#but whether that's true or not I feel like I got set back in the way I'd processed the break-up again
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miss-tc-nova · 2 days ago
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With Reckless Choices - Leona Kingscholar x Reader Pt 5
Yes, I'm aware my premise descriptions suck. I don't know how to write these things without giving away the whole damn plot. Sorry.
Premise: Leona exposes some weak points
Words: 1,951
Music Inspirations: Forget You Now - Big Time Rush
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~~~The Consequences of Petty~~~
               Fists clench tight enough they might draw blood, not that I care. Right now, the only thing that matters is getting as far as I can away from the royalty. It takes every shred of self-control I have not to fly through the halls and slam my bedroom door behind me, but I manage. Though the lock clicks harshly.
               Immediately, my hands reach beneath the mattress for my phone, his face lighting up the lockscreen. Even as the words blur in my sight, I tap away.
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               Instant regret sets in. I shouldn’t have sent those. However, before I have any chance of taking back my tantrum, I see the dots pending a response.
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               I really shouldn’t have done that, but it’s too late to take it back now. Pacing the room, I scramble to compose my frustration. But even as I do, another message comes.
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               He’s in the midst of typing more, but I do as he asks.
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               I know it’s not, yet I still have responsibilities. But I’ve also crossed a line that’s not easy to take back. The tears won’t stop dripping and the anger bubbling in my chest brings about pathetic hiccups.
               Magic easily whisks me far away from my offenders, granting me instant access to the room of my lion. Immediately, I plop onto his bed, trying to focus on his remnant scent rather than the events leading to my impromptu visit.
               Then Leona arrives, door nearly slamming shut and the lock taking hold.
               “What happened?” Straight to the point.
               I groan at the trouble I’ve cause. Wiping my face feels futile but I hate to have him see me like this. “It’s nothing. I just felt a little overwhelmed at the fitting and got put in my place. Honestly, by now one would think I’d be used to how they treat me.”
               In my best efforts, I put on a smile. Leona does not return the sentiment. Instead, anger seethes off him. Reaching out, I let the man pull me back on my feet. He’s suspiciously quiet, but lets me step into his arms to hide my face and quell my resentment.
               The next few hours pass in much better company. I dwell not on what happened but on this moment with Leona and, soon enough we’re up to our usual catty antics.
               A hand lifts to cover my mouth as I laugh. “Active reform isn’t a term I would immediately associate with you. Sorry Leo.”
               “Yeah yeah.”
               His chin rests on my shoulder. Above Sunrise City, Leona and I peer across the night-addled capital of his country. From the balcony of his room, the wondrous city of civilization and wilderness begins to settle as lights set aglow across the land. It’s so vastly different from my own, but perhaps that’s why I find it so intriguing.
               “But hell, Kifaji keeps riding me about making myself useful as a member of the royal family, then immediately shuts down whatever I say.”
               “Well stuff that crochety old bird.” I love that baritone laugh in my ear. “I think you’d make a decent king.”
               “’Decent?’”
               It’s my turn to laugh. “Come now. You know you need someone to temper that ego of yours. Or at the very least convince you to get out of bed.”
               “Oh yeah? And I bet you think that someone’s you, right?”
               I can’t fight the smile on my lips.
               His head bumps against mine. “Now who’s got an ego?”
               “Probably still you.” Reflexively, I lean into his affection. “But I know you could do great things—whether or not you’re king. You could change lives for the better.”
               “I’m not sure my ego is that big.”
               I laugh. “It’s true. You changed mine.”
               There’s a lapse in his response. Suddenly, my heart hitches. Leona’s nose skims my neck, goosebumps creeping across my skin as warm breath whispers against it. My fingers slide into his hair, encouraging his attention. However, at the feel of his fangs, kind fingers turn cruel, pulling him off.
               “Leonaaa,” I warn lowly. A breathy growl retorts. “We talked about this: no marks.”
               Retreat comes with a huff. “One of these days you’re gonna leave here marked head to toe.”
               “Yeah right.” Turning in his grasp, I press a finger to his chest. “You, on the other hand, are free and clear to be marked.” That harlequin gaze closely follows the tongue that traces my lip. “I quite like the sound of that. Great and mighty Leona Kingscholar—marked as mine.”
               “You’re outta yer mind.”
               “Come now.” A line drawn from his collar to his jaw using my tongue causes tension in him. “Wouldn’t it be so lovely on that beautiful skin of yours. Let me show you my desire—just a taste of the things I want to do to you.”
               Our proximity is the only reason I detect the quiver in his exhale. “You could at least fight fair.”
               “Oh you can’t fool me. I bet you’re thrilled. You can’t wait to feel my mouth on you.” It’s his turn to bristle with goosebumps while my lips ghost across his neck. “Because I know you’re dying to know what I would do. Isn’t that right?”
               Surprise and pride fuel my lust when the haughty man has no answer. So I make good on my words.
               The feel of his hands digging into my back as I latch onto his neck is so gratifying. Spiced citrus fills my nose while my tongue presses against the spot I chose. This time, the shudder that escapes comes more noticeably. With each little movement, Leona’s body betrays his cool composure. Even his voice gives away his weakness with each pitiful whimper he fails to contain.
               I could ride this high forever, coasting on the toxic fervor of having this man under my control. His strength, his power, his smarts, cunning, charm—his attention: all of it belongs to me. Everything I’ve ever wanted exists in this moment and I want more.
               I really never had a chance.
               My hold breaks, making way for my tongue to clean up the mess. Another shiver wracks his chest at the feeling. What’s left behind is a beautiful, violet stain against his olive skin. That mark along with his embarrassed expression—I couldn’t be more thrilled.
               “What’s wrong, Leo,” I purr, tracing my work with a finger.
               Ears flat, eyes clenched shut, Leona recomposes himself. When he turns on me again, I’m met with a gaze of burning hunger.  
               The rumble of his voice hits like a shot of adrenaline. “You’re gonna regret that.”
               My lips quirk. “I’d never regret claiming you.”
               His mouth descends on mine, that ravenous mouth devouring everything I offer and more. Lips crash together eagerly, stealing kiss after kiss. His tongue asks for no permission before finding its way into my mouth to claim all it can reach. Space no longer exists between us. That rapid thumping between us is no longer distinguishable and can only be described as our heartbeat. I thought that I wanted more, but Leona is demanding it.
               However, greed breaks softer than it began. It appears that predator’s façade is wavering though that spark of desire holds true. Hot breath mingles together, not a word breaking through. His brows furrow, almost conveying pain. That grip has only gotten tighter, even his tail coiling around my leg.
               I never could’ve prepared for his admission.
               “I love you.”
               My mouth hangs open, struck speechless.
               It’s hard to believe that this is the same man that so coyly convinced me to indulge in this taboo. All that haughty, smug attitude is gone, baring a brutal honesty that I’m sure he’s never shown before. My heart may just burst.
               Finally, some of that elation manages to respond.
               “I love you too.”
               Rather than another kiss, Leona pulls me flush against him in the purest embrace.
               This is where I belong.
               A buzzing sends my stomach lurching. Immediately, a hand flies to my pocket to silence the alarm. Disappointment immediately washes over us. I really don’t want to.
               “I should go…”
               His face nuzzles against my hair. “Or you could stay.”
               “I can’t. I have to attend dinner with some potential trade ambassadors. You know that.”
               His heavy sigh cracks at my heart.
               “Besides, I believe you also have some ambassadorial duties to attend to, right? Something with the Scalding Sands?”
               A groan is muffled in my shoulder.
               “Come on, Leona.” I encourage with an affection head bump.
               Reluctantly, the lion pulls away, his touch lingering against my skin until I’m physically out of reach. I already miss it. Poorly contained woe rolls off him, seeping into my weakened heart. This is always the worst part of our relationship.     
               “I’ll see you soon.”
               Thorough hands straighten my clothes. In some attempt to regain contact I’m sure, Leona reaches out to fix my hair for me. When his hand rests against my cheek, I smile.
               “Good night.”
               With a dip of his head, one last kiss graces my forehead.
               “Night.”
               It takes sheer willpower for me to turn away from the prince. In my usual fashion, I draw a line through the air. Sparks of magic trace my movement, parting space to insert a doorway to somewhere far away. Though my heart yearns to stay, I step through the portal into what is my bedroom.
               I peer back through the magic. Regret sits on his face as he watches. Unfortunately, this isn’t something I can change. Still, I hate to see him like this. With my hopes, I blow a kiss, elated to draw even the smallest simper from my surly lion before the portal closes.
               With that, I hastily strip of my clothes and bustle into the shower where I scrub my skin nearly raw. Wild wind whips across my skin in my haste to dry off and I pull on a new set of clean clothes. Once I’m clean and presentable, I pick up the bottle of perfume gifted to me and proceed to spritz generously.
               Lastly, before I leave the room, I retrieve the velvet box from the nightstand. Inside sits an intricate silver ring twisted with black meant to resemble briar thorns. At the top, a glittering peridot nestles among the strands. On my finger I slip the ring, just as someone knocks on my door.
               The usual guard, Silver, calls through the door. “Your highness, dinner is nearly ready and our guests are here.”
               “Thank you.”
               I follow the royal guard down to the dining hall where chattering can be heard. Introductions give names to faces and nations.
               As we make our way to the dining hall, one of our guests addresses me.
               “That is a lovely perfume you’re wearing,” she compliments.
               I rest a hand against the arm of the man at my side. “Thank you. I’m told it’s made from the briar roses grown in the castle’s very own garden. It was a gift.”
               “No doubt from your wonderful fiancé.”
               How easy it is to wear this comedy mask. “Of course.”
               The dragon speaks. “You’ve been wearing it quite a lot recently.”
               The slightest fear burns in my ears. “Unfortunately, I lost the bottle for some time in my closet and only just found it again.”
               I didn’t lose it.
               “I see.” He glances me up and down just once. “Then no doubt you’ll be needing more soon.”
               “Oh yes, that would be much appreciated.”
~~~~~
Part 6 (Coming Soon)
Nova’s Twisted Wonderland Masterlist
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millysastroblog · 8 hours ago
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⚡️Solar return chart 2022⚡️
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Hello I’m am back with SR Chart observation as I promised from 2022, these are just personal observations and experiences if you haven’t experienced any sorts of things that’s complete fine. These are not facts neither predictions so don’t panic and think that the same situation will manifest for you. Alright ??? 😉
yeah let’s just get into it ! 🫶🏽
⚡️Cancer Rising:
This placement literally made me emotionally expressive and MOODY more than ever. From the start of that year i stayed at home for literally 3- 4 months after I dropped out of school. I very much enjoyed being at home with my family, cooking, cleaning doing domestic stuff . It was very interesting how the people in my environment started being very supportive and protective over my well-being like those of a little child. I definitely expressed my emotions openly : like randomly crying , huge outburst of laughter , or simply smiling a lot. I felt more caring and nurturing towards others . Thought about moving out surfaced a lot. Cancer is a very comforting energy but since it’s ruled by the moon there a lot of drastic unstable changes that could occur in once live.
⚡️Moon , North Node in the 12th house:
This placement brought a profound sense of isolation and introspection. I found myself naturally drawn to solitude, spending hours meditating, practicing yoga, or simply enjoying peaceful moments in nature. It felt like a spiritual awakening—connecting deeply with my intuition and exploring dreams that often felt like messages from a higher source. Meditation and Manifestation became a daily practice. While these moments of stillness were empowering, they also highlighted an inner restlessness and a desire to understand my true purpose. This phase was about healing, embracing the unknown, and surrendering to the flow of life.
⚡️Sun, Neptune, Jupiter in the 10th house:
Career and life path became the central focus during this time. I found myself dreaming bigger, envisioning a life where my efforts and aspirations aligned perfectly. I applied to different companies and got a new good job, I was in my hustling and bag area it was pretty good and productive year. I started thinking about the impact I wanted to have in the world like how I wanted to be perceived and what achievements I wanted to be known for. It was all about refining my goals, building a stronger work ethic, and setting the stage for future success.
⚡️SR Rising in natal 3rd house:
Communication became a major theme since I had went to a lot of interviews, had to reintroduce myself to different people which pushed me out of my comfort zone. Also writing job applications, or reconnecting with siblings, it felt like the universe was nudging me to refine my voice and share my thoughts more clearly. Short-distance travels were frequent, giving me a sense of curiosity.
⚡️Venus, Mars, Pluto in the 8th house:
Now these placements fucked meee upppp and I really mean they fucked my life up and turned it to 180
With Pluto being in my 8th house, the intensity of this year was amplified 10x. The 8th house rules transformation, trauma, money, intimacy, and taboo topics, so this energy hit hard. At the start, I was determined to open a bank and savings account, but it took forever with endless complications. I became obsessed with earning money—whether through my own efforts or others' help. Mars pushed me to focus on loans, investments, and financial security, while Venus amplified my desire for deep, soul-bonding relationships, intimacy, and, let’s be real... a lot of … Pluto, however, had other plans, flipping my world upside down. It made me face every fear and trauma regarding death, losing loved ones, intimacy, change, love, and even illness. I got sick for six months straight, lost friends, stability, and other things. It led to a mild depression, but in true 8th house fashion, I rose stronger. Now, I feel like Wonder Woman nothing and no one can shake me. I survived the storm, and that’s power. 💪🔥
⚡️Saturn in the 9th house:
Soo with this Saturn placement your girl has been hustling for good grades in school to not fail for the year. like since then I hated going to school bc it very stressful, and bad for my well-being , like I was always tense and stressed bc of school, in our normal societal living that is very much expected from us but honestly I just wasn’t having it. And even when i changed to another school it was the same shit like the environment and people were very cold ,strict and depressing I honestly didn’t had a nice time at school but at least I was motivated to study and learn as much as I can but at the end I decided to rather drop out because it was fucking with mental health. Also traveling long as hours for work and school purposes drove me crazy, that’s an area where I have been very disciplined at but It definitely took patience and determination to get there ;) .
⚡️Uranus, Chiron in the 11th house:
Guese who tf lost all their friends suddenly ??? And had a hard time fitting in new social groups because they felt different from everyone else:
🙋🏽‍♀️
(but no for real the energy is 10x intensified bc I have it natally additionaly Saturn is transiting my natal 11th house so yeah 🙁) not only did I loose most of friends but when engaging with different kinds of social groups I felt so uncomfortable and weird, like I had a very detached feeling. I hated to even be surrounded by groups of ppl that don’t hold the same value to mine or I that I can’t engage in intellectual topic of my interest. I was mostly bored asf when in interactions and stoped giving a fuck about trying too fit in and please their expectation and needs, I surely saw also trough the fake persona of a lot of ppl that I encountered and distanced myself even more. But It was that easy being all alone and isolated.
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planetaryupscaled · 1 month ago
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Best Friends Share Everything
Male Reader x Yunjin x Karina
Tags: 18k, smut, creampie, oral, threesome, tw
The story is not ours, we alternate the original story to match our desired settings.
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Yunjin tugged at her clothes. “Look, can’t we just get naked again? This shirt itches. And these pants are too tight.”
“I’m not comfortable either, but your friend will be here soon. We can put up with it for one evening.” I said, “And then I get to undress you. I hardly ever get to do that anymore. Taking off your clothes always feels like Christmas.”
Yunjin smiled and shook her head, then went back to tidying up her living room. I turned back to preparing dinner before her best friend arrived.
Hearing Yunjin complain about wearing clothes was such a remarkable change from the shy, reluctant girl I’d met only three months before. When we first met, I discovered a girl inhibited by years of shame, guilt and fear about sex and men instilled by her extremely strict upbringing. She had barely dated anyone, and had only had sex couple times with the same inexperienced guy.
After our weekend of camping and sexual adventure, she became a changed woman. Yunjin still felt some shame when we were together, but the fear was gone and she was rapidly releasing her pent-up desires and curiosity about sex. Such a beautiful transformation to witness. I admired her courage and loved that I was the target of Yunjin’s blossoming sexual freedom.
Surprisingly, the nudity helped. It was new to us both, but whether she was at my place or hers, she insisted we shuck off our clothes the moment we closed the apartment door. Just doing normal things without clothes felt great, and somehow it helped us to be more open with each other. It was more difficult to keep secrets when all your intimate bits are on full display. We were so used to being naked that it wasn’t sexual, just, freeing.
Regardless, I still caught myself staring at her beauty. Yunjin had modest boobs with an unusually narrow waist that flared out to womanly hips and an ass that was broad and toned. I could look at her all day and never grow tired.
Yunjin had invited her best friend Karina for dinner as a thank you, of sorts. I knew Karina a little through one of my close friends, and it was her who suggested Yunjin and I should meet.
“You did actually talk to her before, right?” asked Yunjin as she fussed, straightening up her apartment.
I was at her stove, cooking. I called back, “Only a few times. It’s my friend who really knows her. She was there many times when we went out drinking.”
“Did you ever ask her out?”
“C’mon, she would have told you that. She’s your best friend. No, I never got to know her that well. I thought she was already taken.”
“Oh, she’s constantly ‘taken’. Then ‘untaken’. And ‘taken’ again. She never keeps a guy for long.”
“But she’s gorgeous,” I said.
It’s true. Karina was a beauty: tall with elegant features, tight ass, big boobs. She was a walking wet dream to most guys.
“You know, you’re not supposed to tell your girlfriend that another woman is gorgeous.”
“Oh, right. Sorry. What I meant to say was that I could see how some guys might find her attractive, but she’s a bitch compared to the radiant, heart stopping beauty of my lovely, funny and brilliant Yunjin.”
A couch cushion sailed from the living room and hit me in the back of my head.
“Hey!” I exclaimed. “No disturbing the chef or dinner will be ruined.” I tossed the cushion back to Yunjin.
“Since it’s you cooking, dinner is probably already ruined.”
“Ouch. C’mon, you have to admit I do okay for a guy. Of course, I don’t have your genetic advantage.”
Yunjin looked puzzled. “What?”
“You know… the cooking and cleaning genes that women possess. No guy can ever compete with that.”
Yunjin opened her mouth to say something but then looked at the can of furniture polish in her hand and at her made appetiser laid out on the coffee table.
We were still laughing and calling each other mean names when the bell rang.
Yunjin let Karina in and she kissed her on the cheek. When I extended my hand to shake hers, Karina pulled me close and kissed my cheek too.
“So, you’re the guy who saved Yunjin.”
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“Nice to see you again, Karina,” I said. “Save her? I prefer to think that I’ll be the ruin of her. Bet her parents think that already.”
Karina smiled. “They would if they knew what you two have been doing.”
I went back to cooking and let the girls talk. When the food was ready, Karina helped us serve. We opened some cheap wine, then I proposed a toast.
“To Karina. Who insisted Yunjin and I meet and is therefore the cause of her imminent ruin.” The girls chuckled then we clinked glasses.
From the few brief times I had talked to Karina before, I knew she was brash and straightforward, so I was a little anxious. I needed to make a good impression since the pair had been best friends since high school. Karina studying me intensely at the start of dinner didn’t help, but soon she was joking and telling embarrassing stories about Yunjin as if all of us were old friends.
“I never knew that getting your brains fucked out would have changed you so much, Yunjin.” Karina said and eyed me for a reaction.
Yunjin gasped, “Karina!”
“Well, it’s true,” said Karina. “You’ve changed so much since hooking up with this guy. I’ve tried so many times to draw you out of your shell. Guess that’s what’s made us such good friends, huh? Guy troubles.”
I poured us all more wine and said, “Okay, Karina, that’s what I don’t get. You’re beautiful and you seem to have your act together, yet Yunjin says you have trouble finding good guys. But everyone must be tripping over themselves for you.”
Karina paused, then said, “Yeah, that’s the problem.”
“Uh…”
Yunjin said, “What she means is, Karina attracts every asshole in the universe. What is it you call your theory?”
“The ‘Too Fucking Pretty’ Syndrome,” said Karina.
“Yeah, that, Arrogant assholes are always trying to get in her pants. And nice guys think they don’t stand a chance so they stay away.” said Yunjin.
“Guys have been hitting on me since I was like, eight.”
“Well, that’s disgusting,” I said.
“Welcome to my world. Everywhere its cat-calls on the street and macho dipshits who want to claim me as their trophy.”
I paused. “You know… to be honest, I think I’m guilty of that too. I never even considered approaching you when we hung out at the bars with Doyun.”
“See? Now if you had, maybe it’d be me telling Yunjin how happy I am, instead of the other way around.”
I didn’t know how to process that bizarre comment, so I said “But you can approach guys too. And online it’s easy.”
“Oh, it is. But guys see my pictures and think they’re fake, or I’m trolling. But I shouldn’t complain. I have found a few good guys.” Karina replied.
“Well, that’s great.” I said.
“One guy moved away, another guys challenging him.”
“Challenging him?”
“The ‘hey baby, drop that loser and come get with a real man’ thing. And when the assholes didn’t take ‘go fuck yourself’ for an answer, there was always a fistfight. He got tired of it. So did another guy I saw for a while.”
“Well,” I said. “Then I guess you’re screwed. Either you make yourself ugly, which would take an awful lot of work, or give up and become a nun. I hear there’s a big demand for nuns right now.”
Karina scoffed and Yunjin threw an eye at me.
Yunjin laughed, “You’re such an asshole.”
“Are all this guy’s jokes this same ‘dad joke’ level of quality?” Karina said.
“Oh, mostly,” said Yunjin. “Imagine how bad the jokes would be if he ever did become a dad? I’d have to leave him.”
Karina cast a catty look at Yunjin
“From what you told me; you almost did make him a dad.”
Yunjin blushed and lowered her eyes.
“Yeah… that was bad. I’m on the pill now.”
I interrupted. “Hold on there. Just how much did Yunjin tell you about our camping trip?”
“Everything,” said Karina and Yunjin in unison.
“Yunjin!? what the hell?” I said, dumbfounded.
“What? She’s my best friend. We tell each other everything.”
“Well, shit. Now I feel completely exposed.”
“Oh yeah, speaking of that,” said Karina, “You know, Yunjin, at school you never even got naked in the locker room. Always covered up with a towel. Then you spend a whole weekend naked with this guy? Did he hypnotize you or something?”
I leaned back and rested my hands behind my head. “It’s just my charisma and masculine charm.”
“Oh, ew,” said Karina, wrinkling her nose.
“You should try it!” Yunjin said, “It was really weird at first but then you feel, well… free. Not a care in the world.”
Karina eyed me. “Not with some guy’s ‘dick’ waggling at me all the time.”
“But it’s not like that,” said Yunjin. “Well, okay, maybe at first. But then it becomes normal and—”
Karina interrupted. “Sounds like you’ve been reading propaganda or something.”
“I don’t know,” Yunjin said. “I just know that we like it.”
“We? You mean it wasn’t just that weekend? You’re still walking around all naked even now?”
Yunjin blushed again. “Well… yeah. It’s just normal for us now. I guess we’ve kinda, like it, when we’re alone.”
“So, if I wasn’t here…” said Karina.
Yunjin shrugged, “…we’d be naked right now.”
Karina sat back in her chair and exhaled. “Holy shit. You two are crazy.”
The wine flowed as the conversation progressed. Karina was clearly intrigued, so I said, “It’s not a big deal. Why don’t you just try it?”
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I bet you’d like that.”
“Well, not now!” I said, “No, I mean try going without clothes at home sometime. Like Yunjin said, it becomes normal pretty quickly. Even my ‘dick’ used to it.” I smiled.
If we hadn’t all been a little drunk, we wouldn’t have been having such a conversation. But we were all feeling a little loose.
When dinner was cleaned up, Yunjin and I joined Karina on the couch with a fresh bottle of wine. We chatted and joked, getting to know each other, even getting into arguments about some stuff. Like Yunjin, Karina was funny and smart on current events. She made some well-considered arguments during the conversations, always with a wry sense of humour. I liked her immediately.
Karina took a gulp then said, “So how would we do this?”
“Do what?” Yunjin asked.
“Get naked. You say it’s so great. I want to try.”
“What, now? You should just do it at home.”
“But that’s not the same, is it? I’m naked at home every time I take shower. Doing it around other people is the thing. And to you two it’s normal, so… why not?”
I was shocked, and Yunjin, looking at me, seemed equally surprised.
“Karina, are you serious?” asked Yunjin.
“We always share everything, right? And where else could I try such a thing with people I know and can trust? So, how do we do this?”
“Uh, well, I don’t know. If we were to do it, I guess we could turn off the lights and see if you were comfortable.” I said.
“Okay.”
Yunjin looked at me, unsure. “Karina, it’s not a big deal for us. But I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”
“Oh relax. I’m a big girl. And like you said, it’s only skin. Just turn off the lights.”
So we turned off every light in the apartment. Only the dim night-time glow of the city through the windows lit the room. Yunjin and I undressed. It felt so good to get everything off. I took the clothes into her bedroom.
When I returned, Yunjin hugged me, her naked body warm against mine.
“Think she’ll be okay?” she asked.
“Who’s speaking, please?” I joked, groping Yunjin’s face. “I’m more concerned I won’t get to see any of her at all. It’s so dark in here.”
We looked over and Karina was a silhouette at the windows, looking out. Then she took a breath and stripped, putting her clothes on a chair. She went back to the window, her slender body an enticing outline, and stood toying with a gold chain she had kept around her neck.
Yunjin and I sat on the couch and sipped our drinks. After a few minutes, Karina came over. There was barely enough light to see even shadows. I expected Karina to sit in one of the chairs on the other side of the coffee table, but she plopped down right beside me on the couch.
“So,” she said. “How’s that ‘dick’ of yours?”
We laughed.
“Quite a way to spend an evening,” Karina said. “Sitting here naked beside my best friend’s boyfriend. And Yunjin over there… a few months ago she was certain she’d be dragged to hell if she even looked at a guy. Now she’s sitting here, tits out, sipping wine like it’s nothing.”
“I’ve been pushing my comfort zone, like you always said I should. Anyway, now that’s we’re all, uh, comfortable, we do have a dessert prepared if you’re interested.” Yunjin said
“Oh yeah! The best part of every meal.” said Karina. “What’ve you got?”
“Chocolate fondue,” answered Yunjin.
“You two planned all of this, didn’t you? What’s next, a game of naked Twister?”
Once we finished laughing at that, Yunjin got the little fondue pot and tray of fruit from the kitchen, setting it on the coffee table. She lit the candle under the pot where it cast enough light for me to see Karina more clearly. Her breasts were beautiful: large for her slender body but perfectly shaped.
“I’ve never had this,” said Karina. “How do we do this?”
“It’s easy,” said Yunjin. “Take a fork, spear some fruit from the tray, dip it in the chocolate. We have pineapple, orange slices, strawberries, grapes and gum drops.”
“Gum drops are fruit?”
“They are when you’ve run out of fruit.”
“Here you go,” I said, handing Karina one of the long fondue forks. “Careful where you aim that thing.”
“Same to you, I’ve got bigger targets than you.” She glanced towards her boobs.
We started eating. I turned to Yunjin and fed her a chocolate covered strawberry. She fed me a grape in return. Karina dipped some pineapple into chocolate and moved it towards her mouth. I watched as a glob of chocolate dripped onto one breast.
Karina saw me looking at her boob. I glanced up at her, then licked my lips like a puppy, giving her a pleading, hopeful look.
“Oh for fuck’s sake,” she laughed. “Don’t get any ideas. Got a napkin?”
Yunjin had been watching. Suddenly, she leaned across me and licked the chocolate from her friend’s boob.
Karina recoiled, covering her breast. “Yunjin, What the hell?”
Yunjin giggled. “Sorry, we’re all out of napkins.”
“Oh my God. You really are a changed woman.”
Then Karina noticed I was looking at her expectantly.
“What?” she said.
“I get to do the next one.”
Karina leaned forward and speared a strawberry. She twirled it in the chocolate then taking very deliberate aim, held it high above my lap and let a dollop of warm chocolate fall right onto the tip of my cock.
We sat there for a moment, all of us looking down at my chocolate covered dick.
Then Yunjin looked at Karina and said, “Flip a coin?”
Both girls must’ve thought that was hilarious.
“See if I ever get naked with you two again,” I said. I started to get up to look for a napkin but Karina pulled me back down, grinning wickedly. She lowered her head then licked the chocolate right off the tip of my cock.
“Karina!” exclaimed Yunjin.
Karina sat back up and said, “A good guest always cleans up her own messes.” She looked at me to gauge my reaction.
Yunjin stuck two fingers into the chocolate and reached across me to smear it on her friend’s boobs. Karina did the same to Yunjin, and when she leaned across me, her large chocolate-covered tit slid across my chest and coated me. So I pulled her head to my chest and rubbed her face against it. Karina then sat up, grabbed my head with both hands and pulled me right into her soft messy boobs, rubbing my face all around.
When it was over, the three of us had chocolate all over our faces and chests. We sat back laughing.
Yunjin came to her senses first. “Okay, everybody stand up! I don’t want to get any on the couch.”
We stood up and Yunjin turned on a table lamp. While she leaned over to examine the couch, Karina and I stood facing each other. It was the first time we were in full light since taking off our clothes. We stood there, inspecting each other’s bodies. Even smeared with chocolate, Karina was stunning and judging from the trimmed patch between her legs. Karina also checked me out in detail, wearing a slightly hungry expression.
“Well, we’re lucky,” Yunjin said, “None got on the couch.” She stood up and Karina and I looked away from each other.
“A food fight, tsk tsk tsk, Totally childish, you guys” said Yunjin.
“You started it,” Karina said, “But it was fun! I haven’t had a food fight before, and… naked Infront of people”
“Yes, I can cross that off my bucket list,” I said.
“You had ‘naked chocolate food fight with two girls’ on your bucket list?” asked Karina.
“Well, yeah. Every guy does.”
Karina shook her head and shared a look with Yunjin. “Men,” they said, shaking their heads.
“Okay,” said Yunjin. ‘Let’s get cleaned up.’ When she saw Karina and I glance at each other’s chocolate covered bodies, she added “and no, no one is using their tongue.”
“Awww,” Karina and I said in unison.
“Come on, Karina. We’ll show you the shower.”
“Can you turn that light off?” Karina asked.
“Oh, yes. Sorry.” Yunjin switched off the table lamp. Our night vision ruined, each of us were again only shadows.
“Thanks,” said Karina. “I’m still getting used to this nudity thing. It does help to keep the lights off.”
“Well,” I said, “we’re not going to find the bathroom without some light.” I lit a candle and held in front of me as I led the way to Yunjin’s bathroom.
Yunjin started the shower while I set the candle on the counter. While Yunjin adjusted the water, I noticed Karina looking at me again, a wistful expression on her face. She was fingering her gold chain.
“Okay, Karina. Go on in.” Yunjin said.
Karina got a mischievous look. “Let’s shower together.”
“Are you serious?”
“Come on! We’ve already seen each other. It’ll be quicker.” Karina grabbed my hand and tugged me into the shower behind her.
“Hang on,” Yunjin said from the other side of the shower curtain, “I have to get towels.”
Karina stood under the shower, water streaming down her lovely body in the dim candle light. She pulled me close and looked up at me with a serious expression.
“Hi,” she said. It was almost a whisper.
“Uh, hi, Karina,” I said, unsure of what she was doing.
Yunjin stepped in behind us.
“Come get wet you two,” said Karina.
Three people in the apartment’s little bathtub shower was a tight fit. It took some awkward maneuver for each of us to take turns under the water. I was standing under the spray, soaping Yunjin’s firm breasts as Karina soaped her back. I reached lower and ran my soapy fingers between Yunjin’s legs. She squirmed a little, and then forced my hand away, shaking her head as she glanced back towards Karina.
“We don’t want her to feel uncomfortable,” she whispered.
I spun us around until Yunjin was under the spray, my back to Karina. Yunjin soaped up my chest while Karina began cleaning my back. Yunjin briefly ran her hand over my dick, trying not to excite me. Behind, Karina pressed her breasts against my back and started kneading my ass.
“No fair, guys,” Karina complained. “No one is cleaning me.”
So I traded places with Karina, putting her between Yunjin and me. I looked towards Yunjin to see if it was okay, but she was busy washing her best friend’s back. Karina grabbed my hands and placed them right on her breasts. She gave a deep sigh then just stood there as I slid my soapy hands all over them, feeling their firmness, their weight, her warmth. Karina eyes never once left mine.
Behind her, Yunjin said, “Okay, I’m clean. Karina, I’ll get out so you can rinse off. She stepped out the curtain. Karina backed herself under the water, pulling me with her. Suddenly she reached up and pulled me into a deep kiss. Surprised, I hugged her but then pulled back. She looked at me, her eyes searching mine.
I glanced towards the closed shower curtain and whispered, “Karina, what are you doing?”
She took a deep breath and said “I… I don’t know.” She hugged me and rested her head against my chest. Then she released me, rinsed off quickly and stepped out.
I was more than half-hard now, so I turned the shower on full cold and willed my dick to relax. When I stepped out, both girls were almost dry. Yunjin handed me a towel. She looked down and noticed that I was still a little excited. Again, she shook her head in warning, indicating Karina behind her who was bending over toweling off her hair.
Back in the living room, we sat and drank more wine to the light of a candle. Instead of sitting beside me on the couch, this time Karina chose to sit in the chair opposite us. Was she upset by our experience in the shower? I couldn’t tell.
“So this is what two do when you’re together,” said Karina.
“Well, usually by this time we’re in bed.” Yunjin said, then she covered her mouth when she realized what she had said.
“Oops. Sorry.”
Karina shook her head. “It’s so amazing to hear you talk like that, Yunjin. It’s amazing you’re actually… you know,”
Yunjin snorted. “What?”
“Well, you didn’t like it when I said you were fucking each other’s brains out.”
Yunjin shook her head in disapproval.
“See? Anyway, I’m happy for you. You’ve held yourself back way too long.”
“Thanks, Karina. I’m getting used to it. It’s all been pretty wonderful.”
“So you’ve been telling me — In great detail.”
“Yunjin, you don’t actually have to tell Karina everything, you know. I’d like to think we maybe have a few secrets.” I said.
“Oh we do, I still haven’t told her you started to… oh, never mind.”
“Started to…?” Karina asked.
Yunjin looked down sheepishly and said, “Uh, you know. Use his mouth. Down there.”
“Holy shit, Yunjin, Some things you can keep private, you know.” I said.
“Well, let’s see. You run around naked every chance you get; she likes giving you blowjobs because of how cute you look when you come. Doggy style is your favorite position, girl on top is hers, but she won’t do anal. And now you’re eating her out. Did I miss anything?” Karina said.
Yunjin’s mouth hung open, mortified.
“You like it?” Karina asked.
“What?”
“When he uses his mouth — Down there.”
“Uh, well. It’s actually pretty fantastic. He makes me come every time.”
Karina looked surprised. “Bullshit. Not every time.”
“Well, yes. So far.”
Karina sighed. “Wow. No guy has ever made me come.”
Yunjin exclaimed “But you’ve been with lots of guys.”
Karina wrinkled her nose. “Not ‘lots’. But most have been too interested in getting themselves off to bother much with me.”
“But fucking, er, I mean…”
“That never does it for me.”
“Oh it does for me.” said Yunjin. “Not every time, of course, but often enough.”
“But him eating you out does every time? So come on, tell me. What does he do, exactly? Guys have done that to me and it’s just been kind of… meh.”
“Uh, ladies, come on now…”
Ignoring me, Yunjin said, “Well, I don’t really know. It’s not like I take notes. He just… does things. Lots of things. And then I’m gone.”
Karina turned to me, “So? What’s the secret? How can you make her come every time?”
I sighed. “Clearly there aren’t going to be any secrets with you two. So, okay. How can I explain something like that? I guess I just try to figure out what she likes best. Then I tease a little… you know, get her close, make her want it, take my time.”
“And you like doing it?”
“Oh yeah.” I looked at Yunjin. “I could come just watching Yunjin when she gets excited.”
Yunjin kissed me on the cheek, eyes gleaming in the candlelight.
Yunjin thought for a moment. She leaned against me then whispered, “We could show her, you know.”
“Huh?”
“Show her. You can’t tell her what you do. So maybe can she just… see for herself?”
“Okay, no more wine for you, Yunjin.”
“What? She’s already seen us naked, and we’ve already done some crazy things tonight. She’s my best friend.” She turned to Karina, “We could show you, then maybe you could teach the next guy you’re with.”
Karina sat, mouth half open. But clearly she was interested. She looked at me and blinked. “Uh, sure. So, uh, you mean make a video or something?”
I looked at Yunjin. She was looking at me with excited eyes.
“No,” she said. “Who would hold the camera? I mean, he could just do it with me and you could, uh, you know… watch?”
“Yunjin,” I said, “I think you might just want to show off for your friend. Or you’ve discovered a voyeuristic side. Let’s not do anything you’ll regret later.”
“It’s just us here,” she said. She pulled me close and whispered in my ear, “and I’m so horny. So, either we kick Karina out right now, or in three seconds she’s going to watch me fuck you right on this couch.”
I whispered back, “But that’s not what you want her to see, is it?” Yunjin just looked at me, breathing with excitement.
I sighed, then stood and pulled Yunjin to her feet. “Karina, we’re going to the bedroom. I think Yunjin wants you to follow.”
“And you?” said Karina. “Would you be okay with that?”
“I don’t even know. It’s not like we’ve ever done anything even remotely like this. But I’ll do anything for Yunjin if it makes her happy, and I guess it is just us after all. Guess we’ll just have to see.”
I led Yunjin down the dark hallway into her bedroom, leaving the door wide. We lit the candles we always kept in her room and stripped the covers off the bed. I hugged and kissed her deeply. She was breathing heavily and looking at me with longing.
Yunjin lay on the bed and spread her knees. I got on top of her and we embraced and kissed. When I reached down, I discovered she was already completely wet. She ran her hand lovingly over my cheek.
“Do it. Please. Eat me. Make me cum.”
I slid down between her legs. Yunjin’s delightful little pussy was glistening in the candlelight, Then I felt the bed shift and beautiful, naked Karina was right beside me. I was so enraptured with Yunjin I’d forgotten she was still with us. Karina looked up at Yunjin, and then looked at me.
Her tongue wet her lips. “Show me,” she whispered.
I reached out with two fingers and stroked down along the mound of Yunjin’s clit. Yunjin moaned and pushed her hips up off the bed. I stroked her with my thumb then lightly licked her clit with just the tip of my tongue. As always, Yunjin responded so beautifully, gasping, writhing, and trying to push my face into her as I teased, licked and massaged her clit. I kept at her for several minutes, playing, doing things I knew she loved, experimenting with other things to see how she would react, bringing her to the edge and trying to keep her there without going over.
Karina had her head propped on one elbow, watching me and occasionally looking up at Yunjin squirming and panting. When I paused to keep her from going over, Yunjin looked down and reached for Karina.
“It’s so good,” she breathed, squeezing her friend’s hand.
I went back to her. This time I inserted two fingers into her little opening and started finger fucking her as I gently sucked and tongued her clit. When I raked my thumb up along her asshole, Yunjin arched her back as her tunnel started squeezing my fingers rhythmically in orgasm.
“Huuuuh,” she groaned, mashing my head to her. She never let go of her friend’s hand while her breath caught, head flung back and body rigid in orgasm. I watched, enraptured, almost coming myself seeing my wonderful girl in such bliss.
When Yunjin regained her senses, she looked down and saw Karina and me looking back at her. She turned her head and covered her eyes in embarrassment.
“Oh God,” she said. “Don’t look at me.”
“That was beautiful,” said Karina, quietly. She squeezed Yunjin’s hand. “I’ve never seen anything like it.”
At this point I was hard and in need of relief. I didn’t care if her friend was there—I needed to fuck my Yunjin.
I slid up on top of her, my dick easily finding her opening by itself, and pushed into her warmth. Yunjin wrapped an arm around me, trapped me with her legs and welcomed me. I rutted and pushed as she clung, urging me on, her tight tunnel further fueling my hunger. I pulled her legs up, placing her knees against her ears and started fucking her even deeper. There was no thought or reason then, just a blind need to possess and satisfy my lust.
Yunjin gasped, moaned, and pushed her hips up against mine, urging me on. We fucked like bunny in heat, so in love, so in lust. Then finally, I pushed into her as deep as I could and with a growl, flooded her womb with cum, blast after blast. Yunjin ground against me and moaned, eagerly accepting all I could give her.
I collapsed onto her and tried to regain my senses. We kissed and hugged, laughing, caressing, staring into each other’s eyes.
Finally, I slipped out of her and rolled off onto my back, right onto Yunjin and Karina’s outstretched arms. The two had held hands the entire time I was fucking Yunjin.
I lifted and they pulled their arms out from under me. I glanced over at Karina. She looked happy, and… hungry. It was my turn to feel embarrassed.
“Sorry,” I said. “Letting you see that wasn’t part of the deal.”
Karina said nothing. She just caressed my cheek and pressed her body against mine as she reached an arm across and hugged Yunjin and me.
Yunjin lifted her head. Exhausted, she asked, “So, did you see?”
“I saw. oh, did I ever see. It’s like some porn movie with you guys.” She paused. “Actually, it’s nothing like porn. You’re so… loving. Tender. Except for that last part. I thought he was going to break you in half.”
The three of us lay in silence as the candles cast wavering shadows around the room. Karina clung to my side, arm across my chest, head on my shoulder, while absently pushing her hips against my leg. Yunjin cuddled against my other side.
Karina started to get up. “I’ll leave you love birds alone now.”
Yunjin reached over to grasp her arm. “Stay.”
“It’s okay, Yunjin. You guys need your alone time. Besides, if I don’t get out of here right now, I’m going to jump your boyfriend.”
Yunjin gave her friend a sympathetic look then pulled my face to hers. She studied my face for a moment then whispered, “Do it to her.”
“What?” I whispered back. “Fuck your friend?”
“Lick her. She said no guy has ever made her come. You could do it… I know you could. And I know you like her.”
Yunjin seemed serious, but I said, “That’s going way too far.”
“Why? She likes you too, you know. A lot. I see it. But it’s okay. She’s my best friend.”
I still couldn’t tell if Yunjin really meant what she was saying. So I decided to test her.
I turned to face Karina. Then I looked down at her pussy, back up to her face and licked my lips, giving her a pleading, hopeful look like a puppy who’d eyed a forbidden meal.
Karina chucked. “Oh for fuck’s sake,” she laughed. Then, “No way. You can’t be serious.” She looked past me to Yunjin.
Yunjin was still holding Karina’s arm. “It’s okay,” she said.
“Let him really show you. Make you come.”
Karina looked back to me and saw my expression. I wanted to… I really am, especially now that it was clear that Yunjin was okay with it.
I stroked Karina’s cheek lovingly. She blinked, and then closed her eyes, pushing her face against my hand. After a long pause, she took a breath and lay back on the bed, pushing my head down.
“Go. Do it. But it won’t work.”
I could not believe what was happening. I slid down and positioned myself between Karina’s legs but it felt surreal. I fully expected Karina or Yunjin to change their minds at any moment. But Yunjin propped herself up to watch, her excitement visible, then nodded encouragement.
Karina was looking down at me too, mouth half-open, eyes filled with anticipation. I decided then I would try to make her come harder than she had ever come in her life.
Karina’s pussy was exquisite, a work of art. From her trimmed patch of hair to her shape, so different from Yunjin. It was a beautiful sight, and the scent of her arousal excited me even more.
I started gently with just fingers and the palm of my hand, teasing, massaging, exploring. Karina gave little gasps and moans, her hips rising and falling.
Karina sighed, “Okay. Okay. That’s… nice. Oh… oh shit. Good. That’s… ohmygod, yes do that. That’s… hunngh…” She stroked my hair and tilted her hips to give me better access as her ability to speak faded.
I started exploring and playing with determination, trying different things, trying to get a sense of what she liked best. But everything seemed to drive Karina on. She was gasping and puffing and groaning, trying to mash my face into her. I kept at her, teasing at first, then diving in insistently.
Glancing up, I saw and Yunjin right beside her, watching her friend’s face and holding her hand while Karina, eyes closed, grimaced, gasped, sighed and moaned.
I had always been able to read Yunjin’s reactions well, but Karina was like unexplored territory. I played and teased, trying things I knew Yunjin loved, trying other things just to see Karina’s reactions. When I slid two fingers inside her and curled my fingers to massage her g-spot, within minutes Karina surprised me when she froze, lifting her hips. She came with a strangled grunt, her inner walls squeezing rhythmically as she pushed my face hard into her with one hand and gripped Yunjin’s with the other. Her breathing paused as her head flung back and she writhed and arched.
I held on until Karina let out an explosive breath and her body grew limp.
When I extracted my face from between her thighs and looked up, Karina and Yunjin were looking at me — Yunjin bright-eyed and proud, Karina looking like she had run a marathon. What a rewarding sight. I lay my head on Karina’s toned tummy, staring up as her breathing was back to normal.
Then I slide lower to start on her again. Karina gasped when I licked her pussy to her clit then worked her to orgasm twice more in rapid succession. Finally, she pushed me away.
“Enough. Oh my god, stop. You’re going to kill me.”
I wiped my mouth and slid up between the two girls.
Yunjin was beaming. “That was amazing,” she said.
Karina was panting, her skin flushed and her eyes glassy. One hand toyed absently with a breast. I was rock hard, of course, and Yunjin noticed my distress. But when I indicated that I wanted to fuck her again, Yunjin pushed me towards her friend.
“Go ahead,” she whispered. “She needs that too.”
I was beyond arguing the merits of what we were doing. I rolled over onto Karina’s side.
She opened her eyes and looked at me quizzically.
“Hi,” I said. “So, was that a little better than doing it yourself?”
Karina said nothing. She just grabbed my head and kissed me. I kissed her back, stroking her hair, her face, her tits, and then her pussy lips. While we kissed, I worked myself halfway on top of her. Karina then opened her legs, I settled between them, kissing and stroking her the entire time.
Despite having come in Yunjin not long ago, I was beyond hard. I was hesitant to fuck Karina but then I felt Yunjin’s hand grasp my cock and slide me up and down her best friend’s slit then position me at Karina entrance.
Karina pushed my head away from hers and said, “Uh hey, you guys? Listen…”
Yunjin whispered in my ear, “Push.”
“Huuuhh…” Karina arched her back and spread her legs, taking me halfway inside her. I withdrew, then on the next stroke seated myself in her all the way. Karina pushed back on my chest, her mouth open and eyes wide, gurgling incoherently. I pulled out then pushed myself into her again.
“Uuuh! God!” Karina breathed. She looked at me in wide-eyed wonder then wrapped her arms around my neck. Her eyes narrowed into a needful expression then she lay back and whispered, “Oh, fuck it. Fuck me. Just… fuck me.”
Karina was tighter than Yunjin, and felt different in many other little ways. Her pussy resisted more each time I pushed in, and clung tighter when withdrew. I buried myself in her all the way and held myself there, Karina squeezed her inner muscles like she wanted to trap my cock there, nice and nestled in her depths. Then she pushed her hips back, drawing me deeper into her.
I fucked her urgently, insistently, hungrily. I tried to control the animal part of my brain, wanting it to last. That such a beautiful, delightful woman was letting me fuck her was mind-blowing. That she was Yunjin’s best friend, and I was fucking her with Yunjin’s permission was beyond incredible.
We kept at it, hard and soft, gently fornicating then giving into primal desire and rutting like starved beasts. We kissed, we embraced, we looked into each other’s eyes. Was Yunjin jealous? No. She held Karina’s hand throughout, sometimes stroking my cheek or back as I fucked her best friend. I let go of worry and focused completely on Karina’s.
Soon Karina’s movements became more desperate. I fucked her steadily, sometimes pulling out completely then pushing back and forth just inside her opening before sliding in deep. Then Karina inhaled a short gasp, wriggled against me hard and froze, clamping onto my dick as she came once more. I rammed into her once, twice, then was consumed by an eye-rolling, ball-draining orgasm, flooding the gorgeous, needful woman with everything I had left.
I stayed on top of Karina, weakened by the intensity of my orgasm, stroking her face and hair, giving her light kisses as we recovered. Then I slid over onto the bed between the girls, exhausted.
Yunjin snuggled to my side and kissed my cheek. “Thank you,” she whispered. “She really needed that.”
We rested for a while then I needed to get up to get us all water and find the bathroom. When I slid off the bed and got to my feet, I was treated to a memorable sight: my Yunjin and her very best friend flat on their backs, legs spread slightly, their pussies both leaking my cum.
During the night I woke when Yunjin climbed on top of me. The candles must have burned down — it was completely dark. I was already rock hard. My sly girl had to have been playing with me while I slept. She lined me up with her opening and slid down carefully until she fully impaled herself on my cock. She felt tighter than usual and was very wet. Yunjin let out a heavy moan of satisfaction and started riding me — her favorite position. I reached up to massage her breasts as she used me for her pleasure. They were warm, firm and way, way too large. It wasn’t Yunjin. It was Karina.
Karina slid her herself up and down, back and forth, milking my cock, taking her time. I massaged her incredible breasts, resigned to let her do what she needed. In the utter darkness, it was impossible to tell how long we went at it, but near the end I grabbed her waist and rolled Karina onto her back to take her hard. She held me tight, gasping and rutting as I fucked her until once again, I pumped her full of cum. We kissed tenderly until exhaustion overtook me.
I rolled off Karina and lay between the two girls. I held Karina’s hand and reached over to rest my other hand on Yunjin’s sleeping form. In the morning we would need to come to terms with what we had done. But there in the middle of the night, the three of us lay together as friends and lovers and, for that moment at least, we were content.
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“Hon, wake up. Karina’s gone.”
Yunjin awoke and stretched, the bed sheet falling to expose her lovely breast.
“Uh? Gone? Where’d she go?”
“She was gone when I woke up.”
Yunjin yawned, trying to clear her head. Then she covered her eyes and groaned.
“Oh no. What did we do?”
I touched her arm. “We got a little carried away.”
“I’ll say. Letting you sleep with my best friend, letting her watch us… what were we thinking?”
Yunjin groaned again. “And she left? That’s bad. She’s probably so embarrassed.”
“Somehow I don’t think Karina gets embarrassed that easily.”
“Oh, you don’t know her. We’ve been friends forever. She’s outgoing, but she’s no slut.”
“I didn’t mean she was. We all just got… carried away, like you said. So should we talk to her?”
“It’s better if I talk to her first. Alone.”
“If you say so, but Yunjin, how are you feeling about it?”
Yunjin stared at the ceiling. “I don’t know. I should be horrified, right? But I think I’m okay. I never thought we’d ever do anything like that, but it went so naturally. It seemed right.”
“I thought you’d need a lot more time to think about what we did.”
“I thought about it last night… after you and Karina fucked the second time.”
“You were awake? Uh, I was going to tell you about that…”
“I know. You screwed her a second time.”
“Actually, it was more like she screwed me. When I woke up Karina was already on top of me.”
“And I bet you fought really hard to push her off too,” said Yunjin, nudging me.
“I… at first I thought it was you! Honestly. I couldn’t see anything, and you wake me up like that often enough.”
“You thought it was me? Oh, that’s so sweet! But then you realized it was Karina and…”
“…and I couldn’t stop her. I… to be honest, didn’t really want to, either. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to be sorry. I mean, I practically pushed you on her the first time. I think that means you had permission last night.”
“So you just lay there and let us do it?”
“Uh huh. Pretty hard to sleep with you two shaking the bed grunting, moaning. And well… it turned me on.”
“Oh, did it?”
Yunjin blushed. “Yeah. Don’t know why, but the thought of you making Karina feel as good as you make me feel… it’s exciting. And last night was special. She hadn’t been with anyone for so long. And she has a little crush on you, you know. I’m glad we made her happy.”
“Happy is not exactly the word I’d use. So, what does this mean?”
“What?”
“I mean, you’re okay with me sleeping with other women now? I can hit the bars and sleep with anyone I want?”
Yunjin wrinkled her nose. “Gross! No, of course not.”
“Then what, Yunjin?”
She considered. “Well, Karina’s my best friend. You’re my boyfriend. Last night was just between us.”
“So, if I slept with anyone else…”
“I’d cut your dicks off and leave you to bleed out...”
“Yunjin!”
“I’m not sharing you with just anyone. You’re the only good guy I’ve ever found. But Karina… well, we’ve always told each other everything, shared everything.” She paused. “Last night we just went too far. But it’s not like it will ever happen again. She just needed some attention.”
“I think I get it,” I said. “But look, I’ve got this good friend who’s always wanted to screw you…”
Yunjin gasped. “I’m not sleeping with any of your friends!”
“Good. And I don’t want you to. So we’re clear: you were okay ‘sharing’ me with your best friend, but I’m not okay sharing you at all. You’re mine, okay?”
“Okay,” said Yunjin, and kissed me. “I want to be yours. I don’t need anyone else. Besides, it was just one night. Oh! I’d better call her.”
Yunjin found her phone. “She’s not answering. And she’s offline. Oh! We slept in. I’ll be late for yoga. I’ll talk to Karina there.”
“You never told me Karina was in your yoga class.”
“It took a lot of persuading, but I got her to sign up. Look, why don’t you go home? Clean up, get a change of clothes. Can you come back later for dinner?”
I hugged her. “Of course. It’s Saturday. Where else would I be but with you?”
As I walked to my apartment building, my thoughts were on Karina. The first time I saw her, I wanted her, but she had that effect on everyone; a beauty with almost supermodel looks. Someone like her could never be interested in an ordinary guy like me. My quiet world would bore her to death.
How wrong I was. Karina admitted she would have given me a chance; Even I could hardly believe it. She seemed to have developed a thing for me since Yunjin had been telling her everything we did. Images from last night filled my head: Karina getting naked with us, showering with us, watching me with Yunjin, letting me eat her and fuck her… it was all I could think about.
When I walked into the lobby of my apartment, Karina was waiting.
“Uh, hi, What’s up? How did you know where I live?”
“Yunjin’s pointed out your building to me once. And your name’s on the directory. Can we talk?”
We rode the elevator in silence. Karina avoided my eyes.
“Apologize for the mess,” I said, Letting her inside.
“Guys are all alike. You all need a maid. Or a mother.”
“Karina, have you talked to Yunjin? You just disappeared this morning. She’s worried. She was going to meet you at yoga.”
“Oh, yoga. I forgot. Why do I let her talk me into those things?” Karina looked at her phone. “Yeah, she’s left, like, a million messages.” She started sifting through the texts and voice mail.
“Look, call her. She’s probably not at her class yet. I need to grab a shower… I still haven’t cleaned up from last night. Make yourself at home.”
Karina nodded as she thumbed Yunjin’s number.
In the shower, I tried to think. What was Karina doing here? Why did she just leave Yunjin’s place without a goodbye? While I was deep in thought, The shower curtain opened and a very naked Karina stepped inside.
“Karina! What the hell?”
She put her arms around me. “Yunjin didn’t answer. I haven’t had time to clean up either. Wash my back?” She smiled mischievously.
Last night, the shower with Yunjin and Karina was playful and erotic. This time it was just awkward. I soaped her up, unsure and hesitant. I admired every inch of her body as she closed her eyes to rinse.
Karina cleaned me and spent a few moments fondling me with soapy hands while she watched my face. My body couldn’t react. It felt… wrong.
We dried off, but when I went to find clothes, Karina stopped me.
“Can we just stay naked for now? I really liked it last night, Like you said, it makes being open a lot easier, somehow.”
“Uh, sure, Karina. You know I’m comfortable with it. If you are.”
Naked, she led me back to the living room and We sat on the couch.
“So, anyway, about last night…”
I interrupted. “Yunjin said says she’s fine with everything that happened.”
“Are you sure? I was certain she’d gonna need a therapy.”
“Yeah, I was worried too. But she doesn’t freak out about sex anymore. She said last night was a special thing, just between the three of us.”
“She’s come a long way. You really saved her, you know.”
“Yunjin saved herself. I just let her be who she needed to be, without judgment. And maybe encouraged her a little.”
Karina hugged me and looked into my eyes. Her expression was strange. Scared. To break the awkwardness, I asked, “So how do you feel about last nights? Don’t tell me you’ve never done a threesome before.”
“No, that was a first for me.”
“Why did you leave?”
Karina was silent, “When I woke up you two were all cuddled up together. I felt awkward, and I wasn’t sure whether Yunjin would freak out. So, I slipped out.” She said.
“So, no regrets?”
“Uh, I dunno. Maybe.” She paused. “I’m not on the pill.”
“What? Why don’t you tell me that?”
“I haven’t had a steady guy for a while. So I stopped taking it. It gives me trouble.”
“But last night… I came in you. Twice!”
“I know! I tried to say something… tried to stop you, but then you were in me and it had been so long. You were so good, and it was so hot… doing it with Yunjin like that. With her boyfriend. I planned to just let you do it for a while then get you to pull out, but when we really got going, well, I wasn’t exactly thinking. Later, I woke up and you were all naked and warm beside me and… well, you know. I don’t think I was even fully awake that second time.”
I shook my head in disbelief. “You should have said something. I could have stopped. But, I wasn’t thinking clearly either. When you let me… well, it was a dream come true.”
“Seriously?”
“I’ve been fantasized about you. But last night, I never asked you if it was okay… you know… to come in you. I should have made sure. I shouldn’t have assumed. I’m sorry.”
Karina rested her head against my shoulder.
“Anyway, shouldn’t we find a drugstore?”
“That Plan B or whatever?” said Karina. “That’s the thing. I can’t. I took it once, and it made me sick as hell. The doctor said that might be why I always had such trouble with the pill. The same stuff is in both, only more.”
“Oh. Well, it’s probably okay. When Yunjin and I did it when we were camping it turned out okay. It was just the right time in her cycle. We got lucky.”
We used my phone to find an ovulation calculator and entered Karina’s details.
“Oh, damn it, If this is right, I’m ovulating today. The worst possible time. Guess that’s why I was so horny, huh?”
“It’ll be all right.” I said, unsure what to say.
“Bullshit! I can’t have a kid. I can barely take care of myself. And my job…”
“It was both our fault. You’re not alone. If it happens, and whatever you decide, Karina, I’m with you, okay?”
She looked at me with derision. “You’re going to ‘do the honourable thing’? A woman can take care of herself, you know.”
“Of course. I just, I mean, I’m not going to take off on you. I’ll do everything I can.” I smiled, “You know… paint the baby’s room, fetch you pickles and ice cream, feed you ice chips during the delivery…”
Karina gasped and shoved me away but she smiled a little.
“You total asshole! That’s not funny!”
“I’m serious, though. I’m with you through this. We have to tell Yunjin.”
“No way. If she finds out I fucked you without protection, she’ll kill me then she’ll kills herself. You know how she is. She doesn’t need to worry along with us.”
“It’s not right to keep this from her. But yeah… it would completely stress her out. I guess we can wait until, we’re sure.”
Karina hugged me for a long time. She pulled back to look at me with damp eyes. “It would be better if you were an asshole, you know. Then I could get mad. I meet the only good guy in the entire city, and I give him away to Yunjin.”
“That’s nice of you to say, but let’s be real. I’m nothing much. I’m not rich, and only slightly handsome…”
Karina made a face.
“…so what’s the big deal? You’re gorgeous. You can have any guy you want.”
“Yeah, and you know how well that’s worked out for me. Yunjin told me everything you’ve done for her. I mean, she’s so happy now that she’s with you! It’s hard not to be jealous.” Karina leaned in and kissed me. “You transformed her, you know. Maybe you could transform me.”
“If you’re pregnant, you’ll be transformed all right.”
Karina pulled me close, her warm breasts pressing into me. “So, you fantasized about me, huh?”
“Uh, of course, Karina. You’re beautiful. Fun. A little wild. You’re completely sexy. You know that.”
“I really liked last night, you know. Being with you. And I don’t think I’ve ever cum so hard in my life. Or so many times.”
Karina guided my hand to her breast and kissed me. Soon we were running our hands over each other, and she pulled me down until I was lying on her on the couch. She spread her legs and I could feel her wet folds against my dick.
“Fuck me again,” she said, an eager, hopeful look in her eyes.
“Fuck me hard. Just don’t cum in me, okay?”
She was so brazen, so sexy. My heart was pounding at the thought of taking her again. Yunjin would be disappointed she wasn’t there to watch us, I thought. It got her so hot the previous night. Maybe I should call her so she can come over.
Karina reached down to guide my cock, but I was soft. She stroked it a few times and rubbed my cock along her wet slit, but there was no response. Even I couldn’t believe it. Karina, alone in my apartment, eager for me to fuck her and I wasn’t hard?
“Did we wear you out last night?” Karina asked with a wry smile
I rolled off her. “No. Just give me a minute.”
Karina scooted down and began to lick my cock, all around the head and occasionally sucking into her mouth, all while keeping an eye contact. She alternated between stroking my soft member, licking the head then caressing my balls.
That should have been more than enough. The sight of her working away, looking up with that mischievous expression, eager to get me hard should have caused a powerful reaction. Instead — nothing.
It occurred to me then, that maybe, Yunjin wouldn’t be okay with what we were doing right now. I stroked Karina’s head and pushed her off me.
“Karina, Let’s just stop this.”
Frustrated, she went back to working on my cock. She was skilled and knew all the tricks that would normally get any man hard in minutes, but it wasn’t working.
She stopped and rested her head on my thigh.
“Didn’t that feel good?”
“It felt wonderful, but I don’t know… this doesn’t seem right.”
Karina was quiet for a moment.
“Were you thinking of Yunjin just now?”
“Well, sure. Not just now, I always think of Yunjin.”
Karina considered that. “Always think of her, huh?”
We sat up.
“I wonder,” she said, idly reaching over to fondle me. “Did you ever consider you’re in love?”
“Huh? I like you, Karina, but I don’t know you well enough for that.”
“Oh, for f…” She whacked my head. “Guys are so clueless. Not with me! With Yunjin.”
“What? I mean, Yunjin’s wonderful, but it’s way too soon for anything like that… isn’t it?”
“Is it? I’ve seen how you two are together. Picture this: what if Yunjin was here right now, beside us like last night, naked, her hand guiding you into me, asking you to fuck me, and holding my hand while she watched us fuck each other like animals?”
More images from last night returned. It was so exciting having Yunjin watch, not just accepting me fucking her best friend, but actively encouraging us. I started getting hard.
Karina noticed. “Ah… someone likes having threesomes with his girlfriend. So Naughty! So if she was here, you’d be fine. I think even if you just had her permission to be with me, you’d be okay. But you can’t go behind her back, can you? Because it might hurt her. And you can’t hurt someone you love.”
I thought about that. It was all new. I didn’t know the first thing about it, Love.
“We were so good together last night. We had a real connection, didn’t we? I came here thinking that maybe you might like to be with me instead of Yunjin. Especially if… you know, you’ve knocked me up.”
“Uh…”
Karina sighed. “I guess I was only thinking about myself again. I should have seen it… it’s obvious now.” She forced a smile. ‘You’re right. We can’t be doing this. I’m sorry for tempting you.’ She took a breath and stood. “I’d better get home. And you, big guy, need to get back to Yunjin. And tell her you love her. Because I’m pretty sure you do.”
As I sat there and thought for a while, Karina dressed. She kissed my cheek and let herself out.
It was getting dark when I returned to Yunjin’s apartment.
“Why are you dressed?” I said when I walked in.
“Hope you don’t mind, but I invited Karina over to eat with us again. I think we all should talk together.”
“Oh, so you… talked to her? What did she say?”
“Not much. She wasn’t at yoga, but I got hold of her later. She says she’s fine with what we did… she was more worried about me. But something’s wrong. I could hear it.”
So Karina had not told Yunjin about our afternoon together, or about her possibly being pregnant. I decided that even if Karina didn’t want to, we had to tell Yunjin.
When Karina arrived, she said, “What’s this? You’re not running around naked?”
“We don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
Karina grimaced. “Guys, it’s your place. You kids like prancing around in the buff, go ahead… it’s not like I didn’t see it all last night.”
“You sure?”
“Go ahead, guys. Besides, I’ve started to enjoy it.”
I looked at Yunjin and she shrugged, so I moved behind her. Kissing her neck, I pulled off her top, then kissed and nibbled her exposed shoulders. I held her breasts when I released her bra. Freeing her from her jeans, I stroked her tummy and squeezed her ass, then just wrapped my arms around her from behind, enjoying the feel of her. When it was her turn, Yunjin gave me a similar treatment undressing me.
When we were both naked, we glanced at Karina. She had a wistful expression.
“Oh wow, does he always undress you like that?” she said.
Yunjin stroked my cheek. “Most of the time. Sometimes I get dressed just so he can undress me again.”
“You… uh, is it all right if I get naked too?”
“If you’re okay with it, go ahead,” said Yunjin.
“Can… can he do it?”
I looked at Yunjin. She smirked and nodded.
I stepped behind Karina and began stripping her, kissing her shoulders and neck, slowly removing one thing at a time. When I crouched to lower her pants, I kissed her flat tummy that, for all we knew, held the beginnings of our child. The thought was frightening but exciting too.
When I stood up, Karina hugged me, resting her head on me. Her warm body and breasts caused me to stir.
We dimmed the lights and lit candles to make Karina more comfortable, and we sat, ate and chatted.
Karina seemed nervous, but I felt sick. I couldn’t stand it. Looking over at Karina I said “Yunjin, there might be a problem about last night…”
I told her about Karina’s visit that afternoon and the chance she might be pregnant. Yunjin listened in stony silence. When I finished, Yunjin fixed Karina with a cold stare.
“You let him fuck you without protection. Then went to see him. Behind my back. And tried to fuck him again?”
Karina looked stricken. “It wasn’t exactly like that… I wasn’t…” She trailed off, searching for a response.
The room seemed chilly as Yunjin glowered at her friend.
Karina said, “It was so good last night. There was a spark there… with him. I’m sure there was. I thought… look, I don’t know. When there’s magic with a guy, I go after him. You know me. I was excited. I didn’t even think about you. It was selfish, I know.”
Yunjin turned her attention to me. Her mouth was tight.
“And you? What the hell were you thinking?
“Yeah,” I said, “I guess I wasn’t. But we didn’t do anything.”
“You sure tried, said Yunjin. She paused, and then stood up, gathered my clothes and Karina’s into her arms in one big bundle, opened her apartment door and tossed it all into the hallway.
“Get out,” she said calmly.
“Yunjin, let’s talk about…”
“Both of you get the fuck out! NOW!”
Karina started crying and ran out to gather her clothes. Yunjin shoved me outside and slammed the door, bolting it behind us.
Karina knocked and tried the doorknob. “Yunjin! Come on!”
From behind the door, Yunjin yell, “Go away! Go fuck your new boyfriend.”
Karina and I scrambled to pull on our clothes. Luckily, none of Yunjin’s neighbors were around. I heard Yunjin crying and stomp to her bedroom.
We knocked and pleaded, but Yunjin ignored us.
Karina dried her eyes. “So, ‘new boyfriend’… your place or mine?”
We were devastated, we had hurt Yunjin. We needed a plan. My apartment was close, so we went there to think what to do. When I got in the door, I automatically stripped off my clothes, before it occurred to me to leave them on. Karina hesitated then stripped too. Oh well.
We sat beside each other, staring at the floor.
“I always fuck things up,” she sniffled. “What are we going to do?”
We talked, thinking how to apologize, how to undo the damage and regain Yunjin’s trust. I began to understand why threesomes in a serious relationship rarely worked.
Karina cried a little more so I held her. Her warm breasts against me felt wonderful as always.
“Can I stay with you tonight?”
I looked at her, incredulous. “You have got to be kidding.”
“Just to cuddle! That’s all. I don’t want to be alone after all this. Tomorrow we can go see Yunjin and patch things up.”
Sleeping with Karina in my own bed sounded wonderful. It also sounded like another betrayal. I doubted we could stop at cuddling. Before I could refuse, there was tapping at my door. Yunjin let herself in with the key I had given her weeks before.
“Returned to the scene of the crime, huh?” Yunjin said when she saw us together on the couch.
I went to her. “How’d you know we’d be here?”
“I know you. And I know Karina. Of course you’d go to your place to talk.”
“And that’s all we were doing, Yunjin.”
“I know. Is it okay if I join you?”
Yunjin stripped off her clothes and pulled us into a three-way hug.
“I’m sorry I blew up, guys,” she said. “That was childish.”
Karina’s eyes were damp. “I’m sorry too, I didn’t mean to…”
Yunjin shushed her and turned to me. “Can I borrow your bedroom? I need to yell at Karina in private for a while.”
“This involves me too, Yunjin.”
“I don’t blame you… as much. Just wait here, okay?”
Yunjin pulled Karina down the hall to my bedroom and closed the door. I figured it was best for them to have it out in private. They had been friends a long time, and I had confidence in Yunjin. Her parents had poisonous beliefs about sex, but to their credit, they also believed in forgiveness and practiced it. Yunjin had inherited that trait.
I listened to Yunjin yell at Karina from behind the bedroom door. That was followed by mutual sobs and then low murmurs. Finally, I heard a few giggles.
When all was quiet, I knocked on the door.
Yunjin stepped out. “It’s okay,” she whispered. “She’ll be okay.” Karina sat on the edge of the bed, huddled with arms crossed over her knees.
Yunjin and I returned to the living room.
“She’s okay?” I asked. “How are you, Yunjin?”
She shrugged and nodded. “Am I okay, she might have let my boyfriend impregnate her? No, I’m still a little pissed off about that. And you! What the hell were you thinking this afternoon?”
“Yeah, I feel terrible. At first, I was excited… like a continuation of last night. I thought how much you’d want to watch us, then it registered we shouldn’t have been doing anything without you. I’m sorry.”
Yunjin shook her head. “Guys… always thinking with their little head first.” She looked at me slyly and then said, “She told me you couldn’t get it up for her.”
“Oh, great,” I groaned.
“…because you were worried I’d be hurt.” She pecked my cheek. “Still, don’t ever do that again.”
I nodded and hugged her tight. Yunjin was a wonder. A weaker woman would have thrown me and Karina out and never talked to us again.
“So, are you and Karina okay now?”
“I’m not happy, but I can forgive her.”
“Seriously?”
She sighed. “Well, we can’t blame her for last night, can we? I mean, I urged you on her. Even put your dick inside her. I was so excited, I didn’t even ask if it was okay. She should have stopped us, but I remember the first time we went camping. We were just as weak then as she was last night.”
I forced a smile.
Yunjin took my hand. “Listen… Karina’s parent split up when she was little. It was ugly, and life for her was… chaotic… for a long time. Her mom moved a lot. Lots of money problems. I think that’s part of why she keeps running off with rich guys. She wants to be secure, not have to worry.”
“I had no idea.”
“So, she gets a little needy. But that’s fine. I like being there for her. And she’s always been there for me. Always. But right now, she’s terrified to wind up a single mother like her mom — struggling and alone.”
“She won’t be alone,” I said. “She has us.”
Yunjin’s eyes searched mine. “Us?”
“Well, of course. We’ll be there for her… we’ll deal with this together, right?”
“So, you… you wouldn’t want to just be with Karina?”
“What? Yunjin, I’m not going to leave you.”
Yunjin’s eyes became misty. “I’m happy to hear that.”
“I can’t leave you. You’re everything to me.” I paused. “Though Karina does have bigger boobs.”
Yunjin pushed me away, only to see my grin. “You’re a dick,” she smiled.
I pretended to think about it more. “Hmm… no, it could never work without you. I’d need you to change diapers. I wouldn’t be able to handle that at all.”
When Karina walked into the living room, Yunjin was hitting me hard with a cushion.
“No, that’s not how you do it. You need something hard. Let me get a frying pan or a baseball bat. We can take turns.” Karina said.
While fending off Yunjin’s blows, I saw Karina’s eyes were red but otherwise she looked okay. Better than okay, since she was still naked. If Karina would be hanging around us, I would have to curb my habit of gawking whenever I saw her without clothes.
“So,” said Karina, “when Yunjin’s done beating you, got any dessert? I could use a sugar rush right now. But if it’s chocolate fondue again, I’m leaving.”
All we had were cookies, the cheap crumbly ones you get in a bag from the store. The three of us sat beside each other on the couch and talked.
I offered to clean up crumbs that had fallen on Karina’s boobs, and she sweetly informed me where she’d stuff her cookie if I tried. Yunjin found that particularly funny.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this again.” Yunjin said.
“Doing what?”
“Sitting here naked, joking around.”
Karina nodded. “It’s nice. But feel free to leave if you have somewhere to go. Your boyfriend owes me a good fucking after leaving me all hot and bothered this afternoon.”
Yunjin’s face was the picture of shock.
“God, I’m kidding! After what we’ve been through, if he brings his dick near me again, I’ll cut it off.”
“Yeah?” I said, “Well, you keep that ravenous pussy of yours away from me or I’ll staple it shut.”
Once we stopped laughing, Karina said, “Oh! Yunjin, speaking of getting knocked up, I saw… you know, Mr. Nice Guy. He drove past me on my way to your place. I don’t think he saw me, though.”
“Mr. Nice Guy?” I asked.
“Oh, yeah!” said Yunjin, “Tell him about that guy!”
Karina sat back and said, “I went out with him a couple years ago. He was pretty rich. Great car, great condo, great hair, shitty taste in clothes. I should have known from the start that he was just another asshole looking for arm candy.”
“C’mon, tell him!” Yunjin said.
“He flew me to Paris,” said Karina.
“Really?” I said. “I guess he WAS rich.”
“Well, it wasn’t a private jet, but still. For a long weekend. Of course, I’d never been there, so I was like a little girl taking it all in. We stayed at a fancy hotel, walked around, saw the Louvre, Napoleon’s tomb, all that stuff. Then at night, we walked to the Eiffel tower. It was all lit up. Just incredible.”
“And…” prompted Yunjin.
“Oh, well in Paris people are making out everywhere. At the cafes, kissing on the street, everywhere. There’s a big park on the way to the Tower. While we were walking through it, couples were screwing on the park benches.”
“No way.”
“Yes! One couple, the girl was sitting in the guy’s lap, facing him. She was wearing a skirt, so they weren’t naked or anything, but it was obvious what was happening. We walked right by them on the path.”
“The City of Love, huh?” I said.
“Another couple was even more obvious. She was bent over the bench; he was behind. Even with just the streetlamps, it wasn’t subtle. Mr. Nice Guy told me in France it’s normal for everyone to have a lover. You’re married, and it’s just accepted you’ll also have someone on the side. Part of the culture I guess, don’t know if that’s really true.”
Beside me, Yunjin was squirming a little. Was this getting her turned on?
“I need to move to Paris,” I said. I expected a slap in the arm from Yunjin, but she looked lost in Karina’s story.
I could see Yunjin was really squirming and breathing hard, her chest flushed and breasts rising and falling. That gave me an idea. I whispered to Karina, then stood up and took some plates back to the kitchen.
When I came back, Karina had stood and moved behind the couch. We exchanged a look then she grabbed Yunjin’s wrists, pulling her arms up behind her head.
“Hey!” exclaimed Yunjin.
Karina held Yunjin’s arms tightly and twisted, forcing her to turn until she faced backwards on the couch towards Karina, knees on the seat. Yunjin’s lovely ass and wide hips looked delicious as I approached from behind.
I crouched over her and whispered, “Did that story turn you on? Would you like to be the one fucked across a park bench while people walk by?” I fondled one of her hanging breast and toyed with her pussy. Yunjin was soaked.
Yunjin hesitated then whispered, “Yes.”
I was hard by now. I said, “One day I’ll do that to you. But for now…”
I buried my dick in her with one slow stroke.
“Aaaahh,” Yunjin moaned, lifting her head and arching her back to receive my cock. Karina held her tightly to the couch and grinned at me.
I grasped Yunjin’s hips and started fucking her slowly. Each time I bottomed out, Yunjin grunted and pushed her ass back. She rested her head on the back of the couch and held on to her friend as I fuck her.
Soon I was fucking Yunjin steadily, losing myself in the sensations of her warm, tight pussy, the sight of her shapely ass and back, and the sound of her little gasps and grunts of pleasure. Each time I pressed forward it also caused Karina’s large breasts to sway a little as she eagerly watched us fuck.
Soon Yunjin so lost in lust that Karina released her arms. Yunjin held the back of the couch in languid submission, letting herself to be taken.
I was so immersed with Yunjin that I didn’t notice Karina moving to join her friend on the couch. She got on her knees beside Yunjin then waggled her ass, looking back at me with raised eyebrows.
I pulled myself from Yunjin. She raised her head as she felt me withdraw, awareness returning from her lust-induced stupor enough to realize her best friend was now beside her. I tentatively positioned myself behind Karina and looked at Yunjin expectantly.
She nodded. “Just be careful.”
Karina smiled then pushed her ass back, sinking me into her tight pussy halfway. I gripped her hips and drove the rest of the way in myself.
“No problem getting hard now, is there big guy?” she breathed, eyes lidded.
I took Karina firmly, holding her hips, and, despite the risk, tried to get as deep inside as possible. Yunjin kept her position, watching us, breathing with excitement. I loved how much it turned her on.
When I felt the urge to come rising, I pulled out and pushed back into Yunjin, fucking her again with determined, forceful strokes.
I alternated between Yunjin and Karina several times, careful to withdraw from Karina each time the need to come rose. In the end, I was fucking Karina with abandon as she huffed and grunted, pushing her ass back to match my strokes. When I reach under her to tantalize her clit with two fingers across her clit, she stiffened, and in a few moments gave a short gasp, and she came.
I stayed inside her as long as I dared, then pulled out to plunge balls-deep into Yunjin.
“Ah… God!” she exclaimed. I gave her several more strokes before unloading into her welcoming pussy.
I stayed mated to Yunjin, savoring the afterglow and the sight of the women presented before me. I leaned over to kiss Karina’s shoulder and cup one of her breast, and then did the same to Yunjin.
The girls turned around, and I sat between them, hugging them to my sides.
“I didn’t think we’d do this again,” said Yunjin, resting her head on my shoulder. “Is this going to be a regular thing?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “What if it is?”
Yunjin looked over at her friend. “Karina, are you okay?”
Karina was flushed and a little out of breath. “I have no complaints if you don’t.”
We talked a little longer until I yawned, causing the girls to yawn too. It was nearly midnight.
Yunjin stood and stretched, her body lovely in the candlelight. “I need to get home. Some people kept me up really late last night.”
Karina looked uncertain. I didn’t want her to leave, and a glance at Yunjin told me she didn’t either.
“Karina, can you stay with us tonight?” I said. “Just to sleep, I mean.”
Karina nodded, so Yunjin and I led her to the bedroom.
We put Karina in the middle of the bed this time and both of us cuddled against her sides. Karina pulled my hand to her boob, so I lightly squeezed and caressed it.
Karina kissed me and said, “Hold me?” I nodded, and she rolled to her side to face Yunjin. I spooned behind her and embraced her from behind, a hand on each breast. She looked back to caress my face then turned to Yunjin. The two of them talked in low whispers. I couldn’t make out what they were saying and was too tired to care. Soon I was dead asleep.
-
When I awoke it was dark and I was facing Yunjin with Karina was snoring softly behind me. Yunjin looked so lovely as she slept. I had to have her again. I ran my hand over her body and nuzzled her neck. Slowly she started to respond.
We made love, gentle and slow, embracing each other, kissing, neither of us needing to rush.
It was different this time. There was just enough light for me to see her and we gazed into each other’s eyes. Despite what Karina and I had done, Yunjin still wanted me and forgave us. It occurred to me that it wasn’t because she was some doormat who accepted anything, but because she had gained strength from her own struggles with lust and inhibition.
She whispered, “If Karina has a baby, it’ll need a friend.”
That got my attention. “What do you mean?”
“If she’s pregnant, will you knock me up too?”
“That’s not funny, Yunjin.”
She locked her legs around me as I eased in and out of her slowly.
“I’m not joking. I want to do this with you for real. No protection. As often as we can until I’m uh… carrying… uh… your child… uh… hey, be gentle. Make this… uh… last.”
I couldn’t help but push into her forcefully as she said those things. I tried to calm down. I whispered, “Where did this come from, Yunjin? Why would you want that?”
She kissed me. “Because I love you, silly. And you haven’t said it, but I’m pretty sure you love me.”
To our relief, Karina did not get pregnant. She immediately found birth control that worked for her and continued to join Yunjin and me, sharing our bed most weekends and sometimes through the week.
The scare was harrowing, but it brought the three of us closer. There were no more secrets, more trust, and more fun. The three of us started doing everything together: hang out, watch shows, cook, and travel. Except I refused to join the girl’s yoga class.
Like anything, nudity becomes routine once you’re used to it, but I still caught myself staring at the girls in admiration. I was no model, but Karina, always brash, liked to comment on my ass, chest or dick. Yunjin was more reserved, but I knew she enjoyed seeing me on display too.
Occasionally I would get an erection that refused to fade, so either Karina or Yunjin would volunteer to “take care of me.” Likewise, one of the girls would get horny for no reason and need my help. This always turned into an extended period in bed or on the living room floor.
We made up the rules as we went. Yunjin was happy to let Karina and I fuck anytime, but she preferred to be there to watch. Sometimes she needed me afterwards too. No matter how drained Karina left me, I somehow found renewed energy for my lovely Yunjin.
Karina kept up her wild lifestyle. Sometimes she met a new guy and disappeared, but she always gravitated back to us after a few weeks with bitter stories of the latest asshole and laments of “why can’t I just find a guy like you?”
One Sunday morning as the three of us lay in bed, Yunjin said, “We should all just move in together.”
Karina snorted. “Three people in a one-bedroom apartment? We’d go nuts.”
“We could find another place. None of us make much money, but together I think we could buy a house. Even without Karina’s income, we could afford something better.”
Karina and I both looked at her.
“A house?” I asked. “That’s a big step.”
“Is it?” said Yunjin. “You’re still hoping to find someone better than me and Karina? Run off with another girl… or three?”
The thought of being without Yunjin made me feel ill. I couldn’t imagine being without Karina, either. “You know I’m not going anywhere,” I said. “I love you, remember?”
She kissed me. “And I love you. And Karina. Though I’d love her a lot more if she’d stop running away every time she thinks she’s found prince charming.”
“What’s wrong with wanting a guy all to myself?” Karina said.
“Nothing. Though remember your goldfish? Full-time boyfriends take even more care and feeding… even after you’ve got them trained.” She patted my arm in mock condescension.
“Hey,” I said, “So I’m a goldfish to you now?”
“Mmm, no. More like a puppy.”
“Yeah… a pussy hound,” added Karina.
“Karina!” we both exclaimed. I hit her with a pillow.
“I have to admit, I’m never at my place anymore. We could just get a two bedroom somewhere.” Karina said.
“That was my first thought,” said Yunjin. “But have you seen the rent in the city lately? It’s crazy. I did the numbers and it would be cheaper to get a house. Nothing fancy. Maybe some place outside of town.”
“That’s an idea. An old farmhouse with some land. Privacy to walk around outside nude. Fuck on the lawn.” I said,
This time, Karina hit me with the pillow. “See? That’s all he thinks about.”
We found an old house, set back from the road in the trees. The privacy and large yards was perfect for three full-time nudists to play and bask in the sun when we wanted.
When we took possession, the three of us drove out together.
“Never thought we’d own an actual house,” Yunjin said. She held the keys with reverence.
When we got out of the car, we noticed the silence. No traffic, no sirens… just birds and the breeze through the surrounding woods.
“All right!” Karina exclaimed, “Let’s make ourselves at home!” She stripped off her clothes and threw them on the front yard. Yunjin did the same, and both ran for the back.
“Hey! Wait!” I shouted, but they had already rounded the corner. I heard screams. When I got there, Karina and Yunjin stood trying to cover themselves while the two electricians we had hired to install an outside outlet watched and grinned.
The girls fled.
“Sorry about that, guys. They’re just a little excited about finally moving in.” I said.
“Perfectly all right,” said the older electrician. “It’s your home. Say, if you can get them to come back and just… I dunno… stand there, maybe we can put a discount on your bill.”
Once the electricians had left, the three of us lay on the grass of the backyard, naked under the sun, enjoying the freedom of our own property.
“It’s so quiet,” said Yunjin.
“Too quiet,” said Karina, sharing a look with her friend.
Before I knew what was happening, Yunjin had scooted down and take my cock into her mouth while Karina kissed me then lowered her pussy onto my face. I wound up fucking one, then the other, and then the three of us lay back on the grass to recover, naked under the early summer sun.
The house needed work. We watched videos and borrowed books about painting, drywall, carpentry and maintaining a septic tank. Karina enjoyed painting, which I loathed. Yunjin found furniture and took charge organizing. None of us knew what we were doing, but as we learned we became even closer friends and lovers.
Though Karina had her own bedroom, we usually all slept together. Some nights Karina needed me all to herself, so I spent the night alone with her and we exhausted ourselves.
Karina still went into town to party, and ran off with some guy for months after we moved in. A week later she returned, more upset than usual. She never told us what happened, but she needed attention from Yunjin and me for weeks afterward.
The permanence of having our own house, and having two people who cared for her, seemed to calm Karina. She was happier, though still a little wild. She partied in town less and less and, best of all, never ran off again.
Soon the three of us realized that our odd three-way relationship was stable. We lived in near harmony, sharing the household duties and finances like we shared a bed each night.
I never saw jealousy between my two wonderful women, but life in the house wasn’t perfect. We had squabbles about money and petty things.
One evening Karina stood in front of me while I was watching TV and said, “underwear and socks are not home decor, you know. Can you take them to your room when you get home, instead of just leaving them everywhere?”
“Well, toenail clippings and pubic hair aren’t either,” I retorted, referring to Karina’s habit of grooming her feet and bush while she watched TV.
“Ass,” she said, playfully.
“Slut,”
Karina attacked me. We wound up wrestling. Karina was agile. Often our matches ended with her astride my neck, pinning me down and shoving her pussy in my face. Or, she would have her legs hooked around my waist, shoving her boobs into my mouth.
That time, however, I dominated and forced my hard cock between her legs.
“Don’t you dare,” she said, looking down at my dick.
When Yunjin heard the commotion, she strolled into the living room to watch. She loved watching Karina and me fuck almost as much as she loved getting fucked herself.
“Yunjin!” said Karina, struggling to throw me off, “Help!”
“Okay,” said Yunjin. She crouched and pinned Karina’s arms above her head.
“Help ME, not him… ohhhhh.”
Karina groaned as I pushed my cock into her love tunnel. But then she stopped struggling and spread her legs wide, letting me take her.
Yunjin held Karina’s arms, breathing with excitement and lovingly stroking Karina’s hair while I fucked her on our living room floor.
It was our favorite way of making up.
Yunjin started talking about kids again. If we were in the city and saw a baby, she would stop to make a fuss. Once we walked by a playground and she insisted on watching the antics of the toddlers until their caretakers started looking at with unease.
“You should do it, Yunjin,” said Karina one Saturday as we sunned ourselves naked in the yard. “Let him knock you up.”
“So should you,” said Yunjin.
Karina snorted. “I can barely take care of myself.”
“Wouldn’t you like a little baby? You’d be a great mom. I know you would.”
“Like hell. I’d drop the kid on his head the first day. And the whole childbirth thing? Doesn’t it squick you out? It’s gross! It’s okay for your cavernous cunt to get all stretched out, but our guy likes my tight pussy.”
Yunjin gasped. “God, you’re filthy. I’ve never heard any complaints from him. And I’m pretty sure he’s spent a lot more time in me than in you.” She stuck out her tongue.
“Ladies, once again, I’m right here, you know. If that’s a concern, Karina, I hear they can stitch you up afterward. Make you tighter than ever.”
Both girls goes “Ewww” and slapped me.
Yunjin kept talking about kids throughout the summer.
“I know,” she said one day, “We’ll go camping to the same place. You can fuck me just like before, only we’ll time it so I’m at peak fertility. Wouldn’t that be romantic?”
At first, I wasn’t sure that we were ready, but Yunjin convinced me. She stopped her birth control, and we began planning the trip.
A few days later, Karina asked me to sleep just with her, in her room. She was clingy that night, wrapping herself around me, urging me to go deep and fuck her hard.
“I’m going to lose you two.”
“How can you lose us? We’re family.” I said, surprised.
“You, Yunjin and a baby will be family. I’ll be a fifth wheel.”
“Karina, what’s wrong? I thought you were happy about our plans.”
“I am. I’m happy for Yunjin. I’m happy for you. But it doesn’t leave any place for me.”
“Your place is here. We love you. I love you. You know that. We’re together. All of us. The only thing that would change is how little sleep we’ll get with a baby around.”
Karina burrowed her head against me and said nothing.
Yunjin and I were installing a new kitchen faucet by ourselves when she said, “We never asked Karina to come camping with us, you know.”
I snorted. “We never asked because neither of us could imagine Karina camping. She’s a city girl.”
“We’re city people too, and we did it. You’ve gone backwoods camping several times.”
“Yeah, but Karina gets grumpy if she doesn’t have immediate access to a latte or high heels.”
“C’mon. She likes it out here. I think she’s feeling left out. We should at least ask.”
We did. To my surprise, Karina agreed. She even seemed excited. She started pestering us with questions: how long was the hike? How did you go to the bathroom…”
“Are you really sure you want to come?” I asked.
“I can be just as tough as Yunjin, you know. And if you’re determined to turn our poor sweet Yunjin into an unwed mother, she’ll need me to hold her hand while you do it. Or hold her down if she gets cold feet.”
The summer heat hit us as we emerged from the cool shade of the forest. I spread my arms and said, “Behold.”
Karina and Yunjin looked around at the camping area and out at the little lake. “This is so beautiful!” exclaimed Karina.
“And all just for us.” I added.
The girls set their backpacks on the ground and groaned with relief. “Oh, it’s good to get that off,” said Karina. “You guys call this fun?” She wiped sweat from her face and neck.
I set my pack down too. “Yeah, but it’s still a lot to carry.”
“Good thing you two were carrying most of it. I thought I’d die back there on the trail.”
“Time to cool off,” said Yunjin, pulling off her clothes. “Let’s go swim.”
We stripped and ran into the little lake.
“Oh my God,” said Karina as she swam on her back, her large breasts breaking the surface. “This is wonderful.”
“I can’t believe it’s been two years since we were here,” said Yunjin, also floating on her back. Her modest breasts barely poked from the water.
We floated and swam, confident no one would disturb us. Though the lake had two campsites, we had reserved the other one to make sure we would be alone on the long weekend.
When we had cooled down, we toweled each other off on the shore.
Karina squeezed the water from her long jet-black hair then ran her fingers through it to slick back over her head. Her upraised arms and arching back lifting her breasts to the sun was a breathtaking sight.
We got to work setting up camp.
“You guys have to tell me what to do,” said Karina, “and don’t make fun of me. You know I’ve never camped before.”
Yunjin and I instructed Karina in gathering fallen branches for firewood and how to fill the filter bag for clean water, then we all set up our new three-person tent.
Karina peered in the tent doorway, “Three-person tent, huh?
“We’re used to snuggling,” said Yunjin. “It’ll be fine.”
We all crawled inside to lay on the camping mats, the girls on either side of me.
“See?” I said. ‘It’s a palace. Lots of room, as long as we spoon.’ I rolled Yunjin onto her side and nestled behind her. “Mmm. After that hike I could use a nap.”
“Oh no you don’t,” she said, squirming away. “I know what kind of ‘nap’ you have in mind. We still have things to set up.”
Yunjin crawled out of the tent and pulled me with her. Karina reluctantly emerged as well.
“Okay, we’ll play later. Someone needs to string up a clothesline, and we need to get a line into a tree to hang our packs.” I said.
“Why?” asked Karina.
“Animals,” said Yunjin. “You hang the packs and anything else that smells in a tree away from the camp. So raccoons and bears don’t rip them open at night or follow the scent to our camp.”
Karina furrowed her brow. “You never said anything about bears.”
“There are only black bears around here. They’re no big deal.”
“I don’t care if they’re teddy bears. A bear is a bear.”
“Sort of. Black bears aren’t that aggressive, as long as cubs aren’t around, anyway. You can usually scare them away. And I have bear spray just in case.”
Karina wrapped her arms around herself. “You guys call this fun? Let’s just go home. We have trees there. And no bears.”
“And you always say you’re the adventurous one,” I teased.
“Yeah, for parties. Not for getting eaten by wildlife.”
“Don’t worry. I’ve camped here many times. Never seen anything but deer and raccoons.”
We gave Karina rope to string up as a clothesline while Yunjin and I found the tree we had used on our first camping trip and got it ready to hoist our packs later that evening.
When we returned to camp, Karina had hung up our one mutual towel on the line.
“Everything is all set.” I looked at Yunjin suggestively. “Now we can take that nap.”
“It’s too hot. Even hotter in the tent. Besides, I’m not horny.” Yunjin said
I sighed. “Karina?”
“What? No way. It’s too hot.”
“You’re not horny either?”
“Nope,” said Karina, putting her hands behind her and rocking back on her heels. She had a little smile.
“Well, I am,” I said, “and as alpha male, I demand to mate with my harem.”
The girls scoffed.
“Listen to him,” said Karina. “He thinks he’s in charge.”
I spread my arms and stepped towards Yunjin with exaggerated stalking movements. She laughed, backing away. “Keep away, ‘alpha male.’”
Trying not to laugh, I growled, “The first girl I catch, I fuck,” then lunged at Yunjin. She yelped and ran. I turned to Karina. With a big smile, she bolted in the other direction.
I chased the girls, laughing and screaming. Yunjin was the slowest, but she was agile. Each time I nearly caught her, she weaved and feinted away. After a few more times, she plunged into the water and swam to the middle.
“No fair!” I yelled. Yunjin was a powerful swimmer… there was no way I would catch her in the lake.
I turned back to Karina. I herded her to the edge of the campsite where thorny bushes and a large tree blocked her way. I spread my arms as I approached, ready to catch her if she bolted.
Karina stood with her back against the tree, looking left and right. “Stay away, you beast,” she laughed.
“You’re mine now,” I growled dramatically and edged closer.
By now, I was hard as steel. Karina’s eyes widened when she saw it.
“You think I’m your bitch to fuck whenever you feel like it?” she said.
I closed the gap and pinned her to the tree, holding her wrists with one hand. “Uh huh. And I feel like it, Now.”
Karina just grinned as I forced her legs apart and started rubbing my cock along her slit. She was already wet. I started sliding back and forth, becoming slick from her wetness.
“Beast,” she breathed, but she pushed back at me.
I released her wrists and put my arms under her ass, lifting her up against the tree and forcing her legs around me. I positioned my cock up her entrance and pushed. Karina inhaled sharply, eyes widening as I penetrated her. She held onto the tree behind her as I started fucking her against it. Soon she wrapped her legs and arms tight around me and pulled me into a deep kiss.
I rutted deep into her grasping tunnel with no thought of prolonging our mating or getting her off. I was consumed with a primal need to fuck this beautiful woman until I filled her.
It didn’t take long. A few final thrusts and I grunted, cumming hard into her. Karina clung and panted, her welcoming womb accepting my seed.
Eventually, my heart slowed and I lowered her legs. I kept myself inside her as we kissed and embraced. When I finally softened and slipped from her, I pulled Karina away from the tree and turned her around to brush bits of bark from her back.
Karina looked back. “Ass,” she said.
“You bring it out in me,” I grinned. “You okay?”
“I’ve just been fucked by my ‘alpha male’ How could I not be okay?” She forced a smile, then it trailed away into an odd, unreadable expression.
Yunjin was drying off when we got back to the tent.
“No fair going in the water,” I said. “You know you’re a better swimmer.”
“I wasn’t going to let you fuck ME against some tree. When we do it, I want it long and slow.”
“Suits me,” I said. “I think I’m ready for an actual nap now.”
The three of us crawled back into the tent. It was still hot, but we snoozed for an hour, entwined in a heap.
Daylight was fading when we woke. While Karina and I washed up in the lake, Yunjin started a fire. We ate dinner, warmed by the fire, watching the sun set and stars slowly emerge.
“Oh,” said Yunjin, “I forgot.” She fetched a small carton from her pack and handed it to Karina.
“Instant Chai Tea Latte Mix,” read Karina. “Gee, guys… you shouldn’t have.”
We laughed and Yunjin sat back down beside me, resting her head on my shoulder as she watched the fire and absently played with my dick. When I started getting hard, she glanced at me with a wry smile and lowered her head to take me in her mouth. After a few minutes, she stretched out by the fire and guided my head down between her legs. I licked her gently for a long while as she lay in the firelight. I concentrated my efforts and soon brought her to orgasm as she moaned and pushed my face into her.
I slid up Yunjin’s body, ready to enter her, but she pushed back on my chest.
“Wait.”
“What’s wrong?” I asked, searching her eyes.
“I… I don’t know about this.”
I rolled off and held her. “This is what we planned.”
“I know. But… all my life I was told to stay away from guys. Getting pregnant was the worst thing that could ever happen. And now…”
“…and now you’re all grown up. You’re a woman, not a girl. Your family isn’t here to brand you a slut. You decide what’s right.”
“My head knows that,” said Yunjin. “But inside…”
I was afraid this might happen. We had planned this trip for months, but it was a big step for Yunjin. The final step, in her mind, that would separate her from her past: getting pregnant.
We timed the trip so she would be unprotected and at her most fertile. She was more vulnerable to impregnation than the first time we had coupled at the same campsite.
Back then, I had taken Yunjin backwoods camping for the first time. She was determined to shed the demons of guilt and shame from her strict upbringing. Just being alone with a guy was a big step, let alone camping in the wilderness with one. But the beauty of the surroundings and the sense of freedom led to our first experiments with nudity, followed by us fucking without protection later on. It was stupid, but fortunately Yunjin did not get pregnant. That weekend, Yunjin started discovering her inner strength and started living free, acting as she judged best, no longer following the repressive edicts of her parents.
As we lay together by the fire, I let Yunjin wrestle with the last remnants of those feelings of guilt and shame.
Finally, she urged me on top of her.
“I’m through being scared.” She spread her legs. ‘Do it,’ she smiled. “Fuck me. Knock me up. Make love to me for real.”
Our coupling was tender, both understand it wasn’t just to satisfy our lust. There would be life-changing consequences for all of us. We hoped.
When I approached the point of no return, I looked into Yunjin’s eyes.
“Last chance,” I panted.
Yunjin’s eyes were bright. “Let go,” she whispered. “Make me yours forever.”
I pushed in deep and with two more strokes emptied all I had into my love’s fertile body. She groaned and arched her back as she felt me inseminate her. It signalled victory over her last taboo. She was finally free of her demons.
From the other side of the fire, Karina watched excited as I hopefully impregnated her best friend.
“Way to go, Yunjin,” she said.
As we lay together recovering, Yunjin said, “You were supposed to fuck me first this weekend, you know.”
“I know. But you ran into the lake. What’s am I supposed to do? And how can I deprive poor Karina?”
Yunjin just shook her head.
“How about this,” I said, “this weekend I fuck you the most.”
“I guess that’s okay, as long every time is like what we just did.”
The three of us sat around the fire, joking and chatting until the air grew chilly. Then we secured the campsite for the night and crawled into the tent.
Sometime that night, Karina woke me in her usual way: stroking me to hardness. The remains of the campfire cast flickering light through the tent wall. Yunjin was snoring gently, her back to us.
“I can’t sleep,” Karina whispered. “I keep thinking I hear bears.”
“Well, if one comes around, I’ll go out and beat him up. I have quite a reputation in these woods, you know.”
She chuckled. “Oh, yes. Please protect me, Mr. Man!”
“Seriously, they’re really more scared of us. Especially me.” I grinned.
“You ass.” She felt my hard dick. “Ready for more?”
“I’m always ready for you, Karina.” I gently rolled on top of her and poked my hardness between her legs. She must have been playing with herself… she was already wet.
Karina sighed happily as I slid into her. No matter how many times I fucked that wonderful woman I marveled at her wet tightness and how different she felt from Yunjin.
Karina breathed in excitement, tilting her hips, driving me deeper.
We said nothing more as we fucked in dim light. Then I remembered she hadn’t come last time, so I pulled out and started sliding down her body, eager to lick her to an orgasm or three.
“No,” she breathed, urging me back up. “Not now. Just fuck me.”
“I want to make you cum.”
“Later. Just fuck me. Come on… breed me like you bred Yunjin. Knock me up. Make me yours too.”
That was odd. Karina had never played that game before. She knew the idea excited me, but pregnancy horrified her. She never even teased about me impregnating her.
I slid up and she sighed as I pushed back into her. Karina lay there, passively letting me take her, then slowly she started to respond, pushing back and moaning. She was tight as always, but it felt like her pussy grasped my dick even more, and she was so warm.
It was so stimulating I reached my peak much sooner than usual I almost collapsed on her as my muscles weakened when I came. Karina just lay there, eyes wide and staring at the ceiling of the tent as I inseminated her for the second time that day.
After a few moments, Karina gently pushed me off. Instead of cuddling up against me, she stayed on her back with knees raised.
Yunjin, however, snuggled against my other side. She said nothing, just pecked my cheek and reached down to feel me, still slick from Karina. Just like that first time, Yunjin had been listening silently while I fucked her best friend, enjoying every minute.
After three nights camping with the two women, playing, swimming and making love, I was exhausted. But the trip was successful: two weeks later, Yunjin was pregnant. The three of us celebrated and started planning.
Four weeks after the trip, Karina rushed to the bathroom one morning and threw up.
Yunjin went to see what was wrong. She returned a long time later, pulling Karina behind her. She was holding a pregnancy test wand.
“So… you know how I always told Karina that our baby could use a friend?”
I sat up. “Oh, no.”
Yunjin nodded, eyes wide.
I got up to hug them. Karina avoided my eyes.
“How did this happen?” I said. “How far along are you?”
Yunjin said, “Apparently, the same as me.”
I tried to process that. “So… I’m the father?”
Karina gasped and pushed me. “Of course! Who else would I let knock me up?”
“Let me? So, on our camping trip… you weren’t protected? On purpose?”
Karina look to Yunjin, “Guys are really slow sometimes, aren’t they?”
“But why? I thought having a kid squicked you out.”
Karina buried her face against my chest with one arm around me and the other around Yunjin. “Because I don’t want to lose you.”
I met Yunjin’s eyes while stroking Karina’s hair. “That would never happen. I told you… we’re a family.”
“Well, we sure are now,” said Karina. She looked up. “Angry?”
“Shocked,” I said. “Amazed. But not angry. You know I wanted to have a baby with you too. But now how the hell am I going to deal with two pregnant women at the same time.”
“We’ll take it easy on you. It’s going to be a big change. For all of us.” Yunjin said
I started pulling Karina and Yunjin to the bed.
“What are you doing?”
“Seeing if I can give you both twins.”
“But that’s not how… never mind. Let’s try anyway.” Yunjin laughed and pulled Karina onto the bed with her.
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girlrotterr · 8 months ago
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But I'm a lesbian!
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ellie x abby x dina x fem!reader a/n: inspired by the movie, "but i'm a cheerleader" !! Did my own little spin on it. (This may have a part two!)
→ Part two! → Part three! → Part four! → Part five!  → Part six!
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Forced to a camp known as "True Directions," your arrival was no choice of your own. Your parents, upon discovering your sexuality, had made the decision to send you there. As you followed your guide towards the dormitories, someone caught your eye—a girl with auburn hair, casually puffing on a cigarette.
Noticing your presence, the girl glanced up and rolled her eyes. Your guide gestured towards her, prompting her to approach you. Extending her hand, she introduced herself, "Ellie."
"Hello," you responded, your voice betraying your nerves as you shook her hand, noting its soft yet firm grip.
With a sigh, Ellie remarked, "they sent new meat here again, huh?" She took another drag from her cigarette, casting a judgmental gaze in your direction.
"I’m sure to be out of the way," you said, trying to sound confident. "I’ll pass every trial here to get back home."
A smirk tugged at the corner of her lips. “Uh-huh..." she mused. “You’ll be here a while then."
“Ahem," the guide cleared her throat towards Ellie, who responded with an eye roll before retreating to her pink bed.  
"Very well then, I will leave you to unpack your things. This will be your dorm. You will share this space with three other roommates, feel free to report anything back to me," she said, her tall and commanding presence by her bouncing blond hair as she talked.
"Especially anything involving this one," she added, shooting a glance at Ellie. 
"Well," the guide grasped your arms, giving them a squeeze, "welcome to 'True Directions,' we'll fix you right up, dear!”
You gave a hesitant half-smile, trying to hide your discomfort. 
Returning your gesture with a bright smile, the guide nodded happily before leaving, closing the door behind her with a soft click.
Silence. 
Clutching onto your suitcases, the silence became increasingly awkward, and you debated whether to speak up. Should you ask where to put your belongings? But the fear of annoying or bothering Ellie made you hesitant.
Fuck it.
"Um, excuse me, where can I—"
"There," Ellie interrupted, her tone nonchalant as she pointed toward a corner of the room, her gaze still not meeting yours.
Your eyes followed her gesture to an empty white dresser tucked away, starkly different from the others that were already occupied. Making your way towards the dresser, you took in the room once more. The overwhelming femininity was hard to ignore—pink walls, beds, and shelves adorned with stuffed animals. Setting your suitcase down with a thud, you unzipped it, the sound of the zipper echoing loudly in the silent room.
Opening the drawer, the scent of brand new furniture wafted across your nose, tickling it and nearly causing you to sneeze.
Ellie got up from her bed, pulling open her drawer with a tug. In it were an assortment of items—makeup, hair accessories, and jewelry jumbled together. Rummaging through it, Ellie let out a sharp exhale, finally finding something from the depths of the drawer.
Without a glance in your direction, she held out a ribbon and a few hair clips. "Here," she muttered.
Your eyes widened at the adorable accessories as she tossed them over to you. "Put your hair up or something. It's better not to have it in the way, especially during our routines.”
"Ah, thank you," you expressed, catching them. "Are these.. yours?"
"Yeah... unfortunately," Ellie responded dryly.
With a nod, you started to arrange your hair with the clips.
As you styled your hair, the weight of Ellie's gaze pressed against your back like a physical force. Every subtle movement you made was studied, from the way you lifted strands of hair to the careful twisting of the ribbon around the ponytail. Even the simple act of tucking a stray lock behind your ear felt intense.
What’s this girl's deal?
The intensity of her stare became almost suffocating, leaving your hands trembling slightly as you worked. Despite her focus only on your hair, the sensation of being under her gaze felt like she was peering into your soul.
Finally, Ellie broke the silence with a quiet, husky voice, her words cutting through the tension. "You need a mirror?"
Her gaze remained fixed on you, relentless.
"No," you managed to reply, attempting to be confident.
But the moment her voice echoed throughout the room, heat began rising to your cheeks, and you couldn’t help but hesitate. Her presence felt overwhelming, a mix of nerves, fear, and desire swirling within you, all under her attention.
“Hm..” Ellie replied, seeming more curious now. She uncrossed her arms and slowly walked over to you. You could hear the way Ellie’s footsteps made the floor creak as she walked.
"Hm?" you managed to utter as Ellie closed in on you, her presence surrounding you with every step she took. The breath from her lips brushed against the nape of your neck as she leaned in.
"You're missing a strand," Ellie said, her voice softer than before.
The sensation of her being so close, her breath teasing your skin. You wanted to turn around and face her.
Her closeness was so overwhelming.
As Ellie's hand brushed against your hair, a sharp shiver coursed through your spine, setting your heartbeat into a quick rhythm. Her touch lingered, fingers twirling strands of your hair, as she leaned in even closer, so suffocatingly close. It felt as though Ellie was on the verge of whispering something, her breath agonizingly near-
"Yo, Ellie!"
The tension in the room broke as Dina and Abby burst in, causing Ellie to let go of your hair and step back.
Their expressions shifted abruptly from excitement to surprise as they noticed you. Dina's curious gaze looked over, her head tilting in confusion, while Abby's cold stare pierced through you.
"You must be the new one," Abby remarked, her tone icy, her eyes never leaving you as if dissecting your very being.
"Y-yeah.. I am," you responded, finally finishing your hair.
Abby simply nodded in acknowledgment, while Dina chuckled to herself.
"Aw, the new girl is all nervous!" Dina's teasing remark was followed by a smirk and a playful wave of her hand. She shifted her attention to Ellie, observing her growing annoyance. Dina seemed to catch on to something, finding the situation amusing.
"Ooooh! Ellie was hitting on ya!" Dina's snickering only added to Ellie's frustration as she clenched her jaw tightly, arms crossed.
Abby, maintaining her silent observation, continued to stare at the both of you.
"Ah! no..she was just helping me with my hair," you replied, attempting to stop the teasing.
"Awh. Is that so?" Dina's teasing tone persisted as she continued to giggle, her gaze towards Ellie who remained annoyed.
Abby's gaze suddenly shifted as she walked towards you, gently pushing a strand of hair behind your ear. Her touch was surprisingly tender.
"There," she remarked softly, a smile gracing her lips, the gesture catching you off guard. It was so unexpected. "You had missed a strand."
Abby looked back at Ellie, a smirk on her lips, her eyes flickering as she made a mocking glance with her.
Suddenly, the camp director barged in, her authoritative voice vibrating throughout the room. "Ladies!" she commanded, making all the girls snap their attention towards the door where the camp director now stood.
Ellie groaned as soon as she heard that familiar voice.
"All of you, get out for morning exercise," the director ordered, her stern gaze scanning everyone. "Now."
With a swift turn, the camp director walked out of the room, the echo of her clicking heels fading as she left. Abby, Dina, and Ellie all groaned in unison, knowing what was to come. They made their way to their designated dressers, preparing to change into their gym clothes.
Amidst the shuffling of clothing, you voiced your confusion. "W-what are we doing?"
Abby scoffed at your question, a smirk on her lips. "Did Ellie not go through the routines and rules with you?"
You shook your head.
"Not surprising," she remarked before chuckling, "she always seems to get distracted-"
“We're doing morning cardio and stretching routines,” Ellie cut in, her voice clear and assertive, pulling out her sports bra and short shorts. “Your gym clothes are in your dresser.”
Abby bit her lip, suppressing a laugh. "Well, there you go.”
You nodded in understanding, “thanks..”
Walking to your dresser, you pulled open the top drawer, revealing a variety of outfits and uniforms, all varying shades of pink. The sight left your head spinning a bit as you realized this would be your life for the next couple of months.
As you began changing, you felt a wave of self-consciousness wash over you. With hesitant movements, you peeled off your shirt and skirt, the fabric slipping from your skin with a soft rustle. All the while, you were aware of Abby and Ellie's eyes lingering on you.
 Abby's gaze, though subtle, was sharply observant, her eyes tracing up and down your body with an almost predatory glare. It was as if she was memorizing every curve and contour. Meanwhile, Ellie's attention was more focused, her gaze lingering on specific areas of your body, like your hips and chest. There was an intensity in her stare, a curiosity that was borderline intrusive.
Slap! 
With a sharp sting on your ass, a sudden jolt of surprise chilled through you, causing you to yelp. "You'll make us late at this pace!" Dina's voice rang out, her arm wrapping around you protectively, shielding you from the view of Abby and Ellie.
"Ah! You're right," you exclaimed, quickly slipping into your gym clothes.
Dina gave you a quick grin before turning her attention towards Abby and Ellie. Squinting her eyes playfully, she shook her head slowly, teasingly disappointed in the two of them. Abby hurriedly looked away, pretending to be preoccupied with tying her shoelaces, while Ellie rolled her eyes.
───
As you and the other girls made your way to the track, you found yourselves walking together in a small group. Ellie and Abby led the way, showing no signs of slowing down despite your struggle to keep up. Meanwhile, Dina’s pace was slower, occasionally glancing at you.
"So, how'd you get caught?" Dina asked slyly, a mischievous look in her eyes.
You turned to look at her, taken aback by the sudden question. "What?"
"You were sent here for a reason," Dina said curiously, making Abby and Ellie turn their heads, intrigued to hear your response.
"I..don't think I want to share," you said, avoiding eye contact from feeling a bit nervous.
"Oh, come on!" Dina urged, now walking next to you, realizing your hesitance. "Don't be so shy. How about we tell you ours? Will that make you less embarrassed?"
"Hmm..alright," you agreed. Maybe learning about their experiences would help get to know them.
Excitedly, Dina clapped her hands together. "Okay, okay! I'll go first." She moved closer to you, her shoulder practically bumping into yours. "I got caught watching lesbian porn."
A snicker escaped Ellie's lips as she tried to hold back her laughter.
Dina shot a playful glare. "You have no right to laugh, El's."
"Doesn't make it any less funny," Ellie retorted.
Dina scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Since it’s sooo funny, you go then."
Ellie's eyes locked onto yours, her voice embarrassed. "I ordered a strap online, and it got delivered to the wrong address. To my fucking neighbor, Seth. Dude went ballistic and sent me here, said I needed to be controlled."
A rush of heat flooded your cheeks as Ellie's words sank in, full of curiosity and intrigue. The mere idea of her wearing a strap sent a flow of sensations that pulsed throughout your body. Your throat became dry trying to visualize it. 
"Ab's! Your turn!" Dina interrupted excitedly, Abby's story was always her favorite.
Abby smirked, turning her gaze towards you. "Unlike Ellie, I got to use my strap," she remarked mischievously.
Ellie groaned at Abby'scomment, clearly unimpressed.
“I got caught fucking my father's assistant nurse with it.”
Dina squealed as she shook your arm excitedly. "Now THAT'S a coming out story!" she exclaimed.
Ellie shot Dina a glare, clearly annoyed by her reaction. With a scoff, she turned her head away, facing in the opposite direction.
Abby, on the other hand, smirked at Ellie's and playfully hit her back. "Aw, it's okay, El's," she said reassuringly.
"Okay, okay, tell us yours now," Dina urged eagerly, her and Abby's curious gazes fixed on you,
“Well..” you began, your hands fidgeting nervously as you mustered up the courage. “My parents walked in on me and my cheer captain…” You hesitated for a moment before continuing “...69’ing on the kitchen counter.” 
Ellie quickly snapped her head back to look at you. Dina and Abby’s eyes widened, completely startled.
“Y-yeah…” you confirmed, meeting the girls' shocked gazes. “Mid-squirt too…”
Ellie’s eyes widened as if they were going to pop. Dina’s jaw dropped, with her mouth slowly curving into a smirk, “You fucking win.”
───
"Alright, ladies," the head director announced, her voice carrying across the track, “forty-five minutes around the track, as per usual. Afterward, we hit the showers in preparation for cooking classes."
"Remember, ladies," she continued excitedly, "these skills aren't just beneficial, they also attract men! It's just another step closer to becoming 'normal'."
The moment the word "normal" left the director's lips, you noticed the collective eye rolls and groans from the other girls. Ellie's jaw tightened as she stared away, grumbling under her breath. Abby crossed her arms, completely unamused, while Dina couldn't help but snicker, lowering her face to hide her giggle.
With a sharp blow of the whistle, the director signaled the start of the morning run.
As you began your laps around the track, you couldn't help but notice the effortless speed and stamina of Ellie and the other girls. They seemed to glide around the track with ease.
Struggling to keep up, your legs began to burn. Your breath came in short, ragged gasps as you pushed yourself onward.
"Hey, you doing okay?" Abby asked.
"Ye..yeah..." you managed to reply between heavy breaths.
Abby arched an eyebrow, clearly seeing through you. "You do know we have about 20 more laps to go, right?"
Before you could respond, a sudden stumble sent you tumbling to the ground. Abby instinctively reached out to help, but her attempt only resulted in her losing her balance, causing her to trip and accidentally pull Ellie down with her.
Ellie hit the concrete hard, her knee taking the force of the fall. Gritting her teeth, she clenched her jaw tightly as pain shot through her scrapped knee. With all three of you on the ground, the sudden scene caused a chuckle from Dina. "Holy shit, you guys fell like bowling pins," she remarked.
"Shit, sorry El's-" Abby began to apologize.
“What the fuck is your problem?!” Ellie yelled, her tone cold as she glared up at Abby.
Abby glared back at Ellie, her expression tense. "What-"
“Watch where you’re fucking going. It’s not that hard,” Ellie snarled, gritting her teeth as she noticed the large scrape on her knee.
“T-that was on me-" you added, feeling guilty for the accident.
Abby suddenly got up, her face contorted with anger as she looked down at Ellie. “I didn’t mean to, I-"
Ellie suddenly stood up too, her height making her have to look up at Abby. “I’m so fucking sick of you trying to assert something. It’s fucking annoying.”
Abby scoffed, “Yeah? I’m tired of your pussy fucking attitude.” She then moved closer towards Ellie, the sudden bump causing Ellie to sway a bit.
Ellie chuckled, tilting her head to the side before locking eyes with Abby. “Pussy, huh?” 
“You are what you fucking eat,” Abby snapped back, her tone sharp.
You got up from the concrete floor, every inch of your body feeling the lingering sting from the sudden impact. “She didn’t mean to, I tripped and-” you tried to explain, but before you could finish, Ellie raised her fist. Her initial target being Abby, who managed to step back just in time to avoid the blow. Unfortunately, you stepped further, positioning yourself between them, but before you could react, Ellie's fist mistakenly met your nose.
“Holy shit!” Dina yelled, her hand covering her mouth in shock.
You felt the impact jolt through your body as you stumbled back, finding stability in Abby's embrace as her arms wrapped around you from behind.
“Fuck, I am so sorry-" Ellie began to apologize, her voice filled with remorse.
“Fucking really?!?” Abby yelled, frustrated as she stepped you to the side. “You fucking hit her!”
“I didn’t mean to!” Ellie yelled back, her tone defensive as she tried to explain herself.
“Didn’t mean to? You punched her!” 
“G-guys, I’m fine-" you said, your voice strained through the pain, attempting to step towards them again, holding your throbbing nose.
“I was clearly trying to punch your bitch ass!” Ellie yelled.
“Oh yeah?” Abby raised her fist, aiming for Ellie, her knuckles clenched as she intended to give her a piece of her mind for hurting you and being such a brat. However, as you stepped in between them once again, Abby's fist accidentally hit you, the impact shocking you and causing a blur in your vision.
“Oh my god!” Dina yelled, her eyes widening in horror as she flinched.
You stumbled backward, the world blurring around you as you tripped over your loose shoelace, your body rushing towards the concrete floor once again, jarring your senses and sending a wave of pain through your body.
Abby took her hands to her chest, her mouth covered in disbelief.
“fuck, fuck, fuck! Are you okay?” Ellie exclaimed, her voice filled with concern as she quickly knelt down beside you.
Your nose was now bleeding, droplets of blood scattering across the concrete floor like raindrops. The metallic tang of blood filled the air, mixing with the scent of sweat. You winced as pain shot through your face, throbbing relentlessly.
“I think my nose is broken…” you managed to say, your words muffled by the blood dripping down your face.
“Now nobody can sit on her face,” Dina groaned.
2K notes · View notes
its-avalon-08 · 3 months ago
Text
what are we running from? (op81)
(monza has my heart, but what is mclaren doing? papaya rules and all that shit for more tension? our boys deserve better! enjoy this one because i shed a few tears writing it <3 )
✦ pairing - oscar piastri x female!reader
✦ genre - friends to lovers, neglect, a LOT angst, alot of tears, super long im sorry
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Oscar Piastri and Y/N had always been inseparable, their bond forged in the fires of shared experiences and unwavering support. From the outside, their relationship seemed almost too good to be true—two best friends who had known each other for years, with a connection so deep that it felt like they were more than just friends, even if neither of them had ever dared to say it out loud.
It had started back in their school days, when they first met in a classroom filled with the nervous energy of new beginnings. Oscar, with his quiet determination and sharp wit, had caught Y/N’s attention almost immediately. She, on the other hand, had this vibrant, magnetic personality that drew people in, and before long, they had become fast friends.
As time went on, their friendship only grew stronger. They spent countless hours together, whether it was studying for exams, watching movies, or just hanging out at each other’s houses. They knew each other’s quirks, habits, and fears better than anyone else. Oscar could tell when Y/N was upset just by the way she fidgeted with her hair, and Y/N knew exactly when Oscar needed a distraction by the way his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.
They were a team, an unbreakable pair that everyone else could only admire. Friends would often joke about how they were like an old married couple—finishing each other’s sentences, knowing each other’s favorite foods, and sharing a kind of unspoken communication that others found both endearing and perplexing.
But it wasn’t just their closeness that made their relationship special; it was the way they supported each other through everything. When Oscar started his journey in racing, Y/N was there every step of the way, cheering him on from the sidelines, offering words of encouragement when things got tough, and celebrating with him after every victory. She was his rock, his constant, and in a world that was often unpredictable, Y/N was the one thing Oscar could always count on.
And Oscar was just as devoted to Y/N. He was the one she called in the middle of the night when she couldn’t sleep, the one who listened patiently to her dreams and fears, the one who knew exactly how to make her laugh when she was feeling down. He was the calm to her storm, the steady presence that grounded her when everything else felt chaotic.
Their physical closeness was another thing that set them apart. Oscar and Y/N were never shy about showing affection—whether it was cuddling on the couch during movie nights, holding hands when they were out together, or the way Y/N would rest her head on Oscar’s shoulder when she was tired. It was the kind of closeness that blurred the lines between friendship and something more, but they had always kept it in the realm of friendship, never daring to cross that invisible boundary.
Yet, underneath it all, there was something unspoken between them, something that both of them felt but neither of them acknowledged. It was in the way Oscar’s heart would skip a beat whenever Y/N smiled at him, or the way Y/N’s breath would catch whenever Oscar hugged her just a little too tightly. It was the feeling that there was something more between them, something that could change everything if they ever dared to explore it.
But that unspoken connection, as strong as it was, also carried a weight—a fear of losing what they had if they ever tried to turn it into something more. And so, they kept it hidden, buried beneath layers of friendship, where it was safe from the risks that came with love.
They were best friends—inseparable, devoted, and utterly reliant on each other. But beneath the surface, there was a tension, a yearning that neither of them wanted to admit. And it was only a matter of time before that tension would come to a head, forcing them to confront the feelings they had both tried so hard to ignore.
<3 <3
Oscar had always known he was in trouble when it came to Y/N. From the moment they met, they had clicked in a way that felt effortless, natural—like they were meant to be in each other's lives. She was his best friend, his confidante, his comfort. But somewhere along the way, Oscar had started feeling something more. He fell for her, hard, and though every fiber of his being screamed to tell her, he never did. He couldn’t risk losing her.
But things had changed. Y/N had started seeing someone new, and for the first time, Oscar felt the ground shift beneath him. Their usual routine of late-night calls, movie marathons, and endless cuddles had been replaced by her excited chatter about her new boyfriend, her plans for dates, and the moments that didn’t include him.
flashback
The shift in Y/N’s behavior started subtly, but it grew more apparent with each passing day. Oscar noticed it first at the small gatherings they used to enjoy together—nights spent with their closest friends, where they would usually stick close, laughing at inside jokes and exchanging amused glances from across the room. But now, things were different.
It began with Jake, the guy Y/N had started seeing. At first, Oscar didn’t think much of it—he’d seen Y/N date before, and it had never really affected their friendship. But something about Jake seemed to pull her further away from him in a way that felt like a slow, painful drift.
The first time it really hit him was at a party one of their mutual friends was hosting. Oscar had arrived a bit late, expecting to find Y/N waiting for him with a drink in hand, eager to catch him up on everything he’d missed. But instead, he found her on the other side of the room, wrapped up in Jake’s arms, laughing at something he’d said.
Oscar tried to brush it off, forcing a smile as he approached. “Hey, Y/N,” he greeted her, hoping for the usual warmth in her eyes.
She glanced over at him, but the smile she gave him was distant, almost distracted. “Oh, hey, Oscar,” she replied, her tone casual, as if he were just another guest at the party.
It stung, more than he cared to admit. “What’s going on? Missed anything exciting?” he asked, trying to keep the conversation light.
Y/N shrugged, her attention already shifting back to Jake. “Not really. Just hanging out.”
Oscar’s heart sank. This wasn’t like her. She was usually the first to pull him into the fun, to drag him into ridiculous games or tease him about not dancing enough. But now, it felt like he was intruding, like he didn’t belong.
The night went on, and the gap between them only seemed to widen. At one point, Oscar found himself standing near the bar, watching as Y/N and Jake danced together, completely absorbed in each other. It was as if the rest of the room had faded away, including him.
When they finally took a break, Oscar made his way over, hoping to at least steal a few minutes with her. “So, how’s it going with Jake?” he asked, trying to sound supportive despite the knot in his stomach.
Y/N looked at him with a small, polite smile, but there was no spark of excitement in her eyes, none of the usual fire that had always drawn him in. “It’s good. He’s great, really.”
“Yeah, he seems nice,” Oscar said, forcing the words out. “We should hang out more—like old times.”
She hesitated, her eyes flickering to Jake before she answered. “Yeah, maybe. We’ll see.”
That was it. Just a vague, noncommittal response that left Oscar feeling more isolated than ever.
The next few days were more of the same. Y/N started canceling plans, saying she was too busy or that she had already made plans with Jake. When they did hang out, she was distracted, constantly checking her phone, as if waiting for a message from Jake to pull her away again.
Oscar tried to hide his frustration, but it grew harder with each passing day. He noticed how Y/N seemed to change around Jake—she was more subdued, less like herself. The playful, confident girl he knew was replaced by someone who seemed almost… unsure. She laughed at jokes that weren’t funny, agreed with things she would usually argue against, and even started dressing differently, like she was trying to fit into some version of herself that wasn’t real.
The breaking point came when they all went out to another party, this time with a larger group. Oscar watched from a distance as Y/N and Jake mingled with people he didn’t recognize, her hand firmly in Jake’s as she introduced herself with an unfamiliar edge in her voice.
It wasn’t until someone asked how long she and Oscar had known each other that the real blow came.
“Oh, we’ve known each other for a while,” she said casually, almost dismissively, as if they weren’t best friends who had shared everything.
Oscar’s heart clenched painfully. He stood just a few feet away, and it felt like he’d been slapped in the face. A while? That was all she had to say about him? The countless nights they had spent talking until sunrise, the secrets they had shared, the times they had been there for each other through thick and thin—all reduced to “a while.”
For the rest of their time together, Oscar felt like a ghost, present but unseen, and the realization that Y/N barely noticed was what hurt the most. He couldn’t keep doing this, couldn’t keep pretending that everything was fine when it was far from it. He couldn’t stand it any longer. “I’m heading out,” he muttered to no one in particular, but Y/N didn’t even notice as he slipped out the door.
Later that night, Y/N texted him, asking if he got home okay. There was no apology, no acknowledgment of how she had brushed him aside. Just a casual check-in that felt more like an afterthought.
Oscar stared at the message, feeling a deep sadness settle in his chest. He had always known that Y/N was special to him, that she held a place in his heart no one else could ever fill. But now, he was starting to realize that she didn’t see him the same way—not anymore.
Maybe she never did, he thought bitterly, tossing his phone aside and sinking into bed, the weight of her neglect pressing down on him like a lead blanket. Maybe I’ve just been fooling myself this whole time.
end of flashback
And Oscar… he was hurting.
One evening, Y/N burst into Oscar's apartment with her usual energy. “Osc, you won’t believe it! We’re going on another date tonight—he’s taking me to this really cute café downtown!” Her voice was full of excitement, but Oscar barely heard her.
He was curled up on the couch, a familiar spot that once felt warm with her presence now felt cold and empty.
“That’s great,” he mumbled, his voice lacking its usual enthusiasm.
She frowned, finally noticing the difference. “What’s wrong? You’ve been weird lately.”
Oscar wanted to say it. He wanted to shout that he was tired of being pushed aside, tired of being the second choice. But instead, he just shook his head. “Nothing. I’m fine.”
Y/N wasn’t convinced. She moved closer, sitting beside him. “Oscar, talk to me. Please.”
Oscar looked at her, really looked at her, and felt his heart shatter a little more. He was losing her, and the worst part was that she didn’t even realize it. “I miss you,” he finally admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.
Y/N blinked, surprised. “I’m right here, O.”
“No, you’re not,” he replied, his tone sharper now. “You’ve been so wrapped up in your new relationship that I’ve barely seen you. You’re always with him, talking about him. And I… I’m just here, waiting for you to remember me.”
She frowned, her face softening as she reached out to touch his hand, but he pulled away. “Oscar, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize—”
“Of course you didn’t,” he interrupted, his frustration boiling over. “You didn’t realize because you’re happy, and I’m just… I’m just the friend who’ll always be there, right? The one you can ignore until you need him.”
Her eyes widened, hurt flashing across her face. “That’s not true, Oscar. You know you mean everything to me.”
“Do I?” he challenged, standing up and pacing the room. “Because it doesn’t feel like it, Y/N. It feels like I’m losing you, and it’s killing me.”
The air between them grew thick with tension, the kind that had never existed before. Y/N stood up too, tears welling in her eyes as she tried to reach out to him again. “Oscar, please don’t do this. I don’t want to lose you.”
“Then why does it feel like you’ve already left me?” he snapped, his voice breaking. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to keep his emotions in check but failing miserably. “You don’t get it, Y/N. You have no idea how much this hurts.”
“Then tell me!” she cried, her voice cracking with desperation. “Tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it!”
Oscar froze, the words caught in his throat. This was it. This was the moment he could tell her everything, but he couldn’t find the courage. Instead, he just shook his head, his eyes filled with unshed tears. “I can’t do this anymore.”
“Oscar, please don’t say that,” she whispered, stepping closer to him, but he stepped back, creating a distance between them that felt like miles.
“I love you,” he blurted out, his voice trembling. “I’ve loved you for so long, and I’ve tried to bury it, to just be your friend, but I can’t anymore. I can’t stand watching you with someone else. It’s killing me, Y/N.”
Her breath hitched, her eyes wide with shock. “Oscar… I… I didn’t know.”
“Of course, you didn’t,” he said bitterly, wiping away a tear that had escaped. “You didn’t know because I never told you. But now… now it’s too late. You’re with him, and I’m just… I’m nothing.”
Oscar’s voice trembled with a mix of anger and hurt as he stared at Y/N, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. He had tried to hold it in for so long, but the weight of her neglect was too much to bear, and now, it was all spilling out.
“You know, Y/N, I get that you’re excited about Jake. I really do. But do you even realize what you’ve been doing? Or should I say, what you haven’t been doing?” His voice was laced with bitterness, the words cutting through the air like a blade.
Y/N blinked, taken aback by the intensity in his voice. “Oscar, what are you talking about? I’ve just been—”
“No, don’t,” he cut her off sharply, shaking his head. “Don’t you dare try to brush this off like it’s nothing. You’ve been so wrapped up in your new relationship that you’ve completely forgotten about me. About us. Do you even remember the last time we had an actual conversation that wasn’t interrupted by you checking your phone? Or the last time we made plans that you didn’t cancel for Jake?”
Her mouth opened, but no words came out. She was struggling to process the raw emotion pouring out of him.
Oscar continued, his voice rising as the frustration he had been holding back for weeks finally broke free. “I’ve been your best friend for how long now? I’ve always been there for you, always. But ever since you started dating him, it’s like I don’t even exist anymore. You barely text me back, you cancel on me all the time, and when we do hang out, it’s like you’re not even here.”
He took a step closer, his eyes locked on hers, pleading for her to understand. “Do you have any idea how that feels? To go from being someone’s everything to feeling like you’re just… nothing? Like you’re just a placeholder until something better comes along?”
Y/N’s eyes filled with tears, but Oscar was too caught up in his own pain to notice. “I get that things change when you start dating someone, but you didn’t just change—you fucking disappeared. And I’m left here, trying to figure out where the hell my best friend went. The person I could always count on, who knew me better than anyone… she’s gone.”
His voice cracked, the anger giving way to the deep hurt he had been carrying. “And you know what’s worse? I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. But I was too scared to say anything because I didn’t want to mess things up. I didn’t want to lose you. But now… it feels like I’ve lost you anyway.”
Y/N’s breath hitched as she took a step back, her heart pounding in her chest. She had never seen Oscar like this, so raw and vulnerable, and it terrified her.
“I tried to be happy for you,” Oscar continued, his voice quieter now, filled with a deep sadness. “I tried to convince myself that I could just be your friend and that would be enough. But it’s not enough, Y/N. Not when you treat me like I’m nothing.”
He looked away, blinking back the tears that threatened to fall. “I thought I meant more to you than this. I thought we meant more. But maybe I was wrong.”
Y/N’s heart shattered at the sight of him, at the pain in his eyes. She reached out to him, desperate to hold him, to comfort him, but he pulled away again, shaking his head.
“I can’t be around you right now,” Oscar said, his voice broken. “I need time… I need to figure out how to stop loving you.”
“Oscar, please don’t go,” she begged, tears streaming down her face. “We can talk about this—”
But Oscar had already turned away, grabbing his keys and heading for the door. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I just… I can’t.”
With that, he left, leaving Y/N standing in the middle of the room, her heart aching with the weight of what had just happened. She sank to the floor, sobs wracking her body as she realized that the one person she needed most was the one she had pushed away.
And Oscar, driving aimlessly through the city, felt more alone than he ever had in his entire life, knowing that he had finally spoken his truth, but at what cost?
time skip
Y/N was left alone in the apartment, her mind reeling from everything Oscar had said. As the door slammed shut behind him, she crumpled to the floor, her chest tightening with an overwhelming sense of loss. The tears came in uncontrollable waves, each sob tearing through her as she gasped for breath.
How did I not see this? she thought, her mind racing. How could I be so blind?
She buried her face in her hands, the memories flooding back—every moment they had shared, every laugh, every hug, every time Oscar had been there for her, and she had taken it all for granted. They played like a cruel montage in her mind, the pieces finally falling into place.
I’ve always loved him, she realized, the truth hitting her like a punch to the gut. But I was too scared… too scared of losing him, of ruining everything.
She thought back to every time they had cuddled on the couch, his arms wrapped around her, making her feel safe and warm. She had always known there was something more between them, something unspoken, but she had pushed it down, terrified of what it would mean if she acknowledged it. Because if I lost Oscar… I’d lose everything.
Her phone was in her hand before she even realized it, her fingers trembling as she dialed his number. Each ring felt like an eternity, the silence on the other end growing heavier with every passing second.
Voicemail.
“Hey, this is Oscar. I'm probably driving really fast or I'm not in the mood. Anyway I’ll get back to you.”
The beep echoed in her ears, and she quickly hung up, her heart pounding as panic set in. She dialed again, desperately hoping he would pick up this time, that she could tell him everything she was feeling before it was too late. But once again, it went to voicemail.
“Oscar, please,” she whispered to herself, her voice shaking as she redialed, only to be met with the same message. Each time the voicemail beeped, she hung up, feeling the hope drain out of her.
Finally, after the fifth failed attempt, she couldn’t hold it in any longer. The voicemail beeped, and she began to speak, her voice thick with tears.
“Oscar, it’s me. Please, please, just listen to this… I—I’m so sorry,” she started, her voice breaking. “I’m sorry I didn’t see it, sorry I didn’t realize how much I was hurting you. I’ve been so selfish, so blind, and I didn’t even notice what I was doing to you.”
She paused, trying to steady her breathing, but the tears kept coming. “I… I’m terrified, Oscar. I’ve always been terrified of losing you, of messing this up, of losing the best thing in my life. And that’s why I never… I never let myself feel what I was feeling. I thought if I pretended it wasn’t there, we could stay the same forever.”
Her voice cracked as she continued, the words tumbling out in a desperate rush. “But I do love you, Oscar. I love you so much it hurts. And the thought of losing you… of you walking out of my life… I can’t bear it. I was so scared that if I admitted how I felt, everything would change, and I’d lose you forever. But now I realize… I was losing you anyway.”
She choked on a sob, pressing a hand to her mouth as she tried to hold herself together. “Please, Oscar, don’t shut me out. I know I messed up, I know I hurt you, but I need you to know that you mean everything to me. You always have. And I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, that I didn’t see it until now.”
Y/N wiped at her tears, her voice trembling as she spoke the final words. “Please, Oscar, don’t walk away. I love you… I love you so much, and I’m begging you to give me a chance to make this right. Please… please don’t leave me.”
The message ended, the silence that followed felt deafening. Y/N let the phone slip from her hand, her body shaking with sobs as she curled up on the floor, consumed by the fear that it might be too late, that she might have lost him for good.
Please, Oscar, come back to me.
time skip
Oscar sat on a bench near the parking lot, his car parked a few meters away. The night was quiet, save for the occasional rustle of leaves in the wind. His heart felt heavy, his mind spinning with everything that had just happened. He didn’t know where to go, or what to do, so he just sat there, staring blankly into the distance, replaying their fight over and over again in his mind.
His phone buzzed in his pocket, breaking through his thoughts. He pulled it out, seeing Y/N’s name flash on the screen with a voicemail notification. His thumb hovered over the play button for a moment, hesitant. Part of him didn’t want to hear what she had to say, afraid it would only hurt him more. But another part, the part that had loved her for so long, needed to know.
With a deep breath, he pressed play.
As Y/N’s voice filled the air, raw with emotion and thick with tears, Oscar’s heart clenched. Each word she spoke was like a dagger, cutting deeper into the hurt he was already feeling, but there was something else too—something that made his breath catch in his throat.
“I… I’m terrified, Oscar. I’ve always been terrified of losing you, of messing this up, of losing the best thing in my life. And that’s why I never… I never let myself feel what I was feeling. I thought if I pretended it wasn’t there, we could stay the same forever.”
He closed his eyes, letting her words wash over him. He could hear the desperation in her voice, the regret, the love she had been too scared to admit. It mirrored everything he had felt for so long, everything he had been too afraid to say.
Tears stung at the corners of his eyes as the message continued, her confession unfolding in a way he had never imagined but had always longed for. The voicemail ended with her pleading, the words echoing in his mind, “Please, Oscar, don’t walk away. I love you… I love you so much, and I’m begging you to give me a chance to make this right. Please… please don’t leave me.”
He sat there, stunned, the silence that followed almost unbearable. He played the message again, needing to hear it one more time to believe it was real. As Y/N’s voice replayed, full of vulnerability and love, something shifted inside him. The anger he had felt earlier began to melt away, replaced by a deep, aching love that had never gone away.
Just as the message ended for the second time, Oscar became aware of a presence behind him. He turned around slowly and saw Y/N standing a few feet away, her face pale and tear-streaked, her eyes wide with uncertainty. She must have found him while he was listening to the voicemail, and now she stood there, silent, waiting.
For a moment, neither of them said anything. The weight of the situation hung between them, both of them trying to process what had just happened. Finally, Oscar broke the silence, his voice soft and tentative.
“You… you really mean that?” he asked, his gaze locking onto hers, searching for any sign that this was all some kind of cruel joke.
Y/N nodded, her voice trembling as she spoke. “Every word, Oscar. I mean it. I’ve been so scared of ruining what we had that I didn’t realize I was ruining it by pushing you away. But I do love you. I’ve loved you for so long, and I’m so, so sorry it took me this long to realize it.”
Oscar stood up, taking a hesitant step toward her. “I didn’t want to lose you either,” he admitted, his voice thick with emotion. “I thought if I kept my feelings to myself, we could just keep going the way we were. But it was killing me, Y/N. Watching you with Jake… it felt like I was losing you, and I didn’t know how to stop it.”
Y/N took a shaky breath, stepping closer until they were just inches apart. “You were never going to lose me, Oscar. You’re my best friend, and you always will be. But… I want more than that. I need more than that. I love you, and I want to be with you, if you’ll have me.”
Oscar’s eyes softened, the pain of the past weeks slowly fading as he looked at her, really looked at her, and saw everything he had ever wanted. “Of course I’ll have you,” he said, his voice breaking slightly. “I’ve wanted that for so long, Y/N. I love you too, more than anything. I just… I didn’t think you felt the same.”
She smiled through her tears, reaching out to take his hand. “I do, Oscar. I’m sorry it took me so long to see it, to admit it. But I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”
Oscar pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly as if he was afraid she might slip away if he let go. “I don’t want to lose you,” he whispered into her hair, his voice filled with relief and love.
“You won’t,” Y/N whispered back, burying her face in his chest. “I’m not going anywhere, Oscar. I’m right here, and I’m not letting you go.”
They stood there in the quiet night, wrapped in each other’s arms, the weight of unspoken words finally lifted. It wasn’t going to be easy, but they had each other, and that was all that mattered. In that moment, they both knew they had found something worth fighting for, something that had always been there, waiting for them to finally see it.
821 notes · View notes
reidsdimples · 5 months ago
Text
Feverish- 2
Spencer Reid x Reader
18+❤️‍🔥 MDNI‼️
Part 1
Spencer’s inhibitions are still lowered which causes him to escalate things in the shower
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You startle awake as Spencer flips over the side of your bed and pukes. You’re still pinned beneath him, his full weight on your legs. So you scrunch your nose and attempt to hold his hair back.
An awful groan escapes him along with a mumbled apology.
“I’m going to move you off of me so I don’t throw up on you and make this worse,” you say gently and help him roll to the other side of the bed.
At least he got into the small trash can you placed there.
Once you dispose of it you return to check on him, the two of you only having been asleep for about four hours. The sun had set and you figured you should attempt to give him more medicine.
Fumbling around in your cabinet you locate some drowsy flu and cold medicine that you didn’t realize you had.
You whip up some soup and grab him a Gatorade before padding back into your bedroom. He’s approached that level if misery where all he can do is lay there and groan in pain. It was awful to watch, Spencer was usually so calm and put together. In the six months you dated, you never saw him sick.
His eyes flutter open when you sit next to him and he pulls himself to a sitting position.
“You have to try to eat something so I can give you the medicine. I put ginger in the soup to help your stomach,” he nods. His hands are shaking so you opt to spoon feed him slowly.
Between bites you feel his forehead to discover he’s still burning up. You frown at him sympathetically. He definitely had the same awful flu you had two weeks ago. No doubt about it.
“Water, the sports drink will dehydrate me more without water in my system,” he says when you try to give him the Gatorade.
“Okay,” you bring his glass of water to his lips and he takes it down greedily. His hands linger on yours against the glass for a moment and he meets your eyes.
“Here,” you hand him the dose of the liquid medicine.
He scoots away from it.
“No pills? I hate the liquid,” he whines.
“No, you have to take this now. I’ll get you the pills tomorrow,” you grab his chin and turn his face back towards the medicine. “Don’t make me force this down your throat. I will,” you threaten.
He knows you’re serious, so he takes it throws it down before chasing it with water.
He only took a few bites of soup but it would have to do.
You help him back under the covers and place a thermometer under his tongue. You needed a true reading to monitor his progress.
“103.2 F,” you tell him. “You’re bad off.”
He nods in agreement.
“Drink this,” you give him orange juice with an immune boosting shot in it. “After this you can go back to sleep,” you promise him.
He looks so tired, so sick, that it makes your heart hurt.
“Stay with me,” he pleads.
“I’m not going anywhere Spence,” you place a hand on his face and brush his hair behind his ear. He gives you a thankful smile. “Just keep your tissues on your side of the bed,” you grimace at his now growing pile.
He smiles softly before groaning like it hurts.
-
He wakes some hours later with at least some clarity in his eyes. He’s on his face when he lifts up to look at you. He smiles sheepishly before groaning and rolling onto his back.
“You smell awful, you were sweating morning your sleep,” you place the book in your lap and look down at him.
“Sorry,” he mumbles.
You make him take his temperature.
“101.8 F, better,” you show him.
He throws his head back on the headboard and runs his hands through his long hair with a sigh.
You look for signs about whether or not he remembers kissing you so desperately the day before. He gives none.
“Let’s get you in the shower,” you pop up.
He doesn’t protest and he’s able to walk, albeit slowly to the bathroom on his own. He sways as if his head spins but he’s able to brush his teeth. You’re grateful for that.
He leans with he’s head on the wall as he scrubs his tongue, clearly getting up is taking a toll on him.
“I made sure it’s not too warm,” you tell him after turning on the shower head.
He looks between you and the shower expectantly.
“What?” You ask.
“Aren’t you going to leave so I can take these off?” He asks, some humor in his tone.
“I’m not leaving you to your own devices. I’ve seen you naked, it’s fine Spencer,” you reason with him.
“But-“
“Not up for debate, you’re not falling and dying in my shower. Now come on,” you tug his arm towards you.
He doesn’t catch himself as quickly as he should be able to and barrels into you. You’re pinned between him and the wall when he places his hands on the wall on either side of your head to stead himself.
His mouth is partially open, he has no choice since he can’t breathe out of his nose. But somehow that mixed with his shirtlessness and messy hair is driving you crazy.
You hook your index fingers into the front of his boxers, pulling him closer to you in an attempt to break his eye contact.
“Lose these and get in the shower, Spence,” you whisper. He nods and obeys.
You move into the shower behind him. He’s leaning on the wall with his arms holding him up, his head dropped between his them as the water flushes all of his hair over his face. You take in the muscles in his lean back, his ass…
Then he turns to you. His eyes are heavy again, his breathing labored. He looks like hell.
You bring a new loofah between you and add soap. He reaches for it but you snatch it away. His eyes can’t help but to move over your wet naked body. You begin to move it over his chest, making slow circles until the soap lathers. You get his arms and move to his stomach. He seems to be getting closer to you.
He grabs your hand with the loofah before you trail down further, his eyes wide. You can see his arousal between his legs despite him feeling terrible.
You let him take the loofah and he turns you around and pulls you close. He wraps his arms around you. His tall lean frame, partially depending on you to keep him standing.
He squeezes out the loofah over your breasts and massages it down between them, his other hand gripping your left tit. His strong arms are wrapped around you as his hands start to cover you in soap. He’s slow and teasing about it.
You can feel his cock pressing upwards against your ass, a small groan escaping him.
You turn to him and make him take a step backward so that the water runs over you both. He watches you, unsure.
You pour more body wash in your hand and place in flat against his stomach, letting it run down over his hardened cock. You push him to lean against the wall. The coldness of the stone causes him to wince but he doesn’t care.
“Ah,” he moans when you wrap your hand around him.
“Would this make you feel better?” You whisper. He swallows hard and nods frantically.
“I need you so bad,” he whimpers.
You pump him slowly, dragging your hand and tightening it around him.
He leans forward on a moan when you speed up, he drops his head to the crook of your neck and begins kissing and sucking on your skin.
It doesn’t slow you down, you tighten and twist your hand just how he likes it until his leaning on you with his hands gripping your ass. The water falls over both of you, heating your body.
He twitches and moans, his knees getting weaker in his sickened state.
“Please,” he whines and takes your face in his hands.
His forehead is against yours as he pants for air.
“Ah,” he groans.
He drops his head to kiss your breasts as his cock begins to pulse. He shudders and you pump him harder until his hot cum is shooting outward. He grips your hips and slowly lowers himself to his knees before you.
He presses his face against your stomach, kissing and moaning, worshiping you. You take in the sight of him. Half out of it, half panting with satisfaction.
Unexpectedly though, he keeps kissing and sucking on your skin until his mouth trails down to your pussy. He looks up at you through the splashing water as if pleading to taste you. You nod.
He’s not gentle about it and he doesn’t take his time. Probably because he feels awful. But you don’t mind.
He leans his face up and burries it into you, his tongue trailing between your folds. He latches onto your pussy and sucks and licks frantically. You push your hands into his hair, spreading your legs to angel him just right.
“Yes baby,” you moan.
This beautiful man on his knees before you looked like a god with his soaked mane of hair. He was breathtaking as his eyes fluttered closed and he devoured you. He moaned into your pussy as he enjoyed feasting on everything you had to offer.
His nails dug into the flesh of your ass, urging you to grind on his face.
You oblige, screaming out at the intense sensation.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you pant as you ride his face. He continues sucking on your clit and pushing his tongue into your entrance.
It’s so good, your legs start to shake and the world blurs. He doesn’t let up and you think he must be exhausted. But he wants to please you. He’s always been like that.
“Spencer!” You scream as your orgasm ravishes you. Your pussy clenches and pulses as he sucks down your cum. It’s like he’s starving the way he does it.
You try to focus your eyes on him, you can’t believe he just did that.
He pulls his knees out from under him and sits back against the shower wall.
He closes eyes as and you can see them shifting behind his eyelids.
“Are you okay?” You crouch down in front of him.
“Dizzy,” he whispers.
“You shouldn’t have… we shouldn’t have,” you start to apologize. He shushes you.
“Don’t say that,” he urges weakly and shivers.
“Oh Spence,” you feel so bad. You weren’t even thinking. Clearly he wasn’t either.
You wrap a bath towel around him and help him up.
Once he’s dried off you get him back into bed and add an extra layer of blankets. Even in his sickened daze his eyes follow you around the room because you’re still naked.
“Here,” you make him take the medicine he hates along with a fever reducer.
“No more of that,” you gesture at the bathroom.
“What about when I’m better?” He grins. Your cheeks turn red and you can’t help but to smile.
“Just sleep, Spencer,” you lean over and kiss his forehead.
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holdmytesseract · 2 months ago
Note
Dad-to-be!Daryl fighting tooth and nail to keep the reader—who’s water had broken while they were on a walking around in the Hilltop—safe while trying to get her back to Alexandria so that Siddiq and Carol can help with the delivery of their little one. (Plus maybe the post-delivery fluff that ensues when Daryl and reader get their first moments alone with their baby.)
No pressure to write this! I just saw your post asking for dad!Daryl requests and had this idea, and thought I’d throw it your way. Love you whether you write this or not. 💜
In the Eye of the Storm
Daryl Dixon x fem!Reader
Summary: You go into labor while staying at the renewed Sanctuary. Daryl has to safely get you back home to Alexandria, of course - through a thunderstorm...
Warnings: usual TWD stuff, pregnancy, childbirth, baby things, mentions of blood, weapons, quite a bit angst, fluff, protective!Daryl
I tried to write this as accurate as possible. I'm no expert, heh.
Set in the beginning of season 9!
Word Count: 4,5k (whoops)
a/n: I'm not kidding when I say that I literally pounced that request. Gods, I loved to write this! Thanks for requesting, @dixons-sunshine ! I hope I did this justice! 🥹
EoH Masterlist °☆• Daryl Masterlist °☆• Masterlist
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Daryl had a critical gaze directed at the darkening sky above him. The wind had picked up; bringing dark clouds over the Sanctuary. A thunderstorm was approaching - and fast.
Unbeknownst to him, had the archer started to chew on the inside of his bottom lip; causing you to gently squeeze his side. "Earth to Mr. Dixon," you giggled; trying to get his attention. "You okay, Dar?" The archer blinked and lowered his gaze back to you - his wife, who was neatly tucked against his side on a walk through the yard of the renewed Sanctuary; past the not yet growing crops which had been planted. You smiled up at him - slightly grimaced, but you smiled. He shook his head; "I shoulda been askin' you tha', sunshine..." eyes drifting to your prominent baby bump. You took a deep breath, but nodded. "Just Braxton Hicks, you know..."
Daryl's eyes drifted from your eyes to your (yet) unborn baby and back; a mix of worry and fear swimming in his blue-greyish orbs. You could tell. "Ya been havin' them already the whole day... Since we got up this mornin'. Ya sure this ain't the real thing?" Now you were the one shaking your head. "No. I promise, we're okay." "A'righ'." The archer jutted his chin towards the factory and looked back up in the sky. "Let's get ya back inside," he prompted and gave your hip a soft squeeze, before he started to walk; urging you on to follow. You nodded and scrunched your nose. "Yeah... Looks like rain."
With the first roll of thunder, Daryl closed the door behind you and him, without his hand leaving your body for even a second. He was so adamant to always be by your side; steady you and help you walk, it was ridiculously cute. It made you fall in love with the archer even more - not knowing it was even possible.
You giggled; one hand on the small of your back, the other on top of your belly. "Babe, you know I can stand on my own, right?" "Don care. Want ya close. 'Specially round 'ere... Ain't trustin' 'em..." You knew of course what he meant. The smile on your face immediately vanished; replaced by a concerned frown.
You understood Rick's intention; wanting to make Carl's last wish true. You'd do the same for your own child - within a heartbeat. You just didn't understand why Rick had charged Daryl of all people with the supervision of the Sanctuary. Sure, he was his bother, his right-hand-man, the one he possibly trusted most besides Michonne, but... After everything Daryl has been through here? After all the psychological torture? You knew it wasn't easy for your husband to be here. Even though he didn't say anything. You could feel it.
You took a step towards the archer; invading his space. Placing a hand on his chest and the other on his cheek, you scanned his face. "Daryl... You... You shouldn't be here. You shouldn't be the one having to do this. I'll have a-" You stopped dead in your sentence; eyes widening and heart leaping into your throat at the feeling you had just experienced. Daryl was immediately on alert; completely ignoring what you had just said. "Y/N?! Wha's goin' on?!" His free hand came to rest on the bump which was his child instantly.
You swallowed hard; taking a step away from him again and looked down yourself. A prominent wet patch was spreading across the crotch and inner thighs of your maternity sweatpants. "I-I think..." Your husband's eyes followed yours quick; realisation dawning on him right away. It could mean only two things...
1) You peed yourself.
Or
2) Your water broke.
The archer begged internally to whatever force above that it was not the latter. "Please tell me ya peed yerself..." Daryl mumbled under his shaky breath; already slightly on edge. It wasn't a fortunate moment for the baby to make their appearance... You were at the Sanctuary, for God's sake! Rosita and Eugene were the only one here you could truly trust. Not much medical supplies and even less people who knew how to birth a baby either.
"I-I'm honestly not sure, Dar..." He nodded; trying to keep his calm. "A'right. Let's, uh, get ya in a fresh pair of pants 'n check?" "Uh.Huh," you answered; nervously nibbling on your lip as well. You actually didn't want to 'do this to Daryl' now, but it wasn't like you could take a pick. It wasn't in your hands... It was in the tiny hands of the peanut living in your belly.
You felt your husband's strong arm around your waist once again; supporting you as best as he could and helping you to walk through the darkish, grey hallways of the 'former' enemies hideout and towards your shared room.
After the sweatpants and your panties were not much longer on your body, you and Daryl realised quickly that you did certainly not pee yourself. It was a different... substance - which meant the one thing the both of you hoped it wouldn't be... Your water broke.
"O-Oh, fuck, that's..." You cut off your own sentence; "W-What are we, uh, going to do now?" swallowing hard and balancing on one foot, while you gripped Daryl's shoulder as he helped you step inside a fresh pair of underwear and sweatpants.
The archer looked up at you; panic swimming in his blue-grey orbs. You could tell that his mind was working on overdrive to find an answer to your question. "I-I dunno, sunshine, I-" He inhaled a deep breath; eyes darting around the room. "Ya can't have the peanut here... 'S no doctor 'round. I ain't risking tha'..." Daryl shook his head and stood up; palms immediately lading on your hips. "W-We gotta get ya back to Alexandria. To Siddiq. Now." You nodded; clenching your jaw at the incoming contraction - and Daryl noticed, of course. "'N we gotta time 'em contractions. C'mon."
Trusting your husband and his decision making blindly, you quickly threw a few things you might needed in Daryl's beige backpack, while he was informing Rosita about the situation you found yourself in.
It didn't take the archer more than a few minutes to return to your side; giving you a helping hand and finally walking you back to the door, which led to the yard - but once he opened it, a harsh breeze hit him (and you) instantly; rain splattering across your faces.
Fuck... The thunderstorm... Daryl had totally forgotten about the weather conditions; too occupied with you and the baby. You did, too.
"Fuckin' shit," the archer cursed under his breath; trying to shield you from the rain with his broad body. "Well, that's gonna be a fun car ride, eh?" You halfway joked; trying to lift the mood, but without success. "I'll get the truck; park as close as somehow possible. No matter wha'... We have ta get ya back home."
The Sanctuary had borrowed a truck from the Hilltop for moving things and other 'heavy' stuff. It was the only car option Daryl got. Of course he couldn't take his bike. Hell no.
"Ya wait inside. Don want ya ta get wet 'n cold." You nodded; bracing yourself beside the door against the wall. "Ya good bein' alone?" Once again you nodded; giving him another half-smile. "Go." He gave you a last once over, before he stepped out in the rain to get the truck.
Soaked to the bones, he helped you down the stairs then and outside; sitting you in the passenger seat of the truck; not letting go of you for even a second. "Y-You're soaked, baby..." You noticed with a furrowed brow; concerned. "You'll catch a cold if you-" Your husband immediately interrupted you; shaking his head and squeezing your hand. "Doesn't matter. This ain't 'bout me. 'S 'bout ya 'n the baby."
You knew that arguing would be just a waste of time. It wouldn't help. And honestly were you way too tensed and stressed to discuss. So you said nothing.
"Ya comfortable, sunshine? Tha' okay fer now?" His voice was on edge. You could see how hard he was trying to not lose it. This spurred you even more on to keep a cool head yourself. After all, this was your first birth. Your first child. You wanted to panic and give into the nervousness, concern and fear, but you knew you couldn't. You had to try at least. For Daryl.
You nodded and gave him a soft smile. "Y-Yeah, I- We're good, I-I think. Thanks, babe." The small smile he gave you was sloshing over with nervosity and concern, but he tried as well.
Daryl quickly rounded the car and got inside the driver's seat; immediately starting the engine. "Let's get ya home." He started to drive, while you tried to focus on your breathing like Carol taught you. Both your hands splayed on your big baby bump; feeling the subtle movements of the child within you.
Some time passed until the next contraction hit you. You breathed through it; grimacing. "Damnit..." You gasped once the waves of pain subsided; noticing how Daryl gazed back and forth between a watch around his wrist you never saw before and the street. "Been 'bout forty minutes since the last one." You swallowed hard. "T-That's already quite close, isn't it?" He shrugged his shoulder. "I dunno, but... Feels like it." You shifted slightly in your seat and placed a hand on Daryl's hand, which was gripping the gear shift for dear life. "We're gonna make it, 'kay? Everything's gonna be okay," you tried to reassure Daryl - and yourself. You could see how he chewed on his bottom lip. "Shouldn't 'ave taken ya with me... Shoulda left ya back home where ya 'n the baby 'r safe 'n taken care of. Hell, I shouldn't 'ave left at all... 'S my fault tha' we gotta do this now."
You immediately shook your head and gave his hand another squeeze. "Dar, this is everything, but your fault. I was the one encouraging you to go... And I practically begged you to take me along, because I can't stand to be away from you - especially now. I knew the risk, but I made the decision. If anyone's to blame, it's me." Your husband just scoffed at your words and just as he actually wanted to answer, the sight of the street a few miles ahead forced him to stop the truck.
The thunderstorm hadn't calmed down in the slightest; was raging on and had caused a tree to fall and land in the middle of the street. "Shit... 'S too big ta move it... We have ta take a different road." His eyes landed on you, just like his hand on your swollen belly. "Can ya both hang on a lil' while longer? 'S a stupid question, ain't it?" You shook your head and gave him the most convincing smile you could muster in that moment. "It's not. I-I'll try... Right, peanut?" You addressed your unborn baby. "We'll try."
Unfortunately wasn't the fallen tree the only obstacle you had to overcome on your rushed journey to Alexandria... The storm was going on and definitely took its toll on the nature. And that wasn't the only problem... The night had settled over the world and the dead weren't exactly a help as well, and at some point were your contractions only fifteen minutes apart... It was a race against the time now - and your upcoming nerves. The closer you got to actually birthing your child, the worse it became. Fifteen minutes apart and you didn't even know if everything was fine and going the way it should down there. It was excruciating.
"Sonofabitch," you suddenly heard Daryl exclaim, which snapped you out of your thoughts. Lifting your gaze, you instantly understood what caused his small outburst... A few walkers were exactly in your way; stuck in the rain soaked, muddy ground. "Have ta get rid of 'em, sunshine," Daryl stated and already moved to unsheathe his knives from their confines; his barely dried clothes about to get soaked all over again. "I-I can help-" "Hell nah," he cut you off immediately; scoffing. "Yer stayin' right here inside the truck where ya 'r safe. I ain't riskin' a damn thing. Gotta keep ya safe." You nodded in defeat; realising once more that arguing wouldn't get you anywhere.
Daryl gave you a stern but loving look, before he took a deep breath and exited the truck. Anxiously, you watched your husband fighting off the undead threat. Sure, most of them were kinda stuck, but the noises had attracted more walkers... The headlights of the truck provided enough light for you to see what was going on in front of you, but not besides and certainly not behind the vehicle. The relentless rain made it difficult to see straight as well, and when another, much worse contraction hit you and the pain managed to blur your vision entirely, you lost sight of Daryl. Sweat was dripping over your brow as you couldn't hold back the scream which wanted to break free from your lips; hands clutching your baby bump. "O-Oh f-fuck..." Your fingers clenched into fists as you tried to breathe through the contraction. Agonisingly slow subsided the pain; leaving you breathless. You looked around through the windows; trying to find your husband. But you couldn't see him. It was quiet. Except for the running engine and the rain drumming down on the truck.
"D-Daryl?!" You called out; knowing very well that he couldn't hear you. Uneasiness crept up in you; threatening to cut off your airways and sent your anxiety skyrocketing. It didn't help that you were on edge already... What if something happened to him? What if he got bit? What if he...? Your brain already conjured the worst case scenarios, as suddenly two pale hands slammed against the window pane beside you; the tow curling growl almost giving you a heart attack. "Fucking hell!" You squeaked and clutched your now rapidly beating heart.
The hands clawed and scratched at the wet glass - but to your sheer endless relief didn't they stay long. With a dull thud hit the undead man's skull the window; blood splattering everywhere, before it got slowly washed away. The hands stilled, before they entirely disappeared. Blinking, you watched it happen, still somewhat caught up in your thoughts. But then, the driver's door got opened and slammed quickly shut again. A familiar grunt urged to your ears - and you could've cried of relief and happiness.
"Daryl!" You more or less whimpered; shifting in your seat as good as you could and turned to him; taking in his water and blood soaked appearance. Some blood was on his cheeks and water dripped down his long, brown hair. You reached for him; grabbed onto his wet sweatshirt and slippery vest. "A-Are you okay? I-I lost sight of you a-and..." You hiccuped; taking a deep breath. The archer immediately nodded and leaned in for a sweet, soft kiss; letting you feel that he was alive and well, before he moved to take your hands in his bigger ones. "'M good, sunshine. 'S a'right. 'M here." His blue eyes scanned your body then; lips pressed together in worry. "Wha' 'bout you?"
You swallowed hard. "H-Had another contraction..." His eyes widened. "Darlin', you had one barely ten minutes ago..." "I know." Daryl looked at you a few moments longer, before he gently let go of your hands and gripped the steering wheel instead. "We gotta keep movin'," he mumbled and kept on driving - and you knew he was right.
Luckily the truck didn't get stuck in the muddy mess ahead of you... That would've been the cherry on top.
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It took you longer than planned to drive back to Alexandria, but in the end you finally made it - most likely just in time. You swore you were never that happy before to see the familiar gates of the place you called home. Daryl felt the same. You could tell.
The thunder and lighting had ceased by now. It was still raining, but not as bad. Due to the bad weather conditions was nobody on watch, but the archer knew that at least one person was positioned up in the windmill; looking out for threats from up there. So, he gave whoever was up there a sign; flashing the truck head lights three times and signalling that friends were standing in front of the walls and not enemies.
"Jus' a few minutes longer, sunshine. Almost there," Daryl tried to reassure you as he gently squeezed your hand. You just nodded; occupied with taking deep breaths.
Moments later, the gates got opened for Daryl to drive through, which he immediately did and headed straight for the infirmary; parking the car as close as he could get.
The approaching headlights must've caught Siddiq's attention, since the doctor immediately went to the door; trying to catch a glimpse of what was going on. He watched the archer quickly rounding the vehicle; getting soaked in the rain a third time. "Daryl?!" Siddiq called out; switching on his porch light. "What-" Daryl didn't let the man finish; cut him off mid sentence as he opened the door and helped you out. "Need yer help! Y/N's in labor!"
Siddiq didn't need more information. He knew and was immediately on high alert. The doctor opened the door and let the both of you in; instantly helping Daryl to steady you. Usually, he would've asked about your condition, but Siddiq knew the moment he saw you. "How far apart are the contractions?" You wanted to answer, but Daryl did for you. "'Bout six minutes." The black haired man nodded, "You got here just in time, I'd say." and helped you sit on the bed inside the room he had led you and Daryl in. "I'm afraid we have to get you out of these..." Siddiq nodded at your sweatpants. "Daryl, would you...?" Your husband's eyes were locked on you as he nodded slowly. "Yeah, I got it. C'mon, sunshine."
While Daryl helped you shimmy down your pants and panties, Siddiq prepared some things he needed in the upcoming hour(s)... Towels, gloves and some other medical stuff.
"Alright. I have to check on you. Is that alright?" Siddiq asked carefully; knowing how... protective and territorial the other present man in the room could get. You nodded; trying your hardest to not scream due to the contraction you were going through. The doctor noticed and placed a reassuring hand on your knee. "Deep breaths, Y/N. We got this, okay?" You gave your friend another nod, before he went to check as soon as your contraction subsided again.
"You're about eight centimetres dilated, I'd say." "'N tha' means?" Daryl spoke up with your hand neatly tucked in his, as he was standing by your side. "Two more and she'll be able to start pushing. Means, your baby will see the light of day in the next one or two hours." The colour visibly drained from the archer's face. He knew that he'd be a dad soon, but... That soon? You, on the contrary just groaned and threw your head against the pillow. "Thank fuck. I want this to be over... Hurts like a bitch - and I finally want to hold my baby."
Siddiq witnessed both very different reactions and tried to hide a smile; quickly deciding to give the soon-to-be-dad a little task to keep him from freaking out.
"Daryl?" The archer's gaze lifted from where he was staring at the floor and gnawing nervously on his thumb. "Could you get Carol? I might need her assistance." Daryl frowned in confusion, but the feeling which started to flood his veins was happiness. "She's here?" Siddiq nodded with a smile. "Yes. She was on the road and decided to stay for a few days. Might as well call it providence." The man nodded; shaking a few bangs of wild brown curls from his face and nibbled on his bottom lip again, but turned to you; needing your permission. "'S a'right if I go 'n get 'er, darlin'?" You nodded; sweat doting your forehead. "As long as you'll come back to me... Go. I'm in good hands." Your husband gave you a loving look and gently squeezed your hand, before he let go to get himself soaked in rain again - for the nth time... Not that he cared, though.
The archer didn't even had to ask where to look for his best friend. He knew. After all has she been sharing a house with the both of you, before she moved to the Kingdom. Where else to look but there
Opening the main door, he stepped inside; calling out for his friend. "Carol?!" It didn't take long for the grey haired woman to peak out from the kitchen in the hallways; frowning. The frown immediately vanished, though, when she saw who the 'intruder' was... "Daryl?" A bright smile darted over her face, as she quickly bridged the distance to hug her best friend. They hadn't seen each other in a while after all.
"Ya good?" He simply asked; definitely enjoying the embrace of the woman he got luckily stuck with since the very beginning of this shit show. "Yeah, I am. What about you? And especially Y/N?" Daryl instantly retreated from the hug; a frightening, but also happy look on his face. "W-Well, uh... S-She's in labor. 'S why I brought 'er back here... Siddiq sent me ta ask for yer help..." Carol's eyes widened, but she immediately scrambled for the kitchen to turn off the stove. "Of course, I'm coming to help! Can't miss my best friend becoming a daddy, can I?"
Daryl blinked. "Best friend? Really?" Carol ignored his sceptical question and grabbed him by the shoulders instead; turning him around and maneuvering him towards the door. There were more important things to do now than discuss that.
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Siddiq's predictions had been quite on spot. About one and an half hour, quite a few painful contractions and several tiring and debilitating pushes later, you finally held your baby in your arms. Since the doctor's announcement that you gave birth to a - as far as he could tell, healthy little girl, Daryl's mind had gone blank. He was physically present, but mentally, he was somewhere lost in a haze; trying to process the life-changing information... A girl. His daughter. He was a father now. A father!
Of course, you noticed. Carol and Siddiq did, too and all of you decided to give him the space and time he needed right now; just letting him stare at the white wall across your bed.
Only once the afterbirth was done, you getting cleaned up as well as the baby, the umbilical cord cut by Carol (Daryl would've most likely fainted if he was asked to do it. He already looked as white as a ghost...), a few further instructions and information shared by both your friends, and your newborn daughter wrapped up in a diaper and a slightly too big beige romper suit with cute teddy bears on it, you decided to try to guide your husband out of the haze he still was in. Especially now that you were given some time alone...
"Daryl?" You called out softly; voice barely above a whisper to not startle him. He didn't react, so you tried again... Same result. Freeing a hand from the baby tucked against your chest, you reached out to gently touch his arm. "Babe..." You whispered; letting your palm glide down the length of the limb and brushing the clammy skin of his hand. "Hey..." That seemed to finally do the trick...
The archer blinked and redirected his glance; eyes focusing on you instead. "'M sorry, sunshine, I-" His words quickly died in his throat, when he finally saw his daughter nestled against you; greedily suckling on your exposed right breast and making the cutest little noises he had ever heard. You smiled tiredly and slipped your fingers through his; giving them a soft squeeze. "Your baby girl, Daryl... Your daughter..." He swallowed and lifted his free hand; almost hesitatingly hovering over the infant, before his pointer finger came into contact with her soft cheek.
Daryl gasped; releasing a breath he didn't even know he was holding. You watched the interaction with loving eyes; only now noticing that the small girl had stopped nursing and was wriggling around in your hold instead. Her eyes were closed and she had her legs pulled up against her belly; tiny fingers clenching and unclenching.
Your husband had cupped her head now, which was covered in a dark brown fuzz. "She's perfect, darlin'..." Daryl whispered after a long moment; smiling that smile you loved so much.
"Do you want to hold her?"
That question caused Daryl's hand to immediately stop caressing his daughter's head. "I-I..." He stammered; nervous, yet with such a strong urge. "Y-Yeah, I... I wanna hold 'er." You patted the empty space on the bed beside you. "C'mere, then." The archer followed your 'command' and switched from the chair to sit on the bed. Only now did you notice that he hadn't changed yet and that the shirt he wore was still damp. Worry roared to life within you. You didn't want him to catch a cold or even something worse...
"Baby, you should change... I don't want you to get sick..." Daryl shook his head. "Do want ta leave ya..." "I know..." You bit your lip; uncertain if you should propose the suggestion in your mind or not. "Then, uh... How about you take the shirt and vest off? Carol and Siddiq won't be here for at least another hour and skin-on-skin contact with your daughter would be good, too... Helps her bond with you." You gave him a soft smile. "It's your decision, though. I won't force you to do anything."
You could practically see the gears turning in your husband's head, but in the end he nodded and started to peel the damp clothes off his upper body. Once he was shirtless, you started to transfer the little girl over to her father. "Make sure to support her head, Dar," you instructed him; noticing his eager nod, and suddenly was the infant tucked in the crook of his arm. She snuggled against his bare chest; definitely enjoying the warmth of his skin.
And suddenly the world stopped to turn around Daryl.
He gazed down at the tiny human being he helped create - and she was the most wonderful, beautiful creature his eyes had ever seen (besides you, of course). Love flooded his veins; heart threatening to slosh over with the warm feeling.
Yes... He'd rip the world apart to keep her safe. Anything. Just to make sure his girls were protected.
You watched your husband and newborn daughter; a tired, but happy look on your face, and you realised soon, that everything had been worth it... Everything you've gone through. Every obstacle you and Daryl had to overcome, just to get here - to experience this moment. She was worth it.
You smiled. Yeah... You could definitely get used to Daryl being a dad...
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Tags: @angelwings-crossbowstrings @belitoxx @lou12346789 @fictive-sl0th @marvelcasey05 @loz-3 @mischief-dream @whore4romance @stitchintimefan @bigbaldheadname @making-the-most-0f-it @erebus-et-eigengrau @km-ffluv @0-aubrie0 @sweetz1919 @mikaela-granger @secretsicanthideanymore @dilfdixon @txtttttttttttttt @dixons-sunshine @stiveroon @cakesandtom @mayday2007
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moonstruckme · 2 months ago
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hello maeee!! i hope youre well!!
ive been STRUGGLING with higher level classes recently and its absolutely killing me 😭
could you maybe write something about reader who struggles academically (whether it be on certain subjects, procrastination, overworking , etc. is completely up to you!) with poly!marauders/one of the marauders??
sorry if youve already written something like this, this request is a bit self indulgent 😭
-💡
Hi angel, I'm really sorry you've been going through it! Thank you for requesting though, all the best requests are a bit self indulgent ;)
cw: academic stress
poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 678 words
James is a patient teacher, and in an effort to repay his kindness you’re really trying to keep your tears from falling. 
You keep your eyes steadfastly on your potions textbook as you flip through it. You’re blinking rapidly, looking for the chapter that contains yet another bit of information you’ve failed to retain, when Remus’ warm hand closes over your shoulder. 
“Careful,” he warns, bringing a steaming mug of coffee around you to set it on one of your closed books. 
“Thank you.” Your relief is immense. You’re the sort of tired that makes your eyes hurt and your brain feel dead, thoroughly worn out by hours of studying. You pick it up and take a sip. Look at your boyfriend in betrayal. “Decaf?” 
Remus gives you a look. “It’s evening, dove. You won’t be able to sleep.” 
“I’ve got some sleeping draught for later.” 
“Ah, substance abuse.” Sirius tosses you a grin from where he’s lounging on his bed, his own homework long since finished. “Must be very dark times.” 
Your face feels suddenly very hot. You turn it down towards your book again, but the quiet splat of a tear dripping off your nose and onto the pages gives you away. 
“Hey, hey.” Sirius sounds immediately panicked. “I’m joking, abuse whatever substances you like.” 
“Angel, what’s wrong?” James’ voice is surprised, but his hand finds your back anyway, rubbing between your shoulders firm and sure. “It’s okay. We’re nearly done.” 
You suck in a breath, hoping to collect yourself but horrified when it only triggers another hiccup of sobs. You put your hands at your hairline, hiding yourself. 
“I’m going to have to sucker punch Slughorn,” Sirius says, sounding mildly horrified at this realization. 
“Dove.” Remus steps in front of you, lifting your chin. “What’s going on? Are you tired, is that it?” 
You nod pathetically, tears carving hot paths down both cheeks. “I just feel s—so stupid,” you whimper. 
Remus’ brows hook in the middle, but it’s James who says, “Hey, why?” 
He thumbs away the wetness from the cheek closest to him, encouraging you to look at him with his hand on your face. His eyes are big and warm behind his glasses. 
“Because you’re having trouble with your homework? That happens to everyone sometimes.” 
You shake your head. “It used to be sometimes. I don’t know what it is, this year—” you stifle another sob “—I feel like I can’t understand anything anymore.” 
Remus sighs. “I think you’re just overworking yourself, sweetheart.” 
You almost want to laugh. “You think this is the result of working too much?” 
“I think that schoolwork is all you’ve been doing lately,” he says patiently. “I understand that you might be having a difficult time with the upper levels this year, but you’re not going to absorb anything new if you don’t take some breaks.” 
“True,” Sirius pitches in. “That invigoration draught you keep under your bed is making you twitchy, babe. You can hardly expect to pay proper attention in class when you’re nearly bouncing out of your seat.” 
Remus’ eyes narrow. “What?” 
“Bollocks.” Sirius makes a face. Sorry, he mouths to you. 
“Let’s go to dinner,” James saves you, closing your textbook and vanishing your coffee with a flick of his wand. “It’ll be good for you to think about other things for a bit, and we’ll finish up when we get back.” 
The prospect of a break relaxes you enough for your tears to abate. James swipes the remainders from your cheeks and pushes at the corner of your lips until you smile halfheartedly. 
Remus hums his approval. “You need to eat something proper,” he says, pinching you sternly under the chin, “and stop trying to usurp your circadian rhythm with potions.” 
“Substance abuse,” Sirius quips, hopping down from his bed to lead the way to the great hall, “best kept for the weekends, as I always say.” 
“Do you always say that?” James wonders aloud. “Seems rather impromptu.” 
“Well, that’s the mark of a good line, Jamesie. It always sounds off the cuff.”
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winterarmyy · 1 year ago
Text
My Person
A series of random Bucky Drabbles that I can't let go but don't have the brain to make the whole complete plot of.
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Summary: In which Sam's question forces Bucky to reveal his true feelings to his so called "friend", Y/N.
Pairing: tfatws!bucky x female!reader
Words: 3.2k++
Warnings: 18+ content, no minors allowed, nsfw, fluff, wee bit of angst, bucky is so adorable in this I WANT HIM SO BAD, also he is a bit feral. I feel like he can be more feral than this but you know, he doesn't wanna scare her away lol. This is just a result from surge of need so might not be too much of plot but I hope you enjoy your reading, anyway.
Inspiration: This post right here by @black-cat-2
Read my other works here: Masterlist
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Sam took notice on every single crooks and corners as he followed Bucky's dragging footsteps from behind. It wasn't that he didn't want to help him but Bucky refused the offer right on the bat, saying that the serum will fix him up sooner or later.
The aftermath of their final battle with the flagsmasher was chaotic to say the least. With the splitting sides of public opinions of the new Captain America and the whispers about how the former winter soldier saved a bunch of civilian tonight had been the talk of the town.
But both Sam and Bucky decided not to think of it too much,  especially when both were exhausted from the fight. Not to mention Bucky was injured. Although Sam knew damn well that the soldier can managed himself to a hotel to rest for the night like he always does, but as a worried friend, or rather a babysitter some would say, he insisted to accompany Bucky all the way through.
And Bucky was not in the mood to argue; Sam is as equally stubborn as Steve used to be, so he let the man do whatever he wants.
It was clear Sam was suspicious of where the hell did this terminator brought him to, but mostly he was curious. He thought he would just accompany him to the nearest hotel but nope. After taking an Uber, the next thing he knew, Bucky was leading him into this apartment building, that was obviously not his.
"Last time I checked your apartment was in Brooklyn. When did you get a place here?" Sam asked as Bucky stopped at one of the identical looking doors.
"It's not mine" Bucky replied truthfully as he removed the glove from his fleshed hand and pressed his thumb at the top of the door handle.
Sam eyed him with a look on his face when he sassed at him, "Said the guy who is currently unlocking the doors with his fingerprint."
Bucky simply rolled his eyes before the chiming sound alerts that the door was unlocked. Bucky opened the door to let Sam inside before he himself got in after him. "Seriously, man. If I knew you can afford having two apartments I would've asked you to pay for tonight's dinner. That's the least you can do..." Sam's words died as his eyes scanned the apartment.
Whatever he was expecting the apartment to look like, it was far from it. He surely was not expecting the place to be fully decorated with complete set of furniture in every area of the room. Whether it is the living room area, or the huge kitchen that was also equipped with built-in oven.
Even with the lack of light, Sam could see the color pallette on the walls were definitely not what Bucky would go for. The sentimetal trinkets on the shelves, the sweet fragrant of the scented candles; everything was the very opposite of what Bucky's apartment in Brooklyn looks like, feels like.
This, it felt like home. Warm and inviting. Quiet and serene.
"You know what? I take that back. Whose house have you broke us into?" Sam asked, almost in awe rather than shocked, "I know for a fact that this ain't your house."
Bucky huffed a heavy breath as he remove his tactical gears, "I didn't say it was mine, remember? Or flying with the pigeons in the sky had made you forgot how to undertand human language?" there was an unfiltered sarcasm in his tone that didn't go unnoticed by Sam.
So obviously he got defensive and unknowingly increase his volume as he countered, "Woah woah, that was uncalled for. And for your information pigeons can't fly as fast a my wings, and rest assured that I--"
Bucky swiftly stomped towards him, eyes wide almost in anger, while his metal hand reached to cover Sam's mouth, "Can you shut the fuck up, she's probably asleep and your noisy ass will wake--"
"Bucky?" A tiny yet groggy voice interrupted the conversation causing both of them to turn their attention to the source. The figure peeped itself from the bedroom, her uncertainty made it that only half of her body was revealed through the doorway.
Her squinting eyes indicates how recent she was woken up from her sleep and Bucky flashed a quick glared at Sam for that. Sam simply shrug with his hands the air as a response. He was still confused who is this woman and why were they in her house.
Bucky's tight features softens as he called for her, "Hey, babydoll. What are you doing up?"
Recognizing that voice anywhere her feet made her way to him, "Heard some noises." She answered shortly as her knuckles find her eyes and rubbed it lightly. The closer she gets, the clearer Bucky can see the dark circles under her eyes, signifying how much she was lacking of sleep.
His heart squeeze a little at the sight, "M'sorry, sweetheart." it was as if their bodies were magnets that they naturally found each other. Bucky opened his arms wide for her to find her rightful place in his embrace.
"It's okay" she mumbled against his sturdy chest. "Welcome home." She continued.
You'd be surprise to know how much the former winter soldier absolutely adore the feeling of her lips moving against his skin. Even if it was blocked by the fabric of his shirt. It always felt good and he swore he could not get enough of it.
Bucky leaned down on top of her head, inhaling the strawberry yogurt scent of her shampooed hair, "Yes. I am home, indeed." His hugged got tighter, crushing her just enough to make those pretty little sounds slipped her from lips.
Strings of hushed moan kept purring in her throat when Bucky lightly swayed her from side to side; his fleshed hand drawing invisible circles on the back of her waist, while his metal hand gently squeeze the back of her neck.
If she let him pamper her more than this, they'd probably forget that Sam was in the room. Unabashedly had his mouth agape at the sight in front of him. He was not sure whether he wanted to look away or to continue staring because no amount of explanation will suffice to answer his questions.
Peeking from Bucky's shoulder, she smiled warmly as she finally acknowledge the unexpected guest, "You must be Sam. I've heard a lot about you."
She tried to wiggle an escape from Bucky arms, but it was no avail; he was not planning to let her go any time soon. She ended up dragging the enormous koala bear who was stuck on her back as she offered Sam a handshake, introducing herself.
"Good things I hope." Sam took her hand and lightly shake it as she replied, "Of course." As much as he wanted to keep his eye contact with her, it was extremely hard when the grumpy super soldier that he knew was basically melting in crook of her neck.
"I don't want to be rude but the two of you are..." Sam purposely left his words hanging, hoping that one of them would finish the sentence before he let out his assumption, however both of them remained silent. The woman was blinking at him confused, while Bucky was practically still drooling over the her.
"...Lovers?" Sam ended his sentence with an uncertain tone.
Both of them went rigid to the question but before Bucky could say anything, she answered first, "No!" She almost shouted, taking a deep breath before she rephrase her answer, "No. I mean yes. We're not... like that."
"So, you guys are friends then?" Sam quirked an eyebrow to her answer, and seeing Bucky's silence, he guessed that the super soldier might liked her more than just 'friends'.
"Yup, we are. We first met when Bucky was on the run from Hydra, before you guys found him. It's a long story, really." And by the time she explained the shorten version of their story, Bucky finally drifted his attention to Sam, a deep frown decorated his brows as he was mentally asking, "How much longer are you going to stand there? Get the fuck out."
Sam should be offended by his silent orders but considering he came in the middle of the night, uninvited, he realized that he should leave them be,"Then, let that be a reason for us to meet again. You can tell me all about this meet-cute of yours later. I don't want to keep you away from him any longer. Especially when he is staring daggers at me."
She lightly tapped on Bucky's arms, and quick frown at him followed after as she non-verbally asking him stop glaring at Sam. Needless to say, Sam removed himself from the scene after they, or rather she, bid him goodbye.
As soon as the doors closed, Bucky has her back pressed against the door, wasting no time than to capture her lips. A gasped from her made it easy for him to slip his tongue inside. He kissed her slow yet so hungrily as if he was starved of the taste of her sweet mouth against his.
Bucky broke the kiss momentarily just to whisper, "I missed you so much, babydoll." With his thigh in between her legs, he guided her clothed core to slowly hump against him. "Missed you, too." Her beautiful moans only encourage his cock to swell even more than it already was.
Breaking the kiss, Bucky let her catch a breath as his glazed eyes adored her soft features. He still remembered the day when he first met her.  When he escaped from Hydra's control, he was determined to keep his life down low. Don't attract to much attention, follow the schedule and stick to rules.
And his schedule was never interesting, it was always:
- write his journal entry
- find/do odd and non-permenant jobs for money
- grocery shopping and cooking
- watch the news
- and mostly just stay at home
Obviously, Bucky knows how to use the internet and all those modern devices that they have nowadays, but he never understand them; the 'social media' and the 'viral' things were never really appealing to him. So one day he decided to pay a visit to a small local library; hoping to find fimiliar solace in books instead.
What are the odds that both of them reach for the same book at the same time? After the multiple exchange of: 'Oh, I'm sorry, here take it.' 'No, you take.' 'No, please I insist.' They ended up meeting on a common ground; making a decision to sit down and read together. Turns out, spending a few hours with her at the library was the most peace he had since forever.
Bucky had a strict routine and rules. But the moment she asked him if he want to spend more time with her while she was there, he was ready to break all of it. And he did; for 7 days straight.
She was his first sense of freedom. His first choice in life.
Though, back then he was on a run, for presumably a lifetime, while she was on business trip for a week. So, they lost contact after that, especially when Bucky was running around with the Avengers and fighting aliens, but fate seemed to be on their side when they were reunited again in New York.
It's a miracle that she even recognized him. Little did he knew, he wasn't the only one who got hooked on the first few hours of that reading session had.
Though, he was extremely grateful that she reach out the moment she recognized him; no hesitant, no doubt. Just a confident and cheerful shout of his name in middle of the park that he walks through everyday.
The first thing that came out from her mouth after calling out his name was a compliment of his new hair cut and how she can see his beautiful eyes more clearer now. And that alone had made Bucky absolutely red in blush.
Weeks after that, she often joined him with his daily walk, making it their routine instead of just his. And months into this newly founded 'friendship', they found solace in each other's arms, comfort in each other's touch, and this quickly become their new favourite activity to do together.
Though none of them ever actually discuss their status but their body language suggest that they are more than just friends.
Especially with the way Bucky was rubbing the tip of his leaking cock on her clit; so desperate yet so gentle. Just like how he always does when he makes love to her. But, tonight he felt different. Maybe he was just needy or maybe it was the way she admit that they were not lovers when Sam asked about their relationship.
It was true. But, it felt so wrong.
"Am I just a friend to you, doll? Bucky leaned forward, his forehead met hers, his hot breath tickling her skin.
His tongue briefly passed in between his lips as he spreads her legs further, revealing her dripping cunt for his display, "Do your friends touch you like this, hmm?" His husky whisper as he rubbed his hardened length in between her slit, brushing against her clit.
"Do your friends kiss you all over like me?" She moaned breathily, as he bit and kiss the softness of her breasts; easily leaving his marks as if she was his to claim.
And without any warning, his cock slammed straight into her hole, stretching the walls to his size causing her to yelp in painful pleasure. Bucky let out a satisfied groan as the tightness of her around him, "Do your friends fuck this tight little pussy with their cock like me?"
Bucky couldn’t stop himself from pulling and pushing his hips to meet hers, his fingertips was practically digging into the flesh of her hips, moving her in time with his thrusts, "What am I to you, baby?" Honestly, it was hard for her to form complete thoughts, let alone reply to his question when he was fucking her so good.
Gone was the gentleman she knew for the past years, the koala bear that she spent hours on the couch cuddling to a movie marathon with. Now, there was only this feral beast, hungry for pleasure, insatiable to devour her whole body and soul.
Each roll of his hips pushed her further from her sober thoughts, focusing only on the wild look on his face, his huge body hunched over hers, his throbbing cock kissing her cervix. Any answer she was trying to convey was lost at the tip of her tongue; there were just the mewling mess, as she fell apart underneath him, compliant to his every thrust as his cock ramming within her. "Tell me. Come on, now. Use your words."
Bucky was almost losing his mind, from how bad he wanted to cum and how stubborn she was for not answering his questions. He pushed her legs up and wide as his thrust punctuated to his words,  "What. Am. I. To. You?"
It took her a couple of long moans at his roughness, before she could utter a single word, the only correct answer to his question, "Mine."
He groaned approvingly, pulling back just enough to slide his metal between their bodies. "I'm yours?" Those hard, cold fingers that she loved so much was quick to find her clit. She was already sensitive from all the friction of his rutting, and now was he relentlessly assaulting the swollen nub, "Then, does that make you mine as well huh, sweetheart?"
"Yes, Bucky. You're mine. And I'm yours. All yours. Pleasee"
Her back arches off the bed, toes curling tight as her nails dug into his skin and across his back; To have some kind of a leverage to hold as the overwhelming pleasure surged through her body.
"Yeah, that's right, babygirl. You're mine and mine alone. Mine to love, mine to fuck. Yes?" Bucky taunted her with both his words and the way he rutted into her wet pussy, as if he himself was not close to the egde.
The sound of skin to skin clashing intertwined with the sounds of her pussy squelching around his cock, his girth kept pounding straight into her sweet spot to the point that only lewd whimpers of plead were spewing out of her lips, "Yes, yes yes. Oh Bucky please,, fuck,, I'm cumming!"
"Cum, sweetheart. Let me feel that tight little pussy of mine cum around my cock" He hummed approvingly as he picked a deeper and harsher pace, causing her mouth to fall wide open and her eyes screwed shut as she felt her whole body shook as she came. "Yeah,, that's it, doll. That's my girl. fuckkk,, feels so good baby, gonna make me cum inside you if you keep choking me like that."
"Please, Bucky?" A breathy moan of his name passed her lips as she her walls spasm with need. Bucky groan to the sensation, he was sure that her pussy was already full of his precum, considering how it has been leaking inside her for so long, "Want my cum in you, pretty girl?"
Batting her eyes through her lashes, she stared up at him, pleading., "Need it, please."
"Oh fuck, you got it, sweetheart." Throwing his head back in pleasure, shutting his eyes solely to focus of the feeling of her wet and tight cunt, Bucky's pace quicken as he chased his high, "Hmmm,, fuckk,, gonna stuff you full. You'll leaking for days, babydoll. Then, I'm gonna keep filling you until you can't live without my cum inside your pussy."
Hearing such dirty confessiom only triggers her to near orgasm, "Yess pleasee i want it. Need it, bucky." Surely enough she came again when he hit that special spot inside her.
"Ahh,, fuck ahhh,, I'm cumming shit pussy so good m'cumming fuckkkk", Bucky couldn’t even stop himself from rutting in and out of her sweet pussy as his cock pulsed, especially when her cunt was sucking him in deeper.
His head fall down to watch his cock disappear inside her before squeezing it shut again when the white spurt of cum shoots against her walls. His jaw was loose as his mouth formed an ‘o’ shape to allow his loud groans contaminated the silenced room.
His thick endless cum warm her insides and the honeyed moans hanging off her lips to its own accord as Bucky hunched over her frame, pressing his face in crook of her neck, breathing heavily as she was. After awhile, a broken sound of his voice stopped the silence, "Do you really mean it?"
He refused to look at her in the eyes, afraid of the rejection that might come his way but she proved him wrong by holding him by his cheeks, leading his eyes to align with hers,
"Bucky. You, my dear, are my bestfriend; you are my heart, you are my person. And there is no one in this world that I'd rather spend my whole life with besides you." Her words was nothing but the truth and Bucky knew that.
His heart swelled with joy yet he didn't know how to express it other than, "I love you, doll..." there was pause as if he was gathering the pieces of his soul to offer it to her, "...So much."
And she accepted it with her whole heart, "I love you too, Bucky."
End.
Read my other works here: Masterlist
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A/N: I was gone for awhile but never too long. Hope you enjoy this little drabble 👀
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zevrra · 2 months ago
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JJK—
synopsis: just some random hc’s i have for the men of jjk!
tags: fluff only, the men of jjk, nanami kento, choso kamo, geto suguru, gojo satoru, toji fushiguro, hc’s, short & sweet
creator notes: part 2
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nanami !!
— is totally that “i will take care of you in every aspect” guy but i secretly think he’s pretty possessive too
— doesn’t get jealous easily
— flip flops between being a total morning person (on his days off) but the days he has to “work” he’s the opposite
— love/hate relationship with coffee bc he def drinks 8 cups of it every morning and feels gross after he does it
— the epitome of cleanliness and perfect hygiene
— like 100% he uses top of the line shampoo and body washes and after shaves and cologne!!
— ALWAYS smells good and it’s a mix of amber, some kinda wood, and probably something soft like vanilla
— feel like he’s cheap when it comes to stuff for himself but anytime it involves you, he’s buying you the best of the best
— leaves you notes all over the place whether it’s on the fridge, next to your side of the bed, sending flowers to your work space with a note attached, all just to tell you how much he cares and loves you
— willingly works overtime for you :3
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choso !!
— sleeps until 4 pm every day
— a true night owl, mans HATES the sun
— feel like he’s super photogenic but hates taking photos unless you’re taking them
— would work any electronic like an elderly man
— “i can’t find the settings on this thing. where is it i’ve been looking for it for 15 minutes!” “it’s right here” “oh. how did you do that?”
— either has no scent at all or smells like iron/cinnamon/or straight up blood im so sorry skshskhkdhsk
— you both match everything from jewelry, especially rings, to outfits
— sleepy eye bags 24/7!!!
— takes a 5 minute shower but sits in the bathroom on his phone watching the loudest videos he can for 45 mins before he gets in
— loves spicy food!!
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geto !!
— leaves gifts in your rooms without a word
— is the type to “i saw it and it reminded me of you so i got it”
— loves wholeheartedly. full chest, heart, mind, body, and soul
— willingly hands you his hoodie after he’s done wearing it
— quality time & gift giving is his love language!!
— heavy on quality time, he wants to sit or stand beside you and just coexist 24/7
— matching tattoos and piercings
— scary guard dog bf!!!!
— actually doesn’t mean to be but he kind of loves it a lot when other guys run away from you(him)
— his pet names for you range from “babe” to “stinky” and everything in between
— probably smells like sage & citrus
— he takes the longesssst showers ever and always invites you to them
— let’s you braid his hair, falls asleep every time you do it
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gojo !!
— wants to touch you constantly!
— you’re either holding his hand or sitting in his lap anytime you two are together
— loves loves loves hugs
— gossip QUEEN! omg he’s so nosy
— “did you HEAR about this????” and it’s either the most basic information or straight up gossip gold
— always emphasizes the MY in his pet names for you
— “oh my love!” “my darling.” “hmm my princess?”
— a jealous, jealous man >:3
— loves to show you off until someone other than himself looks at you jshsjshk
— is the type of dude who acts all funny and tough in public but the second it’s just the two of you, at home, he wants to be babied and have his back scratched 24/7
— doesn’t tell you when it’s going to be chilly out so he gets to tease you as he hands you his warm jacket
— plans surprise dates all the time
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toji !!
— is never caught wearing anything other than sweat pants
— wore a suit once for your first date and then never put it back on
— his love language is probably a mix between physical touch and gift giving
— has a hand always placed on your thigh!!
— his favorite season is winter and when you ask him why he just says he likes the cold
— it probably also has to do with wanting to keep you warm too
— is the type to: “i hate wearing bracelets” “ok ill just take it back” “no fuck you i’m gonna wear it and never take it off”
— literally keeps everything you give him in a box so he doesn’t lose them
— uses 13 and 1 shampoo
— calls you his old lady(affectionate) unironically
— smells like cigarettes and cheap ass beer KSHSKHS
— when he’s actually clean and sober he probably smells more like heavy wood and fire/smoke
— is a massive HEATER when he sleeps and he always sleeps on his back
— sleeps in the nude
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satoruhour · 1 year ago
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gojo nuttin in you and plugging you up!!!!
a/n: request: “I’m sure you’ve probably done something about it but the way that the idea of gojo coming in you and pulling your panties up after is so IRBDJEHDBEBSBNS makes my brain numb no thoughts off the walls feral” + so im combining these two! uhm. horny devil took over me while writing
warnings: fem!reader, reader is deep in sub-space, semi-public sex, multiple rounds, pet names, calls you ‘slut’, unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink, lots of cum, n*sfw under the cut
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no one really knew where this breeding kink of gojo had come around, not when he was the student talking about how annoying kids were and then got blessed with megumi and tsumiki.
he’d like to think that it wasn’t because he wanted to see little yous and hims running around the house. sure, it definitely was in his future plan, but with everything going on it would be too chaotic, so he’s willing to wait. it unveils itself to him one night after cumming deep in you; it related more to his possessiveness over you—
it rings true when he’s got you riding him in his office chair, the pleasure of his cock deep in you overtaking the discomfort in your thighs. you’ve been holding back for the longest time in the meeting with the higher-ups and the other sorcerers, unable to stop your glances toward your boyfriend while they talked of another emerging curse user.
you jumped him as soon as the meeting was over.
“f . . fuck, baby,” gojo’s breathless as he says it, a thumb to your clit and drawing languid circles. it only prompts your pussy to clench around him and your head falls down to your connected bodies. “hear how sloppy your fuckin’ cunt is, sweets.”
you can both hear and see it, see the drag of your pussy along his length and the pleasurable stretch of your walls around him. your hands go around his neck to play with his hair, messing with the abandoned blindfold resting along his clavicle.
“were you this wet for m-me, for the whole meeting?”
your scrunched up eyes struggle to open as you meet his blue ones, a choked yeah leaves your lips as you continue to bounce on him. there’s sweat lining both your bodies from the clothes still inhabiting your persons, slowly getting soiled from your juices, too.
“oh, baby, you know i would’ve dropped everything to fuck you then and there—” satoru grits his teeth when you tighten around him again and you moan out loud at the words he says. you’re not even sure whether you came, thighs shaking from your mini orgasm that you limp forward into your boyfriend’s arms.
gojo coos into your hair, doing the work now as he fucks into your spent body. the slap of his balls against your ass is obscene, whining into your ears before he starts to rut in short little thrusts again. “cumming— cu—”
gojo’s eyes squeeze shut, hiding his forehead in your neck as he spills deep in you. a deep groan reverberates from his throat, feeling his cum feel you up spurt after spurt and you’re the same, mewling softly beside his ear that only gets him hard again.
“that’s right, take all my cum, baby.” gojo mumbles, drunk on the feel of your pussy before he remembers he has a class to get to.
“you gonna keep my cum in you?” he asks breathlessly, a little softer than he expected to. but his heart soars when you nod obediently, letting him help you put your other leg into your panties. his cum still threatens to spill out, but it’s still better with the fabric barrier.
gojo is disgusting like that, “i’ll see you at home, alright?” he taps your butt playfully, landing a sloppy kiss to your lips and indulges you with a few more pecks.
that one feeling hasn’t left him since the afternoon, determined to pump you full again that he couldn’t even conduct a class properly. all he wanted to do was to rush back to you, with a sweet reward granted to him.
you were so dazed from his cock that you decided it wouldn’t hurt to put on your favourite set under your clothes, tending to your own errands as you wait for your boyfriend to return. so when you’re welcoming him with more touches than usual and a sultry voice to match, he knows he wasn’t the only one with that creampie on his mind.
you aren’t sure what round you’re on by now, pussy feeling so slick and full from how much he’s cummed in you that your mind is fuzzy and muddled.
“like it when i breed you, hm?” he slams into you from above, bed creaking from just how rough he was being. he’s got your body pressed deep into the sheets and your ass up and as usual, he’s got your back arching uncomfortably.
“y— yeah, yeah, s’much, ’toru!” you whine into your hands, feeling your orgasm approach again as you feel like you’re driven to your limit everytime and yet you come back for more. gojo is quick to cum again, cock stilling in you as he pumps you yet again and the sight is so messy.
your ass and pussy is painted with white and gojo grins seeing your hole push out his seed. he purses his lips, scooping up his cum and pushing it back in. and then he’s got you on him again, thrusting into you from below. the strings of his cum stick to your pelvis, paired with your cum pooling at the base of his cock. it’s so sticky and lewd, the squelching sounds of pussy.
“can never get e-enough, of pumping you full, princess.” you groan into thin air, juices spraying everywhere from the sheer amount of it.
“love it— wan’ more, pleasepleaseplease.” you’re out of your mind, driven into oblivion and you think that this truly was your limit, sobbing out your lover’s name when he starts to rub circles along your clit and you’re squirting, hips bucking away from the overstimulation and you grab onto his forearms like a vice.
“good little slut . . mh, squirting all over my cock— s-shit—” you’re cumming so much he can feel it on his thighs, soaking his skin and sheets. the grip you have on his cock is insane, making him so difficult to move that he grunts and stammers, pelvis faltering with a twitch to his dick.
“going to— give you another load, baby.” he mumbles breathlessly, giving one last deep thrust that has your eyes rolling back into your skull and body trembling and you’re so deep into sub-space that you just let him manhandle you roughly. satoru’s hips snap up into you impatiently before he’s cumming deep again, mind turned into mush once ropes and ropes of cum is pushed into your womb. you feel so full, so dumbed down that you don’t notice him scrambling for something in the bedside table.
“got your slutty pussy somethin’,” he whispers. the first pull out of gojo’s cock is gross, a translucent sheen of white covering his shaft from how much he’s cummed in you before he removes himself completely. you gasp at the emptiness, sinking behind into his embrace before you feel full again.
a cute little toy takes the place of his cock, a baby blue plug that is stuffed deep in you and possessiveness is starting to turn into wanting to get you knocked up. gojo isn’t sure any more.
your boyfriend prompts you to look down, caressing your thighs as he hums into your ears and you shiver lightly.
“need you to keep every last drop — can you do that, baby?” you feel him smile against your lips when you turn your head to kiss him, an affirmative response muttered against his lips together with a confession.
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tagging @hyomagiri @jabamin @shotorus @satohruu :3
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kamaluhkhan · 11 months ago
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anti-curse
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pairing: percy jackson x daughter of apollo!reader
summary: whether he knew it or not, percy jackson made the world a better, brighter place — and you intend to protect him, no matter what path the fates leads you down. fuck prophetic dreams. the future wasn't written in stone.
warnings/disclaimers: mentions of typical demigod things (battles, weapons, etc.); this is set during the heroes of olympus series so roughly follows that plot + features the seven demigods; mainly inspired by book!percy (dark hair, sea green eyes) bc that's the one i fell in love w growing up; characters are aged up from the book (reader + percy are meant to be 21-22 y/o) bc i imagine there was more time between prophecies/series....anyways, please enjoy <3
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when you first met percy jackson, he almost shot you through the chest with an arrow.
given that apollo is your godly parent, you often found yourself at the archery field, which happened to be one of the first stops on percy’s tour of camp half-blood. after that first mishap, your other half-siblings were, understandably, too scared to let percy try again — frankly chiron seemed a bit hesitant as well — and you could sense that percy felt disheartened. so, you flashed the boy a reassuring smile before giving him a few pointers and a second chance. when he smiled back at you, you felt a fluttering in your stomach that told you percy jackson would be more than a little important in your life.
archery still wasn't percy's strong suit, but your gut feeling turned out to be true. you and percy had dealt with a lot since then — a handful of quests, several prophecies, more than a few near-death experiences, a titan war, and, maybe worst of all, high school. you couldn't imagine getting through any of it without him by your side, and you knew the feeling was mutual.
so, you were entirely anticipating that percy would be hurt by your announcement during dinner. 
“no way that’s happening.” percy laughs, as if he can’t believe you’d suggest something as ridiculous as not having him accompany you on your quest. he remains unfazed, takes a sip of his electric blue coke before gesturing to the empty seat next to him. “come on, sunshine. have something to eat.”
the nickname sends your heart into a frenzy as you sit next to him. you and percy had never been anything other than friends, but sometimes....sometimes you look at his dangerous ocean eyes and wind-swept dark hair and it makes you blush. sometimes you consider the way his laughter fills you with warmth and his smile holds a thousand memories, the way he teases and winks at you and you decide that he makes your world so much brighter. sometimes you remember how sarcastic and thoughtful and loyal and reckless he is, his heart of gold and unpredictability of the sea. and you start to think that maybe possibly you'd fallen in love with your best friend.
that was not the issue at hand, though. you summon your favourite food and drink, but don't particularly feel like having either. percy returns to his conversation with hazel about how the two of you would drive up to montauk after you finally got your license, any time either of you needed to escape your reality, even just for a night. you'd sit on the beach, stargazing and roasting stale marshmallows and wishing to stay there forever. hazel seems to think that sounds like a nice escape, and percy promises that once the eight of you fulfill this prophecy, you'll all go to the beach house together, which makes hazel break out into a grin.
you can't help but smile at percy who loves his friends, who has loved you for so long. that feeling is quickly replaced by a pang in your chest that reminds you what's at stake. from the corner of your eye, you notice annabeth across from you, who looks at you like you’re a puzzle she can’t quite solve. you're trying to hide it, but if anyone can read you better than percy, it's annabeth. she knows something is weighing on your mind. you briefly lock eyes with jason, who you had gone to earlier for help, from the other side of the room, where he sits between piper and frank. 
if you weren’t so distracted, you would have been able to enjoy dinner. the eight of you — all demigods of the current great prophecy — hadn’t been all together in a while, and it was nice to share a meal aboard the argo ii despite the reality of why you’d all been traveling together. leo had equipped the ship with magic plates and cups, and with the lively jokes and stories filling the air, you could almost imagine it was an ordinary summer evening at camp. you could almost forget that tomorrow, you had to go on a quest to rescue apollo and artemis from python, a monster so powerful your father barely defeated him thousands of years ago. you could almost ignore the impending war with gaea and the giants, and the doomed fate of the world if you were to fail. the one thing you could no longer ignore, however, is the gut feeling you have about the fate of the boy sitting next to you if your quest is to unfold the way you had first planned it. 
you clear your throat, an attempt to interrupt the group's conversations. 
“i was serious earlier,” you declare. “you’re not coming with me, percy. jason is.”
the smile percy had on his face fades. his eyes are filled with concern and disbelief, as he glances at you. “i – i don’t understand.”
"percy,” jason jumps in carefully, aware that he’s treading through dangerous waters like you had warned him. “y/n and i were strategizing earlier and it seems to make the most sense, given our powers combined." 
percy shakes his head. “but — but you can’t just make last minute changes. we’ve already got everything set. right, valdez?”
leo shrugs, swallowing a mouthful of chicken before responding. “i don’t know, man. i’m no expert in quests, but it seems like i’m not the one who should be deciding this.” leo looks at you, and you nod gratefully.
you've been on edge since last night, and to calm your nerves you fiddle with the gold chain around your neck. it was a gift from your father: a necklace with a music note charm that can transform into an electric guitar or a bow and quiver. thankfully, you hadn't had to need both at the same time.
“it's up to me. and i want leo and jason to come with me.”
“then i’ll come too,” percy's voice remains calm, but insistant.
“isn’t there that thing about quests usually being done in threes?”
“that is true, piper,” percy agrees. he tilts his head towards you, like he's calling on you to remember. "exceptions have been made, though. like that one time with zoe." that had been years ago, when demigods from camp half-blood and hunters of artemis joined forces. five had been sent out on a quest, but only three came back. you shiver at the thought.
"or my quest through the labyrinth," annabeth recalls.
"but won't that also change our other plans, though?" hazel asks.
"not necessarily," you pipe in, your voice more assertive. "if jason and percy just switch. no harm done."
"we're not interchangeable," percy grumbles.
"hera sure seemed to think so!" leo searches the room for positive responses to his joke, but the most he gets is a half-hearted laugh from frank. "too soon?"
you take a deep breath. "it's not a big deal, really."
"it kind of is," percy counters. "you've never gone on a quest without me."
"you've gone on quests without me," you point out.
"that's...that's different."
"why? because i'm so weak that i need the son of the sea god to protect me at all times?"
you're giving percy the coldest stare you ever have. he hesitates to hold your gaze.
"you know that's not what i meant," he sighs.
"then what did you mean?"
percy looks at you, his eyes and tone softer. “look, sunshine, let's just stick with the plan, alright? we can just —”
“gods, you never listen, do you?" you finally snap. "you're not coming! i don’t want you there, percy!”
percy stares at you, stunned. you look around the table, and everyone looks back at you, wide-eyed. they weren’t used to this side of you, your sudden outburst not fitting in with your usually sunny disposition. 
“well, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” leo jokes in an attempt to lighten the mood, with less than ideal results.
“you saw something in your dreams, didn’t you?” annabeth realizes. 
her conclusion makes you freeze.
demigod dreams are always significant, carrying vivid images of monsters, messages from friends or enemies. some children of apollo like you had visions of the future — pseudo prophecies that are supposedly set to unfold given the path you’re on. technically, you weren’t supposed to share your visions, something about messing with fate or destiny, but that didn’t mean you had to accept the way things were. 
what you saw in your dreams last night, what might happen to percy, made your blood run cold.
you would defy all the laws of the universe and divine rules if it meant you could protect him. so fuck the path the fates are attempting to lead you down, and fuck prophetic dreams. you refuse to let percy die. no matter how frustrated you’re acting towards him in this moment, you know he would still do the same for you.
you figure that the future isn't written in stone, right?
either way, you're willing to challenge destiny for percy jackson.
without answering annabeth, you get up from the table and take a deep breath, carefully avoiding percy’s gaze. 
“i go with leo and jason, or i go alone.” your voice is steady, fighting the heavy beating of your heart and tears caught in your throat. “either way, i leave in the morning.” you exit the mess hall before anyone — before percy — can protest.
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klausysworld · 10 months ago
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Hi could you write some angst about a deeply insecure reader who hates her appearance and is sort of friends with Elena and everyone(pushed to the side kind of relationship)but when klaus comes around it’s clear that she has a crush but believes he’s out of her league then klaus uses it to his advantage by showing an interest in her for information and helps her with her self worth.klaus then starts to develop feelings for her but then it’s revealed that he was just manipulating her and reader is devastated and utterly humiliated and it sets her back to how she was before him.(sorry if that was a really long explanation,you can decide the ending)thanks I love your writing btw
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Real
Growing up in Mystic Falls is a bizarre experience.
There were town events almost every month where you had to dress up and act better than everyone, parents basically had a competition over who had the prettiest daughters or the most handsome sons.
Not my parents.
They didn't think I was good enough to even pretend that I could compete. I was told my worth from a young age and became more aware of it with time. When your own parents don't think you're good enough it's sort of an eye-opener if you will.
It didn't help that everyone in this town seemed to be born into modelling.
Somehow I was lucky enough to wind up 'friends' with people like Elena, Caroline and Bonnie but I knew I didn't belong with them. Somehow they were gorgeous enough to get whatever they wanted.
Sometimes I wondered if everyone else at the age of 17 looked like them and I was behind or if somewhere, I was above average. I doubted it. A lot.
Occasionally I would look at a mirror and think that I wasn't even that bad to look at. There was nothing particularly ugly about me, there just wasn't anything special. I looked plain in a way, bland and forgettable.
I was very forgettable actually. My 'friends' made that abundantly clear throughout the years when they would go out without me or forget to ask if I also wanted something or liked something.
Somehow I was of no value to them. Perhaps I was simply there to amplify their beauty. Like a DUFF. I was definitely the DUFF.
Damon actually told me that I was once, after Tyler had made the joke and Damon asked what it meant. Even though I already knew it to be true, to be told it was much worse.
You could sort of tell everyone else was thinking it, especially when I was stood beside Caroline.
Stefan was the only one who was nice but I wasn't sure if it was out of pity or just because that was who he was. Then again, I'd rather just not know.
So I tried my best to keep in the background, avoid attention and stay out the way.
Even with all the vampire and werewolf drama that took course, I kept myself quiet and to the side. Strangely it was Katherine who was kind to me, whether she had an ulterior motif I'm not so sure anymore but she never hurt me in the time she was there. Neither did Elijah when he came to town, he was polite to everyone but it was obvious that my presence was irrelevant to him.
And then of course, Klaus arrived.
I didn't officially meet him until the senior prank night, he sort of just threw to the side and told me to keep my mouth closed and not to bother running because he'd just kill me. Part of me thought about running anyway so he would just end it but I didn't.
Klaus dragged me by my wrist into his car, told me to keep quiet while he drove Elena to the hospital. For whatever reason he brought me along and left me in the car as he went to drain her of blood for his hybrids. I did as told: sat silently and waited.
He came back out and spoke to Damon for a moment, I saw them glance over in my direction only for Damon to laugh and smirk. I sighed to myself and got out the car. It was clear that Klaus thought I could be a good pawn but was surly mistaken and Damon told him to do whatever he wanted to me. In response I walked home, neither noticed so it was fine.
A week or so later he came back, crashed homecoming or something? I dunno, I wasn't there but I was told about it the next day via a stroppy Caroline.
It was that same day that he came and sat beside me at the grill. I ignored him for the most part, confused by his attempt at what I could only guess was flirting? I wasn't really sure. I think he could tell.
"Not easily impressed are you love?" he questioned as he leant forward, uncomfortably close. I sort of just looked at him, still unsure to what he wanted. A smirk pulled at the end of his lips and his hand lifted, his fingers wrapping around a piece of my hair making frown and pull away abruptly. Without hesitation I stood up and spun on my heel, going to leave. His laugh followed me and a hand grabbed my waits, it was stange.
"Calm down love, It's not like I was going to rip it out, I just wondered what it felt like" he chuckled, pulling my back flush against his front making me tense and squirm.
"It feels like hair" I stated simply "Now get off" I grunted, shoving my elbow into his side to make him let go. I kept walking, keeping my eyes on the ground.
The next time I saw him he apologised for the previous encounter which again, i didn't understand but there was no point in questioning and arguing so I just accepted it and tried to leave but he asked if I'd stay for one drink, he asked so nicely and he smiled. I was stupid enough to think it was genuine and accepted.
Looking back it was pretty obvious that this was a game for him or a trap, whatever you want to label it but in the moment I ignored what was right in my face. Deep down I knew it was all a joke of sorts really.
But no boy, let alone a man had shown me this sort of attention and the soft fluttering it made me feel had me staying for far too long. I listened to his little stories and asked a range of questions as the drinks kept coming. He asked a couple about me but i gave relatively vague answers. There wasn't much I had to give him on me, I wasn't up for a pity party about friends and I didn't really fancy talking about my shitty parents either. I think Klaus picked up on the fact that I didn't really want to talk about me and eventually gave up with it.
It was late when I realised I needed to get home and he offered to take me which I admit made me wary. I didn't want him to kidnap me and think I'd be any good as leverage again, though I guess Damon made that pretty clear already. I decided to just walk home which he eventually accepted and got into his car.
Walking by myself probably wasn't my best option after drinking so much in one go but I made it home with minimal stumbling. My mother shook her head when she saw me and asked what was wrong with me. When she realised I had been drinking her mind jumped to two very different conclusions. The first being that I was being a slut which was ironic as in the past she'd made it clear that no guy would want to sleep with me, and the second being that I had taken pills to kill myself.
Listening to her drastic thinking made me wonder what kind of pills she was on but I didn't question it and waited for my father to come and take her to bed, telling her to just ignore me. Then I proceeded to make my way to the bathroom, getting changed and washing my face before going to my bed.
My phone dinged making me sigh, thinking it was Elena asking me to help her with something dumb and life threatening however much to my surprise it was Klaus. A smile involuntarily spread across my face and we messaged back and forth before he told me to rest.
The following few days he would just check in. Not too much but he also made it clear that he hadn't forgotten me which was all I had ever truly wanted from someone. To be acknowledged at the very least.
Of course I didn't tell the others that he had been talking to me, besides they didn't ask so I didn't see why I should. I guess I just wanted something for myself.
I wasn't completely stupid. I always had the feeling that he was using me, especially towards the start...but he was just so wonderful with his words and his ways.
When he began to make and buy sweet gifts and claim they were tokens of his affection, I couldn't help the blush on my face. When he would find a way to have his skin against mine, or how he would pick up my hand and gently tug my along. Somehow we always seemed to end up somewhere for food, and he would always refuse to let me pay.
Something about him was so enticing, addictive if you will.
He began to make me feel a certain way. He made me warm and happy. His touch was so soft, it made me feel like I was buzzing. i was stupid for thinking he could feel the same way about me.
I had been so scared to admit my feelings.
He had assured me that he would never push me to.
He told me that he liked me, that he didn't want me to be frightened of him or nervous around him. "Not unless it's the sort of nervous that puts butterflies in your stomach sweetheart" he had teased and my cheeks had glowed red.
Over the space of months his presence never lessoned. He always made time to see me, and speak with me. I found myself longing for his voice, his touch.
On days where he was too busy at home, he would urge me to come over. I would spend as long as I possibly could with him, a few times I even stayed over but he had slept on top of the duvet so that I would feel comfortable.
This had gone on for a small while until he actually said the words 'I love you'.
Perhaps I was just so happy to actually hear those words. Maybe I believed them to be true, real. Or I just saw what I wanted to see, heard what I wanted to hear and ignored the rest.
The time I gave myself to him used to make my smile and blush. Now it just makes me feel dirty, humiliated and embarrassed.
Knowing that he could and has had his hands all over my body, his lips and eyes. In the moment I felt like a goddess, probably because that’s what he told me I was. The memory of him inside me haunts me. I had thought it to be such a beautiful experience, romantic and personal.
I wish I could say that I had slept with him only once but as the months went by we would share intimacy often.
I had even told him that I loved him, so many times and I meant it for all of them.
So you should understand why it was so hard to accidentally hear him tell his sister that he had been compelling me for any information on the others.
It had felt as though my heart had stopped when the words hit my ears and tears already made my eyes burn. I heard a weak laugh and turned my head to see Damon, strung up by chains whilst bleeding all over, looking straight back at me.
“Y/n…” I heard Klaus’s voice, his tone one of panic or maybe it was just surprise. He probably didn’t want me to know of his routine. Damon only rolled his eyes and gave me look,
“You didn’t…think it was real, right?” He coughed, a cruel smile on his face.
His words just made me quieter. They made me think. Why did I think it was real?
My eyes slowly lifted to meet Klaus’s. I could see and feel Rebekah looking at me, everyone was silent. Even Damon shut up for a second. I think maybe he was expecting me to say something but I didn’t really have anything to tell him.
As awful as it all made me feel, and even with the amount of emotions swallowing me, I felt more disappointed in myself than I did him.
My right hand went to my left arm, pinching my skin through my jumper in some sort of hope that I’d wake up from some stupid nightmare but it didn’t work.
The first tear fell from my eye and I sniffed to keep the other ones from coming.
Klaus just looked at me, I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, I didn’t want to know either. I could just guess anyway.
So without a word I just turned around and left, walking quickly back out the door before breaking into a sprint in the direction of my house. I could feel the mascara running down my face, ruining the foundation I had only recently started wearing, for Klaus’s benefit.
My hands wiped at the tears as I pushed my from door shut behind me and went upstairs, blocking out the annoyed voices of my parents and locking myself in my room.
It was only once I was in the shower that I was flooded with memories. That I remembered all the things I had done with him. By the time I stepped out of the bathroom my skin was scrubbed raw in an attempt to wash his touch away. Even the slightest touch made me feel as though my body was burning, stinging with pain but I would have rather felt that every day than have to realise Klaus had been using me for over a year now.
I was curled in my bed, hidden under the blankets and surrounded by the dark as I let every comment not matter how small or petty play back through my mind.
I wasn’t even sure who to be upset with. I chose myself.
Klaus must’ve known I was an easy target. Desperate. I wonder how much he’s had me tell him. To be fair I knew more than you’d expect about what was going on. I had gotten good at observing and overhearing so I still knew what was going on, even when spending so much time with Klaus himself.
I also wondered what else he had compelled me to do. I hoped he wouldn’t do anything other than ask questions but I couldn’t help that fear creep inside me. It made me sick to my stomach, and then I wondered if he would just wait to compel me again so that I could continue to be his information feeder.
The idea made my fingers dig into my arm, bruising the skin purple but I wouldn’t stop. I only did so that I could go get some vervain that I kept downstairs in one of the cupboards at the back. I was reaching for the little glass bottle when I heard a door close. I spun around quickly to see Klaus in the doorway of my kitchen. My hand clutched onto the vervain tightly and I noticed his eyes glance at it briefly. His hands went up as if to show no harm but there was no way I would believe that meant a thing.
“Sweetheart- listen to me..” he began and I let out a breathless laugh
“Get out” I whispered making him sigh and frown as though he had the audacity to be upset or annoyed.
“Y/n..”
“No Klaus. I’m fucking serious, get out.” I told him, my eyes watering again. I let out an involuntary whimper when he stepped forward making him stop and stand still.
“I never meant for you to know that” he whispered and I frowned, swiping a tear away.
“Sorry I ruined your plan” I mumble, exhausted.
“No- no I didn’t mean it like that- I meant that-“
“Klaus it’s fine” I murmur, avoiding his eye, “It’s fine, I get it. You needed to know what was happening, you got to be two steps ahead. I’d appreciate if you just found someone else now please”
I could feel his stare on me, it make my skin itch and I just needed him to go. I could feel my hand getting clammy as I held onto the bottle.
“I haven’t compelled you in such a long time” he muttered, as though maybe that made it better. “I used to, but I truly have fallen for you Y/n. I love-“
“Please get out” I cut him off, my spare hand resting on my forehead to cover my eyes.
“I love you”
“No you don’t” I cry, “you wouldn’t do this to someone you love. I know you don’t love me. You never have and you never could. You’re just pretending again so I’ll let you control me, I don’t like it” I whimper, tears streaming again. I could hear him getting closer but I was already against the counter and I couldn’t out run him. There was no point in trying.
“Sweetheart, I’ll never use you again-“ he tried to argue but I couldn’t listen to it.
“I really, really need you to leave. Please Klaus just get out, I can’t stand you” I tell him honestly and for a second as I look up at him, he looks almost sad but I have to assume it’s still apart of his act.
“You- you’re not going to do anything…anything harmful are you? To yourself, I mean.” He asked and I felt a wave of embarrassment wash over me. I should never have told him that I’d had those thoughts or feelings once. I shouldn’t have ever said a word to him.
“No…now go away” I whisper, my hands trembling as I stared at the ground, listening to his footsteps eventually get further away.
I knew there was no way I could sleep, he was probably still outside my house. Waiting.
I wasn’t sure what he was waiting for but I could him there.
I had no idea what I was going to do.
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areyouwell · 3 months ago
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Sciophobia
Noun: An extreme fear of shadows. An adult or child with Sciophobia may experience extreme stress and anxiety in everyday life due to the nature of light and shadow.
Ch.2
Ch.1 <---
Pairing: Logan Howlett x F!Mutant!Reader
Warnings: the most DISGUSTING, tooth-achingly sweet fluff, like candyfloss-style shit. i vomited twice writing it and once again proofreading it. they make pasta together for TWO THOUSAND WORDS so if that ain't yer thing im sorry the good stuff will start soon. and by that i mean body horror. i threw up writing that for a completely different reason...
Word count: 11k (strap in and strap on folks)
A/N: as mentioned in the warnings, this is almost pure fluff. sure there's MC rage so strong my timbers were shivered but other than that it's mostly fluff. i want you guys to know, i am setting us all up for failure, because this WILL get sad. but it'll get hot first, then downright filthy, the a little disgusting before it gets sad, we got a while to go so booties ch.2 LFG
Taglist: @badbishsblog @reidsworld @idioticstar @toogaytofunctiondangit
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“Maybe just try… concentrating harder?” 
It took all of your willpower not to cross the few steps it would take to punch Scott’s lights out. Why the Professor assigned him to help with your training, you’d never know. Sure, it wasn’t like you were constantly at each other’s throats like he and Logan seemed to be, but you never exactly saw eye to eye either. Scott was too… neat, for you. He liked rules too much, always following what his head told him he should do, rather than following his heart or gut. It was infuriating on missions, and you’d had plenty of arguments about the correct course of action before he became the de facto leader whether you liked it or not. 
That was shortly before you went away, so you didn’t really have much time to experience the dictatorship of Scott Summers, and now you were back, you weren’t entirely sure you wanted to. 
“Ya know what Scott? I’d never thought of doing that, thanks!” you bit sarcastically, sweat beading along your brow. You’d been at this for well over an hour now, hour two fast approaching with no progress. You’d successfully shadow-walked, though Cyclops noted your hesitation to do so. But could he blame you? The idea of shadow-walking and then suddenly not having the strength to pull yourself back together, or whatever it was you did, was quite frankly, terrifying. 
Scott sighed, placing a hand on his hip and running the other through his hair. “Alright, take ten, I’ll talk to the Professor.” He said, already making his way towards the iron doors. You let loose a frustrated breath, bracing your hands across the back of your neck. This was hopeless. Utterly hopeless. What’s worse, is that there was no proof you could actually do those things. No proof that was the Professor was saying was fucking true. 
You were glad the back wall was cast in shadow as you stormed across the floor, sending your fist careening into the metalwork, instantly regretting your outburst when the crack of your split knuckles rang out louder than the punch itself. Clamping your lips between your teeth to stop yourself from crying out, you let yourself breathe through the pain, savouring it just slightly. It was good. Pain was good. It reminded you how you weren’t just a pile of shadows wandering aimlessly through the air yet. You doubted you could feel a broken hand if you didn’t have a hand to feel with. 
Turning your back to the wall, you slid down to the floor, head buried between your knees with your arms casing you in, throbbing hand gripping your opposite shoulder tightly. You wouldn’t cry. You would. Not. Cry. That wasn’t you. You don’t cry. Since when did you cry?
This was how Logan found you. He’d been stuck in a meeting with Xavier and Storm all morning, going over the blueprints of the latest rescue mission the team would embark on. Though in all honesty, he was barely listening, his thoughts disobediently drifting back to you. The memory of your smile, the teasing lilt in your voice, the way your arms felt wrapped around his neck, the scent of your hair invading his heightened nose. He wondered how you were getting on with Scott, and he pitied the fact you were having to do this with Scott. That was until the man of the hour walked through the doors, disrupting the meeting and finally releasing him back into the world. 
It’s no wonder his feet led him straight to you, you’d been on his mind that much. So to see you like this, curled up against the opposite wall, your hand an angry red, it tugged at his heart. 
You didn’t seem to notice him as he crossed the room, only looking up when he kicked the gym mat with his foot. There was that smile again. The one that didn’t reach your eyes and only serve to fool people who were fucking idiots into thinking you were okay. 
The last person you expected to see walk through those doors was Logan. Last you’d heard, he was stuck in a meeting with Charles and Ororo. Scott was initially furious he’d been asked to help develop your mutation instead of intent ‘crucial strategy meetings’ so he called them, but he soon lightened up when you not-so-subtly reminded him it’s because Charles thought he was the best option to help you. 
You sighed heavily, bracing your good hand on your knee as you rose to your feet. For Logan to see you in such a sorry state wasn’t high on your list of priorities. You were pretty sure it wasn’t on that list at all. 
“Not goin’ well?” he asked softly, and you had to grit your teeth to stop yourself from tearing up. You watched his eyes flicker from your face to your hand, thick brows pinching in concern. You followed his line of sight, not that you needed to, you could fucking feel your knuckles pulsing fire up your arm. 
“Uh, no, not really. I’d love to say I did this punching Scott, but he left before I could, so I took it out on the wall instead.” You half smiled, and Logan found himself blowing out a huff of laughter. Even in this state, in this mindset, you could still find humour. 
Sinking your hand into the shadows across the wall behind you, you felt the familiar tingle of, what you now know was your body breaking apart, before the slight itch of pulling it back together as you dragged it back out, good as new. 
Logan thought for a moment, hazel eyes flicking from you to the shadows behind you. “Have you tried–”
“If you’re about to say ‘concentrating harder’ I might have to hurt you.” You interrupted, much to his amusement.
“I’m assumin’ that’s what Scott said?”
“Word for fucking word,” you said with a slight lopsided smile. Now that one reached your eyes. 
Logan took a few steps forward, now borderline pinning you against the wall. If it wasn’t for his hearing, he would have missed the way your breath hitched slightly, the slight shudder in your exhale. He chalked it down to your apprehension toward your situation. He had to. Giving himself hope like that just led to a shit load of hurt.
“What I was goin’ to say, was have ya tried from in there?” he raised a brow, his eyes looking past you and at the wall behind, and you had to take a minute to remember what you were talking about, his proximity all but throwing all and any thought out the window. It was achingly familiar to yesterday in the kitchen.
“You might be onto something…” you breathed when you remembered how to form words. Now you were thinking about it, he could be right. Why on earth were you trying to call the shadows to you, when you could drag them out with you? However, the idea of once again disappearing into shadow didn’t fill you with the same sense of freedom it once did. 
And Logan could see it. The hesitation, apprehension. You’d told him you were scared last night, but this was the first time he’d seen it. “I’ll be right here, yeah?” Fuck the way you looked at him shattered his heart. You wanted to be brave, you wanted to have the same sense of wonder you always did when it came to your mutation. He looked at the clench of your jaw, the flare of your nostrils as you nodded. 
“Alright… don’t go anywhere.” you half-joked, sliding your hands down the cool wall behind you, feeling your skin tingle at the mere idea of disappearing into the darkness. 
“Where would I go? You’re right here.” Logan responded, placing his index finger on the centre of your forehead and pushing ever so slightly. It gave you enough courage to fall back into the darkness, feeling the release of those threads holding your corporeal body together. 
Logan wasn’t really sure why he said that and he hoped to fuck you were too nervous about this whole thing to actually register what he’d said. He breathed out a sigh of relief when he watched you fold into the shadow, taking a few steps back and looking at his watch. Any longer than three minutes and he’ll start to think this was a really bad idea. Though, he probably should have told you that before you disappeared. 
Fuck.
It was always a strange sensation. Your consciousness was still intact, but the rest of your body had disappeared, scattered into a million different pieces. Probably billions. You couldn’t see, but you didn’t need to. You could sense. Sense the layout of the room. Sense where the shadows begin and where they end. Everything became nothing, and it was freedom. Quieting your thoughts, you concentrated. Concentrated on pulling. It was the same itching sensation you felt when leaving the shadows, except you tried to ground yourself.
Ground yourself in a place that had literally no ground.
This was fucking impossible.
You felt yourself slipping, the shadows around you not knowing what it was you were asking. Did the shadows have consciousness too? You didn’t know. Who fucking knew? And you didn’t fucking care. You tried to concentrate again, pulling against those threads you used to bring yourself from one place to the other toward you.
And only succeeding in moving again. Walking. This was no fucking different to what you’ve always done. Just moving from one point to the next. You’d already fucking mastered that. 
But at least one good thing had come from this. You weren’t afraid anymore. 
You were fucking angry.
Your consciousness writhed like a ball of angry vipers, pulling at all and any threads you could sense around you, flicking from one place to another with no rhyme or reason, no direction. 
If you could scream, you would have done. If you could lash out, you would have done. Rage rippled through your senses, those threads around you thrashing and flailing. Useless. Fucking useless. Maybe this was the fate you deserved. Disappearing into nothing, being nothing. Maybe you did deserve it. 
But you wouldn’t fucking accept it. Not yet.
This is “–fucking POINTLESS!” you roared, stepping from the shadow, your body itching all over, buzzing with adrenaline, your back almost burning. Your eyes took time to adjust to the light again, but you were too furious to register anything. “What’s the fucking point? Nothing works! I can’t pull them toward me, I can’t pull them with me, this is fucking stupid!” you continued your tirade, almost feeling the physical weight of your failure heavy upon your shoulders. “I can’t fucking do it, so why bother trying? It’s been a day and I’m already sick of this shit!” you heaved, breath searing your newly formed lungs, sending shockwaves of fire through your shoulder blades. You couldn’t remember a time when you’d been this angry. “If this stupid fucking mutation doesn’t kill me I’ll do it myself I swear to fucking god and what the FUCK are you smiling at Logan?!” You bellowed, your eyes finally registering what they were seeing. 
Logan had probably the world’s most gorgeous smile, and you wished you weren’t too pissed off to appreciate it. But before he had time to answer, Scott and Charles entered the room, Scott dropped a mug of what looked like freshly brewed coffee straight onto the floor, the shattering of the ceramic lingering in the air as the room fell deadly silent. 
“What?” you asked, now slightly fearful as the three men peered at you, each with a different expression. Scott seemed utterly horrified, his jaw slack and agape. Charles looked almost smug, a knowing smile pulling at his lips. And Logan?
Logan just grinned at you, arms folded across his chest. “You did it,” he whispered, nodding to what you thought was the wall behind you. Your eyes lingered on his as you turned your head, finally looking at what everyone else in the room seemed to be seeing. 
Honestly, you were fucking shocked you didn’t notice. At least now the burning in your shoulder blades had an explanation. 
Two broad, rippling wings of pure shadow spread wide from your back, the darkness almost pulsing along with your rapid heartbeat. It felt good, and you noted the lack of pressure about your body. Those threads that seemed constantly under strain had loosened, seemingly constantly fed by the shadows at your back. 
You slowly pulled at the strings, watching the wings move and shift with your intentions. Your fury dissolved as you watched in complete awe, along with the three others in the room. They folded close to your back and you felt the buzzing of energy against your leg, before you extended them again to their full size, tips grazing either side of the room. 
“Wh… H-how?” Scott managed to stutter, taking a cautious step forward. You looked from your shadows to Cyclops. 
“It, uh, it was Logan’s idea. Pull them out with me rather than trying to pull them towards me…” you were still reeling, slowly extending your fingers before trying to move the rest of your body. You didn’t know how much concentration it was taking to keep them intact, and you were a little afraid of letting them slip. Your breath came heavy as if you’d run around the estate at least four times. 
Logan looked back at Scott, unable to help his ‘fuck you’ brow raise. And to his satisfaction, Scott clicked his tongue in irritation. He turned back to you when he heard your slight laugh, clearly having noticed the silent exchange between them.
“How did you even know about this?” Scott asked accusingly.
“She told me.” Logan retorted as if it was the most obvious response on the planet. Scott just stood there in shock.
“She… she told you? She told you. As in, the one over there?” Cyclops pointed at you and you flipped him off in return.
“Yeah? Who else would we be talkin’ ‘bout?”
“It’s just, she doesn’t tend to… do that,”
“She is right fucking here!” you held your arms up, gesturing to yourself in a way that thankfully returned the boys’ attention back to the situation at hand. 
“Yeah well, this is all well and good,” Scott continued, crouching now to pick up the larger pieces of the shattered mug, “but how do you release them?” he finished. 
He had a point. You couldn’t wander around the school with two giant wings stuck to your back, as much as you wanted to. How would you get through the doorways? Xavier wheeled forward until he was next to Logan, his face now much more serious.
“Carefully. Release it too quickly and the threads could go with them,”
“Wouldn’t that just mean she would be back in the shadow?” Logan asked, slight concern lacing his baritone voice. There was a catch here, and every single one of you knew it. 
“Ordinarily yes, however, she cannot disappear into her own shadow. If she releases those threads anywhere other than back to its original form, there’s a risk of her disappearing with it and getting stuck,” He explained, to nobody’s understanding. You knew you couldn’t disappear into your own shadow, you’d tried before and your body simply wouldn’t let you. 
“So wait… I can pull the shadow with me but have to return it to where it was, essentially?” you asked, slowly so that your question could be understood, even by yourself. Charles nodded, and you took a deep breath in an attempt to calm yourself. 
Logan couldn’t help but feel partly to blame for this. He’d encouraged you to take this step, to try alternate methods of developing your mutation, and now he had, you were stuck like this until you felt sure you could release it carefully. Shit.
‘She made it this far because of you. We have a chance at changing her fate because of you, Logan. You cannot regret that.’ It was always jarring when the Professor found his way into his head, and it wasn’t the least bit soothing. What did ease him a little, however, was your slight reassuring smile, renewed with confidence. 
You could see he was battling with guilt, terrified that he may have endangered you. But you could do this. You’d already managed to achieve something you never thought you could today, what’s one more miracle?
“Hooookay, let’s try this… carefully, right?” it was a rhetorical question because honestly? You were a little scared, and stalling seemed to give you time to collect your thoughts and calm your slightly stuttering heart.
“Carefully,” Charles instructed, and you nodded once before taking another deep breath. Holding it for a few moments, you tightened the threads you hoped to fuck were holding you together, keeping them in place before blowing out the breath, releasing your connection to the wings behind your back. You felt them bleed down your shoulders, shivering slightly as the shadows snaked down your legs and back against the wall behind you, returning to their original state. 
You’d closed your eyes at some point, honestly, you couldn’t remember when. You were scared to open them, scared to see if you’d fucked anything up, if parts of your body were just completely shadow, or whether you had accidentally grown multiple limbs or something. You knew your mind was running away from you, but you couldn’t help it, as ridiculous as it felt.
Logan smiled slightly to himself as he watched the shadows wash away and return to the wall, and that inward smile broadened when he noticed you weren’t moving, eyes clenched shut, your hands balled into fists, your shoulders tensed and hunched. He stepped forward and up to you, gently bracing his hands on either side of your neck, thumbs angling your jaw up a little. Your soft gasp didn’t escape his ears.
“Y’alright?” He asked, eyes searching your face before finding your own gaze, your lids having fluttered open. You visibly relaxed, one hand that was previously balled into a tight fist now gently sliding up his wrist, resting atop his forearm. Your touch was electric, fingertips sending shivers down his spine. 
“Fine, I think,” you responded, gliding your nails through the hair on his arm. It was an absent response to his touch. You wanted to be closer to him, to bury your head in the crook of his neck and breathe in his pinewood scent. His breath was a mix of mint and tobacco, and you wondered if his lips had a permanent hint of whiskey if you were to taste them, having been told by a grumbling Jean that was who the hidden, half-empty bottle in the cupboard belonged to.
You instantly mourned the loss of his touch when he stepped back, though you were grateful he did. You’d been dangerously close to kissing him, and whilst you still wanted to, perhaps not without an audience of Charles and Scott.
“How are you feeling?” You blinked when the Professor addressed you directly, having forgotten what living in reality was like for a few moments. Nodding along with an answer you hadn’t voiced yet, you grinned along with a deep, contorting rumble of your stomach.
“Apparently, starving.” A chuckle escaped your lips and you braced a hand against your stomach in an attempt to soothe away the uncomfortable feeling of hunger. 
“I think that’s enough for today. Logan, could you take this one to the kitchen? Make sure she’s fed.” There was a knowing look in Professor Xavier’s eye that Logan wasn’t sure he liked. Sure, he may have just lovingly held your face whilst bringing you back from the brink of terror, but that didn’t mean there was anything going on between the two of you. You met yesterday!
“Sure.” he shrugged, trying his damnest to sound nonchalant about it. You stretched your arms up above your head, popping your elbows slightly as you followed Logan from the room, feeling a thousand times lighter than you did when you entered two hours ago. Honestly, you couldn’t believe you’d succeeded. 
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The doors closed behind you with a soft swish, and you paused to appreciate the man walking ahead of you. You’d known each other for less than twenty-four hours, and yet you’d tear the fabric of the universe apart to ensure his safety. You knew almost nothing about him, and yet you felt the strangest pull towards him, a yearning to be around him, to be near him. It was infuriating, but so fucking exciting at the same time. Could this maybe be something? Did he feel this weird connection too? Or was it just your delusions working overtime? Honestly, hard to say.
“Take a picture, it’d last longer.”
You snapped from your daze to notice he’d turned back to you, realising you weren’t following him. Flashing him a broad smile, refusing to feel any kind of embarrassment that he’d caught you practically staring at him, you jogged a little to catch up, effortlessly falling into step beside him.
“Wanted to thank you,” you looked up at him through the corner of your eye, catching his own gaze. 
“What for?”
“Everything. Logan, I’ve known you for less than a full day and you’ve already helped me more than people I’ve known practically my whole life. The Professor excluded. So yeah, thanks.” You shrugged, hitting the button on the lift to take you both back up to the ground floor. The doors closed and you leaned against the back wall, crossing one ankle over the other. 
“You need better friends if you’re thankin’ me for anythin’. Wouldn’t anyone else do the same?” he asked, mirroring your stance against the adjacent wall, folding his arms across his chest. You snorted a laugh, and he found himself smiling at you.
“Yeah, friends would, but like I said, we haven’t even known each other a full twenty-four hours yet.”
Logan cocked a brow, his smile morphing back to a small smirk. “Well pardon me, princess, I thought we were friends.” 
You rolled your eyes, and Logan had a horrendous feeling he’d misread the entire situation between you. “I mean like, lifelong friends, asshole. People I’ve known ever since I can remember. Not people I met yesterday,” you finished, gently kicking his foot with your own. Logan straightened up as the lift slowed to reach the ground floor, softly flicking your forehead in response to your kick, causing you to bat his hand away.
“Yeah, well, what can I say? You made an impact,” he shrugged, and you grinned.
“Oh yeah?”
“Don’t let it get to your head, bub. I’m just sayin’ you show up after not existin’ and immediately cause trouble.” he watched your expression shift from mischievous to a sheepish pout, unable to beat the trouble-maker allegations. He sighed slightly. “But hey, maybe I like trouble.” The doors opened for the both of you to leave, Logan being the first to make his exit. Though, you stayed behind for a beat.
“Or maybe trouble just likes you,” you retorted with that same lopsided smile he’d come to admire so much, before pushing back against the wall to join him. 
“Yeah well, ‘m’not mad about it either way,” he mumbled, and you thought better about teasing him for it. You imagined this was about as close as he was gonna get to voicing genuine care for you, so you let it drop, simply humming a thoughtful smile in response. 
You don’t know why you were expecting the kitchen to have a few people in it, since classes were currently going on. Maybe it was due to the fact you hadn’t exactly settled back into the life of a teacher yet. Not that you were a teacher anymore, the man currently rifling through the snacks cupboard had seen to that. You found, with no small degree of surprise, that you missed it. You missed teaching combat and strategy, you missed taking the kids through training drills and exercise routines. You missed helping them hone their mutations, with Jean’s help, or Ororo’s help. Sure, the worry of them getting hurt always used to play on your mind, but now you were back, you realised that the worry was worth the fulfilment. 
Taking a seat at the table, you propped your chin up on the heel of your palm, watching as Logan crouched to one of the cupboards below the counter. You didn’t pretend like you weren’t enjoying the view. He really did look fantastic for one hundred and thirty. In peak physical condition.
“I’d say take a picture again but I’d really rather you didn’t,” you were too focused shamelessly staring at his ass you hadn’t noticed he was peering at you over his shoulder with a not-so-subtle smirk. You flashed one right back.
You were coming to like that phrase. “I wouldn’t be opposed,” you retorted, wiggling your brows up and down. Logan snorted a laugh. 
“You flirt with everyone like this?”
You shook your head, moving to rest your chin on top of your now interlaced fingers. “Nah, only with the ones over ninety. I have a thing for older men,” you winked and he rolled his eyes.
“Stop,” but judging from his expression, Logan was finding this just as amusing as you were. But as much as you wanted to continue, your curiosity got the better of you.
“What’re you looking for?” you asked, standing from your seat at the table and skirting around the wood to sit on the edge closer to him, peering down over his shoulder. 
“There used to be a packet of insta-noodles in here somewhere but I think one of the kids got to it first,” he explained, and you gasped dramatically, to the point where he actually looked a little concerned over his shoulder. “What?”
“Insta-noodles? My brother in Christ, please tell me you were not about to give me instant fucking noodles?” you felt something in you die at the thought, and something else died at his affirming nod.
“Yeah, what's wrong with that?” he asked, genuinely perplexed by your reaction. It was just noodles for fuck’s sake, it wasn’t like he’d just offered to kick a baby. He blinked at your barked laugh of disbelief, watching as you hopped off the table and shooed him aside.
“Step back fossil–”
“Hey!”
“and let me do this. We’re going to actually have food. Like, real food. Take a seat or watch and learn.” You shot him a look over your shoulder, before gathering whatever ingredients you needed. Logan dragged one of the chairs back from the table, taking a seat to watch whatever it was you were about to make. 
You started by dicing an onion, a pan with oil already heating up on the gas stove, and it took all of three minutes for Logan to be impressed by your knife skills. You almost wielded the thing like a dagger, flipping it this way and that, before scooping half the pile of onion and dropping it into a plastic bowl. The other half you scraped into the pan, and Logan couldn’t help but savour the sound of the sizzle and the smell of food. Suddenly, he too was starving.
You crossed to the fridge, rummaging around the bottom shelf before pulling out a tub of minced beef, and a packet of mushrooms. Closing the door with your hip, you lay the ingredients out on the counter, pulling open the cupboard above your head to retrieve a box of breadcrumbs and a carton of eggs. Though he saw you pause briefly, turning your head back to him.
“You’re not vegetarian or vegan, right? Probably should have asked yesterday,” your question made him laugh, and you tilted your head to the side. “What?”
“Do I look vegan to you?”
You stuck your tongue in your cheek to stop yourself from smiling. No, no he didn’t. But at the same time, you’d made a similar mistake in the past. And it still haunts you to this day.
“Just answer the question, Lo’” you grit, placing a hand on your hip. Logan blinked, trying his best to get past the nickname you’d just given him. Usually, nicknames were his thing, having about a million different ones for a million different circumstances. He barely managed to shake his head, earning himself a smile of gratitude from you, before you turned back to your task at hand and he could settle himself with his brow pinched between his thumb and forefinger.
You crouched again, rifling through the cupboard with cans. Pushing a stack of soup to the side, you froze solid, your eyes blowing wide as your hand shook at what you saw. Another mug, though someone had gone to great lengths to hide this one. Your fingertips grazed the faded image, a photograph of a younger-looking you and a girl with fair features, her braids tied back at the top of her head. Her smile was brilliant. Dazzling. It took you a moment to will your blurring vision away, before inhaling deeply and bringing out the chopped tomatoes you’d been looking for, setting it to the side. Taking a moment to push her from your mind whilst stirring the slowly browning onions, you then cross to fill the kettle, flicking the switch to start boiling. Logan blew out a breath, having recovered from his heart stuttering and finally went back to watching you cook. 
It was calming, almost hypnotic, the way you moved about the kitchen. Folding the onions in with the beef mince, breadcrumbs and two eggs. Only, it just occurred to him he had no fucking clue what you were making. Standing from his seat, he moved over to lean his shoulder against the fridge door, now having a clear line of sight to watch what you were doing.
“What’re you making?” he asked, smiling slightly as you startled. He didn’t mean to scare you, he just honestly didn’t realise how deep into the process you were. 
“Meatball Marinara,” you answered, your fingers incorporating the ingredients in the bowl until you were left with a sticky, meaty lump you could form balls out of. 
“From scratch?” he asked, eyes slightly wide. You’d spoken at length about your cooking last night, and how you’d learned, and it wasn’t that he didn’t believe you, it was more that he didn’t quite realise how impressive it was until he was here, watching you. 
He swore, your smile could start and end wars.
“It’s pretty quick and easy, to be honest,” you explained, eyes never leaving your task despite feeling his own trained on you. You grabbed the salt from the spice rack, twisting the grinder a few times until you felt it was right. That was what a lot of cooking was for you. Just feeling. When you felt something was done, you’d take it from the oven. When you felt something needed a little more seasoning, you’d sprinkle some paprika in for an extra kick. Nothing was ever done by the book. 
It’s mainly why you didn’t exactly get on with Scott.
“Huh…” Logan responded, watching how you’d started to take small portions of the beef and roll it into little balls, placing them onto a separate plate. 
“Could you give the onions a quick stir? ‘ve got meat hands,” you wiggled your slightly shining fingers in his face, and he jerked back, much to your amusement. Logan fought the urge to flick your forehead again, settling on ignoring your evil little laugh and instead focussing on his critical mission of stirring onions. 
“D’ya cook like this when you were away?” he asked, finding an insane amount of domestic comfort in cooking with you. He saw you shake your head out of his peripheral vision. 
“Nah, didn’t have time, plus I was moving around a lot. Usually, it was quicker and easier things than this,”
“Like insta-noodles?”
You could fucking hear his smirk, and you managed to stop yourself from cracking an egg over his head. “No. Never insta-noodles. Ever.”
You’d finished making little meatballs and had started splitting apart a bulb of garlic, crushing the cloves beneath your knife before peeling off the skin and dicing them before dropping them into the pan he was still stirring. His eyes closed involuntarily as you leaned across him, once again your scent hitting him like a freight train, only this time your shampoo had blended with the sweet, slightly musky smell of your sweat. It was enough to drive him fucking feral. 
“Keep stirring that, or it’ll stick to the bottom and burn,” you instructed absently, halfway through chopping up a few mushrooms before leaning across him again to drop them into the pan as well. Logan held the spoon like it was his lifeline, knuckles draining white as you moved around him to retrieve another pan.
“Yes ma’am,” he responded, and you snorted another laugh. He really had to pull himself together. 
You poured the boiled water from the kettle into the new pan, lighting the burner and setting it on a high heat, bringing the water roiling before grinding salt for what Logan felt was far too long. He wondered vaguely if you had high sodium levels, or how your blood pressure was. You waited again for the water to come back to a boil, before placing a sizeable amount of spaghetti into the pan, putting slight pressure on the tips so the ends would soften and bend faster in the water. 
Placing the lid over the pan, you went to check your watch. Your watch that you weren’t wearing. Fucking goddamnit. You looked around for a clock, before noticing Logan’s wrist. 
Logan’s soul nearly left his body at the way you grabbed his hand, twisting his wrist to make a note of the time. You weren’t exactly rough, but it was assertive enough for him to think twice about the kinds of things he was into…
Wait, what the fuck was he talking about?
“You could’ve just asked the time,” he muttered, tugging his wrist back almost possesively. 
“Hm?” you blinked. In truth, you’d been utterly lost in how good this felt. How right it felt to just do average, mundane tasks with him. “Oh, right, yeah, sorry. Could you tell me when ten minutes have passed?” you asked, almost instantly busying yourself again by carefully dropping the meatballs into the pan he was stirring. “Gotta brown off the meat first…” you instructed softly, almost absently. But he listened, slowing his movements. Your resulting smile was radiant. “Hey, you’re a natural!”
Logan raised a brow. “I’m stirring a pan, bub. Not exactly gourmet style.” You laughed, gently hitting his bicep with the back of your hand, only to stop in your tracks, shaking your knuckles out. 
“Ow! I thought you said your bones were made of adamantium,” you exclaimed, rubbing over the back of your hand with your other palm. In truth, it didn’t really hurt, but you just wanted to make a point because nobody has the right to be this built. It was insane.
Logan bit his tongue to stop from smiling, his eyes sliding from that pan to you. “Just the result of a good workout regime,” he shrugged as if it were nothing special. In reality, he knew he looked good. He put a lot of work into his physique, and whilst his mutation did help with that, it was still nice to be complimented on it once in a while. 
“Huh… you don’t say,” you responded, cracking open the can of tomatoes once the meatballs had browned to your satisfaction. The metal sizzled slightly as you poured in the sauce, setting the can to the side and retrieving a few basil leaves from the window box on the opposite side of the room. Logan hadn’t noticed it before, remarkably, and though having no experience with plants in recent history, something told him he wouldn’t have too much trouble identifying what they were.
It was a weird feeling. Remembering something he didn’t actually remember. Though it had been the story of his life for the last few years. 
You dropped the leaves into the sauce, leaving him to stir the pot whilst you brought out two sets of plates and cutlery and set them on the counter, angling your head so you could catch sight of the time from the watch on his wrist. He would have just told you if he didn’t think you were deriving some kind of joy from attempting to read his watch sideways.
Removing the lid from the pan, you scooped up a single piece of spaghetti, blowing away the steam before dropping it into your hand when you thought it was cool enough. You shot him a quick look Logan could only describe as pure mischief, before throwing the spaghetti against the backsplash of the stove. He watched as the pasta hit the wall with a sick squelch, before sliding down the tiles. 
He looked back at you, and you almost instantly burst into fits of laughter. “The fuck was that for?” he asked, his brows furrowed in perplexion. 
You managed to recover from laughing, though hiccuped through a few giggles. “You can tell whether spaghetti’s done by throwing it at the wall. If it sticks, it’s raw, if it slides, it’s done,” you exclaimed, tilting your head to get another look at the time, noting that those ten minutes were up.
“Really?” 
“Nah, that’s an old wive’s tale. Honestly, it’s just kinda fun to pelt spaghetti at a wall and call it ‘cooking’.” You sent him a wink, and Logan shook his head in fond disbelief. He felt like he’d seen so many sides to you in the last twenty-four hours alone. And if he was being completely honest with himself, he wanted to see more. He wanted to see how many sides to you there were, and whether he would like them all as much as he liked the ones he’s already seen. Your fury included.
“Your ten minutes it up, by the way,” he reminded you, and though he had a feeling you already knew, you nodded in thanks anyway, removing the boiling pan from the stove and flicking off the burner, the blue gas flames retreated to nothing. Skirting around him to the sink, you tipped out the water, using the lid of the pan to stop the rest of the spaghetti from falling with it. You shook the pan slightly, shaking out any pieces that had stuck together, before setting about separating the contents into two portions, one slightly bigger than the other. 
“How’s it looking?” you asked, leaning back to take a look at the sauce. If Logan had to grit his teeth after smelling your scent one more time his jaw would fucking snap. You really weren’t making this easy on him, were you? Part of him wondered if you were doing it deliberately, but there was no way of you knowing about his heightened senses. Unless you’d asked around, which, with everything you’ve had going on since you got back, he sincerely doubted. 
“Looks good to me, but I’m not the expert here,” he handed you the spoon, stepping to the side for you to take over. Your fingers brushed his as you took it, and he tried his fucking best to ignore the slight buzz you’d left. 
Lifting the spoon to your lips, you sampled what you’d been slaving over for the last twenty minutes, smiling slightly as the sweet, tarty flavours burst on your tongue. It was a new sensation for Logan to wish he was a spoon, but here he was. 
“Perfect!” you beamed, dipping the spoon back in the sauce and turning to him, your palm cupped beneath the wood to prevent anything from spilling onto the floor. “Wanna try it?”
Logan shrugged, stepping forward and allowing you to bring the spoon to his lips. Your eyes never left his, the tips of your fingers grazing the coarse stubble beneath his chin, but you didn’t move away. He struggled to focus on anything other than how close you were to him, the feeling of your fingers on his jaw, your breath fanning the lower half of his face. Your hopeful eyes waiting eagerly for his verdict, searching his expression for any kind of clue. And he was suddenly afraid of what you’d find there. 
Stepping back, he pretended like he was savouring what you’d fed him, and whilst it was fucking delicious, it didn’t compare to how he imagined your lips tasting. Or anything else, for that matter. 
“‘S’really good,” he managed, and you immediately looked as if you weren’t waiting with bated breath for his approval.
“Isn’t it? Fuck I’m good,” your laugh was more akin to an evil mastermind than someone who’d just made meatballs, but Logan would be hard-pressed to find another time in his life when he felt this at peace with the world. At least, not in the life he could remember. “Sit, I’ll bring it over,” you instructed, removing a larger, metal spoon from the drawer, which he took off you the moment he could.
“Pretty sure it’s supposed to be the other way ‘round, bub. You cooked,” he glanced pointedly to the seat you’d just gestured to. But clearly, you were, amongst many other things, incredibly stubborn. 
“Not sure how you worked that one out, you cooked too,” you folded your arms across your chest, setting your jaw. 
“Yeah, barely. Sit your ass down,” he pointed to the chair with the spoon in his hand, but you still refused, now leaning against the counter as if you could get any further away from the table. Logan sighed heavily, placing the spoon down again. “Didn’t wanna have to do this…” he muttered, and you didn’t have the chance to ask what he meant by this before his arms were around your waist and you were lifted effortlessly off the ground. 
All breath fled from your lungs. Your hands instantly fell to his shoulders, nails clinging on for dear life as he carried you to that godforsaken chair. His grip around your body tightened as you attempted to wriggle free from his arms, laughing breathlessly, exhilaration coursing through your body. Only, the moment he tried to set you down, you did a complete 180 and wrapped your arms around his neck, your legs around his waist.
“Let go,” his words were muffled against your neck as he bent almost double, and you leaned back until you were practically hovering above the chair.
“Seemed like a good idea a minute ago, huh?” You arched a cocky brow and were met with an expression mirroring your own. 
“So you gonna cling to me forever? That your genius plan?”
“If that's what it takes,” 
“Let go,” the way he said your name almost had you falling to the floor, your muscles suddenly growing weak. But you stayed strong, out of nothing but principal at this point. He wasn’t even holding you anymore, you were clinging on through sheer willpower alone. For the sake of being stubborn.
“You made this bed, now lie in it,” you responded haughtily, refusing to look into his irritated façade.
“That doesn’t make any goddamn sense,” he growled, and you fucking melted. That wasn’t fucking fair, and judging by the steadily growing smirk, he knew it. His hands gripped both your calves, successfully peeling you from his waist whilst you were distracted. You had no choice but to let your legs fall to the floor, catching yourself on the chair behind you, much to his triumphant grin. 
“You cheated!” you gaped, sitting cross-legged on the seat. Logan barely looked over his shoulder as he started spooning the sauce onto the two piles of pasta. All that over fucking spaghetti. And you didn’t even regret it a little.
“How’d I cheat?” he asked, though you were aware he knew full well how. And you were right. He did know. Of course he knew. He’d used that specific voice countless times before. Usually under very different circumstances. He just wanted to hear you say it. Hear you say how it affected you. 
But, true to form, you were stubborn.
“You’re stronger than I am,” you sighed, glaring heated daggers into the back of his head. You wanted to be petty, to stand up and take the spoon from him again, but in all honesty, you don’t think you’d survive another round of ‘sit on the fucking chair’.
Logan looked at you over his shoulder, his eyes swirling with knowing, and you stuck your tongue in your cheek and looked away, not giving him any satisfaction of confirming what he was thinking. You’d been so caught up in avoiding eye contact, that you almost jumped when he set the plate down in front of you, setting his own at the opposite place. At least he’d had the sense to realise the large portion was for him. Credit where credit was due, you guessed.
A comfortable silence blanketed the kitchen as he took a seat, two glasses of water in his hands, and you smiled a thank you. If you had your brother to thank for anything, it was teaching you how to cook. Well, it was many more things than that, but at this moment, it was cooking lessons. He didn’t want you going into the world with the culinary skills of a carrot. His words, not yours. 
You had a feeling Logan was a hard man to impress, so listening to his small grunt of appreciation was music to your ears. “Told ya I was a good chef,” you beamed after swallowing a mouthful and taking a large sip of water. 
Logan nodded in agreement. It wasn’t like he could disagree, the proof was right there, in front of him, in his fucking mouth for fuck’s sake. And the peace pesto from last night. Though he was glad his metabolism was fast. Pasta two days in a row can’t be good for anyone. “Never said you weren’t,” your expression fell from pride to scowling in seconds, and the corner of his mouth quirked up. “You’re a fantastic chef.”
Your eyes narrowed as you searched for any hint of dishonesty, but you came up short. Though he said it as if to placate you, something told you he really meant it. You were just playing around, in all honesty, teasing in order to forget what just happened between you, and you’d gotten so much more than you bargained for. 
Much like the other night, you both fell into comfortable, mundane conversation, finding refuge in how fucking normal everything felt right now. You laughed and smiled as if the threat of disappearing into nothing didn’t constantly hang above your head, and he teased and joked as if the weight of his forgotten life didn’t constantly burden his shoulders. You could get used to this. Dangerously used to this. 
Logan was completely enamoured by you, once again finding himself encapsulated by the way you talk, from moments where you get really into whatever story you’re telling, to quieter moments when you let the conversation settle. If he was to die tomorrow, unlikely but worth entertaining from time to time, it was moments like these he was sure would flash through his mind. 
“What about you? I’ve talked your ear off about my life but you never talk about yours. Though, I guess there’s a lot to talk about,” you mused thoughtfully, twisting your fork through your spaghetti, or whatever was left of it. Logan grunted, shifting in his seat to lean against the back of the chair.
“It’s not a happy story,” he admitted quietly, buying himself some time by taking a long glass of water. Your gentle eyes found his, a soft smile pulling at the corners of your lips.
“I’m not looking for a fairytale. Just who you are,” you fought the urge to reach across the table and slip your hand into his. Though you didn’t want to push him to divulge anything, you just didn’t wanna feel like the whole conversation was one-sided. Sure, he would chime in with a few anecdotes but mainly it was just asking you questions. 
If he was being honest with himself, Logan wasn’t sure he wanted to tell you anything about his past. He knew you wouldn’t judge, clearly having seen a fair amount of bullshit yourself, and the fact that it simply wasn’t who you were. No, his problem lay with the fact that he didn’t want to dampen your spirit with his sob story of a past. How he only remembers through thrashing nightmares, waking up soaked in sweat, heart racing. You didn’t need to know any of that. 
“Alright… I–” he began before quite literally being saved by the bell. Logan looked at his watch, brows raising at how easily time had once again run away with the two of you. You blinked, looking around as if you could find the bell and ask it personally why it was going off so early before the echoing of ongoing conversation shattered the domestic delusion you’d both managed to trick yourselves into feeling.
“Another time,” you stood from the table, leaning over to grab his plate, but he swatted your hand away and instead took your own. 
“Never learn, do ya?” he asked with a slight smile, and you rolled your eyes. With a heavy, defeated sigh, you conceded, simply allowing him to take your plate to the sink. Stretching your arms high above your head, you popped your stiff shoulders, turning your head as two students you knew well entered the kitchen.
“You made meatballs?! No fair, I wanted some!” Jubilee whined, her books still clasped against her chest. Artie stuck out his forked tongue, much like a snake would taste the air around it before his curious face morphed into a frown. It seemed he too wouldn’t have minded meatballs. 
Logan looked over his shoulder at the two newcomers, his eyes darting between you and them, your guilt written all over your face.
“I’ll make them for you again sometime soon. We could have one of those big dinners we used to do, remember those?” you asked, your eyes alight with hope. Logan had heard of those. Apparently, you used to cook for the whole mansion, and the students would drag tables and chairs from all different rooms and have a huge feast together. Of course, he didn’t believe a word anybody said about it, since he was convinced you were a figment of everyone’s collective imagination, but now he knew you very much did exist, he could envision you dancing around the kitchen for hours on end, preparing dish after dish.
Jubilee’s face lit up at the suggestion, her hand hitting Artie’s arm excitedly. “Seriously? You mean that? We’ve missed doing that so much. Nobody cooks the way you do!” She bounced on her toes, before whirling and darting from the room, most likely to tell the rest of her friends. Artie lingered for a few seconds, clearly not knowing whether he wanted to stay or to race after Jubilee, before he too turned on his heel and ran after her. You chuckled softly, running a hand through your hair.
“What’ve I gotten myself into…?” you muttered, startling slightly as a hand rested on your shoulder. You looked up at Logan, unable to accurately decipher his expression. All you knew was that it was soft. Softer than you’d seen in the last day or so. 
“Were y’always this good with em? The kids?” he asked, and you huffed a laugh. You wished you could say yes, absolutely, you’d always been naturally gifted at looking after children. But that wasn’t the truth. 
“Fuck no. Used to hate kids, to be honest with you. Thought they were annoying as fuck when I first started,” you admitted slightly sheepishly. “But, they grew on me. Still not a fan of like, other kids, but any who come to this school? Love ‘em.” 
“Makes me wonder why they sent you ‘round America and not someone more suited.” his eyes glinted with mischief and you lightly elbowed his ribs.
“I can be incredibly persuasive.” 
“That so?”
“Mmmhm,” you nodded emphatically, stepping out of his range and immediately missing the warmth of his palm on your shoulder. You hadn’t even noticed he’d left it there until you moved away and hopped onto the table, your feet dangling slightly. He didn’t take his eyes off you, scanning your face as though he was considering you. You cocked a brow. “What?”
“Teach with me.”
You blinked. Well, you weren’t expecting that. “Come again?”
“Teach with me,” he repeated as confidently as he’d said it the first time. You scoffed a laugh. 
“What? Why?”
Logan shrugged. “You’re better with the kids than I am, and it would give you a good opportunity to develop your mutation in a combat setting.” And I get to spend more time with you.
You hesitated. “I– I don’t know, Logan. It’s… I don’t think it’s a good idea,” While you wanted nothing more than yet another excuse to be around him, you didn’t know if getting back into teaching was the right thing for you at the moment. Yeah, you missed it. Fuck, you missed it more than you thought you would, but you really meant it when you said you weren’t cut out for it. If only you weren’t the only person who thought so. 
“One class.” he bargained. “Help me with one class tomorrow and decide from there.”
You pursed your lips, and Logan could almost hear your internal debate. “You’re not gonna let it go til I do it, are you?”
“Probably not,” he smirked, knowing he’d just got you to agree. Your resulting sigh confirmed it. 
“Fine. One class. No more than that.” In all honesty, you would have agreed just to see his resulting smile. 
“We’ll see about that bub, class starts at one tomorrow.” 
You nodded once, nerves suddenly bubbling in your gut. You were going to teach again, after being out the game for the last two years. Fucking hell you wanted to throw up. But you took a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before exhaling. Maybe this was a good thing. A blessing in disguise. Sure, it had been a while, but maybe Logan was right. Maybe your mutation would only develop under times of stress. You were incredibly stressed today, and look what happened. 
“Alright, I’ll talk to Charles and Scott, see what they say,”
Logan huffed, clearly irate with the idea. “Don’t give a shit what Scott says. He couldn’t help you after almost two hours. I was there for two minutes and you made progress,” he huffed, and you couldn’t help but laugh slightly. Was he… was he jealous? No, that wasn’t possible. What would he have to be jealous about?
“Alright tough guy, rein it in. The way you helped out earlier, it wouldn’t surprise me if Charles is telling him you should be taking over my training,” you hadn’t even thought about it before you said it, but now it was out your mouth, you realised it was entirely plausible. Especially since anyone with eyes or ears could see how much better you got on with Logan than you did Scott. Logan suggested one approach and it worked like a charm.
“Ya think so?” Fuck was the hope in his voice as obvious to you as it was to him? The idea of helping you with your mutation, whilst slightly terrifying, excited him. He couldn’t help but think that would be a learning experience for both of you.
“Yeah, why not? Like you said, Scott couldn’t help after two hours,” you shrugged, hopping off the table. “Anyway, I’m in dire need of a shower and comfier clothing, so I’ll see you in a bit.” Logan almost cried at the thought of you no longer smelling like you do now, and he had half the mind to tell you to forget the shower, you smelt that fucking good. But he also didn’t want the reputation of the weird-smell guy, so instead of trapping you in his arms and begging you not to, he simply nodded in agreement.
“Yeah, see you later.” He grumbled, trying not to be obviously annoyed by the fact the time you’d spent together was coming to an end. You shot him a confused look, before disappearing out the door and up the stairs to your room. Logan stayed for a few more minutes, his eyes closed as he finally let himself get lost in your scent. He wanted you. Fuck he’d only known you for a day and he wanted you. How the hell was he supposed to just behave normally now you were back living here? It simply wasn’t possible. 
He groaned, running a hand down the side of his face. On the one hand, he really wanted to spend more time with you. He was actively looking forward to spending time with you. But on the other, he didn’t know how much longer he could behave himself. He didn’t know how much longer he could keep up this ‘friendly’ banter with you without it crossing the line. Had it already crossed the line?
Jesus Christ, he didn’t even know. He couldn’t help thinking this was likely about to get extremely messy if he didn’t get his shit together. But, at the same time…
He always liked a little mess.
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Freshly showered, moisturised and pampered, you lay face up on your bed, your room feeling more like a forest than anything else. The steam from your shower still rolling out from your bathroom, and the more tropical plants you kept seemed to be absolutely thriving. You were thrilled, you really were, but you couldn’t take your mind off the day you’d just had. Not that it was over, it was only five in the afternoon, but so much had happened in the last day it was hard to wrap your head around.
You’d been replaced as a professor, your bedroom stolen, and you’d been informed that the mutation you thought you knew so well wasn’t actually what you thought it was at all, and that it could very well end you in seconds. You’d thrown a fit, broken your hand, dragged shadows toward you and constructed them into a pair of fucking awesome wings, and cooked with a man you’d known all of two minutes.
And the strangest fucking part was that you couldn’t get him off your mind. You couldn’t stop thinking about him. It was honestly getting a little irritating, seeing his face every time you close your eyes, hearing his laugh when your room got a little too silent. Feeling the ghostly touches of his arms around your waist, his hands on your neck. His breath against your ear. 
You flapped your arms down on your bed in defiance. You would not lie in bed thinking about him all evening. You refused. And luckily, due to an unexpected visit, you didn’t have to.
“He likes you, ya know,”
You screamed, whipping your head back to your door where you saw Kitty strolling in, completely unphased by your reaction. Grabbing one of your pillows, you threw it at her approaching form, watching as it soared straight through her body. Your jaw flapped, completely speechless. “I– Wh– Kitty! You can’t just waltz in here unannounced! Scared me shitless!” you exclaimed, running a stressed hand through your hair.
“Why? I always used to. Been gone that long, huh?” she asked, plopping down on the end of your bed and crossing her legs. 
“Yeah… guess I have,” It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence for your accommodation to be broken into. The moment rumour got out there was a mutant staying a few streets over the road, you had to move. Sometimes you hadn’t been quick enough and had spent the rest of the evening frantically scrubbing blood from beneath your fingernails, before making a quick exit.
Those were the times on your travels nobody needed to know about. Those were the times you’d keep to yourself. 
You jumped again as your door burst open, a frantic Logan looking you up and down before his eyes darted around the room. “You alright? I heard screaming,” he panted, slightly breathless from clearly having sprinted up the stairs. 
Your heart grew five sizes. “Yeah, I’m fine. Kitty scared the shit out of me, ‘s’all,” you shrugged, too focused on him to notice the woman of the hour beaming wildly, looking between the two of you. 
His shoulders sagged, the man visibly relaxing, his eyes lingering on yours. “Okay…”
“Okay…” you repeated, unable to tame your disobedient smile as he almost awkwardly nodded his head. 
“Right. I’ll uh, yeah. Leave ya to it,” he clicked his tongue, sending you one last glance to make sure you were really okay, before closing the door. 
You sighed, shaking your head fondly, chuckling quietly to yourself. 
“Oh. My. God. You like him too!”
Looking up with unnatural speed, you scoffed, waving your hand dismissively. “The fuck are you talking about?” you asked a little too defensively.
“I’m talking about you and Logan. He clearly likes you, and now I can see that you like him too! Oh, this is so fucking cute, just wait until I tell Marie, she’ll go fucking crazy!” Kitty clapped her hands excitedly, and you had to catch one of her wrists in order to stop her. 
“What are you on about? Logan doesn’t like me, we’re just friends,” oh, was it supposed to hurt that much to say it? But, in all honesty, you don’t think you were ready to confront whatever it was you felt for this man. For now, you were pretty content to bask in not knowing, and being kind of excited about it.
“Mhm? Friends don’t eye fuck in the kitchen.”
You choked. Her tone was so matter-of-fact that if you weren’t actually looking at her, you wouldn’t have believed you were talking to Shadowcat herself, Kitty Pryde. “Kitty! Christ, what happened to you? And we weren’t eye fucking. I was hungry and refused to cook insta-noodles, so we actually made a meal.” You explained. 
“For almost four hours? Meatballs take twenty minutes, twenty-five at a push,”
“We lost track of time!”
“I repeat, for four hours?” she asked again, folding her arms and raising one of her thin brows. You pursed your lips to stop yourself from saying anything else incriminating. “Though as much,”
“I didn’t even say anything!” 
“You didn’t need to, it’s written over your lovestruck face.” She poked her finger toward your nose, and all you could think about was the way Logan flicked your forehead beforehand or the way Logan gave you that little push back in the training room. Or the way Logan–
Christ on a fucking boat when would it end?
“I’m not lovestruck,” you mumbled, dragging your knees up to your chest. You debated telling Kitty about your predicament with your mutation, for the sole reason of explaining why you and Logan were spending so much time together recently, but you didn’t think you could bear the look on her face. The only ones who knew, to your understanding, were Scott, as the leader of the team, Jean, as the leading scientist, Charles for obvious reasons, and Logan because you told him. You didn’t really want another person to know your problems, especially not Kitty. 
You couldn’t bear to see her face when you told her you weren’t a phaser anymore. The mere thought broke your heart. You had matching mugs and everything. You couldn’t do that to her. Let alone sharing the idea that your mutation could simply not allow you to return back to the corporeal world one day, and you’d be stuck as nothing but wondering consciousness in the shadows for, effectively, all eternity. That was a little too morbid to talk about even with Logan.
“He’s just… helping me get back into the swing of things. I haven’t been a teacher for a long time, Kit, and since he took my position, he’s offered to help me–”
“Get back into teaching! Oh my god, he has, hasn’t he? That’s so exciting! I thought you didn’t want to get back into it?” She asked, untucking her legs and swinging them around so she was now lying comfortably on your bed, her head propped up on her elbow. 
“Well, we’re not getting ahead of ourselves, but yeah, that’s the idea. Gonna help him with his class tomorrow…” you trailed off, your heart beginning to accelerate at the thought of teaching your first class in two years. “So yeah, that’s why we’ve been spending so much time together. It’s nothing serious, promise! Plus, since most of the new students are kids I found, he’s pretty much the only person I don’t know here.” You flopped back down onto your bed, angling your head so you could still see her.
There was a moment of comfortable silence, a moment to let the conversation settle and for your heart to slow a little, before Kitty spoke up again. “He was really excited to meet you,” she offered quietly, and your brows raised subconsciously. “Everytime someone started talking about you, he’d tune in. He was subtle, but Marie noticed it first, and she told me to look out for it. He was looking forward to meeting you for the best part of a year.”
You took a deep breath. That couldn’t possibly be true. “You’re good at seeing things that aren’t there, Kit. I love you for it, but sometimes things really aren’t that deep,” you explained softly, trying your hardest not to smile at the image of Logan only tuning into the conversation if it was about you. It was definitely a stretch of the imagination, but it was a pleasant one.
“Yeah yeah, you watch. I’ll be keeping an eye on your totally platonic relationship with Professor Howlett but mark my words, you’ll be together by the end of the month,” Kitty smacked your calf to emphasise her point, and you shook your leg threateningly, laughing at the notion. 
“I cannot wait to see you eat your words. I’m sure they’ll taste of falsehoods and regret.” You flashed her a toothy grin, and she stuck her tongue out in retaliation. You’d missed moments like these. In all honesty, you hadn’t realised how lonely the last two years had been. Hadn’t realised how starved of friendship you’d been until you found yourself talking and laughing amongst friends again. You didn’t realise how much you’d missed this place until you came home again, to both the old friends, and the new. 
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inkdrinkerworld · 4 months ago
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hey there <3 I can’t find whether your requests are open so ignore this if you’re not accepting!!
I am on my knees asking for more of your bfb!remus… I need it, the world needs it. moony finally giving in after years of denying the reader for james’ sake 😫 this dynamic is everything
You're Jamies' baby sister and Remus can't believe he's got the fattest crush on you.
You're three years younger than him which isn't the thing that bothers Remus. What bothers him is the reaction James might have.
Remus should've never said yes to this damn vacation. You're all at the Potter's summer house, a life of dipping in the pool and then hitting the beach soon after.
Right now you're at the beach, and while James and Sirius are wrestling each other in the water, Remus can't pull his eyes off you as you build sandcastles and decorate them with shells that you'd found along the shore.
You can feel his eyes on you every now and then, and hide a smirk. You're pretty sure everyone knows you and Remus are head over heels for each other, he just never takes your advances as advances- much to your disappointment.
You shake your head a little, pieces of hair coming undone before you set your trap.
"Remmy, will you come help me?" You look up at him and the hair that had been braided back as all loosened and fallen in your face. You look like an angel of destruction like this- specifically his destruction.
"I'm not sure how well I can braid, dove. You know that's Jamie's strong suit." His knees crack as he stands and sets his book down before making his way over to you.
"Doesn't have to look pretty Rem, just need it out of my face so I can finish this castle."
Remus' hands are gentle as they pull the hair tie off, "Tell me if I'm pulling too hard."
You take a chance, "I can handle a little bit of pain, Rem." His breath hitches and you smile.
"Are you on the shore for me Remus? Because I'm a big girl now, you can go wrestle in the water with the boys."
Remus rolls his eyes, "I know you are, but why would I willingly let Sirius and James hold me under water?"
Remus' braid doesn't look as good as yours had, but it's swept all the hair out of your face. You turn to face him as he ties the braid off, a wide smile on your face.
"Remus I have an important question." you lean back on your palms and Remus can feel the back of his neck on fire. Your stupid little belly ring is a constant torment in his mind, always dangling over your tummy and making his brain short circuit.
"I'll answer if I can, dove." He's nervous, anything can come out of your mouth, no filter. He thinks it's sweet that you never censor yourself, Euphemia and Fleamont had ensured that their kids were never insecure about that.
You take a deep breath and Remus looks away from your glittery red bikini top. You smile and hide it quickly, "Are you scared to kiss me because of James?"
Remus looks over his shoulder, James and Sirius body surfing now. He leans in, sandy brown hair and hazel eyes all you can see- not that you mind.
"Or do you not like me anymore?" You know that's not true, but if Remus doesn't kiss you by tonight, you're going to go insane.
"Not like you?" Remus chuckles, his hand reaching for your cheek. "Dove, you don't ask silly questions." You really don't. "Of course I like you, I like you so much sometimes I can't look at you because I want to kiss you stupid."
It's your turn for your breath to hitch. "Then why haven't you kissed me yet?" Remus smiles, you sound so petulant and pouty, so unlike yourself that he leans in a little more.
Your nose brushes his, lips just barely touching and you frown. "Remus."
He groans, and pulls you closer, lips locking and you melt into him. It's a gentle kiss, experimental and slow. Your hands comb through his hair and pull him a little closer, making him deepen the kiss.
You hear whopping and hollering, "Fucking finally Moony!" It's your brother and the shock causes you both to pull away.
You heart is racing and Remus chases your lips for a second kiss. "Took you long enough." you whisper and he shakes his head.
"Did that kiss magically make you mouthy, pretty girl?" You nod, smiling like a giddy fool as Remus stares down at you.
"Moony, you couldn't wait till the end of the trip? Now I have to do the washing up for the rest of the week." Sirius moans as he and James meet you at your sandcastle fortress.
"No, I really couldn't." he's looking directly in your eyes as he says it.
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rememberwren · 4 months ago
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A Dichotomy of Thought || 8
Previous/Next Chapters Here
Poker Night
CW: non-consensual drugging, date rape drugs, non-con, dub-con, domestic abuse, sexual abuse, homophobia, slut-shaming, food control, fat-shaming, vomit.
-
He pops the tab on the soda can, the sound of aluminum grating against your frayed nerves. You sit at the table, hands tucked under your thighs because all you want to do is wrap them around yourself, hold yourself, feel a comforting touch, even if it’s only your own. He brings the soda over and sets it gently on the table in front of you.
It is Saturday morning. 
“I know last week wasn’t fair to you,” your boyfriend says, planting both hands on the table, the picture of rationality. “I don’t like keeping secrets from you. I’d like to think we’re past that point in our relationship. Don’t you?” 
You nod, teeth clenched tight around a scream. 
“So from now on—” he holds up a pill for you to see, then slips it through the open soda tab into the drink. He slides the drink forward toward you at the table. “No more slipping things in your drink without you knowing. From now on, you get to make the choice. Don’t misunderstand me. It’s going to happen either way. The sooner you get used to that, the better. What you get to control is whether you have a good time…or a bad time. So what’s it going to be honey? Good or bad?” 
You hesitate for a long moment. Your fingers are numb when you untuck them from beneath your thighs, trembling as you reach out for the soda—
—and tip it over onto its side, a sign of defiance. 
His placid mouth stretches into a wide grin. Soda drips off the edge of the table and onto the floor. Drip, drip drip. 
“Now,” he says cheerfully. “Why was I hoping you’d choose that?” 
-
It is Saturday morning.
He pops the tab open on a can of your favorite soda, pulled chilled from the refrigerator. Warm is best; it helps the pill dissolve faster, more thoroughly. But when the drink is icy cold, you are less likely to taste the bitterness on your tongue. If you try hard, you can pretend that it is your very first Saturday, that you have just been handed a drink by your boyfriend, that you have no idea what is in it. 
“We’ve got extra guests tonight,” he says, sliding the soda can to you. “I want you on your best behavior.” 
“I always am,” you mutter. 
“That’s just not true. Don’t bullshit me, baby. When you bullshit me, you bullshit the best.” He slides the drink toward you a little more, eyes dark and curious, wondering if you will drink this concoction that makes you relaxed and pliable, this drink that makes you enjoy the terrible things that are done to you. 
But Simon and Johnny will be there tonight. You glare up at your boyfriend and slide the soda back across the table. “You wouldn’t. Not in front of the new guys. I’m not stupid.” 
“Baby. You’re dumber than you look if you think I won’t do whatever I want in front of whomever I want,” he says with a laugh. He slides the drink back. “Next time you push that away, I’m dumping it down the sink. Make good choices.”
You almost do it for him. You really do. A part of you is sure that he’s bluffing; it just makes no sense. Why would he put himself at risk this way? But there’s a small frightened part of you that is always ready to be surprised, always ready to be taken to a new low, dragged to a fresher hell by these hands which were meant to love you. Maybe he would do it.
And is it worth it to defy him? You remember that one miserable Saturday after you had dumped the drink over. It had been one of the most painful, humiliating experiences of your life. Your Fridays afterward were often spent agonizing over the decision to come: was it worse to give in and drink? Did it make you wrong to not fight back, to even sometimes find moments of begrudging pleasure in your own rape? Did it make you weak? 
The thought of being like that in front of Johnny and Simon—soft and slurred and slutty—makes you feel…strange. You don’t want to think about it. The other side of the sword is just as sharp: if you don’t drink, you will be painfully aware of everything that happens to you, aware of Johnny and Simon’s participation—or their impending disgust. 
What is worse? 
Reaching out, you take the can with a shaking hand and go to tip it over—then change your mind at the last moment. You drink it down in its entirety, letting it fill your hollow, aching belly, even if the sugar makes you nauseous. 
Your boyfriend pulls a face, like you have pleasantly surprised him. He reaches out and takes the empty can from you and says, “Good girl.” 
You want to be sick.
-
“You’re in a good mood,” Simon says while making breakfast. He was up early this morning, well before Johnny awoke. Usually when Simon wakes first, he’ll take care of whatever business woke him and then lay in bed with Johnny until the other man wakes, but this morning when Johnny’s eyes blearily opened against the sunlight streaming in through the balcony doors, the bed was empty. Trust, he thinks. Simon’s beginning to trust him to be on his own more often 
“Could say the same fer you,” says Johnny with a grin, tapping the fingers of his hand against the table as he waits for his plate. His voice pitches lower when he asks: “Did yeh wake up on the right side of the bed, or are yeh just excited about what day it is?” 
Simon scowls. “Nothing to be excited about, Johnny. It’s not a recreational event.” 
“I don’t know,” Johnny says, leaning back in his chair. “I’m looking forward to it. 
“You can’t kill him.” 
“Heard that line before. Rehearse a few new ones.” 
“I mean it,” says Simon, bringing Johnny’s plate to the table and setting it in front of him. Classic English breakfast. Fuck, Johnny’s stomach does a flip, he’s so goddamn hungry. It’s cut into bite sized pieces, but Johnny can overlook that. It’s a necessary evil for now, until his coordination is a little better—which it is, every day. Next comes Johnny’s orange juice, but just as Johnny reaches for the glass, Simon holds it up out of his reach, a frown in place. “Promise me that this is just reconnaissance. You won’t try to kill him—no matter what may happen.” 
It’s Johnny’s turn to scowl. He lets out an irritated breath through his nose. 
“Gonna starve me if I refuse?” 
“Yes.” 
“Bastard.” 
“I don’t hear any promises.” 
“I promise, I promise. Gimme that.” Johnny takes the orange juice. Simon lets it go, sighing. Though Johnny has told him what he wants to hear, he doesn’t seem comforted by it, Johnny thinks as he tucks in to his breakfast. 
Maybe he can tell that Johnny’s lying. 
-
“How do I look?” Johnny asks. He has buttoned his shirt on his own—a feat which only took him five minutes of careful coordination and deep breathing. Give me a fucking medal, he thinks to himself as Simon comes over to help him button his jeans (which are still too difficult to manage, depending on the pair he pulls on). Simon’s hands so close to his cock have Johnny humming, close to a purr in the back of his throat. 
They still have not fucked since the accident, but Johnny thinks soon. 
“You look like you need a haircut,” Simon says, voice rumbling against Johnny’s back where they are pressed together. One of Simon’s hands brushes through the lengthening fringe of Johnny’s mohawk, and Johnny lets himself shut his eyes at the touch, feeling a satisfied, sleepy urge come over him. Simon presses a kiss to the nape of his neck, and warmth blooms in the pit of Johnny’s stomach. Simon’s been like this all day: affectionate, borderline clingy. Doting. 
It’s a far cry from the way they had treated each other all week prior, and Johnny finds himself grateful for the change of pace. 
But he can’t let himself be distracted now. Not when so much is on the line. Poker begins in less than an hour, and Johnny has promised Simon that he will be on his best behavior. It’s not a promise he looks forward to breaking—but what promise ever is? Johnny plans to keep his mouth shut and his eyes open, taking in intelligence and making plans. 
But if an opportunity presents itself—if Johnny can find a single moment alone with your boyfriend—Johnny won’t hesitate. What a terrible accident it will be, he thinks gleefully. 
He turns in Simon’s arms and must turn too quickly. He stumbles, nearly falling. Simon braces him, helping to hold him upright. He sees the strange look in Simon’s eyes and frowns. 
“What is it?” 
“I need to ask you something.” 
“Alright.” 
“Do you trust me?” 
“Aye,” says Johnny promptly, grateful for an easy question. “With my life. Yeh know I do.” 
“Do you trust me with her life?” Simon asks. 
Johnny sighs a little. Simon has been so obliging today, Johnny should have suspected that he was waiting until the last minute to try to talk him out of any hairbrained schemes. Still, he says: “Yes. Not much I wouldn’t trust yeh with, Si.” 
Simon hesitates. 
“What is it?” Johnny prompts, reaching up with his hand to cup Simon’s cheek. He isn’t used to cupping this cheek, and it feels odd under his palm, almost like touching a stranger. “Go on, get it out.” 
“Will you forgive me?” Simon asks. 
“For our fight? Aye. Water under the bridge.” Johnny leans forward and places a kiss on Simon’s mouth. Now that is familiar: the curve of his lips, the way their noses brush, the scent of him. 
Johnny is nearly out of the room, heading for his shoes (and his crutch, considering how unsteady he is on his feet) when Simon speaks again: “Not for that.” 
Johnny stops and turns. The room turns with him. Simon stands with his back to Johnny, his huge shoulders hunched, hands hanging loosely at his sides. Johnny wishes that he would turn around and look at him, let him see the look on his face—except when he does, there is something oddly recognizable there, an eerie familiarity that he can’t put his finger on but which makes Johnny’s heart pound. 
“For what, then?” Johnny wonders.
“For putting that Oxy in your orange juice.” 
Goosebumps prickle all along Johnny’s arms and thighs. He stumbles again, and Simon is right there to catch him. Johnny is always unsteady on his feet when he’s been taking his pain meds. He stares at his lover blankly, struggling to piece together the what, the how, the why. 
“Need you to be safe,” Simon whispers. “I can’t have you there Johnny. I need you to be safe.” 
“Y’ drugged me?” 
“Just need you to get some sleep. I’ll be back by the time you wake up, and when you do, I’ll tell you everything,” he says, helping Johnny towards the bed. Johnny collapses back against the pillows, weak not from the Oxy but from his own horror and shock. Simon says: “I promise.” 
“Fuck yer promises,” Johnny slurs, eyes misty. Simon sits by him on the edge of the bed, stroking his hair until he begins to snore. 
-
It’s all compartmentalized, his feelings packaged into neat boxes and put away in the safest recesses of his mind. It’s remarkably like being on an op, when he would have to triage his own emotions: cannot face that one yet—push it back and come back to it later (or never, if more convenient). He practically feels the mask slipping into place, down over his eyes and nose and mouth. No more Simon, just Ghost. Ghost on a mission. Ghost preparing himself to do and witness terrible things. 
He’s numb to it all. His hand doesn’t even shake when he knocks on the door to 7C. Your boyfriend answers, brows raised with mild, surprised politeness, as if he didn’t truly expect that Simon would show (and Simon didn’t show, Ghost thinks darkly, but this idiot has no idea of that). Ghost holds up the case of beer he bought from the 7/11 down the street and the other man’s mouth stretches into a grin. 
“I’ll take that from you—come on in. Make yourself at home,” he says, slipping the beer from Ghost’s hand. “Where’s your other half?” 
“Sick.” 
“Shame.” 
“He’s no good at poker anyway. Doesn’t have the face for it,” Ghost says. He doesn’t even consider asking about you, isn’t willing to compromise his own position by revealing any favoritism toward you. Moving inward, he comes to stand in the living room. It’s eerie being here, this strange reflection of his own apartment. There are differences: the kitchen and dining room are separate, only one bedroom here as opposed to the two at 5C. It is very clean, rather impersonal, without any pictures on the walls or framed photos on the end tables. 
There are hints of you: your shoes in the rack by the door, your name badge resting by your keys on the table in the foyer. But you are nowhere in sight. 
Two other men are already in the apartment, seated around a square dining room table, dividing out poker chips. Ghost runs an analytical eye over them even as he nods his head coolly in a greeting. They are relatively fit, though neither particularly tall. Likely low risk, though he would be a fool to underestimate them when they have the numbers in their favor. 
Before Ghost can even take a seat, there is another knock on the door and a third one enters. 
“Sorry I’m late,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Leah wanted my help putting the girls down for their naps.” 
“I hear a little whiskey goes a long way,” your boyfriend suggests, shutting the door behind the final straggler. Everyone laughs except for Ghost who merely raises his eyebrows in amusement. 
“You know Leah. She thinks there’s an essential oil for everything; alcohol ain’t it,” the man says. He points to Ghost. “Who’s this?” 
Your boyfriend comes to rest a hand on Ghost’s shoulder. Ghost takes notice of the height difference between them with distant, dim pleasure. “Fellas, this is Simon. He’s in the apartment next door. Let’s all pretend we’re gentlemen so as to not scare him off.” 
More laughs. Everyone takes a seat around the table. Beers are cracked open, and Simon feigns sipping at his as cards are dealt. He is pinned between your boyfriend and the straggler, but his back is to the wall which gives him a sense of security. His knife sits heavy where it is holstered against his lower back, keeping him from fully resting against the chair. 
He wishes that he’d brought a fucking gun. 
“So, Simon,” someone asks. “Are you married?” 
“No.” 
“Simon’s gay,” your boyfriend tells the room, though where he has gotten this idea from, Simon couldn’t say. Is that what you believed? Did you tell him as such?
The straggler beside him visibly shifts away after this news. One of the other ones pulls a face like he has sucked on a lemon. 
Simon has never put labels on himself—finds them constricting as opposed to comforting—but he’s been attracted to people of all genders at one point or another.  It’s good though, for him to be misunderstood. Let their misconceptions about gay men color their representation of him, let them think him weak or soft or whatever the fuck their homophobia believes. It rolls off of Simon like water off a duck.
“Problem with that?” Simon asks the straggler, picking up his cards. 
“No,” the man lies. Coward.
“Maybe your wife has an essential oil that will cure me,” Simon suggests. The table laughs at their friend’s expense, even the one who had pulled a face. 
A round passes; Simon lets himself lose. He listens to the conversations with one ear and to the rest of the apartment with another, straining for any sign of life from you. He hears nothing. 
Until: “So where’s the fiancé?”
When all eyes turn to your boyfriend, Simon realizes that you must be engaged. You don’t wear a ring, and you’ve only ever referred to him as your ‘boyfriend’. Maybe it is a new development—or a development that you don’t agree with. He feels a dim stirring of satisfaction at the thought, dampened beneath his persona. 
Your boyfriend gives a coy smile. “She’s around. You know how she gets around strangers. Shy.” 
“Does that mean no…?” They all share pointed glances. It’s clear that there is something they don’t wish to say around Simon. Ghost leans forward, elbows on the table, waiting for one of them to break and give him a hint. Beneath the table, someone kicks the shin of the one speaking. 
“Think I could use another beer,” one of them says, standing. The others agree hastily. “Simon? You good?” 
“I’m good.” 
The man disappears into the kitchen, but is only gone for a moment before returning. “There’s a goddamn lock on your refrigerator.” 
Your boyfriend laughs. He reaches into his pocket and works free a small silver key, handing it over. “Yeah—keeps the cows out of the pasture, if you know what I mean.” 
The table laughs—Ghost does not. 
“I don’t get it,” he says, sliding his cards toward himself across the oak table and examining them with mild interest. The others fall silent as Ghost makes this moment purposefully awkward. 
“Don’t worry about it,” your boyfriend says with a laugh in his voice. “Just a little inside joke we have around here.” 
Ghost hums. 
Another round passes. The guys share stories about their work, their wives or girlfriends. Some of them have children. Do they know what their friend does to you? Ghost wonders. Could they possibly not know? They occasionally make an effort to bring him into the conversation, but his answers are terse at best, and eventually they stop trying. 
More rounds, chips changing hands. The empty beer bottles begin to stand like silent sentinels around the tabletop. Ghost puts little effort into winning, preferring to perform average at best so as to not attract attention. He keeps a close eye on the clock, a fraction of his energy always thinking of Johnny at home. Johnny who is hopefully sleeping peacefully. 
The next hand has just started when the door to the bedroom bursts open so abruptly that the handle knocks against the outer wall. You stand in the doorway, your face twisted in some expression too complex for Ghost to begin to unravel. 
The table loses it. Shouts of your name, whistles, joyful perverse greetings—a half dozen hands reaching out toward you, like you are the final member of this party and they have only been waiting for you to arrive. Your shoulders are nearly by your ears, you're so tense, eyes flickering around the room from face to face, sticking on Ghost for a fraction longer than the others. 
One of the men manages to brush against your wrist with his fingers and you wrench your hand away as if burned. The knife at Simon’s back itches; he wants it in his hand.
Your boyfriend sighs, laying his cards down on the table. “What is it?” 
“I need to talk to you.” 
“It can wait.”
“It can’t.”
The two of you communicate silently for a moment: sheer stubbornness on your end with mounting frustration on his.  
At last, he stands with a roll of his eyes. “Excuse me guys. You all know how she gets.” 
The two of them disappear into the kitchen. Sensing his chance, Ghost pushes away from the table. “Think I need that beer after all.”
The others pay him no attention, ducking their heads together and talking under their breath to each other like a group of teenagers.  It lets him slip away from the table and linger outside the kitchen doorway, silent as his namesake. He holds his breath, listening, knowing that this is the moment he and Johnny have been waiting for: concrete proof that your boyfriend is mistreating you.
“—isn’t working. I didn’t cheek it, I swear. Give me another, please,” you’re saying quietly, voice thick with tears.
“Not gonna happen.” 
“Please! I don’t wanna—”
“Not gonna happen because there wasn’t anything in that soda, you stupid slut,” your boyfriend whispers softly. The words echo around in Ghost's brain, bouncing off the walls of his skull. Mission successful. “I just wanted to see if you’d drink it. Now go back to the bedroom and stay there until everyone has left. Understood?” 
There is no response. Footsteps are heard—
Ghost has enough time to duck into the bathroom and avoid him—but he doesn’t. He lets himself get caught by your boyfriend, both of them staring at each other, eyes hard and knowing. There’s no reason to keep up the charade anymore, not after what he just heard. 
“Need something, Simon?” 
“That’s no way to talk to a woman,” Ghost says, soft and dangerous. 
Your boyfriend rubs his tongue along the inside of his cheek. “If I were you, I’d mind the business that pays me.” 
“And if I don’t?” 
“Are you—threatening me?” he asks, head tilting in a manner of mild surprise. There’s something in his eyes that Ghost can’t identify, something that looks a lot less like the fear he would hope to see and looks instead like delight. 
“I don’t like that word,” he says. “Leaves behind a certain degree of uncertainty. If I ever hear you say something like that to her again—”
His words are cut off as from the kitchen comes a scream, a wordless shriek of rage followed by the ear-splitting shatter of a ceramic plate. Even Ghost jerks, eyes flickering to the kitchen doorway, but there is no sight of you. A plate careens into his line of sight in the doorway, shattering to bits on the floor where you have thrown it. 
“What the fuck,” your boyfriend mutters. Another dish shatters. He raises his voice, calm but booming: “Alright: everyone out. Poker night’s over.”
-
Simon returns to his apartment with heavy steps, feet nearly leaden with dread at what he is going home to, at what he has done. He opens the door to quiet darkness, steps inside, and lingers there just inside the door, listening for Johnny’s quiet snores. 
He hears quiet sniffles instead. Stomach clenching painfully, he follows the sound to the bedroom and finds Soap on the floor. He has rolled himself off the bed, likely awoken out of sheer willpower and tried to follow after Simon. Johnny looks up at him, pupils blown wide, eyes red and swollen from crying. 
“I’m sorry,” Simon whispers fiercely, kneeling down beside him. “I’m so sorry Johnny. I had to do it. You know I did.” 
“I hate you,” Johnny whispers back, tongue thick. All of the sudden, his face pales and he leans forward, vomiting on the floor between them. 
It is the least that Simon deserves.
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