, and attempted sexual assault

DOUMA

douma prefers women

thinks we're ~tasty~

so ur probably out for the night with your girlfriends

havin a lil bit of fun

and unfortunately or fortunately

y'all catch his attention

but he doesn't just swoop in and fuck yall up dw

he's a curious fucker

so he jus watches for a while

mans can watch me for as long as he wants yk what im sayin ;)

anyways

you and your friends run into some trouble

idk what trouble

but trouble

and douma with his bullshit manipulative fake hero complex

waits until the LASTTTTT second

to finally pop in and save you

of course you're terrified of him

he doesn't care

you're going with him

and he's gonna keep you for as long as he wants

hopefully you can keep him entertained ;)

AKAZA

the man i hate to love

rip rengoku :(

similar to douma

except akaza drinks respect women juice for breakfast, lunch, and dinner

so ur out for a night on the town w ur besties

and the trouble you guys run into happens to be group of drunk men

they're aggressive and loud

and even when y'all tell them to fuck off

they dont

they just get rougher

but akaza being the man he is

doesn't let them get the CHANCE to lay a finger on you or your friends

necks broken

spines snapped

and ur just like "wtf jus happened"

def still scared as hell

but he's ur savior

show him ur appreciation *wink wink*

asks if you'll become a demon

if u accept, he'll help you adjust

teach you to fight

if you don't accept

he won't give u any trouble

if he likes u enough he may vow to protect u

love him

SANEMI

idk its jus somethin abt this man

ik he would tear it UP

anyway for him i hc that you would already be a demon slayer yourself

not too highly ranked but you're not a beginner either

you're kinda just eh

but you're on a mission with some other demon slayers

and uh oh

big bad strong demon

sanemi is sent out due to the large amount of casualties

and there you are

with a group of injured slayers to the left of you

and you're holding off the demon

alone

covered in blood

and def terrified

but fighting like hell

when the demon shifts his attention to that group of injured slayers

it shoots toward them and you don't have time to think

throwing urself in front of them and closing ur eyes

bracing for impact

and instead of being shish-kebabed

all you feel is a gust of wind

but then u hear it

"fucking idiot"

yo what

lmfao not what u expected for sure

the demon that was terrorizing u is light work for him

but sanemi was actually impressed that you held out long enough for him to get there

he wont show it but he respects the way you were gonna give your life to protect the injured slayers

he'll cuss you out the whole way back to the butterfly mansion

but maybe he'll offer to train you

sheeshhh ik a way we could train hehe

[navalie]

now that I'm thinking, I'm starting to realize the death pattern in SBG...

For example, the day before Tyler is inevitably skewered like a kebab, we are first introduced to his mother and "father".

Not to say much, but for Aiden as well. The family portrait that showed a glimpse of his past was also a night before his untimely death.

Now with the new episodes talking about Logan's grandparents and more backstory about theirs and his past, do you think Logan...

[hapless-and-hopeless]

Being a Magnus Archives/Protocol fan living in London is so funny.

My favourite pub is the last stop off before horrible death on the tube.

A guy was apprehended in a Breakon and Hope van full of explosives along my jogging route.

The music venue I was singing Mr Brightside in last week was a potential site of an alchemical ritual based around the millennium.

It’s just not creepy when you can shout ‘I know that kebab shop!’

[artist-issues]

Can we talk about the climax of The Little Mermaid?

I would like to point another thing out that I noticed on my rewatch.

The ship that Eric uses to shish-kebab Ursula IS the ship that Ariel is exploring in the beginning of the movie.

The ship that she explored instead of going to her musical celebration.

The ship that led her to go to the surface and get yelled at by her dad.

Her dad, who believes she should have let Eric drown because it would be "one less human (spineless savage harpooning fish-eater barbarians) to worry about."

Her dad, who understands at the end of the film that Ariel loves Eric, and was right to do so, because he just saw how Eric saved his daughter in the face of impossible odds and bear certain death, even though she's a mermaid.

It is very important that Eric save the day, USING the ship that symbolized Ariel's belief in the beauty of the human world and willingness to sacrifice and take risks to explore it.

Because it's Eric's heroism that convinces Triton that Ariel's love is as real as her beliefs about humanity. It's no longer a silly teenage girl who's lost her senses about a boy and is too naive to make the right decisions. It's a teenage girl who believed in the possibility that not all humans are barbarians, and some are worth loving--and she was right. And Triton needed to SEE THAT.

If Ariel saves herself, all that would prove to Triton is that she can handle the consequences of her own actions. But if Eric saves Ariel, it proves to Triton that humans can be good and Ariel's choice to love one was real and true.

That is very important. And a pretty amazing way to show it, having Eric stab Ursula with the shipwreck.