#buy heartburn no more

[galacticarcade]

Just found out chewing gum can help with heartburn (something we have been having major issues with for awhile now.) And on one hand thank the stars that worked but also what the fuck what the fuck this whole fucking time??? I didn't need to be chomping on tums like my life fucking depended on it??

[contentloadingandstuff]

Gym Headcanons - Lisa & Ningguang x Male!Reader

A/N: I hope you'll like this one! All the others WIPs are staring daggers at me though... CW: Nothing notable.

Going to a gym? Lisa will pass, thank you. 

All the sweat and all the effort could, if she had to exert herself at all, go towards other things than gaining muscles. What would she use them for anyway? Her strength doesn't come from raw, brutish power, but rather from her brilliance and knowledge. 

For Lisa, getting some gains would be a bad thing as far as her appearance is concerned. She feels great as she is - of healthy weight with some delectable fluff on her belly, thighs and butt. A girl's got to have some meat on her bones, doesn't she? It's perfect for touching and resting your weary head on those plushy thighs. She won't ruin that especially since you're far from complaining about her assets. 

Even if she won't train, Lisa will care for her diet, and will keep an eye on yours too if you ask her to. She'll buy more of her natural yogurts, fruits, granola and other healthy foodstuffs. You'll be in good hands - Lisa will buy you shakes and foods with lots of protein to help build that dazzling body of yours. 

If at any point you find yourself tempted to cheat, she’ll gently remind you of your goal and help you resist. 

She's a vegetarian herself, but will not, to any extent of the word, force her views upon you. She just dislikes the taste of meat, especially when it's fried. The heartburn she feels after is straight up awful. Still, she won't object to making you hearty meals with all the love she has. After all, she has all the time in the world. 

Although she wouldn't ever come to the gym herself, it's different with you there. Lisa will gladly tag along to keep you company whenever she can. She won't hesitate to do her research, helping you in maintaining the proper position and form as you train. Need a break? She'll pass you the water and take away the weights (according to her ability). Feeling tired or bored? Lisa will be there, keeping a conversation or reading out loud to you - this way you train both your mind and your body. She'll get you whatever help she can offer. 

Is she accompanying you to gawk at your bare chest, your tensing, sweaty muscles, hear your masculine groans of exertion as you lift inhuman weights and give it your all? See you doing what men do, pushing yourself to the limit to become bigger, better, faster and stronger? Perhaps. Is that an invalid reason? Not at all. 

After a certain amount of these trips, the mage will start eyeing the exercise mats with increasing curiosity. Of course she wouldn't do any actually tiring exercises, but it wouldn't hurt to stretch a little, would it? Being flexible has a few uses Lisa can't think of, most of which involve you~

The first few times would render her limbs and joints crying in pain as years of “rust” come off. It would surely leave her grumpy the next day, but it's alright - you'll do your duty and massage her pains away, won’t you? 

When going at them, Lisa likes to do stretches that let her poor back get some lovely relief. Every time she begins the cobra stretches of the day, she can't help but sigh in satisfaction. The first one's the best, no doubt about that. On the other hand, those exercises that require her to lean down are the cause of her pains rather than the relief. Toe touches aren't easy, and things like forward folds are the stuff of nightmares, the mere thought of which is enough to make her spine ache.

Ningguang isn't one to work out either. She’s on a strict diet, planned out for her by the best dietitian and cooked by the best chef Mora can buy. Each of her meals has its calories counted to the letter, and - should the situation demand it - Ningguang is capable of counting them herself. Even when there's no label, she's able to judge it with impressive accuracy. 

It's thanks to this attentive lifestyle that she can flaunt her wasp waist. Even if a person's worth is more in merit than appearance, impeccable beauty can go a long way too. Oftentimes just her looks alone can charm an interlocutor, leading to favorable outcomes. 

Eating this little has a downside, coming in the form of low energy levels. She can push pencils all day long, but even short jogs can find her out of breath after a while. Ningguang gets tired and sore fairly easily, making it no surprise that she avoids straining herself. 

She avoids training, but that doesn't mean she simply sits around looking pretty. Each of her mansions is equipped with a rich and well stocked gym for use at yours and hers leisure. Before you came they were mostly gathering dust, but your interest in training reminded her of that purchase. It was nice to see they finally had a use. 

Sometimes, on a slow day, Ningguang will bring out her sport gear and join you in the training room. Most of her time she'll do stretches or use the treadmill, since these don't increase muscle mass that much - the high class canon of beauty doesn't include muscle girls, nor does she see the appeal if truth is told. She's the Tianquan, not some… sea captain. 

Besides, that would be threading on your territory. Why be muscular if you're the muscle man here? If you're strong, then she'll be swift and agile. Perfectly complementary, wouldn't you say? 

When it comes to date ideas, a gym date is a unique one to be sure, but she doesn't mind. It gives both of you a chance to show off your hard earned physiques and spend some quality time together. Ningguang enjoys you spotting for her, even if she won't do the exercises by herself. The attention is always appreciated. 

She wouldn't admit that to anyone, but she enjoys goofing around with you. Using her as a dumbbell or doing push-ups with her casually sitting on your back is both amusing and quite flustering - getting a first hand experience of your strength never fails to get her a little red. But don't tell anyone, or else…!

Sometimes when she needs to think, Ningguang visits you and simply enjoys your presence in silence. There's something hypnotic about you going about your business and the repetitive motions of the equipment. Many times she watched you in silence, only to mutter a silent ‘got it’ before getting up and thanking you with a kiss. Each time after she left the room you were left fairly confused. Confused, but happy to be of help nonetheless.

Thanks for reading!

[purelyfiction]

stars in a line - robert 'bob' floyd x f!reader

Word Count: 1,207 words

Summary: Chicken's in the skillet, ice in the drink, head's in the clouds, diamond's in the rough, he's in a Chevy and I'm in love // Tips in the apron, hair's in a braid, Mercury's all in retrograde // He's in a T-shirt all cleaned up, Good lord almighty, mama don't wait up // Chills down my spine, hearts on the line, He's all mine and I'm in love

Content Warning: fluff!! also note of animal abandonment

Author Note: another round for @ohtobeleah 's galentines writings :))))))

the familiar rumble of the older engine makes your features split with a smile. when bob had told you he was gonna drive his truck from montana to california you thought he was losing his mind.

then he'd explained why he was so insistent.

that he'd taken you out in that '87 Chevy all those years ago. after weeks of coming into the diner you worked in after school, dozens and dozens of milkshake and fry basket combos (and subsequent heartburn) just so he could hang out with you. he'd gotten up the nerve to finally ask you out. that truck had been your front row seats at the drive in watching a rerun of some old army movie his dad had recommended.

he'd taken the two of you to prom in that truck. to high school graduation, your college graduation. when the engine died on you while he was stationed in atlanta he'd taught you how to fix the thing via facetime.

beverly the chevy had been there for so many of your big moments. she'd been the reason why bob ended up buying the house that you stood contently in.

'bev is gonna need a place out of the elements if she's gonna stay top notch.'

this house had been the only one with a two car garage. one side for bev and one side for your car.

now when the engine rumbles echoed in the garage and made the older house vibrate, you couldn't help but grin. the sizzling of chicken in a skillet on the stove greets bob when he steps into the kitchen. he's greeted with the smell and a bottle of wine in a pile of ice in the sink. the door to the garage shuts, and you glance over your shoulder. when you do, you're witnessing the brown paper bouquet in his hands, white t-shirt on his shoulders, levis hugging his waist, trucker cap right where it belongs. he knows what this does to you. it's a simple look, nothing more than the basics but that's what does it. it highlights him. the man you love, bare bones and all.

the same man you fell for in that truck bed all those years ago.

he slides his boots off and wraps his arms around you from behind you, showing off the flowers he carried in. "happy flowers to you," he's humming now, making you giggle as his arms tight around you start bouncing you back and forth as he sings to the tune of 'happy birthday', "happy flowers to you, happy flowers, happy flowers, to my valentine youuuuuu" he punctuates the end of the song with a sloppy kiss to your cheek as you ease the weight of the florals from his hand.

"these are stunning, bo." you grin as he lets go, letting you turn to face him fully as he smiles.

"i know, i picked 'em cause they remind me of you." bob grins before pressing a quick kiss to your lips, barely pulling back when he speaks again, "happy valentines, sweet girl." you repeat the sentiment before he takes the arrangement and starts to get them into water.

you can't help but stare as he begins trimming the ends of each stem, easing them into the vase. you can smell the freshness of his body wash, having showered on base before he came home to you. couldn't waste time on your night together - and he knew it. the combination on him is near lethal to you. if you weren't actively cooking dinner, the counter would have been supplying a different kind of heat to the kitchen.

"i bought you something!" you nearly startle him with your sudden announcement, the reminder of your gift hitting you as you watch him. running down the hall causes the pup in the living room to chase after you, causing you and bob to both laugh.

shadow had been an unplanned addition to your lives because the poor pup appeared on your back deck one night. the collar on his neck held your current address. the previous owners had barely been involved with the process of the sale, so you didn't have their contact information to tell them hey assholes, you left your dog.

so, you and bob joked that the house came with a guardian, a black lab and german shepherd mix (bob got his dna tested out of infuriating curiosity). he quickly clung to the two of you - thus 'shadow'.

you lug the box into the kitchen, where bob has kept an eye on the meal you had recklessly abandoned. looking at you he huffs a gasp. "sweet girl, this is unnecessary." he laughs, taking the wrapped gift from your arms and sliding it onto the counter. still, he tears into it and reveals the milkshake maker, making him laugh, looking over at you with a grin. "that why you got your hair all done like this?" he grins, his fingers moving over the braid you'd plaited this morning.

"maybe." you hum, kissing his cheek as he looks over the box holding the machine. that diner the two of you met in had closed not long after you moved to san diego. you'd spent hours there and he'd once complimented the ribbon in your hair when it was woven into the braid on your head. recently, bob had mentioned how he'd missed those milkshakes they'd always made him.

he grins, before tucking his hand into his pocket. "hold out your hand." you hold it out as he asks, palm up. what he sets into your palm catches you off guard.

you'd been expecting something small, likely a jewelry box or something, like the years before.

instead a little metal circle is dropped into your palm. shining and glimmering. diamonds along it like stars in a line. your spine is electrified with chills, as your jaw drops as you look at him in awe. "bob, what-you-"

"i can get on my knee if you want, i'm just- i'm so in love with you. i'm truly in awe of you and how valid you make me feel. how valued and cherished i feel - how you listen," his head nods to the machine on the counter, "and you care and you never fail to be the best. just simply the best. i hope that i am for you-"

cutting him off you speak, "and you are," he laughs.

"then i wanna continue being that for you. for forever." you're sliding the new piece of jewelry onto your ring finger before he can get the words out, your arms slinking around his shoulders and linking your lips with his.

when you pull back, you grin.

"you're mine. i'm all yours and i'm in love. i'm so in love with you. with our life and the path we're on." you whisper. his hand takes a hold of your arm before the two of you jump at the sound of a smoke detector, both of you scrambling to clear the kitchen of smoke.

when the alarm is off and the burnt chicken is tossed, you smirk as you pull ice cream from the fridge.

"ice cream for dinner?" you try. bob grins.

"how about milkshakes instead?"

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

The Arcana HCs: How the M6 like to fluster you

The very late sequel to this post:

How MC likes to fluster the M6

Julian

When I tell you this man is SHAMELESS

Does he fluster easily? Yes. However, being horny on main is his default mode. His own flusteredness will not stop him

Grand, romantic displays of affection. He will write an entire play to perform in the community theatre just to proclaim his love for you from on stage

Any chance to sing a romantic duet, he's pulling you with him. It doesn't matter if it's in public. It doesn't matter if you have the singing voice of an angry hippopotamus

Oh no, he bit his tongue while the two of you were snacking at the food stalls in the market place! Kiss it better?

Oh no, he's getting heartburn from all the street food! Here, help him open his shirt so you can check his chest

Physically incapable of passing a flower seller without buying you one

And then presenting it with the most dramatic flourish and flowery speech he can come up with in the moment

So many suggestive nicknames. So. Many.

Asra

What a tease this sly magician is

They've memorized every single one of your weaknesses, and they love to exploit them

Sensitive scalp? He'll chat with a friend, arm around your shoulders as his trimmed nails drag their way up the back of your head

Holding your hand becomes feather light touches of their fingertips swirling around your palm and inner wrist

He's leaning in to whisper something in your ear, and oh! There's a gentle kiss being pressed to the pulse point below it just before he turns back to what he was doing

Locking their ankles with yours under the table when you're seated across from them

Sneaky compliments. The kind that you wouldn't pick up on if you didn't know that teasing, lazily cat-like face he makes so well

Speaking of facial expressions - they will fix you with the most dreamy, adoring, seductive face for minutes on end. In any and every situation

Regularly uses your bond to let you know exactly how you make him feel

Nadia

Oh, she loooves to see you blush

Very forward in her advances. If she sees you talking to someone, she'll take your hand and press kisses to each fingertip until your breath hitches

Which will make you pause in conversation, which is her opening to steal your attention

Loves feeding you. At dinner parties, offering you a forkful from her plate or sip from her glass and savoring the indirect kiss

In more casual settings, holding pieces of fruit and cheese against your lips so she can brush her knuckles across them

Constantly helping you fix your clothes, jewelry, or hair as an excuse to touch you

Heaping you with detailed and genuine praise in every setting. She can go on and on about your strengths for hours

Will happily trace your facial features with her fingertips while you talk to her

"What am I doing? Oh nothing, just admiring the realms' most exquisite work of living art."

She adores you. And as previously stated, she adores your blush

Muriel

It took a while for him to think of trying, to be honest. Usually you're the one flustering him by simply showing affection

That is, until he caught sight of you blushing as he changed his shirt one evening and thought it wasn't a bad look on you

He didn't like his body before, but if showing a little skin and muscle is all it takes to make you flush, it's an easy sacrifice

Would NEVER attempt any of the following tactics in public, for the woods only:

Removing his shirt for dirty tasks, such as wood chopping, boulder lifting, and (on one occasion) uprooting a small infected tree stump with his bare hands

Carrying you like you weigh nothing whenever you say you're tired

If you're cold, very shyly pulling you into his lap and wrapping you up in his arms and cloak

You liked that flower? He's planting a row of them outside the window

He loves you so much, he will even hold your hand in public if it makes you smile

Portia

Most of the time she flusters you it's not on purpose. She won't realize until you're already blushing and fumbling

Which, let's be clear, she does appreciate

Portia is a force of nature who puts everything she is into loving and supporting and adoring her partner

She will defend your honor and proclaim all your accomplishments with 0 hesitation

She also loves to read. She likes reading mysteries, but you'll also find that she likes reading spicier stories as well

She likes bringing said stories home and reading them out loud to you

She likes using them as inspiration for when she's on a trip without you and wants to send you a particularly raunchy love letter

She likes convincing you to reenact said stories and love letters with her

And she REALLY likes making subtle references to them in conversation at a friend's house, just to watch the heat travel up your face to your ears

You're her favorite character to dream about

Lucio

He likes making you blush. It's a fantastic ego boost and it suits you

But planning ahead isn't his strong suit. If he manages to fluster you, it's because he saw an opportunity, and he seized it

So. Many. Dirty. Jokes.

At first it might feel like it's in poor taste. It's not the most romantic way to woo someone

However, there is a reason he threw the best parties. When it comes to fun, exciting, and pleasurable things, he is creative

You are going to hear innuendos that should not make as much sense as they do

You are going to hear references and suggestions that will make you stop and wonder, "how would that even work?"

And figuring out the answers to that question will make you flush every time

It doesn't help that he's a generally handsy person. He will take advantage of any and every excuse for physical contact in public

Will make an inappropriate noise every time you skewer something to grill it over the campfire. It's his signature joke

[tiedupinknottss]

tips tips tips

1. Drink one glass of water every hour. It will make you feel full.

2. Drink ice cold water. Your body will burn calories just getting the water to a normal temperature to digest. Also it is great for your complexion.

3. Drink 3 cups of green tea daily. It will help boost your metabolism, plus its antioxidants make your skin look great.

4. Take vitamins daily. Do not take vitamins on an empty stomach, otherwise they have nothing to catalyze with.

5. Eat ice or gum when hungry. This will make your body think it had food without the calories.

6. Do aerobics until you want to faint.

7. Eat spicy foods. They raise your metabolism.

8. Take cold showers because your body will burn calories to heat you back up.

9. DON’T take laxatives. They don’t help you to lose weight.

10. DON’T use diuretics. They only dehydrate you.

11. Brush your teeth constantly so you won’t be tempted to eat afterwards.

12. Wear a rubberband around your wrist. Snap it when you want to eat.

13. Clean something gross (toilet, litter box, boyfriend’s closet) when you want to eat. You will not want to eat after cleaning a litter box.

14. Keep your hair in good condition so no one will suspect anything.

15. Get a job so you’ll have to work through meal times.

16. Exercise twice the amount of calories eaten.

17. Use smaller plates and utensils so it seems like you ate more.

18. Chew eat bite of food thoroughly and then take a sip of water between bites. You will feel full quicker and will not eat as much.

19. Say you are going to eat at a friend’s house and instead go for a walk. You will be burning calories instead of taking them in.

20. Buy clothes that you can’t fit into and hang them wear you can see them. This will motivate you to lose weight to fit into them.

21. Sleep at least six hours a day. If you get less than six this can lower your metabolism by 15%.

22. If you start to feel hungry do situps or punch yourself in the stomach. You will not feel hungry anymore.

23. Pamper yourself! Give yourself a facial, paint your nails, anything to make you feel pretty.

24. Make yourself a snack, but instead of eating it throw it away. Leave the dirty dishes whereyour parents can find them. They will think you ate.

25. Prepare a list of excuses as to why you can’t eat – You’re sick, you’re a vegetarian, allergic, etc. You’d be amazed at how many good excuses there are.

26. Get out of your house! If you’re not sitting around then people can’t start shit with you about not eating.

27. Join a pro-ana group or start your own website. Anything that will keep you motivated.

28. Make an ANA scrapbook with pics of skinny models. Right down all the reasons you want to lose weight. Keep track of everything you eat. Look at it daily for thinsperation.

29. Keep good posture, burns 10% more calories when you sit up straight.

30. Instead of food, buy something else, a new shirt, flowers, jewelrey etc.

31. Make a list of all the “bad” foods that you crave and tend to binge on. Each day, pick one to take out of your diet that you absolutely, no matter what, cannot eat again. Take one off the list each day until there are no more bad foods you can have.

32. Avoid alcohol! A shot of liquor has 100-120 calories, a glass of wine has 80 calories, a lite beer has 110-120 calories, and a regular beer has 140-170 calories.

33. Never eat anything bigger than about a cup, your stomach will expand and then you’ll get hungry more.

34. Eat in front of a mirror naked. See how much you can eat then!

35. The smell of coffee is suppose to supress appetite.

36. Wear perfectly applied lip gloss. It makes you more aware of what’s going in your mouth. Also, flavored ones help with cravings.

37. Have 6 small meals a day. Take 2 apples, and split them so you can make 6 meals out of them. That way your body will be tricked into thinking it’s eating more.

38. Low calorie hot chocolate curbs chocolate cravings, and makes you feel full.

39. Take anti-heartburn pills if you’re really hungry. They nuetralize the acid that builds and makes you hungry.

40. Take a picture of yourself wearing a bathing suit or something equally revealing, look at it when you want to eat.

41. It takes 20 minutes for the brain to realize the stomach is full.

42. When you get hunger pains curl into a ball, it makes them go away.

43. If you’re a smoker and hungry, light up a cigarette. It curbs your appetite.

44. Eat lots of fiber. It makes you feel full and takes fat with it out of your body. The natural cleansing helps improve both your energy level and overall feeling of wellness.

45. Before you dig into that cake, bag of chips, candy, or whatever, take a deep breath and count to 100. Usually by the time you get to 100 you will have convinced yourself that you don’t really want it.

46. When you’re hungry chug 2 glasses (or how many you need) of straight water. It’ll make you so full and nauseous you will have completely lost your appetite.

47. Celery actually burns calories. Every hour eat a stalk of it. Not only will it fill you up, but it will also get your metabolism kickin’.

48. Weigh yourslef before and after every time you eat. Not only will it eliminate unnecessary eating, but it will make you want to eat less when you see the numbers creep up.

49. Read the nutritional information. Remember, fat-free does not mean calorie-free. Also keep an eye on fiber content. Get as much fiber into your diet as you can, while cutting fat and calories.

50. Don’t eat a lot at once. Spread your food throughout the day. This will help to avoid binging and keep your metabolism going.

51. If you like to drink alcohol, you’ll like this. Make a rule: You can only drink every time you lose 2lbs. So, if you lose 4lbs a week, you can drink Friday and Saturday night. However, if you only lose 2lbs a week, you only get to drink one night.

52. Do not eat in front of the computer or TV. This distracts you from recognizing you’re full.

53. Save the money you would have spent on that meal in a jar. Save it in a bottle instead and watch it grow.

54. Stay away from Slim-fast and other so-called “healthy” candy bars and shakes… one look at the nutition facts will tell you why. With all the carbs and excess calories you may as well go eat a freakin pie or something. Not to mention the rediculous prices… save yourself the money, and the calories.

55. Instead of buying food, buy yourself flowers. Food is depressing, but flowers make you happy.

56. When having cravings drink a couple glasses of water with slices of lemons and count to 100 and it should go away.

57. Eating 100 cals 4 times a day is better than eating a 400 cal meal.

58. An occasional binge doesn’t hurt, in fact it’s quite beneficial if you have reached a plateau (stopped losing weight). Your body will think you have stopped starving yourself, and you will drop at least a pound overnight! Just don’t binge too regularly!

59. Someone told me that if you take a pure cold bath for 15-30 min and lower your body temp, your body burns around 200 cals for every degree it has to raise itself to reach a normal body temperture. This person tried it, a 30 min bath lowered their temp about 3-4 degrees

[lackadaisy-headcanon-supply-unit]

Pardon me, I just stumbled across this classy little joint, and I'm feeling a little adventurous. I'd like to order a Oneshot On The Rocks, Nico Savoy flavor.

(Gender neutral, fluff. Nico gets into one of his romantic flings with a fellow coworker he's done a few jobs with, but he realizes he likes them too much to let them go.)

I know you have other patrons here, so take your time. I'll be here all night.

Nicodeme Savoy had always been cold.

It had started right from a young age: in the cold stone halls of the convent orphanage; in the stiff wind during the first night he spent on the road with his sister Serafine; in the mud of the marshes they trudged through, only to just get away and be together.

The cold continued through the years, in the cold shoulders people would give him when he asked question—no one wanted to talk to two run away orphans and get in trouble with the cops. It was cold like all the dinners they had to have. It was cold like the glares people would give when they tried to buy something with the little money they tried to scrape together, because they assumed they'd steal anyway. By refusing to let them be honest, they ended up committing more crimes by the age of eighteen than most. It was cold like the slithering bodies of snakes that crawled over them while they slept, like the alligators' thick skin when they found a carcass or came too close to a sleeping one. Everything was cold: the nights, the days, and eventually Nico himself.

Like a reptile, he had cold blood. Empathy was relatively unknown to him. The few jobs he did were those no one would have accepted in a million years—murders, thefts, even hijackings. He did them all with no problems and no moral qualms either. That coldness stayed throughout his life and leaked into things more personal.

He had never been truly lucky in love, or at least lucky enough to keep the ones he had. His conquest list consisted mainly of one night stands, or three months at the most. When they realized it wouldn't work out, many of them turned to anger. They called him cold hearted, just as his enemies called him cold blooded.

Nico paid attention to none of it. He was fine with what he had always had. He didn't need warmth he had spent all his life in the cold he wasn't about to stop now.

But then one day there was something else. Someone else.

At first it, Y/N was just a simple new hire that the Marigold had bought into its liquor circles. It wouldn't be the first time Nico had gone and done a few jobs with a rookie, however it would be the first time that he would become friends with them. There was something about them that intrigued him. Maybe it was the way they matched his skill, or how they proved they were so much cleverer than him, strategized better, truly showed how much of an asset to the Marigold they were.

It surprised him, so he gave it a shot, and as most of his rare new friendships did, banter turned to flirting. Oftentimes, it was one-sided but this time Y/N responded to his advances. That was indeed a surprise too. He played along and so did they.

It was a strange thing between them, something that tiptoed on the line of friendship. Again, Nico had seen something like it before. He knew where this would end and he was right when one night, drunken from an evening spent at the hotel bar, the two of them went back to his room together.

He thought that would be it. They would both get on with their lives and that night would be forgotten, swept away with all the others.

It was far easier said than done. For the first time in years, Nico felt something in him. He wouldn't call it a fire, it was more a single spark somewhere deep in this chest. He thought it would be some sort of heartburn from a poor diet. He ignored it for the most part, and then while looking for medicine he stumbled across Y/N again.

Before long, the burn became bearable. They were his medicine.

Nico didn't understand it, but he knew what made it better. He asked Y/N out on the proper date. They took him up on it and it went relatively well.

So he asked them on another one, and soon they were asking him.

A week turned into a month, a month into two, two months into three. It was when a six month anniversary passed by in a blink of an eye that Nico truly knew something was off.

He couldn't fathom moving on in any way, and that was strange. He was happy where he was romantically. The job was always the same but somehow it became easier, more fun by his partner's side, and then he couldn't ignore it anymore.

There was the warmth.

The hot, delicious feeling that spread throughout him whenever a kiss landed on his cheek, or when their hands took his, or even when a joke turned into shameless flirting. He felt like he was getting wrapped in a large blanket, something unfamiliar but still addicting and comfortable.

More importantly, it was warm.

Very warm.

So warm, he thought his heart might burst.

He had rarely felt anything like it before, except towards his sister. Still, this was different. This was burning with another passion.

He knew something was off, but somehow, for once, he couldn't bear to try and put it right.

He liked this heat, this residue of mistake as some people might call it. His whole body was searing fire and he was too happy and intrigued to try and put it out.

[xo-zozo]

Do you have any pregnancy headcanons about avery?

awww thats so fun

~ she has really weird pregnancy cravings (like pickles and peanut butter 😭) write some in the comments

~ she's the type to have really bad mood swings (like she gets mad at jameson all of the time but he's always super sweet to her and helps her with the mood swings)

~ at first she had no morning sickness so she thought that she got lucky but later the sickness hit her like a BUS)

~ not only did she have that moring sickness but her first pregnancy is rough... like she gets heartburn, dizziness, headaches

~ jameson helps her all the time with those things and is always buying her little things to make her feel better

~ she never officially announces her pregnancy... she kinda just pulls a halle bailey and lets all of the fans figure it out for themselves or find out from the random insta post of the baby

~ she thinks it's adorable every time jameson freaks out about the baby kicking

CUTIESSS 😍😍😍 i have five more requests to do and then asks are back!!

[a-random-weeb]

hiii could i request head canons for bsd with a s/o that frequently gets heartburn 🥹

I don't know much about heartburn, so if I get any facts wrong or anything is just weird please tell me. Also, if you really do have heartburn I am so sorry you have to go through that, I would die 😭

I also don't know the exact severity of heartburn, so if it's worse or better than I make it out to be I'll rewrite it for you :)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dazai:

•He feels bad

•Hes always checking in on you especially after you're eating

•I read somewhere it's also harder to sleep, so he tries his best to help you sleep by cuddling you and giving you sleep meditation

•This is the one thing he doesn't tease you about

•He doesn't know what to do to help you with the pain (And neither do I) so he cuddles you and gets you to watch tv with him to try and distract you

•He buys you painkillers and Antacids (I did a little research for you :) well, they were quick google searches but still)

•He also makes sure you drink a lot of water, water can help

•He basically is constantly checking up on you, it's sweet to see him so concerned

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚˚ ༘

Chuuya:

•Buys you the most expensive medicine

•He is always looking out for you

•Hes actually kind of worse than Dazai when it comes to watching you

•He doesn't let you out if his sight, he's so scared of you being in pain

•He loves you too much

•Like Dazai, he's also making sure you drink a lot of water

•Bro will but you whatever you want if you think it'll help the pain

•I think he's pretty good at comforting you too

•He gets private doctors to check up on you (He's ready for whatever there is to come, he's really overprotective. Or maybe under protective, once again, idk the severity of heartburn, sorry)

‧+˚ *♡‧+˚ *♡‧+˚ *♡‧+˚ *♡‧+˚ *♡‧+˚ *♡‧

If you want me to redo it let me know and I will, tell me if I missed anything or you want me to add anything specific, or even if you just want more characters 😁

[honoviadakai]

What I think the Diaboys smell like: Mukami borthers edition

(CW: mentions of self harm in Azusa’s section and blood in all sections)

Ruki:

Top notes: old books, Tea, Herbs and spices

Bottom notes: Garlic, ink, charcoal

Ah yes

A refined smell from a refined man

This guy smells the least like a vampire

Like, the Mukami’s in general smell a tad more human than vampire, but Ruki smells the most human out of the 4 of them

And humans would never think he was a vampire based off smell alone anyway

Now in case you didn’t know, Ruki’s favorite food is soup

Why is that important?

Well it’s cuz ya boi smells vaguely of garlic, herbs and spices

Most people will believe he’s an Italian man before the idea of him being a vampire is on the table 😂

Tbh it works out in his favor and for this reason, he’s the most human passing out of all the boys

However he does give old man vibes

Why?

Cuz he smells like he works in a library that was built during ancient Roman times

He smells so concerningly of old books that I don’t blame anyone that assumes his skin is actually made of paper

He also smells like he bleeds tea

To be fair…he probably does

Caffeine doesn’t affect vampires in the same way it does humans so you bet your bottom dollar he’s drinking tea every chance he gets

You have no idea how happy he is that tea and coffee don’t give him heartburn or acid reflux anymore (╯ ‿ ╰,)

But he does go overboard with his drinking sometimes…Kou and Yuma had to hide some of his tea so he’s chill out a bit

That day, they learned that vampires can in fact go through nasty withdrawal symptoms…

Thankfully he was able to take his mind off of that with his hobbies!

He has a few but the ones he tends to do a lot , outside of reading, is calligraphy and drawing

He specifically loves using charcoal as his drawing material!

His dad used to take him out for walks and they’d draw some scenery together

His mother was the one to teach him calligraphy

Doing either of these two crafts helps him feel close to his parents again

So he’s grown to love the smell of the ink and charcoal on paper

Sometimes he gets so into his work that his nails and fingers turn black by the time he stops

His brothers can tease him all they want, but he doesn’t mind it at all

He used to get much dirtier as a child when he worked on his crafts

So having the ink and charcoal permeate his skin in both appearance and smell gives him a sense of pride

He thinks his parents would be proud of him too

Kou:

Top notes: lilies, Gucci A Chant for The Nymph Eau de Parfum, berries

Bottom notes: Vongole Bianco, Cats, blood

Omg this guy smells so nice

First of, he naturally smells like lilies

Those flowers naturally smell sweet but super subtle

He also isn’t allowed to eat lots of desserts sometimes so he found a loophole and eats a metric fuck ton of berries when his sweet tooth is acting up

He’s not picky about the kind of berries he munches on, he just wants them to be sweet enough to satisfy him

So he smells very much like the cast of the Strawberry Shortcake franchise

And to top it all off, ya boi has pretty good taste in perfume

His favorite perfume is Gucci A Chant for The Nymph Eau de Parfum

It’s a very sweet, clean smelling fragrance that he makes absolutely sure to buy every 6 months

So based off all that you’d assume he always smells nice right???

Well…not exactly

First off, he is a vampire now and he does drink blood sometimes

But he doesn’t even smell like blood because of his vampiric nature

He just claims that’s why he sometimes smells like blood because the real reason is kinda embarrassing

So he’s an idol right? Part of his job is to sign stacks and stacks of autographs

He’s gotten so many paper cuts that he just starts wearing gloves

He has very delicate skin for a vampire, not as delicate as someone else on this list but we’ll get to him

He also smells like cats

He just really likes them so sometimes he just goes to cat cafes and plays with them

He also brings in strays and takes care of them

He won’t force them to stay if they don’t want to but 9 time outta 10 they stay so he just kinda smells like his feline friends

This dude also smells of his favorite food, Vongole Bianco

If left unsupervised, he will eat 5 plates of the stuff and he will smell of the pasta dish for weeks

Not in a bad way, he’ll just smell like he recently has dinner XD

@magnificentkidclamclod and I also came to the conclusion that once in a blue moon, this man will smell like French fries

Why and why’s it so rare?

Well for one, he’s just a big fan of McDonald’s French fries as well as their sprite so he will get it every chance he gets

Now as for why he rarely has it, it’s because of his manager and Ruki

As an idol he’s expected to maintain a certain weight and figure so he’s been told not to eat fast food

When his manager catches him he’ll just scold him and give him a slap on the wrist

But if Ruki catches him…it’s on sight

If Ruki even catches a whiff of fries on Kou, he’s running at him at full speed with what we blunt object happens to be close by

Unfortunately for the other 3 brothers, Ruki is a bit of a health nut and bans fast food from the house

Kou suffers the most and Azusa is the only one who helps him sneak contraband into the house

Yuma is true neutral on this tbh

He has a garden so he doesn’t care 🤣

Kou and Azusa will share fries every weekend at the mall followed up by a trip to the spa to get rid of the smell

Yuma:

Top notes: Dirt, Sweat, Sugar

Bottom notes: Blood, Fennel, Neem oil

Man is a farmer to his very core!

Doesn’t matter if he’s human or vampire, he’s gonna be up at 4 in the morning tending to every single one of his crops

And his scent always reminds everyone of this

He smells of the earth he tends to every day

He smells of the sweat of hard days works

And he smells of the fruits and veggies he tends and harvests

This giant bear of a man is the poster child of a rugged country boy 🤠

He also smells pretty sweet!

He eats sugar cubes so often that everyone’s amazed he hasn’t gotten diabetes yet

He also smells of fennel and neem oil

Those are really good, natural bug repellents

He’ll eat the fennel to keep the mosquitoes off him

He doesn’t need to cuz mosquitoes tend to avoid vampires but he did this a lot when he was human and old habits die hard

He sprays neem oil on and around his crops to keep pests away

All of these smells permeate into his being and set the gold standard of what your big, strong country boy should smell like

There is one thing that kinda weirds humans out though

He smells a tad like blood

It’s no where near as bad as the Sakamakis or the Taukinamis

But it’s juuuuust strong enough that sometimes his classmates will stop and ask him if he’s feeling ok

Thankfully his country boy aesthetic can save him from suspicion

Sometimes he’ll show them a cut he got from when he tried to clean the shattered remains of a pot and they’ll immediately drop the issue

Of course the dude who tends crops is gonna smell like blood! Hard physical work makes you bleed sometimes!

That’s all it is right?

🙂

He’s lucky he’s got such a water tight excuse cuz when he does drink blood, he gets a bit messy

Thankfully he cleans up after himself right away

Azusa:

Top notes: Blood, Shichimi Togarashi, curry powder

Bottom notes: Rubbing alcohol, fresh bandages, leather

Oh Azusa…

You beautiful, precious little masochist…

This one is the least human passing of the Mukami brothers and it’s not too hard to see why…

First off, he smells like the inside of a hospital morgue 💀

He smells like rubbing alcohol, bandages and blood

The strongest smell being the blood…

And here’s the thing

It’s his own blood that people are usually smelling

Yeah, sometimes it’s someone else’s blood

But 9 times outta 10 he smells like blood because he gave himself a few fresh cuts

And it’s usually a concerningly large amount of blood

He has the most delicate skin out of all his brothers

I’m also convinced he might have been anemic when he was human and maybe even still is

So combine all that and Azusa is basically a gusher

Thankfully he always has bandages on him

Unfortunately he doesn’t do much to cover up the bloody smell…

He does like spicy food so he tends to eat quite a bit of curry

So he does smell like curry powder sometimes

He also smells like his favorite food, Shichimi Togarashi

It’s basically like a seaweed mix

But it’s not enough to change very the weird bloody hospital smell he permanently has on him

Ruki does use the “He has anemia” card to make people less suspicious…but then Azusa gives Ruki a heart attack

Hell ask people if they wanna cut him

That’s not exactly normal human behavior so his brothers will step in and prevent him from doing anything to blow their cover

He also just naturally smells like leather

It’s very subtle but it’s nice!

As stated in Kou’s second, he also smells of French fries

He really likes McDonald’s fries…when they’re cold…

It weirds Kou out but he’s getting fries with his lil bro so he does his best to ignore it

[nei-ning]

Me earlier this week: God, my acne has been so strong and bad for days! Even washing my face hasn't helped with a soap for acne. All these have to be because of my hormones and upcoming periods next week.

Me today: My acne seems to be getting even worse! What the hell!? I hate this! ... ... ... I think I will google what makes acne more worse. Google: "People with acne should avoid sugar."

Me: ... ... ... *realizes I've eat 6 x 200g big chocolate bars this week* ... ... ... NO WONDER MY FACE BLOOMS!

But yeah, in all seriousness, I KNOW I eat too much chocolate. Hell, I basically LIVE by eating ONLY chocolate. I don't eat junk food almost at all. I might buy mini vegetable burger once a month when I visit nearby city. Pizza and kebab I eat rarely too. Maybe one pizza per month (from store) with a luck so to say.

Anyway, all that sugar and fat makes my skin all over the body greasy and I hate that - not to mention those acne pimples on my cheeks and jawlines (right side worse) AND those darn pimples are spreading behind my ears and towards the back of my neck!

I'm also overweight. I calculated one day I have 20-25 kilos too much weight. I weight 88 kilos, while being 163cm tall, while I should weight 65 at max. But hell, I would be happy even with 70 or 75 kilos!

I KNOW I've brought this to myself, I'm not asking anyone's pity etc. I'm just ranting out my own frustration about myself, lack of self-control, self-discipline etc. I just sit and eat chocolate, and sleep. That's honestly all I do. Every day, around the clock. I had motivation more when I had Verti with me but when he died... it all left me too. Nothing in my life hasn't feel the same anymore after his death - and it soon has been a year since he passed.

I want to try to drop chocolate out next month. I mean I have been able to be without any sweets in the past and back then I felt SO ALIVE and so good! I want to feel that again. I also want to try to start to eat more vegetables, fruits etc. next month. The issue just, sadly, is that most things give me so horrible heartburn that it honestly feels like my stomach is burning out through my body like some acid. I am not kidding. That is strong and horrible feeling and no meds help to it. That's why my eating is very limited.

If anyone wants to drop me any tips, hints, recipes etc. about healthier food, vegetarian food, taking care of acne (no meds! I asked meds once from nurse and she just said: "Taking care of acne is long and hard process.". She refused to treat me) and exercise tips or motivation, please, leave a comment or contact me via chat!

Thanks!

[melonishus]

Hi there I was wondering if you could do any wholesome Rosebird moments?

[Raven looked at her first paycheck from being a huntress and sniffed it curiously as Summer passed by her]

Summer - What are you up to ?

Raven - Got payed for doing things for people

Summer- Feels good doesnt it

Raven - [shakes head] Didnt you tell me that huntresses were meant to do things because they were right ? To make the world a better place ?

Summer - Well yes, but we still do need money to buy food and other neccesary things. To survive

Raven - I can hunt. This feels …unneccesary

Summer- Well….keep it. You might need it one day …….

[Years later, Summer leaned over her table before graduation and sighed]

Raven - Summer ?

Summer- [wipes tears from eyes] What is it ?

Raven - Are you ok ?

Summer - Yes…no [ sighs] It's just…my father died

[Raven sat next to her]

Summer- I have nowhere to go after I graduate. I'll be homeless

[Raven paused for a second ]

Summer- I don't know what to do

Raven - You can stay with me

Summer- I'm not much of a survivalist Rae

Raven - You'll be surviving but….[ gets up and walks to her bed, pulling out a trunk]

Summer- [looks at it curiously]

[Raven opens it to reveal an obscene amount of Lien]

Summer- RAVEN !

Raven - ?

Summer- Where did you get all this money ?!

Raven - It's my huntress money

Summer - You dont get payed this much

Raven - All of it. Since I started getting it

Summer- ?!

Raven - It wasn't necessary. So I saved it in case someone needed it. In case YOU needed it

Summer - I cant take all this from you !

Raven - You won't . You'll be finding us a house

Summer- …..

Raven - Growing up I was taught that the tribe was everything. And you three are my tribe. So ….find us one that can handle at least 4 people…

[Summer hugged her]

Raven - [slowly but deliberately hugs back]

Summer - What do you mean "At least"

Raven - I'm getting the feeling that there's something more to this heartburn …..

-----------

Writing Requests are OPEN

[dragonmuse]

Tagged by @internerdionality to share the first lines of ten of my most recent fanfics! <3 I've only done the last six or so, otherwise we're going back a long ways.

Izzy Gets Reverse Big Banged Voyage Unknown, a small production full of unknowns, took streaming by storm last January. One small, beautiful set and ten actors almost entirely unknown except for leading man, Hugh Reuben (Traitor’s Canyon, Oscar-nominated for Vicious) captured the hearts of many.

A Candle in the Slush In the gray slushy days after New Year’s, Lucius kept up the fairy lights he’d hung in his apartment window for extra light. The world seemed turned against him. Puddles were stepped in, misunderstandings at work put him behind deadlines, and for three days in a row he forgot to buy more creamer, forced to drink his coffee black which always gave him heartburn.  

In an octopus' garden with you The thing about being madly, truly, dangerously in love was that it made you want to spread it around. Jim was pretty disgusted by this turn of events, having spent years evading such matchmaking with a dedication usually reserved for avoiding enemy fire.

Leda House Extras: Chapter 214: Me and You and the Lost The moon crested the night sky, nearly full, and the wind stirred through dead leaves, crackle crackle crackle. The air carried the promise of frost. Charlie crunched through them, walking down the middle of the road. The bottle that hung loosely from his fingers slosh slosh, occasionally the glass hit gently against his father’s ring, ting. 

The Tell-Tale Twat “There it is again,” Ed’s hand crept into Stede’s “It’s just the wind,” Stede kissed his shoulder. “Really, darling. The horrible moan increased, shivering through the house. “That’s the wind,” Ed said flatly. “A very aggressive breeze off the sea.”

She's Beauty, She's Grace, She'll Punch You in the Face “Come on, come on,” she muttered into the phone. “Pick up....” “J?” Dad’s voice came over the phone and she would cry if she did that sort of thing. “Where are you?” “I’m at the county lockup! Pop took me to dinner and he got pulled over for not using his turn signal and did you know he has an outstanding warrant?” “Oh my fucking god,” Dad said tiredly. “I did not know, but please imagine my surprised Pikachu face.”

I'll tag @napneeders @thetragicallynerdy and anyone else interested. It's early in the day, my brain is refusing to recall names.

[strideofpride]

13 books

tagged by @areseebee, thank you!

1. The last book I read:

luster by raven leilani. i didn't love it but i'm really curious to see what she does next, i think this was her debut novel. i also was given it when i signed up for some mystery book delivery service from an indie bookstore in austin i heard about from here - bookpeople i think, highly recommend them, they also had sent me heartburn and girls can kiss now in that same order!

2. A book I recommend:

this is the story of a happy marriage. a must read for any writer

3. A book that I couldn't put down:

i devoured the midnight library in mere days. ugh god it really spoke to me

4. A book I've read twice (or more):

bossypants by tina fey. i have most of it memorized by this point lol

5. A book on my TBR:

little women. i wanna read it for real but liz has warned me that it's kinda christian and can get preachy so it hasn't been on top of the pile

6. A book I've put down:

the kennedys: america's emerald kings - i've always been obsessed with the kennedys but this was just only focused on their irish roots and how it influenced them and tbh i didn't really care enough about that lol

7. A book on my wish list:

i have so many books on my tbr (aka on top of my bookshelf), i'm trying not to buy more right now until i finish all of them but god i really really want to get that sofia coppola archive book

8. A favorite book from childhood:

i loooove the whole luxe series so so much. it's gossip girl set in the gilded age basically, and i've loved those books since i was like 10 lol

9. A book you would give to a friend?

not in the habit of giving away my books lol but maybe i could part with my copy of paper towns (easily my favorite john green)

10. There is no 10!

11. A nonfiction book you own?

the power broker. my white whale. one day i'll actually finish you

12. What are you currently reading?

the seven husbands of evelyn hugo. i like it but don't love it. i keep thinking about this tweet i saw the other week, about sometimes you read a book nowadays and you can tell it was written with a screen adaptation in mind

13. What are you planning on reading next?

i think it's time i finally read pride & prejudice!

tagging @terrainofheartfelt @blairwaldcrf @userlaylivia @katebeckets @bigszs @baezdylan @useragarfield @insistonyourcupofstars

[dipolardruid]

hello! I love your characters can I make a reaction request for stepmom?

In my mind I have this image of the reader being a big fan of spicy things so every time the stepmother sees the reader eating something she would say:

Betra: what are you putting in the hot chocolate?

reader: hot sauce.

(At breakfast)

Betra: what's that dust on your pancakes?

Reader: Ghost Chili Powder

Spice is love, Spice is life

Tw: None

"Maybe you should take it down a notch with the spice." Betra says as she watches you pour hot sauce into the hot chocolate "No, I'm good." Betra doesn't say anything but cringes as she watches you drink it.

She looks towards your father only for him to give her a shrug "Their happy with it so I don't see a problem." Betra sighs in defeat as she watches you go on normally.

At the very beginning when she'd only visit she never really saw anything that was until she started sleeping over, That's when she'd see the hotsauce always in reaching distance especially in the morning it wasn't until her day off when she'd gotten up to make herself her usual breakfast she'd catch you pouring it into your hot chocolate.

She never said anything at the time but did stare at you in complete bewilderment and had to double take a couple of times thinking she was still dreaming until you had offered some "No, I'm alright thank you."

From there she watched your eating habits realizing hot sauce was in every meal even some that were very questionable just like the pancake incident when you decided to make everyone some breakfast and once you had sat down she noticed you had starting putting red powder quite a bit at that.

"What are you putting on your pancakes?" She looks at the amount that now covers your food.

"Oh it's Ghost chili powder." She looks up at you eyes wide open "what...?" You ask confused, you watch as Betra exhales and looks at your father before back at you "Are you sure the amount of spice you eat is safe? I mean you atleast have to suffer some type of heartburn or stomach pain." You take a bite making direct eye contact with Betra before slowly shaking your head no.

During that time she tried to keep her thoughts on the low but once she married your father that's when she'd let her thoughts be known with more liberty.

Even going as far as to hide your spices as a way to lower the amount you eat only to end with failure as you'll go and buy more spicier ones, so at that point she'll just leave you be but she will talk to you about the amount you consume out of worry but in the end she knows she can't force you to stop but at least convince you to calm it down.

Betra might even try some of your spices with the consequence of drooling from the pain and not trying it again, she is not a fan of spices at all she uses the reason of wanting to actually taste her food savoring every bite and not be in increasing pain with every bite.

The times she gets a sudden bout of courage to try your spices your father will be ready to give her some yogurt or bread to help with the burning while holding in a laugh which she will notice and give him the stink eye in the process.

Please show her a bit of patience she just doesn't understand why you'd do that to yourself but once she gets used to it she'll even start buying you them while she's out and about to see you're reaction to certain ones as a way to keep note on your likes and dislikes.

So in the end she'll end up encouraging your love of spices at a safe amount of course.

Request are open!

[colorisbyshe]

aces face medical discrimination that allos don’t.

I'm only answering this discourse ask because this is like... really... really harmful rhetoric.

If we're talking about HSDD (Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder), I have a tag to debunk any point you want to bring up. It's an older tag, so it might not be incredibly up to date but it covers a lot.

But in the broader sense... no, y'all don't. I'm sure individual doctors can be discriminatory or not understanding but... that's true of anything. There are licensed fucking doctors who think vaccines are fake and filled with trackers. Some doctors jsut fucking suck.

What you need to understand is, doctors expressing concern that your lack of sexual desire is connected to either mental health or physical health isn't discrimination but rather a legitimate medical concern.

Being gay can't be caused by cancer. Being straight can't be caused by depression. There is no state of being that can really alter which gender you prefer. There mgiht be extreme cases of trauma where maybe someone stops pursuing relationships with a specific gender or whatever but that's VERY fringe AND would STILL be something you should talk to about with a professional. Not to "fix" necessarily but to better understand and process.

But... lack of libido, which has HEAVY HEAVY HEAVY fuckign overlap with lack of sexual attraction (or even just lack of perceived sexual attraction), can absolutely be caused by cancer or trauma or depression or a hormonal disorder or internalized homophobia or internalzied fatphobia. There are conditions where some people are SOOOO shamed for sexuality that it is literally impossible to penetrate theri vagina without extreme pain. Reactions to sexual desire and attraction and behaviour can affect your perception of said things (and vise versa).

Most of the time, a doctor will not care if you tell them this has just how you felt your entire life. HSDD already has a little annotation saying "Hey! Some people just don't feel sexual desires, that's fine! No treatment needed :)"

But sometimes... they need to know if this is a symptom, especially if this a new/sudden revelation.

Framing doctors doing basic work to figure out if you are experiencing a health problem as "aphobia" is going to prevent a LOT of vulnerable people from getting the healthcare they deserve and nEED.

And I've seen some of y'all fucking weirdos saying that if you're ace/celibate you don't need pap smears, which is fucking insane.

Asexuals and people who mistakenly think they are asexuals because of health conditions--which are not the majority but certainly do exist--need full check ups just liek the rest of us.

There are bad doctors out there. There are doctors who haven't heard of asexuality before. I am not denying that. Again, there are doctors who think vaccines are fake, who won't believe you when you say you're having allergy symptoms, and who will try to diagnose your chest pain as heartburn and send you on your way.

But a doctor meeting your "I'm ace" with, "Hey, will you consent to a hormone work up?" or "Hey, are you doing alright? Do you have any history of trauma" is not an aphobic assault on your sensibilities. It is not comparable to converion therapy or a doctor telling a gay person they are lying or need to be fixed.

And I've said ti before--a doctor is MUCH MUCH MUCH more likely to prescribe you something that KILLS your sex drive, makes you wholly disinterested in sex, makes it nearly impossible to even tell if you are experiencing sexual attraction, than they are to be invested in making sure every random patient wants to fuck and is attracted to random people on the street.

Most doctors do not care if the life saving/changing shit they prescribe you alters your sex drive at all. Won't even fucking tell you if it's a side effect. It's not on their mind. Your sex life is not on their mind unless it is affecting your health.

Anyways, last ask I am touching on the matter. Buy me something, prove you bought me something, and maybe I'll consider talking more

[mister-eames]

I know it’s been said before, but you spark so much joy with your headcanon & arthur/eames discussions 🥺 also! Still thinking of that pic of Tom Hardy in a muscle tee & other recent photos of him where he is lots of grey in his beard. Idk if you saw JGL at the ceremony where he presented rian Johnson with an award but he had a deep velvet plum suit on, a beard and his hair is long & wavy. & now I’m thinking about older eames/Arthur who are comfortable happy and still sickeningly in love

Nonnie!!!!!!! Thank you so much for stopping by, these asks always are so thought provoking and indulge me so much, I'm always happy to talk about Arthur/Eames and Inception in general!

Okay so, I had not seen that video and I am SO GLAD you brought it to my attention. JGL LOOKS SO FREAKING GOOD!!! THE SUIT!!! THE BEARD!!! THE CURLS!!!!!! Oh my god. If anyone has not seen the video check it out here you wont regret it.

And, you said it -- "Comfortable, happy and (still) sickeningly in love" is all I want for Arthur and Eames (and my life tbh). My headcanon is that they settle down and retire and while they still dabble in a little criminal action here and there (like being criminally sexy!!!) they live quieter lives a handful of years after the Fischer job. They love each other, right? They want to be safer because they want to build a life over building dreams, because life can be so short, you know, and I think in the film you learn just that--anything can happen at any given moment and you just...slow the hell down. Even when that means taking life in the slow lane and changing course - and so they do.

I imagine Arthur and Eames in their forties and fifties, teaching and consulting for work - Eames being disgusted every time he does his taxes and Arthur being disgusted with himself for wearing polo shirts in the summer and secretly loving it. They are starting to go grey, more grey with every handful of years - they are starting to go soft in places. There are crows eyes and forehead lines and heartburn and creaky bones. Diets to manage IBS and blood pressure. Worse, they start to do things their parents used to do -- like watch the news on TV and mutter into their dinner about idiot politicians and neighbours who park like dickheads on the street and wont trim their trees back out of their yard, and they reminisce about how things were different when they were kids and seriously why the fuck are they the only normal people who live on this street?

They keep busy. They learn new things. For his forty-fifth birthday Arthur builds Eames a library in their Philadelphia home with his bare hands. Eames buys the battered skeleton of a '67 Ford Mustang and restores it for Arthur. They read books and watch movies in bed and keep guns in their bedsides just in case. They go on long drives together and still sometimes travel the world to see old faces and so they still remember what it feels like to be homesick and miss the good life. Eames' knees play up. Arthurs back has seen better days. They're uncles to their siblings kids and to Phillipa and James. And they take that job very seriously.

They still have their domestics and spats every now and then. But they make up and move on. They're partners (in life and crime) and they get their thrills out of making the other happy. They're the people the other cannot wait to come home to.

They have always attempted to manufacture their own luck and they finally did it because here they are, content and happy.