#dancing kisame
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soleberlandieri · 1 year ago
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erimeows · 2 months ago
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Naruto: Masterlist
Hi there! I'm Eri, and I write for all sorts of stuff. While I do have everything published on here, I personally choose to have my masterlists linked to my Ao3.
Most of my stuff is written during the original Naruto-Naruto Shippuden era. I do have a couple works set during Boruto, but I don't write the new gen characters and haven't watched the show (I thought it sucked but no judgment to anyone who enjoys it). Some of these are NSFW, so be sure to check the tags!
If you'd like to learn more about me, send in a request, or look at my works for other fandoms, check out my pinned post!
Multichapter/Series:
Compromise (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)- Pt. 1, Pt. 2
Verbatim (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
I Like You (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Candy Hearts (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Lavender Clouds (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Shared Custody (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
To Be Alive At All Is To Have Scars (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Red (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
New Relationship Energy- Pt. 1, Pt. 2
Candy (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Holding Hands (Gaara x Reader)
The New Member (Various Akatsuki x Reader): Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 3
Character x Character Oneshots:
Teardrops (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Antagonistic (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Like Lovers Do (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
The Moth And The Flame (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Under The Mask (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Then, There's You (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Plus One (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Monster (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Hush Hush (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Teachers (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Friday Nights (Kakashi Hatake x Iruka Umino)
Wanted (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Slow Dancing In The Dark (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Cracks (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Always (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Ruin My Life (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
First Times (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Take Care (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Lovesick (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Rainy Days (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Like This (Kakashi Hatake x Might Guy)
Stupid (Kakashi Hatake x Anko Mitarashi)
Obvious (Kakashi Hatake x Anko Mitarashi)
Control (Kakashi Hatake x Yamato)
Home (Kakashi Hatake x Yamato)
Polaroid (Kakashi Hatake x Yamato)
Us (Kakashi Hatake x Yamato)
Snowfall (Kakashi Hatake x Yamato + Sai x Ino Yamanaka)
Groomsmen (Iruka Umino x Yamato)
Casual (Kakashi Hatake x Mei Terumi)
Break-Ups (Kakashi Hatake x Minato Namikaze)
Twilight (Kakashi Hatake x Obito Uchiha)
Against His Better Judgment (Kakashi Hatake x Obito Uchiha)
Not Anymore (Kakashi Hatake x Obito Uchiha)
Still Missing (Sasuke Uchiha x Sakura Haruno)
The Game That We Play (Sasuke Uchiha x Naruto Uzumaki)
Rising Action (Shikamaru Nara x Naruto Uzumaki)
Love Strategist (Shikamaru Nara x Ino Yamanaka)
Perfume (Shikamaru Nara x Temari)
Memento Mori (Shikamaru Nara x Temari)
When The Smoke Clears (Deidara x Sasori)
Complications (Deidara x Itachi Uchiha)
Sapphire & Gold (Kisame Hoshigaki x Itachi Uchiha)
Ten Years (Gaara x Rock Lee)
Single (Kankuro x Kiba Inuzuka)
Character x Reader Oneshots:
Hair (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
When I Wake (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Pink Bubblegum (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Exes (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Jealous (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Too Good To Be True (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Cat & Mouse (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
To Be Selfish (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Self Conscious (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Not Anymore (Kakashi Hatake x Reader)
Moonlight (Gaara x Reader)
My Queen (Yamato x Reader)
Who? (Might Guy x Reader)
Waiting Game (Neji Hyuga x Reader)
The Diary (Rock Lee x Reader)
Scary (Temari x Reader)
Truth Or Dare (Shikamaru x Reader)
Bloody Valentine (Obito Uchiha x Reader)
Rain (Iruka Umino x Reader)
Headcanons:
Kankuro NSFW Alphabet
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spiderlilydreams · 11 months ago
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You Meet Some Naruto Men At a Underground Club
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MINORS DO NOT INTERRACT
Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, drugs, sexual themes, some smut but not that descriptive, one of the short fics has mentions of sexual harassment that goes along with the fic, but it's from a random character, not the character that the short fic is about
[Itachi, Sasuke, Naruto, Kakashi, Sasori, Kisame, Deidera]
Itachi -
You were dancing on the dance floor with your friends, swaying your hips to every beat perfectly. The thundering music pulsed through you, and the lights perfectly decorated your body. You glimpsed at the eyes around you, two deep black eyes catching your attention. His features were serious and mature, a shot in his hand, him watching you dance, while sipping the drink slowly. The more you watched him, in a trance, the more interested he got in you. He approached you on the dancefloor, handsome and tall before you. He swayed with you for a bit, before asking you if you wanted him to take you on an actual date. He'd be big on asking if you trust him, and after agreeing, and telling your friends, he'd grab your hand and swiftly navigate you through the crowd of dancing people. He drives a luxurious car, and the city lights would illuminate you both as he drove, him looking so handsome driving with his elegant hands, with painted fingernails and rings. He'd take you out to a five star restaurant, letting you eat whatever you desire, paying for it all. Eventually you'd end up at his apartment, a penthouse apartment on the top floor of a skyscraper. It has huge windows that reach the floor around you, so you feel like you're on top of the world. Everything is modern, dimly lit in the apartment. When you'd eventually end up in bed with Itachi, the cityscape in view beside you, he'd be gentle and intimate with you. He'd leave small kisses all over your body, you both touching each other like it's your first time touching another person, out of awe with each other, like you're both artwork worthy of high praise. You'd make slow, passionate love, with orgasms you'd be entranced with lights from the city tickling your vision.
Sasuke -
You'd want to take a break from the dance floor, opening random doors, looking for a private room to decompress. One of the rooms you'd open, you'd see a handsome man, sitting on the large crimson couch to himself. You'd try to leave but before you do, the man would almost demand you join him. When you do, he motions for you to sit on his lap, but is big on telling you only if you feel comfortable doing so. You'd sit on his lap, feeling his toned body press up against you. His dark eyes staring deeply into you, making you blush and nervous. You'd both just talk for a bit, him wondering why you came to the room he's in, and you wondering the same. You'd learn he came for his friends, but isn't big on parties or anything like that. The more you'd both talk, the closer your bodies would get to each other, eventually you both melting into a passionate, aggressive kiss, you both ripping each other's clothes off. Sasuke would waste no time, pounding into you roughly, you both riding a intense high. For the rest of the night, you'd spend it with Sasuke. You'd chat, share stories, but most of all, have multiple rounds of intense sex, fucking like this is the last time either of you would have sex.
Naruto -
You were apart of a large truth or dare game, a large crowd gathering around you. One of the random drunks would dare you to kiss Naruto, Naruto blushing and saying over and over that you didn't have to. You'd come over to him, Naruto stuttering and obviously very nervous. You'd pull him into a long, firey kiss, that Naruto would immediately respond to, both of your tongues battling. You'd end up pushing one another onto one of the couches, grinding and making out like wild animals, people shocked around you. You both wouldn't mind, feeling like the only thing that existed, was both of you sharing this moment. Loud music would vibrate both of you, lights blinding everything. You both would be so lost in the passion, nothing else seeming to exist. As people would start passing out from drugs and alcohol, you'd both still be making out, even sneaking in some quick sex, no one around you knowing, you both too dazed in lust even if they did.
Kakashi -
You noticed him the moment you entered the club, him tall and handsome amongst people you payed no interest in. All that mattered to you was him. He was working at the bar. You'd immediately sit at the bar, asking for a drink he recommended. He'd make your drink with a wink with his uncovered eye. You'd stare at him as he worked, noticing he was only flirting with you. After a couple hours of the intense flirting, he'd pretend he couldn't hear you asking a question, leaning in to "hear" you better. You'd blush, beginning to repeat yourself, before he'd remove the bottom of his mask, pulling you into a kiss. You'd pull him in close, but he'd pull you in even closer. You'd eventually end up sitting on the bar table, making out intensely with Kakashi, him gripping your hips, and holding you close to him. You both payed no mind as people frowned and got angry, you both still making out hungrily. Eventually he'd lift you up, carrying you to the bathroom, but not bringing you to a stall out of respect, sitting you up on the sink counter instead. You'd both begin stripping crazily, having rough sex on the sink, Kakashi smirking in the bathroom mirror everytime he'd see his reflection and pound into you. You'd spend the rest of the night in the bathroom with Kakashi, you both having ownership of the bathroom basically, people refusing to use it because of the intense sex you both were having.
Sasori -
The loud music was getting to you, you taking a break on one of the couches. Your friends payed no mind, still dancing to themselves. You'd begin feeling a panic attack coming, looking to the ground, covering your ears desperately with your hands. Then you felt someone tapping you on the shoulder. A handsome man standing there with red hair. He'd join you on the couch, offering you headphones he pulls out of his bag that he brought. You'd accept them with thankfulness, noticing the headphones are noise canceling to a degree when you put them on. Sasori would smile, and bring out something else from his bag. Fingerpuppets? He'd begin pretending the fingerpuppets were dancing, obviously trying to cheer you up. You'd be giggling and thankful. Eventually he'd offer you a fingerpuppet, you both pretending they were slow dancing. People would look at you both weirded out, but you both didn't care. As the night carried on, you'd both get to know each other through texting each other right next to each other. Sasori would text asking for a kiss innocently, obviously very nervous as he typed. You'd both exchange a delicate kiss that led into a more passionate, but gentle kiss, you both lost in your own little world.
Kisame -
Kisame was working as the security guard of the club, big and tall, intimidating to the club goers. He'd stand against the wall next to the entrance, observing in case all hell broke loose. He'd notice you on the dancefloor, looking scared as a tall, lanky man who looked like a snake followed you throughout the dancefloor. When the man began to grind his body against yours, Kisame rushed through the crowd, standing tall behind the man. You looked scared, tears welling up in your eyes, as Kisame pushed the creepy man to the floor. You stood there speechless, as you watched Kisame crouch down to be eye level with you, telling you, you're safe now, and that he's looking out for you. For the rest of the night, instead of being on the dancefloor, you stood nearby to where Kisame was perched, him keeping watch, every once in awhile peering over to smile at you. The gentle giant even ordered you what you found out to be hot chocolate instead of alcohol, because you were shivering a bit from the cold. He'd also offer you his large jacket afterwards, you drowning in the warm fabric, sipping the hot cocoa. You watched the club with Kisame, noticing his large muscles in his exposing t-shirt, thinking about how gentle he is.
Deidara -
Deidara was working as one of the main djs for the night, him illuminated by the blinding lights, loud music pounding away onto the dancefloor. Deidara shone up there, his positive aura infecting the dancefloor. He took notice in you, standing the closest to him upfront, shaking your hips and shaking your succulent ass. Deidara was starstruck by you, purposefully picking higher and higher pace music, to watch you keep up so masterfully with the music. During his break, he watched you stop dancing, going to get a drink. He came up behind you, beginning to talk with you at the bar. You blushed as you praised his skills, Deidara beaming from your praise. Deidara when going back to dj would bring you up with him, him offering you headphones for the noise, you sitting on his lap. You watched him masterfully using his hands, as the music vibrated you on his lap. You melted against him, feeling so special in that moment. Deidara would begin to dj with one hand, no one on the dancefloor paying notice, too entranced by the music. Deidara would tease your body, until eventually touching you to the point of your orgasm, you becoming undone in front of thousands, not one person noticing, as you rode your high with heavy music tingling your body, Deidara smiling from ear to ear at your orgasm.
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sakuhannah · 3 months ago
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itachi: where’s kisame?
deidara: o-on the dance floor..
kisame:
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imagineakatsuki · 2 months ago
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what sports would the akatsuki members like/be good at??
Pein/Nagato: tennis, chess, billiards
Konan: pole vault, volleyball, speed skating
Deidara: rock climbing, ski jumping, skydiving, parkour
Sasori: gymnastics, figure skating, chess, dance
Itachi: trapeze, table tennis, archery, fencing
Kisame: swimming, surfing, triathlon
Hidan: wrestling, rallying (and other motorsports)
Kakuzu: shooting, weightlifting, shot put, pickleball
Obito: hockey, football, boxing
Zetsu: dodgeball, fishing, hunting
Admin S
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mixelation · 6 months ago
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'your made up langauge' 'SPANISH???' is so fucking funny to me lmao. sorry tori this entire fuckin planet is monolingual outside of code! whoops
i can't make this joke about english within the text because i don't have an explanation for why everyone understands each other. however what if people just don't know other languages exist except maybe, like, ancient ones
tori, drunk out of her mind, dancing in a corner: yo perreo sola~~
kisame: see?! she speaks in tongues when she's drunk
itachi: please be more considerate, kisame. this is probably a piece of ancient poetry of extreme cultural importance
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nightofhappylight · 10 months ago
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Initially just wanted to draw Sasori and Kisame in their respective villages' standard uniform.
...And now there's a whole idea for a fanfic, so here's a short one of GuardianNinja!Akatsuki AU.
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Snow Country Reading Club
Sasori hates waiting.
Not that he would go on a frustrated, genocidal mass-killing over waiting for a few minutes or anything, but if any of the idiots don’t arrive soon—or worse, if they change shifts without informing him—then there’s no telling what his smallest, mostly harmless doll he’s now fiddling with would do.
Flicking a finger, Sasori absently watches as the doll picks up a stick and starts to draw something on the ground. Not quite distracting enough, he makes it take up a stick on each limb and do a weird, half-remembered imitation of Suna’s traditional fan dance. If he cares enough, there’s a faint laugh he can hear from inside the big, heavily guarded building some meters away from where he’s sitting. He looks down and sighs.
Just fifteen more minutes. He would ditch the idiots if they don’t come after that.
༄ ༄ ༄
Deidara, for the umpteenth time, curses the ancient Tsuchikage for making him put up with this.
The job pays well, yes. And he is qualified, certainly.
But does he care? No, not really. Feudal Lords can do anything and Deidara would pay not even a quarter of shit to it. Their orders are shinobi’s main source of income but Deidara prefers the messy, explosive kind to the boring, tasteless, mind-numbing ones, like body-guarding.
He doesn’t have a choice, though. Not if he doesn’t want to get in another trouble with the old old man. Besides, it’s better than desk jobs, he guesses (because sage forbids he has to sit and write and think), and he gets to switch and take a break for a few hours to do whatever he wants.
…He just hopes a certain redhead wouldn’t stick a poisonous needle in him or something, though, because his shift lasting for one more hour is not his fault.
༄ ༄ ༄
When Kisame comes to their usual secret-but-not-really place, he is in a fairly cheery mood.
After seeing the familiar redhead, though, there’s something concerningly similar to fear—and morbid curiosity—that makes him blink.
“Uh” he starts, eloquently, “Where are the others?” because he’s usually the last one to arrive but there’s no blond or raven in sight.
Sasori looks downright pissed—Kisame wonders why the guy’s still there—and levels him with a look, “Who fucking knows.”
Oh. Wow. Okay.
Whistling a random, carefully low tune, Kisame sits a few feet from the puppeteer, “There’s a change in the Lightning’s Guardians, I heard.”
That, thankfully, gets the redhead’s attention.
“Who died?”
Kisame snorts, “Nah, just resigned, I think. It’s Dodai-san”
“The rubber guy” Sasori recognizes, “He is old, I guess.”
Kisame thinks about how Sasori is pretty old himself—despite his very misleading looks—and keeps the thought to himself. He glances to the windows of the building that currently holds the nations’ Feudal Lords, chuckles at how constipated Deidara had looked and faintly wonders why the convoy from Fire hasn’t arrived yet.
༄ ༄ ༄
When Itachi appears, it’s a day later than the schedule and he is greeted by a whole sour mood that turns off like a light the second he steps onto their self-claimed patch of clearing.
“Hey, Itachi-san” Kisame greets, a hand in a lazy wave, and Itachi follows the Kiri nin’s gaze and blinks at a raised eyebrow.
Ah. Right, he hasn’t had time to change yet.
“There was some trouble on the way” he explains, which is a normal occurrence, really—Feudal Lords eat assassination attempts for breakfast—but there has been a little more effort in the last couple times, “Asuma-san’s team is currently acting as decoy and we went here undercover.”
(Not that Itachi would say it out loud, but he is forever grateful the Fire’s Lord is mostly a chill guy and is fine with their modus operandi, however questionable it can be).
Vainly tapping his flak jacket to at least dust some dried red, Itachi takes a seat on the ground where Deidara is patting enthusiastically.
“We were talking about the Lightning new guy, yeah.”
“Darui-san?”
“What – you already knew??”
Itachi nods, pulling out a gray-bound scroll and a soft-cover book and thumping them on top of the other ones piled on a relatively cleaner spot, “Hokage-sama told me.”
Deidara rolls his eyes, “Of course he would, yeah” he says and goes to mutter something about blonds and old mans and retirement.
Kisame smirks, eyes alight in humor “Good for you, Itachi-san. Yagura-sama prefers his subordinates having surprises.”
“That’s because Kiri nin would die if you don’t get anything exciting happening for more than twenty minutes—”
“Hey! The one who had a rampage on a ‘seemingly empty desert’ doesn’t get to talk!”
“I’m not the one with the huge-ass, chakra-eating sword—”
Itachi snorts softly, taking one random book and flipping it open. Ah, a general history of the Stone’s alliance with Grass. He has read about it in Konoha’s archive, but having another point of view wouldn’t hurt.
“How old is the guy anyway?” Deidara asks by way of redirecting the topic because Sasori is now starting to bring up their tardiness.
“Young.”
“Younger than Itachi was?”
“No one is younger than Itachi was when he first joined.”
“…Fair. Younger than Deidara?”
“No, a little older,” a pause, “Acts ten years more than his age, though.”
They each grab a book or a scroll, a comment slipping here and there, and soon they’re sitting in a semi-circle, silent, each reading one thing or another.
“…We could invite the guy some time” Kisame says some half an hour into the silence, page opened on a certain kata illustration. (…So that’s why he has been… weirdly moving his hands about.)
“I’m fine with that, yeah” Deidara nonchalantly agrees, already on his third book and flipping many pages all at once and stopping randomly to read “Hey, somebody gotta teach me this one!”
Itachi glances at the pointed passage. A chakra control exercise. …Hmm.
“I could show an example” he offers, before looking at Sasori, “Unless Sasori-san is willing to demonstrate it” because the book is from Suna, after all. Said puppeteer just waves a dismissive hand, eyes still focused on an old, fraying scroll pertaining… Kiri’s desserts?
Deidara shoves the book into his hands. The raven reads the page once again to make sure of the theory and starts channeling it into practice. Brown and black dust falls from the hem of his sleeves and he glances forward as he feels the other half of Konoha’s convoy arriving and getting into the building.
It would be his shift in a couple hours, but for now, he is content to enjoy his break with some company.
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shadow-bringer-ao3 · 4 months ago
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How to Save the World by Hatake Kakashi
It all starts when, for the first time since he lost his team, Hatake Kakashi shows up precisely on time for a meeting. The Sandaime Hokage, who has grown used to his current most skilled shinobi being an upwards of three hours late most days, had not actually been prepared for Kakashi to slip through his window at exactly seven, landing without a sound just inside the room before wandering over to his desk.
He looks more tired than usual, Hiruzen notes, not even making an attempt to hide his weariness. It bodes ill, he thinks. Last time Kakashi had looked like this, he had taken so many S-rank missions back to back that Hiruzen had had to put him on guard duty to get him to rest. This doesn’t feel quite the same but he can’t help but think it’s no better.
“Hokage-sama,” Kakashi greets.
“You’re early,” is all Hiruzen can think to say for a moment. Kakashi hums, rolling his shoulders in the approximation of a shrug.
“I had a nightmare,” Kakashi says lightly. Hiruzen blinks, surprised that the man would be so candid— “You see, the moon came down and it told me ‘Kakashi, one day you’ll be the Rokudaime Hokage’ and then it started dancing with Uchiha Madara except Madara had Hashirama-sama’s face on his chest.” Ah. Well, that kind of excuse is certainly more in line with how Kakashi usually acts even if it makes Hiruzen more concerned for how the man’s mind works.
“Is that so.” Hiruzen carefully makes sure his voice is nowhere near questioning. Kakashi nods gamely anyway, his visible eye curling into a smile that gives Hiruzen a bad feeling.
“Mhm but that’s not all the moon told me,” Kakashi says cheerfully.
When it’s clear his shinobi is expecting some sort of response, Hiruzen responds blandly with, “how intriguing.” Kakashi leans forward conspiratorially and, despite himself, Hiruzen copies the movement.
“It also told me…” Kakashi pauses dramatically before saying, “that I must go soul-searching.” Hiruzen blinks at the Hatake before mechanically dropping his blank gaze to the hitai-ate slid across his desk. Hiruzen looks slowly back up at Kakashi. For the first time since the war, Hiruzen can see both of the boy’s eyes.
“Soul-searching,” he echoes. He’s fairly sure Hatake Kakashi, perhaps his best ANBU and the most unlucky shinobi currently in the village, just quit. Something which is actually illegal, despite his leniency towards Tsunade.
“I’m glad you understand!” Kakashi chirps. Chirps. What.
“What.” Kakashi just beams at him and… vanishes in a swirl of air? Hiruzen stares at where the shinobi was and then realizes that, before anything else, he’s going to have to find a new prospective sensei for the new prospective Team 7. He’s also going to have to fill out the paperwork to officially discharge Kakashi from ANBU. He’s also got to decide if he’s going to list Kakashi as a rogue-nin or hand wave his absence like he did Tsunade’s.
“Fuck.” He says emphatically and gets busy trying to figure out who to assign Team 7 to. Ebisu doesn’t have a team but he’s never been the sort Hiruzen really wants in charge of teaching the next generation of shinobi, Genma doesn’t have a team but he’s as liable to throw the brats headlong into the Forest of Death as he is to actually teach them, Tenzo is strong and worked with Kakashi long enough to understand the basics of the sharingan but Hiruzen would be loathe to lose another skilled ANBU…
Kisame is being followed. Or Itachi is but it amounts to the same thing. Itachi’s noticed it as well, his sharingan active and his eyes flicking to take in the forest around them. There are very few people out there that could follow around the two of them without getting caught and none who would have a reason to as opposed to attacking or running.
Maybe they want to join the Akatsuki? Although if they think this is the way to make a good first impression, Kisame is pretty sure they don’t want them. Of course, there’s not really any missing-nin listed in any of Bingo Books that are skilled enough to be considered for the Akatsuki anyway.
Of course, Kisame thinks blandly when their stalker finally wanders into sight, nose buried in a book, Hatake Kakashi is not a missing-nin by any measure and he’s definitely at the skill level of an Akatsuki prospect. Kisame and Itachi do not exchange a glance because they’re more professional than that but the urge is there.
“Oh hello Hoshigaki-san, Itachi-kun,” Hatake greets pleasantly, eyes curling into crescents. And that’s a surprise too— last Kisame knew, the Konoha shinobi wore his hitai-ate over his scarred eye. Although, now that Kisame is looking for it, he can’t actually see any hitai-ate.
“…Hatake-san,” Kisame returns because Hatake was polite. Itachi appears to have gone catatonic. In light of this, Kisame finds himself asking “what are you doing here?”
“Oh, you know,” Hatake says happily, “soul-searching.”
“Soul-searching,” Kisame echoes. The situation is not making any more sense as time goes on.
“Mhm,” Hatake hums, attention back on his book. Kisame finally gives into the urge to glance at his partner but Itachi is placidly watching Hatake and doesn’t seem to notice Kisame’s questioning look.
“…Kakashi-taichou?” Itachi finally inquires after a long pause. The honorific is a little concerning since Itachi hasn’t been a Konoha shinobi for a long time now but Kisame’s willing to give him the benefit of the doubt considering how strange this interaction has been.
“Say, Itachi,” Hatake starts, eyes still glued to his book, “what would you do if the moon was evil?” Okay, what the fuck. That’s not a normal question. Itachi’s brow furrows but Kisame genuinely can’t tell if it’s because he’s pondering his answer or because Hatake just asked something insane. Sage, what if Konoha shinobi are just like this? Kisame can’t deal with Itachi asking him his opinion on evil moons or— or lonely suns or whatever.
“I would destroy it,” Itachi says eventually. Kisame wonders if his partner is being serious or if this is some sort of weird code. At this point, he’d almost prefer it if his partner was a traitor and this was all some weird code that would make sense at a later time. Hatake hums again.
“If you say so,” the weird man says cheerily before wandering into the forest with his nose still buried in his book.
“What the fuck.” Itachi, ever in Big Brother Mode, gives him a Look for the swear.
Maybe this whole day has been a fever dream…
Kakashi is in Kamui. Obito has no idea how long Kakashi has been in Kamui but there he is, relaxing against a block, reading Icha Icha. He does not, Obito notices, have a hitai-ate. He also doesn’t have his father’s tanto and Obito honestly can’t remember a time Kakashi was without that tanto when outside Konoha. Maybe he assumed Kamui is safe? He would have no reason to think otherwise— he would have had to get through with Obito’s mangekyo and as far as he knows, Obito is dead.
Although, as far as Obito knew, Kakashi didn’t have access to the mangekyo. That must have changed, clearly, but he doesn’t know when or how and Obito— well, Obito has known everything about Kakashi these past years. Every mission, every failed genin team, every visit to the Memorial Stone. He hasn’t checked up on Kakashi in three days. What could have possible happened in three days to have Kakashi gain access to the mangekyo, learn to warp into kamui, and apparently retire. Or go rogue or something.
“You know,” Kakashi muses apropos nothing, “I always wondered what I would have done if I had a second chance. Save Minato-sensei, save Kushina-nee, save my father?” Kakashi flips a page in his book. “Save you, Obito?” Obito stills, every tiny fidget vanishing as his focus narrows down to Kakashi and the space between them. “I suppose it’s a moot point. I’m now, not then. There’s nothing I can do to change those events in this time, no jutsu I can use, no sacrifice I can make. The past is gone, the dead are dead. And there’s nothing either of us can do about it.” Obito debates leaving Kakashi here, talking to empty space, snuffing out whatever tiny hope his former teammate thinks he found. He debates going down there, playing Tobi or Madara or just some random eye-stealing shinobi. He debates for one moment killing Kakashi. He leaps down to land in front of him but Kakashi doesn’t so much as glance up, even though he’s clearly not reading any more. If he ever was.
“How?” He asks. Kakashi fingers the edge of Icha Icha for a moment before he snaps the book closed and slides it away, finally looking up at Obito.
“Does it matter?” Kakashi asks. Obito stares at him, thinks about his hand through Rin’s chest. He doesn’t kill Kakashi.
“Where’s your hitai-ate?” Kakashi blinks at him, apparently not expecting that question. He smiles or at least the way his eyes curve implies he does.
“I turned it in. I’m soul-searching.” Obito stares flatly, disbelieving.
“And, what, the Hokage just let you go?” Kakashi beams. Really truly beams. And it doesn’t look fake. Played up, yes, teasing, absolutely, but there’s no sardonic edge to it, no sense that it’s empty. Three days. Three days and Kakashi might as well be a different man.
“Oh, he didn’t really have much of a choice. He can’t follow me into Kamui, after all.” Kakashi sends an appreciative look around like Kamui, blocky and unending and just generally creepy, is a place to like.
“Why are you here? Why are you doing all this?” Obito asks, a note of frustration curling out from his careful control, infecting his voice and demeanor. Kakashi had always been able to drag his less savory emotions to the forefront. Irritation, annoyance, anger. Hate.
“Because you’re stuck in the past,” Kakashi says simply. “You’re looking back. For once, I’m looking forward.” Obito closes the gap between them in a moment, wrenching Kakashi up by the front of his flack jacket and slamming him back into the wall behind him.
“I am creating a future that not even you can ruin,” Obito snarls. “I’m dragging these violent, unforgivable nations to peace kicking and screaming.” Kakashi reaches out and Obito expect to feel a hand at his throat or cheek but no— Kakashi’s fingertips just hit his mask, curling lightly along it’s edge. He had forgotten he was wearing it.
“It won’t bring her back,” Kakashi says softly. “It won’t bring any of them back. An illusion is just an illusion and it will never be the same.” There’s a half-second of warning, Kakashi’s chakra spiking as the air warps, and then he’s gone, no hint of him having ever been there at all beyond the fast-fading smell of dog.
Orochimaru is in his lab when the Hatake brat steps in. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say ANBU Inu steps in. There’s no sign of Hatake’s perpetual slouch or his wandering attention, just the smooth movements and sharp focus of ANBU. Orochimaru sets down the vial he had only just picked up and keeps one careful eye on Hatake. Hatake has always been skilled, a dangerous opponent even to the Sannin, but he had always been weaker. Now, Orochimaru isn’t so sure. His chakra is smothered to just the barest hint of ozone but there is a difference in the way he holds himself, a confidence in his movements, that puts Orochimaru on edge.
The sharingan, he realizes suddenly. It no longer stands out as distinctly other. Hatake has somehow managed to integrate it into his chakra system. It probably doesn’t take nearly as much chakra as it used to, though Hatake is still keeping his eye closed. There’s no hitai-ate covering it. How… curious.
“Was there something you wanted?” Orochimaru asks. Hatake stops his circling between Orochimaru and the door. He looks far more wolf-like than he usually allows himself to.
“I’m giving you warning,” Kakashi says, “because you were once friends with people close to me.” Sakumo, Orochimaru thinks, though he hadn’t know the younger Hatake was aware his father once ran with the Sannin. “Leave Uchiha Sasuke alone,” Kakashi continues, just the hint of a growl in his voice, “or I’ll tear your throat out with my teeth.”
“Oh?” Orochimaru says dangerously, shifting forward in a clear threat. Hatake doesn’t blink, doesn’t shrink back, doesn’t tremble. There’s no fear scent in the air. “And what, pray tell, would you know about that?” Hatake regards him coldly.
“I’ll only say it once more. Leave Uchiha Sasuke out of your plans. If you want a sharingan so bad, take it up with Danzo.” Hatake is gone in the next moment, vanished into the air with no hint of a shunshin or other jutsu. Just the barest hint of red.
(Zetsu dies screaming.)
The door that blocks the entrance to the Akatsuki hideout scrapes open. This would be less noticeable if everyone in the Akatsuki wasn’t already gathered in the meeting room. Everyone stops and turns almost as one, waiting to see what idiot decided to waltz into their lair. (Konan and Pein don’t appreciate it when Deidara calls it a lair but he calls it like he sees it, un.)
When the idiot is revealed to be Hatake Kakashi, of all people, the air turns just a hair more panicky. The sound of Kisame’s forehead meeting the table is loud in the quiet. Hatake wanders further in, nose buried in a book (is that porn?!), and drops into the seat Zetsu once used without a word. It was shock that stilled everyone’s hand initially but now no one makes a move because if they can avoid a fight with Hatake Kakashi, man of a thousand justsu, why the fuck wouldn’t they? He couldn’t beat them all but that doesn’t mean he couldn’t do some serious damage before he died. It is, surprisingly, Itachi that speaks up first.
“Why are you here, Kakashi-taichou?” He asks politely.
“I’m terrorizing your boss into having morals again,” Hatake informs. He flips a page in his book. Itachi placidly stops Kisame from slamming his head against the table again.
“What the fuck?” Deidara puts out there. Because honestly, what the fuck.
“Don’t mind me,” Hatake says cheerfully. He flips a page in his book. Deidara’s not sure he’s actually reading.
“…I have morals,” Pein says after a long moment. Hatake hums and flips another page in his book. He doesn’t respond. After a moment, Konan clears her throat.
“If you don’t leave, we are going to have to kill you, Hatake-san.” Finally, Hatake looks up, book snapping shut in his hold. His one open eye scans over them all and Deidara scowls when it gets to him. Hatake might not be an Uchiha but everyone knows he has one of their eyes. Deidara hates the stupid sharingan.
“Maa, that’s not very nice,” Hatake says lightly. “I’m really only here to visit an old friend.”
“Who the fuck is friends with you?” Hidan snaps. “Fucking Itachi?!” Hatake blinks. It’s slow and lazy like. Deidara wonders if the guy thinks they’re threats at all.
“No,” he says. He does not elaborate. After a moment he opens his book back up. There’s only a second before the air twists and an arm appears to drag Hatake away into thin air. They all stare at the now empty seat. Kisume attempts to brain himself again, once more stopped by Itachi.
“What the fuck?” Deidara says again because it really cannot be said enough. Seriously, Konoha nin are the worst.
“What are you doing?” Obito snarls. He’s got Kakashi jammed up against a cube in Kamui again though considering the stupid genius asshole managed to escape last time he doesn’t figure he’ll be overly successful at keeping him here this time. He should just stab him. Leave him to die. Obito’s going to get a better version of him and Rin in the Infinite Tsukuyomi anyway, what’s the point of leaving him alive if he’s being more trouble than he’s worth?
“Weren’t you listening?” Kakashi asks innocently. “I’m terrorizing you into having morals again. I can’t punch you and make you good or talk you into being better or threaten to take away your right to bones or anything so this is the best I can do.” The worst part about it, Obito thinks, the worst part is that he sounds so genuine while saying such insane shit.
“Kakashi.” Obito stops because he’s not entirely sure how he should respond to something like that. “Kakashi, literally what the fuck.”
“What’s the point of putting the entire world under an illusion, anyway? Sure. everyone would get their perfect little worlds but they would all starve to death,” Kakashi says. Obito stares at him.
“What.”
“If everyone was in an illusion,” Kakashi says patiently, “how would they eat? Or drink, actually? Or have kids? Everyone would just die.”
“That— no, they— this fucking world sucks, anyway, and if everyone dies happy, what does it matter?!” Kakashi frowns at him. He looks disappointed which is entirely unfair. Kakashi should hate him or be angry with him but he just looks— tired. Disappointed. Sad but in a resigned kind of way. It’s not— even now, it’s not the empty exhaustion that’s plagued him since Obito killed Minato-sensei and Kushina-nee (oh god, he killed them, they were family and he killed them).
“It’s not peace if everyone’s dead,” Kakashi said. “And illusions aren’t real. That happiness isn’t real. Even the sharingan can’t trick an entire world to believe an entirely fake lifetime. It won’t work, Obito. If you don’t want to come back to Konoha, that’s fine, I’ll stay with you. If you want to work towards peace, that’s fine. But starting a war where the end result is an entire dead planet is not the way to get it.” Obito stares at Kakashi. Kakashi, who would leave Konoha for him even though Konoha is everything to him. Kakashi, who was always the smartest one on their team. Kakashi, who agrees that things should be better. Kakashi, who he can’t bring himself to kill. Kakashi, who he knows is right.
Obito runs.
Something very strange is happening in the world right now. Jiraiya has feelers out in just about every nation. He’s probably the most knowledgeable spymaster in the world. The things he knows go as follows:
One: Hatake Kakashi, his grand-student, has left Konohagakure in a not dissimilar way to how Tsunade left Konoha. This makes less than zero sense because Kakashi adores Konoha. It’s all the kid has left. Jiraiya lost everything and left. Kakashi lost everything and he sold his soul to Konoha. Kakashi is obsessive to the point of concern and there is no earthly reason Jiraiya can possibly come up with that explains why Kakashi is not still at Konoha.
Two: something happened with the Akatsuki. They’ve been exceedingly quiet lately, barely doing more than the absolute minimun required to keep a terrorist organizaion afloat. Nagato and Konan have redoubled their presence in Amegakure which feels a little like a step in the right direction, if Jiraiya’s being honest. There’s not been a whisper about the Akatsuki’s plans regarding the bijuu.
Three: something happened over at Mountains’ Graveyard. Let him rephrase. Something exploded over at Mountains’ Graveyard. It had to have been a big explosion as well because that’s an area that’s pretty universally avoided.
Four: Kiri has gone abruptly silent. The only thing Jiraiya’s managed to get out of that is that the Mizukage apparently had a complete change in personality.
Other things have happened as well, a cascade effect of change across every nation. Kakashi seems to be at the center of a good quarter of things he comes across. Nothing that makes sense. Most of the rest of it seems tied to the Akatsuki’s missing presence or the missions they are taking or it’s tied to the absolute nothing coming in and out of Kiri.
Something very strange is happening in the world. Jiraiya just hopes it’s a good strange.
Tsunade opens the door to the Hatake brat and a guy in an Akatsuki cloak and an orange mask. Tsunade slams the door shut. Shizune is gone, dealing with their last matters in town before they leave. Tsunade is not drunk. She knows this. She knows intimately every stage of drunkenness and how it affects her. Tsunade is not drunk. She opens the door. Hatake and the Akatsuki guy are still there.
“What the fuck do you want?” She demands.
“How do you feel about healing—” Tsunade slams the door in their faces. When she turns around to go out the window, they’re in the middle of the room. “Rude,” Hatake says, like he didn’t just teleport into her hotel room uninvited. “I know you don’t like blood and all but I’m trying to stop the end of the world, here.” Tsunade stares at them. She thinks for a moment about the effects of repeated head trauma and then about the average injuries a shinobi usually gets in a year. She decides that Kakashi has no brain left and that she does not want any part in this, for a variety of reasons.
“Get out of my room,” she says.
“It’s not technically your room,” Hatake tries.
“Out,” Tsunade interrupts loudly. Hatake sighs and looks like a kicked puppy but does grab his oddly silent companion by the elbow and drag them past her, out the door.
“I told you she wouldn’t help,” the Akatsuki guy says with a surprisingly low voice before Tsunade slams the door shut behind them. She waits until she’s sure they’re gone before opening the door and heading down towards where she knows Shizune will be waiting. She’ll deal with whatever the fuck that was exactly never.
It started with Hatake Kakashi showing up on time. Hiruzen will not budge on that. He’s half convinced he somehow ended up in an alternate universe where everything is just a little weird and that was the first sign. It started with Kakashi. It continued with Jiraiya coming back, looking uneasy and hesitantly hopeful with news that apparently bad things are just. Resolving themselves. It continued with Team 7 (under Gekko Hayate) starting to act just plain weird. It continued with Danzo’s death— apparently of natural causes but everyone has their doubts, of course. It continued with Team 7’s disappearance and Gekko’s miraculous recovery of his lifetime illness. Gekko himself seems entirely uncertain on both of these topics. It continued with Tsunade’s return and subsequent hostile takeover of the hospital, complaining about ‘stupid silver-haired brats’ and ‘creepy fucking undead Uchihas’ and ‘that asshole is blackmailing and bribing me, the little shit’ all the while. Hiruzen decides he will not deal with this any longer. He resigns.
Shikako is pigeonholed into becoming Hokage. He makes sure that it is everyone's problem.
Obito will admit, he was distracted. He didn’t see the attack coming. Then again, who the fuck would expect a tiny red and pink arrow of a genin to come flying out of the woods at speeds even the sharingan can’t keep up with just to put a tiny fist through your chest? No one, that’s who.
Obito still gasps awake, sorer than he has been in years, a backlog of guilt choking him up. He is surrounded. Kakashi is behind and half under him, apparently acting as his not-death-bed, and the pink-haired menace that killed him in the first place is disturbingly close to his face, staring at him intensely. Sasuke is on his left and Naruto on his right and he feels a little like he might die a second (third?) time.
“What the fuck?” Obito half-sobs with feeling.
“It’s better not to question it,” Kakashi recommends sagely.
(“Hey so are we ever going back to Konoha?” Naruto asks a week later after Obito has cried enough tears to last at least seven lifetimes and feels a little more like a human being. The whole group turns to him. Obito doesn’t particularly want to return to Konoha. He’s still sorting through the mess of emotions Madara manipulated him into having in his head but he knows that Konoha definitely isn’t his home any more, if it ever was. It’s hurt him too much and he’s hurt it too much. Sakura, little pink-haired she-devil that she is, shrugs.
“Nah,” she says after a moment. And that, apparently, is the end of that.)
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queenuchiha89 · 9 months ago
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Haiiii! Idk if you're still writing but can I request something with big bro Itachi? Maybe him letting one of his friends like Shisui or Kisame noncon his little sister, and the entire time he's just gently holding her head on his lap, stroking her hair and feigning sympathy whenever she cries to her onii-chan that it hurts?🤤
After a very long hiatus... With pleasure. 😈🔥
***NSFW***
***18+ ONLY MINORS DNI***
***TW.DARK CONTENT***
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It was common for itachi and Shisui to be hanging around the Uchiha family home, as he was Itachi's best friend and they often trained together. Nothing was unusual about this day... At first. Y/N had come out and asked the two of them to come inside and wash up for lunch as she had prepared food for them. They both paused and looked at her in her pink sundress dancing elegantly in the spring breeze, making her face contorts in confusion. She turned to walk back into the house, not bothering to notice that the two of them had been whispering to each other as she walked off.
After they finished lunch, they mentioned wanting to play a game with Y/N before continuing their training, and since they rarely invited her in on anything, she is happy to oblige. They take her into Itachi's room and as she goes to ask what game they are playing, the two chant '1,2,3!' and force her down onto the bed. "W-what are you doing???" She questions as itachi holds her head in his lap and pins her arms down with one of his powerful hands. She kicks and flails as Shisui forces her dress up and removes her panties. "No! Stop!" Y/N cries out but it all falls on deaf ears as Shisui quickly positions himself between her legs. "don't be scared. I promise you'll love it ..." He says as he hastily lines himself up against her entrance. "Onii-chan please don't!" She begs as she looks up at him, eyes red and filled with tears. Itachi just smirks down at her, stroking her hair. "Don't worry, it's not as bad as you think... "He says as he watches her face contort in pain as Shisui slowly starts forcing his cock inside of her. She sobs "onii- it... It hurts!" She chokes out between sobs. Itachi only holds her more firmly. "Aww does it? Well... Too bad" he growls as he watches his best friend rape his little sister's virgin pussy, his own lust for her growing inside of him.
Shisui's thrusts become more erratic and Y/N's body tenses up, unable to handle the new sensations. Her body shivers as she is about to cum completely against her will. "n-no! I- I can't take anymore!" She pleads but it's no use. She gasps and her body shivers and Shisui thrusts his cock deep inside her as he fills her up with his seed. Itachi kissing your lips as he brushes your hair out of your face. "Good girl Y/N. Go get cleaned up... Onii isn't done with you yet..."
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or0ch1maru · 11 months ago
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headcanons for playing just dance with the akatsuki members? 💃
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This is honestly fucking hilarious and I’m the perfect amount of buzzed for this
I can’t stop laughing at imagining how this would actually go
Also, I haven’t played just dance in years so if I make a mistake in anything, let me know and I’ll edit it🫶🏻
Hidan:
•would be the type to forget to tighten the strap around his wrist, the remote going soaring when he swings his arm too hard. Bonus points if it hits another member or breaks something
•doesn’t play fair. AT ALL. Will knock into his opponent or shit talk to the point it distracts them
•I can see him being the type to play this game drunk, not buzzed, but drunk. His movements over exaggerated and sloppy. He thinks he’s doing amazing but in reality he looks like a fish out of water, flapping & flailing around
Kakuzu:
•he would rather give up all his money before playing something so ‘stupid’ and ‘childish’ and that says a lot lol
•would sit off to the side, watching as his comrades play and enjoy themselves. Just because he’s a grouch and doesn’t let loose like they do, doesn’t mean he’ll ruin their fun
•I can see him disappearing and hiding in his room to avoid Hidan’s constant begging and whining. He knows deep down Kakuzu would eventually give into him, even if it’s only to shut him up and Kakuzu doesn’t want to ‘stoop to that level’
Konan:
•omg, she’d be so good at it. Her movements smooth and languid. She doesn’t look out of place at all like Hidan does, moving as if she was a natural dancer
•ends up racking up the most points by the end of the game, beating everybody she plays against. Her focus controlled, even when up against Hidan, who tries to knock her knee out
•isn’t ashamed one bit, not even if the dance moves displayed come off corny to others, ignoring the chuckles of her mates as she copies the choreography
Pain:
•at the very beginning, he’d be shy. His movements stiff. His hands barely leaving the sides of his body as he copies what’s displayed on the screen
•would totally be flustered, cheeks red and an awkward smile plastered on his face as he feels all the eyes of his teammates on him as he dances
•it’s not until he’s like 5 drinks in, feeling a decent buzz when he finally lets go and dances like no tomorrow. Not giving a shit if he messes up
Kisame:
•the team cheerleader. Claps, cheers, and shouts as he encourages his mates to keep going.
•even though he’s skilled on the battlefield doesn’t entirely mean he’s a good dancer. With how big he is, his movements are erratic, taking up most of the space in front of the tv, and ends up knocking into his opponent a few times
•doesn’t care about points or winning as he’s simply enjoying bonding as friends and family. Knowing he’d cherish this moment forever
Itachi:
•just like Konan, his movements would be smooth, but also sharp and precise
•I also believe he’d be a little apprehensive at first, not because he feels like he’d embarrass himself or anything, but because he hasn’t been able to relax and have fun in a long time, having to grow up so early in life
•ends up having the time of his life, coming in second to Konan, and having a celebratory drink to commemorate his small victory
Tobi:
•would be an absolute clown about everything but truthfully, making everyone’s night even better
•I think he’d be shy, just like pain, but once he gets over it, would have a lot of fun. Focusing on the dance moves as much as possible even though he ends up missing a step time to time
•would take FOREVER trying to pick a song, I feel like he’d chose something by lady Gaga or Rihanna. Something fun and upbeat
Zetsu:
•honestly, I think he wouldn’t participate. Would linger and watch the others as they play. Taking post in his favorite spot in the wall or on the arm of the couch
•black and white Zetsu would be going back and forth between the two of them as white Zetsu wants to play but black Zetsu doesn’t. Ends up giving in and sitting aside the whole night
•would sneak back later once everyone has gone to bed or passed out drunk to play by himself
Sasori:
•would also think the game is ‘stupid’ but after a drink or two would be the first one with a remote in his hand, ready to dance
•once he gets in the zone, his mates all agreed he had a natural ‘talent’, not better than Konan or Itachi, but close to it. What his mates don’t know is that he comes into the living room to play time to time when nobody’s home
•when he’s not playing, he makes sure his friends have what they want or need. Snack, another beer, etc
Deidara:
•nervous baby for sure. At the beginning that is.
•When he wins his first match, beating Kisame in a landslide, that win, gets to his head. Ends up cocky and taunting everybody, only to lose his next match to Hidan.
•definitely flamboyant and extravagant with his moves. Almost hit Hidan in the face before his loss. Curses when he drops the remote. Completely forgot to even slide the strap on his wrist, which gave Hidan the chance to succeed
Orochimaru:
•at first, they’d simply enjoy watching and observing their team as they play and have fun. For some reason I can see them writing things down for their research. Something about how bonding is essential for security and happiness in a friend group
•orochimaru would be enjoying the drinks more than the game, drink after drink to help unwind, realizing how much they truly enjoy being around others compared to being stuck in the lab all day
•would play a round or two towards the end of the night for the hell of it. Using the excuse of ‘it’s for my research’ instead of coming clean about their real reason. They wanted to experience the fun but they’d never admit that
I had lady Gaga’s, heavy metal lover on repeat while writing this. I love her and I feel like a handful of the akatsuki would too🫶🏻
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yowyowyaoi · 1 year ago
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Kakuzu: Hey, everyone, I've been thinking ... lets have a Halloween party. Deidara: ... huh? Hidan: Are you fuckin' serious? Kakuzu: Yes I'm serious. We'll have music, food, drinks, dancing, games, decorations ... Itachi: Are you feeling ill right now? Kakuzu: I've never felt better. Come on, what do you say? Konan, teasing: Can we get catering from that really expensive Italian place in town? Kakuzu: Of course. Entrees AND desserts. Hang the expense. Nagato: ... really are you positive you feel alright? Kakuzu: Absolutely fine. Deidara, it's been a while since you've let off any explosions, hasn't it? How about we get you some major explosives for our party? You can set them off wherever you want and blow up anything you desire. Would you like that? Deidara: Deidara: *starts crying and clinging to Sasori* Danna make him stop! I'm scared, hm! Kisame: This is frightening me, as well. Perhaps somebody should hold him down and let Sasori do a mental health evaluation on him ... Sasori: Oh, I couldn't do that. I'm done fooling around with the human body. No more puppets, no more poisons. Deidara: *jumps a step back* Sasori, what are you saying?! Sasori: I'm saying my art isn't what's important; togetherness with family is. Kakuzu: I agree. Money means nothing; YOU guys mean everything! Everyone: Everyone: *runs screaming from the room* Kakuzu: Heh; I told you we could give them all a good scare this year. Sasori: *chuckles* Pretty sure Deidara was going to wet his pants.
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eye-kandii · 5 days ago
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MANEATER
Chapter 1
In her first act of freedom, Y/n had left a trail of destruction. The charred remnants of the prison stood as a grim reminder of her escape. Bodies of elite shinobi littered the scene—men and women who had underestimated her rage, her cunning, and the deadly allure of her siren-like abilities.
Whispers of her power and beauty spread like wildfire. The few survivors described her last act before vanishing: seducing the warden with a knife pressed to his throat, her voice like velvet laced with venom. "Open the gate," she had whispered, a seductive smirk on her lips. "Or bleed out in my arms.
He'd obeyed, of course. Who wouldn't?
The tension in the dimly lit Akatsuki hideout was palpable. Pain's Rinnegan glowed faintly in the shadows as he addressed the group.
"This Y/n Chisuke has stolen the world's attention from our mission," he stated, his voice cold. "She's a nuisance we cannot ignore."
Kisame leaned back against the wall, grinning. "A rogue kunoichi causing this much chaos? Gotta say, I'm intrigued. Think she'd join us?"
Deidara scoffed, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "If she doesn't blow herself up first, yeah, sure."
"It doesn't matter what her motives are," Pain interrupted, his tone brooking no argument. "She's a distraction. Find her. Kill her if you must. But do not let her stand in our way."
Y/n leaned back against the trunk of an ancient tree, a joint dangling from her lips as she exhaled a slow, steady stream of smoke. Her red-dyed curls framed her face, her dark brown eyes scanning the horizon.
"Two years," she muttered, her voice low and raspy. "Two years locked up for something I didn't even do."
Her gaze flicked to the jagged knife in her hand, the same blade she'd used to carve her way out of that hellhole. The memory of her sister's lifeless body flashed in her mind, and her jaw tightened.
The flickering light of a dying campfire danced against the walls of a secluded cavern deep within the Land of Rain. The sound of rain echoed from the cavern's mouth, muffling the crackle of the flames and the low murmurs of the three figures seated around it.
Y/n Chisuke, notorious fugitive and the world's most wanted rogue kunoichi, sat cross-legged on the ground. Her red curls gleamed under the firelight, and a haze of smoke swirled around her as she took a slow drag from her joint. Across from her, the twin rogue ninjas Yuki and Yukan leaned against each other, their expressions tense but relieved.
"We always knew they'd come for you," Yuki said, her voice soft but firm. She tucked a strand of her long, silver hair behind her ear and stared into the fire. "But we didn't think they'd go this far."
Yukan, her twin, frowned, his dark eyes fixed on Y/n. "Half the shinobi world wants your head, Y/n. Staying with us is dangerous."
Y/n smirked, blowing out a plume of smoke. "Danger's all I've known, Yukan. Besides..." Her voice turned low, bitter. "Where else am I gonna go? Everyone else thinks I'm a monster. Only y'all know the truth."
The twins exchanged a glance, their bond unspoken but clear. They'd been through too much together to turn her away now.
Yuki's hand rested gently on Y/n's knee, grounding her back to the present. "We know you didn't kill her, Y/n. And we know who did."
Y/n's jaw clenched, the firelight reflecting in her dark eyes like embers. "Then why don't the rest of them know? Why doesn't anyone believe me?"
"Because the truth doesn't matter to them," Yukan said bitterly, his voice low. He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "You're a scapegoat, a convenient target to distract the world from their own failures."
Y/n's smirk returned, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Well, if they wanted a monster, they've got one now."
Unbeknownst to the trio, search parties continued to comb through the forests and villages of the Land of Rain. Shinobi from every village—Konoha, Suna, Kiri, and beyond—were relentless in their pursuit. Every dead lead only fueled their frustration and resolve.
The Akatsuki had also intensified their efforts. Itachi and Kisame had been dispatched to investigate rumors of a rogue kunoichi sheltering in the area. Deidara had been particularly eager, claiming he wanted to "test her resolve" with his explosives.
But Y/n had been careful. For months now, she hadn't stepped foot outside the cavern except under the cover of night. The twins ensured she remained hidden, their skills in infiltration and deception keeping them one step ahead of the hunters.
"We can't stay here forever," Yukan said, breaking the silence.
"Duh," Y/n replied, rolling her eyes as she flicked ash into the fire. "I didn't escape that hellhole just to sit around."
Yuki tilted her head, her sharp gaze fixed on Y/n. "So what's the plan?"
Y/n grinned, a dangerous glint in her eyes. "We find out who really killed my sister. And when we do..." She let the sentence hang, but the weight of her words was clear.
Yukan leaned back, a slow smile spreading across his face. "That's the Y/n I know."
"Damn right," Y/n said, taking another drag. "They wanted a war. Let's give them one."
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immoralimmortals · 10 days ago
Text
A Song With Ten Names
Chapter 46: Um, It's Kind of a Lot
Chapter 1 ☆ Next chapter ☆ AO3 ☆ Featured song playlist
You can be afraid to the point you avoid everything. But if you think you're unlovable...well...you can't really plan on protecting yourself from love if you don't see it coming, do you?
And Kisame loves and is loved very, very much.
Author's Note:
The song for this chapter is Um, It's Kind of A Lot by Will Wood. Most every Akatsuki member had someone vouching for them in the last poll, but the response was overwhelming: it's time for more Kisame. So here you go! One of THE Characters of All Time.
Also here is his playlist because I'm in love with him
Content warnings for this chapter: discussion of child abuse, child suicidality, and maladaptive daydreaming
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
I'm afraid of leaving my house
I'm afraid of dying of cancer
I'm afraid of black sedans, white vans, and computers
I'm afraid of losing my mind
I'm afraid of windows and airplanes
I'm afraid of my past, my fans, and my future
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
The next day is harder.
It’s pretty similar to that spell of time, weeks just after she was retrieved from the clutches of the hoshi surveillance team. Numb...quiet...vulnerable. As soon as she woke up this morning, she knew there wasn’t breath in her lungs, not the kind that'd let her talk. The good news is that she had a long moment to herself, to watch the dust motes dance in the early sunshine of the living room, even brighter than usual as ice skirting the outside of her home glistened like diamonds. Deidara was there. All other times, it was kind of odd...but today, looking with eyes that had missed him for so long...well…
Something about it feels the good kind of familiar.
The traveler exhales through her nose and decides to rest her head a second longer, and a second turns into an hour or two away...
...
“You can stay, you know, un.”
The artist himself is awake now, she sees, upturning his chin to a man best identified by the girth of his body and the cool-colored tint of his hands. Kisame sighs.
“I know,” he lies. “It’ll be...an extensive introduction, is all. Can’t be easy for her, getting everyone back at once. One at a time is best, if it can be helped."
Deidara doesn’t understand, so he hums questioningly, but no further explanation is given.
Step, step, step away...and he is gone. It’s the blonde’s turn to sigh. As he recenters, tilting his head down towards his knees and then up— swishing his hair at the roots as if to get more alert— his visible eye widens and blinks. “Ah! Takara-chan...!” he greets pleasantly. She watches him stand up from the chair he slept in yet again, swing his arms by their sockets, cover his mouth with a yawn, and trudge over. Deidara smiles at the performer, eyeliner smudged so cutely and lips curling up at the edges in a way a bit too goofy for the cool persona he usually puts on. Little...by little…his expression drops.
“...Takara-chan?”
Her given name echos in her ears as a woman trapped inside herself watches Deidara realize she’s in that different state than usual. All the same, though guilty that he worries, she likes the way he takes her hands and looks to her for something she can’t yet give.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
But I never been afraid of no one breaking my heart
It's not like I'm 'bout to fall and cut my throat on the shards
And I'm afraid of damn near everything
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
The dust waltzes on and on, the normally invisible dancers so very seen, making it clear to the performer that even the air itself is alive if you take the time to look at it. They stream in with the shape of horizontal bars, matching the light’s entry points. The closet door is not fully solid, instead made with thin, long slabs of wood that are structured like window blinds. She looks at her toes, sticking out from the pile of winter clothes that tumbled out of her way to make room for a throne, that fit for the princess of quiet time and too many words with no place to go. She hopes the contrast— cold feet and overheated hands hiding under the swarm of sweaters— will help her “wake up”.
Kisame spots a few scattered remnants of the laundry from an adjacent hallway. With a skeptically raised brow, he sets down his hot cup of tea and comes to investigate. Expression shifts as he sticks his head through the opening. What a surprise. “O-oh,” he stammers. “Princess…” Yup, no denying it. There the lady is, sitting in a closet.
So what the hell is he supposed to do about that? Certainly, it doesn’t seem right. He can’t just leave her there.
...
Dammit, he’s been staring at her too long. The swordsman makes a decision. “Oh, princess…” he sighs, taking a step in to reach down and scoop her up—
Thwp.
“Hgn—!”
Clunk.
He slips on knit fabric, falls inside, and the door knocks shut. Her face is suddenly right in front of his, noses nearly touching, as a flustered man holds himself up in a straddle, palms pressed beside either side of her head. She is underneath him, alone with bodies flush together.
He has to recover, and fast.
“Shit…! You okay?!” He pushes himself up, begins to raise at the knees to gain enough distance to evaluate the girl. She doesn’t answer, and the room is darker now; a bar of light is over her eyes, and they look big...but thankfully do not seem scared. He exhales, and goes to turn the knob—
Wait.
“...Ah, shit,” he swears again.
There is no internal knob for this dingy damn closet door. God is surely real because he certainly goes out of his way to show Kisame how much he hates him.
“Hang on, Takara-hime. Sorry. I’ll get this—”
And he stops halfway between whatever the hell he’d have to do as soon as he feels his cloak be tugged, ever so slightly. Kisame grunts in surprise, turning his gaze; she has reached a hand out to hold onto him.
“What?” he asks, the whiteness of his eyes even more apparent than usual in the low light. But she just stares at him...and does not let go. Another sigh. He’s too tall for this “room”; there’s a shelf just above their heads, and so he couldn’t stand up straight even if he tried. So shoulders hunched, he looks down at her and waits for further instruction.
Slowly...slowly...the performer manages to let go of him...move her arm in…and then bend her hand back and forth by the wrist. Come here, is the clear request.
And terrible thing he is, Kisame obeys, despite the danger of this. Her being in this...special sort of state...it makes it easier, in a way. It lets him step up— be big, be strong, do things for her, in the sort of way he really wants to. Most of the time it would be demeaning, to assume someone can’t speak, walk, have trouble moving at all...but not when she really needs it.
Then he gets to be her everything and blame it all on servitude.
He feels so guilty, still, for having enjoyed the days where he carried her outside for walks. That’s why he was hoping to avoid her, since this illness of sorts has taken her again.
But she indulges him right now, asks for it, so he obediently squats in what little space left for a giant like him. “What’s up?” he asks, knowing she won’t answer with words. And his heart flutters as she draws forward, knuckles brushing against the small of his palm; he makes room for her, opening his hand, and it isn’t long before fingers tangle. He doesn’t move beyond that. There’s no literal scales on his body, but the shark knows his skin is rough— and even if we disregard his physical self, the rest of him is, too. And it makes the man so, so gentle, even if he doesn’t know it.
What is a knight if not, ultimately, the plaything of their royal?
Dark, light, dark, light. The bars caused by the door’s slits climb down her body, and she is beautiful. He swallows, and Kisame pushes down his wicked, wild thoughts so that a lady may do as she pleases. Her soft fingertips search further...down his wrist...under his forearm, up his elbow. Her arm is entirely swallowed by the sleeve of his cloak.
Silly thing, realizing this, gives him a smile, and he can’t help but smile back. His sharp teeth glisten nearly as bright as the sclera that consumes most of his eyes. Her other arm raises, and he adjusts so it has a straight path up his remaining free sleeve.
The smallest, smallest giggle. It’s muted by all the soft things surrounding them, their secret. The performer closes her eyes as corners of her mouth rise further up, and Kisame realizes he’d carry the world for her, if that was something she asked. Something that dire isn’t on the agenda...but…
Kisame being her protector does make him so easy to talk to, even when talking is hard, and she wants to carry something else with her.
“K-...Kisame,” she mutters, finding her tongue for the first time today. If she didn’t have all of his attention before, she does now.
“Yeah?” he answers in turn, short, quiet, lest he overwhelm. And then as her response, she climbs deeper into his sleeves, getting so deep it starts to stress the seams. Kisame’s grin wavers; she isn’t going to be able to slip into the torso of his cloak, she’s so small next to him. “Hold on,” he asks of her. He pulls away, but only for a moment. The clouds drift off his body and now drape around her. His sharp-tooth smile becomes lopsided at the sight, a woman swallowed up so easily by his coat. “Cozy enough?”
She nods...but then her grasp peeks from the pile of fabric. Kisame abides, giving her his hand again. There’s a pensiveness about her, amid all this mute talk. “...What’s on your mind?”
And while the woman knows it’s okay if she can’t answer...she does anyways.
“I’m afraid.”
A big, scary monster worth being frightened of feels a thousand different emotions pound his heart in the few seconds that pass.
“I’m afraid...of winter.”
...Oh.
The tailless beast ever so slightly feels himself relax; it isn’t him that scared her, at least not yet today. The swordsman follows her gaze out the shut door’s slats. A straight shot down the hall, some ways away, is a window with the glow of pure snow.
Kisame can’t protect her from something if he doesn’t know how. Despite himself, he has to pry:
“Why?”
“When...I was little,” she begins, and he can tell she’s somewhere else in that mind of hers. “A tree got knocked over and...and...and fell into my room while I-I-I was asleep. It wasn’t from snow...but…”
“The weight...of snow...could…”
“Oh, Takara-hime…” he melts. Little by little, he inches closer over her, snagged threads of hanging clothes brushing his tall hair as he does.
“The roof was never fixed. They-they-they put a tarp over it...and told me it’d be...okay.” And then even more hush, shame tangible in the air: “I slept in the closet for a long time...and then when my dad found out, I snuck...into the attic.”
“...That explains a lot,” the knight can’t help but murmur. But also...not quite. Something doesn't make sense, given all that. “But those were still just under the roof, I presume. Right?" She doesn't speak, and her eyes are nearly closed. "Why didn’t you go...lower…?”
“The yelling.”
Kisame realizes why she gets so small.
“I’m—...ah, shit…—” The awareness creeps up again, how close he is, the glossiness starting to steep over her lost eyes. An unseemly beast like him is the last thing she needs right now, recalling things so painful. He begins to back away, and his fingers almost slip out of hers...until...until…
The whole of her hand grips onto his index finger, so very desperately.
“I’m sorry,” she tells him, unable to meet his gaze. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be," he says immediately, but there's more that should be done. What can he do? What can a man like him do?
...If she doesn't want to let go, maybe the answer is that she just wants someone to listen.
“Why...why do you still go there?" he asks, leaning . "To the attic? And the closet, now…?”
“...I don’t know.” But she sort of does; it takes time for the thoughts to unthaw, coherency frozen within pain. “It’s more...familiar that way.” And unbelievably: "Belonged there."
But that doesn't make sense! “Even with the noises when the storms come? Princess..." Kisame begs, tilting towards her again. "You’re telling me...every night there was wind, you were up there...just waiting to see if the roof will fall in?”
“I’m sorry.”
With the way he looks so despondent right now, hearing the truth, maybe she should be sorry.
“Will you be here? With me?”
Locked in a closet, a man who will never be clean of the blood drenched into his very cells...and a woman so delicate a single breath could knock her down. Locked in a closet, a human and a beast. Her hands reach closer, climbing up his arm, even with no sleeve to snuggle into. Her palm rests upon the gill markings over his shoulder. Every second of her life, a piece of her has begged to be broken— broken enough to be worth fixing out of pity.
The familiarity and safety of the things that hurt you...that's a life Kisame knows.
He scoops her into his arms, onto his lap, and holds her. He holds her tight and tries not to cry. Her voice is muffled in his chest:
“Can I...tell you more?”
“Yes,” he answers, as softly as he can.
“The winter scares me,” she tells him again.
“Why?” he asks again, and he gets a different answer.
“I couldn’t leave the house.”
He’s going to crumble into a million pieces. As she tells her story, this embarrassing kind of suffering one can only make use of by weaving into art and song, he grimaces, lest tears fall into her hair.
“I tried to, twice. I laid down in the snow at the end of the back yard. I was on my belly and my face hurt.” Her head rests into his neck. How simply it's put...that's the worst part. “I wanted them to find me like that," she admits. "So I waited.”
All of a sudden, as he shuts his eyes, he can hear the wind howl like it's inside the closet with them.
He’s waiting right along side her, seeing himself, stark against the white mid-day precipitation, kneeling over a little girl pretending to be dead until it happens. He hears someone call her name, distantly, and it’s a word he doesn’t recognize— too fuzzy to make out. The world is empty, beside the rustle of snow falling from dead trees, and she is alone.
An eternity later, she narrates again. The child twitches, bit by bit, until little arms begin to pick herself up.
“I started to get hungry, and I gave up.”
Back in reality, outside of his imagination, Kisame holds her close in the closet, old scarves and coats being their curtains and soft pillows. A palm is on his chest, now, and she has moved from being face first into him to resting a cheek right over his heart. So near, he has to hide how stifled his breath is.
“The second time...I was older. I walked...and I walked...until I found a big hole in a tall tree. I went inside...and…”
...
Kisame in his mind looks into the hole, an arch of twisted wood circling someone curled up like a pill bug and waiting for the cold to take her and the tree to close in so she'd never be seen again.
“I waited again, but I didn’t expect anyone to find me.”
As he looks into the cave, Kisame asks the girl inside: “How’d you leave that time?”
...
“...I don’t know.”
But she does. The answer was stupid— at least felt that way at the time. Now she knows better. A head raises and looks ahead at Kisame; anyone who didn't know her better would think her eyes are dead. The truth is that a hope glistens behind her gaze. Bright or dim, it's always been there. The girl sighs, gets on her elbows and knees, and begins to worm her way back out.
“I started to think about the book I was reading...and then I got up and went home to finish it.”
And in his mind, he walks back with her, so close he could nearly hook one finger of hers into his. A small chuckle, one he can’t help, and he's back again, for good. He was never there, not really; silly fantasy to have, imagining yourself being there for a lovely person when they needed someone most. Things would have been very different if he got to meet her sooner...but it was not meant to be. But oh...what a terrible time to laugh, he recognizes. “I’m sorry,” he excuses, but she shakes her head.
“It’s okay." And though her voice is always kind, there's a pang in her bones as she gives him advice she wishes someone had told little her a long time ago. "No matter how big...or small...anything that keeps you alive is worth being alive for."
A fire is lit inside of him, the wick of a candle, a brightness in dark that’s been around him so long that he had forgotten the shadow itself was there, submerging him. It makes his stomach flip, the trajectory of his life changing forever.
He can be alive for her.
“When you get sad…” she asks, as if sensing now is the time, “What do you think about?”
A man so insistent on truth finds it hard to tell her after all of this. The truth is that he would just think about the sin, the shame, the realities that made him sad in the first place. He’d stew and mull and marinate in that guilt and hatred until the next fight came along, the next amusement. It is soaked into his very being, perhaps tainted into his soul. So he opts to answer a new way, about what he’s going to do in the future.
“When I get sad..." Kisame promises, "...I’ll think about you.”
“I...make you...happy?”
“...Yes,” he promises her. "You do make me happy."
“I love you.”
Said so quickly it could be an after thought. No hesitation, bravado, not even a shake in her voice. He’s already well lost in the weeds, sinking deeper and deeper into the way it feels to hold her close. She has said she loves him before, but this time is different.
Her hands cup his cheeks. She’s such easy prey right now to his hungry vices. ...It isn’t right. It isn’t fair. Just because he can fill up her world and claim her as his...doesn’t mean he should.
“...I’m not a guy worth loving,” he warns her, whispering. “I’m a killer. I’m the monster inside that I look on the outside, princess. You don’t know the kind of evil I’ve got inside of me.”
And just as before, two words take his reluctance to the grave.
“That’s okay.”
And then more take his ghost into her embrace:
“That makes it easier.”
Her hips straddle his lap, and as he breaks through his sea of darkness, he's gasps for air.
“Please don’t be mad at me,” she asks him, preemptively, seeing the shock in Kisame's expression. When faced with his silence, she goes on to confess. Her cheeks, even in the dim light, are so very, very flushed. “Every night I was alone in the dark, in the closet or the attic...I dreamed. I fantasized about...things that would take me away. People that weren’t...human. Evil, and mean...and soft just for me. It was...the only way I figured I could make it out alive. If someone saw I was hurt, scooped me up and took me away. Someone who...was capable of anything. Even...take care of someone like me.”
Her thumb brushes the corner of his mouth, those glistening carnivore teeth. Her pulse is racing, right to the very tip of that digit, and undeniably he feels it.
“Y-y-you’re...a dream...come...true.”
It hits him like a falling tree. She wants to be close to him, not in spite of his appearance, not at all.
“You make me feel...safe.”
And though maybe he could never be there to kill the ones who hurt her, protect a little girl so she wouldn’t be such a scared adult...it isn’t too late. He can be her warmth, her shell, her roof above her head. Underneath the barcode lights, she giggles in a strange combination of relief and anxiety.
"Please...don't be mad at me. I'm sorry."
It is so soft and sweet, and he can’t hold the beast in any longer. Either he has to break out of this room or break out of his chains. He makes the right choice.
Inching closer...and closer...his parted lips hover in front of her mouth, and he savors the sensation of the breath out of her nose falling over his skin. He, in turn, swaths her with the nearly inhuman warmth that he carries, like he just got out of a hot bath. He waits, just to give her time to pull away if she wanted, and then a woman who wants nothing more than to be stolen away gets her wish.
Their lips hardly brush, the sharpness behind his own gated from cutting her. Delicate...and reverent..and wonderful. Fingers comb into his indigo hair and an involuntary moan buzzes against her mouth. He tilts her backwards, one hand cupping the back of her head while the other holds her spine. Light and dark play over them both, and good and evil no longer have meaning. It's just love and being loved.
He would be lying if he said he never dreamed, as a naive little boy, that a girl like her could save him, too.
The sin they commit of wanting, even when unchained, is still so chaste. A long, savored moment of silence passes as a man embraces a woman out of utter, bittersweet bliss.  Nothing else exists but the princess and her knight.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
All my life's a panic trip, a rocket ship to planet schizoid
Hold me like a tourniquet, and I'll you, like an iron maiden
I've grown used to fear
But no, not to you yet, my dear
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Step.
Step.
And it’s a little darker inside the closet than before, a shadow in front of the slits.
“Takara-chan?" a familiar voice loudly coos. "Kisame-senPAI-?!”
Tobi opens the door, and the name man jolts straight up, knocking his head into the upper shelf with a hiss. "ACK! Dammit!" As the shark rubs his skull, hunched over an innocent lady, the masked man gets a big, long eyeful.
“Ohhh,” Tobi says, as if he understands. “You guys were stuck!”
Oh, thank the gods. “...Yeah,” Kisame grumbles, cracking open one fish eye. “Thanks for getting us out.”
The Akatsuki subordinate swings out a big, proud thumbs up. “You’rrrre welcome!”
...But now a new problem arises in Kisame's head. The daylight is washing over a woman who has obviously been crying, so heartbroken and vulnerable. Thankfully, Tobi has an excuse for that, too.
“Aw, Takara-chan...You’re okay now!” He kneels to her, not too far off from how the fish did. She’s mute again, but for another reason than fear. “Kisame protected you! See? He even wrapped you in his cloak.” Demonstratively, he dips his head into the black cloth and pops back out beside her, like threading a needle.
...But just as soon, it slips off.
"Oop!" Tobi says, tilting his head up to watch it— and the woman within— be picked up.
Before she knows it, the princess is lifted into the strong blue arms of an overpowered beast, proud to bare his fangs in a grin. He's ready to bite into a world that so much as dares to touch her. “That’s right, Tobi. Nothing could ever harm her when I’m around.”
And around he’ll be forever, if he gets any say on the matter. Maybe it'll make up for the fact he never got to carry her in another life.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
I'm not used to this
How did it happen, baby?
Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
The other half, I guess, I'm giving to you
Oh, baby
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
8 notes · View notes
kankuroplease · 26 days ago
Note
I don’t know if I missed any information in previous posts about her where you have answered this, if so I’m sorry for the repeat question.
I love chiha so much! As a little sister myself I cling onto little sister characters, and I am actually appalled at the fact that more characters don’t have younger siblings in naruto. Sorry that was a lot of typing just to not get to the point😅
In a previous post you said Gaara is not her type and sasuke is a no no, so is there an example of a canon/oc character that is her type or maybe a ship you already have setup?
Also if it’s not too much to ask what are her relationships like with some of the other characters (team10, team8, etc…)
These questions are more for your new au, but I completely understand if I’m thinking too far ahead
Very sorry about the length of this
In general, Chiha loves being the youngest to as it gets her out of trouble (no one suspects the youngest) and it’s fun to give Naruto a little sister
In this au, she’s still a menace, she’s just more small town coded
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Sasuke
Chiha would definitely have a huge crush on bull rider Sasuke. He’s in a cowboy hat, keeps cats, let her feed the baby animals, never complained about her tagging along, gave her his old guitar (which yeah, she read too much into), and she’s not blind 🤣 (the main thing she doesn’t like about him in TSAU is that he is hung up on another girl and would tie her down to the city she wants to leave). They just get in stupid arguments because Chiha doesn’t know how to handle having a crush/her crush being so popular and they both have tempers.
Sakura
She ADORES Sakura so much. She helped Chiha practice to get on the cheer team, taught her how to do her makeup, and how to throw a mean punch. Sakura Graduating early and going to college meant she didn’t get to spend her teen years with her pseudo big sis, but they called and texted regularly so they are still very close.
While she likes Kisame as a person, she’s bummed that once again, Sakura is leaving her in the dust with different life stages. So she doesn’t spend too much time with the happy couple.
Shikamaru
Or Nara, as she calls him, don’t have much to do with each other. She’s convinced he’s the laziest cowboy ever and she’s not sure why him and Naruto are friends or what Temari sees in him 🤨
Choji
He is Menma’s friend and her favorite rodeo clown tbh. She’s so happy that he’s always willing to share snacks with her and always gestures for her to take a deep breath when she’s nervous in the arena. Good friend 10/10
Ino
Ino’s family was on a whole different level to the rest of their town financially and Ino was this spoiled rich girl that got to go live in a city, so she really doesn’t know her. Chiha is very sucked to see her again in this au as a regular girl
Tenten
Tenten is her other pseudo big sis that thought her how to lasso ~~she could’ve asked Naruto or Sasuke, but that was embarrassing as a kid when she said she already knew how~~ and let her borrow her moms old records to play when she was little.
Tenten and Chiha often run into each other for different town events as Chiha is a singer and Tenten does bar tending too. So they usually catch up at those functions if not at the rodeo.
Lee
He will always have a hero’s cape as her first actual dance partner (bros don’t count at parties). It was awkward as heck being a wallflower and then he came along and asked her to dance 🥹 they’ve developed a great friendship due seeing each other during Naruto’s training and even have a secret handshake
Kakashi
He’s a legendary bull rider from their town and Naruto’s mentor. She doesn’t know much about him, but he’s kinda always been around because he knows her parents?? All she knows everyone wants him and he can carry a note, so he better get his butt on stage and do these duets so she can make more money/get more attention 🤣
She also doubles as his errand girl during rodeos do to his injuries that have left him sidelined this season.
Obito
All she knows about is that before he was a rodeo clown/announcer, he was also a bull rider and that some big bad bull ended that career.
Oh and he’s loaded and his wife is too hot and cool for him, but his son is cute.
Konan
Obito’s wife that doesn’t do box seats even though she could. Anytime they’re around her hometown, she hears a lot of whispers and rumors about her, but Chiha doesn’t really care to listen to them.
Konan seems cool and she often sees her (and her kid) sitting with Kakashi and Gai.
Gai
He’s that funny guy that’s always around Kakashi and has a positive outlook on things. She likes finding new dad jokes to tell him because he always laughs like it’s the funniest thing.
Kisame
He’s cool for a cop, she guesses. The only times they interact really is when Sakura comes to see her perform
Gaara
He is not cool. She tried the clueless cute act and he gave her a ticket anyways. He’s not cool and he’s not that cute, she doesn’t care what anyone says 💀
Zabuza
Chiha is so freakin’ scared of him. His aura is intense, but he’s another poplar cowboy who unlike Sasuke and Kakashi, will actually sign things for her (she resales it).
He thinks she’s a big fan of his and she’d like to keep it that way (for the money)
Haku
This beauty. Honestly only met him because Naruto gave her, Zabuza’s number one fan, his number to pass on to Haku. They’re just getting to know each other, but they have swapped jackets, so Chiha considers him a friend ✨
Hinata
Like Ino, she never actually met Hinata. She saw her here and there when she was younger because she and Menma were close, but now she sees her every Saturday morning on her cooking show. Girls supporting girls and what not.
Seems like a sweet girl and her and her mother will try to recreate some of the dishes for fun. She teases Menma about it being his old gfs recipe and tells him he should try reaching out to her 😏
Asuma
Her old high school principal. He wrote her a letter of recommendation when she asked (that she never used) 😭
As for her type, she just likes people that are free thinking and will show her (and only her) affection~
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itachis-husband-blog · 5 months ago
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Kisame inhaled and moved to stroke Itachi’s cheek with the back of his index finger. This time, Itachi didn’t flinch and leaned into the touch. “Will you let me help you? I know you’re frustrated with the timing of things but please don’t push me away. I want to help you.”
“It’s not intentional…” He whispered and reached up to clasp Kisame’s hand in his own.
“I know.” Kisame whispered back. “You’ve got a lot on your plate and there’s a lot we don’t know about each other yet.”
“But we’re running out of time.” He reminded him.
“That’s one way to look at it.” Kisame replied and shifted his hand to gently caressed the corners of his mouth with his thumb. From this position, he could also access the bottom of Itachi’s earlobe which elicited a flinch from the younger man. “But a lot could happen in the time we have left.”
Itachi’s dark eyes fluttered open to meet Kisame’s golden ones. “Like what?”
His eyes danced from left to right as he entertained what seemed to be a list of ideas. Some garnered a pensive look, others a mischievous glint, and some a fond smile. Perhaps this was all speculative as he never put words to what he was thinking of and instead, settled on an expression Itachi couldn’t quite describe.
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suvidrache · 1 year ago
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Dancing In Front Of Them - Part 1
age in bio when interacting. minors do not interact.
Word Count: 323 / Read it on AO3 | Offline Version | Part 2
Featuring: Deidara, Hidan, Kakuzu, Kisame, & Nagato (Pain)
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Deidara
If he's in the middle of an art project, his attention is elsewhere. As long as he is not being disturbed, it's fine.
Once he's finished, he may either join in or simply watch as you dance.
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Hidan
Before the relationship even began, you should know how Hidan is.
He's going to make sexual remarks, try to touch you, and may even ask for a lap dance.
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Kakuzu
If he's counting his money when you begin. He's not going to pay attention until he has finished.
Unless you turn your music up loud. If there happens to be a stripper pole involved, he would be shocked. Look around to make sure the both of you are alone and may make it rain one-dollar bills.
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Kisame
Will smiled as he sits back to watch the show.
He may join you if you ask him to.
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Nagato (Pain)
Thinks that you are immature if it is a silly/fun dance.
However, he would also join you.
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© SUVIDRACHE — do not copy, translate, modify, or plagiarize my work. reblogs are appreciated!
Tag List: @eli-chris / Join My Tag List Here!
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