#dad Frankie morales
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josephquinnswhore ¡ 2 years ago
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Baby Blues
Pairing: Frankie Morales x female reader.
Summary: Frankie comes home late to find you struggling and wants to make it up to you.
Word count: 1.1k
Warnings: postpartum depression. completely self indulgent.
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It felt irrational, the resentment you felt for Frankie, his freedom to be able to just leave the house whenever he wanted, catch up with his friends and have a night away from the never ending duties you were overwhelmed with.
Realistically 3 hours wasn’t a long time, especially for Frankie, when he met up with the guys he was normally gone a lot longer, you would’ve felt grateful if you weren’t so tired and withdrawn. Unfortunately for Frankie you weren’t in the mood for anything to do with him when he got home. Everything he did annoyed you; the way he closed the door, kicked his boots off and stumbled in the darkness into the table that made a horrible screeching noise across the wooden floor. Your baby had been crying on and off for a few hours, constantly wanting to be held, nursed and rocked, long story short you were fucking exhausted. You needed help, you had rang Frankie a few times and left a voice message which he never replied to, typically.
When he walked behind you to try and slide his arms around your waist you snapped, angry tears falling down your cheeks, rage consuming you faster than a forest fire, your fussy baby wailing at your sudden movement. You groaned in frustration and gave Frankie a stern look through your tears, his face and the room illuminated a light yellow hue from your babies nightlight. You didn’t miss the frown that wrinkles his face as you pull away from him, confused by the tears and rejection.
“Let me take him baby.” In your unreasonable state, you scoff, rolling your eyes as you away gently to rock the baby back to sleep. “Don’t bother Frankie, I got it, like always. I don’t need your help.” You couldn’t ignore the way your heartstrings were stretched out at the way Frankie’s face dropped, a sadness that etched onto his face made you feel a pang of guilt in your chest.
“Is this because I went out? Baby I asked, I made sure before I left that it was okay.” You set your baby down in his bassinet, patting his bum a few times before tuning on his nighttime music, the sweet lullaby caused your own eyelids to droop as you exit the room, shutting the door. “It’s not that you left, frankie! You didn’t pick up the phone, I rang and left messages. I needed you and you just, weren’t there.”
Frankie took two steps forward and stretched his arms around your neck, pulling you into him and his warmth, his fleece flannel was soft on your skin, hot tears wetting the material. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry baby.” His hands are running up and down your back, tracing mindless shapes in hopes to calm you down from your overwhelmed state. “Go to bed baby, I’ll take it from here.” You bit your lip and shake your head no, feeling guilty for snapping at him. “I’m sorry for getting so mad I just-“ frankie presses a soft kiss to your lips, one that lasts barely seconds but lingers afterwards. “Don’t finish that sentence, you don’t deserve to carry this weight alone, go to bed baby.”
“Okay, I love you.” You mumble tiredly, voice croaking from the breakdown you just endured. You tread to bed and the softness of the mattress swallows you, your limbs ache ceasing once your head hits the pillow, pulling the covers over you as the fan gently whirrs in the background, the cool air on your face lulls you to sleep within the minute.
When you wake up, it’s by your own accord, not from a baby screaming, frankie showering or your alarm blaring, you wake up naturally feeling refreshed and body free from pain, your mind clear and spirit refreshed. You stretch for a few seconds, groaning at how good it feels before walking into your sons room, his bassinet was empty, but it was well made and folded semi-neatly. His pacifier and teddy sitting nicely in the corner.
Down the hall, the living room was spotless, it had been mopped, vacuumed and the appliances had been wiped down, there were two baskets on the lounge, one folded neatly of a mix of your own and Frankie’s clothes, the other being of your sons, smelling like fresh lavender.
The kitchen made you gasp, the dishes were washed and packed away, bottles had been washed, sanitised and prepped. Frankie had even made breakfast, well-brunch, considering the time you read on the microwave reads 11:28am.
“Why didn’t you wake me up?” You question, voice clear but soft towards him. He smiles as he makes you a plate of your favourite breakfast foods, he’s wearing your baby carrier and your son is propped up with his face against Frankie’s chest. “You deserved it baby, after all you do for us. It was hard..” you sit down across from him at the dining table, waiting for him to continue, “I didn’t realise how hard it was, how much it takes out of you to do all these things. You do them everyday too, you know. I’m sorry I’ve been taking you for granted.” Your son coos in his sleep, the gentle vibration of Frankie’s chest as he speaks comforts the baby.
Your hand reaches over the food to place it on top of Frankie’s, “we have to do this together baby otherwise we won’t make it, it’s too hard for either of us to do alone, can I count on you?” Frankie’s thumb is caressing your hand, dark circles mark his under eyes and his wrinkles more prominent as each minute passes that he’s awake, his hair prodding in every direction from running his hair through it. “I promise you can baby, we’re in this together.” You sigh in relief at Frankie’s confession, glad to see some real progress in him wanting to be more involved in the harder parts of being a parent.
“I love you Frankie. Go get some rest hun, I’ll take him.” Frankie looks at you as he struggles to keep his eyelids from closing, “are you sure?” You huff and roll your eyes playfully, “go before you fall asleep at the table and crush out baby,” you assure, unclipping the carrier from the back and at his waist, cradling your son in your arms, he groans quietly as he readjusts in your arms. Frankie kisses your forehead and heads straight for the lounge, knowing he won’t make it to the bedroom without passing out from exhaustion. You have to give it to him; for his first all nighter he did amazing; it impressed you.
You hoped it would be the first of many. Seeing Frankie be so good at being a dad almost made you want another baby, almost.
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stargirl-in-dilfspace ¡ 8 months ago
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Look After You (Christmas Fic) - Francisco “Catfish” Morales x Reader
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[moodboard for moodboard’s sake]
Summary: It’s the first time you’ve had Frankie home for the entire month of December, and you have some exciting news for him.
content/warnings: fluff, established relationship, reader & frankie are married, they have a daughter, girl dad frankie, classic christmas (no sad beige bullshit here), reader is pregnant, pregnancy announcement, their daughter is rambunctious & sweet, daughter is named Valentina (Val for short), Santiago appearance, alcohol mention (santi and frank have a beer lol), these two are so sweet you wanna throw up [2k-ish words]
a/n: okay first fic on tumblr, this feels weird. and yeah it’s wayyyy too early for Christmas but i hate that it’s snowing where i am and im pretending im happy about it (aka writing fics about Christmas) let me know what you think!!! <3
Christmas had stopped being a time to relax a long time ago. Even more so once you had your daughter. And your husband. But, Frankie was plenty of help, this evening, among many others, he’d offered to completely take over the bedtime duties for Valentina, that you normally split 50/50, so you could have some time to yourself, which you opted to wrap gifts.
It was the 23rd, and the wrapping was a little late admittedly. He’d offered everything under the sun, a hot bath, a home cooked meal, etc. You’d chosen to wrap gifts. This was the first year you got to spend the entire month with him. And Val was three. You settled down on your bed, with a bunch of gift bags, wrapping paper and a few bows. The gifts you planned for your daughter on your left, and a few for your husband on the right.
By 7 o’clock, you’d wrapped everything. Gift tags were what you had left. In your hand writing, you started to write your first name. On your daughter’s gift. You silently laughed at yourself, trying again, with a different tag, addressing it to Val, from Mama.
You’d never get used to it in the best of ways.
You smiled at the tag, feeling stupid. Stupidly happy. The amount of joy that children got out of Christmas, would last forever, and seeing the joy from your daughter made all the work worth it.
Then you got down to your husband’s little stack. A few useful items he’d asked for, a book he’d wanted, and a framed photo of the two of you. One from the day you told him you were pregnant with Val. Taken on a digital camera, he’s smiling wide, genuinely, while you press a kiss to his cheek. He had been trying to find time to get all the photos printed off the camera and frame some, specifically that one to put on his nightstand. You wrapped that last.
Cause that wasn’t the only part of the gift. You had a letter, and more importantly, a pregnancy test.
A positive pregnancy test.
You looked at it for a moment, you only found out a few days ago, and decided you’d surprise him on Christmas Eve, with the photo.
A swift knock was put on the bedroom door, to which you hid everything at your side, throwing your sweater over it. “Francisco Morales if you walk in here you may not live to see Christmas Day.” You call out, in a joking tone, as the door cracked open.
“Hey there, Mrs. Catfish.” You place the voice immediately. Santiago. “Heard you were wrapping gifts in here?”
“Yeah, you’re safe.” You chuckle lightly, standing up off the bed to hug him as he stepped in to greet you. “What’re you doing here?” You wrap your arms around him with a smile on your face.
“Holy…shit.” You furrow your brows, hearing his tone as you pull back, following his gaze. Fuck. “Looks like it’s Mama Fish of two.” He chuckled, looking back at you with a smile before you shushed him quickly.
He got a kick out of the nickname he’d come up with when he’d found out about Val.
“Yeah, looks like it.” You smile, the reality kicking in a little. “Frankie’s supposed to find out Christmas Eve so keep it zipped.” He chuckles again, taking it to heart.
“How far along?” He asks as you made an effort to finish putting everything neatly into its little box, and labeling it with his name.
“Four weeks. Only found out on the 19th.” You say quietly, stuffing presents into the closet, behind some storage boxes, stacking a few spare blankets over it for good measure.
“Damn.”
“Don’t even do the math, Santiago.” You warn with a fake scowl.
“Guess me taking Val for the weekend paid off.” He jokes as you shoot him a look, opening the door and leading him back out into the hall to the living room to find Frankie.
The Christmas lights on the tree were plugged in, blues, red, purples, oranges, greens, yellows…you’d refused to give in to the sad beige trends, you wanted your daughter to have the Christmas you did. Full of life and color, and strange ornaments with memories and crafts and photos. Frankie was in the kitchen in the fridge, digging for drinks.
“You found her?” He calls to Santi, to which he replies with a simple “yep.” “Either of you want a beer?” He asks, Santi gave you a look to which you held up a finger in warning.
“No, honey, just water for me.” You reply, and he came into the living room a few moments later, two beers and a water. You thanked him and smiled, sitting down next to him on the couch while Santiago sat in one of your armchairs.
You spent the rest of the evening talking, catching up and laughing. Your daughter slept like a rock, and eventually you checked on her, making sure she actually was asleep. She was the spitting image of both of you, snoring softly. Your pride and joy, you never thought any man would ever make you feel safe and loved enough to have a child, a home.
The last two weeks, you’d been watching Christmas movies with Val and Frankie, curled up on the couch, as she got all excited about Christmas, and winter, and presents.
Last night, she’d begged to make cookies she’d found in an old cookbook of yours. Gingerbread cookies the three of you decorated to look like each other, accompanying the little house she decorated. She passed out from a sugar high on the couch between you and Frankie at only 6 in the evening. A miracle, for a girl like her. He’d talked to you about how much he loved the two of you, quietly playing with your hair, for almost an hour before you both fell asleep.
By the time Santiago left, you both were tired, like average toddler parents were. You drag a blanket from the back of the couch, pulling it up and over the two of you, curling up with him for a minute.
“Good day?” Frankie asks, like clockwork each night he wanted to hear what you had to say. His eyes reflect the Christmas lights, and somehow every ounce of admiration and love he held for you.
“Good day. Got all the presents wrapped.”
“I’m glad, all ready for Christmas?” He rubbs your arm, pulling you closer.
“Very. You?” You look up at him, hand finding his soft brown curls, you see him wear more frequently now. Standard Oil practically owned his head of hair until you came along and convinced him the curls and little grays were perfect to you.
“I think so. Wrapped your gifts last week.” He grins down at you, hand falling at your waist, fingertips grazing your back and pulling you just a bit closer. You smile at him, God, you love him. His eyes shine a little more in the light of the tree, pulling you up to kiss him sweetly, your hand pressed gently to the side of his face.
“I love you.” You murmur, reaching just a bit farther up to press a kiss to the tip his nose, one of many things you adore about him.
“I love you, hun.” He kisses your cheek in return, letting you rest on his shoulder, just against his neck. You play with the hem of his shirt, yawning slightly. “How’s a hot shower and bed sound?” He asks with a slight chuckle, you can feel it deep in his chest, with his heartbeat. The one he knows beats just for you.
By the next evening, dinner is served, chicken (considering your daughter won’t touch turkey), mashed potatoes (her favorite), and green beans (cause somebody needed her greens.)
“Mama, do we get to open presents tonight?” Your daughter asks, her spoon spinning around in her potatoes.
“Only one, since Santa hasn’t come yet, sweetheart.” You grin, watching her take another bite, smiling at you and Frankie.
“Do you think I’ll be able to hear the reindeer? When he’s on the roof? Cause I can’t see Santa?” Val asks, pulling her hair out of the little ponytail done by Frankie from earlier when she’d “helped” him outside shovel the snow on the sidewalk, messy from her little hat.
“I don’t know about that…but I heard Santa has been leaving behind something extra special if we leave him some milk and cookies tonight.” Frankie smiles, explaining to his daughter what she could expect if she tried to stay in her bed and sleep.
“Hmm…I think we should get to bed soon, Val cause Uncle Santi called before dinner and told me Santa had already come to his house.” You hum like it's nothing, and your daughter shoots up, finishing the remainder of her plate, and Frankie smiles at you.
“Can we go get my pjs? And brush my teeth? I wanna go to bed!” Val forgets she could even have one present tonight.
She takes Frankie’s hand, tugging it a little, watching you for approval. She drags both of you, through her bedtime routine like you usually have to do for her. You kiss her goodnight, and tell her Christmas will be there the sooner she goes to sleep, and that you love her. You lean on the doorframe, watching Frankie talk to her, telling her goodnight and that he loves her.
Your hand finds your abdomen without really thinking. Jesus Christ do you love him, and God are you glad to be the one having his children.
You quickly tuck both hands in the pockets of your jeans as he turns to you, walking out with you. He takes your hand, leading you back to the living room.
“I’ve got something for you.” You say softly, he presses a kiss to your head. You reach under the couch, as you’d hidden it earlier in the day, and he chuckles a little. You hand him the box and settle with your legs over his lap, he brushes your knees with his free hand. He looks at you to see if it’s okay to open, his hands making the box look much smaller than it was. You nod, encouraging him a little, a small smile on your lips.
He shakes off the top, pushing back the wrapping and looking at you, a large grin on his face, taking up the photo frame, setting the box beside him. He pulls you in tightly, still holding the framed photo. “I’ve been meaning to do this, this is amazing, thank you-”
“Frankie, I’d take another look in the box before you thank me, honey.” You joke slightly, he lets go of you, giving you a confused look, taking the box back up, taking back some more of the wrapping, he looks back up at you, his eyes wide, and you don’t even know how his smile got better. He wraps you up in his arms again, pulling you up to hold you as close as he can.
You’re every good piece of him, you’re the one thing he could ever dream to have.
“We’re having another baby!” He’s impossibly happy, excited and holding you tight, kissing you repeatedly before you can even say another word. “I’m a dad, again…” He lets you go a little to look at you, glancing down at your stomach, and back to your eyes. “Thank you…”
Those big, brown eyes and that smile, that got you here in the first place.
You’re smiling, blushing with how excited he is. He pulls you back in, once again, elated, with little tears at the corner of his eye, holding you close. The only place he wants to be.
“I- I’m only four weeks. Only found out a few days ago, just wanted to surprise you.” You stumble over your words, and he kisses the side of your face, still holding you but loose, so you could breathe, and he could look at you.
“It’s amazing. It’s more than amazing, it’s the best fucking Christmas gift.” He grins at you, hands rubbing your arms up and down as if to warm you. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too, Francisco.” You just about melt into his arms, his comfort the same as a blanket while it snowed outside.
He made you happier than you could’ve ever believed you deserved, let alone believed you would find. And yet, he reminded you somehow everyday of how much he didn’t deserve you.
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daddy-dins-girl ¡ 1 year ago
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Pedro Boys "During a Fire Emergency"
As requested by @within-the-depths
Have a prompt? Send me an ask or leave a reply!
related posts: Pedro Boys "Nice Argument. Unfortunately," Pedro Boys "Don't Fuck This Up" Pedro Boys "Dad(dy) Matrix" Pedro Boys & Stabbing Pedro Boys "Lawful/Neutral/Chaotic" Pedro Boys "Feral/Sad/Angelic" Pedro Boys Respond to "I love you." Pedro Boys "Character Tropes" Pedro Boys "Gay/Depressed/Horny on Main" Pedro Boys "Dad/THOT/Bastard" Pedro Boys "bring some Coke to the party" Pedro Boys "Zombie Apocalypse Team" Pedro Boys "I Want a Baby" Pedro Boys "As Babysitters" Pedro Boys "As McDonald's Dads" Pedro Boys "in a horror movie" Pedro Boys "Cinnamon Rolls" Pedro Boys "5 Kids, 3 Chairs" Pedro Boys "Playing Monopoly"
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joelsflannel ¡ 11 months ago
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merry christmas, cariĂąo
or joelsflannel presents: a frankie morales christmas
masterlist
pairing: frankie morales x wife!reader rating: absolute tooth-rotting fluff warnings/tags: husband!frankie, dad!frankie, frankie is a girl dad and I stand by that, very fluffy, morales family christmas, kaleigh uses lots of words to say not that many things, blink and you'll miss it barely a reference to TF canon events, not one but TWO sets of big, brown, baby cow eyes, no mentions of religion or anything outside of presents and santa. reader has no specified appearance, pictures are included for aesthetic purposes only. word count: 351 (she's just a baby, your honor) summary: mom and dad get woken up for presents ofc.
A/N: merry pedromas @frenchiereading!! surprise, I'm your pedrostories secret santa and I hope you enjoy your moodboard as much as I enjoyed making it. I couldn't help myself at the thought of christmas girl dad!frankie so I had to write a little blurb. It's a little cheesy but hey, 'tis the season ❤️🎄
dividers by the amazing @saradika
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Peaceful. The morning starts out peaceful, the comforting weight of Frankie’s arm holding you impossibly close as the light begins to shine through the curtains. The soft sounds of snores and a smell so warm, inviting, and uniquely Frankie fills your senses and provide a soothing soundtrack for the start of the day. Turning in his grip, you can’t help but admire the sleeping face of your husband. Tracing a gentle finger over the scruff of his jaw with an almost reverent gaze. The way his mouth parts slightly and the ever-present worry lines between his eyebrows fade with the warm embrace of sleep. The peace doesn’t last long, replaced by the sound of small feet pattering down the hall and sweet giggles growing closer before the door swings open. 
“Mama! Daddy! He came, he came!” The excitement in your daughter’s voice is enough to stir Frankie’s sleeping form, his arms tightening around you one last time before sitting up. His sleepy eyes sparkle in a way that melts your heart into a puddle. The perfect father, the way he grabs hold of his little girl and litters her small face with kisses, matching brown eyes caught in a battle of who can out puppy dog eye who. After a few minutes of laughter and your daughter deciding that you make a great tickle target (read: your daughter begging to go downstairs to unwrap her presents from Santa), you finally make your way downstairs. Spoiler alert: her puppy dog eyes win every time. 
It’s been a long year, one made exponentially better by the warmth brought by your little family. The little giggles, the sound of wrapping paper being torn open to reveal months of hard work met with bright eyes, the feeling of Frankie’s arms wrapping around you as the two of you curl up on the couch and watch your daughter play with her new toys. She’s completely entranced by them, only tearing her attention away to look up every now and then with a “Mama, Daddy, look!!” that warms your heart in a way that no fire could hold a candle to. 
“Merry Christmas, Santa.” you turn your head to look up at Frankie, those strong arms tightening as your eyes meet his. He shakes his head with a laugh before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, “Merry Christmas, cariño.”
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mothandpidgeon ¡ 3 months ago
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Imagine your toddler becomes friends with Franny at the playground. They like collecting acorns together. She’s always there with her abuela who’s very sweet to you because she understands how hard it is for single parents.
Imagine Frankie’s mom comes to lend a hand when he has Franny. It’s been tough taking care of a 2 year old with work and on top of it all, he’s in recovery. Sometimes when Franny’s with her mom, he still comes home to find his mamá standing in his kitchen cooking something that smells delicious. His laundry is cleaned and folded. She promises she’ll stop doing that but she never does.
Imagine one day she can’t make it and Frankie’s on his own, a little overwhelmed, but Franny’s begging to go to the park. “I go slide!”
Imagine you’re holding the acorn bucket at the playground when you see Franny in her stroller being pushed along by a big, broad-shouldered man with those gorgeous brown eyes that must run in the family.
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pedroshotwifey ¡ 2 months ago
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Ok, random idea for drabble:
Overprotective girldad! Frankie
He and the guys get together to size up/intimidate the guy coming by to pick up his daughter for a date. 😅
Okay I'm really kind of loving this idea 🤣
Think I had way too much fun with it!
W/C: 660
Overprotective girldad!Frankie (G)
They could be doing anything right now. Bowling, flying, fishing, hiking, shooting pool, drinking—well, you get the idea. They could be doing anything on this cool Friday night, but the former Delta Team boys are sitting around the island in Frankie’s cramped kitchen, waiting for his daughter’s date to show up. 
“Frankie,” Benny speaks up for the group. “You have got to give her some slack, dude.” 
The glare Frankie sends the younger man’s way makes the rest of the guys glad Benny said it first. Benny—being Benny—doesn’t get the hint. 
“I mean, c’mon, she’s nineteen.” He tosses another handful of peanuts into his mouth, continuing his risky  and unwanted opinion with a mouth full of food. “And a grown adult.” 
For the sake of his good friend, Frankie pretends not to hear and goes back to scoping out his front lawn through the living room window. He peers out the temporary crack he’s made in the blinds for another couple of minutes, and then suddenly jumps away. 
“Little shit’s finally here,” Frankie grumbles as he walks past the group, glancing at his watch. “Minute and a half late.” He marches to the front door. 
Knowing that’s their queue to follow, the men eye each other before sliding off the barstools and gathering around their paranoid friend. It would be comical to see Frankie so worked up over this kid if he weren’t so serious about it. He’s absolutely convinced that there is no boy out there good enough for his little girl, and there is not a breathing soul on this earth that could change his mind. 
So they huddle up in their most intimidating stance, Santi to the left of Frankie, Benny to the right, and Will behind and between Frankie and Ben. If for no other reason than to make sure Frankie doesn’t give off “Little Man Syndrome” energy all by himself, they puff their chests, stand tall, and put on stern faces. 
The poor kid doesn’t even get to knock before Frankie pulls the door open. One glance at the guys, and he looks about ready to piss his pants—which really only proves Frankie’s point. 
“M-Mr. Morales?” The kid squeaks, doing his damndest to only focus on Frankie, and holds his hand out to shake. “I’m Tyler, here to pick your daughter up for—” he stutters when Frankie raises a brow— “for our date.” 
Frankie stares for a second, and the kid—Tyler—just about breaks down. 
“I-I mean, not our date, but y-your daughter’s. O-obviously. And mine—me and your daughter, our date.” 
Santi glances at Will, who is already side-eyeing Santi. That look conveys exactly what they’re both thinking: someone should really put this guy out of his misery. Luckily, Charlotte appears at the top of the stairs at that exact moment. 
“Oh my god, Dad!” She bursts out. “Stop making Tyler feel weird!” 
And it’s like a switch is flipped in Frankie. He turns around, smile bright on his face for his daughter. None of the guys are phased—this is how these things usually go. 
“Of course I’m not, sweetheart! Tyler and I actually just finished up a great conversation.” He turns back to the boy, still cheery. “Isn’t that right, sport?” 
Tyler, who looks like he should probably drink some water, quickly nods. “Yes, absolutely,” he agrees. 
Charlotte scoffs, not totally buying it, and quickly hurries the rest of the way downstairs. Before she reaches the torture circle at the front doorway, Frankie smiles one last time at Tyler. 
“Hurt her, and see what happens,” he says, just loudly enough for the kid to hear, and in a tone that would sound joking to anybody else. 
A hug for his daughter and a (possibly too aggressive) pat on the shoulder for Tyler later, the kids are headed down the driveway, one a tad more stiff than the other. 
“Be back by nine,” Frankie calls after them. 
Will glances at the clock and sighs. It’s 8:12pm. 
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soulreader05 ¡ 9 months ago
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Pedro Pascal Characters: *Just Existing.*
Me and my kid ocs : That’s our dad.
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josephquinnswhore ¡ 5 months ago
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hiking - joel miller x female reader
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summary: as a family, you go on a hike with your daughter.
word count: 1k
content warning: joel wanting to have another baby omlll, NO smut. Fluff!! Dad joel.
a/n: the second photo (of the waterfall) is my own. Do not edit or repost without permission!!!! Took this today while on a hike hehe.
The burning ache in your calves serve as a reminder to you that you’re not the woman you once were. Activities like this, hiking, walking along a perfectly cured tar track was more of an effort than it had ever been. You’d grown a bit slack in your usual adventures, ones that are demanding now; were so simple back then.
Now, there’s the ache in your back that hasn’t left since you’d entered your third trimester years ago, it’s a constant reminder of why you haven’t had a second child after Sarah.
An ache constricts in your chest, pneumonia wracks your lungs, burning and causing strain on your breathing. You carry a small bag on your back, a few water bottles and some snacks for Sarah, not to mention your asthma puffer. Joel had insisted, in case you’d collapse, he was more worried than your mother most days.
He didn’t want you out of the house, his face almost turning white when you’d brought up the idea of going hiking like this, for the first time since Sarah had been born, nonetheless. She was almost three now. He’d been keeping a close eye on you, turning back to make sure you’re okay. Offering that subtle smile, supportive.
The tar track is slippery, bright green moss has grown in between the cracks of the concrete, making it slippery. You’re conscious of it now, making a mental note to watch your step.
“Nearly there darlin’, you’re doin’ great.” Joel praised softly as he stopped, turning back to wait for you, where you linger a few paces back, keeping a mindful eye on Sarah to make sure she didn’t wonder off track. Joel had her though, he did. He was always aware, always scanning for anything that could or might be a threat or hazard to his little girl.
“C’here baby girl. Hold daddies hand.” He’d murmur for the tenth time, his giant hand contorts around her own, and Sarah giggles.
The sight warms your heart, swelling with pride and adoration. This was your family, your husband. You’d picked the right man, you’d known it since you met him.
“Come on mommy!” Sarah fleets with joy and excitement. It’s enough for you to push through the burn on each inhale.
“I’m gonna get ya baby!” You put your hands up, mocking a monster, roaring as you take big stomps towards her as she tries to drag Joel along to run.
“Run daddy, run! Mommy’s a scary monster!” Joel plays along, gasping dramatically as he lets Sarah lead him up the path.
The sound of water is thunderous and distracting, too loud for Sarah to keep up her charade of playing monsters. She tilts her head. “What’s that noise?”
“That’s the waterfall, baby, what we came to see.” Joel explains, pointing to the huge waterfall. It’s hundreds of meters deep, the water is brown, rushing through the rocks down into the pool of stagnant water below, where the water begins to foam. A small family of ducks occupy the water.
Sarah squeals in joy as she sees a peek of the waterfall from her height, the trees obscure her view. “I wanna see! I wanna see more daddy!”
“Just a few more steps baby, then we can get a real good look.” Joel encourages with a big toothy smile, turning to you, ensuring you get the hint that the encouragement was meant for you too.
The lookout is stunning, fenced all around, and safe. You remember the view, from before you fell pregnant. It hadn’t changed a bit. The rain sprinkles down onto you, and Sarah rushes up to see the waterfall.
“Wow. Water!” She exclaims, trying to show Joel. “Look daddy, a bird!”
It’s clear she was in awe of how many animals she’d seen, pointing out every duck, bird and bug she could see.
Lifting Sarah up against your chest, you give her a better view, clear of the obstruction of the fence. One her little body couldn’t yet compromise. “Ain’t that pretty?” You murmur softly to her, pressing a small kiss to her cheek.
“Turn around darlin’.” Joel calls softly, getting your attention, you turn around and Joel’s getting his new phone out. An iPhone he was still learning to use for work.
He fumbled for a second before snapping a family photo of all of you. “We’re gonna have to find room on the wall for this,” he hums.
“Show me that,” you scold lightly, and you grimace once you see the photo. Your cheeks are red and you look sick. You are sick—but that’s besides the point.
Joel knows you’re about to protest, to whinge or huff. “You look beautiful. This is us remaking memories with out little girl. Maybe good enough to have another?” He pries softly.
He’s been bugging you for another baby. You almost give in.
“My backs already killing me,” a simple reminder and he makes a noise of resignation. “But I didn’t say no,” you murmur. The thought of a second baby was on your mind too.
His brown eyes twinkle with hope. He’d have to bring this up later at home.
The rain trickles down a little harder, and Sarah starts to get a little unsettled. It’s cold and wet and the wind is picking up. “Come on baby, let’s walk back to the car.” You offer your hand out for her to hold, and Sarah shakes her head, tears welling up in her brown eyes.
“No! Cuddle!” She demands, holding her arms up for you to pick up her.
“I can’t baby, you know mommy can’t carry you all the way back,” you explain softly.
Joel steps in. He won’t allow you to pick Sarah up while you’re sick, or while your back hurts.
“Daddy will put you up on his shoulders, how’s that sound baby?” Sarah looks up at him and nods, her cheeks and nose are turning red.
He swings her up, and she sits on his shoulders, she clings onto the curls on top his head. Your fingers fumble to find your phone in your jumper pocket, snapping an image, unbeknownst to Joel.
“You gonna make it back?” Joel asked, concern abrupt in his tone.
“I’ll be okay.” You reassure softly. “Let’s get going.”
Maybe—you would do this more often from now on.
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dilfsgonedoughy ¡ 11 months ago
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Frankie’s had a bit too much to drink
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whiskeynwriting ¡ 2 years ago
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Pedro Pascal Characters
Part One | Part Two
The Band Ghost Characters
Call of Duty
Star Wars
Marvel
The Boys
Other Characters
Series Masterlists
Themed Pieces
Kinktober, Daddycember, follower celebrations, reader-specific writing, boyfriend camera roles, character zodiac signs, Mando’a translations.
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scrambledslut ¡ 2 years ago
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FRANCISCO MORALES PLEASE LET ME HAVE YOUR BABIES🗣🗣🗣🗣
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simpingcowboy ¡ 2 years ago
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Quick Wholesome Frankie Morales thought :)
Just a little something about Frankie's daughter doing his nails
I imagine him working blue collar jobs (mechanic, maintenance, ect.) just anything that has him working with his hands alot.
His job leaves him with really rough calloused hands
BUT his nails are often immaculately painted curtsey of his daughter!
I can see him coming home and apologizing to his kid about how he chipped some of the polish off his nails
"I had to strip paint off a car today and well- I guess it worked a little too well."
She doesn't care. It just means she gets to spend time redoing them!
They'd sit down together. Frankie squished down in one of her play chairs
It takes a good 20 minutes for them to settle on a color
Then another 15 to decide on a design. Accent nail? Glitter? Nail stickers?
Not only is Frankie patient with her, he's equally as involved. Besides they're gonna be on his hands all week
Eventually they get started. Frankie's hands are not the most steady, but his daughter is good at holding his hands still
Having large hands isn't always great. Occasionally makes work harder for him, being unable to reach in smaller spaces. But right now? It's definitely to his benefit
His daughter can easily hold his finger in her hand to keep it steady.
His wide nail beds make it easy for her to apply the polish without a mess. And offers much more room for designs
She's always so gentle with him. It warms his heart
She loves doing lotion and oils after doing his nails so everything looks nice and shiny.
"PapĂĄ, your hands are so scratchy! Don't worry I have something for that!"
"Ay gracias mijita, what would I do without you."
The only part Frankie doesn't love is waiting for his nails to dry.
His daughter makes him sit in front of a tiny fan until she's absolutely sure that his nails are dry
But they compromise. He'll be still if she cleans up while they wait
Eventually his nails are dry and he's free to move again
"Do you like them PapĂĄ?" She'll ask excitedly examining her work
"I love them! Thank you" Frankie says, wrapping her in a big hug.
His daughter has him take a couple photos for her. Something to document her progress in nail art
Frankie loves getting his nails done. The time spent with his daughter is priceless
He loves that whenever he's having a hard time, he can look at his hands and remember his reason for being clean. His reason for everything
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px-0 ¡ 9 months ago
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gonna come in here and preemtively let all of you down real quick: as someone who liked Kuma before he was relevant again. i miss when Kuma was a weird cryptic bitch and i dont like how Oda retconned everything he did to make him a soft sweet baby Im Sorry
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wysteria-clad ¡ 2 years ago
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I still can't stop thinking about their age range
So I went through the script to see if I can get any hints and this is what I found
Tom
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Benny
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Will
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It couldn't find about Frankie and Santi though. (But I haven't finished the whole script so might add later if I find anything)
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odetodilfs ¡ 2 years ago
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I don't know what the fuck's been up with me but I've gotten so much inspiration lately and have already done a considerable chunk of a Frankie Morales fanfiction
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moodstabilizr ¡ 4 months ago
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MY FAVORITE FRANKIE FIC FUC
Arizona | On Call
part i
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summary: frankie has a question.
pairing: neighbour!frankie morales x f!reader
ratings/warnings: 18+, MDNI. dual pov. reader and frankie are both bi and have same sex exes. mostly fluff here, folks. and some (maybe a lot of?) angst. just a couple of buds chillin'. some talk of dead/absent parents.
reader is a teacher and has hair, but she is otherwise a blank slate.
wc: 5.1k
an: wow - i really did not expect this little guy to get the response it did yesterday. eternally grateful for your support and enthusiasm. i love you. hope y'all enjoy <3
dividers from the glorious @saradika-graphics
That taste All I ever needed All I ever wanted Too dumb to surrender
- arizona, kings of leon
series masterlist | main masterlist
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It’s quiet in the house. 
Golden, gooey sunlight pools on the living room floor, slanting through the windows. It’s warm against the arm he has resting on the edge of the sofa, not a chirp or a lawnmower whirring outside, and when Frankie closes his eyes, you’re the first thing he sees. 
Evenings like this are the mirror of when your truck first rattled up the street and groaned to a halt outside your front door. He can see it now, within the darkness behind his eyelids, how he’d peeked from behind the curtains in Lucia’s stifling room, her small, sleeping body sprawled on the bed behind him. How the truck door had swung open, how your bare legs had emerged from the cool of the cab, how you’d hopped down onto the pavement and raised a hand to shield your eyes from the low-lying sun. You’d licked your teeth as you’d rechecked the address and looked up at the house - your house. Blown a deep breath out from your cheeks and then turned back to the truck to scrabble around for your keys. 
Frankie had turned from the window as soon as you’d bent across the front seat, only glimpsing the bottom of the plush of your ass peeking from below your sweat shorts before he’d swept the curtain and the image aside.
He’d given it two minutes before he’d clattered out of his front door at the same time as you’d emerged from yours, raising a hand in greeting over the fence that separated your houses. You’d answered with a wide grin and a lilting hey, neighbour as he’d looped the boundary, holding out a palm for you to shake. I'm Frankie, he’d said, shooting a thumb over his shoulder at his open front door. From across the way. You’d given him your name in return, quirking an eyebrow as you asked whether he was feeling strong.
The truth is, that day Frankie would have been whatever you needed him to be. Immediately taken by your warm charm, your glinting smile - the mischief always just behind your eyes, the way you moved through your house. Even now, he cooks you dinner during exam season when you’re up to your eyeballs in papers, mows your lawn when he’s already cutting his own. Offers a shoulder to cry on when you’re missing your dad, always your best friend with spare beers when you’re free on a Saturday night - and you never fail to return the favour. 
The way things are now, it’s like he can’t even remember what it was like to not have you next door. What it was like when he wasn’t launching your paper onto your porch, what it was like when you weren’t soaking him and Lucia with the hose over the fence as they launched water balloons at you from the other side, both your backyards filled with squeals and shouts of laughter. He’s so glad - so infinitely glad - that fate or whatever it was that had a hand in these things dropped you on the curb that evening a year ago. That he had grinned and laughed and said yes ma’am, that he had lept at the chance to be a good neighbour and started lifting the boxes from the truck bed, helped you set up your wifi, invited you in for a beer in his kitchen when you ordered food for the two of you as Lucia slept soundly upstairs. 
He remembers being shocked at how easy it was. Easy conversation, easy laughter, easy silence. Easy friendship.
How he’d looked forward to seeing you across your lawns in the morning, calling out your greetings as you clambered into your truck and he fastened Lucia into her booster in his. The catch ups over the fence when you’d finished your days, recounting stories from the classroom or cockpit, Lucia chipping in her own from nursery. The delight in your eyes when they’d knocked on your door a couple of weekends after you’d moved in, arms laden with a tub of homemade cookies. How you’d invited them in, drinking coffee and juice, how easily you’d gotten on with Lucia. She’d adored you after that first afternoon spent together, falling asleep in your lap as you’d settled in front of the TV in low evening light. You and Frankie had talked long afterwards in lowered voices, you refusing to be relieved of his daughter’s tiny sleeping body, insisting you were just as comfortable as she was. The little girl only stirred when Frankie made you snort with laughter at something one of his friends had said. 
Conversation had turned to friends, family. He told you about his brothers in arms, his mom and dad, Lucia’s mother. A woman who was jetting across the country as a flight attendant, an amicable breakup leading to easy co-parenting. You’d gladly told him about your friends, but hesitated before telling him of how your mom had disappeared from your life when you were little, how your dad had passed away a couple years back. He’d stretched an arm out, one hand settling on and squeezing your knee. Big palms warm and heavy, thick fingers gentle and understanding. When you’d followed the line of his arm up to meet his eyes again, crow's feet folded in their corners. Kindness, understanding. Someone who knew loss, too.
He asked about your dad, what he was like, and you’d regaled him with stories of growing up with ice-cream dates, summers you spent fishing on the local lake, how he’d carry you on his shoulders, his tight throat when he told you how proud he was of you at graduation. 
He’d tentatively asked if your dad had been why you moved out here, understanding the need to put physical distance between yourself and the pain and memory of your surroundings.
No, you’d said, eyes glinting ruefully, this was because of a breakup.
Frankie hadn’t pushed for anymore after that.
You’d invited them over for dinner the weekend after, and Frankie had stood by your side in the kitchen, insisting on helping you cook, immovable despite the rag you whipped at him. As you chopped and fried, you'd told Lucia about stars and blackholes and plants and bugs. She was especially taken by bugs.
You’d dug out books you’d borrowed - and never returned - from the school library for her to pore over, even giving her a magnifying glass to use to hunt for critters in your backyard as you and Frankie had washed up afterwards. The three of you then spent an hour on your hands and knees on the grass as Lucia found worms and beetles and caterpillars, a soft smile on Frankie’s face as you shouldered her never-ending questions with all the grace of a bona-fide teacher. 
Every night that week, Lucia had clamoured to go next door and see the bug lady again.
Frankie had had to explain that you were busy working (yes, even this late, mija), and then had to endure the tiny stomping of feet as Lucia explained to him - with all the levity a four-year-old could muster - that there just weren’t enough bugs in their garden; they had to see the bug lady.
Bug lady. The first nickname they’d christened you with. You’d laughed with a full chest when he told you, and assured him it would be a mantle you’d bear with honour. Bug lady. And then, with time and growing softness, it was shortened to bug, and it stuck. 
Tonight, there is a different question to can we come over and look for bugs? that he needs to ask.
He thinks - knows - you’re the right person for it. Deep in his heart. Can count on one hand the number of people he’d entrust the safety of his daughter with, and all of them are too far away to call.
He needs a babysitter. And so far, he’s gotten nowhere fast with his inquiries.
The numbers he’s tried have been polite enough, more than good at their jobs. But they have clients already, families who came way before him that meant accommodating sitting at relatively short notice would be sporadic at best and impossible at worst.
And he’s running out of time. 
His first late night flight is Thursday; some rich guy taking a date up into the skies to watch the view over the city. It’s good money, and he'd be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy the sights, too. The glimmer of the city below, the ridges of the hills, flash of the ocean in the distance. The worlds and lives of so many people cradled in the bowl of the valley. It’s beautiful, humbling. It’s worth sharing.
You’d enjoy it, he knows. And every night flight reminds him of an evening not too long ago when he’d struck a deal with you, asking you to grab him a beer when you’d gotten up to go to the bathroom mid-movie. You’d wiggled your eyebrows at him, what’s in it for me?
He’d snorted at you, offering various services and items in exchange, all refused, but then before I’ll take you up in the heli if you - had even finished leaving his mouth, you’d leaped up from the sofa, grabbing his hand to shake on it before he could back out. At night. You’d specified, nodding, wide-eyed as though he’d been the one to say it.
He’d rolled his eyes at your eagerness, demanding you make sure it was an extra cold one for that, and you’d bowed in the doorway, smirking. 
‘At your service, my liege,’ you’d said, before scampering out the way of the cushion Frankie launched at you. 
He’d had to ask you to explain to Lucia why she shouldn’t call him my liege two days later, when it seemed she’d lost the meaning of Papi in an effort to be like you. You’d snorted into your soda when he told you, but had fixed Lucia with serious eyes when you told her that Papi was a very special name to call her dad, one that helped him feel loved and appreciated. Lucia had acquiesced quickly afterwards, stretching her arms out to Frankie before he lifted her from her chair, tucking her face into his neck as she apologised profusely, reassuring him that she still loved him the same, just that my liege had sounded so fun coming from your mouth. Frankie had looked over her curls at your bitten lip, your silent laughter, holding his own amusement behind his teeth as he stroked her back and cooed that he knew, mija, it’s okay.
He remembers, with a lurch below his navel, how Lucia had then asked whether you’d call him Papi to show him he was loved, too. How both your jaws had fallen slack, how something had flickered behind your eyes too quickly for him to catch before you’d told her you call him other things to the same effect. Fish, buddy, and then mouthed over the top of her head, asshole. Frankie had laughed, the jumping of his body pushing Lucia into her own giggles, and you’d soon followed.
It’s strange how much like a family you’ve become over the last year, how well you’ve slotted into their lives. One of his best friends, pulling up with the boys when it comes to ranking his favourite people. Filling gaps he didn’t even know were there, healing fissures he thought had closed. How well you fit in his arms, how well your head fits beneath his chin. How well your lips might fit with his, how well you -
A breath of laughter puffs from his nose, and he rolls his eyes at himself. He’s too old to have a crush, too old to be smiling to himself when he thinks of the girl next door, his best pal. Besides, he has a bad track record with dating friends, anyway.
He checks his watch, stills, listening for the sounds of a restless daughter. Satisfied, he pushes himself up from the orange-bathed haven of the couch with a grunt, pulls open the front door, and skips down the porch steps.
The stubble of the lawn is cool beneath his socks as he jogs across the grass, curving around the picket fence between your properties to pop back up on the other side, striding towards your house.
He takes the steps up your porch two at a time, rapping his knuckles against the sage green of your door. He waits no more than five seconds before he knocks again, earning an irritated alriiiiight from the other side.
The click of a lock, and it swings open to reveal you in shorts, a cap, and a worn cotton t-shirt - sun-warmed, soft, gorgeous. 
You grin at the man on your doorstep, and he grins back.
‘Evenin’, teach.’
You click your tongue at the nickname.
‘Way past your bedtime, Morales,’ you tease, ‘You need a warm milk?’
Frankie flicks the back of his hand against the bill of your cap, giggling as it falls to the ground. 
You smooth your hair, scrabbling for the hat, scowling at him.
‘Need a warm milk,’ he mocks, and you land a carefully curled fist against his bicep as you stand, deadening his arm. ‘Ow, pendeja,’ he pouts, rubbing at it. ‘You know, wearing a cap indoors still doesn’t make you cool.’
That pretty, playful little scowl flickers over your face again.
‘I just finished my study break, actually.’
‘Oh yeah? What are we studying today? A million ways teenagers make your life hard?’
The scowl is stolen by a bitten back smile, and you wave him off, turning on your heel down the hallway, tugging your cap back on.
‘Whaddya want? Pain in my ass,’ you call, walking away from him and back into your kitchen. He follows, drumming his fingers along your sideboard as he goes.
‘I need a favour, if you have any spare.’
Your kitchen is bathed in the same warm glow as his living room, but instead of quiet, there’s the slow turn and hum of your laundry machine in the closet, the sweet croon of a voice from the record player in the corner. Fruit in a bowl, bottles of gifted wine, pictures of friends, paintings from students. The jungle of houseplants you keep towards the patio doors, the jumble of papers, books, planners, and pens spread around your laptop on the table.
It’s so you. So like home.
You pick up the stem of your wine glass, half full, between your thumb and pointer finger, eyes turned up to the ceiling as you count on your other hand. You wince and suck your teeth, eyes falling back to his.
‘I dunno. ’S not looking good, Fish,’ you say somberly, ‘My favour quota’s already been exceeded this year.’
‘Baby, it’s March.’ 
You shrug.
‘Been busy.’
He raises an eyebrow at you, and you scoff.
‘Well, I guess I could make an exception for you, big guy.’
He smiles, leaning against the kitchen counter.
‘I need a babysitter.’
You nod, swallowing a mouthful of wine before placing the glass back on its coaster. Papers shift and whisper as you hunt for your phone, buried in the piles of essays.
‘Oh. Sure. I have some numbers -’
‘Actually - I was thinking -’
‘Now that’s dangerous for all of us.’
He points a finger at you, and you bite your lip, humour lighting your eyes.
‘Ha. Anyway. I was thinking - I know… I know you got that big car bill last month. And I know you don’t get paid enough. And you know Lucia loves you…’
You frown at him.
‘You want me to babysit?’
He bites his lip, looking over your table with clearer eyes. You’re busy. Always busy. Overworked and stressed. A heat crawls up his neck, early onset guilt.
Maybe this was a bad idea. He inhales deeply.
‘Yeah. But I’m starting to realise that might be a lot to ask.’
Hm.
He watches as you pull out a chair and sit at the table, studying him.
‘If it makes it any better, you’re my last resort.’
He’s relieved to hear a flutter of a giggle in response, and you clap your hand over your heart.
‘Ouch. There I was, thinking I meant more to you guys than that.’
He crosses his arms, shaking his head, smiling.
‘You know you do, bug.’
You take your cap off, throwing it away from you on the table, rubbing at your forehead.
‘I’ve got a lot of work to do, Frankie,’ you say softly, eyes gentle.
He sighs.
‘I know. You can say no. It’s just - all the numbers I’ve called are kind of booked up, that’s all. And I guess - I wanna leave her with someone I trust. Someone I know. At first, anyway.’
You stare at him still, thinking.
‘What are we talking?’
‘Once or twice a week. Three at the very most. Just for late night flights.’ He pauses. ‘I’ll pay you top dollar.’
You make a disapproving noise.
‘You don’t have to pay me, Frankie.’
‘Of course I do, don’t be ridiculous. It’s on your time. And if it helps you out…’ 
You frown at him, but he fixes you with a look. No negotiating. You turn your gaze out to your backyard. 
He watches, nervous, as you chew your thumb.
Your eyes find his again.
‘Can I take work over? To do round yours?’
‘Absolutely.’
‘Do I have to cook?’
‘No. I’ll make sure there’s food. For both of you.’
You nod slowly.
‘And Luc is in bed by…?’
‘Six.’
You nod again.
‘I’m not expecting the whole nine yards,’ he says, shifting. ‘No cookies or playdough, nothing like that. Just someone to look after her. And I’ll still be making calls.’
‘When would you need me?’
Frankie’s mouth twitches. 
‘Thursday this week. Tuesday and Friday next week.’
You take another drink of your wine. 
‘Can I sleep on it?’
‘Of course, bug.’ He smiles. You return it.
‘Then I’ll sleep on it. I’ll see what the schedule’s like and let you know tomorrow.’
His smile widens.
‘Alright. Thank you. Really.’
You stand from your chair, holding up a palm.
‘I ain’t said yes yet, Morales.’
The smile turns goofy.
‘Yes, ma’am.’
He steps away from the counter and pulls you into his arms. Holds you there for a minute, rocking, enjoying the warmth, the closeness, your smell. Reminds himself that it’s weird to think about your scent as much as he does.
You untangle yourself from him, hands on his biceps where you give a little squeeze.
‘Alright,’ you say, ‘Off you go. See if the kid hasn’t burned the house down yet.’
He chuckles as he retreats, backing down your hallway to the open front door.
‘See you tomorrow, teach.’
‘Get lost, Francisco.’
You sign off by flipping each other the bird as he pulls the door shut behind him, just as you usually do.
And as he steps back into his still-quiet house, he tries to tamp down his grin and his fluttering heart, just as he usually does.
You text him two hours later, when he’s fresh from the shower, clad in only his boxers.
Alright, I slept on it. I’ll be round Thursday.
Along with the swell of relief in his chest, this time the grin and the flutter are much harder to smother.
The night before you left for college, you’d had a nightmare.
You weren’t the type to scare easily; eighteen years old and free from any of the real worries the world could bring. And you were so fucking excited for this next adventure, so ready to begin the rest of your life. Still, you’d found yourself doing something you hadn't done since you were a child.
You’d knocked first - softly, so softly. Waited for a come in that never came. Your dad had stirred anyway as you closed the door quietly behind you, turning, half asleep, to see you stood twisting your fingers in the middle of the carpet.
‘Y’alright, sweetheart?’ he’d asked, all gravelly and tender, threatening tears to spill over your lashline.
‘Yeah,’ you’d mumbled, ‘Just had a nightmare.’
He’d simply lifted the covers on the other side of the bed, and you’d slipped into their warmth, scooching into his side, breathing in his smell. He’d cradled you in his arms like you were still a kid - afraid, vulnerable - and you’d let him. Let the tears soak into his shirt. Felt his grip tighten on you, the kiss he pressed to the top of your head. The promise within it, within the cool moonlight bleeding through the curtains. 
If you don’t wanna do it, all you gotta do is say.
He’d known you didn’t need to hear it, knew it was all you’d worked for, dreamed of. So instead, he’d murmured something else.
‘I’m so proud of you.’
You’d nodded into his chest, and he’d waited until the tears stopped falling before he asked if you wanted to talk about it. You hadn’t at first. But he’d always promised that talking about a dream broke it.
‘I dreamt you weren’t here.’
The vision had hung in the room for a moment, lapping against your dad’s quiet breathing.
‘I am. I’m right here, sweetheart.’
You’d nodded again, that deep, swooping panic of being completely alone in the world threatening to claw through your chest and sweep away his comfort. You couldn’t say anything else. Nothing about the empty house you’d seen, the dust sheets covering lonely chairs.
‘Always gonna be here. Can’t get rid of me.’
You’d both known he was wrong. That one day, this night would be a memory. That one day, you’d try to remember what it felt like to be held like this, known like this, try to remember the scent of his sleepshirt, and not be able to. But that would be years - decades - away. Tomorrow you start the beginning of your real, grownup life. Tomorrow, he’ll drive you across the state. He’ll haul your boxes up to your dorm room, and he’ll sit on your bed and look around and smile at you. The smile will be small, full of love, pride, grief. The grief of letting his little girl go, of looking at you and seeing you at all ages at once. Newborn, tiny in his big hands. On his shoulders, laughing at the sky. Nervous on your first day at school. Shy at the gate of highschool. Flying through the years, surrounded by friends, now landing here. 
And when he stands to leave, to tear himself away, the tears will fall again. You’ll say you’re not sure, your whole world rocking, tilting. And he’ll tell you that you might not be, but he is. You’re gonna be great. You’ll be amazing. And his most favourite line of all.
A ship in a harbour is safe. But that’s not what ships were built for.
And you’ll laugh, and you’ll hug him, and you’ll wish you could for a little longer. But you’ll walk him downstairs all the same, out to his car. You’ll shield your eyes and wave until his license plate disappears, and then you’ll cry in the sun until you have a headache. By the time you’re out with your roommate that evening, you’ll feel better. 
You won’t think about whether he cried on the way home, whether his body shook with sobs. Whether he’s sat in front of the TV now, unable to focus on the movie that’s playing because the house is too damn quiet. Won’t think about how, when he tries to sleep, he can still feel that little girl curled up into his side. How he contemplates his own mortality, hopes it won’t come for him for decades, hopes he’ll see you graduate, meet someone, be happy, achieve all you want to.
For now, there is only the blue moonlight, the deep breathing, the warm arms.
And four years later, your nightmare will come true.
You’re awake, though barely. Faintly aware of the wet on your cheeks, of the ache deep in your chest. The memory, the dream. You try to burrow your face into him, try to breathe in his scent, recall the way he talks. And as the same moonlight from the dream floods your vision, you remember. 
Four years later, and the hurt is still as raw. 
You curl into yourself, folding your arms around your body, holding it in, holding it together. Breathe through it - in through the nose, out through the mouth. I love you. I love you. Your voice and your father’s blending together. You try not to let it overwhelm you. Try not to recall all the moments, all the last moments. The hospitals, the treatments, how he wasted away before you, how you could do nothing about it. But it’s hard. So hard, alone, in the middle of the night like this.
When the burn in your throat eases, you reach for your phone. 3:32am. You unlock it out of habit, texts still open. The conversation you’d had with Frankie earlier - times, dates, what he’d make you for dinner. 
You wish they could have met each other. 
You’re sure Frankie would have loved him. Would have loved his laugh, would have shot the shit about baseball, would have clapped him on the back and joined him for beers on the porch like he does with you. And you’re sure your dad would have loved Frankie. Would have seen his kindness, his patience, his humour. A good man, just like he was.
Sometimes, when the younger man leaves your kitchen, your dad appears, sat at the table across from you. 
‘You like him.’ He says. 
‘Come off it, dad,’ like you don’t both know you’re lying. He gives that knowing little shrug. 
‘Whatever, kid,’ he says, ‘I see the way you look at him. Like you looked at - who was it - Jordan, in seventh grade?’ You always throw something at him then. A marker, a highlighter. And he always laughs at you.
You click your phone screen off, bathed in half-darkness once again. Stare at the frozen ceiling fan, the divots and shadows on the ceiling. Tired, but too awake to sleep. 
You grumble as you swing your legs out from the covers, standing from the bed. Pad downstairs in the dark, flick on the kitchen light, fill the kettle and set it to boil. Through the window, across the way, Frankie’s kitchen light is also on. Your brow furrows - this isn’t a time either of you should be awake - but then he appears in the window, shirtless, busying himself with something by the sink, and you quickly avert your eyes. Something you’ve gotten good at doing since you moved here.
Good at desperately trying not to notice his soft curls, the way his biceps stretch his t-shirts, the way his shoulders fill doorways, the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles at you. The way he says your name, the golden skin you’ve glimpsed, the noises he might make -
You roll your eyes at yourself. Crashing out of an engagement, skipping town and developing a crush on the DILF next door is so… you. 
Annie would have gotten a kick out of it, that’s for sure.
The kettle finishes its boil, and you reach for a mug, a tea bag. Watch the tendrils of steam curl from the clutch of the ceramic as you brace your hands on the marble either side of it. You chew the inside of your cheek, head hanging between your shoulders, startling when your phone buzzes, furious-sounding as it crawls across the countertop. 
You know who it is before you see the caller ID. 
‘Hey, neighbour.’
‘Hey, bug.’
You smile into the receiver, holding the mobile to your ear as you move to the sink, adding cold water to the tea. You look up through the window to find Frankie also stood before his, looking back at you. Mercifully, he’s found a shirt, but his bed head still has your stomach turning in cartwheels. 
‘What’s up?’
‘Saw your light on. Wanted to check you’re okay.’
You hold up your mug, cheersing him through the glass. 
‘I’m good. Just having a little drink.’
You watch as he cocks his hip against the counter. 
‘Yeah? What kinda drink you got?’
You exhale through your nose, rolling your eyes. 
‘Chamomile.’
There’s a beat, and then his voice is soft, tender.
‘Y’had a nightmare, too?’
You shake your head.
‘Not a nightmare, just a dream.’
‘Dad?’
You nod, sipping.
‘Yeah. You know how it is. Lucia okay?’
You watch him flick his gaze to the hallway, the stairs beyond your line of sight. Hear the scratch of his whiskers as he rubs at his beard.
‘She’s alright. Nothing a warm milk and her night light can’t fix.’
You smile at him.
‘You remind me of him, you know.’
Frankie pauses his scratching, peering out at you, surprised.
‘You’re a good dad. The best. He was, too.’
Your voice is low, affectionate. Something pulls deep in his gut, something that forces a tight bubble up his throat. He swallows a couple of times, closing his eyes to the kindness.
‘Thank you, bug.’
‘I mean it.’
He nods, voice crackly and deep when it comes to you.
‘I know.’
You watch each other a moment longer, separate rooms, separate houses, such closeness bridging those gaps. Frankie breaks the quiet.
‘You sure you’re okay?’
You smile, nod, sip.
‘I’m sure. Should head back to bed, anyway.’
Frankie hums down the line, thoughtful. A breath whistles through his nose.
‘G’night, bug.’
‘Good night, Fish.’
You wait for the beep of the disconnected line, Frankie’s wave through the window. The hard lump in your throat as you watch him retreat to the doorway of his kitchen, the darkness that stares back at you, the ache of being alone again on this moon of grief. 
And something quieter, more selfish. Creeping and tidal that laps at the edges, a want for a man you have convinced yourself you cannot have. A sadness that buzzes deep in your skin, curls back layers of your being, tells you that you cannot afford to be broken again. Not like your dad. Not like Annie. 
But you like him, your dad says. What’s so wrong with that?
You cocoon yourself tightly in your duvet, your back to the moonlight, the reminders. Tired eyes blinking at the door. Waiting. Waiting, in a different life, different house, different state, for eighteen year old you to tiptoe in and tell you about her nightmare. 
Waiting for you to tell her that her dad is right there.
That she should hold him a little longer before he drives home tomorrow. 
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